#you should be able to be independent
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#im really tired of people being like#why do you want a bf so bad its not gonna fix your life#you should be ok being alone#you should be able to be independent#bitch i CAN be independent. i have been my whole life#i just also really wwnt someone to cuddle and care for#and i cant fucking do that on my own now cant i#jfc
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hey, maybe a hot take, but I think the best relationships are the ones where one character isn't just the other's romantic interest, they have more arcs than that, yk
#i swear i can't believe there are people who say “jay just being nya's boyfriend is great bc she's been a love interest for so long”#like. dude. if you have to downgrade one so the other can shine then. it doesn't work.#both characters should be able to be their own characters on their own#jay hasn't had a dedicated arc for himself since. s1 and his coming to terms with his parents arc. soo#I think mayybee#it's better to have female characters who can have their own independence without applying the same treatment to their partner#im just rambling. god. fandom jaya. you are something#early nya treatment was horrible i know#but at least Nya has had like. 3 arcs related to her powers (5. 14. 11)#arcs related to finding out what happened to her family. improving her relationship with her mother and accepting their relationship.#Jay sure has had... his arc with Cole in s4. which also related to the love triangle
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Tuvok & Seven of Nine should have been overbearing co-parents to the borg children
#non romantic co-parents and they won't even admit they're friends (they don't have* friends! they don't need friends!)#star trek voyager#they are organizing a joint schedule they have a shared space google doc#Seven of Nine#Tuvok#They are both overbearing in different ways <3#I think Tuvok is an excellent father and also that he would not be able to parent every child effectively - especially non Vulcans#Meanwhile Seven is like 'Children are basically little employees I have to train yes?'#Chakotay: You're not going to be raising this children...alone. will you??#Seven: Of course not. / Chakotay: Thank G- / Seven: Commander Tuvok will assist me.#Chakotay: -the most forced smile ever- o h h........#*spoiler: They're very good friends#I think Tuvok would want them to be better behaved than they are but know that children are unpredictable to a degree and they've#been through a lot meanwhile Seven really has no reference for what children are supposed to be do and act like#besides. Seven doesn't need to be a mother. She's like twenty something and newly independent - she should have been at the club instead of#performing femininity so she could be a ''''''real woman''''''#Stop making female characters mothers.......its enough.#None of the VOY women should have been mothers. Maybe Kes - she seemed like she maybe wanted kids. I could see Kes being a good mom#down the line (not in Elogium I liked that episode and its ending) but none of the rest of them needed#or seemed to particularly want that
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new goal in business major studies: find a cruelty free way of scamming rich people
#ok so far we got that luxury is mostly about pricing the brand itself independently of the production of the good#so 20000 dollars for a bag sounds like a scam bc in its core it literally is luxury product is just a fancier way of saying it#and logically raw materials + appropriate payment for design and craftsmanship cannot cost 20000 or some shit#so theoretically (and very ironically) luxury market is a very legitimate way of scamming the rich#and the quality of the product is replicable for much much lower prices so as long as you brand it differently#even the not so rich should be able to access almost the same product as long as it is branded differently#so the question of alienation of the worker from the product is at least alleviated#also none of this makes sense so just skip it#im just loving the idea of scamming rich fucks#bc i started a training on luxury market and none of this shit is sensible to me and it is so funny that it is important to a small group
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vent incoming:
got my grades back for my courses last semester and most of it was to be expected, mostly A's, maybe an A-, etc. but i honestly can't get over the fact that my independent study (the buddy cole documentary) was for some reason given a B. like sure getting a B isn't bad per se, I usually get at least one B every semester and i honestly don't really care about what my exact gpa is as long as i can graduate, but come on. this school put me through months of psychological torment over this project and didn't even have the nerve to give me a B+??? i'm still coping with the self-doubt they forced on me and this bullshit is not helping!!
#honestly it's kind of hilarious ngl. especially bc i also got my documentary work counted as an independent study the previous semester#and the previous semester even tho i barely worked on the doc itself#(mostly just planning and putting together the crowdfunding which was still a lot of work but like compare it to the past few months)#they were willing to give me an A (my school doesn't do A+ so this is the highest mark possible)#vs this semester. like i'll admit my final assignment was late and could have been more polished#but i was literally on tour in documentary-mode 24/7 for several weeks. i filmed an entire comedy special! i put together a live interview!#not to mention having to fucking negotiate with my own college censoring the footage they'd promised me of an event i put together#and play nice with a professor who literally outed me on twitter in an attempt to cancel one of my best friends#at this point the ''B'' feels more like a petty grudge than anything else#like ok we can't get away with *actually* fucking over jessamine's grades bc clearly ze did do the work. but let's just give zir a B#like i will admit the audio quality in my final isn't great. and i could have used more polished footage in some sections#but counterpoint: 100+ students were arrested at a protest while i was editing and i was having a mental breakdown#the fact that i finished *anything* is goddamn impressive especially after they essentially conditioned me to hate myself any time i was#working on a project i loved!!!#due to the aforementioned student arrests my college did put out an option where we could change any letter grade this semester to pass/fai#so anything passing wouldn't impact our gpa if we didn't want it to. so i could just change the B to a ''pass''#but really what's the point. ''B'' is still a good grade and my GPA is fine (3.65 on a 4.0 grading scale. 2.0 is required to graduate)#it just sucks that after what i went through last semester i feel like nobody takes it seriously#i was reminiscing earlier about how it's honestly kind of funny how after that professor outed me on twitter#i was at the hotel with scott like an hour later sobbing and having an existential crisis about my relationship to gender#and scott was so supportive but also awkwardly being like#''i know i should offer the crying child a tissue but where the fuck are the tissues in this room what do i do''#and he just handed me a full-on towel instead like oh my god he was trying his best but also so clearly out of his depth#but of course i then had to remember how when i told that story to a different professor to be like ''this is how much scott cares about me#this guy called me fucking UNPROFESSIONAL for crying in front of the subject of my documentary?????????#like yeah maybe so but how DARE you call me unprofessional when a different professor tweeted my full name and gender without my consent#in an attempt to fucking cancel one of my friends for ''misgendering'' me for using pronouns i'm fine with him using!!!#i don't think i'm ever going to be able to forgive my college and i don't know how i'll be able to get through one more semester#that experience genuinely changed things about my psychology that i'm not proud of and i need to work through#so if i have to miss a goddamn kids in the hall event because i have class this november i am going to set something on fire
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the thing about working in a specific industry is you get a specific variety of 'he would not fucking say that' where it's 'he would not fucking know the correct term for that.'
#brought to you by me down the rabbit hole of determining whether the little medical facility in the small town in my wip is a CAH or not#I'm like 3 levels into determining the facility structure and how it's connected to the nearest actual hospital#and whether it has beds or just outpatient services#I'm over here thinking about what imaging or testing they might be able to offer or not#and whether they should be a cooperative of independent clinicians or a branch of a larger org or a CMS-specific facility#and then I remember that nobody in this novel knows or cares about any of that#they're all going to call it 'the hospital' even if it is NOT a hospital bc they don't know the difference#and in screaming inside bc the difference is HUGE on the backend like for starters who's billing for this????? who does the claims?????#but the characters do not know or care so I don't have to either#but it's a big difference!#anyway I think I've decided it is not a CAH
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there's something in the water that's specifically affecting green haired princesses who have purple eyes and also bpd (momochi and hiyori)
#I think I was able to show a new side of myself this time >< Please give it a listen” and doing spells on cheers to bless their dreams#even though both of her songs seem to be angsty and about her family#meanwhile hiyori the bitch was like#like with momochi there was her tweeting that the time for dreams is over (and yakouka possibly representing her current mental health)#and for hiyori it's her mental breakdown in accept my love#and also them brushing it off like it's nothing#like when the teaser dropped momochi tweeted something like#Life isn’t all about fun. There’s times where you feel depressed and like you want to cry.#When that happens it’s good to look at me. Because I’m the one who shines bright like the sun☆#it’s good to look at me. Because I’m the one who shines bright like the sun☆#Listen to my songs and follow the productions I appear in—#Just imitate me and smile! Since I always have a smile on my face!"#like girl the song was you spiraling over your loved ones becoming independant and no one needing your love even though she accepted that's#now her only role in life (to love and be loved)#like no one was concerned??? esp with the contrast with fantastic days#there's something poetic about her feeling she's no longer useful and her regression when in !! she suddenly became nicer with no explanati#and also her getting 0 song event 4*s and that eden is no longer relying on her (legit did nothing important in most of the eden events)#including ss finals with the dumbass oracles like the story was fucking boring and gatekeeper legit got more importance than tori and hiyor#anyway happy bday to my beautiful princess with a disorder#they should lock momochi and hiyori in a room (they both would somehow take each other out even though momochi is built like a paper straw#and hiyori is not strong at all the heaviest thing she wants to carry is her chopsticks)#in an alternate universe hanae couldve been voicing momochi instead of yuu and it would make this post even funnier
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Criticism of Simon: He was kinda creepy but that was just the crown
Criticism of Jake: He was a bad dad but y’know circumstances
Criticism of PB: [essay length explanation of how everything she ever did was terrible and worse than anything anyone else ever did]
Criticism of other characters: [idk I haven’t seen any]
#adventure time#princess bubblegum#bonnibel bubblegum#🥶 sorry#I genuinely think that Jake’s parenting was him BEING A DOG#and his kids BEING DOG RAINICORNS WHO ARE ABLE TO LIVE INDEPENDENTLY AND REACH ADULTHOOD VERY EARLY#but ppl should talk abt ‘she wants to go to the movies with you you just have to remind her’ or whatever and related comments#if they’re gonna criticize him#also. I’m sorry but it’s not JUST the crown. and even if it was#sorry I’m so tired and ill rn I’m not even that mad I’m just my filter is slipping again bc of the fever brain fog stuff#anyway!#jus talkin#also for the record I do LOVE Jake and Simon I just think it’s a little uneven 🙃 a lot#I have seen some criticism of other characters but only in fics as far as I can remember and it was either in passing or like idk just#stuff that I don’t even wanna think abt bc I only read it as a weird self punishment or smth
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not one of my kids emailing me a MONTH before school starts asking if there will be any exams the first week of school like honey please throw your school chromebook in the east river and go to the park and play a made up game with your friends i didnt give summer homework on purpose please be a child please be free
#i get that grindset culture is really pervasive and this kid knows shes gonna have to bust her ass to get ahead in life but damn#i should not be telling 12 year olds how to deal with burnout#constantly torn between telling the kids fuck all this shit do what makes you happy#and being like yeah youre right if you ever want to be able to move out and have financial independence in this city you gotta bust ass#i hate it here#parents if your kids are this stressed and obsessed with school please do not see this as a good thing
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The worst part about not going to college is there not being an easy time to move out
#I have like no friends and all of them still live at home or live at college#I can’t afford to live on my own#I don’t know anyone who needs a roommate#there’s nothing pushing me to leave I don’t haven’t he money to leave#bUT I CANTIVE HERE FOREVER#my mom be like ‘wrll if you’re gonna be in a bad mood (overstimulated) you should just leave the room’#but when I leave the room she’s like ‘wtf are you in a bad mood why don’t you wanna spend time with us’#kestrel calls#chitter chatter#text post#there’s so no natural progression from im your legal responsibility part of the family living in your house#and I am my own independent person who is living in your house#and obviously there’s differences from living your family than with a romance#but I wanna be able to just do my own thing yk#at least I can be in my room on my laptop with the door shut 🤪#I hope once we move there’s stronger boundaries
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Bro no joke, forgetting that not everyone hates capitalism and then having to try have a reasonable conversation with someone about buying things... *eye twitch*
#to explain we will have person A - person B and then me#so person B is asking me if its ok to buy stuff from ebay - because i am a person that tries to avoid buying from amazon etc#and im like yeah should be because its independent sellers mostly - to be fair though yall. i barely buy anything online because i hate#online shopping. i try to buy things in person instead#anyways insert person A whos like 👁👄👁 oH aRe YoU oNe Of ThOse PeOpLE ThAt DoESNt pUrCHasE frOm AmAzON#yall im sighing just thinking about this conversation omfg its so stupid#anyways queue me explaining that yeah. i try to avoid it if i can because i dont like my money going to some motherfucker who doesnt need#the money (person B pipes in that jeff bezos is on the way to becoming a trillionaire which is Not Good 🙃 . thank you B now i will go on)#A then goes on to explain all the benefits to amazon “what if you want something the next day” i ask if theres really anything you truly#need right away like that. we used to live in times where you would have to wait or find it in a shop. A says “oh but its so cool and#convenient“ and i say sure. because they have the money and grew their business of being more 'convenient' than other businesses#A says “oh but the customer service is so good. if i want a return theyll do it straight away with no questions and maybe even give me#credit too“ and im like yeah. because they can afford to do that. ”sometimes independent sellers are in there too“ ok so buy from them then#If You Must but i can guarantee you mostly dont. not to mentuon theyre probably only on there in the first place because amazon has made it#so its one of the most popular places to use instead of anywhere else#and it went on. i just stopped talking eventually because it eas one of those situations where the other person was not fucking listening to#the point i was trying to make. which is that if you really have to. ok do it whatever. i get that its a bit impossible to avoid sometimes#im not gonna sit here and pretend when ive not been able to get something anywhere else i havent got it from there. but the point is to#actually think about WHY youre buying stuff and WHO the money is going to. because websites like amazon especially have created such a trend#of overconsumption. that you just buy stuff and then buy prime because oh its so cheap and useful and comes right the next day! and you dont#consider why any of these things are true. whos getting fucked over in the process. that you are one of the people getting fucked over!!!#lord i could go on but i shant#point is. genuinely do what you want like deep down i do not care it does not affect me and i know its not so straightforward#but people who just BLATANTLY and actively SUPPORT rich people (forgot to mention A kept talking about how the whole site was smart and that#Jeff was a genius blah blah) can you sit and realise that this whole system and that FUCKING Imbecile of a man are!!¡! a problem!!#i wish i could articulate it better but im leaving it at that#good morning yall xD#le text post
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yall be clowning if you think your fave is a saint
#kinnporsche#they may support problematic ppl knowingly or unknowingly. they may have problematic believes that may get you gawking like how could you#they may be homophobic misogynistic anti feminists or just plain dumb af and doesn't realise where the world is at or#how controversial certain things are. they may be so pampered they don't know hardship. or they only know their industry and nothing else.#they may be very in the box that asking them about something out of the box may shock them or make them run away#they may be colorist racist assholes#we don't know who they are until their true colors come into light - that too may or may not#some just go unnoticed regarding their bullshits whilst some get jail time#we as audience need to allow our mind to be able to fathom all that; our mind should be independent all the time not dependant on these#people we only see on screen putting on a show for us to entertain because that is what they're getting paid for#it's their job. They're attached to money. Us on the other hand shouldn't get attached to them
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like I’m literally the only one of your fucking children who's on unambiguously good terms with you despite all of the shit you put me through as a child (that I’m sure you either conveniently ~don’t remember~ even though I know that you could write a detailed novel about every time I’ve ever fucked up or you Don’t Think Was Bad) and I was literally the only one of us who’s consistently shown you support and kindness during the past ten years and ever since you’ve moved in with us (because YOU couldn’t afford to pay rent) I’ve been nothing but understanding and I haven’t protested or complained Once about it and have ensured you multiple times that you aren’t being invasive and etc and I’m the Only One Of Us who kept in touch with you and told you good night while you were in the hospital and when my sister was being verbally abusive to you I gave you a fucking shoulder to cry on every single time and denounced her over and over again and not to mention I was literally The Only One Of Us who willingly volunteered to go on a special boat cruise with you on your 50th birthday (despite the fact that being away from home overnight makes me anxious and you Know it does) but yeah you go ahead and just keep on ignoring that and fixating on everything I’m Not doing right and telling me how I Don’t Actually Love You (and don’t say that you never said that shit because that’s all “You’re Not Giving Me The Love I Give You” could possibly mean.) And How Miserable I Make You (and don’t say you didn’t say that shit either!!) or w/e and keep on lumping me in with someone who literally threatened you and called you a broke bitch and a hoe!!!! whatever fucking makes you feel better!!!!!!
#wak#negative /#vent /#and no the problem isn't you telling me to get a job and etc because You're 100% Right And I Fully Agree With You!!!#For My Own Sake Yes I Do Need To Learn How To Pay All My Bills!!!#And I Do Need To Make Consistent Income!!!!#And I Do Need To Not Be Complete Dependent On My Family!!!#You're 100% Right!!!!!#No The problem is when you undermine literally Everything I've ever done for you!!#the problem is when you claim you were 'hurt' bc I drew you something for Mother's Day and didn't buy you Fancy Shoes or w/e tf you wanted#sorry that my art that I've spent years of hating myself over to perfect is so fucking worthless to you that you feel insulted!!!#the problem is when you group me in with someone who literally verbally attacked you bc I don't have a job atm!!!#the problem is when you take something really fucking minor and turn it into this huge attack on you#aside from not being as far in life as you Think I should be#I did Nothing to you!!!!#Literally Nothing!!!!!#but that's ok#bc when I Do get to the point of being able to live fully independently#and I cut your ass off permanently#YOU'RE going to be the one crying and sniveling over it#not me!!!!#so go ahead and keep pulling this bullshit!!!!!!#not about anyone online#obviously lmao#again. ignore this shit#delete later
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I mean yeah dude no kidding she’s better when she eats, because that’s how humans work
Dude is in DENIAL and I am just so tired of it. I’m looking forward to talking to grandpa when he calls me so that I can get an update, because… sigh. I just want broad strokes. I mean yes a shitty update is an update but is it really better than no update? Idk.
Our energetic friend happened to call last night and since her mom also died of cancer and also had a brain tumor, it was especially meaningful to have her tell me for the umpteenth time that whatever decision I made re: seeing her is the right one. If someone who adored and cared for her mom in her final days says that… I mean, I KNOW it’s true, but coming from her I believe it.
Idk man. I want my mom to be at peace. I want her to die. She wouldn’t want to be like this.
#I bet she’s going to die while I’m in Nashville#I should text grandpa and see if she’s drinking anything because I think that’ll be a big clue#idk why death is scary#especially in situations like this#like. maybe I have a skewed view on it because I’ve been suicidal multiple times#but regardless of what your brand of spirituality believes happens it has to be better than this#death is an ending. it’s sad for the still-alive people! that’s reasonable!#but for a person who’s not going to get better and has no hope of going back to a fraction of their past self?#for someone who doesn’t respond and sleeps a lot and is already shutting down?#nah. death means you don’t have to struggle anymore#you don’t have to be changed by your partner and be embarrassed that your kids know you’re incontinent#you don’t have people talking down to you#you don’t have everything you talk about questioned or get asked questions like boy do you remember living up in Washington#you don’t have to have uncomfortable topics hidden from you or be talked about while you’re still in the room#you don’t have to have invasive questions asked about you#death—honestly—sounds like a relief after all this#and knowing how FIERCELY and OBNOXIOUSLY independent she was#and how she HATED asking for help#that alone… she would fucking hate this. she DID hate this when she was still able to do things on her own#but now? please just let her die.#like idk man this isn’t a family who believes that any of US are going to hell#everyone who’s religious believes everyone is going to heaven#and those of us who aren’t just want her to be able to have this end#like sorry mom I don’t know if you can be buried in the cemetery with your mom and the baby who died#but if you can’t be then I’ll have you cremated and figure out how to get your ashes spread up there#it’s the next best thing.#I hope you’re not hanging on just for me mom.
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Obviously, keep the holidays. Add more. Celebrate them however you want. :'D
You gotta create replacement activities man. We can't just phase out all the church attendance and all the usamerican social holidays cold turkey in the middle of a loneliness epidemic bro like yeah fuck church fuck thanksgiving and FUCK the 4th of July but like what's the long-term plan. People need holidays and repetitive social rituals or they go crazy. Like are we inventing new ones or ....?
#why would you get rid of ANY holiday#keep them#keep them all#keep all the holidays#add new ones#more days off and more fun things to celebrate#I'm an equal opportunity holiday enjoyer#are people really talking about 'getting rid of holidays' like there's a point to it? what kind of obnoxious thought is that#you've never had to get religious or attend church about any holiday ever#you've always been able to make it what you want#too funny#humor#ofc thanksgiving and turkey are staying#ofc 4th of july and fireworks are staying#if you somehow hate taking time to be thankful for things or think countries should never celebrate independence? then whatever#quite literally you do you#use the time off as time off#and chill with friends/family how you like#social media does get odd ideas doesn't it? lol
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that cursed feeling of looking at a body of research and going “this is really obvious but I cannot find any offshoots looking at it”. like did I just find a huge gap in research or is the literature about it just weirdly obscure? like you cannot tell me that nobody has looked at how goal disengagement interacts with help-seeking behavior. that is way too simple a question for nobody to have asked. It’s literally part of the assimilative mode of coping. and you are telling me nobody has looked at it??? that cannot be it
#like Brandtstadter & Greve do describe these processes as adjustments in the self-image#and I cannot find literature going “yeah we should look at how people have to let go of their self-image of being able to do something#independently to allow them to seek help” and I stg there probs is literature about this#just not using a framework of developmental regulation#because by god psychologists love to reinvent the same shit over and over again just with slightly different vocabulary in a different field#of psychology#probably social psychology those bastards#why can’t you work integratively people
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