#you want me to go days without sleep I guess.

[austinbutlerslovers]

The Red Dress

Label Mature 18+

Summary You are acting as Austin’s romantic female lead in his latest film, however there’s just one problem…-he isn’t acting and he wants to make the relationship a reality.

❤️‍🔥Passionate Smut❤️‍🔥 Shy Austin • teasing •flirting • unwanted advances •romance denial • Austin simping + slight stalking • sleeping with a costar • BJ• cum eating •dirty talk • nipple play • fingering • orgasms • protection

🔗 Master List

📖 Proodreader @purejasmine

The Red Dress

For weeks, you and Austin had shared long days and late nights on set, working through scenes and running lines. You were the love interest in his latest film, and from the first day, it was clear he had a crush on you. 

It was in the way he lingered when he spoke to you, his eyes lighting up whenever you entered a room, the subtle touches on your arm as he spoke to you that felt like his way of claiming just a little more each time. 

But he wasn’t your type. Austin was used to bubbly, adoring girls who hung on his every word. You were professional, confident, and had little patience for playing into his charms.

Every advance he made, you played off with a practiced ease, the kind that kept him guessing—and somehow that made him want you even more.

Tonight is no different as you stand before the bulb-lit mirror, carefully slipping into the red dress for the next scene. You and Austin are set to film your first kiss, and you’re well aware of just how eager he is to perform, even if it’s only in character.

So when you hear a faint knock on your trailer door, you already know exactly who it is.

Smiling slightly, you call out, “Come in,” and sure enough, Austin steps inside, his eyes fixated on his script until he glances up, his gaze landing on you just as you are pulling the red dress over your hips.

You are curvaceous in all the right places and the fullness of your chest subtly bounces in your bra as you adjust the straps.

For a moment, Austin is stunned, his eyes widening as he takes in the way the fabric hugs your every curves, framing your body in a way that leaves little to the imagination.

His gaze lingers, more than what is modest, trailing over you with an intensity that makes the room feel suddenly warmer. 

You can see the struggle in his expression as he forces himself to look back down, pretending to be fascinated by his script once again.

“Is there something you needed, Austin?” you ask your voice light, with a subtle hint of amusement.

He clears his throat, gripping the edges of his script. “Uh, yeah…I just wanted to, um, run the scene with you before we—perform.” His voice is slightly breathless, betraying just how affected he is by the sight of you.

You give him a slight, teasing smile, peeking over your shoulder, as you reach behind your back. “Well then, before we start… could you zip me up?,” you ask, holding his gaze, watching the way his expression shifts from surprise to the arousal he can barely contain.

He steps forward placing his script on the vanity table, his hand moving to your zipper. His fingers brush over your skin, warm and slightly shaky, then you feel him pull the zipper all the way up, his hand lingering before he lets go.

His eyes meet yours in the mirror, and for a moment, it looks as if he’s about to say something—something unguarded, something real. But he holds back, his lips parting just slightly before he catches himself.

You turn to face him, leaning casually against the vanity, taking in the sight of him. 

Dressed for the scene, he looks extremely handsome. His cheeks are tinged pink, his eyes eager yet uncertain and there’s hint of a desperation there that he’s trying to hide, but it only makes him more endearing. 

Without a word, you reach over and take his script from the vanity, slipping easily into character, your gaze lingering on him as you step closer, letting your fingers trail along the edge of his sleeve.

“I just… I can’t stop thinking about what could’ve happened,” you say in character your voice filled with longing “If you weren’t there…” you say trailing your hand on his arm.

Austin’s eyes widen, caught up in the moment, but then he blinks, his mouth opening and closing. He’s forgotten his line—a rarity that makes you giggle, breaking character with a sparkle of amusement.

“What’s so funny?” he asks, his expression softening with a flicker of self-doubt, a small falter in his pride that you find unexpectedly charming.

With a smile you lean in, placing your hand on his chest as you read from the script. “It’s —‘l’ll always be there for you’”

The line brings an intensity to his eyes as his expression shifts. He straightens, his jaw set as he steps forward, closing the distance between you in a way that’s far more direct than you anticipated. 

“I’ll always be there for you,” he says softly and his hand slides to your waist, pulling you in. 

He kisses you deeply, the kind of kiss that leaves you breathless, lingering in a shared space as he finally pulls back, just inches from your lips.

“How was that?” he asks, his voice soft, his eyes searching yours, his face so close you can feel his breath.

Your lips are still parted, your hand resting lightly against his chest, caught somewhere between surprise and a flustered blush.

As he leans in to kiss you again, you press your hand firmly against him with just enough pressure to make him look down, keeping him at bay.  

“Save it for the scene,” you whisper, and quickly step past him, feeling his gaze trailing after you as you make your way to set.

There’s a quiet energy as you arrive to film the scene, the usual routine already in motion. The director stands near the monitor, giving instructions to the crew as the camera sits ready on its track.

Austin takes a deep breath and stands on his marker as dozens of people move around him. He clears his throat as he glances at the bright lights overhead, the camera crew adjusting their angles, as the sound guy holds a boom mic steady over your heads.

Make up artists dart between you both, brushing up his hair and touching up your lipstick with quick, practiced strokes. 

It’s all the routine organized chaos of a film.

The space grows quiet as final checks are made. “Quiet on set!” someone calls, and the director nods, signaling the start. 

The slate claps and when the director finally yells, “Action!” everything falls silent.

You and Austin both deliver your lines with a practiced ease, the moment building, tension mounting until it’s time for the kiss. 

“I just can’t stop thinking about what could’ve happened,” you say, your voice filled with desperation as your fingers trail lightly along his wrist. “If you weren’t there for me…” you say with unmistakable conviction.

The air grows heavy, and the crew seems to hold their collective breath, waiting as everyone looks to Austin, the pause stretching, the anticipation undeniable. 

For a moment, you almost think he won’t say it, the weight of the scene bearing down on him. 

 Then, his voice breaks through, soft and unsteady, but filled with something real. “I’ll always be there for you.” He says, his delivery is so quiet, so tender, that you’re not even sure of the mic catches it. 

But his focus is entirely on you, his gaze locked on yours as the words linger in the space between you. 

Then his lips find yours with a kiss that’s entirely more than what was rehearsed. He’s passionate and intense, his lips brushing against yours as if you’re the only thing that matters to him.

Your resolve slips as the moment consumes you, his kiss is breathtaking, overwhelming in a way that you weren’t expecting.

Your hands move instinctively, finding his face, your fingertips brushing along the sharp line of his jaw as he pulls you flush against him.

Austin is hard—the thought stuns you, his cock pressing against you  unrestrained as he pours everything into his kiss as though words would never be enough. 

The sound of the set fades away, the weight of his presence anchoring you in a moment that feels far too real.

“Cut!” the director yells, but Austin doesn’t stop, his lips linger, his hands holding you as though he can’t pull away. It isn’t until you gently press against his chest that he finally lets go, his breaths ragged as whispers from the crew spread through the set.

But Austin doesn’t seem to care. His gaze stays on you, his lips slightly parted, looking as though he’s ready to dive back in. 

The director reviews the footage, studying the monitor with a critical eye as you both wait, tension still hanging between you.

Then the director leans back and smiles. “We got it,”and the crew erupts into applause.

The kiss scene is the final shot of the day, and after the applause fades, you’re quickly ushered away from Austin back to your trailer to remove your dress. 

Once back in your own clothing  you are guided to your car by a staff member and driven back to the hotel where the rest of the cast is staying. 

The drive is quiet, but your thoughts are entirely on the intensity of the scene still replaying in your mind

The realization creeps in, unhidden and  undeniable—Austin was hard. The thought replays again and again, and your pulse quickens as you shift in your seat, your gaze flicking toward the dark window, trying to push it aside.

But you can’t. It’s not just the physicality of it—it’s what it meant, the way he seemed completely lost in the moment, as if the line between acting and reality had vanished entirely. You realize that for Austin, it wasn’t just a scene he wants the real thing.

You arrive back to the hotel at the same time as the rest of the cast, their lively chatter filling the lobby. But the moment your eyes meet Austin’s, everything else fades. His gaze locks on you and his need is clearly written across his face.

Without a word, you turn and head toward the elevator. You can feel his eyes following your every move, the tension between you hanging in the air, as though the decision has already been made.

He doesn’t follow you in, and for a moment, you think  he will let the tension simmer between you. But as you walk in silence down the hallway toward your room, you hear the elevator chime behind you.

Glancing over your shoulder, you see it’s Austin, though somehow, you already knew. The unspoken tension between you building until neither of you can ignore it.

As much as you try to resist, to keep your composure, the heat in his eyes makes it impossible to deny the way your body responds, the way your resolve begins to waver.

When you reach your door, you pull out your keycard, wondering if he will head to his own room.

But he doesn’t.

Instead, he hesitates, standing just behind you.

You glance at him over your shoulder, noticing the way his jaw tightens as if he’s trying to summon the courage to speak. 

For a moment, you think he might say something, but when the words don’t come, you grin, beeping your key card and entering your room as the door begins to close behind you.

Before it can, his hand shoots out, stopping the door in its tracks and he follows you inside. Before  you can say a word, he pins you against the entry wall, the soft click of the door closing echoing through the room.

He’s panting now, his chest heaving as he presses against you, his hands firm on your wrists. 

His grip tightens slightly, his gaze flickering as if he’s searching for the right thing to say. “I…don’t ” he starts, his voice rough, barely above a whisper as he regains control . “I don’t know why we do this to each other” he breathes his voice low and rough, the words carrying all the restraint he’s clearly been holding back.

“Do what?” you tease, leaning your head slightly, your eyes locked onto his, unwavering and steady as you silently dare him to make a move.

His breath stutters, but then his resolve seems to harden as he looks at you. 

“This,” he says, his closing the distance in an instant his lips crashing against yours in a kiss that’s filled with his frustration and need.

The intensity of his kiss pulls you in, igniting something you tried to ignore. Slowly, your lips begin to move with his, matching his urgency, the heat between you building with every second. 

His hands release your wrists, sliding down to your waist, his fingers digging into your hips as he pulls you close and he’s hard all over again.

His touch is firm, roaming over every curve of your body like he’s trying to memorize every detail, as if this might be his only chance to have you like this.

He pulls back from the kiss, his breath ragged as his eyes drop, taking in the sight of you. His hands move up, cupping your full chest, his thumbs brushing your nipples through the fabric. “ fuck “ he pants his brows knitting. 

“You want me, that much Austin?” you tease, your hands sliding down the length of his hard cock and the way he his hips jerk from surprise, makes you laugh softly, a low, knowing sound that only fuels his eagerness.

“Yes,”he breathes, his voice tight with barely restrained need and your eyes trail downward, catching sight of his impressive size straining hard and ready against his pants.

“It’s so big Austin,” you praise your tone filled with amusement as your fingertips brush along the shaft, making him harder.

“I’m sure you must get your way all the time,” you grin, teasing him as your fingers trail lower, pressing your palm against him, feeling the weight of his cock in your hand.

“But not this time,” you say intrigued, your tone turning darker as his breath stutters, his body tensing beneath your touch. His hips shift slightly seeking more as if he can’t stop himself, then his eyes look up to yours when you don’t give him what he wants—and it only fuels your resolve.

“I want to make you beg for it,” you decide, your tone firm as your finger tip traces a slow delicate circle on his cock head.

His Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows, and the wide desperate look in his eyes tells you everything you need to know. 

“Okay” he readily nods and at this point you know he would agree to just about anything.

You take your time, bringing your hands up and unbuttoning his shirt with excruciating slowness, each button revealing another inch of his perfectly toned body. 

Your fingertips graze his skin as the fabric parts, sending shivers down his spine, until the shirt finally falls to the floor, leaving him exposed, eagerly awaiting your next move.

He’s already a mess, practically shaking, his eyes glued to you with a desperate kind of worship. “Please,” he whispers, his voice barely a rasp, and you grin, savoring his need.

“Begging already, Austin?” you tease, your tone laced with heat. “I haven’t even started with you yet.”you reveal as you undress slowly, letting the fabric of your dress slip away to reveal your silhouette. 

Your curves flow effortlessly, your full, breasts mesmerizing him as he admires every inch of you of your body as if he’s witnessing something rare, something he’s always wanted but thought he could never have.

“You’re going to ruin me,” he says under his breath, his voice low and uneven as he takes in the sight of you. 

Your lips quirk into a smile as you answer,“ I know” laced with desire.

His hands slide around your waist, his fingers digging into your hips as he pulls you closer. 

His lips crashing against yours again in a passionate kiss, his hands roaming every curve of your body as if he’s trying to memorize each detail, every inch of you imprinted in his mind.

His hands squeeze your breasts with an intensity that draws a soft gasp from your lips, and you pull back slightly, meeting his gaze. The wild anticipation in his eyes is unmistakable, but you slyly smile not ready to give him exactly what he wants yet.

“How badly do you want me, Austin?” you ask, your voice soft and teasing as your fingers slip through his hair, tugging  him down gently to your breasts. The movement draws a shudder from him as his lips brush over them in reverence.

“More than anything,” he whispers against your skin, his voice trembling, with desperation and need as he begins to suck your nipple into his mouth.

You smile softly, your fingers gently pulling his hair back to make him look you in the his eyes. “Then let me give you everything,” you say, your voice heavy with promise.

His body tenses, every muscle in his abs drawn tight as you slowly lower yourself before him. He presses his palms against the wall for balance barely able to contain himself as he watches you settle on your knees. 

Slowly, your fingers move to his zipper, drawing it down with a deliberate slowness that heightens his anticipation. When you pull him out every inch of his thick cock is throbbing with an undeniable need. 

You look up at him and smile as you finally to take his cock into your mouth and his lips part as a symphony of raw, unrestrained sounds spill from him. 

With his his eyes locked you, his body trembles, his hips barely able to hold still as you suck him with a skilled, taunting rhythm, dragging him to the edge and pulling back, drawing out his pleasure until he’s whimpering, panting, his voice barely more than a plea as he tries to beg.

His moans are desperate, but you keep sucking him until he’s trembling, twitching, writhing, pleading, “Please let me fuck you,” he begs breathlessly, his voice breaking with need, and you finally relent.

You pull back just enough to meet his eyes, the heat between you undeniable. Before you can say anything, his voice breaks through, raw and unsteady.

“Don’t move.” He says as he kneels and retrieves a condom from his pocket. You grin seeing he’s prepared, revealing his true intentions all along. You watch as he rolls  the condom on his heavy cock with steady hands. 

Without hesitation, he pulls you toward him, his need undeniable as he leads you to the center of the room and pushes you down onto the softness of the bed.

You laugh at how eager he is as you prop yourself up on your elbows and as you meet his gaze the heat in his eyes is unmistakable.

“Come Austin,” you tease, your voice inviting as you pat the bed. 

He doesn’t hesitate as he climbs on top of you, his weight dipping the mattress as his hands find your hips, pinning you beneath him, his gaze locking on yours for just a moment before he lowers himself.

His mouth finds your breasts with an almost desperate hunger, his lips brushing against your skin before his wet tongue flicks over the sensitive peaks, sending jolts of pleasure through you as your fingers thread through his hair keeping him close. “You’re doing so good, Austin. Just like that.” You encourage him.

Your words spur him on as he squeezes them in his hands, his warm breath ghosting over your skin in between each kiss and lick, his attention entirely focused on you. As he sucks your nipple into his mouth, the heat and pressure draw a soft gasp from your lips, the sensation shooting straight through you.

The intensity of his focus, as he lavishes you without hesitation leaves you aching and breathless, his mouth moves hungrily over each breast, his tongue flicking and swirling over your sensitive peaks, as your nails lightly graze his shoulders.

He pauses just long enough to let his breath skim your nipple before he takes it into his mouth again, harder this time, sending a shudder down your spine.

The wet, obscene sound of his lips and tongue against your skin only heightens your need, each suck drawing soft gasps and moans from you. “You’re making me feel so good, Austin,” you say, your voice trembling slightly.

He groans against your skin, his mouth never leaving your breast as his hand moves lower, slipping between your thighs finding your clit, already swollen and slick from arousal. 

He firmly presses it before his fingers slide into you effortlessly the obscene squelch of his quick thrusts makes your cheeks flush as your body arches into him. 

“You’re so wet for me,” he says against your breast, his voice rough and heavy with desire, the words vibrating against your sensitive skin. 

“I want more… Austin don’t stop” you whisper, your tone breathy and encouraging.

Without hesitation, he pulls your tender nipple back into his mouth, his tongue swirling and flicking as he sucks harder.

His fingers curl inside you with precision, as your moans spill out uncontrollably, blending with the wet, rhythmic sounds of his mouth and relentless pace of his fingers inside you.

Your thighs shudder as your body coils tight, every muscle trembling under the relentless build-up—the slick noise of his fingers plunging into you, the wet pull of his lips on your nipples and the unbearable tension in your core finally snaps.

Your orgasm rips through you, as your hands clutch at his shoulders, desperate for something to hold on to as the waves of pleasure crash over you.

As he finally releases you his touch softens, his fingers easing out of you while his mouth lingers for a moment longer, pressing gentle kisses against your heated skin. 

He positions himself to enter you, his tip pushing in as he murmurs things that are almost incoherent, broken phrases laced with desire and disbelief as he glides his cock into you and begins to thrust.

“You feel so… you feel too good,” he gasps as his hands roam over your body like he can’t decide where to touch first, wanting to claim every inch of you.

“Don’t hold back,” you pant softly, your voice trembling with need. “I want all of you, Austin.”

Your gentle praises seem to unravel him as his hips begin moving in a desperate rhythm, each thrust more intense than the last, his body tight with the effort.

“That’s perfect,” you whisper, your fingers tracing over his shoulders, your voice laced with sweetness. “Just like that Austin … don’t stop.”

He groans, his voice rough and almost incoherent as he loses himself completely. “You—oh, fuck—how do you feel this good? I can’t… I can’t stop.” 

His words tumble out, disconnected and wild, as his body grinds against yours, his grip tightening like he’s afraid to let go. 

“You’re driving me crazy—” he groans, his voice raw and trembling with need.

You grab his jaw firmly, forcing him to meet your gaze, your eyes blazing with equal intensity. “Then lose your mind for me,” you pant, your voice light and commanding. “Show me how badly you want me.”

His hands grip your shoulders, anchoring himself as the tension within him surges to a breaking point. He thrusts into you with force as your tits jiggle, the rhythm of his movements so consuming it feels like the air is being knocked out of you.

Your wrap your legs around his hips in a desperate attempt to ground yourself, but it’s futile. Every thrust pushes you closer to the edge as his hands tighten their grip, his ragged breaths hot against your skin as your name spills from his lips. 

“Come for me,” he begs, his voice low and rough reverberating through you like a command your body can’t ignore. The tension peaks all at once, your orgasm crashing over you in waves so powerful it leaves you crying out, your nails digging into his shoulders as your body spasms beneath him.

He doesn’t slow, riding out every tremor, his hands sliding down to your waist, holding you steady as he pulls you to him again and again, prolonging the moment until you’re left utterly spent, gasping for air,trembling in his grasp.

His entire frame tightens, every muscle unyielding as a low, guttural sound escapes him, raw and unrestrained, and he surrenders to the overwhelming release.

A look of relief and ecstasy washes over his face as he comes, his expression almost vulnerable as he rides out the final waves of pleasure.

His breaths are still shuddering as he slowly pulls out and collapses beside you, his chest heaving as he stares at the ceiling. 

He looks stunned, as if he still can’t believe what just happened. His lips part slightly, but no words come out, his expression a mix of disbelief and something softer—almost awe

Finally he turns his head toward you, his breath still uneven, his voice heavy with exhaustion. “Do you want to go with me to dinner?” he asks, his question startling in its simplicity after what just happened.

You can’t help but laugh as you sit up understanding he wants to date you and brush his hair back with a teasing smirk.

“Dinner?” you ask, sitting up and leaving him sprawled out in bed. “You haven’t even begun to figure me out yet.” you grin.

He watches you saunter toward the bathroom, his eyes trailing your every move. You pause at the doorway, glancing back over your shoulder. “Come along, Austin,” you say, your voice soft and inviting, “Let’s see if you can handle me again.”

His hesitation lasts only a second before he scrambles off the bed, his movements hurried and desperate as he follows you without a second thought.

🥀END

🔗 Masterlist

🏷️ Always Tag Me List

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[soldearestsoulmate]

Sol literally already SA'ed MC in the old build it just wasn't as "extreme" or whatever ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Using someone's hand to get off while they're asleep is SA because well. You didn't exactly consent to doing that yea? I really wish we had more extreme depictions of yans because. Well. You wouldn't realistically want a yan after you irl and people woobify the yandere archetype too much without considering just how fucked up and mentally ill a person has to be to be like that

People who are saying this is ooc just haven't been paying attention plainly and haven't put thought into Sol as a character and what lengths he would go to

(Excuse me dumping my thoughts my interest in this game returned with the new update and I like talking </3)

@rite-of-defilement

SPOILERS WARNING

Warning for mention of sexual assault.

Exactly. Guess people were fine with it as long as it was easy to ignore. But now that it's more clear as day, people are acting like it's the end of the world, and want it erased all together now.

I swear this might be a case of them loving a fanon or their own version of Sol more than how he really is canonly now.

And yeah, you don't want a real yandere after you irl. It's not cute like fiction, its real scary serious stuff. Which is why we safely explore and play with it in fiction, you know, in a fictional world and playground. Where we can have fun with it, and not get hurt or put ourselves in real danger compared to irl.

Agreed, I already knew from the beginning Sol was a fucked up little(tol) guy. The sleeping pills and breaking into your home to steal your stuff alone was enough signs. And even in the sfw version, the implications of what was happening or gonna happen. I felt were pretty clear...

One doesn't just drug someone else for just "innocent cuddles time". Some fucked up shit was going on there, just the screen went to black to let your dark imagination fill in the rest.

(It's no problem! I am in the same boat too pretty much. lmao)

[whtepony]

hi!! i love ur work !

so random request but i was wondering if you could write how denki or sero would comfort you if you were clearly going through something, like distancing , sleeping all day, being overly quiet, the whole thing. ive been going through alot lately and it would be greatly appreciated if you could! completely understand if not!!

✮ that funny feeling

ft. denki kaminari x gn reader

warnings: depressive themes

notes: anon i’m so sorry it’s taken me forever to get to this 😭 i hope you’re doing better!!! also yeah bo burnham title bc i cannot EVER title things ugh (divider from @cafekitsune)

denki kaminari is observant when he wants to be, meaning that he notices almost immediately when you start to distance yourself. at first, he kind of assumes he’s done something to hurt your feelings. it starts with cancelling your plans once, then twice - taking hours to respond to his texts, then avoiding them all together. choosing to eat dinner alone in your dorm instead of with him. when you skip class for the third day in a row without so much as a “hey, won’t be there today” text, he thinks he’s really fucked up. how could he possibly fumble you this hard and have no clue how it happened?!

when he realizes no one has heard much of anything from you lately, denki resolves to find out what’s going on asap. he’s knocking on your door before he even considers that you might prefer a check-in over text, but you crack open the door anyway. if he’s shocked at your appearance he doesn’t show it - from the looks of you, that’s probably the last thing you need right now. he smiles big and his shoulders relax a bit seeing that you’re at least alive although in a brief panic, he definitely did worry about that for a second or two. “you mind if i come in?”

you sigh deeply and open the door wider for him, your face flushing in embarrassment as he steps inside and closes the door behind him. there are clothes strewn about the floor, papers and trash littering several surfaces, and probably a dozen empty water bottles on your nightstand. “i uh, just wanted to come check on you - i’ve been worried, y’know?” and you do know, and you feel awful about it, on top of everything else. you fiddle with the hem of your hoodie, sitting on the wrinkled edge of your bed. you nod, clearing your throat a bit before speaking. “i dunno,” you shrug, the bed dipping under his weight next to you, “guess i haven’t felt that good lately.”

denki tilts his head to the side, offering you a small smile. “really? you could’ve fooled me, you look incredible!” his voice is tender and you know there isn’t any underlying insult - he genuinely just wants to make you laugh. you do, although it’s more like a sharp exhale, but his smile grows wider at the small success. he gently pulls you to his chest, wrapping his arms around you securely. you sigh and busy your head into his chest, instantly feeling lighter than you had in weeks. “you want me to order us something to eat while you go have a shower?”

“…yeah, that sounds nice.”

[supercorpkid]

Would it really kill you if we kissed? Part 2

Supergirl. Baby Danvers. Kara Danvers x B!D!Reader, Alex Danvers x B!D!Reader, Lena Luthor x Reader, Esmé Danvers

Word Count: 3010

Previously on part 1. Part 2 of 3.

You start spending more time with Esmé, filling your days with her endless energy and her excitement over everything new on this island. You’d planned on being here for the family time anyway, but lately, it’s become easier to dodge Kara’s concerned glances and Lena’s quiet observations. Esmé, at least, never asks questions you’re not ready to answer.

It doesn’t stop Kara from trying, though. You find yourself slipping out of family dinners early, ducking behind palm trees when you spot her coming your way, feigning sleep when she knocks on your door at night. You know it’s getting obvious—Kara’s face fell when you bailed on last night’s dinner, and Alex’s knowing sigh was almost loud enough to break through the silence you’ve wrapped around yourself. But would they even understand if you told them?

Esmé’s simpler. When you’re with her, it’s just fun, silly games and laughter that doesn’t get weighed down by questions. For now, you let yourself hide behind that. That is until Esmé notices, of course. Kids always do, with that unfiltered clarity adults forget to keep.

It catches you by surprise when the two of you are building sandcastles, the sun heavy and warm, and she says, “I miss hanging out with Aunt Kara and Aunt Lena together. You know, like… like we used to.”

You tense, your hands pausing mid-sculpt. “They’re busy with grown-up stuff. It happens.”

Esmé gives you a look, so knowing it’s almost painful. “You’re a bad liar.”

You sigh, brushing sand from your fingers. “I guess I am.”

“Is it because of that thing you can't tell Aunt Kara, but you can tell my mom?”

It takes you by surprise, the perceptiveness of it, the way she’s pinpointed exactly what’s unraveling between you and your sisters without even understanding why. You swallow, forcing a smile that doesn’t reach your eyes. “Sort of.”

“I wish I had a sister. If I did, I'd tell her everything! And she would be my best friend!”

"Well, your mom is my best friend and she is my sister too."

She spares a look over her shoulder, to Kara on the other side of the beach swimming alone in the ocean. "I bet Aunt Kara feels lonely."

It’s… whoa. A lot more insightful than you'd expect from a six-year-old.

Kara’s attempts to reach you haven’t gone unnoticed. She’s patient, but only for so long, and it’s clear to everyone around you that you’re holding her at arm’s length.  But what's worse is that you avoid Alex too, because you don't wanna tell her what happened. She's gonna tell you that you missed your chance to come clean, which is obvious and yet extremely unhelpful. 

It’s so evident you're keeping your distance, that when Lena finds you sneaking behind a bush one evening, she doesn’t even act surprised.

"Hey!" Lena’s voice makes you jump, her warm presence somehow amplifying your guilt. "Why are you hiding behind a bush? And why does it feel like I haven't seen you in days?"

"What? It hasn't been days." It has. She raises her eyebrows, and you smooth your hands over your clothes. "I thought I saw a hedgehog," you lie, forcing a smile. She doesn’t look convinced. "What are you up to?"

"I thought you and I could go on a walk," she says, her smile soft, irresistible. You’re about to argue, but she throws a cheap shot. "You know, you did promise me some alone time."

"Did I?" You try a joke, but, as with the last few attempts, it doesn’t quite land with her.

"You don’t have to come if you're more interested in the hedgehog. I could probably hold my own against the wild animals in the forest."

"Yeah, I’m sure you can, but I’d hate to miss you fighting a snake, so I might as well tag along. Wouldn’t want to miss the show."

"Very kind of you, darling." Lena’s eyes light up with humor, and the two of you start toward the nearest forest trail. It’s close to the resort—too close for any real wildlife, which is probably the point.

The conversation is supposed to be casual, just friends catching up. She asks about your thesis, even a few things about your superhero life. But as relaxed as it should be, you can’t shake the tension simmering beneath the surface. Every laugh, every shared glance, every tiny silence, and you’re swallowing feelings, nearly choking on unsaid words. Your heartbeat drums in your ears, terrified that one slip-up could give everything away.

"Kara is so thrilled to have you to share these experiences with. I bet it’s lonely, having to figure out this superhero lifestyle on your own."

"I don’t think I’m helping that much, to be honest. I’m just… following her lead most of the time."

"I think you're more important than you give yourself credit for." Lena touches your arm, her eyes soft and unwavering, making it impossible to shrug it off. "For everyone, not just Kara."

“Oh, yeah. Sure.” You mutter the words with such disbelief that Lena almost flinches.

She doesn’t let it go, though. She stops, making you pause too, her expression puzzled but determined.

"Y/N, darling." Just one word—darling—and your heart is pounding, each beat a tiny betrayal. "You know I mean it, right? We wouldn’t miss hanging out with you so much if you weren’t—"

"So fun to have around!" you cut in, your voice unnaturally bright.

Lena reaches for your hand, her gaze softening in a way that makes it impossible to hide. "If you weren’t so incredibly special."

This is it—the moment you could be honest, vulnerable, bare open like she is. But Kara might be in love with her. And she’s probably in love with your sister too, because who would choose you over Kara? No one. Not even you.

So you bite your tongue, force a smile, and watch the moment slip past. “Yeah, I—I don’t know. Maybe the superhero life just isn’t for me.”

“Oh.” Lena blinks, visibly thrown, and when you realize what you’ve just said, it’s too late. Can’t take it back. You’ve tried so hard to hide how you feel about her, you didn’t even think about the other secrets you need to protect.

“Not that I’ll stop!” you rush to reassure her. “I’d never stop supering and leave Kara to it. I just… wonder, sometimes. But, um, everyone wonders about things they’ll never act on, right?”

You can feel Lena’s gaze linger on you as you stumble through your words. Her silence feels weighty, loaded with questions she doesn’t voice. Instead, she’s watching you with that careful, gentle look she has—the one that makes you feel like she can see straight through every defense you’re barely managing to hold up.

“Y/N,” Her voice is low, softer than usual, and you can tell she’s choosing her words carefully. “If you ever feel like talking… Really talking, I mean—I’ll listen, you know that, right?”

You breathe deep, trying to keep your expression neutral, but the way she’s looking is too much; she’s seeing right through you, and every instinct you have screams to deflect, to put distance between you and that sharp, all-seeing gaze.

“I know, Lena. I just—” You pause, forcing the words clawing up your throat back down, swallowing hard against the sting of tears that threaten to break free. “I don’t have much to say right now, but… thank you.”

Her fingers brush down your arm slowly, lingering for a split second before letting go. She doesn’t push, but there’s something in her eyes, something searching, that leaves you feeling bare. She’s not fooled, you know that. But she doesn’t press further, only offers a soft nod.

“I just want to make sure you know that you’re not alone.” Her voice is so gentle, it makes your throat tighten.

Her words land with a bittersweet ache, a reminder of exactly how not alone you actually are—and yet, how impossible it feels to share any of it. You swallow, nodding a little too quickly, desperate to end this before you give yourself away completely.

“I appreciate it,” you mumble, unable to meet her eyes. “Anyway, uh… we should head back before it gets dark.”

A tiny smile curves her lips, one filled with patience, and it only makes the weight in your chest feel heavier. She sees through you, sees the things you’re too afraid to say. And as you walk back, her presence beside you is both comforting and unbearable, the knowledge that she’d listen if you let her like a gentle but relentless pressure against the wall you’re so intent on keeping up.

When you finally reach the resort, you mumble something about needing to freshen up before dinner, ducking away before she can say anything else. But her words stay with you, lingering in the back of your mind: you’re not alone.

Even though you've never felt as lonely and isolated as you do now.

This trip, this whole thing, was a really bad idea.

You throw together your bag in a rush, moving faster than any human eye could see. This trip was supposed to be a break, a chance to breathe—but with each day, it feels like the land on this tiny island is getting even smaller. There’s nowhere left to hide, and the weight of your secrets presses harder, threatening to escape the moment you open your mouth. It almost did with Lena, so you desperately need to leave.

You knock lightly on Alex and Kelly’s door, hoping not to wake Esmé. It’s late, but Alex answers quickly, slipping out into the hall and shutting the door quietly behind her. She gives you a concerned once-over, her expression softening in that big-sister way.

“What’s wrong?” she whispers. “Lena said you two hung out before dinner, but then you didn’t show up—”

“I’m going back to National City.” You say it quickly, barely letting the words settle before you look away, as if that might make it easier. Alex’s eyes shift down to your bag, and she lets out a long, disappointed sigh.

“You can’t keep running forever, you know.”

“No, but I can tonight.” You set your jaw, bracing yourself. Alex is going to try to talk you out of this, and you can’t let her. “I’ll help keep watch over National City with J’onn and M’gann. Say goodbye to Esmé for me.”

“Absolutely not. You want to leave her, you tell her yourself.” She opens the door a fraction, enough for you to glimpse Esmé’s little sneakers by the bed, and you feel something twist painfully in your chest. She knows it’ll be harder for you to look Esmé in the eye, to break your promise of a trip full of fun with her favorite aunt. “Man up.”

“Sexist,” you mutter, half-heartedly, as you step inside. But before you can call for Esmé, you freeze. Kara is sitting on the floor, her gaze sharpening the moment she sees you.

“You’re leaving?” She stands up, arms crossed, and in that moment, she doesn’t look much like your sister—she looks every inch of Supergirl, unyielding. Kelly clears her throat, mumbling something about checking on Esmé before slipping out of the small living room.

“Yeah, I have this… thing.”

“Is this ‘thing’ called a massive crush on Lena that you’re too scared to deal with?” Kara’s voice is quiet but piercing, an eyebrow arching as she studies you, making you feel as transparent as glass. “Or is this ‘thing’ a problem you’ve got with me?”

You scoff, rolling your eyes. “Oh yeah, I forgot everything has to be about you.”

Before you can get another word out, she’s right in front of you, moving faster than even you expected.

“It’s becoming about me because you keep dodging me and shutting everyone out,” she says firmly. “You have to stop running, Y/N. Why won't you deal with your problems like an adult?”

“Oh my God! Is there a version of this conversation where you don’t sound like my mother?”

“I don't know. Is there a version where you don’t sound like a moody teenager?” She fires back, voice sharp as a blade.

"Go to hell, Kara," you mutter, your voice barely above a whisper, knowing full well she’ll catch every word. You try to push past her, but she steps in your way, resolute, daring you to challenge her. Fine. If she wants a fight, you’ll give her one.

“Stop acting so tough,” you say, each word sharp and unyielding. “You’re not Alura. You’re not Eliza. You’re not even my oldest sister.” You pause, just long enough to let it sink in, to make sure she feels the sting. "You don’t get to act like you’re in charge."

Kara flinches, just a fraction, but you catch it. And part of you hates that it hurts her—almost as much as the rest of you wants it to.

A hand catches your arm as you make to leave, and you know it’s Alex without even looking. Her grip isn’t harsh, but it’s inflexible, the quiet authority of someone who knows exactly what they’re doing.

“This has gone too far.” she says, her voice low.

“Alex,” you say, a warning lacing your tone. But your sister doesn’t budge. She’s as immovable as Kara in her own way, and you can tell from her stance that she’s done letting this slide.

“No. You tell her now, or I will.” The seriousness in her voice roots you to the spot, and you stare at her in disbelief. “Don’t test me, Y/N. This has gone on too long.”

“Alex,” you plead, the warning fading, replaced by something that feels like betrayal. “I trusted you.”

But Alex’s stance only hardens. She glances at Kara, crossing her arms in front of her chest, each movement deliberate, telling you in no uncertain terms that this is the line she won’t let you cross.

“You want to know what’s going on?” your voice comes out loud, it's almost a yell in the quiet of the night, voice cracking as you throw the question back at them, your fists clenched so tight they’re shaking. “Fine. Let’s do this. You want honesty? Here it is.”

Kara and Alex fall silent, but they’re staring, eyes wide. You can’t tell if they're surprised or concerned, and for once, you don’t care.

“I’m in love with Lena,” you spit out, practically choking on the words. “There it is. Happy? But it doesn’t matter, because she’s yours, Kara. Everyone is. Everyone who matters, everyone I could ever care about, they’re all yours.”

“I don't—” Kara starts, but you’re not finished. Not even close.

“Don’t!” you snap, cutting her off. “You have no idea what it’s like to be around you, day after day, having to act like it doesn’t kill me. Watching you looking at her like… Like I do. And I just—” Your voice wobbles, a tremor of frustration bubbling up with the tears you’re fighting to keep down. “I just get to stand there and smile and play the part of your perfect little sister, like I should just be grateful to even be a part of your story.”

Alex takes a step toward you, hands up, but you move away, barely holding it together, so you don't hurt her. “Do you know how exhausting it is? How much do I dread putting on the suit, being the hero, pretending this is all I ever wanted? Because it’s not. It’s never been. I hate it," your voice comes out so raw, your throat hurts afterwards. "and I can’t even tell anyone that because you’d all look at me like I’d failed you. Both of you would.”

Alex steps back the slightest, her face twisted in a mix of surprise and sadness. Kara looks stricken, her mouth parting like she wants to say something, but you don’t give her the chance. You’re too far gone, the anger pushing past your better judgment.

“You get to be perfect, and I get to be… what? The second-rate version of you? The one who’s not quite as brave, not quite as good?” You only realize you're crying when you taste your own tears. “The one people don't even glance at because they are too busy looking at you — the super girl. And now you want me to watch you with the person I love too? You just get to take everything.”

"That's not true! None of it is—" Kara reaches out, but you take a step back, hands up like it’s a shield. 

“You don't get it! So don’t—just don't.”

Her expression crumples, and for the first time, you see the real hurt reflected back at you. But the ache inside you is too loud, too sharp to ignore. A small part of you feels vindicated, glad that she’s hurting too—at least now you’re not the only one carrying the weight of pain.

You turn away, ready to escape the suffocating atmosphere, but Alex’s voice cuts through the tension, pulling you back.

"Y/N, wait." Alex tries, voice sweet like you didn't even know she could master. "Let's all take a breath and just… talk about it."

"Oh no," You turn to her. "you don't get to do this. I trusted you with this, and you just—” You can’t find the words, the tears breaking free, your voice shaking. "You just chose Kara over me. Like everyone does. So you don't get to ask me for anything." The next words leave from the depths of your core, it shakes the entire room. "NONE OF YOU get to ask me for ANYTHING!" 

Sometimes hours can feel like minutes, and sometimes a single second can last a lifetime.  "I'm done pretending we're one big happy family." This is it. This is that second. The second you burned every bridge, every connection you've had and flew away from it.

[laikinz]

last two days have been so.. umm a lot they’ve been a lot

[skyloftian-nutcase]

Outbreak Pt 3 (LU in Healthcare)

(Content warning, this is a plague fic, it will likely hit close to home, and there’s dark humor and character death in this part)

It started off as a whisper, but the whisper became a chatter, a groan, constant and disturbing and growing ever closer.

Cases were on the rise in the city, though the surrounding area seemed unaffected still, for now. City officials were growing concerned, and restrictions were starting to be enacted. People were asked to stay home, if possible. As for the hospital and squads…

Hyrule squinted at his email. "Wait. Didn't... didn't they say we could use alcohol wipes to clean the equipment?"

"Yeah," Mo called from the kitchenette in the station.

"Now it says we can only use bleach wipes."

Mo groaned. "Isn't that like the third policy change this week?"

"I'm still trying to figure out if we're doing a specific isolation truck or not anymore," Aurora mumbled. "Like we just had one truck dedicated to the high risk iso cases, and now we're getting so many calls for it that it's a moot point anyway."

"I think the last email said put plastic over everything for Arfy patients and then wipe everything down that you use," Mo replied.

"Wait, which email?"

Hyrule sighed. This was getting ridiculous. And he was getting just a little nervous. “When in doubt, just bleach everything, I guess.”

Aurora huffed. “Did you see the email about the respirators?”

“Which email?” Mo threw his hands in the air, exasperated. “I’ve got twenty new emails!”

“I suppose that means you’ll actually have to read them now,” Aurora noted with a snort.

“Do you all think it’ll get worse before it gets better?” Dawn asked, wringing her hands worriedly. “The OMD made it sound like that would be the case.”

“Our medical director knows more than I do,” Hyrule shrugged. “If he says it’s going to get worse—”

“No, he didn’t just say that, he said ‘it’s not a matter of if the wave hits us, but when,’” Aurora quoted, standing. “He scared the hell out of Dawn.”

“They’re pretty foreboding words,” Hyrule commented darkly, looking away. It was the main reason he was getting nervous. But he was also steeling himself. If they were in for a fight, he would face it head on.

“Okay, but what does any of this have to do with the email about the respirators?” Mo asked as he scrolled frantically through his email.

“Oh, we’re supposed to wear N95s now,” Aurora answered with a wave of her hand.

Hyrule blinked. “Wait. Aren’t—aren’t we supposed to get fit tested for those?”

“Oh, yeah,” Aurora nodded, rolling her eyes. “Here’s your official fit test: pick a mask that fits.”

“We’re all going to die, aren’t we?” Dawn questioned worriedly, hugging herself.

“Nobody’s died from Arfy yet, I don’t think,” Mo noted. “At least not here.”

“People have died,” Aurora corrected.

“Well, maybe we’ll die, then,” Mo amended.

Hyrule laughed while Aurora swatted his partner. Well… at least they’d die fighting. But he really hoped it wouldn’t get to that point.

While the rescue squads struggled to keep up with policies and slapped shoddy safety regulations into place, the hospital clamped down even further. Visitor policies had officially been revoked as of today, and it made all the providers somewhat uneasy.

In some aspects, it was helpful. In others, it made things that much harder.

Arfy patients were medical patients. Which meant the medical floor and ICU was quickly filling up while other parts of the hospital either maintained their quota or decreased as people stayed home. More and more, Four found himself floating to his friend’s ICU, and he felt fairly out of his depths about it. The one good thing was that he got to spend time with Dot. But as cases rose, so did the stress, the worry, and the heartache.

The ICU felt less like a unit where critically ill people got better and more like a place to go to die.

Four and Dot had the same patient assignment for four days in a row. It was the same assignment because nothing had changed with the patients. Intubated, sedated, paralyzed, some proned. The amount of sedation required to keep their patients under was far more than Four was used to, and it was insane how little it would take for their oxygen saturation to drop. Any semblance of activity in the body increased oxygen demand, and the instant oxygen demand increased, no amount of intervention from the ventilator seemed to help. ECMO was a word Four had hardly heard in his trauma ICU, but he heard it on a near daily basis now, being considered at rounds, being initiated with someone else’s patient.

Four was exhausted. His face was breaking out from wearing a respirator for twelve hours at a time. His feet and knees and hips hurt from standing in isolation rooms for three to four hours at a time trying to cluster all his care. And now, with the visitor restriction enacted…

Visitors were hit or miss, particularly in Four’s world. Trauma precipitated drama, and while family could be infinitely helpful and supportive, he’d also seen things go awry, had to deescalate fights or call security. In some aspects, he was thankful there were no visitors while all of this was happening; he was tired of having to explain that yes, you have to wear this gown and gloves and mask, no you can’t kiss your loved one while they’re intubated and sedated with a contagious disease… but still. He couldn’t imagine how hard it was on the family - the patients were sedated to the point that they shouldn’t be aware of anything, but the family had to agonize over the matter at home.

He didn’t like it. He understand the logic. But he didn’t like it.

And so here he sat, holding a patient’s hand while they withdrew care. Here he sat, being the only witness to someone’s last breaths while their family mourned from afar.

Four watched the heart rate steadily drop. He watched the oxygen saturation plummet. He muted the red alarms as the monitor screamed that his patient was dying, that something should be done, like an accusation and call to arms when Four knew this particular fight was over.

He wasn’t a particularly religious person, but he said a prayer for the patient and the family either way. He found himself praying a lot these days, honestly.

While the visitor policy took its toll inside the frame of work, the restrictions both inside and outside the hospital were causing further stress on everyone. Warriors had basically banned Wind from seeing him, opting to stay with Time and Malon instead, leaving the kid in the apartment. He brought food deliveries to the door, asked if Wind needed anything, but he always did so when Wind wasn’t awake - the teenager had swore up and down that if anybody got Arfy he’d take care of them, and Warriors was terrified of that promise as it was basically a threat. Time agreed that Wind didn’t need to get involved, much to the teenager’s chagrin, and Wind found himself already struggling from the loneliness and the frustration of trying to study for classes online when nobody knew what they were doing or how long this would last.

Meanwhile, Wild sat in his room, fingers aimlessly tracing over each other, the smell of bleach so fresh in his nose from scrubbing everything relentlessly for hours on end that he might as well have inhaled a bottle of it. His chest hurt. Not to mention that new disinfectant they were told to use made him cough a lot.

And he worried. Because… it had been a few days since he’d seen his father. Legend had given him updates through his sister (and made Wild swear not to tell anyone about her), and it had sounded like he was improving as expected. But now, he… the rest of the family…

It felt like a blessing and a curse. It was a guarantee that Wild couldn’t run into his mother or sister by accident, but it was also a situation that his mind screamed that he address.

He couldn’t just… he couldn’t just leave his father isolated and alone recovering in the hospital in the midst of an outbreak. He couldn’t.

But what if visiting him made things so much worse? What if it stressed his father’s recovering heart? What if it triggered more traumatic memories for Wild? He was terrified of getting anywhere near the man while he was awake, but his heart screamed that he go to him.

Wild refused to be a coward. And he refused to be heartless, despite how anxious this entire situation made him, despite how his mind screamed he keep away. So that night, when he got on to work, he took a delivery to the cardiovascular ICU and paused in front of a doorway, looking hopefully for a familiar nurse.

“Link? Wild?”

Jumping, Wild turned around to see the nurse in question, watching him scrutinously. She smiled (or at least, he assumed she did, based on how her eye crinkled above her mask) in recognition. “I thought it was you. You here to see your dad?”

Wild swallowed and nodded.

“Good, because the drama I’ve been trying to avoid has been driving me insane,” Legend’s sister said lightheartedly, but despite the casualness of her tone, the words sank into Wild’s stomach like a stone.

“Drama?” He questioned quietly.

“Nothing like… bad, I suppose, but still,” the nurse explained. “I’d be in there taking care of him and overhear him talking to his wife and he’d mention that he swore he saw you. I’m not entirely sure she’s convinced. She seems hopeful, though. But I figured it was best not to bring it up myself since I, ah, don’t know what’s going on.”

Wild felt his blood freeze. His father remembered? And he’d told his mother?

Great. This was… this was just great.

“Go see him,” Legend’s sister prompted gently. “I can tell he loves you very much and just wants to know you’re ok.”

Wild’s eyes unexpectedly burned with tears in an instant, and he was grateful he was wearing a mask to hide his expression. He nodded, hesitantly making his way towards the room.

It all seemed so normal, seeing his father sitting in a recliner looking at his phone. Wild wasn’t even entirely sure he’d recovered memories of his father like that, but somehow it seemed familiar. Abel hadn’t noticed him yet, engrossed in whatever he was looking at, brow slightly furrowed. That expression drew memories, a familiar scrutiny that he would often give Wild himself or his sister, a quiet concern and sternness that made Wild want to stiffen up and simultaneously run to him.

Damn it all, he’d missed him.

Wild swallowed his fears and stepped forward, hoping that this wouldn’t be a disaster. He knocked on the door, initially so quietly that his father didn’t hear him over the chatter of the news on the television. He knocked again.

His father looked up. Stared a moment. Went a shade paler.

Wild hastily stepped forward. “W-wait, don’t get worked up—”

His father stood, seeming mostly steady on his feet, and tried to walk to him, heedless of the cords and oxygen tubing attached, and Wild hastily met him part of the way before he ripped everything out of the wall. Abel immediately pulled him to his chest in the tightest hug Wild had ever felt, and…

And Link sank into the embrace, crying.

[moeblob]

You know, when I kept getting asked "so you didn't ever have severe pains before now?" in the hospital and I kept replying "I have a high pain tolerance" I meant it. However, there is only so much pain my tiny 4'9" body can hold... (aka I am sweating and in agony bc I'm getting told to use LESS severe pain meds so I don't rely on them too much and it is AWFUL)

[talkorsomething]

I have Got to get more transgender

[monster-every-day]

day 71 - 3/11/24 - candle construct

the lighting on this one is atrocious please don't look at this

anyways this design originally came to me as a concept for a regi. like from pokemon. a fire-type regi, it's a volatile ball of flame encased in sacred wax by ancient people. the reason its sacred wax is because you dont have to worry about it melting it regenerates. anyway it obviously wouldn't have looked like this.

[nomairuins]

its so embarassing likee. going to talk abt a feeling you have but you already know ppl will be like Oh that sounds like depression lol and its like. well yes . i know . trust me i am so aware i am depressed . but its still like a thing ive been thinking abt and wanting to talk abt but ik itll just be like Ok hun 👍. idk idk what response i would want tho ig FNFNFNF

[sail-not-drift]

.

[wolpatinga]

[dbphantom]

Hmmm lungs and throat pain. Don't like that.

[6mayhem]

but i would give anything for just one day spent in the life i had when i was 15. it may not have been perfect but i felt like i belonged somewhere. and i didn't worry so goddamn much about the big picture

[sensitivegoblin]

Vent

Tw: SH and su!c!de

[manebioniclegali]

Clearly people who say to just keep getting up at the same time each day aren't sleep deprived