#namjoon ff
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youmyjhope · 10 months ago
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Hey can you post namjoon moan just only Namjoon plzz 🥺
do not repost
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bangtanficsforyou · 2 years ago
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They Reject You (hyung line)- part three
Pairing: BTS x Reader
Word Count: 8K
Warnings: swear words here and there, a little kissing scene.
Jin
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"I told you, you should have done this sooner."
"Hey, if I had known this was gonna be this much fun, I would have."
"I did tell you, you just didn't believe me."
You huff. "Okay fine! You were right all along and I was wrong. Happy?"
Blair chugs down another shot and winces at the bitter taste. "I'll be happy when you listen to my advice."
"Asking for too much, now. Aren't you?" 
"Cool then, mop over a boy for over a month again. Why don't you?" She retorts with no real bite, rather genuinely enjoying the glimpse of the old you back. 
A wave of sadness hits you when you're reminded about the said boy and you sigh. "He isn't just a boy, he's also my best friend."
Blair immediately regrets her words when she notices the look on your face. "I understand that you would need time but if I hadn't dragged you out today, you would have not made any efforts to move on for at least another six months."
You feel an instant urge to deny it but end up not protesting because you know how true her words are.
Moving on would have been easier if you knew the answer to this one question; how does one move on from their best friend? 
How do you forget the moments that made you fall for him? Moments when he was the only one you could confide in. When you two would spend hours talking on the phone about random things. When the two of you would sit on the balcony and judge every passerby. The inside jokes, the tears, the hugs, the words of comfort. How do you forget those and tell yourself to not feel the way you do?
And even if you manage to do so, will the two of you really ever get back to being as close as you once were? Won't that result in you falling for him all over again?
You take hold of another glass of shot when you realise that you were overthinking again. Today your plan is to get enough alcohol in your system so that you do not overthink the little things.
"What is he doing here?" Blair whispers to herself.
"Who?" Your tipsy mind gets distracted by that and you start checking left and right to catch sight of the person she's talking about.
"Jin."
Your eyes widen in shock and you freeze in your seat. "Jin is here?"
Blair nods, feeling the same amount of disbelief as you. 
"Should I hide in the washroom?" You whisper shout. You don't even know why you feel the need to run when you and Jin have had a civil conversation just a few weeks ago. All you know is that you do not wish to face Jin. You are not ready to face the stir of emotions Jin would inevitably ignite.
"Fun fact, his eyes are fixed here," she quips with a mix of annoyance and amusement. "I'm also pretty sure, he's aware that we are talking about him."
You shut your eyes and groan audibly. "Fuck. Just what I needed."
"Fun fact part two, he's coming here."
As soon as she completes her sentence, you hear your name being called. 
"Y/N."
"Jin!" You put on a fake smile and try to seem as excited as you possibly can. You won't allow your spirits to dwindle so easily. "What are you doing here?"
Jin thinks for a brief moment if he should lie and say that it was a coincidence but then decides otherwise. "Well, Jimin texted me that you're here and I had something important to tell you, so,"
"Well, I don't feel stalked at all." You grin sarcastically.
Jin smiles. That's the first stage of you getting drunk; getting sassy. "Well, I'd be hurt if you were to call me a creepy stalker."
He says it with such a soft look of adoration that Blair has to clear her throat loudly to announce her presence.
"I'm Blair," she introduces herself.
Jin understands that Blair's words are directed at him and he politely puts his hand forward in greeting. "I'm Jin."
Blair nods and shakes his hand. From the look in his eyes, she already has an idea about why Jin might be here and if what she's assuming is right, she should really get out of here as quickly as she can. 
"Well, it's good that you are here, I have somewhere to go. Take care of her," as soon as the words are out of her mouth, Blair quickly leaves the spot knowing very well how you are going to react. 
You gasp dramatically, concerned about how quickly she changed her colours. What a traitor you have as a friend. 
Jin sits on the stool next to you before you can recover from your shock. "So what have you been drinking?" 
You look at Jin with your mouth parted open, still having a hard time understanding what just happened in the span of a few minutes. How you came to the club to temporarily forget about Jin and how now, you are sitting right next to him.
You blink a few times to let the shock subside and with Blair gone, you feel your adrenaline rush fade away.
"I don't know, Blair ordered it," you shrug.
He hums, fiddling with his fingers on the table. "Any special reason you are out here clubbing on a weekday?"
"Nah," you say just as casually as you had uttered the previous sentence. Maybe it's because of the alcohol but you don't find yourself feeling anxious in his presence. There's only a very little amount of unease but that's only because you don't want to get too into your emotions. 
Jin watches you closely. You don't look drunk, just tipsy. And thankfully, for him, you don't seem to be too bothered by the fact that he just invited himself. 
Someone might say that he's being overdramatic coming all the way to say something he could have said any other time. But when Jimin texted him that you're here, his thoughts started getting a little wild.
What if you were in a club trying to get over him? What if some hot bartender catches your eye? What if your friends are telling you that you deserve better? (The last one, Jin agrees with) 
It's fair to say that those thoughts made him rush to this place so that he can finally say what he figured out in the last few days.
Jin inhales deeply and asks the million-dollar question. "Do you– do you still love me?"
You choke on your drink and a series of coughs that follows. Jin immediately asks for a glass of water and helps you calm down.
"What kind of a question is that?" You ask in a raspy voice when your coughing fit subsides.
"A very important one?" He asks you back, his brows now furrowing in nervousness.
You mimic his expression, only that your brows furrow in annoyance. "What kind of people do you hang around with to get the idea that people's feelings change in the span of a few weeks?"
Ah, yes. You're sassy right now.
Jin's features soften and he looks at you with a look of disbelief.
"So you still love me?" He asks in a whisper, too scared to say the words out loud.
"Unfortunately, yes." You nod.
Before you can take hold of another glass of shot, Jin's hand comes to rest on yours. You look at him in confusion, wondering what even is he up to.
"Well, I love you too," a wide smile breaks out on his face as if the thought of you is enough to make him happy.
This time, you choke on thin air. "Excuse me?!"
He takes your hand and brings it to his lips. "I'm sorry it took me so long, but now that I know, I just want to be with you forever."
Your eyes follow his movements and you find your breathing getting shallower and only one question coming to your mind; Is this really happening?
Jin notices the way you seem to have run out of words. It makes him want to smirk in satisfaction but at the same time wrap you in his arms. Had he known you would react this way, he would have done this way sooner. But he was busy being a fool back then. 
You were always by his side, through the worst and the best. You were his only constant in the world of variables. He always felt so at home with you, that the thought of changing the dynamics never occurred to him. You two were perfect being best friends and he thought that was how it was going to be forever. 
But then he's also a hopeless romantic at heart. He has always dreamt of his perfect partner and what life with them will look like. He has also had his fair share of crushes and relationships but never did the faceless person from his dreams appear to be one of them.
Now that he thinks of it, he knows why that was the case. 
"You don't have to say anything," Jin adds, not wanting you to stress about it. "I just needed you to know that I love you and I'm sorry for realising it so late."
Now as sassy as you are when you're tipsy, you're just as bold. Without thinking any further, you lean forward and kiss him. It's odd and something your sober self would never do, but right now you're definitely not sober. Plus, you can leave the overthinking for her when she wakes up tomorrow. At the moment, the only thing that matters to you is that the man you so irrevocably love, loves you back. 
Jin freezes and his eyes widen in shock when he feels your lips on his. 
He knows you are only doing this because you are drunk. He knows that had you been sober you would have asked a million questions by now. He also, knows that he shouldn't be kissing you back but when he hears a whine of complaint from you at his lack of enthusiasm, his resolve crumbles. 
He gently puts his palms on your cheeks and kisses you back passionately. The warm sensation of your lips on his makes his head spin and he wonders how on earth has he gone so long without doing this. 
However, he pulls back when he feels your tongue against his lips. "We should get you home."
You shake your head like a stubborn child. "No, I don't want to go."
Gosh, he wants to kiss that pout away. How did he not realise that it's been you all along? 
Blair watches from a distance as you throw your hands in the air like a small child and a smile makes its way onto her lips. Guess, she won't have to worry about you moping anymore. 
Yoongi
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As soon as the doorbell rings, you freeze. That must be Yoongi.
You have been looking forward to this moment and at the same time have been dreading it. But it's one of those things that you know just needs to be done.
You haven't had a single moment of peace since yesterday. It's tiring honestly. You don't know how the conversation with Yoongi will go, but you at least hope that after this you won't feel this heavy weight on your shoulders and will be able to have a good night's sleep. 
With that hope, you open the door and you're greeted by Yoongi in a purple suit and the sight itself makes you swallow. You really wish you could marry him.
Shaking the thought away, you welcome him in and ask him to take a seat on the couch. 
"Would you like some tea or coffee?" You query
Yoongi shakes his head. "Nothing really. I had coffee before leaving."
Well then, guess you won't get the time to figure out how to start the conversation. 
You take a seat on the opposite couch and play with the rings that adorn your fingers. "I called you at my place because there's something important we need to talk about and I thought that a public place isn't suitable for the conversation."
Yoongi nods. He won't lie but he shares the same view. It's difficult for him as it is to talk about his emotions. He doesn't want to imagine having to explain why he came across as nonchalant to your confession and how he respects your honesty, more than he could show.
However, nothing could have prepared him for the next words that leave your mouth.
"I think we should not go forward with this marriage."
Your words cause Yoongi to choke. Out of all the things he wanted to discuss with you, he never saw this coming. "What?!"
Seeing Yoongi react like this catches you slightly off guard. Usually, he always has his emotions in check and is unreadable. It always makes you feel like he's out of reach. However, right now, you can read him like a book, which oddly enough gives you a sense of satisfaction.
"We should not get married." You repeat your words and wait for Yoongi's shocked features to subside. 
Yoongi looks at you and notices how determined you seem, as if you have thought about this long and hard and only then have you come to this decision. The thought that there's probably no changing your mind, scares him. 
Clearing his throat, he tries to sound as calm as he can. "Why though?"
Now it's your turn to be surprised. Isn't it obvious why the two of you shouldn't get married?
Chewing on your lower lip, you ponder how you should frame your words. After a brief pause, you start with a gentle tone that somehow comes out sad.
"When two people love each other, they get married. Not because they have to, but because they want to. It's like this celebration of their love, where they declare to the world that they are each other's for the rest of eternity. But you see, that's the most important factor–" you look up to lock eyes with Yoongi. "–love."
Love. 
It's a word Yoongi has hardly ever given thought to.
Yoongi knows what it feels like to be loved. His parents love him, his sister loves him, his friends love him, his dog loves him. He also knows what it is like to love someone because he loves these people just as much. But love in the way you describe it? Yoongi has never felt that.  
From a very young age, he has known that it will be his parents who will choose who he is to marry. Which is why he has never felt or given much thought to what it is like to want to spend his whole life with someone. 
But clearly, you have. 
It looks like you know exactly what you want and he won't lie, he envies that. He wonders what it's like for someone to know what they want so clearly that they won't settle for anything less. 
"We can always fall in love," he says with a small shrug as if it's not a big deal. The gesture makes his words look insincere and although it's true that he doesn't realise the intensity of his words, it's also true that he had shrugged simply to hide how uncomfortable he feels. He has never had to talk to someone about falling in love with them. 
You chuckle humorlessly. "I don't think you realise what falling in love really means." 
Yoongi wants to feel offended by your words but he can't. Because you're right. "Well, it's never too late to learn."
You can tell that Yoongi is being genuine. But you don't know how you should perceive his genuineness. Should you feel flattered that he's willing to give your marriage a try? Or should you feel sad that he has to try falling in love with someone? 
You don't know what the answer to that would be but the thought of him falling for you because he had no other choice, does not sit right with you. Even if you two were happy one day, maybe somewhere at the corner of your mind will be the thought that he fell for you only because you two were forced into this marriage. 
"I don't think it will work, Yoongi," you say with a sigh.
Yoongi's brow furrows in frustration. Why are you complicating things like this? "I don't understand what exactly is the problem?"
Here goes nothing.
"We have been on ten dates so far and on none of those occasions, did you ever seem interested in getting to know me on a deeper level. You are a closed book and I respect that it might not be easy for everyone to be open, but what counts is the effort. We have never had an open conversation or proper communication." Your voice comes out even, not a speck of anger or disappointment lacing your words. It sounds like you're only reading out observations from a science experiment. "Why do you think that is? If you were to ask me, and I might be wrong, but it's because you were never interested in the prospect of marrying."
"Had I not asked to break the marriage, things would have been pretty much the same and I would have never voiced these thoughts. You would have made no effort and I would have been trying way too hard to fulfil my wishes. Don't you see how wrong that could go?" 
Yoongi remains speechless with his mouth parted. 
"It's not only that, though," a small smile appears on your lips. "When you believe in love as much as I do, you'd know that love is inevitable. Everyone deserves it, including you. And I hope that when you do fall in love, you get to walk with them with your head held high without worrying about the wife you had to marry to boost your business."
With each word that comes out of your mouth, you feel a weight being lifted off of your chest one by one. Last night, you stayed up with countless thoughts running through your head. Countless reasons and scenarios why this marriage won't work and would be painful for both of you. Especially you.
Yoongi takes a deep inhale and lets the silence linger. 
What else is even there to say? You have given this a whole lot of thinking while he has hardly ever thought about it. Which only goes on to prove your point and how different both of your views on marriage are. 
Indeed, he has never shown much effort towards establishing a connection between the both of you. There's no denying that, but he wishes he could tell you that it's not because he wasn't interested in forming one but rather that he does not know how to. 
He knows there's no point in clarifying that now though, it will only sound like he's making excuses. Hence, he settles for responding to you with the only sentence that he thinks is relevant. 
"We can't break this alliance."
"I know," you nod. "It won't be easy but I'm sure we both will come up with a way to convince our parents."
Yoongi huffs, sensing that you are underestimating his words. "Do you know that the deal has been signed?" 
Your eyes widen in shock and disbelief. "What?! H–When?" 
Your reaction is enough for Yoongi to know that you indeed, had no idea about the papers being finalised and signed. Your previous words make much sense to Yoongi now and why you thought that the two of you even had any other option but to get married to each other. 
"About a week ago," he replies, expression now turning sombre. "I got to know about it only a couple of days ago."
A week ago? That would be around the time you and Yoongi went on your last date where you had confessed to him your feelings. Was it around the same time that both of your doors to escape were closed? 
Panic shoots through your veins when the thought that there might be no way out, comes to your mind. No, no, no. There has to be some way. 
But is there really?
Yoongi's company is way bigger than your father's. If the two of you back down now, the deal will be cancelled but it will be your father's company that will suffer the most whereas Yoongi's will recover in a few days. It was one thing if the deal was not signed. No gains, no losses. But now, it would be no gain, only losses. 
How can you do that to your parents knowing how much stress it will cause them?
You can't.
"I don't have any other choice, do I?" Your voice comes out small, highly in contrast with how confidently you were speaking a few minutes ago. 
"I don't think we do," Yoongi sighs, a deep sadness looming over his chest at how dejected you look. "But if it makes you feel any better, we can make a deal."
An abrupt chuckle escapes your lips. "Another deal? Haven't we already had enough?"
"This deal gives you the choice to be free," he comments, noticing how a small hopeful glint appears in your eyes.
"How?" 
"Let's stay married for a year, if you still want an out after that, we will get divorced." 
Yoongi's words give you a pause. 
You can't say that the deal is ideal but it is better than nothing. It gives you the hope that the two of you won't be stuck in a loveless marriage. It also does not create the pressure of being happy with each other because that's the only option.
After thinking for a few moments, you realise that this indeed is what it has all come down to and you'll have to accept it whether you like it or not.
"What about the business deal?" You query, your brain jumping to the concerns of the after-effects of having a divorce.
"By that time, the majority of shares will be transferred to me, I'll take care of it so that there is minimal loss."
You nod and sit back, feeling exhausted from the emotional rollercoaster this conversation has been. You just wish things were simple. That you both could get married to people you were in love with. Or that you both were in love with each other. 
The thought makes you look at Yoongi. You can still feel the butterflies in your stomach but there's also this dread that tags along.  
Last night, you had considered every possible scenario, and each one of them convinced you why this marriage is not a good idea. But out of all those, there was one which stood out, one that scared you the most and was the most heartbreaking. 
The possibility of you falling in love with Yoongi but his response being the same as it was on your last date. You know that the pain you went through this time, would be nothing compared to the pain you would experience then.
You don't want that.
The thought scares you so much, that you make a promise to yourself to not let your guard down so that the situation never occurs. 
Hoseok 
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"You went a little too hard on us today," you say, breathless as you take a bottle of water and uncap it. 
Hoseok chuckles. "You say that after every class."
"Do I?" You ask with a small smile, knowing very well that you indeed do. But can you be blamed when Hoseok loses track of time when it comes to dancing and the only thing he focuses on is perfection?
He raises a brow as if asking you to stop pretending and you raise your arms in the air in mock surrender. 
He chuckles and shakes his head in amusement. "That's what I thought."
"Oh by the way," you say all excited. "I binge-watched little women during the weekend."
Hoseok's grin widens at the thought that you took the time to watch his recommended show. "Did you enjoy it?" 
A thoughtful look appears on your face. "I think it would have been better if the girls had more wins throughout but then I guess it wouldn't have been realistic."
Hoseok hums, understanding where you're coming from. That's an emotion he shares as well. While watching the show, he too wished that the girls didn't have to go through so many ups and downs.
"But you know what I liked?" You say with sparkling eyes. 
"What?" Hoseok asks, the gleam in your eyes doing something to his heart. 
"Choi Do-il's character!" You say with a small smirk on your lips.
Hoseok finds your behaviour amusing. "Liked him huh?"
"How can I not? He's so cool! He was so loyal to In-joo and he has such a sharp mind, made such tough decisions on the spot." You blabber. "I wish there was someone like him in real life, I'd fall for him in the blink of an eye."
"I wonder what Henry would have to say about that," he replies in a teasing tone, trying to pull your leg. But his smile fades when he sees that your excited expression has now turned sombre. 
You shake your head with a soft smile. "Well, we have broken up, so I don't think he would have anything in particular to say."
Hoseok hates that his first reaction is that of joy, which is soon followed by a feeling of guilt. He had convinced himself that he wasn't waiting for this particular day but now, his reaction clearly proves otherwise. 
For the time being, he puts his emotions aside and puts your feelings first.
"Do you want to talk about it?" 
You sigh. "There isn't anything to talk about. The relationship had run its course."
And that's the truth.
Things were pretty smooth at first, but when the honeymoon phase faded, somewhere down the line, both of you realised that you two weren't right for each other. 
The breakup wasn't painful for either of you and maybe that's what acceptance is supposed to be like. It was coming to this understanding that the both of you make great friends but there isn't much hope when it comes to something more than that. 
Hoseok chews on his lower lip and wonders what's the right thing to say. 
It has been six months since that day in the club and five months and three weeks since he realised that his feelings for you run deeper than he had initially thought. 
The first three weeks that followed after his realisation was not easy for him at all. He tried his best to be in denial but with time, he couldn't deny it anymore and he felt anger. Anger towards himself for having the audacity to accept that he has any form of romantic feelings for you after you had been so brave about yours and had put your heart on a plate only for him to be a complete dumb wit. Which was soon followed by the feeling of loss. He lost the opportunity when he had it and won't probably ever get it again. 
But after that, it started getting better. 
He accepted the fact that you have moved on with someone else and are happy with them. But that doesn't mean he did not get jealous every once in a while when he stumbled upon a picture of you and Henry on Instagram. That little spark of jealousy would serve as the reminder that somewhere deep down, he still wishes for you to be his. 
There have been times when he had thought about what he would do if someday, years later you and Henry were to break up. But never did he prepare himself for it. Plus, now, he finds it ridiculous that he had always thought that this would be an opportunity for him to correct his mistake when you could have very well removed any feelings for him from the very root. 
Before he can figure it out though, you sense the awkward silence and make an effort to break it. "I'm over it though, it does not bother me."
Hoseok nods softly, his thoughts still muddled. "How long has it been?"
"About a month."
Hoseok observes you closely from his peripheral. He notices how relaxed your features are and concludes that the topic of your breakup isn't necessarily a painful one for you. You also seem, pretty okay with the idea of the two of you having broken up, which makes him hope that you have moved on from Henry. And if in case you haven't, he will wait as long as it takes for you to let someone new in and he will do everything he possibly can to be that someone.
"This might be inappropriate but are you planning to return to the dating world?" Hoseok tries to look as casual as he can by pretending to arrange the CDs on the shelf.
It takes a few moments for you to think about the question before you can come up with an answer.
Are you looking for someone you can date? Not really. 
When you had downloaded Tinder all those months ago, it was simply so that you can find a distraction from Hoseok and move on. Fortunately, you found that and more in Henry. But now, that chapter is over and you don't find yourself actively looking for someone to be with.
"Not at the moment, no," you reply honestly. "Maybe a few months later, I'll reinstall Tinder," you laugh at the thought.
Hoseok hums, with his back facing you. "When you decide to reinstall the app, do tell me."
You don't think much of his words and innocently ask, "Why?" 
The whole of Hoseok's body heats up in anxiety and he starts putting the CDs on the shelf at a much high speed. "Because then I'll install tinder too and will search you up."
Your frown morphs into an expression of surprise and your lips part to form a small 'o'. 
Is…..is Hoseok saying what you think he's saying? Is it his way of saying that he would like to take you out on a date? And say, if the answer to these questions is, yes, what will you do?
In the six months that you have been with Henry, you haven't thought of Hoseok in that way. The intensity of your feelings lessened and you could let yourself be friends with him without letting your feelings get in the way. 
But are your feelings for him gone? 
You don't know.
Hoseok is a great friend of yours. He is nice, charming, kind, helpful and talented. Not to mention that he is utterly gorgeous. Anyone would be lucky to have him as their partner. But do you still want him as one?
You look at Hoseok and realise that the thought of being with him doesn't feel weird. If anything, it causes a little bit of excitement to stir up in your stomach.
It's true that your crush on him is not as deep as it once was and you're not looking for a relationship at the moment, but for some reason, you feel like when you're ready, you may just fall for him harder than you have ever before. 
Clearing your throat, you come up with a response that you think is just right. "In that case, I'll have to make sure that I don't forget to tell you about it." 
Hoseok turns around immediately to look at you with a surprised look as if that was the last thing he had expected you to say. But when that surprised look turns into that of relief, your previous questions about Hoseok's intent are answered. 
A smile appears on his lips when his surprise fades and he makes a promise to himself to not waste the chance you have been kind enough to give him again. "I'll eagerly wait for that day"
Something in your heart blooms at the soft look he gives you and you nod. 
After that, both of your chit-chat resumes and you two giggle and laugh like never before while you pack your stuff. Once you're done, you get ready to leave. "I'll get going then?"
With a gleeful smile, Hoseok responds, "see you next Saturday."
As you're walking out of the door, a thought appears to you. "Oh, also, you can't search for people on Tinder."
And then you're gone. 
Hoseok watches your retreating figure and he has to try really hard to stop smiling like a fool. 
Maybe there will be no need for Tinder after all. 
Namjoon
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"I love Y/N," as soon as the words are out of his mouth, he winces, anticipating and dreading Yoongi's reaction. 
Yoongi, on the other hand, merely blinks at Namjoon's words. ".....and?"
Out of all the reactions, Namjoon thought Yoongi would give, this was not one of them. This makes things way scarier for him because he thinks this is Yoongi's version of 'calm before the storm'. 
"Listen, you can be mad at me all you want. I understand but I just wanted to let you know." Namjoon rambles, his voice coming out high-pitched. 
A small frown appears on Yoongi's face. This is it, Namjoon thinks.
"Why do you assume that I'm mad?" Yoongi's question, however, leaves Namjoon perplexed. He searches for any form of pretence on Yoongi's features but when he doesn't find any, he sighs.
"I don't know–" Yoongi's frown deepening is enough for Namjoon to backtrack and start speaking the truth. "–you told me that if I were to ever try to show interest in your sister, our friendship would be over."
"I mean, I don't recall saying that but it does sound like something I'd say," Yoongi nods. 
Now it's Namjoon's turn to frown. Is Yoongi mad or not? "What am I supposed to make of it?" 
"Nothing," Yoongi shrugs. "I should rather ask you, what was your purpose in telling me that you have feelings for Y/N? Was it because you felt like you had to ask for my permission? Or were you scared that it would affect our friendship?" A chuckle escapes Yoongi's lips. 
Namjoom sighs, feeling his muscles relax as he finally lets himself realise that Yoongi isn't mad. "I think it's more of the latter."
"So you won't ask for my permission, before pursuing her?" A scowl appears on Yoongi's face which immediately makes Namjoon stutter.
"I–I–I didn't mean that. Of course, I would ask for your permission." 
Yoongi tries his hardest to hold back the satisfied smirk that tries to make an appearance. It's nice to see Namjoon being scared of him every once in a while. 
"That's better," Yoongi hums. "And you don't have to worry about ruining our friendship and all that shit. That's very high school."
Namjoon feels like he can breathe again. After weeks, it feels like he can finally be honest with himself and most importantly with you, without being scared. A wide dimpled smile appears on his face at the thought of finally confessing to you. 
"Gosh, that's annoying," Yoongi huffs, with no real annoyance in his tone. If anything, he's glad to see the wide grin on his friend's face. "If she does reciprocate your feelings and the two of you become a couple, I do hope that the two of you don't turn out to be one of those intolerable ones."
You find almost everything intolerable. That's the thought that comes to Namjoon's mind but before he can speak those words, a much scary thought appears to him which takes his breath away. 
"What if Y/N does not accept my feelings?" His voice comes out in a whisper, too scared to speak those words loudly. 
Yoongi thinks the chances of that happening are very low. But he chooses not to say it. It's your feelings, you're the only one who knows where they lie. Yoongi does not wish to assume. Instead, he chooses to assure his friend that even if he were to get turned down, he will be there for him. 
"I will order a bottle of champagne and soju, each. If things work out, then we will celebrate with champagne. If they don't, then we can have soju." 
Namjoon is grateful for Yoongi's words, he really is but the fear that courses through his veins makes it impossible for him to think straight. "You don't get it. She confessed to me and I turned her down."
This time, a genuine scowl appears on Yoongi's face. "Why would you do that?"
Namjoon lets out a heavy breath. "I thought you'd be mad and our friendship would get ruined."
Yoongi tries his hardest not to let his eyes roll but ultimately fails. "Now I remember why I had told you not to pursue my sister."
Namjoon's heart drops at the comment. Is Yoongi about to change his mind? 
"One because it was high school and you were going through your fuckboy stage," Yoongi says, with squinted eyes that make it obvious that he's judging Namjoon. "Second, you were dense as fuck at times. Which, clearly, hasn't changed even now."
That had been two days ago. 
After the very scary chat session with Yoongi, Namjooon needed some time to recover. Two days to be exact. Now he has finally managed to grab the courage to talk to you and be honest. 
His hands hover in the air for a few moments before he knocks. He hopes and wants this to go well, otherwise, he thinks, he won't be able to forgive himself.
You frown when you hear the knock. Who has decided to bother you on a fine Sunday? 
You set aside the book you were reading and begrudgingly get up. With heavy steps, you head towards the door and swing it open. The regret that hits you is instantaneous. You should have checked through the peephole before opening. 
Namjoon notices your features drop and it makes him feel terribly guilty for his actions and words. With that guilt, also comes the strong need to make things right. 
"Do you need something?" You keep your tone cold to avoid any display of emotion. It's not that you are mad at him for the rejection. You're hurt about it, sure. Mad? No.
However, you feel incredibly embarrassed about confessing the way you did. You are aware that you were under the influence of alcohol but that doesn't make it any less humiliating. 
"I need to talk to you," Namjoon replies shakily as he finds his anxiety increasing. What if you have decided to move on or have come to the conclusion that he isn't worth it? 
You'd really like to make an excuse as to why you wouldn't be able to talk right now but something in you makes you decide otherwise. Maybe it's because you don't want things to be awkward between the two of you as it would put Yoongi in a tough spot. Or maybe it's because you hate seeing Namjoon so anxious, that you find yourself moving out of his way.
"Can I take a seat?" He asks awkwardly, with his index finger pointing at the couch, when he realises that you are simply waiting for him to start talking about whatever it is that he is here for. 
You are aware that you are being rude but you honestly don't know how to behave 'normally' around him, anymore. So, you simply hum and wait for him to take a seat. 
"Uhm," he clears his throat, "I wanted to talk to you about what happened at the party."
"We can talk about anything but that," you say pointedly. There's no way you are going to talk about that night when all you want is to leave that memory somewhere far behind. 
Namjoon notices the discomfort that etches your features despite your attempts at hiding it and sighs. "Okay, then I won't bring that up but I need to tell you something."
"Go on."
Namjoon takes in a deep breath before closing his eyes to grab the courage to let the words spill out. "I'm in love with you."
At first, the words don't sink in. 
You stand there, leaning against the wall, watching Namjoon. However, when you see the scared and anxious look on his face, you replay his words in your mind. 
I'm in love with you.
He's in love with you. 
The thought makes you angry.
You scoff. "Do you expect me to take you seriously?"
Namjoon shakes his head. "I don't expect you to but just hear me out."
"I don't want to." You declare stubbornly.
"I know but give me just one chance to explain myself." He pleads gently, not wanting you to feel as if you have to hear him out. He has already caused you enough pain and if you choose that you do not wish to hear him out, he is going to respect that. 
You want to laugh at Namjoon's request. You can accept the fact that he does not have feelings for you, no matter how hard that might be. But accepting that he is in love with you after the pain that you have been through? You can't accept that.
You'd very much like to close this topic and never have either of you mention it. But you can't say no to Namjoon when he looks like that. He is one of your biggest weaknesses and not hearing him out would cause you pain as well.
Instead of telling him verbally that you will hear him out, you look out of the window and stare outside blankly, which is enough for Namjoon to know that you're listening.
"I never thought that my feelings would be reciprocated. Which is why, I did not know what to say and said what I thought was right, at the time," his voice comes out vulnerable. 
You feel your annoyance flaring. If that really were the case he could have just said the truth. Why lie? Whose first instinct is to lie about their feelings, upon realising that they are not one sided?
Namjoon's next words answer your unasked question. "After my last two relationships ended the way, they did, I thought that all my relationships were destined to be doomed. I was scared to commit to anyone, especially you."
He sighs. "If we were to date and break up, it would change everything not only for the both of us but also for Yoongi. And if that were to happen I'd never be able to forgive myself."
It was around the time that Namjoon mentioned his last two relationships, that you stopped pretending to not care about what he had to say. You know how sensitive the topic is for him and for him to bring it up now, it must be serious. 
To put it simply, his last two relationships ended terribly. But each time, Namjoon blamed himself and thought that it was entirely his fault, which you know isn't the case.
Now that Namjoon breaks it down to you, you find your anger fading and find yourself sympathising with him. You may not agree with his actions but you can understand where he was coming from.
What you don't understand, however, is why he is telling you these things. If you're understanding him right, he said what he said at the party because he was scared. But now, he is here, telling you that he loves you. But why?
"Why are you telling me this?" You ask and you are surprised by the lack of coldness in your voice. Maybe it's because he's being vulnerable with you that gives you the courage to put your embarrassment aside for the time being.
Namjoon smiles softly. "I had a chat with Yoongi and it made me realise that I am the only one who thinks this way."
He was indeed scared shitless of his feelings affecting the friendship between him and Yoongi. He had taken Yoongi's cautionary way too seriously and while he was under that impression, what scared him even more was that he would take the risk of being with you only to later wish that he had stayed in his lane. He thought that maybe Yoongi too shares the same viewpoint as he does and hence had asked him to stay from you.
When he had gathered the courage to talk about it to Yoongi, it was with the intention of getting Yoongi's approval. Namjoon already knew that he wasn't going to listen to the voice in his head and that you were worth the risk. 
However, when Namjoon went back to his dorms and thought about the conversation he had with Yoongi, it made him realise that he was the only one who was holding these beliefs. Not only that, but Yoongi's reaction made him believe in himself, because even if Yoongi won't ever say it out loud, his calm and nonchalant behaviour was him letting Namjoon know that he trusts him.
"Plus," Namjoon continues, "I know I would regret it forever if I were to let you go simply because I was scared." 
You swallow at his words as any remaining trace of anger is washed away from your body. 
You know it can't be easy to do something when your insecurities are constantly telling you to do otherwise. But him doing just that, serves as a testimony of his love for you. Hence, even though at the beginning you weren't willing to accept his declaration of love, now you find your heart melting.
"So," you fiddle with your fingers. "What does all this mean?"
"Well if you have forgiven me for my stupidity, I'd like to take you out on a date." Namjoon hopes it isn't too soon to ask you out. But more than anything else, he wishes for your forgiveness. 
His words make your chest hurt and you immediately rush to make things clear. "There's nothing to be forgiven, I never held a grudge against you."
"But you wouldn't even look at me?" He asks, with a pained look.
Your heart sinks further. You had thought that it was only painful for you clearly that wasn't the case. "That's because I was embarrassed. It's just incredibly stupid to get drunk because you saw the man you love kissing someone else and then going and confessing like that."
Aaaahhhh.
Right, that whole him making out with someone, thing. He now remembers you mentioning it at the party. 
"Sorry to break it to you, but I did not kiss anyone," a small amused smile plays on his lips. "I was only helping the girl to get rid of something that had gotten into her eyes."
Your eyes widen when you hear that. Gosh, could you be any more stupid? You close your eyes tightly and groan in annoyance. 
Namjoon gets up from the couch and slowly walks towards you. He understands why it might have looked like he was making out with someone, after all, parties have the worst lighting. But he doesn't want you to feel embarrassed about it. After all, if it hadn't been for that misunderstanding, you would have never confessed and neither would he. 
After a small moment of hesitation, he puts his palm on your cheek and urges you to open your eyes.
"Hey," he whispers. "I'm really glad you misunderstood things that day. But I can assure you, that yours are the only lips I would ever want to kiss."
His words make you gulp. Here you were drowning in embarrassment a few moments ago and here you are now, breathless from the close proximity.
"Prove it," you whisper back. 
Namjoon's eyes fall on your lips. As much as he would like to feel how soft your lips are, he wants to do things right. 
With great willpower, he brings his eyes back to yours and kisses you on the forehead. "Trust me, there's nothing more I want than kissing you right now. But I want to take you out on a date first."
You chuckle at his words. "Well then, take me out on a date and at the end of it, kiss me like you mean it."
Namjoon's heart does a little dance at your words and he already feels his mind coming up with ideas of how he can make the date one that you never forget. "I'll make the date as perfect as you are."
Maybe you two will indeed be like one of those couples, Yoongi finds intolerable.
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A/N: I definitely plan to write a Ceo Yoongi series with these two, hence that's how I decided to write them for this part!
For early access to maknae line and for choosing what characters you want the maknae line to play, head over to my patreon! Hope you enjoyed reading this part!
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alphabetboyluvr · 1 year ago
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back to you | knj
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REQUEST | @btsgotjams27
VIBES | angst 
SOUNDTRACK | back to you - alexander stewart
HOLLY'S NOTE | tense jaw namjoon gets me feeling a certain type of way so thank youuuu for requesting this!! no warnings - references to shagging cos ofc and approx (1) questionable reference to Saint Augustine lmao. also joonie is 25 in this!! don't shout at me!! i know he's not 25 irl!!
WORD COUNT | 2.5k
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Namjoon watches the metronome on his desk tick... tick... tick..., ignoring the glare of the monitor screens in front of him.
There are two. One's open on the definition of a word that's been lodged in his frontal lobe for months, now, and the other is crammed full to the brim with dark grey producing software that he's sick of seeing. The windows open encase remnants of love songs that he can't seem to finish. 
It's not for a lack of trying. Just impossible, he thinks. 
They're an amalgamation of a love he never thought he'd lose, and the hopes of a future basking in it; notes of adoration dedicated to a devotion he didn't realise was quite so delicate, until his clumsy hands got a hold of it. 
Mementoes for memories he can't bring himself to relive, they sit; solemn, unchanged. It's been like this for months. They're artefacts, now. Relics. Souvenirs. Trophies of a conquest he never entirely won; a bygone era in which his hair was lighter and the sun shone more frequently. Eventually, they'll be laid to rest in the paper waste icon down in the far corner of his screen. 
No good. Not fit for use. Discarded before they've reached full maturity. 
"Maturity," he mimics the screen with great contempt. He's 25. Brain's developed. Science says so. 
And yet the loss he's mourning is all thanks to his perceived 'maturity,' or lack thereof. 
It's not like you're dead, or anything dramatic like that. He knows he's being irrational. Knows his immaturity is shining through as he wallows in self-pity, four empty takeout cups of coffee waiting to be thrown away on the edge of his desk. He only leaves the studio to shower. 
Doesn't even really sleep much these days. Has grown a little stubble; wonders if maybe that would make you think he was more mature. More grown-up. He sneers a little as he jots down a lyric idea; something about fine wine, how it ages, and how it was ironic you preferred cheap-as-shit soju instead of the bottles in his cooler.
In fact, when he really thinks about it, Namjoon thinks you were fucking mad to cite 'maturity' as a reason for you to break up. 
He's old before his time; grew up quickly cause he didn't have a choice. Took it as an insult when you said 'we're at different stages in our lives.' Knows damn well he'd have stood on any stage with you. Fuck Wembley, fuck Jamsil, fuck SoFi. Fuck 'em all if they meant he couldn't have you.
But Namjoon would never give it up. You knew this at the time, and truthfully, so did he. 
You would have never asked him to - but you can't dictate your life around him, and his plans, and his obligations. You've desires and goals of your own. Five years his senior, the impending pressures of your friends settling down - celebrating milestone anniversaries, moving back to your hometown to raise their families after their wild twenties spent in the big cities - was getting to you. It felt like you were lagging behind. 
Whether either of you liked it or not, your relationship was a huge factor in that. You couldn't even tell your friends you were dating him. It's not like you ever wanted a huge legacy, but the erasure of your history together hurt. 
A year of your life has been lost to a relationship that you can never speak of. There's an NDA. And even if there wasn't, you've too much respect for him to ever go against his wishes, or put him in a situation that could implode everything he's worked so tirelessly for.
So yeah, maybe you were out of line when you said he was immature, but no adult woman wants to live her life in hiding.
Nor does he - but he thinks the fact he that makes the conscious choice to live his life so privately is mature. Thinks if you were ever to call him, he'd block you. Show you what immature really looks like.
But you never do, so he never will.
Instead, he just scoffs again. "Immature," he mutters, shaking his head as he slouches into his desk chair. It spins ever so gently, Namjoon too irritated to stop it - but then he's facing the sofa and he's right back where he started.
See, Namjoon has been thinking a lot about you lately. It's time to submit his mixtape to the company; time for them to approve it for release. Trouble is, he hasn't been able to work on it since you left. 
You've been in California for eight months. Since last August. Eight fucking months, and he hasn't touched a single thing, because it's all tainted with you. Stained. Ruined. 
It's your favourite classical symphony sampled beneath the opening track; your lyrical suggestion in the bridge of his third track; your name he wordplays into obscurity on his fifth track. No one would ever be able to decipher it. It's just for him.
A little bit of you preserved forevermore; from a time when you were still his.
Kind of like the folder his mouse is hovering over. 
It's password protected. Called 'drafts'. Looks inconspicuous. Just another plain folder icon. Nothing interesting. At least, it looks that way. 
He can't bring himself to get rid of it - and yet the tick... tick... tick... of his metronome becomes the click-click-click of his mouse as he follows the electronic pathway back to you.  
Namjoon enters the password. Knows he shouldn't. Knows he should also change the password, because typing in your birthday is fucking painful at this point.  
There are six files in the folder. Voice notes. Audio files marked with dates and time stamps of last summer. 
Above anything, he knows he shouldn't press play.
But he's 'immature'. Of course he'll do what he shouldn't - or at least that's how the voice in his head taunts him as he presses down on the play icon.
"Is it going?" Your voice echoes into the room. You giggle. Namjoon hears himself confirm that it is. He can picture it now. Remembers the shirt of his you'd been wearing after he'd snuck you into the company building. Knows exactly which part of his studio sofa you'd been on. "Okay, okay. Cool. What do you want me to do?"
"Just speak."
His voice sounds tender. Far softer than it does these days. He thinks he's grown since back then. Thinks he's matured. Thinks maybe if you'd have met him now, instead of then, perhaps it would have lasted.
"About what?" You had said with a laugh, and Namjoon finds himself burying his head in his hands at his desk.
"Anything. Everything. Your mind fascinates me, gorgeous."
"You're the one with genius-level, IQ," you had fondly teased him. "No one more fascinating than you. Did you really have to wear those sweats, though? You know they turn my mind to jelly."
"I can take them off, if it'll help."
"Keep them on," your voice had lowered. In the studio, Namjoon groans into his hands. Knows what's coming next. "Wanna see how much of a mess I make when I ride your-"
His nimble fingers race to the space bar, pausing the audio clip. Has listened to it enough times to know exactly what happens afterwards. 
It's not like he needs the recording to remember. He remembers it all. 
Remembers the semi he'd had at the time, and how the way you'd looked at him had him growing to full stiffness. Remembers the way you'd carried on talking nonsense when you were straddled across his thigh; and the way the conversation had dissolved into you being incredibly vocal about exactly what you wanted him to do with you. To you. For you.
And so it had become a goal: he'd been after the perfect moan to hide deep within the layers of his closing track. Would record you every now and again in the midst of a fuck. Would tell you how good you sound, how much he wants the world to hear you. Would say shit like 'you've got a voice that'll ruin lives, gorgeous,' or something about Augustine, and how he'd have never converted to celibacy if he'd have met you. Would whine along with you, and thank the lucky stars his apartment spanned over two floors - his poor neighbours probably would have complained, otherwise. 
He puffs out his cheeks and sighs. Tilts his head back against the top of his chair, and lets his hand fall to his crotch. He palms it slightly; firm from the thoughts of your clammy body sticking to his, and the musky scent that he wished he could have bottled up for times like these.
"Get a grip," he berates himself, and spins back to the desk. He needs to get his feelings out. Speak them into existence. Admit that he misses you, and that he's been a bit of a mess since you've been gone. His mental block isn't going away anytime soon, so he may as well try a little honesty in its place. 
He opens up the software for the mic that he keeps on his desk for rough recordings, and clicks on the red circle. Kind of feels kind of like a stop sign to him.
"Stop what?" he questions into the void. "Thinking about her? Avoiding her favourite coffee shop, even though it was mine too? Wasting all this fucking space in my brain like it's a storage unit for memories of her? I don't want them. I don't need them. Why can't I let them go? Why is she still in my head? And why am I scared of the day she won't be?"
He rambles and he rambles. Cries not once but four times.  Goes on and on about why you're the fucking worst, and then he spirals into how much he loves the way you laugh, and how he's never felt anything better than your arms wrapped around his waist. Gushes about how committed you are to your work, and how much he's in awe of the way you prioritise yourself. Is proud when he mentions your achievements; is pissed off when he mentions the little quirks of yours he didn't love.
They're lies, of course. He loved everything you did - but it makes him feel better to feign hatred.
Makes him feel like it was his choice. Like he's the one who left. 
He's pulled from his thoughts when his phone begins to ring. It's on loud, so he lets it ring for a bit. Knows it could sound good on the recording. He reaches over for his phone and rubs his spare hand over his face to psyche himself up. 
It's probably just Yoongi, he thinks, like it normally is, wondering if he's at the office building. He doesn't check the caller ID - just answers it and automatically switches to speakerphone. 
"Wassup?" He says into the receiver, far chirpier than he was during his rant. He's still a little dry, but he's performing now. Pretending like everything is fine.
There's a moment of silence. Namjoon's eyes flick to his phone screen. Checks the caller ID. Blood runs cold.
And then, there's a 'hey.' 
Namjoon is the silent one, now. Doesn't know what to fucking say - and thankfully, you hate empty spaces in conversations. 
So you fill it. 
"I quit my job," you tell him. 
Why you think he would care is beyond him.
But the last he knew, you loved your job. Something feels... uneasy within him. He remains silent. Lets you speak.
"There's a red-eye flight that leaves in four hours. LA to Seoul. I know it's..." You cut yourself off, struggling to find the right words to say. "Look, I know it's been eight months, and I know it's been rough. I thought I could do this whole 'life' thing without you, Nam, but... Fuck. I don't think I can. I... I think maybe I was the one who needed to mature. I know I put you through hell, but if I get on that flight, will you be there at the other end?"
It's a simple question, really - yes or no - yet it feels so much heavier than that. Feels like commitment. Feels like something he isn't ready for. Feels like something you rescinded your right to a long fucking time ago.
And so Namjoon laughs. It's cold. Is guaranteed to make you cry. He doesn't care.
"No."
The call ends, his finger forcefully tapping on the red button of his phone. He knows it'll hurt. Thinks 'good'. Reckons you deserve it. 
But then he's scrambling; dialling your number back, holding his phone to ear, stomach in his throat, heart in tatters, swallowing back tears that threaten to fall on his part. 
Being a cunt was much less satisfying than he thought it would be. In fact, if anything, it makes him feel even fucking worse. 
All he wants is to see you. It's the only thing he wants.
You take a while to answer. He was right. It did make you cry. Mainly because you know you do deserve it. 
There's no 'hello' when you answer. You say sorry, instead. "It was out of line for me to ask."
"Yeah," he says. "Kinda was."
"I just... I had to know. Eight months is a long time, isn't it? It's really fucking long."
Namjoon pauses. Bites down on his lip as it shakes. Sighs. "The flight... when does it land?"
"Nine-thirty."
"A.M.?"
"Yes."
"Into Incheon?"
"Uh-huh."
He can hear the tears you're fighting. Wonders if you can hear his. 
"Get the flight," he finally says. "I'll meet you there."
"Wait... are you sur-"
He doesn't let you finish. He's had eight months of fucking torture without you. Eight months to think about all the things he wishes he could have done differently, eight months to play scenarios in his head. Eight months. 
He can't go through it again. Can't be without you. It's too fucking hard. 
"Get your ass on that flight," he says, stern in his tone. 
"It's one-way," you warn him.
And even though you can't see him, you know there's a dimple in his cheek. Know he's smiling. Know it feels like a weight has lifted from his chest, because it feels that way for you, too.
"It better fucking be."
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julieeeeette · 1 year ago
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the one where Namjoon thinks she's beautiful
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Pairing: Namjoon and original female character
Word Count: 253
Rating: PG-13
She was positively the most beautiful woman in the whole world. And she was his.
He tucked a hand into his pants picket and watched with a small smile playing on his lips as she threw her head back, her inky hair shimmering like a wave down her back as she clapped her long, slender hands.
After all the serious paintings they'd seen, this one of a small girl holding a fish and a cat plucked the strings of her humor and ignited her in a bright laughter that filled the empty hall.
"The cat!" She held her arm to mimic the cat and rolled her eyes with a meow. "It… it jus….!"
Her words trailed off as tears ran down her cheeks, glinting in the bright lights. 
He chuckled to himself as she stepped under a recessed light and was illuminated as though she were on display in her effortlessly elegant black gown that hung down to the ground. She patted her eyes as she caught her breath and sighed when she looked at him.
"Sorry. I don't know why that was so funny."
"You're beautiful."
"Oh." She dipped her head with a shy smile filling her cheeks and squishing her cheeks as she smoothed her dress down, her engagement ring glimmering in the light, blinding him for a moment. "Thank you, Namjoon. You're very handsome. I like glasses on you."
He smirked at her and walked towards her, wrapping an arm around her waist before ushering her into the next hall.
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liwaywaydreamer · 2 years ago
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My Savior (Ch. 1)
(Time travel au, Royalty au, BTS x Reader)
Synopsis: As a hopeless med student that has been accustomed to the roller coaster of mishaps in life, you were sure nothing could get worse than the current situation you’re in. Unfortunately, that thought didn’t include being transported back in the 1400s, nor did it include you being an apparent reincarnation of the person you hated most. Now, can this get any worst?
Pairing: BTS x reader
Warnings: Inaccurate history, angst, bystander effect, verbal abuse (reader received some insults and humiliated), harmful thoughts, implied politics (in connection only to the story, there are no real politician mentioned here), corruption in politics, unreliable narrator (if I forgot something, feel free to comment or send an ask?)
A/n: university life is shit and I was eyeing for this to be at 5k words but if I stuck to that, I wouldn’t finish this. If you like it, please reblog. Reblogs are worth more than likes here right?
Masterlist
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Chapter 1: Like fate, like destiny
You're fucked.
Two words you continuously repeat in your head as you struggle to gather the mess of thesis papers you've left messily across your table the night before. Glancing at your alarm clock not surprisingly on the floor blaring 10:30 at you, sporting a dent not so hidden even if you're three feet away, (a surprising quality for such a cheap thing).
Your class starts at 8.
You tried your best to get to your university as quickly as you can, wishing time would stop a little, or even just go back, afraid of what is about to come. Despite your efforts not to get annoyed (and failing miserably) with the bodies you bumped into on the way and the occasional yelling here and there — from the moment you almost forgot to pay the bus fare to when you're facing your professor right now in front of the faculty lounge, the same professor which you needed to pass your research to— coffee splashed onto his shirt, a cup on the floor, and you on the receiving end of his anger.
He took off his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose, a gesture that you might have found endearing if he had been more physically appealing. You waited with bated breath, so used to his antics. Although some might see this as an attempt for him to control his anger, you however can see past his huge ego and idiotic narcissism, he was only doing this to attract more traction, the audience for your humiliation.
His prolonged sigh was your calm before the storm.
"You can't do anything right, do you?" he sneered as if trying to prove a point to the spectators, relishing in every second of your embarrassment. 
If being a disappointment was a job, you'll be the CEO in no time.
"Sir, I'm really sorry, I didn't mean—"
"SHUT UP!" he screamed as he loosens his necktie. You can't do anything but wait and hope that whatever he does next would suffice for how much you've messed up time and time again.
"You, what can you do right?" With each word, he poked and prodded you, pushing you closer and closer to the deep end. You whimpered, trying to not lose control but failing miserably as there was nothing that you could do to stop it, and whether you were just failing by your standards or the fact that he does not care, he continued his barrage of insults, never letting up despite your attempts to apologize.
"How long do I need to put up with you?" he slurred as he now prods your shoulder, harder and harder with each word.
"Sir, I'm sor— "
"HUH?!" a smack and you were on the ground. All the people in the vicinity just stood there, watching, unwilling to help— being a mindless watcher to the abuse, the true definition of a bystander effect.
Why is it in every discipline, violence needs to be included? Is that how we're programmed to learn? Through nothing but violence? You hoped for someone to help you even if you already knew that no one would. Yet, you hoped still.
If this was your first day in school, you would've fought back. You would've stood up for your pride. That a spilled coffee is not enough to humiliate you like this and that not every misfortune is because of you. But you know better; this isn't your first day, nor is it your second. You know how the system works and who it favors, and unfortunately, it doesn't favor you.
"...waste of space. If it weren't for your parents..." You didn't hear the other words he spoke as he walked away not forgetting to throw the papers he held— papers that were your best effort at reaching your dreams, thrown away with your hopes of being better than what they said.
Needless to say, you were suspended due to behavior misconduct; words that you no longer know the meaning of anymore. You're back to your cage-like rented dorm, whilst your head is everywhere but.
What a cruel joke, you thought. The first time you wanted something so badly for yourself and had dedicated your whole life to had to happen with the world's hatred for you was at its peak. Or had it ever really stopped?
You gripped the handle of your balisong, tracing the delicate and intricate designs you engraved on it as waves of atrocious thoughts crashed into your mind. How morbid, you mused. The same thing that you want to hurt yourself with right now is the same thing that made you feel grounded. You're aware that these thoughts are anything but good, but you're also aware of the fact that no one is going to help you.
Simply because no one wants to.
A medical career was not your parents' choice nor was it ever in their choice, but it was in yours.
You're not unconscious of the fact that a career in the medical field is a lot to take financially, and to be the only one in the medical field in a family of lawyers? You alone destroyed the dreams put on you by your mother who vicariously lived through you, but you wanted it.
And you thought that was enough.
But now, as you sit back on the barren floor of your sparsely furnished room that you once hoped would've at least shown evidence of the life of someone healthy in their early twenties, you had nothing other than your worn-out bed on the corner and a circular dinner table doubling as your makeshift desk, cut off from all financial stability that your parents could've provided you if you only heed to their wishes. Now, you think about whether your current situation is worth the sense of independence you fought so hard for.
Was it a foolish decision to stand your ground? To try to live your life on your own terms? Because you know for a fact that it doesn't matter if you followed every whim of your parents as they will always find something wrong and below their standards with you. With every breath, every change of clothes, every food that you intake, even your education— you were taught that everything that they have given you was a debt you owed them, and because of that they are within their rights to choose for you.
After all, parents only want the best for their children, don't they?
You are by no means the most intelligent person on the campus, nor were you trying to be. But you're committed to what you chose, and you hoped that that commitment can be seen through your effort and hard work. And yet, despite your commitment, those words, those words still echoed in your mind— you can't seem to un-hear those words.
“If it weren't for your parents.”
You wanted to choose a life separate from them, to forge a path of your own. But no matter how much it pains you to admit, you know now, clearer than ever, that it does not matter how far you run, you'd always be hidden beneath their shadows.
To only be recognized as the black sheep of your family.
Instead of indulging your self-pity and sulking alone in your room with a blade on sight much longer than you had intended to, you opt to browse the internet for some fun things to do; a piece of advice you got from the internet since seeing a psychiatrist would be a luxury for you.
And whether it was your misfortune running out finally or yet another adventure of mishaps waiting to unfold an announcement caught your attention:
"Join us for a free tour down the historical lane to commemorate the House of Kim, with events set to reenact the life our ancestors had lived!"
There were more words to the article but as you read on, your eyes fell on the tour's schedule.
"Gyeongbokgung tour is going to take place at 1:30 pm," you murmured to yourself.
It was an opportunity you couldn't miss, a rare sight to see. Despite the mental baggage weighing you down, this was a chance to experience something new and forget about your troubles, even if just for a little while. Maybe this was the way of the gods trying to make up for all the shit storm your life is at right now, but whatever it was, you'll take it.
So, without hesitation, you got up, grabbed your purse, and with the little money you have left, you headed out. You knew you had to take on more shifts at the store or find other jobs to cover for your sudden trip, as your dream of becoming a doctor was fading quickly and surely anyway. But for now, all you cared about was the prospect of exploring a historical place that had opened its doors on a day it usually wouldn't.
Arguably, no one other than yourself knows what decisions made on a whim can do to anyone. Whether this is your intuition telling you to go back to your room to help you or just to spite you away from society, you didn't dwell long on the thought.
All you needed to know is that you're drowning quickly, and you would hold unto anything, even a pair of gilded chains to let you breathe again.
"Gyeongbokgung Palace, also known as Gyeongbok Palace, was the primary royal residence and the largest of the five grand palaces that still exist today in South Korea. Built-in 1395, this..."
As you don't have a lot of money to waste, you stuck to the free guides the palace provides although not very effective when you're standing in the back of 50 people. And looking at how detached and uninterested your tour guide is whilst speaking, without a doubt, you knew that this was just an additional job to her. Not really enough to complain about since the constant chattering of the people around you easily engulf her almost robotic voice anyways.
This trip already cost you more than you expected and standing still to nonsense chatter was not part of your nonexistent plan. So, with the palace map in hand, you left the group with ease.
"Gwanghwamun: the southern gate that became the main gate after some time. It is one of Seoul's iconic sights, having been restored after being largely destroyed by the war," you read while gazing up at the magnificent building in front of you, the swaying of windchimes singing their lullabies in the background. Your eyes carefully scanned every nook and cranny, not wanting to forget this beautiful sight. Although you can't be sure if the scenery is exactly as it looked when it was originally built, the idea of having remnants of the past soothes your soul.
You've always been intrigued about the things that have already happened, or perhaps that's an understatement as your mind always seems to be occupied with thoughts about what they could have done differently and the effects of it on the modern world. Whether it really is fascinating to you or just a form of escapism, you don't want to know. All you do know is that you're a product of the modern world, but something within you suggests that itself was a mistake.
Especially when the Kim dynasty has the best-looking aristocrats you had ever seen.
No, you weren't attracted to them, you tried to defend yourself from your inner turmoil as you gaze upon the paintings displayed. You just know how to appreciate beauty when you see one, even if it's just paintings on a wall. This was once again your Philip Hamilton but with much more injustice. At least with Philip, there were actual pictures of him to bestow the world with his beauty. And although you can commend the talents of the painters of the past considering they did not have the best art supplies during their time, you still cannot grasp the idea that these people existed. Not when they are reduced to the mere splat of colors made to resemble a person.
You couldn't clearly see the features of each man in the paintings, but it's not really anyone's fault for it's just the evidence of time. Nevertheless, your admiration for them never lessened, because it's more than their artificial perfection that deserved your admiration and respect. They were also the ones who did more than any other aristocrats ever did for their people. They were the true embodiment of a regime existing not for the regime itself, perfectly aware of who gave them power. Although yes, it wasn't a democracy, but even democracy has its problems.
All you can say is they did their best to lead their people. At least for some time, as they were the foundation that made South Korea what it is now. Sure, their reign could've ended better, still, they were an integral part of history.
And history should never be forgotten.
Although it disheartens you that their achievements and sacrifices are slowly being forgotten; the wars they've won are now taken for granted, you understand that life goes on and people have their own lives to live. It's another reminder that time doesn't stop for anyone.
As the wind chimes fluttering in the breeze, abruptly ceasing your thoughts. Somehow, you felt a sense of belongingness, despite their faintness that could easily be muffled by the chirping of birds. Nonetheless, it was truly fitting for the place as it only elevated the experience the palace could only give.
You couldn't quite understand why wind chimes would be placed in Geunjeongjeon, other than to elevate the experience, but since the cold breeze was constant ever since you stepped onto the palace grounds, you're certain that the people who are in charge knew exactly what they're doing.
You continued observing the place, trying to imagine what events had happened on the concrete that was paved hundreds of years ago. Was it quiet? Were the roads bustling with people constantly? Or were there just only a handful of people seen from time to time walking along?
You were so deep into your imagination that for a few seconds, you felt as though you were transported back in time. You were seeing groups of three to four consorts walking and talking to each other, palace women walking briskly with a basket on their sides, and a few eunuchs scolding some servants who probably messed something up. And then suddenly, everything came to halt when a booming voice from behind you commanded, "Make way for the Prince!"
As you turned to face the source of the voice, you found yourself making eye contact with a man whose attire you could easily recognize from the K-dramas you'd watched, and even with the distance between you, you can't help but feel he was looking straight at you.
"Excuse me, is this yours?" A little girl's voice interrupted your daydream, her voice so cute as she lightly tugs your shirt, holding out your phone.
"Oh, thank you so much!" you exclaimed, realizing that you were in your head so much that you didn't feel your phone fall off your pocket. You would have another problem added to your bulk of problems if it weren't for the girl.
"No problem, have a good day!" she gleamed brightly and ran off. The kid was so energetic you couldn't even give her something back. 
As you opened your map once again, you accidentally dropped your phone and with it, you see a pocket watch on the ground. And it didn't take you to think twice to know to whom it belongs. Hurriedly, you followed the kid toward the path of the Hyangwonjeong pavilion.
"Where did she go?" you murmured, you were sure that you had seen her walking towards the pavilion, but as you see the bare grounds of the place, you realized you had lost track of her. The pavilion was nearly empty except for a few tourists, and you felt torn between searching for the girl to return the watch or continuing to explore the palace grounds.
As you were going to turn around and try to find the girl, you stopped in your tracks. After all, did you really spend your money to travel here just to end up focusing on returning a girl's missing watch when the palace was only open for a limited time? It would be a waste of time going here if you didn't enjoy your time, right? As you stood there contemplating your decision, the constant breeze grew stronger, making the wind chimes nearby flutter and although messy, they still somehow created the most beautiful melodies. The sound disrupted your thoughts, but somehow provided an answer to your dilemma. You decided to keep the watch and continue exploring the palace. After all, you didn't want to waste your money and time searching for someone who would likely be enjoying the sights with her guardians. You could always return the watch to her later.
As you stroll on the bridge named Chwihyanggyo, your fingers lightly tapping the railings, you thought of one thing that could make this experience a million percent better.
"Why are hanbok so fucking expensive?" you huffed, frustrated at yourself for not being able to afford one. But since you can't do anything about it, you continued walking with a pout toward the buildings that housed the aristocrats of the past. The melodies of the windchimes grow louder as you come closer. And that's when it hits you.
How do you keep hearing them considering you haven't seen one since your first step on the palace? If this was a scene in a drama, you would've thought that the windchimes were following you, serving as the background music for the main protagonist's introduction. But this was no drama nor were you a main protagonist material, and you couldn't help but feel curious about it.
As you stepped inside the pavilion, you felt like you were slowly reaching your dream of going back in time as you gaze at the antique furniture that filled the place. Your fingers trailed the rough edges of the desk, which had subtle engravings that seemed unreadable at first glance: 다 괜찮을거야.
Everything will be alright.
The phrase repeated in your head as you wondered what it meant. Was it a message from the past or just a meaningless inscription? You felt a sense of longing to uncover the mystery behind it, and you wouldn't have noticed it if you hadn't felt it, but the pavilion was closing soon, and you had to leave to look around more. 
As you were about to exit, the chimes called out to you again, tempting you to get closer and follow their sweet melody— almost as if they could sense the curiosity in your mind. You followed the sound until you stumbled upon a backroom, which looked like a storage room that had been converted into a makeshift bedroom for the caretaker. You stepped across the redline, both figuratively and literally, unable to resist the urge to explore further.
From the balcony, you caught a glimpse of the wind chimes dangling from a branch over the lake. The constant ringing didn't falter from luring you in. You scanned the area for anyone who could catch you and when you saw no one, you leaped over the balcony and headed toward the chimes. There was something about the chimes that piqued your interest, but whether it was the chimes themselves or the confusion of how you keep hearing them from afar, you weren't sure, and nor were you going to find your answer.
Because as the popular idiom goes, curiosity killed the cat, and with a slip up your feet into the lake you go.
♛♛♛♛♛♛♛
The row of daisies sat atop the windowsill, bathed in the golden light of daybreak. The silent whims of the wind filled the space, stirring the dried leaves on the small makeshift table below, made with old planks with jagged edges, where jars of medicines sat alongside a worn notebook filled with hastily scribbled notes. There was the usual sound of footsteps and the creaking of floorboards. The palace's physicians and attendants began to trickle in, their visits indicated by the soft chimes of wind chimes hanging above the door.
And the wind blew one more time. As if it's intentionally done to send a message as the image of blurred sketches comes through.
All was well.
Until the peaceful scene was shattered by the thunderous galloping of horses that had shaken the rooms. Until there was the clash of metal on metal that filled the air as swords were unsheathed. And until there were faces with features you couldn't make up.
Muffling, shuffling, screaming, shouting.
It was only chaos and bloodshed, and as it worsened, the ringing in your ears grew louder and louder, drowning out all other sounds and leaving you with nothing but a sense of overwhelming disorientation.
Then, just as suddenly, it all heeds to a stop. The ringing faded away, and nothing could be heard other than the flipping of the pages, the smooth gliding of a pen, and the wind chimes outside the window that began to tinkle once again. You looked out the window and saw a tranquil scene: rows of green grass and golden hay, and the majestic curve of a mountain in the distance. There were no whims nor whispers of the wind.
All was quiet and still.
As if everything was at its stalemate; the equilibrium.
And then, as if a stick had been broken, it happened.
The scene began to shift and blur, colors and shapes warping and twisting like a nightmare. The ground trembled beneath your feet; the tremors so strong that you could've sworn you felt it all as images flickered before your eyes. You saw a crowd of men gathered around someone lying on the cold hard floor with colors ranging from black to white, their sorrows crystal-clear even with the constant ringing. Then you saw a field of yellow flowers, a scenery of green and gray with men running toward something in the distance, their faces twisted in anguish, kneeling and begging in the middle of a field.
The images kept shifting and switching back and forth. Everything was in chaos as if fate itself was unsure of what was to come. But through it all, you struggled to hold onto each fleeting image, desperate to make sense of the chaos that surrounded you. And then, with a sudden jolt, you were pulled back into reality, coughing up water as you gasped for air. As you opened your eyes, the last remnants of the dream slipped away, and you were left with only the memory of the intense emotions it had stirred within you.
Dazed, and confused. You looked up, meeting the gaze of the man who had pulled you from the water, his eyes filled with concern and relief.
You were certain you hadn't met him before, but you could've sworn that those almond-shaped eyes were something you could never forget, etched into your memory with an inexplicable familiarity.
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To be continued...
Thanks for reading!
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dearestvante · 1 year ago
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stuck with you; kth.
pairing: taehyung x fem!reader , namjoon x fem!reader genre: non-idol au, exes to lovers (?), roommates au, angst, smut, fluff (??idk), miniseries warnings: short chapters, lowercase writing, swearing, kinda toxic relationship, unrequited love, fear of commitment, use of petnames (baby & honey), tae is a menace and an asshole but that’s cause he loves you and you’re with someone else right in front of him + more added later preview: "taehyung was standing in the kitchen, ready to enjoy his bowl of jjajjangmyeon, when your bedroom door opened, revealing you and your boyfriend, hand in hand, smiling at each other. safe to say, he lost his appetite very quickly. to clear any misunderstandings, you weren’t the problem. your angelic smile that turned his whole world upside down wasn’t it either. the buff, six-feet-tall man on your right, and the fact that he was the cause of your joy, that was the problem. he hated namjoon with every little cell in his body. not because he was such a bad person - he was quite the opposite, actually, which made taehyung hate him even more - but because he had you."
parts: one; two; three.
[listening to layover while reading is advised ;)) ]
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hyunnows · 1 year ago
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WHO YOU GONNA CALL | M.LIST
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A series of tapes describing Namjoon's life since joining the Supernatural Investigation Unit.
PAIRING(S) | Namjoon x reader
THEMES | cop!au, x-files!au, ghostbusters!au, cop!Namjoon, cop!reader, youtuber!Seokjin, youtuber!Taehyung, ghosts, conspiracies, cryptids, the paranormal, and the supernatural are main subjects
RATING | pg13
SERIES/BTS TAGLIST: @imbonibi @fangirl125reader @geniejunn @akshreads @6-ucci @mickmoon @betysotelo18 @hgema
Navigation | Taglist
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PARTS: Tape #1 | Tape #2 | Tape #3 | Tape #4 | +
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PREVIEW
“The X-Files, the damn X-Files,” Namjoon mutters to himself, reclipping his tie to his shirt–he wasn’t a real detective yet, he didn’t need to look like one yet either. 
He takes slow, dragging steps towards the door in the corner of the precinct. He dreads opening the door, his distaste increasing when he hears the loud shuffling of papers and quiet rock music barely making it past the door. Fuck it. 
He swings the door open to be met with complete and utter chaos. The office is far past disorganized. There are files everywhere, tapes, cameras, and photographs all placed haphazardly across both wooden desks. He cringes when he notices the boxes filled with the same materials stacked all around the room. Not to mention the overflowing drawers with papers practically falling out of them.
The sound of papers being tugged out of a drawer catches his attention, the cacophony leading him to see a figure slumped over a file cabinet, sipping hot chocolate from a ‘repurposed’ ramen styrofoam cup. Awkwardly, he clears his throat. “Hello?”
You snap to look at him, a distressed looking uniform hanging from your figure. Swallowing the coco in your mouth, you greet him excitedly, “Oh, hi there. You must be Namjoon, right? My new partner?”
Not for long, he thinks to himself, before nodding. “That would be me. You’re [Y/N], right?”
“Yes I am. Are you excited to be in the SIU?”
“Not really, I’m sort of a skeptic, to be honest. Ghosts and cryptids and all that aren’t really my thing, I prefer science,” Namjoon says, eyes wandering the towers of paperwork.
You scrunch your face at the slight bit of arrogance in his tone, but shrug it off. “Oh, can’t relate. Personally, I’m a believer. You spend a while here and you might become one as well.”
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Navigation | Taglist
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ggukzashi · 2 years ago
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Black Pearl Pt. 2
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Pairing: Namjoon × reader ft. Ot7
Rating: Adult, Explicit
Genre:NonIdolAu,BodyguardAu,Angst,Smut,Fluff
Word Count: 1.9k
Summary: You're with your friends drinking when suddenly your entire life is flipped around. You find yourself trapped in a house with 7 men you don't know and their Alpha gets on your nerves a little too much. What do you do when you realize that you like their leader and you're not supposed to? Can you resist giving in and sticking to your belief of no relationships or do you give in to the temptation?
Warnings ⚠️: Cursing
Author's Note: I decided to write this series inspired by Namjoon in a black turtleneck ( yes I'm weak and I know y'all are too). It's my first time writing a series so please do let me know your thoughts and engage with the post.
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Chapter Two
“Namjoon.”
It almost feels like an instant reaction, the way it rolls off of your tongue so easily. Almost like it’s a name you’ve known for a while. Your thoughts are interrupted when you hear your phone ringing. You pull it out of your purse that you managed to grab before you had to leave the club. Before you get the chance to answer, Namjoon grabs it out of your hand harshly.
“What the fuck?” You yell.
“Give me my phone back,” you demand, your hands crossed against your chest. Namjoon quickly pulls the car over and slides the SIM card out of your phone before throwing it out of the window. Your eyes shoot open at his action. You're about to yell at him again when you hear a gunshot in the distance.
"Sit back," Namjoon orders in a voice that leaves no place for argument, as he presses on the accelerator and speeds away from the location. He reaches his arm to the back seat with ease and retracts his walkie-talkie.
"How the fuck are they trailing us?” He asks and you can hear another voice answer through the mic.
"They must have pinged her phone location hyung."
"I just destroyed the SIM card,” he groans out in frustration.
You turn around and see a black car right behind you. Your heartbeat picks up its pace immediately and your eyes widen. "Namjoon, they're right behind us,” you cry out, your eyes fixated on the car trailing right behind you.
"I'm on it. Don’t worry," he says and before you know it, you're in a chase with the car behind you. Namjoon quickly maneuvers his own vehicle into a small lane nearby and follows along an internal route. You manage to lose the car and catch your breath as you're back on the road.
"We lost them, right?" You ask nervously and Namjoon turns his head to look at you.
"Why the fuck didn't you tell me you had your phone?” He says, instead of answering your question. “Do you even know how dangerous of a situation you're in right now? They probably would be still right behind us had I not found out about your phone,” he yells as you purse your lips together with a sniffle escaping your lips.
There’s an unspoken tension in the air surrounding you. If it was anyone else, you’d have yelled back but there’s something about him. An aura of dominance exudes from him that makes you nervous. You observe how his jaw clenches in anger, his hands gripping the steering wheel tighter, his knuckles turning white. You notice his biceps flexing underneath his black turtleneck as he runs his hands through his jet-black hair.
Goddamn.
You gulp before you shake your thoughts off. The man yelled at you and you’re here drooling. Jeez, get a grip, Y/n.
"I'm here in your car and I don't even know you. I don't know where my friends and family are. I haven't eaten a morsel in the last four hours. I'm drunk and vulnerable and there are a bunch of men with guns after me. You think I'm having any fun here?" You scream back, almost in the same harsh tone, he’s been using since earlier.
For a second you see his gaze soften but you quickly look away and stare out the window, looking at the night sky instead. You aren’t one to take shit from others, especially from one of your dad’s minions and you want to make sure he knows that.
Being tired and hungry, you end up falling asleep.
~the next day~
You wake up to the feeling of sunlight hitting you. Your eyes slowly open, adjusting to the brightness of the room, your head pounding from all the vodka shots. Last night’s events flood through your head and you grunt out in frustration. As you look down, you realize you’re wearing what seems to be a man’s t-shirt.
“Who changed my clothes now?” You whine as you get out of bed and make your way out. As you open the door, more sunlight hits you and you squint your eyes.
“The fuck? Is this Edward Cullen’s house or what?” You question as you follow the staircase and make your way downstairs. Your eyes immediately land on a man leaning against the kitchen counter, his eyes glued to your legs as you walk in further.
“Morning,” he says, his voice sweet and soft. Your eyes land on the way his abs peek through his shirt when he stretches his hands up in the air. You roll your eyes and open the fridge to grab some water.
“Had a rough night I presume,” he speaks again, his tone a little raspier but no less soft. You have a few sips of water and put the bottle back in. The moment you close the fridge, the stranger stands right next to you. You almost yell out loud but his hands are quick to cover your mouth, his eyes staring directly into yours. You notice his lips curve up into a playful smile as he runs his tongue along his bottom lip.
You quickly push him off of you as you hear footsteps. Your eyes dart to the hallway, where Namjoon walks in wearing a pair of blue sweatpants. Only sweatpants. Your jaw drops at the sight of his hard muscular chest and curved abs on display, choking on your own spit. The biceps that you had been eying since you sat in the car with him were now visible to you pretty clearly. As the heat rushes to your cheeks, you notice the way his sweatpants hang low on his hips.
Namjoon looks up at you and the angelic stranger standing at your side, his brows furrowed in confusion. “Morning hyung,” he greets, his voice sounding chirpier than earlier. Namjoon just nods in response before walking away from the situation.
The man turns to you and sticks out his hands. “I’m Jimin. Nice to meet you.”
“I’m Y/n, but I guess you already know that.”
Your eyes dart back to where Namjoon was standing just a few seconds ago and thoughts run through your head. “Hey, meeting in two” You hear a deep voice speak. Your head shoots up as your eyes land on the man in front of you, running his fingers through his long dark curls. You notice the way his eyes scan your body before landing on Jimin standing next to you. His brows knit in confusion as he signals Jimin to move with his eyes.
“Wait” you yell out as Jimin walks over to the dark-haired man. You quickly walk towards them.
“What meeting?” you question, your eyes squinting in confusion. The two men look at each other before the dark-haired man speaks up, “Namjoon hyung called for all 7 of us to assemble to discuss further plans”
“Can I come with?” you ask.
“Well, he told all 7 of us to gather so..” the man’s voice trails off. You roll your eyes at his response.
“Aren’t you all here for MY safety?” you say and Jimin shrugs before responding, “Fair enough. Come along.” As the three of you walk towards one of the rooms in the safe house, you look around admiring the simplicity of the house.
Jimin pushes open the door of a room and you see Namjoon talking to someone over the phone. The other guys seem to be engaged in conversation as you slowly sit down not wanting to draw attention to yourself.
“Why is she here?” Namjoon speaks, his voice coming off deeper than usual. You roll your eyes at his question before responding, “Because I wanted to” crossing your arms, staring down at him. You notice the way his jaw clenches at your snappy response.
“It's only fair we start by introducing ourselves right?” one of the men sitting next to you says. You notice the softer features on his face, his smile bright.
“Jung Hoseok at your service,” he says doing a little bow making you giggle at his actions.
“The name’s Seokjin,” The older one says and the others start chuckling at his introduction. Your eyes dart to namjoon and you notice how at ease he seems with the other guys. His eyes meet yours and a soft smile appears on his face. He fucking smiled. You feel your heart almost skip a beat at the sight of his dimples. You quickly look away and try to focus on the ongoing conversation instead.
“Lol boomer,” the seemingly younger man says giggling as Seokjin glares at him. You notice the way he plays with the ring near the right corner of his lip. “I’m Jungkook. Unlike Jin hyung, if you wanna hang out with the cool people hit me up.” you chuckle at his statement and you hear Hoseok whisper to you.
“You’re about to witness Jin hyung’s iconic rap yelling”
Sure enough, Jin does start yelling, dragging out his words as the younger man throws his head back, everyone laughing. You don’t recognize the smile on your face. It feels so natural to laugh around these people you’ve never even met before. Your mind takes you back to the dinner table at your house, back in Seoul where all you ever experienced was anger, sadness, and silence.
“I’m Taehyung. Nice to meet you” the deep voice of the dark-haired man brings you back to reality. You notice the smile playing on his lips, in complete contrast to his deep, manly voice.
“That’s Yoongi hyung” Hoseok says pointing to one of the men with long black hair, sleeping peacefully.
“Someone willing to volunteer as tribute?” Jimin asks as your brows furrow in confusion.
“I vote for Jimin,” Jungkook says and the others nod in approval. “Why me?” Jimin rolls his eyes before tugging at Yoongi’s hand and yelling into his ears ‘wake up’.
“Fucking hell. Can’t sleep peacefully for one second in this goddamn household full of lunatics.” Yoongi complains as his eyes barely open, still adjusting to the bright lighting of the room.
“Stop complaining cat man,” Jimin says laughing at Yoongi’s half-awake state.
“Now that we’re done with introductions can we get into the important stuff” Namjoon speaks, his dominant leader mode taking control, the softer side completely dissolving into the atmosphere.
He opens up his phone and slides it over to you. You see a tanned man with a scruffy-looking beard. “Do you recognize him?” Namjoon asks and you shake your head.
“As per our intel, he is the one who fired the shots at the club.” You look down again taking a closer look at the man. “I’ve never seen him,” you say shaking your head and Namjoon sighs in response.
“As much as we are here in a safe house, we must be on alert at all times. Never underestimate the enemy” he says and everyone nods in response.
“We also have only three bedrooms and before you all fight to death over being roomies, Jin hyung and I came up with a list of the least chaotic combinations. Jin hyung and Jimin will be in one room. Hobi and Tae can sleep in the living room. Yoongi and Kook will be in one room.”
“Wait where are you and I sleeping?” you ask and the realization hits you that you’re fucked.
You're gonna be sharing a room with Namjoon.
Taglist: @kookznoona @souryoong @gukkie01
Special thanks to @gukkie01 for proposing this idea. Love you ♡.
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youmyjhope · 1 year ago
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hello!! if possible can i please request rough passionate sex w joonie? w lots of squelching and skin slapping sounds please hehe
dis song fire idc who doesnt like it
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emerald-notes · 1 year ago
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Singularity
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Fandom: BTS
Pairing: Namjoon × Reader
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“Shit!” I huffed out as I had to climb the stairs up to the third floor and my poor lungs wouldn’t want to cooperate as always, “I forgot my water bottle at home again.”
“You can have mine, no problem!” a boy handed me his half filled plastic bottle.
I usually follow one rule while drinking water from other people’s bottles. I ask them if they touch their lips to the bottles opening while drinking and usually refuse to drink from the same bottle if they do.
That day, however, I didn’t have the mind to do that as I straight up uncapped the bottle to finish the whole thing in one go. When I looked up to say ‘thanks’ and ‘sorry’, he was already gone. As it was almost time for the next class, I supposed he hurried to get to his. I remembered the boy’s name to be Namjoon.
Namjoon was a boy I would often see in between classes. Sometimes we would nod, ask when the next class was or simply smile at each other. And then, we’d go our separate ways. I knew him just like that. I didn’t remember ever having a full conversation with him.
I didn’t see him again after that day. But I heard some rumors about him around the campus not long after. He was accused of saying something that sparked controversy. Since I didn’t know him in person I never expressed my opinion on the matter. But I had a lingering wish to meet him again, to return his empty plastic bottle that I still carry in my bag.
That wish came true when I finally saw him again.
He was having lunch at an empty table at the corner of the cafeteria. There was no one around so I walked up to him right away.
“I’m so sorry I could not return your bottle that day!” I had told him.
“What bottle?” He looked at me with genuine confusion.
I took out the said bottle from my bag to put on the table. Namjoon let out a chuckle at its sight. “You wanted to return this?”
“I know, it might not be a huge deal to you. But I literally can’t sleep in peace until I return what I borrow from someone else. Be it a pen or book or whatever.” I explained myself clearly to which Namjoon nodded and took the empty bottle off the table.
“I’ll take it back then.” He said, “Hope it gives you some peace.”
He shook his head slightly and laughed. For some reason, I felt overwhelmed seeing him laugh like that. His eyes completely vanished behind the wrinkles as he laughed. He looked so unreal. I couldn’t make up my mind why I was feeling that way at such a small act of someone I barely knew. But I had a feeling that it was a moment I would never witness again. I felt the need to capture it in a picture so that I could look at it whenever I wanted to.
However, I didn't take his picture that day. Instead I stood there for a while, enjoying the moment as it was. He didn’t invite me to sit next to him. I wished he did.
The next time I heard about Namjoon was from a group of friends talking about college in general. I wasn't minding their gossip until I heard them speak about him.
"Good grades aren't everything, you see!" One of them said, "you need to have a better character to not be kicked out of school like that."
I was shocked to find what happened to Namjoon regarding those rumors. As much as I wanted to interrupt their conversation, I couldn't bring myself to do so. Yet my heart couldn't believe a word of the dirty talks I heard around. Even though I wasn't a friend of his, neither was I an acquaintance, in my heart, I still pictured him as the smiling boy who had helped me at the time I needed it.
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Note: Inspired by a dream...
My Masterlist
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yoonjinsgirl · 1 year ago
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HAPPY JOONIE DAY Y'ALL!!!!🐨💙🌱
It's joon's birthday today!!! And I'm so happy!!! Even though my entire draft got deleted I'm still trying to be happy coz it's joon's birthday and i wanted to be happy!!!!
I've always felt so close to joon since day1, he has always inspired me to love myself, to accept my own feelings rather then declining them, I've had hard times accepting myself, my inner feeling and thoughts, it's always been hard to talk with someone without having the fear to be judged! In so many ways I've found myself similar to joonie like love for reading books, love for art, love for nature, i had truly love visiting museums across my country if i had get chance anyday, i truly would love doing that and love for music ofcourse!!! So in many ways joon seems to be my closest friend but at the same time he truly is the man i want to have in my life! I'm sure no matter who must be our bias, at the end of day no one could literally resist the man namjoon is!!! And my love for him keeps growing by every passing day! On his birthday i wish for his well-being, peace and happiness with good health! HAPPIEST BIRTHDAY JOONIE! I LOVE YOU!💕
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NAMJOON X READER
Summary: Bestfriends to Lovers! Unplanned Love Confession! Namjoon and reader don't live in the same country!!!
Warnings: None, *not necessarily a fic, just a conversation full of comforting eachother and their honest confessions* and maybe tine tiny fluff!
A/N: since it's joons birthday i wanted to post something, so here it is! I haven't unnecessarily added anything, it's almost what joon had conveyed through his letter for us!💕
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we were always meant to be destiny!
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As i said before for joon's birthday i really wanted to post something, and yesterday when i read his letter i was so touched by his love…his sincerity and honesty, that i ened up crying over!!! So that's why i wrote this text conversation to something that i feel all of us could relate.♡
About the fic that i had said, that I've been working on, I'll post soon.. within a day or two, and most probably it will be a mini series, so please look forward to it!💜
AND AS I ALWAYS SAY, YOUR FEEDBACKS AND REQUEST ARE TRULY WELCOMED!!!💕
Click to check out my other works: Masterlist💌
AGAIN EVERYONE HAPPY JOONIE DAY 💙🌱🐨
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foxymoxynoona · 2 years ago
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HAPPY BTS FIC WRITING ANNIVERSARY!!!! thank u so much sharing your incredible writing FOR FREE. FOR. FREE. I CAN NOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH: YOU WILLINGLY SHARE YOUR WRITING WITH US. FOR. FREE. AND YOUR FICS ARE LIKE LONGER THAN THE LONGEST HARRY POTTER BOOK??? THATS FUCKING CRAZY LIKE I WISH NOT FOR THE FIRST TIME THAT I COULD JUST FORGET SO THAT I COULD GO IN BLIND AND REREAD EVERY SINGLE FIC OF YOURS ALL OVER AGAIN. I WISH I COULD RELIEVE THAT FEELING OF BEING SO FULL OF AWE EACH TIME I READ A SENTENCE. IM SO GLAD YOURE AN ARMY OTHERWISE I WOULD HAVE NEVER FOUND YOU!!!! regarding the drabble request, could you maybe (if you COULD AND WANT TO, PLS DONT FORCE YOURSELF TO WRITE IT IF YOU DONT WANT TO) write a drabble where lily finally calls jk dad for the first time after calling him kookie for so long 🥺 that, or namjoon and sylvie dad-daughter bonding time 🥰 IF THATS NOT TOO MUCH FOR YOU OFC!!!! THANK U SO MUCH FOR THE DRABBLE OFFER ANYWAY!!!!! ILL READ WHATEVER YOU DECIDE TO WRITE EVEN IF NONE OF IT IS FROM MY REQUEST!!!! I LOVE WHATEVER YOU WRITE 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
I've had this beautiful long note in my inbox for so long and I'm excited to finally have a drabble for you! I'll no doubt do some more Jungkook Lily too, but here's Namjoon and Sylvie for you. Thank you so so so much for reading my stories and I'm really all gooey inside that you enjoy them so much!
Bonus thank you to the person who wrote in asking about Namjoon doing origami!
Story: Amended Characters: Namjoon & Sylvie (Namjoon x Gina, Sylvie is Gina's daughter) Length: 2353 CW: some cursing about deadbeat dads :)
Namjoon sat on the couch and looked at Sylvie. Sylvie looked right back at him, but standing, with her arms tucked into the back of her Mirabel dress through an impressive feat of contortion. Namjoon knew who Mirabel was; he’d seen the movie twice and made a point of learning the soundtrack. Coco too. And Moana. And Frozen, back before he knew which Disney movies Sylvie and Diego actually liked. They had not yet been impressed by his knowledge of the lyrics but Gina had made him butcher the Spanish lyrics of ‘Dos Oroguitas’ again for her later and swayed with her arms around his neck and kissed him hard so… yeah, no regrets. It was nice languages came to him relatively easy. He hadn’t told her he was learning Spanish in his spare time yet, not wanting to embarrass himself before he reached a minimum threshold of competency, but obviously that was a thing he needed to do. She spoke Spanish with her kids as much as she did English. Her whole family spoke it as their first language. He wanted to be in her life, so he needed to speak it too.
Now he decided to try it out a little during this afternoon alone with Sylvie for the first time.
“Qué quieres hacer?” he asked her to show off.
Her lips bubbled out with her breath and she tilted her head and scrunched her eyebrows together. Fuck, had he said something wrong? Or did he just sound stupid?
“What are we going to do together, Sylvie?” he asked her. 
“I don’t know,” she giggled. Then tilted her head the other way. “No sé.” Then “Podemos comer dulces?”
“Ok ok, you passed my Spanish,” he laughed. “I don’t speak much yet.”
“Do you have candy in your pocket? Can I have it?”
One time he’d had candy in his pocket when they saw each other while he was in uniform. 
“Sorry, I don’t…”
She didn’t say anything but looked disappointed. Strike one. Namjoon pursed his lips and templed his fingers, elbows on his knees, and waited. One of them had to figure out what they were going to do. They had several hours before Gina and Diego would be home for his afternoon of appointments. Gina was stressed as shit about Diego’s school trouble lately –Diego acting out, doing poorly on his schoolwork, not wanting to do his homework or even read anymore. So off they went to the doctor for something Namjoon hadn’t asked the details about and Namjoon had volunteered to keep Sylvie before Gina could ask Isabella.
Because, hey, he and Gina were kind of a thing now –no, not kind of. A thing. They were a thing. And he needed to impress her kids quick. He didn’t have tons of nieces and nephews running around like Jungkook did to give him that leg up. He didn’t know much about kids at all and suspected they both knew Diego and Sylvie. He felt big and clumsy with kids. He’d felt that way when he was a kid.
“So uh… what do you want to play?” Namjoon asked.
Sylvie just shrugged. 
“Um, you’ve got like… Princess stuff or Legos or–”
“Those are Go’s,” she corrected. “I don’t play Legos.”
“Oh. Ok, well… we could uh…”  He racked his brain, trying to think of what Jungkook mentioned he did with Lily, or what he’d seen Sylvie do when he was over any other time, or any movies he’d seen. “Um… tea party?”
“No,” she said in her little soft voice, a gentle rejection.
“Uh… art?”
A pause, then, “Ok.”
“Ok. What art stuff do we have? I’m not a great artist but maybe you can teach me something…” 
“Anyone can be an artist,” she corrected. “All you have to do is take a crayon and make your mark.”
“Wow.” She went over to get a box from against the wall but he just stared after her for a moment. Had she thought of that on her own? That was fucking profound. “Does your mom say that?”
“No. It’s in that crayon book.”
“What crayon book?”
“You know, the crayon book.” He still didn’t know, but she didn’t clarify further, because apparently he ought to just know what book she was talking about even though he was positive he’d never read a book about crayons in his life. Or, well, recently. When she began to drag the box to the coffee table, he picked it up and set it beside the table and lifted the lid off, peering into a chaotic nest of broken crayons, pipe-cleaners, half used sticker sheets, dry glue sticks, uncapped markers, loose sequins, and colored popsicle sticks.
Sylvie plopped right down and pulled out some paper and crayons. Damn, she was cute, little face bright and happy, loose hair wispy around her face from her long ponytail with a sparkly scrunchie. 
“What are you drawing?”
“Uh….” She paused and looked at the lines she had made, then giggled and whispered shyly, “I don’t know yet.” He wasn’t sure why that had made her shy, but decided to give her some space. She was shy, much shyer than Lily, who saw everyone as a friend she just hadn’t met yet. Each time he was around Sylvie, he felt like it took time for her to warm up to him again. It was faster if Lily and Jungkook were around, like Sylvie just accepted Namjoon was her Jungkook stand-in for the moment.
But he wanted to be more than that to her. Even if the reality of what it took to be more than that for her felt beyond him right now because he couldn’t even figure out how to spend an afternoon with her. What business did he have dating a woman with children when he knew next to nothing?
But he wanted to. He wanted to figure this out. He felt like Gina and Diego and Sylvie were worth it. He got it, why Jungkook had felt like Isabella, Ezra, and Lily were too.
 So he folded his long legs under the coffee table and dug around in the box and pulled a few pieces of paper out to draw on too. In holding it, though, he realized it was a lighter weight, and had pretty designs on each side.
“Oh, this is perfect for origami.”
“I know origami,” Sylvie announced, eyes lighting up. 
“Oh yeah?”
“We do origami in art special at school.”
“What’s art special?”
“Thursday.”
“Ok…” Didn’t answer his question but she seemed to think it did. “Well what do you make?”
“Um…” She blew her lips out unhappily. “Swords.”
“You… make origami swords?”
“Yeah… and a diamond.”
“And a diamond.” He had no fucking clue what she was talking about.
“Here, I can show you!”
“Ok!” Yeah that seemed good. He watched as she started folding up her current paper without even bothering to make it square. “Wait. I need tape.”
“You shouldn’t need tape…”
“Well I do,” she said and sounded so much like her mother it made him laugh. He went to find some tape, but all he could find was packing tape, so he had to fight with the end of it and tear her off small pieces to use and then fight with the end again when it would inevitably cling to itself again.
“You can say bad words. I know not to say them too,” she assured him, either reading his mind or lips.
“Ah… I won’t… it’s better to stop saying bad words, you know?”
“Mami says bad words don’t count if you say them in Spanish so maybe you should learn Spanish.”
“Yo estudio español.” As soon as he said it, he worried it was wrong,even such a basic phrase. She giggled, which could mean either way. 
“Ok do what I do,” she told him. 
He tried. She kept checking his work and telling him he was doing it wrong, but then she’d tell him “very good” probably like her teacher did.  Then she held out the thing she’d made. “Aquì. A diamond” and motioned to his.
“Ahh, yes, hm.” He looked at the two things in his hands. This was not origami. This was paper folded and taped to resemble a crunchy wad roughly in a shape alluding to a diamond. In a way, hers was better, because his looked like it was trying too hard. “It’s really cool. Thanks for teaching me.”
“Do I have to make a sword?”
“No, of course not. Want me to make something?”
“Yes,” she grinned.
“Ok, let’s see…” He looked around for something he could use to crease the paper and settled on a shitty pair of safety scissors. It had been a while since he’d actually made anything with origami and he worried at first he’d need to look up directions which would make it seem a little less cool. But once he started to crease the paper, he felt the directions come back like a video he could watch just by closing his eyes. His fingers remembered –probably because he’d made dozens of these trying to impress a girl in middle school. It had not worked. Resulted in nothing but papercuts and blisters. 
Sylvie leaned close on the table, watching his hands closely. No one ever paid that much attention to anything he was doing, it was really sweet. He kept glancing at her face until he made the final fold and held it out to her.
“It’s a butterfly!” she gasped and held her hands out for it. When he set it in her palm, she cradled it like it was real. 
“It’s pretty, right?”
“It’s so cute!”
“Ok, let’s see, what else do I know how to make…” Namjoon racked his brain as Sylvie leapt up and made the butterfly fly around the room. She was so pleased with it, it made Namjoon feel really good.
“Teach me how to make it!” Sylvie begged, crashing back down and gently putting the butterfly on the table. “She needs a sister and we can make a bed. No, two sisters!”
She was talking to him so much!
“That’s a lot of sisters,” Namjoon laughed. “All right. It’s kinda tricky though so I may have to help you sometimes…”
He thought that might be frustrating for her to need help. Kids were supposed to get impatient if they couldn’t do it themselves, right? But she didn’t mind at all, just leaned around his hands to see when he’d reach forward to assist with the more complicated bends and folds. Her butterfly came out a little wonky but he praised it and she glowed. She chose the paper for his and then they looked up on his phone how to make a box, which he folded while she tore up paper to be the “blankets.”
“Hmmm, should I try to make a bird? It’s pretty hard!”
“You can do it!” Sylvie insisted. “If it gets hard I can help you.”
Ah, she was adorable. She was really cute. Namjoon watched her smile to herself and arrange the trio of butterfly sisters carefully in their new little bed and couldn’t fathom how a father could just walk away from this little girl. That’s what the fucker had done! Gina had minced no words when, in response to Namjoon asking her on a date, she had said, “I already picked the wrong dad for my babies and now they’ve got a basket of abandonment issues. They already know you. I know no guy wants to hear it, but I can’t date you unless we figure out fast if we’re serious about it, because they don’t need another guy tossing a wave over his fucking shoulder at them.”
And Namjoon had straightened his shoulders and looked her in the eye and said, “I debated it a long time before I asked because of that. You deserve better than that, they deserve better than that. You tell me what the best thing is to do for them, and for you, but… yeah. I’m serious about this. I mean it.”
And so they were a thing, even though they’d only been on a few dates, and Namjoon was doing his best to earn the warmth he felt in his chest every time her kids played with him or asked for help with something or hung off his arms to see if he could still walk or just shouted and waved, “Hi, Joon! Bye, Joon!” Always Joon. 
The crane hadn’t turned out great but Sylvie loved it. She loved the frog too, even though he had to find instructions on his phone. He made it with daisy paper and Sylvie squealed with more glee than he’d ever heard from her. She loved his shitty frog, his lopsided crane, the butterflies. And it was soothing to make, too. Something about the focus on such a small task, the dexterity required, the smoothing and folding and pressing, the doubting it until it finally came together, it was all very calming. 
Maybe that was spending time with Sylvie too though. She was so quiet when her brother wasn’t around; Jungkook said Lily barely stopped to breathe, but it was obvious Sylvie on her own was a gentle soul. She seemed perfectly happy doing this too; he was amazed how long it entertained her. 
“Ok what else can we make…”
“Make a… hm…” Sylvie trailed off staring at the screen as Namjoon scrolled to see what else there were tutorials for. “MAKE A ELEPHANT!” she shouted, pointing at his phone so hard it fell from his hands. Her eyes got wide. “Sorry…” she grimaced.
“Ahh, it looks really hard, but let’s see if we can do it together,” he said. “What paper are we going to use?”
“Pink.”
“Pink it is.” 
Sylvie giggled and snuggled close to his side so their hands could work together and it didn’t matter that the girls in middle school hadn’t been impressed with his origami. It was worth every second to spend this afternoon making Sylvie happy instead. Worth every papercut.
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bangtanficsforyou · 2 years ago
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They Reject You (hyung line)- part three
https://www.patreon.com/posts/they-reject-you-78941459?utm_medium=sharesheet&utm_source=sharesheet&utm_campaign=postshare_creator&utm_content=join_link
If the link doesn't work, click here.
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fentyjjk · 1 year ago
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DISCLAIMER: all rights to me, all works written by me, all ideas credited to me.
do NOT steal, copy, and or translate any of my works.
18+ minors do NOT interact
© fentyjjk
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➸ SONGSPIRATION M.LIST
synposis compilation of varying lengths of drabbles and or series based off of songs i've heard
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KIM SEOKJIN
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╰┈➤MINI SERIES
tba…
╰┈➤SERIES
tba…
╰┈➤ONE-SHOTS
tba…
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MIN YOONGI
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╰┈➤MINI SERIES
tba…
╰┈➤SERIES
tba…
╰┈➤ONE-SHOTS
tba...
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JUNG HOSEOK
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╰┈➤MINI SERIES
tba…
╰┈➤SERIES
tba…
╰┈➤ONE-SHOTS
tba…
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KIM NAMJOON
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╰┈➤MINI SERIES
✧ LOVE ME
genre angst, cheating
synopsis an affair with your husband's best friend leads to a messy confession on your wedding day. it all goes downhill from there.
chapters 1| 2 | on hold.
╰┈➤SERIES
tba…
╰┈➤ONE-SHOTS
✧ TENT FAVORS
synopsis in an attempt to finally ask your fuck buddy to be your boyfriend, you take him camping, your plans are soiled when he brings along his friend, jungkook.
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PARK JIMIN
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╰┈➤MINI SERIES
tba…
╰┈➤SERIES
tba…
╰┈➤ONE-SHOTS
tba…
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KIM TAEHYUNG
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╰┈➤MINI SERIES
tba…
╰┈➤SERIES
tba…
╰┈➤ONE-SHOTS
tba…
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JEON JUNGKOOK
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╰┈➤MINI SERIES
✧ LOVE, LOST
genre angst, heartbreak, cheating
synopsis your relationship with jungkook had been fizzling out for a while. for the last year of your five year relationship, you two had all but floated around each other, but after you catch him cheating that's the final straw.
chapters 1| 2 | completed !
╰┈➤SERIES
✧ DARK ANGEL
genre vampire fic, supernatural, unrealistic historical fic, romance
synopsis after dying and coming back to life as a vampire with an unrelenting thirst for blood, jungkook is on the run. it doesn't matter where he goes or how he just needs to keep running. away from the hunters, away from the people he killed the first night he came back, he just has to keep moving…but then he finds you.
chapters: dark angel navigation | to be continued…
╰┈➤ONE-SHOTS
✧ TENT FAVORS
synopsis in an attempt to finally ask your fuck buddy to be your boyfriend, you take him camping, your plans are soiled when he brings along his friend, jungkook.
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dearestvante · 1 year ago
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stuck with you; kth. | 01.
pairing: taehyung x fem!reader , namjoon x fem!reader genre: non-idol au, exes to lovers (?), roomates au, angst, fluff (??idk), miniseries warnings: short chapters, lowercase writing, swearing, kinda toxic relationship, unrequited love, fear of commitment, use of petnames (baby & honey), tae is a menace and an asshole but that’s cause he loves you and you’re with someone else right in front of him wc: 1k
masterlist.
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your soft giggles fill the room as your boyfriend kisses you all over the face then moves down to your neck, even though he knows how ticklish you are.
“joon, stop, i might hurt you!” you say as your head falls back, against the armrest of the couch, still giggling.
“you could never hurt me, baby” your boyfriend replies, kissing you so gently, sometimes you wonder if he even wants to. you were not used to this softness, kisses with your ex were always so passionate, breathless, even.
nice, here we go again. you’re making out with your boyfriend yet still, you’re thinking about your ex. and his kisses. and the way his long, delicate fingers roamed your body every time he pressed his soft, pink lips on yours.
suddenly the lock on the front door turns and, speak of the devil, the person from your thoughts appears behind it. the scene doesn’t faze either of you, considering you still live together.
you push namjoon away, and sit up on the couch, smoothing out your clothes. your boyfriend does the same, though also throws his arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer to his chest.
“don’t stop for my benefit” taehyung says as he walks through the living room, towards his room, a cocky smile spreading across his face. he always does that. no “sorry for interrupting” or anything, just a childish joke or an insensitive comment, and every time, you wish you would’ve just kicked him out the day you two broke up, instead of letting him stay until he finds a new place. but something inside of you didn’t let you do that.
“why is he still here?” joon asks you, with one eyebrow raised, his jaw tensed. he’s angry, and you can’t exactly blame him.
“cause apartments are not cheap” taehyung answers instead of you, ignoring the fact that he’s not really part of the conversation. “but i don’t expect you to know that, having mommy and daddy resolve everything for you”
namjoon is seconds away from breaking your ex boyfriend’s perfectly sculpted face, you can already see him clenching his fist. yes, he was wealthy - well, his parents were - but he never bragged about it, nor he took everything he got for granted. you knew about his status, because he was your boyfriend, but how did taehyung find out about it was a mystery.
you take namjoon’s hands, rubbing them with your thumbs, comfortingly.
“don’t listen to him, baby” you say, making taehyung scoff and retreat to his room. “he wants to see you pissed off, don’t give him that”
“next time, you’re coming over. i can’t deal with this shit anymore”
“i will. and i’m sorry” you say, lowering your gaze, but he lifts your chin up.
“it’s not your fault that he’s a dick” he claims, and leans closer to kiss you once again. and you’re waiting for those butterflies to finally wake up and cause that sweet feeling in your stomach, but they never show.
taehyung was standing in the kitchen, ready to enjoy his bowl of jjajjangmyeon, when your bedroom door opened, revealing you and your boyfriend, hand in hand, smiling at each other. safe to say, he lost his appetite very quickly. to clear any misunderstandings, you weren’t the problem. your angelic smile that turned his whole world upside down wasn’t it either. the buff, six-feet-tall man on your right, and the fact that he was the cause of your joy, that was the problem. he hated namjoon with every little cell in his body. not because he was such a bad person - he was quite the opposite, actually, which made taehyung hate him even more - but because he had you. he could hold your hand, kiss you, touch you. all the things taehyung couldn’t do anymore. but who’s fault was that, actually?
he turned his back to the two of you, but still kept watching, from the corner of his eye. namjoon talked about something as you walked through the living room, you watching him so attentively, even if it was something you didn’t really understand or cared too much about. the same way you used to look at him, every time he tried to explain to you one of his new projects. eyes glued on him, nodding continuously, always asking questions or sharing your own ideas to show that you care. cause you did, you always cared about him. the memory makes him smile faintly.
“don’t tell me your little prince has a curfew, it’s not even ten pm” he says after you close the door behind namjoon. “damn, maybe living in a luxury apartment for free isn’t all that”
“he doesn’t” you reply, as you walk into the kitchen area, with your arms folded, brows furrowed.
“want some?” taehyung asks, pushing his bowl of ramyeon towards you.
“taehyung, i don’t understand you. you broke up with me, now one minute you act like we’re friends and then in the next, you treat me like i don’t even exist. not to mention your attitude towards my boyfriend…”
taehyung’s jaw tenses cause of that last word, the one he wishes you would never use for anyone else. he doesn’t say anything, mind too blurred to formulate a coherent thought, so he just storms into his room. on his way he can hear your last words and your sigh.
“my point, exactly.”
he’s leaning against the door, aggressively wiping away the stray tears, born from frustration and anger. he’s not angry at you, he could never be. he’s angry at himself, for being a coward, an idiot, for letting you go so easily. he fucked up, badly. you probably hate him by now, and you have every reason to. you should hate him, he thinks, for treating you like this. but at the same time, he can’t help but selfishly hope that someday, somehow you might take him back. he knows he has to fix this, he wants to fix this, but he doesn’t have the courage to do what it takes.
he sits there for a while, like the sad, little boy who’s afraid of his own feelings.
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a/n. hey lovelies! i'm back, with a new fic and im planning on making this one mature, something i've never done before, so bear with me pls and minors stay away!!! anywayss i hope you will enjoy it as much as i did writing it hehe. take care ❤️‍🩹
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namsfuriousphantom · 2 years ago
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Chapters: 1/? Fandom: 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death Relationships: Kim Namjoon | RM/Original Female Character(s), Jeon Jungkook/Park Jimin Characters: Kim Namjoon | RM, Kim Seokjin | Jin, Park Jimin (BTS), Jeon Jungkook, Kim Taehyung | V Additional Tags: Kim Namjoon | RM is Whipped, Kim Namjoon | RM is Bad at Feelings, Boss Kim Namjoon | RM, Doctor Kim Seokjin | Jin, Right Hand Kim Seokjin, Kim Namjoon | RM is a Tease, Major Character Injury, Cute Park Jimin (BTS), Chaotic Jeon Jungkook and Kim Taehyung | V and Park Jimin, Character Death, Forced Marriage (kinda), Kim Seokjin | Jin is Whipped, Attempted Murder, Boss Kim Seokjin | Jin, time doesn't make sense here, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, it's the 20's but it's not, Yandere Kim Namjoon | RM Series: Part 1 of Murder in the Family Summary:
Falling in love with the leader of the most ruthless gang in Seoul was not her plan. Marrying a cold blooded killer was never on her mind. Being hunted...was never on her list. But she was on his.
 Janet Booker was a humble cafe owner before she met Kim Namjoon, the richest man in the city. He made her feel like she was a goddess but one day she discovers a terrible secret he works hard to keep from her. He'll do everything in his power to keep her. Even if that means turning out the lights.
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