#you know that don't you?
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i like the idea of simon finding himself a virgin (whom he ravishes as soon as you're willing) not because of whatever tf it's supposed to mean: pure and all that rot (plus it's hypocritical, that man's bathed in the blood of others, licked his fingers clean of it. last thing he is is clean.)
but because that means he's all they'll ever know. tells you that those rom-com's aren't real. romance like that is only in hollywood. "it's fiction, pet. what you 'n i have is special."
"true," he affirms.
has you think that him over protecting you like a dragon does gold is normal. threatens others with bodily harm because they looked at you for longer than a second or two. has you sit on his cock when his friends come over for a drink, hand trembling as it reaches for your glass of water.
let's them look at your pretty cunt, slick and stretched to its limit. let's them watch as it constricts when his fingers spread into a v, feeling you be spread open and feeling himself stuff you until his tip hits something firm. resistant.
let's his captain shotgun smoke into your mouth and rumbles out a laugh when you start to cough and sputter, simon hissing behind you.
let's kyle give you some of his alcohol, large hand cupping the underside of your jaw, fingers dimpling your cheeks as he squeezes until your mouth opens.
another cough, an even louder hiss.
"you're alrigh', doin' well," drips from simon's lips when soap gets closer than the others, chair screeching against your floor as he does. gets so close his sweetened breath fans over your dripping, very busy cunt.
at least he lets you come on his cock instead of his fingers like last time.
typical.
boyfriend.
behavior.
#simon riley x reader#he's a dog your honor#but he does what's best for you#you know that don't you?#141 x reader#if you squint
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Ignoring the real possibility he intentionally let himself be caught from the little we know so far Luigi Mangione's case is a fascinating combination of astonishing brilliance and confusing stupidity. This young man plans and executes his assassination and escape with such a meticulous care and calmness that it's suspected that he's a professional hitman. He comes up with Riddler-sque moves like writing his manifesto poetically on the bullets and leaving his backpack behind full of Monopoly money. He carefully wears a mask to avoid being identified but removes it because a woman who was checking him into the hostel was flirting with him and wanted to see his smile. He still manages to escape the most surveilled city in the country in the midst of ongoing national manhunt only to get caught in the middle of bumfuck nowhere Pennsylvania while eating at the McDonalds. Because for some reason he had the same clothes and mask as in New York and was carrying the same gun and suppressor. And when the cops detained him he showed them the same fake id he used in New York. And oh yeah he's a frat bro gym rat who has a masters degree in computer science from Penn but reads stupid self-help books about being on the grind and is 'anti-woke' while being bisexual suffering from anxiety and wanting to end oppressive capitalism. Not even god himself could invent a person like this
#EDIT: this post got way bigger than i predicted so just clarifying no i don't automatically assume he's guilty#he's a suspect at this point and no of course i don't trust the police#also so many people in the notes saying they know guys like this okay i believe you clearly god could make a person like this#luigi mangione#.txt
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arcane ships be like
i love a show that teaches equality (😭😭😭)
#guys i don't actually ship jayvik but it was necessary for the reference#sorry for the quality btw i threw this together#timebomb#jayvik#caitvi#arcane#arcane spoilers#arcane season 2#EDIT: multiple people have pointed out that the labels i've used aren't the characters' real sexualities. and they're right#there's actually NO labels in runeterra so i shoulda said m/f m/m and f/f relationships#but you guys already gave this 13k notes so whatever bro#just know!!! they are more than whatever nathaniacolver post labels them as! :)#EDIT AGAIN AFTER THE FINALE: I DO INDEED NOW SHIP JAYVIK. DAFUQ#DOOM IS DOOM#edit number 3 or something idk man people keep asking stuff:#i made this after act 1 and before acts 2 & 3 so this is an ACT 1 MEME#and yes timebomb are whatever the frick you want them to be. *sighs*. i should've said f/m relationship so bad
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in the hour or so it took me to draw this op turned reblogs off
EDIT: reblogs are STAYING OFF. op was right and correct and i have never regretted making a post as much as this one. if you want to reblog my art you can reblog something else from my blog. or commission me, lord knows i deserve financial compensation for the nightmare this post has put me through
#art#i had to block multiple people because of this post and i easily could have blocked more#do you guys have any idea how exhausting it is to hear 400 people make the exact same unfunny joke each thinking they're being original#or worry that another person might get harassed over a post i made because of the way people are talking about them#or be harassed/insulted YOURSELF because some people don't know how to fucking behave#you guys don't get reblogs back. you should be grateful i'm leaving the post up at all.
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I'm always entertained by people doing those "canon VS fanon" memes where both are misunderstanding characters to such a violent degree 'cause like
#sp-rambles#“Canon is when they do not cry nor have emotions whatsoever and fanon is when they sob 24/7”#Like idk buddy I think it Depends#Edit: Since this is getting moderately popular#Yes this was made about Sans but also for TF2#You don't know the hell that is the TF2 fandom and how they treat these characters lol#Because how the hell do you misinterpret such simplistic characters who have like 2 or 3 personality traits each
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one of the most infuriating things about becoming an adult is when you realize that it actually is 10x easier to solve problems by making a phone call vs literally any other communication method
#I was forced to get over my hatred of making phone calls bc of this#one 15 minute phone call is the equivalent of 5 back and forth emails#also if you don't know exactly what you need help with you can just ask and you can get real help#instead of just desperately clawing at faqs on websites#it's infuriating that it works so well#ramblings
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I am never going to be able to leave Reddit.
#reddit#aita#I don't even know how to begin tagging this#gay#how would that even work though#could you imagine what a good rollercoaster could DO to you
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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caught them doing the SIN, cos, tan (bad trigonometry joke, I'm sorry, you have permission to euthanize me)
bonus:
#I don’t know WHY on earth I drew this but sir mix-a-lot was playing so maybe that explains it#the book of bill#gravity falls#billford#Art Of The Sun Chip#gravity falls fanart#stanford pines#bill cipher#fiddleford mcgucket#fiddauthor#artists on tumblr#ford pines#art#drawing#fanart#my art#doodle#illustration#procreate#comic#please don't repost my artwork onto other sites thank you!
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The world exists in such a baffling state of simultaneous sex-aversion and sex-hegemony. Every social platform on the internet is trying to banish sex workers to the shadow realm but I can't post a tweet without at least two bots replying P U S S Y I N B I O. People are self-censoring sex to seggs and $3× but every other ad you see is still filled with half-naked women. Rightwingers want queer people arrested for so much as existing in the same postal code as a child and are also drumming up a moral panic about how teenage boys aren't getting laid enough. I feel like I'm losing my mind.
#it's bad if you want i have sex it's also bad if you DON'T want to have sex#god forbid if you're a woman in a heterosexual marriage and aren't in the mood#that's 'withholding sex' and you're clearly abusive scum who should be divorced and left without any of your shared assets.#but if you DO have sex now you're a degenerate freak plotting for the downfall of western society#i don't know what to say i'm just so tired#politics#culture#queerphobia#lgbtqia#misogyny#<it's not the exclusive source but let's be honest sooo much of this is integral to the patriarchy#patriarchy needs access to an underclass they can treat like sex objects but they also don't want them to have any human rights#so sexuality is both obligatory and stigmatized#purity culture#i'm really struggling with tagging this because most of the appropiate tags would- in a beautiful twist of irony- get me booted off tumblr
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Italian microaggressions
#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#мой пост#мой рисунок#marcille donato#marcille#not canon compliant because they don't actually know anything about where she's from#can you tell i just finished the manga. it was only a matter of time before i started making comics#not ml#dunmeshi
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watching bridgerton and obviously there were a lot of things wrong with the way socializing has worked in the past, but honestly the idea of a "calling hour" is so appealing. office hours for friendship. you can show up unannounced at my home between 1 and 3pm. you must leave by 3pm. I may give you a pastry. lets bring that back
#bridgerton#lauren says things#i know the calling hour is for romantic prospects#(at least in bridgerton)#but there IS something to be said for having social rules! I like it to an extent!#no I don't have a panic disorder rooted in social anxiety why are you asking me that#and tbf one CAN just do this!#but working out social contracts with friends is hard and scary lol
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i feel like people are skimming over the uk riots in a way that makes me want to tear my hair out. muslims in the uk are in active danger. immigrants in the uk are in active danger. refugees in the uk are in active danger. people of colour in the uk are in active danger. asian communities in the uk are in active danger. black communities in the uk are in active danger.
there are massive far right riots throughout the country right now and people like fucking elon musk and nigel farage are inciting it and still have a platform to speak. people have used three young girls deaths, people's genuine grief in southport, to try and gain traction for their own racist bullshit and it's working.
a lot of refugee charities have been forced to close leaving many people without support, homes, funding, food, etc. if you aren't able to donate please consider sending a message via the conversation over borders campaign! it will send a hopeful, welcoming letter to a refugee in the uk. there is also a guide to staying safe here.
please do your own research and donate to refugee charities, anti-islamophobia charities, mosques who are trying to rebuild after being destroyed, counter protesters, here are some i've heard positive things about but the list is extensive; southport strong together (support for the southport victims and their families), southport mosque rebuilding, riot repair fund, middlesbrough vulnerable residents, nasir mosque rebuilding, hull help for refugees, bristol welcomes migrants,
#i know there's so much going on but if you can take a second to support these groups !!#i just feel kinda sick#i wanted to add with so many people seeing this that i'm white im british and im extremely privileged to not be in active danger right now#i don't want to take away from people speaking out about this who are in a place of danger#this was really only meant to be for my followers#but i'm glad more people get to see what's happening and donate !!!
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#i don't believe that people for serious reasons sort their books any way but by author#and then obviously by release date/series within that#i am being told that i am being JUDGY#also if you sort your books any other way HOW DO YOU FIND THEM#i really need to know#polls#can't believe i forgot to include genre in here
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The math just adds up!
#dungeon meshi#falin touden#marcille donato#farcille#I always loved how chapter 27 ends with them both so bloody and 28 starts with them in the bath.#not just because of how iconic the bathtub moment is but because you know they had to scrap off so much gore first.#I think everyone in the party took a very long and methodical bath but Falin was basically *all* blood*.#Being covered in blood is one of those 'just girly things' that women deserve to stop being shamed about.#I just don't think Chilchuck is progressive enough. He probably made them take a bath first B*/#Okay jestering aside I want to just highlight -#The magnitude of Marcille's joy at seeing her dearest friend again! Of holding her and sharing her presence in the same room!#Something about this reunion feels like a beautiful dream you are afraid of waking up from...
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