betelgooze

[betelgooze]

Never once in my sixteen years of life have I ever felt so betrayed by the human race which I am now ashamed to be a member of

On the first day god said let there be light but after witnessing the horror that is Emilia Perez I wish he did not and that’s assuming gods real in the first place and as a catholic I’m begining to question it because no god would allow a movie such as this one to make its way out of someone’s mouth let alone form in one’s mind. Thirteen Oscar nominations??? Are you shitting me??? However, it is ironically the amount of reasons I have and the amount of b#llets loaded in my g#n. I swear to Joshua Christ himself I will do it this time.

To be clear I’m not homophobic or transphobic(I’m lit enby and aro)but when my they/them ass finished the horror movie that is Emilia Perez I became the most “uncle on thanksgiving” person known to man because WHAT is this. And if I see anyone referring to Emilia as a man please tell me where you live. I just want to talk. Ignore the g#n behind my back that’s not important. This movie makes trans people out to be the villain and SURE some of us are horrible but never in my life have I left my wife and children to become a woman. Mostly bc I was born one. And physically can never have kids. And also I don’t have a wife. “I think therefore I am” no you think therefore I’m DAMNED I CANNOT MAKE IT THROUGH ANOTHER DAY KNOWING EMILIA PEREZ EXISTS IN THE SAME UNIVERSE AS I. Also her actor is racist so um. Yeah there’s that.

Anyways real review: I’m not that mad abt this movie, it sucks and it shouldn’t be praised, but I genuinely could not muster even a single shit abt this movie in a serious setting.

Like what you like. I don’t care. If you like this movie good for you! I genuinely couldn’t care less. Opinions are subjective. Opinions are. Opinions.

So I’ll respect you if you like the movie, I simply do not like it.

Also I put tw tags just in case bc this satirical post got violent lol

[betelgooze]

I cannot watch movies like a normal person

[betelgooze]

Okay so slight nsfw warning bc Terrifier but one of the things I’ll repeat at LEAST twice a day in really any context that I can fit it into is “v@gina facing the world” or “I jumped into this situation v@gina first” and let’s just say Terrifier took “v@gina first” in a whole different context iykwim

[betelgooze]

Sorry babe, the cowboy hat stays on during sex. And so does the Mandalorion armor it is a sacred tradition and

[betelgooze]

Oh no it’s him

[betelgooze]

Him

[betelgooze]

cars

[betelgooze]

Me when I wake up and realize this is my most liked post

but Will Wood fans still act absolutely flabbergasted when you tell them your favorite song is “love me, normally” and not “No matter how many times I scream my pillow will never answer/Mr. Vampires secret skeleton boyfriend/Mr. Vampires husband Zombie man/Mr. Vampire and Zombie man get a divorce because of Mr. Vampires secret skeleton boyfriend/Jesus may be a being of light but I’m a being of the blue haired moths(God vs the devil rap battle ft. Bruno mars)” which is a twelve minute long audio clip recorded on a 1971 PhoneMate model 400 answering machine

Real comedian we have here(if one more person tells me to charge my damn phone I’m throwing it off a bridge)

[betelgooze]

He needs to be stopped. It simply isn’t okay.

[betelgooze]

☆god bless America it’s the fern hoard☆

[betelgooze]

About to draw all of Fernclouds kits. Send help.

[betelgooze]

☆Warrior cat designs☆

Masterlist woohoo yippee hooray let’s gooo

Cinder & Lion kits

Squilfs kits <- includes the three

Feathertail & Stormfur

Mapleshade & her very alive children

Fernclouds personal clan of kits

Moth Flight & Micah

Brokenbutt & his better siblings

Crookedstar

[betelgooze]

☆ heart bluer than my balls ☆

Touch grass before you read this. I know it’s been a while.

Welcome to my blog :) my names Betelgooze (not really) but you can call me Gooze

I’m an aspiring criminologist and working on a scholarship so expect literally NO personally stuff to ever be posted. We cannot have anyone find out about the sillies. Tis’ forbidden.

I may join the Navy as an aviator, but that depends on the state of the world and if I feel like it’s time to fight for my family and friends. Joining the Navy SPECIFICALLY is to honor my dead grandfather, a navy vet who died long before I was born.

I use they/them pronouns but atp I don’t really care lol

Quick fun fact bc why not: my whole family supports me but I ask them to call me my deadname and I’m fine with them calling me that. It’s weird when they call me my chosen name, idk why, and I’ll respond to it. I prefer when everyone else calls me my chosen name though. I also asked my mom to name me so ig it’s not rlly my CHOSEN name but I did agree with it so it kinda is lol

NOW!!! While I am not a therian or identify with Neo pronouns, I will defend them till the day I die so dni if your an asshole abt those things

DNI:

-Deff gonna be killed to death for this but please do not hate on ALL cops. Cops can suck, yes, but do not direct your hate towards all cops. Some have died to save people and their reputation has been tainted due to the assholes who abuse their power.

-Inc*st in any form

-I don’t feel like discussing LGBT or political discourse so don’t bring it up idgaf lmao

-Anti-furries. I’m not a furry(despite drawing them all the time lol)but you don’t have to be an ass. Furrys are awesome and we live laugh love

I may have recovered from my villain arc (middle school) over five years ago however with every passing holiday my mom buys me warrior cat merch and it is slowly returning, thankfully only the warrior cat obsession and nothing else

I’ve got very dry humor btw, I type seriously, sometimes in Victorian ass English, simply cause it’s funny. Also, using phrases that are not funny are funny to me because the fact it’s not funny IS funny does this make sense? No. No it does not.

Also I only use punctuation if it makes the sentence funnier for I have lost my mind

Not me ranting about nothing but anyways MORE ABOUT ME💔💔💔

I’ve been writing a web series and working on a book, expect updates gasp gasp

Few things I like:

Star Wars is UNHEALTHY FOR ME I AM OBSESSED @poultrygeist69 CAN CONFIRM THEY HATEEE STAR WARS AND I LOVE IT SM IT HAS DRIVEN A WRENCH IN OUR FRIENDSHIP /J BUT ALSO HELP anyways. obsessed w Star Wars ama I’ll know the answer lol

I love splatterpunk & extreme horror except I’m like. Yk normal??? I’m not a freak dw lol

I love warrior cats but as I’ve grown I’ve become more of a horror guy

My favorite shows/movies are very white man core according to my friends despite being nether of those things:

-OZ(hbo)

-The walking dead

-Preacher

-Breaking bad

-Top gun(s)

-Nimona

-Arcane

-BoJack Horseman(BPD fan🫱🏼‍🫲🏻BPD main character)

I also like:

-Mouthwashing

-Warrior cats

-Detroit: become human

-bad movies lol

-FNAF

I’m physically disabled but pretend not to be bc it’s so funny to do a whole workout and than reveal “by the way my right hand doesn’t work lol”

I’m not too open about my mental health but I’m always open to talk and I support everyone

Thank for reading :)

[betelgooze]

on the kitchen floor. straight up “pounding it”. and by “it”, haha, well. lets justr say. My head

[betelgooze]

The CinderLion hoard

[betelgooze]

💔disaster siblings💔

[betelgooze]

Redid Hollyleaf bc I didn’t like how I drew her💅🏼

The disaster siblings sure do hope nothing bad happens to them

SPARKPELT WILL ALWAYS BE GOLDEN IN MY DELULU HEAD SHUT