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endless-summer-soldier · 8 months ago

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dr. feelgood - chapter eleven

pairing: Surgeon!Bucky x SurgicalIntern!Reader

summary: Y/N has a one night stand with a handsome stranger the night before starting her new job as a surgical intern. Little does she know, the handsome stranger also happens to be her new boss

warnings: must be 18+, drinking, some surgery descriptions, smut, self-pleasure, praise kink, oral sex, unprotected sex, rough sex, PTSD, choking, angst

word count: 3.9k

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It was the morning from hell. I knew the moment I got in my car that it was not going to be a good day, and that turned out to be the case before I even made it into work. Now I was riding to the hospital in an ambulance, straddling a stranger and performing CPR.

“We’re about a minute out,” the EMT who was driving the vehicle called.

“Page Barnes,” I replied, as I counted out my chest compressions. The EMTs were adamant that they could handle the patient, but I wasn’t leaving his side and I was determined to keep him alive. I heard the doors to the ambulance open and the EMTs carefully unloaded the gurney keeping it as smooth as possible for me to work.

“What the hell…Y/N?” I heard. It was the first time he had spoken to me in weeks.

“Male in his forties, partially deaf. He was walking in a crosswalk and was hit head on by a car. He’s got a broken femur and has been in and out of consciousness with a really weak pulse.”

Bucky turned to the interns and said, “Take over for Y/L/N and get him to CT.”

One of the interns came over to the patient’s side to take my place and I replied, “I’ve got it.”

“Y/N, you’re bleeding,” Bucky stated firmly.

I turned toward him, “I’m fine,” I argued.

“You need to be examined.”

“Bucky,” I pleaded. He just shook his head and held out his hand. I knew arguing was no use, he could easily pull me down and I didn’t need a reminder of what it felt like to be in his arms. I climbed toward the side and took his hand as I jumped down.

“Go take an empty bed, I’ll send someone in to check on you.”

“I’m fine, I don’t need-”

“Let’s make sure, okay?” His eyes were full of concern, and I didn’t have it in me to argue with him, even if I disagreed. I nodded and he moved with the gurney into the pit.

“Buck?” I called before he could get too far. He stopped and turned back towards me. “Please don’t let him die.”

“He’s not going anywhere. I promise.” Bucky ran to catch up with his team. I thanked the EMTs and then found an empty station in the ER where I waited and hoped for the best..

I wasn’t sure how much time had passed since our arrival, but eventually Dr. Wilson came by.

“Hey there, Wonder Woman,” Sam said, approaching the bed I was sitting on.

“Wonder Woman?” I replied.

“Oh that’s what they’re calling you now.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re a hero. And a badass.”

I scoffed, “I was in the right place at the right time.”

“Yet you still managed to get scratched up,” he put on a pair of gloves. “What happened?”

I sighed, “I was driving to work and came to a stop at a redlight. The car next to me was looking to the left to make a right turn and accelerated, not seeing the pedestrian in the crosswalk. Clint, he’s the guy who got hit, he’s partially deaf and didn’t hear the car coming. The guy hit the accelerator pretty hard and didn’t break until he saw Clint hit the windshield.”

“That doesn’t explain how you got glass in your forehead.”

“I pulled over to the right to help out and the guy who started the accident backed up and hit my car.”

“Jesus. Was he drunk?”

“I don’t know, I didn’t really talk to him.”

“So what did you do?”

“I yelled for someone to call 911 and started to examine Clint. At first he was in shock, but he was responsive. So I asked him his name and about his job and his life to calm him down. He probably has a concussion. He kept losing consciousness and his pulse was really weak so they need to look at his heart too.”

“He’s already been taken in for scans.”

“Is he stable?”

“He’s stable.”

I eased at that, feeling better already.

“Now sit still. I’m going to pull out this glass from your forehead. Then I’ll clean out the lacerations and stitch you up.”

Sam started pulling out small pieces of crushed glass and placed them into a bowl. All the shards were pretty small, but it was still painful. I tried to keep the wincing to a minimum but it wasn’t comfortable. Talking seemed like a good way to keep me distracted from the pain.

“So they sent the head of plastics to come tend to a couple scrapes on my forehead.”

Sam chuckled, “Bucky wanted to do it himself but I wouldn’t let him. You would’ve ended up with two big scars on your pretty little forehead.”

I let out a small smile, “Yeah I don’t think his talents would be best served stitching me up.”

“Stitching? You know that man doesn’t do sutures; you would’ve been glued back together.”

I let out a hearty laugh, knowing Sam was correct. He added, “He wanted the best for you, which is why I volunteered. Told him I’d give you the VIP treatment.”

I sighed, “Just stitch me up so I can go help.”

“I’m sending you to CT after this.”

“What!?”

“You were in a car accident, Y/N. I’d be a bad doctor if I didn’t order you a head CT.”

“I don’t have any symptoms!”

“You’re also running on adrenaline. Just get the scans done and we’ll figure out next steps from there”

“Fine.” I was getting used to not getting my way today.

“Sit tight for now. We’ll have someone take you to get your scans shortly.”

“Dr. Barnes, Clint’s back from CT. He seems much more stable now. Dr. Rogers is in there examining his femur,” one of the interns provided him an update. He thanked him and headed back to Clint’s room. Sure enough, Steve was in there, examining the break in his leg and studying the chart. Bucky knocked on the open door before walking through to his patient.

“Mind if I interrupt?” he said.

“Not at all,” Steve said.

“Hi Clint. I’m Dr. Barnes. I'm head of the trauma team and I’ve been overseeing your care since you got here.”

“How am I looking, doc?”

“You’re doing really well. Dr. Rogers here is going to take you into surgery to repair your femur. You have a little bit of internal bleeding that we’re gonna fix up while you’re in there. As long as everything goes smoothly, you should be able to live a perfectly normal life.”

He let out a sigh of relief, “Thank God she was there.”

“Dr. Y/L/N?” Steve asked.

“Is that Y/N?” Clint asked.

“She’s one of our best” Steve confirmed with a nod.

“She was so badass. She came out of nowhere and took complete control of everything. I was freaking out and she just came over, started talking to me and calmed me down. She was yelling out commands to everyone and insisted the ambulance take us here. She stayed with me the whole time. It was amazing.”

“Sounds like Y/N,” Bucky said.

“Is she single? Do you think she’d go out with me? I figure I owe her dinner at the very least.”

Steve eyed Bucky and raised an eyebrow, forcing Bucky to answer that question.

“I…uh…I don’t know. You’d have to ask her.”

“If you see her, would you mind sending her in? So that I can thank her.”

Steve could see Bucky growing jealous and he hoped it might knock some sense into his friend.

“Yeah, I think she’s getting some scans done,” was all Bucky could muster. Steve jumped in to review the plan for surgery and let Clint know they were currently prepping the OR for him. Bucky excused himself and went to check on Y/N before he had to scrub in.

After what seemed like ages, all my scans were done and I sat there half-watching soap operas, waiting for the results. I heard the curtain pull back and figured it was Sam with my results.

“Can I go?” I whined. When I turned toward the visitor, I was surprised to find it wasn’t Sam at all. It was Bucky. “Hi…” I managed.

“How are you feeling?” he asked, looking at my chart.

“I’m fine. How’s Clint?”

“He’s good. We’re about to take him down to surgery. Steve is going to fix his femur and he has a little internal bleeding so we’re going to patch that up.”

“So he’ll be okay?”

“He should be fine.”

“Good.”

“He was asking about you.”

“Really?”

“Sounds like you did a great job at the scene.”

I gave him a half smile, “Thanks.”

“I got your scans back and everything looks good. Just take it easy the next few days. Sam will keep an eye on your lacerations and will remove your stitches in five days.”

“So I can go?” I asked.

He nodded, “I’ll sign your discharge papers. But you are going home. You aren’t sticking around here.”

I wanted to protest, but I knew he was probably right. He placed my chart back on the edge of the bed and turned to go.

“That’s it?”

“What, did you have questions?”

“Bucky, you haven’t even looked at me these past few weeks and now you’re just gonna act like nothing happened?”

He looked up at the ceiling before looking back towards me, “We’re not doing this.”

“Come on, Bucky. Please talk to me.”

He shook his head, and just walked away, leaving me sitting there, feeling hopeless.

After a few days of restless “rest” I returned to the hospital, hoping to get cleared so that I could clock in for my shift. I had all the nurses page Sam as I anxiously sat in the waiting room.

“You’re a day early,” Sam called as he walked toward the row of chairs.

“I’m actually just a spectacular patient who follows all the doctor’s care instructions.”

Sam gave me a look but sat in an open chair and signaled for me to lean in. He gently placed his hands on my face and tilted my head to study the wound.

“It is healing up pretty nicely. We can get those stitches out today.”

“Yessss,” I celebrated.

“Go pop in one of those empty rooms and I’ll be right in.”

I followed his directions and told the nurses which room I was taking. Sam entered a few moments later with his tools.

He started removing the surgical thread and I couldn’t stand the silence, so I made small talk.

“How is he?” I asked.

“Who Clint? His surgery went well as far as I know. You can probably go see him today.”

“Oh…I, uh, I meant Bucky.”

“Oh,” Sam said, taken by surprise. “He’s uh…he’s Bucky.”

“That’s very helpful,” I said sarcastically.

“Well I don’t know what to say. He’s…he’s not himself.”

“How do I get him to talk to me?” I hated how desperate I sounded, but it reflected how I felt. It was only getting worse for me.

Sam let out a deep exhale. “If I knew the answer to that, I would’ve told you weeks ago.”

“It’s like he’s his own worst enemy.”

“He’s stubborn. But he’ll come around.”

“You think?”

Sam shrugged, pulling out the last of the sutures. “One way or another.”

His response was vague, but he left before I could question him further.

Once Sam officially cleared me, I changed into my scrubs. Before I officially clocked into my shift, I went to check on Clint. He was recovering for a few days in the hospital before he’d be released. I poked my head in the door and found Steve in the room, doing a quick check up.

“There’s my hero,” Clint said, smiling at me. I blushed and looked down before smiling back.

“Am I interrupting?” I asked Steve.

“No, you can come in.”

I stepped into the room and walked over to Clint’s side.

“How are you feeling?” I asked him.

“Much better now.”

I smiled at him and then turned to Steve, “He’s doing okay?”

Steve nodded, “He’s doing great.”

“I told you I’d get you the best care,” I said to Clint.

“I think you gave me the best care. Without you, I don’t know that I’d be here.”

“Well, I guess we’ll never know,” I smiled. Clint grabbed my hand and gave it a squeeze.

“Hey, so this situation has obviously had a big impact on me and I can’t thank you enough for everything you did”

“You don’t have to thank me. This is my job,” I replied.

“I know, but you made sure I was in good hands and taken care of. And I know I would regret it if I didn’t do this so I have to ask…would you like to go to dinner with me on Friday?”

I was shocked, not expecting this. Clint was a good looking man, and he would probably make a great boyfriend. But I wasn’t ready to give up on Bucky.

“Like…on a date?” I asked for clarification.

“Yeah, a date,” he said confidently. I was looking at Clint but I could feel Steve’s eyes on me as I responded.

I placed my other hand on Clint’s, so that his hand was sandwiched between mine, “Clint, I am so flattered, but I’m not really in a place to date at the moment.”

“Is Friday not a good time? Because I’m flexible, we could do Saturday. Or whenever you’re free really.”

I smiled at him, “It’s not the day. I just…” I considered my words carefully, “my heart belongs to someone else.” I kept my focus on Clint, not able to handle Steve’s knowing glance.

“Ah, of course you have a boyfriend. Lucky bastard.”

“But I’ll still swing by and make sure you’re doing okay before you’re discharged.”

Clint gave my hand a sweet kiss and said, “I will always be so grateful for you Y/N. I wish you all the happiness in the world.”

“Same to you Clint. You’ve got a long life ahead of you, don’t waste it.” With that, I released his hand and stepped out of the room.

Once Sam finished removing Y/N’s stitches, he knew he had to find Steve. Sam had a busy morning ahead of him and was grateful when he ran into Steve pouring a cup of coffee in the resident’s lounge on his break.

“We gotta do something,” Sam said.

“About what?” Steve asked, sipping on his java. Sam gave him a look that said it all. “Bucky and Y/N?” Steve added.

Sam nodded, “He’s miserable and she’s still pining. And I don’t know how much longer I can watch this.”

“I feel the same way. Two idiots in love.”

“So what do we do?”

Steve thought for a moment “We need to get them in the same place at the same time. That’s not the hospital.”

“And has alcohol,” Sam added.

“But not Pym’s. Somewhere more…private.”

“Can we get her to Bucky’s house?” Sam asked. A wide grin spread over Steve’s face.

“No, but I think we can get her to mine…”

I rang the doorbell of the house, feeling slightly nervous. This was my first “work” party and I had no idea what to expect. Honestly. I was surprised that I was even invited. I had been working with Steve on ortho all week and it had been going well. Still, I wasn’t expecting an invitation to his housewarming party. I wasn’t really looking forward to the party, but wanted to make an appearance. At the very least, I thought I might see Bucky in a somewhat normal setting where I could maybe corner him and force a conversation.

What I did not expect was for Bucky to answer the door. I’m sure I looked stunned as I said, “Oh, hi.”

“Hi…” he said, as if seeking an explanation. He was dressed in sweats and a T-shirt, and he was barefoot.

“Am I early?” I asked him.

Now he looked thoroughly confused. “Early for what?”

“The housewarming party…” Bucky was still squinting in confusion, so I added, “Steve told me to bring gin…”

Bucky shook his head, “Um, Steve isn’t here. And he’s lived in this house for three years.”

Now it was my turn to look confused. “...What?”

Bucky sighed, “This is a set up.”

Again, I said, “What?”

“They meddled. They’re forcing us together.”

“So…why are you here then?”

“I’m dog-sitting for Steve.”

“Oh,” I said, finally realizing what had happened. Despite being fooled, I didn’t feel embarrassed. And I didn’t want to go home just yet.

“So….can I come in?” I asked. Bucky looked like he wasn’t sure what to say. “I have gin,” I cheesed, holding up the full bottle of Tanqueray.

He bit back a smile and opened the door wider, allowing me to come inside. I was immediately met by a smiling golden retriever. I placed the gin on a nearby table and crouched down in order to give some love to the pup.

“This is Liberty,” Bucky introduced.

“Hello Liberty!” I exclaimed, scratching her behind the ears as she happily panted. She quickly laid onto her back and I started scratching her belly, as she rolled around happily.

“She’s so sweet,” I commented.

“Yeah, she is pretty great.” Bucky was a few feet away in the kitchen and asked, ‘Do you want something to drink?” I picked up the Tanqueray and brought it over to him.

“Just a gin and tonic or gin and soda. Whatever Steve has.” I slid the bottle across the counter toward him as he pulled out two glasses.

“So tequila is for celebrating, whiskey is for wallowing…what is gin for?” he asked, as he poured a generous amount of gin into each of the glasses. He topped the drinks off with a little bit of tonic and then sliced up a lime and placed a wedge into each glass.

“Gin is for…heart-to-hearts,” I offered. He eyed me cautiously before handing me one of the glasses. I held it up, waiting for him to meet my glass, and eventually he did. Once we clinked, we both took a sip, and then stood there awkwardly in the kitchen.

“Are you ready to talk to me?” I offered, not wanting to waste any more precious time.

He shook his head, “Not really.”

I took a seat at the kitchen island and pulled out another stool, signaling for him to sit. He looked at the seat before finally giving in and sitting down next to me.

He turned to look at me and yet again I said, “Hi.” This was turning into my catch phrase around him. But I uttered it now because I wasn’t sure where to start.

Bucky let the slightest bit of a smile show and said, “Hi.” He broke eye contact and stared into his drink, and I realized I might need to nudge him a bit more.

“Look, if you’re not ready to talk about what happened, that’s okay. But I can’t take the silent treatment anymore. I’m going crazy and I don’t know how to help you.”

He let out a deep breath, “I’m not good at opening up...”

“Then just…tell me about your day.” He peered back up at me, uncertain and I shrugged, “We’ve gotta start somewhere.”

And so he did. He told me about the cases he had and I interjected with a cheeky comment every now and then to try and ease some of the tension, which surprisingly worked. Talking with him was always so easy and I just wanted to remind him of that. As the story of his day winded down, I took the liberty of refilling the now empty glasses with gin. I placed the fresh drink in front of Bucky and pushed, “Tell me about the PTSD.”

He surprised me when he didn’t argue. He mentally prepared by gulping down a third of his fresh drink.

“When I first got back from Afghanistan, it was pretty bad. It mostly manifested when I went to bed, in the form of night terrors. It was really terrible for a while. I would wake up in the morning surrounded by feathers with a knife in my bed, having attacked one of my pillows because I thought it was an enemy. I literally would walk through the house looking for weapons in my sleep. After that, I started locking the door and seeing a therapist who helped me work through a lot of it. And I started to get better. I still had the occasional nightmare, but I was able to manage it. I started to feel like myself again. I could get through most days without a flashback and I wasn’t constantly haunted by memories.”

I could see him starting to get emotional, so I reached out for his hand.

“Seeing you, with those marks on your neck, was evidence that I’m still broken. We’re lucky that this time it was just my hands and not a knife or a baseball bat. I can’t risk something happening to you.”

“Bucky, you are more than your PTSD. Did you ever consider that maybe we could work through this together?” I offered. He didn’t look at me, focusing all his energy on the drink in front of him. “You just pushed me away without even considering our options.”

“I was trying to protect you.”

“Bull. Shit. Things got tough and you bailed. Did you know I pulled you out of your haze? You had your hands around my neck and I was able to stop you and bring you back. So I believe we can work through this. Maybe it's locking the doors at night. Maybe we don’t have sleepovers for a little while. I don’t know the solution, but I’m willing to figure out something that works.”

“Y/N…” he sighed.

“No, don’t do that. Don’t give up on us.” Now I was starting to get emotional. My voice cracked as I continued. “You know we have something special. Hell, you knew before I did. And I resisted against this the best I could because I didn’t want to get distracted. Which backfired because trying not to think about you was more distracting than just succumbing to your charms. But I figured it out and I opened myself up to something more and just when I finally accept that I’m falling in love, this happens. And the thing that hurts the most is how quickly you decided to throw this away. To throw…me…away,” the last line came out as a whisper.

Bucky bore his eyes into his drink, unable to watch her tear up and in so much pain, knowing he caused all of this. It felt like a lose-lose situation, either way she ended up hurt. At least if he pushed her away, she still had the chance to live a happy life.

I wiped away a stray tear with the heel of my hand and took a big sip of my drink, trying to distract myself from the feelings creeping up inside me. When I looked over at Bucky, he was frozen but there was no emotion behind his eyes. He was fixated ahead, refusing to look at me. That was the moment I realized this was a lost cause. There was nothing else I could say.

I let out the deep breath I didn’t realize I was holding and placed my near-empty glass on the counter.

“Okay then,” I said, collecting the few things I brought with me. “Goodbye, Bucky.”

#bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes x you #bucky x reader #bucky barnes doctor au #bucky barnes slow burn #bucky barnes series

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83liss · 6 months ago

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Eternal Avenger (2)

Sentimientos Confusos

Desnudo, con las sábanas cubriéndolos únicamente en las cintura y Carol dormida a su lado boca abajo, Sam miraba el techo de su habitación sin entender como había llegado hasta allí. ¡le había hecho el amor a su esposa, la mujer que amaba, la madre de su hijo, pensando en otra mujer! Peor aún, ¡en el personaje de un video juego que en realidad era su mejor amigo! Y si eso no era lo suficientemente malo, no podía dejar de compararlos, y Bucky, o su personaje, ganaban la competencia, ¡y por mucho! Si, era el personaje. Porque de lo contrario significaría que… Lo único que pudo hacer fue liberarse del abrazo y girarse dándole la espalda

Los siguientes días fueron extraños. Bucky le mandaba SMS, pero los ignoraba. Aunque tampoco lograba concentrarse en el trabajo. Se estaba distanciando de Carol, aunque no era lo que quería. Intentaba mirar otras mujeres, pero no le provocaban nada, por el contrario, terminaba comparándolas con Roxette, lo que a su vez lo llevaba a momentos comprometedores. ¡Y su imaginación! ¡No lograba mantener la mente en el rostro de Roxette, sino por momentos se convertía en el de Bucky!

Dos semanas después se quedó cuidando a Joaquín en casa mientras Carol salía con unas amigas. A las nueve acostó a su hijo y le leyó un cuento hasta que el pequeño se durmió. Bajó lentamente a la sala y comenzó a jugar en su vieja consola. Había pasado cerca de diez minutos cuando recibió la invitación a jugar de Bucky. Tomó su simulador y se lo colocó. Definitivamente estaba esperando esa invitación

Hola –, dijo Sam con voz neutra – no puedo jugar mucho

Tranquilo – dijo Bucky nervioso –, yo tampoco

Oye, mira… no es excusa – dijo Sam dubitativo – la última vez que jugamos… estaba borracho. Ya sabes, por la fiesta

Yo también – dijo Bucky, aunque algo le dolió en su pecho

Bien – dijo Sam con cierta decepción en su tono – sería bueno jugar dejando eso de lado

Claro – dijo Bucky, aunque empezaba a tener ganas de hacerse una bolita en su sofá, igual que su gata Alphine, y llorar, sin embargo, entró al juego – te voy a hacer morder el polvo – le dijo su avatar mientras hacia una especie de calentamiento

Di mejor que lo intentaras solamente, porque no lo lograras

Primer Round. A pelear – dijo la voz en off dl programa

Se fueron acercando el uno al otro con la guardia en alto, ninguno se animaba a dar el primer golpe. Estaban solo a centímetros cuando el avatar de Bucky se lanzó a abrazarse del cuello de Sam, quien lo abrazo desesperado de la cintura, mientras eran sus lenguas quienes batallaban mortalmente. La mano de Sam se coló bajo la diminuta falda amarilla de Bucky, quien gemía ante el contacto

Cayeron al suelo y Sam sentó al avatar de Bucky sobre sus piernas mientras le quitaba la ropa sin romper el beso. Bucky le arranco el pantalón antes de que Sam los hiciera rodar y se acomodara entre sus piernas.

¡Sam! – gimió Bucky, pero su boca fue asaltada nuevamente mientras sentía como la hambría del moreno se abría paso en su interior arrancándoles gemidos incomprensibles

¡Dios! – gemía el moreno con cada movimiento

¡Es…! – y el mundo de ambos estalló en millones de colores y sensaciones

¡Bucky! – susurro Sam antes de besarlo en la frente mientras este le besaba el pecho

El moreno se acostó en la arena y acomodo al otro entre sus brazos. Sentía su tensión. Él estaba igual. Acaban de cruzar la línea, pero… ¿cuánto abarcaba esa línea? ¿el género? ¿su orientación? ¿el mundo real? Él amaba a Carol, pero…

Bucky se levantó y empezó a vestirse en silencio sin mirarlo. Era estúpido, porque no era su cuerpo real, pero sentía que no podía continuar desnuda, o desnudo. Vio de reojo como Sam se vestía también evitando su mirada. Se sentó al borde de la playa y se mordió el labio para no llorar

Entonces… supongo que ahora somos gay – dijo sintiendo como Sam se sentaba a su lado y no pudo evitar sonreír al ver la cara del otro hombre – es broma, idiota

Obvio – dijo el avatar de Sam – no me siento gay. ¡Demonios! – gritó Sam moviéndose como si le hubiese pasado la corriente

¿qué pasa? – dijo Bucky sobresaltado

Salir del juego – dijo Sam y desapareció – Joaquín, deberías estar en la cama

Tengo sed – dijo el niño

¿Tienes sed? – pregunto Sam sacándose su simulador – ok, vamos por agua – dijo nervioso

Acostado en su cama, Sam tecleaba un mensaje cuando escucho a Carol llagar. Silencio su aparato y lo dejo bloqueado sobre su mesita de noche antes de fingir dormir. La mujer entro minutos después. La escuchó desvestirse y se acostó a su lado. Olía a trago, quizás algo más, pero…, debía su imaginación. Lo curioso era que a él no le importaba

A medida que el sol comenzó a asomarse sobre el horizonte, la ciudad que nunca duerme, se tiñó de tonos dorados y rosados. Los primeros rayos de luz iluminaron los rascacielos de Manhattan, haciendo que sus fachadas de vidrio y acero brillaran con un resplandor cálido y acogedor. El aire era fresco, con una brisa suave que traía consigo el aroma del río Hudson y del East River, mezclado con los primeros indicios del día caluroso que estaba por venir.

A lo largo de las calles, los primeros madrugadores comenzaron a aparecer. Corredores y ciclistas aprovecharon las horas más frescas del día para hacer ejercicio, mientras que otros paseaban a sus perros o simplemente disfrutaban del ambiente sereno antes de que la ciudad cobrara vida con su habitual frenesí.

Desde los puentes que cruzaban el río, se podía observar cómo el sol se elevaba sobre el horizonte, bañando todo a su paso con una luz dorada. Los turistas y locales que se congregaban para ver el amanecer en lugares icónicos como el Puente de Brooklyn disfrutaron de una vista impresionante de la ciudad despertando.

Carol entró a la cocina cuando Joaquín salía después de desayunar y Sam levantaba los platos. No hubo reclamos, pero la rubia se sintió en la necesidad de explicar que, si bien no pensaba beber, su periodo menstrual había llegado sorpresivamente y se había deprimido. Sam respiro hondo y le dijo que lo lamentaba. Aunque en realidad lo que lamentaba era no hacerlo realmente. Lamentaba no desear otro hijo. Lamentaba la doble vida que empezaba a vivir. Lamentaba no desear a su mujer. Y lamentaba tener que cumplir sus responsabilidades de esposo pensando en Bucky, a veces en su avatar, a veces como hombre real, aunque estas eran las menos veces

Las semanas avanzaron y los encuentros con Bucky se hacían más frecuentes. De una pasaron a tres veces por semana. Diferentes escenarios, siempre el mismo final. Sexo. Al principio era salvaje, desenfrenado, pero con el paso de las noches se volvía suave, dulce. Besos, risas cómplices, caricias reconfortantes con él, mientras que con Carol cada vez le costaba más, y se volvía más común ese sentimiento de obligación. A tal punto que más de una vez se preguntó si en realidad no era una especie de violación que la mujer hacia con él sin saberlo, ya que realmente no le provocaba nada, mientras que con Bucky lo experimentaba todo

Bucky tampoco estaba mejor. Su relación con Yelena no iba para nada bien, pero parecía que a él no le importaba. Solo podía pensar en Sam y sus encuentros en el juego. Ese mundo que solo era de los dos, y en el que no tenía que compartir al moreno con nadie mas

Tres meses después, el avatar de Sam estaba sentado en una banca acariciándole el cabello a Roxette quien estaba acostada con la cabeza en el regazo de Lance, cuando ella interrumpió el silencio

Okey, sé cuándo estás pensando en algo ¿Qué pasa?

¿Cómo es? – pregunto Sam – quiero decir ¿Cómo es estar en un cuerpo de mujer cuando…? – y Bucky lo silencio colocándole un dedo sobre los labios

¡De… locos! – dijo Bucky sentándose con las rodillas topándole el pecho para estar más cerca de Sam – ¡es de locos! Es diferente. ¡Lo que se siente físicamente es más… satisfactorio! No puedo explicarlo. Es como si una persona es un solo de guitarrista, y otra es la orquesta entera. Pero… la canción es la misma, aunque con diferentes ritmos

Suficiente – dijo Sam – Creo que ya agotaste esa analogía

Vete al infierno – dijo Bucky empujándolo suavemente mientras se acomodaba el pelo

Sam sonríe ante esa reacción y lo toma suavemente de la barbilla para besarlo de manera lenta, disfrutando de la textura de su piel. Baja su mano hasta el muslo de la chica mientras intensifica su lucha d lenguas. La toma de la cintura y la arrastra hasta su regazo para abrazarla posesivamente. Cada día se le hacía más difícil separarse de ella y volver al mundo real

Cada día su culpa aumentaba más. Carol era una buena madre, buena mujer, buena amiga, buena compañera…, pero no era Bucky. Tenía que detenerse antes que alguien saliese lastimado, pero…

Una semana después su celular sonó mientras estaba en el trabajo. Era un SMS de Carol. Era corto y concreto

Ya tengo niñera para esta noche. Besos

¿para qué? – tecleó Sam

Es nuestro aniversario – decía el siguiente SMS de ella – gracias por recordarlo

¡Había olvidado su aniversario! Eso era simplemente… ¡imperdonable! Buscó rápidamente el número de Bucky y escribió “Hoy no puedo. Es mi aniversario. Lo siento. Besos” pero borro la última palabra y envió el SMS

De ahí en mas todo fue un desastre ese día. Bucky lo dejo en visto. El trabajo se complicó. Olvidó comprar un regalo. Llegó tarde al restaurante. Cuando lo hizo, Carol hablaba con prácticamente un niño que le coqueteaba descaradamente. Durante la cena no lograron conectar porque su cabeza solo pensaba en Roxette y en Bucky a la vez. Carol empezó a preguntarle si había alguien más y él no sabía que decir. Intentó consolarla cuando confesó estar consciente de que su cuerpo ya no era el mismo desde Joaquín, pero hasta él se asqueo de su intento vano de consolarla. La brecha entre ellos se abría más a cada paso. Carol habló de que estaban intentando tener otro hijo, pero llevaban semanas sin tener intimidad. ¡Era realmente frustrante! Él solo quería tener a Bucky allí, y no a su esposa.

_________________

“Hoy no puedo. Es mi aniversario. Lo siento.” Ese SMS había sido devastador para Bucky. ¡Sam había preferido salir con Carol, que encontrarse con él! ¿Qué tenía ella que él no? Okey, esa había sido una pregunta estúpida, mucho de hecho. Pero ya no podía más ¡Los celos lo estaban matando! Así que había llamado a Yelena y habían terminado en la cama, teniendo sexo. Aunque la definición correcta seria, intentando tener sexo. No lograba nada sin Sam de por medio. El colmo había sido cuando había aceptado su derrota y la rubia muy suelta de cuerpo tomando su celular le había preguntado si le importaba si lo hacía sola, y ante su negativa le había tomado segundo llegar al clímax ella sola. ¿Por qué él necesita si o si a Sam para eso? ¿Por qué se había enamo…? Fue cuando detuvo en seco sus pensamientos. Una cosa era el sexo virtual, y otra cosa muy diferente los sentimientos. Había traspasado la línea. ¡Sam no perdonaría eso! ¡Lo… dejaría y…!

Se levanto y se vistió. Fue a la sala para darle privacidad a Yelena, aunque sea así debía comportarse como hombre. Se conecto al video juego ¡Necesitaba a Sam más que nunca! Le envió una solicitud y espero

Sam jugaba en la sala cuando vio la invitación. Miro hacia el segundo piso y respiro hondo. Debía terminar con esta locura ¡ya!

Apagó el televisor, guardó el simulador en su caja. Abrió un estante donde guardaba sus viejos libros y metió la caja en lo más profundo tapando el acceso con más libros. Su familia no merecía esa deslealtad. Carol había sido su elección y era feliz con ella. No necesitaba nada mas ¿entonces por qué tenía tantas ganas de llorar? ¿Por qué se sentía tan miserable? ¿Por qué no sacaba a Bucky de su cabeza? Y los SMS no ayudaban.

Llevaban una semana en la que Bucky le preguntaba cuando se iba a conectar. Que lo necesitaba. ¡como si él no lo hiciera! Sin embargo, se negaba a ceder. Sabía que, si lo hacía solo una vez, sería el final de todo. Y entonces…

_______________________

¿Cómo estuvo su semana? La mía con mucho trabajo en la oficina.

¿Cómo ven la historia? ¿se parece a la original? Díganme aquí abajo, en los comentarios

También les quería preguntar si les gustaría ver a Carly más adelante dándole lata a sus padres como adolescente. OJO, esta historia no es MPREG, por lo tanto, Joaquín y Carly son hijos de Sam y Carol

Espero sus comentarios, gracias por leerme. Volveré el próximo domingo

#bucky barnes #sambucky #sam wilson #falcon and the winter soldier #falcon y el soldado del invierno

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thing-you-do-with-that-thing · 2 years ago

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Okay CHALLENGE FOR ALL MY FIC WRITERS OUT THERE.

If you do a take on this for a spn character or a marvel character (or rpf for either) tag me (this blog for spn and @until-theend-oftheline for marvel) it and I will read and reblog. The funnier the better! Not limeted to those I tag.

@blacktithe7 @jewels2876 @buckyywiththegoodhair @bucky-at-bedtime @bucky-is-my-precious @avengerscompound @sorenmarie87 @angelkurenai @luci-in-trenchcoats @after-avenging-hours @bionic-buckyb @mrswhozeewhatsis @evansrogerskitten @fictionalabyss @grace-for-sale @imagine-assembling-the-avengers @just-another-busy-fangirl @kitsn0w @katymacsupernatural

#challenge

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random-imagines-blog · 3 years ago

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Imagine touch-starved Bucky Barnes.

He’s missing your touch despite the fact that you’re less than a foot away and your arm continually grazes his as you make your way through the grocery store. He was holding the basket with his metallic arm, the other one continually trying to be close to you, pinkies rubbing against one another - but you kept on pulling away, kept on reaching for a food item and talking happily about what you were going to make for him that night. Asking if he would prefer this kinda pasta sauce or another - but all that he could think about was grabbing hold of your hand and bringing it to his lips, taking in the sweet perfume smell, or slipping his hand into your back pocket so that he could feel close but you were just so - damn out of the way.

“When did you want to have Sam come over?” You asked, turning to face him, slipping the ingredients of the decided sauce into the basket, being so damn close. He kept looking at you, trying to think of something to say but his mind was back on this morning when you two were practically one person, rolling around in the bed, flesh on flesh, and needing - NEEDING that feeling again. “Buck?” You asked, not getting an answer out of him.

“It doesn’t matter,” He said, dropping the basket onto the ground. It made a sort of plastic hitting plastic sound when it reached the floor, garnering some attention from oher shoppers, looking for some sort of drama to spice up their Sunday morning routines. “Hug me.”

“What?”

“Please?”

You smiled with confusion, but you did, going in from the side, wrapping one arm around him. But he wouldn’t allow that to be the case, he pulled you in, both arms. Rubbing your back. Metal, flesh, all against the fabric of your t-shirt. “What’s wrong?” You asked, your voice muffled by his jacket.

“I just needed to feel you,” He whispered. Because you were real. The nightmares could confuse him sometimes. The flashbacks, the visions that he sometimes got, all of the negatives in his life which fuddled up his brain and made him wonder - but the touch, the touch was real, that wasn’t a part of any illusion or confusion in his head. “You never do this in public with me.”

“I - I didn’t think that you would be into that sort of thing,” You admitted, putting both of your arms around him now and squeezing him. “We’re getting a lot of attention.”

“Don’t care. Need you. Always,” He grunted.

Requested by: @summerdaughter

#Bucky Barnes #Bucky Barnes x reader #Bucky Barnes imagines #Marvel #Marvel imagines #request #imagines #buckyb

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harold231 · 4 years ago

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It wasn't real

Pairing: Bucky x reader

Posted: 04/30/2021

Word count: 2.5k

Warnings: None? Maybe a lil angst just a lel bet.

A/N: I think it might be good? Idk You let me know. But like frfr, don't just give me feedback in your mind, put it into words. Also I apparently have a thing for Bucky in a dotted apron soooo yeah.

FYI: time zone/era is open for interpretation. Bucky never became an avenger/soldat and steve isn't part of this one.

The wind that blew around you was warm and sweet with the scent of freshly bloomed flowers. Perhaps it was an act of kindness from some God trying to distract you from the cold bitterness settling into your bones. Closing your eyes you conjure the very memory that left you so desolate.

The sun snuck it's way through the curtains to illuminate the room, effectively disturbing the sleep that you always seemed to be craving. Waking up is always hassle but whenever you remember that you get to spend your day with the only person who tolerates you and you him, getting out of bed is the easiest thing. Bucky is crazy and the damn boy is never in one spot for to long and he always has something to say, but you can't imagine how boring your days would be if you guys had never met. well technically if your parents had never met.

When you were a child you parents had to move to new york for business and they decided that Brooklyn was the place to be. You had been Bucky's neighbor and the first day you guys moved in his mom had dragged him over with the most delicious angel food cake that he so proudly claimed to have made mostly on his own. He just loved cooking and baking since forever, he would tell you that he just liked experimenting with foods but you knew the truth was that the boy liked to eat and didn't have the patience to wait for his mother to come home.

Only a few years after your family had moved to Brooklyn you and Bucky had already built an unbreakable bond. You guys had found a beautiful cherry tree one day when playing tag and had deemed it to be your's and Bucky's spot. Whenever you had a bad day or needed time away from the world you guys would go to the tree and just pick cherries, in the winter time you and Bucky would lay under the tree and kick the trunk so that the snow would fall from the leaves. It was the place where at only 15 years old bucky swore he would open his own Bakery and to quote him "I'm serving my ma's food my way doll, It's gonna be the next best thing to hit New York."

You were laying on the ground with your hands crossed behind your head looking up at Bucky swinging upside down from a branch when he told you all this. You felt something you had never felt before at that moment, looking up at the wild haired boy who loved to eat, loved his family, and had the most ambition you had ever heard from kids your age. Your heart felt full and your cheeks grew warm as you looked up at the same blue eyes you had know for years now, only this time you notice the way they twinkle in the sunlight and how rosy his lips are. Now 7 years laters you and Bucky were preparing to open the very bakery he promised you he'd open. Banners were beautifully strung along the walls and cute retro china was set out, ready to be filled for opening day. There was no hesitation from you when Bucky had asked you to run the bakery with him, you were excited to spend your days with the person you hoped you would spend the rest of your life with.

At around 6:30 in the morning you had arrived at the bakery but it seemed that Bucky had beat you to it. The smell of fresh angel food cake and cocoa danced up your nose as soon as you opened the door. Closing your eyes you smiled at the memories that it brought back. Moving to the back you grabbed your Disney themed apron and placed your bag and coat in its place before scurrying over to the kitchen while trying (and failing) to tie your apron. There in all his dorkiness was Bucky wiggling around to the chordettes. He knew that you loved the 50's aesthetic so he found a way to incorporate it without going overboard, by adding little trinkets, a jukebox, and even those cute little dining tables. In fact at the moment he was wearing a ruffly red polka dotted apron as he frosted some cupcakes.

Apron tied, you were finally ready to get to work. You walked up to Bucky bumping his hip as you reached for some cupcake pans, "Whatcha doin here so early Buck, we don't open until 12" he looks at you with squinted eyes, "The hell are you doing here so early." "Woah,woah,woah completely unprovoked. I'm just saying cuz' you were the one complaining about the opening time being set at 8. Like damn." Breathing out a huff of air he wipes his forehead with a towel "I'm sorry doll, I'm just super nervous and I couldn't sleep so I came to start baking things. I already frosted the ice cream cakes and I just finished the pies, but I was thinking that maybe we needed some cupcakes too, even though we already baked so many pastries and stuff last night I'm worried it won't be enough."

Setting down the trays you move to hug Bucky from behind holding him close to you. "Buck I know we'll do great your food is too good to pass up on especially when it's free." You place a soft kiss to his shoulder " I promise you'll do great, everything you do is amazing you try your hardest at everything Buck, You've worked your butt off and made mine considerably larger to get here, don't start losing your mind on me now." A cute little laugh from Bucky lets you know that he's hearing you and he isn't so stressed anymore. "I just want this to be perfect ya know?" with your head still against his back you nod, "I just want it to be a special day for my special girl."

You couldn't stop the slight blush that rose to your cheeks or the way that your heart suddenly started beating three times faster. You had also wanted to make him something special which is why you had got here so early. Finally releasing your hold on Bucky you straighten your apron out before gathering everything you need for some red velvet cupcakes. Bucky loved your red velvet cake so you loved making it for him. After hours of mixing, baking, and frosting had passed, you guys were rewarded with a bakery that looked as great as it smelled. "Alright doll, I'm heading out, I gotta go get ready. Meet you back here at 12 , Love ya." He didn't even give you a chance to answer as he ran right out the door. "Love you too."

You had stayed behind just a little while longer as you perfected your secret project. Carefully you added snowflakes to some of the cupcakes because you knew how much he loved snow even if he hated winter, some cats, flowers that reminded you of bucky, and one extra special cupcake. When you finish you decide to clean up a bit more and prepare some drinks for later before heading home to get ready. As soon as you got home you took a shower and did the simplest of make up with a light pink lip. You had decided to wear a dress to match the blossoming flowers that spring had brought. Pink with a yellow lace trim and flowers embroided all over the dress, matching it with some yellow flats.

You had decided that it was a perfect day for a walk so you grabbed a light scarf and slung it over your shoulders, grabbed Bucky's cupcakes, and headed over to the bakery. You felt as if a Hundred pounds had been lifted from your shoulders knowing that Bucky had felt the same way about you. You had decided that you would tell him today with your special cupcakes. As you rounded the corner you felt giddy and you couldn't wipe the smile from your face no matter how hard you tried. As you reached the bakery you saw that a majority of the people had already arrived and you knew that it would put Bucky at ease to see all the people enjoying his food. You stopped at the window, closing your eyes to take a deep breath to prepare yourself to join the celebration.

Opening your eyes you reached for the handle only to stop at the sight on the other side of the door. Bucky stood there arms wrapped around a woman eyes locked on hers as he leaned in for a kiss. It must have all happened in about 30 seconds but it felt as if time himself had slowed it down for you to watch the way he tilted her head and ran his tongue along her bottom lip before finally uniting their lips. Your heart dropped as quickly as your smile did and suddenly you felt so stupid for thinking this could be real. You willed yourself not to cry as you allowed your legs to carry you anywhere but there.

That's how you found yourself sitting underneath a blossoming cherry tree. A tree that held only happy memories because it wasn't a place you could be sad... back then. With your back against the tree and box of cupcakes full of unrequited love in your lap you realize how much you over romanticized Bucky. Opening the box you decide it would be a shame to let them go to waste. The first one you grab has a big red heart frosted in the middle, you let out a deep sigh before breaking the cupcake right down the middle. You shove half of the cupcake into your mouth and only then do you allow the tears to fall. You sat there for hours crying eating cupcakes, watching the sunset, and thinking about everything that Bucky did for you, as a friend. You realize you had no right to be angry at Bucky, after all you never told him how you felt you just assumed that he would feel the same way after so many years. With every broken memory another cupcake vanished.

He was always there for you, when no one wanted to come to your slumber party Bucky did and he even did all the girly things with you. Painting your nails, doing your hair, watching chick flicks, and pillow fights. once he even asserted that no one could protect you as well as he could, when you had decided to go camping with your friend from class so he insisted on taking you himself. Your friend was most noticeably gay so you had assumed he wanted to spend time alone with you. But now that you think back on those memories these are things that anyone would do for their bestfriend. And that's what you realized 8 hours and 11 cupcakes later.

The moon floated above you and as it's white rays settled upon the lake you decided it might be time to go home now. You get up and dust your dress off before leaning down to grab the mostly empty box. Turning around you are stopped again by what's in front of you. Bucky stands there brows furrowed as his eyes flash from you to the box in your hands. "Where the hell have you been, I've been calling you all day." swallowing the lump in your throat you go to answer but are interrupted. " everyone's been asking me about you all night and I had no damn idea what to tell them, but apparently you were just out here being inconsiderate. You go and tell me I can do great tonight, that you'd be there for me, but you weren't." You try to answer him but are again interrupted. "You could have told me something earlier instead of leaving me there like a dumb-" "SHUT UP!" this time it was your turn to interrupt him.

Taking a deep breath you look into his eyes before explaining. "Of course I was ready to be there today, you think I wore this dress to sit under a damn tree? Well I didn't. When I left my apartment I was ready and I was excited, so excited. I couldn't even stop smiling on my way over, but then I got to the shop and I saw-" Immediately you stopped as you realized what you were about to say. He cocked an eyebrow and shook his head slightly as if to say 'Hello?' "You saw what? What did you see that would make you abandon ship just like that?" Shame flushed through your being and you could no longer keep eye contact. "Nothing, you know what, it doesn't even matter. I'm sorry I was being dramatic I should have been an adult and dealt with it on my own time. And I'm sorry I abandoned you all, but the night was about you anyways."

"The night was supposed to be about the both of us so it does matter if you saw something that made you want to leave. Just tell me doll, what did you see?" his voice is soft as he pleads with you. "I saw... well I saw you kissing that lady and I just wanted get away and ended up here okay!?" You said it all in a jumble hoping that he wouldn't be able to understand what you had said. But luck wasn't your friend so of course he did. "So seeing me kiss another person was so gross to you that you had to run away, what the hell? are you 13 again?" You hadn't admitted it outloud yet and it seemed that the dumbass in front of you was going to force it out of you.

Stepping around Bucky you pull your scarf tight around your body as you focus on not crying anymore until you get home. You distract yourself by thinking of all the love you saw in all the little things Bucky did for you. Dancing around the newly furnished bakery body against body as frank sinatra brought you heart to heart, watching rom-coms and ugly crying together, but by the time you get home you force yourself to face the ugly truth. The Love was always in your head. It wasn't real.

A new wave of tears blurred your vision as teardrops fell perfectly to the ground. "It's because I have feelings for you Bucky, and I now know you don't feel the same way." Sniffling you don't bother looking up because your heart is to broken for that right now. "I'm Just gonna need a little bit of time and I'll be back good as new like nothing even happened." Still unable to lift your gaze from the ground you decide to focus on the last cupcake left in the box. 'I Love You' is written in tiny light blue frosting letters. "I uhm, uhh." That brought your attention to Bucky, as embarrassment pulsed as strong as ever through your veins. " You don't have to say anything Buck, It's fine, I'll see you next week, on monday" you hand him the box as you go to pass him "I think you would have a better use for this than me I ate 11 others already so."

Divider credits: @firefly-graphics

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babybatmunch · 5 years ago

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Peter quoting a vine: "it's either kill or be killed. Whatcha gonna do?. Whatcha gonna do?" Dances lightly.

Bucky: "............"

Bucky: "fucking kill me-"

Steve: ".........buck"

#peterp #peterparker #vine #joke #Genz #haha #headcoN #headcanon #buckyb #buckybarnes

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espinosaurusrexex · 2 years ago

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Series is officially complete!

As already mentioned, I will be hosting a little Q&A session regarding this series next weekend. So if you have any questions, thoughts, or even some media you’d like to share - please do!

@buckyb-stan @aswrittenbyaj @not-another-fangirl @this--is--music @pinkpunkdynamite @wintermischief @patricks-fabulous-face @ryansreadings @wiintaersoldier @marvle-lover69 @sweetwritingfanficfriend @almosttoopizza @sociallyimpairedme @royalwritersoftheuniverses @i-l-y-3000 @mrsgweasley @prettylittlepluviophile @circe143 @valkyrie418 @mirikusashes @noideawhyimdoingthislol @nikkitc0703 @lethallyprotected @erynnnn @misshale21

𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠'𝐬 𝐁𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐖𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰 (𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭)

BuckyBarnes x Female!Reader

summary: Bucky and Y/N sneak into Westview to have the perfect life. Away from late Steve and Tony, Vision and Natasha, they let themselves be consumed by suburban magic. To their surprise, however, some of these people aren’t so dead in the town. And there are some other weird things happening that make them question their sanity. But that’s okay, right? ‘Cause everything’s better in Westview.

a/n: I got this idea after seeing this tiktok, and I just wanna thank @mrs-capsicle for sparking this fun idea! It's been in the making for a while now, and I am so excited to finally post my very first full length series on this blog. I'm sorry I left you waiting so long, but I wanted this to be perfect.

word count: ~57k

series warnings: fake dating trope (cause we’re a sucker for those), grief, anxiety, pining, fluff, slow burn, soft Bucky, alcohol consumption, mentions of death, language, mentions of infertility, smut (chapters are marked with *) !MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠'𝐬 𝐁𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐖𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰

・◦* ✶ 𝒔𝒆𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒔 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒚𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 ☾◦ *・

one - the lonely diaries

two - suburban magic

three - I trust you

four - Vision, Darling

five - band-aids

six - floating

seven - the thing about lying

eight - life is great... oh wait

nine* - promises (Bucky's version)

ten - the punchline

eleven - we're finally okay

twelve - distant dreams (again)

・◦* ✶ this series is complete ☾◦ *・

𝑻𝑨𝑮𝑳𝑰𝑺𝑻 (If you want to be tagged for just this series, make sure to tell me) @4buckyb @almosttoopizza @royalwritersoftheuniverses @circe143 @valkyrie418 @mirikusashes

#completed series #q&a session

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lunarbuck · 1 year ago

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Kinktober Week 1: Love Bites

header: @jen-with-a-pen

Pairing: Steve Rogers x f!reader (any race)

Word Count: 422

Prompt: Love Bites

Warnings: fingering, pet names [baby], neck biting

a/n: yay day 1 of kinktober <3 i hope you guys enjoy!!! not beta'd, all mistakes are mine baby

my masterlist | kinktober masterlist | join my taglist

Strong hands roam your body, teasing and pinching as they explore you. You lean back into Steve’s chest as his fingers trace the edge of your panties. You gasp when his lips make contact with your neck, gliding kisses along the sensitive skin.

“Steve,” you whisper, arching your back. He hums against your neck, teeth gently nipping before his tongue soothes the mark. “Don’t tease.”

Without removing his lips from his neck, Steve rests his hands on your waist and starts to walk you backward. He sits on the edge of the bed, you on his lap. The feeling of Steve’s dick pressed against your ass makes your core tighten.

“You taste so good, sweetheart,” he rasps, fingers resuming their descent on your body. He drags his index finger across the seam of your panties, finding you aching and wet for him. “Feel so good on top of me.” He pushes your panties to the side, exposing your heated flesh to the room’s cool air. You shiver in his grasp, earning you another bite to your neck.

Two of Steve’s big fingers press inside of you, sliding in easily. You moan, relaxing fully against Steve. He’s steady and strong behind you, but you can feel tension in his muscles. He’s so worked up just by giving you this pleasure.

Steve’s fingers work magic on your pussy, curling and hitting that spot inside you that makes your head spin, while his lips and tongue worship your neck. His free hand roams the rest of your body, squeezing your breasts and grazing over your thighs. Each touch brings you closer and closer to snapping.

“Stevie, please.” Your voice comes out as a whimper, needy. He smirks against your neck, biting the flesh of your shoulder as he grinds the heel of his palm against your clit.

“Come for me, baby. I know you want to.” You twist your eyes shut as you succumb, letting the wave of pleasure pull you under. Steve holds you to his chest as you go limp, sucking in deep breaths. He helps you lay back on the bed, cushioned by the plush comforter.

Sated and happy, you grin at your beautiful boyfriend when he kneels beside you. You watch him lick his fingers, groaning at your taste. His eyes roam over your neck and shoulders, the spots where he’d bitten, and kissed heating under his attention.

“You’re so pretty when you come, baby.” Even though you just came, heat floods in your belly. “Why don’t you show me again.”

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endless-summer-soldier · 7 months ago

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dr. feelgood - chapter twelve

pairing: Surgeon!Bucky x SurgicalIntern!Reader

summary: Y/N has a one night stand with a handsome stranger the night before starting her new job as a surgical intern. Little does she know, the handsome stranger also happens to be her new boss

warnings: must be 18+, drinking, some surgery descriptions, smut, self-pleasure, praise kink, oral sex, unprotected sex, rough sex, PTSD, choking, angst

word count: 3.7k

a/n: ask and you shall receive! I started doing my final proofing and got tired and decided to post so apologies for any typos, I'll fix them later lol. please enjoy this one and thanks for your patience!

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It took exactly three seconds for Bucky to come to his senses. The gentle click of the door shutting brought him back to reality and he realized he couldn’t do this anymore. He couldn’t pretend like his heart didn't skip a beat every time she came into the room. That every time she smiled at him, he completely lost his focus. She was all he thought about, day in and day out, even when he was avoiding her. He wanted a future with her. In fact, she was the first woman he'd ever met that he could see a future with. And he had messed it all up.

What hit him suddenly, as she walked out of the house, was that if he let her go, he was just bringing on more trauma. He would never emotionally recover from losing her. He would be stuck with his PTSD night terrors and would always live life wondering what if things were different. One of the lessons he learned in combat is that life is short and precious, and it shouldn’t be wasted.

“I’m such an idiot,” he mumbled to himself. He flew out the front door, hoping he could still catch her before she took off. It was a monsoon outside, with water pouring down in buckets. He caught the headlights of her car flooding the driveway and he darted toward the vehicle without another thought. He didn’t waste time putting shoes on, running outside in just socks. While wet socks were one of his pet peeves in life, at this moment he didn’t care.

He knocked feverishly on her window before she could put the car in reverse. She was initially startled before she rolled down the window.

“What are you-” before she could finish her question, his hand was around her jaw and his lips were caressing hers. This was the last thing she expected, but she didn’t stop him, wondering if this was the last time she’d feel his lips on hers. He was dripping cold rainwater all over her and the seat of her car but she didn’t even care. She leaned into him, savoring the taste of his gin-coated lips.

He pulled away, leaning his forehead against hers, stealing the breath from her lips. “I’m not giving up on us,” was all he said.

That gave her the confidence she needed. This time she took the lead, placing both hands around his jaw and pulling him closer to her, smiling in between every delicate kiss.

“I’m so in love with you,” he whispered in between kisses and she reacted by holding him tighter and running her fingers through the hair on the back of his neck. “I’m sorry I didn’t fight for us. I just wanted to protect you.”

She pulled away and nuzzled into his neck, “I know, I know Buck. It’s okay.” Their blissful moment was interrupted by the cheerful barking of a golden retriever. Bucky turned around to find Liberty running around in circles in the pouring down rain, sloshing through the mud.

“Well shit,” he chuckled.

“You leave the front door open?”

“Apparently,” he turned back to Y/N and gave her one more quick peck on the lips. “I better wrangle her up, Will you stay? I’ll meet you inside and we can talk?”

She nodded and laughed while he ran off after Liberty, sliding shoeless in the mud as he attempted to usher the dog back inside. Y/N was already half soaked from Bucky’s drippage so she easily made the decision to cut the engine and run inside. She captured Liberty’s attention as she ran to the front door and the dog darted after her. Once Liberty had followed her inside, she knelt down to give the dog some attention and to keep her inside. Bucky ran inside and shut the front door behind him, sliding ever so slightly on the hardwood floor. Y/N smiled up at him as she stood up and he returned her grin. As if on cue, Liberty shook off the moisture from her fur, completely coating Y/N and Bucky in more rain water and mud. They both started cracking up, laughing at both their disheveled states as the dog simply walked off to her dog bed.

Bucky stepped closer to her and placed his hands on her hips.

“You know, this look is kind of working for me…” he said, narrowing the space between them.

“Oh yeah? You into the swamp monster look?” she bantered.

“More like queen of the swamp,” he said, inching closer to envelope her lips in his. Her arms effortlessly wrapped around his neck and he pulled her in even closer, so her body was flush against his. They were cold and wet and muddy, yet there was no place they’d rather be. Bucky couldn’t believe he almost let this amazing woman slip beneath his fingers. He was savoring everything about her now: her smell, her taste, her touch. But what surprised him the most was how at ease he finally felt. The past few weeks, he’d been so tense. He was worried about Y/N, he wasn’t sleeping, barely eating, and just getting by an hour at a time. Now it was like he could finally breathe again. He didn’t realize what he was missing until he had her back. And now he never wanted to let go.

She started to pull back for a breath, but he wouldn’t let her, verbally expressing his dismay with a hummed “uh-uh.” She smiled and he kept her close, kissing her again and then moving from her lips to her cheek to her neck.

“Bucky,” she giggled. He loved hearing that sound and it just encouraged him more. “We should wash the dog before she spreads more mud around the house.”

“I don’t care about that,” he replied.

“But it’s Steve’ house and-”

“I will deal with Steve’s house later. Right now, I’m not letting go of you.” He moved in close again, seeking the soft touch of her lips. And she had no working defense mechanisms. She sighed into his mouth, loving the feeling of being back together with the man she’d been longing for over the past few weeks. But the logical side of her won over in the end.

She pulled away and Bucky shifted his attention to her jaw, planting kisses up toward her ear.

“Okay, I’ll make you a deal…” she offered.

“Mhm,” he replied, opting not to part from her skin.

“If we take a pause to wash up the dog, then we can pick this up later. In the shower.” Bucky froze considering his options. They’d never shared a shower together and it was something he’d always wanted to do but they’d never had the opportunity.

He let out a deep sigh into her neck, “You’re killing me doll.” She gently scratched the back of his neck and kissed his ear, signaling that their make out session was over for the time being. Bucky walked over toward Liberty and effortlessly picked her up in his strong arms. As he walked toward the bathroom he called out, “You better be helping me with this!” Y/N smiled to herself and eagerly ran after him.

It took all four hands to wrestle Liberty into the tub and that was only the first step. It was fortunate that Bucky and I were already soaking wet from the rain because Liberty showered us in bathwater as she splashed around in the tub. It took us a minute to find a rhythm, with one of us rinsing while the other shampooed. After about thirty minutes, I pulled the drain plug and we pried Liberty out of the tub, wrapping her in a towel. Once she was mostly dried off, we gave her a bone which she happily curled up with in her dog bed.

I leaned against the kitchen counter, taking a quick moment to catch my breath, which didn’t last very long. Bucky approached with a smirk on his face and, without a word, swept me up into his arms.

“Bucky!” I called in surprise.

“Pretty girl,” he countered, awfully pleased with himself.

“What are you doing?” I protested, as he started ascending the staircase.

“We’re getting you cleaned up.” Bucky strode into what I assumed was Steve’s bedroom, and before I could argue, he opened the door to the master bathroom and I was speechless. It was spacious to the point where it could’ve passed for a health spa. There was a giant soaking tub next to a window, with tealight candles lined up on the windowsill. Accompanying the tub was an upholstered ottoman holding a tray of bath salts, luxury oils, scrubbing brushes, and any other things you might need during a soak. In the corner was a beautifully tiled walk-in shower, complete with a rain shower head and a built in ledge that could double as a bench. Along the wall was a long countertop, with two sinks placed in front of the giant framed mirror. Before I could take in anymore, Bucky sat me on the countertop next to the sink, like I was a child and he was tending to a scrape on my knee. He walked over to the closet and pulled out two, lush looking, sage green bath towels, and hung them on the silver towel rack that was placed by the entrance of the shower.

“This is…” I said, looking around the room with wonder.

“I know. Steve takes his self care very seriously,” Bucky joked. He turned the handle in the shower and the water started flowing through onto the beautifully laid tiles, mimicking the sound of the rainforest.

Bucky made his way back over to me and I wondered what his next move would be. I was happy to sit back and enjoy the ride of whatever he had in mind. His face hovered in front of mine, as he placed his hands on the counter, his thumbs so nearly grazing my thighs. I studied his face, waiting for him to lean in and kiss me again, so that we could pick up where we left off. Instead, he planted a chaste kiss on my cheek and exited my personal space. His right hand found its way to my thigh and he slowly slid it all the way down my leg, until he was gripping my ankle. He extended my leg and brought my foot up towards his mouth, using his teeth to nip the top of my sock and carefully pull it off my foot. He planted a sweet kiss on my big toe and then repeated the process with my other foot.

Then he moved to my hands, removing the rings and bracelets I had on and placing them carefully in a small bowl on the counter. His slow, calculated movements were turning me on more than I thought they would. As much as I needed to have him, I wasn’t going to rush through this. He removed my earrings, giving one of my earlobes a playful nip, before he pulled off my blouse, planting kisses from my collarbone down to my navel. He came back up to my eye level, but his fingers were already working on the button of my jeans.

“I might need your help with this one,” he said, as he pulled down my zipper. I leaned back onto the counter and lifted my hips, allowing Bucky to pull at the waistband and slide the jeans off my legs. I sat back upright while Bucky kissed his way up my legs, taking a little extra time when he reached my inner thighs. I could see the hunger in his eyes and I knew that this teasing must be killing him, but it would all be worth it. His mouth found my bra strap and took it in his teeth as he lifted up slowly and released it so it snapped back onto my skin. His hands worked their way up my love handles and met at the clasp of my bra.

“Ah ah ah…” I chided, shaking my head before he could continue. He gave me a confused look and I merely pulled at the hem of his shirt, “You are fairly overdressed.” He let me pull the shirt up and over his head and I tossed it across the room. He leaned back in, continuing where I stopped him but I simply shook my head again. I pulled the drawstring of his sweatpants loose and tucked my fingers into the waistband and he effortlessly wiggled out of the material, leaving him stripped down to my level, clad only in his boxer briefs.

“Happy now?” he asked, with a tilt of his head.

“Almost,” I smiled mischievously. He slowly closed his eyes and sent me a toothless smile, knowing what I was getting at. When he opened his eyes back up they locked onto mine like a wolf stalking its prey. It sent a chill down my spine and all I wanted was to feel his hands on me again. He placed two thumbs into the waistband of his boxers and easily pulled them down, stepping out of them and closer towards me.

“You have some catching up to do,” he growled. I smiled as he kissed me, this time with urgency. His hands were behind my back unclasping my bra with ease and it fell to the floor. He started kissing my neck as his hands ventured south and rested on my hips. It didn’t take him long to pull at my thong, and I raised my right hip up to aid him, and he happily accepted the help.

I felt a bit of a breeze and shivered briefly, as my nipples hardened slightly due to the cool air and Bucky’s fingertips. He noticed my momentary shudder and grinned into the kiss.

“Why don’t I warm you up a little,” he suggested, sweetly kissing my jaw before shifting his attention to my pert nipples. He took each one carefully into his mouth, giving them just enough attention and then continued on his journey, eventually kneeling on the ground. I hadn’t realized that’s what he meant, but I wasn’t going to complain. He gently pulled on my legs as a signal for me to come closer which I did. He ran his tongue up my sopping wet pussy to my clit and ran circles around the sensitive bud. My head fell back instinctively, missing the feel of his touch. He dove right into my folds, exploring with his tongue and forcing labored breaths out of me.

“Bucky…” I called, running my fingers through his hair in an attempt to pull him back towards me. He took that as encouragement and increased his efforts, shooting his eyes up to watch my reaction. I let out a soft moan and pulled on his hair harder, which he seemed to enjoy.

“Bucky, stop,” I softly commanded. He immediately stopped and pulled back, looking up to see if everything was okay. “I can’t wait anymore. I need you inside of me.”

He acted quickly, standing and collecting me off the counter with ease, and carrying me into the immaculate shower. The minute we stepped under the water, his lips were back on mine and I tightened my grip on his neck, pulling him as close to me as possible. My legs were wrapped around his torso and his strong hands were cradling my lower back.

“God, I missed you so much,” he whispered into my neck.

“Show me,” I challenged, feeling bolder. Bucky reacted immediately, pressing me into the cold tiles of the shower. I let out an exhale and he took that as encouragement. He expertly shifted my position so that he had a better angle to my entrance, all while keeping me secure. And then he thrusted into me and I almost came on the spot. A moan escaped my lips and Bucky picked up his pace, grunting into my neck.

“Fuck baby,” I let out, knowing I wouldn’t last much longer.

“This one might be quick, but I’ll make it up to you.”

“I don’t care, you feel so good inside of me.” He gave me a quick love bite on my shoulder and then gently returned me to the ground.

“Turn around,” he commanded, caressing my hips with his fingertips. I placed my hands on the shower tiles and bent forward as he pulled my hips toward him.

“You know me too well,” I smiled.

“Of course I know how my girl likes it.” He didn’t give me a warning when he entered me and I let out a squeal of pleasure. He gave my ass a smack before clutching my hips tighter and increasing his rhythm.

“You’re so wet for me, pretty girl. I’ve missed your tight little cunt.” He thrust in deeply and paused, wrapping his hand around my front to play with my clit.

“Ohhhhh…” He was pushing my every button and I was nearing my climax.

“Those noises are driving me wild…” He picked up his pace again and I let out another moan. “Now be a good girl and cum for me.” That was all it took to trigger my orgasm. My back arched and I leaned further into the tile to stabilize myself while Bucky’s hands kept his strong hold on me. It all seemed to happen so quickly, as I panted and tried to bring myself back down to earth.

“Wow…” I breathed through my satisfied smile.

“I second that.” He slowly retracted and took my hand. “C’mere.” He pulled me towards him and wrapped his arms around my waist. I locked my arms around his neck and smiled up at him as he planted a few sweet kisses on my lips.

“That was amazing,” he said, connecting his forehead to mine.

“I know, we’re pretty good at that.”

“And we keep getting better.”

“You think it’s because we’re in love now?” I suggested.

“It has to be that,” he said, kissing my nose. “Also, I didn’t pull out. I’m sorry. I got caught up in the moment.”

“It’s okay, I’m on the pill so we should be fine.”

“I won’t do that without checking with you ever again.”

I placed a hand on his cheek and said, “I said it’s fine.”

“I know, but I still should’ve asked your permission.”

“Well, I appreciate that. Now can we get clean and spend the rest of the night cuddling?”

“We can do whatever you would like my dear.”

Once we finished up in the shower and dried off, Bucky lent me the T-shirt he packed and he put on a pair of sweatpants. We curled up together on the couch and turned on a rerun of Bar Rescue.

I rested my head on his shoulder and he put his arm around me and kissed my temple.

“How are you feeling, pretty girl?”

I tilted my head so that I was looking at him, “Happy.”

“That’s what I love to hear.”

“All because of you,” I smiled.

“Ah, can I bring something up at the risk of ruining the moment.”

“I don’t think anything could ruin this night for me. Unless you break up with me.”

“Well I’m never doing that. But I do think we should talk about that night.”

“Oh. Okay,” I shifted so that I was facing him, giving him my undivided attention. He collected my hands and held them tight in his.

“I know you said you pulled me out of the nightmare, but I don’t want to put you in that position again. It might not work next time. So I’m going to start up therapy again. It did help me a lot before and I only stopped going when I thought I had things under control. But I think it might be more of a lifelong thing.”

I nodded, “I think that’ll be really good for you.”

“It’s really hard for me to ask for help, but I do think it’ll make things better.”

“And I’m happy to go slow as we figure everything out. I want to make sure you feel comfortable with things.”

“Trust me, I don’t want to go slow. I’ve finally got you where I want you. But I can’t let that happen again.”

“We’ll ease back in. No sleepovers for a few weeks.”

“Well I’m not agreeing to that,” he smirked.

“What!?”

“I want to fall asleep next to you every night.”

“Yeah but-” I started to protest.

“I think we can start with staying at your house. It’s not my space and I don’t think I sleep as deeply because it's a different environment than I’m used to. Plus I’ve stayed over your place a handful of times and never had any issues.”

“Are you sure?’

“Positive,” he stated.

“Okay, we can start there and see how it goes.”

“I still want to have a back-up plan for you though. Maybe stash an air horn or something by the bed just in case. I’ll come up with something.”

I chuckled lightly, “I don’t think an air horn is going to work.”

“Why not?”

“Do you want to know what I did the first time?”

“I am curious actually.”

“First, I placed my hand on your cheek,” I announced as I demonstrated. “Then I slowly pulled you in closer,” He moved with my hand until his forehead was pressed against mine. “And then I did this,” I gently brushed my lips against his and he sat there stunned.

“Yeah, that’ll do it,” he commented with a small smile on his face.

“I thought if I fought back you would only push harder but that affection might confuse you.”

“And it worked.”

“It didn’t really confuse you, though. It sort of…calmed you. You curled into me and fell back asleep.”

Bucky looked a little stunned as he considered this, “Smart. That was very quick thinking.”

“That’s why I’m in trauma.”

“I’ll give you that. But I still want some sort of back up plan in place.”

“Well I will let you think on that and come up with a plan because you probably know better than I do on this matter.”

“I can do that. So until we have a back up plan, no more sleepovers.”

“That’s fair.”

“Tonight I’ll let you sleep in Steve’s room with Liberty and I’ll take the guest bedroom.”

She wanted to protest, badly, because she couldn’t imagine leaving his vicinity. But she chose to respect his wishes. For now, she nuzzled into Bucky’s shoulder and entangled her legs with his, enjoying every second of being in his presence.

#bucky barns x you #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes x y/n

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lovlydovlyjaycie · 4 years ago

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Ævi - Frontlines

Hey again! This will be a continued series. The first Ævi series is in my masterlist and is only four parts. This is going to be a ongoing series, so there is going to be a lot more of Ævi to come. :)

Summary: Y/n or also known as Ævi has lived through varies of world events. Now it is 1941, she has excepted that some things cannot be changed so Loki has convinced Y/n to go to New York and live a normal life, a life Y/n always wanted. Or as normal it can be, because new introductions lead to events that didn’t go down in the history books.

Characters: Bucky Barnes x reader, Loki, Steve Rogers, OC Vera

Warnings: Fluff, language, smut 18+

Part 6

What am I supposed to do? I needed to go to Vera.. There was no question about that. She needed me. But Bucky. I don’t want to leave him and I can’t take him with me. I was pacing around in my hotel room, like that would make everything fall into place. I had told Loki what had happened with Vera and he went to get boat tickets to Norway as soon as possible. But how soon would that be. How much time would I have with Bucky. I needed to pack my things. That made me stop in my tracks and walk over to my closet. I was pulling everything out and placing it in my suitcase. It started of being put in neatly, but soon enough I was throwing everything in with frustration. I was mad, mad at myself for not opening that letter sooner, mad that I had a life here, mad that I now had someone here I didn’t want to leave behind, mad with this stupid war, mad with everything that was happening around it, mad that I couldn’t do anything to about it to change this stupid war. My vision was getting blurry, when I whipped my eyes my hands were wet. I was crying. This wasn’t fair, non of it was, especially to Bucky. I love him, I love him so much. And that’s why it hurts so much. I took a deep breath, trying to gather myself. I stood up and walked to the bathroom to fix whatever make-up was out of place.

Looking at myself in the mirror I was a complete mess. My mascara was everywhere but my lashes. “Get yourself together.” I told myself. Bucky will be here any minute now, can’t be looking like this. I got some wipes and fixed myself up. Put some mare mascara on. “Better. Now stop crying. For Gods sake you’re over a thousand years old.” I said I was looking in the mirror. On the one side this shouldn’t bother me so much, I have lived through so much shit in my time and this is what is causing me to break down. And on the other side, this is who I am. I am human, I am living. With that comes, heartbreak, sadness, anger, frustration, happiness, love. I love love, just since I’ve been with Bucky I felt love in a much more intense way than I ever had before.

How am I supposed to tell Bucky. We literally just got engaged. This should be the start of something, not the end. I don’t even know for how long I’m gonna be away for. A month? A year? Till the end of the war? I closed my eyes. I already knew the answer. It would be until the end of the war. At least four more years. I sighed. It would just be four years without Bucky I tried to convince myself. “Just four years.” That is if he doesn’t join the war. I thought to myself and it made my stomach drop. I put my hand over my eyes. “Nothing will happen to him if he doesn’t join the war. He’ll be fine... He’ll be fine.. He’ll be fine Y/n. Stop worrying.” Scolding myself. I needed to calm down. Then there was a knock at the door. It must be Bucky.

I gave myself one quick look before answering the door. Putting on the best smile I had I opened the door and there was Bucky. Seeing him gave me a genuine smile. It made my stomach do flips. “Hey, darling. You look beautiful.” He said as he gave me a quick peck on my lips. He had his signature smirk on his face. “Thank you.” I told him sincerely. “So I got this for us today.” He said as he pulled two tickets from his pocket. Dancing tickets. “To celebrate our engagement.” He continued. He looked so happy. I needed to tell him about me going to Norway possibly really soon. “It’s at the same place where we met.” He told me with a big smile. I looked down not knowing what to say. “Is something wrong?” Bucky asked as he reached for my hand. “No. I love it! I just can’t believe we’re engaged still.” And I couldn’t believe we were honestly. I didn’t want to ruin this day. So I’ll tell him tomorrow or after the dance. Just not now.

The day had been perfect. We went to the same diner we did the were we met each other for the second time. We took the same walk we did as we did on our first real date. Everything was perfect. It almost made me forget that I would have to leave. Key word almost.

We were walking towards the dance hall, a lot of people were already inside. The music that was playing was fast paced. Everybody inside was having a good time jumping around, being spun or lifted in the air. Bucky was guiding us towards the bar to get us some drinks before dancing, holding my hand tightly. “What do you want sweetheart?” He asked me. “Whatever you’re having.” I answered Bucky.

He would get us some beers and we cheered. I could only gulp it down as quick as I possibly could. “Wow.” Bucky stated. “Never knew you could drink like that.” He laughed. Being a friend of Thor makes you drink like that I laughed to myself. Shit I also have not told him about me being Ævi, I am messing up in so many ways. But now I have to somehow tell him I am leaving possibly very soon. “Bucky?” I started. “Come on lets dance!” He said as he held my hand and almost dragged me to the dancefloor. There was a fast paced song on and everybody was jumping and dancing around and so were we.

After many songs there was finally a more slow one on. Bucky kept giving me a look I couldn’t quite figure out what he was thinking. “Why are you giving me that look?” I asked him trying to figure him out. “You’re just so beautiful and I am happy.” I could hear the honesty behind his voice and the need for him to get that off his chest. “I was thinking of looking for a ring tomorrow.” I looked at my hand that was resting on his shoulder. I felt awful. “Bucky? Can we talk somewhere where it is not this loud?” Bucky gave me a confused look, but nodded his head yes and started to follow me outside.

“Bucky I-..” I started and sighed. Thinking about it made my heart break. “Is there something wrong?” He asked not knowing what was going on. “Bucky I just want you to know that.. I love you, I love you so much, so much that it even hurts. And I didn’t think-..” I sighed again. Bucky had a even more confused look on his face. I walked over to him and took his hands. “What’s going on?” He asked trying to understand what my conflict was. He was looking into my eyes trying to see if the answers were there. “I-.. A long friend of mine in Norway, she.. she lost her daughter and husband recently because of the war... And I need to go see her, I need to see if she is ok.” I stammered out. “I am sorry to hear that, y/n. When are you leaving?” He asked me. “I don’t know yet, but very soon. Loki already looked at tickets for boats that go that way, but I don’t know yet what he found.” He nodded at that in understanding and held my hands a little tighter. “Do you know when you’re coming back here?” He asked unsure of himself already dreading the answer.

I closed my eyes and sighed. I knew exactly when I would be coming back, but I couldn’t exactly say how I know what I know. “I’ll come back after the war.” I looked up trough my lashes at him to see what his reaction was at that. He let go of one off one of my hands at that and rubbed is mouth in thinking. “Maybe if I join the war and somehow get stationed off in Norway we can-...” “No! No, I don’t want you to join the army Bucky. Please don’t do that.” I interrupted him, that was the last thing I wanted him to do. “But if more people join the fight it might be over sooner. They are sending out troops now from America as we speak. I also am a good fighter and a good shot.” I could only shake my head no at that. “Bucky, please don’t join the army. I am begging you don’t do it. This war.. It will not end anytime soon and a lot of people will die. I don’t want you to be one of those people.” I was all serious. If he joined the army it would break my heart. The not knowing if he was ok or not would break me. He gave in and nodded his head. “Lets go back inside and pretend there is no war going on.” Bucky said trying to reassure me.

Back inside there was a slow song on again. I could not be close enough to him. I was resting my head on his shoulder and held him a little tighter. Bucky was holding my neck with one hand and the other was on my lower back. We were so close to each other, yet so far. I felt a tear roll down my cheek. I felt helpless. I felt like I was stuck. And I hated it. I put my hand up against my cheek to wipe away the tear. I didn’t want to leave. “I love you Bucky.” I said quietly, I wasn’t even sure if Bucky could hear what I said over the music until he held me a little tighter. “I love you y/n.” He told me. I closed my eyes trying to ignore the music that was playing. I could hear his heartbeat, beating in a steady rhythm.

The walk back to the hotel had never been this long yet so fast. We were walking in circles, not wanting this night to end. But it was getting quite dark and we had to go inside at some point. “I am still looking at a ring tomorrow.” He told me as wee were nearing the hotel. That made me slightly sigh of relieve, but he didn’t know how long this war would be going on for. It wasn’t fair of me to ask him to wait and put his life on pause for me. “Bucky, I don’t want you to wait-..” I started. Bucky came to stand in front of me. “Y/n, you leaving doesn’t make me stop loving you. And I get why you don’t wanna hear this, but if I have to I will wait a hundred year or a thousand years, hell an eternity, if it all meant that in the end I would be with you. And that is what I’m gonna do whether you like it or not.” He said as he put both his hands on my cheeks. “I love you, Y/n. Now, tomorrow and forever.” Then he planted a sweet kiss on my lips. It was slow and full of want, but not of lust. As we both slowly pulled back we couldn’t let go of each others gaze. “I like that. Now, tomorrow and forever.” He smirked at that. “Well it is how I feel.” He said as he dropped his hands to mine. “I will love you now, tomorrow and forever too Bucky.” I gave him another peck on the lips as it was time to go inside of the hotel.

Before I even had the chance to open my room Loki burst out of his room. Bucky looking slightly shocked but keeping his own as Loki approached. “Where have you been?!” Loki asked annoyed. “With Bucky. Did you get tickets?” Loki looked Bucky up and down in slight disgust. He obviously didn’t like Bucky for whatever reasons he had. “Yes I did get the tickets. And you need to pack.. Now.” He demanded. “Wait.. When are we leaving?” I asked confused. “You said as soon as possible. I got tickets for tomorrow.. Morning. We leave at eight.” My eyes grew wide. I was expecting soon, just not this soon. I was at a loss for words. I felt Bucky squeeze my hand. “That’s faster than I expected.” Bucky said under his breath. I looked at out interlocked hands. “I’ll help you pack doll.” Bucky continued. “Good even a human is smart enough to know what that means.” I gave Loki a warning glare at that. I opened the door to let me and Bucky in and said goodnight to Loki.

“Ignore him, he’s... weird.” I said about Loki. “I heard that.” Loki said from the other side of the door. “Sorry again.” I said to Bucky. “I didn’t know it would be... That fast.” I said with sadness in my eyes.

The night together packing went slow. I already had a few things packed luckily. After we were done packing we just laid on the bed together. Talking about anything and everything to keep our minds of reality. After a moment of silence Bucky spoke up. “Will you write me when you’re there?” He asked. I looked up at him from where I was positioned on his side. “Of course. Everyday.” I told him and that was a promise I made to myself. “Will you?” I asked him. “Everyday.” He answered back. I leaned forward to kiss him I wanted him close, one last time before sayin goodbye. I moved myself on top of him to deepen the kiss. Bucky put his hands by my neck at the top of my dress. He slowly started to unzip my dress. Caressing my skin as the zipper went down. His touch gave me goosebumps. When the zipper was all the way down I took my arms out of my dress exposing my bra. Our lips still interlocked Bucky started to sit up. Our minds hungry for each other. It was my turn to unbutton his shirt, after I was done doing that Bucky quickly shook off his shirt and threw it on the ground. I grinded down on his lap and could feel his cock hardening quickly. Mt panties were already completely soaked and ready to take them off now. I wanted him inside of me. I wanted to feel him.

Bucky went to unclasp my bra and threw it on the ground as well. His hand left hand went right for me breast and started flicking my nipple. I inhaled deeply at that sensation of his gentle touch. He put his other arm around me and his left hand let go of my nipple to hold me around my back as well. I let out a small whine at the loss of his touch. He pulled his head back looking at me briefly before spinning me around and now I was laying on my back on the bed. He discarded of my dress and panties that were still on and he quickly took off his trousers to free his already hardened cock.

He crawled back over my naked form his mouth going right back to mine. He again took my right hand with his left and put it above my head. My other hand went to his lower back, indicating I wanted him now. I felt his tip brushing against my folds, but he was not starting yet. his right hand went down to my bundle of nerves and started to slowly rub circles. My breathing started to pick up and I let out low moans against his mouth. I went to bit my lip to keep my volume low, but Bucky quickly went to suck on my lower lip before he let go. “I want to hear you.” He whispered to me. His thumb started to rub faster circles which made me close my eyes with the pleasure I was feeling. My breathing started to pick up and my moans started to get louder the faster he went. Everything started to tingle and I felt my walls try to clench to something. I let out a loud moan and my thighs quivering as I came.

I opened my eyes searching for Bucky’s who was still looking at me. Bucky was still rubbing me and I slowly started to feel sensitive trying to close my legs. Bucky moved his hips down so I couldn’t. I could feel his tip brushing against my entrance again. I let go of his lower back to move my one free hand up to his neck. “I want you inside of me.” I told him intently. And he complied. He slowly put his length inside me, while I was adjusting to the new fulness. He was stretching my walls slowly. When he was fully situated he waited for a moment for me to fully adjust and I slowly started moving my hips and so did Bucky. I tried to move faster already feeling a new sensation build up inside of me, but Bucky put his hand down on my right leg widening me up more so he could go deeper. I put my other leg around him, pushing him down, me wanting him to go faster. “Bucky go faster.” I told him lowly. But he shook his head keeping his slow steady pace. “I want to feel you. Let me feel you.” I slowed me breathing down and started to relax into the bed more.

His thrusts were slow, but hit every spot. With every move he made his pelvis brushed against my still sensitive bundle of nerves. Bucky started kissing my sensitive spot by my neck which made this pleasure feel al the more better. My breathing started to pick up slowly again and so did his. His thrust's were picking up and hitting harder. His balls slapping against my ass as he did. As we were both coming closer to our ends his speed started to pick up more and more. Bucky groaning in my ear as he was getting closer to his end. My moans were so loud I was getting afraid someone might hear them. I felt the familiar knot form in my stomach and my walls clenching around his length. “Bucky.” Is all I had to say as I felt my walls break around him. Simultaneously I felt his cock shoot hot spurts inside of me, filling me. His thrusts loosing rhythm before he stilled. “I love you.” He told me intently as he looked me in my eyes. “Now, tomorrow and forever.” I answered back as Ii pulled him closer for a deep kiss.

...

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violentdelightsandviolentends · 10 months ago

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Honey Girl. Chapter Seven.

chapter one. chapter two. chapter three. chapter four. chapter five. chapter six. series masterlist. the playlist.

Chapter Synopsis - Everything will work out the way it’s supposed to. At least, that’s what you and Bucky keep telling yourselves.

Pairing - Dad'sBestFriend!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader - soulmate au

Warnings - smut. cursing. alcohol consumption.

Word Count - 4.8k

Author's Note - I can only apologise for the delay on this one angels!! january blues, a crazy work schedule, writers block.. they all came to play at the same time. but chapter seven is finally here!! I hope you enjoy it. thank you for the continued love on this - words can’t describe how incredible it is.

as always, if you enjoyed this, please consider reblogging!! reblogs are the only way to circulate my writing, which generates more of it. thanks, my loves!! <3

Masterlist. Inbox.

“Why aren’t you more surprised?”

Stella simply shrugs, sipping her cappuccino as if she has all the time in the world.

“Babe, with all due respect… I’ve been waiting for you to initiate this conversation for like two months.”

You look at her incredulously, fiddling nervously with a chip in the handle of your coffee cup.

“…Why? How?”

She smiles softly, reaching for your hand across the table.

“You’re miserable.”

You take a deep breath, and then another. After the fifth one, you find the courage to meet her eyes.

“How did you know?”

“Because I know you. You’re a hell of an actress, I’ll give you that.”

“It’s not you-”

“I know. Hey, I know. You don’t have to explain yourself.”

“I do.”

She waits for you, patient as ever. You’d be lying if you said the guilt wasn’t eating you up, slowly but surely from the inside out. You feel like you’ve let her down, disappointing the one person who’s given you your dream.

You realise, suddenly, that you haven't told anyone the full truth about everything. Not your Mom, not your Dad, not Lacie. Your Tethering, Bucky, the move to California - all your feelings and emotions over the past how ever many months have been bottled up and stowed away on a shelf, never to be opened. But you have the urge, now, to unscrew the cap and pour it out across the table, regardless of the mess.

So, you do.

"It's not you. You've given me everything I could have ever wanted, Stel, and I couldn't be more grateful. You know that, right?"

She nods, squeezing your hand.

"It's just been hard... emotionally. So, I, the thing is, I just..."

You inhale. You hold it for five seconds. You exhale.

"I'm Tethered. I have a soulmate, and he lives back home. We found out literally right before you called me and asked about the business. I couldn't turn you down, I knew that this was a once in a lifetime opportunity. I couldn't just let it pass me by. I knew we could do this, me and you, together. And I thought I’d be able to cope.”

You inhale. You hold it for five seconds. You exhale.

“Being away from Bucky has been the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my entire life. It’s like… I can’t breathe properly without him. Food isn’t as flavourful, colours aren’t as bright, the sun isn’t as warm. The separation is actually having physical effects that I’m not sure I can handle anymore.”

You inhale. You hold it for five seconds. You exhale.

“I’ve held out for as long as I possibly can. I was hoping that maybe it’d pass, that we’d get used to it and it’d all wear off. But it hasn’t. If anything, it’s worse than ever. The separation is ruining us both.”

You inhale. You hold it for five seconds. You exhale.

“I’m sorry. I know you’re going to tell me not to apologise, but I am. I’m sorry. You’ve given me everything and I’m just… quitting on you. I love this job so much, Stella. I can’t even find the words to describe how much. But I think either me or Bucky will break soon. And I have to prevent that from happening.”

You inhale.

Stella looks at you with so much compassion, you fight the urge to burst into tears.

You exhale.

“Listen to me, okay? You are one of the best damn bakers I have ever met in my life. No one in culinary school even came close to you. I always knew that I wanted you on my team, by my side, in my corner - in the kitchen, and everywhere else. But-"

You chew your bottom lip, wincing when you taste copper.

“We don’t have to be in each other’s pockets. We can be business partners and not see each other everyday. These are the joys of modern technology, babe. We can call, text, video chat, and then schedule in person meetings when we can. If anyone can make a cross country partnership work, it’s us. I mean, come on.”

The weight lifts from your shoulders, slowly but surely. A glowing, molten warmth trickles through your veins, hopeful and real and alive.

“And this,” she picks up your business plan, all printed and pretty. “This is air fucking tight. I’m not saying you picked the wrong career, but… business could definitely be your Plan B.”

You laugh, ignoring the way your voice cracks slightly, still choked with emotion.

“Babe, I was going to franchise the business eventually anyway. Sure, this is a little earlier than I first thought, but why the hell not? We’re successful, we’ve done so well… what’s stopping us? We know we can do this. And I trust you. So much.”

“Thank you,” you whisper, easing your death grip on her hand ever so slightly. “I thought I was gonna ruin everything.”

“You haven’t ruined anything, I promise you. This is a good thing.”

She thinks for a moment, lost in her own thoughts. Suddenly, she grins at you, nosy and mischievous.

“So a soulmate, huh?”

You groan, burying your face in your hands - but you can’t fight the smile that spreads across your cheeks.

“Yeah. It’s been… complicated.”

“He’s that super hot guy that came to see you, right? The one that looks like he could be a model?”

Laughing, you nod, making mental note to relay this to Bucky on the phone later.

“How did it happen? Was it like, a stranger on the street moment?”

“Nope,” you recall fondly. “We knew each other already. He’s my Dad’s best friend.”

Her jaw drops open, eyes flickering across your face.

“Holy shit.”

“Yeah.”

“Holy shit, babe.”

“Yeah.”

“That’s amazing. Shit, no wonder you’ve been under so much stress. What did your Dad say?”

“He… doesn’t know.”

“What?”

“We need to tell him, I know we do, but it’s just so complicated. I’m worried that it’ll change everything, and not for the better.”

It’s been eating away at you, lately. The fact that your parents don’t know originally made perfect sense, but now? It’s been almost a year. You’ve never kept anything from them for that long. Now, you’re worried that you’ll never be able to undo the damage of lying and keeping secrets from the two people you always promised never to do that to.

"Look, I know I'm not exactly qualified to give out soulmate advice, but... you can't change this. It's literally been written in the stars. Your parents will understand, okay? But the longer you wait to tell them, the worse it'll be."

“Yeah. You’re right. It’s just - it’s tough. It’s gonna change everything, forever.”

“But isn’t that the beauty of it? It’s going to change everything, forever.”

You jump out of your seat and wrap your arms around Stella, holding onto her as tightly as you can. She hugs you back fiercely, speaking a thousand words without saying anything at all.

“Proud of you,” she murmurs into your hair.

“For what?” you laugh.

“Putting yourself first. Your health, your mental wellbeing, all of it. I know it wasn’t easy.”

“Love you,” you whisper, fighting back tears of relief.

“Love you too, my baker extraordinaire.”

You sit back down and take a breath, deep and full. Relaxing into your chair, you allow yourself to finally think about the next steps.

“So, I was thinking about going home and scouting out locations. I have that list of places that you read over in the business plan, but I thought of a couple more last night a few miles further out. I’ve pre prepped a few days worth of our best sellers, so you should be good without me.”

“Of course, babe. I’ve circled a couple where I really liked the look of the listings you’ve printed, and written a couple of notes for you to look over - just logistical stuff. Go back home, see your family and your soulmate,” she smirks, raising her eyebrows suggestively, “and just relax. God knows the stress lately has taken a couple years off your life. Please, get those years back on the beach or with your man or something.”

You laugh, shaking your head. She’s right, though. The stress has been resting stagnant in your muscles, tight and wound, making everything harder. You can’t wait to sit on the sand in Bucky’s arms and feel the tension melt from your body.

“You’re the best, Stella. You know that right?”

“So I’ve been told. Many, many times.”

Hours later, Bucky watches you on video call, laptop propped up on the dresser as you pack your bags excitedly. He hasn’t stopped smiling since he picked up, anticipation of the future lighting up his bones.

✵ ✵ ·　 ✵ 　　 * · ✵

You show up at your parents house without warning.

You thought about calling first, but decided it’d be much more fun to surprise them. It’s a Friday evening, and you know they’ll both be sat out on the back deck, drinking wine and recapping their weeks. It’s getting warmer on the East Coast, the sounds of spring and summer slowly filtering through.

Your Mom throws open the door, her face lighting up with glee.

“Babygirl!”

She throws her arms around you, rocking you back and forth so forcefully you’re worried you might fall over.

“My baby,” she exclaims, beaming grin almost blinding you. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“It’s kind of a long story. I’ll tell you all about it.”

She grabs your face in her hands, forcing you to look her in the eyes.

“Are you okay?”

You nod, smiling as the setting sun warms your back.

“Yeah, Mama. I am.”

She believes you. For the first time in a long time, you believe you too.

“Come on. Your Dad is gonna be so excited to see you.”

You leave your bags in the car, prioritising seeing the man who’s currently shaking his hips to the soft salsa music that’s playing.

“Nice moves, Casanova.”

He whips his head around, laughing when he sees you stood against the doorframe watching.

“You like em? I need a partner, babygirl! Come on!”

He grabs your hands, pulling you further into the yard so you have more space. You take up a terrible ballroom dance posture with him, cackling as he dips you backwards and almost drops you.

“Don’t kill my baby, please Jack!” your Mom calls from the kitchen window.

She returns with a glass of pink wine in her hand, gesturing for you to come and get it. Your Dad spins you over to her, steadying your shoulders when you trip over his shoes.

“It’s like The Universe knew you were coming to us tonight, darling. We opened the strawberry wine and everything.”

“My favourite.”

You get comfy on the loveseat, sitting across from your parents who are pressed together on the outdoor sofa. The wine is sweet and sugary and exactly what you needed.

“So, what are you doing here, kiddo?”

“It’s a little… complicated. But the good kind of complicated, I think.”

You start at the beginning. Well, almost. You leave out the part about finding Bucky, waiting for him to be with you when you tell that part of the story. You agreed that you’d talk to your parents about your relationship together, and you’re not about to break that promise. You do, however, explain everything else to them.

They listen carefully, nodding and smiling to let you know they’re still with you. When you talk about the difficulties you’ve faced, they wear matching frowns as your Mom fights back tears. Eventually, you sit in silence, waiting for their reaction.

“I wish you’d said something sooner.”

“I know. I’m sorry. I just… I thought I could do it on my own.”

“Honey, you never have to go through anything alone. That’s what we’re here for - we’re like, your built in therapists. Both me and your Dad would have happily listened if you’d called us, no matter the time or place.”

“Thank you. Both of you.”

“So this means you’re moving home?”

You nod, trying to contain the excitement bubbling up inside of you.

“Well it’s a good job we didn’t end up renting your apartment, huh?”

“You didn’t?”

“We thought about it, but it didn’t feel right. And we wanted to see you settle down in California first, just in case. I don’t either of us were ready to see someone else in that place. It’s yours.”

“You big softie,” you tease, nudging your Dad with your foot. He grabs it and squeezes, laughing when you squirm out of his grip.

“Well this is a cause for celebration, isn’t it?”

When you were younger, you used to get embarrassed that your Mom would throw parties for everything. Now, it’s one of your favourite things about her. She’s taught you to embrace the joy of the little things in life.

“What are you thinking, Mama?”

“Tomorrow night, a few friends. I’ll make a big paella, we can drink wine, play cards… what do you say?”

“Sounds perfect.”

And it does. The ease of being back home has calmed you down, untied the knots in your shoulders. You feel warmed by love, from the inside out.

You leave your parent’s house, promising to make a dessert of some kind for tomorrow. As you drive away, you suddenly realise that you’re headed in the wrong direction. You’re not going home. You’re going to the person that feels like home.

Bucky.

✵ ✵ ·　 ✵ 　　 * · ✵

He’s waiting for you on his front porch when you pull up.

“Hi, honey baby.”

“Hi, handsome.”

You launch yourself into his arms, savouring the warmth rolling off of him in waves. He smells like fresh linen and sea salt and all your future plans.

“You felt me coming, didn’t you?”

“From a mile off.”

He’s grinning, beaming in all directions.

“Good job it wasn’t a surprise visit, huh?”

“There’s no such thing anymore.”

“Good.”

He grabs your face in his work rough hands, gazing at you as if you’re the sun. You realise, suddenly, that you are. You are the one thing that his world revolves around. And he is yours. Forever.

“You gonna kiss me, Buck, or just stare at me, hmm?”

He chuckles before leaning in to press his lips to yours. You sigh in contentment and pull him closer by his shirt, tilting your head back to let him slip his tongue into your mouth. He tastes like scotch and spearmint, a perfect picture of his evening.

“Have you been drinking alone, cowboy?”

“Needed some liquid courage. Knew you’d come by.”

“I make you nervous, huh?”

The filthy smirk written across your face sends electricity crackling across his skin, the hairs on his arms standing up.

“Thought you’d have figured that out by now.”

“You’re really blowing up my ego, you know. I make the Bucky Barnes nervous. Who’d have thought?”

He shuts you up by kissing you again, snaking his hands around your back to plaster your bodies together. You tangle your fingers in his hair, tugging on it slightly.

“You’re letting your hair grow.”

“You like it long.”

You stop for a moment, watching his face carefully.

“Yeah. I do. How’d you know?��

“You pull it more when it’s long. Can feel how much you like it.”

“You’re a menace,” you laugh. “How about you take me inside, and I’ll show you just how much I like it? Unless you wanna give your neighbours front row seats…”

He chuckles and shakes his head before throwing you over his shoulder, laughing harder when you start shrieking. He carries you over the threshold, a beautiful prediction of years to come.

✵ ✵ ·　 ✵ 　　 * · ✵

You and Bucky spend the evening in his kitchen with the windows open, watching the setting sun. The gentle ocean breeze flows through the room, tussling Bucky’s chocolate brown hair and glinting off the ice in his rocks glass.

“You want me to come with you tomorrow, when you scout locations? I’ll be your chauffeur, if you like.”

“What about work?”

“I’m the boss, baby.”

“So you keep reminding me.”

He kicks you lightly under the table, laughing when you stick your tongue out at him.

“Yeah, Buck. I’d love it if you came with. You can use your contractor knowledge and help me out.”

“It’s a date. You want me to bring my clipboard? Tape measure? Mechanical pencil?”

“You gonna bring your talking machinery too, Bob The Builder?”

Bucky stands from his chair and pulls yours out, wrapping his arms around your waist and picking you up. He spins you around before putting you down and dragging you up the stairs, kicking his bedroom door open.

He throws you onto the bed unceremoniously, chuckling when you almost bounce off. You toss your shirt at his face, before shucking off your jeans and doing the same thing. He catches them with ease, winking at you before undressing himself.

He crawls up your body, kissing any skin he can find as he goes. He starts at your ankle, before moving to your knee, your thigh, your hip, your stomach, your chest, your neck, and eventually your lips. You’re almost shaking, alive with the anticipation of having every inch of Bucky pressed against you.

“Tell me what you want, baby,” he rasps into your ear. “I’ll give it to you. Anything.”

“Just want you.”

“Need to get you ready first,” he murmurs, fingers trailing between your legs. His breath hitches when he feels how wet you are.

“Oh honey,” he groans. “You been like this all night? Hmm?”

“Since I first saw you waiting for me.”

He groans again, resting his head in the crook of your neck.

“Please, Buck. Just wanna feel you.”

Who is he to deny you when you ask so damn pretty?

“You’re killing me,” he mutters against your skin.

Bucky slides into you with one smooth thrust, biting down on your shoulder as he does it. You shudder at the feeling, and at the thought of having the imprint of his teeth on you later.

You both gasp, wrapping your arms around his neck to pull him in to you. You loop your legs around his waist, heels digging into his ass to press him even closer.

“Fuck me,” you choke out. “Need it, Buck.”

“My needy girl,” he chuckles lowly. “Gonna give you everything.”

Bucky retracts his hips before thrusting back into you, deep and full. You whine, and he’s convinced the sound will never be matched. It’s like angel song, rose tinted and heavenly.

He fucks you into the mattress, long, slow thrusts that make you want to cry a little. You’re not sure you’ve ever felt so connected to him - every single part of you touching his, bodies plastered together and souls intertwined.

He presses open mouthed kisses into the crook of your neck, right into your sweet spot. When he feels you getting close, he dances his fingers down your body and circles your clit, languid but precise. Your back arches as you find your release, clawing your nails down his back and locking your ankles around his hips.

“Oh fuck, honey - fuck.”

Bucky finishes with a shudder, sinking his teeth back into your shoulder. His raspy groans hit your ears just right, sweat dripping down onto your dewy skin.

“Love you, baby. Fuck, I love you.”

You’re both panting, trying to catch your breath as you come down from your highs.

“I love you too,” you giggle, pressing kisses to his damp forehead.

He collapses his weight onto you, chuckling when you groan. You push him off so he can lie next to you, strong arm thrown over your stomach as he pulls you in close.

You stay tangled for a while, letting the breeze from the window cool you both down. Bucky traces absentminded patterns across your back, rough fingertips sending goosebumps over your skin.

“I’m excited for tomorrow,” you murmur, keeping the volume low.

“Me too. Feels like a big step for our future, doesn’t it?”

“I just never imagined I’d have… this. You, the job I’ve always dreamed of… it doesn’t feel real. I mean, we’re going to look at places for a second location of my business. Who ever could have predicted I’d say that sentence?”

“Everything works out the way it’s supposed to. I told you that, that night on the beach. Before we knew. Remember?”

“I remember,” you smile, recalling that evening. You’d felt so inexplicably connected to Bucky that day. Little did you know what was to follow.

You fall asleep wrapped up in Bucky’s arms, warm and content.

You’ve never known happiness like it.

✵ ✵ ·　 ✵ 　　 * · ✵

The day flies by with Bucky by your side.

You’re a little out of your depth, admittedly. You don’t know much about real estate, or what makes a viable location for a bakery. But Bucky helps - explaining what to avoid, warning signs to look out for, checking out all of the boring stuff like gas mains and water pipes and backup generators. He never patronises you, even when you look at him like a deer in headlights. He clarifies himself when you become unsure, laying out explanations carefully and simply. He’s the perfect right hand man.

“You almost ready, honey?”

“Yeah Buck, give me one second!”

You walk into the kitchen where Bucky’s leaning against the counter, beer in hand. He’s in loose jeans and a linen button up, the white shirt beautifully showing off his tanned skin. He’s got several buttons undone, toned chest peeking through. He looks effortlessly perfect.

You stop in front of him, fixing the buckle on your sandals. You look up at Bucky to find him staring at you, open mouthed.

“You alright, handsome?”

“You look… you look - fuck, you look gorgeous.”

Heat rises up your skin, still so susceptible to his compliments.

“Thank you,” you whisper, leaning up to press a gentle kiss to his lips. “I love you.”

“Love you too,” he chuckles into your mouth.

Bucky rests a hand against the base of your throat, pulling you into him. His other hand plays with the hem of your dress, your skin burning where his fingers brush. You kiss him back harder, groaning when he nips at your bottom lip. He sucks on your tongue, and your knees buckle.

You pull back suddenly, putting three feet of distance between you.

“We need to go.”

Your hair is tousled, chest rising and falling at a rapid pace as you try to regain your composure. Bucky smirks at you, laughing when you flip him off.

“Come on. My parents and paella await us.”

✵ ✵ ·　 ✵ 　　 * · ✵

Your Mom has done it again.

Golden lights adorn the beams of the deck, the table littered with flowers and wine glasses begging to be filled. There’s already a few people scattered around the yard, chatting and laughing in the warm evening air.

“Oh baby, you look so beautiful.”

Your Mom engulfs you in a hug, pulling back to look at you from a distance. You’re wearing a yellow sundress, form fitting in all the right places. The skirt blows in the gentle breeze, fanning around you like an angels halo.

“This place looks amazing, Mama. I made you a tropical tart - it’s pineapple and coconut, with a mango coulis.”

“Oh, it’s gorgeous. I’ll put it in the fridge and get you some wine, honey. Buck, you want wine or beer?”

“Wine, please Lori. You need a hand?”

“If you’re offering,” she winks, laughing when he pokes her in the side as they leave towards the kitchen.

“Your father says you’re moving back home.”

You turn around to see Cora looking at you expectantly. You haven’t seen her since the incident that evening months ago.

“Uh, yeah. I love California, but I think I outgrew it after culinary school.”

She nods at you in faux sympathy, overbearing and sickly sweet.

“Aw, sweetie. Sometimes, things just don’t work out the way we hoped, huh?”

“Mhmm,” you hum noncommittally. “Yeah, I guess.”

You look for an exit, but she rubs your arm in support, pulling you back.

“I saw you today, you know.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yes! Down on Maple, by the corner. You were with Bucky.”

You freeze suddenly, blood running cold. You and Bucky are always affectionate, whether you mean to be or not. It’s just the way it is, being alongside your soulmate. Of course, Cora doesn’t know this. All she’s seen is you, out in town with your Dad’s best friend, looking cosier than platonic.

Your ears are ringing. You wonder, for a second, if you’re experiencing deja vu.

“Yeah, he… he has contracting experience. Just needed a second opinion. I’m no builder, after all.”

You force a laugh, willing the ground to swallow you up.

“You two are friends? You seem pretty close.”

She’s watching you, waiting for a reaction. You don’t give it to her.

“I’ve known him for a while, I see him often. He’s a good friend to my Dad, so you can imagine we know each other pretty well by now.”

“Yeah. It sure looked like it.”

You’re wracking your brain, trying to understand what she saw. Then it hits you.

On the corner of Maple is a florist’s, alive with blooming flowers and plants of every colour. You’d been admiring the tulips when Bucky had wrapped his arms around you from behind, whispering in your ear about how you’re the prettiest flower of all, honey.

There’s no running away from this. She’s caught you, in broad daylight.

“We’re friends,” you reiterate, praying for mercy.

You shoot her a fake smile before turning on your heel, making a beeline for the kitchen to find your Mom. When you get there, you gulp down your entire glass of strawberry wine, begging the sugar to lift your mood and calm your nerves.

The rest of the night goes off fairly smoothly.

You eat paella and fruit tart, drink wine, laugh with your parents and their friends. Bucky occasionally slips a hand beneath the table, squeezing your thigh in silent reassurance. You tangle your fingers with his for a moment before letting go, praying everyone else is none the wiser.

Every time Cora opens her mouth, your chest constricts a little. But she seems to have learnt her lesson somewhat, only speaking to tell obnoxiously long and tangent filled stories and offer comments no one asked for. Eventually, you all disperse from the table, making conversation elsewhere.

“What’s on your mind?” a low voice rasps in your ear.

You’re sat on the swing in the corner of the garden, watching the world go by. Bucky snakes his arm over the back of it, fingertips brushing your shoulder.

“Cora saw us today. Think she knows.”

“She’s a fucking nuisance.”

You laugh, the sound vibrating through Bucky’s bones.

“Yeah, she is. She’s also a gossip. She won’t keep her mouth shut for long if she thinks she’s sitting on something newsworthy.”

He thinks for a moment, taking a deep breath.

“So we tell them.”

You lean back into Bucky’s arm, inhaling the familiar scent of peace.

“We should do it as soon as possible.”

“How about tomorrow?”

You nod, biting your glossy lips.

“Yeah. We need to do it sometime, and we’ve delayed the inevitable for long enough. We’ll do it tomorrow.”

Bucky nudges closer to you, so your sides are pressed together.

“It’ll all work out the way it’s supposed to, honey girl.”

You smile gently.

“I know. I don’t think I believed you the first time you said that to me. But I do now.”

“You and me against the world, baby.”

“You and me against the world, Buck.”

It truly feels like it, at the moment. You and Bucky against the world.

tag list part one

@lillytracy6996 @securegorgon @roostersforevergirl @povlvr @val-writesstuff @dreadfulxives18 @1deadpool26 @abbygraceasd @nyutasgirl @mavrellover91 @winterslove1917 @f-this42 @skewedcherries @noisesinthedark @kandis-mom @black-cat-2 @harrystylesandthegoobs @vladsgirlxx @h0nestly-though @arienotari @nash-dara @wandaneedstherapy @galaxy-dusk @justherefortheficandsmut @cremebruleequeen @cjand10 @buggy14 @avengers-fixation @blueberrybambi @beautiful-loserr @sarah1barnes @miss-rebel-without-applause @ragingrainbowshipl @shamrockqueen @savemeroman @jenn-f @8crazy-freak8 @daddyjackfrost @openup-yourmind @adangerousbalance @mandijo17 @daddylorianisastateofmind @rcarbo1 @casa-boiardi @spideegwen @navs-bhat @mssbridgerton @asuni921 @middle-of-the-earth @mfrnchsk

#tag list reblog

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ksgeekgirl · 6 years ago

Text

One Year Anniversary

Submission for #kaits8kangstchallenge. So sorry to Kait (@bionic-buckyb) for the lateness of this post, but hope you like it. No beta, and lots of caffeine, so all grammar errors and type-o’s are mine. Only my second piece i’ve let out, so please be gentle ;)

Word Count: 1833 (cause i’m a long winded bitch)

Warnings: language, hint o’smut - there is more to this if anyone is interested in reading it.

IMAGE IS NOT MINE. I FOUND IT ON GOOGLE WITH NO CLEAR SOURCE. IF IT’S YOURS, PLEASE LET ME KNOW AND I’LL GIVE YOU CREDIT.

One-year punch

12 months punch

365 days punch

One trip around the fucking sun.

With one final punch I fell against the heavy bag, wiping my hair back as sweat drips off the tip of my nose onto the puddle i’m making on the mat. Out of, habit, i rub the fresh scar on my side, only the bumpy flesh and tinge of pain reminding me it was there. When I joined the Avengers a year ago, I didn’t think this was how my “work anniversary” would go.

Alone. Six months after a gunshot wound. Being a mere mortal among heroes wasn’t all it was cracked up to be.

So, here I am. Perfectly healed, in fact I was in better shape than Nat currently, but I was here holding down the fort while the rest of the team was out on a mission. All because the good Captain didn’t think I was “up to the challenge.”

Bottom line. Steve Rogers doesn’t like me.

It’s taken me a full year to admit it, because everyone likes me. But not Steve. He’s never liked me and he doesn’t want me on the team. But here I am.

When we first met, I was in awe of him--and it wasn’t the physical aspect. Not that I didn’t notice. I mean have you seen him? WOW. I MAY have even gawked seeing him shirtless for the first time. In fact, I had to keep myself from petting him, but I digress. The real reason for the awe was that he has integrity. Real, honest to god, integrity.

In a world of instagram stars and man buns, old-fashioned integrity is in short supply. It only took one conversation with Steve - not Cap but STEVE - to know that he had integrity in spades. He doesn’t just treat people with respect. He actually respects them.

Except for me.

To him, Y/FN Y/LN was just one more asset that needed protection. He is warm and engaging with other team members. But when interacting with me, he’s ALL business. No eye contact. No encouragement.

And i’ve tried. I’ve managed to find my way with all the team members. I won Thor over with baked goods, who knew the god of Thunder had a sweet tooth. I got on Bruce’s good side by digging in and learning the science and not just glazing over. Hell, I trained so hard that i could spar with Bucky when it came to knives.

The Winter Fucking Solider calls me doll and is more encouraging that Steve. Nothing I do is ever enough for him.

Y/N picked the wrong movie. Y/N cooked the wrong food. Y/N isn’t ready for the mission and should stay here. Every disappointing look and backhanded comment was a dagger that twisted, not only in your gut but in your heart.

And what happened when you did finally go on a mission? Steve was proved right and you were shot. Never mind that you were able to get the files the team went in for while bleeding out. Or that you had your wits about you enough that you landed a knife in the jugular on the bad guy before passing out. Nope, getting shot = not ready to Cap.

Following that mission, I was in the hospital for a week. I lost a lot of blood and it was touchy for a while. I don’t even remember the first two days, but when I came too the entire team took turns staying with me.

Except Steve.

Oh, he came by. Stood in the door. Asked if I was okay. Chastised me for taking a stupid risk. But that was it.

In the six months that followed, I have completely recovered - ask the heavy bag and Tony’s many doctors - but still no mission. Only Captain America can green light you returning to the field. And even with integrity...Captain America couldn’t see past what Steve Rogers thought.

So with that, i’m done trying.

I took a deep breath, resting my forehead on the bag, the weight of the last year weighing on me and the realization that I wouldn’t likely have a second anniversary heavy on my heart. Taking a pull off my water bottle I pushed the bag away, making it swing as I delivered a hard one-two punch. Imagining Steve’s face as the jab landed.

“Fuck Steve Rogers”

“Language”

A chill ran up my spine as the deep baritone echoed through the training room. i can’t catch a break with this man. I took a deep breath and went back to swinging, the sound of my punches landing filling the silence.

“Welcome back Captain. Hope the mission went well.”

Steve walked over and steadied the bag. Holding it as i kept swinging, the chink of the chain holding the bag silenced. The thud of my punches matching my heartbeat.

“It was successful,” he quipped “nobody got shot.”

I stopped briefly, snarling at him as I kneed the bag, pushing him back a little. “Well good, we sure can’t afford to have two of us out for six months, but then again everyone else heals faster don’t they?”

“Y/N”

I could see the muscle in his jaw flex. A sure sign he was frustrated with me. I punched even harder, my shirt soaked through with sweat. Shoulders and thighs burning...I was going to pay for this in the morning.

“Y/N. Stop.”

But I couldn’t make myself. I aimed a side kick at the bag, and Steve to be honest, but he’s a damn super solider and caught my leg. His hand on my calf sending shivers up my spine as I looked at him.

“Let go of my leg Cap.”

“We need to talk Y/N...”

“Fantastic. Let. Go. Of. My. LEG.” I yanked my leg from his hand as I said this, walking away. I kept my back to Steve as I gathered my emotions, beginning to unwrap my hands. “What do you want to talk...”

Steve cut me off, “Y/N you are training entirely too hard. You could aggravate your injury. You’re not healed yet.”

“But actually I am Steve.” I drop down on the bench as I thrown the wraps in the trash. I bend over and begin unlacing my shoes while I talk.”

“EVERY doctor in Tony’s employ has given me the green light.” I take off my left shoe and throw it down. “In fact, EVERY fucking physical therapist in this tower has said that they don’t need to see me anymore.” My right shoe joins the pile, bouncing as I throw it.

“So,” I pick up a towel, wiping my face and arms, “unless you’re now DOCTOR Captain America, I AM OK.”

Breathing heavy, more from anger than from the work out, I pull off my t-shirt and throw it into the hamper. As usual, Steve isn’t making eye contact but staring in the mid-distance at the mat. Letting out a big sigh, I run my hands through my sweaty hair and cross my arms under my breasts.

“Can you at least look at me when you fire me Steve?”

His head snaps up, finally rewarding me with eye contact. The full brunt of his blue gaze causing me to squirm a little and wonder if I had escalated this too quickly.

“Fire you?” He asks a little confused before letting loose a bitter laugh. “Why in the world would I fire you Y/N?”

“Isn’t that what you wanted to talk to me about? Letting me go?” Doubt starts to creep in as I gnaw on my lower lip, watching him.

“No. Not at all. I wanted to talk to you about...I mean...I think we need to talk about...really I need to tell you how...” Steve shoves his hands in his pockets, looking around. Finally he squares his shoulders and walks over, so close to me that I can see the flecks of green in his cornflower eyes. “We need to talk about us.”

“And by us, you mean how you can barely tolerate me?” I retort, holding my ground. “Don’t waste your time Steve. You win, I’m done trying.”

“Wait. What?” Steve looks genuinely confused. I feel myself soften, thinking this is the break i’ve wanted but there is no time to soften now.

“Come on Steve. I can tell by the way you look at me.”

“And how exactly am I looking at you Y/N?” Steve is standing in full Captain America pose, hands on his hips, feet spread wide, jaw clinched. The only sound in the room is the fans whirring and our breath. So it’s come to this.

“You look like you’re going to punch me,” I smart back, my chin tilting up. A challenge against my better judgement.

“I was actually going to kiss you, but if you’re into that sort of thing then i’m out.”

My eyes widened, stammering as I looked up at him, “What? I’m so confused. You what?” My brain unable to complete a thought.

Steve reached out and took my hand in his, thumb running over my knuckles red from my workout, a half smile on his face.

“Y/N, it’s not that I don’t like you. I like you too much. You’re smart. You’re funny. You’re fearless -- even when you should be. You remind me of Peggy, but not in an ‘old flame way’ but in a ‘there’s a woman that could challenge me’ way.”

As i stare at him, like a guppy gasping for air as he moves his free hand to cup my cheek. Caressing my jaw as he tilts my chin up.

“When you go shot, I was terrified. I couldn’t do anything but sit there. I couldn’t even donate blood.” He chuckled at the dumbfounded look on my face. “So, I took it out on you. I can’t be scared if you aren’t in danger. But that isn’t fair.”

“So, our friends took matters into their own hands and told me that i talked to you or they would.” Steve let out a big breath, resting his forehead on mine. “THAT’S what I wanted to talk to you about.”

i shook my head slightly, eyebrows knitted together.

“But you don’t like me...” my brain unable to catch up with what he is saying.

“Maybe this will help you understand.”

With that, Steve leans down. His breath ghosting over my face as my eyes close. I’m fairly sure i’m hallucinating until I feel that pressure of his soft lips against mine. The touch is like plugging into an electrical socket as I let out a small gasp. Steve seizing the opportunity to brush his tongue against my lower lip, coaxing my mouth open. I feel him smile against me as our tongues meet, the knuckles of his hand trapped between us grazing my nipples through my sports bra.

It was too much.

I slowly step back, our lips the last thing to separate. I needed physical distance to process everything. My eyes slowly blinking as I look up at Steve, a slow smile spreading across his face.

“Y/N...are you okay?”

Then, with all the polish an sophistication I could muster, I find my voice.

“I’m sweaty.”

Really? Not what I meant to say. Nope. The only explanation is that Steve Rogers short circuited my brain. And just like that he starts laughing. It’s the most joyous thing i’ve ever heard, and i’m not even upset that he’s laughing at me.

“Y/N if i’d have known that was all it too to get you to shut up, I’d have done that months ago,” he smarts off while wiping tears of laugher from his cheeks. My nostrils flare a little as I land a good punch on his arm in response. Getting his laughter under control he rests his hands on my waist, thumbs rubbing little circles on my skin. “Seriously though, are you okay?”

I smile, tentatively moving my hands to his biceps. A small portion of my brain, registers that they feel better than they look.

“Yeah. I’m fine. Surprised, but fine.” Biting my lip, I look up a smile playing across my lips. “But I am sweaty.”

“Very!” He leans forward, placing a kiss on my forehead before stepping back. “You should probably go shower.”

“Good idea.” I turn and heads towards the elevator and my rooms, leaving Steve standing in the center of the mat. At the elevator doors I push the button and look over my shoulder. Pulling my hair to the side as I shoot Steve a wink.

“You coming Cap or you just gonna stand there?”

The slap of his feet hurrying across the mat letting me know that my Avengers anniversary wasn’t turning out as bad as I thought.

Tags: @bionic-buckyb @heather-lynn

#kaits8kangstchallenge #@bionic-buckyb

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valhallaas · 6 years ago

Text

Static {part 3}

Hello again! Here is the final part to this little series for @bionic-buckyb ‘s angst writing challenge! Thank you for taking the time to read it.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader

Warnings: language and implied smut

Word Count: 2,042

Prompt: “Your legs bleeding.”

“Oh, really? I hadn’t noticed that half of my goddamned blood was flowing out of my leg, thanks for letting me know.”

Part 2

“We’re tearing that fucking place apart.”

“Steve—”

“No, Natasha. I don’t care what you have to say. Do you see her? Do you see what they’ve fucking done to her? I can’t. I just—I can’t.”

“All right, Stevie. Try to relax. Get some rest. I’ll take next watch.”

Steve sighed. A barely audible “Yeah, right,” passing from his lips.

You had no idea what was going on. All you knew was that you hurt. Everything hurt. Your skin, your leg, your eyelids every time you blinked. But you weren’t really blinking. Your eyes were too heavy, and the outside world was still too bright. You weren’t ready for all that yet. Hearing Steve’s voice, though, that about killed you. You had seen Steve at a few of his lowest points; that’s normally when you found your way to each other. Never had you heard him like this. So…so down and utterly broken.

To know it was over you made it so much worse. Why couldn’t you stay away? Why couldn’t you put your feelings for him aside like you did everything else? Why did the thought of shutting him out hurt so goddamn much? So many whys and not enough answers. You’d be screaming and pulling at your roots if you could. You liked knowing all the answers, even if all you were doing was pretending to. But this, this was hard.

It was like Bucky was attuned to you. You weren’t conscious to the outside world, but he knew you were awake; listening. You heard him heave out a heavy sigh when the door closed. That was when you heard the faint beeping of the heart monitor. That’s all it took for you to piece it together. They’d gotten you out and were guarding you at the Avenger’s compound. Stupid, stupid, stupid. You weren’t safe anywhere with anybody. Not anymore.

“Y’know how hard it was to get you out of there with a fucked-up arm, Y/N?” Bucky drawled. Yeah, he definitely knew you were listening. “You and that damn pride. Y’also know that when you use your ability, it leaves an energy behind? I can feel it pulsing in my arm. The closer I am to you, the stronger it gets.”

Leaves an energy behind? That was new. Made sense and was probably how they had managed to find you. You needed to get up now. Focusing all your energy you tried opening your eyes. You knew the room was going to blinding, the white walls and their lack of décor trying to take out your retinas. Squinting, you were amazed it had worked. The world was blurry, and your eyes burned in their sockets. A frown formed on your lips when you focused on Bucky who was staring smugly at you.

“You and that damn pride.”

Your eyes narrowed. That was twice now—you may be in a hospital bed, but you could still shock the shit out of him. You and Bucky Barnes walked a very thin line between love and hate. The feeling in your gut told you that it only leaned towards love because of who his best friend was. Which for you, was saying a lot.

“How long are you going to make him wait before you tell him I’m awake?”

He leaned forward, handing you a cup of water that you took gratefully. “Figured you’d want a minute to breathe before he started rattling off atcha.”

“I tried—”

“I know you did. I told him that—”

“—but it doesn’t matter that you did. You know Steve,”

There was light tapping on the door, the silhouette of a super soldier making your insides turn. It had been a long time since he had made you feel anything that resembled nervous. Your eyes flashed to Bucky’s, who simply shrugged his shoulders. You bit down on your chapped lip, readying yourself.

“She’s awake, Steve.” Bucky called out when you finally nodded your head.

“Are you alright?” Steve blurted out as soon as he was through the door.

You snorted. “Yeah, Stevie. Feeling just fucking peachy.”

You yelped when Bucky flicked the arch of your foot. The both of you glaring at each other, neither one of you backing down. It was only the feeling of Steve’s callused fingertips tracing your jawline that pulled your attention back to him. Your breath caught in your throat at the tender look in his eyes. His blue gaze heavy on you, searching over your face—taking in every flaw that made you, well, you. You weren’t sure you’d ever felt more vulnerable in your life. Damn him, damn him to hell.

“Y/N are you alright?”

“I—I will be.”

You could feel him struggling. Struggling to get the words out. He wanted to know how they found you. He wanted to make sure you’d be okay. He wanted to keep you there with him. You were sure that Steve Rogers had been created specifically to watch you burn. That’s what if felt like. There was a spark between the two of you; always has been. The energy—the static—it buzzed between you freely. Everything about you called out to him, and he always came willingly.

Your lip quivered, eyes ignoring both gazes that were burning into you. You felt it this time. You felt it deep in your bones—in your very being. This was it. This was the last goodbye. There was no way either of you could keep this up. There would be no fighting about it. You’d get out of the med bay, you’d have one last night together. Then you’d be like a phantom, a ghost, a dream that no one was sure if you were actually real or not.

***

You had never been in the Avengers tower. Not with all of them in it, anyway. You took in everything around you. It was hard to miss the fact that it was Stark money that built the place. High ceilings, open layout, and floor to ceiling windows. Everything screamed ‘look at me’. A frustrated sigh escaped you when a spasm shot through your leg, making your knee and hip give out at the same time. You would have completely collapsed if it hadn’t been for Steve walking next to you—to make sure that exact thing didn’t happen. You didn’t miss him shake his head before he was swooping you up and tossing you over his shoulder along with your bag.

“Steven Grant,” you bit out, your face flushing from slight embarrassment and the fact that all your blood was rushing to your head.

“Y/N,”

Never one to miss out on an opportunity, you smacked your hand hard against Steve’s backside, sending small shocks up his spine. You snickered when he cursed lightly under his breath. For being a soldier, he sure did have a mouth like a sailor. Not that you were complaining.

“Why are you always causing trouble, huh?”

“Only for you, boy wonder. You make it too easy.”

A beat of silence passed when you finally made it to Steve’s room. Your eyes held a promise of mischief, a rumble of laughter echoed off the walls when he set you to your feet. He knew your tricks and he delighted in them—whatever they were at the time. Steve didn’t miss the familiar edge that usually carried with you was now no where to be seen. Even though you were the one to set the pace, to make the rules as you went along, you were also putty in his hands. That never happened. Not once in your time together had you ever given him complete control. Steve thought on it only for a moment before your lips were wrapped around him nice and pretty; everything but you left his mind.

There you were again. Watching the stupid sunrise from the warmth and comfort of Steve’s bed. You were arguing with yourself. You needed to leave, but would it really kill you if you stayed only five more minutes? No, it wouldn’t kill you, but it’d put you in the hospital for almost a week. You sighed, thumping your head against the pillows. You had told yourself you weren’t going to fight it—you weren’t going to fight him. It was just so damn hard. It was hard to leave someone you loved behind. It was even worse when you didn’t want to admit that you were in love with them.

But you never would have to admit it, Steve already knew. He stirred against you, rough fingers tracing patterns on the bare skin of your hipbone. Your eyes fluttered shut, taking in the feeling. It was the little things, you think, that you were going to miss the most.

“Y/N,” Steve whispered, breaking the resemblance of cloud nine that had been cloaking you.

“This has to be the last time.”

“Y/N,”

You shook your head, tears starting to roll down your cheeks like the rain falling from the clouds outside. When the hell did those get there? Did it really matter? God, it wasn’t like you wanted it to be this way. If you had it your way, Steve would never leave your side. You’d be an Avenger and they’d all have to learn how to deal with your bullshit. But it wasn’t an ideal world. You got screwed over more often than not, and Steve—Steve deserved so much better than a runaway science experiment.

“I love you, you know? You deserve the goddamn world, Rogers.”

“And what do you deserve, Y/N? When is it going to end?”

You shrugged, “When I’m dead.”

“Is that supposed to be fucking funny?”

“It’s the truth! It doesn’t matter how you twist it, Steve. They know how to hurt me now, you can’t keep me safe.”

“Of course I can keep you safe!” He all but snarled, pushing off the bed and away from you. “I keep the people I love safe, Y/N. Why can’t you fucking see that? What is it going to fucking take?”

The air between the two of you was charged, you could hear the faint crackles from the static in your ears. You sat up slowly, grabbing your underwear off the floor and began gathering the rest of your clothes. You were pretty sure you were leaving a trail—silent sobs shaking your shoulders, tears not stopping no matter how harshly you wiped them away. Nothing hurt as much as this did. You’d take that fucking shot in the leg over again a thousand times than have to do this just this once.

“I’m sorry.” You said softly, once your boots were on and laced up.

Your hair was pulled into a messy knot on the top of your head. Your eyes red and puffy, focused on the ground and not on the man standing in front of you. You flinched when his bare feet came into view, his body heat washing over you like waves. You weren’t even sure he had put any clothes on and you really didn’t want to find out. Only one that kept running through your head in a constant loop. Get out, get out, get out. You were starting to feel like a caged animal and that was never good.

“When you step out that door, you aren’t coming back.”

You didn’t know how Steve manage to make those words sound like both a question and a statement. The ice in his voice pierced your heart. There was no one to blame but yourself.

“No.”

He let out a staggered breath. “Okay.”

With that he left you to it. He made his way to the bathroom, shut the door and locked it. You heard the shower turn on, you heard the shattering of the bathroom mirror, you heard the pain pouring out of him as he broke down twenty feet away from you. Standing on shaking legs, you wiped furiously at your eyes, picked up your bag and left the room. All you had left behind was your favorite lipstick, and a man that nobody thought could break.

#static part three #kaits8kangstchallenge #bionic-buckyb #writing #angst challenge #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers #well this was fun #static #mine

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