#// chipped away at this while I was at work today! this was very fun!!
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Can’t stop thinking about how much Simon “Ghost” Riley loves his American girlfriend.
Unlike the other 141 boys he wouldn’t poke fun at you or tease you about the different words you use. Kyle loves to correct you,
“Whens the soccer game on tonight?”
“Its football love, not soccer, ‘cause you kick the ball.”
“You kick the ball in American football as well.”
“Yeah but...ours is better”
Johnny’s a tease
“Have you seen my swimming suit?”
“You wear a suit to go swimming?”
“I’m not calling it a costume”
“Well it sure as hell isn’t a bloody suit”
Even Price gets in on it by pretending not to hear you,
“Can you grab some chips from the kitchen?”
“Hm? Sorry dear can’t hear ya’”
“Grab me some chips!”
“Gunna’ have'ta repeat that”
“....crisps”
“There ya’ go, really outta speak up more sweetheart”
Never mind the fact he was right beside you on the couch.
But Simon, Simon is different. Never once has he corrected or teased you, to the point where its become a bit of a hindrance.
“Can you stop by the gas station on your way home?”
And he’ll just stare at you, an almost blank expression on his face, only the fidgeting of his fingers give way to what he’s thinking.
“The petrol shop Si’”
“Right.”
Is it because he doesn’t care? Or maybe he’s too frightened he’ll scare you away if he corrects you? Whatever it is he’ll never say, but one thing is for certain, he’s absolutely elated when you start to pick up the British dialect.
You tell people your boyfriend is a leftenant instead of a luitenant and he’s looking at you like you hung the very stars in the sky.
Ask for a “wife beater” while pointing at the bottles of Stella Artois in his fridge and he swears his heart just skipped a beat (despite the crude connotations of the nickname)
Ask him to pick up ‘Maccies for you bolth on the way home and he almost causes a 20 car pileup because he has to hide his burning face.
Tell him you like the black jumper he’s wearing and theres three more in the online cart already.
And when you start swearing like a “proper brit” he’s ready to get down on one knee. He hears you mutter “bloody hell” from across the flat as you listen to news report an expected 10cm of rain for today and for the first time in his life he’s thanking god Manchester is such a dreary place.
You’ve become part of his life, he hadn’t scared you off, you hadn’t gotten tired of him. You wanted to be here, you wanted him. You’ve been here long enough to pick it up, you’ve spent enough time together even your words are beginning to match each other, and theres nothing in the world that could make him happier. So he’ll never once correct you or tease you when you ask to go on a vacation even if he’s blindly nodding along to your requests and scurrying off to the bathroom later to look it up and figure out you wanted to go on holiday with him. Cursing under his breath while he fishes his phone from the sink because he dropped it in his shock at the revelation you wanted to go on holiday with him. Give him two days and he’s already bought the tickets
Sorry for the lack of posting! Schools been getting busy and I'm working on getting a draft of a book ready to send to a publisher so it's been a bit hectic but I absolutely love posting for you guys here on tumblr (srsly all your comments make my day) so I'm going to try and keep posting as regularly as I can! working on a longer chapter for my Ghost and Soap's roomie series rn so that should be out somewhat soon! thank you all so so much for your support.
#simon ghost x reader#simon#simon riley fluff#simon ghost riley x reader#simon riley headcanons#simon ghost riley#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#soap#ghost cod#ghost#ghost x y/n#ghost x you#ghost x oc#ghost x reader#tf 141 headcanons#tf 141 x reader#tf 141 x you#task force 141#cod mw3#cod modern warfare#cod x you#cod x reader#cod x y/n#cod x oc#cod mw2#john price#kyle gaz garrick#john soap mactavish#gaz
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Prompts are out!
plain text and "rules" under the cut
path of hurt:
day 1: gaslighting/hypnosis/brainwashing
day 4: amputation/degloving/vivisection
day 7: waterboarding/drowning/choking
day 10: execution/fake execution/begging for mercy
day 13: drugging/poisoning/cannibalism
day 16: humiliation/dehumanisation/conditioning
day 19: collared/branded/chipped
day 22: captivity/recapture/tearful goodbye
day 25: intimate whumper/sadistic whumper/reluctant whumper
day 28: mind control/body control/betrayal
bonus prompts: forced to watch/whipping/stalked
path of comfort:
day 2: platonic bathing/hair care/make-up
day 5: drunk caretaking/concussed caretaking/feverish caretaking
day 8: reunion/found family/friends
day 11: escape/breaking the conditioning/safe and sound
day 14: toys/gifts/celebration
day 17: forgiveness/grace/resolving a misunderstanding
day 20: homemade meal/quenched thirst/favourite treat
day 23: massage/wiping away tears/gentle touch
day 26: nightmare/warm blanket/snuggling
day 29: singing/first words/inside jokes
bonus prompts: tending to nonhuman whumpee's nonhuman parts/protective caretaker/whumpee wearing caretaker's clothes
secret third path — whumperless whump:
day 3: thunderstorm/blizzard/heat wave
day 6: car accident/plane crash/ship wreck
day 9: hypothermia/overheating/dehydration
day 12: lost/trapped/avalanche
day 15: food poisoning/starvation/throwing up
day 18: apocalypse/infection/self administered medicine
day 21: delirium/vertigo/hallucinations
day 24: animal attack/bear trap/land mine
day 27: migraines/chronic pain/phantom pains
day 30: self-harm/addiction/overdose
bonus prompts: flashbacks/relapse/medical complications
day 31 — bonus day :) write whatever you feel like writing today or have a nice day of rest
AuguSnippets is an event that encourages the short and sweet of the whump genre. Ideally, your drabbles would be under 500 or even under 100 words, maybe even just a dialogue prompt. This, however, does not mean I won't reblog longer prompt fills! Don't stress too much on that limit. I just think it's sometimes nice to challenge yourself to write shorter drabbles, and it can also work as a very good exercise to write daily or semi-daily, and it doesn't need a lot of prep.
As for tagging your work, please use the appropriate trigger warnings. This is so everyone can stay safe and avoid potentially triggering topics while participating. Also, if your work is nsfw, please don't forget to tag it as mature content! If your work is not tagged properly, I won't be able to reblog it! Thank you!
Our special tag will be "#augusnippets day [x]". On the first day that would be "#augusnippets day 1". This is so I and others can find your work easier! You can also tag the blog, that's an even more surefire way to get me to notice your prompt fill :)
Is this a writing only event?
Yeah, this one is exclusively writing focused.
Do I have to use the special tag or tag this blog?
Not if you don't want to get featured on this blog :) It's just so I can find your work easier and reblog it here! If that's not something you're interested in, just scribble away without it.
Is the "under 500" a hard limit for the word count?
No, but I encourage everyone to try and keep to it in the spirit of this event.
Can I submit nsfw works?
Yes! Just please tag it properly :)
Can I mix and match the prompts from different paths?
Yes! Have fun!
What do I need to do to get the completionist badge?
Either you need to complete one whole path, or complete 10 prompt fills altogether while mixing and matching. Those who complete all 30 days (and maybe even the bonus day) will get something extra special!
Can I write fandom related things?
Yes! This event is both for original characters and fandom related writing.
Will there be an AO3 collection?
Yes! Here
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Surprise, Surprise, Greg House
Word Count: 1.1k~
Surprising Greg at work is always fun. Most of the time, he's messing around with the items on his desk until I walk in which ultimately causes him to perk up right away. I'm always happy to see him, and going by the smile that pops up on his face when he first sees me, Greg is happy to see me too. Plus, it always helps that we've been together for several years too.
"House, you have a guest," Wilson states, quickly popping his head into the doorway of Greg's office before popping right back out. Watching him walk back to the elevators, I wave at Wilson before opening Greg's door.
"Surprising," I hear Greg mindlessly mutter before I walk in. Once he sees me, he lightly smiles and changes his words. "Not surprising," He corrects himself, sitting up in his chair. "But pleasant."
"I brought you lunch," I tell him, gesturing to the bag in my hand with a smile. Placing the paper bag on his desk, I sit down in the chair across from him with his desk separating us. "That way you don't have to steal anyone else's."
"You know me so well," Greg chides, placing the magazine in his hands down before opening the bag of food. Taking all of the contents out of the bag reveals two sandwiches and two bags of chips with a bottled drink for each one. "Funny," He notes. "These are the things I would have stolen from Wilson."
Laughing at his sad, yet true comment, I separate everything out and place a Reuben sandwich in front of each of us, Greg already digging into one of the yellow bags of potato chips. "I'm glad I got to come see you today," I confess, the sight of the food making me feel a little sick. "I have some... great news to share."
"Oh, really?" Greg asks, looking up at me. I nod, smiling as he pushes his chair back a little. "Well, then why don't you come over here and tell me all about it?" He suggests with that ever so sly smirk.
Knowing what that means, I gently roll my eyes and stand from my chair before walking over to Greg and sitting on his lap. Instantly, he wraps his arms around me and holds me close, leaning up a little to kiss my lips. This is one of the very few ways Greg shows his love. He always says it's because he gets to hold me closer to him, but I think it's just because I'm sitting on his lap.
"You know," he begins his sentence, nibbling at my neck. "With one simple movement, you instantly have me at your will. How odd is that?" Greg questions me, his voice sultry and low. Smiling at him, I lightly giggle before pushing him away enough so he can look straight at me.
"Greg, I need to tell you something," I state, my voice a bit serious. Even though I'm trying to keep a straight voice without letting my excitement show through, I keep my smile in hopes of him not getting worried. I hope this news finds him well, and it doesn't make him mad or angry... I don't know what I would do if he left me because of it.
Leaning back in his swivel chair to look at me, he continues smiling while running his hand up and down my side. "Go on," he encourages me, his blue eyes staring into mine. "I'm listening, my sweet."
My cheeks slightly blush at the endearment before I look away, sudden nervousness hitting me. "I'm, uh, I'm..." Just as I begin to speak, I choke up before sighing. "I'm pregnant, Greg," I fully answer him, having the guts to look him straight in the eye as I do so.
He takes a moment to listen to me, only to fully realize what I'm saying within seconds. In shock, he stares at me with wide eyes before breaking out into a nervous chuckle. "You're serious, right?" He asks, making my eyebrows furrow. My reaction causes him to become worried as his smile drops. "Please don't be joking," Greg begs, placing his hands on my arms.
His words slightly... befuddle me. Is the cold and emotionless House actually excited about me being pregnant? For him to question me to make sure I'm not joking makes me... I don't know what it makes me actually.
Does Greg want a child? I know we didnt plan this little one, but there's no going back now. I mean, Greg is quite a few years older than me and I would've never thought he'd want a kid this late in life, but Gregory House is Gregory House. If there's one thing that signifies Gregory House, it's that he's weird and unusual, and he never conforms to what is socially acceptable.
"No, I'm not joking, Greg," I tell him, placing his hands on my stomach. "There's a little baby right here," With Greg staring up at me with big eyes and an equally big smile, tears quickly make their way to my eyes. "You're going to be a father," I whisper, leaning forward and placing my forehead against his.
A few moments of silence pass before Greg grins and wraps his arms tighter around me. In a quick turn of events, he stands up with our feet planted on the ground and his arms still around me, a giggle falling from my lips as he does so. Before I know it, Greg is moving my shirt up to place his hands on my barely swollen tummy, resting them there as I hug him to me as well. “Thank you,” He murmurs, smiling before connecting our lips in another kiss. At the same time, he moves his hands to my waist to hold me there, his hold reflecting the passion behind our kiss.
#house md#greg house#gregory house#greg house imagine#greg house x reader#greg house imagines#gregory house x reader#gregory house imagine#gregory house imagines#gregory house fanfiction#greg house fanfiction#house md fanfiction#house md imagines#house md imagine#house md x reader
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circumambient - paul x reader
AN: << A request from @bonecrusher0 >> “This might be long but could you do a Paul x reader, where the reader has a tough life always having to take care of her little brother/sister while her single mom always has to work. Therefore even though Paul imprinted on her and she loves him back, she tells him she can’t be with him without telling him the reason yet. Which makes Paul extremely confused and angry so he later insists. She then tells him she has too much going on looking after her sibling and doesn’t want to drag him with her with her responsibilities. But he then reassures her saying he’d love to help and be apart of her life and then she caves in and they have a sweet moment. 🤍”
<<this seems very fun to write! 💜☺️ hope you enjoy :)
Distant sounds of a morning alarm is blaring, that’s your queue to wake your sibling up. They are fast asleep, curtains closed, completely oblivious to the alarm that’s supposed to wake them up. You open the curtains and let the morning shine light up the room and gently shake your little sibling awake.
They fight to wake up. They want to sleep more and beg for just five more minutes. You still persist, knowing they cannot be late for school.
You help them pick out an outfit and tell them to brush their teeth while you make them some breakfast. Your mother appears in her work uniform and tells you to don’t wait up. She’s pulling another double, to minimize the piled up bills that have been mailed to her address. You wish her well on her day, she kisses your little sibling on the cheek and she leaves in a rush.
Your little sibling pulls out a permission slip for a field trip as they’re eating their breakfast and you gawk at them. The field trip was today and they needed money for admission and a lunch.
“How come you haven’t let anyone know earlier?” you tell him, trying to be patient.
They just simply shrug and say, “I forgot.”
You quickly sign the permission slip, dig around your bedroom and house for loose money and scrape up the amount for their trip. You then use the last bit of bread and left over lunch meat to make them a sandwich, a small metal water bottle and fill it up with cold faucet water, and the last crumbles of chips that were in the cabinet as their snack. You tried your best to hide the struggles from your sibling. You’ve unfortunately grown up too fast, growing up to know every single shut off notice, ever single eviction note, and every single financial struggle.
You take their hand and walk them to school, making sure they have everything that they need to have a good day at school.
“Have a good day. I love you.” you tell them, kiss them on the forehead and they run into the building.
You then go back home to rush and get your own self together. It doesn’t take you long because you’ve been doing this routine time and time again. You grab cds that you don’t mind giving away and make your way out of the door. You walk the streets until you make a quick stop into a video buy-and-trade store. They give you some type of money for the value of your items.
You arrive at school and you remember all of the homework you had to stay up late to complete the night before. Some of it was makeup work, nights have been so hectic that sometimes you would forget to do it or fall asleep before even thinking about homework.
Your friends at school are strictly your school friends. You have fun with them to distract the grueling school atmosphere and you don’t have to make plans with them after school. It’s not like you would be able to anyway.
Since you have been in advanced classes, earned extra school credits, you earned the privilege of the few to leave school earlier than other students.
You use some loose change in your bag to catch a ride to Paul’s house. That was the place where you could go to forget the reality that you had to face at home. You could just be you with him. He made you feel like things were smooth in your life.
He heard your footsteps on the steps as you were walking to the door. He opens the door and grabs you in a hug. He pulls back a little to have a look at your face and you giggle and he nuzzles your neck.
You two sit at a table eating his extra leftovers and you two talk about the possible future. You will never forget the feeling you had when you found out about your imprint with Paul. You felt like the happiest and luckiest girl in the world. With Paul you felt like you could own the world.
Lounging on his couch, the television humming, he looks over to you with a serious expression.
“When are you going to try me on?”
“Paul…Really?” you ask, you thought he wouldn’t start this time. You hated when the conversations would turn into this.
He pulls your hand to incase with his and you automatically look deeply at him.
“I want us to take it to another level. I like you alot and I know you like me alot.” he says.
“I don’t know… I don’t think I like you that much.” you say trying to be dismissive but he sees right through your words and doesn’t even take it serious.
“Come on..I’m serious. You try to brush me off but you forget I know how you feel.” He says and he has your undivided attention.
“I want to talk about something else.” you tell him, you know he will go deeper. He sighs a soft frustrated sigh. “Why?” he asks.
“I can’t be with you, us being together won’t happen. We can’t keep talking about this.”
You leave Paul’s house, he makes sure he kisses you before saying farewell, you of course give into the action.
“See…” he says grinning while you’re in a love haze for a second. You shake your head and walk away from his house.
You arrive to your little sibling’s school to pick them up. They go into detail about their day, exclaiming the experience that they had on the trip and how they were glad to be able to go. You’re just glad you made it possible for them.
You stop past the grocery store with them and grab more bread and eggs. You check the mail as always and lock up. As your sibling is washing up, you make them dinner. While dinner is going, you automatically see more bills that seem to never end. You look up to your not so perfect ceiling and wonder what it would be like to never have to worry about something like this ever again.
You tuck in your sibling and figure out a way to not be so stressed out. They tell you that they’re cold. You give them an extra blanket, the furnace being broken and the property manager won’t fix it unless all of what they’re owed is paid to them.
You do your homework but you hurry to be able get some type of sleep. Late into the night when you’re finishing up, your mother walks in beat. She says a simple good night before she has to turn around to take on another shift.
Hours still left in the night, you go to your part time job. It’s something easy. Your entire paycheck goes into decreasing the debt. Still having faith on climbing out of the hole to live a semi confortable life. You get back home to take a nap before reawakening to get you and your little sibling ready for school.
“No patrol this weekend. I want to see you”
This is a text from Paul that you receive and think it over while you steam your little sibling’s clothes for the school day. Your mother, dressed in her uniform takes a look at one of the letters sitting around. Her face is tired and defeated. She shakes her head as she reads it over. She tells you that she’s going to work weekends to help make it up. You couldn’t remember the last time she spent a weekend at home. She’s goes to work after her goodbyes.
You open the door to Paul standing there about to knock. He offers you and your sibling a ride, your sibling being excited that they don’t have to walk. You appreciate this gesture. You give him a kiss on the cheek to make him feel good about this good deed.
When he comes with you to pick your little sibling up from school, your sibling is talking to a friend. By the looks of it, they have planned something. You hear words, “Yeah I’ll ask.”
“What’s up?” you ask them.
There’s a sleepover and they’re invited. They beg you to go. Since it’s their best friend that you and your mother have known since forever, you agree. Paul invites you two over for dinner, you hesitantly accept but he is persistent into changing your mind. Your sibling is devouring their plate. They couldn’t remember the last time they were able to have seconds.
Paul is amused and doesn’t think of it. You keep a close eye. Once he drops you two off back home, he asks you again to see you this weekend. You tell him you’re not sure. He tries to be a good sport but respects your wishes.
Your little sibling being away for the weekend makes things a bit more easier. It still doesn’t make the situation that your in any lighter. You’re back broke again, tackling on a bill or two.
Paul texts you and asks you to please come outside. He drives around for a bit and takes you to his favorite view. You two sit on the hood of his vehicle and stargaze.
The emotions are too strong. The ambiance bringing you two together. Paul knows this, cups your face into his hands and drowns you with a kiss. Your knees almost buckle and you’re pulling him closer to you. He pulls away when you need air.
“Please don’t make this harder for us. Don’t you see? I love you. I love us.” he says with passion.
“I love you too.” you admit and tears start to form due to frustration. Your mind goes back to the life that is set out for you. You have to be there for your sibling, your mother would have to continue to work hard, and you have to take up most of the slack. There was no way you were bringing someone that you cared about into that willingly. He had a choice to walk away from you and not to worry about you.
He goes in for another kiss, trying to savor this moment. You step back and shake your head. Confusion painted all over his face.
“But it can’t happen-“ before you could finish, his hands are in the air.
“You need to quit lying. Why are you fighting this? We both need each other. You won’t talk to me…Please…” he takes your hands and you look down.
He lifts your head up, “I’m right here. Stop holding back.”
You open your mouth and just let it out. You let him know the hole that you’re trying to dig out of. You tell him your fears of things not working in the morning. You tell him the money you have to scrape up to eat because the money that you do work for, isn’t enough to leave you with any wiggle room. You tell him that your back is up against the wall. You feel trapped and you weren’t dragging someone that you loved into that. How you hope that your little sibling don’t have to worry about anything other than the simplicity of the life that they seem to have, not taking off the rose colored glasses to life.
Paul is silent. He takes it all in. He doesn’t know how to feel. He wants to be upset why he hasn’t been told this. You were supposed to tell him everything. His silence scares you.
“I’m supposed to be there for you. I wish you didn’t keep this from me.” He finally says.
You’re in shock. You expected him to be turned off or run away.
“I could’ve helped you this entire time. You don’t have to do this alone. You have me. You hear me? You have me.” he says. You nod and you gift him affection that he gladly gives back.
He promises you to always pick and drop off you and your sibling up for school, dinners will be at his place, and after graduation, he lets you know that a roof over your head will never be something you would have to worry about. He promises to be there for you forever. You know that he actually means it. He holds you tight. You feel relief. You haven’t felt this free in a long time.
#twilight#twilight aesthetic#twilight wolves#twilight wolfpack#twilight saga#paul lahote#la push#fanfic#quileute#y/n#y/n imagines#twilight x y/n#x y/n#paul lahote fanfic#twilight fanfiction#romance fanfic#fanfiction#paul lahote imagine#paul lahote x reader#paul lahote x you#angst fic#angst with a happy ending
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7x09 deleted scene coda
For the anon who requested it! Hope this is as fun to read as it was to write.
When Buck sighs, it sounds despondent, even to his own ears, which is insane considering he’s finally got a medal and isn’t being court martialed for his involvement in the theft of municipal property. There’s no reason to feel this put out.
"Are you sure you don't want anything?" Maddie asks, her patented kindness warring with incredulity bordering on annoyance. She used to sound like that whenever he’d get caught skipping school to go hang out at Swatara Creek.
He sighs again. "No."
"Because you’ve been staring at the dessert table for, like, four whole minutes," she says.
"It's a free country, Mads," he reminds her without looking away from the golden idol he’s just now decided to start worshiping. It totally goes against the Ten Commandments, but according to Eddie, breaking one of those means you can just repent twice as hard. Or something like that. It’s becoming very apparent that Eddie’s whole thing with religion is kind of screwy. "I can stare at a platter of cannolis if I want. Because of freedom."
"You know you can't absorb sugar molecules through osmosis, right? You're basically just torturing yourself."
With one last longing look at the chocolate chips dotting the ricotta cream, he turns to her and sticks his tongue between his teeth to be a brat. "Yeah, but my Adonis belt lines can cut glass, so who’s really losing here?"
The look she gives him is flat as a board. "Still you."
"I… don’t have a comeback for that right now, but I’m working on it," he promises, ignoring her eye roll in favor of searching for something else to focus his attention on. It usually helps to take his mind off the ketonic headache he’s been rocking for the last week.
His gaze locks on his target with an almost audible click, and he watches Captain Vincent Gerrard stop to take a photo with some dark-haired woman and then make a face behind her back as soon as she walks away.
That "heard you got your wings" comment has been bouncing off the walls of his mind like a DVD player screensaver for the last half hour, and hot on its heels is the memory of the muscle jumping in Tommy’s jaw in the pause that followed. Normally, Tommy would’ve stuffed that silence with at least two comments so dry and hilarious it would take a minute for anyone to realize they were the shiny wrappers around devastating insults. But he didn’t. It was like his jaw was wired shut, and it physically pained Buck to see it. Thank god Chim was there with a killer response at the ready.
Tommy’s told him a little about his time under Gerrard and while he hasn’t exactly painted a picture he’s definitely drawn the outline of a paint-by-numbers image that Buck can easily color in.
There are very few people Buck can say he truly hates, especially when he doesn’t actually know them himself. But he hates Gerrard. He hates him for the way he made and still makes Tommy feel like he has to be someone else, someone so incredibly different than the man Buck has come to know and utterly adore. He hates him for stealing the grin off Chimney’s face today. He hates Gerrard for getting into Buck’s own head and pulling his focus in the first place, for casting a shadow on what should’ve been a perfect day.
Buck may not be eating sugar these days, but there are about sixty Domino packets in his pockets that will be getting up close and personal with Gerrard’s gas tank before the day’s through.
"Huh. Wonder what that’s about."
Blinking away the red haze from his vision, Buck gives Gerrard’s back a little sneer before he turns his head to see what Maddie’s talking about. He follows her gaze across the room to where Hen and Karen are standing in front of Tommy, shoulder to shoulder like they’re presenting a united front. It’s amazing how they make someone of Tommy’s height and build look small. Whatever it is they’re discussing, it looks grave. Maybe the pall of Gerrard’s presence is affecting more than just Tommy. Maybe it’s opened up old wounds from the days when Tommy was—by Tommy’s own admission—an asshole.
He starts getting to his feet to go over and assess the situation, but suddenly Tommy breaks away from Hen and Karen, and the second he’s beyond their line of sight, the corners of his mouth curve up. By the time Tommy makes it back to their table, plate of cake in hand, he’s beaming.
"Everything… okay?"
"Everything’s great." Tommy pulls out the seat next to him and wiggles a little as he sits. Buck’s never really understood the phrase "pleased as punch," but he’s starting to get an inkling.
Buck looks at Maddie, who widens her eyes and shrugs. "Uh, what were you talking about? It looked pretty serious."
Taking a practically pornographic bite of the cake—which is just plain mean—Tommy holds up a finger, smiling while he chews, before he swallows. He presses his knee to Buck's and says cheerfully, "I just got the shovel talk."
"The what?"
Across the table, Maddie rolls her eyes fondly and says, "You know what a shovel talk is, Evan. It's the verbal equivalent of a dad cleaning his shotgun on the porch when his daughter's prom date shows up."
Tommy nods in agreement. "You know: 'if you break his heart, I'll break your knees.'"
It feels like Buck's eyebrows are trying to make a daring escape from his face via his hairline. "Hen threatened to break your knees?"
"Not in so many words, but it was heavily implied." Tommy sounds positively thrilled about it. "They wanted to know if my intentions toward you were honorable. Although I think Karen was just fishing for details, to be honest."
Maddie's eyes are bright when she leans forward, like this is the juiciest bit of gossip she's ever heard. Buck crumbles up his napkin and throws it at her. She peaceably lets it bounce off her head. "And? What'd you say?"
"That we're taking it slow."
His jaw drops, which only serves to remind him that it's still aching from this morning. "So you lied?"
"I did not," Tommy says primly, knocking his knee against Buck's. "But I also did some heavy implying of my own."
The wink he tosses Buck's way is downright filthy, and when he takes another bite of his cake he rumbles so deeply with pleasure that the table practically vibrates.
Squirming a little in his chair, with the familiar heat that blossoms any time he's within ten feet of Tommy making its way down his chest and into his belly, Buck scans the room to see if there's an empty coat closet somewhere nearby. The reception's loud enough that no one would hear a thing. Probably. Buck's starting to gain a reputation for being a bit of a screamer.
A fork taps his knuckles lightly, bringing his attention back, and Tommy gives him one of those knowing looks that always leave Buck feeling breathless and exposed on an atomic level.
"No." The corner of Tommy's mouth curls up, and he nods at Evan's plate of chicken wings. "Eat your protein."
It's truly terrible, incredible timing that Chimney comes back to the table from wherever he went just in time to hear Buck say, voice full of sleaze, "Between our shower this morning and the buffet, I've hit my protein quota for the day."
Without a word, Chimney turns around and walks in the opposite direction.
Maddie collapses into her folded arms, cackling, and Buck can't help but join in. Tommy drops his head into his hands, shoulders shaking.
"Timing is everything," Maddie practically cries.
"Well, I'm definitely getting kicked out of the group chat," Tommy says through his laughter. "Worth it."
Snickering, Buck nudges him with an elbow. It should feel like hitting the side of a mountain, but Tommy obligingly lets himself be moved, and Buck's rib cage feels like it's both expanding and shrinking at an exponential rate. His bones are going to vibrate to dust and his heart is going to be on display for everyone to see.
Swallowing around the sudden lump in his throat, he says, "Hey, most people aren't usually this happy to be threatened with grievous bodily harm, you know. Is this a rom-com thing?"
Still chuckling a little, Tommy takes a thoughtful bite of his cake and shrugs. "I'm allowed to be happy about it."
"Are you?"
"Absolutely," Tommy says, with his signature decisiveness. He slides his fork down through layers of cake and delicately cuts himself a corner with a frosting flower. "This is the first time anyone's ever cared enough to threaten me about someone I'm with. It means this is real to them."
He punctuates that by gesturing with his fork, the flower drawing a sugary line in the space between them, and then brings it to his mouth with a pleased hum.
Buck has seen at least twenty documentaries about nuclear bombs, with enough footage that Buck could describe in great, gory detail what blast, fire, and radiation can do to someone, to a city.
J. Robert Oppenheimer's famous quote, used in at least half of those documentaries—if the radiance of a thousand suns were to burst at once into the sky—suddenly comes to mind, damn near taking Buck out at the knees, and he stares dumbly as Tommy chews his cake like he didn't just devastate the entire landscape.
Maddie lifts her head from her arms and catches Buck's eye. There's something gentle and sweet lurking in her gaze, and he ducks his head a little with a smile, feeling caught out, even though he's not the one courting mayhem this time.
The knee pressed to his knocks against it again, and Buck blinks, startled out of his daze, to find a tiny dollop of white frosting held out to him on Tommy's fork. He looks just beyond it to where Tommy's smiling at him, like he knows exactly what he was doing when he said that, and is even happier about it than he was about his kneecaps being on the line.
"It's yours if you want it," Tommy says easily. It sounds like he's offering something else.
Heart pounding, Buck leans forward and wraps his lips around the edges of the tines, taking that small offering onto his tongue where it hits with the intensity of a thermonuclear explosion.
Buck doesn't know what his face is doing, but it makes Tommy's gaze go dark with want.
A throat clears, and Buck reluctantly looks away to where Maddie is sitting. She's staring at Tommy with an odd smile on her face, one he doesn't think he's ever seen before. It's beautiful, of course, because all her smiles are, but there's an odd promise in it that makes Buck sit up a little straighter.
"Maddie?"
She doesn't even spare him a glance. "You break his heart? There's no helicopter in the world that will help you escape from me."
Tommy's eyes go wide, and Buck opens his mouth to tell him that she's kidding, that she would never, but he closes it because it feels like it would be a lie to say it.
But a grin breaks over Tommy's face like a sunrise, and the tilled-field lines at the corners of his eyes threaten to become trenches. "Good to know."
It sounds like he's never been so happy in his entire life.
Read on AO3
#bucktommy#911#the 118: you hurt him and we'll break you in half like a kit-kat bar#tommy: this is the best day of my life#rc's 911 fics
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Puzzle Pieces Ch13
(Mafia!Miguel x Shy!Reader)
Ch.1, Ch.2, Ch.3, Ch.4, Ch.5, Ch6, Ch7, Ch8, Ch9, Ch10, Ch11, Ch12
Warning: Smut so Minors DNI, mentions of abuse, blood, murder, language, fluff, bullying, mentions of sex, praise
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The only thing that you swore you could hear was the sound of your own pounding heart beat. Your body was still slump against the beg, legs too weak to move. Tears were still rolling down your cheeks as your mother's voice echoed inside your head.
"I-I need...I n-need to..." The words kept getting caught in your throat.
Reaching for your phone again, you quickly texted Miguel. You needed to inform him about your parent's plan. It was unfair. How could they decide something for you? You had specifically told them that you needed to get away from Eddie.
Perhaps you should have told them the reason, but would that have made a difference? Recalling the many times your parents ignored the bruises you had or the many hospital visits, you knew that this was nothing new.
Upon hearing your phone buzz, you quickly picked it up.
'Sorry, baby, I'm in a very important meeting. Can't talk right now, but Lyla will be there soon.'
It was just a text message. You replied with a simple, 'okay', and sunk back into the bed. Miguel was a busy man. You didn't want to distract or interrupt his important work. You would just have to wait until he got back to tell him the horrible news.
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It took about an hour, but you were finally ready to hang out with Lyla for the day. Mentally, you were not ready, but you had to be. It would be best to distract yourself. You couldn't let your parents or Eddie ruin your life anymore.
"Helloooooooooooooo~" Lyla cheered as she twirled inside the penthouse. You jumped, pinching your sleeves,
"H-Hello. L-Lyla?" You questioned. Lyla gasped at the sight of you,
"Oh! You must be (Y/N)! You are cuter in person! No wonder Miguel is head over heels for you!" She chirped, wrapping her arm around yours, "Today is going to be so much fun! I hope you're ready to have a girl's day! Jessica!"
"I'm here, I'm here." Jessica said with a heavy sigh.
You felt a little overwhelmed the moment you heard another voice, but immediately recognized the other woman. You glanced at Lyla, then towards Jessica in awe. Miguel really was watching over you while you were working.
You ended up smiling to yourself as you easily followed the two women downstairs. They were happily enjoying their conversation with each other. You wanted to chip in, but were too shy to say anything. They were still strangers to you.
"Alright, so (Y/N), where do you want to start?" Lyla asked as they approached a car similar to Miguel's.
"U-Uh, I...W-What does...What does Miguel...l-like?" You whispered as you gripped your sleeves. Jessica raised her head, her jaw agape,
"I wasn't told we were shopping for Miguel."
"Ohhhh, neither was I! This is going to be even better!" Lyla laughed and pulled out her phone, "You are so cute, (Y/N), I know just where to go~"
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Miguel felt a shiver run down his spine. He glanced up towards the lab's air conditioning, wondering if it was blasting higher than normal. Wanting to shake the feeling off, Miguel continued his walk around the lab, listening to one of his scientists give an explanation of their yearly findings.
"Sir, with your permission, there is a project that some of the men would like to conduct downstairs in lab number four." The scientist spoke up. Miguel lazily glanced in his direction,
"What project?"
"It appears that there is a new drug on the streets that is causing a-"
"No." Miguel yelled loudly, "Do you have any idea what could happen if anyone finds that drug here? Whom ever is the source of importing that cursed drug will not use Alchemax as a scrape goat."
"I understand that, sir, which is why we created a safe way for no one to find out. We want to break down the drug and see what is causing such an effect in humans." The scientist begged. Miguel gave one more glare towards his scientist,
"That drug will not enter this building. The only way you can get that accursed item in these labs is if the CDC contacts us personally. Understood?" Miguel hissed, his glare more menacing than ever.
"Y-Yes, sir!"
Miguel scoffed before making his way out of the lab. Normally, he'd behave himself a little better in front of anyone outside his mafia, but not for this. That drug was going to be the death of him. Not only was it threatening his family, but now his job.
As Miguel walked around Alchemax, he kept an eye on his watch. Awaiting any news about either Eddie or this drug. Spotting a photo message, Miguel clicked on it and immediately grew flustered. He rushed into the closest private room and called Lyla.
"Yes~" Lyla cooed over the phone. Miguel nearly grinded his teeth,
"¡Me estás matando! (You're killing me!) You're supposed to be helping (Y/N) with shopping, not sex toy hunting!" Miguel spat. Lyla just laughed over the phone,
"I told you he'd love it~"
"A-Are y-you sure? I-I um..."
"Dios mio (My god), put (Y/N) on the line."
"H-Hello, Miguel," You hummed happily. Miguel smiled towards the sound of your voice before noticing his erection,
"Baby, you know you don't have to listen to all of their suggestions. Just pick whatever you like out and I will love it. Honest," Miguel said sweetly before locking himself in the room.
"A-Are you s-sure?"
"Yes."
"O-Okay...Um, M-Miguel...L-Later...I...I h-have s-something important t-to tell you."
Miguel furrowed his brows by the sound of your voice. You were trying your best to not stutter as much, but Miguel knew that something was wrong.
"(Y/N), what's wrong? It doesn't have to wait until later if it's hurting you now."
"..."
"(Y/N)?"
"M-My...My parents...called me....and..." You were whispering with a shaky breathe, "T-They engaged me...w-with...w-with my...my...ex!"
Miguel nearly crushed his phone as you sobbed over the phone. His blood began to boil as he stood from his seat. Approaching the window in the private room, Miguel glared down at the city below his feet.
"Don't worry, (Y/N), everything will be okay. I'll take care of you."
"M-Miggy," You sobbed quietly as Lyla and Jessica comforted you, "C-Can I...Can I move in?"
"Of course." Miguel whispered, "Baby, I have something I need to do now. Have Lyla and Jessica take you by your apartment to start moving your stuff. Okay?"
"O-Okay."
Once you hung up, Miguel let out an angry yell. He proceeded to slam his fists into the nearest table, destroying it with ease. Once he was calm enough, Miguel reached for his phone again and decided to make a few calls.
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You felt horrible. You were having such a good time with Lyla and Jessica and you ended up a crying mess. Luckily, you were able to squeeze out that you were not crying because of them. God, that would make you feel worse.
"Is this where you live?" Jessica questioned as they arrived in a shitty neighborhood, "This is Kraven's territory."
"Was," Lyla whispered. You rubbed your eyes as you looked for your building,
"What...do y-you mean by that?" You asked. Jessica sighed softly since Miguel had not told you anything yet,
"This area belonged to a former mafia family, but...They were taken over so now it's safe here." She explained. Lyla pitched in,
"Taking a while to get repairs done though. The permits from the city sure do take a minute,"
"Ah,"
You just agreed, slowly processing what they said. Once you were at your building, the two women followed you in. You offered your couch to Jessica, not wanting the pregnant women to move around too much.
Looking for your suitcase, both you and Lyla started to pack some of your stuff. Lyla reassured you that she could get a moving truck by tomorrow for some of your bigger things if you truly wanted to keep them.
"T-Thank you both...s-so much for t-today and...everything," You whispered and glanced over at Jessica, "A-And t-thank you...for...for watching me...at...at work."
"Heh, no problem girl. When Miguel cares for someone, he will make sure that you are always cared for."
You smiled brightly as you thanked the two once more. Right as you were going to bring down your bags, Lyla had the driver come and help. You offered everyone a quick drink before grabbing some of your stuffed animals and returning to the car.
"Can I just say, I was so surprised Miguel's place was covered in these little guys. You sure work wonders." Lyla chuckled. You covered your face, feeling embarassed,
"M-Miguel j-just kept buying them...H-He said he doesn't mind."
"Amazing. Anyway, why don't we take this Christmas shopping more seriously. Let's go find a gift for Miguel." Jessica said with a grin.
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Eddie inhaled deeply as he watched you leave with the other two women. He threw his cigarettes' on the floor and exhaled. A large puff of smoke floating into the air as he snarled. At least now he finally found where you lived, but-
"That had to be her the other day." Eddie spat.
Frustrated that his former toy had found a new man to fuck, Eddie cussed and yelled. He kept his glare towards your building, knowing that eventually you had to come back. You were going to be his again. Eddie was a forgiving guy.
He could forgive you.
After a little lesson, of course.
Walking down the street, Eddie saw some homeless people cozying up by a trash fire. Approaching the small crowd, Eddie grinned from ear to ear as he took out a decent size bag of his new drug.
"Hey, fellas. Got a job for ya." Eddie offered.
Once a deal was struck, Eddie decided to head back to his base of operations. He needed to get things moving with his drug if he wanted to take over the city. As he walked down the snow covered streets, Eddie felt his phone go off.
"What's new?" Eddie answered before slowly coming to a stop, "Whoa, what do you mean you were bought out?! You're the owner! You can say no-"
Feeling as if he was being watched, Eddie hurried down the street. He cussed as he kept his conversation with the person on the other line. After a while, Eddie found a quiet and remote spot where those eyes disappeared.
"We had a deal. How are we supposed to distribute our drug across the city now?" Eddie hissed.
'We can still use the girl'
"Fuck it. We can still use (Y/N). Little slut can wiggle her way onto the other mafia leader laps to spread the drug. Tsk, and we wanted this to be easy," Eddie whispered to himself since he had hung up a while ago.
Stuffing his hands into his pockets, Eddie reached for a different looking cigarette. He lit it up and inhaled deeply before continuing to walk around the city.
"We can still use, (Y/N). We...can still use her."
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Dimmsdale Rich Families Analysis
Misc. musings that haunt me daily...
I love Dimmsdale's rich families... You've got the Dimmadomes who are all about real estate, fancy buildings, hosting city events, and (Thanks to Dale) they got into tech and shipping.
Contrast that with the "old-fashioned pencil and paper" vibes of the Leadlys, plus the Buxaplentys running the trains... It's a triangle of supporting each other's businesses (and thus, the rich get richer).
This post written under the assumption we're treating these episodes as canon, though I cherrypick "Country Clubbed" in my worldbuilding and I use Dimmsdale's founding year from Season 3 over the one given in Season 9.
General Background
Several flashback episodes imply the FOP world exists in a timeline where the English settled at least part of the west coast in 1665 (as opposed to the Spanish).
- Presumably, this is one of the unique things a universe-hopper like Jimmy Neutron would identify this world by. - On that note, people are heavily implied to "stand differently" in the FOP world, which is why visitors from other dimensions react with surprise when they see their bodies (and fall over before they get their footing):
Just some fun "alt reality" vibes. Enjoy your visit; sea legs required.
Notably, this is also a universe where trains existed on the west long before they existed in ours, but we'll get to that.
Today I'm discussing the Dimmadomes, Leadlys, and Buxaplentys, but for anyone who's interested in learning more about rich families, Season 9's "Country Clubbed" namedrops a bunch.
Dimmadome Family
We know the Dimmadomes for their impact in the modern world- they're always innovating, hopping from one thing to the next. Dale does seem to have consistency in the businesses he owns (though I am DYING to question what his plans are for that indoor amusement park).
Doug doesn't seem able to commit to anything for long, though we know he's very proud of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome. He hosts many events throughout the series, from music shows to wrestling to demolition derbies.
Dimmsdale was founded in 1665, named after Dale Dimm (following him throwing Alden Bitterroot the witch down a well). It's possible Dale Dimm is an ancestor of the Dimmadomes, given what we know about:
- Dimmadomes having their hand in things (including the founding of Dimmadelphia). - One Dimmadome ancestor using the surname Dimm ("Lost and Founder's Day"). - Dale Dimm's very tall, barefoot figure is a hilarious ancestor choice for Doug "tall hat" and Dale "boot obsessed" descendants when you think about it.
While it's heavily implied Dale was born into generational wealth, we can't confirm whether that was (or wasn't) true for Doug. It's possible his family helped him get his start, but he seems to have kicked off his own success story by mining for gold (Presumably at a young age given that was back in 1953 and the main FOP series kicks off in 2001).
I like to think Doug (prior Dale's birth) changed his family's surname to Dimmadome to move away from the negative connotation of Dimm and commit himself fully to his big and shiny brand image.
Doug's a pretty interesting character! He's not afraid to get involved in his projects and work hard personally, as opposed to outsourcing- a trait he and his son Dale seem to share.
Doug also seems pained to surrender a check to Timmy in "Odd Ball" (even asking for a minute to say good-bye to his money), which isn't far off from Dale's attitude towards stocks.
He was even down to move to Alaska to follow the Ballhogs basketball team. He loves throwing all his chips on the table and doesn't back out easily. He also goes all-in with promotional outfits, like the parka above or his chicken costume in "Chicken Poofs."
That said, he might have some "sunk cost fallacy" views towards some of the stuff he buys. While the basketball team cheered they'd won the game by a close shave, Doug's first remark was that now he'd have to figure out what to do with all the stuff he bought in prep for their move to Alaska. He immediately started eating the Blubber Nuggets he would no longer be able to sell.
In "Chicken Poofs," when Doug sees the town inside his restaurant's chicken-dunking cages, his first thought isn't "Oh my gosh, I have to save these people." It's "These people stole my chickens- I'm ruined!" However (at Timmy's advice), he comes back from the loss of his chickens by selling the eggs they left behind. He wasn't about to go home empty-handed.
I'm obsessed with Doug's chicken-dipping machinery having labels so the thing one step up from Deep Fry is The Sun, and the step up from Sun is Lava. When would he ever need a dial that goes that high?
A "waste not, want not" attitude is fascinating in contrast to Dale being so incredibly wasteful, he brought two single-use helicopters on his trip to the park in "Stanky Danky." Is Dale rebelling against Doug's "We have to make the most of everything" parenting style? I think that plays really well into my vision of Dale being the first born into excessive wealth, while Doug possibly worked his way up after striking gold in 1953. Dale is wasteful, Doug more practical.
Doug is also over-the-top ridiculous and would sooner work around his love for tall hats than stop wearing them.
He owns a boot-shaped phone and a laptop with an armadillo logo, apparently. I'm not sure what they were going for with the armadillo - it's probably just random or meant to represent high security - but I looked it up and in Mayan folklore, armadillos are perceived as cunning critters that outwit people and dodge consequences thanks to their shells, which... Yeah, I think that sums the Dimmadomes up pretty well. Fun fact, but armadillos are one of the only things Fairy magic can't affect ("Teacher's Pet") because magic bounces off their shells. My Anti-Fairy biology incorporates pink fairy armadillo biology because we know Anti-Fairies are also immune to most Fairy magic. Just kind of a "Hm" implication, especially since "Crock Talk"' here and "Teacher's Pet" are both Season 7 episodes. I guess the other horrifying option is that Doug eats armadillos the way you eat apples, but...
I'm also of the opinion that Doug torched things in the Learnatorium, given what we know about the Learnatorium's interior ("Totally Spaced Out") and this scene of Doug "destroying childhood memories" in "Odd, Odd West"
In fact, it's not even a reach to say Doug takes pride in destroying people's cherished childhood memories. He seems to "look down on wasteful, childish things" and seems to value anything that is more useful in performing a task or turning a profit. Again, that's big "Everything must be useful and we can't waste space" energy (and presumably reflects on his offscreen parenting).
Where my fanworks are concerned, I love the idea that Doug paid for personal tutors to help Dale adjust to society and/or some basic schooling. Say... maybe an elementary teacher to start with? I don't think it would be unreasonable to theorize Crocker was involved with that, at least at first, as it helps justify the money he would've needed to expand the Crocker cave in the early days. -> We know from S4's "Genie Meanie Miney Mo" that Mr. Birkenbake states he can't afford a garage because he "doesn't make Crocker money," implying resentment... which is pretty interesting when you consider that Crocker also doesn't have his own place because he moved back in with his mom after university, and not even to his old room (Instead to a room above the garage). -> We know from S6's "Wishology Pt. 2" that Crocker stole the money intended for "the school's new science wing" and used that to pay for some of his tech, like his rocket. Both these episodes come well after S2's "Nectar of the Odds," so it's interesting to consider Crocker getting money earlier to support his tech pursuits in Seasons 2 and 3.
Dale seems to feel strongly about his dad- If it's not love, it's obsession and Grade-A Daddy Issues. His tent is shaped like his dad's head - despite Doug not being present at the event as far as we know - and even his house features statues of his dad.
Considering the nervous, over-the-top, aggressively money-chasing person Dale turned out to be, it's no surprise we can see a lot of Dale in Doug. While Vicky did a number on Dale's psyche, there's definitely some Doug influence in his behavior too.
Fun Fact: The Dimmadome gives off Roman Colosseum vibes, so it's fitting that one of the ancestors we saw in "Lost and Founder's Day" is an ancient Roman!
I would also be remiss not to look at the Dimmadome fortune, glance at the sheer number of businesses Doug is constantly opening... and question if there's some money laundering going on there. Seems kinda sus, ngl...
I'm just saying, Doug with a ton of "disposable income" (gold) because he ended up with a lot of it very quickly seems like a "great" way to get into gambling. Shout-out to the Dimmadomes and their obsessions that hint at addictive personalities. Actually, that makes Dev's game addiction so much darker and now I'm horrified. He could get into trouble so easily...
Also, in "Engine Blocked," Doug literally tries to pay Vicky with a bunch of [I assume fake] money with his face on it, so that's questionable...
One last interesting note is that the Dimmadrones (called such in "Stanky Danky" when chasing Cosmo, Wanda, and Hazel) are clearly based on the early model of Amazon delivery drones.
I think the obvious assumption is that Dale* built them for Dimmazon, but repurposed a few of them for Dev's caretaking (as opposed to them being built for Dev in the first place).
* It's possible the robots were built by a team, but knowing Dale programmed the statues in "Lost and Founder's Day" & Dale's seeming preference to do things himself rather than outsourcing, I'm going with the "Dale built them" theory.
This repurposing might be backed up by Dev referring to the ones that hang out with him as au pairs - a phrase meaning "caretaker" - and even claiming his au pairs are Au Pair #1 and Au Pair #2. While that might just be convenient shorthand since those are the two he interacts with, maybe those are a different type of Dimmadrone that was designed (or tweaked) specifically for Dev's care.
In a previous post, I discussed my headcanon of Dev having hypoglycemia and referenced the au pairs having the ability to "alert on him," or at least use both visuals and noise to signal him, as in this screenshot from "28 Puddings Later" showcasing a glowing exclamation point:
We also know Dev has specific food needs (Lactose intolerance), that he's very picky with his food (Even a treat like cupcakes that you would expect a 9-year-old to enjoy regardless), and that the au pairs are capable of food preparation (since Dev tells Hazel in "A New Dev-elopment" they can make sushi).
The au pairs are probably the most advanced, expensive, time-consuming models (compared to the ones that simply need to be mass produced for package pick-up and put-down).
I do like the thought that - for all his faults I didn't touch on here - Dale does care enough about Dev that he took the time to design two robots that could look after Dev in his absence... and specifically, took the time to think of what a child actually needs.
Dale probably thinks "I spent 7 years struggling... I would've loved the comfort of knowing my base needs like food were taken care of."
In my hypoglycemia post, I said the au pairs seem to know what hugs are and can recognize when Dev wants comfort. That implies Dale put a lot of thought into the design of the au pair and its ability to assess Dev's needs. Dale's not oblivious to what a child needs, like safety, appropriate food, and physical affection... He just lets the au pairs handle Dev.
Dale definitely gives the impression of someone who's making a genuine effort to parent, considering he missed out on healthy role models for at least 7 years of his life (Not to mention Doug is a wild character and probably fell short of being an excellent parent himself).
Along with designing the au pairs to look after him, Dale involves Dev in his projects, greets Dev, and answers his questions, and that's so interesting when you compare him with people like:
- Remy's parents (after the shipwreck in "Fairy Fairy Quite Contrary"'s closing scene) opting to count their surviving money and open a luxury hotel while still dressed in rags, forcing Remy to forage for his and their survival - Vicky and Tootie's parents opting to stay with perceived cannibals rather than disobey Vicky ("Timmy's 2D House of Horror"); they consistently let Vicky run the show and beg her forgiveness when they upset her. You could 100% make an argument that Vicky is Tootie's actual caregiver. - The "Fairy Idol" alt version of Bucky (Chester's dad) who lost his house and went off to party instead of securing food or shelter for his son. Also, Regular Bucky canonically feeds Chester animals he stole from the zoo or aquarium ("Who's Your Daddy?") and I think we should talk about that. - A.J.'s parents are fantastic in many ways, but there's something incredibly dark about the way they don't like A.J. going outside where there are germs ("Who's Your Daddy?"), they have a laser set up in front of their house to vaporize visitors ("The Big Scoop"), and A.J. seems to believe they dislike Chester (given his long silence after Chester asks why A.J.'s parents' security system got more aggressive after finding out he was Chester). - Later-season neglectful Timmy's parents (though I acknowledge I don't love that flanderized aspect of their character unless viewed from the 'got burned out after 50 extra years of parenting' lens, personally). - Clark and Connie who walked out on their daughter having an anxiety attack (and sent Chloe into a dissociative episode 3 times in the first episode they appeared). - A distracted adult Timmy ("Channel Chasers") leaving his kids with a robot Vicky babysitter despite the sight of weapons and his children begging.
Dale IS an antagonist and a neglectful parent. This post is not meant to take away from that or excuse it, but I think it's interesting that within the bounds of FOP characterization... He is pretty consistently in line with how parents in this show behave, and he does have many positives alongside his flaws. I totally understand why child protective services have not taken Dev from him.
Disclaimer: All characters are morally gray and this list is for amusing discussion purposes. I'm not calling these characters "bad parents" so much as highlighting interesting behaviors for consideration.
FOP's characterization leans into adults being foolish and neglectful - Dimmsdale is named after the idea that the adults are dim, after all - and I think it's worth evaluating all the FOP parents within that framework.
Related Dimmadome Posts:
- This post where I had the thought that Doug might have ADHD/OCD comorbidity (Hilariously, something I'd already decided to do with Dale and Dev...)
- This post comparing Doug and Dale body language
Leadly Family
S9's "Dog Gone" is a bonkers episode, and I love it so much. Notably, it's the episode that confirms Leadly is personally rich- Not just Pencil Nexus as a company, which has multiple branches in other states and can afford a jet.
In fact, Leadly is so rich, he offers to buy Sparky from the Turners for 17 million dollars, just because Sparky gave him the Heimlich maneuver and Leadly thought it was neat.
My personal headcanon for Leadly is that he's somewhat aware of magical beings and is actively seeking them.
The Leadly mansion is pencil-themed, of course.
The Dimmadomes and Buxaplentys are both confirmed to have generational wealth. We have no proof one way or the other for Leadly. It's likely his is too, but it's not impossible he founded Pencil Nexus and committed to its branding because he's proud of what he does.
Leadly doesn't have many appearances, but we know some very important things about him:
- He's convinced he's being haunted by a hot tub ghost, reason being that Cosmo likes to use his hot tub at night (whether Leadly's in it or not). Sparky also claims that he had an accident on Leadly's lawn (Crashing his car), but that Leadly blamed the hot tub ghost.
- He's super buff.
- His company is literally the only thing keeping a [presumably magical] forest from overtaking Dimmsdale, considering that when Pencil Nexus reduces their tree chopping in "The Boss of Me," the forest overtakes the city within a couple hours.
Did some godkid out there just wish for renewable trees and now Dimmsdale is cursed and suffering??
Leadly just flexes like this and has massive muscles, but his aren't as big as the people affected by the Everleadys.
The episode makes it explicitly clear that people's massive muscles are magic and aren't going away (Hence the lawsuits and decision to remove Everleady pencils from the world), but Leadly's muscles do fade when he stops flexing. His are natural.
Despite the jokes that he flies the company jet around to goof off, it's not unreasonable to think he's out there personally chopping trees and I respect him for it.
Y'know, I did wonder how on earth selling pencils made him rich enough that he can afford to spontaneously buy things for 17 million dollars (and keep a pet snow leopard that he apparently rides, considering it was tame enough for Timmy's Dad to ride it home from work and he parked it outside his house and it just stayed there).
Did he fight the snow leopard? Did he raise it? I'm afraid of him.
Conclusion: Ed Leadly has a monopoly on an infinitely replenishing wood source. His company can never take a break or the city will be overtaken by magic plants. Big "curse of Midas" vibes.
I can't stop thinking about how in "T.U.F.F. Puppy," it's implied that Petropolis exists in the same general location as Dimmsdale... Los Angeles county:
- Los Angeles' population in the 2010 census was 3,792,621. Dimmsdale's hillside letters parallel the Hollywood sign. - 91502 is the Burbank area code, where the Nickelodeon studio is - Jorgen claims in "Meet the OddParents" that the power he has to do that was vested in him by both Fairy World and Whittier, California. This seems to match the city borders seen in "Fairy Idol" while he's zooming in on Chester to assign Norm as his godparent.
This implies parallel universe vibes, though in my lore, I have all four Hartman shows blended into one continuity.
See my 2019 post, "A T.U.F.F. Timeline" or the shorter "How Hartman Shows Co-Exist" post if you want details on that
Here's the thing... In "T.U.F.F.," it's implied the forest near the city has been allowed to spread and evolve. Its bizarre flora and fauna certainly give a "non-natural evolution" vibe, so it's not implausible magic could be at play.
It's made very clear in "T.U.F.F. Puppy" that this show is still set on Earth, yet "Flower Power" refers to the Petropolis Rainforest. That implies this forest exists around the city. In fact, we know it's separate from the Amazon, which is referenced in "To Bee or Not to Bee").
Interestingly, the episode "Til Doom Do Us Part" depicts Petropolis being overrun by brightly colored flowers once weddings are mass canceled-
- which implies the florists are keeping the creep of nature back from Petropolis.
I feel like this is especially cursed in my lore where "T.U.F.F." exists in a post-FOP future... Leadly, your woods!! Oh no, he can't hear us... He's been gone for 2,000 years...
Shout-out to Pencil Nexus keeping Dimmsdale safe, one pencil at a time. And shout-out to Leadly's unique body language of gripping the sides of his coat, because he does it a lot and it makes me smile every time. He is just some background guy with a pencil-themed gimmick, but he has a special body language quirk and I love it.
Related Leadly Things:
- If you haven't watched S9's "Dog Gone," I recommend it. It's silly. There are some late-series episodes that give secondhand embarrassment vibes, but for some reason "Dog Gone"'s bizarre energy is so charming to me.
- Leadly appeared in these one-shots of mine, if you're interested in my portrayal of him hunting down magical creatures (and just generally being entitled and getting in the way): "Opportunity" & "Trying Too Hard"
Buxaplenty Family
The Buxaplentys have been running the railroads ever since Dimmsdale's early days, with Orville Buxaplenty the first to do so. Timmy's distant grandfather (Ebeneezer) mocks trains by claiming they're "just a fad" and there's no future in them- Thus, he chooses not to involve himself with trains and leaves Orville to do so alone.
This establishes the Buxaplenty wealth as being generational through these trains. Presumably, Dimmsdale has a large train station, as this seems to be where the Buxaplentys have set up shop.
If the Dimmadomes have businesses spanning Los Angeles to Dimmadelphia, it's very likely the trains play a key role. Assuming we take the 1665 founding date of Dimmsdale as canon ("Which Witch is Which?"), the trains may have been essential at moving resources from Dimmsdale to later found Dimmadelphia. -> See also, respawning magic woods (?) Rich people crossover of the centuries??
Notably, their family takes some heavy hits in "Country Clubbed" when Mr. Buxaplenty is forced to watch the destruction of the club, his mansion, yacht, and limo in quick succession.
The surname Buxaplenty is clearly a play on the phrase "bucks aplenty" (and I want to shout-out a 'fic I read many years ago - but unfortunately do not remember - that had a whole thing about Remy's surname actually being Buxley and everyone just calling them Buxaplentys in a derogatory way, because that's hilarious).
A neat detail about Remy is that in the Spanish version of Fairly OddParents, his surname is Cajallena, which (to my understanding) translates as "full cash register."
In my lore, I made Cajallena the maiden name of Remy's mom.
I did some poking around. Apparently, Remy is based on comic/cartoon character Richie Rich, popular from the 60s to the 90s or so (and who still shows up in modern reboots of things today).
I'm not familiar with this series, but both are blond, the only child in their family, and wear big red bows. After brief research, I get the impression Richie was at least a little associated with trains... even owning a toy trainset that costs 1 million dollars (and paying 8 million to buy the factory that makes a part of his set that broke).
I want to highlight this comparison:
From the Hanna-Barbera cartoon, I believe, and it looks like Richie owned other gold vehicles like a boat as well.
As for Remy himself, I believe I read a few years ago that he's designed around the concept of "green-eyed envy," so he has literal green eyes. I think envious is a very good way to describe his character, considering that his immediate reaction to learning Timmy has fairies was "If he has fairies, he could wish himself richer than me; I wish his fairies were gone."
This is a minor detail, but I rewatched some Remy scenes (especially the lunch scene in "Remy Rides Again" and the breakfast scene in "Stupid Cupid") because I could've sworn Remy said at some point that he likes caviar. That might be true - I didn't find it in my hasty rewatch - but I definitely laughed when I checked and saw that instead of eating caviar for lunch like I'd remembered, he ate steak. Kid knows what he wants.
We also know Remy enjoys Crimson Chin and Crash Nebula. Specifically, we know that he's a fan of Cleft the Boy Chin Wonder, but that when Remy ventures inside the comic world, he made the character more relatable to him by making Cleft rich... in addition to minor costume changes, such as slapping the Buxaplenty logo on him in place of Cleft's usual C.
Remy sees something in Cleft that connects with him, but that extra "I want Cleft to feel like me" bit is interesting. Admiring Cleft isn't enough. He needs to be "I am Cleft's secret identity. I, Remy Buxaplenty, have this alt life." The Crimson Chin can't seem to tell the difference between Timmy and Remy as Cleft - unsurprising since he's a comic character playing his role - but Remy saving the Chin from falling is one of the only acts of kindness we see him engage in. That implies Remy does value the Chin and/or feeling like a hero in some way... or if nothing else, he values the praise the Chin gives him.
As parents, the Buxaplentys are pretty interesting. Even by "dim FOP parents" standards, they're exceptionally bad at being loving - or even effective - parents.
- Remy's dad is so awkward, he's not even sure how to address Remy when we see them in "Fairy Fairy Quite Contrary." It's his wife that suggests he try "Son." Also, Remy's parents time themselves so they spend no more than 2 minutes per day with him, which they tell him openly.
- Remy's dad calls him "Liam" later, which isn't close to his name... but Remy's grateful to be acknowledged anyway, which has interesting implications. Remy takes anything he can get; putting up with what little scraps they offer to avoid the risk of turning them off the idea of reaching out to him.
- At the end of the episode, Timmy wishes Remy could spend more time with his parents. We can assume Cosmo and Wanda didn't want to hurt the Buxaplentys on purpose - especially given what we know (from episodes like "Boys In a Band" & "Go Young, West Man") about Da Rules preventing godkids from harming others directly.
So that begs the question... Was shipwrecking the Buxaplentys the only option to get them to pay attention to their son? That's kinda dark... Angela will turn down a book pitch to care for sick Hazel, but "Remy gets sick and a parent tends to him" was seemingly not on the table. Which does make sense in-universe- After all, there are plenty of butlers and staff who wait on Remy.
Remy even tells us that his parents stopped paying attention to him after about 3 seconds despite being stranded with him on a desert island, which is pretty bad... but it gets worse when you realize Remy was stranded between Seasons 2 and 5.
When he returns in "Remy Rides Again," he asks Timmy to "guess where he's been," and informs him he "just got back from an uncharted island."
Combining that with Remy's claim that his parents only paid attention to him for 3 seconds - and looking at the scenes of Remy foraging for food while he wears rags and his parents get involved with business despite being stranded - That's..... just awful.
That's a long time for Remy to be without the comforts of home or the comforts of Juandissimo while struggling to survive (and keep his parents alive along with him). Depending on where you personally place Timmy's time freeze, it can get way worse.
And Remy was just happy he had time with his parents... Happy to forage for food... Happy to get a headpat... and for what? They don't deserve you, kid.
For all his greediness and schemes, he is pretty grateful for what little he has. In addition to looking forward to spending time with his parents, when Remy is venting to Timmy at the end of "Remy Rides Again," not once does he mention "And I didn't have my nice things." He says "I didn't have my fairy, Juandissimo, to comfort me."
Remy's parents don't even take care of themselves, let alone pay attention to his needs. They chose not to leave the deserted island - and apparently took their sweet time calling for clothes to be delivered - and Remy seems to be the one in charge of food.
Also, the implication here is that Juandissimo gave some part of his physical form up so Remy could eat, which is horrifying?? Did that happen multiple times, considering these scenes take place immediately after the shipwreck and later after Remy's mom opens her luxury resort, so definitely different days? Did... did Remy reach the point where he was struggling to find food - or the more awful option, struggling to find food for himself because he was giving it to his parents first - and Juandissimo said "F that" ??? ... help.
On top of all this, the official canon is that Juandissimo couldn't hold a job after being separated from Remy because he was so hung up on Remy's situation (and his own shame that he failed), he couldn't stop crying, so he bounced from job to job.
It's the thing I love most about Juandissimo, because when he's introduced in FFQC, he's a huge lapdog for Da Rules, even going off about how not following them would lead to madness. But we learn one very, very important thing about Juandissimo in "Remy Rides Again"... which is that Juandissimo openly broke Da Rules to return Remy's memories.
He's very clear about this: "I decided to help you no matter what Da Rules say, so I gave you back your memories." Because he loved him... and he knew Remy's situation wouldn't get any better if he sat and did nothing. The godparenting program and Jorgen weren't going to help, so Juandissimo - who LOVES Da Rules - broke them.
We know Juandissimo returned those memories while Remy was on the island. That suggests Remy's parents had no intention to return to Dimmsdale... and presumably, they also didn't care Remy was missing school.
We know Remy got real clothes again at some point on the island, and we can assume he had food and a bed because his mom opened a luxury resort, but there's more a child needs... Schooling, medical care, social interaction with peers... everything about that situation just screams neglect. Serious neglect. "We literally do not care" levels of neglect.
Even when Remy's parents do return to Dimmsdale and care about his schooling again, they send him to a military school full of older kids and adults. And that seems at least a little reasonable on the surface - After all, Remy's been a brat, so of course they'd send him to a school for ne'er-do-wells - but that begs the question...
... What has he ever done to upset his parents?
Remy's envy leads him to be rude, sure. And he's presumably committing some kind of fraud or deception crimes in the background due to the implication in "The Big Bash" that he bribes people with checks, but puts stops on them later so they don't go through. These are things that happened when he was doing magical stuff away from home.
But all signs point to him being extremely respectful towards his parents even when they're very dismissive of him... even when he's been placed in terrible, scary situations like being shipwrecked on an uncharted island, not knowing if they'll survive. Remy is polite, does what he's told, never talks back, and volunteers to find food.
It's almost worse that his dad acknowledged Remy finding food was a good idea and still didn't lend a hand in that. The Buxaplentys are such concerning people, and that's just my recap of things that happened in Season 2 and Season 5.
According to Season 9's "Country Clubbed," Remy's dad hits "classless saps" with his limo on purpose every month - which sounds horrible even without the next part - and he does that so he has an excuse to invite them to the Fancy Schmancy Country Club and he and his friends can mock them (under the guise of allowing them access to the club in exchange for them not suing). He heavily implies he'd like to hit Timmy later since he didn't get him while hitting his parents.
That's really messed up... WHAT is going on in the Buxaplenty parents' heads?
The only slightly relieving thing from that statement is that presumably, they don't run over Remy because we can assume Remy isn't a "classless sap," but I don't think "choosing not to run your son over because he shares your wealth" is a real point in their favor.
I make no claims that Dale is a fantastic parent, but the weird thing is... I don't think Dale is outside the range of how other subpar parents in the FOP universe act. Except the Buxaplentys- They're pretty much the lowest of the low.
There are so many concerning things going on in the Dimmadome house, like terrible safety rails, and Dale does cut his son off, dehumanize him, and make him feel unwanted. This is all true.
But at least Dale knows Dev's name and calls him that. It's very possible he's aware of Dev's lactose intolerance (seeing as Dev had to get his allergy card from somewhere). At least Dale provided the au pairs to look after Dev and gave them the ability to cook and recognize when he wants a hug. Even if Dale doesn't go out of his way to hug Dev, he seems to like him enough that he's happy to clap a hand to his shoulder and talk to him. At least he seems interested in talking to him and hearing about his day.
Dale even tries to get Dev outside, but didn't snap at Dev when Dev lay down to play his game instead in "Stanky Danky." That was their father-son thing, though it would've been easy to leave Dev at home.
Dale arguably took charge of Dev's care during that event, seeing as the au pairs don't hover around Dev. idk if Dale made his 9-year-old walk home himself across a very busy road while he chased after Danky, but that's not the point.
The implication is that Dev tags along on Dale's walks to Signal Hill - and has done so many times - because Dev knows Dale's calls drop up there. It's implied Dev plays on that hill when his dad is on a call because Dev knows the grass makes you itchy if you roll down it. He'd probably played there recently since that was the first place to come to mind during the treasure hunt with Hazel, and he remembered the itchiness of the grass.
Dale even makes donations to Dev's school, which is more than the Buxaplentys ever did (See also, Remy likely missing school while shipwrecked).
Remy could die and his parents probably wouldn't spend a cent on his funeral... or get his name right in a eulogy without a lot of note-checking and effort. In fact, it wouldn't shock me if they hid his death so no one found out, because a dead son would be bad press.
Actually... It's very sad to imagine them putting more effort into hiding Remy's death than into caring for his life.
Shout-out to Chapter 10 of the 'fic "Buy Me Love" by DeliverUsFromEvie where Remy addresses two mansion employees by name, but they're confused to find out their boss has a kid and that said kid has been in the house this whole time. I think about it constantly. hey. what on earth.
This 'fic has one of the most brutal interpretations of Remy I've ever seen, and Evie has this and several other awesome works, so consider checking them out!
All of this said, there's something else that's interesting here, so let's talk "Turner Back Time."
I can't stop thinking about how when Timmy wished his ancestor (Ebeneezer) had decided to work with trains rather than dismissing them, that led to a timeline where the following things happened:
- Timmy's Dad still married his beloved Timmy's Mom (lol). Yeah, you're not prying him away from the love of his life for anything.
- Dimmsdale fell to ruin because Timmy's Dad wouldn't play the Rich People game right (Supporting the city's growth) and instead opted to drive trains off the tracks and crash them through buildings.
- The Turners lived in a mansion, but Timmy's bedroom is exactly the same, presumably because in the timeline where his family's rich, he needed a safe space untouched by his parents' branding.
- Despite Timmy's effort to become miserable, Dad kept showering him with affection and toys, so Timmy didn't qualify for fairies until he was tied to railroad tracks with a train hurtling towards him.
- The first thing Timmy did in his attempt to become miserable enough to qualify for fairies was decide not to eat... Same energy as when he felt guilty and refused to sleep in Season 1 ("Dream Goat").
There is something here about Timmy's Dad ignoring the train system, but being attentive to his son, while the Buxaplentys ignore their son, but Dimmsdale isn't in ruins.
I'll say 1 and only 1 positive thing about the Buxaplentys: At least their trains are on the tracks instead of careening through hospital walls. Honestly, the bar is so low, it is below the floor.
Timmy's Dad became a greedy person in that timeline, but he still chose to marry someone of lower social status, have a son, and be kind to his son- He's happy to greet him, encourages him to enjoy their wealth, and gifts Timmy lots of nice things. In that timeline, it's the Turners who have generational wealth. Dad was raised by generations of Turners and he still makes time for Timmy. Come on, Buxaplentys... Is it THAT hard to speak to your son like you're happy he exists?
Closing Thoughts
The Buxaplentys are definitely an old money family while the Dimmadomes and Ed Leadly give off new money energy (to me).
Neither Doug nor Ed was seen at the Fancy Schmancy Country Club in S9's "Country Clubbed." All the people who were there have names that play on wealth. They also dress in a much more "upper class" way than Leadly with his flashy yellow suit or Doug with his Southern/Western theme.
The Dimmadomes represent business-related wealth and big company vibes, and I'd call them eccentric. Compare Doug's precariously perched cliffside estate (S3's "Engine Blocked") to Remy's telescope-
I really hope he decorates that hat for the holidays
The energy I get from this is "Doug doing whatever he wants just because he can"... which is also the impression I get from the "Crock Talk" scene that shows his hat stretching through the limo roof. Doug does business things and hosts events, but keeps to himself unless he's doing business things.
Comparatively, Leadly is all-in on his pencil branding, and the Buxaplentys flaunt their wealth in everyday life. As in, they buy the most expensive version of anything they want and like to showcase their wealth.
But while Doug and Dale have "Do what I want" energy, the Buxaplentys seem more restricted by social expectation.
That is, the Buxaplentys dress very nice and dine with fancy people- even their 11-year-old wears a tux, bowtie, and cummerbund. Buxaplentys are very "Flaunt wealth & do what people expect of us." They don't go out of their way to do "silly, eccentric" things like putting a hat on their mansion, but they sure will buy golden, diamond-studded things.
Well, that wraps up my analysis on Dimmsdale's wealthy families, who each intrigue and frighten me in their own unique ways... whether that be money laundering, holding back a magical forest, or being absolutely awful parents.
Thanks for reading!
#Fairly OddParents#Dev Dimmadome owner of anguish#Dale Dimmadome owner of Dimmadome Global#FOP#Remy Buxaplenty#FAIRIES!#Ed Leadly#ridwriting#Doug Dimmadome owner of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome#Listen... I know it's mean but the running gag of Timmy's Dad being madly in love with his wife-#while Timmy's Mom prefers material objects and her garden and these two facts are brought up multiple times across the series#It just cracks me up... She married him because he's fun and they did activities like hunt ghosts together but we can't forget-#- that she dated Dinkleberg before her husband (and liked him even as a kid) and Timmy's Dad was so upset about losing her-#-in the “Father Time” alt timeline that by his own admission he “dove into denial and forced everyone to do the same” by brainwashing them#Like ?? idk every time we get an episode where we blatantly see how much he adores her and meanwhile she “settled” it's funny#screenshots#The Boss of Me#Turner Back Time#Perfect pink beaver boy#Thaddeus and Dominika#Eyyy Hartman gang!#We don't use that tag much#Cherry lemon ship tag#<- Dimmadome-Leadly musings#A New Wish#Long post
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Sissy School, Pt. 1 (Story)
"Aww, look at my wittle Brandi,” I cooed, grabbing her by the chin as she kneeled on the ground next to me, “all teary-eyed and whimpering. Don't be sad, my precious cupcake! Mommy has found the perfect place for you, thanks to all the amazing girlies in my online forum. They told me about this super special nursery, just for sissies like you! All their little girls go too! Daddy Conner's new promotion means I don't have to work anymore, but that doesn't mean I want you under my feet all day. So, Daddy and I decided it's time for you to go to Sissy School!"
I smiled, running my fingers across her cheek, and continued; "Today, we're going to tour your new school and you better show me your best behavior princess! You don’t want me to have to tell Daddy you were a bad girl, right?"
My poor little girl, she was trying so hard to nod and wipe away her tears while gagged with that cute pacifier. She's such a crybaby, always whimpering and sniveling. We pulled up to this seedy-looking abandoned strip mall, and almost missed it, with its tinted windows and black paint. It was right next to this wild knock off of Chip and Dales strip called 'Hunks’. I've had some wild nights there, let me tell ya! But this sissy kindergarten didn’t sound like it would be as fun for Brandi as the strip club was for me!
"Welcome to Hunks and Huggies!" I heard a bubbly voice exclaim as the door swung open. The college-aged girl smiling at us was hot. Her dark hair had the perfect beach waves, her skin was flawless, even her eyes sparkled! I just had to stare! God, some girls get it all, even her body was perfect! Her short black “Huggies and Hunks” crop top was so tight you could the outline of her nipples, and they're hard as rocks! The matching black short shorts were barely there. She was showing off her perfect ass and long, toned thighs. I might need to get this girl’s number later! If Brandi wasn’t gagged with her penis-paci I’m sure that little sissy’s tongue would be on the floor right now.
"I'm Ms. Becky!" She introduced herself with a smile, her perfect teeth flashing. "You must be Heather," she continued, giving me a quick hug, shit she even smelled amazing! "And this adorable munchkin," she leaned over and pinched Brandi's cheek, making my sissy squirm, "must be Little Miss Brandi! Why don’t you two come in, I’ll show you around!” She giggled, grabbing me by the arm and whisking us inside.
Stepping inside Hunks and Huggies was like walking into Brandi’s worst nightmare. The whole place was decked out in pastel pink and white, like a little girl’s nursery had exploded. Even the carpet was a somehow perfectly maintained pink! The walls were covered in pink and white stripes, and there was even a banner that spelled out “Welcome to Sissy School!” In building block letters! I had only seen the entrance so far and I just knew it was perfect! I could already see Brandi trembling in her diapers and sobbing behind her gag.
"This," Becky giggled, seeing my shocked expression, "is the main entrance. Our 'students' get to meet all four of us teachers here every morning!" There were more of her? Lucky Brandi! "That door over there," she pointed at a pink door with foam letters that read "Bad Girls Only," "is the detention room. Don't worry, I won't spoil the fun. Brandi will tell you all about it after her first visit!"
A terrified squeak came from my gagged little girl, who was definitely not into the whole 'detention room' situation. I giggled, loving how scared she was already. "Did you say Hunks and Huggies?" I asked, still taking in the over-the-top pink decor.
Before Becky could answer, we heard muffled cries from behind the 'Bad Girls Only' door. Brandi's trembling intensified, and I knew she was freaking out.
"Oh, don't worry about that," Becky said, her hand on Brandi's shoulder doing nothing to comfort her. "That sissy is being punished for very being naughty. But you're a good girl, right?" She looked at Brandi, who nodded frantically, too terrified to make a sound now.
Becky turned back to me with a mischievous grin. "Yes, Hunks and Huggies. The owner of Huggies Sissy School is an amazing businesswoman, she also owns the Hunks strip club next door! It provides some ahem unique benefits for us teachers." She leaned in close, her breath tickling my ear as she whispered, "And some not-so-fun benefits for the students, but we'll get to that later!"
"Let's continue the tour!” Becky giggled, taking my hand and leading me with excitement. Brandi was struggling to keep up, crawling pitifully on the fluffy carpet, her pigtails bouncing. "This is the playroom!" She announced with a bright smile. "I know you'll just adore it!"
As we stepped into the "playroom," I was in for a major surprise! No jungle gyms or swing sets here, but there were definitely some fun toys to play with. The room was so perfect! Of course it was painted in the same soft pink and white as the entrance hall, and had the same fuzzy pink carpet. But there were so many fun toys, it was going to make my little diapered cuck miserable! If my little Brandi didn't enjoy her nursery at home, she would absolutely hate playtime in this place.
"Our lucky little girls spend at least two hours a day in the playroom for recess," Becky giggled from the doorway, reading my mind. "As you can see...", she said nodding across the room.
In the corner of the playroom, there was this giant pink bouncer, the sort of thing every sissy nursery needs! And inside, struggling like a sad little bitch, was this naked sissy, covered in sweat and crying her eyes out. Her hair was a total matted mess, and her makeup was running down her face. The little bitch was such a hot mess! "Oh my god!" I laughed, "look at that cutie pie!" I pointed at the poor thing, all tied up and helpless. "She's just so adorable!" The bouncer bounced up and down, making her tiny chastity cage wobble back and forth. And she had the cutest clamps on her budding little sissy boobs that were little bells! They jingling with every bounce. So. Freaking. Cute!
"Aww, why the long face, sweetie?" I cooed to the sobbing, gagged sissy, not really expecting an answer. “I’ve seen that look before, does she have a little botty-friend in?" I winked at Becky, who just shrugged and giggled.
"Yup, this lil' sissy is gonna pop her cherry soon! Her mommy's new man is packing, so we're giving her the full prep treatment!" I glanced at Brandi, who was trying to disappear into the floor, probably thinking about the massive plug she had at home. Of course, this meant I would be buying her an even bigger one for school, but that could be a surprise for later!
Becky strutted across the room; “and this,” she said, flashing a cute smile, “is our toy box!” I watched excitedly as she lifted the lid of the most adorable toy box ever. It's pink and white, and even had a heart painted on the front! "Every princess needs her toys, don't ya think?" She asked, watching as Brandi's eyes nearly popped out of her head. “What do you think Brandi?”
Inside the box was a collection that would make any dom proud and sissy blush: so many different size paddles, some were leather, some were painted with girly designs, one even had “sissy” carved into it. I’m sure that would leave a mark! There were floggers and whips that promised a sting, and even the largest assortment of dildos I had even seen! “Don’t be jealous Princess Pampers,” I giggled at Brandi; “but I think they might have even more toys than you do!” I couldn’t help but hold some of the larger ones up just to show my sissy. There were a lot! There were so many colors, some were ribbed or had a point, others were realistic; they had veins! “I think you’ll have so much fun with these, Brandi!” I laughed, as she whimpered.
Becky flashed me a knowing smile before leaning over to speak to her future ‘student’. "Don't worry, Brandi,” she purred, “you'll be playing with these toys real soon." She points out a white rocking horse next to us, painted white with pink trim. It would have been perfectly innocent if not for the massive ribbed didlo in the saddle! "That one's gonna be a wild ride, girl!." She giggled, I could see Brandi's bottom lip quivering, the poor thing. "And check out that X-frame, it's just dyin' to have you." We all looked at the intimidating restraint, also pink of course!. "But first, let's go see my favorite part."
In the center of the room was an adorable yet cruel looking “crib”, if you could call it that. It was certainly a fucked up twist on a one anyway. It was painted pale pink and white to match the rest of the room, down to its pink sheets and blankets. But unlike any other crib I had ever seen, except the one Conner built for Brandi of course, it had a top on it like a cage! Inside, the crib were two, I had to assume, absolutely miserable sissies. Their faces were wrapped in diapers, and they were handcuffed on top of each other, struggling in a cute little 69..
"So, these brats were bugging Ms. Staci for diaper changes,” she explained with a smile. “We don't do changes here often, ya know? So, I guess Staci decided if they wanted out of their diapees so badly, they could wear them somewhere else instead! Of course, I'm not sure if it's their own messy diapees or someone else's, but it's fun, for us, either way!" She looked down sweetly as the trapped pair. "This crib is my favorite! Did ya know it can fit three sissies stacked on top of each other at once? It's way more fun when there's more crying and begging. You know, sharing is caring, right?"
“They’re wearing each other’s,” Another absolute bombshell, college aged girl said, standing in the doorway. She had the most striking features, long legs, and blonde hair. She was also dressed to kill in the same revealing outfit as Becky—short shorts that showcase her perfect ass, and a low-cut crop top with the "Huggies and Hunks" logo, leaving little to the imagination. I could see everything through the fabric of her shirt, which I’m certain Brandi would notice too! She added, absolutely full of disdain; "they're wearing each other's diapers. They'll keep 'em on until they clean 'em or fill their new ones. I’m Ms. Staci,” she smiled at me and then sneered at the sissy next to me; “who’s the new loser?
I introduce my pathetic ex, "This loser here is Brandi." Staci gave Brandi a once-over, clearly not impressed. I mean, who would be? Noticing their matching outfits, I ask, "do you girls always dress like this?"
Becky shrugs, "Most days, but on 'Fun Friday,' we break out the sexy lingerie. Gotta give the sissies something to drool over, especially when they've been denied for weeks." I can't help but smirk, imagining Brandi's misery knowing she’ll be tormented by these hotties. It’s been months since her last sissygasm and won’t be getting to make cummies anytime soon either!
Becky claps her hands together excitedly; "Staci and I can give you the rest of the tour together and fill you in on our very strict rules." As we leave the room, she snickers; "you’ll see our girls in their uniforms soon enough. Every student is required to wear one!" On our way across the entrance hall toward a room labeled “Moviez 4 Sissiez”, Becky begins to run through a list of school rules. “All girls must be in uniform at all times, obviously. Dententions for being out of uniform are very harsh, also obviously. The girls must come to school each day with their supplies, which may change depending on the lesson, uhh…oh!”
Becky turned to speak to Brandi directly, "Oh, and little one, you'll be on an exclusive 'cum-only' diet here!" The look on Brandi's face was priceless. I almost felt bad for her! She already eats a lot of cum at home, but at least I still gave her table scraps...for now. She winks at me, assuring; "we just ask mommies to save condoms from their real men. We've got plenty extra though, don't worry." Then, leaning in close to Brandi, she smiled; "you’ll never go hungry, princess. We'll keep you nice and full."
The theater room was honestly kind of gross. Staci confessed as we walked into the small room; "this used to be a viewing booth in an adult bookstore when this whole place was a strip mall. We kept it nasty as a fun little tribute." I spot shelves filled with gay porn and femdom DVDs with titles that I’m sure made Brandi squirm. "Sissy's BBC Training" and "Mommy's Strap-On Slave." Magazines like “Rockhard” were stacked on shelves, and in the center of the room was another surprise for both Brandi and I.
A sissy, tied up tight, laid diapered wearing a pink frilly dress with a matching diaper cover. Of course, she had the most adorable paci strapped in her mouth. Another young beauty, a dominant sounding babe with red hair, was standing behind her. This new teacher was holding the sissy’s head in front of the screen with one hand and holding a vibrating wand to her diapered crotch with the other. “Don’t you dare look away you fucking loser!” She was laughing each time her diapered prisoner tried to turn her head away or close her eyes. “Ooh!” The ginger bombshell giggled, quite literally prying the poor, helpless loser’s eyes open, forcing her attention back to the recording; “this is my favorite part!”
On the screen, is the most perfectly round ass I had ever seen. I was jealous and turned on! Oh gawd, It's tight and firm, totally spankable. It making my mouth water, I couldn’t imagine what it was doing to the poor thing having to watch, or even Brandi! "Hey there, sissy," a sexy voice cooed from the recording. "You always loved my ass, huh? When you were my big stwong husband, you used to love watching this ass bounce on your cock didn’t you? Now that you’re a wittle sissy, I guess you’ll just have to watch it bounce on someone else’s…” The owner of that incredible ass turned and winked at the camera; a 30-something with the deepest blue eyes and her blonde hair in a high ponytail. I think she was about to put on a show.
“Sometimes,” Staci whispered, clearly enjoying herself, “a mommy will send us their ‘home movies’ to share with the class or just to torment their cucks. This one's getting a private show." With a giggle, the woman on screen bent over, revealing a sexy, heart-shaped tattoo on her lower back, just above her perfectly toned butt. She crawls onto the bed, her long, toned legs on full display and beckons off camera with a playful finger and a moan. In the corner, I could just make out a very well-built black guy. Wow, the only thing bigger than his muscles was his dick! This girl was very lucky! He had his massive black cock in his hand and stroked it slowly. The blonde teased him, wiggling her ass. I could hear the gagged sissy in the center of the room whimpering and crying.
"You ready big boy?" she teased, looking back at the camera with a wicked smile while talking to the bull. "Come and get it, baby. You own this pretty white ass now..." This really got the waterworks going from the helpless cuck watching, the redhead doubled her efforts and held firm, forcing her charge to watch as the scene heated up. The hunk didn’t need any further instructions, stepping behind her and the whole room watched as the blonde’s eyes went wide and she moaned. “Ooooh, fuck! Ooh! Jesus baby, y…you’re big!”
“Let’s leave her to enjoy the show,” Becky smiled, closing the theater door, “and let’s go see the classroom. Hmm?” She asked, smiling down at Brandi. The poor thing turned pale and tried to protest, but I grabbed her pigtails, giving them a rough tug, pulling her behind me. She cried softly as we followed Ms. Becky's click-clack heels down the hall. "Almost there, loser," Staci giggled, stopping in front of the door to speak to Brandi. "This is, like, my favorite part! We show you all the awful shit we’re going to do to you and you can’t even stop it! You're gonna hate it, I promise!" I could see Brandi's knees shaking. Poor, dumb little thing.
Ms. Becky dramatically flung open the door with a smile and pushed Brandi inside. "Welcome to class, Brandi," she giggled. "You’re gonna have so much fun!" The room was the most fucked up thing I had seen so far, and I mean that in the best possible way. Everything, and I mean everything, was pink! The walls, the carpets, even the damn windows.
"Oh, Brandi, look at that! They really went all out with the color scheme," I mocked as she sobbed at my knees. "But just wait till you see the lessons they have planned for you, my little sissy baby." I giggled, noticing the pink chalkboards and the lessons written on them. "Cock Sucking 101, hmm?” I teased, reading the board off to her; “oh, I just know you’ll get an A+ in that! You’re a great little cocksucker! We all laughed watching Brandi crumble to the floor, sobbing like the pathetic little girl she is.
"Aww, does my wittle sissy need a time-out already?" I teased, grabbing a handful of her hair and pulling her up. "But we just got here! Oh my, look at these!” I could hear Brandi groan and whimper as I dragged her towards the center of the room; “aren’t these just the cutest little desks and chairs! How adorable!" I giggled, pointing at the ribbed dildos attached to each chair. “You’ll definitely be sitting pretty, won’tcha Princess Pampers?” Brandi’s eyes went wide, she turned pale, and of course she instantly crumbled back to the floor. I just let her be. After all, she had plenty of time to enjoy her new school! The cutest touch was the name tags on the desks. Pink of course, written out in girly handwriting, the “I’s” all dotted with little hearts, so precious! Of course, the names were my favorite; I could see “Sissy Slut,” “Jizz Breath,” and “Cumbucket”! I hope Brandi got such a cute nickname!
The walls were just as extra as the rest of the classroom. There were huge posters of hunky half naked men covered with lipstick marks, pictures of gorgeous women naked but pixelated of course, and a cute full length mirror with the phrase, "who's the queerest of them all?" written in hot pink lipstick in the corner, Becky stood to the side, clearly proud of her workplace! "This," she giggled, "is where the magic happens. Where we transform whiny boys into obedient baby bitches! As you can see…”
"Check out these two cuties!" I exclaimed in giggles, noticing what Becky was pointing to. I pulled Brandi up and pointed at the two sissies kneeling in the center of the room, surrounded by the pink desks. They were dressed to impress in the cutest little schoolgirl outfits. Their plaid skirts were way too short, showing off their pink Huggies pull-ups, their eyes were were covered with pink blindfolds, their hands trapped behind them with pink cuffs, and their pigtails were held by matching pink bows! And I absolutely loved their crop tops with "sissy slut" in glitter across their chests, of course.
"Oh, Brandi, honeybun, aren't they just adorable? I can't wait to see you all dressed up just like them!" I mocked, knowing how much he hated this. "Don't you just love their fashion sense? I bet you're dying to join their little sissy club, aren't you?" I teased, as Brandi's sobs turned into desperate whimpers.
Staci knelt next to Brandi and wiped away the sobbing little sissy’s tears. I think she was having almost as humiliating Brandi as I do! I knew I was going to like her! "These are your Sucky Exams, princess,” I could barely hear her whispering over Brandi’s sniffling; “you’ll take them every week! The goal is to be the first little girl to make your man cum. If you're a good girl and pass, you get a fresh diapee! But if you fail, well...let's just say you'll find out in the detention room!"
“Sucky exams…?” I asked, before the classroom door opened again. I was in awe as two tall, chiseled hunks, with arms the size of Brandi's thighs and cocky smiles walked in. Oh, they were hot! I think Brandi was so scared she may have pissed herself just seeing these two! “Oh,” I giggled, almost to myself, “sucky exams!” These two wasted no time, each one grabbing a sissy by her pigtails and pulling her towards their bulging package. Brandi's eyes widened watching as these two little sissy sluts were about to be used for their intended purpose.
The sissies, now reduced to a trembling mess, opened their mouths defeatedly and allowed their throats to be invaded. “Look at them go,” Staci giggled over Brandi’s shoulder, watching the helpless sissy being throatfucked deep and hard. I could barely hear her over sounds in the room. “Look at the eye contact,” Staci giggled wickedly, “and listen to all that moaning, they’re such good little sluts!”
“You lucky little girl, getting to watch,” Becky had leaned over Brandi’s other shoulder now; “look at them, even through all the tears, being the best little sissy pornstars they can be! Ya know, with Hunks right next door, there’s, like, an endless amount of dicks you’re going to suck, every day!” Even over sissies’ muffled moans and the wet, slurping noises, I’m sure Brandi could hear each word; “we hope you’re excited for your first day of school!”
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Chicago's Kindest | Blurb #02 - Good.
logline; sometimes you just need to hear someone else say it.
[!!!] series history; not a new chapter!! but like, it's fun, and it's better than the nothing you've been getting, eh?
portion; 2k, just over.
pairing; A platonic Rich & Chip fic, for the boys
tasting notes; a pepper of hurt? a bunch of comfort? I'd describe it as fluff, I think.
possible allergies; this blurb is AFTER the next chapter coming out whenever it comes out (Chapter 16). So. Get into that grindset man. there's a fun thing in this hinting at a fun thing to come !! so!! have fun!! You should definitely read the other chapters in the series before this!!
Not a new chapter baby I'm sorry! But I was noodling around this idea, and I think perhaps you may like it. Should blurbs go on the masterlist? Idk.
When you finally tell Richie he's a good dad, it's when both of you least expect it. Mostly because you weren't trying to tell him at all that day.
It's January. About a week before the Taylor Swift concert. About a week into back to back to back reservations. Richie’s been burning the candle at both ends— He always gets tipped well, so it's not like it's not worth it. He's fucking Richie. He's the go to. He's good with people. ...Right?
Richie might care too much, might write himself in the schedule too much, might cover for wait staff at a moment's notice too much, might do research on guests in his off hours too much, might push himself to be present at every waking moment too much.
He wishes Carmen noticed, he's certain Carmen doesn't.
He's taking two personal days for the concert. How dare he? He wouldn't do it under normal circumstances, but his sweets takes priority.
Carmen, his Highness, will certainly notice time-off before anything else. Fucker.
To make up for it, Richie's working a double shift today. And he's made a ten-page pamphlet on all the reservations and details of the guests that'll be coming in while he's gone. He's good. He's Richie. He's a really good manager, a stellar host, fantastic with people.
Is he a good dad?
Probably not. Because he scheduled his make-up hours and didn't think to double check his custody hours. Deadbeat. God, fuck you, Carmen.
It wasn't entirely his fault. Tif asked if he'd want the extra weekend since something about wedding planning came up. And he did, he always does. More time with Eva is good time with Eva.
And usually he's very good at plugging that into his calendar but he got the call at a very busy time on his shift and he just said yes before actually putting it in and then forgot— Who remembers anything that happens in a phone call? She should’ve sent him a summary email—it got away from him, suffice to say. Then Tif texted asking ‘Hey, when are you coming to pick her up?’ and then suddenly he's the bad guy? Deadbeat. Bad dad. Richie Bad News. Fucked accent. Fuck you, David. Fuck executive chefs all together, just write them all off.
He called around asking any and everyone if they could take Eva off his hands for just a couple hours, but Richie hasn’t really had many connections since his one connection kicked his bucket. The rest of his connections work the same hours as him, at the same fucked establishment as him.
Well, that’s what he thought, until he complained about this to you over the phone, first thing in the morning, before he’s set to pick up Eva.
“I could take her.” The words are lovely and jumbled. He can hear you shovelling scrambled eggs into your mouth. “Could just make Lu cover bar, he’s been wanting to test drive alone anyways.”
Excuse Richie, but he’s always been one to look a gift horse in the mouth. It’s a habit. “Isn’t the whole point of test driving to have someone watching you?” He wishes he was eating eggs too, but again, candle’s on fire. He’s choking down a Kashi bar and attempting to be happy about it.
“Meh.” Is all you reply. Meh. “He’s a talented ass chef, he can handle making some fuckin’ cocktails without me over his shoulder.”
Even still, he’s got to work out all the kinks. “Carmen’s gonna be pissed.” But you both know, while he’ll have a less than stellar day without you, he will have a fucking awful day without Richie.
“He will live.” There’s a moment of silence, as you finish chewing down your last few bites of breakfast. “…Would you please give me the gift of some long overdue Eva time, Rich?”
And when you put it like that, when you put it like he’s actually the one doing you the favour… Eva is dropped off at your place an hour before he has to clock in. It’s a touch hurtful how excited she is to spend a couple hours with you instead of him.
“It’s the return of the champ!” But he gets it, as soon as they arrive, and you’re out front on your stoop ready to throw fake punches at Eva like a boxing coach. “They said she’d never be back in the ring folks—” And picking her up. “But here she is, better than ever, ready to face any and every challenger! E-E-Eva!”
Easy for anyone to get excited at the idea of hanging out with you. He wishes he could join in for even a few minutes, but it’s not in the cards— Nor today’s packed schedule. Rich promptly and tiredly runs over everything you need to know for the day, leaning against your doorway as Eva runs around in your apartment.
“Full of energy today, get ready to be ever so slightly annoyed because she will not stop playing the why game today.”
“Hm.” You hum, not the least bit annoyed by the idea. “I played that a lot too, I think. It’s simply karma.”
There’s a sigh of a smile on Richie’s face. God he looks burnt out. You won’t prod, though your worried face does plenty on its own. “Can I make you a coffee or somethin’ before you head out, Rich?”
“No, no, it’s good.” He’s quick to shake his head, straightening up off your door. “I’ll get Copenhagen to make me somethin’, test drive, y’know?”
“A’right.” All you can do is shrug. “I will feed her the normal foods at the normal times, make her take her two naps, and we will be mostly screenless, if we can help it. But I think I fuck with Bluey more than she does, so…”
“I owe you.”
The reply is off the cuff, “No you don’t, just bring me back a dead plate or somethin’.”
Richie smiles and nods, but there’s a hesitation to it. And whether you notice it, or he even notices it himself, he’s not sure. But as you close the door, you peek it open, noticing something. You surprise the man, when you suddenly reach out and lightly slap his neck. You scratch at scruff that isn’t there, smiling.
He lined up his beard. Richie listens. Even when he doesn’t want to.
“Good man.”
You close the door with a smile, like you didn’t just blast open his brain. You know what to say even when Richie doesn’t know what he wants to hear. And all he wants to hear is good. Good job. Everyone sees the work you’re putting in. You’re valuable.
“What the fuck— Richard, no surprises—” “Shut the fuck up, shut the fuck up, of course surprises—” “It’s gonna make a mess—” “If Chip were here, you wouldn’t have a problem—” “Well she’s not here, isn’t she? She’s at home taking care of your kid—”
“W—Woah-holy-shit—” Syd has to elbow her way between Carmen and Richie— And a pinata— To break up this fight. “Way too personal too fast, straighten it the fuck up, Chef.”
She rubs her chest with her fist, and Carmen returns it, after a deep breath. A thousand yard stare towards no one, as he apologizes— Well, he never really says it, but when he says, “My fault. I’m hot.” He means sorry.
“You need… A second?” Sydney gestures over his general form. “Want to take your ten?”
“Five. Smoke break. Thank you, chef.” And he’s off. Double entendre. He’s always off, when you’re off.
Syd turns back to Richie. She replaces you as union rep, when you’re off. She doesn’t ask questions, she doesn’t refuse Richie and his pinata, she doesn’t say, ‘Good idea, Richie, Fantastic research on the couple at table sixteen, Good job finding out that they met at a chocolate museum in Brussels as teenagers on separate school trips. It was all worth it, and you’re so valuable.’
She just says, “I’m not cleaning it up.”
But no skin off his back, he shrugs. It’s not meant to be a thankless job, but it is. “Fair enough.” And he puts on his brightest smile, grabs a bottle of champagne off of your shelf, and puts on a fucking show.
When he’s finally finished, Richie does remember to grab you a dead plate. Well, more specifically, he grabbed a dead plate and then Carmy asked if it was for you, and when he said yes, the stupid loverboy fuck made him wait as he made you— And only you, a star worthy dinner. Yuck.
He ate your original dead plate in the meanwhile. Richie texts you all this, sending terribly unflattering photos of Carmen during the whole cooking process. You laugh, over text, and tell him you’ll leave the door unlocked for him— Despite as bad an idea as he thinks that is, he just texts back a thumbs up.
And when he finishes the exhausting day finally, and drives over to your place, and opens your door with one hand, tupperware in the other— He grimaces, as he can overhear his wonderful daughter playing the extremely aggravating ‘Why?’ game, with you, in the kitchen.
He quietly closes the door, not wanting to cause too much of a commotion. Neither of you seem to hear him, so he’s able to listen in.
“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why can’t I use the knife?”
Richie watches from the archway, just peeking slightly. You’re cutting carrots as a late night snack for yourselves. Your back is turned to him and Eva’s sitting on the kitchen counter. She’s not really letting the bowl you’re tossing the carrot sticks in get very full— She’s dipping them in ranch and eating them pretty immediately.
“Because you might get hurt.”
“Why?”
“Because you’ve got little hands, and this is a big knife.”
“Why?”
“Because weirdly enough, big knives always seem to be the cheapest at my grocery store— I really don’t get it.”
“Hm.” She kicks her legs in the air, thinking of her next line of questioning. “Why are you watching me tonight?”
Because Richie’s forgetful, a bad dad, a typical deadbeat divorcee with half a brain—
“Because I love you. Duh.” Well, of course you have to say that.
“Why?”
“Because you’re a good egg.”
“Why?”
“Because your dad— And mum— Made you into a good egg.”
“Why?”
“Because he’s a good dad.”
Oh. Thank God for Eva asking on his behalf, “Why?”
“Because he’s good.” You say it like it’s so simple, mind still focused on cutting carrots, like you’ve said something as easy as describing the weather.
“Why?”
“Well— I dunno, that’s like asking—” You put down your knife to pick up what’s left of your current carrot. “This carrot, why is it a carrot?”
“...” Eva can’t help but laugh as she answers, “Because it’s a carrot!”
“Exactly! It’s a carrot! It just is a carrot! You can’t ask a carrot why it’s a carrot— It’s just a carrot!” You chuckle in return, putting the carrot back down to chop it once more.
You shake your head as you answer, “You can’t ask why Richie’s— Why your dad is good. He just is. He’s good.”
If he were still alone in his car with his Kashi bar wrappers hearing this, he’d probably be crying into your tupperware.
But he’s here, so, can’t.
He takes a step into your kitchen— “Th—”
Immediately, you shriek, stepping in front of Eva as you turn around, knife in hand. No coherent words come out of you, just screaming, thinking you’re about to pay repentance for leaving your door unlocked.
He almost drops your tupperware, holding it up in what is either defense or an offering. “Not a third time, Christ, please God?!”
At least he knows that in a time of crisis, you can go to bat for his kid.
At least Richie knows his best actively alive friend thinks he’s a good dad; thinks he’s good.
At least Richie will think of your words instead of any execs first, in his head.
yippee!!!
one day i'll write romance for this guy, one day. maybe.
anyways. sorry for my absence!! i cannot say it will improve my loves. don't worry, we're still finishing CK, it has just REALLY gotten tossed down the laundry list. No one reads these, but, life updates:
Got a new job! In my industry! I'll be working part-time hours there, so I had to talk to my current job about going part time--- And they let me!! Lowkey was hoping my ass would get fired so I'd have more time for you and more importantly, the next thing i'm gonna write about. Alas. We ball.
NOT a we ball moment, PARENT GOT THE BAD DISEASE!!! (fuck cancer!!!) Send sweet thoughts psychically, but not through actual message or asks or anything because i DO hate talking about it, but yknow. that's taken up obviously: most of my time lately!!
so many parties in october man. having our housewarming party next weekend. yes i know it's weird to be normal in this state but that's sort of how life is. we have to keep going?? crazy .
anyways. Hopefully once I start my new position, I can have a concrete schedule for writing. But until then! I'll probably write you short blurbs whenever inspiration hits, so send in requests man!!
Not to be stupid but requests and just talking about writing instead of the big bad evil in my life will do WONDERS for my mental stabilty!! so come yap in my inbox about CK and make me write about it.
love you!!! bed time for me now jesus chrsit.
#blurb#chicagos kindest#richie jerimovich x reader#richip#richie jerimovich#the bear x reader#the bear fanfiction#the bear fx#the bear hulu#the bear
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crush | logan howlett x female reader
hi everyone! i wrote this for fun. it'll probably turn into a series of small chapters while i write my more hefty logan fic. i hope you guys enjoy!
warnings: reader's kinda horny i guess, sexy man, based on crush by ethel cain, 1.5k words (i wrote this in like an hour)
You’d seen him around town.
At the laundromat with the blinking fluorescent lights. At the dingy bar around the corner from the laundromat. At the gas station, filling up the tank of his red truck.
You never thought to say hi, never to engage with him in any way.
He created such a stir when he first arrived. No one moved to your town unless something was truly wrong with them. Most of the men had leering gazes and dangerous intentions, but not him. Never him. You were in his vicinity frequently, but never once did he attempt what many others had. All failures, of course.
You lived contently in your grandmother’s old home, moving there after her cancer took a turn for the worst a few months ago. When she passed away quickly after that, she left the house to you and you decided to keep it. It still smelled like cigarettes, the stench burned into the walls and carpet, but the smell reminded you of childhood trips to Kansas. Those trips were scorched to the back of your eyelids, forever being replayed. Everything was the same as when you were a child; the small Mexican restaurant, the old movie theater, the arcade that closed seven years ago.
Now, you sat behind the counter at the small antique shop you spent most of your days in. It was quaint, filled to the brim with every kind of knick-knack you could think of. There were crates filled with records and CDs, most scratched or completely unplayable. There were pieces of furniture, dusty mirrors, moth-eaten upholstery, chipped paint jobs, and broken hinges. The bookshelves that lined the walls of the store were stacked with books. You’d taken a few home in the past, knowing that they wouldn’t be missed.
And the clothes. There were racks on racks of vintage clothes. Most were out of fashion (even for the time they were made) or damaged. Still, you liked to play dress-up every so often.
The job was boring and mundane, but it paid the bills. The family who owned the store didn’t seem to have time to keep up with the place, so you managed the inner-workings of it.
Today, you watched cars go by, wondering when would be the best time to cut your losses and close for the day. Some days you managed to get more than a few browsers, but today was not one of those days. You had one person come in around lunch, but they looked for about five minutes before heading out.
Your mind wandered as you watched people walk by the storefront.
You thought of him. The man you saw everywhere. The man who never spoke to you, not even to say, “Excuse me.”
The man that just walked through the front door.
Eyes widening, you sat up straighter and calmed your heartbeat that suddenly thundered in your ears. “Welcome in! Everything with a blue tag is sixty percent off today,” you said with a bright smile.
He simply looked over at you and then continued his perusal.
You deflated. Harsh.
As he walked around the store, you felt like a live-wire. Every creak of the floorboards sent your heart spinning in your chest. You hadn’t felt like this about a man since you still called men boys. Being in your late twenties, that meant a very long time.
You grabbed a box of donations from the back room and moved to the floor to start stocking items on the shelves. You rationalized your decision to suddenly start restocking items after having a full day to do so by telling yourself that if you looked busy, he might feel inclined to buy something. You could nearly feel your nose growing by the second at that thought.
Moving through the rows of shelves and assorted items was second nature to you at this point, knowing where everything went in this mess of a store. You conveniently moved to the side of a shelf that viewed his aisle through gaps in the many items strung about. As you placed a silver mirror on the shelf, your gaze moved to watch his face on the other side of the rack. He was stunning.
You hadn’t had much time to analyze him; it was only small glances here and there in the time he’d been around. Now, you took your time. He was looking at an old book, bound in red fabric. It looked as if it had seen the bottom of a sewer. Luckily, he seemed to be making a careful inspection of the text, giving you enough time to look him over.
He was beautiful in a rugged kind of way. He looked like he worked with his hands; they were large and rough, with calluses around the fingers. His knuckles were prominent with sharp edges. You wondered what he did for a living. Did he move here to get away from city life? Was he a runaway circus performer? You internally smacked yourself in the head for the stupid thought.
He’d probably make the circus look sexy, though.
He had a large figure hidden by a flannel and white t-shirt. His attire pointed to him being a worker of the land. A farmer, maybe. That would check out with the truck you'd seen him driving around in. Always covered in mud with logs of wood piled high in the back.
His hair was a rich brown and you wanted to dig your fingers into it. You wanted to feel his beard against your skin.
What the hell is wrong with me?
You don’t have sex for so long that your brain goes fuzzy at the idea of a stranger’s beard scratching your neck. God. Get a grip.
You straighten your back and continue restocking things. Play it cool.
Soon, you fell into the rhythm of it, nearly forgetting the other person in the room. You moved to the bookshelves, loading more books onto the already strained wood. People really needed to stop donating things to you and start actually buying things. You’d be out of business by next summer.
As soon as you realized you needed to go back to the stock room to grab another box, you heard a grunt behind you. You nearly jumped out of your skin. You dropped the box you were holding and faced the man. Your mystery man.
He was so close, you could smell him. He smelled like smoke and sweat. You felt yourself salivate.
You looked him in the eyes for the first time. “Do you need help?” You asked quietly, scared that he’d run off if you spoke too loud, like a wounded animal.
“How much for this?” He asked, keeping your gaze. His voice was smooth.
You looked down to his hands, which were holding the book he had been examining earlier. “It doesn’t have a price tag?”
He shook his head.
Now you felt like you were being held under a microscope. The way his eyes ran over your face made you go red; you hadn’t felt this flustered because of a man in a long time.
“Okay, I can check at the front,” you said, keeping your quiet tone.
He just grunted again and followed as you led him to the register. You had a book of all the prices for things so that you could properly mark them. If you didn’t have the vague feeling that you were going to explode at any moment, you’d know off the top of your head the price of that tiny book. It was about the size of his hand, making you bite the inside of your cheek.
You opened the book and searched for the page with book prices. When you found the page, you ran your finger down the list.
Small = $1.99
When you looked up at him, you jumped a little. He was looking at you with such intensity, you’d thought he was going to have an aneurysm. It made your cheeks flush again, but you cleared your throat and said, “It’s $1.99. With tax, it’ll be $2.30.”
He nodded, putting the book down on the counter as he reached for his wallet. You read the book title: Frankenstein. “I love Mary Shelley,” you said as you reached for a brown paper bag.
He looked at you, his expression not revealing anything.
For some reason, you decided to keep talking. “It’s such a perfect analysis of ‘how far is too far’ in science and experimentation. I loved reading it in high school, I think you’ll really enjoy it,” you said, not particularly needing a response.
He placed the exact change due on the counter and looked you in the eyes as he said, “Thank you.”
Your heart fluttered. “You’re welcome…” You trailed off, hoping to God that he’d tell you his name.
He thought about it for a moment. “It’s Logan.”
You smiled. “I’m glad you stopped by, Logan.” You introduced yourself. It would be nice to have another person to say ‘hi’ to on the street. And you imagined he was thinking the same thing.
His face didn’t jump into a smile, but it didn’t look as harsh as it did when he first walked in.
And so began your crush on the stoic man who moved to town.
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When You Touch Me Like That (Jake "Hangman" Seresin x fem!massage therapist reader)
Self indulgent maybe, but who wouldn't want to get there hands on this man!?
Your boyfriend visits you at work and suddenly can't get his mind of one specific thing.
Warnings: 18+ only content, established relationship, jealousy, inappropriate massage therapist behavior, consensual kink, sexy massage, happy ending, unprotected pinv, dirty talk, very hands on...
~~~
He had brought you lunch that day. That's how this all had started. He'd hung out in the front office, the girl working the front desk said you were finishing up with an appointment and that you'd be right out. So he'd hung out in the office and waited.
Not long after he heard a door close softly and another door close a moment later. He could hear water running for a long while and then a few minutes later you appeared.
"Jake!" Your face lit up when you saw him and it did his ego good. "What are you doing here?"
Jake was in civilian clothes; boots, jeans and a size too small t-shirt with Wayfairers hooked in the collar, "Out early today, knew who had a busy day so…" He held up a to go bag from your favorite Deli
"God bless you." You walked straight up to him for a kiss and to retrieve your lunch.
"BLT with avocado and an egg, extra runny." He smiled as you took the bag from him to inspect, "Don't worry chips and salsa too."
By this point one of the other therapists had finished an appointment and was talking to the young lady she had been working on. The two of them and the front desk receptionist all seemed to be staring on in envy and Jake couldn't help but play it up a bit. Then he saw the man come down the hallway and walk up to you. He was an older man, definitly older than you, and Jake would guess older than himself as well.
"Thank's hon, amazing as always."
Jake watched him as he walked out the door, hackles raised.
"I'm sorry we're so busy, otherwise I'd say we could eat together." Your voice snapped him out of his murderous thoughts.
"I know darlin," He bent down to drop a kiss on your forehead, "Me and some of the guys are gonna meet up at O'hargens in a bit, I'll get some wings there."
"Day drinking on a weekday? Careful Lieuteant." You had given him a cheeky smile and one last kiss, "Thank you, I love you, have fun."
"Love you too, still want me to come over tonight?"
"Of course," You rolled your eyes a little but still smiled, "Don't get tou turnt up."
Jake smiled and slid his glasses on, "Please, Ferg is the one you gotta watch out for. I'm a boy scout."
Out in the parking lot Jake was still smiling. Until he saw the guy again.
Your appointment. He was sitting in his camaro with the top down and sweat already seeping through his shirt in the Pensacola sun.
Jake eyed the man as he walked to his truck and waited for him to pull out of the parking lot first. Jealousy wasn't something Jake dealt with often, only when it came to you. Mostly when someone was looking a little more than he cared for. Occasionally when Jake remembered that your job included touching people, specifically asshats like that guy.
The whole way to the bar Jake had been grinding his teeth, thinking about that guy and that he called you hon, apparently was a regular, and Jake was certain he wasn't getting regular massages for chronic back pain. Then somehow after a few beers with the boys from the squadron a wire had gotten crossed in his brain.
Which is how he ended up looking away from the game on tv and over to you where you were reading at the other end of the couch. "Darlin, would you give me a massage tonight?"
"Sure babe," You paused for a minute to finish a sentence in your book before looking up, "You sore or something?"
Your hands were amazing and you gave the best massages, Jake was lucky and he knew that. He had free access to you for every ache and pain a hard day of training or flying might cause.
Tonight though, that wasn't why he was asking. "No, not like that. Just... " Now that he'd started this he realized there was no good way to ask for what he wanted. "I mean, like, like a sexy massage."
You chuckled, you looked confused, but you gave him a smile. "Jake, what are you talking about?" As soon as the words left your mouth realization dawned on you, "Ohhh..." You looked him over carefully, "You mean like rub your back before we have sex?"
Jake dropped his head back against the couch, "Know what, don't worry about it, it was just a dumb idea anyway."
"What? No, babe" You scooted over to his side of the couch, "I think I'm just not understanding what you mean."
"Promise not to make fun of me?"
"I mean... no more than normal." You laughed but Jake accepted that answer with a sideways glance.
"So, I got a little jealous after leaving your work today, and then the more I thought about it..."
"Jake, you know when it comes to clients..."
"I know babe, that doesn't meen I don't...can't get Jealous." You both shared a knowing look, Jake was territorial to say the least. "Anyway I had a few drinks with the guys and I started thinking about something else..." When you didn't respond Jake took a deep breath and continued, "I mean like a happy ending kind of massage."
Now it was obvious you understood what he meant this time. You sat there, legs crossed on the couch next to him, and contemplated a few things. "Does that turn you on? Thinking about that."
"Apparently." Jake felt a little embarrassed and couldn't meet your eye.
"Since when?"
"I don't know, about 12:45 this afternoon."
That made her laugh a little, "Do you mean like role play? Or..."
Jake looked at her finally, "No, not like that. I just..." He looked at her hands and lost his train of thought.
"Jake," You brought his attention back and moved closer to him on the couch, now sitting on your knees with your elbow braced against the back of the seat. "You know how sometimes in bed... my brain kind of short circuts and I need something but can't get it out." When he continued to stare at the celining but nodded, you continued, "You make me slow down and take a minute, until I can tell you what I want." His eyes dart to yours and he nods again. "This is a time where you need to slow down and tell me what you want."
He sighed deeply and stared back at the football game, "It sounds stupid now that I'm trying to say it out loud."
You smiled, "I said the exact same thing the night I came back from my birthday party." You smirked when that brought his attention back, you could see him biting the inside of his cheek, "Remember how drunk and silly I sounded trying to explain to you what I wanted? Y'know the thing with the scarves and your..."
"Oh I remember." Jakes smirk doubled, relishing the tinge of pink in your cheeks.
"Well, that ended up not being stupid at all did it?" You asked as you moved to straddle his lap.
His hands grabbing your hips on reflex alone he grinned, "Definitly not stupid."
Your weight settled on his thighs you grinned back, "Now it's your turn, so spill."
~~~
Jake leaned against the door to your bedroom as he watched you change for bed. Nervous as he may be he still smirked to himself knowing full well if everything went well, you wouldn't need clothes to sleep in. "You're sure this isn't…" He momentarily trailed off as you shimmied out of your cut offs and did not replace them. "This isn't, like demeaning or objectifying or like, crossing some sort of boundary?"
You laughed and gave him a big bright smile as you crossed your bedroom to where he stood. "You know how I really," You ran your hands up his chest to wrap around his neck, "Really like when you come home in your uniform and let me… help you get undressed?"
He grinned and set his hands on your hips, "I do."
"Well, I think it's kinda like that." You scratched your nails over the back of his neck and smiled up at him.
Jake leaned down to kiss you, "You're amazing, y'know that right?"
"Mhmm," You grinned into the kiss and then pulled back the slightest bit, "Now, take your clothes off and get on the bed."
With a hint of a groan he pulled away, already turned on, "Yes ma'am."
When you came back from the bathroom with Jake's favorite lotion, which he denied to the bitter end, you found him face down in the middle of your bed, naked and tense. You couldn't help but giggle to yourself as you approached, "You look a little tense there lieutenant."
"Don't tease me darlin'." Jake grumbled into the pillow, arms folded beneath him.
As you climbed onto the bed and straddled his lower back, just as you normally did when you gave him a backrub, the thought occured to you that this was, actually, very different. Lotion in your hands you admired the expanse of muscle before you. "Thought that's what you wanted." You ignored his warning as you made the first firm stroke over his back, a palm on either side of his spine.
The muscles under your hands shivered and flexed and Hangman let out a groan, "Your hands are amazing."
Your cheeks flushed, you bit your lip as you worked over his lower back, up along his spine to his shoulders. You scooted back enough that you could dig your thumbs into the divots at the base of his spine.
Jake was always vocal in bed, but the way he groaned and ground his hips into the mattress emboldened you. You licked your lips and leaned down close, your chest pressed to his back as you whispered in his ear. "Feel good?"
"So fucking good." He groaned, face buried directly into the pillow, hips grinding more as you kissed and mouthed at his neck while your hands stroked over his bulging biceps.
How had you never done this before?
Bracing you hands against his shoulders you pushed yourself back up to a sitting position and began to work your way down his back. When you paused for more lotion you couldn't help but enjoy the way he fidgeted beneath you. LIke he was chasing after your hands, after your touch. You scooted back over his thighs and bit your lip, fighting back a grin as you swept your hands up his sides, strong fingers curling into his ribs and raking their way down over his waist and hips.
You continued down until you were at the backs of his thighs and then reversed direction and stroked over each of his glutes. His hips bucked into the mattress even as his muscles clenched under your touch, "Not that kind of massage darlin'."
You giggled as you drug your nails down over the small of his back and then over each ass cheek, "Maybe some other time."
Again, his hips rolled beneath you, but this time he chuckled. His voice muffled by the pillow he responded, "We'll see."
You continued to knead your way up his back so you could kiss and nip along his neck and shoulders, sucked his earlobe between your lips as moved one hand to stroke up and down the back of his neck before carding your fingers into his hair and massaging his scalp. While he continued to moan in to the pillow and writhe beneath you you smiled and whispered, "Roll over for me baby."
He moved so fast he nearly tipped you over.
You giggled as he steadied you by the hips only for you to swat his hands away, "No, touching."
Jake rolled his eyes, but let his hands settle plam down on the comforter. You purposefully moved to settle yourself over his lower abs, barely brushing his erection as you moved. He let out a long breath like it would help him keep his composure as your hands sarted back into his shoulders only from the front this time. Your thumbs tracing along his collar bone several times before you lifted one arm.
You moved it so his hand would rest on your shoulder as you massaged the muscles of his foream, his biceps and triceps and then back in long languid movements. You couldn't help but hum approvingly as the hand at you shoulder lazily moved to grip the back of you neck. Jakes thumb stroking over your pulse point in time with your massage.
You repeated the same with his other arm, your resolve to drag this out chipped slightly as he again took a gentle hold of your neck and caressed your skyrocketing pulse with the pad of a rough thumb.
"What happened to no touchin'?" Jake teased, his cocky tone a stark contrast to the half lidded eyes he gazed up at you with. Biting your lip you leaned forward, down, into the pressure of his thumb. His grip on your throat shiffting automatically as he held you.
After a brush of your lips over his, and the slight increase in pressure around your throat, you whispered, "Did I say that?"
He chuckled, squeezed your throat a little tighter as he kissed you, "You sure did."
"Oops." You winked at him as you easily broke his grip on your throat to pin his hand above his head.
Jake took the hint and brought his other up to join it, folding his hands behind his head and cursing under his breath when your hands began to work over his pecs. His hips jerked each time your thumbs would swipe over one of his erect nipples. "Fuck baby." His eyes were closed and the muscles under your hands flexed and tightened.
You couldn't help but lean down and lick over one and then suck, like he so often did to you. "Jesus, fuck..." A hand dug into your hair and clamped your mouth in place for a moment, urging you to continue licking and sucking at his nipple, biting it not so gently with your teeth before soothing the sting away with your tongue.
Then he was dragging you back up his body for a kiss. "No touching, remember?" You mumbled into his mouth.
He nearly growled at you in return, "I should have specified sweetheart, happy ending for me means I cum in your perfect, tight little pussy. Not all over my stomach." He kissed you again, his tongue sweeping through your mouth, his grip on your hair keeping your face smashed against his.
A giggle escaped, "This turning you on that much baby?" You pushed aside to kiss and lick your way down his neck, "I'm not even halfway done yet."
Jake spit out another, "Jesus Christ." As you licked over his opposite nipple and then began to trace the lines of his abs with your thumbs. You pushed back, over his cock, the feel of it hot and hard and oh so ready for you tempting, but you slid further, ignoring the way the his entire body rolled as you did so. His hand in your hair tightened quickly and then relaxed, like he caught himself.
You traded your thumbs for your tongue as you began to lick at the planes of his six pack, earning more cursing and another roll of his hips that had his cock pressing against your stomach. In response you moved to straddle one of his thighs and ground down against it, long and slow. Your wetness spreading over it as you finally, truly crossed over that line to make this way more than just a massage.
"Fuck, you're so damn wet darlin', I can feel it." His thigh flexed beneath you and his abs fluttered under your lips. He was not wrong, you were soaked, drenched, leaving a smear of arousal over his thigh. The coarse hair and thick muscle of it doing terrible things to your own self control.
"This the kind of massage you wanted Lieutenant?" Your own voice was breathy as you had made it to nip and kiss at his hip bone, your hips 'massaging' his thigh faster and harder.
"Yes, yeah baby, your hands," Which were currently occupied dragging your nails lighlty down his chest over and over, "Your mouth, fuck baby your pussy feels so good rubbin' on me like that." He thrust up against you again, chasing some sort of friction, some form of relief. His hands moved to the shoulders of your t-shirt. His t-shirt. "Take this shit off."
He drug the fabric off your body with no assistance from you and groaned when you shifted enough to let his cock brush against the soft, bare skin of your breast. WIth a long, wide lick you traced one side of the sharp cut v at his lower abdomen and he thrust against you again. When you moved, scrambled to settle on his other thigh and begin to give it the same treatment, you moved and licked another path up the opposite side of the v and Jake lifted his thigih slightly to add pressure.
"Need you to touch me darlin'." It almost sounded like there was a please at the end of that sentence that he couldn't quite bring himself to say outloud.
You smiled against his hp, "I am touching you babe." You registered the bolt of pleasure that shot through you before you really realized that it came from the harsh slap Hangman had laid across your ass.
You moaned and bucked forward, his thigh chasing you and causing you to hump aginst it even harder. "Smartass." He grumbled even as both hands settled on your ass to squeeze and caress the sting away. "Touch me."
The moan escaped without your permission and you realized you were going to cum. You were well and truly humping his thigh, riding it with your thighs spread wide and your clit rubbing over the muscle. "Oh shit, Jake, fuck..."
He realized too, one hand moving to grab yours and guiding you to his balls, "Go ahead sweetheart, cum for me, be a good girl and cum for me," His larger hand encouraged you to squeeze his balls, massage them the way he liked.
"You're supposed to...' A tremor cut your words off as the knot spun and spun low in your gut.
Jake chuckled, strangled as it was, "It's okay, you first then you can finish my massage, go ahead darlin', go ahead, that's right." He continued to encourage you as you chased your orgasm, riding his leg harder and faster, your grip on his balls tightening as the pleasure crashed into you.
Jakes free hand stroked over your back as you came down, soft and soothing even as his cock twitched with need in front of you.
"Jake..."
He smirked, "C'mere baby girl." He used the hand at your back to pull you up into a kiss while his other hand continued to hold yours around his balls. His fingers working with yours to roll and tug at them. Jake kissed you like he ate you out, his mouth wide and shoving his tongue deep, licking his way into every opening until you were even more of a moaning mess. "Need a minute?" He asked, voice a whisper when he finally pulled back.
You gave him a hallf giddy, hafl shy smile, "Why is this so hot?"
His smile grew, "I don't know, but I love that it got you off to baby." He kissed you again.
"Now it's your turn." You returned the kiss, "In this new fantasy of yours, how do I finish your little massage?" J
ake groaned, "Can I take back what I said earlier? About the roll play thing?" His smile was wide and happy but his green eyes were dark, pupils blown wide.
"Next time." You picked his lips.
He nodded, "Okay." He dropped his head back into the pillows and rolled his hips experimentlaly, smirking again when you shivered, "Want that wrecked little pussy to massage my cock baby. Grind on it like you did my leg, rub it real nice and firm. Want you to get off on it."
You bit your lip and hummed, slipped your hand away from his and his balls to drag a light finger up the length of him. "Thought you wanted to come inside me?"
"Oh, I'm gonna." He chuckled, deep and low in his chest, "You let me worry about that."
All you could do was whine in anticipation as you settled in place, your thighs wide over his hips as you lined up the hadrness of his cock between your lower lips and began to move. You were so sensitive and so wet that every inch of him was nearly too much. Forget that he wasn't even inside you.
All you were doing was rocking your hps, guiding your still trembling pussy from the base to the tip, pressing his cock between the two of you and biting your lip as the familiar sensation sitrred to life within you. You moved your hands to his torso, doing your best to move them like you had before. Slow, firm steady strokes meant to losen the muscle and drive him crazy at the same time.
Then Hangman began to match the motion of your hips with his own. An image flashed through your mind as his hips bucked up into yours, his abs contraciting under your touch with each snap of his hips. The idea of Jake on your table at work, the dim lights, the music, the incense and his skin warm and slick with oil. Your eyes fell closed. He would look so strained, like he was fighting to keep his composure, his control. He would have to keep quiet, you both would or someone would hear you.
It would be so unprofessional, but so hot. As a shiver skittered up your spine you leaned down, your hands sliding over his abs, brushing his nipples on the way up his hard chest. You placed your lips against his ear and tossed your earlier statement out the window. "I'm so embarrassed Lieutenant Seresin." You let out a shaky breath that was only slightly played up, "I don't..." You rocked your hips down hard, "I don't do this with clients, I don't know what came over me, you just... you just look so good, feel so good..."
"Holy fuck." Jakes hands dug into your hips and drug you down over his cock, hard. He swallowed audibly, "Oh sweetheart..." He stretched beneath you, fighting off a wave of pleasure, "Don't be embarrassed." He turned his head so he could mouth at your neck, "Can't help myself when you touch me, you make me so hard, so horny. You're such a good girl I know you don't do this for anyone but me do you?"
"Just you." Your hips stuttered and you wrapped your arms around his neck, "Nobdoy else, just you."
Jake growled, "You only get naked for me don't you?" He was thrusting up into in earnest now, sliding you back and forth over his cock, the head catching against your clit every so often causing you to whine. "You only touch me like this. You only get this needy for me."
"Fuck, yes just for you. I can't help it." "Neither can I sweeheart, can I have that pussy sweetheart? Your mouth feels so good, your hands feel so good, want to feel what that pussy can do."
You fought to keep up the act, "I shouldn't..."
His grip on you tightened, "Just for me darlin', it can be our little secret."
For whatever reason that gets you, so you push yourself up as much as you can and take him in your hand. Trying not to feel silly you stroke the length of him, "It's so big, and hard, it does look like it hurts."
You catch him grin and you know that even though he's nearly out of his mind with how bad he wants to fuck you, the line is cheesy and such a cheap porno thing to say but he loves it. "It hurts so bad baby, make it feel better for me, please sweetheart"
As soon as you nod he as you impaled on his cock and begins fucking up into you. The act was gone completely as he drags you down into an obscene kiss, "You're so fucking good to me baby." His hips are snapping into yours so hard and so fast, that he has to lock his arms around you to keep you in place, "You playing it up for me?"
You nod into his neck, words a mix of strgangled moans and syllables, "It, oh fuck Jake, I kind of like it."
"Damn baby," He grunts as he gives in and rolls you to your back, slamming into you, "Just for me? Just for me, right?"
Your eyes roll back in your head with the way his body and his words are overwhelming you, "Only you Jake, only you, only you..." Your mind shorts out, unable to say anything else as your nails dig into the muscles of his back, warm and smooth where you had stroked over them early, only now to claw deep red welts into him as you cum again with a straingled moan.
Jake has his face inches from yours, watching as you bounce and writhe beneath him and as your pussy clenches down on his cock and he feels the first wave of your orgasm hit he burries himelf deep and cries out your name. Over and over again between grunts and groans as he empties himself into you.
~
You can see the marks on his back from your spot in bed, your heart just now starting to slow, no longer pounding in your ears. You watch him at the sink where he rinises himself off quickly with the tap water as it warms. Not for the first time you wonder just how the fuck he is so good looking. Then when he catches you looking, his eyes dancing and his grin cocky but his overall expression goofy and satisfied you wonder how the fuck he is so in love with you. Jake gives you a wink as he tests the water and then dunks a rag under it.
When he comes back into the room to clean you up, it's a struggle to keep your eyes open as he works the rag over you. He takes longer than he needs, wiping down places where he never spilled a drop, just for the excuse to return a little bit of the favor. The hot towel and pressure of his hand soothing as it stroked over your hips and thighs before he dipped it between your legs.
With your eyes closed the kiss he drops against the dip of your hip makes you jump and he huffs out a warm laugh that slides over your skin.
"What?" You ask, voice barely a whisper.
"Just thinkin' how God damn lucky I am." He places another kiss an inch over. Not sexual in anyway, only adoring.
You chuckle, "I had just been thinking the same thing." You comb a hand through his already disheveled, golden hair and smile. "You're so lucky."
He laughs and nips at your hip bone before soothing it with a kiss. Then he's off the bed and back to the bathroom. Then the room is dark and the bed dips as he crawls in beside you. "Were you really…" His voice is just shy of steady, "Were you really thinkin' about it?"
You schoot back, smiling as he wraps his arms tighter, "Yeah…" You breath deep, "Just kind of, came over me."
Jake nodded behind you and placed a kiss to the side of your neck, "I wouldn't ever ask you to do this outside of the bedroom. You know that right?"
THe smile on your face widens, "I know Jake. I wouldn't mind doing it for your again, just so you know."
He hums, obviously pleased. "Next time you could call me Commander Seresin."
"Not until your promotion is official flyboy." You tease him, shifting your ass back against him as well.
He laughs again, deep and sincere and smooths a hand down your side to keep your hips close. "You didn't mind calling me Admiral when I put on my dress whites and tied you to the bed." He teased, nipping at the shell of your ear, "Sounded so pretty, all drunk and horny, calling me Sir and asking me to put a baby in you…"
You elbowed him hard in the ribs, "Well, the next time I call you Admiral OR ask you to… do that, there better be a Mrs. Seresin to go with it."
Jake turned you to face him and kissed you, slow and deep. "Don't tease me darlin'."
"I would never." You kiss him back, grinning into it until you pull back, "Never about that."
He kisses you again, "Admiral and Mrs. Seresin… is it bad i'm gettin' hard just thinkin' about it."
You shove him onto his back with a laugh, "You realize we'll be like.. what? In our fifties, at least."
His smile was wide and his dimples showed even in the dark of your bedroom. "If we hurry and get those babies on the way, they'd be out of the house by then…"
"We are not havin' babies until you are on permanent shore duty Hangman, you hear me."
"So, what you're sayin' is; I've got a few more years to get all the kinky shit out of my system?" He licked his lips and gave you a look.
"And to sort out that jealous boyfirend thing." You chided him.
"Darlin'," He pulled you down into a kiss, "You let me give you my last name, I won't have nothin' to be jealous of."
You kissed him again, nipped at his bottom lip as you pulled back and settled your head onto his chest. His arms coming around you again made you sigh in contentment.
~~~~~
Thanks for reading! Let me know what you thought!
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damn that leech sibling post really made me wanna make them sad, so can i request a scenario where reader starts ghosting them? basically just dodging them and their attempts at conversation, and one day the leech twins hear reader trash talking them. perfectly okay if you can’t!
I'm actually glad I get to do another part to the Leech twins one. This branches off from the original post
For those who didn't see the original leech twins sibling angst, you can find it here
Request rules and Masterlists
Leech Twins as siblings (Broken relationship: No forgiveness ending)
the two of them were spending an awful lot of time around you today and insisting on doing whatever you wanted to do
there wasn't any teasing or insults either
it was very...suspicious
you knew of Azul's magic with making contract and how clever they were at luring people in
so you were a little concerned that they wanted you to sign a contract
deciding not to dance around it you asked
"Are you guys trying to get me to sign a contract or something?"
Floyd was very blunt with his response
"Eh? What would we even need from you? You already work for Azul"
Jade was more polite
"We simply wanted to spend some time with you is all."
he smiled, but it wasn't his menacing one
it was a more genuine smile
they genuinely wanted to spend more time with you
but it was far too late for that
after years and years of being cast aside by the entire family and being called the boring little sibling by everyone was already enough
but then they had you working yourself nearly to the point of passing out every other day, all while they continued to make fun of you
and after all of that, they wanted to try and spend time with you now?
you're too tired to deal with this
to deal with them
you just can't anymore
so, without a word, you just turned and walked away from them
from then on, you did everything you could to avoid them
for about a week after that, Jade made consistent efforts to try and talk to you
he would often try to create conversation during your shifts at the lounge
usually it was about orders or certain customers
each time, you never responded or even looked at him, and continued working
but he was persistent and kept trying every chance he got
it's because of his persistence, everything that happened, and their presence at all that you decided to quit your job with the lounge
no longer would you see them on a daily basis
that's what you hoped
not to long after that you noticed Floyd "coincidentally" passing you in the halls or needing something from your classroom
and of course, he had to try and talk to you while you were there
you made a point to leave the room or pass right by him whenever you saw him
as soon as you left you could hear him grumble and sigh behind you
you were beyond exhausted of them at this point
each day they tried to talk to you seemed to chip away at your nerves
it didn't take long for you to finally express how over it you were
they finally gave up after hearing you talk to one of your classmates
the classmate mentioned wanted help with some of the tougher homework from class
they thought you were still associated with the twins and the lounge, so they came to you asking if your brothers or Azul would be able to help since they seemed smart
at that, you laughed
"Smart? I wouldn't call them that. If they've convinced you that they're smart, then they've managed to manipulate you just like they do everyone else. Those two can't even tell when someone doesn't want anything to do with them. They're pests that don't go away."
sure it may have seemed mean from an outsiders perspective
but they heard it, and they got the point
after growing up being the outsider, constantly ignored in the family, and deemed the boring sibling, they got a little taste of what you went through
but of course, they would never be able to feel the full extent of pain you went through because of them
they completely stopped trying to talk to you after that and finally, you could be away from them
there wouldn't be any chance of them hurting you again now
#twst#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#twst jade#jade leech#twst jade x reader#jade leech x reader#twst floyd#twst floyd x reader#floyd leech x reader
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DCAtober Day 14: Knock
Words 1,700+ Summary: You hang out with some friends, and try your best to make Moon's circuits fry, apparently
Somehow, you’d managed to drag your ass out of bed after a fruitless attempt at sleeping. It was 12:00 am, the moon was out, and you were exhausted. The constant switch between night and day shifts was starting to get to you. Since the layoffs, management had assigned you way more night hours, and you didn’t want to give them an excuse to get rid of you too.
The drive to work had you so zoned out it was a miracle you hadn’t hit anyone. Your walk inside is a daze, and you only register what you’re doing when you’ve been twisting the handle to the security office for so long you realise you haven’t unlocked it.
You grumble as you dump your stuff, pulling the staff lanyard from the hook on the back of the door over your neck and checking the alarm system. Thankfully, your list of tasks was blissfully short for tonight. Clean out Chica’s room, repaint Roxy’s nails (her PAs were all out with some unspecified illness, apparently) and check up on the Staffbots in the lobby and atrium. Since the outage a few weeks ago, there’d been an increase in reports of glitches, and Fazbear wanted to minimise the bad press.
You nod to Vanessa as you leave the office, having seen her enter at the front doors. She smiles back at you, waving enthusiastically. If your memory served you right, she’d been hired about a month ago, and only worked security shifts. She seemed nice enough, but you never had the chance to exchange more than a few words with her.
“Are you on the atrium today?” you call.
“No, I’m in the tunnels tonight. Something about a glitch in the cameras? I don’t know.” She shrugs, fiddling with her badge as she tries to pin it on her shirt. “Moon’s doing the rest.”
“Have fun in the tunnels, then,” you say, and she makes a face. “I’ll be by the main stage if you need me.”
“Thanks,” she says warmly, swearing when she stabs herself. She waves you off when you offer to help, and you oblige, taking the side doors to start the night off with Chica.
When you open the doors to Rockstar Row, you know he’s already waiting. You don’t bother looking up. “Hey, Moon Man. Did you miss me?”
Moon drops down inches away from your face, hanging from the roof upside down like spiderman. The bell on the end of his hat jingles. You jump, even though you expected his arrival.
“Not at all,” he chuckles, taking delight in your momentary terror. You playfully bat at his head, crossing your arms.
“Quit it,” you say in what you hope is a stern voice, but is definitely not. His faceplate does the usual spin, smile remaining in place. “You like scaring me too much. It’s like you feed on terror.”
Moon flips in the air until he’s right side up. He brings his hands up and wiggles his fingers, making his red optics shine brighter for added effect. His voice becomes gravelly, like nails on a chalkboard. “Of course I do, my dear. I’m the boogeyma-”
“Hi!”
Moon freezes, clearly having been caught unaware despite his usual constant surveillance of his surroundings. He turns to the side slowly, looking very much like he wants to leave right now. You’d laugh if you didn’t feel bad.
Chica is standing with Roxy, the chicken waving energetically just in case you’d missed her greeting while the wolf rolls her eyes, inspecting her nails with annoyance. Clearly she wasn’t coping very well with the sudden lack of PAs.
“I thought you two would be hanging out! Roxy’s been waiting for ages and she’s getting desperate.” Chica looks to Roxy expectantly, and the latter shoves her hand in front of your face for you to inspect.
“They’re chipped from the keytar,” she huffs. “I need them repainted.”
“We got the paint and stuff all ready!” Chica chirps. “It’s in my room. I’ll clean while you do her nails.” she grabs your hand excitedly. “It’ll be like a slumber party.”
Moon is hanging awkwardly in the air, playing with the ribbons around his wrists. In some aspects, he really was like Sun. Chica gasps and looks at him.
“Oh, and you can come too, Moon! I wouldn’t want to separate you two.” She gives you a sly grin as she says this, and you shoot her a glare back. Moon is too anxious to be aware of what she’s saying, and Roxy just doesn’t care, but still.
“I…”
You give him an understanding look. “It’s okay, I’m sure you’ve got a lot to do.”
Chica looks much too upset for her offer to not be steeped in an ulterior motive. “No! We haven’t hung out in ages! Come on.”
“I have patrols to do,” Moon says, clearly grateful for your out. Roxy rolls her eyes.
“If the cheese head doesn’t want to see us, let him miss out.” Moon’s eye flickers black for a moment, and his grin strains. You knew him and Roxy were on… rocky terms, after watching him dump a bucket of water from Gator Golf on her head when she went searching for her bracelets one night, and when she’d flipped the light switch after trapping him in Kids Cove (it had taken you about an hour to get Sun to calm down). “Can we just get on with fixing my nails?”
You give Moon a smile. “I gotta check on the Staffbots after. See you then?”
He nods, before shooting up into the rafters and out of sight. Chica seems very disappointed, but she drags you back to her room to get started with your tasks anyway.
You pull a stool over to the vanity and begin, doing your very best not to get the paint anywhere but where it was supposed to be. It was hard, considering Roxy liked to talk with her hands when she got mad, and Chica had brought up Monty hiding her hairbrush, but you were nothing if not patient. Also, you were terrified of her, so that helped you stay steady.
Chica continues her gossip as she cleans the room, gathering trash into garbage bags and leaving them by the door. Thankfully, the trash was inedible, so she wouldn’t be sticking her beak into it tonight. “Ooh, did you guys hear that Adam got caught cheating on his wife?” Adam was a supervisor for the Staffbot production. Roxy gasps dutifully. You scrunch your eyebrows together as you maneuver the paintbrush over to a particularly tricky spot. “Yeah. She came here to meet him last night! But his wife was visiting with the kids.”
“Oh, that’s vile,” Roxy laughs.
“I know! Anyway, that’s why they closed off the car park. There’s stuff everywhere. She went off, somehow she got to the paint buckets!”
Speaking of paint, you were finally done with the last coat on Roxy’s nails. You slide her hand under the dryer and stretch. “Adam’s a bastard anyway, it’s not like this was the first time.”
“Ooh, do tell,” Chica squawks, pausing from tying up another bag (this one filled with broken crayons and old autographs they can’t legally give out anymore) to look up in excitement.
Unfortunately for her, a knock at the door cuts you off. Then another, and another increasingly annoyed one over the fact the door is not sliding open, and then a thud.
It opens automatically, as it does when there’s security cleared movement on the other side, and the three of you are greeted with Moon’s upside down face. Ah, no wonder the door didn’t register him. It scanned the floor for any movement. “You’re late,” he says shortly.
You check your Fazwatch. He was right - it was 1:30, and your shift ended at 4. You get up apologetically. “Sorry girls, I gotta run. Duty calls.”
“Yeah, whatever. Thanks for my nails,” Roxy says boredly, inspecting her new coats. Chica sighs dramatically, leaning on her trash bag.
“You’ll have to tell us everything another time,” she says seriously. You nod. Of course you would. She eyes Moon and her eyes glint cheekily. “Have you come to take them away?”
“Come to get them to work,” Moon responds curtly. “No overtime allowed.”
You walk outside, waving to the girls. “Thanks for the help, Chicken.”
“Have fun with your prince!” Chica calls, and you move out of the way of the sensor so the door slams shut on her. You turn to Moon.
“We can start-”
He cuts you off. “You look terrible.”
Wow. “Okay, rude.”
“You haven’t slept in days.” His eyes are pixelated, meaning he’s currently scanning your condition. You do your best to act like a person who gets a healthy amount of sleep, but it’s hard, because now that he’s mentioned it, your eyes are drooping. “Tell me that my sensors are wrong, and you have slept more than five hours in the past two days.”
“You’re wrong?” you try, but he’s gripping your shoulders and marching you over to the lobby doors, still suspended in the air. “Hey, I have a job to do.”
“I’ll handle it,” he says through metaphorically gritted teeth.
“Moon-”
“You are going to take a nap.”
Okay, well, you couldn’t exactly argue with that. Mainly because if you did, he’d probably tear your arms off. And a nap really did sound nice about now.
Moon guides you to the red daycare doors, then stands in front of you sternly, hunched over so that you can’t escape his gaze. “You are going to go inside. You are going to get the blankets and pillows from the cupboard. When I return, you will be asleep.”
“No overtime,” you remind him halfheartedly.
“I will clock you out. Go.” He points to the doors.
“You’re bossy,” you try, but now you’re really pushing it because you think if you say anything more he’s actually going to kill you. “Okay, okay. I’m going to bed.”
Your phone dangles in front of your face. That son of a bitch. You reach for it, but it’s tucked away into his chest cavity before you can blink. “You will get this back when you have slept.”
There’s no use arguing. You give a mocking salute. Moon opens the doors, and you walk through, not looking back until they clang shut behind you.
You yawn instantly. He was right - you needed some sleep.
#i promise the next one will be more moon oriented#(malicious intent)#fnaf sun#fnaf daycare attendant#fnaf moon#fnaf#fnaf fic#dcatober24#security breach#five nights at freddy's security breach#fnaf chica#fnaf roxy#fnaf vanessa#sunshine and nightlights#fnaf security breach#i love my girls so much#reader and the other animatronics will have cute relationships because i say so#its MY writing and I get to choose the side quests!!!
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Kinda funny ask, but what if your yandere’s darlings get up to midnight shenanigans. How would your yanderes react?
(I personally have no idea what you mean by midnight shenanigans so I am assuming you mean Darling is up eating snacks and watching TV and otherwise not sleeping)
Atalanta is a pretty heavy sleeper, but if she reached over in the middle of the night and you weren't there, she would wake up concerned, alarmed, and PISSED. Her first thought is that you've tried to run away, and she tears out of the room with thoughts of sending a manhunt after you. But then she hears a theme song coming from the screening room and she slinks in to find you eating chips at 3am while watching anime. She's not really angry anymore, just kinda confused as fuck. What ensues is a small conversation like what are you doing, watching TV, it's 3am, I know, ... Go to bed. Atalanta is strict about your health and this is not good for you, so she's ordering you back to bed. If you truly cannot sleep, she will give you some melatonin and probably a lecture about how simply lying down is also restful. So, Ata is not the kind of person to have midnight fun with.
Vivien is a pretty light sleeper, but let's say today that he had a hard day at work and he was really tired. When he rolls over to try and cuddle you (and smother you in his running-too-hot body), and he doesn't find you, he would instantly be awake and so upset, calling your name and trying to find you. He's got the blanket around his shoulders and his hair is so messy and he just looks like a little kid who's working up the courage to tell his mom he threw up. When he finds you watching tv on the couch, he's a little too tired to join you in this fun, but he'll be damned if you'll be lonely. Scoot over, he's coming in. He'll wrap his large body around you and get in the perfect cuddle position, then conk right tf out. It's kind of nice, he loves you so much. Oh and when he wakes up the next morning, he's so confused as to how the two of you ended up on the couch covered in Doritos when you went to bed normally.
Noelle is an insomniac with terrible sleeping habits (Partly Atalanta's fault), so she's probably not sleeping to begin with. If you want to sit around and watch TV and eat snacks in the early hours of the morning, she'll join you. She'll be working/hacking on her laptop or reading the whole time, but she'll be cuddled up right next to you. This is so bad for her though, she already has so little time to sleep. She'll match you night for night with seemingly no effects except a slight increase in the caffeine shakes, but she won't complain. If it becomes a regular thing and she's really really exhausted, you might be privy to seeing her curled into a tiny ball, quietly dozing on your shoulder. Never mention this though, she'll get very embarrassed about that.
#Atalanta my oc#Vivien my oc#Noelle my oc#yandere oc#yandere imagine#soft yandere#yandere blog#yandere headcanons#yandere#yandere x darling#yandere fluff#yandere darling#yandere girl#possesive yandere#yandere bf#yandere boy#yandere headcanon#yandere headcannons#yandere imagines#yandere lesbian#yandere male#yandere original character#yandere wlw#yandere thoughts#yandere x reader#yandere x willing reader#yandere x y/n#yandere x you
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this is for those who have asked about how the november project is going—if you’re not interested, that’s okay! just scroll on by!
NOVEMBER PROJECT UPDATE
the working title initials are WLI (also I realised it has the same number of syllables as LNT 😂)
today I hit 30k! I set myself both a realistic goal and a dream goal, and the realistic goal was 30k (50k is the dream goal)
it has both been so much fun, and also one of the hardest things I’ve done in a few years.
all of the chapters are currently named after the days of the week, using as a passage of time. I’m not sure if I’ll keep it like this, but it’s very helpful for continuity (she says, while admitting at one point she forgot three days of the week 😂)
a thing that’s surprised me with it’s is how much I miss texting fics (👀 so, im on the hunt for ideas I can write here fyi)
my main character’s name is emmy and she likes wearing corduroy
emmy’s love interest is a man who loves listening to keane
music (and what they listen to when they commute) is very important
writing chronologically is really hard but I’m determined to try for this particular thing
one thing I’ve learnt is: my characters love using surnames instead of first names — which I think is very me
I’m not entirely sure what else could be of interest, without me spoiling things but I’m hoping to keep chipping away and have a first draft done by christmas.
I miss writing fanfic so much! and I’m hoping now I’ve set them up really well, I can be a bit easier with myself so I can get back to a bit of balance.
anyway, thank you for all the love, support and best wishes! and I hope this is a nice little update 🥹😘
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Eye to Eye
Pt 1
The encounter
1714 words
Alright chat let’s do this,
I had one semi completed one but then I needed cute dividers so it deleted itself
Also creds to @sister-lucifer for the dividers.
I know I know I know, it’s pretty crazy right? Another bill cipher’s daughter fic, not surprising. However it’s bill ford and it’s silly.
This godforsaken fanfiction was helped by my friend and for legal reasons alibi @dandelion-tea7 so yeah. With all the love I can muster thank you.
Also, side note yes this is a test run for my last post :3
Anyways let’s get to the bit
Stanford was never one to want children.
In fact the very idea perturbed him to an acceeded extent. Children of his running around his lab and ruining the space with glitter and or snot, it was revolting to say the least. His great niece and nephew were enough children. Particularly with what’s been going on for the past 30 years, Him getting trapped in the portal and leaving his child to be raised by…
Stanley.
That was the worst punishment of all in his opinion.
However, children are good for a few things: Memories, smiles, and laughter, sure the occasional adorableness but his children would probably be too focused on school work to be “cute.” He’d be sure of it. He didn’t want kids though, never has never will.
Yet here he was, discussing it with 14 year old Mabel Pines.
“Awe! Why not?! Kids are adorable, sweet, and adorable!” Mabel’s high pitched voice squealed at him, causing Ford’s ears to hum uncomfortably.
Stanford rolled his eyes at her young charm. He always thought she burned brighter as a star. “Mabel, i work too much to give children the time of day, for god's sakes I barely see you two!” He cut up some carrots to put in a soup he’s working on. He’s very proud of himself.
Dipped groaned softly covering his ears. Poor puberty was eating that boy away faster than termites in a food littered apartment. “Mabel, can you stop talking about Grunkle ford having kids? Besides, he's too old!”
“Precisely, Dipper, my boy!”
Mabel pouted, pulling her knees up to her chest while looking over at Dipper. “So? What if college was an exciting ti-“
Dipper let out a high pitched wail. Silencing Mabel almost immediately. Stanford laughed heartily, a part of him enjoying the banter despite how improbable the conversation was. College? Exciting? Hardly. Learning about the the brain's response to psychological torture was quite invigorating, however.
A familiar voice piped up. “Oh no, are we talking about Sixer’s love life again?” Stanley walked in holding a blender. He seemed oddly cheerful today, his eyes sparkling with the same mischief he had as a child.
Ford turned to him curiously. His eyes glancing at the blender, old torn up pieces of plastic in the bowl connected, Stanford looked back up at Ford. “Why?”
“Why not?”
“But why?”
“Why not?”
“Stanley.” Stanford groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose while Stanley softly chortled. Mabel gasped, jogging over to interrogate him.*
Mabel grabbed onto the side of the counter pulling herself higher to look at the old blender. “Is that going to be the blender squirrel?!” Mabel shrieked, reaching for it, Stanley pulled away.
Dipper raised a questioning brow. “Blender…squirrel?”
Stanley rolled his eyes in offense, was Dipper, Little Dipper really judging him? “Alright, yeah, Squirrel blender, it was Mabel’s idea. I mean I don’t know it’ll be fun to see someone try to understand how it works.” Stanley looked at it, fixing all the gross chipped pieces.
Dipped sighed, he’d never understand his Sister and His Grunkle’s brains when they’re choosing such weird ways to bond. He didn’t mind it though. “Sure, a squirrel blender will be great!” He dripped with sarcasm.
Stanford fixed his glasses before turning to Stanley. “Stanley, come try this.” He lifted a spoon of carrot soup to his mouth. Stanley would always speak his mind, so he continued to count on it.
The moment Stanley smelled it he dropped it to the ground. Ford’s face falls flat. Stanley sputters for a few moments before coughing and grimacing. “You trying to poison me Sixer?!”
“It’s just carrot soup-“
“It’s rabbit shi-“
“Woah!” Dipper suddenly jumped out of his chair as he saw something outside. “I saw something!” Dipper got out of his chair while Mabel gasped “what?! I wanna see!” She quickly followed. Stanley sighed as the kids ran out. Turning to Ford. “Not it.”
Ford raised an eyebrow. “Are you a child.” Ford said with a soft affectionate laugh. Stanley pouts a finger on his nose.
“Nose goes.”
“I hate you.
-~-~-~-~-~
The forest air was warm and cozy like a blanket on the warm bed with its holder squished between. Ford sighed happily at the familiarity of it all. For the first time since he actually came home, he felt at home.
Dipper wrote in his own journal, walking only but a few feet ahead. Mabel very happily skipped along. So far ahead seemed like pleasant searching for the creature that caught Dipper’s eye.
Dipper seemed a bit stiff so Ford placed a soothing hand on his shoulder. “Are you alright?” He’d ask voice full of care and warmth.
Dipper glanced up at his grunkle Ford. With a hint of familiar admiration to the older male. “Hm? Oh…uh…yeah.” he coughed softly. He wrote things quickly in his journal. As if trying to fill it with every last thing he thought.
Ford raised an eyebrow at this and sighed “Dipper you may be a fast thinker, but it helps if the ideas were clearer and more concise. Try slowing down and enjoying the moment?” Ford said with a soft smile on his face.
Despite the urge to keep writing, Dipper reluctantly put the journal down. “Youre right Grunkle Ford…” Dipper muttered earning an elbow in the side from his twin. He looked at her and elbowed back. Soon they were play fighting all over again.
The humor in their sibling rivalry caused Ford to let out a laugh. “Alright- alright that's-” A twig snaps behind them.
Ford spins around gun already ready to be pulled. Dipper and Mabel stare for a moment in the same direction. Ford looks down to see if there's any sign of life. There's a torn piece of fabric on a tree. The old man approaches it.
“Strange.” He mutters. Grabbing the fabric and rubbing it between his fingers. A leaf falls in front of him, followed by soft tree rustling. He waves the kids back further, looking up.
“…hello? Who's there? I know you're up there!” he shouts in a stern voice. Causing even Dipper to flinch. Mabel looks up gasping softly.
She runs to the tree earning a yelp from her brother. “Mabel wait-” he reaches for her arm but falls flat on his face instead. Ford looks down at Mabel, a minor glare for having disobeyed him. “Its a girl!” Mabel points. “Its a teenage girl!”
Ford raised an eyebrow. “How do you-”
“Just look!” Mabel grabbed a stick, climbing on top of Ford’s shoulders really quickly (his back would regret that later.) she poked whoever was in the tree.
There's a soft “ow” from in the tree.
Ford’s eyes widen taking the stick from Mabel. “Come out.” he said a little softer as to not startle her. The girl, fed up, grabbed the stick and threw it away. “Come on, you have to come down at some point.”
Stanford had to surpress an eyeroll at the quiet “Nuh uh.” from the tree.
“Yuh huh, now get down!” there was a tearing sound from the tree. “Or gravity will force you.” The girl struggled to hold herself up.
“Well I guess that's why everyone calls this place gravity fa-” The twig gives way under her, sending her crashing to the ground, it would be devastating if only shed actually hit the ground.
Mabel watched in awe as the girl hovered in the air. “WOAH!” She exclaimed before Dipper pulled her away. Ford furrowed his large brows stepping closer. “Fascinating…”
The mystery girl opened her eyes looking up at Ford. His eyes widened the moment he saw it. Not two, but three eyes on her face, one of the in the dead center of her forehead that glistened an uncomfortably familiar yellow.
Ford glared slightly. “Who are you.” The girl flinched, finally succumbing to gravity’s tricks and crashing down into the mud. She groaned in pain putting up her hands.
She closed her third eye. “Hey listen, I didn't mean any harm…i just-” She frowned looking away, as if thinking. “Which twin are you?” She asked the man standing over her.
“Which twin?” Ford tilted his head to the side, glaring even harder. “Whats your name first.”
The girl seemed to curse softly. “…uh…(Y/N)…”
“Where are your parents.” He steps closer slowly. His imposing figure getting more and more intimidating as he grew near.
(Y/N) frowned standing up and dusting herself off while backing up. “Well that's actually funny you say that! Because they are-” she was cut off by a tree hitting her back.
“Answer me.” Ford said with a soft huff. He's fed up with lies. He's worried this girl is somehow related to demon they killed two years ago. That yellow eye all two familiar.
They were up close when the girl finally decided to speak, “Stanford right? Well uh-” She flinched when he raised an eyebrow, she knew she probably shouldn't have said his name when she seems to be a stranger.
Theirs a silence that passes, followed by a gulp from the girl. “…if you're Stanford pines…then…Oh jeez this is weird-” She squeezes her hands together. “…im Bill cipher’s kid-”
There it is, he's never whipped out his gun so fast. The girl shrieked “WAIT WAIT WAIT!”
“WHY SHOULD I WAIT WHEN YOURD THE VERY THING IVE WORKED YEARS TO DESTROY!” Ford yelled back looking back at the kids. “Kids close your eyes this is gonna get messy.”
“NO WAIT IM HALF HUMAN!” (Y/N) screamed bloody murder putting her hands up. Ford lowered the gun while the kids tilted her head.
Dipper stepped closer “half human? Like Bill-” Mabel stepped up to interrupt him. “How is that possible? Does he even have-” Ford put his hand up to silence them.
“What do you mean? You're half human? Who's your other parent?” He asks pushing the gun into her neck. She gagged softly grabbing the barrel. Tears pricked her eyes.
“You?”
Ford’s world shattered in that moment, silence broke out and a million questions flew through his head. He'd never danced Bill’s devil’s tango. Nor has the thought passes. So how could this happen? What in the world was going on?
He didn't know, but he was determined to find out.
(Not edited or revised)
#fanfiction#gravity falls#grunkle stunkle wins the funkle bunkle#bill ford#grunkle ford#stanford pines#yes it’s another bill cipher daughter fic screw off.#bill mpreg? I guess?
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