#you think I'm gonna flat out tell them I'm 30 and don't have kids

[ladywaterfall]

give me your best tips for how to have an interesting answer for "tell me about yourself", cause I have a job interview tomorrow

[just-a-carrot]

another detail I think about is pre-reset Orlam having kids’ toys like teddy bears and train sets in his castle in Wonderland. The fact that he’s still very much trying to make up for his lack of a childhood and taking full advantage of the power he has now to give him things that he never had before, even if something as small and minuscule as children’s toys………..that DETAIL alone shows to me that Orlam was trying SO HARD to make up for what he lost and enjoy what he could not enjoy before as King Orlam, Ruler of Wonderland because he could not have these things as Orlam Brewbacher, 30-year-old Data Analyst from bumfuck nowhere Midwest, USA.

and tell me why that MINOR DETAIL got me SO EMOTIONAL when I first played it. Carrot holy shit do you realize how /human/ your characters feel? Whether you mean it or not, your characters are extremely multi-dimensional, even ones we don’t see often like Jerry and Cecil (not to the same extent as the other characters, but they certainly do not come off as Flat, Stagnant Characters) and I LOVE that everyone in this game is literally just The Worst People Ever. They have selfish desires, dreams, and FLAWS. SO MANY FLAWS. Do you know how REFRESHING it was to have MIXED OPINIONS on NEARLY ALL OF THE CHARACTERS (except Orlam I was his #1 defender but that’s bc I relate to him a ton and relate to his situation and trauma a LOT guys it’s okay the cannibalism was just a minor setback he’s really cool you guys and 100% did nothing wrong-)

I just. AUGH. AAAAAAAAAAUGH ‼️‼️‼️ I love while during the course of playing this game the first time I had Ever-Shifting Opinions Of These Characters And The Opinions I Had About Them At The Beginning Of The Game Molded Throughout Me Playing And We’re Completely Different By The End, Because Although Some Of Their Motivations For Doing The Terrible Things They Did Were Infuriating They Felt Real. Those Are Real Human Motivations. Those Are Real Human Issues. Those Are Real Human Emotions. Those Are Real Complicated, Messy, Ugly Human Emotions.

and I LOVE IT ‼️‼️‼️

you're gonna make me cry???? 😭💦

ahhhhh....

reading this made me a bit emotional, i'm really touched...

i really did want people's opinions of the chars to go up and down and all over the place over the course of the game, because that's what happens in real life, with real people. people do things, say things, make decisions you don't understand, because we're all human and we all have our own wants, needs, struggles, challenges, moments of sheer panic, mistakes, you name it. sometimes we struggle just to get through the day or carry a conversation. sometimes we literally go off the deep end. sometimes we say things we don't mean or regret. other times we say things we wanted to but shouldn't have. and i guess i wanted to show a part of this with the game and the chars. that we're all imperfect and human. but that doesn't mean we don't deserve love and understanding. (but sometimes we need to talk things out and fess up too lkfjadf)

anyway... yeah. thank you for this, reading it really meant a lot ���

[safyresky]

LIVE BLOG THOUGHTS LIVE BLOG THOUGHTS LIVE BLOG THOUGHTS

Betty is being SO sus. I'm here for it. I don't think villainy things, but she deffo has a reason to be pushing them out and I'm like WHAT DP YOU KNOW, BETTY! IS IT MAD SANTA! WHAT DO YOU KNOW!!

Noel, who are you really married to lmao. This elf has my whole heart

Simon and Grace!!

Simon is taking it very, very well, and I am also here for THIS

"We need to find someone quickly" GIRL WHY. BREAKING IN A SANTA??? (horses listen is funny af tho)

RIP Noel's Michelangelo shirt ):

LOVE that apparently they have Mariah on retainer?

(in Jack voice) I keep freezing her and she just keeps coming back (mariah singing opening to all i want looming in the distance)

Buddy. Buddy Calvin Claus my BELOVED. He is so cute and sweet and excited I would kill for him (so would Jacquie lmao)

Sandra is REALLY NOT PASSING MY VIBE CHECK

"I needed a new nightmare anyways" Oh Buddy. Buddy I love you. SO much.

Simon is out here breaking SO MANY RULES. Man's so anxious. goodness gracious.

I bet Vomit and Chet are related

OKAY IS EDIE QUOTING THE BEE MOVIE??

CLOSE E FUCKING NOUGH.

Okay so I like that Sandra can apparently talk to animals. That combined with Buddy's like, Santa-esque knowledge of things last episode? This is a good concept! Can't wait to see how they fuck it up!

Because the PACING is so ODD, innit?

ELFS. Oh boy. I hate that they get paid in fudge? Hello?

"Too old for that shift" haha. Excellent

PIE CRIMES AND MISTLETOE MEANERS

My fiance saw the jail and went "it's a secret tool that will help us later!" (or maybe harm?)

I hate the entire ELFS scene. I miss my elfs with attitude lmao

OKAY WOBBLY WOODS.

Big fan of the expanded North Pole scenery? Vibing the alive woods that move about. They're chillin! They're vibing!

And once again, the deep talk scenes are really good! this whole Grace's Mom scene? Very good and sentimental, wish they'd GIVE HER A NAME

Sticky snow. So pretentious. IT'S ICE!

LA BEFANA! BEFANA BEFANA BEFANA BEFANA

I love her your honour!

Would love to have seen her interact with Sandra and Grace more, about the talking to animoos and such. I bet that would've been great

What is with this show and having gr8 concepts, but terrible execution due to lack of time dedicated to it??? Hello?

CHARLIE MENTION CHARLIE! He is so important (to me), I love that they are not erasing Charlie the way tsc3 did B-Man dirty ):

Also, Sandra and Santa scene is honestly really lovely? ONCE AGAIN they're rocking the deep talks.

And then we cut to Simon and Grace suddenly and it's just. It's choppy! I'm glad he has Grace as his priority but given we are 3 episodes in and Simon is still like, anxious af? We'll see how it goes.

The coat really is not vibing Simon, apparently

straight up JUMPED out of his arms did you all see that?

DON'T TELL THE WIDOW ABOUT THE MRS CLAUSE. UGH. BAD IDEA! BAD IDEA! V MAD ABOUT THIS! That's gonna be traumatic as fuck :)

Betty: try being married to that scream

Noel: immediately cheats /jk

BUT AH. NOEL/BETTY MARRIED CONFIRMED! YEAH!

"Just a bit off in the most exquisite way" BEST LINE SO FAR

Edie has passed the vibe check by accidentally poofing the Calvin-Claus's away in the middle of a bad dance scene

THAT COULD'VE BEEN SCRATCHED FOR, OH, IDK. MORE CHATS WITH BEFANA? MORE BEFANA? MORE DEPTH TO THE BEFANA PORCH SCENE--SIMON ACCEPTING SCENE??

"8 degrees above zero" to quote an icon (Ana) "these kids are going to pass away in the actual summer" fr tho! fr!

I honestly thought Edie was going to die here and then she didn't, thank goodness (and I can't believe I am saying that)

Weak episode. Slow episode. Good concepts, falling flat bc not enough time. I feel like they would've benefited if the episodes were 45 minutes instead of 30! Like it just needs a BIT MORE TIME for a few concepts to be explored to the MAX.

This week's episode got me feeling like, confused as fuck! More Befana now! Ah! Are the last two episodes going to be everything all at once? WHAT IS UP WITH THIS PACING. AH.

Into the Wobbly Woods

Befana, you have my WHOLE HEART but like...

Which just seems to be a whole ass MOOD today, lol.

So yeah! Episode 3! Thoughts! Spoilers below!

Like I said, La Befana has my WHOLE HEART but she did not get nearly enough screen time

Like. I thought we'd get to see a chat with Sandra and Befana, and they'd be ACTUALLY EXPLORING SANDRA TALKING TO ANIMALS? Like. Come on.

Santa somehow looks both better AND worse de-Santa fied. Carol really went GET YOU A MAN WHO CAN DO BOTH, huh?

Buddy CONFIRMED! And also, extra himbo-y today. I'd die for him.

Sandra has not passed my vibe check. We are halfway thru and I am UNSURE that she will pass it, period

OKAY. BEFANA USING WINTER MAGIC???? HELLO??? WHAT DID YOU ALL DO TO MY BOY

Alternative thought I had: Winter spirits can teach Christmas Spirits how to use winter magic, they just have to ask and it is done

And on that note, BEFANA AND JACK ARE FRIENDS, IT IS IN MY HEAD NOW. 100% HE TAUGHT HER THAT STICKY SNOW TRICK (it's ice) AND SHE LEFT SANTA IN IT FOR LONGER BECAUSE SHE HEARD THE FROZEN LUNATIC COMMENT!!

She's so morally grey. I love her for it.

ELFS. They went downhill, huh? Did not enjoy that scene much tbh

NFT joke :\

Befana saying the "cosign with a warlock" line was SO GOOD. I have agr8 smile shot planned where she marches into Crystal Springs City Hall and is like BLAISE. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS, AH?

And Blaise is like what the fuck IS this tho, actually???

(He changes it but Befana likes that the broom functions as a staff as well so she's gucci :3)

BETTY IS BEING A LITTLE SUS, HUH?

ALSO, REALLY RUDE OF SANTA TO NOT TELL RECENTLY WIDOWED SIMON ABOUT THE MRS CLAUS

THAT'S BULLSHIT

AH

Anyway. Doing a second watch through so brace for MORE REACTIONS lmao

[sinnerlillith]

Can you do sub Eddie smut where he’s feeling insecure so you take care of him and praise him until he feels better

this is so cute behsjbfsff but i'm not good with writing a lot of fluff weaved into long smut , so i'll do this short little smut fic instead so i can fit some wholesome parts into it.

Cw: sub eddie <3 , handjob, mention of orgasm denial, neck kisses/hickeys, praise kink, soft dom reader, tiny angst b/c sad eddie

words: 2.3k

"Eddie, there's definitely something up with you."

Eddie has been laying on your chest silently for the past 30-ish long minutes on his couch. He's never been this close to your chest and stayed silent about it. This means no typical tit jokes, requests to grope or suck, or even a random bite to them.

You could have sworn he was alseep if it weren't for your quick glances at his face, but since he's laying on you, only his eyelashes are noticeable. You look closely to see if his eyelashes flutter as he opens and closes them every few minutes, and they do, giving away the fact that he is definitely awake.

"I dunno, I jus'.... feel like shit." His voice is completely flat, a void of energy and his usual pep.

You move a hand from off his back to brush over his head of hair, as if you're petting him. You feel his chest take a deep breath after you stroke his head a little bit, signifying that he is attempting to relax.

"Are you sick?" You ask.

"Nah." his voice is still void.

"Well- so what's wrong, pretty boy?"

Pretty. Any other time, this would make his heart flutter, but right now, it makes him mentally wince. Pretty? If he's actually pretty, why does he feel far from it?

He feels... wasted away. Like he's not good enough as a musician, a boyfriend, a nephew, or even just a person. He doesn't answer your question right away, instead he takes a deep breath. He mentally prepares himself to be vulnerable to you and talk about how he feels.

"Don't feel pretty, I guess." He speaks so quietly. His arms squeeze around you, like a kid with their favorite stuffed animal, just not wanting to let go. His eyes squeeze shut as his head turns further into your breast.

"What?" you swear you've never said 'what' like that in your entire life. That was the fastest, most concerned, and most confused 'what' that has ever come out of your mouth.

"Eddie, what do you mean?" your voice is concerned.

"ugghhh," He groans into your chest. "never mind."

"No, no, wait- please just talk to me. Thats all. I wont interrupt." your hands are now on his neck and exposed cheek of his face. Your thumb caresses his warm skin as if to coax him into letting out how he feels. "Take your time, Eds."

A few quiet seconds pass. He sighs before finally speaking.

"I just don't feel, I dunno... like, myself I guess?"

You nod your head in an understanding manner, even though he cant see you.

"I don't feel good enough. Jus' don't feel 'pretty' "

Your eyes droop downward at his confession, a small frown on your face.

"Oh Ed, c'mere baby," your body begins to move to sit up, "sit up honey."

You both rise up together to sit straight on his couch. You place a hand on the opposite side of his face to turn it towards you.

"Eddie, I love you a lot. I'm so sorry that you're having a shit day-"

"Don't be sor-"

"ah! Don't interrupt Ed, not done yet."

He exhales and nods silently at you. His lips are pressed into a flat line.

"I think the best thing I can tell you right now is that emotions aren't... permanent? If that makes sense? You're gonna feel this way today, but not everyday. Do you get that?"

He nods. You place both hands on either side of his face. You let your thumbs caress his cheeks.

"Are you sure? Sorry if its shit advice, but I do love you a lot. You're gonna figure it out, and I'm here for you. All versions of you, sad or happy."

He slowly smiles at that last part. It gives him a reassured feeling to know that you'll love him, even when he's not confident. His eyes close slowly before they open up again to meet your own, showing that he's finally relaxed a bit.

"Thanks sweetheart." His voice has a hint of warmth in it.

You lean forward to him while pulling his face to meet you halfway, giving him a long peck on his lips. He smiles into the kiss, and when you pull back, his head is still in the same spot you pulled it to. His face has a sweet grin on it as he still leaned forward to you.

He looks a little goofy, but incredibly cute at the same time. You're just happy he's looking more alive now.

You mumble as you move forward again to peck his lips. "You're so pretty..."

Your head stays close to his own as you tilt it to the side to go to his neck. You push his long brown curls back.

You move forwards with intentions to place a kiss on his pulsing skin.

"you're precious." kiss

“my sweet boy.” kiss

You return back to your original position, looking him in his big brown eyes sweetly. You tuck his hair behind his ear.

All the sweet things you’ve been flattering him with makes his ears heat up. All he can focus on now is how good your lips felt on his skin. He tries to snap out of it-

He doesn’t. He can’t.

Your lips are so distracting. He mentally curses because he thinks he’s about to ruin the moment, but he really needs you. He gulps.

“Can you kiss me again?”

You blink at him. Your thighs twitch at his question, completely caught off guard, but slightly turned on by his plead.

“Oh,” you half smile, taken aback by his request. “uh ye-sure.. where?”

He shakes his head side to side and responds with almost a whisper. “Anywhere.”

His hand is now the one to pull your face in. The kiss is rushed, passionate, and you’re now fully aware of what he wants. Your movements are so sloppy and messy, you cant keep up with his fervor. You can feel your teeth clink together for a short second before you finally catch up with the kiss. 

You move closer and swing a leg over his hip to straddle him. His wide hands come up to the back of your neck attempting to pull you even closer to his firm, warm, body. Your tongues join together, rolling over each other, causing you both to make a sinful noise into each others mouth. 

Your hips sit just above his semi erection, which only causes him to get insanely more needy. Without breaking the kiss, his hands slide down your shoulders, spine, and lower back to grip your hips. He slides them forward over his semi, and rolls them back off. 

He literally sighs against your mouth, like he’s been waiting so long for this. You smile on his lips and roll your hips again without his guidance. 

And again.

And again.

And again.

Until finally, you separate your lips from his to move them to his neck. His heart is beating out of his chest at this point. His face is hot and his now fully hard dick is tightly quivering in his jeans and underwear. Your wet lips kiss his neck gently. His head falls to the side in bliss, allowing you to nip at more skin. 

“You’re so pretty, Eddie.” you say into his flesh, punctuating with an open mouth kiss. 

“My beautiful boy.” this time, punctuating with a small bite.

The wet sounds of your mouth paired with your compliments sends blood pumping all throughout his body, driving him crazy. He needs you to touch him more, somewhere else.

“Sweetheart,” he begs as he pulls one of your hands off of him, “touch me...” he places your palm over his bulge. Your head pulls back off his neck to meet his face with your eyes. You see how his dark ones are genuine, and so incredibly desperate for you, it’s almost concerning. 

You smile at him. “Take it out.”

He’s immediately moving after the words leave your mouth. He undoes his pants and slides both his underwear and jeans down to the middle of his thighs, allowing his fully hardened erection to bounce up to his stomach. 

Your finger comes down to trace the veins up and down his shaft, just wanting to admire him for a bit. And maybe be a tease. 

“Thats not what I meant, babe.” he chuckles.

“Oh yeah?” You joke back and look up at him. You bring your palm up below his chin. “Spit.” 

He looks down at your palm and lets saliva fall from his pursed lips, dropping onto your hand. You bring it down to his shaft and pump slowly, only once. You listen for his reaction, hearing him gently exhale a short breath through his nose. You pump once more, squeezing tighter so he feels more pressure when your fist lifts to his sensitive tip.

“Oh shit, do that again.” he’s pleads for you to tightly squeeze his shaft again.

You continue to stroke him at your steady pace, squeezing tight at his tip, only hearing the wet sounds of his spit in your palm, and pre cum from his tip as you rub him. His head falls back and you immediately move your mouth to his neck to suck hickeys. Once your teeth make an appearance on his neck, his hips buck up into your fist. 

He groans at your rough mouth and delicate strokes. He continues to attempt to fuck himself into your hand, but since you’re straddling his thighs, its a little hard for him. 

“Aw, you need me to go faster baby?” you say directly into his ear, making them flush red. “Needy. Use your words..” you whisper those last words lowly as your warm mouth latches onto his ear, making him gasp.

“Faster... please... go faster.” He groans. You pump him faster.

“That’s a good boy.” and shit, his dick actually twitches in your hand at your praise. He’s a sucker for those words. You suck a few more hickeys onto his neck, hearing only the wet squelching sounds of your fist around his dick, and his moans of pleasure.

“Make more noises for me, sweet boy.” you say against his neck as your head falls to his shoulder, allowing your eyes a perfect view of his dick. He curses, a hand rushing to the back of your head, the other gripping your arm that’s pumping him. 

He lets out swears and whimpers your name over and over.

“oh god... yeah- fuck- just like that.” He can’t stop rambling. “Please don’t stop..!” he slurs.

You move your face up to kiss him, swallowing his noises, but his chest vibrates and shakes with trapped groans. His hips buck involuntarily. You’re so turned on by the whole thing.

Your head eventually pulls back to align with his face. Your forehead rests on his own, but he’s having a hard time keeping his eyes open. His jaw is slack, leaving his mouth open as he pants. He tries to tuck his plush lip behind his upper teeth, but fails. 

He looks completely erotic.

“Gonna cum?” you question him.

He nods, eyes still shut, barely able to form words. 

“Too bad,” you smile. “won’t let you do that.” he pulls his head back, away from yours, and looks up at you with large saddened eyes, about to move his mouth and cry for you until you interrupt his thoughts. “Unless you say you’re a good boy, and then wait for my permission.” His eyes widen at your conditions. His face flushes in slight embarrassment at the idea, even though he’s still very much turned on.

You smile at his bashfullness. “Go on, lover boy.” you peck his pretty pink lips. “unless you want me to stop and leave you to finish your own self off...”

He visibly panics at the image of you leaving.

“fuck, ok ok, I’m...” his head falls back onto the cushions of the couch, eyes squinting shut before opening, looking at the trailer celling, then closing again. You move your face back to his neck to pepper even more kisses, since you know they drive him that crazy.

“...shit- ‘m a good boy.” he practically whines at his embarrassment, but your dominance turns him on so much. Plus, your fist is rubbing him off so perfectly.

“That’s right.” you smile on his neck and lick a long stripe up to his sweet spot under his jaw. He stays still, letting you do whatever to his hickey covered flesh.

His hands shake as they come up to grip your shirt. His head turns so his mouth is close to your ear, letting you hear every gasp, exhale, and plea. His breath speeds up and his mouth cant stay shut.

“nnngh, please please-!” 

“Aw. Please what, hun?”

���ah- you gotta let me cum now..” he whimpers through his teeth.

“Depends... are you my good boy, Eddie?” Your fist now comes up to only jerk off his tip, stimulating the most sensitive part of him over and over.

“yes, yes a good boy- ‘m a good boy.” his words slur, he’s so drunk off of just your hand. The words fall from his mouth so naturally, he’s no longer embarrassed about it. 

“My pretty boy?”

“fucking christ, yes, ‘m your pretty boy, all yours, ah! fuck!”

And just like that, you felt wet and warm stickiness trickle down your fist. He came without your permission. A part of you was a little upset, but since he’s been having a hard time, you let it slide. 

Eddie on the other hand, was too far gone in his post orgasm euphoria, paired with the after effects of your praise and the sinful actions of your hands with your sweet words and kisses. His chest rose and fell rapidly, ringed hands and firm thighs twitching on you. You notice his adams apple bob as he swallows, trying to calm his breathing, then he finally comes back down to earth.

“oh shit.” he says, completely out of breath. He looks down at your cum covered hands on his dick, “sorry, didn’t mean to do that... it just felt so good.”

You kiss his bang covered forehead, letting him know it’s ok. 

“Just glad you’re feeling better now, Ed.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.●∘◦❀◦∘●.* :☆ﾟ. ───

writing wholesome fluffy smut is not my expertise 🧍🏾‍♀️i’m a mean dom, not a soft dom so i hope it wasn’t bad 

Tag list : @cringerat @cyberfaii @dickfacemcshitboner @cringerat @eddiemvnsongf @julietsecretdiary @iveseenstrangerthings50  @sansthelonelypunster @leslieelainetrask @rafecameronswhore @foggyloverpeanuthairdo-blog @justadeanandeddieslut  @wojciechovsk @blossoming-cee @marlrocks @eddiescorrodedcoffin86 

[harold231]

It wasn't real

Pairing: Bucky x reader

Posted: 04/30/2021

Word count: 2.5k

Warnings: None? Maybe a lil angst just a lel bet.

A/N: I think it might be good? Idk You let me know. But like frfr, don't just give me feedback in your mind, put it into words. Also I apparently have a thing for Bucky in a dotted apron soooo yeah.

FYI: time zone/era is open for interpretation. Bucky never became an avenger/soldat and steve isn't part of this one.

The wind that blew around you was warm and sweet with the scent of freshly bloomed flowers. Perhaps it was an act of kindness from some God trying to distract you from the cold bitterness settling into your bones. Closing your eyes you conjure the very memory that left you so desolate.

The sun snuck it's way through the curtains to illuminate the room, effectively disturbing the sleep that you always seemed to be craving. Waking up is always hassle but whenever you remember that you get to spend your day with the only person who tolerates you and you him, getting out of bed is the easiest thing. Bucky is crazy and the damn boy is never in one spot for to long and he always has something to say, but you can't imagine how boring your days would be if you guys had never met. well technically if your parents had never met.

When you were a child you parents had to move to new york for business and they decided that Brooklyn was the place to be. You had been Bucky's neighbor and the first day you guys moved in his mom had dragged him over with the most delicious angel food cake that he so proudly claimed to have made mostly on his own. He just loved cooking and baking since forever, he would tell you that he just liked experimenting with foods but you knew the truth was that the boy liked to eat and didn't have the patience to wait for his mother to come home.

Only a few years after your family had moved to Brooklyn you and Bucky had already built an unbreakable bond. You guys had found a beautiful cherry tree one day when playing tag and had deemed it to be your's and Bucky's spot. Whenever you had a bad day or needed time away from the world you guys would go to the tree and just pick cherries, in the winter time you and Bucky would lay under the tree and kick the trunk so that the snow would fall from the leaves. It was the place where at only 15 years old bucky swore he would open his own Bakery and to quote him "I'm serving my ma's food my way doll, It's gonna be the next best thing to hit New York."

You were laying on the ground with your hands crossed behind your head looking up at Bucky swinging upside down from a branch when he told you all this. You felt something you had never felt before at that moment, looking up at the wild haired boy who loved to eat, loved his family, and had the most ambition you had ever heard from kids your age. Your heart felt full and your cheeks grew warm as you looked up at the same blue eyes you had know for years now, only this time you notice the way they twinkle in the sunlight and how rosy his lips are. Now 7 years laters you and Bucky were preparing to open the very bakery he promised you he'd open. Banners were beautifully strung along the walls and cute retro china was set out, ready to be filled for opening day. There was no hesitation from you when Bucky had asked you to run the bakery with him, you were excited to spend your days with the person you hoped you would spend the rest of your life with.

At around 6:30 in the morning you had arrived at the bakery but it seemed that Bucky had beat you to it. The smell of fresh angel food cake and cocoa danced up your nose as soon as you opened the door. Closing your eyes you smiled at the memories that it brought back. Moving to the back you grabbed your Disney themed apron and placed your bag and coat in its place before scurrying over to the kitchen while trying (and failing) to tie your apron. There in all his dorkiness was Bucky wiggling around to the chordettes. He knew that you loved the 50's aesthetic so he found a way to incorporate it without going overboard, by adding little trinkets, a jukebox, and even those cute little dining tables. In fact at the moment he was wearing a ruffly red polka dotted apron as he frosted some cupcakes.

Apron tied, you were finally ready to get to work. You walked up to Bucky bumping his hip as you reached for some cupcake pans, "Whatcha doin here so early Buck, we don't open until 12" he looks at you with squinted eyes, "The hell are you doing here so early." "Woah,woah,woah completely unprovoked. I'm just saying cuz' you were the one complaining about the opening time being set at 8. Like damn." Breathing out a huff of air he wipes his forehead with a towel "I'm sorry doll, I'm just super nervous and I couldn't sleep so I came to start baking things. I already frosted the ice cream cakes and I just finished the pies, but I was thinking that maybe we needed some cupcakes too, even though we already baked so many pastries and stuff last night I'm worried it won't be enough."

Setting down the trays you move to hug Bucky from behind holding him close to you. "Buck I know we'll do great your food is too good to pass up on especially when it's free." You place a soft kiss to his shoulder " I promise you'll do great, everything you do is amazing you try your hardest at everything Buck, You've worked your butt off and made mine considerably larger to get here, don't start losing your mind on me now." A cute little laugh from Bucky lets you know that he's hearing you and he isn't so stressed anymore. "I just want this to be perfect ya know?" with your head still against his back you nod, "I just want it to be a special day for my special girl."

You couldn't stop the slight blush that rose to your cheeks or the way that your heart suddenly started beating three times faster. You had also wanted to make him something special which is why you had got here so early. Finally releasing your hold on Bucky you straighten your apron out before gathering everything you need for some red velvet cupcakes. Bucky loved your red velvet cake so you loved making it for him. After hours of mixing, baking, and frosting had passed, you guys were rewarded with a bakery that looked as great as it smelled. "Alright doll, I'm heading out, I gotta go get ready. Meet you back here at 12 , Love ya." He didn't even give you a chance to answer as he ran right out the door. "Love you too."

You had stayed behind just a little while longer as you perfected your secret project. Carefully you added snowflakes to some of the cupcakes because you knew how much he loved snow even if he hated winter, some cats, flowers that reminded you of bucky, and one extra special cupcake. When you finish you decide to clean up a bit more and prepare some drinks for later before heading home to get ready. As soon as you got home you took a shower and did the simplest of make up with a light pink lip. You had decided to wear a dress to match the blossoming flowers that spring had brought. Pink with a yellow lace trim and flowers embroided all over the dress, matching it with some yellow flats.

You had decided that it was a perfect day for a walk so you grabbed a light scarf and slung it over your shoulders, grabbed Bucky's cupcakes, and headed over to the bakery. You felt as if a Hundred pounds had been lifted from your shoulders knowing that Bucky had felt the same way about you. You had decided that you would tell him today with your special cupcakes. As you rounded the corner you felt giddy and you couldn't wipe the smile from your face no matter how hard you tried. As you reached the bakery you saw that a majority of the people had already arrived and you knew that it would put Bucky at ease to see all the people enjoying his food. You stopped at the window, closing your eyes to take a deep breath to prepare yourself to join the celebration.

Opening your eyes you reached for the handle only to stop at the sight on the other side of the door. Bucky stood there arms wrapped around a woman eyes locked on hers as he leaned in for a kiss. It must have all happened in about 30 seconds but it felt as if time himself had slowed it down for you to watch the way he tilted her head and ran his tongue along her bottom lip before finally uniting their lips. Your heart dropped as quickly as your smile did and suddenly you felt so stupid for thinking this could be real. You willed yourself not to cry as you allowed your legs to carry you anywhere but there.

That's how you found yourself sitting underneath a blossoming cherry tree. A tree that held only happy memories because it wasn't a place you could be sad... back then. With your back against the tree and box of cupcakes full of unrequited love in your lap you realize how much you over romanticized Bucky. Opening the box you decide it would be a shame to let them go to waste. The first one you grab has a big red heart frosted in the middle, you let out a deep sigh before breaking the cupcake right down the middle. You shove half of the cupcake into your mouth and only then do you allow the tears to fall. You sat there for hours crying eating cupcakes, watching the sunset, and thinking about everything that Bucky did for you, as a friend. You realize you had no right to be angry at Bucky, after all you never told him how you felt you just assumed that he would feel the same way after so many years. With every broken memory another cupcake vanished.

He was always there for you, when no one wanted to come to your slumber party Bucky did and he even did all the girly things with you. Painting your nails, doing your hair, watching chick flicks, and pillow fights. once he even asserted that no one could protect you as well as he could, when you had decided to go camping with your friend from class so he insisted on taking you himself. Your friend was most noticeably gay so you had assumed he wanted to spend time alone with you. But now that you think back on those memories these are things that anyone would do for their bestfriend. And that's what you realized 8 hours and 11 cupcakes later.

The moon floated above you and as it's white rays settled upon the lake you decided it might be time to go home now. You get up and dust your dress off before leaning down to grab the mostly empty box. Turning around you are stopped again by what's in front of you. Bucky stands there brows furrowed as his eyes flash from you to the box in your hands. "Where the hell have you been, I've been calling you all day." swallowing the lump in your throat you go to answer but are interrupted. " everyone's been asking me about you all night and I had no damn idea what to tell them, but apparently you were just out here being inconsiderate. You go and tell me I can do great tonight, that you'd be there for me, but you weren't." You try to answer him but are again interrupted. "You could have told me something earlier instead of leaving me there like a dumb-" "SHUT UP!" this time it was your turn to interrupt him.

Taking a deep breath you look into his eyes before explaining. "Of course I was ready to be there today, you think I wore this dress to sit under a damn tree? Well I didn't. When I left my apartment I was ready and I was excited, so excited. I couldn't even stop smiling on my way over, but then I got to the shop and I saw-" Immediately you stopped as you realized what you were about to say. He cocked an eyebrow and shook his head slightly as if to say 'Hello?' "You saw what? What did you see that would make you abandon ship just like that?" Shame flushed through your being and you could no longer keep eye contact. "Nothing, you know what, it doesn't even matter. I'm sorry I was being dramatic I should have been an adult and dealt with it on my own time. And I'm sorry I abandoned you all, but the night was about you anyways."

"The night was supposed to be about the both of us so it does matter if you saw something that made you want to leave. Just tell me doll, what did you see?" his voice is soft as he pleads with you. "I saw... well I saw you kissing that lady and I just wanted get away and ended up here okay!?" You said it all in a jumble hoping that he wouldn't be able to understand what you had said. But luck wasn't your friend so of course he did. "So seeing me kiss another person was so gross to you that you had to run away, what the hell? are you 13 again?" You hadn't admitted it outloud yet and it seemed that the dumbass in front of you was going to force it out of you.

Stepping around Bucky you pull your scarf tight around your body as you focus on not crying anymore until you get home. You distract yourself by thinking of all the love you saw in all the little things Bucky did for you. Dancing around the newly furnished bakery body against body as frank sinatra brought you heart to heart, watching rom-coms and ugly crying together, but by the time you get home you force yourself to face the ugly truth. The Love was always in your head. It wasn't real.

A new wave of tears blurred your vision as teardrops fell perfectly to the ground. "It's because I have feelings for you Bucky, and I now know you don't feel the same way." Sniffling you don't bother looking up because your heart is to broken for that right now. "I'm Just gonna need a little bit of time and I'll be back good as new like nothing even happened." Still unable to lift your gaze from the ground you decide to focus on the last cupcake left in the box. 'I Love You' is written in tiny light blue frosting letters. "I uhm, uhh." That brought your attention to Bucky, as embarrassment pulsed as strong as ever through your veins. " You don't have to say anything Buck, It's fine, I'll see you next week, on monday" you hand him the box as you go to pass him "I think you would have a better use for this than me I ate 11 others already so."

Divider credits: @firefly-graphics

[turkisherlockian]

Books and Sins | Chapter Two [Benedict Cumberbatch AU]

Hello everyone! I'm Cer but you might remember me as @rosamundhr a.k.a. Rosamund, it was my nickname but I've changed my mind and I will use my own name Ceren, now. (Cer for short hehehe) Unfortunately I lost access to @rosamundhr so I will keep posting my stories here! I hope you enjoy it and I apologise for making you all wait for so long! Love you all, stay safe. 😸❤️

Summary: Katherine is a fan of Timothy Carlton, the writer who she knows nothing about. No photos, no interviews, no information, not even his age. And one day, a man comes into her life who claims to be her classmate from high school. But through the time, she has a gut feeling something is... Wrong.

Warnings: Mature content, self harm, violence, swearing.

Word count: 1855

Feedbacks are much appreciated and so motivating!

Chapter One

---

  Katherine woke up with a weird feeling inside her chest. She was mad at herself for being like this: She could like someone so easily and fall in love with them soon after. It was not her fault though, he was really charming. Too good looking to like her back. However, she tried to convince herself that she just liked him and was attracted to him because he was a writer and well... Handsome as fuck. Not to mention his gentlemanly behaviour. Taking a deep breath, she reached out for her phone to tell her best friend about it. She didn't really have lots of friends and she never complained about it, she liked solitude.

  She scolded herself for being that excited about the thought of seeing him again. He was the very first thing that was on her mind in the morning and she wanted to talk to him again. So badly.

  K: Morning!

  S: Morning to you too 🤣

You're texting me 'morning' since when?

  K: Stop being sarcastic. Can't I be nice to my best friend?

  S: Of course you can, I'm kidding. I just wondered what made you this cheerful... Or who, I should say.

  K: You know who.

  S: Oh do I?

  K: Come on, Samantha! The man I met yesterday. I can't get him out of my mind, I don't know what happened to me but he's like... Cigarette.

  S: You're smoking? Since when???

  K: Of course I don't! It was just an example, idiot. Just can't get him out of my mind. What do I do?

  S: Text him maybe?

You won't seem desperate, don't worry. I am sure he found you attractive as well and he might even be in love with you.

  K: Okay, no need to exaggerate.

What do I say, good morning or hi?

  S: It doesn't matter!

  K: Okay, I'll text you later.

Are you sure I won't seem desperate?

  S: JUST TEXT HIM FOR GOD'S SAKE!

  K: OKAY I WILL!

  S: Don't forget to tell me about it. I gotta go now, talk to you later. xxx

  K: Bye! ❤️

---

There was something different about him. Did she like him because he was attractive or because he was nice to her? She had to admit that he was attractive, but there was something else in his voice, in his looks, in the way he talked. She actually found him beautiful.

  Taking a deep breath, she finally decided to text him.

  K: Good morning. :)

  Was he still asleep? Maybe he was at work. Wait, do writers go to work? Maybe he had another job. Maybe not. Maybe he just did not want to talk to her... Why wasn't he replying?!

  She sighed in frustration as she took a big sip from her coffee and burned her tongue.

  B: Morning, Katherine.

How are you? :)

  He finally replied after 10 minutes. She bit her lip as her heart skipped a beat, and started typing.

  K: I'm good! Getting ready to go to school.

  K: I mean work.

  God, I'm an idiot, she thought.

  K: How about you?

  B: Just got out of shower, that's why I replied late by the way. Sorry about that. :)

  K: I was wondering if you would like to meet again sometime.

  She grinned as she bit her lip, that's what she always did when she was nervous or excited.

---

  K: I would love that! When will you be free?

  B:I'm always available for you.

Whenever you'd like. :)

  She started squealing in excitement. What did he just say?!

  K:I'm free in the afternoon.

  B: Wonderful. How about the café we met?

  K: Sounds good. Is 2PM okay for you?

  B: Yes. I am looking forward to it, Katherine.

  K: So am I. :)

I gotta go now, see you later. x

  B: Have a good day. See you. x

  She looked at her watch and she was 30 minutes late already. Without telling Samantha about it, she started to get ready in a hurry.

  She was never late for work, so no one was upset with her being late.

---

  ''...And my mum said I'm out of my mind!''

  Katherine just could not get him out of her mind, and she hated it. She did listen to her counselee but couldn't pay any attention, and now she was crying. She gave her a tissue, ''I understand you, Jane, and I hope telling me about it made you feel better. I know how difficult it is for you, but I have a suggestion. When I was your age, I found a way to deal with my problems: being your own counselor.'' She smiled warmly.

  ''My own counselor? How?'' The young girl sniffled.

  ''I imagined that I was told about everything I am going through, and I had to find them a way out. Think of it as if you're reading your life in third person of view. I did it for years and I still do when I don't want to tell people about my feelings. Plus, I found out that it was scientifically proven in college, so it is safe and it actually works. How does that sound?''

  She wiped her tears, ''I can try...''

  ''So tell me, what would you say to yourself if you were someone else?''

  ''I think I would say that maybe..." She sniffled, "Maybe her mother wasn't feeling good as well.''

  Katherine smiled, ''That's it! You are right. We all have problems that we don't want to tell the others and sometimes we might burn out on people we care about the most without being aware of it. You can ask your mother if she is feeling alright, it doesn't matter whether you are still upset with her or not; maybe you can help her as well just like you just helped yourself. That was very brave of you, in my opinion.'' She smiled wholeheartedly.

  The girl who was just crying smiled and said ''Thank you very much, Miss Daelan. It's going to be the first thing I'm gonna do when I'm home.''

  ''You're welcome. Feel free to talk to me anytime.'' She got up to open the door for her and then left the room as well before checking her phone.

3 new messages from Samantha

  S: Hey! Send screenshots!!!

Are you there?

Kath!

  K: I'm sorryyyy I was late to work already and then forgot to text you.

Here you go:

*screenshots*

  S: I told you that he liked you as well, he is flirting with you!

  K: No he's not!

  S: He adores you!

  K: You are really exaggerating.

  ''Miss Daelan, do you have a minute?'' Katherine looked up at the principle, "Yes, Mr Brealey."

  K: The principle wants to talk to me, I'll ttyl xxx

  S: What did he say?

  The old man opened his room's door for Katherine, she smiled and walked inside. He gestured her to sit down, "Please, have a seat." he said and closed the door. After sitting down, he cleared his throat and said "Miss Daelan, I... Erm..."

  He loosened his tie, couldn't dare to look at Katherine. His cheeks were red and there was a thin layer of sweat on his forehead. The young woman frowned a little, listening to him in curiosity. "I've known you since the day you started working here and... I must say that you are the most intelligent, kind, beautiful woman I have ever seen... I can't take my eyes off you because you're an amazing woman and I... I love you."

  Katherine was shocked, didn't know what to say at first. She did not feel honored at all, she was disgusted. "Excuse me? I thought you were married!"

  "Yes but I don't love my wife, I'm going to divorce her soon; you must understand Miss Daelan, I love you! Please give me a chance..." And now she felt her blood boil in her veins.

"I am sorry but it's never gonna happen. I suggest you to divorce your wife as soon as possible to keep her away from an asshole like you." Katherine stood up angrily and walked towards the door, "But Miss D--" and she shut the door.

  K: FUCKING HELL!

He said he loves me!

He's fucking married, Samantha!

*seen*

Are you there?

*seen*

  K: I guess you are busy

I'm going home to get ready, talk to you later xxx

  S: Sorry, I had to deal with a costumer

What a prick!!!

How dare he?

I want to kill him.

  K: Violence is never the answer but yeah, I pity on his wife to be honest. He even has children.

ANYWAY

WHAT AM I GOING TO WEAR?

S: Whatever you're comfortable with. :)

  K: How about a dress?

The one I wore when we last met?

  S: You look so hot in it 🔥

Wear that one!

  K: It covers all of my body, it's kinda tight and there's NO WAY I can look hot in it. I don't want to look pretentious anyway.

  S: Anything you wear looks good on you, love!

  K: Gay. 🤭

  S: Shut up. Wear it!

  K: LOL sorry!

I gotta go nowww

  S: Tell me all about it when you're home, IF you go back home ;) Good luck!

  K: I WILL and thanks! ❤️

  The young woman sighed as she tried to find her keys. She was still mad at the principal and it was frustrating her.

  After a short shower, she dried her hair with a towel and let her curls down on her shoulders. She wore the dress and looked in the mirror, It actually looks good, she thought. After applying some makeup and wearing her favourite her perfume, she was ready. She didn't like to wait and hated making the others wait for her as well, so she left her flat at 1:30PM. It took her 15 minutes to get to the café and she realized that she wasn't the only one who was punctual.

  "Hi..." She said as she walked towards the man she couldn't get out of her mind. He was wearing a brown jumper with beige trousers and she breathed his masculine, minty cologne in. Her heart was beating faster already.

  "Oh, hi, Katherine!" He stood up and for one second she didn't know what to do. Should she shake his hand or kiss his cheek? Or hug him? The young man leaned down and kissed her cheek before hugging her, she was shaking inside.

  He felt her body close to his. He felt her delicate, pale skin; and her linden scent made him feel dizzy. Her arms hugged his chest and he felt her plump, beautiful breasts. He watched her dress tighten around her curves as she moved.

  She was so beautiful and he could barely keep his hands to himself. He could kiss and take her right there, but didn't. He had to control himself until she submitted to him, which wasn't going to take long because it was in her blood. Submitting, obeying, and being his. He just knew it, and he was going to take what belonged to him. Katherine, belonged to him.

---

Chapter Three

Please let me know what you think! ❤️

[papirouge]

Men getting worked up over kids entertainment will never not be funny to me. I remember when the new Space Jam came out and men (and some women too I think) started whining about Lola Bunny's redesign because apparently they had removed her breasts. There was this image that compared the "old" and "new" design that started circulating where the old depicted Lola with very big breasts and the new depicted her with a flat chest. These men obviously started whining about SJW and political correctness and so on.

Well, turns out that the "old" image actually came from some coomerish fan art where Lola was drawn with far bigger breasts that her original design. Like these men probably hadn't watched nor cared about Space Jam since they were kids, forgot what Lola actually looked like and were basing their image of her on pornified fan art that they saw when older.

Not to mention that Lola Bunny wasn't designed to cater to horny males, she was in fact designed with little girls in mind. In fact, her old conceptual art depicted her as more tomboyish that the final design from the original movie (you can look it up btw). The idea was that little girls would become more interested in seeing the movie and would want to buy merch that depicted Lola Bunny in them.

Also, why would anybody be interested in seeing rabbit boobies? In a childrens movie at that?! Literally madness.

TELL THEM, ANON🍵🔥🔥🔥

It's honestly sooooo pathetic to see these grown dude being so worked up over entertainment aimed at CHILDREN/PRE TEENS but the worst is seeing ppl defend this mess as if they were victim of political correctness for...being clowned for the immature cringefest that they are. And I thought wokesters were the weak/sensitive ones..🥴

I'm in my 30s and there's no way in hell I'm gonna ever write a full on column to whine about I feel excluded from Steven Universe or whatever show is popular with kids

White men are sooo desperate to act like they're oppressed when they're the same ones mocking PC/SJW culture and how minorities have to stop complaining about medias & "performative representation" BUT WATCH THEM TURN AROUND AND DO THE EXACT SAME THING WHENEVER NON WHITE CHARACTERS ARE GETTING SHOVED INTO ENTERTAINMENT PIECES AND SCREAM ABOUT THE ERASURE OF WHITENESS🤡🤡 why so salty about Black hobbits/little mermaid/Ann Boleyn? I thought representation & Whitewhashing didn't matter and they are just TV shows and that we should just get over it? 🤡

What you're saying about Lola Bunny is so interesting bc it's a glaring example of how men feel entitled to be the standard in everything. And when they don't, they consider it a personal offense and take up their pen and whine about how "eXhaUsTinG" it is lmao. That dude from that cringe article whining about "Seeing Red" would have NEVER went out of his way to say how some shows are too masculine and not catering enough to female or children. It was 100% "i hate when it's not about me" word salad, and I can't believe that anyone would whiteknight this mess.

Lola Bunny is literally from a cartoon show which mostly cater to CHILDREN yet they cried like pissy babies bc she wasn't sexy enough. Their scrotism is showing. There's no wonder masculinity is dying. But MuH aTtacK aGaInsT sTRaiGht WhitE mEN right? They are self suiciding themselves. Grown Western men be more bothered about anthropomorphic bunny than having kids and building their future. Pathetic and weak.

[cherry-gemz]

The City by the Bay: Part V

Summary: Fates push you and a handsome and known stranger into each other's paths. His chilvary and good looks make you take a leap into his world and more.

Chapter: The woman in Keanu's house is revealed; you and Keanu go out on an official date to his book signing.

Catch up HERE

Pairing: Keanu Reeves x Y/N (F!Reader)

Rating: Mature, 18+

Word count: 2.5k

Who might be interested: @whiskeyslullabye ​ @marissat1998 @aestheticallywinchester ​ @fookingbetch @keanureevesisbae @romereadingshop @a-little-counter-esperanto

“I’m Mnfhdphf,” you mumble with your mouth full.

"What?" She asks again, annoyed.

"She's Y/N, Meredith," Keanu replies as he walks in, pulling a shirt over his head.

"I'm Y/N," you finally respond clearly.

"Yeah, got that," she chides.

Keanu walks over to you and grabs a piece of cheese, popping it in his mouth.

"Y/N, this is Meredith...my agent. Meredith, Y/N...Y/N is my guest."

"Oooh, your agent. N-nice to meet you," you reply and hold out your hand.

She gives you a curtly smile, but you know it's ingenuine.

"What the hell, Keanu?" She directs her annoyance to him.

As if he already knows what she's thinking, he raised his hand into submission.

"Look, it was a small accident. No one got hurt."

She tuts at him and tosses the manilla envelope on the marble slab counter.

"What's this?" He asks innocently and takes the document.

"A role...they're filming here in the city. Figured you'd be interested since your project has kept you here."

You tug at the hem of his shirt and cough, "I'll leave you to it...just gonna go get dressed."

"That would be best," Meredith snaps.

"Play nice," Keanu says unphased and reviews the script. "Huh…"

You hear him discuss a few things with her as you scamper to the living room to grab you jeans.

"What?"

He scratches the back of his neck and cranes it to the side, "I dunno, Mer. It's um…"

"It's what?"

"Dancing?"

"Yeah, so?"

"I dunno how to dance. I haven't done something like this," he shakes his head and tosses the script haphazardly on the counter.

You jump into your jeans and quickly button the button.

"Did you say dancing?" You ask across the living room.

Meredith crosses her arms and rolls her eyes.

"Yeah, this role requires me to waltz."

"There's this dance studio on Van Ness. We passed it coming here…" you quickly reply, thinking that the last time you were there was with your ex.

"Let me guess, you're a dancer," Meredith retorts.

"No...I work at a bookstore...I mean that's not all I do…"

"She's a chef, Mer. Lay off," Keanu replies.

"Oh fantastic. You almost kill yourself while riding in the rain with a bookstore girl?"

Keanu's hand motioned her to stop, "If this is about the accident, it was my fault. Don't out blame on Y/N."

"You can't just go gallivanting around the city! Or you at least call me to tell me you're okay! I had to call a million people, plus the studio, and lie until I saw you. You didn't answer your phone!"

"I'm sorry…" you pipe up. "I didn't mean for things to get out of hand...if you want me to leave-"

"YES."

"No," Keanu said cooly.

Meredith shot Keanu a death glare, but he shrugged it off and grabbed a water bottle from the fridge.

"Keanu…" she started to say as he shook his head.

"You got what you came for, Mer. You saw me, I'm fine. I'll take a look at the script and let you know. I'll call you in the morning."

"But-"

"Now, Mer I know you're coming from a good place, but you've been rude to my guest. So please see yourself at the door and we'll talk later."

Meredith's mouth stayed open like a cod fish and shot daggers over your way.

"Fine. Let me know first thing in the morning. Otherwise who knows, Hugh Jackman might swoop in on this. And don't forget, you have the signing party tomorrow night."

"Yeah, okay, Mer. Thanks."

She pivoted on her heel and headed to the foyer and out the door.

You plopped on the leather couch, stunned at their interaction.

"Gosh…" you were able to say. "I didn't think that would happen to me today."

"I'm sorry, Y/N. Meredith means well. She's tough as nails and has been my agent for years. I get why she was upset, but she had no right to talk to you that way."

He picked up the folder and walked over to the couch to sit next to you.

"It's okay...I mean, I don't know her from Adam. But definitely don't want to be on her bad side again."

"Heh, yeah. Me either."

You gulp as he sits comfortably next to you. Is this what it's like? Being normal next to the global superstar? Just be cool, Y/N.

"So, do you have any plans tomorrow?"

Your voice cracks, "What?"

"I had a fantastic time with you...I hope there will be more…" he smacks his forehead and blushes, "Gosh. I didn't mean it like that."

You stifle a giggle. I hope there will be more moments like that in the bedroom.

"What I mean to say is, I'd like you to be my date tomorrow at this signing thing...that is if you'd like to come?'

***

The next day you're on cloud nine. You've chatted to your brother about meeting the famous actor and he hadn't stopped asking you how he was and is he as cool as he seems. It's as if he wanted to go out on a date with him instead.

“Ask him for an autograph,” he asks.

“You’ve got to be kidding me, CJ,” you roll your eyes as you pace your bedroom.

“What? Not for you, for me!”

“Shut up.”

“C’mon, I have my Matrix poster that I can give you-“

“I’m going? Ceej.”

“No, wait. Ask him more about Cyberpunk...like can he-“

“Bye, dude!” You reply and end the call. It was just you and your brother these days, your parents had passed on and while you loved him, he did drive you crazy from time to time. He was finishing his senior year at Sac state and being your baby brother, you’d think you were the protector. But instead he always was the one to check in on you, to make sure you were eating all your food groups and drinking water. You loved that nut despite his spaziness.

You find yourself going through your closet for an evening with the superstar. You pick up from your bed a black leather pencil skirt and hold it up to your waist. Unsure if you can pull it off and not really knowing what you'd match it with.

Your bedroom door swings open and it's your neighbor's teenage daughter, Cori.

"Oooh, what are you doing tonight?' she teased as she crunched the apple she held in her hand.

"Help yourself, Cor," you roll your eyes alluding to the fruit that she took from your counter. You toss the skirt on the bed, then pick up a pair of your comfy boyfriend jeans.

"I got some Dr. Marten's that would go great with that skirt," she says and plops down the bed, rummaging through your clothes.

"I have worn Doc Marten's before you were born," you laugh. She's a cute kid. Hella beautiful and smart. She's talked about joining the Air Force one day and you hope she gets there.

"You need to show some leg, Y/N."

"What are you doing here?" You tut and she hands you the pretty floral silk mini dress that you bought for a wedding last year and never wore again.

"It's for tonight. It'll be cold."

"Even better, he'll have to give you his jacket."

"How do you even know about these things? You're fifteen."

"Fifteen is the new twenty," she shrugs and gets up to your closet.

You stare at the dress. It's an outfit that does accentuate your legs and you've felt cute in it. Maybe Cori is right…

She returns and hands you a faux leather jacket that you bought at some boutique a few months ago.

"I dunno…"

She shoves it to your chest, "Trust me."

"I'm not sure if this is the right outfit for the event."

"What's it for then?"

"A book signing or something?"

"Ooh, he's an artist?"

"Kind of… thespian…" you blush and pull your shirt over your head and reach for the dress.

"Oh, like locally?" She crunches another bite of the apple and leans on the doorframe.

"Not exactly…"

You pull the leather jacket on and peer at your full length mirror. You look pretty good: chic and cool, not trying too hard, but an effort nonetheless.

"Black tights," she clicks her tongue and waggles her brows.

"Is that seriously in?"

"It's hot. Sheer tights and my boots, c'mon, Y/N."

"I dunno."

"Is he hot?"

You blush at the thought of Keanu and then that you're talking to a teenager about your love life.

"Oh, he is. Okay I'll be back with my boots," she replies and rushes out of the room.

"Cor! Wait!" You yell, but she's already down the hall. You look back at your reflection and bit your lip.

I can do this. What is one little night out with the man of your dreams? Nothing to be worried about.

***

Keanu insisted on picking you up despite your resistance. You told him it was fine and you could just meet up. He wouldn’t take no for an answer. Which secretly you enjoyed.

The roar of his motorcycle echoed down your street and you pretended like you weren’t waiting for him for 30 minutes on your couch. Your palms were sweaty an your hair was falling flat, but the excitement was overwhelming.

The knock at your door startled you despite your ability to hear him approach your doorstep. You take one more look at yourself in the hall mirror and then open the door. He’s wearing a nice coat, a v-neck gray shirt, and jeans. Maybe you overdressed?

“Wow,” he says as you open the door. “I leveled up for sure.” You giggle as he hands you a bouquet of wildflowers. The bursts of yellow and orange are gorgeous and he can tell you’re pleased with them.

“Beautiful flowers for a beautiful lady,” he smirks. You give him a kiss on the cheek.

“Thank you…” you reply. “Come on in, I’ll put them in water and we can head out.”

He nods in agreement as you pivot towards your kitchen, nervous that you have him in your apartment. Keanu Reeves is in your apartment. Get it together Y/N, he was between your thighs the day before. You silently chuckle to yourself as an image flashes to your brain.

“What’s so funny?” he asks as you stare at him, caught in your thirsty moment.

"Oh, uh nothing really."

He smiles and rubs his chin, as if he could read your mind.

"I'm really looking forward to this,' he replies.

"Me, too. I hope I don't get too much in the way," you reply as you place the flowers in a vase full of water.

"Of course not," he leans his elbows on your kitchen counter. He fits here, you think. "I just hope it's not too boring."

"A night out with Keanu Reeves? Anything but boring."

He grimaces and smiles again, "No pressure."

"No pressure."

He claps his hands together and rubs them in eagerness. He's hit with a quick pain and grabs his side.

"Ke...you okay?" You leave the vase on the counter and go to his aid.

He gently touches his shoulder from the fall the day with you.

"Yeah, just got a little excited, heh. Ke. I like that."

A smile is brought to your face as you realized you called him that. It wasn't like you had thought of it before, but it fit.

"Do you need me to look at it?"

He cocked his brow, "Trying to get me shirtless again, Y/N?"

"I mean...not gonna lie. That does sound like a fun time…”

“Hey, I thought it was the intent to wine and dine you.”

“Is that so?” You coo and approach him, placing your hand on his chest. His brown eyes are soulful and deep, you could get lost in them. He leans in for a kiss and you close your eyes. His lips ignite a desire within and he encloses the gap and wraps hands around your waist. You press your body against his, the thinness of your dress makes the apex of your thighs ache.

He reluctantly pulls away, "At this rate I should cancel tonight."

"You can do that?"

"Sure, just let me call Meredith and you can tell why I won't be showing," he teases and pulls out his phone. You quickly grab it from his grasp.

"No, no need for that!"

"You sure? I bet she'd love to hear from you."

You look at his screen and pull open the camera app to take a candid shot of you two. Your first photo together.

"Let's go before I get you into more trouble."

***

BRZRKR. It's a comic book. You're attending Keanu's comic book signing party. CJ is going to flip his lid.

You arrive at a nearby bookstore, smaller than the one you work at, but it's filled with memorabilia, dolls, comics, posters of all types, heroes and anti-heroes.

Keanu downplayed this to the umpth degree. Considering how small the store was, it's jam packed with fans and media.

This is a big deal. Leave it to Keanu to say it was going to be an intimate evening. An intimate evening with 100 people you think to yourself.

The two of you didn't really talk about how to address things considering you showed up together. You were a bit busy hanging onto his strong abs as he whisked you away on his motorcycle through the city. So you weren't prepared with the paparazzi and journalists buzzing your way, trying to get a shot of the mystery woman who Keanu had arrived with.

He was escorted to the back of the store, you saw Meredith and she ignored you, purposefully. As he and the head comic writer dove into a Q&A session of how the idea was brought to life, a woman around your age accidentally bumps into you.

"Oh, excuse me!" She whispers as people continue to snap photos.

"It's okay," you reply and smile.

"This is something, huh?"

"Yeah," you nod, trying to hear what he says about comic series.

"What magazine are you with?" The woman asks. She's wearing Doc Marten's and you stifle a laugh to yourself.

"Me? Oh, I'm not a journalist. I work in a bookstore."

"This one?" She asks as she folds her arms, peering over to the table. Her hair, braided, is a natural red which is ridiculously beautiful. She's like a siren, and particularly calm.

"Oh no, just on Columbus. City Lights."

"Oh neat, so then you're a comic book enthusiast?"

"Me? I mean I've dabbled in Marvel and DC. But nothing like this."

"Yeah, tickets were hard to get for sure. I had to pull a few strings just to get this pass," she says and holds up a press lanyard.

"Oh," you reply. The crowd laughs and Keanu shakes his head smiling. Dangit, I wish I knew what they were talking about.

"How'd you get yours?"

"Um, Meredith gave it to me," you reply and then realized maybe you've said too much.

"Cool," the woman says unphased. "Mischa."

"Y\N," you say and then turn your attention to Keanu. "I'm gonna try to get a closer look," you say as a segway to leave.

"Oh sure, talk to you later," Mischa replies as you snake around the crowd to hear better.

***

After almost two hours, Keanu has done some meet and greets, and other press photos. You hang out in the back and peruse the rest of the store. Meredith approaches you from behind.

"So, what did you think?" She's wearing a slick, blush power suit and she looks amazing. Her short brunette hair is styled and for a second, she actually looks approachable.

"Very educational," you smile.

"Surprised you stayed this long."

"I hadn't realized what this actually was. Ke didn't make it sound like a big deal."

"Ke?"

"Um yeah," you blush. "Just a nickname."

"Already there, huh?" She stuffs her hands in her pants pocket and you don't understand the chip she has on her shoulder.

You ignore her comment,"So should I stay around?"

"He probably wouldn't notice you gone."

You give her a side eye, the nerve.

"Who's gone?" Keanu asks as he turns the corner and is between the two of you.

"No one," you beam as he places his hand on your shoulder.

"Mer you treating my girl alright?"

She grabs a wine glass from a nearby waiter and smirks, saying nothing and then walks away.

"Like a bulldog," you say as she disappears in the crowd.

"How about we get out of here?" He says and draws himself closer to you. "You smell fantastic by the way, did I mention that yet?"

You giggle and shake your head no, "What do you have in mind?"

"Are you up to show me the City at night?"

[mrgan]

Buttermilk Biscuits

Everyone loves biscuits! And if you look up how to make them, basically every recipe is about the same. Mine isn't anything earth-shattering, but it does have one unusual step. Scroll on down to find out what it is! (The secret is folding more than you think you should—ed.)

Neven's Buttermilk Biscuits

Servings: 6-9 biscuits Time: 15 minute mix + 15 minute fold + 30 minute bake

INGREDIENTS:

280 g all-purpose flour

80 g high-gluten flour (or more APF)

25 g sugar

10 g salt

4 teaspoons baking powder

½ teaspoon baking soda

165 g (1.5 sticks) unsalted butter, very cold

1 ¼ cup buttermilk, cold

DIRECTIONS:

First, the most important thing: keep everything as cold as you can. Place a large bowl in the fridge if you can; pop the whole butter sticks into the freezer as you prep.

Put a sheet of parchment paper on a half-sheet pan (18″ × 13″) as your final landing area for the cut biscuits. Pre-heat your oven to 400ºF with a rack in the top third of the oven.

In the cold bowl, whisk together your flour(s), sugar, salt, baking powder, and baking soda. Grab your whole sticks of cold butter and grate them (using the side with the large, pizza-cheese holes) into the bowl with the flour. Using a spatula, fold gently to combine, but without mushing up the butter shreds.

Pour in the buttermilk and fold again with that spatula. You're trying to kind of sort of get it uniform, but it'll still look like an awful mess. Your goal is just to integrate the big pool of dry flour from the bottom of the bowl into a shaggy mass in the middle.

Dust with flour a surface as big as you can afford: a workbench, a clean counter, a large cutting board. Gently flip your "dough" (lol) onto it and shake out any remaining flour from the bowl. It will look like an intimidating, dry mound; that's to be expected.

Grab a bench scraper or another thin, flat-sided tool. (A small, flexible cutting board works.) Now press gently from the sides and the top of your pile to form a sort of tight box. Don't squeeze it like Play-Doh™, but do try to pack it.

Using your scraper tool, go under the sides of the dough and make sure it's not stuck to the work surface. Still using the scraper to help you, flip one third from any side over the middle; then flip the remaining third to make a thicker shape with 2 folds in it, like a letter (you know how we all fold letters all the time these days?) Press down to get the whole thing to the original, starting height again. This is your basic biscuit-folding move; this is what builds those flaky layers, butter being laminated between strata of flour.

Here comes the unusual part of my recipe: where most write-ups will tell you to repeat this two or three times, I'm going to suggest that you do so a dozen times. That's right, get a solid 36 folds in there (each step creates 3 "folds"). The thing is, I don't "mix" my dough much in the previous steps, so this folding is how we'll get the whole thing together and develop lots of layers. If it sounds like a lot of work, don't worry; once you figure out the folding move (which you have to do either way), it only gets easier as you repeat it.

The dough should keep getting more flexible and easier to work with as the flour is integrated into it. If you start to feel some sticking, add a bit of flour to the sticky spots, but don't go wild with it. If the whole thing sticks to the work surface, use that scraper and move along and under the sides again to free it, and maybe add a bit of flour there.

Toward the last 3-4 folds, you can start using a rolling pin to ensure an even height to your dough. The end result should be a rectangle 1.5" thick and maybe 9" × 13" in size, fairly smooth and without any huge spots of butter or flour in it. Press in the sides to ensure a square-ish appearance to the thing, but don't expect perfection.

Once you're satisfied with the final folded dough, cut off those raggedy sides; they'd impede a clean vertical rise of your biscuits. Use your scraper tool—or a big knife—to cut about ½" off each side so the remaining rectangle is super sharp and even. Cut straight down with no sawing motion; just slam straight down confidently. I believe in you.

Using the same BAM! cutting motion, divide your dough rectangle into 6-9 biscuits; how many is up to you and your idea of what looks good and what's possible with the dough. Move the cut biscuits gently—separating from the work surface with that scraper tool if nedded—to the prepared sheet pan with the parchment paper on it. Keep a 1-2" space between your biscuits as they will expand some during the bake.

Discard the cut-off dough… I'm just kidding, come on. Take those end scraps and press them together from their sides to make a sort of rectangle with them. Letter-fold the rectangle again as best as you can, press down to make it neat, and cut however many biscuits it will produce (2? 3?) Cut off the sides again and press them into one wacky biscuit that'll rise unevenly but still be delicious. This should be your only un-square biscuit. Move all the new biscuits to the prepared sheet pan.

Grab another ¼ cup buttermilk and brush the tops of your biscuits with it; just enough to cover them, without getting goopy. Pop the whole thing into the oven and set a timer for 20 minutes. Rotate halfway through that time if you're around.

Check your biscuits' appearance: golden, with some dark areas along the top? Are the bottoms also developing a nice crust? You might not be done after 20 minutes, so feel free to set a timer for another 3-12 minutes, as needed.

When your biscuits look so good you want to build an ethical photo-sharing platform just to show them to the world, remove them from the oven. Feel free to brush them with butter. (Just running that remaining half a stick of butter over them like lip gloss will do.) Let them cool for at least 10 minutes before eating them.

PRO TIPS:

Try to find full-fat buttermilk. Sometimes it's called "Bulgarian style" or another exotic name that means it's flavorful and good.

You can freeze unbaked biscuits. Once your biscuits are cut and on the sheet pan, place the whole sheet pan in the freezer for 2 hours, uncovered. When the biscuits are rock-hard, move them to a freezer bag, fold to get all the air out of the bag, close, and store in the freezer for, like, 3 months or so. Bake from frozen (DO NOT THAW) and add 5-15 minutes to the bake time, until they look delectable.

Do you think grating butter is weird? Are you weirded out by it? You can also cut it to a fine dice and then press it into flat discs in the flour using your hands. It's a free country.

Leftover biscuits should be stored in a closed container once they're fully cooled off. You can keep them around on the counter for 2-3 days, and reheat in a low oven, either whole or split.

I'm gonna hide a Mega Pro Tip here where no one will read it: buttermilk is incredibly delicious and you should just drink it out of a glass.

[rewatching-supernatural]

s13e01

Alright so, I took a few hours off after ending season 12

Here are my thoughts:

1. I hope we never ever hear about the British Men of Letters ever again. That was the worst story line in the entire show.

2. Mary's lost in the Apocalypse World and honestly? Too bad. I don't care. But I know the Winchesters do so we'll probably have this new quest of going there to rescue her, but without bringing Lucifer back somehow

3. Crowley is dead, which is really fucking sad, but with what the writers did to him, I'm glad, because I couldn't suffer through more of that character destruction. They should have killed him when they ran out of stories with him in the beginning of season 10

4. Castiel is dead, which is just... so you take fan favourite Crowley, spend two years destroying him, you take fan favourite Castiel, take two years of barely seeing him and when we do it's to stab the Winchesters in the back or outright ignore them, and you kill both in one episode. So now, all we have is Sam, Dean, and Jack, whom we haven't met yet really but we know he's born

5. This ever powerful limitless being Jack is born and this is the only thing that can bring back Supernatural in Supernatural. So, let's see where that leads us.

Season 13, let's go

*****

Jack's asking Sam if he's his father, but uhm, nope

Your father just died

Oh Dean come on, don't come in shooting at the kid! what the hell!

*****

Jack's walking around naked

This guy is making his menu about butts 😂

Jack's looking for his father, but does he mean Cas, or Lucifer?

*****

Dean can't say it

"Crowkey's dead, Kelly's dead, Cas is... Mom's gone, and apparently, the Devil's kid hit puberty in 30 seconds flat."

*****

Jack is very... muscular, for someone who was born less than 12 hours ago

*****

Castiel 😭😭😭😭😭

*****

They gave Jack some clothes, that's nice

and the sheriff thinks he has some mental disability

so Jack does remember some stuff, he remembers his mom is in Heaven, and his dad was supposed to be here, and the bad woman burned

- What are you on? [implying drugs]

- I'm on a chair... on the floor... on the planet Earth.

Man, Jack and Cas are really gonna be best friends once they meet 😂

*****

Sam's reaction to the Butt menu 😂

Dean went off to punch something in anger, poor boy ❤️

*****

Did Clark and Jack leave?!

oh, no, they're on the floor eating snacks 😂

Jack likes nougat

and he can do magic things, sometimes by accident

*****

why is she arresting them? didn't they say they're FBI?

*****

Jack and Sam interacting is the sweetest thing to be honest

it's wholesome on another level

And Sam learning that Jack picked Castiel as his father 😔❤️

Having to tell Jack that Castiel died 😭

*****

Okay so, I think the story arc here is to have us start caring and loving Jack as we loved Cas

He's Castiel's son, they have similar personalities, Jack replaces Cas in the dynamic

*****

Jack's stronger than an angel blade to the heart

Of course he is, he's a nephilim

*****

Dean's agreeing to bring Jack back to the Bunker, yes! We'll get more Jack content, and I'm excited about that! We haven't seen much of the character and I already love him

*****

Oh we're seeing what Dean did at the restaurant

he prayed to God, to Chuck, asking him to bring Cas back 😭😭😭

to bring back Cas, and Mary, and even Crowley

but of course, he didn't care, he never does

*****

Dean's barely holding on, getting Cas ready for a hunter funeral

*****

[when-they-write-stuff]

I've only just discovered your blog and I'm already in love with your writing. If you want to, could you do 30) “Just remember, if we get in trouble, you're deaf and I don't speak English.” from your prompts list for sterek?

Aww, you’re fantastic! I had fun with this one <3

- -

“Just remember, if we get in trouble, you're deaf and I don't speak English.”

“Stiles,” another voice said, sounding nervous. “That’s a terrible idea. You don’t know anything other than English.”

“Yes, Scotty, but if we get into trouble, nobody needs to know that, do they?”

Derek heard the sound of a sigh and curiously moved across the bar, picking up an already clean glass and rubbing at it like he was actually doing his job. Two kids sat on the stools with their backs to him; one with dark floppy hair and one with shorter brown hair and nervous fingers tapping against the bar counter. 

Moving behind them, Derek cleared his throat. They both spun around and the paler one startled with a squawk, nearly tumbling off of his seat. His friend reached out and steadied him at the last moment.

“Can I get you two anything?” Derek said, studying both their faces. The paler one leaned forward with a small grin, amber eyes dancing.

“Two rum and cokes, please.”

“ID?”

The boy with the floppy hair made a sharp noise in the back of his throat. The other kid elbowed him and grinned at Derek again, before pulling out his wallet. Derek took the ID handed to him and studied it, before raising a brow.

“What the hell kind of name is that?”

“Hey, dude!” The kid protested, looking offended. “You can’t go around saying things like that. So not cool!”

“It’s Stiles,” the other boy said, nervously slipping his ID over the counter too. “We call him Stiles.”

“What the hell kind of name is Stiles?”

“It’s my name, asshole,” Stiles said, glaring. Derek huffed and looked from his ID to his friend’s— Scott McCall— and then pushed them both back. 

“There’s no way you two are twenty-one.”

“Excuse me!” Stiles said, flailing a little. “The ID says it, does it not?”

“Clearly, it’s a fake.”

“I’ll have you know I am only a few months away from being twenty-one,” Stiles said, with a whiny note in his voice. “And it doesn’t make sense that I’m old enough to vote and live on my own, but not drink. Can’t you be a pal and overlook things just this once?”

“Two cokes,” Derek said, undeterred. “Coming right up.”

“You’re a terrible person.”

Derek ignored him and turned away, grabbing two glasses and two cans of soda. He couldn’t deny that he’d been half-tempted to give the kid a break, but if Laura found out she would have his hide. And that’s the last thing Derek needed.

Scott wasn’t paying any attention when Derek slid the two drinks over, but Stiles was watching his face. The kid had a mischievous glint in his eyes that made Derek nervous, and an uptick to his lips that made his stomach flip. Stiles leaned forward, ignoring his drink, and rested his chin on his palms.

“So, what’s a fine gentleman like you doing in a place like this?”

“I work here.”

“Well, clearly,” Stiles said, snorting. “But come on, dude, you’re too pretty to be working in a club like this. Those eyebrows were made for the billboards.”

“My eyebrows.”

“Very sexy,” Stiles said, nodding. “Ten out of ten. You kind of look like you could tear me apart with your bare hands and I don’t think that should be such a turn on.”

Derek rolled his eyes, unable to help it. This guy was something else. “You’re ridiculous.”

“No, I’m Stiles. And you are?”

Derek stared at him for a moment. Then he grunted and turned away, and Stiles made a noise like a dying cat. 

“Wait, dude, I’m sorry! No more dad jokes, I swear. I’ll be good.”

Slowly, Derek turned back around. The mischievous gleam had left Stiles’s eyes and he offered out a hand, fingers wiggling through the air. 

“My full name is Mieczysław. But most people call me Stiles because that’s all they can really manage.”

“Mie— whatever— sounds nothing like Stiles.”

“Yes, but Stiles is fun to say, right?”

Derek sighed and took his hand, feeling a little ridiculous. “I’m Derek.”

“Derek Hale?”

“Yes,” Derek said, narrowing his eyes. “What of it?”

“Dude, your sister owns this palace! I basically just called it a dump, how have you not kicked me out already?”

“I’m tempted,” Derek said. “Would you like me to?”

“You know, I’m gonna pass, thanks.”

Derek smothered the urge to chuckle. For some reason, he didn’t feel the urge to give the kid the boot. Instead, he was kind of hoping Erica or Boyd would come relieve him of his shift already so he could sit down and have an actual conversation.

Which was stupid. Of course.

“So, Derek,” Stiles said, putting extra emphasis on his name. “I have no doubts you have people hitting on you twenty-four-seven due to the—” Stiles gestured through the air and then pointed at his face. “Eyebrows. But if I went on a limb out here and asked for a number, would I be successful?”

“Probably not, but you could try anyway.”

“Playing hard to get,” Stiles said, grinning. He was confident in a way that made Derek feel impressed instead of annoyed. It was… annoying. Or something. “I like that. Should I use a cliche pickup line or just flat out ask?”

Derek only smirked. Stiles’s grin widened and he thought for a moment.

“I bet my number sounds nicer than yours,” he said after a few seconds. “Want to hear it?”

“That was terrible.”

“Okay, then. Give me your number, so we can rant to each other during GOT.”

“Seriously?”

“If you give me your number,” Stiles said with a wink. “I promise to spam you with pictures of cute puppies on a daily basis.”

“That was a little better,” Derek said. “But still terrible.”

“Yeah, well if you think I’m terrible at flirting now, just wait until you flirt with me over the phone.”

He was relentless, Derek had to give him that. He nearly considered making Stiles come up with some stupid pickup lines a little more, simply because he was enjoying him trying, when a hand touched him on the shoulder. Derek jumped and spun around.

“Oh shit,” Laura said, a smirk tugging at the corner of her lips. “I don’t think I’ve ever snuck up on you before, Der. Having a nice conversation?”

“Der?” Stiles said, his eyes lighting up. “Oh my god, that’s adorable!”

“Shut up,” Derek said, glaring at his sister. “Laura, what are you doing? Aren’t Erica and Boyd on shift tonight?”

“I could tell you were having fun,” Laura said. “So I gave them an extra thirty minutes. You know what they like to get down to in thirty minutes.”

“That’s so gross, please never speak to me again.”

“Hm,” Laura said, looking over at Stiles. She offered a hand, which he took with a bright smile. “You’re cute, kid. But clearly not twenty-one.”

“Why does everyone keep saying that? I could be!”

“Not dressed like that, you’re not.”

Stiles looked down at himself; his plaid t-shirt and baggy jeans. His face colored red and he shrugged, looking back up. “I’m getting there.”

“Then maybe I’ll second guess kicking you out.”

“That would be very much appreciated,” Stiles said with a grin. “Though Der here tried that line too.”

“Oh,” Laura said, turning back around. “Did he?”

Derek rolled his eyes. Before he could say a word, though, Stiles’s phone was blaring and the kid cursed, fishing it out of his pocket. He looked at the screen, then sighed, flipping it off. 

“I’ve gotta go,” he said, turning to his friend. “Scotty, you still with me?”

Scott looked like he’d spent the entire time staring across the club. Derek followed his gaze to see a brown-haired girl dancing with a red-haired girl, completely oblivious to her admirer. Scott’s face was colored pink when he nodded. “We leaving?”

“Dad gets home in fifteen and if I’m not around to make dinner, you know he’ll order a pizza. Or worse, two.”

Derek was surprised to feel a sudden rush of disappointment at hearing that. He couldn’t believe he actually enjoyed talking to Stiles. The guy was annoying as hell, but amusing too. And Derek didn’t actually hate all of his pickup lines.

Stiles thought his eyebrows were sexy.

Shaking his head, Derek turned around and busied himself in cleaning the opposite counter. He could feel Stiles’s eyes on him and for a second, he thought the guy would say something. But then Scott said something Derek didn’t catch and Stiles started away.

Derek glared at the floor.

“Nice,” Laura said, patting him on the shoulder. “You almost had him there, little bro.”

“Shut up,” Derek said, shrugging her off. “Tell Boyd and Erica it’s my turn for a break, would you? And I’m not going into the break room until it’s been thoroughly sanitized.”

Laura only chuckled and started away. Derek glared at nothing for a second longer, before turning around to clean up the glasses Scott and Stiles had left.

Except, there was a napkin left too. One with the worst handwriting Derek had ever seen, reading; “I like your face, Sourpuss. Text me?”

Underneath was a number. Derek shook his head and huffed, but tucked the napkin into his pocket. No one would ever know if he was smiling slightly at that, or if he searched the club one more time looking for an idiot in plaid.

So maybe Stiles was the stupidest name Derek had ever heard. But the kid was a good flirt.

And he thought Derek’s eyebrows were sexy.

- -

I don’t usually do one-shots as AU’s, but this one started writing itself and I decided to just roll with it. Thanks for the prompt, my friend, I had fun!

(Support your overcaffinated (so much so) student writer? Seriously, I’d adore you guys so much). https://ko-fi.com/rh27writer

[growingupautie]

StoryTime: All That and a Bag of...

At my previous job, I and a coworker or two would often grab lunch at a local restaurant. Usually, it was just me and one other guy thought. Sometimes we'd go to the pizza place. Sometimes the Chinese place down the street. There were a few good spots but we went to them all the time so they got pretty boring. Isn't it funny how when you finally have access to almost any food, you end up feeling like nothing sounds good and taking it for granted?

One day, most of my coworkers were busy, and my go-to guy told me he had errands to run. I drove by the Chinese place we usually go to and parked my car. But as I got out, I saw the Subway next to it and decided that since nobody ever wanted to go there, I would do that instead. I closed my car door and felt someone watching behind me. It felt like they were ready to make their move and ambush me with something but there was a distinct lack of a feeling of ill-intent.

I started to rush off toward the entrance as I hear from the watcher behind me "HEY! Hey man! Can you uh...I don't get paid for two weeks and I just started a new job...Can you buy me lunch and I'll pay you back?" I look back and see an older man in his late 30's sitting in his beat-up work truck wearing a neon work vest frantically awaiting my answer. "Uh..." I said, not really wanting to interact with anyone that day but feeling like I was long overdue for a good deed. "Sure, man...Come on."

He said "Are you serious?! Thank you. Oh, God. Thank you. God Bless you." and he leaped out of his truck, and threw the door shut running toward me. He held the door open for me and said "I'll pay you back. I promise." When I do things like this for people, I don't really want to be paid back and as I told him, it "wouldn't be much of a good deed if I did." He thanked me with an oddly frantic nature and seemed to almost get teary-eyed.

I thought to myself about how rare kindness must be to him if that small amount elicited that response. Then I realized that it most certainly was to me, and that's about the same amount of kindness it would take to move me as well. "I haven't eaten in a few days..." he told me. "I just started this new job, and I'm in a bad way until I get paid." He added. As his words hit me I said with a somewhat heavier heart. "Well, you're eating today, man. Get whatever you want.

The person in line ahead of us turned around and mean mugged him, and looked at me as if to say I was being scammed. That the guy was just in it for a free meal. Honestly, He could've been right in that moment for all I knew. But the truth is, I didn't care. I'd rather it be a free food scam than any other type because it's still a good deed done in the name of goodness.

But at the same time, I felt like this guy was either legitimate or extremely exaggerating his actions to seem that way. Either way, I didn't care. And because of that, the joke would be on him if he was lying. He ordered a 6-inch sandwich, and I told him to make it a foot long if he hadn't eaten in so long. He almost broke down again but snapped out of it, and changed his order.

He added chips and a drink to it, but only after I insisted. Further taking away the idea that this was all a scam to get free food. He picked his sandwich and drink up and looked like he was ready to walk out. "Do you mind if I eat with you?" he asked me. I was taken aback. Most of the time when I had bought someone lunch over the years they either doubled their order, left as soon as it was ready, or both. "Uh...Yeah, man. Sure." I told him.

We went and sat down and he thanked me again frantically for the food. Then he pulled the sandwich out and started literally scarfing it down in front of me. And I mean scarfing. And for a brief moment, I thought to myself "Who eats like that?" until it clicked in my head that only someone who hadn't eaten a meal in a long time would... I immediately felt horrible. "How long has it been?" I asked. "Um...Been a few days. Maybe Saturday?" It was Tuesday.

"I'm sorry, my brother. I didn't realize how bad it was." I told him as tears burned in my eyes burning my nostrils as I was overcome with emotion. He told me he understood, and I did more than anyone else did for him. I explained my stance on doing the good for the good and he told me again he would pay me back. "No, my brother. I never expected you to. That's the whole point. His eyes welled up more than they had before as he kept eating.

"My wife left us..." he said. "us?" I asked seeing what I was assuming was his wedding ring on his necklace and worrying about his answer. "Yeah, me and my little boy. She left us, and went to Louisiana." (I believe) he told me. "She took almost everything with her leaving me broke, and without any way to provide for my son." He took another bite and continued. "I just started this job, and it pays good. But I ain't gonna see a dime until next Thursday."

I asked him when the last time his son ate was, and he told me he had been going without so he could feed his son. I believe he said he could only afford ramen and hot dog weiners and was making his son that. I had always wanted to be a dad and I didn't really have the best examples growing up. At that time I was questioning ability to be a father.

Kandace and I were either planning to or trying to conceive, at the time and all I could think was being in a situation where I couldn't afford to take care of my son and what that must be doing to him. Much less foregoing food for himself to do what little he could. Thinking about it now as a father makes the emotion so much worse but at that moment it nearly broke my heart.

He didn't ask me for money. He told me he was going to find a way to get some groceries. That he didn't have anything to sell, but he would find a way. He nearly finished his entire sandwich by that time, and I asked why he was eating so quickly. He told me he had spent 30 minutes of his 60-minute lunch break asking people outside to buy him lunch so he didn't black out at work with no food.

In that moment...I had had enough. I wasn't going to put up with a situation like that that I had the power to change. I packed the rest of my sandwich up to take to work and said. "My brother. I know you don't have much time left but can you follow me to the Grocery store real quick?" He said "uh..sure" unsure of why I would ask him that. He followed me over to the ATM directly inside and upon realizing where we were said "I...No, my brother. You've already helped me enough."

"My brother..." I told him. "I don't trust these humans out here to help you, and I'm not going to let a hard-working single father and his son starve. It's just not going to happen." He started actually crying at that point and I did all I could not to do the same. I pulled out what I could afford to give him.

The number is not important, and I can't remember anyway, but it's not as much as I wanted to give him. I told him that I hoped what I gave him would get him through to payday and he hugged me (After asking.) I told him they would be ok and that we was an amazing father to sacrifice for his son like he had. The kind of father many kids unfortunately never had. I knew he needed to hear that and I'm glad I said it.

He kept trying to tell me he wanted to pay me back. And in the end, I finally told him how he could. "When you are on your feet and can afford to. Find someone who needs help like you did, and help them." I said. "That's what I'm doing now, and that's why I'm doing it. I continued.

As an Autistic adult, I came from a place where nobody would hire me, and no matter what I tried to make money, I fell flat on my face. I have been plagued with bad luck most of my life and have often felt cursed, so when I finally get on my feet and out of the bad times and see someone struggling to do the same just like I did, my first thought isn't to judge them or tell them to pull themselves up. It's to help them up.

He was a single dad with a new job trying to do right by his son. He was pulling himself up. But he needed help. Sometimes when people help themselves up, they still need a hand. And in a world of apathetic "not my problem" attitudes. Be that hand. Be that hand in spite of the judgmental onlookers, and naysayers. Yes. Guard yourself against being used, and abused but do what you can afford to do to help make their world, and by extension the rest of the world a better place.

And wherever you are, my brother, if you are by some random happenstance reading this. I hope you and yours are as well as me and mine. Thank you for being a shining example of fatherhood in a time where I was questioning my ability to be one.

-Nathan Alan McConnell

---

Hell me make more content more often at PAYPAL.ME/GROWINGUPASPIE and PATREON.COM/IRISHWOLFPRODUCTIONS

[r3b3lgrrrrrrrl]

A LunaTic and her Gunn (Part 28)

"A little Hate-Fucking Never Hurt No One"

@creatureofthen1ght-v3

@lovemythsworld

Finally off of the plane, Luna and Opie embrace. She thanks him for coming out to help her and tells him to kiss the kids for her. He replies to her that is was no problem, that his door is still, always open and to get her ass back to Charmimg soon. They hug again as tightly as Luna can stand before he reminds her to take care of her wound.

She hugs and thanks Happy as Jackson lingers in the background waiting his turn.

"Luna..." He says opening his arms. It's been an emotional couple of days and she lets herself fall into his hug. They hold each other for a long time. "I love you." Jackson tells Luna, kissing the top of her head.

Sighing, she tells him. "I'll always love you, Jackson." With her face on his chest, closing her eyes to stop the tears.

He pushes away from her to cradle her face in his hands. "Bad timing, hunh?" He says as she opens her eyes, looking up into his sad ones.

"Bad timing." She agrees as a tear drops. He wipes it away with his thumb before pulling her close to him.

She closes her eyes again and stiffens up. "Please don't kiss me, Jax." As she opens her eyes to look at him, he watches the tears roll. He kisses her on the forehead instead. After getting on his bike, he takes a long look at her. She smiles at him weakly, stretching her 5 fingers out. He smiles back before he leaves her.

Luna bursts into tears as Jackson rides off. She's crying hard. It had been a lot. Between fighting with Colson, the flying back and forth, knowing what Marissa is facing, rehashing old shit with Jackson, getting shot, leaving home again AND still not talking to Colson through it all. Luna's incredibly overwhelmed. So much, that she cries all the way back to Ashley's house. Thinking "Because I don't even have a home." Making her cry harder.

********************************************

As Jackson rides off he thinks only of Luna.

"Fuck. She fucking as gorgeous as ever. I can't believe I fucked that up." He thinks, his mind rolling back over the years. How he had grown up with Luna, looking forward to each summer when she came. He smiles thinking about the trouble they caused, driving Gemma nuts. His heart hurts, remembering her laugh the first time he showed her how to fire a gun. How she rang happily in his ears instead, after it kicked her back into his arms. What it was like for a younger her to smile from underneath him.

He feels his eyes well up as he remembers the moment he broke her heart. Tara had ended up leaving but by then Luna had met Justin and stopped coming for the summers. They stayed in touch and Tara came back, only to leave him again shortly after Justin's funeral.

Jackson's body longs for Luna on the back of his bike. Another sharp pain hits his heart, as he thinks about the week that she popped up at his house, a little over a year ago. How the sun hit her hair when he opened his front door, surprised but happy to find her there. They had fallen right back into step with each other, The Club even using her on a job. He laughs thinking about that night. How excited she had been when they ditched the van, blue eyes beaming with that ring around them like the sun.

His dick hardens as he can't help but drift back to kissing her after. How she felt in his mouth and in his arms. Like finding home. They had gone back to his house, made out all night, laughing and cuddling, sharing a bottle of whiskey on the floor. He hadn't even minded that they didn't have sex, it was good to just sleep with her. Then, the next morning she was gone. He was alone.

His heart aches. He had believed her in the letter she left him. That she still missed Justin and she was sorry for hurting him. That she would love him always and never regret their time. A tear drops as he still believes that today. Not regretting his relationship with Tara but having Luna leave a giant hole. "Bad timing." He says out loud into the wind. Only letting his engine hear him cry.

-------------------------------------------------

Luna's miserable. So, it pleases her that no one is at Ashley's. She takes a shower and redresses her wound. Finally looking at her phone, she sees Colson Snapped her. It's him asking for a truce.

"He's a fucking asshole." She thinks still angry at the way he treated her. She knows he was partially right about the Jax thing and isn't looking forward to telling him about it. It doesn't change how he acted though.

Her head and shoulder hurt as she Snaps him back, before climbing into bed to smoke a joint and rest.

-------------------------------------------------

Colson opens Luna's Snap. It's of a bed, he thinks it's Ashley's guestroom, with the caption "Here till further notice."

He Snaps her back a guilty looking selfie, asking to come over.

"If you can NOT be an Asshole. The door'll be open. I'll be in my room." She tells him in a video.

"Fuck, she is NOT happy with me." He thinks before getting ready to head over over to Ashley's

--------------------------------------------------

Colson locks the door behind him before going upstairs to find Luna. She sleeping. Naked to his delight. He pulls his joggers off, sliding in behind her. As he pulls her close, she wakes up wincing in pain "What the fuuuccckk??" She cries out, pulling away from him.

"What's wrong!?" He asks alarmed. Then he sees her bandaged shoulder. "What the FUCK, LUNA??" He asks her intensely, eyebrows furrowed.

Her head still hurts. Sighing, she looks at him and asks "Are you gonna be a fucking Asshole? Because I can be a fucking Asshole too." He looks at her like she's crazy, she takes this as a challenge. "You'd KNOW 'What the fuck?' if you answered your fucking phone." She snakes her head and a chipped nail at him. Gel manicures don't hold up through everything.

"I'm sorry, Kitten" He says sheepishly, looking down.

She softens and squeezes his thigh causing him to look at her. "I missed you, Bunny." She says lifting up slightly for a kiss. He meets her, sliding his hand through her hair, holding the back of her skull, kissing her warmly and sweetly. His touch and kiss make everything melt away to her. Forehead to forehead, after the kiss "Get on the other side and I'll tell you everything." She says.

She lights a joint as he hops over to her right side, so she can lay on him. She first tells him Jackson was there. Colson lifts his head up displeased, looking down at her. "We'll talk about that." She says giving him an equally unhappy look. In the middle of telling him about Marissa and her kids, he interrupts her.

"He gave you a fucking gun?" Colson asks sitting up quickly, hitting Luna's shoulder.

"Ah!" She winces, sitting up too. "Yes. Yes, he did. And I'd probably be fucking dead if he didn't." Her shoulder hurts and she's pissy. She slides out of bed, grabbing a 30 and a bar. She asks Colson if he wants any, he takes a 30. Climbing back into bed, she sparks another joint, finishing her story.

"I can't believe they fucking shot you! Are you ok?" He asks concerned, hand resting one his forehead, the other rubbing her back. He kisses her cheek, tying to hide his irritation with Jackson.

"I'm fine. Shit happens." She one shoulder shrugs. "What happened to YOU, last night?" She asks pointedly.

Still rubbing her bare back, he rubs the back of his head with his other hand. "I went out with Mod and acted like an Asshole..." He starts before telling her how he really doesn't remember much, he's not sure if he got thrown out of Sound or not and how he woke up on Ashleigh's couch. He doesn't know how to tell her he didn't hook up with anyone.

She asks him flat out. "I need to get you tested again?"

"No. Mod said I was dancing on bitches but would hand palm 'em when they got to close." Smirking at her while he places his hand easily over her whole face. "Hulk style." She shakes him loose, feeling relieved and guilty.

"Jackson tried to kiss me." Luna tells Colson bluntly.

"WHAT THE FUCK!! I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL HIM!!" Colson shouts.

Trying to keep calm, she tells him the keyword being 'tried' and that what was important was she didn't kiss him back.

"This is fucking bullshit, he's gonna get fucked up." Colson says sparking another joint.

"Why??? Bc I can't She-Hulk palm motherfuckers??" Her anger flares up. "Should I go to Sound tonight and whoop ever bitches ass in that motherfucker?? Because we did the SAME fucking thing. The only difference is I wasn't leading any one the fuck on and was still fucking calling YOU!" She's right and she's hype. "So, why didn't you answer me?" She asks him.

"Because I didn't wanna hear you with your ex." He snaps throws his hands up.

"That's dumb." She says "That's like me saying you can't be around Emma."

"EMMA DOESN'T TRY TO GET WITH ME!" He jumps out of the bed. Puffing on the joint.

"JACKSON COULDN'T GET WITH ME WHEN HE FUCKING TRIED!!" She screams back, naked body now standing on the bed.

"I DON'T like that every guy wants to fuck you." He states, setting the joint in an ashtray.

"It happens!! I don't like that bitches wanna fuck YOU. But we're not fucking THEM!! We're fucking each other. RIGHT!" She demands making his dick grow hard.

"Right!" He replies, grabbing her quickly by the hips and neck, pulling her in, kissing her hard. Kissing him back harder, wrapping her legs around him, she pulls him off of her by the hair.

"You HAVE to answer my fucking phone calls, Asshole." She demands as he sucks all over her neck and naked body.

"STOP getting shot with Ex fucking boyfriends, Bitch." He tells her, throwing her on the bed. She winces in pain but neither care as he grabs her by the ankle, dragging her down the bed towards him. He looks into her eyes and bites the side of her foot. Then he flips her over on her stomach, scooping her waist up with one arm, bringing her ass to him. "STOP getting shot period!"❗SLAP❗ His palm hits her ass hard. She yelps. He grabs her hips and pushes himself into her even harder. Like in-IN. It hurts until she positions herself. Once he's in, she rides his dick he's in trouble.

She slams back against him "FUCK ME. Don't FIGHT ME before I leave fucking town!!" She cries out. He pulls her hair back, he can feel them both about to cum.

"I'm gonna fuck you so hard you can't LEAVE FUCKING TOWN!!" He theatens. Slamming back into her harder.

Bucking against him angrily, she screams out "YOU FUCKING BETTTER!!" Making them both cum. They collapse on the bed on top of each other, tired and emotionally spent. "Watch my shoulder, Bunny." She says in a softer voice.

"Oh, sorry, Kitten!!" He says lifting up quickly but still staying inside of her. He kisses her bare back before carefully laying his face down again. "I fucking love you." He sighs.

"I fucking love-LOVE you." She tells him back, making him smile. They lay like that for a while, catching their breath, hearts syncing up before they climb to the top of the bed together.

"You're a maniac." She says

"Ok, you're insane." He tells her back.

This makes her smile. "You like my song?" She asks.

"I DO!" He beams, carefully wrapping his arms around her, sprinkling her face in kisses. "My little Brooklyn Bitch." She snuggles in closer to him.

"I fucking missed you." She tells him.

"Me too." He says inhaling her, happy she's home.

"Hate fucking is AWESOME." She giggles.

"You're an idiot."

"Your idiot." She replies. They both laugh. Talking a bit more and finish the joint before contently drifting off to sleep together.

------------------------------------------------

To be continued....

[theumbrellaacademytickle]

Little Klaus (1)

In which Klaus is somehow deaged and the siblings take advantage of this. Also Ben's alive BC fuck you he ain't dead in my books.

When Klaus woke up he didn't notice anything different. He didn't feel different, look different or act different.

So why is it that when he went downstairs to line up for lunch (as usual) there were five strange adults in the living room?

This lead Klaus to where he was now, backed against the door he entered by and staring at the adults, who seemed to be staring at him.

"W-who are you people?" He said, cursing himself mentally for stuttering over the first word, "What are you doing here?"

"Is anyone else seeing a baby Klaus?" The Asian man muttered, eyes flicking disbelievingly between the other adults and Klaus's own.

Klaus stepped back again, "H-how do you know my name?! Where's my siblings!?" Panic had begun to rise in his chest, and he slowly started to open the door behind him, inch by agonizing inch.

"What are we supposed to do?" A man clad in leather asked, ignoring Klaus's questions, "He clearly has no clue what's going on!"

"Klaus," a smaller woman asked, getting down onto her knees (not that it was necessary, Klaus was sure he wasn't that much shorter than her), "we aren't here to hurt you, I promise. Can you tell me what year it is?"

Green eyes flicking from each adult with panic, he answered hesitantly, "2001, why?"

A rush of hushed whispers filled the room at his answer, but Klaus had finally opened the door to an amount he could slip out of and he wasn't planning on overstaying his welcome. The 12 year old flew out of the room, taking off his clunky shoes as he ran (they were slowing him down) and running barefooted throughout the mansion.

"Come on," he muttered, panicked tears pricking at his eyes, "the others have to be somewhere!"

Hearing the yells of the adults behind him only made him panic more, and he ran over the polished wooden floors, skidding and slipping as he went but never once staying in the same place for a second. As he was heading towards the bedrooms (he was sure if his siblings were anywhere they'd be there, heading down for breakfast) he ran straight into Five. The two collided and fell to the ground, rubbing their heads before clocking each existence. Five's brow furrowed in confusion before Klaus grabbed him and shoved him into the ex-junkies room, and he shoved a chair against the door in a pitiful attempt at a barricade. Still confused, Five spoke up.

"Klaus?"

Klaus's face crumpled, and he flung himself at the 13 year old (who to be frank didn't look much different at 12). "Five," he breathed out in a panicked voice, "I-I can't find the others! Diego and Vanya, even Luther is missing! And dad isn't anywhere to be found! All I found were five adults downstairs, and I don't know who they are. I'm so glad you're ok!" His eyes had filled with tears and he buried his face into Five's neck.

"Klaus," Five asked gently, putting his arms awkwardly around the pre-teen, "W-what year is it?"

"2001, but what does it have to do with anything?"

***le time skip before this gets super long***

"So, let me get this straight," Klaus stated, "The year is 2019, these people are obviously our siblings judging by the tattoos and what I'm assuming is Vanya's lack of one, and you are in the body of a 13 year old because you travelled forward in time to prevent the apocalypse and it did some weird doolally kinda space stuff and left you like that?"

Raising his eyebrows at the choice of words, Five simply said, "Yes."

"Huh. Ok. Then why am I twelve instead of..." He paused to count on his fingers, "30? Holy hell!" His eyes widened comically, "You guys are really really old!"

Laughing gently, Ben responded, "We don't know Klaus."

"I should assume that it's something to do with the space-time continuum being messed up," Five murmured absently to himself, "but with the timeline being as fragile as it is right now I am exceedingly reluctant to mess about with it some more."

"Wait," Klaus cried, "Are you saying that I'm gonna be stuck as the youngest sibling now??!!"

"Oh, this is priceless!" Diego crowed, a large grin on his face, "Who'd have thought large beansprout Klaus would end up being the baby?"

"Oi!" The pre-teen shouted, pouting, "I'm not a baby at all!"

"You sure look like one," the leather clad man teased, and Allison huffed out a laugh, thwacking him on the head.

"Behave, you idiot," she admonished, "it's gotta be scary being stuck in that situation. It could just as easily be you."

"So," Five started, "if Klaus is going to be stuck like this for the moment, unless it doesn't wear off in which case it's permanent, I think we should try and let him get to know us and start to live a normal life."

"TRUTH OR DARE!" Klaus screamed in excitement, already running to the living room to plop himself on a couch, "SCHNELL SCHNELL!"

***another time skip Yeet***

Eventually everyone was sat in the living room (Five and Luther may have needed a little bit of coaching to get them there) and Klaus grinned widely in glee.

"Youngest to oldest, so me then Five, then in numerical order we can go Vanya, Ben, Allison, Diego and Luther!" He crowed in excitement, before turning to Five (who was quietly drinking his coffee).

"Five, truth or dare?"

Thinking for a moment, Five responded, "Dare."

"I dare you..." Klaus pondered, before pouting cutely, "I can't think of anything."

Ben leaned over and whispered into his ear, and Klaus perked up significantly, "I dare you to sit in Allison's lap for the rest of the game!"

Unable to stay mad at the seance's adorable excitement, Five grumbled good-naturedly as Allison pulled him into her lap. Five quickly turned to Ben, eager to get the attention off himself.

"Ben, truth or dare?"

"I'm gonna be boring and go with truth."

"You never know what music's on the radio now, so I have to ask, what is it that you're always listening to in your headphones?"

Laughing shyly, Ben answered, "It's... It's Kpop. Korean pop. I don't know how I got into it, I think big you introduced me to it Klaus," he laughed, getting the youngest's attention.

"Really, who's my favourite groups?"

"Well, you thirst over Jungkook from BTS," Ben teased, watching Klaus turn crimson, "but your favourite groups at the moment are BLACKPINK and Hellovenus."

"Can you show me them after we're done?"

"Sure." Ben turned to Vanya, "I think Five just wanted to ask me that question and forgot the order haha, so Vanya truth or dare?"

"Hmm... Dare."

"I dare you to pick an outfit out of big Klaus's wardrobe and wear it all day!"

Laughing incredulously, Vanya made her way to Klaus's bedroom. 5 minutes later, she came down in a pair of tight leather shorts, mesh top with a loose crop top (with the word GAY in pink on black) over the top of it, and a bright pink feather boa. "Look at this madness!" She laughed in delight, shimmying over to Klaus who was giggling non-stop. She took the feather boa off and hooked it around his skinny torso, and Klaus burst into belly laughter as she shimmied it closer towards her.

"Vanya," he laughed, "Stop it! It tickles!!"

"Oh does it really?" She smiled, "Couldn't tell, truly!"

While trying to escape the feather boa, Klaus hadn't noticed Diego sneaking up behind him and lifting him up.

"You seriously thought we'd forget how ticklish little you was? Shame on you Klaus!" The leather clad man laughed as Klaus kicked his bare feet.

"No, please don't tickle me!" He giggled nervously as Vanya stepped towards him, wiggling her fingers menacingly.

"Sorry, what's that? I couldn't make it out between the giggles," she teased, and as Klaus opened his mouth to speak again she started tickling his armpits.

Klaus instantly began giggling, kicking his legs in the air in a weak protest against the tickling. He had always been weak and frail against his siblings, the slightly too skinny one, the one who was sensitive. His protesting was half hearted as his mouth spewed out bubbly giggles.

"Nohohoho fair! Vanyahahahaha plehehehehease!!!"

"It has been too long since we tickled him," Allison laughed, Five still on her lap. The teen was looking at the scene in front of him, a rare fond smile on his face.

"Why don't you join in?" Diego laughed, "Luther take the baby from me."

At Allison's squeal of delight, Luther grabbed the kid by the wrists, sitting the underweight preteen across his lap (image BC this is a strange thing to describe???)

He grabbed the boys skinny wrists and carefully lifted them over his head, pinning them with one large hand against the couch. Knowing he was completely exposed, Klaus just laid there, bursting out into squeaky giggles as Allison went straight for his sides.

"So cute~~" The woman cooed as Klaus helplessly kicked his little feet, struggling to pull down his arms.

"Allisohohohon!! Stahahahahap!"

"Oh no, sweetheart, we're only just beginning!" She grinned, and lifted his shirt up. Klaus began to giggle apprehensively, chanting no's under his breath.

"Oh yes," Allison grinned teasingly, "I remember squeaky toy Klaus, don't the rest of you?"

A manicured nail poked the inside of Klaus's bellybutton, and he let out a squeak. His face flushed red at the adoring coos from his siblings, but he didn't have time to retaliate because Allison lightly scribbled her fingers across his flat stomach, causing him to burst once more into giggly laughter. Eventually, when the woman was done and Luther let him go, Klaus curled up in her lap, giggling cutely as she lightly rubbed his stomach.

"That feel good, Klaus?"

A sleepy nod confirmed her statement, and Allison grinned widely.

"There's not long left, baby, wanna see the game through?"

The final three finally took their turn. Allison had chosen truth, and was told to pick the current cutest UA member (Klaus was an easy win), Luther chose dare and was dared to hang upside down on the railing reciting the entirety of Eminem's Rap God while Klaus was dared to have his bellybutton (his well-known weakest spot) tickled for five minutes non stop. However, at the end of the game, with a giggly little baby Klaus still snuggling into her lap ready to fall asleep, Allison was excited to see how long this would last.

[rambleonwithrosie]

150 Followers. Feel free to take this and use it yourself.

Okay so if you've been following me you know that at every milestone of 50 I go and answer 50 questions. So this time they're all gonna be Queen/Classic Rock specific and y'all are all welcome to take these and make asks out of them or reblog/copy with your own answers.

Favorite Queen member's solo album? Strange Frontier by Roger Taylor

Who of the band would you call to help you fix a flat tire? John, he's a dad and a diy guy, as much as I wanna say Rog I just don't want to deal with a drama queen when I'm having my own drama but I've seen him under the hood of a car so I've no doubt he probably knows how

What do you think Brian May smells like on am average day? Very woodsy, like pine needles and some light but expensive cologne

How would you kiss Freddie? On the cheek like a good friend I just can't get into his looks enough to think about kissing him any other way

How would you kiss John? Well if we're talking long haired fluffy John I'd probably psst at him to come around the corner and then give him a kiss and see what he does

How would you kiss Brian? Very carefully otherwise @squeezemylemon is gonna kill me so probably the sweet quick chaste type kiss

How would you kiss Roger? (My moment has come) I would walk up to him and grab ahold of one of the necklaces he wears and just pull his lips down to mine and crash mine onto his wrapping my arms around his neck kissing him for all I'm worth or less dramatically if we were just sitting on a couch or something I'd just lean my head up off his shoulder and press a gentler sort of kiss to his lips and see where he takes it after that

If you were going to date one of their kids who would it be? Felix, I'm partial to brunettes usually (Roger and Luke Skywalker are my exceptions) and he seems pretty cool and has done a lot of different things which would be interesting to talk about

Favorite gif of your least favorite band member?

10. Most recent Queen photo on your phone

11. Favorite piece of fanart?

I can't pick just one. I also don't remember where I found these and if you know the artist I'll happily tag them in the most. The artbis most definitely NOT mine

This is mine

12. Queen song that makes you want to cry? Love of My Life

13. Which band member would you pick to keep an eye on you at a party so you don't get too crazy and make it home safe? Brian probably, I would say John but I feel if he's drinking he'd be less than no help

14. Who's flat would you ask to crash at? I have reasons to want to say Roger's but banging aside I'd probably pick Freddie he was generous and funny and would probably do his beat to cheer me up from whatever circumstance had made me not have a place of my own to stay

15. Who would you want to teach you to play an instrument they play? Well I genuinely feel I'm best suited for drums so I'm not just saying Roger because he's my dude. Plus he could teach me the most instruments anyways considering as he knows drums, bass, electric, and keyboard.

16. If you could spend a day with Freddie what would you do? I'd just want to sit and have tea and talk and maybe go shopping later hear his advice and crack some jokes

17. Favorite solo song by a Queen band member? As far as written by goes, it's probably Let's Get Crazy or Happiness by Rog bit overall it's gotta be Rog's version of Racing in the Street *chills*

18. Favorite live performance?

19. Whose singing voice do you like best? Roger Taylor (nothing against Fresh he's amazing)

20. Whose speaking voice do you like best? Again Roger Meddows Taylor for the win

21. Write a snippet where you're holding hands with your least favorite band member.

Freddie had never been to an amusement park before, hadn't wanted to go really, but John had begged him to come along and then left him with Aston to babysit while he dealt with his actual children. It wasn't that she had anything against Fred it's just him tagging along on her elbow was keeping her away from the drummer whose attention she wanted. They got onto one of the rides and she saw how pale Freddie was looking and felt sorry for him. It wasn't his fault that he was being a third wheel or that the drummer was off on one of the more dangerous rides that Freddie was not about to get on.

"You can hold my hand if you want" Aston joked looking over at Fred.

"Really?" He asked a little relieved. The two of them chuckled and to Aston's surprise Freddie's black nail polished fingertips interlaced through hers and he looked a little more at ease for the comfort of human contact.

"It'll be fine" she grinned and then the ride took off and the black fingernails damn near dug into her hand in panic.

22. Write a snippet where you're fighting with your favorite band member.

They had been living together for just over two months and despite not knowing how to boil an egg Roger somehow found a way to get into the kitchen and put things in the wrong spot. He came home from the stall.

"Where is the paprika?" She leveled at him before he had scarcely shut the door.

"The what?"

"Paprika, Rog, the spice that I was going to use for the supper I was cooking us, but I can't ever find anything in this kitchen" Aston said muttering as an afterthought "thanks to you."

"What was that?" Rog said coming over to her and looking darkly with his blue eyes.

"Just tell me where you put the paprika and we'll be fine" she sighed.

"I didn't fucking touch anything in your stupid kitchen" he glowered going to the liquor cabinet.

"Well I still can't find it" she huffed.

"Not my problem" he said swigging straight from the bottle.

"Well if you want dinner it kind of is" she retorted.

"I'll get something out" Rog said dispassionately.

"Fuck you" she muttered and went back to banging through the cabinets in search of the missing spice. She was on her knees with half her body in a lower shelf looking in the back and growing hotter for Roger showing no signs of caring or helping. She smelt the dish starting to burn on the stove and tried to crawl out, raising her head up and whacking it on the shelf above. She let out a round of oaths.

She went over to the stove and moved it off the heat halfway between tears and screaming.

"I'll order something" Roger said standing up.

"I can fucking cook!" She shouted "if only I could find the things I need when I need them."

"Well don't yell at me about it" Roger said and brushed past and out the door.

Aston collapsed onto the floor sitting with her back to the cabinets and started crying. She sobbed into the kitchen towel. So much for her cosy dinner at home with Rog. She was so distraught that she didn't hear the door open and close. She felt her fingers clutching the towel pried open and looked to see a bottle of paprika put into them. She turned her teary red eyes up to Roger's face. He pulled her to her feet and held her in his arms. Softly stroking her hair and planting a gentle kiss to her cheeks.

"Come on, I got us reservations, you can cook your thing tomorrow if you still want to" he looked down at her smiling and put a kiss to her nose and grinned at her in his arms.

23. Favorite picture of Brian

24. Favorite picture Roger

(Well it's one of many favs)

25. Favorite picture of Freddie

26. Favorite picture of John

27. Best song to slow dance to? One Year of Love

28. Best song to make out to? I'm In Love with My Car

29. Best song to drive to? Breakthru or Don't Stop Me Now

30. Best song to strip to? Tear It Up

31. What era of the band would you like to hang out with most? I wanna say mid to late 70s. I'd rather not have to hang out with them during Hot Space 😂

32. Favorite song on your favorite album? Rock It (Prime Jive)

33. Least liked song on your favorite album? Probably Play the Game

34. Who would you want to take care of you if you were sick? I feel Brian would be the most knowledgeable but I'd probably prefer Fred just cutting up and maybe grabbing the aspirins and whatever else was needed. I just don't feel Brian would be funny enough to cheer me up. And Rog I just don't know how good he'd be at taking care of someone

35. Who would you want to go driving with? Roger. Duh! So many reasons!

36. Who would you pick to spend a lazy (non-sexual) afternoon with? Well not that I'm just into Rog for the sex, he'd still be my first pick because laughs. But second would be Brian.

37. Rate how thirsty you are for each band member? Freddie 0/10. John variable between 0/10-6/10. Brian 2/10-4/10(red special is factored into Brian). Roger 1000/10 (cars aren't factored into Rog otherwise I'd break my phone adding zeros to that 1000)

38. Least favorite Roger song? Sheer Heart Attack

39. Favorite Brian song? Sail Away Sweet Sister or Dragon Attack

40. Least favorite Freddie song? Body Language and Get Down Make Love

41. Favorite John song? One Year of Love or If You Can't Beat Them

42. Are you excited for the Bohemian Rhapsody movie? Yes. Not insanely. But moderately excited yes

43. Is Queen your favorite band of all time? No. They're in my top 3 but The Moody Blues were my childhood and are so unique and very special to me

44. If you married your crush from the band where would you go on your honeymoon? The beach. Hopefully the Pacific Ocean. Probably some nice private beach just to have space with each other and I love water and he loves boating and stuff.

45. Who has the nicest butt? While I prefer Rog's ass I must admit John possesses the superior booty

46. Who has the best smile? Roger. Hands down and not just because he's my main man all around it's literally made of sunshine

47. Who would you go to if you were scared? Roger. I don't get scared so if I did I'd want someone around to make me laugh my fears away

48. If you were going to be in a crime fighting/super hero duo with one of the band, who would it be? John. He's sound and sensible and so long as he can handle my forceful personality and not write any DISpatches raking my bad behavior and rash decisions we'll get along

49. Do you listen to Queen daily, or at least multiple times a week? Yes especially if you include their solo works

50. Have you written any Queen fanfiction or made any fanart? Yes. Fanfiction galore. Some has yet to be posted but when I do it will be on @drummerinthecupboard

[emberdune]

Hello! 23, 26 and 49 please 😘

hewwo!

23. how do you feel about chilly weather?

hell yes bring it on. i love 🌶 weather. in high school i used to take these walks in just a button-down shirt in like icy january or something because all my buddies would go out for a smoke break and i'd tag along and i loved the feeling of the cold air on my skin. (they'd always chastise me telling you're gonna fucking get pneumonia put something on ffs) but yeah i basically grew up in -30°C so anything goes tbh. i have not however tried the plunging into ice water thing that russians do. that one does scare me a bit but maybe some day?

26. a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?

i wonder if this means like a daydream thing ? hmmmmm now i wouldn't go around posting that sort of thing for the world to see now, would i ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ok i'm kidding i can't actually think of anything atm. hmmmm. maybe. maybe sometimes i do imagine playing portal 2 co-op mode with someone before i leave this mortal coil. there's supposed to be this really funny scene at the end with glados and some crow hatchlings and she's like oh you murderous monster babies i love you so much or whatever but i've never actually played it so i don't know? i would like to see that happen??? are you kidding me? glados ? and crows? what else could you ask for???

49. can you skip rocks?

i can make a rock bounce two or three times usually. it's all about finding a nice round and flat rock and throwing it at exactly the right angle. maybe a few more times on a stiller and larger body of water ? the river i lived near to wasn't that wide. though the last time i tried was probably more than fifteen years ago sooo... but some of the people i was around growing up could make them skip like ten fifteen times and even all the way across the river it was wild so i always felt like a wimp lmao