#you know one time when i was a kid i jumped too high off of a ladder on the playground and hit my feet too hard
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Another thing that gets me about Pharma's situation is a personal headcanon related to the way real life militaries work (I used to be really into the US military, don't throw tomatoes at me I stopped wanting to join it a long time ago) is that it's considered pretty much standard protocol to retrieve the bodies of fallen soldiers unless it's absolutely impossible. A literal "nobody is left behind" attitude.
Now granted, the LL isn't really acting in a military capacity because the war is over.
But I like to imagine that part of why Pharma felt so betrayed was because standard Autobot procedure would've been for any known missing/lost soldiers to be checked for, to try and find their body to confirm their death if nothing else. But the Autobots just left Messatine and left Pharma alone without even bothering to check if he lived or died. So to Pharma, it feels as if after all his years of serving the Autobots dutifully, they couldn't even do the bare minimum duty of looking for his body to confirm his death or god forbid give him proper funeral services.
Incidentally, this headcanon will be the premise for a "Pharma gets brought onto the Lost Light as a prisoner instead of getting left on Messatine" AU fic. With the justification being that Magnus hears about the Delphi situation and is like, wait you guys just left but the Autobot Code says we have to look for the body blah blah and I guess he acts annoying enough about it that someone goes looking for Pharma's body and finds him still alive.
INCIDENTALLY-incidentally, I think the most likely canon answer for "whether Pharma fell or flew to his death" is that Pharma fell. We see on screen that the Red Rust's symptoms activate within minutes of being triggered and that it renders victims practically nonfunctional after only a short amount of time (limbs and the entire body slowly disintegrating). So if Pharma had transformed, he would've activated the rust and died very quickly, especially since he wouldn't be able to go back to Delphi and access actual medical equipment.......and had his hands cut off so he was physically incapable of tending to himself anyways.
Pharma has thrusters on his heels that probably wouldn't require transformation to activate, so my headcanon is that Pharma was able to cushion his fall enough to not die, but probably still broke his legs and was in too much pain/practically immobile and couldn't crawl to find any help. This would also align with Pharma saying that Tyrest found him "sleeping in the snow" and Tyrest calling Pharma "a disease waiting to happen", implying that Pharma was infected with the Red Rust but hadn't actually triggered its effects yet.
#squiggposting#pharma apologism#you know one time when i was a kid i jumped too high off of a ladder on the playground and hit my feet too hard#the amount of pain i felt from the impact going up my legs and into my hips was literally the most painful thing i'd felt until that point#i was like gasping and heaving and just crawled under an overhang and curled up and waited for the pain to pass#later on i learned some more facts about how people die from falling to their death#did you know that if someone lands on their feet from falling too high#their thigh bones can be thrust up into their torso and they die of internal bleeding from their bones impaling their organs#anyways. in my mind that's what happened to pharma minus him bleeding to death. lol#though since pharma describes these events so euphemistically as him 'sleeping in the snow'#one must wonder if he literally did die and tyrest somehow used the magic of luna 1 to bring him back#also idk if the nobody left behind is just a usa thing. it's probably not#i just know that it's a point of pride for the us mil as like a comaraderie thing and a bragging point
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"mama!"
your seven year old daughter climbed onto your bed, bouncing on the mattress before settling into your warm embrace under the blankets. running a hand through her pink hair, you answered softly, "yes, sweetheart?"
it was almost like your genes didn't put up a fight at all. your child, chikara, was the spitting image of her father, your husband, ryomen sukuna. same hair, same face shape, same facial features, the only thing that seemed to be your contribution was her personality, and even then, sometimes you'll see your husband's characteristic scowl on her little face
"how did you and daddy meet?" "well, it wasâ"
"what's goin' on in here? conspiring against me?" sukuna's voice filled the room as he leaned against the door frame, a cheeky smirk on his face. you saw your daughter's face brighten up as she jumped down to run to her father, "daddy! daddy! mommy's gonna tell the story of when you first met!" sukuna immediately looked at you, his index finger barely being fully wrapped by his daughter's hand
"she asked me to. guess watching all those romantic dramas with her rubbed off on her." you giggled, earning a scowl from him. "shut it woman. you know i hate them." "yeah..., that's definitely why we watch 90 day fiance every sunday together." "you got a problem withâ stop tryna move me brat!"
"but daddyyyyy," she whined, still pushing against sukuna's body, "i don't wanna miss mommy's story!" "we're literally seven feet away from her."
your daughter pouted and stopped trying to get her dad to move. letting go of his finger, and leaving him at the doorway, chikara plopped herself down at your side with wide, eager eyes, "go on, mommy, tell me! i wanna know everything."
you smiled, looking at sukuna, who rolled his eyes but gave a small nod. "alright, sweetheart. it all started one day in the park when i was watching over megumi, and your dad was taking care of his younger brother, yuujiâŚ"
"yuuji?" chikara interrupted, her face lighting up. "uncle yuuji was there too?"
"yep, yuuji was just a little kid back then," you said with a soft laugh. "he was running around, being his usual energetic self, when he tripped and scraped his knee. your dad, being the great caretaker he isâ"
"âi was plenty good at it," sukuna muttered
you shot him a look and continued, "âdidn't seem too worried. he told yuuji to stop crying."
"i did not say it like that," sukuna cut in, pushing off the doorframe and coming closer to the bed. "i told him to toughen up. gotta learn how to handle a few scrapes."
your daughter giggled, clearly entertained by the back-and-forth. "but mommy's a nurse, so she went over to help, right?"
"exactly. i couldn't just sit there watching, so i went over, knelt down, and started cleaning yuuji's knee. and i told your fatherâ" you paused, giving sukuna a mischievous smile, "âthat he should care more about his son instead of telling him to stop crying."
your daughter gasped dramatically, eyes wide with anticipation. sukuna groaned, running a hand over his face. "i knew you'd bring that up."
"and what did daddy say?" she asked, leaning in as if she could hardly wait
"he looked at me and said, 'that's not my son, that's my brother,'" you mimicked sukunaâs low, irritated tone. "i was so embarrassed!" sukuna chuckled at the memory, shaking his head. "you should've seen your momâs face. all high and mighty, like she was about to call child protection services on me or something."
you couldn't help but laugh, too. "anyway, i patched yuuji up, and to make up for the misunderstanding, your dad suggested we set up a playdate for yuuji and megumi."
"a playdate?"
"yup," you nodded. "though i think your dad might've had other reasons for giving me his number." sukuna scoffed, folding his arms. "that didnât happen."
you raised an eyebrow at him. "oh? so your eyes didnât sparkle when i smiled and told you goodbye?" sukuna groaned again, this time louder. "my eyes did not do that."
chikara giggled harder, clearly enjoying the banter. "i think daddy liked you right away!" you smiled softly. "maybe he did. i mean, why else would he take me to a skate park for our first date?" sukuna rolled his eyes. "you said you wanted to learn how to skate. i was just being nice."
"uh-huh. sure," you teased. "and he was so good at it, zooming around, showing off. i'll admit..., he did look kinda cool! i, on the other hand, spent most of the time falling."
"which is why i had to keep catching you," sukuna added, sliding into the empty space next to you on the bed. "mommy fell? did daddy save you?" chikara asked, her face lighting up at the idea
sukuna ruffled her pink hair. "more like i had to stop her from breaking every bone in her body." you rolled your eyes at him. "i wasn't that bad."
"yes, you were," sukuna said, smirking. "you almost took me down with you half the time." smiling at the memory, you leaned in to kiss your daughter's forehead. "but it was fun. and after that, we went out for ice cream, and your dad actually smiled for real that time."
"daddy smiled? really?"
sukuna shot you a half-hearted glare. "i smile."
"not back then you didn't," you teased, poking his arm. chikara turned to her dad, beaming. "i wanna learn to skate, too, just like you and mommy!" sukuna chuckled, wrapping an arm around her
"maybe one day, brat. but youâre probably gonna fall as much as your mom did."
"hey!"
gulp... sorry if sukuna is ooc, im tired and im on my period but i really liked this request so...
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#â â rieamena writes!#â â rieamena answers!#rieamena#riea#jujitsu kaisen#jjk x reader#jjk#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen imagines#sukuna#ryomen sukuna#jjk sukuna#jjk ryomen#sukuna x reader#sukuna fluff#ryomen x reader#ryomen fluff#sukuna ryomen#sukuna x you
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RAFE CAMERON - the language of roses
x FEM!reader - MASTERLIST
SUMMARY: your entire life rafe had been giving you roses in different colours, but you never knew what he really wanted to say
WORD COUNT: 3956
GENRE: fluff
CONTENT WARNING: english is NOT my first language, soft!rafe cameron, oblivious!reader
rafe cameron was the kind of kid who never sat still. always running, climbing, jumping off something too high just to prove he could. but there was one thing he always slowed down for: you.
you didnât know why, back then. it wasnât like youâd done anything special. you were just the girl who lived two houses down, the one who tagged along on all his adventures because you were good at keeping up. youâd follow him through the woods behind the cameron house, across the sandy dunes near the water, and even onto the roof of the clubhouse his dad had built in their backyard.
but every so often, heâd stop, like heâd remembered something important, and heâd disappear for a minute or two.
the first time it happened, you were seven. youâd been playing hide-and-seek in the cameron yard, and youâd been crouched behind the garden shed for what felt like forever, waiting for him to find you. when he finally did, he was grinning, his hair messy and sticking to his forehead. in his hand was a single yellow rose.
âwhatâs that for?â youâd asked, wrinkling your nose.
âitâs for you,â he said, holding it out like it was no big deal.
âwhy?â
heâd shrugged. âjust âcause. youâre my best friend.â
that became his thing.
when you scraped your knee climbing a tree, rafe handed you a yellow rose from his momâs garden and said, âitâll make you feel better.â
when you had to spend a week at your grandparentsâ house and came back sulking about missing the beach, there he was with another yellow rose.
âwhat does it mean?â youâd asked one day, sitting cross-legged on his bed as he sorted through his pokĂŠmon cards.
âwhat?â he asked, not looking up.
âthe roses. why do you always give me yellow ones?â
he paused, his hands stilling. âitâs just⌠you know. the prettiest one i could find.â
âoh.â
heâd gone back to his cards, but youâd stared at the flower on the bedside table, something about it making your chest feel funny.
by the time you were ten, the roses felt like part of your routine. if you had a bad day at school, rafe would show up with one tucked behind his ear, waiting for you at your front door.
âhere,â heâd say, handing it over with a grin. âitâs magic. makes everything better.â
âthatâs not how magic works,â youâd reply, but you always accepted it anyway.
it wasnât just the big moments, either. sometimes he gave you roses just because. like when youâd meet him at the playground on a sunny afternoon, or when heâd knock on your window late at night to tell you about a new fort he wanted to build in the woods.
âanother one?â youâd tease, twirling the stem between your fingers.
âyep.â
âwhatâs it for this time?â
âi dunno. just wanted to give it to you.â
you never questioned it. rafe was rafe. the roses were just part of the deal.
but one day, when you were twelve, something changed.
heâd been quiet all afternoon, which wasnât like him. usually, rafe was the loudest person in the room, always cracking jokes or talking a mile a minute. but that day, as you sat side by side on the dock near his house, he barely said a word.
âwhatâs up with you?â you asked, nudging him with your elbow.
ânothing,â he muttered, staring at the water.
âyouâre lying.â
he looked at you then, his blue eyes serious in a way that made your stomach flip. after a long moment, he reached into his bag and pulled out another yellow rose.
âhere,â he said quietly.
you took it, studying his face. ârafe, whatâs wrong?â
ânothing,â he said again, but this time, he gave you a small smile. âi just wanted you to have it. thatâs all.â
you didnât push him. instead, you leaned your head against his shoulder, the rose resting in your lap.
âthanks,â you whispered.
âanytime,â he replied.
by the time you were twelve, the yellow roses were a part of you. a part of him. they showed up in places they didnât belongâpressed between notebook pages, tucked into old shoeboxes, even wilting in jars on your windowsill. you didnât really know why you kept them, but you couldnât throw them away. they were yours.
but then, something changed, again.
it happened on a random summer afternoon. the sun was blazing, and you were sprawled out in the cameron backyard, sipping lemonade while rafe fixed the broken tire swing.
âyouâre gonna break your neck,â you called out, watching him balance precariously on the wooden frame.
he rolled his eyes but didnât answer. rafe never did listen to you when it came to stuff like this.
when he finally hopped down, covered in dirt and grass, he didnât head straight for the lemonade like you expected. instead, he disappeared into the house without a word.
âwhat are you doing?â you shouted after him, but he didnât answer.
a few minutes later, he came back, holding something behind his back.
âclose your eyes,â he said, a grin tugging at his lips.
âwhy?â
âjust do it!â
you sighed but obeyed, covering your face with your hands. âthis better not be another bug.â
âitâs not,â he promised, laughing. âokay, open.â
when you did, he was standing there with a single white rose.
âwhatâs this for?â you asked, staring at the delicate petals.
he shrugged, looking almost shy. âjust thought youâd like it.â
âbut⌠why white?â
âi dunno,â he said, scratching the back of his neck.
you didnât know what to say, so you just smiled and took it from him, your fingers brushing against his for half a second. you didnât notice the way his cheeks turned pink, or the way he stared at you a little too long before turning back to the swing.
that was the first white rose.
after that, the yellow roses didnât come often anymore. instead, youâd find white onesâon your doorstep, in your locker, or handed over with a casual, âhere, this is for you.â
you never asked why.
by the time you were fourteen, white roses were the new normal. rafe had grown taller, his voice deeper, his confidence sharper. but when he gave you roses, he was still the same boy youâd known forever.
âfor me?â you asked one day, twirling the stem of yet another white rose.
âwho else?â he replied, grinning.
then came your sixteenth birthday. you didnât expect anything bigâjust a day at the beach with rafe, like always. but when he showed up at your door, he wasnât empty-handed.
âwhatâs this?â you asked, staring at the bouquet of pink roses in his hands.
he shrugged, but his usual confidence was missing. âbirthday gift,â he said, thrusting them toward you.
you took them, your heart racing. âtheyâre⌠really pretty.â
âyeah, well. so are you.â
the words hung in the air, heavier than they shouldâve been. you stared at him, your cheeks burning, and for the first time, you didnât know what to say.
by the time you were seventeen, things had changed. it wasnât just the way you and rafe had grown upâit was the way heâd changed.
you could see it the moment he introduced herâlily, the new girl with the perfect hair and the perfect laugh and the perfect smile. she was everything you werenât, and you hated how easily rafe seemed to fall for her.
but that wasnât the worst part.
the worst part was that the roses stopped.
it was a sudden thing. at first, there were other flowers��a bouquet of daisies here, a random tulip thereâbut never roses. not the yellow ones youâd grown used to, not the white ones or the pink ones that had become a quiet declaration between the two of you. just... no flowers.
at first, you told yourself it didnât matter. it didnât. rafe had a girlfriend now.
he didnât owe you roses anymore.
but you missed them. you missed the thoughtfulness, the friendship, the feeling that, no matter what, you still had a place in his life.
and then the your biggest fear came trueâhe stopped being your friend altogether.
lily didnât like how close you and rafe had been. she didnât want him hanging out with his girl best friend anymore. so rafe, being rafe, did what he always did when he felt cornered: he let go.
you didnât get it at first. heâd stopped answering your texts, stopped showing up at the usual spots. at school, heâd walk by you without even looking up. youâd sit at lunch, watching him and lily from the other side of the cafeteria, and it made your chest ache in a way you couldnât explain.
there were no more texts to plan beach trips or late-night talks. no more spontaneous hangouts. nothing.
you tried reaching out once, twice, even three times, but it was always the sameâshort answers, distant replies, the kind that made it clear he didnât want to try anymore.
it was too painful. so you stopped trying.
instead, you focused on other thingsâother people.
it wasnât like you didnât have friends, but the friends you had before had always been people who had fallen into your life by default. you had never needed to work for them. they were always there, easy to hold on to. but now, as you walked down the hallway of your high school with a new group of girlsâgirls who wanted to be your friends, who made an effort to include you, to laugh with you, to spend time with youâyou realized something important.
you were learning to let go too.
the girls were different. they were fun and supportive in ways you hadnât realized you were missing. no one ever told you to back off from their boyfriends. no one ever gave you that uncomfortable look when you were laughing too loudly with one of the guys in the group.
it was easier, in a way. no complications. no unspoken feelings. just fun, carefree friendships.
but you couldnât help but feel that gnawing ache in your chest whenever you saw rafe and lily together. it was like a quiet reminder that everything between you and him was over.
and then, one day, you saw it.
lily posted a story on instagramâa picture of a vase of flowers. they were bright and pretty, but there was something painfully obvious about them. they werenât roses.
never roses.
they were daisies. lilies. tulips.
anything but roses.
you looked over at your new group of friendsâlaughing at something ridiculous, pulling you into their conversationâand for the first time in a long while, you realized something important: you were okay.
no, you werenât fine. you missed rafe. you missed your best friend. but you werenât going to stay in the past.
there was a part of you that hoped rafe would realize what heâd lost, that maybe, one day, heâd come back and apologize. but for now, you had other things to focus on.
and maybe that was enough for now.
but still, you didnât expect to see rafe cameron waiting for you after school.
the day had been uneventfulâjust the usual classes, the usual laughs with your friends, the usual reminder in the back of your mind that rafe wasnât part of your world anymore.
but there he was. leaning against the wall near the parking lot, his hands shoved deep in his pockets, his hair a mess like heâd been running his fingers through it all day.
your first instinct was to ignore him. he hadnât spoken to you in months. months. heâd chosen lily, chosen her rules, chosen to let go of everything youâd shared.
but something about the way he lookedâlost, broken, sadâstopped you.
you stepped closer, hesitant. ârafe?â
his head snapped up, his blue eyes locking onto yours. for a second, he didnât say anything, just stared at you like he couldnât believe you were real.
âhey,â he said finally, his voice hoarse.
âwhat are you doing here?â you asked, your tone sharper than you meant it to be.
he flinched, but he didnât back down. âi... i needed to see you.â
âwhy?â
âbecauseââ he broke off, running a hand through his hair. âbecause i screwed up. and because i didnât know where else to go.â
you crossed your arms, trying to ignore the way your chest tightened. âwhat about lily?â
he laughed, but it wasnât a happy sound. âsheâs gone. we broke up.â
âoh.â
you didnât know what else to say. part of you wanted to walk away, to tell him it wasnât your problem anymore. but the other partâthe bigger part, the one that still caredâcouldnât do it.
âcome on,â you said, jerking your head toward your car.
he blinked, surprised. âreally?â
âyeah,â you muttered. âletâs go.â
the drive back to your house was quiet, the air between you heavy with things unsaid. when you got home, you led him to your room, just like you always used to.
he sat on the edge of your bed, looking around like he couldnât believe he was there again. âyou changed it,â he said, his voice soft.
âyeah,â you replied, sitting cross-legged on the other side. âitâs been a while.â
he nodded, staring down at his hands. âiâm sorry.â
âfor what?â
âfor everything. for shutting you out. for choosing her. for being an idiot.â
you didnât say anything, letting the silence stretch between you.
âi missed you,â he said finally, his voice barely above a whisper.
you looked at him then, really looked at him, and you saw itâthe boy youâd grown up with, the one who used to make you laugh until your stomach hurt, the one who always brought you roses.
âi missed you too,â you admitted.
his head snapped up, his eyes filled with something you couldnât quite name. âyeah?â
âyeah,â you said, smiling faintly. âbut youâre still an idiot.â
he laughed, and for a moment, it was like nothing had changed.
you talked for hours, just like you used to. about everything and nothing, about the way life had shifted and the things youâd both been through. it was easy, familiar, like slipping back into an old rhythm.
when he finally stood to leave, you followed him to the door, your heart heavier than you wanted to admit.
âthanks for... for letting me in,â he said, his hand lingering on the doorknob.
âyouâre always welcome,â you said softly.
he nodded, gave you one last look, and then he was gone.
when you turned back toward your room, something caught your eyeâa splash of color on your bed.
frowning, you walked closer, and your breath caught in your throat.
a single purple rose rested on your pillow.
you picked it up, your fingers trembling as you held it to your chest.
you sank onto the bed, staring at the flower, your mind spinning.
he hadnât said it, but he didnât need to. the rose said everything he couldnât.
and for the first time in a long while, you felt like maybeâjust maybeâyou and rafe werenât finished after all.
by the time you were eighteen, you and rafe had found your way back to each other.
it hadnât been easy, not at first. there were awkward silences, half-finished sentences, and moments where you both stumbled over how to act around each other. but slowly, the cracks healed. the space between you shrank. and before you knew it, you were best friends again, just like youâd been before everything fell apart.
except now, things were different in a way you couldnât quite put your finger on. it wasn't different as in your roses changed from yellow to white, it was just... different.
rafe spent more time with you and your friends than he did with his own. heâd show up at your place unannounced, invite himself to girlsâ nights, and make himself at home in your little world. your friends loved himâwho wouldnât? he was funny, charming, and could win over just about anyone with a crooked smile and a well-timed joke.
and then there were the roses.
at first, it had felt like slipping back into an old routine. rafe had always given you flowersâyellow for friendship, white for something deeper, pink for gratitude and love. so when he started showing up with four roses every time he saw you, you didnât think much of it.
a pink rose, soft and sweet. a white rose, pure and delicate. a yellow rose, bright and cheerful. and a dark pink rose, richer, deeper, full of meaning you didnât quite understand.
âwhatâs this for?â youâd ask every time, your voice teasing.
âdo i need a reason?â heâd reply, smirking as he handed them over.
youâd roll your eyes, tuck them into a vase, and move on.
it wasnât until one friday night, when rafe wasnât there, that your friends brought it up.
you were sprawled out on your living room floor with your two best friends, abby and jen, eating popcorn and flipping through magazines. the absence of rafeâs usual presence was noticeable, but you didnât mention it.
âso,â abby said, sitting up and tossing a kernel into her mouth. âare you and rafe, like... a thing?â
you blinked, startled. âwhat?â
jen raised an eyebrow. âyou and rafe. are you dating?â
you laughed, the sound a little too loud. âno. what? no way. weâre just friends.â
âjust friends?â abby repeated, her tone skeptical.
âyes,â you said firmly. âweâve been best friends since we were kids. thatâs all it is.â
jen exchanged a look with abby, then turned back to you. âokay, but... the roses?â
âwhat about them?â
âhe gives you flowers every time he sees you!â abby said, throwing her hands up.
âso? heâs always done that.â
âalways?â jen asked, her eyes wide.
âyeah,â you said with a shrug. âsince we were six.â
both girls gaped at you like youâd just confessed to a crime.
âyouâre telling me,â abby said slowly, âthat rafe cameron has been giving you flowers for twelve years, and youâve never thought it was weird?â
âitâs not weird,â you said defensively. âitâs just... a thing we do. it doesnât mean anything.â
âit definitely means something,â jen said, crossing her arms. âguys donât give roses to their best friends for over a decade unless theyâre in love with them.â
âheâs not in love with me,â you said, rolling your eyes.
âbabe,â abby said, leaning forward. âdark pink roses? those mean, like, admiration and gratitude, but also... y��know. romance.â
you opened your mouth to argue, but the words stuck in your throat.
âand white roses? purity. pink? love. yellow? friendship. heâs literally giving you every part of him in flower form,â jen added.
you stared at them, your mind racing.
âheâs... heâs just being rafe,â you said weakly.
âexactly,â abby said. âand rafe is in love with you.â
their words echoed in your head long after the conversation ended, and when you went to bed that night, your eyes drifted to the vase on your desk.
four roses. pink, white, yellow, dark pink.
youâd never questioned them before. but now, for the first time, you wondered if maybeâjust maybeâthere was more to them than youâd ever let yourself believe.
your nineteenth birthday was minutes away, and you were already in bed.
well, technically you were sitting on your bed, legs crossed, scrolling through your phone while waiting for the clock to hit midnight. your hair was twisted into perfect curls, your nose strip was firmly in place, and your face was freshly moisturizedâyour skincare routine impeccable as always.
you werenât expecting anything. your friends had already promised to make a big deal out of it tomorrow, and you figured the actual moment of your birthday would pass quietly, just you and your phone and a sleepy smile.
but then you heard the faint scrape of your window.
at first, you froze. was someone trying to break in?
ârelax,â came a familiar voice, low and teasing. âitâs just me.â
ârafe?â
you slid off your bed, rushing to the window to find him perched on the ledge, one hand gripping the frame, the other holding something behind his back.
âwhat are you doing?â you hissed, trying to keep your voice down. âitâs midnight!â
âexactly,â he said, flashing that boyish grin that always got him out of trouble. âhappy birthday.â
you blinked, completely thrown off. âyou climbed up here for that?â
he shrugged, effortlessly pulling himself through the window and into your room. âyouâre worth it.â
âyouâre insane.â
âand youâve got... something on your nose,â he said, his gaze locking onto the strip.
your cheeks flushed. youâd completely forgotten about your skincare situation.
âoh my god, i look ridiculous,â you muttered, turning away from him.
âno, you look... like you,â he said, his voice softer now.
you glanced back at him, narrowing your eyes. âwhatâs that supposed to mean?â
âit means i like you better like this,â he said simply. âno makeup, no filters, just... you.â
before you could respond, he brought his hand forward, revealing the bouquet heâd been holding.
âhere,â he said, holding it out to you.
you stared at it, your heart doing a strange little flip. the roses were beautifulâsoft pastel purple, deep dark purple, a single vivid red, and of course, the familiar yellow.
ârafe,â you whispered, taking them from him. âyou didnât have toââ
âyeah, i did,â he cut you off. âyou deserve them.â
ârafe...â you started, but the words wouldnât come.
he shrugged like it was no big deal, but the way he looked at you told you otherwise. âhappy birthday,â he said again, his voice soft, his eyes searching yours.
you stared at him, your heart thudding in your chest. the weight of the flowers in your hands, the warmth in his gaze, the fact that heâd climbed through your window just to be the first to see you on your birthdayâit was all too much and somehow just enough.
âthank you,â you whispered, your voice unsteady.
he stepped closer, his hand brushing against yours as you clutched the bouquet.
âyouâre everything to me, you know that?â he said, the words tumbling out like he couldnât hold them back any longer.
your heart stopped for a moment, then started again, faster, louder.
ârafe...â
he shook his head, his hands moving to gently frame your face. âyou donât have to say anything. just... can Iâ?â
he didnât finish the sentence, but you understood.
âyes,â you breathed, barely able to get the word out.
he leaned in slowly, giving you plenty of time to pull away, but you didnât. when his lips brushed yours, it was soft at first, tentative, like he was afraid youâd disappear.
but then you kissed him back, and something inside both of you broke free.
the roses slipped from your hands onto the bed, forgotten as you melted into him, your arms winding around his neck, his fingers tangling gently in your curls.
when you finally pulled back, your forehead rested against his, both of you breathing heavily, the world outside your room completely forgotten.
âhappy birthday,â he whispered again, his smile so full of affection it made your chest ache.
âbest one yet,â you replied, your own smile matching his.
and as he stayed by your side, your head resting on his shoulder, the roses scattered around you, you couldnât imagine a better way to start a new year of your life.
and for years, you kept them allâpressed between the pages of your favorite books, tucked into jars on your windowsill, little pieces of rafe that made you feel like the most important person in the world.
because to him, you were.
#lizzieswritesđđ#rafe cameron x reader#drew starkey x reader#rafe cameron imagine#obx rafe cameron#rafe cameron#rafe x you#rafe imagine#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron x you#drew starkey imagine#drew starkey x you#drew starkey#outer banks x reader
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â Ë・â ᥣđŠ â Ë・â
âtake off your top.â the man on the couch across from you barks with a toothy grin, prying eyes focused on you as he puts a bottle of beer to his lips.
you know rafe doesnât like playing games at his parties. itâs so below him, heâd rather sit back and relax, for once leaving the chaos up to everyone else. in the comfort of his own home he can truly let loose. now that tannyhill is technically his, he couldnât care less if someone breaks one of the gauche vases rose picked out, or puts a hole in one of the walls â heâs too busy seizing the opportunity to drink, smoke, or snort whatever he pleases.
you like it when heâs chill, it gives you the opportunity to get exactly what you want out of him. you caught him at the perfect time â nursing a drink, swirling the brown liquid in his glass as he nodded along to something topper was saying. you seized the moment, attaching yourself to his side. âcome on, rafey! please, itâll be fun!â you bounced like a little bunny, slipping your hand in his to sweeten the deal. âplease, please, please â i donât wanna play by myself.â
ânah, babe. truth or dare? thatâs some fuckinâ high school shit.â
âplease, just this once?â you press your cheek against his arm, pushing your cherry-glossed lips into a pout.
thatâs how you end up perched on his lap, your boyfriend tucked comfortably into the couch on his porch. youâre really regretting it all now, the feeling of everyones eyes on you makes your skin crawl. you wish you could just disappear, caught like a deer in headlights, sputtering as you peer around the room.
rafe breathes out a laugh, and the room quiets in anticipation. he adjusts his position to lean forward, his hand squeezing your thigh like a stress ball.
âwhatâd you say?â
âi think everyone heard me.â the boy gawks, still watching you.
âthatâs funny.â
âiâm not joking. itâs the game, bro.â
your face feels red hot, matching the heat you feel radiating from rafe. youâre afraid to move, your eyes only shifting to your boyfriends face, who youâve never seen so angry.
ânah, nah, youâre real funny, man.â he hooks his hand under one of your legs, the other arm around your back to lift you up off his lap, dropping you haphazardly on the couch cushion beside the two of you as he pushes himself out of the seat to confront the kid.
ârafe!â
heâs already got the boy by the collar by the time topper and kelce try to stop him, your hands fly over your mouth as you watch it all unfold before you. rafe shakes him, âyouâre a comedian, huh? you think iâm about to let you disrespect not only me, but my girl, in my fuckinâ house?â he raises his voice, everyone else completely silent as he shoves the kid toward the door. âtake that shit somewhere else, get the fuck out.â
rafeâs shoulders heave, watching the boy scamper away with his tail between his legs before he turns around, looking at you. âgameâs over, letâs go.â he cocks his head, and you jump out of your seat to follow him, leaving the room stuck in a stunned silence.
â Ë・â ᥣđŠ â Ë・â
#i accidentally wrote smort in the second paragraph and cried laughing#obx#rafe cameron#rafe cameron x reader#rafe x reader#rafe cameron drabble#rafe cameron headcanon
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A little couple's trivia with Nanami proves that he knows you all too well.
I did use the term wife and she/her pronouns just as a brief cw. The whole thing is just fluff. Nanami is in love with you. That's the whole things.
(I am delulu and in love with this man. Hope this helps us all heal. He is alive and well and no one can convince me otherwise. Also I love including Gojo's dumbass in everything. Also Yuji is a sweetheart and Nanami's son basically.)
"Please?" You're practically begging your husband, who doesn't seem to be budging.
"No."
"Why not?"
"Yeah Nanamin-"
"Don't call me that." Nanami cuts Gojo off immediately.
"But Yuji calls you that!"
"That's different." He glares at the white haired man like he's trying to eviscerate him with just his eyes. "And I'm not playing some stupid game just to prove how well I know my wife." He tries to pay attention to the paperwork in front of him again, wanting to finish it before 5pm. Because there was no way he was working overtime again today.
"Scared?" Gojo baited him. "Afraid I'm gonna ask you a question that's just too hard?"
"Gojo, there is nothing you could ask me about my wife that I wouldn't be able to answer."
A few of the students sat around watching the two go back and forth, inevitably waiting for Nanami to either get so annoyed that he walked away, or to take the bait. They hoped for the latter.
"Prove it! Or you forfeit your marriage."
"That's not how that works."
"C'mon Nanamin, it's just a game." Yuji gives the blonde sorcerer a sincere smile, hoping to lighten the mood and sway his decision just a bit.
"Don't call him Nanamin, Yuji- OW." Gojo is cut off as Nanami reaches over and smacks him in the head with the papers in his hand.
"Don't tell him what to do." Nanami sighs and rubs at his temple. He looks at the clock, then at you. It's the look in your eyes that gives way to his final decision. "Fine. You have until that clock reads 5, and then I'm taking my wife and we're going home."
Gojo wastes no time. "Who is your wife's favorite person? And think before you say yourself because-"
"Itadori. Next question."
"I'm your favorite person?!" Yuji jumps from his seat, latching his arms around you for a hug. It's obvious from the way that you smile and hug him back that Nanami is probably definitely right. You had a soft spot for the kid since you met him, playfully telling everyone that you and Nanami had basically adopted him since he arrived at Jujutsu High. Nanami would probably never verbalize it, but you could tell he felt the same about the boy.
"Ok, ok. Next question." Gojo thought hard before coming up with it. "How does your wife take her coffee?"
"She doesn't drink coffee."
"Yes she does, I bring her some like every morning."
"And she gives that coffee to me because she doesn't like it."
"You're telling me I've been buying you coffee this entire time?"
"I make her tea every morning when we get to work. You hand her the coffee, we trade cups. I don't understand how you've stared right at us when we do it and you somehow haven't noticed."
"Ok, then what tea does she drink?"
"Earl Grey, three sugars, a little bit of milk at the top. She'll say she's ok with English Breakfast or Lady Earl Grey if they're out of the regular. She's not, she's just being polite. She'll drink half and throw it away when she thinks no one is looking."
Gojo groans, not having as much fun as he thought he was going to at the beginning of all of this. "And I just bet you have a contingency plan for when your wife doesn't get her tea, don't you?"
"Of course I do," he ignores the even louder groan from Gojo, "I walk across the street to the cafe that sells her favorite pastries and I buy her five because I know that she'll want to share with her students and she'll try to split one with me even if I refuse. They have teabags they leave out so long as you're ordering something. Earl Grey, always in stock."
"Adorable." Gojo rolls his eyes.
"You're so smart, Nanamin!" Yuji jumps in. "Let me ask one! What's her favorite color?"
"Yuji, that's too easy."
"Yellow."
"Ohhhh, mine too," Yuji says, "why yellow?"
"Because it's-" Nanami stops mid-sentence and looks at the clock, like it will give him an excuse. Almost. "We don't need to worry about the why, that wasn't the original question."
Gojo perks up, clearly realizing he'd struck a nerve. And he was ready to work it. The red dusting across Nanami's cheeks told him everything he needed to know. "Are you embarrassed, Nanami?"
"Shut up, Gojo."
"Or do you just not know the answer? It's ok if you don't, I guess you just don't know your wife as well as you thought you did."
"If you don't stop talking, I'm going to tell everyone about the one time in high school when you and Geto got caught in the-"
"OK!" Gojo turns back to the students and motions them toward the door. "Time to go! Don't you all have something better to do? Go be little trouble makers somewhere. Go TP Yaga's lawn or something. Get out of here."
He'd ushered everyone out except Yuji, who stayed behind to wait for you and Nanami. The boy shyly looked away as you kissed Nanami's cheek before standing up, stating you just needed to grab your bag before you could leave.
Yuji waited for you to exit the room before he asked. "Is it because of your hair?"
Nanami sighs. "What makes you think that?"
Yuji just shrugs. "She loves you. Answers don't always need a complex reason."
Nanami can't help the smile that graces his face. "You're a smart kid sometimes, you know that?"
"That's why I'm her favorite!" His goofy nature is back in an instant. "Can I come over for dinner again tonight?"
"Of course you can."
"Can I stay over?"
"If you'd like to."
"Can I pick the movie we watch?"
"Don't push your luck."
#jjk fluff#jjk headcanons#jjk x reader#nanami fluff#nanami x y/n#nanami kento#nanami x reader#jjk nanami#nanami x you#kento nanami#yuji itadori#jjk itadori#papamin
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âbabe. baaaabe. babe!â
âwhat, satoru?â you ask sharply, looking up from your laptop to where your boyfriend has spread himself across your couch, his legs in shokoâs lap.Â
he lifts his shades to look at you. âwas i your first crush?â
âyes,â you answer quickly.
you immediately return to the report youâre writing, missing the face shoko makes before she says, âthatâs not true.âÂ
âieiri,â you whisper harshly, but itâs too late. your boyfriendâs already jumped off the couch to lean his palms against your desk.Â
âwhat? i wasnât your first?!â
âyou were,â you insist, glaring at your friend. âshoko is clearly misremembering things.â
âam i though?â
âyou know what, itâs fine,â gojo sighs, slipping his shades back on and rolling the sleeve of his t-shirt up so he can flex. âobviously iâm way cooler than whatever lame schmuck high school you was crushing on.â
behind him, shokoâs scoff is the final nail in your coffin. ânanami is way cooler than you ever were.â
you slap your forehead, bracing yourself for gojoâs inevitable overreaction.Â
but he doesnât get the chance, interrupted by a light knock against your doorframe from, you guessed it, nanami kento.
âyaga said you wanted to see me?â
cue overreaction.
âyou had a crush onâ on him?âÂ
nanami swats gojoâs finger away from his cheek.Â
âoh my god,â your boyfriend breathes, currently experiencing a quarterlife crisis. âyou liked this emo nemo?â
nanami ignores him, sending you a questioning look. âhe doesnât know?â
âwhat is it now?â satoru asks, slumping back into the couch. âdid you guys go on a date or something?âÂ
your lack of answer is enough for him to let his head fall back rather dramatically.Â
âcan you blame her?â shoko asks. âhe was sexy back then. in an edgy, mysterious kind of way. meanwhile, you were likeâŚif a string bean made love to a cauliflower.âÂ
even gojo doesnât have a witty retort prepared for that.Â
you decide to clear this up once and for all. âit wasnât just about looks. you were busy afterâ after riko. you didnât have time for a relationship orâŚfor me. you wanted to get stronger and i didnât want to get in your way.â
âyou wouldnât have beenââ
âi would have.â you shrug. because you know him, and you know what he was like. âand thatâs okay because we were still kids, satoru. and it was only one date! no need to get so torn up about it!â
_____
âwhat is this?â you ask later that night, when you find satoru hauling a huge box into your apartment.
âitâs a bowflex!â gojo explains proudly, patting the unopened box. âshoko said that i was built like a string bean, so iâm gonna buff up like nanami! and when megumi moves out next year, iâm gonna turn his room into a gym.â
you lean in the doorway, amused. nanami also has a home gym. âis that why youâre also wearing a suit and tie instead of your usual uniform?â
he does a show spin, letting you take it all in. you donât even want to know how much it must have cost. âdo you like it?âÂ
âyou do look very handsome.âÂ
âi know,â he winks, cocky as ever. ânow watch this.â
he brushes a few strands of hair over his eyes, lowering his voice a few octaves as he says, âtaxes. office work. satoru, i respect you so much!â
you walk up to him, brushing the hair back to press a kiss to his forehead. ânanami would never say that last thing, but i do like the effort.âÂ
he loops his arms around your waist, returning the kiss and murmuring against your skin, âdid it turn you on though? maybe i should get an office jobââ
âsatoru,â you whine, resting your forehead against his chest. âit was just a short-lived crush. and it was forever ago! iâm pretty sure youâve had crushes that werenât me.â
ânope,â he hums, resting his chin atop your head. âall iâve ever wanted is you. all iâve ever neededâŚis you.âÂ
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making the bed |carmen berzatto x reader| part one
prompt: carmen's stressed. food critics, a newborn baby, balancing work life and married life and now dad life; he's bound to break, everyone knows it. but no one ever thought he'd lash out on you.
or, part one of the devastation fic. based off this ask from the other day. two more parts to come.
contains: mega angst. mega angst, with no resolution in this part. hurt, no comfort (in this chapter, will be later in part 3). mean!carmen, very mean. mom!reader x dad!carmen with newborn teddy. fighting, language, carmen says mean stuff he doesn't mean. past mentions of trauma, family trauma, mikey mentioned. very angsty and a little heavy, please read at your own discretion. word count- 3.5k+.
"Are you ok?"
Carmen now understood why that phrase used to send Donna into such a blind rage, lips pursing and jaw clenching more and more every time he heard it. First at work, then with you, it felt never ending.
It was beginning to feel like critic season with how many were coming in, snooty and demanding to be impressed. It couldn't have come at a worst time, right in the middle of busy season with the start of the holidays. Days at The Bear were filled with frantic panic, running around, making sure everything was perfect, accounted for, and Carmen always had the sinking feeling it wasn't- that he'd forgotten something, messed something up.Â
It wasn't rare for him to work himself up like this, a normal that you always warned him about, but he'd always had a solitude. As long as he'd known you, he'd had a place to go, to unwind, to let himself rest and reset with you. And he still did, it was just shared now with a newborn.
Dorothea Michelle. Teddy, for short. The light of his life, yours too. Nearly two months old with a set of lungs that sounded much louder, much more developed than that. Nights were long, sleepless, spent trying to lull Teddy back to sleep, awake even if he wasn't up with her. Carmen couldn't allow himself the selfishness to relax, to rewind, to "take it easy" like everyone told him to. At work, he was the boss; at home, he was a dad.
"Fuck, fuck," Carmen's sleepy stare was broken by a lick of bubbling heat, the lamb's roux popping with the high heat, splashing all over Carmen's chef whites.
"Jeff, c'mon," Tina clicked, shaking her head, moving the pan to lower heat. "What're you doin'?"
Carmen grit his teeth, snatching a rag off the stainless steel counter tops, scrubbing the burgundy stain, huffing when it only spread the stain.
"What happened?" Sydney turned, looking from the burnt sauce to Carmen's stained chef shirt. "Oh,"
"Do we have a spare coat?" Carmen huffed, throwing the rag down with a firm smack against the counter.
"I don't think so, Carm." Sydney shook her head. "You took the last ones home with you two days ago. The wine-"
"-I know, Chef, I know." Carmen snapped, running a hand through his hair. "Fuck, I-I can't fuckin' serve the critics lookin' like this. With shit all over me- fuck."
"Hey, easy, easy," Richie turned the corner, his hands held up. "What's goin' on?"
"Jeff got sauce over him. He doesn't have any clean clothes." Tina muttered, irritated that she had to fix his mess, more irritated that he wasn't taking care of himself. You have a baby, Jeff, you need to rest and take some time, she'd told him. Carmen only waved her off.
"Okay, okay, hey, that's no problem." Richie's voice raised, lifting over Carmen's. "You go home and change, get your spare, check on my beautiful goddaughter, and then come back with your A game. Yes?"
Carmen didn't even humor him with a snarky remark, yanking his coat off and stomping towards the office to grab his things. Richie and Tina looked at each other, shaking their head gently.
"Kids runnin' thin, T." Richie muttered with a sigh. "He's gonna break. It's gonna be bad."
"Yeah, he is. Gonna wear himself out before then." Tina shook her head. "Jeff needs a vacation." They both jumped at the slamming of the backdoor, Carmen's angry exit shaking the foundation.
"Needs to be fuckin' medicated. Fuckin' lunatic." Richie scoffed, rolling his eyes at Carmen's dramatics.
The drive home was filled with silence, Carmen's iron grip on the wheel, tearing through the traffic towards the house- his house, his home.Â
Home, but it didn't provide the same comfort that it usually did. Carmen's shoulders still stayed tense, buzzing with rage, not dissipating when he thought of you, or of Teddy, knowing you'd both be there, excited to see him.Â
You jumped at the sound of the car door slamming, peeking out the window to see Carmen's parked next to yours, furiously stomping up the front steps. You frowned, grabbing the baby monitor, walking towards the front door.
Carmen nearly hit you with how fiercely he flung the door open. "Woah," You reached for the door, stopping it before he could flick it shut. "Carm, don't slam it. Teddy's asleep. I just got her down." You frowned at him, shutting it slowly.
Carmen looked at you but didn't speak, looking through you with a rage that had your spine tingling before he finally broke his gaze, stomping towards the laundry room. "Carm? Whatâre you doing home? Donât you have dinner soon?" You hesitated slightly, lingering in the doorway with an uncertainty you hadnât felt with Carmen before.Â
Carmen didnât answer, his jaw still ground tight while he rummaged through the clean clothes, carelessly unfolding and shifting the folded clothes.
"Carmen," You said more firmly, caching his gaze. He didn't speak still, just stared at you- through you. "Are you ok?" You lifted a brow, features softening in worry.
Carmen paused, eyes closing, shoulders tensing in agitation. Are you ok? His ears rang, a familiar rage that he hadn't felt in years bubbling up deep in his chest. Frustrated and blinding and rampant, heat rushing through his veins, pulling himself further and further from reality into someplace different- someplace darker in his mind.Â
"What's wrong?" You pressed, he could barely hear it, ears ringing at your question. "Did something happen? Did the critic come-"
"-Where's my chef whites?" Carmen barked, cutting you off, his chest tightening more and more with every heavy heave of his chest. You flinched at his tone.
"Uh, I-I haven't seen the whites. I washed your white tee-"
â-You what? Y-You what?â Carmen spat, eye widening with a wild, raged glint in his eye. Your stomach flipped and fell with fear, stepping back instinctively.Â
âI-I washed your tee, Carm, thatâs all that you left in the laundry basket-âÂ
"-Are you fucking kidding me?" Carmen boomed, his head spinning, body buzzing with rage. Your breath hitched, frozen in fear at the anger in his tone, the roar of his voice bouncing off the walls, echoing through your ears in a painful drum.Â
Carmen moved, snatching the dirty clothes basket, dumping it into the ground with a shake until the dirty chef coat fell on top. He gripped the basket, flinging it across the room with a hard throw. The final push to his bad mood that sent him right over the edge, crashing into a pit of blinding fury, aggravation, breaking him from the inside out.
"Fuck!" Carmen roared, his voice shaking the walls, your breath leaving your lungs in a trembling exhale of fear. âFuck, fuck, fuck! This is- This is- Are you fuckinâ kiddinâ me?âÂ
You tensed in shock, gripping the baby monitor in fear, maybe surprise, as it started to buzz to life with Teddy's startled whimpers. Her small cries pulled you out of your frozen state, something deeper than fear replacing the ache in your stomach.Â
"Carmen-" You gaped, voice wobbling with uncertainty, taking slow shuffled steps towards the stairs. âCarmen, calm-calm down. Ok? Calm down.âÂ
âCalm down? You want me to fuckinâ calm down?â Carmen sneered, an angry red flush blossoming in splotchy deep hues up his neck, towards his cheeks. âYou donât do shit, nothinâ that I fuckinâ ask for! Just sit around all fuckinâ day an-and Iâm supposed to calm down?âÂ
âCarmen,â Your voice wobbled, throat tight with tears, hurt and fear strangling your words. âI-You didnât ask me to wash them. I-I didnât know. They werenât in the hamper-âÂ
â-I shouldnât have to ask you to wash them!â Carmen roared, eyes so wide you thought they might pop right out of his head, neck vein protruding on exemplifying his rage. âYou know what Iâm going through! You know how much fuckinâ stress Iâm under! I go to that-that shit hole, an-and work my fuckinâ ass off so you donât have to! Then I come home, and I-I canât even get a second of peace!âÂ
âStop,â You hiss, finally regaining your composure, his words fully sinking into you now, feeling the full effect of them. âI-I just had a baby. Iâm still on maternity leave taking care of a baby- our baby, and Iâm tired too. But Iâm not yelling at you-âÂ
â-Oh, right. Right.â Carmen laughs sarcastically, humorless as he runs his hand down his face. It felt mocking, left you feeling small and too vulnerable for your liking. âBecause in between your napping an-and feeding, you couldnât stick a fucking jacket in the wash, right? Youâre so busy.â Â
âWhat is wrong with you?â You snap, hoping he canât hear the tears in your voice, the way your voice shakes with emotion.Â
âWhatâs wrong with me? Whatâs wrong with me?â Carmen scoffs, throwing his hands out. âI get no fuckin' sleep, go work my fuckin' ass off, a-and then I come home so I can go back and work my ass off some more, and-and you canât do one simple fuckinâ thing? You canât help me out? And then you wanna know whatâs wrong with me? When you sit on your ass all fuckinâ day-âÂ
Teddyâs piercing wail pulls you out of your shocked trance, nose and throat burning with hurt filled tears you refuse to shed. Instead, you turn, climbing the stairs on shaky legs, the sound of Teddyâs cries growing louder and louder. Anchovy watches you from the top of the stairs, sensing the tension, your upset, sliding against your leg as if to comfort you.Â
Carmen scoffs, hands buzzing and trembling with rage, the ringing in his ears growing louder and louder with each of your footsteps on the stairs and down the hall. He can barely hear Teddyâs sobs, hands threading through his hair, pulling at his scalp. He sees you walk towards the bedroom, quickly, hugging Teddy to your chest.Â
âOh, donât go fuckinâ do it now!â Carmen roared, your ignoring him only infuriating him further. âIt wonât be ready in time now. Iâll just look like a fuckinâ idiot for the critic tonight! Not that you care! Why would you, huh? I-I mean just our livelihood, just our fuckinâ income!âÂ
You swallowed back your tears, head tilting towards the ceiling, hands shaking with every shove of your things into the overnight bag. Just enough to get you through the night, the next day. A few essentials, Teddyâs spare onesies, a charger, your wallet- you stopped mid-shove of your items into the weekender bag, the sunâs rays catching in your wedding ring. Your heart fell, more and more, you werenât sure how that was even possible.Â
Carmenâs furious voice was still booming from downstairs, ringing and shaking in his furious fit. Richie and Sugar both warned you about Carmenâs tantrums, brought them up to embarrass him, tease him about it until he was red faced and hissing hushed threats at them. You never, never in your wildest dreams thought youâd be on the receiving end of one.Â
You jumped, another slam of something Carmen had thrown, maybe hit in a fit of rage, causing Teddy to wail louder, Anchovy skittering nervously away. Tears leaked out of your eyes, twisting the ring off your finger, setting it on Carmenâs bedside table. Pulling the carrier out of the closet, Anchovy got in much easier than usual, which you were thankful for.Â
Carmen was gripping the marble of the countertop when he heard you again, walking from the bottom of the stairs, quick steps towards the door to the garage, Teddyâs voice nearly hoarse from her crying. You kept your head high, tunnel-visioned towards your car, ignoring his heavy breathing and frantic pacing.Â
âWha-What are you doinâ?â Carmenâs voice was softer now, still with a jagged edge that was cutting and harsh. The car door opened, the baby carrier hooked into the car seat.Â
âHey, wha- what are you- whereâre you goinâ? Whatâre you doinâ?â Carmenâs heart dropped in a damning rush of hour, stumbling on heavy legs towards the garage. You ignored him, shushing Teddy gently, running a calming hand over her wet cheek, trying to coax her paci into her mouth.Â
âBaby, no-no, no. Hey, no, I-I- What-â Carmenâs chest felt tight, mind numbing and racing, stuttering nervously. You reached for your bag, his hand reaching to grab the strap. âWhe-Whereâre you-â
â-Donât touch me.â You hissed, teeth bared, eyes shining with tears. Carmen flinched, pulling his hand back like heâd touched a hot stove. âDonât you dare fucking touch me.â You sneered, pinning him with a watery glare that had his stomach turning in sickening fear.Â
âBaby, hey, w-wait-Câmon, d-donât-You donât, you donât need to do this, ok? I-Iâm sorry, Iâm sorry.â Carmen choked out the words, frantic and unsure, his hands shaking when they ghosted over you back just for a moment. Wanting to touch you, to hold you, to grab you and keep you from leaving, but too scared to. Instead, he grabbed the car door you flung open, holding it when you tried to yank it closed.Â
âLet go.â You hissed, sniffling back wet, snotty tears of fury and hurt.Â
âPlease, donât-do-donât do this. Please, baby, I-Iâm sorry.â Carmen begged, blue eyes deepening with the burning red hues of tears, bloodshot and lashes wet. âDonât-Donât do this-âÂ
â-I didnât do this.â You sneered, leaving Carmen flinching at your words. âDonât you dare try to say this was me. After how you just talked to me? The shit you said to me in there? You think Iâm going to stay?â Your voice cracked with emotion, lips pressing together to keep a cry in.Â
âNo, no, no, no, no, baby, please. Please, ju-just come inside. Come inside, please? Please, donât-âÂ
âYou donât get to talk to me like that. To say that kinda stuff to me. That hurt, Carmen. That was mean.â You glared at him, tears leaking out of the corner of his eyes. âI donât care if youâre stressed. I donât care whatâs going on- nothing, and I mean nothing, warrants you talking to me like that. Just because you fucked up, because you forgot to ask me to do it, because youâre stressed out- I donât care what it is. You donât talk to me like that, say those things when Iâve been home all day taking care of my ch- our child.â You nod back towards the sniffling baby, whimpering and crying half heartedly, her little eyelids drooping with sleep that was interrupted.Â
Carmen felt sick, his knees tightening in fear, he was sure they might give out, that he might fall to the ground right there. Looking at the tiny baby, lip jutted and shaking in the mirror hooked on the back of the seat, then back at you, eyes red-rimmed and glaring at him with a hurt filled anger.Â
âDonât-â Carmenâs chest shook, a white-knuckled grip on the door.Â
Your own hand curled around the doorâs inner handle, yanking it away from him. âMove,â You hissed, pulling again.Â
Carmen wasnât sure why he let it go, why he let you shut it, locking the door in case he tried to open it again. Why he let you pull out of the driveway, why he didnât stop you, why he didnât run after you, only taking soft shuffles down the drive like a zombie as you drove away. Standing in the drive, Carmen swallowed down the spit that pooled in his mouth, stomach churning, sure he was going to be sick.Â
He managed to trudge back to the garage, mind racing and far away, the ringing in his ears dulling but still deafening. It felt like he was in a dream- a nightmare, a hallucinating trance that felt like a sick, sick dream- Carmen was hoping it was. That heâd wake up and find you next to him asleep. That he could hug you, pull you into him, nose buried in your neck, still warm from your slumber.Â
As the sun began to sink low into the sky, minutes turning into hours that Carmen sat motionless in the garage, staring in a trancelike state, he realized that this wasnât a dream or a nightmare. No this was his reality, a horrific reality that heâd made into his own. Carmen sat, eyes trained on the concrete of the garage, voice racing and blending in his mind- his words, yours, Teddyâs cries, Natalie and Richieâs, flashbacks of his mother screaming fits.Â
He didnât move, frozen in chilling, eerie fear. What ifs and terrifying possible scenarios, consequences to his own actions that left him feeling sick, hands trembling. A spiraling of fears that only drug him deeper and deeper with every haunting replay of his outburst. Even the flashing of headlights turning into the driveway, filling the garage with light, didnât pull him from his trance.Â
âThe fuck is he- Cousin!â Richie roared, laying on the horn. Carmen didnât move, didnât acknowledge that he heard it, only stared. Richie frowned, turning the car off, throwing the door open.Â
âCousin? Carm? What-What are you doinâ? Dinner service started an hour ago. Syd is freakinâ the fuck out.â Richie threw his hands up, walking towards the man who still didnât move. Richieâs heart skipped, flashbacks of Mikey flooding into his vision, parallels of the two brothers blurring before him.Â
âYo, Carm, you-you good?â Richie stepped into the garage, his spine tingling with icy fear. It was quiet, an eerie, unsettling quiet. âCousin, hey, what-whatâs wrong?âÂ
Carmen's chest rose and fell, tighter and tighter. He was suffocating, head spinning and mind racing so fast he felt light headed. He could barely hear Richieâs voice over the noise in his head, Richieâs hand shaking his shoulder finally breaking his trance enough to meet his eyes, rounded in fear filled question.Â
âCarmen, whatâs wrong? Is it- Donât fuckinâ tell me itâs the baby. What the fuck is goinâ on-âÂ
â-She left.â Carmenâs voice shook, raspy and scared. His tongue still felt too thick, head still spinning. He wasnât even sure he said it, Richieâs widening eyes the only thing confirming that he had said it.Â
âWhat? Who-Who left? Who?â Richie looked around, like the clues might be there, sure that Carmen wasnât talking about you. No, he wouldnât- he couldnât. Not you.Â
Carmenâs breath hitched, a strangling of a sob caught in his throat, running his hand over his face. Richie didnât miss the way it trembled, shaking even as it rested over his eyes. Your car was gone, the house too quiet, no baby Teddy crying, nothing but silence was left.Â
Richieâs heartbeat crawled into a rapid, scared pace. âWhy? Wh-Why would she-â Richie looked at Carmen, eyes wide but still, reading his expression. âNo. No, Cousin, no. What-What did you do? Carmen,â Richie grabbed both his shoulders, shaking him lightly until he met his gaze. âWhat did you do?âÂ
Carmenâs face began to crack, behind his eyes, Richie could see flashbacks of something- something he didnât know what, but whatever it was, it was painful. That was evident by the fear that glossed over Carmenâs eyes, realization and horror. Carmenâs shoulders shook, frame rocking with a sob he tried to swallow, but couldnât. Deep cries, guttural sobs breaking out of his frame, heels of his hands pressed to his eyes, fingers curled and clenched around his greasy curls in agony.Â
The damning realization flooded over him, that youâd left.Â
Youâd left, youâd taken Teddy, taken Anchovy- youâd left because heâd driven you away. His angry outburst, petulant, mean, hurtful- heâd been so cruel to you. You. His wife, the love of his life, mother of his child, the one person who loved him endlessly without stipulations or boundaries, the one person who truly understood him.Â
And heâd driven you away.Â
He wished he could blame his mom, his dad, his family for fucking him up so severely, maybe Mikey, even, for leaving him the shit show that was the restaurant, making his anxieties worse and fuse shorter. But sitting in the empty garage, Richie standing above him in silent shock, his sobs and angry sniffles echoing off the cement floor, Carmen knew he had no one to blame but himself.Â
Heâd fucked up. Really fucked up. Fucked up in a way that made all the other times look obsolete.Â
Carmen had fucked up, and for once, he didnât know what to do. He couldnât avoid it, ignore it, deflect it like other times. Half hearted apologies and promises of change wouldnât work, you werenât here for him to even try to give them to you, and he didnât know where you went.Â
Carmen wasnât sure where you went, how to fix this, why heâd done what he did, and a million other things that raced through his mind. What he did know, sitting in the too quiet garage, chest stuttering with heaving cries, was that heâd do anything.Â
Anything, to get you back home. To make it right. To fix this and make it up to you.Â
He wasnât sure how, but heâd give up everything. Anything. His restaurant, his dreams, his hopes, his life, at this point, to make it up to you.Â
#thebearer#bearblahs#carmen berzatto#carmen berzatto x reader#the bear#carmy berzatto x reader#carmy berzatto#dad!carmen berzatto#dad!carmen berzatto x mom!reader#carmen berzatto angst#carmen berzatto x reader angst#dorothea âteddyâ berzatto#carmen 'carmy' berzatto#the bear fic#tina the bear#richie jerimovich#camren berzatto x female!reader#carmen berzatto x female!reader#carmen berzatto x pregnant reader#carmen berzatto x pregnant!reader#carmen berzatto x you#carmen berzatto x fem!reader angst#the bear angst#the bear fanfiction#the bear hulu#the bear fx#carmen berzatto fic#carmen berzatto fanfiction#natalie berzatto#sugar berzatto
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BAD IDEA RIGHT? BEST FRIEND'S DAD!TOJI for KINKTOBER 2023!
DESCRIPTION: you and megumi are old friends, but a recent development (called growing up) has made you aware of just how hot his dad, toji fushiguro, really is. you sit on your desire for years until one night, you get an idea.Â
PAIRING: best friendâs dad!fushiguro toji x reader
WC: 5.1k whoops!
WARNINGS: 18+ MINORDS DNI. fem reader, afab reader, age gap! power dynamics, slight daddy kink, degradation, spit (like a lot it's a Thing here), oral (m! receiving), unprotected relations, slapping, gaping, size difference/size kink, creampie, toji is Nasty and a pretty bad dude lolÂ
A/N: this is nasty and very descriptive iâm so sorry i really sinned here. anyway enjoy!
you and megumi have been friends since school. after all, it was inevitable that a friendship would form between the only two kids whose parents consistently forgot to pick them up after class.Â
nods of acknowledgment quickly developed into trading pokĂŠmon cards, sharing samanco waffles, cheating off each other during tests.Â
it was the most meaningful relationship you had in your life, the one other person who really got you and the situation you were in, and before you knew it, you two were being admitted to the same college, like youâd talked about all those years ago.Â
in the meantime, megumiâs dad had⌠mellowed out. from what you knew.Â
sure, he was still gone for weeks at a time, neglectful, irresponsible and womanizing, but one final falling out with their family seemed to have lifted a big weight off his shoulders, and he became more present in megumiâs life, less resentful. you knew he wasnât a good guy, but you also knew he was trying, in his own way.Â
besides that, you also couldnât help noticing other things about the man. you first started paying attention when you were in high school, always hanging out at megumiâs place to play video games or study.Â
toji would come home sometimes, smelling of smoke and sake, tonguing the scar on the side of his lip. plopping down on their shaggy sofa, legs spread wide, thick thighs straining the fabric of his pants. you would give megumi some excuse about getting something from the kitchen and just watch toji, lazily browsing channels with one hand inside his sweats.Â
it wasnât a big deal. but it never quite went away, your infatuation growing with your desperation the more the man hung around. you did everything you could to get his attention.Â
you wore the frilliest, shortest skirts, left dirty dishes on the sink, showed up too late at night drunk and stumbling âlooking for megumiâ, acting out so you could try to get some reaction out of toji. but he never seemed to give you a second thought, annoyance being the closest thing to an emotion on his face every time your eyes met.Â
but you were no quitter. you knew one day you would get what you deserved. maybe not today, but⌠eventually.
you approach the fushiguro householdâs front door, fishing out the extra key megumi had given you from your backpack pocket. you two had a study session today but heâd texted you telling you heâd be late and to just let yourself in, so thatâs what you do.Â
with a sigh, you set down your laptop on their coffee table and sit down on the couch, looking up at the ceiling. before you can finish getting comfortable, a tall, broad figure is looming over your face and you almost jump out of your skin.Â
âwhat the fâoh my god,â you laugh in embarrassment. âyou scared me, fushiguro-san.â
he doesnât react, his eyes boring into yours. âme? youâre the one breaking into my house.â
you roll your eyes, pulling your legs up below your body. âmegumi gave me a key. weâre supposed to study today, do you know whereââ
âheâs with that itadori kid. donât think heâs coming back tonight,â toji moves to sit down on the loveseat, turning the tv on. the old, boxy thing crackles to life, a boat race playing on the screen. toji adjusts his body in attention. âso you can fuck off back home.â
âum,â you start, but nothing else comes out of your mouth. you let your eyes wander all over his lax form, and you can faintly make out his abs below the raggedy shirt heâs wearing. it makes your stomach turn.Â
without taking his eyes off the screen, he addresses you again. âyou know where the door is.â
an idea starts to form in your head. a really, really bad, tempting idea.
you discreetly take off your sweatshirt, leaving you in just your undershirt, no bra. you hope toji can scent the whiff of perfume you exude when you move, scooting closer to the edge of the sofa.Â
ânah, i think iâll just study here. my parents are home today and theyâre too⌠yâknow.â
ânot my fuckinâ problem,â he picks at his teeth, spreading his legs wider. your desperation is growing with each second he spends not looking at you.Â
you lift up your bag, something clinking inside. it's a bold move, but it's now or never.
âi brought booze. we could just share some and then iâll go.â
that at least gets a reaction. the man snorts, finally glancing over at you from the corner of his eyes. you instinctively push your chest out, feeling eager.Â
âis that what you do with my son under my roof? get shitfaced in the house that i pay for?â
âwell i paid for the vodka so i donât see how thatâs any of your business,â you make a point to pull out the bottle from your bag, swinging it around.Â
tojiâs expression hardens, his jaw clenching. you know he doesnât like to be challenged, absolutely hates smart mouths. you should be in for a treat.Â
âwho the hell do you think youâre talking to, kid?â he stands up and snatches the bottle from you, turning it around in his â big, veiny, deliciously calloused â hand and laughing. âvanilla flavored? fuck, you really are a kid.â he says it like the realization excites him.Â
you can feel your face flush.
âare you gonna turn down free alcohol, toji?â itâs risky, dropping the honorific. you know he doesnât like it, can see it in his face, but he doesnât say anything.Â
instead, he unscrews the top with ease and takes a swig, grimacing at the taste. you watch as his throat works, adamâs apple bobbing.
his arms are huge, you canât imagine he was ever shaped like megumi is nowadays, slender and frail. toji is tall and broad and big, with a permanent 5 oâclock shadow on his defined features.Â
he grabs two whiskey glasses and sets them down on the coffee table â no coasters â, pouring some vodka in both of them. it was most definitely not your idea to do straight shots tonight with megumi, but you will not go through the humiliation of asking for a soda to mix it with.Â
youâre desperate to have toji view you as the adult you are, no longer megumiâs awkward middle school best friend. you know youâve grown up well; all you need is for toji to see it too.Â
you drink in silence for a bit, the only noises coming from toji being his disappointed grunts as the boats he bet on fall behind. you type away at your laptop, not really being able to focus with the heat rising within you.Â
he refills both your cups a couple more times, but makes no effort to talk.
you slowly but surely start to get antsy, your determination wavering and giving way to a funny feeling one can only experience by drinking with their best friendâs dad who theyâve wanted to fuck for like, ever.Â
so you bite the bullet and with the liquid courage flowing in your veins, you strike up conversation.Â
âyâknow, toji, iâve always wanted to ask,â his head lolls on his shoulder to look at you lazily and disinterested. âwhat happened to megumiâs mom? he doesnât talk about it.â
âyeah, well. me either,â toji replies. you take a deep breath.Â
âyouâre gone a lot. megumi is alone a lot.â
toji scoffs.
âthought that was what you were here for, hmm? megumiâs done well for himself,â he finally, probably for the first time in your life, gives you a proper look over, his eyes traveling all over your frame, tucked into the armrest of the couch. âscored himself a nice little bitch.â
you let out a strangled noise. youâre fighting laughter when you exclaim, âiâm sorry?! you think megumi and i have aâlike, a thing?â
toji just shrugs, stretching one leg out in front of him. âi figured. why else would you loiter around my house so much?â
oh, if he only knew.Â
âno, no. itâs never been like that. megumiâs not really my type.â toji hums inquisitively, and you take that as a sign to continue. âiâm into more⌠mature guys.â
toji eyes you knowingly, but seemingly amused.Â
âthat right?â you nod. âfuckinâ kid like you even know what to do with a man?â
you raise an eyebrow. youâre a sophomore in college, well into your twenties. he canât be serious. âsurely you know iâm not a kid anymore. surely you dââ
âsurely my ass,â he exclaims and oh, heâs a little terrifying like this. toji downs however much was left in his cup and turns to you, pointing with the hand holding his glass. âyouâre a full of shit, foul mouthed, rude brat. get the fuck out of my house, youâre pissing me off.â
youâre used to tojiâs outbursts, not because you know him well but because every time you see him, seldom as it is, he always loses his temper, sooner or later.Â
âi think,â you take another sip, feeling loose. âyour old ass wouldnât be able to handle sex. like, actual sex, not those rich hags you who just lay there for you and give you money in the end. if you had to put in any real work i bet your heart would give out you slimey piââ
you canât finish your sentence because you canât breathe, suddenly. your eyes widen, chest spasming as your oxygen gets cut off mid-sentence. toji has one of his huge palms covering your nose and mouth.
you look up at him with watery eyes but heâs not looking back, heâs chugging vodka straight from the bottle again.
he puffs his cheeks and moves his hand to cup your jaw, smirking around a mouthful of alcohol.Â
you catch your breath quickly, the hand that was clawing at his falling limply on your lap. toji holds your face, his grip unforgiving as he leans over you. his form is so, so much bigger than yours, towering over you completely, and all you can do is look up at him with a blank expression.Â
his thumb pries your mouth open with ease, the digit hooking behind your bottom teeth as tojiâs face gets closer and closer. on instinct, you close your eyes.Â
soon, hot, stinging liquid is pouring steadily into your mouth. toji swishes the rest of the vodka between his cheeks â on purpose, youâre sure â before spitting it directly on your tongue.
itâs disgusting, everything about it makes your stomach churn, but it also makes you squeeze your legs together, chest rising and falling rapidly as you swallow without having to be told to.Â
âya talk too fuckinâ much, brat,â he grumbles. ironically, youâre at a loss for words. âsomeone needs put you in your place already.â
âyou,â your voice cracks and nearly fails you, but youâre determined. it surprises him, that youâd have something to say. that youâre still game. you can see it in his face, in the way his hands come off of you. âi want you to.â
tojiâs expression is hard and unchanging. his fingers go back to your face, two of them slipping inside your lax lips.
your breath stutters as you inhale, instinctively sucking the digits and working your tongue around them.
toji grabs his cock through his pants pointedly.
âfuckinâ slut⌠that what you want?â you nod. he takes a step forward, knees hitting the couch. âis that why you walk around my house looking like a fucking whore?â
a whine dies in your throat at the sweet, sweet recognition.
he noticed.
he noticed and it bothered him and you really couldnât bring yourself to care that he was your best friendâs father right now because he was tenting his sweatpants and your mouth was watering at the sight.Â
âpleaseâŚâ you paw at his waistband, pulling on the drawstrings. toji laughs at your desperation, voice growing gruff.Â
he buries a hand in your hair, fingers closing around your locks tightly and making your eyes sting with tears. slowly, he pushes your face into his crotch, so close that you can feel it pulsing, can feel every ridge, can feel that heâs not wearing any underwear.
god, you can smell him, and it makes your head spin, your mouth huffing out hot breaths and wetting the front of his pants.Â
you hook your fingers in the back of his sweats and pull until theyâre down tight around his thighs. you have to maneuver the fabric over the head of his erection, earning a hiss from the man towering over you.
his dick springs up, slapping you in the face and leaving a smear of pre across the bridge of your nose. you think toji snorts at that but you canât be sure. youâre too mesmerized.
heâs so, so big, the skin darker and flushed, tight, heavy balls and the head, angry red, peeking out from the foreskin.
your throat goes dry at the thought of it inside of you, inside any of your holes, because you know itâll destroy you forever. and you want it.Â
toji doesnât have the appeal that most men his age do to most girls your age. he doesnât make you feel safe, he doesnât offer financial support, he doesnât care about your well-being, he doesnât have his shit together. and to make matters worse to you, heâs your best friendâs dad, who your best friend doesnât even like that much, whose presence has been totally indifferent to megumi for most of his life.Â
it makes you burn in shame to know youâre about to have a man 25 years your senior in your mouth.
you readjust your position on the couch so that youâre sitting on your knees, angling your face with his cock. itâs curved, pointing up, and you wonder how much of it heâs gonna wanna stuff down your throat. judging by the pure evil glinting in his eyes, itâs gonna be as much as possible.Â
you take a deep breath, steadying a hand around his length. itâs concerning that you can just barely close your fingers around him, but you put that thought aside to focus on pulling the skin down gently so you can wrap your lips around the tip.Â
toji sighs in relief, his grip in your hair tightening.
you begin to work your head up and down, licking the underside of his cock to gather up saliva.Â
âthaaatâs it, what a good little bitch. got a sweet little mouth on ya,â he whispers, hips thrusting slightly to work his cock further into your mouth. âyer gonna take all of it? or are ya all talk?â
you whine, gripping the base and sliding further down his length. heâs already hitting the back of your throat, making your eyes water and your stomach seize. you pick up the pace, twisting your wrist rhythmically as you suck him.Â
âdonât swallow,â he threatens, forcing his cock deeper into you, the head sliding into the opening of your throat. âlemme see how messy this slutty face can get.â
you choke audibly, eyes smarting with tears, makeup smudging. you look up at him with furrowed brows in a silent plea of mercy.Â
tojiâs having none of it.
he puts one foot down on the sofa, next to your legs, giving himself the leverage to start fully fucking your face now. he wraps both hands around your throat and thrusts his hips violently into your mouth, his thumbs pressing down to feel his length in your throat.Â
âahh, fuck,â he throws his head back, reveling in your desperate gurgles. you feel like a fucking ragdoll, like a fleshlight, unable to control the noises you make or how much dick you take. âtakinâ me so well. who taught you to squeeze your throat like that, huh? so fuckinâ slutty.âÂ
you sob around his cock, nose buried in his pubes. heâs impossibly hard, impossibly wet as thick strings of spit and pre hang from your lips, dripping down to his balls, falling to the floor.
toji keeps fucking your throat relentlessly, granting you mere seconds between thrusts to inhale a desperate breath that immediately starts to burn in your lungs.Â
heâs a fucking sight though, above you. chin tucked into his chest, veins bulging and biceps flexed, nostrils flared as he watches you devour him.Â
he pulls out suddenly, leaving you choking for air. tears stream down your face, spit bubbling out of your nostril. you look all wrong, like youâd been put back together by someone after being utterly demolished.
âopen your mouth,â toji orders. you obey and he grabs his cock, slapping the head against your tongue a few times. he slides his length in and out for a bit before he starts jerking himself off. âsuck my balls.âÂ
you take that moment to swallow down the saliva that had pooled between your teeth, tucking away the wet strands of hair that frame your face.
tojiâs lifting his cock towards his belly, fisting the head and flicking his wrist. he looks at you expectantly, and you understand itâs time to prove yourself once again.Â
you place a gente thumb right below his shaft, where his sack hangs. your tongue dips in between his balls, shyly at first, just slightly tracing the shape of them before you pop one into your mouth.Â
toji groans, the hand on his cock gaining speed. you squeeze your thighs together; youâre so wet that it makes you uncomfortable. you lean forward on your knees, steadying yourself with your palms planted firmly on his thighs.Â
youâre sucking his balls earnestly now , one then the other, then both at the same time, angling your head up and working your tongue up and down the wrinkled skin.
tojiâs loving it, maybe more than the blowjob, and it makes you feel like a toy all over again, in an even more humiliating way because now youâre not even allowed to touch his cock, heâs just getting to use your mouth anywhere he wants.Â
itâs so fucking hot that it makes you dizzy. you hollow your cheeks, giving his nutsack a good suck before gingerly lifting his balls. you sneak a glance up at toji, hoping to catch him by surprise when your tongue dips even lower, approaching some pretty controversial territory.Â
it works. his breath catches in his throat and his knee kicks out instinctively.
he grabs your hair immediately, pulling you away from him.Â
âfuck,â you look up at him smirking, lips smeared with saliva and snort. but you donât even care how debauched you look right now, as long as you can keep the upper hand. âyouâre a nasty little bitch, arenât ya?â
he leans down to kiss you deeply, messily, inhaling loudly through his nose. toji finishes stepping out of his sweatpants and pulls his shirt over his head, revealing what youâd been imagining for so many years.Â
you run your hands over his chest, his abs, down his hips, his v-line. heâs so fucking hot, got bulging muscles you didnât even know existed in the human body, and scars you canât even fathom the origin of.Â
he stares at you, looking bored. âget up.â
you do, legs shaking and prickling with pins and needles. now you can fully feel the scope of your arousal, how your panties stick to your core uncomfortably, how the wet tops of your thighs rub together.Â
toji sits down on the sofa and you waste no time getting on his lap, clawing at his chest and leaning in for another kiss. heâs unforgiving even like this, so much bigger than you, his hand on the back of your neck and his mouth on yours.Â
âarms up,â and when you comply, heâs pulling your tank top off. âgood girl.â
you shiver, instinctively wrapping an arm around yourself. toji tsks at that, easily taking both your wrists in one hand and pinning them behind your back. he grabs your tit with the other, popping as much of it as he can in his mouth.Â
you groan, fighting against his grip to get your hands on his hair, his shoulders, anywhere. toji relentlessly sucks on your nipple, nibbling and circling it with his tongue.
when he pulls off, he lands a swift slap across your boob, ripping a groan from you.Â
âsuch a good fuckinâ slut, look at that body.â
he slaps your ass, this time, tugging your shorts over your butt. you help him get it off of you and then, finally, youâre straddling tojiâs cock, no layers in between you two, just your dripping core on him.Â
you think, belatedly, condom, but then toji is pulling you in for another kiss and for all you know megumi could come home any minute and you wouldnât want to waste time like that. or so you tell yourself.Â
his hands guide your hips to grind over him, soft mewls coming out of you and being buried into the crook of his neck.Â
âpretty little girl, gonna ride me? hmm? gonna ride this old manâs cock?â you whine, nodding.
you press your front against his so you can lift your ass up and guide the tip into your entrance. you donât expect to be able to take it all, but at least like this you can control the pace and how much of it is going into you, the only thing keeping you from panicking at the sheer size of him.Â
the head of tojiâs cock doesnât slip inside so much as it pops inside, the ridge locking just past your opening.
itâs too big, and even though youâre soaking wet, itâs still a stretch. you both groan in unison and you realize, this is it. this is your fantasy, youâre fucking toji fushiguro, megumiâs dad, your best friendâs dad.Â
your legs tremble as you hold yourself up, too soon to sink down more on his cock. tojiâs playing with your nipples but you have a sneaking suspicion his patience isnât going to last much longer.Â
you give it a valiant effort to take more in and it feels like being ripped in two. you clench your jaw, a bead of sweat rolling down your temple.Â
âfuuuuck, so fuckinâ tight,â toji spreads your ass cheeks with both hands, rubbing the thin skin where you two are connected. he thrusts up, feeding your poor pussy more of his cock, and you let out a scream. âtake it, câmon.â
âunghhâcanât, toji, hang onââ
ââcourse ya can,â he fucks up into you again and you sob, nails raking down his chest. he hisses and slaps your ass in punishment. you realize you might really cry.
âi canât, itâs too big, too muchââ
âshhh,â in an uncharacteristic display of affection, toji kisses the furrow between your brows, snaking a thumb between you two to rub your clit.Â
you throw your head back, body torn between seeking more pleasure and running from the pain. you can hear how wet you are as toji fucks in and out of you, your plush walls hugging him so well, weeping around him.Â
he speeds up and you bury your face in his chest, moaning wantonly into his skin. toji lets out staccato grunts, working his cock further into you with each thrust.Â
âany scrubs your age givinâ it to you like this?â he breathes out, grabbing your ass hard and moving it up and down his length for you. you whine, drooling on him. âyeah, thatâs right. fuck, take it, thatâs a good girl.â
âahh, tojiââ
âthatâs not my name, whore,â he fists your hair and drags your head back until your eyes meet. âtry again.â
âfushiguro-sanââ that earns you a hard slap on your ass. you yelp â wrong answer.Â
âtoji-samaââ another slap, and this time he grips the reddening flesh viciously. you whine, squirming in his grip.Â
âlittle braindead cumslut,â he wipes a tear with his thumb. âwhoâs fucking this tight pussy right now? huh? tell me who's ruining this slutty cunt.â
âdâdaddy?âÂ
toji smiles, humming, his grip on you softening as he leans in for a kiss. ���thatâs right, sweetheart. show daddy how much you want it.â
itâs amusing to toji, you know it. he just wants to humiliate you because heâs aware of how badly youâve wanted this. but it does something to you, itâs serious to you, itâs so fucking depraved and sexy to you.Â
he lifts you up with ease and lays you back down on the couch. you feel so empty suddenly that it makes you want to cry, like toji has already carved a home inside of you for his cock that no one else will ever be able to fill.Â
he wastes no time getting on top of you, hooking a hand under your leg and lifting it up onto his shoulder. your eyes widen immediately, a protest dying in your tongue. this position⌠his cock⌠itâs, god, itâs gonna beâ
toji plunges in in one violent, perfunctory thrust. you let out a scream, your heel kicking toji square in the back as your body rises up from the couch. heâs all the way inside now.Â
you can feel him bruising your cervix, his balls, wet with a mixture of the two of you, slapping against your ass, his hip bones drilling into you.Â
âyouâre so deep,â you look at him with panic in your eyes, chest gone cold at the overwhelming pleasure. âyouâre so deep.â
toji laughs, pulling out to spit on his cock. he grabs your ankle and sets it on his shoulder. âyeah, baby, daddyâs all the way inside now. feels good, doesnât it?âÂ
âfuck. oh fuck,â you let out shaky breaths, allowing toji to lay more of his weight on top of you. your knee is by your head now and somehow in this position his cock seems to hit even deeper, to curve up exactly in the right spots that have you struggling to breathe. âyouâre gonna break me.âÂ
âtakinâ me so well. just a natural slut arenât ya,â heâs fucking you so fast now, wet, slapping sounds resounding across the whole house.Â
thereâs a thick creamy ring at the base of his cock, frothy and bubbly with how much youâve been gushing for him. toji presses a thumb against your clit and rubs tight little circles, making you squeeze against him like a vice.Â
he grunts, speeding up his movements.
âso sensitive, this cute little pussy. you a virgin?â he slaps it a few times, your wetness sticking to his fingers with every pat. âgonna cum soon, whore?â
you whine, nodding. you wrap both arms around tojiâs neck and pull him closer, open mouth awaiting expectantly.
toji grins, spitting onto your tongue before leaning in to suck it.Â
âtojâdaddy,â you moan against his mouth, âdaddy, iâm close.â
you donât recognize your own voice. itâs slutty, desperate, pitchy, juvenile. it's too far gone.
toji works your clit over and over again, fucking you harder than youâve ever been fucked. he splays a hand over your stomach, kneading the place where his cock is nestled inside of you and hitting a spot that makes you lose control of your body and words.Â
âah, ah, ah, oh god toji fuck daddy make me cum, please please can i cumââ
âoh, fuck,â his thrusts start to become erratic and you know heâs close too. you clench around him, one leg wrapping around his hips to make sure he stays inside until you're done. âcum on daddyâs cock, come on. make a mess, little girl.â
you throw your head back, burying it into the pillows as your entire body thrashes with your orgasm. you clamp around him so hard that you can't even tell where he ends and you begin.Â
toji takes no mercy on you, his messy cock plunging in and out of you fast.Â
âgonna fill up this pretty pussy, yeah?â you shake your head desperately, one hand punching his chest. he canât finish inside of you, right? but why do you want it so bad? âno no no, donât fuss now baby. you want daddyâs cum inside you, donât you? wanna give megumi a baby brother? fuck yeah i know you do fuckin' take it whore fuuuuck, fuck i'm comingââ
he thrusts once, twice, three more times, knocking all air out of your lungs and the most ridiculous moans out of your mouth before heâs spilling into you, locking your legs like a fucking pretzel and biting down your neck.Â
you can feel it pulsing, spurting inside of you. you can feel both your heartbeats in your abused cunt, both of your juices combined and oozing out of you.Â
once you catch your breath, toji pulls out of you languidly, with a yawn. you two made a fucking mess, a sticky puddle on the couch right below your ass.Â
toji eyes it disinterestedly, much like how heâs eyeing you right now. your sweaty, messy, fucked out self, nearly melting on the fushiguro householdâs sofa.Â
âah. are ya on the pill or what?â he asks, like he just now remembered. after a few seconds you nod, a little incredulous. âheh. good.â
you slowly sit up, reaching for your sweatshirt to at least cover yourself up. you sneak a hand down to your cunt, fingers sliding through the mess there to dip inside you.Â
fuck, youâre gaping. toji well and truly ruined your pussy. it makes you panic a little bit, but it also makes pride swell within your chest, knowing you took it, all of it.Â
toji finally addresses you.Â
âiâm gonna go take a shower,â he looks behind his shoulder, sighing. he points at you. âwe left the fuckinâ tv on. if this shit racks up my bills youâre gonna have to pay me back.â
you guffaw. âme? pay you how?â
he smirks.Â
âgot one more hole i havenât wrecked yet, dontâcha?â he flicks your forehead. you just sit there, incredulous, trembling legs, halfway to horny again. from the bathroom, toji calls out, âlet yourself out. oh, and leave the vodka.â
A/N: lmfao! i got nothin to say in my defense. reblogs r very much appreciated
#âŠ.toji#âŠ.kinktober#toji fushiguro smut#toji smut#toji x reader#toji fushiguro x reader#toji fushiguro x you#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk smut#jjk kinktober#âŠ.tw daddy kink#âŠ.tw age gap#toji zenin#toji reader smut#âŠ.petra.doc#toji fushiguro x female reader#toji x female reader
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pt 2 of steve "dies but doesn't stay dead" harrington and eddie "ferryman of the river styx" munson // 1.9k // pt 1 âĄ
â
november 1984
Eddie checks. Of course he checks. Asks around, eventually to his superiors to make sure he wasnât going to get in trouble for not collecting Steve. Itâs uncommon, they tell him, rare, even. But not unheard of. People die briefly and come back to life. Usually only the one time. The answer should be good enough. Should be. Isnât though. It frustrates Eddie to no end. Months of wondering and ruminating with the firm belief that he wonât get to see Harrington again anytime soon to ask.
He doesnât have to wait long.
This time Eddie is on the boat. Leaning over the edge, a hand dangling low to the black water, staring at the same patch of grass he first saw Steve sitting. In fairness, all souls appeared in that general area. But Eddie is fixated on the exact spot Steve had shown off his deep chest wounds. Itâs for this reason that Eddie jumps three feet into the air when Steve materialises in the same spot again less than a year later.
Sitting up with a rattling gasp and a look of fury on his bashed-in faceâagain?! Eddie briefly thinksâSteve yells, âFucking Hargrove!â
âChrist, Harrington!â Eddie shouts, hand over his chest despite the distinct lack of heartbeat. âCould give a guy a bit of warning.â
Steve looks around, eyes surrounded by more dark bruising taking a second to focus on Eddie, chest heaving as he calms down. âShit, sorry, man.â
They just look at each other for a few long moments, Eddie standing like a frightened cat on his still wobbling boat. He clears his throat to break the silence. âWho, uh. Whoâs Hargrove?â
Scoffing, Steve drags a hand down the side of his face, then winces as it passes over bruising. âDouchebag new guy.â He sighs, settling his forearms on his knees. âHis sister is friends with some kids I know. Was coming after them, so IâŚâ Trailing off, Steve gestures to his face.
âWhat? Offered yourself up as a human punching bag and got yourself killed? Again?â Eddie says, trying not to sound too judgemental.
âYeah, well,â Steve sighs. âI wasnât just gonna let him beat up a kid. Theyâve been through enough without some dickhead coming in and kicking the shit out of them.â
Eddie feels his brows pull together slightly as he sits back down on the bench of the boat, arms crossed over the edge. Itâs not like Harrington was the big bully of Hawkins High, but defender of local kids is⌠new. âSounds like a grade-A asshole.â
Steve snorts. âHe is.â
âKids were lucky to have you around as their⌠babysitter?â Eddie offers, cracking a grin.
Steve rolls his eyes, a small smile playing at the corners of his mouth. âSomething like that. Probably didnât need me at all. Stuck around long enough to see her drug him, so they should be fine.â
Humming appreciatively, a thought moves across Eddieâs mind, and he canât help himself. ââŚNo monsters this time?â
âHa, ha,â Steve rolls his eyes. âYeah, I know you donât believe me, but the monsters did actually come back, which is why I was with those little shits in the first place.â He sounds annoyed, but thereâs a fond look behind those bruised eyes. One that gives Eddie a little spark in his chest. âBut no, this death was just a regular guy.â
Itâs Eddieâs turn to snort. âThis death. So casual.â
A full grin breaks out on Steveâs face, contrasting heavily with the bruises and the blood under his nose. âWell, when itâs happened this many times, kinda hard not to view it as like. Just this thing that happens, yâknow?â
Eddie doesnât really know. Of everything heâs learnt about deathâthrough his own and through everyone heâs met sinceâthis thing Steve goes through is beyond him. Incomprehensible. He nods anyway.
âHow many times have you died, Harrington?â
âHmmâŚâ Steve looks up as he thinks for a moment. âThis would be⌠five? Or six?â He shrugs. âIâm not sure if it happened when I was a baby.â
He says it so casually, so matter-of-fact, Eddie almost wants to double-take. It sounds so truthful, he struggles to not believe him. Even though Eddie knows heâs not losing much by believing him, a small part of him still has doubts. And worries for his job. âYou gonna get in the boat this time?â
Steve snorts. âNot this time, buddy.â Something jolts in Eddieâs chest at the familiarity. âMaybe next time though.â
âNext time,â Eddie mutters under his breath, shaking his head. âYou anticipate dying again?â
âWell, no,â Steve chuckles. âBut based on how things have been⌠and apparently Iâm not too careful.â He gestures at his bruised up face, eyes bright with humour between the blues and purples and reds.
âThe monsters?â Eddie supplies, just teetering on the edge of sarcasm.
âMonsters, douchebag guys, car wrecks⌠you just never know.â
The casual tone in which Steve talks about his deaths still has Eddie reeling. Itâs been well over a year and Eddie is surrounded by death constantly, and he still struggles to think about his own. Tells himself heâd rather not dwell, which is true, but it also hurts. He shakes it off, shifting his focus to the bruised and beaten boy in front of him.
âOr⌠you could save yourself the trouble, and get in the boat now?â Eddie gestures down at his boat with a little hand flair. Heâs joking. Mostly. If Steve did have the chance to go back to the land of the living, Eddie didnât want to take that away from him. Not that he thought Steve was getting that chance. Not completely, anyway.
âWish I could, but I donât make the rules.â Steve grins at him, like theyâre sharing a secret. And they kind of were. Eddie wasnât sure how many people knew about Steveâs semi-regular dances with death.
âAnd since when have you ever been one to stick to the rules?â Eddie asks, propping his arm up and resting his chin on his palm. Looking at the boy on the grass. His hair is longer this time.
Steve laughs, head tilted back. âFair point. But if you want me on that boat, youâre gonna have to come over here and drag me onto it.â He raises a brow at Eddie in challenge.
Eddie rolls his eyes. âWish I could, but I donât make the rules.â He repeats Steveâs words back at him, mocking him.
âWell, well, well,â Steve says, tone playful. âLook whoâs being a stickler for rules now.â
âI know,â Eddie drags it out, struggling to hold back his smile. âCrazy, huh? Divine punishment for being born the son of a criminal, I guess.â Eddieâs gaze drops down to the black water beneath him.
Steve scoffs at him. âLike you never smoked pot or broke speeding laws in that van of yours.âÂ
Eyes widening before he can stop them, Eddieâs shocked Steve even knows about the van. Shocked that Steve knows anything about him at all. What world is he in where the king of Hawkins High knows about Eddie and his beat up old van? Even being in the grade below him, Steve had a popularity pull that was noticed by those in Eddieâs grade. Confusion and surprise subsiding, Eddie finds himself leaning forward even further.
âComing from you?â Eddie challenges back. âWe all know about the famous Harrington ragers, Mister Keg King.â
The title makes Steve roll his eyes. âNever saw you at one.â
It was true. Eddie hadnât attended any of the parties, for fear of his reputation making him a target. He drops his gaze again. âDidnât think Iâd be welcome there.â
Steve doesnât respond, and the silence grows between them. They havenât moved, but Eddie feels further away from him. Like the weird little familiarity theyâd developed was being forcefully shoved apart. Eddie doesnât look up to see Steveâs reaction. Doesnât want the pity.
âSo, you really canât get out of the boat?â Steve breaks the silence with a complete topic change.
âNope,â Eddie responds, popping the P. âSheâs my new baby, now that I donât have my van.â He pats the side of the boat with his free hand.
Steve shifts forward until heâs sitting as close as he can to the waterâs edge without getting wet. Close enough for Eddie to see the broken capillaries under his skin and the little green flecks in his eyes. He takes in the cuts on Steveâs jaw and forehead, the two black eyes, the blood under his nose. The way his knuckles are bruised and bloodied to match. Something in Eddie feels oddly⌠protective. Like he wants to jump in front of anything that might hurt this guy he doesnât even really know that well.
âChange your mind about getting in the boat?â Eddie asks, voice low, now that Steve is so close.
âNo,â Steve huffs a laugh. âBut you canât move, so I figured I should.â
âJust that desperate to be close to me, are you?â It slips out of Eddieâs mouth before he can think about it. And Eddie wants to punch himself in the face over it.
But to his surprise, Steve doesnât recoil away or yell at him. Instead, he laughs softly, cheeks faintly pink beneath the bruising. âWhat can I say? The allure of your⌠babyâŚâ He says it with a smirk. âVery tempting.â
Taken aback by Steveâs⌠flirting is the only word to describe it, but that canât be right, Eddie immediately switches to joke mode. He wonât entertain the idea that Steve Harrington was honest-to-god flirting with him. He wonât.
âIâll get you into this boat one day, Harrington. Mark my words.âÂ
He knocks on the edge of the boat twice before smoothing his hand over the wood. Watches as Steveâs eyes follow his hand, seemingly fixated on it. Eddie briefly wonders what would happen if he touched Steve. Would that commit Steve to being stuck here? Commit him to moving on? Would Eddie even be able to feel him?
Gaze shifting back to Eddieâs face, a smile grows on Steveâs face. âMaybe. One day.â He shrugs, like his eventual death is a fun, whimsical topic.
Eddie is about to comment on Steveâs tone, but before he can, Steveâs head whips to the side, hearing something Eddie canât. Just like last time.
Unlike last time, Steve doesnât get up right away. âLooks like my timeâs up.â
âHow do you know?â Eddie is so curious, he canât help but ask.
âI can hearââ Steve waves vaguely around his ear. ââstuff. From where I am. The kids are yelling. Hope theyâre not too freaked out.â
âGuess you better get back then,â Eddie says, trying to hide his disappointment.
âYep.â Steve pulls himself up into a standing position, now suddenly looking down at Eddie, who leans back on instinct, shifting back on the boat bench. âBut Iâll see you next time.â
âIâll be here.â Eddie gestures at the boat, palm up. Like he has anywhere else to go. âSee ya, Harrington. Stay away from monsters.â
âIâll try,â Steve laughs, walking backwards on the grass. Keeping his eyes on Eddie as he retreats.
âTry not to get that pretty face bashed in again,â Eddie calls after Steveâs already fading form, grinning wide.
Steve just laughs, the sound of it echoing even after his body disappears from Eddieâs sight.
#ohoho they're BACK my friends!!#i've been working on this between my EMBB fic for funsies#but yes there will be More of this too hehe#more of steve being a morbid little shit and more of eddie wondering what the fuck steve's life is#cira writes#steddie fic#steve harrington#eddie munson#steve x eddie#eddie x steve#stranger things fic#steddie
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summary: in which you drive jungkook mad but you make his heart beat.
idol!jungkook x f!reader, est. relationship / fluff, suggestive, a pinch of angst / word count: 5k
content/warnings: tried sumn different so this is mainly from jungkookâs pov :D !! drummer!oc ur so cool & iâm stealing u from ur bf đâ mention of a 10 yr age gap between jk & a guy who likes oc (heâs hella pissed off) ; mentions of (car) s^x ; allusion to a bl^wj^b ; jk just got home from tour & oc is tipsy, needy, & dramatic as hell T_T ; oc /briefly/ touches jk while heâs driving & he /nearly/ loses his shit & crashes the car (he doesnât) (iâm kidding) + to the anon who wanted to jkâs cheek scar to get a kissy here u go đĽş
> in which masterlist!
note: oc is so shot glass of tears coded especially in this⌠iâm glad iâm posting this after golden came out just so i could say it 𼰠this takes place after this drabble sooo the end of oct 2018 <3 if uâve read the prev drabble too, this was when jk said those exact words in the past 𼺠wrote this in the middle of hell week so i was half out of my mind :'] as always feedback & reblogs rrr always appreciated !! đĽş
â
jungkook loves the sound of rainâ the gentle knocks on every surface of the earth has always been a lullaby even during daylight.
tonight is a different story, however. it is defeaning, terrifying even. he can barely see what is infront of him, spare the occasional headlights blazing across the slippery roads. his umbrella is being stolen away by the harsh gusts of wind and the mud stains on his sneakers are well-hidden by the plain black.
and yes, he is tired; and yes, this is hard, but that is the end of it.
youâre exactly where you told him youâd wait, far behind the edge of the roof where the rainwater falls from and splashes on the ground. you stand out in his blue oversized shirt, one that he purposely left behind in your closet so he could have something else to wear when he sleeps over.
youâre too busy typing on your phone to see him crossing the parking lot; he feels his very own vibrate in the pocket of his sweatpants. however, his giddy smile fades when a man exits through the entrance door and approaches you with a red umbrella. his strides become slightly hurried then, as he watches you politely decline it with that heart-fluttering smile of yours everybody adores.
âoh no, really, iâm fine. you might need it later! my boyfriend is already coming to pick me up anyway.â
jungkook acts cool. he tucks his hand in the pocket of his sweatpants, tries to make himself appear bigger because he realizes that he would be inches shorter than the man if not for the platforms of his shoes.
â____, baby!â
upon hearing your name coming from the lips of your lover, your face lights up even brighter.
âjungkook!â
you greet him with an embrace, jumping into his arms before he can properly set down his umbrella on the ground.
âyah, yah-yah! be careful!â he chuckles as he wraps his arms around your waist to catch you, peering down to check how high your boots are for you to be running and jumping around freely.
âhey, iâm going back inside- thereâs more customers coming in. make it home safe, alright?â
the stranger tries to catch your attention, and jungkookâs protectiveness swiftly kicks in when he lays a hand on you and slides it down to your lower back. your boyfriend turns you away from the unprompted touch by pulling your body closer to his side, and he is unable to control how his eyebrows knit together in annoyance.
he wasnât planning on giving much thought to the presence of a man around you. he knows better than that. but he has never heard about this one, which raises the question of who the fuck is he to freely touch you like that?
âoh- alright! thank you, jun!â
âyou better take care of ____, man. itâs dangerous around here during this time.â
he receives a rather heavy and condescending pat on the shoulder, and so, with his annoyance bubbling worse, he wears a passive aggressive smile on his face.
âyeah, of course i am,â
junâs nostrils flare as he witnesses you sneakily slide your hands underneath jungkookâs hoodie in search of warmth.
âiâm here now, so thereâs no need to worry about my girlfriend anymore.â
he nods, then forces himself to smile. âthatâs good, then.â
âyeah, thanks. weâre leaving.â
âoh, okay. have a nice night!â
âyou too,â
he turns on his heel and returns inside the busy establishmentâ but not before jungkook made sure that he saw the bruises on his knuckles that he got from his boxing sessions.
his jaw clenches as he glares at the door.
is he being petty? sure, to hell with that. he doesnât care. heâs always been one to trust his gut, and he has a bad feeling.
he is met by a love-drunk smile when his undivided attention is at last given to you, in the form of fond eyes and affectionate strokes of your hair.
âwho was that?â
âeh, new bartender,â you shrug with disinterest. âhm, i think heâs 31âŚ? heâs nice but he keeps talking about wrestling.â
he raises an eyebrow at the mention of his age, while your lips form a sad pout.
what the hell? he thought he would be 25 at most.
âthe tv has been in the same channel for the past two weeks because of him. itâs all iâve been seeing! i donât like it-â you whine in distress, quite frankly, a little traumatized.
an endeared smile is coaxed out of him at your adorableness, how your speech is a little slurred and how youâre looking at him like youâre begging him to do something about it.
âmakes me nervous,â
his dominant hand closes into a fist.
if he only he had known. shouldâve fucking punched the guy, give him a taste of what he seems to be a huge fan of.
âletâs watch something calming when we get home, how about that?â
you nod your head, eyes that twinkle with eagerness fluttering shut when he leans in for a much awaited kiss. how sweet, he feels a little more alive than before. he can smell it, even taste itâ the peach margarita you started sipping on before the bandâs first set. concocted by jun, he presumes. he pulls away with a small smile, licking his lips for the traces of you that clung to him.
out of the blue, you burst into a fit of giggles, weak knees buckling as your weight crashes on him.
âi missed you!â
âbabe, are you seriously drunk?â he chuckles, holding you with a secure grip around your torso.
âmaaaybe tipsyâŚ? i was pretending not to be.â you stand on your tip-toes to nuzzle your face against his neck, mumbling sheepishly. âonly trust you.â
â
âi shouldâve accepted the umbrella.â you grunt childishly, body going limp on jungkookâs back, except for the arm holding up the umbrella that shields the both of you from the pouring rain.
âyah!â he scolds you, clearly not pleased with the words that just came from your mouth. âwhat does that mean?â
âiâm embarrassed! theyâre probably feeling bad for you.â
the last sentence comes out as a whisper, pertaining to the side glances youâve been attracting from strangers as you make your way to your boyfriendâs car.
unfortunately, he had to park somewhere far because the restobarâs parking lot was already full.
you jokingly complained about staining your white boots with dirt and mud, but you instantly regretted it when he bent down, signalling you to ride on his back without an ounce of hesitation.
âour shoulders always get wet when we share an umbrella,â he said. âif i carry you, wouldnât it be better?â
âembarrassing? some would even say romantic!â
something peculiar happens thenâ when your lips ghost over his left cheek, planting an affectionate kiss there that lasts for seconds. you pull away with a smacking sound, giggly and bubbly, might be his favorite version of you.
âi love you,â you hum, grasping the umbrella upright before it could tip over.
he doesnât know if you did it on purpose or not, kissing him precisely where his scar is, but his heart jumps in his chest when he feels it begin to throb.
as if the wound from his childhood has come alive. as if, once again, he is bleeding as he glares at his older brother, and he still wants to play games on the computer oblivious to the fact that it would leave a permanent scar, a brand new landmark on his body.
you mistake his silence for something else.
you frown, warm breath tickling his neck as you quietly ask. âare you still mad at me?â
he sighs, vision landing on the ground as his walking pace slows down. âno? i was wrong. i shouldnât have questioned your decision in the first place⌠why would i be mad?â
you started playing the drums for your friendâs band two months ago, just as soon as he left for tour. you volunteered after witnessing how distraught they were when their drummer vanished without a trace. he learned that it used to be a hobby of yours from childhood until early teenage years, playing the drums, but it was robbed from you when your father took his instruments with him when he abandoned your home for another.
he was pleasantly surprised when he learned about it, recounted all the times your hands and fingers were drumming on any sort of surface and his head naturally bopped to the beat, but then again, you never brought it up.
isnât ____ so cool? he would proudly say when he flaunts you to his friends, even the protocol team, who have never seen him so happy.
three times a week, from nine in the evening until midnight, your phone was propped up on an empty table infront of the stage, and him, on the other side of the globe, excitedly watched you from backstage while he was getting ready for their own show. some other times, he was in his hotel room, or the private jet. his patience has been tested by crappy wifi, nosy and noisy people, and his earphones that stopped working while you looked insanely attractive grooving to âwhyâd you only call me when youâre high?â as you effortlessly played the drums. he showered you with compliments as you did for him. youâre working hard so he must do the same.
he arrived home from tour the other day, spent the rest of its hours sleeping. yesterday, he waited for you at school and then at work like a lost puppy, slept on your bed (if heâs being honest, the two of you didnât do much sleeping) then woke up at 9am for work.
and he tried his best, he really did, to get out of the company early enough to catch you playing a song or two. after all, it was your last day at the job.
much as you enjoyed reconnecting with an old flameâ loved the overflowing tips that came from those who were amazed by your talent (well, there were also those who were just trying to get into your pants), the moment that the old drummer got down on his knees begging to be taken back by his best friends, just like how you became a part of the band, you voluntarily stepped down.
jungkook didnât agree with this decision. he didnât understand why youâd sacrifice something that makes you happy for a person who fucked up and wasted what they had. you went back and forth over it on the phone until you cried, told him that it wasnât easy for you, and he couldnât hold you in his arms or kiss your face. he could only apologize, and it even felt insincere doing it through a screen.
maybe heâs only relieved that you no longer need to be around a man an entire decade older than he is, who is obviously interested in you and serves you alcohol drinks. no, that doesnât sit right with him. he needs jun, or whatever the fuck his true name is, to stay very far away from his baby.
âiâm just sad that i never got to watch you perform in person.â
you rest your cheek on his shoulder, heavy eyelids slowly blinking as the headlights of a black van blindsides you.
what the fuck. too bright.
âme tooâŚâ
â
âiâm bored,â you release a dramatic sigh, stealing a glimpse of jungkook at the driverâs seat, just to see if you caught his attention like you intended.
his eyes are trained on the dashboard, however, focused on the navigation guide displayed on his phone. he isnât very familiar with this part of the city. it took him more than an hour to arrive at the address you sent him, including the time he spent in the middle of traffic.
âforty-eight minutes, then we can do whatever you want.â
âwhatever i want?â
he slows down the car, briefly turning his head to find you expectantly looking at him with wide, hopeful eyes.
âof course,â he laughs, taking one hand off the wheel to squish your cheeks together. âjust tell me what it is, baby.â
he doesnât catch the sad look that flashes across your face after you lose his touch.
âthen iâll tell you when i figure out what i want,â you say quietly.
âi thought you already had something in mind?â
ânope,â you answer with yet another sigh.
you choose to stare out the window in silence, body completely slumping into your seat in defeat.
jungkookâs senses are sharp, or he likes to believe so. âare you okay?â
âiâm okay,â
âyou sure?â
âhmm,â you hum curtly, and then you close your eyes, so he decides not to press further despite wanting to.
he meets a red traffic light not long after that. and so, he hurriedly grabs the black fleece blanket in the backseat. he envelopes you in it, crossing the distance between you to softly press his lips onto yours for a goodnight kiss. he feels you respond, albeit lazily, and he smirks cockily when you lift yourself up to chase him for one more, pleaseâ desperately, to get your fill of goodnight kisses from the many nights that you missed it.
the time seems to tick excruciatingly slow now that youâre quiet. a minute is multiplied by a hundred. the steady rhythm of your breathing keeps him sane throughout dark avenues and encounters with reckless drivers of the midnight scene.
he missed you. he missed you so much, and he knows that youâre tired from university, and tutoring high school students in english, and playing the drums for more than two hours⌠but he selfishly wishes that youâre awake right now so he can make up for the two months that you were apart.
be careful of what you wish for, they said.
jungkook should know better by now.
âi canât sleep,â he hears you whisper in a dulcet tone that indirectly tells him youâre in need of some love⌠but he isnât given the chance to act upon that request because youâre already all over what it is that you need.
he swallows thickly, glancing down at your hand that has somehow found its way to his inner thighâ zeroing in on your red nails, can feel them faintly grazing his skin.
youâre so pretty. everywhere.
even when naked and bare.
no, especially. itâs all he can think about.
he can draw you from memory.
â____,â he utters your name through gritted teeth, heart beginning to race a thousand miles per second in his chest.
the effect of your teasing touch is instantaneous, slowly inching closer and closer to where his growing erection is. his eyes remain focused on the road, but he fears that heâll start thinking with his dick soon if you carry on with this act a few seconds longer.
âshit, not now, baby- please- not while iâm driving.â
your bottom lip is caught between your teeth, poorly concealing a self-satisfied smirk, and you pretend not to hear a single word from his plea.
a minx, thatâs what you are, always causing trouble and blurring lines in his eyes.
â____, iâm not joking around. donât make me mad-â
his warning is cut short by-
âfuck⌠fuck,â he curses, filter flying out the window once he feels you tracing the outline of his hard-on, the feather-light touch of your fingers smoothly gliding across the fabric of his sweatpants, and he completely loses it when your soft palm caresses his cock, so gentle that it feels almost innocent.
okay, so he couldnât feel it because you werenât skin-to-skin, but he knows that your hands are soft, can feel his imagination running wilder because he has memorized the way they feel on most parts of his body.
youâre so incredibly nasty and evil for thisâ squeezing him lightly, taking advantage of how sensitive heâs gotten, making him tremble as pleasure shoots up his spine. his breath stutters in his lungs and he unconsciously pushes harder on the gas.
and although it means fighting every fiber of his being that painfully yearns for more, he seizes your wrist in an iron grip, placing your hand over the gearstick while his sits heavy on top of yours.
â____! behave! youâre going to get us killed!â
he watches you jut out your bottom lip through the rearview mirror, eyes hazy with lust staring down at where your hand used to be, and then his handsome face. he is evidently flushed, honey skin dusted with a rosy pink. all the way to the tips of his ears, down to his neck.
while heâs driving? really?
doesnât this only happen in wet dreams?
you are not real.
âthen pull over,â you plead. âplease?â
he releases a shaky breath. youâre always so needy with alcohol in your system, drove him into total insanity while he couldnât be here to give you what you wanted.
âno, you need to learn how to be patient⌠told you we can do whatever you want when we get home, right?â
wrong move.
the silence returns, and just when he thought that you went back to your journey to slumber, the sound of your sniffles fill the car.
jungkookâs heart breaks into a million pieces.
also, he wants to slam his head against the steering wheel.
you make it so fucking hard to resist you; you always get what you want. it becomes much harder when he is the subject of your desire and he loves being loved.
âhavenât i been patient enoughâŚ? i missed you so much.â
âand i missed you too!â he brings your intertwined hands to his lips, pressing them on your skin. âfuck, you have no idea how much⌠please, donât cry.â
âthen pull over,â you stubbornly insist, and he is so close to driving this car into a lamp post. âfuck me at the backseat.â
âcanât,â he mumbles, sounding almost pained, and he is. he wants you so bad, it hurts. âweâre going to have to do it without protection.â
âwhat do you mean?â you exclaim.
you rip your hand away from his, not wasting time in unlocking the glove compartment, and a sound of sheer disappointment escapes from your mouth as you collapse back on your seat.
âjungkook, i hate you!â
âwell right now i hate myself too!â he cries out in frustration. âi didnât have the time to buy more, okay?â
âand thereâs not one in your wallet?â
âbabe, are you serious?!â
âwhat?!â
somehow, his hands still expertly swivels the steering wheel as the car meets a curve.
but he feels dizzy. the ghost of your touch is still there, a promise of carnal pleasure unfulfilled.
âstop the car,â you say out of the blue, rather calmly, and that terrifies the shit out of him.
he swallows the lump in his throat, eyes switching between you and the road in panic. âhuh?â
âi said stop the car, iâm stepping out.â
âbabe, come on,â he moans, ruined and tormented. he reaches for your hand but you scoot further away from him, and he ignores the way his heart drops to his stomach as he kneads your exposed thigh instead. âplease, donât be like this. i just got home.â
âjungkook! if you donât let me get off this car right now, i swear!â
the urgency embedded in your threatening voice leaves your boyfriend with no choice but to pull over to the side of the street as soon as he gets the chance.
he carries on to unbuckle his seatbelt.
âbaby, stop being stu-â
he tries to reach for you, but he is rudely ignored as you hop off the car and slam the door shut on his face.
ââŚbbornâŚâ
he blinks.
he inhales. he exhales.
and then he buries his face in his hands to scream⌠as quietly as possible.
âwhat the fuck was in that margarita?!â
â
jungkook steps out of the car worried sick about you. now wearing a black bucket hat, his head whips in different directions in search for the familiar shape of your body, your hair, your shirt that is his, anything.
his arm rests on top of the car door, the other on the roof, fingers drumming on it anxiously as he chews on his bottom lip.
there are mostly restaurants here, it seems. some are already closed, some are still lights on. not far away, he hears a karaoke place bursting with music and laughter. he looks up and he finds that the night sky remains barren of stars; thereâs no guidance from the heavens that will lead him to you.
except for the sound of your sweet voice calling out his name.
he turns around, and he knows itâs going to sound extremely silly, but damn, you make his life feel like a movieâ because youâre jogging towards him, and the universe begins moving in slow motion. perhaps it is to prevent him from falling on his knees in relief, because he genuinely thought that you already went home on your own like the stubborn brat that you are.
â____, where did you go?! you canât just run off like that! seriously, that was not nice!â
âi forgot my wallet!â you squeal as you halt infront of him, slapping your forehead as a way to scold yourself. âi found a hotteok cart!â
his anger quickly dissipitates. he scans your face, mouth agape in bewilderment.
you, screaming at him to stop the car because there was a sighting of your favorite snack? makes sense.
he dishes out the wallet from his pocket. âwha- i thought you⌠you didnât have money?â
you shake your head to answer his question.
âthen how are you already eating?â
you take another bite from the hot hotteok youâre holding in a paper cup, and then you shrug.
âi was already eating when i realized it,â you point at yourself, a mischievous smile tugging at the corners of your lips. âso he let me run back here. does it look like this face would steal?â
âyouâre impossible!â he bursts out laughing, the unique sound of his joy harmonizing with the mundane noises of the city.
he is thoroughly amused and in awe of your undeniable charm never failing to work its magic. if you just gave it a shot, you might be even better at him at his job.
youâre pliant as he captures your wrist, tugging you away with him so he can lock the car.
âi bought three, by the way.â you note as the two of you start walking, with you clinging to his side. âthe last three then mister can go home.â
you put the hotteok near his mouth, and he pauses to take a big bite. âhave you even had dinner?â
âjust the four margaritas- they were yummy! or was it five?â
he clicks his tongue in disappointment, but he doesnât get to say anything more about it because youâve reached the hotteok cart, and heâs already handing the vendor the money.
âthank you!â he bows his head politely as he accepts the remaining two you mentioned earlier, handing them over to you.
âno, this is yours.â you speak with tenderness, giving back one of the cups to him. âthen weâll split the third one. itâs really good!â
the vendor secretly watches the interaction with a fond smile as he packs up to finally, finally end his long day working at the busy streets of seoul.
â
youâre sat together on the hood of jungkookâs car as you share a midnight snack. with caring hands, you rip the hotteok apart in perfect halves, offering the other to your lover. he accepts it in between his teeth.
âdo you want drums as your christmas gift?â
âlove,â you search for the words to say as you chew the food in your mouth. âi can barely fit in my apartment. where am i going to put a drum setâŚ? not to mention that i canât even cry without my neighbor hearing it.â
his shoulders drop in dejection, and you rub your boyfriendâs back in an attempt to comfort him.
âyou must really want to see me play, donât you?â
âiâm dying to,â he says in pure jungkook fashion, tone dramatic and thick with an accent that is entirely his. âi canât believe there were regulars who saw you every night, while i, your boyfriend, didnât even see you onceâŚ! even that fucking bartender⌠this- this canât be right! do you think this makes sense? no, right?â
âaw, my baby,â you coo at him, jutting out your bottom lip as you tenderly cup his face.
âi donât trust him, by the way,â he scoffs. âas much as possible, stay away from him when you visit, alrightâŚ? if i see him touching you one more time, i donât know what iâll end up doing to him.â
âi donât like him either,â you giggle. âso thatâs easy.â
he stares at your bloodshot eyes. damn it, you havenât sobered up.
â____, iâm serious. heâs weird. iâm worried about you but i canât always be here to protect you.â
you blink at him innocently. âi am too! serious!â
âyou promise me?â
âi promise!â
he nods, teeth sinking into his bottom lip as he gets lost in the sea of his own thoughts. âi should talk to your friends about this, too. is that okay?â
âif that will ease your mind,â you half-smile, heart fluttering in your chest because you feel so cherished.
comfortable silence follows suit.
the hotteok is still soft and warm and sweet. if your love had to be delivered to his doorstep, it would in the form of your favorite food.
he sighs to gain more of your sympathy, basking in the attention heâs receiving from you. he missed this. he missed you. he sounds like a broken record, but itâs true.
âcome ooon, donât be sad! iâll make it up to you! but itâs a surprise!â
âsurprise?â he eyes you with suspicion. âwhat surprise?â
âjust trust me, alright?â
you poke his cheek where his dimples are, and you witness them pop out as he copies your contagious smile.
âcan i make a guess?â
ânope!â
you fit the remaining piece of your hotteok in your mouth, jumping off the hood of the car. you stand before him as you wipe your hands clean with a small paper napkin.
âdonât you dare. if you guess it right then my plans will be ruined!â
â
youâre back on the passenger seat to travel the remaining twenty-seven minutes to your apartment.
jungkook melts into the tenderness of your touch as he drives. youâre tracing the toned muscles of his arms; stroking his hair, his face, and the smell of the sticky brown sugar from the hotteok still lingers on your skin.
âwhen are you going to start getting tattoos?â you wonder out loud as he intertwines your fingers together on top of his thigh. âi think youâd look so pretty.â
âiâm planning on it.â
his heart skips a beat at the thought of you remembering that he wants his skin artfully inked as you absentmindedly distracted yourself with it.
he licks his lips, smiling as he looks over at you. âyou really think so? pretty?â
âhm, hot, too,â you stick your tongue out playfully, and he snorts out a laugh. âbut as long as youâre happy, then nothing else matters.â
âof course- wait, yah! you still need to eat dinner.â he reminds you once he recognizes the path youâre taking.
a grocery store is not more than a kilometer away, if his memory serves him right.
âwhat do you want? i donât mind cooking.â
âfor you to fuck me, thatâs what i want. you wonât mind that, too?â
oh my fucking god.
he wishes you were passed out drunk instead so he wouldnât have to suffer this battle between self-control and his insatiable appetite for you.
âbaby, arenât you still sore from this morning?â
âa little,â he notices you squeezing your thighs together from his peripheral, and along with it, the bruises on your knees from when you worshipped his body last night. âbut i want you.â
your giggles in reaction to him frustratedly running his fingers through his hair seems to only fuel the dirty thoughts in his head. he uncomfortably shifts in his seat to adjust himself.
âcan you just bring it up when we get near your house? youâre killing me over here!â
âbut why? iâm having fun.â you bring your tangled hands over to your side, peppering the back of his hand with innocent kisses. âi love you. youâre so cute.â
âare you⌠are you seriously calling me cute after what you just asked me to fuck you?â
his disbelief is challenged by your amusement.
âwhy not? being one dimensional? boring. being different things all at once? sexy.â
jungkook doesnât need to see you play the drums to know that you are the only one capable of making his heart beat like this. to feel it pounding, it turns out thereâs another way besides performing, he can just be alone with you. a different type of addictive exhilaration. he isnât at the top of the world; he free falls as it revolves around you.
you always know the right words to say, because right now, he is preening. heâs wearing a big smile, the kind that looks like heâs laughing, but heâs notâ almost. the kind that reaches his eyes, shapes them into little crescent moons.
how did he get so lucky?
rehearsals in the morning be damned, he will be fucking you good all night.
you make a noise of confusion when the car swerves into the trees at the side of the road.
âwhat are we doing here?â
jungkook only spares you a glance. âget in the backseat, baby.â
â
taglist in the reblogs! send an ask/dm if you want to be added (or removed) :D
â
#jungkook#jungkook fluff#jungkook angst#jungkook smut#jungkook drabble#jungkook one shot#jungkook scenario#jungkook imagine#jungkook fic#jungkook fanfic#jungkook x reader#jungkook x you#bts fluff#bts reaction#bts imagine#bts fanfic
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Hello!!! How are you?đŤśđťâ¨
First of all, I love your writing, you have a marvellous mind. Pls keep doing what you're doing, it's chef kiss đ¤đťđŠˇ
Secondly, I would like to make an order I can share and enjoy with Lando đ Can we have a carrot cake, a chocolate chip cookie and a custard tart with a mocha coffee and a double espresso shot?
We know the mix is a bit too much but we trust you. Thank you very much in advance. Xx âĽď¸
the bakery menu
feel free to order your own treats! as for this order i am happy to serve up something sweet! i really hope you like this, i am proud of it! i'm also surprised of the amount of lando norris everyone wants!
carrot cake ("swallow it. all of it.") + chocolate chip cookie ("you're beautiful when you smile, but you're the prettiest when my cock is in your throat") + custard tarts ("i've never done this before.") + mocha coffee (breeding kink) + espresso shot (dirty talking) served by lando norris (formula one)!
cw: smut/pwp, breeding kink, oral sex (femme receiving), dirty talk, engineer!reader, driver!lando, virgin!reader, oral sex (lando receives),
lando loved you. he really did, not only were you his favourite engineer, you were also his girlfriend. lando didn't want to mess it all up and going too fast. but after almost five months of dating, you two had never had sex.
not that lando really minded, he wasn't some horny dog who needed his dick wet all the time. he wanted to cherish and love you. but sometimes, he'd let his mind wander at thoughts of you.
a particular one that bounced around in his mind, a personal favourite was the one where he bred you. that was for when you weren't with the team at races, and it was just lando and his fist.
thoughts of you in his arms, his cock bullied into your sweet pussy. his filthy words in your ear. sweet promises that he was going to breed you nice and well. and anytime you tried to mention your career, he'd just kiss you quiet. promising that you could still be an engineer with a couple of norris kids.
the thought of that made his cock ache every time he thought about it. belly full of life that the could snuggle after a race, taking your kids to the park. being a proper family. it always sent him over the edge and left a huge mess in his boxers.
but before he could make sure you were all full of his cum, he'd needed to have his first time with you. it wouldn't be fair to get you pregnant on your first time!
it was the off-season and you were back home. you two didn't live together, but you were over often. often scolding your boyfriend for misuse of the oven or something else that would be considered silly. he'd just smile and smooth the lines in your face with kisses.
the break between seasons felt like the perfect chance to finally get intimate with you. there was no jet-lag or running around. there was no sleepless nights and high anxiety days. you two could rest and get familiar with one another.
he was watching you check the pasta in the pot to see if it was fully cooked yet. he licked his lips and crossed his arms before he asked, "love, do you even think about us getting.. closer?"
you looked over and chuckled, "lando, i think it's a little too soon for us to live together."
lando scratched the back of his neck and replied, "no, no.. not yet. i mean, if you're comfortable. maybe we could try... having sex?" he felt his blood pressure jump.
you put the wooden spoon down on the counter and looked to your boyfriend. your mouth was in an 'o' shape for a moment before you said, "oh! sex!"
lando laughed, "you forgot about sex? i mean... did you ever think about sex.. sex with us?" he knew you weren't asexual or something akin to it, he knew that you masturbated and what not. you just never were in a situation where you would've had sex. and lando didn't want to shove it onto you.
your face went hot, "i mean... of course! i was just worried about having sex during the season!" you scratched your neck nervously, "i was worried that you'd pull something and your performance on the track would be worse. or that a change in the routine before and after races would ruin your chances of a good season."
lando laughed, "oh my god, love. come here." he got closer to you and wrapped his arms around you. then kissed you on the top of your head.
you looked at him, "i'm sorry. i didn't realize! but yes! i would love to have sex with you! but it might take a while. i've never even given a blow job."
lando kissed you once more, "how about after dinner, we start with that? we have a few months to get a little.. closer."
you nodded eagerly, "of course! i'd love to!" you heard the water boil over out of the pot and onto the stove. you got out of your lover's arms to check on the food.
lando felt excited. how could he not. he was getting a chance to feel intimate with his lovely girlfriend. the excitement that coursed through him even made your lovely dinner taste better!
-
"is there anything you want to try before we start. anything i can do to make this more comfortable." he asked as he looked down at you. you were seated on the bed. you feet didn't touch the floor of the bedroom. it was cute.
you swallowed, "um... i, uh. well." you looked away, your cheeks burned.
lando cupped your face and looked down at you, "nothing is gonna scare me, honey." he smiled at you, "tell me."
you said, your gaze met with him, "i.. i like dirty talk. anytime i've read it somewhere in like a story.. i found it very hot. and i know you're... mouthy." you chuckled a little to make a joke.
"well then." he said, "i'll keep that in mind."
you said a little nervously, "i'm a little nervous, i've never done this before." you felt a thrill of excitement through your body as you watched lando let go of you and pull his cock out of his shorts.
"don't worry, love." he said, "i'll make sure you feel good as well."
you pressed your cheek against his abdomen, letting him take control. the sight of his cock stirred something in you. a need for you to do your best and make your boyfriend feel good. even if you didn't have the skills, you were eager to learn.
and who would be a better teacher than your loving boyfriend. you closed your eyes and let lando guide your head onto his cock. you kissed his length before you softly took it in your mouth.
lando hissed through his teeth, but when you looked at him nervously he gave you a thumbs up, "don't worry. all good."
you took more in your mouth and started on a steady pace. you felt your heart hammer in your chest. you really had never done this before but you didn't want the excitement to cause you to mess up.
"that's it. that's a good girl." he groaned, the praise made you rub your thighs together. you were just so adorable. he couldn't wait to explore every inch of your sweet body.
he had all of the off-season to make love to you. and if he was lucky maybe his breeding kink could show a bit of himself. that made his cock twitch in your mouth.
your eyes were closed and your hands were on his hips to steady yourself as you orally pleasured him. you weren't terrible, at least in lando's opinion.
"are you sure this is your first time doing this?" he asked softly. you looked up at him once more, eyes gleaming. you nodded and little and lando laughed, "hmm, i don't know. you're really good at this." the praise made your core throb and lando noticed. he held onto your hair a little tighter and moved you a little further down his cock, "don't worry, love. it doesn't bite." and laughed. his cheeks were pink from the rush in his body.
you whimpered as you continued. you kept an ear open for all the noises that lando was making. from his heavy breathing to the shudder through his body. you trusted him that if you were doing something wrong, he'd tell you.
"you're beautiful when you smile, but you're the prettiest when my cock is in your throat" he cooed at you, "i wonder what the rest of the team would feel if they saw you like this. i know some of them have thought about you, get a few drinks in 'em and they're talking about how they want to be the one to ruin your virginity." he laughed, "but i know i'll be the one to ruin them for you. you'll only want my cock."
you whimpered, your pussy was slick. this was hottest thing you've ever thought could happen. yeah, you've read erotic fiction and gotten a bit flustered. but this was something else. this sent a shock through you as you continued to pleasure him.
orgasm felt sharp in his mind. he softly guided you as the dirty talk tumbled out of his mouth. "i wonder if i could make you choke next time." he panted, "i wonder how good you could take me. i want all of you, love. i want to see all the ways i could make you cum. i want it all, and we got all of the off-season to see what makes you tick."
you whimpered.
"my pretty girl." he purred, it made your heart leap.
"lando." you said with a glaze in your eyes. your voice was muffled by the cock in your mouth and it was so painfully cute but also erotic that it sent lando over the edge.
his pretty girl, his little engineer with his cock stuffed in your throat. it couldn't get better than that. the words tumbled out of his mouth, "swallow it. all of it." and the look you gave made him easily cum down your throat. he almost got hard for a second time when he saw how dutifully you swallowed it all down.
"holy shit." he panted.
as you laid back on the bed to catch your breath. you knew the night wasn't over because lando was soon between your legs with your calves over his shoulders. it was only fair that he returned the favour.
after all, he learned something very important about his girlfriend. she was easy to get wet. <3
#bunny writes#the bakery#lando norris smut#lando norris x reader#lando smut#lando x reader#lando norris#ln4 smut#ln4#ln4 x reader#formula 1 smut#formula one smut#formula 1 fanfic#formula one fanfiction#formula one imagine#formula 1#formula one#f1 smut#f1 fanfic
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HOW THEY FUCK YOU || BLUE LOCK
w/ isagi, chigiri, bachira, rin and sae :D reo, nagi and kunigami version here <3
Isagi Yoichi fucks you with ultimate passion. He loves to see his best and beautiful girl bouncing up and down each time he forces his hard cock inside of yourâ no, his perfect pussy. With his forearms resting beside your head, he'll murmur sweet nothings into your open mouth as he shakes his head so that your noses touch a few times. "Let it all go..." he'll grant you a long, fiery kiss when you're about to cum just to hear and watch you gasp for air as he thumbs your pulsing clit, "you're so gorgeous when you cum on my cock, such a pretty girl". Most of the time, Isagi won't let himself cum until you're incapable of moaning anything but his name and his name only.
"C'mon baby, moan my name. Hell, fuckin' scream it if you want to. F-Fuck!" he'll pry it out of you, he always does. It's not like you can help it when he's making you feel so good, its the only name you'll ever be thinking of no matter what situation you're in.
Chigiri Hyoma fucks you with unrivalled speed. He never fails to leave you unable to form a coherent sentence, your brain turning to mush throughout your fuck sessions every single time. "Hngh, what a view," he'll moan and kiss one of your calves laid upon his shoulders whilst drilling into your sopping cunt, having your asscheeks propped up on his knees so his arms can wrap around your limp thighs. Whenever you're trying to speak, Chigiri will change pace to fuck you faster. He can't get enough of your futile attempts at speaking, revelling in the cute, long-winded whimpers that jump along with his thrusts.
"Fuuuuck... a-almost too fast for this pretty pussy to handle..." he'll stutter, leaning his warm forehead into your raised leg before the soft walls gripping at his dick begin to constrict again, opening his clenched eyes to witness you cum without warning. "One more time, atta girl. Don't pass out on me, dumbass."
Bachira Meguru fucks you with eager fascination. There's no such thing as a boring sex life with him around. Your noises and expressions are what he thrives off of, so you can forget trying to keep anything from him as he will, without a doubt, succeed in getting the reaction he wants from you. He loves getting you all embarrassed with his unpredictable antics, like the times when he'll land a swift slap upon your swollen clit right after caressing you so gently. "Mmph!" he'll bite his lip playfully at the sharp impact and grin sinfully at your bowed brows, "my, myyyy~ you liked that, didn't you?".
Bachira will treat sex like a damn guessing game, you don't understand why though, seeing as he knows you like the back of his hand. Maybe it's to show you how amazing he is in bed without sounding so egotistical. "Are you going to cum? No? A-Agh, how about now? Just kidding. Cum all over me..." he'll joke whilst relentlessly slamming his hips against your ass, observing your body jolt uncontrollably in his lap. "That's it, that's my slutty little monster."
Itoshi Rin fucks you with intense craving. He's utterly obsessed with you. You're the one segment of his life that big brother Sae cannot touch, and he likes to keep it that way. He'll never get over the sensation of security your tight, wet pussy brings forth, his loud sighs and possessive gripping at your thighs giving him away every time. Everything about your existence stokes a desire within him, making him crave that particular, heart-melting expression that Sae could never achieve. "Huh, huh..." he'll pant into your neck whilst ruthlessly humping you against the wall, "only I can make you feel like this, only me...". He'll have your entire body quivering, convulsing under his expert touch in seconds, and its when you do reach your high that he pays more attention than he would during a fucking soccer match.
Rin would rather die than not be able to see you cum for him. For him to be content, he has to etch the memory into his brain. "Good girl, good girl," he'll lovingly caress your contorting face and angle his hips perfectly, "I want you to cum s-so hard for me, so hard for me that you forget your own name." Sometimes the rewarding sight ends up being too much for his poor heart to take in, ropes of white releasing inside of you unexpectedly.
Itoshi Sae fucks you with utmost confidence. He knows damn well that nobody can have the control that he has over you. You'd do anything for him. "Now, bend over and fucking take it for me." he'll demand whilst tapping his bare cock upon your asscheek, not a single worry about your obedience faltering because... its him, of course you'll obey. When he fucks you from behind, he loves to gently grab you by the neck and pull your back into his chest. He'll praise you for your best behaviour, heavy balls thumping against your clit with his brutal thrusting. "Like a fucking champion..." with a hand brushing stray hairs away from your heated face.
Out of all the trophies he's racked up over the past, you're by far his most treasured. Sae is reminded of this once he sees your plumped lips open in a silent scream, spongy walls vice-like around his length as your release hits you like a brick. "There you go, cream on my fat cock." he'll groan into your sensitive ear, the hand around your neck coiling tighter like a deadly constricter snake.
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#blue lock smut#blue lock#isagi yoichi#isagi smut#bachira meguru#bachira smut#rin itoshi#itoshi rin#bllk smut#chigiri smut#chigiri hyoma#itoshi sae#itoshi sae smut
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video star
summary: the time when Olivia appeared in a blind, deaf, mute baking video with the triplets and Matt couldn't keep his hands to himself.
warnings: touchiness in front of people/on camera, suggestive language, suggestive content, use of pet names.
a/n: the song doesn't have any significance, it just plays in o.c.'s headphones.
"Hey guys, welcome back to another Wednesday video," Nick blurted at the camera posed several feet in front of them, "Today we're doing another Deaf, Blind, Mute Baking Challenge."
"However," Chris butted in, sticking a mocking finger in the air, "We have a special guest for today's video," He drawled out and looked off to the side where I was standing. Matt was still leaning back against the counter and smiled at me.
"Come on out, sweetheart." Matt beckoned me over with a flick of his fingers and a nod of his head. I jumped into frame and smiled at the camera.
"Hi guys!" I waved enthusiastically and placed my hands on the counter in front of me.
"For those of you who don't know, Olivia is our best friend in the whole world and Matt's girlfriend. If you didn't know that, you've obviously never watched a video because she's in all of our vlogs and we never shut up about her." Nick summed up the basics for the viewers at home.
I've been friends with the triplets since my freshman year of high school. Chris and I instantly clicked one day in Math when our more extroverted personalities found their ways to one another. He introduced me to his two triplet brothers at lunch that same day, and the rest was history. We became inseparable and spent every second of every day together since. Things became interesting with Matt and me as we got older and grew into ourselves but we officially started dating after we graduated high school. We were always scared to announce our relationship to his fans because they can be volatile to their female friends, but once we did and they accepted that we loved each other, we've been so open and comfortable expressing that love physically on camera.
"So, how this is gonna work is..we're gonna draw out of a hat and three people are gonna be either blind, deaf, or mute and one person won't be able to use their hands. Let's hope that person isn't Olivia, because she's the only one of us that really can bake, like at all," Chris addressed the room and the camera.
"Dude, if I get fucking handcuffed, this is gonna be awful," I raised my brows and turned to Chris.
"Have a little faith, kid," Chris bumped my hip with his. I heard the car keys rattle on Matt's belt loop as he pressed himself away from the counter and came up behind me to wrap his arms around my neck. My hands subconsciously reached up to grip his muscular forearms.
"Alright, well, let's get the fuck on with it," Matt spoke.
"Okay, relax. We've been rolling for two fucking minutes." Nick stuck an accusatory hand up at Matt.
Nick reached around the counter for the hat and we all drew a card.
"Matt, you say yours first," Nick assigned.
"Mute," Matt chuckled, "Too easy."
"Deaf," I read aloud, "Yay! I just get to listen to music." I ran over to the couch and grabbed my headphones, working to connect them to my phone and find a playlist.
"Noo!," Chris whined, "Handcuffed."
"Loser", Nick teased.
"Which means that I am blind." Nick concluded, "Olivia wanted to bake something from scratch but that's a bit too hard for us, so we just got boxed brownies with, like, an extra cookie thing that we have to do too."
As Nick started to read off the contents of the box, I placed the headphones over my ears and pressed "shuffle" on Spotify. The first song to grace my ears was "B.Y.O.B" by System of a Down. A loud, scream-y nu-metal jam to deafen my sensitive ears. If I listened to anything too quiet, I'd be able to hear them. I watched as Matt tied the blindfold onto Nick and then Chris tied the bandana onto Matt. Matt then locked the handcuffs onto Chris' wrists behind his back.
I watched as the three of them tried to talk to each other, myself trying to read their lips and body language. I knew Matt well enough to know he was frustrated and Chris well enough to know he was giving Nick directions.
Quickly, when they started to struggle too much, they called me over. However, my eyes were closed as I mouthed the words to the song and I couldn't hear them.
"Everybody's going to the party have a real good time," I sang with Serj and wagged my finger to the Ooh.
What made me open my eyes was Matt pushing a hand against my lower back to guide me to the counter. The sudden jolt and touch startled me and I lurched forward, almost falling into the hard counter top face first. Matt's hand quickly shot and gripped my waist, pulling me back into him.
"Oh my God!" I yelped, my hands shooting out in front of myself to stop me before he did. He spun me around in his hands and I placed my extended hands on his chest, "Thank you!" I yelled, unaware of my volume. He just pressed a finger to my lips to tell me to be quieter. I whispered a faint apology in return.
I looked over to Chris who was probably spewing some bullshit at us about how cheesy we are, seeing as how his left cheek flexed up slightly in annoyance. Matt ushered me over to the counter where they handed me the box to try and fix what they already messed up. I took one look at the batter and knew they added too much oil.
"Okay," I started, "I think you guys just put too much oil, but it's not hard to fix. I just need a dehydrator like flour or cornstarch to dry out the oil." I turned around to grab the flour from the cabinets that I stock for them, because if I didn't they'd either starve or waste all of their money on eating out.
Due to my shorter stature, I had to stand on my tip toes and stretch the life out of my arms to reach the flour. Matt came up behind me and placed a hand on my side to tell me to relax and he reached up and grabbed it for me. I thanked him before turning around and continuing to mix the brownies, Matt's front just brushed my back the whole time as he watched over my shoulder, his hand resting gently on my hip.
Once I was done with the brownies, I needed to grab a bowl for the cookie part. I wasn't planning on making it, since it's supposed to be a challenge, but I still grabbed the equipment needed. I bent down in front of Matt to grab a smaller bowl from the cabinet below the island. When I leaned over, I didn't realize two things; one, how close I was to Matt and what he wouldn't be able to resist doing when he noticed the position we were in, two, how it would look on camera.
Both of Matt's hands found my hips when I unexpectedly stuck my ass into the air right in front of his dick and he subconsciously pressed himself a tiny bit further into me. Soon, his hand left my hip and it braced itself on the counter above my head so that I wouldn't hit the counter when I got back up.
"Okay, so you guys need to do this, because this is supposed to be your guys' challenge." I started clearly over the sound of Evanescenceâs "Going Underâ. I sang the words under my breath as I turned away to let them do what they needed to do. I hopped up onto the counter behind them and enjoyed my music as I watched them yell at each other.
At least I thought they were yelling at each other...
Turns out they were yelling at me to preheat the oven that I was sitting next to. I watched as Matt stepped closer to me. He placed his hands on my thighs and nodded to the oven dials. I quickly understood and turned the dial to 350 degrees. Matt's eyes darted all across my face and down my body that was only clothed in shorts and a tank top due to the intense Los Angeles heat. I knew exactly what look he was giving me and it was killing him that he couldn't kiss me.
"Later," I mouthed to him and leaned forward to kiss his forehead. He dropped his head to my shoulder and I wrapped my arms around his broad shoulder to squeeze him into me.
Soon after, the brownies had made it out of the oven safely and we were all stripped of our sense-depriving shackles. I was kind of disappointed to be done with the music, but I missed hearing my favorite boys talk.
"Okay, the brownies are done and they look fine," Nick began to the camera, "But we did fuck them up a little bit, so hopefully Olivia's fix was okay."
"Bro, she's literally a professional chef at this point, I'm sure they're still gonna be great," Chris said matter-of-factly. Nick began to cut the brownies, which they should've baked on parchment paper, and got a piece for all of us. He slid it in front of me and we all tried a bite. They still tasted great and they looked like boxes.
"Obviously, if it were up to me, we wouldn't have boxed anything, but for a boxed brownie mix," Matt came up and hugged me from behind and my hands fell to his that wrapped around me, "I would give this is a solid 8 out of 10." I said giving a thumbs up with the camera.
When they had all given their notes and feedback, they said goodbye to the camera and turned it off.
"You guys need to practice a little something called self-control, you horny fucks," Said Nick as he shook his head and took down the filming equipment.Â
"Shut the fuck up, Nick," Matt spat as he pulled me closer, "Hi, my girl. D'you have fun?" He asked, pressing a kiss to the top of my head.
I pulled back slightly and leaned up to kiss his lips, "Mhm. I always have fun filming with you guys." I smiled up at his stunning face.
"What'd you listen to?" He asked, pulling away from the hug to reach over and grab a cup from the cabinet, but keeping a hand on my waist. I turned to watch him as he got what he needed.
"I listened to System of a Down and Evanescence. I wish that, like, Nirvana or something came on though." I sighed and looked down for a moment before focusing my attention back on him.
"S'nice. I need to branch out, broaden my musical horizons," He said as he filled his cup with water from the fridge.
"And your kitchen horizons, because, my God, you guys suck at baking." I teased exasperatedely.
"Hey, watch yourself," He tutted, "They suck at baking, I, on the other hand, can whip up a good dessert."
"Alright, mister, I bought already-been-smoked salmon and tried to cook it anyway, Sturniolo." I accused, rolling my eyes jokingly.
"Oh, yeah? You want to play it that way?" He smiled smugly and slowly stepped toward me, setting his water down on the kitchen island.
I backed away in response and put my hands up in defense, "I'm not playing anything. M'just sayin' it how it is. S'not my fault your egos too big."
"You little-," He cut himself off and reached for me. A high-pitched yelp escaped my mouth as I dodged his hand and I backed away from him before running to his bedroom. I might be more agile than him, but his legs are much longer than mine. He caught up to me as I was trying to slam his door shut, and he stopped the door before I could close it. He swooped in quickly, picked me up, and tossed me onto the bed, kicking the door shut somewhere in between.
"Matt!" I giggled, as I sat up, bracing my hands behind me. He crawled onto the bed in front of me and shoved my chest back down.
"Those brownies might have been good," He leaned down and placed a gentle kiss right below my ear, "But I know you're gonna taste even better," He whispered into my ear and began to trail a path of open-mouthed kisses down my neck...
//
author's note: alright...how'd we like it? I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it, but I wanted to put something out. I liked the concept but I'm unsure of how it turned out. let me know what you guys think.
all the love, she <3
#matt sturniolo#chris sturniolo#nick sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#fluff#nicolas sturniolo#childhood best friends to lovers#fanfic#matthew sturniolo#sturniolo#matthew sturniolo imagine#matthew sturniolo fanfic
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pairing: s. gojo x reader | next part >
when megumi asks gojo to teach him how to ride a bike, he panicsâhow would he teach a kid how to ride a bike when he doesnât know how to ride one either? instead of admitting that, however, gojo goes out and buys a kidsâ bike with training wheels, reassuring megumi that âof course he knows how to ride a bike, heâs the best cyclist in the worldâ! megumi doubts him the moment gojoâs confident facade falls and he eyes the bike weirdly.Â
youâre in the bath at your small apartment when gojo calls you, saying he desperately needs you. you immediately jump out of the tub and dry yourself as you attempt to simultaneously throw on your uniform. when you get to gojoâs place, you quickly look around in fear that something is wrong only to find little megumi and tsumiki crowded around a gaudy blue bike. megumi looks up at you, a bike helmet a size too big pulled over his messy hair.Â
âare you going to teach me how to ride a bike?â he asks as he scratches at the velcro straps on his knee pads.Â
huh?
everything clicks into place when gojo comes around the corner with unnecessary biking equipment piled high in his arms. you grit your teeth. of course gojo would ask you to teach megumi how to ride a bike, you and suguru were the only ones who knew how to ride one in the first place. you didnât think it was too useful of a skill when you and your classmates were younger, especially after the young gojo clan head had called you a country bumpkin for knowing how to ride a bike, but you suppose it was important enough that gojo would deliberately go out of his way to get you to teach a kid how to bike.Â
as gojo deposits everything in his arms, you crouch down to megumiâs height with a smile on your face, pushing your still wet hair out of your eyes. you reach forward and adjust megumiâs helmet.Â
âhow long have you been biking with training wheels?â you ask, pulling the helmet straps a little tighter and clipping them into place.Â
megumi purses his lips as he looks away to think. âa few weeks,â he says, âi want to be the first one in my grade to know how to ride a bike without training wheels, though.â you let out a little laugh as megumi tucks his chin away from you, his cheeks a soft pink.Â
âalright, megumi, iâll make sure that youâre the first person in your grade to ride a bike.â you extend your pinky towards him, âi pinky promise,â you say, tilting your head with a bright smile. megumi shyly links his pinky with yours as your smile widens.Â
teaching megumi how to ride a bike is hard. gojo hovers over your shoulder as you run behind megumi as he pedals on his bike, watching with a small unhidden grimace every single time you let go of the back of the blue bike and tell megumi to âkeep goingâ! not only does having gojo next to you make it significantly harder to instruct megumi, but you also have to listen to him attempt to console and give wrong advice to the kid.Â
you groan outwardly as megumi topples over on his bike a few feet away from you. as gojo begins to walk towards him, you bring your arm up and block him.Â
âsatoru,â you warn, âif you continue to give megumi wrong advice again i will fucking punch you.â you turn towards him and glare sharply. âlet me do this.âÂ
you walk towards megumi and gojo falters, watching as you take the boy into your arms and pat the dirt off of him and make sure his knee pads are on tightly. the evening wind blows through your and megumiâs hair as you crouch down and pick up the ugly, scratched bike and help megumi settle back onto it. tsumiki stands up from the park bench sheâs seated at and makes her way towards gojo, watching as you and megumi begin to race even further down the parkâs bicycle only section. you let go and cheer loudly as megumi finally gets the hang of it, jumping up and down before bounding after him as he bikes around and around.Â
âi like them,â tsumiki tells gojo, letting gojo reach down and pull her hair out of her face as the wind begins to pick up even more.
âme too,â he admits softly, watching you and megumi turn around, listening as your and megumiâs elated laughter fills the empty park.
#vians.scribbs#jjk#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru x reader#jjk x you#gojo satoru x you#gojo x reader#gojo x reader fluff#gojo fluff#satoru gojo x reader#jjk fluff
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It's a reoccurring pattern with Steve, getting come out to and then instantly shitting on the person's taste in people.
Robin comes out to him and tells him she liked Tammy 'The Muppet' Thompson and Steve immediately jumps onto making fun of her because obviously, he will. She sounds like a goddamn muppet! Robin may deny it, but he knows she knows he's right. And he never lets her forget it.
After the Byers family moves back to Hawkins, Steve gets closer to the Byer-Hopper twins (Not blood related twins, but with how similar they are they might as well be). He takes note of the way Will carries himself, the way he stares at Micheal Asshole Wheeler of all people when he thinks no one is looking.
The kid doesn't come out that quickly, so with Robin's advice, Steve takes his time, making it known how okay he was with Will's sexuality, even if he did have standards low enough to beat Robin's terrible Tammy Thompson taste (He says this to her and she reacts as predictably as ever- by throwing something at him).
When Will does come out to him, Steve makes sure he only freezes for a literal second, not wanting the kid to panic like he'd seen Robin do back then. Of course, as soon as he's done comforting and reassuring the kid that he's completely fine with him being gay, he immediately jumps onto making fun of his terrible crush on Mike, finding great joy in the bright blush burning the teen's face.
The next time someone comes out to him, he's more caught off guard than he was with Robin.
Not because he was shocked that Eddie liked guys, no. He might be stereotyping a little, but no straight guy goes that close to another man and calls him Big Boy all low and seductively, a teasing grin curling his lips, a glint in his eyes-
You get the point.
The reason why he's shocked is because Eddie comes out to him, and when Steve asks about crushes, Eddie says,
"Oh, I had the worst crush on you in high school."
Steve sits there, his jaw practically on the ground. The way Eddie says it, all casual, not caring about the consequences or the effect it has on Steve.
"Wh- I- Me?" He stammered out, incredulous. "Dude, I was the biggest asshole back then!"
Eddie chuckles at that, a low sound that sends further heat into Steve's already flushed body. "The me back then did not give a shit, let me tell you that man." He turns to Steve then, giving him a slow look, a gaze more like, and smirks. "I certainly understood why the ladies were so desperate for you and your gorgeous locks."
His heart is pounding like crazy, an audible thump in his ears. Thoughts race in his head, one after the other, all jumbled up until what comes out of Steve's mouth next is,
"So what, you've got a thing for douchebags? Seriously?"
Eddie shoots him another look, more confused than ever. "What?"
"You heard me," Steve says, feeling the next words come out of his mouth like a waterfall. "I was a huge asshole in high school dude. How the hell did you have a crush on me back then? Did you seriously have no standards? You'd really stoop that low just because I had nice hair? I have good hair, and I'm nice now! What's stopping you from-"
Steve cuts himself off with an audible clack of his teeth, a sound that most often comes from Robin when she shuts herself up.
Goddamnit Robin.
Eddie is staring at him with wide eyes, the cigarette between his fingers burning away. Steve wants to watch the smoke curl away, but he's too transfixed on Eddie's doe-like gaze.
Then Eddie's features smooth over, a terrible, terrible grin curling its way onto his lips, deepening that dimple on his cheeks. He leans forward eyes lidded just slightly, and says,
"What's stopping me from what, sweetheart?"
#woo#that was impulsive#im practicing with my characterisation and im not sure if i wrote these two well enough#pls be honest i wanna write fics on these guys#steddie#stranger things 4#st4#steve harrington#eddie munson#steve x eddie#robin buckley#will byers
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Chasing Cars | ch 13 (jjk)
âsummary: when your brother goes to study on a semester abroad, your life collides with his best friend Jeon Jungkook, who's coincidentally your roommate. Will you survive the collision, or will you crumble into dust?
âpairings: brother's best friend!Jungkook x younger sister!female reader
ârating: 18+ (minors DNI, some chapters have mature content)
âgenre: forbidden love?au, college!au, slice of life!au, smut, angst (as usual a lot of it), fluff
âwarnings: college anxiety, angst, Gabrielle, Lisa, alcohol, cursing, mentions of cheating, a frat party, explicit content: implied sex
âword count: 8.9k
âa/n: more angst oop- I hope you guys like it :') thank you to @moonleeai for beta-ing, you're the best <3
âseries masterpost
âadd yourself to the taglist here!
âââââ
If I lay here If I just lay here Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Chasing Cars, Snow Patrol
âââââ
Friday, August 30
Summer came and went. Like everything in life, it became just a moment in time, a short movie consisting of flashing scenes of friendship and fun and sun, of pools and tanning and hikes. Summer was perfect, summer was healing, yet summer couldnât heal everything.
Summer hasnât healed a doe-eyed boy from your heart, but you think itâs okay. You think, perhaps your love for Jungkook is just everlasting, another one of those memories you know youâll cherish for the rest of your life.
You reckon, if you were to have kids one day and theyâd asked you who your first love was, you wouldnât be able to answer their father.
It will always be Jungkook, no matter the bitterness and the pain of the ending.
Itâs his necklace you wear on your heart every day after all.
Youâve worked all summer, amassing money to cover your expenses for the year. Youâve gone back home with Taehyung for a week your mother had off, and you spent it camping like you did when you were kids, gaze getting lost in starlight and sun rays on the water, reflections of light that left afterimages on your retina.
Much like Jungkook is an afterimage on your heart. Never fully erased, yet the pain isnât as sharp anymore. Like the time soothed its edges, reminding you of the good part, allowing you to let go of the bad.
The first news you had of Jungkook this summer was stories posted on a Saturday evening, of him and Lisa and friends in New York City. Turns out Lisa landed an internship at an architect firm in New York through her fatherâs connections, and turns out it was all she needed to be welcomed into Jeon Jungkookâs world over there.
Youâd been jealous back then, bitterly so. Yoongi, bless his heart, had forced you to hang out at his place, claiming the empty room needed to be repainted before Namjoon moved in for the semester. Itâd been a good distraction, and by the end of the weekend, youâd realized that Jungkook was allowed to have friends, to move on from your idyllic moment in his life.
It hurt, but it was a sign of healing.
You got closer to Yoongi over the summer. Learned all about his past, about his high school and how his parents were supportive when he came out, yet reluctant when he brought his first boy home. Heâd told you how he met Hoseok in his last year of high school despite not attending the same school, and how their friendship had immediately blossomed.
Only to wither in April, when Hoseok had chosen to leave. None of you or your friends have had any news of him since then, like he wiped his existence from all of your lives like it was nothing. Itâs been hard for Yoongi, harshly so, so youâve made sure to always be available for him, too.
Namjoon and Nabiâs relationship didnât suffer such a fate. Theyâve only been growing stronger over the summer, proof that despite Namjoon getting out of his relationship with his ex and jumping in the one with Nabi right away, they were meant for each other. In truth, youâve never seen anyone love each other like Namjoon and Nabi do, and maybe that most of all has healed your bleeding heart.
There has to be someone out there whoâll love you like youâre the one who paints his every sunset.Â
Seokjin wasnât on the receiving end of such a relationship. Heâd confessed to Ria halfway through the summer, telling her that he couldnât do the see-saw anymore, that he needed everything or nothing, and in good Ria fashion, your friend ran. She ran and ran, until Seokjin told her he was ashamed of having believed she deserved to be loved.
The blow has been hard on Ria, and she hasnât been with anyone since then. Hasnât mentioned Seokjin once either, but you know that, whenever you go out, heâs the one sheâs looking for.Â
The strangest part of this summer happened on a random Tuesday evening when youâd just come home from work. Taehyung and Ariane, ever so the lovebirds, had been hanging out in the living room when youâd crossed the threshold. Taehyungâs gaze had shot to you, and heâd uttered words you think have been carved into your brain.
âDid you know Jungkook is the heir of JJS pharmaceuticals?âÂ
You did. You knew about his fatherâs company - heâd told you once when youâd been lying with your head on his chest, one of the rare times heâd talked about his family after your weekend escapade to New York.
But you knew Jungkookâs existence had been mostly a secret, his father refusing to announce his existence to the world because Jungkook had refused to study at an Ivy League College.
At the confusion on your face - or rather, the masked pain youâd been hiding for weeks and months - Taehyung had added, âThere was a conference press, and heâs all over social media.â
He was. You found out quickly enough, articles and articles about him showing up on your Instagram as well. Youâd seen pictures from the press conference: though his father had been smiling wide, Jungkook had only been staring at the camera, like heâd wished he could disappear.
You donât know what led him to accept a position at his fatherâs company before heâd even graduated, but you knew then and know now that it had to not have been his choice.
So indeed, summer came and went until it became just a memory, and the new semester now looms over the horizon, a reminder that though your skin might have been sunkissed these last few months, itâs now time to return to reality.
Youâre sitting in the kitchen, indulging in Buldak noodles as you read a book about Faes and High Lords and a Night Court. Youâve started reading again over the summer, another way to escape that helped fill your breaks at work when you didnât go out for lunch with your coworkers. It was nice to reconnect with your previous love for reading - indeed, youâd spent years in middle school and high school getting lost in fantasy and dystopian worlds, and recovering this part of you might have been another way to heal.
Itâs reminded you that every story is worth telling, even those that donât end well.
So you sit at the kitchen table, halfway done with your noodles, when the front door opens and closes.Â
âHello!â you greet out of reflex.
Taehyung and Ariane were out shopping for groceries, and though they havenât left a long time ago, you assume itâs them coming home.
âDo you need any help?â you ask as no one replies, which is strange.
Theyâre always talking about everything and nothing, joking around like theyâre the only people in the world. Itâs something you do find cute, but that always grates your nerves in all the wrong ways.
Where Nabi and Namjoon have been making you feel hopeful when it comes to love, Taehyung and Ria have made you jaded too.
The silence prolongs, and you donât even hear them taking off their shoes. You furrow your brows, wondering if theyâre trying to prank you. So you put your book down even though you are in the middle of a good scene, and you push up from the table, heading towards the kitchenâs doorway.
You reckon, maybe you should have expected it. Youâd known he was coming back at some point - he still has a year left of college. But you didnât think heâd show up on an early Friday evening, clutching his duffel bag and standing by the door like heâs a guest in his own home.
Heâs changed. The first thing you notice is that heâs changed: he doesnât have the eyebrow piercing anymore, his hair is shorter - almost entirely shaved at the sides - and though he still has the lip piercings, he looks different than what you remember.
As if a few months was enough to blur your memories of Jeon Jungkook, and the wound youâd thought to be healed over the last few months reopens, pouring liquid lava on your entire body until you think youâre burning, and not in a good way.
Heâs dressed in all black, like some things donât change after all. He looks more built than he was last semester, like heâs gone to the gym a lot more over the summer. His tattoos have also changed - theyâve been coloured, some of them, as if he tried to put colours back into his life.
You hope it worked. But when you hold his gaze, the heaviness making you want to disappear through the floor, you think maybe it didnât work at all.
âY/n,â he greets.
His voice has changed too. Or maybe itâs just the emotions, maybe itâs just the fact that the last thing he ever told you were those words in the letter you keep hidden in your night table, words youâve romanticized every night trying to fall asleep.
Not that you would tell anyone.
âJungkook,â you reply in the same tone.
He nods once, his Adamâs apple bobbing, and then he takes off his shoes. You watch him, dumbly standing in the doorway, and he shoots you a look once his shoes - black boots that look far too warm for the summer - are off.
âHow are you?â
His three words throw you off. They make you feel like last semester might have been a construct of your imagination, but then again you hold that letter too dearly, and the memories of him have been your favourites for months now.
âIâm okay,â you reply, nodding once. âHow are you?â
He pulls on his piercings, the gesture familiar yet so different than how youâve been imagining it every night. âIâm chill.â
He starts to walk towards his room, but he stops halfway there, glancing over your head into the kitchen.Â
âWant something to eat?â you ask, and you wonder if he hears your heart as it picks up in your chest.
You see the moment he spies the Buldak noodles on the table. He smiles softly, with his eyes first, and you think maybe this is it.
Maybe he came back home.
Came back home to you.
But then his features fall, the smile vanishing and darkness invading his gaze. He shakes his head no, nodding towards his room. âThanks, but I gotta unpack.â
You watch him walk the rest of the way towards his bedroom. He turns the knob, pushes the door open, yet he freezes there. His shoulders tense, and even though you donât see his features, you know he wants to say something else.
You hope he will, hope heâll say something that might mend the bridge between the two of you. That might erase this abyss between you and him until the ending disappears.
You know itâs because you havenât seen him in a long time. Know that, when it all comes down to it, you wouldnât go back to him - he broke your heart, and youâd be a fool to return to him. But you like to imagine that you would as he stands there, that youâd run to him if he turned and said the right words.
But he doesnât. He sighs, and then he walks into his room, shutting the door softly behind him. And as he disappears from view, you feel yourself stumble, like youâve taken a hit right to the chest. You lay a hand over your beating heart, almost expecting to feel blood trickling through your fingers.
As if heâs just broken your heart all over again, torn it from your ribcage. Yet it breaks - you didnât think he still had that power over you.
Hell, you thought youâd been moving on.
You walk back into the kitchen, the room spinning around you. You drop in the chair you were sitting in before, eyeing your book. And though you want to get lost in the fantasy world again, youâre bleeding out on your chair, pain burning along every single one of your nerves.
How are you supposed to share a roof with the one that broke your heart?
The answer is easy. You canât.
You need to get out of here, and quickly.
Monday, September 2ndÂ
Your first day back to college is long. Youâve got two classes - a morning and an afternoon class, both of them three hours long.Â
When the second one ends - luckily half an hour early âbecause itâs the first dayâ as the professor said - you make your way out of class with Nabi. Sheâs typing away on her phone, likely asking Namjoon when heâll be home, yet she follows you as you head to the dorms.
Youâve been crashing at the girlsâ dorm over the weekend, as you try to figure out what you should do. You havenât figured anything yet - Taehyungâs been telling you that you shouldnât move out, asking if itâs because of Ariane moving in, and though youâve been good at avoiding mentioning Jungkook, thereâs just so much you can do before you burst and admit that itâs because of him.
But itâs okay - Nabiâs been staying with Yoongi and Namjoon, so you have her bed all to yourself, and Ria and you have been treating it like a massive sleepover, doing face masks every night and getting mildly drunk on Saturday.
Nabi sighs as you walk towards the dorms, and you throw her a look.Â
âWhatâs wrong?â
âI feel like this semester is about to be the worst,â she admits, slightly shaking her head. âNamjoon basically confirmed it.â
You hook your arm with hers, resting your head on her shoulder. âBaby, itâs fine. Weâre in this together.â
âItâs easy for you to say, youâre the top of our class.â
âAnd youâre the second,â you remind her. âWeâll be okay, I promise.â
She nods, heaving out a heavy breath again. âIs it bad that Iâm already anxious?â
You donât reply right away, as you pass through a group of engineer students gathered in front of a class, most likely getting ready for an evening class. An evening class on the first MondayâŚÂ
You feel bad for them.
âItâs not bad,â you reply once youâve finally walked past. âIt means that you care about your grades. You just need to not let it eat you alive.â
âI think Iâm just realizing that getting into med school might be harder than we thought,â she says with a sigh.
You stop, tugging on her arm so that she stops too. âNo, Iâm not having any of that,â you tell her. âWeâll both get in, Nabi, I promise.â
âAre you sure?â she asks, folding her arms on her chest.
âYup.â You nod forcefully. âDead serious. And after that, itâs smooth sailing until residency. And then we get a residency together, and we become sexy doctors.â
âBruh,â she lets out, and she chuckles.
Youâre happy your distraction works because you truthfully didnât know where you were headed with it. âI promise!â you insist. âGive us a couple of years, and weâll have our own practice.â
âYou want to be a surgeon, and I want to be an ophthalmologist,â she reminds you. âNot quite sure weâd practice at the same place.â
You shrug, and you start walking towards the dorms again. âTo be fair, weâll probably both end up at a hospital. We just need to find a way to work at the same one.â
She purses her lips. âThat sounds doable.â
You smirk mischievously. âDamn right.â
*****
Nabi ends up staying with you and Ria at the dorm for a couple of hours after class, and you order takeout that you eat sitting in a circle on the floor like you usually do when you do pre-drinks before a party. Itâs fun, more chill than a pre-party gathering, and Ria tells you all about how she ran into Seokjin on campus today.
âHe didnât even look at me,â she admits. âWhat a dick.â
You exchange a knowing look with Nabi. âMaybe he didnât see you,â you try.
âHe ignores me when we all hang out together too,â she points out. âHeâs doing it on purpose.â
Nabi scrunches up her nose. âYeah⌠you did lead him on for months.â
âNot my fault if he fell in love,â Ria grumbles, her gaze dropping to the rice bowl sheâs eating.
âIt might not be your fault, but you still led him on,â Nabi pushes.
Ria huffs a breath, scoffing, but she doesn't say anything. She never really does when it comes to Seokjin anyway.
âWhy are you so against the idea of being with him again?â you ask.
The scalding look you earn would put a dragon to shame. âBecause I donât want to be in a relationship,â she says, sounding like you a year ago when your friends had been pestering you about Hoseok.
Oh, how the tables have turned.
âWe all know heâd treat you like a goddess though,â Nabi says. âThe guyâs a hopeless romantic.â
Ria rolls her eyes. âCringe.â
You playfully push her, and she bursts out laughing. You donât miss the way her cheeks have dusted with pink though - and neither does Nabi - but you donât mention it.
You have a feeling Ria is lying to herself more than sheâs lying to the both of you, but youâd never dare tell her. Sheâll figure it out on her own or not, and thatâs what being in college is.
You try stuff; some of it works, and some doesnât.Â
Jungkook invades your thoughts, your chest aching all over again. You reach for the peach at the end of the chain, playing with the pendant mindlessly as if that can tame the ache, push it back to the back rooms of your mind.
It barely works, yet you manage to be able to let go of him after a few deep breaths, and a prolonged silence of Nabi staring at Ria while the latter is solely focused on eating. Your unease went unnoticed, which you reckon is a relief.
Confiding in them about Jungkook has helped over the summer, obviously, but there are some things you want to keep to yourself. Because Jungkook deserves the centrepiece in all of the secrets youâve ever held - he was the grandest of them all last semester after all.
Still is, considering youâve been lying to Taehyung about him all summer. Not that you really had to lie. You just avoided mentioning Jungkook, staying vague about your semester while Taehyung told you everything about Paris.Â
And so you end up saying goodbye to Nabi when she decides to go over to Yoongi and Namjoonâs apartment - Namjoon was quick to take Hoseokâs old room, seeking to leave the dorms once and for all - and you and Ria watch Demon Slayer, her favourite anime.
Coincidentally one of Jungkookâs favourite animes too, not that it matters.
You sigh - reminders of him are everywhere lately, and though you have been moving on over the summer, the ache has been revived. You wonder what heâs doing right now. Is he at home, watching anime or playing video games? Is he hanging out with Taehyung, with Jimin and their other friends? Or is he locked up in his room like he was all of Friday, before you fled the apartment?
It shouldnât matter to you, but it does. Because Jungkook will always matter: he meant too much to you. Still does, and you donât know what to make of it.
Ria sighs, pulling you out of your thoughts as the episode finishes. You glance at her - youâre lying side by side on her bed, a laptop in between you to watch the show.
âWhatâs wrong?â you ask her.
She purses her lips, shrugging, though it proves to be awkward considering the position. âI donât know. Itâs just⌠Is something wrong with me?â
A concerned crease appears between your eyebrows. âWhy would you say that?â
âI donât knowâŚâ She pauses, gaze still focused on the laptop screen as if she canât bring herself to meet your own. âWhy am I so opposed to relationships? To love in general?â
Oh.Â
âOh RiaâŚâ you let out.
âDonât,â she warns. âI donât want to be pitied.â
You press your lips in a tight line, nodding once. She chuckles, and then she starts the next episode, like she needs a moment to collect her thoughts.
âItâs justâŚâ she says as Tanjiro fights a demon, the fight continued from the last episode. âIâm aware that Seokjin would be good for me. I enjoyed spending time with him too. But the second he mentioned feelingsâŚâ
âIt turned you off,â you complete for her.
She nods. âIt really did.â
âWhy do you think it did?â you ask, even though you know it has to be because of her ex.
She sighs deeply. âThatâs the thing. I really donât know. I had a loving family growing up, so I canât blame it on that. I had friends too, good friends, but then when my ex cheatedâŚâ
âIt broke the part of you that could trust easily,â you say. âAnd itâs understandable, and totally valid.â
âI guess soâŚâ she trails off. âI just feel like letting someone in is too much of a vulnerability.â
âThat makes sense,â you say. âYou like being in control, and you feel like being in a relationship would make you lose control.â
She glances at you, eyes slightly narrowed. âSometimes I swear to God you sound like a therapist.â
You laugh - itâs not the first time youâve been told that. Yoongi said so last semester too, when youâd helped him get over Hoseok.
âDonât ask me for advice though,â you say, scrunching up your nose. âI donât think Iâd have any good advice.â
âNot to be mean, but after what you put yourself through last semester, I donât think your advice would be really helpful,â she teases.
You widen your gaze. âThat was mean.â
She pouts, offering you puppy eyes. You push her on the shoulder, and she rolls on her back, laughing. âNo, but seriously,â she says. âI donât blame you. You fell in love, and thatâs not your fault, is it?â
You remain silent, not wanting the conversation to turn to Jungkook.Â
âIâm sorry,â she apologizes after a few seconds of silence. âYouâre right, that was mean.â
âYouâre not wrong, though,â you reassure her. âI saw all the red flags and chose to ignore them.â
Ria turns on her side again, facing you. âThatâs love for you. Everyone ignores all the red flags the moment they start having feelings for someone else.â
Like Seokjin, but you donât say it. You highly doubt she needs to hear it.
âCheers to that,â you say, though you are void of any beverage at the moment.
Youâve left your water bottle on the floor, too far to reach from where youâre lying in bed.
âYou know what we should do?â Ria says a while later, when the episode is coming to an end. âWe should go to the party on Friday. The one Daveâs frat is hosting.â
The name Dave rings an extremely distant bell - you think you went to a party hosted by his frat last semester, but youâre not quite sure.
âI thought we were already planning to go.â
Ria looks at you, mischief slowly filling her gaze. âWe should go and find some cute guys to forget about all of our problems with.â
You laugh. âMen arenât the solution to everything, you know that, right?â you tease.
âOof. Theyâre the root of the problem most of the time, I know.â She pauses, purses her lips. âBut weâre due to have fun. You know Nabi and Namjoon will come for an hour or two and disappear anyway.â
âWhat about Yoongi?â
âWeâll find him someone too! He deserves it.â She nods, clearly convinced that her plan is the best sheâs ever come up with.
And Yoongi does, you think that out of the three of you, heâs the one that deserves a healthy relationship the most.Â
So you nod your head, saying, âItâs going to be lit.â
You can only hope that it is and that you donât end up crying because of a certain doe-eyed man you should have let go of months ago.
Friday, September 6th Â
[11:17 am] brĂśtherđ˝: just letting you know that Gaby is in town so Ari will be staying with her [11:17 am] brĂśtherđ˝: come home
The texts Taehyung sent to you in the morning sit unanswered on your phone. Mostly because you didnât know what to say - he still firmly believes youâve decided to move out because of Ariane, and you think it might have killed a possible friendship with her in the bud.
If only they knew why you truly left. It likely wouldnât be any better - Jungkook would be dead in a ditch somewhere, and youâd be grounded by your older brother like you were when you were in high school.
You know Taehyung is likely only going to grow suspicious if you ignore him, but you really just donât know what to say. Heâs likely going to be at the party tonight - youâll make an effort to speak to him, to reassure him, and then youâll disappear with your friends.
That is, if Jeon Jungkook isnât with him. Because if Jungkookâs there, youâll avoid Taehyung like the plague, no matter if that might make him even more suspicious.
âI literally cannot physically wait,â Ria says next to you, and you shoot her a quick look as she puts mascara on.
Sheâs going all out tonight, and you wonder if itâs because Yoongi mentioned Kim Seokjin will be in attendance. Obviously, you donât want to attract her ire, so you donât say it, but you reckon Seokjin has been a ghost in every conversation since last Monday.
Much like Jungkook has been, but youâve been good at pretending he hasnât.
âI really hope theyâve stocked up on free alcohol,â you say, knowing youâll need it, mostly because if Taehyung is in attendance, then Ariane will likely be, and so will Gabrielle.Â
Your heart sinks in your chest at the thought - you havenât told Ria, not wanting to ruin her enthusiasm.Â
âDo you want to curl your hair?â Ria says as she finishes with the mascara.Â
You shrug. âNah, I think Iâll keep it natural,â you answer. âBut you should curl yours.â
She narrows her gaze, staring at herself in the mirror. âYou know what, yeah, I should.â
You chuckle, and then you both busy yourself getting ready. You apply more makeup than you usually do, only because you know itâll be a mask youâll use all evening.
Does Gabrielle even know about your existence?
You finish getting ready, stealing from Riaâs closet to get dressed. You settle on a pair of black leather pants, along with a black crop top t-shirt that hugs tight to your frame, revealing just an inch of the bird tattoo you got done on your right ribs in May.
You stare at the ink, thinking about Taehyungâs reaction. Heâll likely be pissed at you, but youâre done caring. If he wants to be mad, then so be it.
âYour ass looks amazing in this,â Ria compliments from behind you, and you snort as you turn to look at her.
Sheâs wearing a sage green corset that leaves little to the imagination. You compliment her in return, and she winks at you, before suggesting to down a couple of shots before leaving. You immediately agree, and youâve got a light buzz by the time you leave the dorms, heading to the frat house.
Itâs already crowded by the time you get there, the loud music having attracted all the party-goers on campus. The front lawn is cramped, and Ria grabs your hand, pulling you through the crowd to head to the house proper.
You make it to the hall, and luckily enough, there aren't as many people here. Youâre able to navigate to the living room, where Dave - he really is the guy from last semester - finds you, offering drinks to the two of you.
You grab a beer, not trusting the questionable punch that Dave claims was prepared earlier today. Ria follows your lead, and you clink bottles with Dave, who admits he has no clue whatâs in the punch when youâve all taken your first sips.
âBruh, why were you trying to sell it to us then?â Ria asks, eyebrows raised.
Dave laughs, shrugging his shoulders. âColton said it was good.âÂ
Colton⌠you wonder if itâs the same Colton that had warned you about Jungkook once.
âAnd weâre supposed to trust Colton?â Ria teases.
Dave winces. âNot really, no, heâs already drunk.â
Ria nods as you take a sip of your beer, the bitter liquid heady on your tongue. You turn your head to the side, noticing a very distraught Yoongi walking into the living room, followed close by an even more distraught Seokjin. You wave them over, and Ria and Dave both turn their heads towards the new arrivals.
You notice Ria tensing from the corner of your eye, and Seokjin looks just as uncomfortable as he stops next to you. You hug Yoongi hello, and he doesnât let you go right away, whispering in your ear, âThis place is a shitshow, I donât think weâll stay.â
You pout as you pull away. âWe said beer pong,â you remind him.
He rolls his eyes, though you know heâs always liked playing beer pong. So you manage to convince him to go for at least one game, though you know youâll have to wait in line for a while before itâs your actual time to play. It makes for an awkward waiting - Ria and Seokjin are both ignoring each other, and Yoongi and you are standing in the middle, trying to engage in conversation.
Youâre finally on the side of the table when you recognize your brotherâs laugh, a sound you were sort of hoping not to hear in this crowd. You look to your left - heâs by the garden doors that lead to the backyard, Ariane cuddled up against him, and you think the girl standing with her back to you has to be Gabrielle.
âShit,â you let out.
Yoongi furrows his brow at the sudden curse. âWhatâs wrong?â You motion towards the door, and his eyes widen. âIs that who I think it is?â
He knows about Gabrielle. Heâs stalked her with you, during one of your many downward spirals, and Gabrielle has that kind of aura that is all too recognizable, even if youâve only seen her once in a picture.
âI think so,â you reply, and Ria finally leans in to join the conversation.
âIs that Gaby?â she asks, loud enough for the people around you to hear.
You tap her arm, giving her a warning glance, though youâre pretty sure no oneâs actually listening. Even Seokjin didnât glance towards you at the outburst.
But Taehyung notices you, and you quickly turn away, pretending to be focused on the game unfolding on the table in front of you. Thereâs one cup on the left, three on the other side, and the girls playing are clearly more talented than you: they both shoot it in the lone glass when their turn comes, hugging as they shriek in happiness from their victory.
âLetâs go,â Ria says, and she pulls you to one end of the table as soon as the girls have moved.Â
Yoongi and Seokjin take the other side, even though Seokjin truly does appear like he wishes he wasnât here, and you put the cups back into their spot, reorganizing the table.
Your brother appears next to you before you start, and you offer him a tight-lipped smile.
âWhatâs wrong with you?â he asks.Â
âMe?â you let out, your voice uncharacteristically high. âNothing.â
âYouâve been ignoring me,â he says through gritted teeth, the typical Kim temper flaring up.
You grab the neon orange ball Ria hands you, shrugging your shoulders. âI havenât. Just been busy.â
He clenches his jaw, yet remains silent as you focus on the table, preparing for the first shot, the one that determines who between you and Ria or Yoongi and Seokjin will play first.
Youâre against Yoongi, so you know youâve already lost when you shoot. To your surprise, Yoongi misses, his ball bouncing off on the side of a cup. Yours flies way off the table, and you wince.
âThat was trash,â Taehyung comments.
âThanks,â you fire back.
Ria and Seokjin throw, and Ria surprisingly manages to get the shot. You clap your hands as she offers you a thumbs-up.
âSeriously though,â Taehyung asks, handing you the ball that Seokjin threw. âWhatâs wrong? Why did you move out?â
âHold on,â you say.Â
You take a deep breath, trying to push the anxiety of his questioning away, and you throw. The ball stays on the table this time, bouncing right next to one of the cups.
âHonestly itâs just so that I can spend time with Ria,â you answer, motioning to your friend. âSheâs going through shit.â
Ria tenses next to you, offering you a quick glare before she focuses on shooting, unfortunately missing the cups.
âOh,â Taehyung lets out. âI thought it was because of Ari.â
Speaking of Ari, you donât see her anywhere near. You wonder where she went off to - are you lucky enough that she and Gabrielle left the party?
âNot at all,â you reply, and then you focus on the game as Seokjin and Yoongi prepare to throw. They both make it into a cup, and you clink your almost empty beer with Riaâs, taking a long sip before you move the cups to the side. âAriâs super sweet.â
âSheâll be relieved when I tell her so,â Taehyung admits. âShe was saying she could leave if it was an issue with you that she moves in with us.â
âIt really isnât,â you reassure Taehyung, feeling momentarily guilty for making Ariane feel like that. âIâll probably come back eventually too.â
Taehyungâs eyes light up. âThatâd be sick. We need to start doing Taco Tuesdays again.â
Taco Tuesdays. Youâd forgotten all about them last semester - youâd spent every Tuesday last fall eating tacos with Taehyung, Jungkook joining once in a while. It was a tradition youâd had growing up with your mother too - when she wasnât too busy working.
âIâm down,â you reply, and you get ready to throw.
To your surprise, you make the shot, landing it in the first cup at the front. Ria throws hers, and it bounces on the rim of one of the glasses before Seokjin catches it expertly.Â
âIs Jungkook coming tonight?â you ask.
Everything stills inside of you. You donât even know why you asked - you didnât even think about it before the question fell. But then again, you think it makes sense that Jungkook would invade your thoughts now.Â
When does he not?
Ria throws you a curious look at the question, though you donât miss the disapproval in the furrow of her brows.Â
âJK?â Taehyung says, as if he wasnât sure. âI donât think so. He says he wants to focus on college this semester.â
You nod curtly, getting ready to defend your cups as Seokjin and Yoongi throw. To your luck, they both miss, and you let Ria shoot first as you focus on Taehyung again.
âMakes sense now that he has to work for his fatherâs company, no?â you say, trying to sound as if you donât care.
As if Jungkook is not the center of your universe, still to this day.
âI guess so,â Taehyung comments, and you throw, entirely missing the table again.
Ria lands hers in a cup though, which leaves four cups in front of the boys and three in front of you and Ria.
âI still canât believe the motherfucker is rich and he never told us,â Taehyung adds.
You get the feeling. You still think New York was a fever dream - even more so now that youâve lost Jungkook. The thought makes your heart ache in your chest, and it trickles down your body, burning all along the way.
âItâs crazy,â you let out, and it sounds just as flat as you feel - like maybe your heart just flatlined in your chest.
Taehyung makes a non-committal sound, and youâre able to focus on the rest of the game without any interruption. You evidently end up losing to Seokjin and Yoongi, and you shake hands with the boys, congratulating them for their win, even though youâd all expected it.Â
âIâll go get something to drink,â Taehyung says when you finally glance his way again. âStay away from the punch.â
And then he leaves, and you mimic him as he walks away, raising your middle finger to his back. Ria snorts next to you, and you laugh along with her.
âHeâs making me want to have some of the punch,â she says, and you laugh harder.
âHard pass,â Seokjin says, and Ria stiffens next to you. âI tasted it, and it tastes like piss.â
âWouldnât even be surprised if someone pissed in it,â Yoongi says. âThis party isâŚâ
âJuvenile?â you provide.
Ria laughs, though it sounds a little forced. âItâs fun, stop.â
She sounds just as unconvinced as you think she seems, yet you all donât mention it, which you reckon happens a lot around her lately.Â
âI think weâll head out,â Yoongi says after a few seconds. âWant to have a beer back at my place?â
âAnd disturb the lovebirds?â Ria answers. âNo thank you.â
Indeed, Namjoon and Nabi chose to stay in tonight, and you donât have to use a lot of brain power to imagine what they might be doing right now, when they finally have full privacy in the apartment.
âRight,â Yoongi lets out. He winces, then shrugs his shoulders. âGuess weâre stuck here for a couple of hours, then.â
He says that in Seokjinâs direction, who runs a hand on his forehead before nodding. âCan we at least go outside?â
âSure. You girls coming?â Yoongi asks, motioning to the backyard.
Ria doesnât even wait for you to reply, instead tugging you towards the garden doors. You stop her, glancing over your shoulder. âI actually really have to pee, but Iâll join you guys outside?â
She narrows her gaze in suspicion, and you furrow your brows. She leans in, whispering, âAre you trying to leave me alone with Seokjin?â
You snort. âNot at all,â you reply, patting her hand on your arm. âI genuinely am just about to pee myself. You know how I am with beer.â
She fake-gags, and you playfully push her as she bursts out laughing. âAyt, weâll be outside.âÂ
You wave them goodbye, and Seokjin awkwardly waves back before following Yoongi and Ria. You chuckle at the sight before heading to the bathroom, which you think is probably on the second floor.
So you make it towards the staircase you see in the corner, squeezing through the crowd and apologizing all the way, though most people are too drunk to even notice you. You successfully make it to the staircase, and you walk around the group of girls sitting on the steps, making it to the second floor unscathed.Â
âBathroom?â a guy who clearly looks like he belongs to the frat asks you.
You almost startle at the unexpected question, though you recover quickly, nodding your head.Â
âLast door on the left,â he tells you. âI think someoneâs in there right now though.â
âShould I not wait then?â you ask.
He chuckles. âFrom what I saw when I exited it was just one girl alone so, you should be good.â
âThanks,â you answer, offering him a small smile, and he nods once before heading down the stairs, though he quickly realizes that it might be too big of a feat. He indeed just plops down on the stairs, striking up a conversation with the girls there.
They look like they know him, so you walk away, heading to the last door on the left. You lean against the wall outside, pulling your phone out of your pocket.Â
No notifications greet you, so you push it back into your pocket, right as the door unlocks, and then opens.
You freeze, just as much as she does. Both of your gazes widening, until she lets out a small, âHelloâ, the word heavy with a French accent.
Of course, the girl in the bathroom had to be Gabrielle.
âHi,â you reply, and you try to smile, though youâre not sure it works.
âYouâre Taehyungâs sister, arenât you?â she asks.
You nod curtly. âThe one and only.â
She smiles. âThought so.â Thereâs a pause as she doesnât move from the doorway, and you just wait, awkwardness filling every inch of you.Â
Her next sentence throws you off the axis youâve been spinning on for months now, and you just stare at her in disbelief.Â
âYouâre not with Jungkook tonight?â she asks.
You feel hot and cold at the same time, your heart rate picking up uncomfortably in your chest. Your palms turn clammy, and you wouldnât be surprised if sweat appeared on your temples.
âIâm sorry, what?â
She frowns. âI thought Ari saidâŚâ she trails off, and then she shrugs her shoulders. âWhatever.â She smiles gently. âIâm happy heâs got you now.â
You think your eyes are bulging out of your head. They have to - the conversation isnât making any sense, and you arenât drunk enough to blame it on the alcohol.
âWhat?â
Her frown reappears. âArenât you two dating now?â
You laugh. Itâs a sad, pathetic laugh, and Gabrielle looks at you like youâre crazy.
âHe cheated on me with you,â you say. âWhy would I be dating him?â
The frown falls, replaced by utter surprise. Her mouth opens on a silent âOhâ, like she wants to say something but doesnât know what to say. It takes her a few seconds to collect herself, and then she says, âNon mais putain quâil est con.â
You donât speak French, so all you can do is cock an eyebrow quizzically. And then she lets out a small disbelieving laugh, shaking her head.
âI told him to tell you,â she says, and she closes her eyes, pinches the bridge of her nose. âBut heâs really stupid sometimes.â
âIâm sorry?â
She offers you a small smile bordering on pity, and you brace yourself for what sheâll say next.
âFille, Iâm gay,â she says. âJungkook was always only pretending to be my boyfriend so my family wouldnât know. I didnât know about you when I kissed him in Paris, and I only kissed him because Ari was growing suspicious.âÂ
You think youâre frozen in place. Like, stared into Medusaâs eyes and turned to stone frozen in place. All you can do is stare at Gabrielle, unblinkingly, as her words spin round and round in your head, caught in a dizzying tornado you canât follow.
âI told him to tell you,â she repeats, and she sounds far too apologetic for the erratic beating of your heart. For the realization that she just hit you with.
You think she hit harder than a physical slap would have.
âWhat?â you say, voice small and weak and oh so broken.
Months. Youâve been breaking for him for months⌠and for what? For a promise he refused to break, one that would have explained everything in a way that would have made you work.
You would have forgiven him, no hesitation. Hell, you reckon you would have told him you loved him, would have told him you wanted to be with him from now on until you turn to dust.
But he had to choose to respect a promise he made years ago, to an ex that wasnât really an ex after all, was she?
Just a friend from high school.
She was, after all, just a friend from high school.
She nods. âYeah. He told me all about you.â She smiles again, though this time itâs just sad, like she knows just how shattered you are over this man. âI was rooting for you two.â
âHe didnât tell me,â you whisper as if Gabrielle hadnât already pieced that together. âWhy?â
She sighs. âHeâs stupid,â she says as an explanation. âHeâs the kind thatâll sacrifice himself if it means helping someone else. I suppose you know that already.â
You nod, because you do.
He sacrificed himself for you last semester when you got home crying on Valentineâs Day. And he sacrificed countless parties over his promise to Taehyung to look after you.
And he sacrificed you to protect Gabrielleâs secret.
âHoly shit,â you let out.
âTalk to him,â she says softly. âGo talk to him now. Iâm not letting him lose you over me.â She scoffs, the frown sheâd sported earlier returning. âI should have realized before. That he didnât tell you. Iâm sorry.â
Your gaze widens, and you shake your head no. âOh, no, donât apologize. Itâs not your fault.â
Itâs not your fault if he broke my heart.
Itâs always just been his fault, hasnât it?
But then again⌠you know now. You know that he never cheated on you, that he was right when he was saying that it wasnât what you thought it was.Â
You know that he was there, with you. That he felt for you what you felt for him, that he was chasing cars around your head, too.
And if thereâs a chance you can salvage that, repair two hearts in one stone, you know you have to do it.
âI have to talk to him.â You say the words with quiet conviction, and Gabrielle nods, offering you an encouraging smile. âFuck.â
âGo to him, fille,â Gabrielle says. âAnd tell him heâs an enfoirĂŠ for me.â
You highly doubt youâd be able to repeat that word, yet you still say, âWill do.â
And then you take off, entirely forgetting that you had to pee. You have one goal in mind, and itâs to run home, where you know he has to be according to what Taehyung said. You donât even stop to text him, to confirm that he really is.
No, you run down the stairs, through the crowd and outside. The front lawn isnât as crowded as earlier, and you easily make it to the sidewalk, skidding to a halt just long enough to change direction.Â
And then youâre running home. Running home to him, your heart beating wildly. For the right reason this time. And as you run, lungs struggling to get enough oxygen in, thighs burning with heat, you feel infinite. You feel like youâre a star in the sky above, or maybe the moon returning to her lover. You feel like a bird soaring high, like a dolphin riding the waves.
You feel young and old and small and big, all at once. Like nothing is ever going to stop you again. You feel in love, you are in love, and after all the months of suffering, you reckon itâs the most beautiful feeling youâve ever experienced.
You didnât know you could sprint like you are right now, yet even though your body is straining, youâre not slowing down. Youâve pulled your phone out of your pocket to make sure it doesnât fall as you run, yet you donât slow down.
You canât slow down anymore, not when your gravity finally aligned with his again.
Like it was always meant to be. Because itâs always been meant to be you and him, hasnât it?
You make it home in a record time, climbing up the stairs⌠only to realize you donât have your keys. They are back at the dorms, but itâs too late.
You try the door, and to your surprise, the doorknob turns, and you barge into your home, barge into this life with him.
You catch your breath as you stop in the hall, doubling over when you realize youâve actually ran - sprinted - for nearly a mile. Youâre lucky the frat house wasnât further away - you highly doubt you would have made it home if it was any further.
âY/n?â Jungkook says from his bedroom.
You straighten, trying to catch your breath. And the second your eyes land on him, you know it was all worth it.
Every single second of suffering was worth it to be here with him tonight.
âJungkook,â you say in between two heaving breaths.
Heâs shirtless, his honey skin just as warm as you remember it to be. Heâs in fact only wearing grey joggers, and his hands are lost in his pockets like heâs trying to look nonchalant.
The concern on his features tells you he, as a matter of fact, isnât as nonchalant as heâs trying to appear.
âShit,â you let out. âJungkook.â
âYes?â
You laugh. You know you might look crazy, but you literally just ran a mile for this man, and each foot was worth it.Â
The grandest journey of your life, wasnât it?
âShe told me,â you say.
He cocks an eyebrow. âWhat?â
âGabrielle told me everything.â You surprise yourself by blinking away tears, and you let out a small laugh as you go to dry them.
Jungkook remains silent, just staring at you with horror slowly inching into his gaze. You donât know how, or why, but it only occurs to you then that he might not be alone right now.Â
âKook?â you whisper, unable to say it louder.
Not when youâre slowly crashing down from the high.
âY/n, IâŚâ he trails off. He closes his eyes, head hanging low. âI wasnât expecting this.â
You gulp as you swallow. âYeah, huh.â
You look down, noticing a pair of sneakers youâve never seen before.
It takes all of the courage you can muster up to look back up when the door of the bathroom opens, revealing a dishevelled Lisa, in only a t-shirt you recognize all too well.
Youâd used to sleep in that t-shirt, too.
Lisa sees you after you see her, turning beet red. Sheâs naked under Jungkookâs shirt, or at least you think she is.
You assume she is considering that heâs shirtless too.
âOh,â you let out.
Choke out might be a more appropriate word. Because youâre crashing, and youâre crashing hard. Hitting the wall at 120 mph, splattering on it until thereâs nothing left of you. Nothing left of that hope youâd found at the party, the hope Gabrielle had so kindly gifted you even though she owed you nothing.
Someoneâs screaming. You think someoneâs screaming - is it just in your head?
âHey, Y/n,â Lisa says awkwardly. âDidnât know you were here.â
âI live here,â you reply, voice empty of any emotion.
She purses her lips, nodding once, and then she hesitantly walks out of the bathroom. âIâm sorry I⌠I didnât know youâd be here tonight.â
Neither did you. Neither did Jungkook - it would have saved everyone a whole lot of breaking if youâd known.Â
If youâd known that having hope for Jeon Jungkook was futile and useless.Â
How could you even think you were meant to be with him? There is no universe for you and him out there. Just different worlds of breaking. Because itâs all your soul knows how to do - all your soul knows is to break for him, to shatter and crash and fracture for the man standing in front of his opened bedroom door.
âNo worries,â you say, though this time your voice does wobble.
This time, the pain does colour your tone in heartbreak blue.
Jungkook just remains silent, like heâs suddenly gone mute. You think itâs better like this - if he were to say anything right now, you think youâd likely break down here. Instead, you take a deep breath, pat your pockets and say, âI think I forgot my keys at the party.â
Unable to help yourself, you glance towards Jungkook once. He meets your gaze - he looks infinitely pained, the heartbreak stark on his features too. Thereâs some reassurance in knowing that heâs breaking, too. That youâre doing it together.Â
Heartbreak isnât as lonely when youâre doing it together.Â
âHow did youâŚâ Lisa trails off, but she doesnât finish.
She falls silent, clearly hearing the screaming in your head too.
Youâre outside a second later, carefully closing the door behind you. Carefully severing the rest of your relationship with Jungkook, until all that is left is the memories.
You take a step back, looking at the door, thinking he might open, might come see you.
Thinking he might be your home after all.
But he doesnât, the door staying stubbornly closed. You get the message - your souls were never meant to merge. The songs that you thought were about him, about you, about the two of you together, they were never about you. You were never meant to lie down and forget the world with him.Â
Or maybe you were, but it came with an expiration date.
You reckon you and Jungkook have always had an expiration date. You just forgot tonight, became blind to it thanks to false, treacherous hope. And so you leave, walking down the stairs as you blink away the tears that are clinging to your waterline.
You embrace the heartbreak, let it sweep through you until you think itâs all youâve ever known. And like a true companion, the heartbreak carries your steps through the night.
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do I feel bad for the amount of angst I wrote into this story? Maybe a little. I promise one day things will get better for these two, but in the meantime, what did you guys think?
All rights reserved to @/oddinary4bts, 2024. Do not copy, repost or translate.
#chasing cars ch 13#jungkook smut#jungkook angst#jungkook fluff#jungkook x reader#jungkook x you#jungkook fic#jungkook#jjk smut#jjk angst#jjk fluff#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk fic#jjk#jeon jungkook#btswritersclub#chasing cars#chasing cars series
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