#yknow. the thing she got him for this very reason.

[luna-the-cretar]

So apparently my 12yo brothers school decided not to let him go home because he needed to finish an assignment, and Thursday Night School is apparently “mandatory”.

And here’s the kicker. The school didn’t tell my mom about the assignment. They didn’t tell my mom about keeping my brother at school. NOTHING. So they essentially kidnapped my brother by holding him hostage (since they FORCED HIM to stay), and not contacting my mom about it at all. So nobody knew, and nobody could’ve picked him up, and the bus had already long since left at that point.

I had gone to this school for a year when I was 13-14. It was shitty then, but this is so much worse. I know it’s mostly convenient bc he can ride the bus while attending this school, but i honestly hope she can switch him to another middle school that’s not nearly as bullshit as this one is (she had done that with me and my brother, after she’s had similar issues, as well as issues for the schools “no tolerance” bullying policy meaning “if you get punched, you get punished. Even if you didn’t fight back”)

[gemini-queen42]

Saw some eeveelutions poll and am suddeny overcome with the desire to assign batb characters eeveelutions...

[psychesalcove]

„ we both like apple cider, but your breath is smellin' like fruit punch

𝜗𝜚 jason grace x daughter of poseidon

+ platonic percy jackson x sister reader

synopsis ; you and jason had just started dating. neither of you were ecstatic about telling your brother, percy, about your relationship. so, you did the most reasonable thing two demigods could think of;try to pretend your just friends around him.

⚠️ ; reader is a tad dramatic ab how protective percy is, percy being a good older brother, not proofread, iris camper gets targeted bc i didnt know who else to put 😭, piper n jason didn't date in this fic, reader was kinda a bitch to percy (not in the end tho!!), don't go much into how reader n jason pretend to just be friends, reader is a tad out of tune with her emotions, mainly reader and percy centered, kissing, percy being incapable of doing his laundry, percy being a drama queen twords the end

requested ; yes, by anon !!

jason and you had only been dating for around two weeks. and it was rough. not being with jason, no, that was amazing. you had been crushing on him as soon as he arrived at camp with leo and piper. you had never been happier for your relationship change with him.

percy was the problem. you loved your half brother, you really did. but he has a tendency to be a bit overprotective of you and tyson. most times, you don't mind at all. it means the ares cabin tries to pick fights with you less, the hermes cabin doesn't target you as much, etc.

but, percy and you dating don't go together very well. you had only dated one other camper, a child of iris, before you both decided you would work better as friends after a couple months.

percy had been there for those months, and he was not a happy camper. he consistently hovered over you and the child of iris, never letting the two of you be together by yourself, let alone in your cabin. he got better the longer you stayed together, but the underlying protective side of him was always present.

which is why you're trying to hide your relationship with jason from percy. you know percy means well, but you learned he can be a bit suffocating at times. even though jason and percy were friends, you know he'll still get protective.

so, both you and jason had mutually agreed to try to keep your relationship a secret from percy until you felt comfortable enough to tell him.

༉‧₊˚.

"so when do you think he'll catch on?" piper asked you as she laid down besides you on her bed. you were having a sleepover in the aphrodite cabin, piper wanting to share the latest gossip with you as usual.

"hopefully after we tell him," you chuckled, flipping through the pages of a vouge magazine you found on the floor. "i know percy isn't dumb, but i'm hoping that with us not being all lovey dovey with eachother in front of him pays off."

piper nodded her head. "yknow he might not mind you dating jason as much as that iris kid you dated a while back. i mean, the two are pretty good friends with eachother," hehe said as she scooted closer to you to view the magazine.

you sighed lightly. "i guess, i just don't really know," you said. "i don't want percy and jason to not be friends just because percy doesn't agree with me dating," you countied, looking at piper for advice.

"babes, i don't think percy doesn't agree with you dating. he just wants what's best for you, so he has high expectations for whoever you date." she mused, giving you the advice you were seeking for, even if it was going against what you had said.

"and, that iris kid was not cute; i can see why percy didn't want you dating them." drew added as she walked by the two of you.

༉‧₊˚.

it was a couple days after your sleepover with piper, and you were laying in your bed in your dad's cabin. you had thought over pipers (and drew's light commentary) words and realized that you were being a bit dramatic for how percy acted.

it was natural for him to be protective over you, just as you were of him. thinking about it, you would have been weary of annabeth if you were at camp before they started dating. and, drew was right. that camper you dated before was not the cutest, and also wasn't the best partner.

which percy had probably picked up on; which explains why he was so weird with you dating them. suddenly, the idea of telling percy that jason and you were dating didn't seem that bad, now having reasons for percys past behavior.

him and jason were friends, i mean they did go on a world saving quest not long ago, and they seemed to get along just fine together. (minus when they fought over a chair, piper told you that as soon as she could).

and, percy was probably really confused now thinking about it. both you and jason had tried to spend as little time as you could with him since you started dating; worried that one of you would slip up and accidentally tell him. whenever you saw percy, you tried to walk the other direction, and anytime he said something to you or tried to hang out with you, you made an excuse of being too busy.

you were brought out of your train of thought as the door opened to the cabin, percy walking in. he looked like he just got done with training and taking a shower. his hair still looked slightly damp, and he wore his orange chb shirt with his cargo jean shorts.

it seemed that he didn't notice you at first, lightly humming a tune while walking over to his bed. he started folding the pile of clothing that was on his bed, and that had been for about a week now.

you lightly coughed to alert him of your presence in the cabin, causing him to pause in his humming and turn around.

"hey, you." he said. "you tryin' to avoid me in here? yknow it isn't as affective because it's also my cabin," he tried to joke, but it just fell flat. you sighed lightly, sitting up on your bed and making eye contact with percy.

"i've been a bitch to you," you stated. his eyes widened and he laughed at your statement. you rolled your eyes in response. "i own up to how i've been acting and you laugh?" you said with an annoyed tone of voice.

percy quickly shuts up and sits on his pile of clothing bed and mirrors your position. "i wasn't laughing at you, i was just surprised that you said that instead of something else." he defended, smiling over at you. "have anything else to say?" he asked.

"me and jason are dating."

"i know."

you stared at him in surprise. "you know?" you asked with genuine question in your voice.

percy chuckled. "yeah, i do. pretty easy to tell when both of you start avoiding me and i see you two sucking eachothers lips off behind the zues cabin." he mused, a hint of mischief in his eyes.

"and, you don't care?" you asked, still in shock with the information percy had just given you.

"why would i?" he said. "i mean, i know jasons good for you, i've seen it with my own eyes. he's a good person, has good morals, knows how to treat a girl right, i mean he might've been raised by a wolf but that guy is good." he says, getting up and taking a seat on your bed next to you.

he wrapped one of his arms around you and brought you closer to him. "i love ya kid, and i only want what's best for you. and jasons exactly that." percy said as you leaned into his embrace.

"but i also want you to know that if i do find jason n you making out again, the zues cabin might become flooded. just a warning in advance," he joked, but you wouldn't be surprised if that was a true statement.

you only hummed in response, bringing an arm to wrap around percy. "sorry i was such an asshole, i just wasn't expecting you to be okay with it," you said in a timid voice, not used to being so truthful with percy about these topics.

"apologie accepted," he said. "but, if you date another person like that iris kid, i'm gonna be the bitch, deal?" He asked, pulling away from the embrace and holding up his pinky finger, wiggling it lightly when you didn't move.

you rolled your eyes, but brought your pinky up to his.

"deal."

༉‧₊˚

it was friday night, which meant campfire night. after your conversation with percy, you had gone to the zues cabin to explain to jason your talk with percy. jason was more than happy that percy was okay with the two of you. (he would never tell you but he might have jumped around his cabin and im'd thalia as soon as he could to tell her).

jason and you sat at the camp fire, with the rest of the seven. even if you weren't apart of the prophecy, you still became friends with all of them; they like to refer to you as the hoary member of the seven.

jasons arm was wrapped around your shoulder, brining you to lean into his side as you both stared into the fire. one of the apollo kids was playing a song you didn't recognize, but it didn't really matter.

you were surrounded by people who you loved and who loved you back just as much: the main ones being jason and percy. both of them held special places in your heart. jason was your love, the part of you that you were always missing. percy was your sibling, even if only half, and was your partner in crime.

you saw jason make a quick glance in the direction that percy was in out of the corner of your eye. jason moved the two of you so both of you were face to face. he smiled softly at you and you returned the gesture. you saw jason take a quick glance down at your lips, and you got the cue. both of you leaned into eachother, lips softly connecting with one another.

it wasn't your first kiss with jason, but it felt like it. not feeling like it inexperienced and neither of you knew what you were doing. it felt like the first kiss because it was the first one that was happening with your relationship being out in the open.

all of camp had caught onto the fact that jason and you were dating pretty fast, as the two of you could be seen everywhere together: holding hands, kissing eachothers cheek and hands, and jason walking you to your cabin at the end of everyday.

with the warm fire and light storms of gutair in the background, it felt like you finally found exactly where you were supposed to be. you silently sent aphrodite a prayer in your head as you felt jason bring a hand up to your cheek to deepen the kiss.

both of you pulled away slowly, needing to breath for a moment. jason looked at you with such adoration in his eyes, showing nothing but his pure love for you in the moment. both of you smiled softly at eachother, jason bringing you closer so your foreheads could rest against one another.

as the song came to an end, a loud dramatic gasp was heard to the left of you.

"JASON MY LOVE HOW COULD YOU HAVE DONE THIS TO ME?" a voice, that you emideantaly recognized as percy, said. "I THOUGHT WE HAD A LOVE NOONE COULD EVER REPLACE," he countined as both you and jason rolled your eyes, pulling away from eachother.

percy approached the two of you as another song began, "jason, bud, on a serious note, you better treat her right okay? she only deserves the best and i'm expecting you to give that to her," he said in probably the most serious tone of voice you've ever heard.

as you watched jason give a salute to percy, piper and leo gave you a thumps up from behind jasons form.

[mysterycitrus]

combat skill ranking of bats etc? i feel like i know what order you'd put but i love the way you explain things

idc about powerscaling except for interesting narrative reasons…. so this will be no evidence only vibes. and yeah i really feel like my opinions won’t be a surprise at all + im not interested in arguing about it but in brief

cass — obvsly. borderline superhuman eugenics baby. i don’t think there’s any elaboration needed but what isn’t talked about so much is she can dodge bullets and outrun a speeding car so like. she’s gonna curbstomp any vanilla human

dick — i know people disagree w me on this and like. yeah bruce could be considered a stronger physical combatant but dick is also the only person who’s better than cass at something and we know he excels at crowd control. he’s an acrobatic prodigy from birth, he’s got a really good strategic mind, and he’s really fast. he doesn’t hit hard but he hits a lot. u can’t catch him if he’s flipping around all over the place then launches himself at u going 80mph

bruce (and damian) — i only rank bruce higher cause damian is a lil baby. i dislike the idea that bruce is thee physical combatant, even ignoring cass, cause frankly bc and wildcat and connor hawke and richard dragon should all be substantially better. he’s really good at ten things vs a mastery of one. anyway he’s really big and still light on his feet. he has a fun belt full of bombs. he’s super bossy

once damian’s older i think he’ll surpass bruce easily (and possibly dick too). everyone else im really so so about. i’d rank babs and tim just after bruce probably. people act like tims only ability is his intelligence when he’s also one of the best staff fighters on the planet and it’s weird. steph is down towards the bottom because a lack of formal experience compared to everyone else, but is still very powerful when she hits. duke also has less experience but an edge with his powers and training w cass. jason…. he’s deffo closer to the top but idk i subscribe to the idea that there’s always going to be some subconscious adjustment to the new body he’s stuck in. he’s taller, he’s very capable, he’s a master of weaponry. but like pretty much everyone else he doesn’t have the physical advantage that someone like cass or damian have. i do not believe he can take dick grayson in a fair fight. sorry. partially for realism but mostly for tragic robin legacy reasons, yknow?

[sh1-n0bu]

yknow what, im gonna say it

despite what most people/players say, genshins story and world building sucks ASS. the seven main nations are there yes and they all represent one thing or mainly representing one thing but isnt it weird how mondstadt, liyue and inazuma are very traditional fantasy themed with the whole super specific technology only the fantasy world has, the usual fantasy weapons, powers etc but then sumeru and natlan and BOOM! internet, dj, clubbing and all those advanced things are shown? isnt fontaine supposed to be the only technologically advanced nation out of the seven? dont even get me started on the whitewashing of sumeru and natlan characters/cast and the extremely racist undertones of the origin of hilichurls

edit: i was too angry when typing the first part that i forgot the main reason i wanted to ramble-

2) the traveler.

in the game/story/characters’ voicelines, the traveler is constantly alluded to be a witness to the change/shift of teyvat and its rebellion against the heavenly orders/celestia. even zhongli said it during his companion quest (i believe). okay cool, got it, the traveler is a witness— ay ay ay, why is there a backstory thing going on? wdym the traveler is meant to be a self-insert type of mc? you cant make a character a self-insert with a lore/backstory thing going on. you cant make a character a self-insert if they have a rich lore going on. make it clear already, is the traveler a self-insert AKA. stand in for us, the player? or are they meant to be their own character with story instead?

3) immortality/mortality

i dont know what it says on the chinese language dictionary but im pretty sure 500 year old survivor of kheanri’ah doesnt exactly translate to mortal, human, or hell, normal. idk man, i suck at math, but i think being cursed with immortality and living until ur 500 or smt years old makes you an immortal/inhuman

4) fatui harbingers

the MAIN reason i wanted to ramble in anger. from their very first introduction with la signora in mondstadt, you can already just feel that the fatui are a force that is feared all across the seven nations as both a diplomatic and military force. theyre elusive, sneaky, will not hesitate to get their hands dirty and their so called ‘diplomats’ (the harbingers) can and will step over the diplomatic boundaries to not only insult, but assault the archon of mondstadt. theyre a threat threat but now theyre just another laughing stock. if anything, they feel like a fucking circus.

at the introduction video of all the harbingers and the last act of sumeru archon quest, we are given the lore bomb that the first three fatui harbingers have a power to rival the GODS and had been quietly eluded that capitano had even defeated a god or two despite being a mere mortal. and that is terrifying, that is fear inducing. just the thought of a mere mortal like ourselves going tow to toe against gods is a terrifying thought itself and arlecchino has proven herself and set the bar even higher when she made an absolute fool out of the traveler during the fontaine archon quest. the next nation will have capitano, the strongest mortal, the first fatui harbinger, the man that could rival the gods and now ur telling us that he is not in fact a mortal man but yet another 500 year old khaenri’ah survivor? we get it hoyo, u love the number 500, but that makes him NOT a mere mortal doesnt it? and he basically got his ass handed to himself too. i am immensely disappointed

[chocostrwberry]

Just wondering, but do any relatives of Marinette remember her after her whole sacrifice?

Like they weren't watching the news at the time/were asleep when her & lila's final showdown occured, would they still remember her or is she like madoka & all memories of Marinette dupan chang got erased?

YKNOW FUNNY THING-

THEY WILL.

I haven’t really talked about this, but i suppose this ask is the place to do it.

Take Gina. She could have been out travelling when it happened. I have POSSIBLE scenarios for this:

Her miracle cure erases all evidence of her existence while it rebuilds Paris. Gina and other relatives would still remember her, but they’ll end up looking crazy and be VERY confused.

OR

The city ends up mourning this sort of “Jane Doe” and sets up a mini memorial for her to honor Ladybug’s sacrifice and commemorate the day.

Maybe a combination of both?

But I think Gina would be the one to tell Tom and Sabine that they did have a daughter, and connect that maybe what happened with the SentiQueen and Ladybug had something to do with the fact they can’t remember her.

In the end, even though they have virtually no recollection of her existing in their lives, Gina and other relative’s testimony (and evidence of Marinette’s life via her design social media account, her room, etc.) would kind of cause them to realize something isn’t right.

I think it’s like, the missing memory of having a child would be hard for them to deal with. Tom and Sabine have stories from relatives and family friends and baby pictures/family photos they don’t remember taking. Her family wouldn’t even know what happened to her too, so Marinette’s parents have to live with the fact that they lost the daughter they never knew they had.

Alya and Nino might have pieces of her scattered around, but they wouldn’t be able to connect it to Marinette. Adrien would have that feeling of losing someone close to him, maybe forever? But then he’d not know the reason why.

[bonesandthebees]

guys. we are missing out on the potential of an elementary school PTA au for qsmp. think real housewives kind of drama. quackity is the PTA president because he's old friends with a lot of the school board even though he doesn't show up to like half the meetings because he's busy. there's so much gossip about who the father of his kid is and he definitely gets judgemental side eye from the other parents about it. tilin is doing well at least? even if they do spend more time at roier and jaiden's house than their own sometimes.

bad is another other single parent but he doesn't get gossiped about because he always runs the bake sale fundraiser and does a great job at it so no one wants to upset him. bad and dapper are the type of parent child duo where bad keeps dapper up to date on ALL the drama going on with the other parents (to a child friendly degree) and dapper is going to grow up to be the worst gossip just like his dad.

no one knows what the fuck is going on with charlie and mariana's marriage. if you ask charlie they're in the middle of a divorce. if you ask mariana they're doing perfectly well they just got into a couple's spat this week and charlie is dramatic. what do you mean it happens every week? no no you misunderstood they're doing fine they're definitely not getting a divorce. literally the only thing they have going for them is how both of them went to bat for juanaflippa when she told them she was a girl it's the sole reason the other parents respect them. what's a more pressing issue is that juanaflippa keeps trying to start fights on the playground and instead of discouraging her charlie and mariana both cheer her on and give her lessons on how to punch people.

phil is one of the older parents and is already experienced since he has an adult child and wasn't planning on having another, but he's done the parent game before which is probably part of why chayanne is at the top of his class while also excelling in his karate classes, softball practice, cross country team, etc. missa is his trophy husband who's just happy to be there. literal "she's everything / he's just ken" moment.

yknow when there's that one mom in the PTA group who is very stereotypically attractive and everyone is convinced she was the mistress for her current husband and caused his last divorce? that's foolish. no one trusts him to be around their partners despite the fact that he didn't cheat!!! at the same time, the minute doors are closed everyone is trying to flirt with him and gets frustrated when he insists he's loyal to vegetta. at least leonarda seems happy.

jaiden and roier are like the picture perfect parents with bobby. he and chayanne constantly compete for the top spot in their class. both jaiden and roier work as lawyers and there was a rumor going around that they were representing charlie and mariana respectively for potential divorce number 3 but this didn't seem to cause any tension between them. roier takes over to lead the PTA meetings when quackity can't make it while jaiden sits in the corner awkwardly trying to keep charlie from getting into an argument with mariana again.

no one has seen spreen in ages. there's another rumored divorce going on between him and fit but instead of making it as public as charlie and mariana's problems fit just makes snide comments about his absent husband here and there.

tallulah transferred to the school in the middle of the year and phil invited wilbur to the PTA meetings so he could be involved in the school. quackity and wilbur are exes and while wilbur insists tilin isn't his kid no one quite believes him. he's a very young single parent though and clearly has no idea what he's doing so even if it's a bit strange that his kid is almost the same age as his little brother chayanne, the other parents are relieved that phil seems to be taking the reigns to help him out. also wilbur is a famous musician and he's gotten asked for autographs from some of the other parents of kids in tallulah's class.

dan and maxo only showed up to the first PTA meeting and never came back. trump transferred schools and no one has heard from them since.

[menlove]

wait enlighten me on the i’m so tired being about paul grind i don’t know if i see it

ofc! it's just interpretation obviously but it's one of those that makes me eye it a bit. but. it's one of those that every beatles wiki will be like "it's about yoko" but he's never said that and honestly the song doesn't fit with their relationship at the time like at all. she WAS writing him a lot of telegrams and their relationship was certainly getting Weirder at the time, but I wouldn't think it would inspired sleepless, tortured nights yet

the song is very much like. a sort of rising anger/irritation with the situation and the person in the song which is very much where paul and john were at at the time. I'm not a "something happened in india" truther, but I do think things between them were going south. had been since brian died and only got worse with paul getting engaged.

this part particularly To Me reads as very paul

bc at the point john and YOKO were at if he called her and was like "hey I'm in love with you and I'm going insane and can't sleep over it" I don't even know that HE'D be scared she'd say he was joking and turn him down. like she was very much the one doing the chasing there for a while and her telegrams seem pretty damn confident about where that relationship was headed. where they were at just didn't seem like the tortured, aching, harm that he talks about in this song. it was the beginning obsession of new love which is a TOTALLY different feeling than this song gives off.

paul on the other hand. I think it would be incredibly reasonable to assume that if he told paul "yeah I haven't been able to sleep because you're driving me insane, I'm in love with you, and it's like actually genuinely hurting me" paul would go "that's a hilarious one john thanks" like 💀 way more in character for paul to brush something like that off than yoko

also as just a further lil reach lol in the esher demo there's this:

obviously john was just misspeaking and meant to say my arms but. interesting especially bc at this point him and yoko had never slept together or been intimate at all. that's USUALLY something I'd call bullshit on with affairs, but they've been pretty open about their relationship timeline. she's also. I mean. yoko isn't very charming lmao I'm not dogging on her she just isn't and she knows that, john knew that, the world knows that. she's just a very blunt person who at the time this was written was just coming off as sort of strange and mysterious to him.

so saying yknow "when I hold you (/fuck you) I wonder if I should get up and lock myself in a mental institution" would again just be a really weird and nonsensical thing to say about yoko. about the notoriously charming man who in this scenario you'd be fucking, though.......... homosexuality was BARELY legal let alone smth john had come to grips with so this whole doom spiral around this person & fucking them & what that means for you, well! very interesting, anyway

anyway that's it! I just am super unconvinced this song is about yoko. and there's really only 3 sort of romantic interest options in his life at the time it could be about and it just wouldn't fit for yoko or cynthia imo. so that leaves paul. and their quickly crumbling relationship.

[crow-man9000]

sonic movie 3 thoughts (spoilers below for. literally everything basically + these thoughts are very sporadic)

I cannot express into a fully comprehensive english sentence how much I love this movie. I'm not even kidding, I think it's one of my favourite movies... ever! it tops raggedy ann and andy, it tops nimona, it tops deadpool and wolverine, it tops the mario movie, and dare I say my sam and max spinterest may get drowned out because of this movie... I'm never leaving this fandom tho. I am chained here LMAOOO

I absolutely ADORED all the scenes with shadow and maria! the movies highlighted their relationship perfectly, and I loved how shadow and maria looked up at the stars instead of looking down on earth on the ark because well. yknow. points to the arc-shaped hole in the movie. when she died I kinda felt like that video of that hazbin hotel fan crying over angel dust but um! we don't need to talk about that ^_^

also I fucking HATED gerald. I know we're supposed to but like I wanted to punch through the movie screen and choke him istg HE PISSES ME OFFFFF RAAAAAAAAAAAH

ok. normal now I swear. the chao garden! I loved the chao garden, and when team sonic all wears those chao mascot heads 😭😭😭 THEY LOOKED SO STUPID (SLASH POS) I LOVE THEM

also they said. a lot of things a lot of times. half of the time I was telling my mum "THE FUNNY HEDGEHOG SAID THE THING!" even though she has no idea what the fuck I'm talking about LMAOOOO. especially when sonic said "ok hot topic" I know it was in the trailers but I did not expect a snapcube reference

THE MOON SCENE. I AM NOT KIDDING I HAD MY JAW WIDE OPEN. AND THEY ADDED LIVE AND LEARN??? YOU PESKY FILM MAKERS I THOUGHT THEY WEREN'T GONNA BE IN THE MOVIE BUT YOU GOT MEEE YOU GOT ME GOOOOOOD. that scene was genuinely majestic, when the sun rises over the two of them and then shadow grabs his hand and they go super??? hello??? do you want me to go crazy??? (spoiler alert: I went crazy)

eggman and shadows sacrifices did make me a little upset not gonna lie... stone didn't even get to say goodbye properly :(( please let stone enter his villian arc next movie I think he deserves one... at least we know shadows coming back!

speaking of the next movie, AMY AND METAL!!!! I was straight TWEAKING when amy revealed herself. movie amy looks so fucking awesome GRAAAAAAAAAAAH I WILL GO INSANE!!!!! who do you guys think is gonna voice her? for some reason I can't stop thinking of movie amy as british? london being in this movie has corrupted me.... the british are invading yet another territory: my mind.

overall, this movie was so so good and I absolutely cannot wait for the next one! sonic 4 here we come!!!

no, not you episode 3

[ohbo-ohno]

I’m feral and need more of your a/b/o thoughts. Like I need to know your thoughts on alpha!141 snatching omega reader to keep for themselves

yknow i was gonna say that i haven't touched abo in forever, but then i remembered the gaz thing i just posted the other day lmao

(btw i wrote alpha 141 here but i think abo poly 141 would have alphas price/ghost and betas soap/gaz. probably. maybe. idfk.)

cw for noncon and kidnapping below the cut

i find poly 141 x reader really difficult to write outside of porn, since there's already so many interesting dynamics in regular poly 141. i have a hard time adding in a FIFTH element, yk? especially when that fifth element has to be a reader insert instead of some sorta OC or smth

anyway, i think the best dark poly 141 x reader idea is basically reader being used as a sex toy for the guys. like, she's there for them to relieve their stress in. but in an abo au i could totally see them using her as an element of softness in their lives. with 4 alphas in one home, you need an omega to soften things up a bit

and there you are. soft and sweet and small (compared to them at least) and just so perfect. you're the unlucky bastard who happens to smell appealing to all of them, and you're whisked away before you really even know it

they'd have to be sneaky, probably. you'd have a positive reaction to their scents too, so maybe johnny or gaz gets you to go on a date with one or both of them and then kidnaps you. maybe price or ghost just grabs you one day. something like that, i think, but there's much higher angst potential is kyle and/or johnny lulls you into a false sense of security first (and you know i love a good betrayal)

they'd push and prod at your instincts to force you into a heat before anything else. lock you in their den (soon to be their nest) and surround you in their scents, make low purrs to convince your instincts that you're safe

and as terrified as you are - and oh boy, are you - there's only so much you can actually fight your instincts. lets say you're either not on heat blockers, or maybe the blockers are weak, but for whatever reason you're very susceptible to all of their little pushes

they've got you knotted and mated by the end of the week

it's odd, coming up from that heat. your neck aches all the way around, to the point that it's painful to even turn your head. despite the unfamiliar room, your brain screams at you that you're safe, that you're in your nest.

it doesn't take long to put together the pieces. it also doesn't take long to become very very upset

thing is, it's too late to do anything now. you can't break a bond, and they're not giving you any opportunities to get away. you're stuck with these alphas who have performed the greatest invasion possible on your body and soul. it's crushing

cue lots of attempted comfort. soap and gaz would be the softest with you, always trying to tempt you into realizing how good it is to be with them. soap is rougher when he fucks you, but they're both equally soft outside of that. they bring you nesting materials, constantly make sure you're covered in their scents, and bicker over who gets to cuddle you on the couch

ghost isn't willing to coddle you. he's sweet (in his own right) but he's not nice. he doesn't try to make you feel better - you're meant to be with them, why should he apologize for making it happen? all they did was skip the courting process, this is always where you were going to end up. he refuses to apologize for that. but he also doesn't want you miserable. he holds you close at night, soaks with you for long hours in the tub, and is always making sure you clear your plate

price is... weird. i'm never sure if i should make him the meanest or a softer kidnapper. because i could absolutely see a version of price whipping your ass raw every time you scream at them and call them names, but i can also see a version of price who just levels you with a disapproving stare and locks you in a small dark space when you get like that

regardless, they all smother you. you help balance out their dynamics a bit more, but they're always fighting each other for your attention. especially with the bond making it so they always know what you're feeling. and your instincts scream to trust them (and you can feel their emotions too, know that they really meant for the best, as sick and twisted as it is).

[toomiieimagiines]

AHHHH HIIII i have a req >< its an akito shinonome xFem!reader so the're both at weekend garage yknow doing their own thing and akito is talking to some npc guy an then the guy asks if the reader is his gf and akito being the lovesick loser he is/j says yeah then he says "yeah ik what you see in her shes fine" then akito is like like that one shocked face emoji (i cant find it lmao) have a nice dayyy !!

𖦹 hii! it’s been so long since i’ve uploaded, happy new year! i could sit here and tell a whole sob story about why i didn’t upload, but i’ll save it! thank you all for the support!it really means a lot, and makes me feel appreciated!^_^

♪ kind of ooc, VERY poorly written this is a draft all the way from summer, i just wanted you guys to have something. they hate each other for some reason idk why but it felt fitting… i make akito have a sweet insert a lot so i guess thought i’d make her feisty

“They’re mine, yeah?”

Akito Shinonome is a total jerk! He’s sending you mixed signals, and it’s driving you nuts!

You can only stand so many chirped out “Don’t worry ‘bout it, babe!”s before you start to get the wrong idea. I mean, who does this guy think he is, talking to you like that? He’s your friend - at least you think he is - so the fact he’s treating you like some pretty thing is getting on your nerves.

Little did you know, HE’S feeling the same way.

I mean seriously, are you blind? He’s genuinely curious. He wants to strangle you every time you tilt your head like a stupid dog, and go ‘huh?’! You have to be dumb, right? That, or you’re not interested in him. But, if the latter is the case, you need to grow a pair and tell him, so he can throw himself into practice for a couple of days and probably also get into a fight with Toya over something that wasn’t even that important- God, he’s rambling. He never rambles. You make him act all weird, he hates it. You suck.

You two have been keeping up the whole ‘I wanna kick your teeth in, and then make out’ thing for a while, without either of you knowing. It would be funny if it wasn’t so Goddamn infuriating. Endless rehearsals of Akito having his ‘man-period’ (as An has so affectionately dubbed it) have gotten old for everyone. How many times can he make everyone run through “Echo” before the novelty is taken out of the song?

At any rate, this can’t last forever. Something’s gotta give eventually.

And it did.

It did when Akito was (basically) tied down and (basically) forced to stare at you while you (..actually) talked to Kohane. It wasn’t his fault, okay? The sun was hitting your face just right, and you kept doing this endearing thing with your hair when it got in your face- it was like you taped his eyes open! Maybe if you’d stop being so charming while doing absolutely nothing, he wouldn’t have to look like a creep! It didn’t go unnoticed by you either.

Akito kept staring at you, and it kept throwing you off balance. You didn’t know why, only having asked Kohane a small number of a billion times. ‘Kohane, am I talking too loud?’ before quitting and just letting him look. You must’ve done something to piss him off, what a jerk! You’re so sick of him being so immature! He should just man up and tell you when he’s pissed, not give you a dirty look- well, the more you look at it, it isn’t all that dirty. Why is he making that weird lopsided face? It looks dumb. You decide to stare at him back.

Akito jumps, quickly shifting his eyes away from you. How embarrassing! God, he must look like such a loser. He tries to act casual as you turn your head back Kohane, finally letting out a breath when you bring your attention back.

He has never been more thankful for anything in his life. Truly. He was feeling blessed until he felt a nudge on his shoulder.

Now, he wasn’t excited to mess someone up in front of you, but he wasn’t about to look like some pussy either. Thankfully, there was no need, the sleaze seems chill, but damn, this guy sure looks like a toolbag.

“‘Sup, man?” He says, and Akito winces. This guy's voice is like nails on a chalkboard. Does he think he has swagger? How dare this guy interrupt his borderline creepy stalker time? He puts on an annoyed smile, deciding he has to be a little polite.

“‘Sup? Need somethin’?” God, he hopes not. He’s no good at directions, and he’s worse at being polite to bastards with ugly haircuts.

“Ah, was just wondering, that one yours?” The guy gestures to you two, nudging him again. Are you fucking kidding me right now? For his sake, Akito assumes this guy is talking about Kohane - which he still wasn’t enthusiastic about throwing to him - and shrugs. He felt a little dirty telling the name of his friend to this slimeball, but if it gets him off your back he’ll have to live with it. And he can just beat the daylights out of him if he tries anything funny anyway.

“The blonde girl with pigtails? Her name is Kohane, and no, I’m not with her, but she doesn’t-“ He’s quickly interrupted.

“No, no, the other one. Y’know the hot one talkin’ to her?”

Akito’s eye twitches. How dare this guy talk about you like that. His blood boils over, and he quickly grows defensive. Yes, you know what, you are his, and he’s not about to let this slimeball think any different. He can’t believe that anyone would dare think of you like that. “The hot one”? Ha, don’t make him laugh. You are hot, sure, but you’re also a total brat. Does that weirdo know your favorite drink from this café? For fucks sake, he didn’t even know your name. You’re not a thing, but you ARE his. He pushes the man - yes, man, he’s sure this guy is grown - away, masking himself in half-playfulness.

“Yeah, back off dude. They’re mine, yeah?” He’s loud - louder than he’d like - when he scolds him. He obviously comes off as hostile because everybody (including you. confused and probably disgusted you.) turned to look at him. Ugh, how embarrassing!

You and Kohane exchange confused glances, making him fall further into the pit of guilt. Maybe he went a little far, I mean you aren’t his, so maybe you’d be interested in him- Nah, he acts like a slimeball, and looks like one, despite all Akitos flaws, he’s miles better than this freak, but he probably embarrassed you. The guy backs away in defense, holding his hands up.

“Hey, hey, don’t worry, was just wonderin’ I know what you see in them.” The guy pulls back, obviously not about to take whatever shit Akito was so willing to put on him. Smart move, because his nice streak was running out. The guy scampers away, muttering out his apologies. Oh great, now he really looks like a psycho. He’s gonna have to change his name and switch schools-

He sees you turn to him and laugh, God, he’s so fucked.

Now you, mildly amused, somewhat heartbroken, and really pissed off you, had seen this little outburst, and the “they’re mine”, and immediately assumed he was talking about Kohane. Obviously. You two aren’t together, you thought you’d at least remember that.

Your first train of thought as his self-proclaimed ‘semi-best-friend’, was how dare he not tell you about this?! And how dare he just lead you on like that when he had a girlfriend? What a jerk! You didn’t even have feelings for him anyway. You’re better than that! You exhale, trying to calm your heart. It’s not the time for this. It’s ‘semi-best-friend-who-hates-him’ time, so you prance over to him with a shit-eating grin.

“Damn, someone’s protective of their girlfriend! I’m heartbroken that you didn’t tell me, y’know. I thought we were besties!” You knock into his shoulder, giving a convincing eyebrow wiggle.

What the fuck? No, like, seriously what the fuck? Akitos mind jumps around in his skull, not finding a single thing to say. Do you think- Really? Him and Kohane? He lets out a laugh, rubbing his eyes in exasperation. You’re so dumb sometimes, really dumb. Cute though. Smart too. Pretty, funny, dense-

“Nah, no I’m- I’m not with her.” His voice finally comes out, and you’re hit with a wave of confusion. Not with her? If that’s the case, what was his outburst even about?

“Then why the crash out, huh? Do you like her?” You tease, stretching out the ‘like’. Your hands go back to his shoulders, jumping up and down. If you were to be honest with yourself, you’d find that you’re guiltily happy at the fact they’re not dating. You’d never admit that though. Not to this punk.

His breath gets caught in his throat, his pulse quickening at the closeness. You’re such a dunce, are you blind? Do you not know how he feels? As said, he hasn’t really been subtle about it.

“I- uh-” He looks to the side, struggling to find anything to say. Whatever happened to stone-cold Akito? Is he just going to sit there foolishly? He's embarrassed, to say the least. How is he even supposed to rectify this? Hey, I’m totally into you, sorry for embarrassing you in front of our friend?! “I’m-”

“You do like her!” You screech, still shaking him up. You don't feel great about it, sure, but it's still fun to tease him. He's still your best friend, so-

“No, stupid I- God, that’s not it! You're so dumb, I was talking about you-“

You freeze, and so does he. Maybe that was the wrong thing to say. He decides it was.

“What?!” You sputter, stepping back. Did you hear him correctly? There's no way… right? You know that he had been flirty, sure, but this? A real confession? It seems completely out of character for the rough-and-tough boy, and it really did come from nowhere. Unfortunately, your confusion only serves to piss him off. Where do you get the nerve to act shocked?

“Whatdya mean ‘what?’?!” He crosses his arms, obviously growing irritated by your ignorance. He stares down at you, wiping his palms on his pants in suspense. “Do you not get it?-”

“I just thought you were…” you trail off, fidgeting with your hemline, “so you're not with Kohane?” Your voice is reluctant as you ask, wanting to confirm it; confirm he likes you.

“No, I’m not with Kohane!-“ He defends, running a hand through his hair.

“And… you like me?” You point to yourself.

“Yes, that's what I said-”

“Oh.”

“”Oh?!” What is “oh?!”?” His voice comes out embarrassingly high-pitched, and it furthers the awkward moment.

“Oh. It’s just… oh.”

You both look the other way, trying your best to peek at each other's faces while remaining indiscreet. He wasn’t about to look at you while you embarrassed him. You’re so annoying.

Silence is something you two don't do very well when you're together, but it develops… in time.

You break it, you always were charitable.

“I kinda like you too y’know,” you confess, “even if you're kind’ve a jackass and you have bad hair.”

“I- okay.” He doesn’t dare to look at you, much to your annoyance.

“”Okay”? You got mad at me for an “Oh” but you give me an “okay”?!”

“Whatever, weirdo.”

“You suck, Shinonome.”

Kohane sees you guys holding hands when you three walk home that night… but she decides to keep her mouth shut.

[lanawinterscigarettes]

The Breakfast Club members at the beach

Warnings: swearing, smoking/weed usage mentioned

A/N: just got back from my vacation at the beach and since I wrote nothing while I was gone (oops) I decided to do it now

Claire Standish

Her parents definitely own some sort of vacation home on a private piece of land that she visits every summer (rich people things yknow)

Usually stays on a towel by the shoreline. She doesn't get in the water and if she does it's only to dip her feet in so she doesn't get her hair or makeup messed up

She'll flip through a magazine or something while waiting for the sun to give her the perfect nautral tan

Andrew Clark

He loves the beach but I think he spends more time in the hotel's gym than by the actual ocean since his dad's so strict about him staying in shape even during the summer

Totally the type of person to get up at the fucking ass crack of dawn just to run down to the very end of the shoreline and back. Man's crazy

Extra snacks must be packed if you're going with him because otherwise he'll eat them all in the first day of being there since he needs the calories

Brian Johnson

Poor boy's so overworked from school he has no idea how to relax properly, if his parents would let him that is

Even when on vacation he's still copying notes down from textbooks and flipping through flashcards for stuff that's not getting learned in school until the new year rolls around

He probably sneaks away at some point to use his (really shitty) fake ID to buy some edibles at one of the boardwalk shops to help him calm down some. The cashier is either too stoned to notice he's not twenty one or just doesn't care

John Bender

His reasons for going to the beach are pretty simple: weed and hot people (both guys and girls). Believe me when I say he can and will shamlessly ogle anyone he finds attractive when walking on the boardwalk

Pretty much all he does when there is get high. He has no need to visit any of the shops (other than the cannabis ones) and the beach itself doesn't interest him much

It entirely possible that he might just hang around the boardwalk the entire time, smoking a blunt while flirting with anyone who might pass him by

Allison Reynolds

She takes a couple different busses to go down there for a day trip as she doesn't have anything better to do

Might walk around the boardwalk for a bit, checking out the stores and stealing borrowing from a few of them, stuffing anything she likes that's small enough to carry into her purse

In the evening she sits on the shoreline with her sketchbook and doodles the sunset before heading back home

End notes: I promise I'm working on my asks and stuff okay I just tend to get distracted easily and forget

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[vladdyissues]

saw the ask about Immortal Husbands AU and realized i haven't dropped my messy fucking ghost marriage headcanons anywhere.

-Sam and Danny work out, they get married. they eventually deal with an amicable divorce for varying reasons, BUT, over in the Ghost Zone, things agitate, Danny becomes new Ghost King

-somewhere in the process of doing this, he and Vlad end up working together, and Danny tries to give him some sort of official title or position so he knows Danny is grateful for the continued attempts at redemption.

-oops accidental marriage

-"They think I'm married to Vlad?! WHY do they think I'm married to Vlad?! And why does everyone think it was on PURPOSE"

"Might have something to do with the kids you just made legitimate."

"The WHAT"

-yeah they're talking about Danielle and their dark future fusion living in a Danny clone.

-what do you mean genetically they're only Danny the fuck does that have to do with baby ghosts

-Sam finds it fucking HILARIOUS

-Vlad and Danny, less so, because hey actually they kind of have been craving a domestic relationship to each other for a long time

-oh hey this is everything they wanted in a relationship what the hell

-Sam and Danny had a kid, she is actually super stoked to have older (and younger, sooner than later) siblings who GET these ghost powers she inherited (and being a spooky ghost princess)

-Sam is never going to stop being amused by joking about their new relationships after all this shakes out

-Vlad was considering retiring to the Ghost Zone anyway so no one notices he stopped. yknow. aging. doing that while getting power AND domesticity with his family??? maybe he should have baby trapped Daniel earlier

-Danny does not think EITHER of them are as funny as they think they are.

-they very much disagree

ASDLKJFHASLDKJF I love this. Danny does exactly one (1) nice thing for Vlad as a gesture of truce and the next thing he knows he's got a husband and two more kids—and he. Kinda likes it. Fuck.

[liesmyth]

Ok so im antichrist gideon anon my bad i only noticed this rn.

Ok so technically, from a catholic point of view, alecto technically fills more requirements for being God than John does. Most relevant for us rn, the requirement she fulfill is the tripartite god (which im unsure is actually the term in english), ie: the father, the son, and the holy spirit, or alecto, nona, earth.

What does this make John? Lucifer. John was chosen by the earth for a task because he was her specialest little guy (Angel-era) fucked up massively, destroyed the world, got humanity kicked out of "eden", and even now torments their descendants for the same reasons he did then, is, technically, a False God, and depending on which interpretation of Lucifer's actions and background you have, actually does have similar reasons to John (At least regarding rage at the unfairness, him and his buddies getting fucked up for it, his buddies becoming "demons" like him, ie necromancers. Idk if lucifer was an environmentalist.)

Now, Gideon! As we have established in this allegory John's Lucifer, she does get the Antichrist treatment automatically, but she also has ascended to a place of social prominence, her showing up as John's daughter has coincided with stuff you can technically argue sorta relates to the Armageddon (the demons being released, the war against demons, the fucking possession stuff which may qualify as a plague) and she also distracts the followers of Actual God (Get in line thou big slut), drives them to wickedness and to harm others and themselves (Harrow, lyctorhood, their rivalry, the lobotomy), but she's also necessary so people can, yknow, get into heaven and for things such as the apocalypse to happen (Protagonist— I mean her blood opens the tomb and that's needed for God Alecto to wake.)

Anyways this was prompted by me stumbling across the term Lesbian Jesus again, pausing, and asking myself "Is she, though?" Which through this very well organised essay we have determined, she is not.

Nona is the one who's lesbian jesus.

this is a GEM of a thought to receive in my inbox I'm honoured you graced me with it! the part of me who was obsessed with Paradise Lost at age 17 loves your argument for Lucifer = John.

I think TM treats catholic theology in the same way she treats most of her influences, picking and choosing what to keep so but anyway catholic lore expert @monstrousgourmandizingcats get in here. do you have thoughts 👀 🙏

[ghouldtime]

Let me pick your brain, if I may. A bit self indulgent but yknow. What if someone breaks in to neighbors home and she calls König.

My first instinct for some reason was to call my boyfriend rather than the police? I don't know why lol. It wasn't anything dramatic, just a guy shimmied my door open whole I was cooking dinner, looked at me said "wrong place" and left. Turns out he was looking for my literal next door neighbor. We live in an apartment building.

I feel like it could go one way, he'd grab a gun and calmly make his way over. Make sure everything is fine then ask why they didn't call the police. If it's like the situation I was in. But what if it was the real deal dangerous situation?

If he were to go in ready to fight then his neighbor might question how he can fight like that or shoot like that( doubt it would get to that point but I'm leaving it up to you). They'd only ever seen fighting like that in the movies. I like to picture him getting a little flustered (kind of like the name situation) and just saying like oh I learned it in fight club or something.

I don't know that he'd immediately call the cops for them, would he immediately go in to protection mode and let instinct take over? What would his instinct be? I definitely don't feel like he'd kick the door down and go guns blazing, i think he'd be too calm and collected for that. Being a colonel he's gotta be good about keeping his head straight and clear, otherwise he wouldn't be here, surely. It's not a terrorist organization he's gotta take down, just a neighborhood thug that got a little lost and confused, so to speak. He'll help them find their way.

Also, picturing your König just absolutely crushing a bad guy in his usual civilian clothing rather than his gear and hood just does something to me. Being like "i am on vacation dammit" (insert the frustrated Ben Afflect cigarette meme here)

Also, petition to change the phrase "that wasn't very cash money of you" and changing it to "that wasn't very KevinKönig of you." Or "Ghoul's König would NEVER-"

💚💚💚💚Hey, anon! Hope you're doing well :D Oh geez, that must've been a bit perplexing and scary in the moment. I'm glad nothing bad happened and that you're safe! But damn that would've given me a heart attack and a half if that happened to me. The closest I had was my brother would invite his friends over without saying anything to me, so some dudes just walk into my house, not even knocking or ringing the bell. And I'm like, well, either they're the worlds worst robbers or they know my brother. This happened MULTIPLE times, I'm not even phased if someone walks in anymore (Word of the somewhat wise, don't be like me. Probably immediately question why someone is there and don't just be like 'sup') It reallllly depends on the severity and what happened. Anything like that is something that does need to be taken seriously! Seeing in the neighbor Au that they live in the suburbs, it's something that's significantly less likely to happen or to be a mistake there. He's a touch paranoid about things like that, and would even take something minor like that as cause for concern.

He's a seasoned private military contractor, he knows very well that people can do things like that or feign innocence to scope out the layout of a house or even to test the door to see if it's locked for a future break in. He's paranoid of that sort of thing even if it doesn't seem like much.

The second ANYTHING of that sort is mentioned to him, he's going to be concerned, even if it's brought up casually. Because not only does that mean you and your house are unsafe, but there may be someone in the area potentially looking around for him. So naturally, he's already going on high alert for himself - and he's increasingly concerned for you too.

Since he knows that if any bad guys or terrorists or enemies alike had any inkling that he was friends with you and you meant something to him, he's going to ramp up security for you because he knows associating with him alone is enough to out you in danger. Seeing what they do, he knows their methods, he knows how they use hostages and people close to others as sickening pawns.

He's going to be installing a security system for you if you don't have one already, he's making sure you're armed and ready to defend, he's offering his own tips on how to stay safe and to prevent home invaders.

Ideally, he would do all of that BEFORE a break in or anything could occur, even though the area is safe. Prevention and protection is better than going into damage control. Truth be told, he'd be ramping up those security measures the moment he got close to you - especially if he knew he would be deployed soon. He sleeps better knowing you're safe.

I'm just assuming either that wouldn't have happened yet or something went wrong - he never keeps his phone on silent, especially during the night in case he's needed. So the second he's getting a call, even if he's half asleep, the ice-cold adrenaline is kicking in. That's all he needs to get up and head on over.

He's grabbing his handgun, he's going to be scoping the perimeter and trying to pinpoint any vehicles or anything out of the ordinary that can be a crucial detail as he makes his way over. If it's minor and a "false alarm", he'll breathe a sigh of relief, but it's still something to be taken seriously. He'd much rather have you call him and it's a nothing than have you afraid to call him in the event of a possible emergency. That stuff is VERY serious and he stresses personal safety like it's his job (technically, it's part of it).

Anyone can go in ready to fight, which is his explanation! Adrenaline is one hell of a hormone. When it takes over, people can do absolutely insane things. At that point, it's protective instinct and survival being on the line. Very unlikely it would end in a shoot out or movie level fight, but his ability to clear rooms effectively and scan the house are uncanny. He'll tell you he's trained in self defense (not a lie) and he would ideally rather you be too. They have classes for it and being able to protect and defend one's self is a valuable skill - it's those things that can save you.

He won't fluster because he IS confident in that part of him and having confidence in those things can help motivate dear reader to protect themselves and can help give them a piece of mind. Plus, he'll be happy to help! He knows it better than many and it's very much worth it to reassure you and to give you that extra level of safety at all times. The world is crazy and so are the people in it, its better to always be prepared! As much as he wants to be there for you all the time, its physically impossible, so helping you help yourself is another way he's trying to make sure you're safe.

He understands why you might not call the police immediately in any sort of break in situation. Police response times can vary vastly and if he's right there, he's trained with a firearm and knows what he's doing - he can be the faster and is your safer bet. Those few minutes can mean the difference between survival and the terrible alternative. Yeah, call him. He'd much rather have that than wait around when he KNOWS he can do something. Not to mention, he'll tell you when you get close you can always call him for things like that.

Hell, if he's around, you can also just call him if you want someone else in the home when there's repairmen dropping by. The world is scary, he's seen the worst of it. Being there and nothing happening is significantly better than assuming nothing will happen and the worst does. It gives him a piece of mind for your safety and his alike if you involve him in those sorts of things.

OKAY ANYWAYS BACK ON TOPIC, IF IT WAS a serious, active invasion. He's calling the cops as he readies himself and scopes things out. Alerting them and having backup or SOMEONE else, someone aware, is vital. Manpower is needed, especially if it's a group. Not to mention, it's for legal reasons too. Courts don't play around and it's something that needs to be documented.

At that point, everything is muscle memory and adrenaline blending together. It's just putting him putting his mind back onto the field. He's trained in urban warfare and while this isn't the same, it's still fighting in a house setting. He's checking out the perimeter, he's trying to figure out how many there are, he's trying to get it all together in his mind as he enters. His goal, at that point, is protecting YOU. No amount of valuables or items are worth your life. Getting YOU out of there or keeping you in a safe place until police are able to get there is what is most important.

He'd rather not engage unless absolutely necessary because of the fact that off the battlefield, shooting someone is VERY very different. He'd rather all parties live and he doesn't want to jeopardize himself unnecessarily and certainly doesn't want to do the same to you. He's not going to try and find them to fight, that's the police's job. He doesn't have a big head and isn't some wannabe try hard who has to prove a point. No, he's focused on living and safety. Ideally, he's getting you out of there ASAP and safely far away.

If they want to put up a fight though, if they so much as try to raise a gun of any type, they're going to be eating bullets. Shoot first, ask questions later, he's not going to negotiate when there's HIS life and YOUR life on the line. He's not taking that chance. Talking things over and having a reasonable conversation went out the window when they decided they valued your things more than their life. It shouldn't get to that but he WILL pull the trigger if needed, no hesitation. Hesitation is what gets you killed.

He'll be in his oversized forest green sweater with teddy bear patches sewn on, with the ugliest flamingo print pj shorts on, but make no mistake, he's as ready to put up a fight as ever and is making it known why he's a colonel. In or out of armor, he earned that title.

Afterwards, when things are actually wrapped up and those guys are apprehended, he'll have you staying over at his house for a while - or a hotel, if you still feel unsafe seeing as you are neighbors. You can stay in his house as long as you'd like, he's got a guest room for a reason. Such an experience can be extremely traumatic and he's there to help you through it as much as he can. You want the TV on when you go to bed? Sure. Want him to stay in the room? He doesn't have anywhere to be in the morning, why wouldn't he?

He's absolutely committed to making sure you're feeling alright. He's not the best with his words but he'll always be a shoulder to cry on and will offer his unwavering support. He'll check your house whenever you feel like going back to it and will personally see to making sure any security measures are tripled and you have the best of the best there. Testing it, quadruple checking, and SHOWING you everything to help quell any fears and worries is just another part of what he'll do to make sure you feel comfortable.

If you need him to attend any therapy sessions with you or just want him around as much as you can, he'll be there and will be as present as possible. He'll always be checking in on you, making sure you're feeling alright, and will be clear you're welcomed at his house anytime and can call or text him whenever. He's honored to be a trusted individual in your life and someone you feel safe with, so much so that you referred to him for help in such a terrible situation. So he'll do what he can to protect that trust and cherish it, trying to make the most out of an awful situation.

[fuckyeahisawthat]

thank you so much for that excellent chani post. i've seen some annoying takes on twitter about how not making her totally devoted and subservient to paul makes her 'unlikeable' and i'm like. buddy. i think that speaks more to how you see women. than anything about her. this chani is very dynamic and interesting to me.

i'll be honest and say i've not read the books. this is me speaking from what i've seen of summaries, but i think giving her a real cause to fight for yet also genuinely loving paul gives her an interesting struggle, and also plays into how the portrayal of the fremen (seems to me to be) more diverse and nuanced. as in, the fremen themselves seem to have more of a push-and-pull to them. the clarification of how different fremen believe differently (the south being more fundamentalist) is a very important thing to include in a movie where you can run into the danger of saying that all adherents to a foreign, islam-adjacent (in coding) religion are all fundamentalists. that can (in less nuanced hands) be a pretty irresponsible thing. so showing that there's also more secular/pragmatic/less dogmatic sectors of the culture seems a pretty good counterweight.

so yeah. this is how i processed it as a movie-goer. and having chani represent that aspect (believing in people over prophecy, action over religion) and having stilgar as the humanized face of the southern peoples (showing that yknow, regardless of being fundamenist beliefs, theyre still PEOPLE with the capacity for love, friendship, honor) makes total logical sense. you're not just "telling" us that there's different aspects to fremen culture, you're SHOWING us by showing different characters who represent those aspects, without demonizing either or turning either into a one-note stereotype.

Thank you! I'm not someone who was a long-term fan of the books before the movie came out (I tried reading Dune as a teenager when I was reading a lot of classic sci-fi but found it too boring) but I did read Dune and Dune Messiah after the first movie came out, both because I wanted to know what happened next and because I wanted to have an opinion on how the movies worked as adaptations.

(book and movie spoilers below and also I basically ended up writing a whole essay in response to this)

My single biggest frustration with the book is that after they arrive at Sietch Tabr and Jessica drinks the Water of Life and becomes Reverend Mother...the book up and skips two years of the story and when we next see Paul he's already got Fremen followers who are ready to die for him and he's in an established relationship with Chani. Oh I was SO MAD when I got to this part. I was like FRANK. FRANK!!!! Did you seriously just skip two years of the most interesting part of your own story???

The thing is, even though I know that Frank Herbert's intention was to write a critique of the idea that oppressed people need an enlightened external (white) savior to liberate them...if you don't provide an alternate explanation for what's happening then you end up falling into some Orientalist tropes anyway. And because, in the book, we don't see the process of how your average background fedaykin comes to trust Paul as a military and political leader, there is nothing in the text to counter the idea that the Fremen are a bunch of unquestioning religious fanatics easily swayed to do violence by belief in a prophecy.

My second biggest frustration with the book is that we're given no reason at all why Chani would fall in love with Paul. While she has some memorable scenes, she doesn't have a lot to do as a character in the book, and she's missing from a whole chunk of the end...because she's in the south...because she and Paul have a baby, Leto II, who's then killed off-page when the sardaukar attack the south. (I'm honestly really glad they cut this from the film, because it never seemed to be given the narrative weight it deserved in the book.)

So you can imagine how happy I was when the Villeneuve movies figured out how to address both these frustrations by tying them together. The fedaykin don't just blindly accept Paul because of some prophecy. They come to trust him because he proves himself as a fighter, and because he starts out from a place of genuine solidarity and humility--which it is possible for him to do because he has no structural power over them at that point. And Chani falls in love with him for the same reason, in that heady environment of fighting side by side for a political cause, and maybe for the first time in a while starting to believe that you can win.

I think the Villeneuve movies improve a lot on what's in the book in terms of how the Fremen are portrayed...when we're with the fedaykin and/or Chani and Stilgar. There we see political debates and discussion and the fact that not all the Fremen think the same way. And we also see little humanizing moments of folks just hanging out, celebrating after a victory in battle and just shooting the shit and being friends.

I do wish the movie had extended this to more parts of Fremen society. If there's one thing I could have added, it would be seeing more of daily life in Sietch Tabr. It makes sense that when we're seeing things from Jessica's POV, she is more distant from and suspicious of the Fremen, seeing them as a force to be manipulated, but I wish we had even one or two scenes of people just being people in the sietch. It felt kind of weirdly empty and not particularly lived-in as a place, and I think they could've easily countered this, with scenes from Chani, Stilgar or Paul's POV, and that would have made it hit even harder when the sietch is attacked.

If there were two things I could have added, I wanted more exploration of the people of the south. Why are they more fundamentalist than the Fremen who live in the north? (We get one line about how "nothing can survive [in the south] without faith" but I wanted more than that.) While I think the movie did a fantastic job of humanizing and differentiating the Fremen we see around Paul, when we get to the south it does backslide a little into "undifferentiated mass of fanatics." Surely the people of the south also have some diversity of political views.

I think there are some interesting threads they could have pulled on in terms of how proximity to direct colonial violence shapes people's ideology. Sietch Tabr is one of the closest Fremen communities to Arrakeen, the seat of colonial control. They have probably had to mount some kind of armed resistance for generations just to keep from being wiped out. I can see that producing skepticism of the prophecy ("well I can't sit around waiting for a messiah but I do have this rocket launcher") as well as resentment at the idea of someone swooping in and taking credit for a struggle that you've put your life on the line for, and probably a lot of people you know have died for. There seem to be some generational differences, too, where young people of Chani's generation put less stock in the prophecy, while the true believers are mostly older. I can see faith in the prophecy coming out of despair--when you've been fighting for decades with no change, maybe you draw the conclusion that only an outside power coming to your aid will make a difference. While the people of the south are still under colonial rule, maybe being generally outside the reach of direct Harkonnen violence (the Harkonnens don't even know they're there) makes the concepts of both oppression and liberation feel more abstract and more receptive to being filled in with Bene Gesserit mysticism. It seems absurd to want more from a movie that's nearly three hours long already...but I wanted more of this.

Still, I do think they managed to improve on a lot of things that frustrated me or are simply dated about the book, while keeping the political thriller/war drama/epic tragedy elements that I think are the heart of the story, and in some cases drawing them out more clearly and effectively than the book did. The best kind of book-to-film adaptation imo is one that has a strong point of view in terms of what the story is About, on a large-scale thematic level, and is not afraid to change individual elements of canon in service of telling that story the most effective way possible in a cinematic medium. While there are always things I want more of, I feel like Denis Villeneuve really, really understood the assignment in terms of the overarching themes of the the story and he delivered so fucking well.