#you can't just DIE now
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so yeah guess who finally caught up on the dragon prince and slipped right back into viravos hell?? this bitch right here
#I wish I had been into it when season 4 and 5 dropped#but hey at least I can wait in anticipation for season 6 with the rest of the fandom yay#viren better not die right at the start tho#I know he said he's done with aaravos but dude i don't think he's done with you and neither is your daughter!!#you can't just DIE now#tdp#chi talks
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i love getting to see day one expac launch bugs such as "eating pizza breaks male au ra faces" and "syrcus tower now has savage level difficulty mechanics"
#ffxiv#chattering#dawntrail#the amon thing is soooooo funny to me#to non ffxiv players: essentially there's a bug right now#where a Very Essential Mechanic just. doesnt work#said Very Essential Mechanic is important to shield players from an instakill raidwide attack#so the entire party is just immediately wiped#and unless you get the entire party of 24 strangers to work together#(let healers die first rez then wait to accept during instakill)#you literally can't finish the raid#this is one of the lowest level raids available btw.#its so funny to me
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being aromantic is like. hey btw you're going to live a life that is the culmination of most of society's worst nightmares. sorry lol ✌️ but then you turn around and take a really good hard look at it and it turns out that living in that nightmare is fucking awesome and you get to wake up every day and take that fear that other people have and laugh and hold it close until it's a great joy for you instead. and being happy is a radical act that you define instead of someone else. and you're sexy as fuck that's just a fact of life i don't make the rules on that one
#aromantic people are just sexy i'm not making the decisions here it's just facts#course ur hot as fuck. it came free with the aromanticism#being sexy is just default settings for aromantic people 👍#hope this all helps. anyway i'm on my 'i hope i die alone <3 i can't wait to die alone <3' kick rn#i think the existential fear that people have of Not Partnering specifically is so. well.#obviously that shit is strong and it is SO awesome to be free of it.#realizing you're aro and you don't Want a partner can be such a hit to the solar plexus#cause society says that's the only thing that'll make you happy. so either you go without that thing or you force yourself#into doing something you don't want which would make you unhappy anyway.#so you think it's a lose lose situation and you have to come to terms with what amatonormativity presents as the worst possible situation#but then! whoa! turns out personhood is inherently valuable in and of itself and romantic partnering is just a construct!#and that nightmare is now your life to do with as you please... define as you will... structure as you want...#best case scenario. is what i'm saying.#every day i wake up ready to spit all that amatonormative rhetoric back in life's teeth by being alone and being happy#and it's so fucking satisfying. every day.#fucking JUBILANT being by myself. and i love being a living breathing 'fuck you' to the romantic system#you need a partner to be happy? oh that's sooo fucking crazy guess i'll go be miserable then. in my perfect fucking dream life lmao#yeah obviously it's the worst possible outcome on earth to die without a partner. so terrible. can't wait for it :)#aromantic#aromanticism#aro positivity#aroace#arospec#sorry to bitches who are sad about not having a partner. i could not give a fuck though get better soon#you couldn't EVER pay me enough to go back to a mindset in which my inherent value wasn't enough by myself.#FUCK that shit. absolutely miserable and a bad life outlook in general. like genuinely do the work w/ amatonormativity and get better#life is something that can be so fulfilling whether someone wants to kiss you or whatever or not#i'm on antidepressants and i have people i care deeply about. what the fuck would i need a partner for lmao
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genuinely if you are scared: DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. if you are angry: DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. if you are sad: DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.
this isn't just a mantra of "nothing will change if we do not persist and act", although that's true. nothing will change if we do not act. this is just also a mantra of "frequently the best way to counter despair is to simply take an action, any action at all". it is hard to feel despair when you are moving. it is hard to feel hopeless when you are moving. but you've gotta start moving first. you've gotta.
#uspol#this ESPECIALLY goes if you're like me and in a privileged position#you have the ability to Do. so you should.#and i can't overstate that this also applies outside of politics. whenever you're at your lowest. find a way to Do#and if you can Do you will feel better.#this will be the last i say of it since i know people largely come here for mcyt stuff and needing that escape is also fine#i just. now is not the time to roll over and die. now is the time to act.#and you will find in acting that you no longer want to roll over and die.
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the pause tom has to take before he tells ken and rome they're doing chest compressions...
#tom wambsgans#succession#succession spoilers#that brief glimpse of a thousand-yard stare in his eyes before he packs it away#he just saw a man die in front of him and now he has to guide that man's children into this new reality#logan is far beyond cpr and tom is well aware. but he offers what kindness he can - 'i'll put you next to his ear so he can hear you'#logan is already gone. he can't hear those final words.#instead it's just tom - kneeling next to a body and listening to the cries of logan's children as they break#is it really any wonder he cried on the phone with greg after this?#linds original
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percy needs to be haunted by bianca's ghost more
#percy jackson#bianca di angelo#she doesn't even have to do it herself#he is just trapped in the horror of watching someone die and never recovering from the guilt that follows#like i thin we should talk more about how she was the first permanent death of the series and the first death he really witnessed#i think he should be more deranged by it tbh#painfully devoted to nico's health and happiness in a way that skips the border of unhealthy and jumps straight into fucked up#even better if bianca doesn't care. and nico has moved on. so the only person who is stuck in this void of misery about it is percy#and he can't emerge. no matter what he does no matter the time that passes she is always there in the back of his mind#a reminder of the first time he failed to protect someone else.#a reminder of his selfishness. his inability to follow through on promises. of his powerlessness. his uselessness.#in tbotl he finds out that nico doesn't care about him or his soul. he doesn't want percy dead. and percy is weirdly gutted by this#he needs nico to hate him and it freaks him out that nico doesn't. he's clearly upset but percy isn't centered in it the way you'd think.#nico has his own mission and percy is barely a side note in it and he's so bothered by that. it drives him up the wall#how selfish is it to be upset with someone for not hating you because you got their sister killed?#he hates himself so much. he wants to die so bad. but he can't. he has to keep going. for nico. for bianca. he doesn't have a choice#happy talks pjo#okay it is 3:36am and i am. going to try to sleep now
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what is the theory that ivan manipulated the event where till and mizi met the wagyein?
It's not a theory, actually! It's confirmed that Ivan orchestrated the whole event. The true reason as to why however is still unknown. The information provides more context to this scene, though:
During the earlier times of ALNST the most rational explanation for this scene was that Till ran after a flower crown (presumably Mizi's) and Ivan followed him in out of curiosity. Now we know that Ivan was conveniently just standing there because he was waiting.
Side note, I find it heartbreaking (and maybe a little funny, sorry) that Till most likely didn't notice Ivan in this scene. That's just like him, isn't it. Always too busy running after Mizi while Ivan trails behind, an ever-present shadow.
I'm not sure how Ivan manipulated the circumstances for both of them to end up there, but it is confirmed that everything was intentional. What strikes me most is how they describe this particular scene:
I can't copy down what they said word-for-word (Patreon info), but they described Ivan watching "creepily" as Till and Mizi are faced with danger. We know that Ivan was familiar with the Cerberus wagyein beforehand, enough to touch its teeth and even to rest himself inside its maw. To Ivan, the wagyein is not dangerous, but to Till and Mizi, it could be. Ivan prepared the wagyein, led them there, and watched "creepily" from afar as Till fell on his knees, seemingly injured.
The closest I can get to making sense of Ivan's "scheme" is that he wanted to see how other children would react in a dangerous situation. Ivan's always been an observer, after all, and he's learned to survive by copying the more "normal" behaviors of his peers. This situation occured when Ivan was still young and had not yet developed his more charming mask, so perhaps he staged this encounter to study a situational response, to learn and mimic the emotion of fear. And what better subjects for the experiment than two of the most expressive and reactive humans of their batch? It helps that he was already fixated on Till beforehand, too. I think Ivan became irreversibly obssessed after this incident, especially since it's framed as a turning point in Ivan's life, comparing Till to the stars.
This is just my attempt at an interpretation, though. It could very well be for another reason. He most likely chose Till and Mizi specifically for personal reasons, not just for reaction. I'm still not sure on the purpose behind the whole thing.
The team wanted to capture Ivan's "dark emotions" through the shot of his stalking, which could relate to his more sinister intentions. His gaze can be read in a few different ways, though. Curiosity, interest, fear, etc. Maybe that's why they decided to redraw the shot in ROUND 6.
I think this better sells the feeling they were trying to convey.
#ivan u fucked up little guy.#also okay i just wanna clear this up#i know i make a lot of posts about ivans darker side and his more problematic traits#but this isn't me trying to villainize him or reduce him down to “toxic yaoi”#I HOPE YOU GUYS KNOW ALL MY TOXIC YAOI POSTS ARE LIGHTHEARTED.#i just want to clarify that ivan was always intended to be a darker and complicated character. even since his debut in round 3#the way i refer to ivan (“twisted” “creepy” “obssessive” etc) are literally the direct words used by q and v themselves to describe him#but despite that id like to emphasize that i don't see ivan as a villain or a completely bad person. hes complicated#there is no normalcy in this world they are living in. none of the characters know what being truly normal is#this isn't me condoning his actions#but it has to be acknowledged that alnst is fucked up in nature. we can't expect perfect relationships from people who are born to die#plus ivan has a lot more layers past the “dark” parts. he's constantly battling himself and his desires#especially at the end of round 6 where he performs a myriad of conflicting actions (kiss strangle peck smile)#thanks to the r6 production notes we now know that ivan was going through a rapid internal conflict#“sure and unsure at the same time”#there is sooo much to ivan. his low self-esteem. his desire and possessiveness despite knowing till will never love him#his VEHEMENT insistence that till will never love him vs his desperate persistence in trying anyway#uh i need to shut up i think#anyways sorry. just wanted to clarify my thoughts on him in case people think im. yk.#in short. hes a fucked up little freak and he fascinates me. this poor tragic child. i love him.#SORRY I GOT CARRIED AWAY#alnst#alien stage#alien stage ivan#alnst ivan#asks
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THEY BROUGHT BABY TO THE BATTLE?? THEY ARMOURED BABY??? THEY EXPECT ME TO SEND BABY TO FIGHT?????
^ my face when I discover they expect me to send baby to fight
#NO. NO#YOU SEND BABY BACK TO CAMP RIGHT NOW#bg3 spoilers#bg3#I understand he's all grown up and he's an owlbear and wants to fight and kill and maim etc I'm very proud of him#but in the middle of all the MIND FLAYERS?? with the NETHERBRAIN???? no. just no#he'll lose health and die so so fast and I will simply enter into a bottomless pit of depression. we can't have that#oc.nawen#sleep.txt
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ghost stares at the ceiling, chest heaving in a harsh pant; sweat ice on his clammy flesh and soaked into the sheet he restlessly kicks away.
ears still ringing, his fingertips blindly drift down to trail along his vivisection scar. he half-expects blood to smear in their wake. his own line of solomon, who ordered him split in twain; half of him given to a grieving mother and half left with the grieving to be.
just for both his broken halves to be rejected.
what did it make him that his mother grieved him more than she loved him? that she begged to be relieved of him more adamantly than she begged to receive him? why did his worth spill out with his drawn blood? why was his pain lesser than hers?
his hand flexes, digging into the raised scar like it’ll part beneath his fingertips to plunge into his mangled insides. no one knows the cruelty of reforming the halved; his name, his being, not nearly as important as his body when he was stripped from himself. no one knows the pain of healing and understanding losing pieces of yourself means losing your value along with them.
how many more pieces did he have to lose before he was halved once more? before his very presence incurred grief so strong it was better to be rid of him than cradle his bloodied remains?
did the infant fight himself? did he age always at odds with himself; his halves never truly whole? he hopes he wasn’t, that he was spared the loss of self; the fear that one may be welcomed over the other.
who will he lose when the inevitable comes? when he’s ripped apart again? simon? or ghost? is it better to be cursed with choice just like his mother or live with an aftermath chosen for him? does it matter if in the end, he convinces himself there was nothing of him left to lose?
his head lolls to the side and the wild buck of his chest slows. he watches johnny beside him, his face lax with the rare peace of sleep; his cheek squished against the pillow, his lips pursed as long breaths escape him.
johnny. soap. never torn asunder but two all the same.
he carefully reaches out and ghosts his fingers along the jagged scar on his chin. even in sleep, he presses into his bloodied touch. he’s never fled his half-flesh, never shies away from his gore as it spills unbidden from his cleaved torso. he holds on where his mother let him go; cups his stomach to hold his insides in place and never minds the blood that drips through his fingers.
simon will never let him become his own solomon and cannibalise himself. he will never let him question which half of him has more value; which pieces he can afford to lose before he’s cast aside.
ghost’s soap. simon’s johnny. his.
whole, in any incarnation.
#yall know the story of king solomon?#and the two mothers who claim a baby is theirs so he orders the baby cut in half so they can each have half of him?#well guess what woke me up out of a dead sleep and demanded to be written?#anyway roba showing simon clips of his mum on the news begging for the safe return of her boy#for the government to do something; /anything/ please she just wants her son back#just for ghost to dig himself out of simon's coffin and she can't bear to look at the man he's become#he's cold and afraid and hesitant and angry and in pain and so different from her little boy that it's just too difficult for her#he's a living breathing reminder that her simon didn't come back from the desert#and ghost has to live with the knowledge that his mum couldn't love him through anything#that maybe if he got himself out sooner if he was stronger or smarter or a better soldier... if he hadn't let simon die...#maybe he wouldn't have changed so much that she wouldn't look him in the eye and see a stranger#if you know anything about me by now you know i love the separation of the self and the person they become around others or bc of trauma#whether thats hizashi and present mic or simon and ghost its one of my absolute favourite tropes#and simon knowing hes become someone else and going home expecting to still be loved anyway?#just for this new version of himself to be rejected?#thats the moment he fractures into ghost#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#we’re a team. ghost team#simon ghost riley#ghost cod#john soap mactavish#soap cod#soapghost#ghostsoap#ghoap#ghost call of duty#cod mw2#cod mwii#save post
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you don't have to forgive yourself for what you did. but you can't hate yourself about it forever. learn, change, do better in the future and try to make that matter. there will always be people who will only know you from your worst. that does not preclude that you can change and become a better person.
#if you see this and think this is about you: this is. arent you just as tired.#cant we just let ourselves both acknowledge that our lives will be better if we can both move on from how we hurt each other.#cant it be possible for us both to think that it's been years and we aren't willing to be who we were to each other anymore.#if you see this will you be willing to sit down with me and we can actually listen to each other for once.#i can't be the only one who feels this way by now. i can't believe that you aren't willing to genuinely figure something out.#i want to be a different person than i was. i want to continue being different. i want us both to become unrecognizable.#do you feel at all similarly or will we just have to have wounds about it until we die.
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I love the little hat emoji people use to represent luffy, the android version has a pretty purple bow 👒
#one piece#luffy#monkey d. luffy#fooldles#experiencing the art horrors right now but the urge to draw him grabbed me by the neck and threw me through a window#anything for you pirate king#EDIT: I FIXED HIS HAND OH MY GOD I CAN'T BELIEVE IT WAS BACKWARDS#THANK YOU ANON FOR TELLING ME#haha i mean whhattt??? it was like this the whole timeeeeee#i don't think deleting a post will always delete the reblogs so i'm just editing#backward hand luffy will haunt me until i die BUT LESSON LEARNED
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SUPERSTAR SAGA YOU CAN'T JUST PUT ME THROUGH ALL THAT AND THEN GIVE ME A TIME LIMIT TO GET OUT OF THE SHIP BEFORE IT EXPLODES WITHOUT GIVING ME A SAVE STATE FIRST THAT WAS SO SCARY PLEASE DON'T DO THAT
#my inept panicking ''can't navigate their way out of a cardboard box'' ass was so sure I was going to die#and have to fight Cackletta all over again#I'm so glad that the time limit was actually very reasonable because that would've been so upsetting#''Piano you were playing on the switch you could've just used a save state'' I REALIZE THAT NOW BUT IN THE MOMENT I PANICKED#piano plays superstar saga
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#House of Ashes#Salim Othman#Jason Kolchek#so this scene has been giffed a lot but#I just wanted to really focus on their expressions here#my gifsets#can't get over how smiley Jason is here with Salim after being so serious/sarcastic the whole game#Salim saw a pop-up appear above Jason's head that was like 'Jason will now die for you'
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finally decided to pick up pokemon scarlet after so long as my first pokemon game and honestly having such a good time with it, the npc's are all so good and make the game so much worth it
#i love them sm#they're so funny#god i'm only like barely an hour into playing#but they have made this game worth the like 60 something dollars it cost#nemona??#she's so cool and great#i love a good confident character who just likes to fight#every 5 seconds going#“let's battle right now or i'll die”#she's so real for that#and also arven?#god he's so funny#i feel kinda bad that the first interaction you have with him is kicking his ass in battle#but he delights me#and also penny omg#i only just met her#but she's so cool#can't wait to get to know her better#loving this game a lot so far#arven pokemon#penny pokemon#nemona pokemon#pokemon scarlet and violet#pokemon scarlet#pokemon#random talking don't mind me
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I went over to my aunt because she had cake she wanted to give some of it...& then we started talking & at some point she said that she watched Deadpool this weekend with a friend. I was surprised because she is not a Marvel Fan. I am also sure that she could not name one character aside of Deadpool in that movie. Buty anyway she had fun & liked it & this is all that matters :)
BUT then she told me that some scenes feeled "a bit long. like when they where fighting in the car. This was long"
I was sitting there like "What?"
I had not the heart to tell her that they did not fight (well they did but not like fight fight) & that it was not to long. It was to short.
#maybe it is because i am gay...#but do people look at THAT SCENE & just think “Oh fight cool” & not see the implication of it???#I feel sooo sorry if you just saw a fight & not... two middle aged men who can't die dry fuck each other...i am soooo sorry...#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool 3#deadpool#wolverine#marvel mcu#marvel#the honda odyssey#poolverine#now i want to know what my dad was thinking about that scene...#i should asks him...but it would be a bit weird...
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i know for a fact i have made this post before but for me it's very important that bbc merlin is a pointless tragedy. it wouldn't be good (it's frequently not good anyway but it would be a lot further away from good) if it wasn't a pointless tragedy! it's simply not arthuriana if it doesn't go past the high point of the heroic/legendary/high medieval romance stuff and end with detailed rundowns of exactly how everybody got betrayed and died like that is what makes it real arthuriana to me and not just a silly show about a wizard
#'why did he die at the end! why did they make us miserable? why can't we have nice things!'#BECAUSE IT'S ARTHURIANA OKAY .that's what HAPPENS#if you're doing arthuriana you're not doing it right unless when you finally get to the end of this endless string of knight adventures#the main guy is like. dead and you're like well . what am i supposed to do now#like when i first read the great illustrated classic abridged king arthur in third grade and got to the end ofi t#and guinevere had been sent to a nunnery and half the nights had died in this battle or that one and merlin had been stuck in a cave#and then arthur dies and bedivere chucks his sword in a lake and then the book just ENDS#and i sat there consumed with emotions id never felt before. well i would've been disappointed if the end of bbc merlin had#NOT made me feel those emotions again#but it did. to me that is in fact its greatest success#merlin#q#like. dont get me wrong i like a fixfic as much as the next guy and in fact i plot them out all the time#but you cant DO that if the original material is. like. already happy#or meant to be
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