et focis (listen/download)
a chbolc mix - part two - arranged by ducksbellorum
welcome to the party - diplo
We on fire
Ride up to the party,
Ride up to the party
Ayy, live it up
this year - the mountain goats
There will be feasting and dancing
in Jerusalem next year
I am going to make it
through this year if it kills me
is he worthy - chris tomlin
Is He worthy? Is He worthy
Of all blessing and honor and glory?
Is He worthy of this?
He is
not a pretty girl - ani difranco
And I have earned my disillusionment
I have been working all of my life
And I am a patriot
I have been fighting the good fight
happy - pharrell williams
Well, I should probably warn ya,
I'll be just fine
No offense to you, don’t
waste your time, here's why
wilson (expensive mistakes) - fall out boy
And when I say I'm sorry I'm late
I wasn't showing up at all
I really mean I didn't plan
on showing up at all
you say - lauren daigle
The only thing that matters now
is everything You think of me
In You, I find my worth,
in You, I find my identity
hollaback girl - gwen stefani
So I'm ready to attack,
gonna lead the pack
Gonna get a touchdown,
gonna take you out
big houses - squalloscope
We follow our own steps,
while our shadows keep watching us
The wrong step would
be not to start this exodus
blessings - big sean
I'm here for a good time,
not a long time, you know
I haven't had a good time
in a long time, you know
the sound of silence - simon and garfunkel
And the sign said, "The
words of the prophets are written
on the subway walls and tenement halls
And whispered in the sound of silence"
a thousand miles - vanessa carlton
It's always times like these
when I think of you
And I wonder if you
ever think of me
chant ii - hadestown
Oh, he said he’d shelter us
He said he’d harbor me
He said we’d soldier on
And then the war would bring us peace
youth of the nation - p.o.d.
There's gotta be more to life than this
There's gotta be more to
everything I thought exists
We are, we are, the youth of the nation
eastbound and down - jerry reed
We gonna do what they
say can't be done
We've got a long way to go
and a short time to get there
toes - zac brown band
I got my toes in the water,
ass in the sand
Not a worry in the world,
a cold beer in my hand
fix you - coldplay
And I will try to fix you
Tears stream down your face
When you lose somethin'
you cannot replace
stay alive (reprise) - hamilton
I know, I know. Shh
I know, I know
Shh. I know you did
Ev’rything just right
there’s a fine fine line - avenue q
You gotta go after the things you want
while you're still in your prime
There's a fine, fine line between love
And a waste of time
the star spangled banner
Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just,
And this be our motto—"In God is our Trust;"
And the star-spangled Banner in triumph shall wave,
O'er the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave.
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Learning that fans hated Applejack and called her "boring" is crazyyy to me because I genuinely, unironically believe AJ's the most complex character in the main six.
Backstory-wise, she was born into a family of famers/blue collar workers who helped found the town she lives in. She grew up a habitual liar until she had the bad habit traumatized outta her. She lost both her parents and was orphaned at a young age, having to step up as her baby sister's mother figure. She's the only person in the main gang who's experienced this level of loss and grief (A Royal Problem reveals that AJ dreams about memories of being held by her parents as a baby). She moved to Manhattan to live with her wealthy family members, only to realize she'll never fit in or be accepted, even amongst her own family. The earlier seasons imply she and her family had money problems too (In The Ticket Master, AJ wants to go to the gala to earn money to buy new farm equipment and afford hip surgery for her grandma).
Personality-wise, she's a total people-pleaser/steamroller (with an occasional savior complex) who places her self worth on her independence and usefulness for other people, causing her to become a complete workaholic. In Applebuck Season, AJ stops taking care of herself because of her obsessive responsibilities for others and becomes completely dysfunctional. In Apple Family Reunion, AJ has a tearful breakdown because in she thinks she dishonored her family and tarnished her reputation as a potential leader –– an expectation and anxiety that's directly tied to her deceased parents, as shown in the episode's ending scene. In The Last Roundup, AJ abandons her family and friends out of shame because believes she failed them by not earning 1st place in a rodeo competition. She completely spirals emotionally when she isn't able to fulfill her duties toward others. Her need to be the best manifests in intense pride and competitiveness when others challenge her. And when her pride's broken, she cowers and physically hides herself.
Moreover, it's strongly implied that AJ has a deep-seated anger. The comics explore her ranting outbursts more. EQG also obviously has AJ yelling at and insulting Rarity in a jealous fit just to hurt her feelings (with a line that I could write a whole dissection on). And I'm certain I read in a post somewhere that in a Gameloft event, AJ's negative traits are listed as anger.
Subtextually, a lot of these flaws and anxieties can be (retroactively) linked to her parents' death, forcing her to grow up too quickly to become the adult/caregiver of the family (especially after her big brother becomes semiverbal). Notice how throughout the series, she's constantly acting as the "mom friend" of the group (despite everything, she manages to be the most emotionally mature of the bunch). Notice how AJ'll switch to a quieter, calmer tone when her friends are panicking and use soothing prompts and questions to talk them through their emotions/problems; something she'd definitely pick up while raising a child. Same with her stoicism and reluctance at crying or releasing emotions (something Pinkie explicitly points out). She also had a childhood relationship with Rara (which, if you were to give a queer reading, could easy be interpreted as her first 'aha' crush), who eventually left her life. (Interestingly enough, AJ also has an angry outburst with Rara for the same exact reasons as with EQG Rarity; jealous, upset that someone else is using and changing her). It's not hard to imagine an AJ with separation anxiety stemming from her mother and childhood friend/crush leaving. I'm also not above reading into AJ's relationship with her little sister (Y'all ever think about how AB never got to know her parents, even though she shares her father's colors and her mother's curly hair?).
AJ's stubbornness is a symptom of growing up too quickly as well. Who else to play with your baby sister when your brother goes nonverbal (not to discount Big Mac's role in raising AB)? Who else to wake up in the middle of the night to care for your crying baby sister when your grandma needs her rest? When you need to be 100% all the time for your family, you tend to become hard-stuck with a sense of moral superiority. You know what's best because you have to be your best because if you're aren't your best, then everything'll inevitably fall apart and it'll be your fault. And if you don't know what's best –– if you've been wrong the whole time –– that means you haven't been your best, which means you've failed the people who rely on you, which means you can't fulfill your role in the family/society, which makes you worthless . We've seen time and time again how this compulsive need to be right for the sake of others becomes self-destructive (Apple Family Reunion, Sound of Silence, all competitions against RD). We've seen in The Last Roundup how, when no longer at her best, AJ would rather remove herself from her community than confront them because she no longer feels of use to them.
But I guess it is kinda weird that AJ has "masculine" traits and isn't interested in men at all. It's totally justified that an aggressively straight, misogynistic male fandom would characterize her as a "boring background character." /s
At the time of writing this, it's 4:46AM.
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Not a steddie!dads post believe it or not, but I was thinking about how S1-Steve conks the fuck out after sleeping w/Nancy (which was.......an interesting choice imo) but it got me thinking about what would happen if the same thing happened with Eddie.
Like, all the Upside Down shit is done and they're all healed up and, after pining for each other for ages, Steve and Eddie finally hook up.
It definitely wasn't a gooey, sappy, romantic love confession type of situation, more like the natural culmination of several agonizing months of sexual tension and trying to feel out what the other might be thinking and a pretty aggressive campaign of flirting on Eddie's part that he's certain Steve was matching him on toe-to-toe for at least most of and being badgered by their friends to pull their respective heads out of their respective asses — a glorified hook-up, really.
Yeah, there might have been an undercurrent of more in the way Steve had threaded their fingers together and the way he'd looked at him with those gorgeous hazel eyes of his and the way he'd kissed him like it fucking meant something, but there hadn't been a lot of words.
Eddie's a words kind of guy, believe it or not, and he'd really like to be looped into whatever the hell is going on inside Steve's perplexing brain, thanks, but no.
Instead, afterwards Steve had pulled Eddie into his arms, twined them tight around his waist and tangled their legs together and tucked his face into the curve of Eddie's shoulder, and that was...new, but in a matter of minutes he'd started softly snoring, and that — dozing off after a hook-up so the other can make a discreet exit — is a move Eddie knows intimately, not that knowing it makes it sting any less, because Eddie had thought Steve might be more, that this thing roiling beneath the surface of their friendship could be more than just a one-time thing.
It's actually kind of fucking horseshit, actually, that Steve is expecting Eddie to just leave like this had been nothing more than a chance to get laid, because Eddie knows it's more than that — not because he has good self-esteem or whatever, but because it's so obviously more than that.
The whole thing actually kind of bothers Eddie, and he's always been a petulant shit about things that bother him and he'd never cared too much about doing what he's "supposed to", or whatever, so...fuck it. He's tired and this rich-people mattress is way more comfortable than anything Eddie had slept on before, and Steve needs to grow a pair and face the music of this shit in the morning.
So instead of sliding out of Steve's grip like everyone who came before him, Eddie settles in and forces himself to fall asleep too.
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Pro Aris (listen/download)
a CHBOLC mix - part one - arranged by ducksbellorum
l.i.f.e.g.o.e.s.o.n. - noah and the whale
What you don't have now
will come back again
You've got heart and
you go in your own way
walk it talk it - migos
Heard you signed your life
for that brand new chain
Think it came with stripes but
you ain't straight with the gang
nothing suits me like a suit - neil patrick harris
To score a 10 would be just fine
But I'd rather be dressed to the nines!
It's a truth you can't refute
Nothing suits me like a suit
both - gucci mane ft. drake
I don't usually do this
'less I'm drunk or I'm high
But I'm both right now
and I need ya in my life
i’m a believer - smash mouth
Then I saw her face,
now I'm a believer
Not a trace of doubt in my mind
I'm in love
feel it still - portugal the man
Am I coming out of left field?
Ooh, I'm a rebel just for kicks now
I been feeling it since 1966 now
Might be over now, but I feel it still
walking on sunshine - katrina and the waves
I feel alive, I feel the love,
I feel the love that's really real
I'm on sunshine, baby,
Oh, yeah, I'm on sunshine
big god - florence and the machine
You need a big god
Big enough to hold your love
You need a big god
Big enough to fill you up
mama do the hump - rizzle kicks
Yo, it's been a long week
How I've got this much
energy is beyond me
I just want all of these girls
grenade - bruno mars
I'd catch a grenade for ya
Throw my hand on a blade for ya
I'd jump in front of a train for ya
You know I'd do anything for ya
thunder/young dumb and broke medley - imagine dragons and khalid
You always say I'm wrong,
I'm pretty sure I'm right
They say you're basic,
they say you're easy
tomorrow - annie
The sun will come out
Tomorrow
So ya gotta hang on
'Til tomorrow
party like a rockstar - shop boyz
Party like a rockstar,
totally dude
I'm on a money makin' mission
but I party like a rockstar
the bus is late - satellite high
Waiting for the bus
Where is the bus?
The bus is late
Waiting for the bus in the rain
proud to be an american - lee greenwood
I'm proud to be an American where at least I know I'm free
And I won't forget the men who died, who gave that right to me
And I'd gladly stand up next to you and defend her still today
'Cause there ain't no doubt I love this land! God bless the U.S.A.
lord i need you - matt maher
Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You
party up - dmx
Y'all gon' make me act a fool
Up in here, up in here
Y'all gon' make me lose my cool
Up in here, up in here
holy is the lord - chris tomlin
It's rising up all around
It's the anthem of the Lord's renown
And together we sing
Everyone sing
stir fry - migos
Dance with my dogs
in the nighttime
In the kitchen,
wrist twistin' like it's stir fry
livin on a prayer - bon jovi
We've gotta hold on
to what we've got
It doesn't make a difference
if we make it or not
don’t stop believing - journey
Livin' just to find emotion
Hidin' somewhere in the night
Don't stop believin'
Hold on to that feelin'
(i’ve had) the time of my life - dirty dancing
I've had the time of my life
No, I never felt this way before
Yes, I swear it's the truth
And I owe it all to you
these streets - bastille
We'll walk upon these streets
and think of little else
So I won't show my
face here anymore
i’m in the lord’s army - cedarmont kids
I may never fly o'er the enemy,
But I'm in the Lord's army!
Yes Sir!
I'm in the Lord's army!
soldiers of god - bing crosby
Soldiers of God, we serve Him faithfully,
And march in His name
Through thunder and flame
Wherever the call may be.
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