the-unrestrained-poet

[the-unrestrained-poet]

The not so party worthy manic episode Not the windows It can’t be the windows… Not the dark It can't be the dark… Don’t look! You can’t look! What if you're seen!? Teagan, honey  Nobody is there. But they could be? Stay in your room. Not in the dark? Not in the dark.

-Teagan R. Nault

[the-unrestrained-poet]

I need ideas!!

I have been wracking my brain desperately trying to figure out more impactful ways that I can help people both who are like me and not like me. I don’t drive and I don’t get to leave my house a lot because of the fact that town isn’t within walking distance of my house. I don’t have an income because I don’t work due to chronic illness. I’ve been researching different movements and ways that I can display that I want to be a part of the solution. I’m trying to use social media. I know full and well that none of it is going to be easy but I really want to do what I can. I don’t want to be someone who doesn't bother to educate themselves. I have always held feminist values and I believe that feminism should include fighting for everyone. I'm a demi-female pansexual so I'm not an outsider to the issues specifically regarding LGBTQIA+ matters. Please leave ideas for me in the comments. I would be so grateful.

[the-unrestrained-poet]

I hold myself. Not in comfort, But in covering- The need- The need to hide. It plagues me… A Revocation of safety. Say goodbye  To the loved ones With secrets- The ones They never told- How they wanted to Become themselves. Now they will die- Out of fear  for their lives. The life they need-  Of who they are.

-Teagan R. Nault

[the-unrestrained-poet]

TW: mention of SEXUAL ASSAULT and SUICIDE

For the past 12 years the best word I could find to express how I viewed myself, is whore. I hope that makes you sick. When I was 6 years old my mother’s boyfriend at the time raped me. I don’t want to hear you say you're sorry, that's something you say when someone’s cat dies. That is never something you say when someone had been raped. I was in first grade. When second grade came around I hated myself so much that I had to be hospitalized in a children's psych ward because I became a danger to myself. This cycle would continue for over a decade. During this cycle I attempted to kill myself by taking two bottles of blood pressure pills. It was too late to make me throw them up. All that could be done is to watch me sit in the emergency room as doctors tried to find other ways to keep me alive. I was 15 years old. Statistics show… 1 in 5 women will be raped in their lifetime, 1 in 3 girls between the ages of 11 and 17 is when a women will be a victim of rape for the first time. I would also like to say that 81% of women are raped in their lifetime and 43% of men are raped in their lifetime. It happens to men too. No amount of representation of this in television will ever come close to showing how badly this sickness is present in people's lives. To the person who I’m talking about… know that you will never be forgiven by me. You will never be forgiven by any divine being I assure you that. There is no god or savior for you.

[the-unrestrained-poet]

I bought this on TeePublic.com last night and I can't wait to get it in the mail.

[the-unrestrained-poet]

TW: Mention of abuse

I wonder? Could he possibly- Maybe he could? No. The simple word- No he couldn't- Not possibly. Not ever. He would always  Be a self proclaimed King. But- With no women to abuse, and no little girl; to be made Smaller… Hell bent- on changing the memory… Held by her body.

-Teagan R. Nault

[the-unrestrained-poet]

Why is a gun- Always treated as loaded. Because you never- You never know. Now- If you can… Look at a man, And what he Is able to do. He can fire a gun. But he doesn't  Need it- Not to commit  The ultimate  Death. The one that  Should only be given- Never taken.

-Teagan R. Nault

[the-unrestrained-poet]

They don't see- They shouldn't need To see. When I fall  To my knees- When I can't  Breath- When the pain Strikes me,  But the pills  Give no relief. When I grief Something, I never saw.

-Teagan R. Nault

[the-unrestrained-poet]

It's not politics!! It's human!!

The link below is a Gofundme for a family in Gaza who are trying to keep their children alive. This isn't a matter of politics it's a matter of having humanity. It's a matter of doing what you can. It's a matter that can save or seize a life. This time in existence is the one we were given and we should up hold the direction of morality.

https://gofund.me/fd1faea2 🔗

[the-unrestrained-poet]

The green that  Kills the hopes Of a child once bright- Eyes now desolate. Innocence taken as a child  In the middle of the night- It will stop, but it won’t fade. The liquor lacks the brains, But not the buzz. The wine is drained  From the wrists of the sorrowful.  I will be gone Before the barrel of my heart Runs dry.

-Teagan R. Nault

[the-unrestrained-poet]

I told you- But you dismissed me! I told you how I felt as through My head fell to my knees- That the floor would Sink beneath me- How my body seemed to strike me. “Oh, you're fine.” The words echoed  In my mind- They poisoned me- I believed them. I know now- And I will never authorize that again.

-Teagan R. Nault

[the-unrestrained-poet]

[the-unrestrained-poet]

TW: MENTION OF SUICIDE

What will become of me? When I’m gray- When I’m old- Decades from now When I meet queen Hel. When I will rest- Instead of being depressed. Sometimes I think back  on the night that it all almost ended. I think of the empty pill bottles- And their stupidity  I think about  how there was nothing  Left for me. How even if I lived I would not survive- I would be nothing more  Than a corpse- With reanimated features And a heartbeat.

[the-unrestrained-poet]

I feel like more people need to hear this.

[the-unrestrained-poet]

My Graveyard Is filled  The victims Of my medusa stare. It mirrors a penny for your thoughts- But it's a gift  For your sorrows. Now that my looks can kill I have a graveyard full of dead.

[the-unrestrained-poet]

TW: INFERED SELF-HARM

Screaming no sound I want to scream, In agony? In disgust?  - it hurts, but I can hide it. It’s a drug -  Red and hot, Sharp and swift.  I scream. I want someone to hear me. Though I am silenced by one thing… Fear. 

-Teagan R. Nault

[the-unrestrained-poet]

With the year of the snake coming up I thought it would be fun to do a spooky snake drawing. This here ghost snake and his little intrusive thought demons seem to enjoy eating all the Halloween candy 💀