#yes people who don't want to transition are still trans

[dhddmods]

If you say non-binary & intersex trans people "aren't transitioning" or have an "easier transition", you are either ignorant or an idiot.

Socially transitioning is still a transition. Asking to be viewed as your gender (or lack of gender) is still a transition.

Changing your name, titles, or pronouns is still a transition.

Many perisex binary trans people don't want to physically transition either.

And also, non-binary and intersex people can desire a physical transition too. HRT, bottom surgery, and top surgery aren't limited to binary transitions.

Stop calling HRT "feminizing" or "masculinizing", and use non-binary and intersex inclusive language instead (androgenizing, micro-androgenizing, estrogenizing, micro-estrogenizing, androestrogenizing, micro-androestrogenizing.)

And yes, they are still trans even if they identify with their assigned gender to some extent. PLEASE see our other post about how being transgender is more than just "identifying against your assigned gender."

Stop telling non-binary and intersex people who are transmasc, transfem, transandrogynous, transneutral, transnull, transgenderless, transxenine, transoutherine, transaporine, multigender, or mixed gender that they are "not trans" or "not trans enough."

Stop treating non-binary & intersex people like they have an "easier transition" than binary people, when society is super binary-centric, to the point where non-binary and intersex people get left out, even in supposedly "inclusive" spaces.

[momett]

i think too many people on the trans discourse side of this site forgot the tucute vs. truscum debate and how it's a bad thing to use someones willingness/desire/capability for transition as a yardstick for whether or not they're "really trans"

[uncanny-tranny]

Social transition being seen (by some) as this super easy thing that isn't as hard as real transitioning (medical) is bullshit. Be critical of the idea that there are some trans people who just "have it easy" because they are trans or because they are trans in ways you may not be.

Social transition is just as difficult, hard, and rewarding as medical transition. Maybe it is not as hard for some, sure, but that is not the same as thinking that social transition is inherently easier or lesser. If you're socially transitioning, your voice still matters.

[ugly-anarchist]

I don't think you're a trans ally until you accept trans people who don't want to transition. And I don't just mean medically.

I mean trans men who look indistinguishable from cis women and trans women who look indistinguishable from cis men and they're happy like that. Who have no intention of changing their style, presentation, or even pronouns.

Some women don't look like the stereotypical idea of "woman" and it's the same for men. But they're still men and women. I need you to understand that gender has no bearing on appearance and people's comfort in their own bodies is more important than the fictional idea of what manhood and womanhood looks like.

And, yes, some people can't transition due to disability or funds or whatever and they're included in this, yes. But you need to accept people who don't want to either. Who willingly make the choice to not transition in any way because that's how they're the most comfortable.

A trans person who doesn't transition is just as much their gender as anyone else of that same gender. Please get that through your head.

To any trans men who don't want to transition or change their appearance in any way: You're a man. You've always been a man. You will always be a man.

To any trans women who don't want to transition or change their appearance in any way: You're a woman. You've always been a woman. You will always be a woman.

The way your body looks doesn't matter in the slightest, your gender is real and legitimate and valid regardless of any other factors.

[our-queer-experience]

Thank you for answering so many asks and reblogging so many posts from intersex people. We're probably the most erased group in the acronym, and I'm happy to see someone use their platform to bring attention to us and our issues.

I want to give a few general tips & things to know for your average perisex person for how to be a good ally to the intersex community!

Include our flag in pride projects!

Do not try to force intersex people into a binary like tme/tma or afab/amab. Even cis & trans. We're sick of it! Afab/amab should only be used to describe your own experiences, not other people's. Stop saying stuff like "amab anatomy" & "afab childhood"

We do not like being called biologically nonbinary and most of us are sick of that joke

Stop calling intersex animals trans! It may seem harmless but this is a mild form of erasure. Maned lionesses, male calico cats, antlered does, etc, are intersex! They are not trans! Posts about intersex animals may point people to learn about intersex people, which is a good thing for awareness!

Don't lump us in with trans people! Don't conflate transness & intersexuality. Yes there is overlap between our struggles but we are different groups!

Intersex people can identify as cis but our society will never see us as cis, we do not have cis privilege.

Do not listen to TERFs who call us "DSD", this stands for 'Disorders of Sexual Development" and is NOT the preferred term by the community. It's important to note that this is the current medical terminology for intersex people!! We are fighting against this label and do not accept it! We don't like "Differences of Sexual Development" either because it's the same acronym.

Not every intersex person has ambiguous genitalia. And of those of us who do, we don't "have both", we have something between male & female. And regardless you're not entitled to know what's in our pants lmao.

Use the terms perisex, endosex, or dyadic (they all mean the same thing, but perisex is the most recent & revised term. Endosex & dyadic are better known among older people) when talking about people who are not intersex. The same way you use cisgender when talking about people who are not trans. This positions intersex as a natural variation vs a deviation from normal.

Support intersex advocacy organizations like @interactyouth! InterACT is a wonderful group! As is InterConnect!

Most bigotry intersex people face is medical abuse, please recognize that! Many otherwise reputable medical sources are wrong about us and NEED to be challenged.

Do not reduce intersex people down to "cis person with a disorder" (like what the medical field does) especially in the context of the person in question being subject to transphobia. I see this so often with trans people saying "transphobia affects cis people too" only to show a headline about an intersex woman being harassed. Intersex people are an intended target of transphobia! It is not "transphobia backfiring on cis ppl". Remove phrases like "cis men with gynocemastia" from your vocabulary. Instead say intersex men.

PCOS is considered an intersex variation by the intersex community, but not by the medical establishment. If you are someone with PCOS, you ARE intersex due to your body's natural hormone levels! (You don't have to take up that label if you don't want to!)

I didn't know this had to be said, but do not say futa/futanari. I do not care that it's a popular porn category, it's a slur for intersex people in Japanese. It's the same as calling us a hermaphrodite, only worse because of the fetishization. There are better words you can use. (Ex bigenital)

YOU CANNOT TRANSITION TO BE INTERSEX! You can transition to have mixed sex traits, but do NOT say you are intersex! Please! This is co-opting! Use words like altersex, nonbinary or salmacian! Even post-transition, you are still perisex.

Please realize that we are being violently erased via the medical system. They need to mutilate us because our existence challenges the status-quo of bioessentialism. The only way a dyadic society can recognize our existence is as a "problem" that needs to be "fixed". This should piss you the fuck off. It should make you MAD. If it does, you're better than most allies. It's not an unfortunate "I'm sorry about that :(" this is a WHAT THE FUCK kind of situation. The subdued reaction everyone has to intersex people being mutilated and forced onto hormones is just so bleak to me. It's like nobody gives a shit. You never see intersex people because our dyadic society doesn't want you to. This is purposeful.

^^^ listen to intersex voices!

[charlie-ver]

Hey, you, the trans man reading this - I love you. I know there's posts like this, but I got down a bad rabbit hole last night and I think there's not enough nice posts towards trans men (:

I don't care if you've finished you transition, on won't be ever able to reach the changes you would like. I don't care if you've been on T for years, or just started, or won't be for some years, or can't or don't want to be. I do not care how you dress. I don't care if you want to be pregnant and have children one day. I don't care if you want hysterectomy and don't even want to freeze your eggs (Hell knows I am not freezing anything). I do not care if you want bottom surgery or if you love what you were born with. Because it doesn't matter and doesn't take away from your identity.

Gay trans men? You aren't just confused straight girls. You are valid in your gender AND sexuality. Straight trans men? You aren't a betrayal the moment you are no longer misgendered. You're still welcome in lgbtqia+ spaces. Because you're a part of our community. One does not lose their place the moment they are perceived and cis or cishet.

Cis men have heard it before, but they won't admit it. All this "if you like x you must be a girl" really just feels like repackaged "if you like x you must be gay". Wanna hear a secret?

HOBBIES, JOBS AND FAVORITE THINGS DO NOT HAVE GENDER.

I like botanical gardens. I love plants. I like looking at clothing, room decor, fabric stores sometimes catch my eye. Because I am am artist, and I take inspiration from these and many more things. Plant care and gardening is not a "red flag" for a trans man in my humble and trans opinion, but it's a sign that you have love to give. And that's beautiful. Just like liking these things does not indicate that a man is gay, it does not mean that your internal identity is any different.

Do not let the world put rails on your patch to your own masculinity. And if you have to hide, that's okay. If you can only be yourself online, that's okay. Trans people will always be here. Trans men will always be here. The best thing you can do is to live as safely as you can. I know this can come off as condescending from a European who has nothing to fear personally, except violence for one month in the year, because my way of being trans isn't "obvious", but I try to take it that my safety means I can try to reassure the rest of you, while you can just focus on your own misery and don't have to be strong for anyone but yourself.

If you need a safe place to went, come to my asks. If you don't want me to post them and just read them, that's ok. You can be angry, you can vent, you can cry, do whatever you need, but, obviously, no transphobia or anything (: Special love goes out to trans men who are of the aroace spectrum, because honestly, the aroace discourse never seems to die, it's just dismissed. Reminds me of something. Hm (: I wonder.

Anyhow. Come to me to cry, for a virtual hug, for a distraction, if you'd like. Feel free to ask for art. Want me to draw your trans characters with flags? I can do that, for free, for you. Ask or dm is enough (: Art and listening is the best I can do, but I'll do my best to do it well.

I love you. You deserve to live, you deserve to be happy, and you also are wholly entitled to cry, to complain, to be sad, angry, loud, afraid. You are a human being with emotions, you deserve to feel them. Nobody can tell you what your internal identity, what your gender is. Because nobody else can know that. Only you can.

So let me repeat: It does not matter how you dress, whether you are on T, whether you want surgeries or love your body as is, whether you are skinny, fat, or muscular, what accessories and clothes you wear, how your voice sounds, how you act, how you carry yourself and what you like. The only thing that matters is how you feel. And while we're at it, yes, you may change your mind, but it still doesn't invalidate your identity in the moment. There was a time where I thought I was biromantic, but I dropped that because I wasn't, and nobody gave me shit for it. Because nobody should. Whatever you feel right now? Valid. Do you identify at a trans man but don't use he/him? Valid. Do you identify with more genders? Are you maybe a man only sometimes? Or are you more at the same time? All of that is valid, if you feel like a man in some aspect or on some part, you are one, if that's a label you want. If your gender makes more sense as a man, then yeah, you are one. Nothing else but how you feel matters.

I love you, and again, I'm here for you if you need that. I can only listen and draw a little something for you, but maybe that's enough for some. If it can help a bit, I can do it for you.

Anyone derailing this post will be blocked. I have no patience for derailers.

[lgbtlunaverse]

Considering wwx's canonical breeding kink and his general fondness for dubiously safe scientific experiments it is technically within the realm of possibility that a few years post-canon he just invents cultivation hrt and transition surgery by accident.

He just rocks up to a cultivation conference one day 5 months pregnant like "I turned my body into that of a woman! Yeah the boobs too we travel a lot and don't want a wetnurse. I'll reverse it in two years or so." And every single trans person and egg in the culivation world simultaneously sits up and goes "wait what?"

Imperical to understand that wwx still fully identifies as a cis man and does not know trans people exist. He did not know he was gay while actively being in gay love, this man is very smart but he doesn't know shit. Just a few weeks after the conference people start coming over like "hey... that thing you did... can you do that to me?" and he's like damn sure are a lot of dudes who wanna get pregnant. One day a "female" cultivator comes and is like "so you said you're going to reverse it... you think you can do that on a body that's already female? Turn my body into a man's body?" And he just goes well probably, let's find out!! It's so great all these people wanna help him perfect his techniques, isn't it lan zhan?

Years later they run into one of the trans women he first helped and doesn't even recognise her as she's thanking him and after the clarification just goes "wow! haha damn you're even wearing women's clothes! Should I start calling you guniang?" sort of as a joke but she's like yes please and he just says alright nice to see you again ma'am (still doesn't get it)

[gin-juice-tonic]

As long as I'm still in this weird mood, there's a post I saw going around on this site a bit back that I'm not going to actually quote, because I think it sucks and is bad

But if you don't respect trans people who do not transition medically, if you don't acknowledge the pressures they face as a trans person to transition, if you think they have it easier, you deserve a kick square up your ass

And yes I did say pressure to medically transition. Yes its true cis people often pressure trans people to not transition, and currently the government is working on more and more laws to prevent us from doing so. But that's because they don't want us to be trans at all. They do not want trans people to exist, end of sentence.

Someone who steps forward and says "I'm transgender still, but not in the way people generally think of" is still going to catch a wave of shit from cis people, because they're still trans. With the added bonus of being something cis people aren't used to, which means their identity gets called into question constantly.

This is just the US, but:

States in light orange are those where proof of reassignment surgery is required to change the gender on your driver's license. A legal bar pushing trans people towards transitioning.

Even without legal obstacles though, I know plenty of trans people who lamented how they were not able to be taken seriously before they were able to get on hormones, or before they were able to pass. Even how it put them in danger.

It should not be hard to connect the dots then, that medical transition often feels like a requirement for trans people to live their lives, and that people who do not go through with it have a rough road ahead of them

They don't need an added wave of shit from other trans people who are supposed to be by their side.

[befemininenow]

My coming out as a trans lesbian. (A message to my followers.)

Yes, everyone. I am "gay", or should I say, I'm a lesbian.

This may come as a shock to some of you since I would talk about "hot men" and even make captions about attracting hunks and whatnot. If you notice an absurd amount of those kind of captions surfacing this past week until now, that's because I was dealing with comphet, short for compulsive heterosexuality. In reality, I do not like men nor am I attracted to masculinity.

Why until now? One, it’s because I wanted to wait for the right time to come out and it was coincidentally on Lesbian Visibility Day. Two, it’s something I've been questioning ever since I found out I was trans. This didn’t happen in a day or two. It’s been years and I would have thought I was just pansexual. However, I was not sure whether I genuinely liked boys or if I just liked their validation. It turns out it's only the latter and I was questioning whether I was really gay or just gynosexual. I admit that getting positive reception from them turned me on and I could see the kindness and affection they displayed towards other women (something that really made me euphoric). But the moment you would place me next them for more, say, intimacy (I'm trying to keep it PG), I felt that spark turn off. Don't even get me started when they're bare or worse, send me D-picks (it's so nasty).

Now, I've never did any of that IRL. But, I've tried to interact with them through social sites. Not just in Tumblr, but in other sites like Grindr. If you ever think of creating a Grindr to meet, don't bother. It's hot garbage! All of them were chasers and not a single one was attractive. Only one "guy" seemed to be "cute"; it was a femboy, who was commencing their transition into a woman. Those were the only men I thought I was attracted to, but the reality is: I was only attracted to their femininity, but not their body or intimacy. Femboys are still men and I'm not attracted to men.

That got me questioning: Am I really only liking people for their femininity or do I genuinely only like girls? To make a long story short, I've never felt so much better than imagining myself being the lovely girl... of another girl! I always loved women as a guy, but now that I'm about to transition, being into women as a girl feels so right for me! No more comphet for me!

I know this is not the norm on these kind of blogs as the majority tend to be attracted to masculinity. However, I do want to say that even trans lesbians exist on the feminization scene. That leads me to tell all of you for the next update: You won't be seeing anymore new straight trans girl captions after the first few days of the next month. That's why you saw those kind of captions bombard my blog these past few days. It's just my way of saying "Let me just get it done with". I'm actually glad you enjoyed them, but I just don't feel any connection to those kind of captions anymore. I'll try to upload them when I can since I've been busier than usual.

Anyways, I'm happy you read this very long post. Even if you're not a lesbian, I hope this note at least gives you an insight on not keeping your true feelings locked any longer. Everyone deserves to be themselves. You should too.

Sincerely, Nikki.

[my-castles-crumbling]

I am sorry to be a burden,

..

I don't want to come out anymore, I don't want to have surgery anymore, I am scared, and being a girl will only make my life harder, but, I need someone to ask and, my family hates lgbt...

Am I a girl if I didn't pass? If I look like a boy still? I am sorry, I am sorry but I just want to know, if everyone uses he/him still, do I still count as a woman?

YES

I need all of the trans, queer, lgbtqia+ people to read this and be very clear:

Whether or not you are accepted, whether or not you are able to be loud about who you are, whether or not you feel safe transitioning or coming out: your identity is true and valid. Nobody can take your identity from you, even if they physically force you into the damn closet, and you need to remember that you are perfect exactly as you are.

It absolutely is infuriating to have a country that is against your identity. But don’t let anyone take your actual identity away from you. You are so valid, no matter what some dickhead in power says, and I love you and am so proud of you.

[picklebunbun]

- DIFFERENT PEOPLE

˚. �� ۫ ﹏ ۪ drabble ’’ ˒ ˓ ᵎᵎ

୨୧⌢ Dazai Osamu + TRANSGENDER! SIBLING! READER

reader in late teens to young adulthood || NEUTRAL PRONOUNS || reader can be binary trans or nb

🕊️ ┆ summary ; Reader was with Dazai throughout his PM life. It was until Dazai and his sibling decided to stay was when he realized he missed so much of their life

"Too bad.. I want to stay here."

"..Here?! [DeadName] you can't be serious."

"I'm not going with you, Dazai."

"... Fine. Starve and die here. You're not my problem anymore,"

That's all that you remember of him anyways.

It's not like you cared anymore.

He said it himself. If you died here all alone, cold and helpless with nowhere to go, it wouldn't have mattered to him.

You take a sip of your bitter coffee, it contrasted with your past brother's sugary milk coffee. It was always revolting looking at it.

"Excuse me, Mx. Would you like more coffee?"

You look up at the tooth-rottingly sweet maid. She has a coffee pot ready at the go.

Your mouth forms a kind smile as you give her a reassuring answer

"No, but thank you, Miss. I'll take the check instead"

She gives a slight bow

"Of course! I will have that ready for you right away!"

You nod your head in conformation, as you watch her leave, your hand reaches for your wallet before she returns.

Suddenly, the door chimes indicating that more customers have arrived.

Well "more" is an exaggeration.

You were the only person there.

An obnoxious, grating voice cut in, releasing you out of your serenity.

Two other masculine voices interrupted the unpleasantly, raspy one.

"C'mon, Kunikida! Pay for us"

"There wouldn't be any universe where I would pay for a bottom-dwelling pig-nosed ape like YOU. You I AM NOT PAYING FOR YOU"

Geez.. I think he gets it...

Damn them, they just had to ruin the moment and come in and yell like they're drunkards at a bar. Screaming obscenities at each other like it was a contest.

You sigh.

"Mr. Kunikida, I think you should stop screaming at Dazai, we're in public.."

What?

What..?

Dazai?

Dazai..?

Are you hearing that right?

No

No..

There's no way..

Dazai is a common last name... in Yokohama.. you assume..

Fuck.. you didn't expect to see him here.

You always swore that if you saw him again, you would punch in square in the face.

Now you're not so sure..

"Oh.. right, my apologies.."

The so-called 'Kunikida' cleared his throat and sat down. Clearly embarrassed.

You didn't even realize your shoulders were tensed up until you relaxed them in relief.

The waitress came back with the check.

"Here you go Mx. Da- Oh wait! I just realized! You and this man have the same last name!"

Shit..

"Could you two be related?"

...

Could it be any more quiet?

"Ehm... Alright then, I'll just.."

The waitress ran as fast as she could to avoid the potential confrontation.

Oh god..

You fully turn your head around to look at your brother.

There he was.

In the flesh..

This shocked expression remained on his face, he knew it was you, he would always know it was you..

"You're... Is it..?"

"Dazai? Who are they-"

Dazai rose his hand up to stop the white-haired boy from talking.

"Dazai.."

"How.. When..? You look so.."

"Different? I'm aware"

Dazai rushed over to sit in front of you.

There you were.

The snot-nosed kid by his side was gone.

You changed everything about yourself.

He couldn't believe it.

He knew why you did it.

I mean, he's your brother, he's still the cold man you've always known.

He missed out on such a pivotal part of your life.

"[Deadna- or.. erm.."

"[Name]. My name is [Name]"

"Yes.. Yes yes yes.. [Name].. Of course.. I just.. can't believe it.. I never knew you were trans"

"I know.. I know.. I only just transitioned recently.... After you left.. I just don't know.. Maybe it was the fact that I still wanted to be the little sibling you always knew, maybe that pulled me back from my true identity"

Dazai stayed silent.

"Ah.. well.. I'm sorry.. I would've accepted you no matter what, even after I said all those things.. it wouldn't have changed anything"

"I know 'samu, I was just blinded by my own delusions. No one reacted as vile as I thought they would"

"Well, they're criminals, I don't think they'd care that much"

You both chuckle.

This was nice..

"Osamu, I-"

Your phone rung.

You groaned.

"That must be work.."

You started to get up.

"'Samu?"

"Yes?"

"Let's get coffee soon"

"Sure, [Name]"

[so-i-did-this-thing]

Hi!! I just wanted to say, you’re really inspiring to me as a teen trans guy who really just wants to be some dude.

And you’re really fashionable too!! I used to be way more into like, interesting clothes/fashion, but over time feminine clothing got more uncomfortable for me, so I kind of gave it up. Maybe one day I’ll pick it up again thanks to you!!

Thank you, and yes, rekindle your interest in clothing, it's a lot of fun!

Getting into menswear further helped me define what kind of man I am and what masculinity means to me. This self-reflection helped snap me out of some toxic masculinity thought patterns I started slipping into early in my transition. And being in clothing that makes me feel euphoric gives me a tangible confidence that other people respond to.

Anyone can do this without getting into the nitty gritty of how clothes work -- it just means making mindful choices about your clothes, thinking about what emotions they spark in you and what things they communicate to other people. (Dressing like a blorbo is a great shortcut, because you probably have already done this sort of deep dive with them.)

I feel like a lot of trans folks dress in order to blend in, and dressing to stand out more can feel very scary, but it's worth experimenting here, even if you only feel safe wearing certain outfits in very controlled settings. (This is why I love cosplay, what a great way to play with your look.)

And regarding the clothing I left behind -- I will likely never be the sort of man who dresses feminine -- it just isn't my style and never has been. I would probably feel dysphoric, too.

BUT, I still like looking at women's clothing and makeup from an appreciation and Craft standpoint. (Plus, I like looking at women who feel good in their fashion, ngl.)

So, if there's a part of you that still wants to engage with women's fashion, you can still do so! Women love a man who understands the effort and joy behind their fashion, and I still find myself bonding with women every now again over shared experiences (mainly from my teen years) with the more frustrating parts of presenting femme.

So, I guess what I am saying to whoever needs to hear it -- reblog the pretty dresses and makeup tutorials you find amazing, but would personally make you dysphoric. Don't make dysphoria close more doors than it needs to.

And get into men's fashion if it interests you, even though the "manosphere" likes to punish non-conformity. It isn't trans mens' responsibility to "save" masculinity, but we certainly can simply be more joyful and kind on a personal level.

Oops, that was all a bit of a ramble. Take care! ❤️

[genderqueerdykes]

something that ive noticed a lot as a trans man and yet dont see talked about nearly enough is queer hatred of masculinity/obsession with femininity (which also connects to radical feminism and all)

why are there more nonbinary afabs than amabs? because queer people are "encouraged" to lean towards more feminine labels (so afab trans men are pushed towards id'ing as nonbinary, and amab nonbinaries are pushed towards id'ing as trans woman)

why are trans women expected to physically transition more than trans men? because you cant risk looking like an "evil man" of course! so you have to be as feminine as possible! this goes for both trans woman and trans men

why are gay men stereotyped as effeminate, why are masc lesbians looked down upon? it all comes back to hatred of masculinity

(and on a more minor note, ive noticed a rise in trending queer songs all being generally like "everyone wants to be a woman" "a gross MAN will never be enough for women" which is... a little weird to me?)

i myself am a fem trans man, i love being fem, but its weird asf that we've normalized such an intense hatred of masculinity. i feel really bad for my more masculine trans brothers (and my more masculine trans sisters, for that matter!). i genuinely think this is one of the major inner issues of the queer community and if we want to grow stronger and have less infighting we NEED to stop hating masculinity

thank you so much for taking the time to send this, this is very well thought out and exactly what's happening right now. thank you for taking the time to highlight the main issue.

there is a queer obsession with femininity, yes. i see it a lot. femininity is prioritized over everything else to a dangerous degree.

people claim to love transfems and then do this- which as you said, forces them to come out and transition as fast as possible because no one wants ""Scary evil men"" in their community. it's sickening. i've seen so many transfems admit that life sucked for them while they were questioning because they didn't feel welcome in queer spaces at all. some have decided to never identify as a trans woman because of this and it sucks

there are also masculine trans women and trans women who never want to pass or don't try to (or may just never end up being able to pass at all). i feel like people are unnecessarily cruel about transfems and passing, as if that needed to happen within our own walls, too. like people are so fucking terrible to trans women who don't or can't or don't try to pass. why do we force trans women to feel obligated to pass perfectly within our own walls in order to accept them? if transfems aren't super feminine and don't pass very well, they're treated like shit. no, not everyone at the meeting in a polo and slacks is a man. sometimes that's a trans woman who's butch. sometimes that's a trans woman who's passing as a man for safety.

people seriously need to understand how bad this behavior affects transfems & trans women. intersex people as well.

i love being a fem man as well, however, i also love being a gay bear. i am a feminine bear. the thing is, is people don't realize that masculinity can be feminine, too, and vice versa. not all fems are just fem. some are also masc and butch. so many people have gotten suckered into rad feminism that they spread the lie that queerness is feminine and woman based only. masc queers are still queer. we don't need this feminine/woman superiority shit. we don't need one gender or presentation to be "superior". that's not how equality works

[theabigailthorn]

Hi Abby! I have a question I’ve been wondering for a while, and I really hope it’s okay to ask. I’ve been a little worried about it because, idk…it’s a tough topic, and I know a lot of trans people get a bunch of bullshit flack, and I don’t want to accidentally contribute to that. That being said— do you miss anything from before you transitioned?

I’m definitely some flavor of trans, but idk what exactly 😅 and you’ve been a major hopeful figure to me. I just can’t help but wonder…is it…worth it? So many people say it is. But I’m so scared. I don’t want to lose my family or their love, even if it’s conditional. And sometimes I’m scared that I’ll miss aspects of myself as who I am now. So I wanted to ask you, because I look up to you and respect you a lot!

Sorry that this ask is a mess, I’m kind of all over the place. And obviously you don’t have to answer if it makes you uncomfortable or if these are shitty questions to ask. However! If you’re comfortable, I’d love to know your thoughts. Thank you so much for all you do — it’s more than you know.

In my experience yes it's absolutely worth it because the alternative for me was dying, so it'd have to be pretty rotten not to be worth it! But in addition to that quite grim baseline, yes I think it's the best thing I've ever done. It's allowed me to experience so much more of the variety and wonder of being a person in a way that I couldn't have imagined when I was in the closet - it's made me more intelligent, more moral, more compassionate, and closer to the people I love than ever before. There are challenges that come with it, sometimes huge challenges - especially in this time of transphobic backlash - but if you gave me a magic wish I really don't think I'd choose to have been born cis. In terms of worrying you'll miss aspects of yourself, I had that worry too - I discussed it with Mia Mulder when my egg was cracking and she said, "You will change, but you keep the good bits."

At the same time, it's important to be realistic: transition won't solve your problems and there are no consequence-free transitions. I was lucky in that there was only one person in my old life who couldn't accept me post-transition, but it was someone I loved very much and it still hurts a little - I still hope that one day we might find a way to be friends again. Transition also comes with tradeoffs and compromises, much like life!

[i-like-forcefem]

Minors look away!!! This is a somewhat horny blog!!!

The name tells ya all that you need to know!

But more details under the cut

But if you insist:

I’m an 18 year old Aro/Ace gal who wants to make some casual posts and maybe have some kinky fun

Go to our alt @i-like-extreme-forcefem if you want more horny stuff! This blog is generally about trans positivity

asks are lovely but I won’t get to all of them! AND please stay on topic! I'd love to help crack some eggs! I'd to hear some fun forcefem or transition stories! Light hearted kink and gender advice! BUT I won't be a crutch for your mental health! I'm still 18! I got my own life to worry about! (My friend made me copy paste this in here, sorry cuties! There's other places if you need help! I suggest the "The Orchard" discord! It's filled with nice folks who not only want to help, but can help well!) (oh and I won't respond to all asks! I'll read them! But I sometimes I feel bad about spamming my dear followers dash board with responses, so if I don't think I can play of your ask it might be deleted! Sorry! Do still send it! Each one has made me smile even if I didn’t have a post)

Dms are open! But um generally don't respond to them unless I invited someone... It's a shame really, gosh, just have a lot on my plate most of the time, it's fine to give a shot but please don't ever put it on yourself if I don't respond!!!

Know at least that I never find any DMs annoying! Same as asks they put a smile on my face even if I’m sadly too busy to answer (I’m down for everything from: talking about what you love about forcefem, to talking about gender, to giving you board game recommendations! (Assuming I read your dm when I’ve got time to respond!) (also nothing wronged with shooting multiple shots!!!)

Tags: I tag everything! they should be mostly self explanatory and pop up as you start searching in the blog, though I'll explain some just to be sure it's clear:

Gentle: if you want someone to take you by the hand, tell you it's all going to be okay, and feed you some estrogen, that's the vibes I tag this with!

i-like-talking: Original posts

ilf-teasings: it's asks that try to tease me personally! I very very very much enjoy them but you might be better off blocking it if you'd like!

Force: If you want someone to lock you in the basement, deprive you of food until you put on a maid dress and explain how you're a little maid, always have been and want nothing more then to serve your new master, this tag is for you

(These are normally tagged like #Force #Gentle #Forcefem, oh and there are posts that have both Force and Gentle! They're quite fun!)

Oh and I always remain the right to block people! I never really use it, but ye, if you dislike me you should block me too!!! It's what makes this site useable (and I also block folks that make content I dislike, no morality attached if I find someone annoying they're gone from the blog!)

Alright that’s all cuties! Have fun exploring the blog!

(Banner by: @not3catsinatrenchcoat, check her out!)

[habitual-truant]

"Naoto isn't trans! Kanji isn't gay! You obviously don't understand their character arcs at all!"

I'm allowed to be critical of the homophobic and transphobic narratives that are in persona 4. Obviously in canon kanji is straight and Naoto is a cis girl, but it pisses me off when people decide to say "you don't understand their character!" because I do. I KNOW Kanji's arc was about toxic masculinity. I KNOW Naoto didn't like being a girl because she wasn't treated fairly and taken seriously for it. I KNOW they aren't queer. But they should have been.

Throughout persona, a person's shadow has been some part of their unconscious mind, the exact part varying from game to game, but the general consensus being that it's the part of the self that's unknown for whatever reason. In persona 4, its the part that is repressed and rejected. Characters defeat their shadow and gain their persona from accepting that their shadow, a manifestation of the things they hate about themselves, is in fact a part of them. It's not exactly the same for Kanji and Naoto though. Kanji's shadow is the result of internalizing what others say about him as the truth, and Naoto's is the result of rejecting what other people think of her, and repressing the reasons why they think those things. Unlike the other characters who's shadows entirely come from their own emotions and thoughts, Kanji and Naoto's shadows come from how other's perception of the two affects them.

Kanji's shadow is a "gross pervert" that lusts over men. Based off of the other characters and how they defeat their shadows, you would think he has internalized homophobia, and that by accepting his shadow, he accepts being gay. But, its the opposite. Kanji accepts he's straight despite liking feminine things. He accepts that he's NOT gay. I understand the intentions. I know his shadow was the way it was because he was accused of being gay and made fun of for liking girlish things, and he internalized it. I know his arc is about toxic masculinity and unlearning it. But Kanji was attracted to men before his arc. He all of a sudden magically becomes straight after accepting his shadow. "But he had a crush on Naoto, who ended up being a girl!" Yeah, I understand. Doesn't change the fact that Naoto presented as a boy, and was completely socially transitioned. At that point, Kanji had literally no reason to think that Naoto was a girl, he completely saw her as a boy. The writers backpedaled on his attraction to boys. It implies being attracted to the same sex is something you can change, and that it's worth changing. Not to mention, his entire arc is played off as a joke. his shadow is a "pervert queer" because its "haha funny" for a masculine man to like men. It's a mockery.

Naoto's shadow isn't nearly as insulting, showing the main focus of Naoto's arc; nobody respects her as a detective because she's a teenage girl. However, Naoto herself says she doesn't like being a girl when her shadow reveals the fact that she's a girl. Yes, it's because she's ridiculed and disregarded because she's not a man, but she's still uncomfortable as a girl and actively chooses to present as a boy, even after gaining her persona. She is undeniably transcoded, at the very least, before she accepts her shadow. She accepts that she's not taken seriously, that she IS all the things that people look down on her for being, and that she IS actually a girl. Again, while not doing a complete 180, the writers back out of Naoto wanting to be a boy. Even though her arc isn't as abysmally insulting as Kanji's, it still sells the narrative that trans people need to accept that they "aren't trans, just pretending,"

No matter how you look at it, the "moral of the story" for both Kanji and Naoto is that being gay or trans isn't something you should accept about yourself. Both Kanji and Naoto have queer themes in their stories, even if the writers backed out and effectively gave the opposite message. They're queercoded, end of story. For us queers to reject the homophobic + transphobic themes and decide "no, actually these characters ARE gay" is completely reasonable. Who are you to tell us that we aren't allowed to reject the honestly disrespectful writing from a triple A game franchise? Why wouldn't we dislike the way the characters are written? And why do you only complain when its the two characters that are so close to being queer rep?

I 100% understand and respect people who disagree with the headcanons, but those who mock and make fun of people who do consider Kanji and Naoto to be queer? That's something I can't accept.

TL;DR: People choose to interpret Kanji and Naoto as queer because of the queer themes in their arcs. The same themes that the writers completely backpedaled on, and ended up implying harmful things on instead.