#you will never be heidegger let it go

[ghostspies]

[rottenpumpkin13]

what advice(s) would Lazard if a newbie (not Zack, just some random dude) got into the First Rank SOLDIERs?

Lazard: Alright, welcome to First Class. Let me give you some survival tips so you don't end up in the infirmary, therapy, or in a coffin.

Lazard: Never mention family trees around Sephiroth. Or family. Or trees in general. He rarely sees them and feels personally offended when one is free to gaze upon a tree in public without being on an assignment.

Lazard: Never bring up hair care products when Genesis and Sephiroth are in the same room. Last time someone did, we lost three conference rooms, the annual budget, and half of Heidegger's mustache in the crossfire.

Lazard: Never ask Angeal why he doesn't use the Buster Sword. That will turn into a lecture. If you value your time, just assume it's sacred and move on. If you slip up, sit down. You're going to be there a while.

Lazard: If Sephiroth ever gets that look, do not ask what he's thinking. You will come out of it traumatized and therapy isn't covered by SOLDIER.

Lazard: If Genesis ever challenges you to a duel over 'a matter of pride,' just fake your death. Better yet, throw yourself down the stairs. He respects the drama and will let you go.

Lazard: If Sephiroth stares into the distance for more than ten seconds, gently nudge him. He's either lost in thought, planning the downfall of civilization, or contemplating adopting a cat again.

Lazard: If Zack comes to you and says 'I have a great idea!' do NOT listen. That's how the last squad ended up fighting robotic chocobos in the VR room. I had to explain that to the President.

Lazard: If you hear a loud explosion and nobody screams, it's just a Tuesday. If you hear a loud explosion AND screaming? Check if Genesis is on the premises first.

Lazard: If Sephiroth smiles, something is very wrong. Either he's pleased with something, which is unlikely, or you're in immediate danger, which is very likely.

[foreststarflaime]

Me and @stargazing-zani were bored so have this list of what partner pokemon the ff7 crew would have

The Banora boys get the Applin variants. Genesis gets a Flapple and Angeal has an Appletun

Genesis also tries to deflect attention onto his much flashier Ceruledge in public tho

Angeal was also given an Aegislash by his father which he nicknamed Buster. Buster has seen too much as it’s passed down to Zack and then Cloud in turn, watching its partners suffer but unable to form the words to comfort them

Hojo tries and tries to get Sephiroth something big, ultra-powerful and intimidating, but Seph is set on the adorable Mew which found him and refused to leave his side. Still a mythical so Hojo lets him keep it but is very miffed

Cloud was adopted by a Galarian Zapdos bc chocobo. I don’t make the rules. I do feel like the character arc the Sobble line goes through fits him really well tho

Zack has an unevolved Rockruff for quite a while. When it eventually does evolve, no matter what time of day it is, it will inevitably evolve into Midday Lycanroc because Zack’s sunny personality is overwhelming

Aerith has a Tinkaton. They’re perfect for each other

I don’t know how to explain it but Mudsdale gives me Tifa vibes, also it was a powerhouse when I had it on my team and I love it

Hojo created a Mewtwo bc all other pokemon rejected him, but it immediately turned on its creator and murders him violently, preventing all problems and fixing everything without the need for time travel

Insane Seph got a Deoxys bc creepy alien. Maybe it is Jenova in this universe and starts corrupting him as soon as he gets it driving him insane

Rufus gets a Houndoom bc that’s basically what Darkstar is anyways

Cait Sith is basically just Meowth already, I don’t need to do much here. Maybe Perrserker to be the version from the Scotland area Pokemon game

Alternatively for Reeve I feel like Duraludon works, bc urban development and it reminds me of the Neo Midgar concepts

Heidegger gets either a Skuntank or a Granbull, idk which but vibes

Hehehe Vincent has a Cofagrigus

I bestow upon Yuffie the honor of Thievul. Loved it on my team and they both have the little shit vibes. She would also be an evil team grunt stealing everyone else’s pokemon tho, and honestly good for her go crazy Yuffie

I know for Kunsel it’s always the hack-y technology vibes. But consider. Always hiding behind a mask, never see his face. Mimikyu

Barret? Absol. Avalanche, impending disaster, perfect

I feel like Rude would like Urshifu

It would be absolutely hilarious to me then if Reno just had an Emolga

Scarlet with a Metagross

Why is Tseng so hard. Inteleon perhaps for the spy-y stuff

For Veld maybe a Wishiwashi for the Turk’s whole stronger in numbers found family thing

Oh dear god while writing this I thought too much about the implications of SOLDIER still existing in a world where pokemon battles replaced normal fighting. Maybe it was an experiment to splice human dna with pokemon to get humans to be able to fight using pokemon moves too? So like you go up against a SOLDIER, faint all 6 of their pokemon and think yay I’ve won, and then the SOLDIER just starts going after your pokemon themselves. They are their own 7th pokemon

[altocat]

rank how much sephiroth likes each shinra director from most to least.

(In the order descending)

MOST TIER:

Lazard: Sephiroth genuinely liked and cared for Lazard. They weren't friends but there was genuine respect and fondness there. Sephiroth was quietly upset when it turned out that Lazard had betrayed them. He indisputably liked Lazard the most out of all of them.

Reeve: Sephiroth is indifferent to Reeve. Personally, he views Reeve as weak and ineffectual. Most of the time, he forgets Reeve even exists. But he also recognizes that Reeve is the only one besides Lazard with some sense of ethics and tact. So that gets him serious points.

Scarlet: Sephiroth DOES NOT like Scarlet. But he does respect her. He views her as the strongest candidate for leadership in the event things go south. While he loathes her personality, he can respect her ambition and drive.

EVERYONE ELSE (BOTTOM TIER)

Palmer: Sephiroth is indifferent to him the same way he's indifferent to Reeve. But the difference is that he finds Palmer creepy and possibly inbred. Don't ask him how he suspects this. He won't answer you.

President Shinra: Sephiroth recognizes on many levels that President Shinra is responsible for his life being a living hellscape. While he's resigned himself to that and has sworn his undying loyalty to the man, Sephiroth does not care for him personally. He can at least respect President Shinra for his dominance and resourcefulness as a businessman. But Sephiroth still doesn't like the fact that he's basically the personal attack dog for this massive douche.

Rufus Shinra: Same principles for President Shinra, except Sephiroth hates Rufus infinitely more. Rufus bullied Sephiroth as a child and Sephiroth never let go of that grudge. He'd be extremely loyal to Rufus if the other was president, but that doesn't change the fact that he hates Rufus' guts.

Heidegger: Sephiroth has no respect at all for Heidegger, and probably wouldn't listen to him under orders. Heidegger is a complete buffoon in his eyes. A waste of a man. Sephiroth would sooner cut him to pieces than obey him.

Hojo: No comment 💀

[case-of-traxits]

I’m sure you’ve probably talked about this before, but how do you think reeve’s inspire works?

So funny fact here: I've never actually formally meta'd about this publicly. I'm pretty sure. I've talked to a few individuals about it, but never in like, a definitive, "This is definitely how I think it works," sort of way.

Maybe it's time to change that?

First though, let's talk about why I use the Inspire ability at all, because a lot of that leads into how I think it works.

An Argument for Why I Use the Inspire Ability

I would love to start with Reeve's original bio, but of course, as we know, Reeve didn't get a bio in the original game manual. So instead, we're forced to rely on his Ultimania bio:

The head of the Urban Development Department. Involved in the construction of Midgar from the very beginning, he watches over the town’s development like that of a child. By utilizing his special ability, “Inspire”, he is able to cause inorganic things to emit life; his “child”, the “cat”-shaped robot, Cait Sith can be controlled from a great distance. After Meteorfall, he became the director of the World Regenesis Organization (WRO), which is devoted to the purpose of restoring life to the planet.

For what it's worth, Reeve's bio has been shockingly consistent with including his Inspire ability. I go into that a little bit over in my WRO Reeve + Heartbreak meta.

Now, I know a lot of people don't like the Ultimanias. They find them confusing, or contradictory, or whatever the current "I don't use them," reason of the day is. That's fine! Let's take a look at Cait Sith's original bio from the game manual:

Cait Sith rides on the back of a huge stuffed Mog he magically brought to life. Megaphone in hand, he's always shouting orders and creating dopey attacks...

So there you go. Mog and Cait Sith cannot simply be robots, since it's stated quite plainly that Cait Sith brought Mog to life magically.

(As a side note, Cait Sith in the OG comes equipped with the Manipulate materia. This is a fun multi-layered reference, don't you think? Pokes a note at him being a spy and kind of gives you a thing to consider about how he possibly controls Mog.)

(As a second side note, Cait Sith also has one of the highest magic/spirit scores in the OG, so he's clearly meant to be your caster.)

Now, that said, Reeve clearly did build Cait Sith as a robot. His Ultimania profile clearly refers to Cait Sith as a robot, and in BC, Cait Sith has a controller of some kind in his back, and he gets damaged and broken into pieces and the Player Turk has to put him back together.

(As a side note there— and I swear, I'll stop doing these soon— if I recall correctly, the pieces the Player Turk has to collect are the body, the head, and the crown, implying that Cait Sith's crown is in fact an important part of him, and not just a cute fashion accessory.)

In addition, it is worth noting that Rufus Shinra is well aware of Cait Sith and that Reeve "controls" him, and yet, Reeve is able to directly communicate with AVALANCHE during a board meeting where Scarlet and Heidegger are talking Rufus into loading up No. 26, the rocket from Rocket Town, with huge materia and crashing it into Meteor in an attempt to save the world. Reeve not only does this, but Rufus gives no outward indication that he's aware of it. So however Reeve "controls" Cait Sith, there must not be a visible component to it.

My point is that Cait Sith, from what canon shows us, appears to be a robot that Reeve can control directly, without need for any sort of external control system. And, based on some thoughts that Cait Sith has during BC that cannot reasonably be attributed to Reeve, Cait Sith is still somehow independent of Reeve himself.

So why don't I go with Cait Sith simply being a learning AI of some kind? Well, mostly because of Mog. If we go back to the original bio for Cait Sith, it reads very similarly to Reeve's Ultimania bio. So Reeve grants life to Cait Sith, who can, in turn, grant life to Mog.

Functionally, Cait Sith is a mini-Inspire of his own.

Canon Exploration of the Inspire Ability

Now that I've written out my premise for why I go with Inspire Reeve, let's get to the heart of the original question:  How do I think it works?

Well, let's look at what we have to work with:

[Ultimania Bio] Reeve causes inorganic things to "emit" life.

[Ultimania Bio] Reeve sees Cait Sith as a child.

[OG Game Bio] Cait Sith inherits the Inspire ability.

[OG/BC/DoC] Cait Sith is capable of acting autonomously.

[OG/BC/DoC] Cait Sith can be directly controlled (to some extent, at least) via Reeve.

[OG] Reeve can speak through Cait Sith without other people in the room noticing.

[OtWtaS] Multiple Cait Siths can be 'active' at a time.

[DoC] Reeve and Cait Sith can move in sync with one another.

[DoC] Even if Cait Sith 'dies,' he can somehow convey information he learned right up until his death to Reeve/other Cait Siths.

How Does the Ability Actually Work?

So, with all of this in mind, here's how I usually go with Reeve's ability working:

The short answer is that I see it as a low-key, always-on mental connection between Reeve and Cait Sith.

A longer explanation starts with the fact that I see Reeve's Inspire ability as sort of... it has both passive and active modes for me.  Basically, in the passive mode, Reeve is always influencing inorganic material around him.  It's more noticeable when his emotions are heightened, but things like his phone and his car develop... quirks.  His car isn't really conscious, exactly, but it does read his intent, and to some extent, it basically functions as a self-driving vehicle when Reeve is the one behind the wheel.

Now, for my Reeve in particular, this is in no small part because the car was his father's, and he has worked on it extensively over the years.  It's a classic car, basically, and it gives him an outlet for fiddly work that's outside and not in a reactor or tied to Shinra.  If you're going with a Reeve who doesn't love his car as much, then obviously, that probably would be a bit more odd.

A more common variant on this, I think, would probably be that I usually roll with Reeve having... partially Inspired the reactors.  All of them.  All of the ones he has access to.  And in this case, it's less because he wants them to be alive and more because he wants to have that access to them.  He wants to be able to check statuses and know what's going on with a reactor at any given moment, and no matter how advanced the tech is, nothing will be faster for him than a direct mental connection.

Of course, that can have some less than stellar side effects when, say, a reactor explodes.  @ladykf-writes wrote me some amazing ficlets that feature my headcanons about this after much rambling with her about them. So I highly recommend checking those out if you're interested in this idea.

Then he has the active mode of his ability. I've written a ficlet (Heritage and Legacies) about the process of actually Inspiring Cait Sith (and it makes mention of Reeve's first disastrous accidental Inspiration), but in short, it involves more or less willing the inanimate object to life.  I usually go with the explanation that Reeve is literally feeding the object a bit of his own personal lifestream (or soul, depending on how you want to talk about it) until it starts circulating it on its own.  This gives me a built in explanation for why he doesn't animate hundreds of things at once and such.  I do like to have caps on things.

But because it was his personal lifestream that he used, he can basically retain... think of like a narrow, unseen string between Cait Sith and Reeve, no matter how far apart they get. And across this string, they can send thoughts, memories, and sensations.  That's how Reeve knew what happened to Cait Sith when Nero ate him with shadows.  Cait Sith had immediately connected with Reeve and told him.

Now, I do a few hand-wavey things for my own sanity when writing.  I assume that when a Cait Sith dies, all of their memories get imprinted in Reeve's mind, and when he Inspires the next Cait Sith, they get a copy of all of those memories.  This can create a bit of a jarring dissonance within the memories for a new Cait Sith, as they might remember being Cait Sith 1 and being Cait Sith 2 in the same conversation.  But for the most part, it works.

The other thing I usually do with Cait Sith specifically is that I say that when he was first Inspired, he was very much like a baby or a toddler.  He needed to learn a lot of things.  I don't have any fics currently up featuring this (I will after the holiday events though), but basically, I go with it having taken Reeve a while to get Cait Sith to talk at all for example, and that he had to learn a lot of things on his own rather than relying on Reeve's memory of the things.

Now, because of the hand-wavey memory thing I already talked about, new Cait Siths don't have that same initial problem.  They basically just get imprinted with everything Cait Sith 1 learned before he died.

(And for what it's worth, since Cait Sith's accent is supposed to be based on Reeve's parents, I always go with Cait Sith not speaking at all for a few months after he was Inspired.  Reeve tried everything, from toddler help books to reading books to trying to bribe him, and couldn't get a single word out of him.  And then, finally, Reeve was on the phone with his mother, trying to discreetly ask her for advice without admitting to his abilities or to what he'd done, and when he hung up the phone, Cait Sith looked up at him and spoke for the first time.  In the accent Reeve hadn't realized he'd slipped back into with his mother.)

The other hand-wavey thing I do is that I usually have Reeve and Cait Sith share the ability to communicate mind-to-mind, no outward dialogue needed.  I mostly justify this with it being a side-effect of them sharing the same personal lifestream rhythm.

I will say though, something I do that I don't know that I've seen anyone else do (I don't have any fics left up featuring this either, actually) is that I say the control can go both ways.  So Reeve can reach for Cait Sith and speak through him, but so can Cait Sith.  Now, I usually say that Reeve has to let Cait Sith do this, whereas Reeve can just take control from Cait Sith, but I  chalk that up to Reeve being the one who did the initial Inspiring.  Following that suit though, it would make sense that Cait Sith could do the same thing with Mog, if he wanted.

Now, I also headcanon that Reeve does his absolute best to let Cait Sith have whatever autonomy he can.  My Reeve, in particular, didn't exactly have the happiest of childhoods, and he has spent a lot of time being told exactly what he can do and when, so he tries to give Cait Sith the childhood he never had.

If you read all the way down here, oh my goodness, but thank you.  It's... a lot.  Like I said earlier, the short answer is that I see it as a low-key, always-on mental connection between Reeve and Cait Sith.  And I kind of flex it around, depending on what exactly I'm doing with the fic in question.

[cwarscars]

headcanon | fight or flight / a life under scrutiny

this started as a somewhat small headcanon about heidegger being permanently in fight mode due to his experiences as a soldier / bodyguard / head of security for the most powerful family in the world and it turned into a big waffle about his whole entire life being under scrutiny and his disgustingly high standards. buckle in, this bad boy got waffly. i do apologise~

something i wanted to write a quick thing on recently is the idea of heidegger being in fight mode 24/7. i've always liked to make it so that he is a bit of a workaholic ( that doesn't mean he isn't lazy, he absolutely is! but he's in the office 24/7 ). the main reason i see him as being so dedicated to shinra / the military is because partially he's so indoctrinated by it but also because he never stopped living it.

there's that whole idea that a war never ends - like, a soldier can come out of battle but then he's fighting another ( inside himself ). and that's how i see heidegger as being, it's a large part of my characterisation for him and is usually the crux of why i write certain headcanons the way i do / why i write him the way i do.

the idea of him being always in fight mode is that he's always switched on / on edge. he's ready to lash out at even a mere look. it's part of the reason why he's such a bully, why he's so aggressive, in people's faces, takes everything so brashly. even relatively harmless people like palmer aren't even safe from his ire. he's so angry, so 'locked in' to his past and the things he's seen / done, that the battle is still ongoing.

now let me go all nerd emoji on you and show some reasons why i'm dying on this hill -

let's start w/remake baby. we get the scene of him with the soldiers in the control room - when he gets all wound up by their incompetence ( they're not, heid is immensely impatient because he has high expectations ). in this scene, he says -

" have you already forgotten the war with wutai ? "

that war ended 5 + years ago and his line here is spoken like a man who lived that shit. a man who is not over it. a man who is STILL there. and as said above, it all contributes to this fight or flight instinct he's in ( very much the /fight/ mode instinct ).

another example is the boardroom scene when palmer dares to get on heid's nerves for like .2 seconds;

palmer is legit just arguing that he's seen seph, which heid deems as nonsense - when palmer pushes it, heid slams his fist down and gets up and ALMOST in his face. i say ALMOST because he stops himself.

another reason is from rebirth - when rufus confronts cloud/tifa/aerith at junon; the moment heid realises, he's rushes forward on alert and is called off by rufus. to him, he's seen their enemy and all he wants to do is have them killed, he's immediate to want them dead.

i like the idea that heidegger is old enough to know better than to just go mad at people whenever he disagrees with them. he's got enough years and wisdom now that he can JUST ABOUT stop himself ( of course, i imagine he doesn't always abide by this and almost certainly breaks his own rules when pushed enough ).

but yeah, the main reason WHY he's like this is because of his fight / flight mode being permanent switched to on. as far as he's concerned, everybody is an enemy, everybody is a terrorist.

he might seem kind of lazy, reluctant, rude or dismissive, but look at this man the wrong way? give him a bit of attitude? question him?

oh, he is NOT gonna be happy.

as for a life under scrutiny, well -

think of it this way. in my headcanon, i always wrote about wars around midgar to do with shinra ( it turned out to be junon but i wasn't far off! ) and though my hc isn't super in line with the universe, i still retain my idea that heidegger's father ran a security firm akin to the diamond dogs that eventually became shinra's contracted service for security. i still retain my idea that heidegger ended up HAVING to take this over and was essentially forced into the role of bodyguard / elite soldier after being mentally ravaged by early civil wars.

we're talking about a man in his late 20s who was raised in a military family, a military school, a military career. who was pulled between brothers ( and i call them brothers because that's what his squads would have been to him ). this is a man who was told at the age of around 28 - your life is now DEDICATED to this family. you keep them safe, you live and you DIE for them. it is your JOB, your DUTY, your HONOUR. whatever you want to call it to make yourself feel better, this is your life now.

heidegger would scrutinise everything around him - every threat, every potential threat. every non-threat that looks SLIGHTLY like a threat. he checks not once, twice, three times but twenty+ times. he is suspicious of EVERYONE. i imagine many attempts were made on shinra's life - whose responsibility would it be to stop these, fix these, quell these, fight these? heidegger. nobody else.

man would live his life for someone else entirely - and it's one of the reasons why heid is such a bastard to his soldiers. i have spoken before about how and why he's so mean to the people around him. a mixture of anger, sadism, resentment etc. but high expectations is never one i really played with. but it most certainly is part of why he's so cruel to his soldiers.

he expects them to be the fucking best and anything less than that infuriates him. he doesn't see soldiers, he sees weaklings who couldn't fight their way out of a paper bag ( let alone a war ). now this might not be fair, it more than likely isn't - but it's because he's so incredibly critical of the details around him ( aside from himself, tee hee ). he's lived his whole life under scrutiny ( from those around him ) and has lived his whole life scrutinising the security surrounding him, too - it's partially why he's such an ass.

to further this point, as i know some people will argue 'but han, my man, heid fucks up several times and there are multiple breaches in security - he can't be that good!'

he aint that good homies

well, what if it told you - this ties in with another headcanon of mine. heid's whack-ass blood pressure / heart problems? man was ordered to calm the fuck down and let his soldiers / team work; part of the reasons for breaches in security are him taking his eye off of the ball. partially for his own health, partially while getting drunk on the job ( another hc, i've talked about this ).

basically, all in all, i am v v v v sad and heidegger has never left my brain lmao

[chewbokachoi]

Rough Landing, Holly

Cid's muscles burned but he kept going.

There were more monsters–he just knew there were more to fight. And this group needed him. They were in need of a pilot, a sailor–they needed somebody to look out for them. Sure they had Barret, but even he needed somebody to look out for him. It was better to have two experienced people with a bunch of kids–

"That's enough." A cold voice commanded.

Cid planted his spear into the ground and leaned against it, trying to look cool and hide he was panting. "You sure 'bout that? You didn't seem sure enough on how to help hold a wrench."

Vincent didn't let the jab get to him. It was hard to tell how set his jaw was with it hidden by that overly dramatic collar of the cape. "You're soaked. I don't know how much of it is blood or sweat. With how you're panting, I may assume it's mostly sweat."

Cid felt a muscle below his eye twitch. "Wanna try that again?"

"We're fine. The party is safe," Vincent said.

Cid turned and spat. Like anybody was ever going to be safe. Not when the likes of Shin-Ra were still around. Scarlet and her bloodlust. Heidegger and his desire for a never ending battle. Hojo…

Cid twisted the spear deeper into the dirt. "Fucking pieces of shit," he muttered.

"It's dead–"

"No it isn't," Cid snarled.

Written to "Rough Landing, Holly" by Yellowcard

[salternateunreality2]

Cloud’s Oral Fixation (PG version) (AGSZC)

From the @strayheartless archives. The idea of Zack being crafty comes from them, especially re: necklaces <3

—

Cloudy having an oral fixation and just quietly nibbling on his boyfriends. Head in neck? Nom nom nom. Near ear lobe? Mlem mlem mlem. Gnaws on gloved hands. Chews on hair. Just. Always. Licking.

Birds have to wear down their beaks, wolf puppies have to chew on things–Cloud just was never going to win. Bonus: he’s from Nibbleheim, hehehehehehehehehe ok ok I’ll see myself out.

—

Zack: *getting into it, licking him back*

Cloud: *shocked and disgusted pikachu*

AGS: BRUH.

—-

He had to cut his hair to stop chewing on it and now Genesis and Sephiroth have to watch him in case he goes after theirs. They like when he idly strokes and plays with everyone's hair, but if he's cozy and sleepy, it's only a matter of time before CHOMP.

Angeal always carrying gum for him.

When he's really sleepy, he'll slow-lick the nearest patch of skin, like a sleepy cat or dog. Mlemmm, mlemmm, mlemmm.

Zack makes him a necklace to chew on and it helps SO MUCH. He makes one with lots of sea glass, so there's always a piece that's dry and cool, which his lil Nibel heart loves.

—--

Most of the time Cloud’s shy enough that he keeps physical affection as a strictly private activity, but sometimes Spiteful Strife comes out and compels him to crawl on the nearest boyfriend and show off or glare at the world.

Angeal: Well, shall we- Cloud? What? 

Cloud, settling in his lap: That bitch Karen said gays were gross. Kiss me.

–

Y'all thought Seph was possessive. Boy, y'ain't met Strife yet, have you?

They hear the sound of camera shutters in the bushes. 

Cloud: Geal I'm going to bite them. 

Angeal: *holding him back* Baby, just ignore them.

Paparazzo: Sephiroth, how's your moth- 

Angeal: *releases the kraken*

Later... 

Paparazzo: Please let us go, haven't we suffered enough?!?! *Bloody, bruised, missing chunks* 

Turks: This was the little blond one's doing, wasn't it? 

Paparazzo: 😭 yes 😭

Turks: Then you deserved it. Now hand over the cameras.

—-

Sephiroth in a board meeting, Cloud in his lap, chewing on his necklace. 

Shinra: What is that trooper doing in here?!?! 

Hojo: Sephiroth, put that thing down right now! 

Cloud: *growls like a full blown Nibel wolf, drool spilling ominously from the corners of his mouth* 

Sephiroth: No. 

Genesis: For your own safety, I advise you to let this go. 

Angeal: Genesis is not exaggerating. 

Heidegger, who learned the hard way last week: *vigorous nodding*

—-

[talesfantastic]

Picking up the Pieces | Anya & Tseng

@reapersxfolly asked:

Happy Birthday! Also; Dealer's choice :]

You have no idea how much I've wanted to test Anya out with a fellow Turk, let alone such a solid Turk RPer. Thank you for the present, Mae. (You can find her here). HMU if I need to change anything. I read your stuff and this felt ok?

Veld was dead. It was hard to process that as real. She had a feeling he was going to get himself killed, a feeling that had settled in the back of her mind like the rumble of low thunder in the distance when Vincent had been declared MIA, then KIA. The rumbles had grown stronger, at times. After Kalm.

It had finally brought lightning when he found Elfe, and she had known he was lost to them. Her gaze turned to the one he had groomed to be his replacement one day, her loyalties -- always to the Turks -- followed. And when the dust began to settle, she did a little housekeeping of the academy, mindful that there was a chance they would tell her to stop training Turks, and that then she would have to initiate certain protocols that had long lain dormant. That was a problem for another day.

Instead, she composed a full and detailed report of Junon activities -- more complete than she'd have bothered Veld with, but she and Tseng did not have the same history; he needed to know she was firmly on his side -- and submitted it directly to Tseng through secure channels it would never dawn on Heidegger to check.

She didn't know if Tseng would be given the Director's chair or if they'd make the mistake of trying to keep them from rebuilding, but with Veld out of the picture, Tseng was her director now as far as it mattered. She had been around too long for anyone to honestly expect otherwise.

So she sent the reports, and then, in place of her usual signature, said,

When you call, I will answer Shiv

[snowbanshee]

How do you think Sephiroth realizes he has feelings for Lazard? And vice versa.

(Sorry if you've already talked about it on this blog)

Oh my goodness, please do not apologise for sending me an ask about my favourite topic, this made my (looks at the clock)... uh... week.

So I do have long and needlessly complicated headcanons about this specific topic and I have at least 3 variations of how that happened, some of them are so sad they would make Nomura cry.

But back to the topic.

There were many factors that added up. Sephiroth was the property of Research and Development. SOLDIER department was supposed to be founded (before that it was simply a program, not a department) and Sephiroth was supposed to answer to Heidegger, but after a lot of meetings, bickering and hurt egos, Lazard was promoted to that position. After returning from the war, Sephiroth was too depressed to even bother to get to know people. He knew Hojo, he knew Heidegger, he knew ShinRa, there was no reason to assume Lazard was any different.

First thing Sephiroth noticed was how different Lazard and Hojo were. Lazard was all about tailoring the missions to SOLDIERs strengths and weaknesses, likes and dislikes. He encouraged his men to talk about themselves and never used that information as ammunition against them. How naturally safe and comfortable it felt being vulnerable around him. How much he cared about physical and mental wellbeing of SOLDIERs and even went on missions to do as much for his men as possible. How easy it was for Lazard to admit that he doesn't know something, but is willing to learn. How effortlessly Lazard balanced the fine line between being their boss and being a gentle guardian, always pleasant, always accommodating. This was how Sephiroth realised he didn't need all those walls and masks as they were only getting in the way.

The second thing was Lazard's self-respect and healthy attitude. Despite being the youngest director and working with some of the Planet's most fucked up people, Lazard did not let others mistreat him and always spoke up. Sephiroth became fascinated with Lazard's self-love, ability to forgive himself if he miscalculated, his resilience and well... the lack of self-destructive habits. Everyone else Sephiroth knew was punishing themselves one way or another. Lazard treated himself with respect and encouraged others to do it. This realisation made Sephiroth interested in Lazard, not necessarily in a romantic way, but Sephiroth did go out of his way to spend time in Lazard's office. There Sephiroth noticed how talented, hard working, efficient smart and capable the new director was.

What made Sephiroth realise he really wanted Lazard in his life forever was Lazard's willingness to face Sephiroth's inner demons with no prejudice or fear. All those parts that Sephiroth decided were vile, shameful, inhuman and simply wrong were accepted, respected and loved.

Now, let's talk about Lazard. He did have a mother that loved him very much, but there were so many times he was beaten up or his things were taken away, because he wasn't strong enough to fight off other kids in the slums. Encouraged by his mother, Lazard pursued education as a way to escape the slums and never hoped to be physically strong enough to win fights. He saw Rufus on TV, never hungry, never beaten up, always near their father. There was some longing in Lazard's heart. At first he noticed other boys with their fathers. Later he noticed boys and girls with their boyfriends.

And while Lazard joined ShinRa only to make sure it fell apart, he knew being surrounded by SOLDIERs was going to be... distracting. Lazard knew about Sephiroth long before meeting him. He promised himself not to fall in love, despite Sephiroth being exactly his type. And he kept that promise for the entire 3 seconds of their first meeting. Then he fell for Sephiroth, hard, but didn't act upon it for years, because he had a position to secure and Sephiroth was drowning in trauma. Years later, when SOLDIER was a well established and respected department, when Sephiroth was much healthier and happier, Lazard sent Sephiroth on a rather boring mission to a remote and beautiful location and decided to join him.

[vinjaryou]

🧡🤍

from the 'ask game: unpopular opinion edition <3'

🧡: What is a popular (serious) theory you disagree with?

Vincent Valentine...

Sorry not sorry, Hojo fathered Sephiroth.

I don't care if Sephiroth and Vincent have similar facial meshes (that's done so often in games, that if you use this as a reason, then Tifa and Elena are sisters), I don't care if "BUT HOJO'S SO UGLY" (you inherit from BOTH parents; he got his looks from his mother[s], and personality from his father), I don't care if you subscribe to the belief that Vincent and Lucrecia slept together even once...

Sephiroth's parents are Hojo, Lucrecia Crescent, and if you want to include them, Jenova.

Vincent's part of it was being the bodyguard for the Jenova Project, falling in love with Lucrecia, being rejected by her, being murdered by Hojo, and then being resurrected by both Hojo and Lucrecia to be used as a test subject.

He feels guilt for Sephiroth being born because he feels he could've stopped it.

He feels guilt for telling Lucrecia her son is dead, knowing he is the harbinger of the potential end of the world (also lying about him being dead).

Nowhere in there is guilt for said harbinger being his son. He never even utters the possibility, and as for his own reaction when Hojo admits it? Most likely the fact that Hojo even uses such a term in reference to himself and Sephiroth, as Hojo is known for referring to others with more inhumane terms (i.e. 'specimen'). To hear him refer to Sephiroth as his SON implies that at one point, Hojo actually cared for him and saw him as more than just a means to further his theories.

So no, I do not subscribe to the VinDad theory. Never have, never will.

🤍: Which character is not as morally bad as everyone else seems to think?

Kyrie Canaan.

Yes, she is annoying. Yes, she pulls all sorts of shit on Cloud to get him to do her work for her while she takes the credit. Yes, she is a manipulative gossip and a thief.

She is also the product of Shinra fucking over the people of Midgar so much that she's turned to thievery and manipulation in order to get by. Even her grandmother Mirelle (the self-proclaimed 'Angel of the Slums') says that Kyrie is a child who needs guidance more than anything, while admitting to the error of her own ways in teaching her. Yuffie feels for her - as irritating as she says Kyrie is - and Cloud lets her go with a threat, but it's more implied to be a way for her to get her head on straight and figure herself out (scare the hell out of her to get her to realize what she's getting herself into).

She is irresponsible, yes. She is also still a teenager - barely older than Yuffie when we meet her - and as evidenced in 'The Kids Are All Right: A Turks' Side Story,' she does start to change her ways.

I can forgive Kyrie much more than I can forgive someone like Heidegger, Scarlet, or Hojo.

[ckret2]

What does Goldie think of all the different bodily functions they now has to deal with? Like gas, boogers, ear wax, upset stomach, throwing up, having to go to the bathroom, clipping nails etc etc

For the vast majority of his new human functions, Bill doesn't care about them nearly as much as you might think he would.

Gas? Meh; apathetic. First time Bill gets that painful really bad gas, he thinks one of his internal organs must've fatally malfunctioned; when he learns that's just what gas sometimes feels like to humans, he no longer cares—about the gas OR the pain. Lacks the ability to tell the difference between what humans think are "good" and "bad" smells.

Boogers? Meh; apathetic. If he has a really gross sneeze, his first instinct is to just lick it off his lip. Doesn't understand why this makes people look at him like he's just turned his rib cage inside out. Does it really matter that much WHICH face hole the slime is in? Humans already put up with being a bizarre medley of squelching fluids and goos, and THAT'S where they draw the line??

Ear wax? Meh; apathetic. Rarely has a reason to remember it exists.

Upset stomach? He has an astounding ability to power through nausea and keep on doing whatever he was doing, which would be even more amazing if it was due to an iron willpower rather than due to some failure in his brain to register the possibility that his condition could improve (or at least not get worse) if he rests and recovers. An upset stomach will make him as miserable as any other human; but he'll just keep doing whatever he's doing until it fixes itself or becomes debilitating. He deals with most forms of discomfort this way.

Throwing up? From Bill's perspective, taking psychedelic substances is a spiritually liberating act that can teach you how little the delicate permeable surface of your body really separates you from the universe around you, and can open your mind up to the soaring vistas of all-of-time and all-of-space; and puking is the exact opposite of that. It collapses all of time and space into a single stuffy, claustrophobic, endless pinpoint of agony. Thus far Bill's found no other experience that can quite so intimately reconnect him with his body, and he hates it. But he doesn't hate it enough that it'll teach him not to do whatever he did that made him sick in the first place. His digestive tract won't be the master of him.

Going to the bathroom? Meh; apathetic. Just a couple more fluids/goos to deal with. The most annoying part is that humans are so unreasonably PICKY about when and where and how you eject it and the complicated cleansing rituals that follow. ("Bill was not born a flesh animal" = "Bill lacks a flesh animal's instinctive aversion to disease-harboring waste." Plus, that whole "can't tell what smells are bad" thing.) It takes several weeks to completely housebreak Bill, mostly because he's outraged at the suggestion that he should have to conform to his jailers' weird arbitrary cultural taboos. It's a deeply harrowing experience for the humans.

Clipping nails? He's never done it. These things eventually break and tear down to a more manageable length if you leave them to their own devices long enough. He's unwilling to admit that having them cut short is SLIGHTLY more convenient; but he's realized that if he lets Mabel paint his nails, he can trick her into trimming them for him. (From Mabel's perspective, she's realized that if she offers to paint Bill's nails, she can trick him into letting her trim his nails. Also, she gets to pick the colors. Win-win.)

Etc etc:

He loathes brushing his hair—for reasons the humans can't wrap their heads around, it makes him violently ill. This is another task he somehow manages to delegate to Mabel. It's their friendship bonding activity and oftentimes it's what they're doing when they're talking about boys or art projects or movies or Heidegger's reinterpretation of Nietzsche's nihilism or pop music or fashion. She braids cute beads into his hair without telling him. Mabel is the only thing keeping this tottering wreck of a pseudo-human intact and it's making the responsible adults nervous.

Like most other human hygiene rituals that do not actively serve to prevent live bacteria from entering his body, he thinks bathing/showering is annoying. He's been trained to do it anyway because if somebody goes "you stink, Bill, go take a shower" and he DOESN'T, then Stan and Ford will wait until he falls asleep, roll him up in a bedsheet, and drop him in a tub of ice cold water.

Of all a human body's annoyances, the worst is sleep. All the gunks that come with a human body mean nothing to Bill—ashes and dust, all of it—but sleep, God, sleep's psychological, sleep is where the horrors lie. He's a dream demon who's being punished; he spends all night aware that he's dreaming, but powerless to wake himself or exert control over his dreams. He's just stuck in his head, alone, bored, and hallucinating. It takes time for him to figure out how to unlock or adapt his dream powers so that he isn't so helpless inside his own head. 

[rottenpumpkin13]

Angeal, Sephiroth and Genesis all start growing wings and becoming monsters, essentially defecting together to make it Shinra’s problem.

Who/what do they take with them?

No one could say precisely when it started. Sephiroth would claim it was the moment he first saw a wing on Genesis' back, and Angeal would argue it was when Genesis told them both he was leaving. Genesis, naturally, would blame Sephiroth for existing too perfectly and throwing the balance of the universe into disarray.

Regardless, the point was that one day, SOLDIER's elite began sprouting wings, and instead of doing the sane thing—seeing a doctor, maybe asking Hojo and Hollander what the hell was happening (not that they ever would)—they looked at each other, had one (1) conversation, and decided to make it Shinra's problem.

So they left. Defected. Just like that.

Except they weren't stupid, they were going to do something useful.

SOLDIER had been suspicious for a long time. Some of them were tired, some of them were sick and didn't know why, and some of them had spent too many years watching good men die, fighting Wutai, monsters and Shinra's own unchecked ambition. So when Sephiroth, Angeal, and Genesis stood before them, living proof that whatever was in their veins was changing them into something else, they listened.

And they followed. Not all, obviously. Angeal pulled Zack aside and told him, firmly, to stay put. Zack argued, because of course he did, but Angeal wouldn't budge. Zack wasn't ready to burn bridges. Not yet. Not ever, if Angeal had his way.

And so, the lines were drawn. (Sephiroth, for the record, had one hard rule: No clones, no copies, no Hojo-esque bullshit. If they were going to fight, it was going to be real).

At first, Shinra underestimated them. A few dozen SOLDIER defectors, even with Sephiroth, Angeal, and Genesis leading them, couldn't possibly stand against an entire mega corporation, right? Right? Wrong.

Shinra sent out waves of fighters and Turks. They cut through them. Shinra tried to use the media against them. Genesis countered with unsettlingly well-articulated emails to his unwavering fanclub.

Shinra tried to hunt them down. Sephiroth started hunting back.

They moved fast, striking at supply lines, freeing factory workers, taking down the worst of Scarlet's machines. But degradation still loomed. Genesis and Angeal were feeling it creeping in—the inevitable decay of their bodies, the slow disintegration into something inhuman.

Then Sephiroth, in a moment of absolutely reckless self-sacrifice (or devotion, Sephiroth would later argue), offered up his own cells. Unlike Hollander's garbage, they worked. No more degradation. No slow, agonizing descent into nothingness.

For the first time in a while, Genesis and Angeal were whole again. And so, freed from death's shadow, they settled down. Not permanently. Shinra was still trying to kill them, but they found a house. A quiet, tucked-away place in the country where they could breathe. The war wasn't over, but they could take breaks.

Until Zack showed up, SOLDIER First Class and all, to fight Shinra's battles.

Zack: You traitors won't get away with this! How could you abandon SOLDIER and everything we fight for!? Where's your honor? I'd never betray SOLDIER like this! You guys are evil!

*AGS are in the kitchen, cooking dinner, completely unfazed*

Angeal, wearing an apron: Yeah, yeah. Are you staying for dinner? I'm making extra lasagna, and for dessert, Genesis made apple pie.

Genesis: I'd love to hear more about your girlfriend, Aerith. Let me go grab some wine.

Sephiroth: If you want, you can help me set up this telescope so we can look at the stars after dinner.

Zack: Fuck SOLDIER, Fuck Shinra, Fuck President Shinra, fuck Rufus Shinra, fuck Heidegger, fuck Palmer, fuck Hojo, fuck the coffee machine in the breakroom that never works right, I quit. Pass me a plate.

[nightguide]

OBERLIN NEURO-PSYCHOTHERAPY AND PROFESSIONAL PI

VOGUE ISSUES OCCURING:

MAY 2004

NOVEMBER 1996

JULY 2017

ROGUE ISSUE:

GRAZIA FEBRUARY 2023

exorcism involvement: PI

Q: ARE SOULS IMMORTAL?

ANSWERS: LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY GENTLEMEN

DAMNATION:

MAIMONIDES: (God has no attributes) - 'No, i don't think i can think of a way to betray anything but a cost of that thought, move on'

KIERKEGAARD: (anxiety is the dizziness of freedom) - 'i am a little aroused at the thought of that feeling, like as if you never had sex, though (smiles) sex is through anything, *smiles*'

ANSELM: (just by thinking about God we can know he exists) - 'i can ask the same, (i'm sorry, my dear). that i have *shies*, in any intuition that i may be to offer that solemn advice that he *shifts at the back by intuition sabotage*, that is why i never chose to eat, sleep or choose faith for that wonder *fantasy over a woman*, like she can be anything, my lord *orgasms*, this is not my intention (look up 'bleeding' to see where the intuitive yonder ends)'

SOCRATES: (the life which is unexamined is not worth living) - 'this is how *laughs to hard*, that i refuse to see the witch who *laughs* ended the world with an orgasm is going to take refuge in a 25 year old body to 'make it up' to her forlorn husband, and he's right, no solemn witchcraft, *laughs raucously*'

EDMUND BURKE: (society is indeed a contract) - 'this is so *bleep* up. this is not even *goes into gen-z lingo*, like get a job, Natalie (blurred name)'

HEIDEGGER: (we are ourselves the entities to be analysed) - 'this is a great day to make sense even harder (laughs with the theosopher on the right), nah. cool story brah'

RICHARD RORTY: (there is nothing deep down inside us except what we have put there ourselves) - 'kinder emotions have a dream, those who beg. stay that way, next.'

ARENDT: (the banality of evil) - 'dis. bitch.'

JESPERS: (only as an individual can man become a philosopher) - 'i cannot even (long story). tell you how am i supposed to breathe within the masses of a hundred men and one woman fantasy, like i would let my wife do that if an uncanny moment with a young student gone to hell for dreaming, is the last of us. working in YOUR PLACE, CAN FIGHT YOUR WONDER. THERE IS NO PIGS CAN TRY AND MAKE YOU THAT YOU ARE HER, IN ANY SINGLE WAY THAT YOU WILL REPLICATE HER BREASTS THAT YOU STOLE, YOU ARE NO 'hoor' UL AI'NTTT. THAT YOU THINK YOU ARE, UNDERNEATH MY HANDS AND I WILL TRY AND KILL ALL OF YOU *points of loeg* TO IMMERSE IMMORTALITY IN THAT WOMAN THAT I WILL CHOOSE TO WED TO FORELOCK HER LIPS IN MY JUSTICE *goes rogue (the first man to be known as Rogue on DW)'

[sometimesrufus]

❤: Which character do you think is the most egregiously mischaracterized by the fandom? 🖤: Which character is not as morally good as everyone else seems to think?

❤: Which character do you think is the most egregiously mischaracterized by the fandom?

I think there are two reasons I see really canon-mischaracterized characters, and they're both kind of the same reason in the end.

The work was written before any of the additional content giving characters more story came out.

The author never engaged with the additional content.

And, okay; before I answer this--know that if you write this character, I 100% respect your take. I rp with people whose characterizations I enjoy, and enjoyment doesn't always correlate with imo-canon-accurate, though more often than not it does.

Elena.

I was going to say Reno. I've seen a lot of Renos that are all brutality and little heart. And you know who fits that better but I pretty much never see depicted that way? Elena.

Elena is more of a brat than Rufus and Reno combined. Elena is the most loose canon brutal of them all. If you don't believe me, read The Kids Are Alright. She's ruthless in a way that lacks the control of the others. I see a lot of interpretations where she is very doe-eyed, but I think she's actually more in line with a lot of the more psychotic depictions I've seen of Reno than Reno is. She may be a newbie, but she's out for blood in order to prove herself. The others know the line between far enough and too far. She hasn't developed that, plus she seems to like taking her frustrations out on people in a way the others have grown tired of.

Again, to emphasize, I don't dislike doe-eyed Elena or heartless Reno. I don't even necessarily see them as non-canon, depending on when in life they're being written and what universe, etc. But I do think writers are missing out on how absolutely batshit savage Elena can be. XD

🖤: Which character is not as morally good as everyone else seems to think?

Now now, this depends on how we define morals, doesn't it? (Oh no, I think Rufus has infected me. That sounds too much like how he would answer that XD) But also, truly, how moral a character is depends on the moral being evaluated, so take this one with a grain of salt.

Oo, this might be a spicy take, but Reeve.

Reeve has a heart of gold, and he obviously isn't happy with how the other Shinra execs are running things, but he's also sat by for a lot of years while the evil company did evil things, and presumably did nothing. Reeve obviously has morals, but it's not until after the temple of the ancients that he really acts on them. Imo, you can only claim so much moral good when you stick your head down and let the shady mego-corp steamroll you. Not that I blame him! He's one guy in a dangerous position. But he acts as an enabler just as much as Scarlet or Heidegger for a long time.

But that's what makes all the characters in FF7 so incredible, imo. None of them are 2-Dimensional. The "good" guys have killed innocent people. The "bad" guys try to stop Sephiroth, too. Nothing and no one are clear-cut evil, except Hojo. Fuck Hojo--he's the reason for everyone's suffering.

[altocat]

What do you think Shinra's long term plan for Sephiroth was? Especially after Lazard left and the Wutai War was over? He obviously was their main weapon and posterboy and everything, but how long do you think he could have kept it up?

I was replaying CCR the other day and I get the general impression they were going to restructure SOLDIER eventually. and with Genesis a traitor and Angeal dead, the whole fanclub scene was kind of dead except for Sephiroth.

Ooh, very interesting.

There were always a variety of planned options with Sephiroth. The more immediate goal, now that the Wutai War has ended and the Genesis war was winding down, was to finally breed him out. A new generation of little Sephiroths they could use as their personal army. This, naturally, would have been done with or without Sephiroth's consent. He would be expected to perform regardless of his desires. And while he was able to evade such decisions before, now they're razor focused on the task.

There was also a very small chance that Sephiroth could have one day joined the board as an official member. But this would have been VERY dangerous and rather unlikely. The Shinra execs aren't dumb. Sephiroth doesn't share their ideals and his popularity with the public could have very well given way to a power shift, especially if he were to challenge President Shinra himself. Of course, Sephiroth isn't really interested in such a position, nor does he have any intention to take control. He's never liked Midgar. He doesn't want to rule it. Or have to deal with assholes like Scarlet or Heidegger all day.

There was the option of letting Sephiroth peacefully "retire", though with the understanding that he's still expected to show up for certain public speaking or propaganda focused events, always monitored. Sephiroth wouldn't have followed through with this, of course. He would have intimidated his way to freedom, leaving for better places. This would have been the most preferable outcome, as Shinra likely wouldn't have been able to stop him.

And there was, lastly, a contingency plan in place should Sephiroth become too dangerous, rebellious, or useless to their cause--a crippling injury, for example, or if the public were to suddenly turn on him and there was no hope of using him for future recruitment and propaganda. Following a successful breeding session, he was to be effectively euthanized, with his body donated for future dissection. Hojo would have been given the responsibility of performing the act, though it's debatable if he would have gone through with this.

It's because of this final option that Hojo did not speak up when they assigned Sephiroth to Nibelheim. Hojo is certain that something terrible will happen, but the results are much more interesting than having to kill his son in the long term. At least at Nibelheim, he will have the chance to engage in a new, exciting experiment. And should Sephiroth not survive it...well, he won't be there to perform or witness it. That's easier, almost. Or so he tells himself.