#yes im still on my
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Honestly wish the Malfoy family was more like the Adams family. Narcissa is a perfect morticia and we just gotta tweak Lucius a bit and make him more gomez-y, deathly in love with her to the point it makes normal people uncomfortable. Draco would've turned out so much better if they were like this.
#yes im still on my#harry potter#bullshit#idk why#i hate it too#malfoy family#the addams family#i need the malfoys to be more like the addams's so bad#draco malfoy#narcissa black malfoy#lucius malfoy#only mentioned ig#but yk#he's there
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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.
you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.
you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.
don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.
if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.
you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:
how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!
aren't you happy yet?
#almost wrote the champagne line as ''effervescent'' but legit could not write it without saying ''effervescent like a snail''#ah tumblr...#writeblr#warm up#idk . having trouble writing rn#ps i don't like to talk about it . it is my medical information. but before you ask. yes this is about being on the spectrum#i really don't like when ppl make my writing about how im [whatever ID]. i want it to ring true for the people who it rings true for#i don't want it to be like ''awwwww look at this person!!! she's the EXCEPTION!!! :)" .....#no.... not really.....#idk something gross happens whenever i admit to certain conditions and i turn into like inspiration p*rnography#like yes they actually let us use keyboards these days#furthermore i just... dont feel comfortable talking about this part of me. i had too bad of a childhood. adhd is one thing...#this one im like. still coming to terms with. which is like. my own journey.#idk. just please be kind. some things are more private than others. this one feels private to me.#i do not know how to help others w/this . and i do not know how to help myself. i will talk about it if im ever ready. idk if that will#actually ever happen#ty in advance i love u im kissing you we are kissing somewhere on the spectrum
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being a sanji fan is an intense experience because it takes you like 200 episodes to finally understand why sanji's eyes turned lifeless for a flickering moment at those words
#epi 793#me : im gonna sleep early tonight#me at 3 am : *thinks about sanji's past and starts crying*#man why couldn't i just do cocaine to pass my time why did i start watching one piece#one piece sanji#black leg sanji#sanji#vinsmoke sanji#kuroashi no sanji#whole cake island#whole cake arc#queued im so fuckin bummed goodbye#but yes i still maintain my stance on sanji and the punk hazard children.he was absolutely right#sanji my beloved#sanji meta
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I'm always pushing you away from me / but you come back with gravity / and when I call, you come home
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk leaks#yuuji#megumi#deleted scene gege told me#god im not over 266 i will never ever ever be over 266#im so incredibly unwell abt them i cant believe this is the timeline we live in#itafushi friday....itafushi everyday.....#decided 2 forgo my usual miku and broke out the emo playlist fr this one . breaking my own heart :3#how many itfs embraces do i need to draw until i successfully manifest it in canon#gege i beg i plead pls let them H U G#they r so traumatized they r so touch starved pls hug pls contact pls Holds/Is Hold#anyway if megumi's height is inconsistent no it isn't <3 if he looks like 2 completely different ages no he doesnt <33#......kids r Hard guys gomen i tried my best#honestly it's probably not even that bad i think its the arm angle in the first one thts throwing me#i had to play around w it so much that i think im just tired of looking at it#megumi voice whatever !!!!!#thats not important the important thing is Itafushi Hug#and i do believe i met my quota in that regard#also yes my pen pressure Is still dying thank u fr asking but i did this fr them Anyway pls clap
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I spray him like the misbehaving cat he is
#baldurs gate astarion#baldur's gate 3#baldurs gate fanart#bg3#astarion#yes im still romancing him even though hes cringe#actually BECAUSE i think he is cringe#but i will never change for a man smh my head#get a better moral compass sir
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COME HOME, Grian says simply. (---"The shadow people come by every once in a while")
Lil thing for @definitelynotshouting 's your half of the ransom about secret life scar 🌻
#goodtimeswithscar#grian#secret life smp#secret life#desert duo#isdoodles#im still figuring procreate out o7 KAJDKAWKD TRYING. MY BEST#but ye a lil something for tem im glad u liked it OUGHGHGUR <3#sl scar lore will be the death of me
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father strange!!!
Happy for the baby scene kids. It no longer feels so significant to have kept mine since 2010. but alas. happy for the baby scene kids.
#yes my shoe size has not changed since i was 12 im a freak im a weirdo ok#i still fit into all my middle school emo clothes
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#my art#harry du bois#kim kitsuragi#disco elysium#disco elysium fanart#harrykim#kimharry#or whatever they're called#let this man have happiness or so help me#im a firm believer in harry getting a slow post-recovery glow up alright. it's the least i can do for the guy.#man i was listening to so many banger songs while making this#im still getting back in the flow of painting so most of my stuff is kinda messy still#but i suspect ill find a middle ground between this and my last piece style-wise#gearing up to drawing kim in all his glory too now that ive finished two different side profiles of him. only a matter of time now#also fun little fact. i drew over half of this (~4 ? hours) using just my finger on the trackpad of my laptop lol#sometimes it helps me to just put shapes and colors down. when ive got a pen i get too nitpicky about being perfect/using fancy techniques#sometimes all you need is. finger 🫶#OH!! i forgot to mention someone spotted it in the tags—yes this is based on that one leyendecker piece!!
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tango doodles
first you make up a guy and then you struggle to draw him correctly
#i need to stop drawing all the faces in 3/4 this is just silly.#gahh#anyways yes! im still on my quest to make tango look at least a little older#because every time i hear his voice the image in my head doesn't fit the sound at all.#dude has a raspy voice that doesn't exactly fit a little guy. if i could id draw him with more realistic proportions but i cant.#because um. reasons.#i can't just give up on my creachur cmon now...#ive noticed recently i tweaked a lot of my designs to be less cartoony. not sure if i like that actually. hm.#man i keep saying stuff like 'oh i gotta make weirder designs' but then i do the exact opposite??? huh?#i should stop trying to be normal. it's really hurting my image#GOD anyways. tags under the post yes.#tangotek#my art#sketch
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ive been rewatching voltron....
#my art#goro akechi#persona 5#shuake#p5r#ren amamiya#persona 5 royal#akeshu#sumire yoshizawa#akira kurusu#yes maybe im considering finishing the love letters klance fic someday#i dont even know if anyone following me / active rn remembers that this used to be a klance blog#blink if you remember klance daily prompts#its so obvious if u ever go through the archive of this blog cause its all still there but it HAS been 4 years#not that im gonna return to klance but i really wana finish that fic i feel bad for having left it unfinished
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I think they'd get along well, don't you? 🕶
This is based off of a scene in my fav ATSV fic called 'Five Times Pavitr isn't Affected by the Spider-Man Luck'
#atsv#across the spiderverse#pavitra prabhakar#pavitr prabhakar#mayday parker#atsv pavitra#atsv pavitr#fic rec#fic ref#fic fanart#yes Im still on atsv#the brainrot is too intense#my art
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*bi lights your king*
for @aeonthedimensionalgirl <3<3
#thank u for the pic hehehe#my art#fanart#merlin#bbc merlin#merlin fanart#bbc merlin fanart#merlin bbc#arthur pendragon#bbc arthur#bbc arthur pendragon#arthur pendragon fanart#bbc arthur pendragon fanart#this is for the pride badge in the bingo YES I KNOW ITS A MONTH LATE BUT CAN I STILL GET IT IM SO SORRY
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Hilson should have had ONE. (1) honest to god fistfight. Not talking about no pansy ass scuffle either i need a FIGHT. Im talking bloodied noses nd bruised cheeks. I need them to exchange words that will alter the course of their relationship forever. MOST OF ALL. They need to make out nastystyle afterwards
#Drawing this was so fuckingfunny because house is so absolutely into this HHEKELALLAOAPPPAOSJHHAGHEHU#Yes i tried to draw this homoerotic as possible but simultaneously house by nature would be SO into this i dont even get a say in it#LOOK AT HIS FACE#Wilson would get MAD mad and house would be like “😳😳😏😏” Hes such a little freak. What fucking ever#House needed to get jumped soooo bad chase swinging on his ass is still to date the best thing hes ever done in-show#Im not even sayingthis becayse i hate house i fucking love house actually one of my charactersof all time#But the shit this man pulls sometimes. Bro#like u need to get jumped. FOR YOUR OWN GOOD#johan being crazy about yaoi md#johan's scrapbook#house md#house md fanart#hilson#hilson fanart#james wilson#gregory house
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another late @zukki-week entry, for day 2 // skinny dipping
and as a special treat it comes with @erisenyo's fantastic fic And Babe, (What Do you Mean) We Ain't Even Dating that this scene is based on!!
#id in alt text#befORE someone feels like being haha funny on my post#yes yue is watching over sokka's bare ass yes she is shining her best most flattering moonbeams on them#yes she supports bisexual endeavors#also!! this comes with a twitter bonus iykyk#im trying to upload it on ao3 too but its still giving me pROBLEMS will be up one day I prommy#suki#sokka#zuko#zukki#my art
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constance hardbroom. her autism has bewitched me.
#yes im back into tww hi#fear not moiraine is still my nr1 but goddd ive missed miss hardbroom#my art#finally watching the 1998 show#i love her sm#she radiates autism im sorry i dont make the rules#the vibes of the whole show are so charming and fun and warm#tww98#tww fanart#the worst witch#1998#constance hardbroom#miss hardbroom#fanart#tww98 fanart
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🍁 i bring to u life series nitw au and a gem doodle
#i have zero things planned out for this au dont ask#oooorrr like. i do but tjey all suck so im still at the drawing board!!!! really am no good at anything but drawingf grian !!!#kidding ummm boatem band yes i like weird autumn a lot#trafficblr#hermitblr#boatem#grian#impulsesv#gtws#gtwscar#goodtimeswithscar#pearlescentmoon#life series au#life series#hermitcraft#nitw#geminitay#hermitcraft season 10#my art#yeah#I FORGOT TO TAG MUMBO#mumbo jumbo
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