#youngmum

[shediary4]

Well, where to start? Life seems to be filled with so many choices, all taking us in one direction or another. Is everything mapped out for us? Or do we dictate our future by choices made daily? I have no idea, but I guess we'll wait and see.

So a bit about me... i'm a mother (to both children and dogs!), disney obsessed, book worm and was almost certainly born in the wrong era. Documentary enjoyer, unfortunate muggle, dollhouse enthusiast and believer in love.

Since having my first child in my late teens, I feel like I've been having some kind of identity crisis, which affects me in every day life. I adore my children dont get me wrong, but feel like I am so much more than just a mother. I am my own person, with my own personality and I point blank refuse to grow old never having enjoyed those experiences most go through in early adulthood.

I will get to experience all those things; being absolutely mortal having a great night with friends, travelling, making spontaneous decisions and most importantly, having a shower without "Mummy ___ is crying!". For me itll just be a bit later in life.

As I'm sure everyone does, I've certainly got a lot going on. I'm hoping writing my thoughts and questions may make things ever so slightly easier!

Shediary4 x

[crystalsandmermaids]

Might start posting on tumblr again just somewhere to get the crap out my head.

I’m fat, I’ve decided to stop taking my medication (Again) I’m numb & I’m confused.

But I’m a mother so.. life must go on.

[thisyoungmumslife-blog]

Little park trip with little man this morning before nursery #mumblogger #mumlife #mumlifeblog #everyday #everydayblog #everydayblogger #youngmum #youngmumblog #youngmumblogger #ukmumblog #ukmumblogger #ukmumbloggers #ukmumblogs #mylife #dailylife #blog #blogger #memories https://www.instagram.com/p/B2n5VronSAJ/?igshid=av3vmsbl5e0y

[aimeebellmua]

H A P P Y S E P T E M B E R 🙌❤ . Today is the last day we have with daddy before he goes back to work tomorrow, I think I got this! I had Erin from 12 o'clock lunchtime yesterday right through till now so I feel like it's been a good rehearsal for tonight. I can do this ❤ I've managed to turn her weird sleeping and feeding pattern back round to 3-4 hours and getting sleepy after a feed. We have also been successful at getting her to sleep in her cotbed attachment from her pushchair 🙌. As it can be moved around I can get her to sleep in this and carry her upstairs or attach to the pram and take her with me downstairs. Gunna be a God send 🙌❤ Well done Erin baby, you are doing so well I am super proud of you ❤ . #4weeksold #babygirl #firstleap #baby #newborn #love #family #babyroutines #247shift #nighttimeshift #muminfluencer #mumblogger #blogger #instainfluencer #mumlife #wigwearer #glasses #youngmum #leedsmum #mumsfromleeds https://www.instagram.com/p/B127EmHFBjI/?igshid=1rquzjvbh5spq

[arganianails]

A Argània Nails & Sthètic us cuidem, us mimem, i us posem més guapes! #arganianails #nails #instanail #supermames #youngmum #atrapasomnis #reconstruccio #unglesmanlleu #uñasmanlleu #osona #unglesosona #uñasosona (at Argània Nails & Estètic) https://www.instagram.com/p/ByGaJBRIhz8/?igshid=ai8vhuskjruh

[xantheduffy-blog]

WHY IS SELF-CARE IS SO IMPORTANT: THE SIDE PARENTS NEGLECT

Self-care has to be one of the most neglected terms used when becoming a parent. You spend all your time running around making meals, doing the washing, changing nappies, that you have zilch amount of time to put into your own personal wellbeing. Or sometimes, its just easier to use that excuse, the “Oh, I never have enough time in the day to do nice things for myself.”. But maybe we just don’t know where to start, or we just put it aside as something that doesn’t matter. When becoming a mum, everyone else’s responsibilities and wellbeing become before your own, so rather than putting ourselves first occasionally, it’s easier to just put our own self-care aside, even if it would only take 10 minutes out of your day. As if you don’t matter. But you DO MATTER. And looking after your mind and body can make all the difference to your day, yourself and to your relationship with your child.

YOU ARE NOT SELFISH

Self-Care IS NOT selfish, it’s necessary. After all this time spent caring for someone else, it feels selfish to even think about taking 10 minutes out of the day for yourself. Crazy, right? Like, we have actually adapted to the state of mind that we just simply don’t matter, and everything else comes before our own health and wellbeing. Every night you go to bed thinking about what you will do better tomorrow to make your kids or partners lives easier and better. But do you ever think about what you are going to do for yourself?

“Taking care of yourself doesn't mean me first, it means me too.”

YOU ARE IMPORTANT

Read that again.

IT IS OKAY. It is okay to simply just sit and breathe for a small 10 minutes. You are worth the small amount of time that it takes to focus on yourself. It is important for you to nurture your own wellbeing and look out for your own happiness for once.

You are important.

“When you recover or discover something that nourishes your soul and brings joy, care enough about yourself to make room for it in your life.”

BUT WHY IS SELF-CARE SO IMPORTANT?

It gives you a break from stress

The constant flow of chores that get thrown at you every day can load a filthy weight on your shoulders. Simply by taking a break, you are opening yourself up to letting go of all that���s holding you down. Finding a sense of relaxation, and looking after yourself will allow you to re-enter your day feel refreshed and will actually elevate your happiness.

It gives you time alone

Time alone can feel completely out of reach when you are a parent. You aren’t even aloud to go empty your bowels without your toddler asking you a million questions or pulling on your arm for a drink or to find their stuffed animal. So when can you find that short stretch of time for yourself? As soon as they’ve hit the hay, ACT ON IT. Go have a warm bath, light a candle, add some bubbles, rest your head back, and breathe. But what if they wake up? If this a worry that stops you, do something more quick and simple! Sit on the floor, couch or even your bed, cross your legs, straighten your back, and simply take deep breaths in and out for 10 minutes. Don’t think about your phone, don’t think about the kids, don’t think about what you are going to make your kids for breakfast in the morning, and don’t think about all the washing that hasn’t been done for 3 days. Enjoy this time ALONE with yourself.

With Love,

If you need more help with starting your self-care routine, I have made a FREE 4 WEEK SELF-CARE CHALLENGE! You’ll be able to set yourself goals each week and really focus on yourself. You do matter, and you are important, so no more excuses! If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me.

[mummy-baby-blog]

The beginings.

I'll never forget the day I found I was pregnant it was not long after my nineteenth birthday and I wasn't sure how I should feel about the whole situation. Me and my partner at the time haven't planned children and not to lie to myself I was definitely not ready 100% to start a life as a family. I've always planned to be a mummy, one day, when the time is right but things happen and that's where we stood. I've question myself and if I'm ready for it and even so some people might of not agreed with certain options I still considered if I'm doing the right thing. When I've decided I wanted to keep my pregnancy and just let it all be. I've always been good with babies, toddlers and children in general but never thought of how would I be with my own. It's easy looking after someone's child as they have everything ready for you to use.. First feeling were overwhelming, 100 questions going through my mind at the same time... what would I need, how I should do this, how do I know if I'm prepared enough and tbf asking people around and googling did help but didn't change the fact of how would I be able to manage. It's hard to face the fact of letting your freedom go and change your life around suddenly. Give up all your bad habits and start preparing yourself for the next stage of life. As my pregnancy went along and all the scans came and all the midwife appointments, I couldn't help but start loving my growing bump. It's an amazing feeling of being able to see your baby develop with the technology we have nowadays and how things progress. But the best feelings that made me love that unborn baby was the first little moves and kicks, and even so the pregnancy is not so pretty like we all think, well at least I thought it was easy.. But the sleepless night, constant need of toilet, sickness when you try and eat the things you liked, random cravings and backaches. So many things you could go on about but in my eyes it was all worth it at the end. Being all prepared for my baby to come and getting closer to the due date I have actually got keys to the new place I was moving into. That time I was 2 days before my due date, The baby could of came any minute really. Even so I've been moving around a lot while painting and everything else was being done and me trying to sort out my place ready for the baby the night before we finished painting at that time I was 5 days overdue and I've been looking like I'm ready to "pop" for a long time and then I did! 6 days overdue and the baby boy has made his appearance. The emotions was unbelievable. I always had so much love in my heart but I never thought you could possibly love and care for someone so deeply. 13th November 2018, little Toby has melted my heart away. Being a mummy especially at this age can be really hard, but I guess being a mum in general is hard, but it's all worth it at the end. Not long after I have turned 20, my baby is 4,5 months now and there's been so much going on. From birth to now that is unreal.

I'll get into those stories in a different post. Starting from birth to everything I've been through and my own experience. But I would love any mummies young or not to not be shy and message me or tag me in their experiences!

[somethingsaru]

38 weeks done...Well that concludes my maternity leave

Today had been quite an emotional day and one filled with anxiety,sadness and truly appreciative feelings. As I looked into my 9 month old little girl’s eyes as we did our grocery shopping, all I felt was a dam of emotion being broken inside of me.

It had finally hit me that this was the last full day, I had with my little bundle of joy without having to think about working or sorting the other priorities in my life. The last 38 weeks... I was solely focused on looking after and raising my daughter into the the cute little cherry blossom that she is. (Fun fact: my daughter was born at 38 weeks)

I know starting from tommorow she will be well looked after by the trusted individuals that will help look after my daughter during the day but I just can’t stand the thought that I will be away for 8 hours a day. In addition to this, I can’t help but feel paranoid and anxious about whether she can cope without me.

Maybe it’s me that can’t cope without her.

Mornings where I would watch her wake up and babble and pull my hair so she can get close to my face for dribbling kisses will be only reserved for weekends. Knowing that’s I’ll be spending 2-3 hours only in the weekdays with her kills me on the inside as by the time I’m finished with work and rushing back to her it will already be time for her to have dinner, washed and tucked into bed.

What I will say to all the mummas our there still on maternity leave with their little dribble monsters, is that they should cherish every single day they have with their little cuties because each of those days are one of the most sweetest memories in a mother’s heart that will help get through those struggling Monday mornings once your back to work. As well as that you can’t get back these days with your little ones as they are growing fast too and will be little busy bodies too.

Til next time...

Saru x

[itsunapologeticallyme]

Unapologetically Myself

I’m nineteen and pregnant,

And all I can think about

Is how my mother will react.

I know she’s going to shout.

I know sorry wont fix anything,

But maybe this baby will be a good thing.

I will love my son endlessly.

Who cares if I don’t have a wedding ring?

I see the looks of disgust I’m given

When I walk into the store.

I will simply smile and wave,

Although their behaviour shook me to the core.

What has the world come to?

Why can’t people just be kind?

These are the people that motivate me

To teach my son how to have an open mind.

I’m shamed by society

Because of my young age.

Thankfully, with (some) family and friends by my side,

My fears are quickly assuaged.

I know I will make mistakes along the way.

Hell, some may think I have already.

All I have to say to you

Is that your comments are really unnecessary.

Why don’t you send positivity instead?

I could’ve really used it.

All I needed was a friendly smile

When I thought I was going to lose it.

“Wait- how old are you?”

Is the never-ending question.

I always look away as I answer.

I don’t want to see your facial expression.

I’m twenty now.

I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy.

Never has my heart felt so divided

With a mixture of anxiety and joy.

I still get looks when I go out with my baby.

I cringe when they ask if he’s my brother.

I’m quite offended and utterly embarrassed

As I quietly whisper “No. I’m his mother.”

Please don’t judge me as a mum,

I’m just as qualified as you.

Yes, I’m young and had “so much ahead of me,”

But my dreams I still pursue.

My son has not “ruined my life.”

He’s actually opened my eyes.

For now I see roses where there were once weeds

And my happiness has reached an all time high.

Society has taught me to be ashamed.

Why? I am rich in happiness and health.

I’ve let my insecurities go now,

For I am unapologetically myself.

-k.v.h

[obsesivcreativ]

'B2B', a young mum's group I'm currently working with in Sunderland to create a second banner, as part of a diptych, for the @alanmeasles #vanityofsmalldifferences #graysonperry exhibition at @sunderlandmuseum. I worked with this lovely organisation 9 years ago to create a banner, when the Grayson Perry tapestries first went on display at Sunderland Museum and the young mums have since asked to make an accompanying piece. This new piece is very much of it's time and the young mum's have decided that to illustrate their lives and their 'tribes' a @tiktok page would work best for the design. ... #youngmums #youngmum #youngmumssupportnetwork #youngmumstufff #art #banner #bannermaking #tapestry #tapestries #textiles #textileart #craft #craftivism #sunderland #painting #diptych https://www.instagram.com/p/CeOJe1lohy2/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[strongwithoutrealising]

Probably the hardest section of parenting. Allowing your little people to become whoever they choose to be. We can guide and inspire yet ultimately they get to choose their own path. And we get to be there for them if they need us 💫❤️ #parentingquotes #parentingquotesoftheday #quotestoremember #teenparent #youngmum #stillmybabies #nomatterwhat https://www.instagram.com/p/CeCTBlrPpr9/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[emjoyemjoy]

Forever young together, a young mums story.

Part 1. I Fell pregnant with my little boy when I was 15 years old, in year 11 at Lowanna College. I remember the day so clearly when I found out I was pregnant. I had been sent to the paediatrician, my quantum worker Joan had picked me up and taken me to go back on adhd medication because I found it hard to concentrate and didn’t listen in school 😅 it was my best friends birthday 25th Feb 2009, I remember laying down on the bed in the doctors room and having a body examine as they did every time I had gone, I still don’t know why they had to do a body examine but that’s when the dr asked if I was sexually active and I laughed like pfft na man (it was one time I’m not active I was thinking in my head) he was pushing on my stomach looking me in the eyes so intensely, I can still see his eyes looking at me and now know they are eyes of concern, eyes of disbelief of this girl not knowing, I didn’t know I was pregnant, I had no clue, I was always a bigger girl, I didn’t get fatter, I remember doing a pregnancy test with a friend Bianca in the school toilets and it came up negative, i remember doing it because I knew I had sex but didn’t know if he had cummed in me or not, I had gotten periods and never seen a change in my body, I hadn’t got sick.. I guess I was blessed with a sick pregnancy because I had no bloody clue, and mind you I didn’t even know what a blow job was when I fell pregnant hahaha. The paediatrician finished pushing on my belly and stepped out of the room for abit and my worker Joan leant down and asked me if I’m sure I’m not pregnant and I remember my whole body getting hot and embarrassed like no way, then the pediatrition came back in with another lady who was a maternal health nurse, she had a blonde bob big glasses with a big overbite. I don’t remember her name but I remember seeing a weird little machine in her hand and some other things. She asked me if it was okay to press on my tummy and I said yes not knowing what’s going on freaking out full of anxiety like why are they all touching me what is wrong I’m not pregnant I had sex once. Then she said those words, you’re pregnant.. I find it hard to explain the explosion of emotions I felt within my body at that second, I instantly felt fucking terrified and that feeling didn’t go away for along time. The lady then grabbed that weird little machine she walked in with and put this weird gel on it and pressed it on my stomach, then this loud thud thud thud thud thud thud thud thud thud my baby’s heart beat, so loud and so fast, I just started balling my eyes out and freaking out, Joan with her beautiful words helped to calm me down and telling me everything’s going to be okay, they all were comforting me whilst the lady began to say to me how far she thinks I am and around when she thinks I’ll be due and she said around the 27th of May. 3 months. 3 months away from having a baby. That was one of the most terrifying overwhelming days of my life.

[thisyoungmumslife-blog]

Ollivers dietitian appointment

today was ollivers first dietitian appointment after months of not being seen.

His new consultant is from a child development centre the same centre that olliver is on a waiting list to be seen about him being monitored and assessed for possible autism. 

anyway olliver started playing up before we even got to sit down in the room with this new consultant, he was running around the waiting room climbing on everything jumping up and down throwing toys pushing his sister the list goes on at this point i knew this appointment was not going to go well. 

three meltdowns later and a time out on the hospitals plastic chairs and it was our turn to go in, at first he wouldn’t go through the double doors leading to the room then once we managed to concur the double doors he was charging down the hall way refusing to go in to this room, at this point i was ready to call it quits but i stuck at it and got him in the room, next came the kicking the screaming and me trying to sit there and hold a conversation with this poor women who had no idea where to look, mum even tried to get ollie to calm down and sit still but he wasn’t having it. 

within five minutes the appointment was done after ollie picked up one of the childrens chairs and through it across the room that was it, time to leave he wasn’t settling he wasn’t interested and he definitely did not want to be there. despite all of his best efforts we did manage to get him weighed inbetween all the commotion and i’m glad to say olliver has gone from being just under 20lbs to now weighing 28lbs to a lot of people that wouldn’t seem like much but after almost two years fighting to get him to gain weight at last we have succeeded. 

he has now been discharged from the dietitians but he will remain on the waiting list to see a specialist about his lack of development and his behaviour. 

it’s safe to say i am one very tired mumma today and i can not wait to get in to my bed and go to sleep.  

[mandyevents]

Lockdown

Life in lockdown where do I begin. What a stressful first few months it was ciaos the cues for shops. Everyone growling at you if you as much as coughed beside them. It was nothing I ever experienced before in my whole entire life. Me and Zak spent most of lockdown just baking cakes or having movie days he was 2-year-old at this point so I had no clue what to do with him as he was always bored! So, summer came and Zak finally got his placement at nursery ready I was ready more than ever to go back to college and stick to it for the sake of it’s the best thing for us and knowing this is what my gran really wants me to do I put the head down and started Level 5 Events.

Our life consisted of going to the nursery back to do zoom calls for college then doing nursery runs and staying in the rest of the night for dinners and baths for the next day but we got ourselves into a good routine and we eventually made it work.

My life isn’t what it meant to look like for a teenager but in my eyes, I wouldn’t change all the nappy changings or any part of being a mum to go back to my partying side of me again as this me is the best version of me and I wouldn’t have changed into this person if I didn’t have my son at 16. No matter what age you are anyone can be a good parent if you put your mind to it I have had so many people talking about me or looking at me different because I had a baby so young but I wouldn’t ever change it.

[katieprattartist]

Mum in 1988 looking young, beautiful, happy and not at all scary. #jillrosenheim #youngmum @jo10008 https://www.instagram.com/p/CNkJhAIFysP/?igshid=1i4w8iwn8rhna

[xantheduffy-blog]

4 WEEK SELF-CARE CHALLENGE - FREE DOWNLOAD

YOUR GUIDE TO MY 4 WEEK SELF-CARE CHALLENGE

Why did you create this 4 Week Self-Care Challenge?

Self-care is something that I really need to focus on, and I knew I wouldn’t be in this alone. So I created this FREE guide to share with you. I hope that you will be able to find the will take control over your life and wellbeing.

After trying to adapt to the transition from 0-2 kids, you really stop focusing on your own happiness and wellbeing. It becomes so easy to push your own self-care aside, because you spend your days focused on how to make everyone else’s lives easier, happier and better, rather than your own. You tell yourself you are too busy and you simply don’t have the time of day.

Why should I try out this challenge?

You should try out the 4 Week-Self Care Challenge because your happiness, mind, body, and lifestyle matters. This FREE guide is the right push in the right direction. Self-care is the road to a better you and a better life.

As a mother of two, I do understand finding the right time is difficult, but its not impossible. Put the effort into yourself, and the universe will give back to you.

FEATURES:

Yoga or walk or workout

Drink 2-3L water

Meditate 10 minutes

Self-care 10 mins (Includes ideas, such as: drink lemon water, have a healthy smoothie, listen to music etc.)

Daily Gratitude

Beach/Forest trip

Watch a documentary

ALSO…

FREE daily gratitude template (in case you don’t own a journal)

If you have any other challenge ideas you would be interested in me creating for you, comment, or email me: xantheduffy@hotmail.com x