#yeah you know it’s not like i’ve had MULTIPLE conversations with my mother and we’ve BOTH said how fucking weird it is him coming over to

[permanentreverie]

the audacity of my father wanting to go out to dinner 💀

[blogger360ncislarules]

Ask any of Jonathan Roumie’s costars in The Chosen what it’s like to work with the 49-year-old actor as he beautifully inhabits the complicated Jesus of Nazareth and there are no pauses or loss of words in their response.

For example, Elizabeth Tabish, who plays devoted follower Mary Magdalene—the first person He heals onscreen—praises Roumie’s honesty and credibility. “There are moments where you catch yourself and [go], ‘Oh, it’s really Jesus,’” she says.

Noah James (Apostle Andrew) notes, “Jonathan has set the standard for being a good castmate and partner.” Adds Amber Shana Williams (follower Tamar): “Not everyone is as kind as [their] character, but he really is.”

Roumie, who was baptized Greek Orthodox but later converted to Roman Catholicism (his mother, from Ireland, is also a practicing Catholic), doesn’t take representing the Son of God lightly. Here, he talks about lacing up the sandals and how doing the show changed his spirituality.

The Chosen isn’t the first time you’ve portrayed Jesus. (Roumie played a more classic Jesus in films Heart of Mercy and creator Dallas Jenkins’ The Two Thieves.) How did your interpretation of Him evolve?

Jonathan Roumie: The first thing I did was create an accent that, to me, was at least regional. I grew up with a father from Egypt and Arab family members, and my aunt is from Palestine, so it made sense to borrow it from that. It was a little rougher [originally] than it is now because I hadn’t had a whole lot of time to refine it. But that became my entry into the character. It hasn’t drastically changed. If you watch the first four or five seasons of The Simpsons, Homer’s voice [Dan Castellaneta] isn’t quite where it is now, and all of the voices settle in after awhile. I think I’ve settled in.

I love that you just brought The Simpsons into this interview.

I’m friends with Bishop Robert Barron [theologian and host of PBS’s Catholicism], and whenever we hang out we are literally making Simpsons references and doing Homer impressions. You appreciate greatness wherever you find it, you know?

What kind of conversations have you had with Dallas or others about your portrayal of Jesus?

I think when somebody is cast for a role, hopefully 95 percent of the work is already present in what they did in the audition—or in their personalities—especially with television. “Kindness in the eyes” is something I’ve heard a lot about my portrayal. There are moments when Dallas is just fine-tuning my performance, because he’s very clear about what he wants. Sometimes, I might have an approach and I’ll convince him to try it my way. He’ll be like, “Yeah, that was better” or “No, just do it the way I told you the first time.” [Laughs] You win some and you lose some.

Are you thinking ahead to the carrying of the cross and the Crucifixion scenes that you’ll inevitably have to do?

I think about what it could look like. I have a lot of questions and ideas about my approach to it. But I can’t really focus on it until we’re going to prepare for it because my mind has to be present with whatever the scenes are that we’re doing now.

How do you think The Chosen’s version of His final moments will differ from other portrayals?

We’ve had a lot more time for people to build a relationship with Jesus, so it probably won’t have to be as gruesome as, let’s say, The Passion of the Christ, as beautiful as that was. Mel [Gibson, who directed the 2004 film] took 72 hours, if you’re including the Resurrection, [and turned it] into two and a half hours [of movie time]. We’re taking eight hours every season to tell a few weeks.

Instagram

Do fans ever treat you like you’re actually the Savior?

When people meet me, they tend to have a similar emotional response to me as they do the character. They know I’m not Jesus, but they call me Jesus. I’m always looking for ways to make that distinction. I just don’t think it’s healthy for me to try to perpetuate the concept that I am the sinless Son of God, which I am clearly not. [Laughs] So, I try to gently receive the encounter with the spirit of Jesus. I try to do that without saying, “I’m not Jesus and I won’t sign this until you call me Jonathan.” The strangest example of that is when I met the Pope for the second time and he said, “Oh, it’s Jesus.”

Pope Francis recognized you?

The Pope. As a Catholic, I’m like, “Only on TV. Only on TV.” And he laughed. It can be surreal at times.

How has this job impacted your spirituality?

It’s completely deepened my faith and affected my relationship with God. It makes me want to be a better version of myself and the best human being possible. I’ve been put here to play this character for a reason, I believe. And if that’s to allow people to get closer to their faith and to develop a relationship with God, then what more could I ask for as an actor? How many times in an actor’s career do you get an opportunity to have a real tangible impact on someone’s life?

[itsallyscorner]

Baby’s First Heartbreak

pairing: marvel cast x teen!fem!reader, Scarlett Johansson x reader, Elizabeth Olsen x reader

prompt: the youngest member of the marvel cast experiences her first breakup.

warnings: not much—crying, a break up.

A/n: Tom is 19 here because this is set during Civil War. He was such a baby omg🥺

You were always a firm believer in having hope. No matter what the situation was, you knew that you had to at least try before fully giving up. You were only 18, but it was the mindset you grew up with. You were taught to face things with bravery and confidence, you faced things head to head with all your might. Though some things never went the way you planned, you were still the ray of sunshine you were, all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, eager to learn and explore the world.

You had the same mindset going into your first relationship. Love was something you’ve always wanted to experience. Sure, you received it from your friends and family. But you wanted the different kind of love. The special one that was shared between two people. The one that made your heart skip a beat and made you breathless. Where staring into that special someone’s eyes felt like you were being transported into another world where it was just the two of you.

You’ve found that kind of love in a boy from your hometown. The two of you had been friends since pre-k, growing up along side each other, and being there for each other’s success and failures. You’ve known him all your life but the feelings didn’t come till sophomore year of high school. It all just clicked all of sudden; that one day where he said you looked cute in his jumper and the next moment you knew you were seeing him in a new light. Junior year, you were both beating around the bush; constantly pining over each other with longing stares and fingers always brushing against each other. Though you didn’t see him all the time due to your job as an actress. You spent half of the school year in your hometown and the rest at Atlanta. Of course he knew of your job and as much as he hated to see you go, he knew you were doing something that made you happy. So he spent as much time as he could with you before your time together came to an end. A few days prior to your flight to Atlanta, under the night sky of your backyard, he admitted his feelings for you. By senior year, the two of you had been dating for half a year. It had been the best moments of your life, you were in love and high on happiness, it was like nothing in life could ever go wrong.

Now here you were, in your trailer on the set of Captain America: Civil War, sobbing you eyes out. You knew loving could hurt, but not this much. You still felt your heart skip a beat, but it was clenching in heartache. You were still breathless, but because you’ve been trying to catch your breath after every sob that wracked your body. You felt broken. The boy you loved had ripped your heart out of your chest and threw it onto the floor, stomping on it till it stopped beating.

You hiccuped as you stared at yourself in the mirror. You were nothing but a fool. A fool who had hope in something that was never going to work. You sniffled as you snatched tissues out of the box on your bathroom sink, dabbing the material onto your eyes and blowing your nose. Your eyes were red and your cheeks were puffy. A sigh of frustration releases from your body. There was no way you could walk onto set without people asking you what was wrong.

You debated asking your assistant to ask your designated makeup artist to do your makeup in your trailer, you didn’t want to be a bother. But your thumbs were already shamefully typing away the request on your phone. A few minutes later Eleanor, your makeup artist on set, arrives at your trailer with her supplies in hand.

She doesn’t directly question you, but she has the look of a concerned mother once she sees your face. You lie to her and tell her you weren’t having a good day and chalked it up to being homesick.

You dreaded going on set. You weren’t sure if you could face anyone without bursting into tears. The moment you felt like you were okay, your heart would clench, reminding you of the ache it was feeling.

You were in your costume, sitting on the sidelines of the set while you rehearsed your lines. The dialogue from the script acted as a distraction from the current pain you were feeling. The tears had stopped but your eyes felt dry, making you blink multiple times to keep them wet.

“Hey, sweetheart.” You look up and meet the stunning blue eyes of Chris Evans. That typical goofy smile of his was etched onto his features. Usually you would reciprocate that smile, but today you just couldn’t find it in your heart to do so. His smile falters when he sees your face.

“Morning.” You greet him, forcing a smile. Concern shadows on his face as he shifts a bit closer to you. “You alright?” He asks, eyes softening at you. Being the youngest of all the Avengers cast members, everyone had a soft side for you. Especially Chris, who saw you as a daughter.

“Y-yeah, I’ve just got—allergies.” You lied, another fake smile forcing itself onto your lips.

“Well have you taken something to help your allergies? Do you need Allegra? Claritin or something?” He looked around ready to call one of the runners on set to get you some meds.

“No! I took some already, a few minutes ago! It probably hasn’t kicked in yet.” You tell him. He eyes you reluctantly, not knowing if he should believe you. He decides to let it pass and nods, “Ok, tell me if you need anything though.”

You hum in response and tilt your head down back to your script.

The day goes on and everyone had caught on to your lack of—being you. The infamous smile everyone knew you by was barely on your face. You didn’t crack jokes with Anthony or share a giggle with Elizabeth. Instead you were quiet, a frown was on your face as you stared blankly at the floor. You didn’t interact with anybody, keeping to yourself and walking off set whenever one of the Russos called cut.

Anthony and Sebastian watched as you walked off the set. You have all finished a sequence of the airport scene and the Russos had given everyone a break while they rewatched the scenes they shot. Anthony’s brows furrowed while he watched your figure go further and further away. He had tried to cheer you up, telling you a joke about how Seb’s arm lube kept leaking out his fake arm. Your response was nothing but a fake laugh—it wasn’t even a fake laugh, more like a huff of laughter.

“She didn’t laugh at my joke.” Anthony thought aloud. Sebastian quirked an eye at his friend, “Does she have to laugh at all your jokes?”

“No, but even if I tell her a corny ass joke, she’ll still laugh at it.” He expressed, throwing his arms up. Sebastian’s lip pouted as he thought back to your behavior on set. You were acting unusual. He turns to Tom (Holland) and asks, “Hey, has (y/n) said anything to you? Like anything bothering her?”

The Brit shakes his head, “Um, nope. Besides filming, I haven’t spoken to her today.”

Anthony crosses his arms, approaching Tom, “Have you tried speaking to her? We’ve been trying to figure out what’s been going on with her today and you’re the closest to her age here.”

“I—I tried to talk to her, but she didn’t seem in a talking mood. I thought I was bothering her so I just stopped.” Tom answered. He gestures to the direction of the trailers, “I could check up on her right now? Maybe I’ll get her one of her favorite snacks from crafties, it might cheer her up.”

Half of a smile makes it way onto Sebastian’s face at the boy’s efforts. Though you were clearly upset and he felt like they were all prodding at your privacy. “Maybe we should give her some time alone.”

Tom frowns at the older man, “But (y/n)’s upset. Shouldn’t we do something?” Anthony agrees with Tom and looks at Sebastian.

Seb raises his hands up in defense, “I’m just saying—maybe she wants to be alone. She went back to her trailer away from everybody. She probably doesn’t want us shoving our noses into her business, we should respect that.”

Chris joins the group along with Scarlett and Elizabeth. He had overhead the group talking and urged the two ladies to join him in on the conversation.

“You guys talking about (y/n)?” Chris asks, hands on his waist.

“Yeah, Seb says we should leave her be.” Anthony fills him in.

“She told me she had allergies.” Chris starts. “She’s an amazing actress, but kid’s gotta work on the lying.” He finishes. Elizabeth and Scarlett glance at each other.

“Well has anyone talked to her at all today? Besides Chris?” Elizabeth asked the group. Everyone shakes their head. Elizabeth sighs while looking around at anyone else who could’ve talked to you. She spots Eleanor hanging along the sides with her makeup belt on, ready for touch ups. Elizabeth calls her over. Eleanor has her brush ready to powder her down, but Elizabeth politely declines.

“You do (y/n)‘s makeup right?”

Eleanor nods, “Yeah, I do.”

“How was she this morning? We’re just a bit concerned since she’s been acting different today.” Eleanor sighs, knowing if she told them it would be an invasion of your privacy. Although, they were all concerned for you and so was she.

“I got a text from her assistant telling me to do her makeup in her trailer today.” She began. “I walked in and her eyes were red, cheeks puffy—“

Chris apologizes and interrupts her, “Because of allergies?”

Eleanor shakes her head, “No, she never mentioned anything about allergies. But she looked like she’s been crying. She was wiping her face when I arrived.”

“Did she give you a reason for why she was crying?” Scarlett questions her.

“She told me she was feeling homesick.” Eleanor answered. Scarlett turned to Chris and shared a look. Elizabeth thanks Eleanor then turns back to the group.

“We need to check up on her.” Anthony says. All the men nodded and began to make their way to your trailer. Suddenly, they were stopped by Scarlett and Elizabeth.

“But (y/n)—“ Tom said pointing to the trailers. Scarlett shakes her head, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Lizzie and I will go. You guys are gonna overwhelm her with all your questions.” Scarlett insists, much to the men’s dismay. They wanted to be there for you, but maybe a mother figure might help you open up with what’s bothering you. They agree and let the two women go to your trailer. Before they can get to you, they get some snacks from crafties for you.

As soon as you shut the trailer’s door behind you, the tears welled up in your eyes again. It only took a matter of seconds until they fell from your eyes and down your cheeks. You heard some people walk by outside and cover your mouth to muffle the whimpers that came out your mouth. You slid down the door and shoved your head into your hands. You leaned forward against your knees as you cried into your arms. You felt pathetic, embarrassed, anger; you were feeling so many things and the only way to let them all out seemed to be crying.

They heard your cries from behind the door. Scarlett sends Elizabeth an alarmed look as she rushes up to your door. She knocked on it repeatedly, causing you to jump from behind the door. Your cries come to a stop while you try to wipe away the tears as best as you can.

“(Y/n), honey, please open the door.” You hear Scarlett say. You remain silent, getting up and dusting your legs off. You stare at the door, debating whether you should open it or not.

“(Y/n), everyone’s worried about you. We just want to help.” Another voice coaxes you behind the door. Elizabeth. “Please let us in.”

Outside, the two women had their ears pressed up against your trailer’s door. Scarlett tries to get you to open the door again, “It’s only me and Lizzie. I promise.”

There was some shuffling heard behind the door. The door pushes open slowly, making Scarlett and Elizabeth back away. A worried expression appears on Scarlett’s face once she sees you. She cups your cheeks, her thumbs gently swiping away some tears that fell from your eyes. The two of them shuffle inside your trailer. You burst out into tears once again when Scarlett wraps her arms around you. She moves you both to sit on the couch that was in your trailer. She lets you shove your head into the crook of her neck while her hands smoothed your hair. Elizabeth sits behind you rubbing circles onto your back. Your cries broke both their hearts. You were a fairly happy girl, to see you in such pain and heartache was hard to watch.

Scarlett rocks you back and forth, trying to calm you down by whispering comforting words into your ear. She presses a motherly kiss onto your forehead once she sees you start to calm down. Elizabeth waits patiently beside you waiting for when you’re ready to talk. When your whimpers turned into hiccups, Scarlett pulls your face away from her neck to look at you. She frowns when she sees your tear stained cheeks.

“Are you going to tell us what’s going on or are you going to keep bottling it up to yourself?” She asks you softly, tucking strands of your hair behind your ears. Elizabeth chimes in from behind you, “You know, sometimes it helps to tell others what’s bothering you. You don’t have to keep it to yourself, (y/n), you could talk to us.” She gathers your hair together, splitting it into two parts as she began to fish tail braid your hair. 

You take a moment to compose yourself before eyeying the two women. You knew you could trust them. Scarlett was like your on-set mom and Lizzie was like one of your aunts. If you could tell anyone on set what was going on, it would be them.

“He broke up with me.” You confess, eyes trained on your lap. Lizzie’s fingers stop braiding your hair, “What?”

“Peyton, he broke up with me.” You whined, not wanting to say it again. You fiddle with your fingers while a tear falls to your lap.

“Oh honey.” Scarlett cooes pulling you back into her chest. You sniffle and wrap your arms around her torso. Silently crying into her shoulder.

“Did he give you a reason why?” Lizzie asks softly. You move away from Scarlett’s hold and lean against the couch with your knees to your chest. Lizzie wraps an arm around your shoulder for comfort.

You glanced at your phone that was on the coffee table, “H-he texted me earlier this morning. He said he couldn’t do the long distance thing anymore and that he has feelings for somebody else.”

Anger flashes in Scarlett’s eyes, “He broke up with you over a text message?” You nod in response.

“What a dick.” She mutters glaring at your phone. It’s quiet for a few minutes. Until you ask them, “Am I not worth trying for a long distance relationship?”

Lizzie shakes her head, “No, don’t you ever think that because you are.”

You sigh and throw your head back, “Then why did he break up with me? Is there something wrong with me? Am I not pretty enough?” Scarlett interrupts your questions by shushing you.

“There is not a damn thing wrong about you. Don’t you ever let a man, let alone a boy, make you question your worth.” Scarlett advises you a stern look on her face. “You are the most sweetest and loveliest girl I have ever met in my life. You’re kind, you care about the people around you—you even laugh at Anthony’s stupid jokes.”

Lizzie snorts beside you and squeezes your shoulder, “And his jokes are the worst.”

Scarlett continues, “You are a talented young woman already making it big in the movie industry and you did it all on your own. You are beautiful inside and out. You’re perfect, there’s nothing wrong with you.”

“Then why did he leave me?”

“Because he’s an idiot that doesn’t know your worth.” Lizzie answers resting her head on your shoulder. “I know it hurts now but these things happen for a reason. He wasn’t meant for you and you weren’t meant for him. Maybe somewhere in the future you guys will meet and try again. Or maybe you’ll move on with someone new. That’s just how it is. It may sound harsh, but it’s the truth.”

Scarlett nods at Lizzie, “Take it from me, I’ve been married twice. When it seems like you found that special person, sometimes it’ll all come crashing down. And it’s not an easy thing to go through. It’s full of pain, heartache, self doubt and a bunch of other heart wrenching things. But in the end you come out a stronger version of yourself.”

You stare at Scarlett, “How did you do it?”

Scarlett softly smiles at you, “Well, I had lots of friends who supported me every step of the way. But most importantly, I valued myself. I did things that made me happy and took care of myself mentally and physically.”

You bite your lip in thought as you stare at the ground.

“Listen to me.” Scarlett urges you, “You’re young, (y/n). You’re going to meet so many more people in the future that’ll bring you so much happiness and love in your life. Don’t beat yourself up over one boy who decided to leave you because he wasn’t committed for a long distance relationship. You’re going to be okay.” She assures you, cradling your face. Your lips form into a tight smile while you nod in response.

“You have us and the rest of the people outside of this trailer to support you. We’ll always have your back, whatever it is, I promise you that. You’re not going to go through this by yourself.” Lizzie promises you, taking your hand into hers. You hum and rest your head on her shoulder. You pull on Scarlett’s arm to join you and Lizzie. She chuckles and hugs you from behind.

“Thank you guys.” You whisper, genuinely grateful that you had them in your life. Lizzie pecks your temple, “Anytime darling.”

[persephones-wren]

Could you write a Kaz Brekker request where the reader and Kaz are more than friends but not lovers and the reader is a Crow and therefore, can handle things for herself so she doesn't tell Kaz when a friend's ex is threatening her but Kaz ultimately finds out when the ex comes to the Crow Club and Kaz handles it since as much as he knows she capable, he is still protective of her and it leads to them finally becoming official?

Protective (Kaz Brekker x Reader)

I'm sorry about the ending, I couldn't find a great way to finish it- but maybe I'll fix that when I can think of something. Besides that, I hope you like it! :)

Warnings: depicted abuse, mentions of sedatives, misogynistic language (please let me know if there's any more)

Genre: not fluff

Word Count: 2705

You had a confusing relationship with Kaz.

It was an odd “more than friends, less than dating” relationship. It made sense, considering in the Barrel, women were more property than anything else. Besides, leverage was a thing everyone wanted on Kaz, even his closest allies. He wasn’t going to put himself in a position that made him anyone’s puppet. You didn’t exactly need him to declare you untouchable, anyway; you were usually more than okay with skirmishing with the Dime Lions and others that happened to be in your way.

You had never expected him to help you handle things that you could do alone.

It had been one of your wealthier friends, who helped get you out of the Menagerie. She had dated Zachariah Alix, a man with power and influence. She had usually dealt with his off-putting advances and abuse, but even you, who couldn’t see her often, could tell she wasn’t happy.

“Break up with him, then.” Your voice echoed in her private chambers as she sighed, multiple emotions running through her expression.

“Y/N, I just, I can’t. We’re already supposed to be married soon. Criminals in the Barrel are lucky in the way that you’re allowed to love who you please,” and damn your head for immediately thinking Kaz, “but merchers, well, it’s not that simple.”

“You callin’ me a criminal?”

“Yes,” she muttered, and you laughed, “but that’s not the point.”

“Are your parents forcing you to marry him?”

“Not exactly, but there’s going to be a lot more pressure if I break up with him.”

“Alright, well...from the list of merchers we’ve stolen from-'' she shot you a look, “sorry, sorry. It’s true though. I’m sure there’s someone on the list that’s for you.”

“I’ve got someone in mind already.”

“Well, that makes things easier, doesn’t it? Break up with him and get with the other guy. No parental pressure. Why do you need my advice, then? I get caught here and I’m as good as dead.”

“Okay, okay! It’s not parental pressure,” she lowered her voice, guilt painted across her face. “He’s going to stalk me if we break up. He might kill me. I don’t know what to do.”

“Alright,” you mulled it over. “That’s different. What can I do for you, then?”

“Can you be there when we break up? Moral support? And perhaps, well...if it wouldn’t trouble you, maybe do a little something to get him to leave me alone.”

“Like beat him up. It won’t trouble me,” you had answered. “Sure, I’ll do it.”

“Thank you,” she sighed in relief. “You’re the best, Y/N.”

“It’s nothing.”

…

“I don’t think we should continue on like this.”

There was a tension-filled silence, before Alix spoke again. “Why not, sweetheart?” He advanced towards her, and you had to prevent yourself from physically cringing. You were mostly moral support, and there to defend your friend if she got into deep shit, but, well...hopefully it wouldn’t come to revealing yourself.

“You- get off of me,” she pushed him away harshly. “You don’t get to talk me into forgiving you again. You are a child. You hit me and scream and throw tantrums. I want to be with someone who loves me, not someone who treats me like his mother. So that’s it. Get out of my house. We’re breaking up.”

There was another silence, before he spoke up again. “You little bitch,” he snarled, and grabbed at her dress, “you think you can just break up with me? No one’s ever going to be there for you. I’ll kill you and blame it on some Barrel thug. Check yourself, you’d be nobody without me.”

His hand closed in on her neck, and she looked to you, panicked. You put a finger to your lips before you snuck behind him, flicking off the safety and putting the pistol to his head.

He froze.

“Drop her.”

He did, and she slid down against the wall, tears streaming down her face. You had never intended to let it get that far, and it hurt your heart- but you had to deal with him first.

You knocked the gun into his head and used your elbow to knock him to the ground, putting a foot on his chest.

He looked up at you, terrified. What a coward.

“Too bad your daddy never taught you how to use guns,” you taunted, and grinned. “You leave her alone. She’s broken up with you. Get out of her house.”

“You’re Brekker’s whore, aren’t you?”

Your grin grows incredulous. You apply pressure to his chest steadily, and he wheezes, but he still continues.

“Yeah, look at you.You’re all upset, aren’t you, girl? Bet you’re sold out to half of the Barrel by him. Brekker likes his Kruge.” His eyes scan from underneath you. “Can’t say I’d blame him if he wanted to keep you as his personal pet, though.”

You scoff. “Careful what you say, I’m the one with a gun,” you remark, and you click a bullet into place for show, before taking your foot off. “Get out. If you touch her again, it’ll be more than me you’ll deal with.”

He scrambles upwards and disappears, and you hear the front door open and shut. You sigh.

“I’m sorry, I never intended for him to get that far. Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” your friend sighs, hands lightly touching the bruises on her neck. “I think I’ll be okay. Thank you. What about you? You’re not-”

“I’m not with Kaz.” You help her up, and she smothers out her dress. “If Alix ever bothers you again, let me know.”

“Of course. I doubt he will. Thank you again, Y/N.”

…

He never did bother her again, but you- you were a different story. Every day, now, Kaz would offer you a note with some vague taunt on it.

“I’ll kill you.”

“Brekker’s slut! Slept your way to the top!”

“Let’s fight without a gun next time. I’ll have you pinned underneath me.”

“I’ll sedate and have my way with you. You still know some things from the Menagerie, don’t you?”

You had brushed off most of the taunts and threats, but they might’ve been starting to impact you, just a bit. You had assumed that Kaz had never read the threats. Each time, he would hand you the note with no expression.

Today’s note was a bit different.

“Y/N. Another note came in for you today.” He set the note on the table.

“Huh? Oh, thanks.”

You picked it up and unfolded the note, shielding the back of the paper with one hand. Kaz was clever, one of the many things you liked about him. You were sure that he’d try and read the back of the note if he could.

“Let’s meet on your territory. Crow Club at eight, in the alleyway.”

“Got yourself a boy, Y/N? These notes have started coming in every day,” Jesper whistled next to you, eyes scanning over the note. You look up, and Kaz is gone, watching from more of a distance. They’ve got it completely wrong.

You glance back down, and fail to notice how Kaz’s fingers tighten on his cane. Your laugh is dry, and you shake your head. “Nothing of the sort.”

Jesper ignores your denial. “Well, whoever he is, he seems awfully persistent. He wants to meet at the Crow Club, in the alleyway? Kinda sweet he wants to meet on your land, but why won’t he come in? He afraid of us, or somethin’?”

“Something like that,” you affirm.

“Well, I wouldn’t want to meet in here, either,” Inej says.

“Especially not with him here,” Jesper adds.

Your eyes meet Kaz’s across the room, and you both stare for a moment before he turns and looks away.

“Maybe.” Your answers are ambiguous, and you’re sure both Inej and Jesper want to know more, but you need to prepare for tonight.

“Sorry, guys. Excuse me.”

…

You have three throwable knives strapped into your boots, a small handgun holstered in your coat, and a syringe full of clozapine tucked up your sleeve. You’re prepared to take Alix down easily. You don’t exactly intend to shoot him, if only to make sure that the Crows don’t have a bigger target on their back from getting involved with the wealthy, but- well, you can’t deny it’s good to be ready in dire circumstances.

It’s 7:58 by the time you’re heading out to the back of the alley. You’re hiding behind the wall, just about to step over, but there’s already voices conversing there.

Did he bring backup? You grimace. You hadn’t considered that he might not fight fairly.

“Did she send her boyfriend after me ‘cause she was too much of a pussy to show?”

“I’d be careful what you say about Y/N.”

That’s Alix, and Kaz.

You’re not sure what you’re supposed to feel. He never did these kinds of things for you, never declared you his, but- you could handle this yourself. You didn’t need his protection, and you didn’t need him going out to deal with things because of one creepy ex.

Or, your thoughts betray you, you’re worried for him, because this could be a trap.

He glances over at the wall, where he seems to know you’re standing. It’s a warning glance, one to be quiet and let him deal with it.

“Aw, Brekker, you sweet on her? And here I thought it was a one-sided thing. Too bad I’m gonna ruin that pretty face of yours.”

Alix comes swinging. Kaz doesn’t say anything in reply, and instead jabs his cane forward, right into his stomach. He stumbles backward, and Kaz is still poised, waiting.

“I thought you were going to be more of a challenge than this. Even a fool knows not to attack first.”

“I’m no fool, Brekker. Don’t make any more sudden moves, or you’ll be shot. Do you know how easy it is to hire hitmen?”

There’s a faint look of surprise in Kaz’s expression before it smooths back into calm. “Well, to be honest,” he smiles pleasantly, “I thought merchers were above such methods.”

He’s glancing at you again, before his eyes move over two guard towers.

He’s pointing out to you where they are. Shit, what do you do? You’re no Inej, who can scale the walls and take them down silently. You’re no Jesper, who can shoot them with precision. You’re not going to be able to take out both snipers quickly enough. If you kill Alix and Kaz doesn’t dive behind the wall in time, he’ll get shot.

You let out a silent sigh. If only you could get both Kaz and Alix behind the wall, then you can get rid of the problem at its source, and then fuck the hitmen. They’re not going to kill Kaz if they can’t get paid.

“The rich are never above any methods. The only thing the rich care about is eradicating the criminals that roam the streets. I thought I was gonna get Y/N, and I could take her back to Tante Heleen,” he grinned, “But you’ll be worth a lot more. Wonder who’ll lay claim to you first.”

Kaz doesn’t say anything, just puts his hands behind his back, as if he’s waiting to be cuffed. But he gives quick signals to you, right before Alix steps around to secure the bonds- a quick countdown. He’s expecting you to shoot.

“No plans up your sleeves this time, Dirtyhands?”

You suddenly fire at Alix’s shoulder, a scream tearing through his throat as the cuffs drop to the ground. Kaz dives towards the wall, grabbing his cane along the way and breathing hard next to you.

Somehow, your aim remains true, and when you peek over the corner, you see Alix desperately trying to grasp at his wound. A grim sort of satisfaction greets your expression.

“Should’ve shot him in the head,” Kaz looks on with you.

“I’m trying not to paint a bigger target on our backs,” you explain, before you remember you’re supposed to be mad at him. Damn him for taking the fall for you. Did he know it was going to be a trap?

“Why the hell would you confront him alone? I had it handled, Kaz.”

“Not now..” His stare is directed at the shadows. And before you can get another word out, both of you are headed to his office.

The brisk walk is silent, and the tension could be cut through with a knife. At last, you reach his office, and he shuts the door, and sits down at his desk. You stand in front of him.

“Care to explain why you decided to confront Alix by yourself?” “I read the notes. I knew it was a trap.”

This doesn’t make you feel any better. “So you read the notes, where he called me a whore, a slut, your personal toy, and you don’t decide to tell me? You let it continuously happen, and then when the note comes today, you decide to go and white-knight for me because protecting me is a better idea than consulting me, huh?” you scoff. “That’s bullshit. You know I can handle myself. There’s a reason you chose me to be a part of the Crows, is there not? Or is what Alix said true? Did I sell myself to get to the top? Become your bitch?”

“I knew you could handle yourself just fine,” Kaz says calmly. “I didn’t want you to get hurt, because you didn’t consider the fact it was a trap. You could’ve died.”

“I would’ve been fine alone. Just because you’re the one who accounts for everything doesn’t mean I don’t use my head.” You know you’re being unfair, he’s right about the fact that you thought the fight was legitimate, but you could’ve saved yourself all the same.

“I’m not saying you don’t use your head, I’m saying that the probability of you dying if you went alone were much higher. I wanted to help you, save your ass back there,” he refutes.

“I would’ve died. So what? Deaths happen all the time in the Barrel! I die, and what?”

He doesn’t say anything.

You give a sardonic laugh. “I’m just an investment to you. I do what you want, with no question or hesitation, because I put my faith in you. My death just means the loss of a good soldier. I’m replaceable, though. My opinions are invaluable, so you don’t talk to me before you do shit. I’m always going to be underneath you, just a pawn.”

“You’re assuming things.”

“Like what, then?”

“Have you considered the fact that I was there because I wanted to help you? Because you’re a part of my Crows, and I don’t take anyone threatening us too kindly?”

His admission has you pausing, but he continues. “You die, and what? Forget what I may feel. What about Inej and Jesper? What about Nina, Wylan? I don’t want you to be underneath me. I see you as an equal.”

“I-”

“That’s why I was there. Because I-” love you, he nearly says, but he stops himself. “I protect the people I love.”

“And I’m someone you love,” you state quietly.

“Yes.”

You’re not sure how much you must have pissed him off to make him an honest man, but you can’t help smiling a little. “Saints, Kaz, at least ask a girl to be yours before you tell her you love her.”

“Fine. Y/N, will you be my girlfriend?”

“Who the hell are you and what have you done with Kaz Brekker?” You grin.

“Stop dodging the question,” he bites out.

“Yeah, I will,” you sigh. “But don’t get yourself killed, and especially not over me, please.”

“Well, darling, I think it’s fair of me to ask the same thing for you- don’t be reckless. People die far too easily in the Barrel,” he responds.

There’s another small silence, before you speak up again.

“Kaz. Thank you.”

He’s slightly surprised at the genuine warmth in your eyes, quickly replacing the anger that was in them before. He shrugs a little.

“It’s what lovers do, right?”

“Yeah,” you answer. “Lovers.”

Lovers, indeed.

[lavishedinjimin]

all the good girls go to hell

— synopsis: The Angels made a deal with Jeon Jungkook, the son of Lucifer, to help them bring Y/n back to her good, prim and proper self. Even though Jungkook grants the atrocious plan, he leaves a lesson that no one should give their trust to a wicked devil like him.

↳ pairing: jungkook x f. reader

↳ genre: smut, very slight angst if you squint hard enough

↳ rating: m/18+

↳ word count: 10k

↳ warnings: religious themes, heaven and hell, angels, devils (this fic is not a correct representation of these figures and is purely fictional), alcohol intake, cursing, hard dom jk, daddy! jk, fingering, multiple orgasms, orgasm denial, squirting, unprotected sex, breathplay, spanking, face fucking, filthy dirty talk, rough sex, jungkook and his demon cock ehe

a/n: title is inspired by billie eilish’s song all the good girls go to hell. her title inspired me to write this fic! please ignore if you find any errors <3

“You’re not good enough.” 

“You look so pathetic, really.”

“Can you at least try to look hot?” 

“This is why no one likes you.” 

These words will forever haunt you until the day you die. 

It wasn’t your fault that you were raised very strictly, your overly-protective parents treating you like some kind of rare treasure that no one, no man, can touch. The fact that your parents still had to drive you home from school even at an age like this always irritated you to the brim of your existence. So now you can’t even have the freedom, the life of a normal young girl can have. 

Being raised strictly with a heavy-handed family – not to mention religious, too – has taken a toll on your mental health. There’s always the feeling of pressure wherever you go and whatever you do. The fear of not succeeding and disappointing your mom and dad is the worst feeling, like the Devil punching your gut repeatedly, as many times as he likes. 

Plus, some students at your school know you for your lack of “personality”, the boring one, the killjoy. You can’t even refute because it was all true. You never experienced fun, parties, how to have interesting conversations, how to interact with a large crowd, all because of your parents being so uptight in you. 

“Y/n!” The high-pitched voice of your mother calls from downstairs, and you were quick to scurry outside your room and find where she was sitting on the couch. “Yes, mom?” You say. 

She was dressed in a royal-blue dress that goes up to her knees, her hair fixed perfectly and the hairspray is clearly doing a great job of keeping her updo in place. She grabs her purse while your dad walks into view, dressed up in a neat suit. “We’re leaving for our business trip, Y/n. Didn’t I tell you that?” 

“Ah.” You sort of forgot about that. 

Quickly nodding your head, you force a fake smile that you know all too well, “Yes.” 

She gives you a weird glance before she fixes her makeup in a mirror, and your dad decides to continue for her. “We’ve hired a nanny to look after you, so that you won’t go out and about going behind our backs—”

“But dad! I really don’t need someone to babysit me,” You scoff. You weren’t a child anymore, what are they thinking! “I’m an adult. I can handle myself. Don’t you trust me?” 

Trust. Something they don’t have with you, whether they admit it or not. 

Your dad just sighs deeply and starts to walk closer to you. He places a hand on your shoulder as he looks straight into your eyes, giving you an authoritarian look. “Y/n, just do as you’re told and be a good daughter.” 

“I’ve always been one,” you scorn. 

“A good daughter doesn’t talk back.” Your mother retorts. 

This is why you can never argue with them. They never let you speak your own opinion or have your own voice. 

Your parents left exactly at 5 PM as they went on their flight to Madrid, leaving the house all to yourself only for tonight.

It was the next day, and you were sitting on the dining table, eating your cereal peacefully as you watched Netflix on your phone – until the doorbell rings. 

You stand up and quickly make your way to the front door, pouting when you already know that it is the person that was supposed to look after you. 

This is ridiculous. 

“Hello!” A bright, short middle aged woman appears standing on the doorway, her bright energy startling you. “Y/n! I’m May, nice to meet you!” She lifts her hand in front for a handshake, and you chuckle nervously, accepting it. “I’m here to look after you for ten days, hm?” 

“Uh, ah, yeah. C-Come in!” You tried to sound as positive and energized as you could to match her own energy, but you couldn’t. You step aside to let her in, pulling her luggage with her and she immediately takes up the design of the house. She was nodding her head, her arms crossed together while you accompanied her little journeys throughout the whole ground floor. You found her weird. 

“Uh, come follow me, my dad says you’ll be staying here at the guest room —” 

“Wonderful! I thought I was sleeping on the couch!” She claps her hands, excited that she has her own room. 

You look at her with big, shocked eyes, yet you can’t say anything. 

“O-Okay…” you mumbled, “Here,” you helped her open the door and she immediately set her things up. “May?” 

“Yes, my dear?” She stops unpacking her bags to look up at you. “I’ll be at the kitchen, okay? If y-you wanna ask anything, I’m right over there.” 

“Ah, that’s okay, Y/n. Your mother told me everything I need to know. Your bedtime is at eight and no midnight snacks!” 

Your heart drops down to the floor as you immediately encountered a wave of emotions. Why did it matter?! Why did your mom had to apply all these stupid rules when she’s not even around? You thought at the start that you’ll have some kind of freedom when your parents aren’t here, thinking that your nanny might be easier, but perhaps not. 

“Okay.” You say simply. 

How else can you prove to people that you can be better? You're sick of everyone seeing you as the boring one, but your parents were the only thing that was keeping you from having fun. So you decide to be a little risky. 

Step one: Sneak out the house. 

Isn't that what people your age do? Usually they sneak out to party, to go hang out with their friends and have the time of their life. But you had none, no ‘best friend’, but a couple of lunch friends here and there. 

“I should try clubbing.” You mumble to yourself as you sit down on the plush comfort of your mattress. Until you hear your phone chimes, signalling a text. You grab your phone from the bedside table and frown when you see who the text was from. 

Mom: Remember to go to church later, Y/n. 

You didn't reply, instead, it got you thinking. 

Nothing will happen if you skip church, right? You've always attended Mass every Sunday with your parents, so there's absolutely nothing wrong with skipping at least once.

Besides, you need to plot your plans for tonight!

~

“What is this girl doing?” Armaros says in a deep whisper, his well-shaped eyebrows furrowing deeply while he watches Y/n on her phone, laying down on her bed as if church isn't just five minutes away from starting. 

Armaros rushes to the other side of the room to get a better view of her human who lays on her stomach, a white wisp of smoke trailing behind him. He shakes his head, crossing his arms together in front of his chest. “Y/n, Y/n,” he tuts, “What are you doing?!” 

He decides to step forward and reaches forward for his hand to caress the crown of your head. He chuckles when he sees your eyes expand in a quick second, your body abruptly sitting up straight from the tingling feeling in your neck. Your hairs stand up, a chill running down your spine. 

This was Armaros’ way of mustering his presence onto you. Your dad always taught that whenever you suddenly feel a chilling sensation out of nowhere, it means that your guardian angel is there with you and trying to send you a message. 

And you clearly know what he's trying to say. 

There was a slight feeling of guilt – uneasiness, even. But no. You've already decided that you weren't going to follow your old routine. 

Armaros’ jaw drops when you don't move from your position on the bed, only making yourself comfortable even further. ”Don’t you dare skip church...” he slowly whispers to himself. But he quickly shakes his head side to side, trying to be optimistic, “It's just one time. Just one time.” 

Time passes by faster than you think, you sink your teeth down on your bottom lip, chewing on it as you try to Google clubs near you. It was ridiculous, feeling so overwhelmed from all of the options the Internet is showing you. 

There was a generous list of bars and clubs with different ratings. It was a humane decision to choose the best one, right? So you went for a nightclub called ‘Soap Seoul’. Although, you feel your stomach churn when you scroll through the images attached to it; seeing all of the strange blue and red LED lights, big and tight crowds, and an HD picture of their bar. The bar was long and almost occupied the width of the whole club. You don't even know if you can stand such a place like that. 

But no. You can't back out now! You had to show yourself and to others that you can have some fun too. 

~ 

The club opens tonight at 8 pm, letting yourself have two hours to prepare. Rummaging through your garments of clothing, you try to find an appropriate outfit.

“I have nothing!” you whined, eyebrows furrowing in dismay. All you had were simple t-shirts and countless skinny jeans and leggings. Your dresses were almost knee-length and suitable for church – not for a nightclub! 

Armaros stands at a distance, shaking his head at you. 

Until, you heard a loud knock on the door, “Y/n!” May's voice shouts from the other side of the room, “Dinner's ready!” 

Oh no. 

Quickly opening the door, you stared at her with big, worried eyes. “May! I-uhh, I-I’m not gonna stay for dinner…” you mumbled, looking at the ground. 

“Oh, why is that?” she asks, a faint sad tone in her voice. You felt so sad and regretful that you didn't say anything to her because she already cooked your dinner. 

“I-I have plans for tonight,” you hold your hands behind your back, slightly getting embarrassed. 

“Are you going out with your friends?”

“Y-Yeah!” You lie. You've never lied before. 

“Ah, I understand. Have you told your mom?” 

She doesn't have to know. 

“Yup.” 

And there it was again, the chills in your neck appeared while your arm and leg hairs stood up. Armaros touches your scalp, desperate to seek your attention and bring you back to your old, good self. The angel didn't like that you were lying, for he was perpetually accustomed to your good deeds. It was making him anxious for what's about to come. 

But you ignored his message. May nods when you told her that she can have the food to herself. 

You feel a pang of guilt rush through your body when you shut the door behind you, your heartbeat suddenly racing faster. The nervousness in you made your head hurt. Is this the right thing to do? No. It wasn't. But you had to show people that you can be different. Will it be worth it? Of course. 

Thankfully, you spot a white dress that you've never worn before. It was a gift from your cousins that was supposed to be another addition to your collection of church dresses but it was too short for your liking. 

“Hm, maybe this will work…” you quietly mumble to yourself.

You tried the piece of clothing on, carefully examining your reflection in the full-length mirror. The hem of the skirt falls right above your mid-thigh, too high for your usual comfort but for the sake of dressing up for a nightclub — there was no problem. The dress was snug, hugging your body so that it accentuates your curves.

The dress was plain white and was relatively simple. You don't really know what people usually wear for nightclubs but you were certain that dresses were a part of the code. 

You looked for your black three-inch heel that you last wore during your highschool graduation, slipping it in carefully. Doing a little bit of makeup and applying a thin layer of lip gloss, you grabbed a purse and walked out of your room. 

“May, please don't wait for me, okay?” you say after walking past her. 

“W-Wait, I'm supposed to–”

“It's okay. I'll be okay.”

“She's not gonna be okay!” Armaros declares, kneeling on one knee before Archangel Michael – the protector and the spiritual warrior, as he mentions Y/n's recent mischiefs.

After you've been to the nightclub the first day, you've never stopped. You became addicted. 

Sometimes you don't even tell May that you're going out, you just sneak out of the window and let May worry about you. You've happened to know how to drink as you get wasted every single night, hanging around with people that you don't know, people that are a bad influence on your good side. These past few days had you acting up like you’ve never before. You longed for alcohol and the feeling of it numbing your nerves, and there’s not a day where you didn’t get drunk.

Armaros’ power wasn't enough to stop you. Every single day he's been drying his best to send signals, to make you feel certain ways and speak to your consciousness that what you are doing is by far dangerous and wrong. But you never listened. 

You've skipped church, stopped talking to God, ignoring your parents’ phone calls, not doing your homework just because you're busy either getting drunk or making out with someone at the club. It's like you have been addicted to misbehaving. 

But for you, you thought you’re doing the right thing. 

“Armaros, are you doubting your powers?” Archangel Michael replies, running his fingertips along the sharp blade of his sword. 

“N-No, but, nothing seems to work. She's been ignoring my calls for almost two weeks. I just want the best for her.” Armaros’ voice fades at the end of his sentence. He was speaking with such sincerity because he really cares for Y/n. He truly loves her. “Why is she doing this?” He asks for help.

“Because, my dear, she's trying to prove something she's not for other people.”

“What?” 

Archangel Michael laughs quietly, staring at him endearingly. He points his sword at him, “She obviously tries to be immoral to fit in. She's rarely praying to God like she used to, rarely respecting the people around her. Ever since humans bullied Y/n for being herself – she starts to change. But the question is…”

He walks around Armaros, his eyes never leaving his. “Is this making her happy?” 

Armaros lowers his head and shakes his head. “I don’t know.” 

The Archangel grins and returns his sword back on the scabbard attached to his belt. 

“If I can't warn her to stop, then who else can?” The angel asks. 

Michael lifts an eyebrow up, crossing his arms together as he stands right in front of him. His mouth draws into a slow smirk, a hint of playfulness in his eyes as if a lightbulb appeared on top of his head. 

“You wanna have some fun, Armaros?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Stand up, stand up.” Armaros quickly obeys his superior’s command. The Archangel places a hand on his right shoulder, preparing to speak. 

“I have an idea. We call Jeon Jungkook up and–” 

“No! Absolutely not! I will not allow Y/n to come face to face with the son of Lucifer!” Armaros bellows, instinctively pushes Michael's hand away from him. 

“Armaros! It's just an idea!” Michael chuckles, spreading his arms to the side as he shakes his head. “And besides, I have to ask permission from our Highness anyway.” 

“And what will he do? Taunt her? Provoke Y/n to be more sinful?” Y/n's guardian angel asks, referring to Jungkook. “We both know how manipulative and cunning he can be!”

“No, no. We'll make a deal with him, of course! No devil will do anything without receiving something in return.” 

“This idea of yours, not to be rude, but is really out of this world.”

Archangel Michael snorts from the out of the blue pun. 

“Do not be afraid. If our Lord agrees to our plan, I'll be watching. I always will. Give me your trust, Armaros.”

Armaros sighs deeply, yet smiles up at him right after. “Okay, I trust you.” 

“May, stop it,” you mutter angrily, pulling your arm away from her hold. May tries to block your way from going outside the house but you abruptly push her to the side. 

“Y/n! Your mom told you that–” 

“Told me what?! That I’m being independent? Unruly? That I should just stay home? I don’t give a fuck anymore, May. I’d rather hang out with friends than stay here and do nothing!” You bark at her. She was smaller than you and you were definitely giving off that intimidating vibes that you wanted to show. She isn’t the one wearing the pants in this house. You are. 

“Y/n, I will not tolerate this behavior!” May snaps, eyes glaring at you with her hands balled up into fists on her sides. 

Rolling your eyes, you let out a sour chuckle, “You sound like my mom.” 

May sighs deeply, the tiredness in her voice evident, “I’m just trying to keep you safe, Y/n. Just listen to me.” 

“I’m an adult. I can keep myself safe. Now, let me go and don’t wait for me.” 

“Y/n!” 

“Bye May! Have a nice sleep!” 

“Y/n! Where the fuck are you?!” Emilia, one of the new friends you've met no longer than three days ago shouts through the phone as loud, blazing music muffled her voice. “Sophia and I are waiting for you! Get your ass over here!”

“I'm almost there, save me a drink already!” you giggle, looking out from the taxi’s window. 

Sophia snatches the phone out of Emilia’s hand to speak to you, “Y/n, you still remember the bet we made, right?” 

“Of course! It's not a huge deal, c'mon now.” You roll your eyes, faking a laugh. 

“We'll see!” Emilia giggles. 

The driver drops you in front of the nightclub and you throw him a couple of dollars. Stepping out of the car, your high heels clicking on the cement. Upon entering the place, you were immediately greeted with your friends. They were both wearing a tight dress – glittery red and silver – whilst you wore a black one that reached down to your middle thigh. You bought the dress only a day ago, special thanks to your Amazon Prime account . 

“Hey! Here, drink this,” Sophia hands you a single malt whiskey and you swiftly drown it down your throat without any problem. You reminisce back to your first day where you can’t even take a sip of beer without gagging. Now look where you are. 

“Ahh fuck, that tastes good,” you mumble through gritted teeth. 

“Why are you late tonight, Y/n?” Emilia asks as she leads you to the bar to order more alcohol. Her high pitched voice mixing with the loud music,”You know it's always 9 PM. Sharp.” 

You breathe out heavily as you watch Sophia pour three shots of straight vodka into a shot glass. She distributes the beverage to the two of you. 

“Well, uh–” 

“What?” Emilia snaps.

“I couldn't find a goddamn cab, that's why!” you hide your falseness with laughter, hoping they won't sense your lie. 

“Alright anyway, let’s go get wasted and you, Y/n – will be our first player.” Emilia smirks as she crosses her arms together. She analyzes your body, eyeing you up and down. You didn’t like it, and you felt worried. 

Your eyebrows furrow, confused and slightly offended, “What, why me?” You take a sip of your newly-ordered beer, trying to get comfortable on the plush-covered stool. 

“Because,” Sophia answers for her, “we need to know your… capacities.” 

You snort, “Capacities of what? My capacity of having to get into a m-man’s bed? Pffft… easy!” 

Sophia’s forehead furrows, glancing at Emilia with a knowing look before focusing her attention back to you. “Sure. Anyway, let’s have fun first and then…” she leans closer to you, her face inches away from yours. You feel your face redden in embarrassment, “And then you can choose your man.” 

It wasn’t that bad. It isn’t bad dancing around the dance floor, beer in hand, as you danced all your worries away. Emilia and Sophia were out there – somewhere, but you didn’t care about them at this moment. You let your body go with the beat of the loud EDM music, holding your hands up in the air as you whipped your head left to right. You had a huge smile on your face, the alcohol kicking in like it was meant for your body to consume. 

Sweaty bodies were bumping each other from left and right, and you for sure stepped on someone’s toe with your pumps. Nevertheless, you didn’t care. You were having your fun. 

It was until the song changed from upbeat to a more sensual, heart-pumping song from the loud bass. As if there was a switch inside you, you turned into a sultry mess. 

Wasted. You were wasted like hell. 

Your eyes turn into little slits as you look around the dance floor to try and find someone to play with. Taking a huge sip of your drink, your throat burns yet you tried to ignore it. 

“Ah-hah!” you giggle, walking – or should we say, stumbling – towards a guy with black hair parted in the middle, nicely dressed in a black button up tucked in some skinny jeans. The man locks eyes with you, licking his plump lips as his eyes rake your body. 

“Hey there, gorgeous,” he smirks, making you blush in red as he holds your waist and tugs you closer to him. The song in the background was helping you a lot to get into that seductive, sexy mood that you planned to have. 

“Hey,” you smile up at him, “I’m Y/n.” 

“What a pretty name for a pretty lady.” He starts swaying your body to the beat, going along with you. “I’m Seokjin. Nice to meet you.” 

Seokjin tugs your body closer until he holds the back of your head with one hand, making you look deep into his dark eyes. “Y-You’re a new face,” you slur, “You don’t belong here.” 

Unexpectedly, your eyes grow big when Seokjin throws his head back as he laughs almost hysterically. “What?” you question. 

The man slightly leans down until his face draws near to yours, and you can immediately smell the alcohol in his breath. You didn’t judge though, you probably had beer-breath too. 

“Baby girl…” Seokjin suddenly speaks deeply, making your heart jump from the sudden change in his voice. There was a sultry look in his eyes that made it hard for you to keep eye contact. “Baby it’s you who doesn’t seem to belong. You don’t know who I am.” 

“Well y-you don’t know me e-either!” You try to retaliate, although it was messed up with your embarrassing stuttering.  

“You really wanna know?” he whispers, his lips right against your lips, almost touching yours. You couldn’t breathe properly, wanting to pull away but his intoxicating scent was forcing you to him. 

You nod your head, not trusting your voice. 

“I own this place, baby.” 

You almost tossed your cup right across the room from his sudden confession, totally not expecting such a young-looking man to own such a place like this. Your eyes expand, body staying still. 

’Wait! Be sexy… be sexy…’ you thought to yourself after an awkward five seconds of silence. 

You decide to chuckle, biting your bottom lip slowly as you draw yourself nearer to him. He lifts a brow up in surprise, wrapping his arms around your hips and he closes the distance between the two of you. 

“Really? Well then,” you mutter, “I want you to own me too.” 

“Oh, finally. Someone straightforward.” 

“Well I – oh!” Seokjin takes you by surprise when he quickly tugs your arm and leads you to the second floor of the club. You haven’t been in this area before, looking so luxurious and well decorated. Although what shocks you is the series of doors that passes through a long, wide hallway. 

“Seok...Seokjin,” you whisper, but he looks at you with a smirk, a playful glint in his eyes. 

“C’mon baby,” he opens a door and walks you inside, locking it behind him. “Let’s have a little fun.” 

Let’s have a little fun. 

Yeah. I should. 

This is fun, right? 

Before you can even process things, Seokjin shoves your body to a wall as his hands start to wander down your sides. With flushed cheeks, you look at him like you’ve just seen a ghost but he clearly doesn’t mind, grinding his hips into yours. 

“Mmm, what a cute babe I have in front of me,” he groans, leaning forward to pepper wet, gentle kisses all over your neck and down to your shoulders. 

Something feels off. 

“Y/n, right?” he asks, his forehead furrows and you nod. “Can I kiss you?”

Your heart starts to rapidly pump inside your chest, feeling as if it’ll burst at any minute. An uncomfortable feeling starts to overwhelm your system, sensing your palms getting sweaty. You can’t look at his eyes, looking anywhere but him. 

“Uh, o-okay,” you straighten your back as you try your best to look confident. 

This is the perfect opportunity to tell your friends. Having sex with someone like him will absolutely impress Emilia and Sophia. 

Seokjin chuckles, shrugging, “Alright then.” And without any warning, he throws you on the bed and he quickly hovers above your body. 

“Mmph–!” he immediately presses his lips into yours before you can even react to everything that had just happened. He caresses your cheeks with both hands, his lips moving softly with yours. You try your best to keep up with him and his pace, but you can’t. There was something stopping you from giving him your all. Seokjin grunts nevertheless, humping you. 

Seokjin’s right hand snakes down to grab the hem of your dress as he teasingly pulls the fabric up, then lets it snap back down. There was a weird feeling inside your stomach, and it did not feel good at all. 

His hand slowly starts creeping up your leg, and that’s where you couldn’t hold it back. 

“Mmm, n-no,” you mewl, pushing him away from you. Seokjin stares down at you with a frown, head tilted to the side. 

“Y/n?” 

Rapid heart rate, the back of your neck sweating, and chills all over your body occur all at the same time. You were panicking. 

“I-I…” immediately you stand up from the bed, hiking your stupid short dress down as much as you can. “S-Sorry,” furiously shaking your head from side to side, you stumble your way to the door. 

“Y/n, wait!” Seokjin yells, confused yet he felt sorry at the same time. “Let’s talk about it!” 

“No,” you whisper. You can’t do this anymore. There was no energy left in your body to talk, to process what just happened, to stand in this fucking club. Home. All you were thinking about was going home. 

You twist the doorknob open, trying to catch your breath as much as you can but you feel like you were going to pass out any minute. Making your way down the stairs, you run as fast as you can towards the exit of the nightclub yet a person catches your arm. 

“Y/n!” Your eyes widen when Emilia and Sophia stop you, observing your state. “What’s wrong with you?” 

“No…” you breathe tirelessly, “c-can’t do it…” 

“You failed?” Emilia snaps as she leans her body on one hip, resting her hands there. She looks at you with disgust, “But we saw the guy that you’re with! He was hot!” 

Sophia snorts, smirking as she stares at you sourly, “Proves our point. You’re nothing, Y/n. You had such an easy job, the guy’s already all over you and you just had to throw him? Where is he, let me get with him myself.” Sophia struts away, heels clicking as she flips her long hair over her shoulder, leaving you with Emilia. 

“What can I say, Y/n,” she smiles menacingly, the corners of her eyes crinkling, “You can never be like us.” 

Your whole body felt heavy, heavy like you were carrying a boulder behind your back. This isn’t what you had planned at all, everything was going so well until this! Your eyes started welling up with tears, blurring your sight. You had to go. 

Without saying a word, you quickly run away to the exit, ignoring Emilia’s insensitive laugh. 

What went wrong? Why did you feel that way? Negative thoughts were clouding your mind as you cried and cried to your poor, soaked pillow. 

Maybe you are just not enough. Perhaps you’re not meant to be like this. 

It was fun the first time around, and you were actually enjoying yourself. But the days passed and you sadly weren't doing this for your own pleasure anymore, but for the validation of other people. 

You should’ve stopped Seokjin from touching you when it clearly made you uncomfortable. There was a line and he crossed it, but you erased that line so you can finally say that you’ve slept with someone. But you guessed it wasn’t that easy. 

Grabbing your phone, you ignored all of the rude messages Emilia has sent you, blocking her and Sophia’s number. You turned off your phone, throwing it somewhere on the ground without care before you switched off your lamp. There was never a time that you’ve cried yourself to sleep, but tonight was your first. 

“And what do I get in return for this deal?” Jeon Jungkook purrs with a low, dark tone, crossing his legs together as he sits on his father’s fire-blazing throne. Even though he has his own throne for himself, thrones on fire were way cooler. He scans the frightened angel from head to toe through the strands that fell in front of his eyes. 

“The A-Archangel says you will obtain a soul. A soul that is longing for hell.” Armaros stutters as he tries to keep eye contact with the devil’s hard glare. 

Jungkook chuckles, hanging his head low. “You mean to tell me…” he starts to stand up and walks towards the angel. Armaros tries his best to keep his guard up and stand as tall as possible. 

Jungkook circles around him, arms crossed while his right hand plays with his bottom lip, “That I should convince this little girl to prevent doing bad, bad things to stop her from going to hell?” He laughs hysterically. “That’s quite… an unnatural job for a devil, isn’t it? It’s completely the opposite of what i’m supposed to do. Tell Michael that his plan is utter bullshit.”

Armaros takes a deep sigh, closing his eyes for a brief second before replying. “Firstly, Y/n is not a little girl. And second, this job is easy. You have the skill to persuade humans to sin – what’s hard with doing the opposite? Besides, you’ll obtain a soul either way.” 

His words made Jungkook ponder and deliberate with himself. He stops in front of Armaros and shows him his signature imposing smile. “I can have my way with the girl, right?” He bites his lip, “Anyway I want?” 

This made Armaros’ eyes go wide, mouth opening but no words seem to come out properly, “I-I… w-well, um… yes? Yes? P-Perhaps? Just don’t do anything bad to her.” 

Jungkook scoffs, running his long tongue over his teeth as he smirks, “Define bad, Mr. Angel.” 

“You know… hurt her.” He gulps.

The devil squints his eyes, absolutely loving Armaros’ reactions. “Oh, don’t worry. I’m not gonna kill her, if that’s what you mean.” 

“I’m done with this conversation.” Armaros quickly chirps as he unfolds his large, white wings. “Remember what your main goal is, Jungkook. I’m counting on you.” 

Jungkook stops him before he flies back up. “Armaros…” he says, dragging his name long in his tongue. Armaros looks at him, eyes impatient, arms crossed together. 

“You know I’m a devil, right?” 

The angel chuckles, scoffing, “Oh, I know that alright.” He scorns, eyeing Jungkook up and down. Although the devil in front of him looks intimidating and his eyes are jet black, Armaros keeps his calm. “I’m only following orders. I didn’t agree with The Archangel in the first place.” 

“Do you know what devils do to… humans?” 

Armaros nods fully. 

“And what I might do to… that precious little girl?” Jungkook growls deeply, walking closer to him. He tilts his head down, looking at him through his lashes, “There’s a huge chance that I might not control myself when I see her.” 

“What do you mean?” 

Suddenly, black smoke appears from Jungkook’s right hand, summoning something beside him. The smoke appears to subside and at once, Y/n’s appearance can be seen through the thin air. Jungkook rests his hips on one side, twirling his hand so that her image spins around. 

“This is Y/n, right?” Jungkook studies your face, watching you read a book inside your room. “I’ve never seen someone so beautiful before.” 

“Jeon Jungkook!” Armaros bellows, his tone loud yet sprinkled with fear. 

“I’m just saying, Angel. You can’t stop me from trying to do devilish things to her.” Jungkook smirks, prodding his tongue on the inside of his cheek. “You might have to reconsider this deal of yours if you don’t want me to have my way with that pretty little girl,” He taunts, already warning Armaros.

“Jungkook,” Armaros’ nerves seem to heat up, slowly getting irritated although he tries to calm himself. He looks down, shaking his head as he pinches the bridge of his nose in annoyance. “There’s no point in doing that. You think she wants to have an affair with someone like you?” 

The devil laughs loudly as he twirls his hand until your image disappears. This conversation further proves Jungkook’s argument that angels are actually dumber than they realize. 

“If you want me to help you, I will have my way with her. My job, my rules. Understand?”

Armaros feels defeated, but he can’t say anything but nod and agree to him. He can’t fight him anyway. Jungkook dismisses him, and with that, the angel ascends back up to earth. 

Jungkook can’t wait to have his fun. 

~

Prancing around, making friends, getting to know each other – Jungkook doesn’t want to do that. Instead, he’s very straightforward, saying words that he probably shouldn’t, he likes to say what he thinks no matter how bad it’ll probably hurt. 

That’s what he plans to do with you. 

If he gets his point clear, make you frightened, scare the shit out of you, then the job would be complete. 

Easy! 

You were currently on your laptop, scrolling through your pinterest tabs until you hear loud and frantic knocks on your door. “Y/n!” May shrieks, her voice quivering. “Someone’s at the door!” 

Oh no, you thought. 

Immediately hopping out of bed, you went out to see who it was with May following behind you. You peak out through the windows and suddenly, you inhale sharply from the man that you see. 

He was unfamiliar. Thankfully, it wasn’t Seokjin or Sophia nor Emilia, but rather tall, might you say handsome looking man waiting outside your doorstep. He was dressed in all black, his hair covering his eyes. 

“Do you know him?” May asks quietly. You shake your head slowly, “N-No.” 

“Y/n… I think you should just leave him.” 

“May, I can handle it. You can go now.” You say softly to her. 

“Are you sure—”

“Yes.” You spat a little harshly, blazing your eyes at her. May nods, sighing as she walks away to her room. 

Gathering the courage to open the door, you took a deep inhale and exhale, calming your nerves. 

Once you open the door, your eyes immediately fly to his dark ones. Your whole body suddenly shivers, the air around the place somewhat getting cold as if it was winter. 

You can't take your eyes off of the man. You have never met him before but it felt like you've known him for too long. There was a strange aura surrounding the two of you that you can't explain. 

“Hello.” He speaks first, giving you a sly smile. 

His voice. You've never heard such a dark and menacing timbre before. 

“Hi,” you gulp, “Who are you?” 

“May I come in?” Jungkook snaps, ignoring your question. He doesn't want to waste any time, that's for sure. 

You furrow your brows as you shake your head, “Answer my question first.” You blurt, blocking the entrance by placing your hands on either side of the doorway. 

“Hm,” Jungkook slowly shows you a deadly smirk, eyeing your body up and down. “You really wanna know?” 

What kind of a question is that? 

You quickly got annoyed, looking at him with a scorn. “Obviously!”

Feisty, Jungkook thought. 

“I'm the devil.”

There was a long pause, silence filling the air. This man is too handsome to be this dumb. You laugh hysterically, bending over as you hold your aching stomach. “A-Are you… oh my god… please tell me you're fucking joking!” you say with creased eyes. 

Jungkook already expected this reaction, and he only rolls his eyes without you noticing. 

“Mhm. You don't believe me?” he slowly pronounces his words, voice deep and sinister. 

“Nah,” you shake your head, giggling. 

“Aren't you religious?” Jungkook pushes you to the side without hesitation and enters, your eyes expanding slowly as his body suddenly comes in contact with yours. “Don't you believe in your God? You believe in angels, right?” He backs your body up and shuts the door loudly behind him. 

You felt a series of chills erupt from your system, his gaze locked on yours. You wanted to look away from his intimidating gaze, but you can't, for some strange reason. “Huh, Y/n?”

You gasp. “Wait, h-how do you know my name!?” 

Jungkook smirks at you, tilting his head to the side as he ignores your question again. 

Your body seems to move by itself, like you can't control your own limbs. The air thickens around the two of you as you feel your body submit to the man in front of you. 

Sighing, with a shaky voice you answer. “I do. I do believe in them.”

Although what shocks you is the way his eyes suddenly turn a bright shade of red. From deep black to red, his irises glow. 

“What the fuck–” you quickly back away, body shivering in fear until your back hits a wall. You rub your eyes, trying to see if your mind was only playing tricks with you. 

Jungkook grins and chuckles darkly, clicking his tongue. “Then…” he draws, walking closer to your frightened figure, “Can this convince you enough?” 

“S-Stop… stop playing games with me!” you whimper, feeling your palms get sweaty. “Your eyes are red!” 

“Hmm, I wonder why,” Jungkook snarls, forehead creasing, “Maybe because I'm the fucking devil?” 

And in a flash, Jungkook’s appearance changes from a tall, handsome boy into a dark red figure. Black, bat-like wings sprout from his back, long horns appearing from his forehead, a spear-like tail behind him. His lips and the area around his eyes were tinted in black while his fingers grew longer, sharper. 

You almost fainted then and there. 

“Oh— p-please,” your eyes turn watery as tears start to fall down your cheek, lifting your hands up to your mouth in shock, “please d-don't kill me!” Shutting your eyes to avoid the frightening image in front of you, your knees drop down to the floor with a loud thud. “I'm sorry, please f-forgive me! Don't k-kill me! Please!” 

“Oh, what a cute pretty girl you are,” the devil grins, his voice more gravelly now. He looks down at your frail self, amused. “I'm not here to kill you. I'm here to teach you a lesson.” 

You start to sob as your body shakes, “No! Please d-don't…”  

“Do you believe me now?”

“Yes! Yes I do!” you quickly reply, voice cracking. “I’m sorry s-sir, don’t hurt me!” 

Jungkook, satisfied with your reaction, morphs back to his normal human look within a few seconds. “Look at me.”

Slowly, afraid to anger the devil in front of you, you obey his words. You sigh in relief when he finally looks normal again, but you can't look at him the same way. 

“Stand up.”

You do so with wobbly legs. You felt so weak with your energy quickly drained so quickly. Wiping your tear-stained cheeks, you try your best to keep your composure. 

“Anyway, I'm Jungkook,” he gives you an award-winning smile, “I'm sent here to supposedly warn you from doing bad things.” He cringes, shaking his head. “Which, honestly speaking, I think is atrocious.”

He scans your body, biting his lip right after. “A good looking girl like you should have her fun.” 

You try to regain your senses back. A devil — a real devil appeared right in front of you. You can't seem to shake the thought away while he’s there looking so handsome in his human form. 

With a shaky breath, you ask him, “J-Jungkook? I'm really sorry. I don't know what I'm doing.” 

He snorts. Brushing his black hair away from his face. “Wrong. You know what you're doing.” 

“W-What?” 

Something in the air changes when Jungkook snaps his fingers. A thick, black smoke appears, capsuling the both of you in. “What is this?!” you question, terror overtaking your face. You watch your surroundings getting blurry, blackness covering the area. 

“Oh nothing,” he gives you a lopsided grin, “just making sure that your little angels can't see us.” 

Jungkook's eyes shine and his pupils enlarge, smiling as you notice how his teeth grow sharper. There were veins popping out in his neck, grimacing at you in pure excitement.  

“We can't afford your poor, guardian angel to stop us now, can't we? I don't want him to see us…playing.” 

“Playing?!” You gasp, eyes expanding in shock.. 

“Yes, baby. Angels are so fucking dumb, aren't they? Asking a devil to do their own work? Isn't that pathetic.”

You were locked to him like a magnet as your body seems to fill with utter desire in such a quick time. 

Was he doing something to you?!

A series of pleasurable chills erupt from your body, mouth getting dry as you look up at Jungkook with big eyes. 

His hand suddenly touches your bare arm, making you silently mewl from his chilling touch. He smirks at your reaction, “How dumb of them to trust the son of Lucifer himself.”

“Y-You… you're…” your voice fades, trying to process his words. 

“Mhm. Aren't you excited to play with me?” 

Maybe he's doing tricks to your mind, controlling your body – or maybe you’re just fucked up. Either way, you want him. 

You lust for him. 

“Yes.”

Jungkook draws his lower lip between his teeth, his hands finding its way to your waist, holding you firmly until he unexpectedly pulls you to his body. He lifts a single eyebrow up, “Really?” 

Your heartbeat quickens. 

“I've… I’ve never been more sure.” Words seem to spill out of your mouth without your consent, as if it wasn’t you who’s speaking. But you don’t try to take your words back.  

Jungkook laughs and starts to lift you up without struggle, finding his way to your bedroom while the smoke follows the two of you. “Bad, bad girl you are.” He lowers you down on the mattress, sending you a seductive wink, “I'm so fucking proud.” 

He preps himself on his knees, capturing your thighs in between. His eyes run down your body, chills running down your spine from how hot he looks. His figure was so big and muscular, making you feel like he can destroy your frail self. 

“Look at this, you look so fucking delicious baby.” 

His hand suddenly flies down to your armpits, roughly handling you as he carries you up as he sits down on the bed, his back pressed against the headboard, as he places you in between his legs. 

You hold back a whimper as he pushes your body closer to him. Hearing him growl deeply made your cunt throb, feeling a strange wet feeling down there. 

“Demons can't help humans,” he mutters lowly, his lips right against the shell of your ear. “They want you to sin and sin and sin until the day you fucking die.” 

His hands play with your shirt until in a quick flash, he rips the cotton material in half, your body shivering as it has been exposed to the cold air. “Ohh,” you whimper, covering your body with your arms. 

“Nu-uh,” Jungkook grins behind you, “Don't do that, baby.” He leans down and starts pressing wet and sloppy kisses all over your shoulders, running his mouth up to your neck. “Don't try to hide away from me.”

He sucks on the soft skin of your neck, his big dick throbbing in his pants from the way you were constantly squirming. You were so sensitive, and it made him so horny. He hums, marking your skin in bright red and purple bruises. 

“Ahh, Jungkook,” you moan, throwing your head back until it rests right against his shoulder. 

His hands suddenly fly to your breasts, his long and slender fingers pinching and twisting your hardened nipples. You bite your bottom lip as you can't seem to open your eyes from the feeling. It was until Jungkook suddenly digs his nails into your nipples, pinching them roughly that made you jolt right up. 

“Oh, t-that hurts,” you cry, the stinging feeling of his sharp nails pinching your buds. Jungkook watches your face contort, digging his nails even harder. He feels your body twitch, hearing your gentle whines and mewls. 

“Ohhh you don't like it baby, does it hurt too much for your sensitive, precious body?” he mocks a concerned tone. “Hm?” 

He was playing games with you, that's for sure. You nod your head up and down, trying to push his hands away. “Mhm…” 

Thankfully, he does stop but he quickly cups your breasts with both hands. He feels your rock-hard nipples pushing against his rough palms, kneading your boobs until he finally lets go. 

“Take these off,” he instructs you to pull your shorts down, and you do so. With trembling hands, you swiftly tug them off of your legs. 

“Mmm, fuck,” he grunts behind you, his right hand lowering down from your stomach until it reaches the destination right against your clothed pussy. His fingers slowly trace down your slick, feeling how wet you are through your panties. 

He smirks cockily, “You're fucking drenched, baby. Are you this horny?” he rubs your clit in slow, circular motions with just the right amount of pressure with the tips of his two fingers, your legs shivering. “Want something to stuff that little hole of yours?” 

He pulls your underwear down to your thighs, and you instantly shake it off with your legs. Jungkook pushes your legs apart, forcing your knees up with your feet flat on the mattress. Your cunt flutters around air from the exposure. You whine when his left arm possessively wraps around your stomach, his biceps flexing when he holds you tightly. 

“Stay fucking still,” he growls, his warm hand cupping your bare cunt. He chuckles, prodding his tongue against his cheek as he plays with your folds. He uses two slender fingers to spread your labia apart and you can feel your glistening arousal drip from your hole down to your ass. 

Jungkook hums in satisfaction, spreading your lips wider, making you emit a moan. “Jungkook—”

“No. I want you to call me something…” he elongates the pause in his sentence to suddenly insert the tip of his middle finger in your pussy, causing you to jump. “Something else, baby.” 

“Ah-ahh, what?” your legs couldn't stop trembling as he pushes his finger deeper, your walls sucking it in deliciously. 

You can feel him smirk against the skin of your neck, he snickers, “Starts with the letter D.” 

Your eyes squint in confusion, tilting your head up to look at him. Jungkook, with his glowing red eyes, scans your face with a quirked eyebrow expectantly. 

“Devil?” 

Jungkook scoffs loudly and instantly pushes the rest of his finger in your cunt, immediately pumping in and out at a rapid pace. Your hands quickly hold onto his arm that was wrapped around you, mouth agape from the sudden thrusts. “Ohhh!” your body shakes, leaning your head against him. Electric waves of pleasure run through your body, being new to the sensation. 

He growls as he removes his finger out to slap your pussy harshly, hitting your sensitive clit. “Wrong.” 

“Oww…” you mewl, your hips bucking up from the sting. He does this again, and again, and again, making your eyes watery. He tightens his hold on you, stopping you from squirming too much. 

“Daddy.” He purrs. 

Your body instantly feel a series of shivers. 

“Call me daddy.” Jungkook bites your neck roughly while he inserts his digits back, this time using his middle and ring finger. You hiss in pleasure, eyes tempting to roll back when he brushes the sponge-like texture inside your pussy. 

“Shit, right there daddy,” you curse, rolling your hips against his hand for more. “Right there!” 

Jungkook feels his cock harden even more, precum dripping down his tip as it twitches against his clothes. The way you pronounce that certain word drove him crazy. Jungkook loves how your body easily crumbles beneath him as you allow him to have all the control. He pounds your pussy faster with his hand, putting his bicep to good use. 

You were about to cum, the feeling of a tightness inside your tummy, a ball about to burst at any second. You warn Jungkook, “Daddy, i-i think… I think I'm gonna c-cum,” you sob. 

“I know.” He says simply, fucking you harder. Suddenly, he pushes his index finger in, three digits stretching your walls out. You cry loudly, thrashing around him as high-pitched moans carelessly leave your mouth. “Shiiiiit, d-daddy!” 

“Need to stretch this little pussy out for my cock” he purrs, “cuz’ we don’t want that tiny hole of yours to split into two, right baby?” 

Your toes curl, nails digging into the skin of his arm as you fail to warn him that you're gonna cum any second now. Although he can feel the way your pussy was pulsing around his long fingers. He angled his hand until your clit was brushing against his palm, “Daddy! Ohh fuck, just l-like that!”

Until it all stops. 

All of the pleasure stops when Jungkook pulls his fingers out. 

“Fuuuuuuuck!” you yell, never been more frustrated before as he denies your orgasm. You were about to cum so hard. Your legs shake uncontrollably, scratching his arms as your body shudders. Your poor cunt pulsates rapidly from the sour loss. You were a whimpering, sobbing mess. 

Laughing dryly behind you was Jungkook, licking his fingers clean as he watches your dignity wash away right in front of his eyes. 

“Fuck you,” you scowl, pushing away his arms and turning to face him. “Fuck. You.” 

But he wasn't bothered at all, of course. He was the devil after all. He had no remorse.

Before you know it, Jungkook wraps his hand around your throat and swiftly pulls you close to his face. You gulp, terrified from the intimidating look in his eyes. 

Jungkook thinks that he can easily kill you then and there. If it were a different person, he wouldn't hesitate to snap their neck like a stick. Usually he would feel tempted to physically hurt a person in this kind of situation. But no. He likes you. He likes you too much to kill.

“Take my cock out.”

Even though you hate him for denying your orgasm so brutally like that, you nod your head. Jungkook removes his shirt as you scoot down. You were careful to unbutton his pants, heart rate going faster from the thought of seeing his cock right in front of your face. By the look of the large tent evident, he was gonna be huge. Jungkook watches you with heavy eyes, running his hand through your hair softly. 

You pull the garment down and your mouth visibly waters from the sight. The outline of his cock was evident from his briefs, long and thick and was certainly rock hard. You were so afraid to even touch it as you let your hands sit right on his thighs. 

“Haven't done this before?” he asks, rubbing your cheek with one hand. You shake your head, afraid to look at his glaring eyes. 

Jungkook chortles, quickly pulling his underwear down by himself.

His cock immediately springs out and rests on his abdomen. With wide, surprised eyes, you notice his red tip leaking so much precum, dripping down his abs. You involuntarily whine and wiggle your hips in need, your wetness dripping down your thigh. 

“Take it in your mouth.” He orders, voice strict and demanding. 

“But—” 

“Did I stutter?” 

“No daddy.” You whisper, looking away and finally gathering the courage to wrap your hands around his girth. You clench your thighs together when you feel him against your palm – warm and heavy, yet the skin was soft at the same time. When you stroke his shaft up and down watching how his precum pours down to your hands, providing you lubrication as it coats his cock. 

Jungkook throws his head back as he smiles down at you, feeling so good. He bucks his hips up repeatedly, meeting your timid strokes. 

His patience runs out and slaps your hand away, gripping his cock tightly. Suddenly, he slaps his dick on your cheek, making lewd and wet sounds. “Open your fuckin’ mouth.” 

Obeying his command, you wrap your lips around his leaking tip. You taste the saltiness of his seed on your tongue, trying your best to take more of him. His thick girth was making it hard for you as your jaw immediately feels sore. 

His hand flies to grip your hair, making you whine around his cock, causing vibrations. “Look at that pretty little mouth tryna’ take this cock,” he smirks, “Go deeper baby. Gag around my cock if you don't wanna be punished.” 

Your hips swivel in need from his words, pussy soaking like a river. You slack your jaw as you sink down on his cock, trying to ignore the harsh gags when his tip hits the back of your throat. Jungkook growls loudly above you, seeing that the corners of your mouth were dripping in saliva. 

He uses both of his hands to force you deeper. Your eyes start to water when you swallow just half of his big dick, already being too much for you. The harsh and wet gagging sounds were music to Jungkook's ear, loving to see you struggle. “Mhm, fuck yes,” he grunts, “Choke on that big dick.” 

He keeps you down there, feeling sinister as his devilish instincts get the best of him. He ignores your cries and pleads, only focusing on the feeling of the sweet vibrations whenever you moaned around him. Or whenever your throat closes around his shaft when you choked, it was all too good for him. 

You immediately tapped on his thighs furiously when you can't take it anymore, but what did he do? He starts fucking your mouth with sharp thrusts of his hips. You whimper, closing your eyes tight as your nails dig into the skin of his thighs. He grabs you by your head as he uses your poor mouth for pleasure. 

Trying to breathe through your nose, you ignore the burning sensation in your mouth yet it feels too good. “Ahhhh holy fucking shit,” he grunts, feeling your throat tighten, “Look at that – fuck. Bad little girl aren't you? Mhm? You're my bad, naughty girl.” Jungkook mocks, watching the stream of tears drip down your cheeks. 

Finally, he pulled out and there were thick strings of saliva connecting your lips to his cock. He groans loudly, his cock twitching as it lays back on his stomach. 

“Ohh, c'mere baby girl, come here.” Jungkook whispers and pulls your body close to him. You straddle his lap, feeling his cock beneath your folds that made you hiss. He wraps his strong arms around you, his face inches close to yours. You try not to be intimidated by his menacing eyes, but he notices this and clutches your throat with one hand, squeezing it again that made you inhale sharply. Jungkook sees your pout, your lips bruised from your numerous bites, and he chuckles. 

He tugs you until his lips are right upon your ear. “You wanna cum, baby?” 

Your body shivers from how deep and alluring his voice was, although you nod your head. “Please, daddy.” 

“Oh but do you deserve it? Do you even deserve a cock like mine?” 

You hate how frustrated he can make you. You punch your hands down on his chest, whining, “I-I do…” 

Jungkook quirks a brow up, immediately forcing your hands behind your back. He roughly grasps your wrists together with one hand, surely leaving a red bruise. He bites his lip, “You do?” He swiftly lands a spank on your right ass cheek, making you moan. “Then sink down on my cock.” 

With a puff of your breath, Jungkook helps you align his dick to your sopping entrance. You couldn’t breathe properly, anticipating what will happen as soon as you slowly sink yourself on his thick tip. 

“Ohhh daddy!” Your walls stretch out as you take his tip in, making you feel a harsh, stinging sensation as he rips your walls. If it wasn’t with his impressive girth, it probably wouldn’t hurt as much. Jungkook grunts, his cock throbbing from the feeling of your cunt fluttering around him. 

“Fuck yeah,” he watches your pussy take him further, your juices coating his shaft. He tightens his hold on your wrists, slightly bucking his hips up. Jungkook lands another hard, loud spank. 

“Daddy you're so b-big,” you moan, almost halfway down his dick but you can't take more of him anymore. Jungkook gets turned on from the sweet tone of your voice, the thought of tainting such a girl like you made him chuckle. 

Jungkook feeds himself from the idea of corrupting you, letting you know how it feels to truly rebel. Who the fuck cares about what your parents think? Humans are all going to die anyway, there’s nothing wrong with having a little fun. 

You start to bounce up and down slowly, your pussy rubbing against him, feeling the thick protruding veins upon your walls. You dig your nails onto your palm, eyes closed shut as you prop yourself up to your feet. 

“That's it, baby. Ride daddy's cock,” he insinuates, watching your face contort in pleasure. With your eyebrows knitted together, eyes shut and mouth wide open, Jungkook’s cock throbs inside of you.

“Look at that fucking face, cant take it?” he snickers. 

“I can, I can,” you pant tirelessly, legs getting sore. Your brows drew deeper as you concentrated on the feeling of his cock hitting your sensitive nerves so good, already so close to an orgasm from how big he is. 

But Jungkook wanted more. He wants it harder, rougher. He wants to shoot his hot cum so hard and deep inside your fresh womb, filling you up. He wants to wreck your body until you break. 

So he releases your hands free and instead grabs a hold of your waist firmly, keeping you still. He plants his feet on the bed and starts to thrust his hips up like crazy. 

Your jaw drops into an ‘o’ shape and you release a particular loud squeal. Your hands hold onto his broad shoulder, throwing your head back as he continues to drill your abused cunt. His balls slap against your ass, creating lewd slapping noises. 

“Dadddyyyyy!” you shriek, eyes expanding so wide from the unexpected bliss of electric currents shooting down your spine. You can't handle it, your orgasm snapping in a quick second. “I'm—!” 

Jungkook groans loudly when your pussy squirts your cum all over his dick and gushes all over his stomach. He fucks you through your mind-blowing orgasm, your eyes rolling back to your head as your legs shake from the unexpecting feeling. Your mind seems to cloud in lust as he doesn’t stop fucking you. 

“Shit,” he laughs, “look at this poor little girl.” Jungkook caresses your ass before he spanks it roughly, emitting a whimper from your mouth, kneading the bruised flesh right after. “Squirting all over daddy. You love my big cock so much, huh? You horny, desperate little slut.” 

Before you can even process what he just said, he flips you over until you lay down flat on your stomach. He hovers on top of you, keeping his dick in without pulling out. You yelp as he wraps his big hand around your throat, tightly squeezing your jugular without mercy. 

“A-ahhh oh—” you choke, letting your forehead down to rest on the sheets as he continues to pound you from behind. 

He had absolutely no mercy, using you as his little fucktoy for his pleasure, abusing your pussy like it was made for his demon cock. He chokes you harder, almost making you see stars. 

Your cunt throbs once again, signalling that another orgasm is coming near. “Ohhhh fuck fuck fuck fuck!” you moan, heavy puffs of breath coming out of your mouth every time he thrusts into you. 

Jungkook feels his nerves getting hotter and hotter, his cock aching to cum. He doesn't think of anything else but the way your walls clench so tightly around him. “Gonna break this motherfucking pussy of yours,” he growls, leaning down until his chest presses against your sweaty back. “I'm gonna fucking paint your walls with my cum, baby. You're gonna take all of it, you're gonna take all of daddy's cum in that tight cunt.”

Your legs squirm, hands closing into fists as you hit the bed over and over from how sensitive you become. Your hands claw the sheets tightly, back arching from the breathtaking pleasure. 

“Ahhhh daddy! Ohh my fucking— ahhh yes, yes yes!” your body crumbles, mouth wide open as you scream while you cum for the second time. Your pussy pulses so harshly around his dick, coating it with your juices, making it more wet for him. 

He groans, removing his hand from your throat and slaps your ass again. “Naughty little shit right here.” It was so messy, just how he likes it. His cum covered in your glistening arousal, fucking you through your high. 

He immediately flips you around again, making you face him. He smirks cockily from your flushed chest and face, noticing that you were having trouble opening your eyes. 

He leans down and rests his forearms beside your head, “Take it baby, take it.” he murmurs roughly, his balls getting heavier. “Take my fucking dick.”

Your legs never seem to stop quivering, everything around you seems blurry besides Jungkook's face. How does he still look so handsome and perfect? His black hair falls down his forehead, swaying with every hard thrust, his deep dimples peeking through when he bites his lower lip slowly while he savors the feeling of your warm, wet pussy. 

“Gonna cum in you baby,” he pants, holding your cheek in one hand. “Daddy’s gonna cum so fuckin’ hard for you.” You notice a dark, sinister forming his lips as he looks down at you. There it was again, that intimidating, almost teasing look. 

He growls roughly, hips staying still inside you as he dips down to gnaw at your shoulder. You hiss, whimpering when he sinks his teeth so harshly into your delicate skin, leaving an ugly mark. “Ah-ahh, daddy!” His cock spurts out warm strings of his seed, filling you up to the brim. 

“Mmm, mmm, fuck yeah,” he moans, “take it, Y/n.” 

When he pulls his cock out, his pupils enlarge as he sees your arousal dripping out of your cunt and onto your bed. He chuckles, stroking his cock a couple of times to milk himself furthermore, not wasting any of his sperm.

The two of you were breathless, breathing heavily. Your legs feel so sore and you can't feel them either, your ass stinging from his numerous rough spanks. 

“Clean yourself up, Y/n.” Jungkook suddenly throws you a wet towel, about to ask him where it came from, although he just stares at you blankly with a quirked brow. 

Gulping, you nod and start wiping yourself clean. 

~

He can't leave now. Not after all of this. 

There was something that attracted yourself to him. You can't seem to grasp what it is – but whenever Jungkook looks at you in the eyes, you feel like submitting. 

It was like your body doesn't belong to you anymore. He possesses your body now. 

“Crawl to me, my love.” He whispers, and you were easily drawn to his beautiful eyes. 

Still naked, you do as you're told and crawl towards the edge of the bed where he stands. He wears his pants, thankfully covering his goods. 

He sighs and softly caresses your cheek with a warm hand, making you flutter your eyes shut whilst leaning against his palm. He hums delightfully, smirking. 

“Surrender.” He purrs, eyes drooping down as he looks at you with such gentleness, almost with care. He leans down until your faces are mere inches away from each other. “Surrender to me, my love. And I’ll take you to somewhere you belong.”

Your eyes shimmer, batting your eyelashes as you gawk up at him with eagerness. “W-Where I belong?” you repeat in question.

“Yes, Y/n.” He smiles, showing you his perfect teeth. “Where no one will judge you, no one will criticize you for you. You can be whoever you want, you can do whatever you want. Isn’t that exciting, baby?”

Mouth getting dry, your nerves heat up once again, feeling nothing but anticipation. “Yes.”

Jungkook holds your face in two hands, compelling you to stare unswervingly at his red eyes. “Submit to me, Y/n, and you’ll never worry about this earth’s dreadful problems.” His voice gravelly yet dark, somehow different to his normal human speaking voice. 

You didn’t know what he really means by ‘submit’, or where he was supposed to take you. But your mind was telling you to go. Your consciousness speaks to you like someone was whispering in your ear what to do. You kneel before him, still keeping eye-contact. The air around the two of your shifts and it suddenly grows warm as your body starts to sweat.

“Where are…” your voice was breathy, “Where are you taking me?”

Jungkook starts to chuckle, brushing your hair back with his fingers. Suddenly, your heart races when he presses a tender, wet kiss on your forehead. Your eyes widen, heart beating out of your chest when he continues to kiss you down to the bridge of your nose, until it stops right upon your lips. He hovers his mouth right against yours, feeling his warm breath.

He whispers the words so ominously that goosebumps appear all over your arms and legs. “I’m gonna take you down to hell.” 

Jungkook watches your face go pale, all the blood leaving your face as you gaze at him with such big, surprised eyes. Without warning, he presses his lips against yours. You can’t keep up with him, his kiss rough and dominating. You whimper when his hand goes to wrap itself around your throat, pulling you closer. His tongue easily slips in your mouth, causing you to gasp. Jungkook smirks through the kiss as he controls the way your mouth moves. The two muscles dance together with such need and passion, hands getting sweaty. 

He bites your bottom lip, chewing on the soft flesh while he gently rolls it against his teeth. Jungkook growls, eyebrows furrowing. He can’t seem to get enough of you, wanting you all for himself. He’s addicted to you; your scent, your beautiful eyes, your body, he doesn’t want to leave this earth without you. 

He needs you down with him. 

Jungkook pulls out as he watches your flushed face, all out of breath. There was nothing else that you could do but whine about the loss of his lips. You were craving more of him. You pout, hoping that he’ll give in but Jungkook just shakes his head with a smirk. 

“Answer me, baby. Go down with me, and I’ll treat you so good.” He insinuates, “I’ll treat you like my own fucking queen. Don’t you want that?” 

You nod your head furiously, “I do want that,” you say softly. 

He clicks his tongue, “Tch, louder.” 

“I want it, please. Bring me with you.” Jungkook watches your pupils dilate, growing bigger as you speak. “Please.” 

Jungkook smiles. And within a flash, the black smoke that was encircling the two of you all this time thickens and starts to wash over the two of you. You cough uncontrollably yet Jungkook just stands there and watches. The smoke fills your lungs until you lose consciousness. 

~

Sounds of the crackling fire fills your eardrums, and your body tries to accommodate the scorching heat of your surroundings. 

Opening your eyes, you see that you’re nowhere in your room, or in the overworld. All that your eyes can see was miles and miles of dark red and black hills, huge torches of fire everywhere, scattered all over the place. There were girls and boys dressed in all black outfits, walking around the place with blank faces, eyes having stripped off of their emotions.

You look down on yourself and thankfully, you were wearing clothes. A tight red dress that hugs your body perfectly, enhancing your curves.

“Y/n.”

A soft voice calls out your name, and you whip around to see Jungkook in his demon form, smiling at you as he sits on his throne. You feel a warm, familiar feeling in your heart as if coming home and going to bed from a long trip. His blazing eyes lead you to a trance.

He beckons you to him for he lifts his right hand out to you. He eyes your body up and down, fixing his posture whilst he runs his tongue along his bottom lip. The way your hips gently sways as you make your way towards him – not losing eye contact – and how your irises burn in desire, it was all that Jungkook asks for.

Your legs move without your permission, leading you up the stone steps to his throne.

His hand was warm when you grasp it, although it was rough and almost hard unlike his human skin, you touch as if there was no difference. You weren’t afraid anymore. Jungkook signals you to sit on his lap, and you gladly obey. With legs on either side of his thigh, you straddle him.

“You’re mine, baby.” Jungkook snarls, “This is your place now.”

“I…” you speak for the first time, “I can’t see my friends and family anymore?”

He shakes his head no with a sly grin.

You exhale, a big smile painting your face. You’ve never felt so content and happy in your entire life.

“Then I love it here.”  

Jungkook makes sure that your angels can’t and won’t look for you anymore. He swears that he’ll protect you in every way possible, promising to shield you from anything that will hurt you. Jungkook looks at your beautiful red eyes, feeling your arms wrap around his neck as you pull him close. 

The last thing anyone should do is trust a devil — and that goes for your foolish angels. 

[navalcriminalimagines]

Pairings: Rafael Barba x Reader, Sonny Carisi x Reader

Warnings: none?

Words: 4,511

Prompt: Rafael spent years keeping his feelings for you hiding.

Missed shot

When Rafael Barba started to work with Manhattan’s SVU, you’d been a detective there for almost two years. You joined the squad shortly before Stabler left. You saw Nick Amaro and Amanda Rollins joining in too. At first, Cragen partnered you with Amanda, and Olivia with Nick, but considering it wasn’t working between Liv and Nick, changes were made, and Nick became your partner.

You two quickly became close, like a brother-sister relationship. He told you about his issues with Maria, you were the first (and only one) to know when him and Amanda became a thing. So, obviously, you told him your secret.

“This is Tomas,” you told Nick, as you were showing him a picture of an 8-year-old boy. “My son,” you added. “Don’t bother counting, I did give birth to him when I was 17.”

“He’s cute. Looks a lot like you,” Nick smiled at you. “Nobody in the squad know?” he asked.

“Cragen does. But he’s our Captain and it’s in my file. But the rest, nope,”

“Why not?”

You told him more about your debut in the police. At first, you did hide the fact that you were a mom. But you quickly realized that your coworkers and others were judging you. People took you as immature, non-serious, and some guy actually pictured you as an easy girl. You hated every second of your debut. So, when you joined the bomb squad, you decided to make your son a secret. It’s much better this way.

Olivia learned about your son when she took Cragen’s place. A part of her was surprised, but another wasn’t. She saw you with kids, you do have that mother instinct. And of course, she promised that nobody would know about Tom.

Working with the SVU squad wasn’t an evidence for Rafael Barba. Nick gave him hard time for no apparent reasons, Amanda wasn’t a fan of him. Fin didn’t care much. But luckily, Olivia welcomed him nicely and then there was you. You were sweet to him, kind. You asked him if you whether call him “Rafael” or “Barba” – “Your choice,” he answered. You ask him how he’s doing every time you see him. You usually bring him a coffee when you stopped by his office.

You’re nice, gorgeous, young, smart, badass… it didn’t take long for Rafael to get interested in you. More than just as coworker. But this couldn’t be happening, so he started to stay away from you as much as possible. At first, it was easy since Rafael only sees you as a detective. He doesn’t know anything about you outside of the office, only that you have Swedish origins from your father. He doesn’t want to know more. He doesn’t need to.

But despite himself, he overheard conversations between you and Nick every now and then. When the name “Tom” came back multiple times, Rafael assumed you had a boyfriend. Good. This should make things easier.

For two years working together, you and Rafael had a normal work relationship. He kept his crush under-wrap, seeing people every now and then, when the thought of you was too much. Sometimes it was one-night stands, sometimes a bit more. But he never kept seeing the same person for more than two months. That’s when people want to make things more permanent. Rafael doesn’t want that.

Keeping you at arm’s length was perfect for him. He couldn’t let you in. He wasn’t open for a serious relationship, and he felt like you could turn his world upside down if he let you in.

He almost did when Nick got shot. You were very worried for your partner, Rafael almost hugged you when you started to cry in front of him. But Liv called at the same point, so he didn’t. And then Nick left SVU, and New York. His departure hurt you a lot, for a moment, Rafael thought you two had some kind of an intimate relationship. But he remembered a conversation you two had.

“Hey Barba, we’re going out for drinks. Wanna join?” you casually asked.

“What’s the occasion?”

“Okay, first, do you need an occasion to go out for drinks? And second, it’s just that Nick needs to get his mind off the breakup,”

“So, it’s definitely over between him and his wife?”

“Yeah, she’s moving to DC with Zara. He’s not doing great,”

“But he can always count on his other partner,” Rafael said, without thinking.

You chuckled, “What does that mean?”

“You two are—close,” Hopefully, it didn’t sound like jealousy. Which it actually was.

“Amanda is the one he slept with, not me. I’d rather sleep with you,” you left right after.

This was months ago, but Rafael still couldn’t believe you said that. He tried not to overthink about it, but he couldn’t. Was this just a joke? Were you just trying to prove a point? Or did you see him as more than just a coworker? He considered trying to explore this, but before he found the courage to do something about it, Sonny Carisi joined the squad and became your partner.

You missed Nick a lot, but you welcomed Sonny with open arms, unlike the others at first. He will forever be thankful about that. It didn’t take long for Rafael to see that you had a bond with Sonny, just like the bond you had with Nick. Maybe more. Liv told him a few times that being partners when you’re a cop is very special. He understands that, but it doesn’t he likes it when it comes to you.

Few months after Sonny join in, Rafael heard the name Tom again. You must have to Sonny about your boyfriend. Since he didn’t hear that name for months, he assumed that you two had broken up. But apparently not. Meaning that there’s nothing romantic with Carisi, but you still have a boyfriend. So, Rafael tried to forget what you told him and kept trying to convince himself that what he’s feeling for you isn’t love.

More months went by. It was obvious for Rafael that Carisi had a thing for you. He didn’t like it, but there’s nothing he can do. But he kept turning down all of your offers when the squad met up for drinks. He didn’t need that. He didn’t want to know the you outside work.

One day, he showed up to the precinct. No one was nowhere to be find. He spotted a gift wrapped on your desk. Curious, he took a closer look. There was a card. He looked around, still no one. So, he tried to take a look at the card.

“That’s very noisy of you, counselor,” he heard for behind. You. He jumped from the surprise, let go of the card.

“A box on a detective’s desk. Had to be sure it wasn’t a bomb,” he said, trying to keep a straight face. You laughed at his excuse.

“Would love to see your reaction if you saw a bomb,” you said, with a smile on your face. Apparently, you aren’t mad, so that’s good.

“I’d rather not,” he shyly smiled at you. “What would your reaction be?”

“Considering that I’ve been there before, I would keep my calm and do my best to defuse it,” you said before walking to the coffee area. Rafael analyzed your words for a moment before joining you.

“Come again?”

“Spent two years with the bomb squad before joining SVU,” you casually said, handing him the cup of coffee you just poured.

In four years, this was the first personal information you gave him. He almost couldn’t believe it.

“I—I didn’t know,”

“Well, yeah. We never talked about anything else than our cases,”

“True,” he took a sip. “And why would that be? In your opinion,”

“Because you don’t like me,”

You had poured another cup for yourself and walked up straight to your desk after those words. You sat, grabbed the gift to put it aside and started to look at something on your computer. Rafael was stunned for a moment but joined you again. He closed your laptop, and leaned against your desk, right next to you. He had never been this physically close to you before.

“Why in the world would you think that?” He asked.

“We’ve been working together for four years, Barba. Not once, did you show some kind of interest in me. You’re best friends with Liv, you tolerate Amanda, you’re courteous with Fin. Hell, you gave hard time to Sonny for the first year but now you agreed for him to shadow you. But me? I feel like you wish I wasn’t here,”

Rafael stayed silent for a moment, analyzing your words. Indeed, he tried to keep his distance with you, but he never thought it made you feel that way. He felt very bad about himself.

“But hey, no problem, okay? We’ve been able to make it work that way for years, there’s no reasons we can’t keep going,”

“You’re very wrong—about everything, Y/N.”

“Then what is it?” You locked your sweet blue eyes into his. For a moment, he was afraid you may see all the love he has for you in his eyes. What reasonable excuse could he tell you? His mind raced. But thankfully, the rest of the squad came back at that moment.

“Barba, Y/N. Are you interrupting?” Rollins smiled.

“Nope,” Rafael stood up right and followed Liv into her office. You watched him leave. No answer. Again.

The gift was actually from Sonny, but it wasn’t for you. It’s for Tomas, who’s now 13 years old. The father left when you told him you were pregnant (he was a bit older) and never saw him again. You raised Tom by yourself, with the full support of your parents, luckily. Your son showed up his interest in makeup and esthetic about a year ago. You completely support him in his passion, brought him whatever he needed/wanted.

Sonny went shopping with his 16 years old niece Mia during the weekend and she wanted to go to the Sephora. He asked her what he could offer to Tomas.

“Uncle Sonny. Are you trying to seduce the mother by being so nice to the son?” Mia asked with a smirk on her face.

“Okay, first, I wouldn’t need to do that. And second, it’s just that—it’s not easy to be different. I just want him to know that he can count on me,”

“Like you wished you could count on someone when you realized you were bisexual?”

Sonny looked at his niece with wide eyes. He still isn’t out to his family. How could she know? “Last year, I figured that this Sam you talked about wasn’t a she but a he. And--I’m bi, too, Uncle Sonny.”

That’s a lot to process in two minutes, while he is standing in the middle of a makeup store.

“There’s nothing wrong with that…right?” Mia added.

“Oh, of course not, sweetheart!” He immediately answered. “When did you know?”

“I was sure when I fell in love with a girl, a few months ago,” she confessed.

Sonny hugged his niece and kissed her hair. “What’s her name? I’d love to meet her,”

“Joy. And that would be nice. I’m so happy I finally told you,”

“I’ll never judge you. And I’ll always be there for you,”

In the squad, you were the only one Sonny came out to. Which makes the two of you even closer.

After the gift “incident”, you and Rafael didn’t talk again for weeks. To be fair, he was trying to avoid you. He almost confessed his feelings for you and that can’t be happening. After this, Rafael decided to call back a woman he used to see. She’s beautiful, smart, nice and wants the same things he does. Exactly what he needs.

He never wanted to talk about his personal life at work, but one day, you showed up in his office. Rafael was on the phone, his back to the door. He didn’t hear you come in, so he kept making plans with Judith. You listened, and felt your chest tightened.

Before he hung up, Rafael heard the door of his office closing. He turned around; nobody was there but he saw you walking out through the blinds. You had heard and walked away.

When Rafael told you, you were wrong about your assumptions, you thought that maybe he was feeling the same way you did. Turns out, you were wrong.

It was Tom’s 14th birthday. You helped him planned an afternoon party. He told you he invited about 10 friends.

But no one showed up. Your son didn’t feel ashamed about his passion - thanks to you and Sonny, mostly - but apparently, his “friends” didn’t like it.

“Baby, why didn’t you tell me they were bullying you? On Monday I’ll go see your principal,”

“Exactly for this. If you do this, it’s gonna be worse. Maybe I should stop,”

“Stop what? Doing something you like? Not under my watch, T. Those kids are just the reflections of their close-minded parents,”

“Yeah, but at least people show up to their birthday parties,”

It broke your heart to see your son like this. You needed to fix this. You need to see your son happy. All day, every day. You went to the bathroom and called Sonny.

“Sonny, I need you,” you said when he answered. “Short things first, those stupid kids didn’t show up to T’s party. There’s no one here. Can you come? With Mia? And Joy? I’m gonna call Liv, see if she can come with Noah,”

“I’m with Mike right now so he’ll be with me. Call Fin too, we’ll stop by Amanda’s to pick her and Jesse,”

“Okay, that’s great, thanks Sonny,”

“Of course. Tom will remember his 14th birthday I promise. Why don’t you call Barba too?”

“Why in the world would I do that?”

“It would be rude not to. Don’t you think?”

“I guess. I’ll see. Can you be there in about an hour?”

You call Liv and she agreed, same for Fin. But Sonny was right, you had to call Rafael.

“Barba,” he answered.

“Hey, it’s Y/N. Sorry to bother you on Saturday afternoon. Um—if you aren’t busy, what do you think about stopping by my son’s birthday? It’s kinda unfair, but stupid kids didn’t show up. I call everyone, they’re all coming. But hey, don’t feel obligated. You don’t have to if you don’t—“

“Okay,” he answered before you could finish your monologue.

“Okay?” You repeated.

“Yeah. When should I be there? And how old is he?”

“I said an hour to everyone. And if you’re asking his age to buy him a gift, don’t bother. Right now, all he needs is people to be there to celebrate,”

“Y/N, don’t make me argue please. How old is your son?”

“14.”

“Okay, thanks. See you in an hour then. Text me the address, please,”

“See you, Rafael,”

Rafael tried to stay calm and natural in front of Judith, but there were some many things in his head right now. Since he went to the bedroom to answer your call, he lied to the woman he was with, pretending a work emergency to leave.

You have a kid. A teenage kid, actually. A quick count made him realized you gave birth when you were 17. Many things made sense now. He needs confirmation but it seems clear that, this Tom he heard about, is actually your son, and not your boyfriend like he assumed.

How could he not know about this? You’ve been working together for almost five years now. He really kept his distance with you. But somehow, he still fell hard for you.

“Hey Liv, I got a call from Y/N. I’d like to buy a little something for her son, do you have any idea?”

“Well, do you know anything about makeup?”

“I beg your pardon?”

Liv laughed. “Where are you? I can pick you up and we stop by a store to buy him something,”

“Okay, I trust you on that.”

An hour later, everybody was there. You welcomed them as they arrived. “If he doesn’t like it, that’s on Liv,” Rafael joked as he handed you the gift he had for your son.

“Nope. That’s on that sells woman that was clearly hitting on you,” Liv interjected.

“She wasn’t— okay, she was. But not my type,”

“Yeah, and Judith probably wouldn’t like it,”

“I don’t know about that. And she doesn’t need to know anyway,” he smiled.

Tom’s mood improved when he saw Mia and Joy. You and Sonny introduced them months ago and Tomas is crazy about them.

“What happened to your face?” Mia asked and Tom frowned. “No makeup, seriously T?” She added, before taking him by the hand.

“Wait—“ you stopped them before they reached the bedroom. “Tomas, meet Mike and Rafael, first. They are the only ones you haven’t met yet,”

It made sense that Tom hadn’t met Mike yet, since he joined SVU a couple of months ago. But yeah, it stings to Rafael. Five years. And he didn’t know.

“You look like a cop,” he said Mike, “but you don’t,” he then said to Rafael.

“Cause I’m not. I’m an ADA, Assistant Dis—“

“I know what it is,” he cut him. “Thank you for coming,”

“Can we do his makeup now?” Mia called out and the three of them — adding Jesse who wanted to go too — disappeared in the bedroom for a moment.

“Thanks, guys, for showing up this quick. It’s a mess,” you sadly said. “T told me that he’s being bullied at school because he loves makeup, lets his hair grow. Apparently, they are calling him a sissy,” your jaw clenched. Rafael saw the mama bear in you. “He doesn’t want me to interfere. But maybe I should anyway,”

“You’re here for him. We all are, that’s what he needs,” Sonny said, wrapping his arm around your shoulders to bring you comfort. Rafael tried to avoid the jealousy in his belly.

Opening gifts arrived fast. Everyone brought him something, mostly makeup stuff. Sonny actually got him an appointment in a famous hair salon in Manhattan. Now that his hair is long enough, Tom mentioned wanting to get a real haircut. Mike listened to Sonny’s advices for his gift.

“This is from Nick,” Liv said as she gave Tom a gift. “He wants you to call later,”

“Mom!! That’s two tickets for California!” Tomas exclaimed before reading the note. “And he’s offering me surfing lessons! When are we going? Before—“

“Soon, my love.” You said before he could finish his sentence.

Then came Rafael’s gift. “You can return it if you don’t like,” he said. But Tom’s face lit up when he saw what it was.

“Mom!!!” He showed you the gift, with a huge grin on his face.

“Wow! You finally got it,” you returned his smile and moved a little to stand by Rafael’s side.

“Thank you so much, Rafael!” Tom stood up and hugged the ADA. Some affection Rafael didn’t expect.

“He’s been bugging me for this palette for weeks. I told him to wait because it’s damn expensive,” you whispered to Rafael.

“It’s okay. I’m glad he likes it,” he just answered.

Tomas was thrilled with all of his gifts. It feels good that with those people, he doesn’t have to hide himself, who he is and what he loves. Later, you noticed that Rafael setback from the others. You stood next to him.

“You’re not mad about the gift, are you?” He asked, before you could say anything.

“A little, to be honest,”

“I can pay for that,”

“I know. I see your clothes every day. But that’s not the point,”

“Then what is the point?”

“For the first five years of his life, I couldn’t buy him things. All the toys he had were gifts from my parents— when I made better money, I spoiled him. For years. And now, he’s a very smart teenage boy but he doesn’t necessarily have the value of money. Which I’m trying to teach him. And you showed up with this hella expensive palette, Nick got him plane tickets and surfing lessons. Even the appointment Sonny got him is expensive. That’s not helping,”

“Great,” he smiled, and you shot him a glare, “you’re not actually mad at me, but more at yourself,”

“Don’t do this. You’re not a parent, Rafael,”

“Indeed,” he took a deep breath, “And how come did I do not know you were one?”

“This will just bring us back to our convo from February, don’t you think? And we both know how it ended,”

“We were interrupted,”

“And you’ve been avoiding me ever since,”

So, you noticed that. You always noticed things. He hates that about you. He intensely looked at you, not knowing what to say exactly.

“But don’t worry, Barba, you won’t have to use force for that anymore,” you gently patted his shoulder and joined the others. “My love, do you mind if I steal your thunder for a moment?” You asked your son.

“Nope. Are you going to tell them?”

You looked at Liv for approval and signed Rafael to come closer, which he did. Everybody waited for you to talk. “I—I’m leaving SVU,” you said. There were gasps, widen eyes and Sonny choked on his beer. “Don’t die yet, Sonny. I haven’t finished,” you paused. “It’s no secret that my father was born in Sweden and move here after he fell in love with my mum,”

That, Rafael did know. You talked about your Swedish origins. “After my mum died, my father moved back there. And he’s been bugging us to come with him and considering I’ve always promised this one,” you said, playing with Austin’s hair, “that we would try to live there for a while, I’m actually taking a sabbatical. And next month, we’re flying to Sweden. But we’ll stop by California first, apparently,”

Only Liv knew. So, it came as a shock to everyone else.

The mood changed after that. They were all happy but also sad to see you and Tom leave. Mostly Sonny. It was very rare to witness a silent Sonny Carisi, but this was it. One by one, people started to leave the party. Mia and Joy took your son to the bowling alley. Rafael wanted to be the last so he could have a talk with you, but apparently, Sonny had the same thing in mind.

Rafael was helping you cleaning up the apartment when you noticed Sonny, on your small balcony. “How long has he been there?” You asked Rafael, who just raised his shoulders, clearly annoyed. You joined Sonny, not knowing that Rafael could hear everything you two were talking about.

“You okay there, Sonshine?” Sonny chuckled.

“A bit stunned, I guess.” He said, not looking at you.

“Yeah, I’m sorry. I—I was afraid to tell you,”

“Why?”

“Because of what happened a few months ago. Because I’m scared to leave you. Because—I was afraid to change my mind after I told you,”

He finally looked at you. “I’ll never hold you back, Y/N. You know that? You talk so much about Sweden, so does Tom. I’m not completely surprised,”

“Under different circumstances—“ you said, letting the silence says the rest. Sonny turned to his side, so he was facing you.

“I was okay with being your second choice, Y/N, as long as you chose me. But you’re also leaving to be away from him, aren’t you?”

You nodded. “I don’t want to promise you anything, Sonny. But maybe—after that year away—“

He knew what you meant. Sonny put his hand on your cheek, softly caressing your skin with his thumb. Before he could lean in to kiss you, you both heard the balcony window opening. Rafael was standing there. “Who’s your first choice, Y/N?” He just asked. Sonny loudly sighed and turned his back to the lawyer.

“Not important, Rafael.”

“Por favor— answer me.”

“You, idiot,” Sonny muttered, still looking over Manhattan.

“Can—can you come inside for a moment, please?” Rafael asked.

“Don’t worry, I’m leaving,” Sonny said, and turned around to kiss your forehead, “Don’t make anything stupid. Call me,” he kissed your forehead again and walked past Rafael to leave.

“Great timing, Barba,” you sighed.

“I—I don’t understand,” he struggled to say.

“You may be a smart-ass lawyer but when it comes to relationships, you’re very dumb,”

“How long have you—?”

“Been in love with you? About three years. Somehow, the more you pushed me away, the more it made me fall,”

“I pushed you away only because I was scared. Scared of the things I feel for you,”

“You can’t—you can’t confess your love to me as I’m leaving the States, Rafael. That’s not fair,”

“If I don’t do it now, when am I supposed to do it? Over the phone while you’re in Sweden? Or when you come back and choose Carisi?” He paused. “Did you guys sleep together or something?”

“Definitely none of your business,” you said. “And you had five years. Five fucking years, during which all you did was making me feel like a burden for you,”

“I—I never meant to do that. I’m sorry,”

“It’s too late, Rafael. I’m leaving anyway,”

“I’ll wait for you if you ask me to,”

“I’m not. Just like I won’t ask that to Sonny,”

“Then—what? What do we do?”

“Nothing. I’m leaving with my boy in a few weeks, maybe I’ll come back next year, or maybe I won’t. And everybody goes on with their life,”

“Are you saying that I missed my shot with you?”

“Probably,”

This will be hard to swallow. Rafael probably never will, to be honest. But one thing is sure, he couldn’t miss his last chance to kiss you. He closed the gap between your bodies, and slowly put his hands on each side of your face. Since you weren’t pushing him away, he took it as a permission and leaned in to kiss you. He softly put his lips on yours. Right here, right now, on your balcony, nothing else mattered but you and him.

Things escalated quickly. The kiss got more intense, and you used force to make him step back into your apartment. Still kissing each other, Rafael slid his hands on your butt and your legs, gently squeezing to signal you to jump in his arms, which you did. He pulled away briefly, just to ask you which one was your bedroom.

He laid you down on the bed, clothes quickly fly across the room. This probably wouldn’t change a thing, but Rafael made love to you as if his life depends on it.

Indeed, it didn’t change a thing. Two weeks later, you and Tomas flew to California, spent two weeks there with Nick, before flying to Sweden.

Part two, anyone?

[soramei]

Intentional - Part 5

Pairing: Bang Chan x Reader (she/her)

Summary: Landing your first real job at JYPE was something short of a miracle. You were prepared to face the new struggles of this elusive career whilst moving to a new country, however, nothing could have prepared you for him. Will stolen glances, secret touches, and hushed nights spent in the recording room ever be enough for the both of you?

Genre: idol!bang chan au, forbidden relationship, coworkers to eventual lovers, slow burn

Warnings: cursing, eventual smut

Word Count: 4.0k

Masterlist

A/N: yeah so about that upload... i was really busy this whole week but i hope to start uploading mondays again! thanks for understanding!!

Taglist (reply to be tagged!): @planetdemon​ @hvunvely​ @fluffybitch0325​ @fashi0nablee @juststop88 @straykisz @theultimaterad @margaritas-en-la-montania @meowtella

There was a pause in the phone call.

You started biting your nails, instantly regretting what you had just done. Basking in your stupidity, you could only wait for his response, for it was too late to retract what you had just said. Your day must have been worse than you thought. It must have been so bad that you had the nerve to ask Bang Chan — an idol, a person with a strict schedule, somebody who you had an argument with — to come over to your pathetic little apartment.

You kept nibbling on your fingers.

“I’ll get my jacket.”

You froze, eyes wide.

“Huh?” You were bewildered. You weren’t even expecting an answer, much less this.

“It’s cold this late at night,” he explained, “I’ll be there soon.”

You didn’t know what to say. You heard rustling on the other side of the call.

“Wait, I’ll tell you my address,” you blurted out.

“You did,” he said.

You frowned, trying to remember if you did or not. That’s right. You blushed at the memory of your first day of work.

“Oh yeah, umm, I’ll hang up now.” You awkwardly said, hanging up before Bang Chan could fit another word in.

You were a statue in your own apartment, clinging on to the last words exchanged on your phone. In actuality, you didn’t know why you asked him to come over. It was just blurted out in the moment. Or maybe it was a result of your extremely frustrating day. Either way, you felt extremely embarrassed that you did so, especially so late at night.

You started boiling some water, still trying to rationalize what you had just done. This was normal for friends, right? Na-eun and Yoojin came over just yesterday and you were friends with both of them. You knew for a fact that you two were friends, but you still couldn’t find an explanation for the strange feeling in your chest whenever you were around him.

Turning your phone on, you checked your face in the selfie camera. It was a miracle that your makeup didn’t smudge off. You thanked your new ‘CLIO’ foundation cushion, it looked like all that time you spent doing your makeup didn’t go to waste. You stared at your reflection for a couple more seconds before turning your phone off. Why did it matter what you looked like anyways? You wiped off any remaining lipstick with the back of your hand.

The kettle started rumbling, letting you know that the water was ready. You took out your mug to prepare some tea. It was a bad idea to have tea this late at night, but there was something about your mother’s tea that could knock a grown man out.

Sipping your tea, you turned on Youtube to an episode of a Korean web-drama that was getting really popular. It was another one with some rich CEO and a clumsy average girl, but you still watched, fully enamoured. On the recommendations list, there was a video with Felix — the other person you saw at the cafeteria on your first day — on the thumbnail. I can never escape from work, you thought to yourself, rolling your eyes.

You clicked on it anyways, just to pass the time. Watching through the video, you were shocked by the production value. Well, that, and Bang Chan. Whether it was hair and makeup or just his acting, he was so different from the person you knew in real life. You were in awe by his natural charisma gleaming at you through the screen as it was a rare quality that few people you knew possessed. Embarrassingly, you found your eyes drawn to only him in every group shot. He looked good in an apron.

You got distracted by more random videos before clicking back on your drama. The next episode was just about to start when the buzzer to your apartment rang.

It was Bang Chan.

Hurriedly, you shuffled towards your door. With your hand on the handle, you took a deep breath before opening the door.

“Hey,” you smiled.

“Hey,” he smiled back. He was leaning over you, his forearm on the doorframe. His coat was bulky, almost engulfing his whole upper body. He was wearing the same beanie you saw on multiple occasions, and in his hand was a white plastic bag.

You stepped aside, silently gesturing for him to come inside. He took your hint and sauntered in the room, head turning left and right to observe his surroundings.

“It’s not much,” you blushed, realizing how small your apartment really was. You could basically see all your belongings from the center of the room.

“No, it’s cute.” Bang Chan looked at you, taking his hat off. His dimple peaked out. “I brought some leftovers from that barbecue place. The kids and I went there after our shoot today.”

So that was what the bag was. With only food on your mind, you rushed to help hang Bang Chan’s coat before setting the table up.

The food was really good. They were leftovers, but it was so good. Stuffing a bite of pork belly in your mouth, you sighed. Where was this food earlier today?

“It’s good, right?” Bang Chan asked whilst chewing on a piece of meat. “I’ll take you next time.”

It was like he read your mind. You nodded eagerly in response, to which Bang Chan replied with a smirk.

“So, uh,” he scratched the back of his neck, “how was your date today?”

You rolled your eyes, not wanting to remember that embarrassment of a night. It was such a pity too, because that man was probably the most gorgeous man you’ve ever witnessed. You swore he had just stepped out of a webtoon when you first met him.

“It was alright,” you shrugged. It was difficult to reflect on the date without putting a damper on your mood, but maybe vocalizing it would have helped ease your discomfort. “He compared me to a model, you know.”

Bang Chan chuckled, making you look up in confusion.

“Was it because you looked exactly like the model?”

“No,” you replied.

His face immediately fell. “You’re kidding, right? Y/n, tell me you don’t believe anything that loser said. He’s got to be something below garbage if he was comparing two women.”

“Thanks, Chan.” You tried to force a grin on your face. “I appreciate it.”

There was a pause.

“I know my opinion means nothing, but Y/n, I think you’re beautiful.”

You stared into Bang Chan’s eyes, frozen like a statue. Your heart was beating so loud that you could hear it more than you could feel it. He stared back at you from across the table; mouth parted, breaths uneven.

You’ve received many compliments before, to which you would always reply with a smile and a quick ‘thank you’. However, it felt as if your brain malfunctioned in this moment and your heart was the only thing keeping you alive. You could still feel your body, but you couldn’t think.

“Thank you, Chan.” You awkwardly coughed, blushing profusely. Immediately focusing your eyes at the table, you couldn’t bear to keep looking at him.

The two of you ate in silence, with only the tapping of chopsticks adding to the ambience of the room. You wanted to make conversation with him, but you did not want to be the first one to break the silence. It frustrated you that you were so shy right now as you’ve never been like this back home.

To heck with it, you thought. There was no need to be shy around him.

“So,” you still couldn’t look him in the face, “any shows you’ve been watching lately?”

Small talk was good. You could do small talk.

“Actually, I’ve been wanting to watch this Transformers movie for quite a while.”

“Transformers?” You’ve never heard of that one. It must’ve been an American movie.

“Seriously?” his eyes widened. “You’ve never seen Transformers before? Oh, we’ve gotta watch it now.”

“You wanna?” you smiled. “I haven’t used my TV since moving in.”

“Mhm, let’s do it.” He stuffed the rest of the leftovers in his mouth before standing up and clearing the table.

You watched him clear the table in a trance. You should have offered to help since it was your own home, but watching the veins on his hands appear and disappear was way more interesting. Watching him, you suddenly remembered the hoodie.

“Oh, that’s right!” You exclaimed, shuffling over to the bag with the hoodie in it. Taking Bang Chan’s black hoodie out, you held it up to him with both hands.

He looked down at you and chuckled.

“Keep it,” he took it from your hands and slipped the hoodie over your head. “At least until you buy a new jacket.”

“I will.” You rolled the sleeves of his hoodie higher to show your hands. You turned the light off, leaving only the floor lamp to illuminate your apartment. Grabbing the remote from your coffee table, you summoned Bang Chan over to the couch.

You turned on the TV, fooling around with the remote control for a few seconds before giving up.

“I give up.” You sighed. Pouting, you handed the remote over to Bang Chan. He took it from you and started reading the buttons.

“Netflix, right?” Bang Chan asked, to which you nodded. “There we go.”

He scrolled through the titles, looking for the coveted movie. Once he found the movie, he quickly selected it and turned the subtitles on. That was nice of him, you thought. Although you also studied english in university, it was nowhere near the level of watching a full english movie.

The title sequence started and you tried to immerse yourself in the movie. You watched in awe, surprised at the fast pace of the action already.

Fully engrossed, you started to sink your back into the couch. Half-way throughout the title scene, you felt Bang Chan stretch his arm behind you to rest on the back pillow. Suddenly, you started feeling too aware of your surroundings. You sat up straighter.

Throughout the whole movie, you caught wafts of Bang Chan’s cologne everytime he moved. He smelled like safety and familiarity.

You turned your head up a little to get a glimpse of his profile, mapping out every edge and curve of his face. The light illuminated the tip of his nose, along with his dewy cheekbones and chin. The plum of his lips were let slightly open, allowing his teeth to peek out slightly. You unconsciously let out a sigh.

“Something wrong?” He turned his body to face you.

You shook your head and focused on the movie.

The rest of the movie was pretty good, although it lost you at parts. You watched the end credits in silence, not knowing what to say.

“So,” Bang Chan cleared his throat beside you, “I should get going now. Since it’s late.”

You turned your head to face him, not realizing how close the two of you had physically gotten throughout the movie. Looking up at him, your face was inches away from his. His face was almost enveloped by the darkness of your apartment. You heard his breathing get heavier.

“Yeah,” you breathed out, “you should.”

He didn’t get up though.

You heard his staggered breath as you kept looking in his eyes. The end credits had long been over by now. Your own breath was just as shaky and you heard your heart beat out of your chest.

He started leaning in. Slowly.

Your eyes widened. You gulped, your nerves snapped you back to reality all of a sudden. Wasn’t he supposed to be your friend? This wasn’t what friends did… Right?

Clearing your throat, you leaned back shyly.

“You should go. I don’t want the others to notice you’re gone.”

Silence.

“Yeah.” Bang Chan’s lips flattened in a line. Without another word, he stood up and walked towards your door.

You followed him in silence, hoping to at least send him off. Wrapping your arms around your torso, you watched as he put his boots on in the dark. He tied his laces, and with a nod, he opened the door and stepped out.

You were left with a sour taste in your mouth and a cloudiness in your head. Still standing in front of your door, you tried to process what had just happened. However, you couldn’t. All you could think about was the soft curls of his hair, the delicate threads of his eyelashes, and his lips. The dusty rose of his lips. The parting of his lips. Inviting you in.

You were frozen, looking at nothing particularly. The only thing on your mind was Bang Chan.

The door opened.

“Hey, sorry, I forgot my jack-”

His sentence never got a chance to complete itself as you rushed to him, wrapping your arms around his neck. As your lips touched his, you felt a fire ignite in you like nothing you’ve felt before. Your fingers clawed at the nape of his neck, wanting more. Wanting to be closer.

Almost immediately, Bang Chan responded. He was taken by shock at first, but his hands didn’t waste any time to grip your waist. You felt the muscles of his shoulders tighten as he pulled you closer.

He moved you back into your apartment by the waist, lips never leaving your own. You blindly shuffled backwards, only focused on trying to get closer to him. If that was even possible.

You ignored the clunking of his boots against your clean floor, allowing him to guide you to the couch. A whimper left his lips as you used your hand to comb through his hair, pulling it. His soft brown curls were silk against your fingertips.

The back of your legs hit the couch and he turned you around so he could sit on the couch. Your lips finally left his. You gasped for air, trying to steady your deep breaths.

Bang Chan’s breathing was synchronized with yours, his equally as unsteady. He reached his hands out again, grabbing your waist and pulling you on top of him. You were a ragdoll, responding to whatever he wanted to do to you.

With each knee on either side of him, you gripped his jaw and kissed him again. The fire inside of you instantly reignited. It was addicting.

The two of you didn’t dare to separate from each other, only parting to gasp for air every now and then. Even in the dark, you could imagine the plum of his lips and the threads of his eyelashes. This drove the fire in you more.

“What if the boys realize you’re gone?” you breathed out the next time you parted from his lips. They were most likely sleeping, but the thought still worried you.

“Fuck them.” Bang Chan exhaled. Grabbing the back of your neck, he reconnected his lips with yours. You gladly complied.

His sloppy kisses slowly moved from your lips to your jaw, then to your neck, eliciting a soft whimper from your throat. This seemed to only edge him on as kept leaving sloppy kisses against your neck, all the while running his hands up and down your waist.

His cologne surrounded you, keeping you safe. Soon later, the adrenaline left the two of you, leaving only the sound of heavy breathing to fill the room. You brushed your thumb under his eye to which he deeply inhaled.

“Chan?” you said. He was leaving kisses all over your collarbone.

“Hmm?” He didn’t seem to pay much mind to what you were saying.

“It’s half past three. I really think you should get going.” You didn’t want him to leave, but you were almost sure he had another packed schedule for tomorrow.

“Mhmm.” Your words went in one ear and out the other as he made his way up your neck again. You couldn’t help but close your eyes and let out a small moan.

“C’mon, get up. How did you even get here, by the way?” It took everything in you to break away from his touch, but you were starting to get sleepy.

“Taxi.” He said, helping you get up from his lap. He stood up after you, brushing his hand against your waist one last time before making his way over to his jacket.

“You’re allowed to ride a taxi?” You tilted your head, sceptical.

He slipped his jacket on.

“No.” He peppered little kisses on your cheeks. “You don’t know how long I’ve wanted to do that now.”

You giggled, pushing him by his shoulders out the door. He played along, pretending to stumble with every step he took back.

“Text me when you get home,” you said, repeating what he said to you on your first day of work.

He nodded in response and winked before turning around to head home. As soon as the door shut, you slapped both hands against your face. Your little act of impulse had spun your head in spirals. You didn’t know whether to feel relieved at the fact that Bang Chan reciprocated your impulsive actions, or to worry that you had not only just kissed your coworker — but also a freaking idol. No one — not Manager Chen, your friends, or even anyone in the general public — could know about this. If they did, both your careers would be screwed.

You doted on this thought as you got ready for bed, only the worst possible outcome came to mind. If either your manager or his manager knew about what happened tonight, you could get fired. Or even blacklisted. You sat in bed, nervously biting your nails.

Your phone buzzed.

Bang Chan: Hey, I got home. Nobody’s awake… ^^

Bang Chan: Don’t think too much, alright? It’s late, go to sleep…

You felt relief reading his text. For some reason, he knew you were overthinking your actions. You decided to listen to his words and go to sleep.

The next day, Sunday, was very uneventful compared to the day before. You texted Bang Chan back when you woke up, but because of his busy schedule, he hadn’t had the time to reply yet.

Yoojin called in when you were eating lunch, asking about your date. You told her the truth, explaining how there would definitely not be a second date with that man. She sounded disappointed and vehemently tried to set you up with another man in her pool. You politely declined, thinking about your restless night with Bang Chan.

You finished some work ahead of time to free up the next week. Since you were invited to work with Manager Chen at the content shooting, you assumed that you could lessen your work stress ahead of time.

The shooting days were allocated for Friday and Saturday, with there being an overnight stay at the mountains. Whilst you didn’t know the arrangements for Stray Kids, you were informed that the production crew booked a small lodge for the team. You were excited to not only see a behind the scenes of a real shoot, but to also possibly form a closer relationship with Manager Chen.

You were thankful that you did some work ahead of time as Monday’s workload was so much lighter than usual. People were still coming to you with their ideas for the project, but with your other work done, you had the time to go through everybody’s ideas.

You didn’t hear from Bang Chan the whole day, which was nothing out of the blue. You remembered him showing his schedule to you once. The amount of things he had to do everyday had your eyes bulging out from their sockets. All of a sudden, you were thankful for your nine-to-five job.

The next couple of days ran the same way as your Monday, with you easily breezing through your workload. Since you had more time during your breaks at work, you took to exploring the part of the building that you could. You admired all the art, the trophies, the awards and memorabilia. Of course, you also spent more time with your new friend Na-eun.

On Thursday, the day before the shoot, you were helping the producers by translating some notes for the script. All was going smoothly, when you got a text.

It was from Bang Chan.

You weren’t going to lie; you were curious as to what he sent you. He was basically silent the whole week so far, and if you were being honest, you missed hearing his voice. And seeing his face. And feeling his hands brush against your waist.

Bang Chan: Come to my recording room… I’ve got something to show you.

Your eyes lit up right away, curious as to what he wanted to show you. Quickly checking the time, you decided to take your lunch break then and there. After all, you didn’t have much work left for the day anyways.

Locking up your computer, you zoomed inconspicuously past all the other cubicles and made your way to the elevators. You weaved through the hallways of his floor, praying that your memory didn’t escape you. It seemed like your memory was on your side today as you found yourself in front of a familiar set of doors. You didn’t bother to knock before going in.

Inside was Bang Chan: feet up on the desk, drinking from his iced coffee, concentrating on his producing software. You smiled. He looked so comfortable, even in an ‘office’.

He had his headset in, and didn’t seem to notice that you had entered. You went up behind him and tapped his shoulder. He turned around, and immediately threw his feet off the desk and stood up upon seeing that it was you. You smirked.

“I should really put a ‘please knock’ sign on the door.” He cursed under his breath. He reached behind you to close the door.

You giggled.

“So, what do you have to show me?” you wondered aloud.

“A new song. Since the filming is tomorrow, the producers put me on a time crunch to finish the song by today.”

So that was why he was so busy, you thought. You didn’t realize how the sudden filming would have impacted his schedule for the month. Especially since it would take up two whole days.

He let you sit in his chair, and hovered over you to press play on the song. His chair smelled like his cologne.

As he was playing the song, your eyes drifted up to see his face. The face — even after only four days — you missed. The dark circles under his eyes were prominent. That, along with his disheveled hair, told you that he truly was dedicated to his work. You imagined him sitting where you were, two in the morning, sipping on his iced americano.

“You like it?” His eyes drifted towards you, resembling a puppy bringing a ball back to its owner.

“It’s amazing. I don’t know how you managed this in just a few days,” you said. And you were sincere too. You couldn’t imagine yourself doing any of this.

“Eh, you know, late nights.” he shrugged. “Wanna see another?”

You nodded, and the two of you began listening to another one of his songs. You listened in silent wonderment.

However, the silence didn’t last long as the two of you soon found yourselves on the couch: hands all over each other, lips the same. You were lying underneath him, his arms resting on either side of you to hold his weight up. Your lips never left his as you ran your hands up and down his defined biceps.

The two of you couldn’t stay away from each other. The sound of the songs that he had put on shuffle filled the room, along with a fleeting sigh of moan every now and then. Bang Chan’s hand had started wandering up your blouse when, all of a sudden, the door opened.

“Hey, I have the lyrics h-” He stopped mid-sentence, eyes wide.

Crap.

[auroracalisto]

all the lost things

summary: the reader has always been close with Ms. Mead.  growing up, she went to her neighbor for comfort, hiding from her abusive parents.  but one day, she just disappears.  when she comes back, michael is there, on a path to purify the world.

pairing: michael x reader

word count: 3.9k words

warnings: talks of the antichrist, religious undertones, abusive parents, physical abuse, reader ends up in hospital, reader is stabbed but nothing is said other than she was stabbed, cussing, blood, death, major character death (mead), follows the plotline in the show but not exactly

a/n: no notes, head empty.  also word count could be 4k but it was like 90 words off and yeah

Ms. Mead was always there for [Your name].  No matter what had happened, no matter how her parents had treated her, Ms. Mead was there.  Her parents would hurt her, tease her, ridicule her for her relationship with the renowned Satanist.  They hated the fact that their little “angel” was friends with such a nasty type of woman—and even though they were hypocritical to the highest extent, they stood by that.  She helped to patch her up on particularly bad days.  Ms. Mead had offered time and time again for [Your name] to take a bed in her home, but [Your name] never accepted the offer.  She already helped so much—she never wanted to burden her even more. Not to mention the fact that Ms. Mead hardly knew of everything that occurred.  [Your name] quite often kept most of what happened to herself.  

Ms. Mead was more of a parent to her more than her shitty birth parents.  And when [Your name] went missing, she was understandably concerned.  However, Michael had shown up.  There wasn’t much she could do to find you, especially since you were never listed as missing with the local law enforcement, and the two of them (Ms. Mead and Michael) had yet to figure out just how far Michael’s powers would go, and how soon it would take for him to grow into them.

Ms. Mead waited anxiously for you to return, from wherever you had run off to. It was nearly two weeks after Michael had gotten there.  Two weeks of Ms. Mead leading Michael around and showing him how to live—showing him what life was all about with the loving care of a Satanist mother.  

On a sunny Tuesday afternoon, Michael sat at the dining room table, eating a ham and cheese sandwich.  Ms. Mead was washing dishes, looking over at the boy as a knock sounded at the door.  

“Do you mind getting that?  I’ll be right there, I just have a few more to do.”

Michael gave a small nod, and he sat his sandwich down before he stood and walked over to the front door.  He opened it without wasting a second, seeing a battered woman standing there.  He furrowed his eyebrows at the woman, looking at her arm slung in a cast and her bruised eye and split lip.  She uncomfortably shifted on her leg—while she didn’t have anything on it, it was obvious that she had hurt it.  If she were to bend down, surely her abdomen would kill her.

“Is… is Miriam here?” she asked.

“Who are you?”

The black-haired woman showed up behind Michael.  Her eyes went wide. “[Your name]?”  She quickly moved to hug her.  [Your name] flinched but she hugged back, carefully using her other arm to pat her back.

Michael could see the healing bruises that littered her arms.  “Where the hell have you been, girl?” she asked, looking at her in disbelief.  “What happened to you?”

She took her free hand and turned to look at Michael.  “Shut and lock the door behind us.  Can you get her a change of clothes?  Just sweatpants and a shirt. Hurry.”

Michael blinked slowly but did as he was told.  

Ms. Mead lead [Your name] into the dining room, sitting her down.  She brushed some of the hair out of her face back as she sat across from her.  

“I looked for you, but I couldn’t find anything.  Where were you?  Did you lose your phone?  What happened to the one I gave you for emergencies?”

[Your name]’s beautiful eyes couldn’t meet hers.  She shifted in her seat, taking in a sharp breath when her stomach slightly rubbed against the table she was seated at.  The last time Miriam had interrogated her like this was when she had accidentally broken her sofa and not said anything—and that was nearly seven years ago.

“Uh,” she closed her eyes.  

“I got them,” Michael interrupted.  Of course, he didn’t know he had.  He brought the clothes over and sat them beside Ms. Mead before he sat back down at his sandwich.  He attempted to ignore them but found himself listening to their conversation anyway.

“He found it.”

Miriam’s eyes widened.  “What?”

[Your name] just shrugged, wincing as she did that.  “Yeah.  He found my emergency phone.  And then, he found my go back.  I… I had it packed.  I was ready to leave, Miriam,” she said, leaning back against her seat.  “I was ready to leave and come here,” [Your name] weakly smiled.  “Guess that didn’t happen.”

“Wait, wait, what does all this have—” Miriam stopped herself.  “What did your father do to you?” she softly asked, her warm hand going over the top of [Your name]’s.  

“He beat me until I was unconscious, and then I guess he and my mom dropped me off at the hospital.  I didn’t have anything on me.  My ID is gone, I don’t have my phone.  Everything was stripped off of me save for my clothes. They said I had gone into a coma, but like… they also had to do an emergency surgery because I had been stabbed.”

“He stabbed you?” Miriam felt her face burn with rage.  She couldn’t believe this.  She knew [Your name]’s parents were shit, but she never believed they would do anything like that.

She gave a small nod.  “They’re gonna have to bill me somehow.  I… I might have given them a fake name when I came to.  Let’s see if they can.  That’s also… probably why you couldn’t find me,” she weakly smiled.  

“What did you use?”

“Lucy Moore.”

Miriam rolled her eyes.  “Of course, you did.  I wondered why that sounded so familiar.  I saw it in the newspaper but didn’t think much about it.  Damn. You’ve used that since you were a child,” she huffed softly.  “You’ve been there for nearly two weeks, [Your name].  Are you okay?”

[Your name] shrugged.  “I’m as good as I can be, Miriam.  There’s not much to be said.”

Michael hadn’t touched his food.  He stared at the [color] haired woman for the longest time before he spoke up.

“Why are you here?” he asked.  “You’re not home?”

Miriam looked over at the boy with a frown.  “Michael.”

“No, he’s got a point,” [Your name] sighed.  “I can’t go back.  Not because of this.  But… Miriam, they’re gone.  They’ve completely moved out.  Left and everything.  The house is on the market.  Saw the sign when I was walking by.”

“You walked all the way here?” Michael asked, his eyebrows furrowed.  “From the hospital?”

“Took me about an hour, but yeah,” [Your name] said.  

The resilience she had made Michael’s heart skip a beat.  But perhaps that was also from the immense anger building up in the pit of his stomach for two people that he had never met.  Michael clenched his fists under the table, looking towards his half-eaten sandwich with a type of malice that would burn a human.

His sandwich lit on fire—the bread and meat and cheese immediately being consumed by reds, oranges, and yellows.  

[Your name]’s eyes widened, and she quickly turned to face him, despite the burning pain she felt from doing so.  

Miriam watched with wide eyes, a smile growing on her lips.  When the fire had completely gone out, as it was only contained to his food, she grinned at him. “This is Michael, my dear,” Miriam said.  “He’s been staying with me since you disappeared.”

“How—how did he—”

“—he’s the Antichrist, dear.”

Well, there was no hiding that.  Michael quickly looked up at Miriam, surprised that she told [Your name] so quickly.  

[Your name] furrowed her eyebrows in confusion, before she gave a small nod. “Right, so, you—you made that fire all on your own?” she asked.

When Michael nodded, [Your name] turned to face Ms. Mead.  

“Can I take a shower?” she asked.

Michael blinked a couple of times.  The woman wasn’t afraid of him—that struck him as odd.  She had just been dropped with the news that would bring the end of times—and yet, she just asked his adoptive mom if she could take a shower.

Who was she?

Miriam nodded.  “We’ve got to cover up your cast.  Can’t risk it getting wet,” she said, going to find some plastic wrap in the kitchen.

Michael stared the injured woman down for a moment.  “You’re not afraid?”

She looked over at him with a frown.  “Why would I be?  After everything I’ve been through,” she said, sucking in a breath as she slowly got to her feet. “Seeing my parents burn would be the best thing since I found Ms. Mead. Seems like she just keeps collecting lost things, huh?”

[Your name] smiled towards him, and he returned it, albeit shyly.  

Despite the wounds on her face, Michael thought she was beautiful.  To [Your name], the man was just beautiful.

She knew all the stories about the Antichrist.  Her parents used to spew Revelations at dinner like it was just normal gossip.

He would be beautiful, have immense powers (even though she was unaware he was still trying to get his powers under control, as his Antichrist nature had just been awoken not too long ago), and in everything that came from what her parents said, she remembered one and thought about it more often than the others: he would be perfect.  

Michael was perfect.

Miriam came back with a yellow box of plastic wrap.  She began to open it up.  

“Will you be okay showering by yourself?  Can you take your clothes off by yourself?”

“I’ll be fine,” she said, waving the woman off.  Miriam just smiled and began to wrap her cast.

“While you do that, I’m going to run to the store and buy some actual clothes for you.  You have some here, but not a lot.  Don’t worry,” she said, finishing up the multiple layers of plastic wrap.  “I still remember your size.  And your favorite scent is…?”

When she told her, Miriam smiled.  

“Good.  I’ll get some things with that as well.  Oh, my [Your name], it’s so good to see your face again,” the woman said.  “I’ll be back.  Michael, stay home.  I’ll just be a few minutes.”

When Miriam left, [Your name] went to shower.  Michael didn’t know what to do, so he went to his bedroom, reading a book that Miriam had stocked on his bookshelf.  Of course, he didn’t realize it was the Satanist Bible until after he started reading it.  However, he was completely distracted by it and was only brought out of his intense reading session when he heard loud cursing coming from the bathroom.  

Michael frowned a bit and marked his page with a piece of scrap paper from his desk.  He quickly got up and went to the bathroom, knocking on the door.  

“Are you okay?” he asked.  

“Uh,” [Your name] began, trying her best not to sound like she was in pain.  “I—yeah, yeah, I’m fine.”  Her voice shook as she tried to get up.  She had fallen in the shower.  The stitches in her side hurt like a bitch, and the pain she had in her leg would stay for a while—her doctor had told her it was a pretty bad sprain, but that it would heal eventually.  And with only one hand available to get herself up, she was stuck at the bottom of the tub.  

“You don’t sound fine…”

[Your name] clenched her jaw and took in a deep breath.  “Could you—I…  I need help.  I fell,” she said.  

Michael immediately went to open the door.  

“Wait!”

Michael stopped in his tracks.

“You can’t look at me.  Keep your eyes closed.  Please.”

[Your name] wasn’t scared at the fact that he would see her naked—she was more scared of the fact that he would see how damaged her body was.  She should have been more scared of her naked body—in all reality, she had just met him.  

Michael opened the door, making sure that she saw his eyes were closed.  He walked into the bathroom and quite literally ran into the toilet.  

“I—take like two steps to the left—”

Michael did as he was told.  

“Wait, no, I’m sorry, it’s your right—” she stopped herself and squeezed her eyes shut.  “Just… Just open your eyes.  It’ll be easier.”

“Are you sure?” Michael asked.  His voice was soft, like buttercream on a birthday cake.  

“Yeah, I’m sure.”

Michael opened his blue eyes.  He locked eyes with [Your name] and his expression softened.  It was the look at [Your name] hated more than anything.

The look of pity when people realized why she was always hurt.  He had the same expression.  Michael walked over to her and turned the steaming water off.  He carefully hooked his arms underneath hers and got her to her feet.

“Did you already shower?” he asked.  

She shook her head.  “No.”

“Alright,” he looked down at her.  He avoided looking at her body.  He made sure to keep his eyes on hers.  “I’ll—I’ll be right in the other room if you need me, okay?”

When [Your name] nodded, Michael turned the water back on for her and left the bathroom.  It didn’t happen again, but Michael sat on the edge of his bed, listening for anything.

He was stiff, and he was barely breathing as he listened for the woman to hurt herself again.  When the water shut off, this time by [Your name]’s hand and not his own, he finally took in a much-deserved breath.  He closed his eyes, laying back on his bed.  He was so worried for the woman that he hadn’t even heard the front door shut.  When he heard Ms. Mead’s voice, he shot up from his bed and ran downstairs to help her.

He took each of the bags from the older woman.  

“Take these to the guest room, okay?  The one with the white bed.”

Michael nodded and rushed off, with five bags of things she would need on one arm and six on the other.

[Your name] came out of the bathroom with the clothes on that Michael had grabbed earlier, her free hand drying her hair the best she could.  

Michael sat everything on the bed and came back out of the room, seeing her.

His eyes widened.  “I can do that for you—”

“I… I got it,” [Your name] mumbled, her cheeks burning at the thought that he would look at her like he did before.  She looked over at him, and she nearly stopped drying her hair.  She couldn’t describe his expression—but it wasn’t like it was before.  

Michael crossed his arms over his chest.  “Your room.  It’s this one,” he pointed to the door behind him.  

“Thank you,” she said, walking towards it.  

Michael grabbed her by her elbow, looking right at her.  “Let me do your hair.”

Her eyes widened.  “What—”

“—let me do your hair.  I want to help you.”

Throughout all of her thoughts, one stuck out the most: why was the Antichrist being so kind to her?

Michael didn’t wait for her to answer, leading her back into the bedroom.  He began to search through the plastic bags, eventually finding the items Ms. Mead bought for her hair.  He forced [Your name] to sit down on the edge of the bed and Michael got behind her.  He finished towel drying her hair and then proceeded to use what Ms. Mead had bought, with the instructions that [Your name] was given him.  He had never even tried to fix anyone else’s hair before—he had only taken care of his own.  It gave him a sense of pride to know that [Your name] hadn’t denied his help, this time.

[]

Days turned into weeks.  Weeks turned into months.  

Eventually, Michael and [Your name] were quite close—much to Miriam’s excitement.

Although she never said anything, she quite liked the idea of them being so close.  It made her confident heart soar with happiness at the thought that the two people she cared for most in the world were just as close to each other as they were to her.  

Despite their closeness, however, Michael disappeared after being taken to jail.

He hadn’t been able to contact [Your name] until about a week after being gone.

“Hello?” [Your name] spoke into the telephone, confused.  She didn’t know the number that had called.  

“[Your name],” Michael said.  He closed his eyes, melting at the sound of her voice.  

“Michael?” [Your name] quickly sat up, alert.  “What the hell, Michael?  Where are you?  Are you okay? Wh—”

“—I’m alright,” he chuckled softly.  “Things have kind of… happened.  I’m at a school for Warlocks.  I’m ‘honing’ my magic.  That’s what they said, anyway,” he spoke, leaning against the wall behind him as he talked on the phone.  “[Your name], they want me to be the next Supreme.”

“I… would be super excited for you, if I would know what the fuck that is,” she scoffed.  “Michael, seriously.  What’s going on?”

Michael chuckled at her comment.  “I’m safe.  I promise you.  But this is how I do my job.  As the… well, you know.”  

“Yeah, yeah.  But what—”

“—listen, I have to go.  I have to get back to class.  But I’ll call you.  Please know that I’m safe.  It was so good to hear your voice, [Your name].  Make sure Ms. Mead knows that I’ll get in contact with both of you soon.”

Michael hung up the phone.

What [Your name] didn’t know was that Michael had already been in contact with Ms. Mead.  And the two were conspiring against the Warlocks to make it easier for Michael to reach the title of Supreme, and therefore, bring around the end of the world.

[]

Another week passed without a word from Michael.

[Your name] was more nervous than words could put together.  Although the two were just close friends, she quite missed his absence.  She was starting to believe she wanted to be much more than friends, but she would never say anything about it.  

[Your name] sat at the dining room table, wondering where the hell Ms. Mead was.

She had been gone since early morning.

She heard the front door shut and had come downstairs to see what was going on—Ms. Mead was nowhere in sight, and she hadn’t left any sort of note.  

It was nearing noon when the house phone began to ring.  

[Your name] sighed, figuring it was Miriam.  She got up and walked over to the phone, answering it.  

“Hello?”

“[Your name],” Michael’s voice came through the speaker.  “They’ve killed her.”

[Your name] paused for a moment.  She sucked in a breath through her teeth, sitting back down at the dining room table.  “What are you talking about?”

“The witches.  They killed her.  They killed Ms. Mead.”

Only now did [Your name] hear Michael’s sobs.  He must have moved the phone away from his head moments before, preventing her from hearing it.  

A feeling of dread pooled into her stomach.  The news seemed fake—unreal, to her in the sense that it couldn’t have happened.  It didn’t happen.  Miriam was fine.  She had to be.

Her breathing was uneasy as she quickly stood back up.  “Where are you?”

Michael told her his exact location—it wasn’t too hard to find, and she would be able to get there pretty quickly.  

[Your name] hung up the phone and grabbed some cash and car keys, before she ran outside.  She ran to the car that still sat in the driveway.  She should have known.  She should have checked.  Ms. Mead wouldn’t have just left for a walk.  She would have said something.  

[Your name] entered the location onto the GPS in the car.  She took off driving, tears blurring her vision, but she never once stopped.  When there wasn’t a cop or a car nearby, she ran through the red lights.  She sped until she got to the location.  

She quickly slammed on the breaks, putting the car in park.  She turned it off and quickly got out of the car, nearly tripping over herself as she planted her feet on the ground.

Michael quickly looked over his shoulder, his eyes wide when he saw her.

He forced himself off of the ground, rushing in her direction.  [Your name] met him halfway, her arms tightly wrapping around his body.  She let out a soft sob and Michael hugged her back, burying his face in her hair.          

“[Your name],” he said, tears forming in his own eyes.  

She shook her head, her fingers digging into the fabric of his black suit.

Michael’s fingers gently tangled in her hair as he pulled back to look down at her.  Red rimmed the edge of his eyes.

He had been crying, for some time now.  [Your name] looked up at him, trying to keep herself calm.  

“Michael,” she bit her lip, holding back a sob as she watched him.  “What happened… why did this happen?”

Michael shook his head.  He would have spoken, had it not been for the blonde witch who walked up to the two, a black umbrella hovering over her head.  

Cordelia’s eyes widened when she realized that Michael was not alone.  

Michael quickly pushed [Your name] behind him, glaring in Cordelia’s direction.

He didn’t give her a chance to speak, his hand reaching back and gripping onto [Your name]’s.  “I’ll kill you,” Michael seethed, his body shaking slightly out of rage.  “I’ll kill you and all your damn witches.  You stupid—”

[Your name] squeezed his hand.  He stopped talking, clenching his jaw.  

Cordelia looked from Michael to [Your name] before she gave a curt nod and left them standing there.  

Michael quickly turned to face [Your name].  “Never again.  I will never let you leave my sight,” he said.  “Ever.  I… You’re all I have,” he frowned, cupping her cheeks as he spoke.

[Your name] reached up, placing her hands over the top of his.  “You’re all I have, too, Michael,” she said, closing her eyes.  “I…  I’m so sorry.  I… I should have realized something was wrong earlier—”

“—you wouldn’t have known what they were planning to do.  I didn’t know, either,” he said, frowning deeply.  “But they will pay for this.  They all will.  Every last one of those damned witches.  You have my word.”

“I know I do,” [Your name] said, looking up at the man.  “Michael, can we—can we go home?” she asked, looking past him at the charred remains of the only good woman in her life.  “I… I think we should pack our things.  Leave.  It’s not safe here…”

“You’re right,” he frowned.  “But [Your name], it’s just going to get worse.  You… you have to promise me you’ll be by my side.  Always.”

“Always,” she nodded.  

“Good,” Michael said, pulling her into another hug.  He rested his head on her chin.  He would protect her until the end of time.  The thought of letting her go now made his insides boil.  She would never leave his side—never.  The only way she’d leave him is through death, and even then, he would bring her back. No matter what.  

[harrysweasleys]

yellow sundress // f.w

summary: fred spots you at bill and fleur’s wedding and can’t keep you off his mind.

warnings: none

word count: 3.2k

a/n: let’s all pretend there’s no war and the wedding doesn’t end horribly, shall we? (for my own sanity, of course) :) xx enjoy!

—

Fred was happy for his brother, really. Bill was always the most mature of the Weasley clan — well, according to Molly, anyways. Always boasting about how Bill had his life in order and how he’d go on to do great things. So, although Fred grew up feeling slightly envious of his big brother, today he was happy. Happy for him and happy that there was finally something for the family to celebrate.

He had found himself rather excited the morning of the wedding. Him and George had spent the night at the burrow — Molly’s orders — so they could prepare and set up the tent bright and early. Arrangements for the wedding had been made very last minute indeed, so the panic and rush was still happening hours before the happy couple were to say ‘I do.’

The early morning grass was still wet with dew drops, shimmering like little diamonds under the hazy sunshine. The field was quiet except for the occasional caw of a bird or the screech of an insect. 

Though sunny, it wasn’t overly warm. Fred found it just comfortable to wear a long sleeved shirt under his waistcoat, preventing goosebumps from rising on his skin every time the morning breeze rolled around. There wasn’t much heavy lifting to be done, thanks to magic, so Fred found himself sitting back with his brothers, only ever occasionally giving a lazy flick of his wand to pitch in.

“So, no date?” Ron walked up to Fred, crossing his arms across his chest and giving his brother a small smirk as they finished pinning the tent into the ground.

Fred scoffed, “Coming from you?”

Ron rolled his eyes, “You’re older than me, you need to get a move on. Maybe you’re next,” he joked, motioning his hands to the wedding preparations.

Fred fought the urge to smack him across the back of the head, “You hilarious little git.”

Ron’s laughter echoed in Fred’s ears, a taunting reminder that he indeed did not have someone in his life. Someone that he could have on his arm right now, someone that he could end up dancing the night away with. Although Fred teased Ron about his bad luck with women, he knew his little brother fancied Hermione, and she felt the same way back. It was only a matter of time before the two ran off into the sunset together, really.

Fred scoffed at the thought of his youngest brother getting married before him.

The tent was up and ready in no time, a few of the distant Weasley cousins and some old school friends of Bill’s already underneath it, setting up tables and chairs so that there was room for people to sit. 

Molly called his name from inside the house, her head sticking out of the kitchen window and her arms waving wildly; a clear sign to Fred that he should rush over.

“What is it?” he asked as he entered through the doorway, ducking his head to avoid hitting one of the wooden beams hanging low by the kitchen entrance. A beam that he had whacked his heads so many times on when he was growing up that he was surprised his Boggart didn’t turn into it when he was still in school.

“Carry these out!” Molly huffed, shoving multiple large trays of goods into his arms, her hair sticking out all over the place and her apron stained with icing and different kinds of sauces.

Fred agreed, walking ever so slowly out of the house and placing the heavy, unbalanced trays on the closest table he could find, not wishing to spill anything and unleash his mother’s wrath so early in the day. He let out a long sigh as he looked around at the ongoing preparations, the sun now higher in the sky and making it easier to do things under the bright light.

Too occupied with watching over everything, he hadn’t noticed a body approach him and stand by his side.

“Fred Weasley, as I live and breathe,” a soft voice caught Fred out of his daze, blinking his eyes to refocus as he looked down to face the person who had nearly startled him. 

You were standing there, hair tied back loosely and a bright smile on your face. You were wearing a light yellow sundress, a cardigan sitting on your shoulders as you held onto a small clutch purse. Though Fred didn’t know his perfumes, he could smell a sweet mixture of honey and rose coming from your direction. A smell that Fred, up until this point, never considered to be beautiful. But as he looked down at you, your expectant eyes awaiting an answer, Fred found that everything about you was beautiful. 

“Do we know each other?” Fred asked lamely, internally rolling his eyes at himself. He had a feeling that if he had seen you before, he wouldn’t have forgotten. 

Your smile changed from soft to amused, “I see I didn’t make a lasting impression,” Fred felt his own lips turn downwards into a frown as you let out a small giggle, “We went to Hogwarts together.”

He scanned you up and down trying to find anything that could spark recognition, but he failed, “Were we in the same year?”

You shook your head, “I was below you. The year below you, I mean. Not — I — you know what I meant. I’m Y/N.”

Fred felt a smile take over his face as you looked down to the ground, “It’s lovely to meet you, Y/N.”

“Technically, we’ve met before,” you pointed out, a sly grin on your lips, “I was also there when the goblet of fire ejected you as an old man. Classic, really.”

Rubbing the back of his neck and laughing sheepishly, Fred cursed his younger self for acting like such a fool, “Not one of my brightest moments, I must admit.”

You let out a bubbly laugh and Fred swore he lost his breath.

“I found it amusing. Never dull, you two.”

A sense of pride buzzed in Fred’s chest, glad that he could make some amusing memories for you. Glad that you even remembered him. How Fred never noticed you while at school, he’ll never be able to answer.

“Well,” you adjusted your cardigan around yourself and gave him a little wave, “I’ll see you later. I’ve got to go help Fleur.”

Before he could bid you bye, you scurried off into the house. He heard you and Molly greet each other before the sound of your footsteps rushing up the stairs echoed throughout the house and through the open window.

A grin was still on Fred’s face long after you were gone. What it was about you, he didn’t know. But he couldn’t remember ever being so intrigued by a person before after such a short encounter. You had completely captivated him in the two minute conversation that was shared. Fred, who had made it this long without being in a serious relationship or committing to anyone, suddenly had an overwhelming urge to get to know you better.

—

Silent conversations bled throughout the seated crowd, everyone chatting quietly with the people around them as they awaited the ceremony to begin. Half of the people were familiar, but the other half were Fleur’s invites. People that none of the Weasley family had ever met — people who, as they scanned their surroundings, clearly still weren’t overly fond about having a wedding outside an old house in the middle of a field.

Old school friends gathered left and right, greeting each other and reminiscing about fond memories. Memories that, in this moment, felt so distant and gone. As if school was ages ago instead of only a year and a bit. A lot had changed over the course of twelve months

Without really knowing he was doing it, Fred’s bored eyes scanned the crowd, looking out for the familiar yellow dress. He had already greeted everyone that figured there was no point in getting up to talk if the ceremony was minutes away from starting.

“Looking for someone?” George poked him on the shoulder, a crooked smirk on his face. He couldn’t give a proper one — the bandage wrapped tightly around his head prevented him from doing so.

“Do you remember an Y/N when we were at Hogwarts?” Fred asked, eyes turning to his twin.

George nodded, “Yeah. Wasn’t she friends with Ginny and Luna?”

“Blimey, I need a better memory,” Fred frowned. He had never raked through his brain more than in the last hour, trying to find any sort of scrap, but had very little success.

“Why?” George wiggled his eyebrows, “Someone looking for her?”

Fred rolled his eyes and leaned back in his chair, not answering his brother. Not that he had the chance, really, as the scent of honey and rose filled his senses once again, your bright yellow dress catching his attention from the corner of his eye. He hadn’t even noticed the empty chair next to him, but as you took your seat there, he was thankful that it had been empty.

“Oh, hey,” you smiled, removing your cardigan and placing it on the back of your chair, “Were you saving this seat? Sorry, there’s nowhere else.”

“No,” Fred muttered quickly, “You can sit here.”

George let out a low chuckle and Fred imagined himself turning around and whacking him across the head. But, fortunately for George, the very image stayed in his mind.

The ceremony began shortly after, but Fred couldn’t focus much. Only when you nudged him in the side and told him to stand for Fleur’s entrance did he notice how zoned out he really was.

His cheeks and ears felt warm but he was lucky you didn’t notice, a wide grin on your face and your eyes slightly watery as you watched Fleur walk down the aisle, an equally happy Bill watching her every movement with such love in his eyes, even Fred couldn’t help but feel the overwhelming emotions.

They said their ‘I do’s’ and the ceremony came to a close an hour later, everyone clapping loudly.

You disappeared into the crowd and Fred made his way to the reception tent, finding his table and sitting with the rest of his siblings. The atmosphere was calm, soothing, and the music gave a pleasant echo of fun. Having not been to many weddings before — or any, really — Fred didn’t know what to expect. He thought it would be loud, chaotic, and people would be toppling over each other on the dance floor.

That, however, was not the case.

As the afternoon turned to early evening, a few couples had come and gone from the dance floor, a few meals had been eaten, and the music playlist continued to produce a good enough array of songs for Fred not to become overly bored. Molly had strongly suggested playing Celestina Warbeck and was still bitter that Fleur rejected her upfront, but she seemed to be enjoying the evening as she moved to the music on the dance floor alongside her husband.

“You gonna ask Hermione to dance?” George nudged Ron in the side, Fred chuckling at his younger brother’s clear discomfort.

Ron’s cheeks flared pink, “Blood hell, no. She’s with Krum.”

The three of them looked over to the centre of the tent where, in fact, Hermione was laughing and dancing with the Bulgarian seeker. The one that Fred had listened to Ron whine about for hours on end in his sixth year.

“Come on, Ronniekins. You could out dance him,” Fred smirked, teasing him.

Giving him the best glare he could muster, Ron grumbled, “Hope she steps on his big feet.”

Fred let out a small laugh and turned back to face the dance floor, his eyes immediately finding you. He tried telling himself it was due to your dress, but that was only because he didn’t want to admit how beautiful he found you. How he currently wanted nothing more than to rush over there and ask you to dance.

Odd, Fred thought, I’ve never wanted to dance with anyone.

“What about you Freddie?” Ron turned the attention away from him, “I see you eyeing her. Just go ask her to dance or I’ll go do it for you and I reckon I’d make it way more bloody awkward.”

Trying his best to act nonchalant, Fred grumbled, “I dunno what you’re talking about.”

“Oh, really?” George’s eyes sparkled with mischief and as much as Fred usually liked that, he didn’t like it so much right now, “Then you wont mind if I go talk to her—”

“Sit down, you git,” he snapped quietly, eyes darting away from where you were standing and chatting with Luna before he glared daggers at his two sniggering brothers, “Both of you need to shut it.”

“Just go,” George said, taking a sip of firewhisky, “Someone’ll snatch your spot.”

Fred took a deep breath and stood up, wishing to get away from his idiotic family. His heart was racing against his rib cage, uneasiness and nerves spreading throughout his entire body as he slowly walked towards the floor. He stopped to look at anything and everything along the way, stalling the interaction as much as possible. Asking Angelina to the ball had been casual — he never really fancied her the way one should fancy a date. It was more of a friendly thing. But as he looked over at you, your contagious laughter reaching his ears and your cheeks slightly pink, he realized that this was so very different. So very nauseating.

“Fred,” you smiled up at him, catching Fred off guard. He hadn’t even noticed that he walked up to you, but as he heard George muttering behind him, he realized his twin probably gave him a good shove in your general direction.

“Hi,” he smiled down at you, “Hello, Luna.” He greeted your friend, who gave him a dreamy wave before stalking off through the crowd with a smile on her face.

“She’s had a lot of gigglewater,” you informed him, “Told me about seven times that she thought I looked like Pygmy puff.”

Fred found himself laughing, “I don’t think you look like one. I don’t remember Pygmy puffs being so stunning — and I’d know, Ginny had one of those little rats.”

Your eyes widened and your smiled faltered just a tad, “You think I’m stunning?”

“Yeah,” Fred suppressed his nerves the best that he could, “I actually wanted to ask if you wanted to dance.”

He saw you take a deep breath, placing your glass down on the nearest table before holding out your hand, “I’d love to.”

Your hand was warm as it laced in with his, a sudden wave of confidence flowing over him at the contact.

He led you out to the dance floor, your body close to his as you linked your arms behind his neck, his hands holding your waist. He felt his breath stutter as your fingers grazed the sensitive skin at the nape of his neck, his lips curling up into a satisfied smile.

“Do you know how to dance?” you asked, looking down at your feet as you actively avoided stepping on his feet, the two of you slowly beginning to sway to the music.

“Nope,” Fred grinned, “Winging it.”

You chuckled, tossing a loose strand of hair out of your face before gazing back up at him, “Apologies in advance if I step on your feet—”

Right as you said that, Fred felt the tip of your shoe dig into the top of his foot. Your eyes shot wide open and you stepped back, tensing up.

“I am so sorry!”

Fred removed a hand from your waist and pressed it over his heart, “You wounded me, woman.”

Guilt left your face and you broke into another fit of giggles, stepping close to him once again, your hands finding their spot at the back of his neck as you muttered another apology. Fred couldn’t remember ever dancing like this with anyone before. Though you two were currently only friends — if even that — he felt like your movements were intimate, close, and he wanted to continue dancing with you until the sun was gone and rising back up again.

“You’re such a dork,” you laughed, resting your head against his chest. He was tall enough that you could do so without leaning over. Fred hoped to Godric that you couldn’t hear how violently his heart was beating.

“I’ve been told,” he chuckled, the vibrations causing you to pull away and smile up at him.

He stared down into your eyes, his own face falling into a serious trance. As cliche as it was, he felt as if the two of you were alone. That the wedding had died down and the dance floor was meant for you and you alone. That no one could ruin this little moment. He could smell your intoxicating perfume and it was rendering his mind slightly blank.

Fred Weasley didn’t fall for anyone in one day. Especially someone that he had never met before. But here he was, the only thing on his mind being that he wanted to dance the night and morning away with you. That he wanted to take you to dinner. To bring you to the shop.

“Something on your mind?” you asked, a tone of inquisition in your voice as you peered up at him.

“You,” he replied, stopping in his step completely when he heard himself, “I — that came off awfully weird.”

“It came off awfully sweet,” you stopped dancing with him, smiling brightly, “For someone who doesn’t remember me, you sure seem to be warming up rather quickly. I’m not complaining, though.”

Fred had never been happier for his boldness than in this exact moment.

“Coffee?” you asked, beginning to move to the music once more, Fred following in your step. He found himself stumbling over his feet just a bit, but he played it off well enough that he was certain you hadn’t even noticed.

“I like coffee but it’s a little late now,” he smirked to himself, knowing what you meant but deciding to tease you just a tad.

You scoffed, rolling your eyes playfully, “Oi, you know what I meant.”

He chuckled, cheeks hurting from how much smiling he had done this evening, “Of course I do. But here, let me ask. Y/N, would you accompany me to dinner and coffee tomorrow night?”

You pretended to ponder, the tips of your ears slightly redder than they were a few seconds ago, “I would need to check my schedule but I believe I’m free.”

“Good,” Fred grinned, heart doing a summersault in his chest as you beamed up at him, your body pressed against his as the two of you continued to get lost in each other.

Luckily for Fred, you were too busy focused on him to notice Ron and George shooting thumbs up your way, their knowing grins taunting Fred from across the dance floor. But, as Fred looked down at you, he thought he didn’t really care.

After all, Fred Weasley has a date.

—

taglist

@grierpilots

@hxfflxpxffs

@mikumana

@msmimimerton

@pit-and-the-pen

@diary-of-an-onliner

@theweirdsideofstuff

@thoseofgreatambition

@theweasleysredhair

@haphazardhufflepuff

@almostweepingbanana

@ickle-ronniekins

@iprobablyshipit91

@wand3ringr0s3

@susceptible-but-siriusexual

@starlightweasley

@mytreec

@thisismysketchbook​

(message me to be added!)

[worldserasingandcreatinginmymind]

Unfaithful | Part Four

Series Summary: After dreaming of your perfect wedding since you were a little girl the big day is almost here. But after meeting the priest you start to question your relationship.

Pairing: Hot Priest x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2900 

Warnings: angst, toxic relationship, emotional blackmail 

A/N: Please be warned there will be some themes of toxic/abusive relationship in this series. Also, spelling and grammar is not my strongest skill so please be kind :)

Part Three | Masterlist

- - - -

“Father?” 

A voice calling out in the church stops us mid kiss.

“Oh shit, it’s Pam!” The Priest whispers, eyes wide.

“Father, are you in here?” She calls out again.

Remembering his confession about hiding from her I can’t help but find it amusing we’re now both hiding in this tiny box. A tiny giggle escapes my lips and the Priest shushes me, placing his hand gently over my mouth. 

After a minute Pam finally retreats back to her room, leaving us alone. The priest waits another few seconds before removing his hand and letting out a sigh. 

“That was too close” 

“Was kinda hot though” I reply, planting a kiss on his lips.

“Yeah it was” he laughs, kissing me back “but we should probably move this back to my office incase she comes back” He kisses me again and takes my hand. He pokes his head out from the curtain to check no ones there before leading me out the confession box and to his office. He shuts the door and to my surprise spins me around till my back falls against it. He immediately resumes kissing me, letting out small breathless moans as our tongues explore each others mouths. His hands find their way from my hips, up my sides and to the buttons of my shirt. I place my hands over his, stopping him.

“Do you mind if we don’t, just yet.. I'm not- I'm not ready for that” I stutter “I'm sorry”

He plants a kiss on my forehead before leaning his forehead against mine.

“We don’t have to do anything until you're ready” he whispers and smiles a genuine, loving smile which I return. 

“Can we just cuddle for a bit?” I ask shyly

“Of course” 

He leads me over to the two seater sofa and sits down, gently pulling me down with him and wrapping himself around me. 

Laying on the Priest’s small sofa, my head on his chest and his arms around me, I feel like I’ve died and gone to heaven. We stay like that for at least ten minutes, silently enjoying the blissful feeling of each others company. 

I tilt my head to look up at him and find him watching me. 

“What?” I giggle, feeling slightly self conscious under his gaze. 

“Nothing, just- thinking”

“About what?”

“It doesn’t matter”

He smiles at me and places a kiss on my forehead. He brings his hand up to stroke the side of my face, his thumb gently glides over my burns and his face changes. There’s a hint of sadness in his eyes. 

“He did this to you, didn’t he?”

I nod, biting my lip slightly. 

“Because you were with me?” 

“No” I reply quickly, not wanting him to think this was his fault “lt was my fault, I called him pathetic”

“That’s no excuse to hurt you!” 

“It’s always been a trigger word for Daniel.” I explain and he looks at me confused. I remove myself from under his arms and sit up to face him “His father always used to call him that. He wasn’t a very nice man, he was an alcoholic with anger issues. He used to beat Daniel’s mother in front of him and tell him it was his fault. And if he cried, like any child would, he told him he was pathetic.”

“That’s awful”

“When Daniel’s mother died, his dad changed. Started going to church and completely turned his life around. He was like a new man. But Daniel never forgave him. Even after he died, he just couldn’t. And I don't blame him, I can’t imagine the things he must have seen. At the funeral all these people from the church kept telling Daniel that his father was up in heaven watching over him, and he hated it. The idea that this man who did such horrendous things was allowed be in heaven, it made him so angry. That’s why he’s got such an issue with you. It’s not really about you personally, it’s what you stand for. Just religion in general.”

“Then why get married in a church?”

“My fault again. I had to beg and beg him to let me have the wedding here. My parents aren’t around anymore either but I have such fond memories of being here with them that I thought if we had the wedding here it would feel like they were with me. I know must sound silly-”

“Not at all, it’s a lovely thought. I bet they’d be so proud of you.”

“I hope so” 

The sound of the phone ringing pulls us out of our conversation. The Priest goes to his desk and picks up the phone. 

“Hello?” He answers with a cheery voice. 

Suddenly the smiles disappears from his face and he looks at me with wide eyes.

“Oh hi Daniel”

My heart stops. I feel like I could throw up. What the hell is Daniel doing calling the Priest? Does he know I’m here? Does he know what we’ve done?

“Slow down, say that again”

I watch intently as the Priest listens to Daniel on the other end, trying to figure out from his facial expressions what they’re talking about. 

“No I haven’t seen her” he lies “Why? What’s happened?” 

He must be asking about me. I take my phone from my pocket and power it on. I had turned it off in the hospital and completely forgot to turn it back on again. Multiple messages and endless missed calls from Daniel. 

“Don't worry, I’m sure she’s fine. If I see her I’ll let her know you're looking for her okay? Okay bye Daniel” he puts the phone down and looks up at me again “he sounds like he’s really panicking about you”

“Good!”

“You need to go home” the Priest says, walking over to me

“I don't want to” 

“I know. But you're gonna have to face him sooner or later” he puts his hands on my shoulders and I look up into his eyes before letting out a sigh.

“You're right. I should go. Thank you, for everything” I smile at him giving him a quick kiss before heading to the door. 

“Y/N?” He calls after me and I turn back to look at him “none of it is your fault”  

— — — —

The moment I step through the front door Daniel comes running, full of apologies. 

“Oh my God, Y/N. I’m sorry. Are you okay? Please forgive me. I love you so much. What did the hospital say?” 

“It will heal eventually. They gave me some cream for the pain.”

“I am so sorry! I’m gonna change-”

“I’ve heard it all before” I snap

“I know, I know- but I mean it. Here, let me take your shoes off for you”

“I don't need your help” I say, kicking my shoes off

“Let me take care of you! Go to bed and I’ll come up in a minute. Please, I want to make it up to you”

I stare him out for a moment before giving in and doing as he says. I get into some fresh pyjamas and climb into bed. A few minutes later I hear him coming upstairs.

“I made you a fresh coffee, since you didn’t get to drink yours this morning” 

He puts the coffee on the bedside table and sits on the edge of the bed next to me. He takes the cream from the table and squeezes some onto his fingers. He reaches towards me and I instinctively flinch away from his touch.

“Please, let me do this” he says quietly and I give him a small nod. 

I can’t help but let out a small whimper of pain as he touches my skin.

“Sorry!” 

I can't even look at him. I can hear from his voice he’s trying not to cry and the last thing I want to feel right now is pity for him. 

Once he’s finished applying the cream he wipes his hands on a tissue and climbs into bed next to me. He cautiously reaches over to put his arm around me, and because I don't have to the energy to argue I allow him to pull me in to cuddle up to him. 

He takes the remote from his bedside table drawer and turns the tv on. 

“What do you want to watch?” 

“We need to talk” I say and he turns the tv off again, releasing me from his arm and sitting up to look at me. He looks terrified.

“Okay?”

“Look I’ve been thinking-”

“Please” he interrupts, grabbing my hands and begging “don't break up with me!”

“Daniel” I sigh 

“I’ve been panicking all day thinking that you’d left me. If you hadn’t come home, I don't know what I would have done… I can’t live without you by my side.”

“Stop! I’m not breaking up with you… I just think we need time to work things out”

“What do you mean?” He looks concerned. 

“We should postpone the wedding”

“No! No we don't need to do that. What happened today will never happen again. I promise.” He says and I smirk slightly at hearing yet another empty promise. He notices. “I mean it. Y/N, I have waited over half my life to marry you. I don't wait any longer. I want to call you my wife and show everyone how much I love you!”

I watch as he squeezes my hand tightly in his own, almost as if he’s scared I’ll suddenly slip away and he’ll lose me. His eyes search mine and I can see the desperate panic he feels. I let out a sigh. 

“Okay, we’ll keep the set date.” I finally say and I see the relief flood through Daniel “but I don't think we should get married in the church”

“I thought that’s what you wanted”

“I do- I did. But you clearly don't want to and that’s okay. We’ll find somewhere that makes us both happy.”

“No, I don't want my issues to be the reason you don't get your dream wedding. We’re getting married in the church, and I’m going to make things right with the priest. I promise. When’s the next meeting?”

“Oh, you really don't have to-“

“I want to! It’s the final one before the big day right?” He asks and I nod “then I should definitely go! When is it?”

“Tomorrow afternoon.”

“I’ll be there.”

— — — — 

After another night of dreaming of the Priest, I was awakened by Daniel bringing me breakfast in bed. 

“This looks lovely, thank you” I say as he places the tray over my lap and gives me a kiss on the forehead. A memory flashes in my head of the priest pressing his lips to that same spot yesterday. 

“You're most welcome m’lady” he says in his poshest voice and bows like a butler, making an involuntary giggle escape my mouth “listen I’ve got to pop out but I’ll meet you at the church this afternoon”

“Okay” I nod, highly doubting he’s actually going to turn up. 

“I love you!” He kisses me again before leaving. 

Hearing him say he loves me sends a sudden pang of guilt through me. He loves me. And despite everything I do still love him. So why can’t I stop thinking about the priest? When I’m around him I feel more content than I’ve felt in years. I know I haven't known him for very long but I feel so strongly for him, its insane. 

How can I love two guys at once?

I let out a sigh and shake the thoughts out of my head. 

Once I finish my breakfast I get out of bed, have a shower and get ready for the day. I find myself counting down the hours till I get to see the priest again and as I finally make my way to the church the excited butterflies in my stomach are fluttering so hard I swear they’re going to burst out of me and fly right to him. I turn the corner and smile as I see him standing outside the front door chatting to someone. Our eyes meet and he smiles back at me, sending my heart soaring. That is until the man he’s chatting to turns around and I realise its Daniel. Then my heart feels like it stops all together. I know he said he was going to be here today I just didn’t believe he would actually show up. I’m almost disappointed he’s crashed my alone time with the priest. 

I snap out of it and remind myself I’m supposed to be happy, plastering an over the fake smile on my face as I greet my fiancé. 

“You're here!” I say, unable to hide the surprise in my voice. 

“I said I would be didn’t I? I have something for you, wait here” Daniel says before rushing off toward the carpark. I take my chance to talk to the priest. 

“I can’t believe he actually came”

“He also apologised to me”

“He did what?”

“I know, it’s a miracle!” The priest says sarcastically. 

“Doubt it. I’m sure he’ll be back to his usual self as soon as something gets him angry. I dread to think what he’d do if he ever found out that we...”

“Yeah about that. We both had too much to drink and I think we both said and did things we shouldn’t have. Maybe it’s best if we just... pretend that didn’t happen?”

My heart sinks as I realise what he’s saying. He regrets kissing me. But he told me he loved me! What if that just the alcohol talking? I realise he’s waiting for a response. 

“Of course, yeah you’re right! We were both drunk and I’d had a really bad day. Neither of us were in our right minds. It never happened” 

The priest doesn’t respond, just looks past me to something behind me. I turn around to follow his gaze and see the biggest flower bouquet I’ve ever seen walking towards me with Daniel’s legs. 

���Oh my God” I gasp

“I wanted to get you something as beautiful as you are, but nothing came close. This was the best I could do” 

“Thank you” I say quietly, blushing slightly “this must have cost a fortune!”

“You're worth every penny” he replies and I can’t help but smile as he leans in and kisses me. This is the Daniel I fell for all those years ago, not the man he’s become lately. Could he really have changed back?

“Oh isn’t that lovely” the Priest says, there’s a hint of sarcasm in his voice but it’s so subtle that thankfully Daniel doesn’t catch it “shall we head inside”

— — — — 

The meeting is nothing like I expected it to be. Daniel, being true to his word, was over the top friendly with the Priest. Every question asked, he would answer straight away. He was cracking jokes, telling stories about things we’ve done together and the places we’ve been. I couldn’t get a word in even if I wanted to. Although the Priest was smiling along, I could tell he couldn’t wait for this meeting to be over. He almost looks relieved when Pam knocks on the office door. 

“So sorry to interrupt Father, the Parish council are on the phone. Something about tomorrow’s fundraiser.. shall I tell them to call back later?”

“No no” he says quickly, jumping up from his chair “it’s okay, we’re pretty much done here anyway.” He turns back to look at us “sorry for the abrupt ending but…”

“Of course, we understand” Daniel responds getting up from his chair, and I do the same. 

“Pam will show you out” the Priest holds the door open for us and Daniel walks out behind Pam. I follow but stop at the door, face to face with the priest. 

“Are you okay?” I ask quietly and he nods, not able to look me in the eye. 

“Why wouldn’t I be?” He responds. I study him for a moment before he speaks again “better not keep those parish councillors waiting” I catch his hint and leave the room, taking one last look back at the Priest as he shuts the door before I run to catch up with Daniel and Pam. 

“Will we be seeing you at the fundraiser garden party tomorrow?” Pam asks as I join them at the door.

“I’m working” Daniel answers “but Y/N could”

“I’d love to but I’ve got my hen party tomorrow-” I excuse

“Yeah but that’s in the evening. You’re free all day right?” Dan argues

“uh… yeah I guess I am” I agree, reluctantly 

“Great! The more the merrier” Pam smiles “make sure you bring plenty of cash” 

“Will do. See you tomorrow” I say, giving her a small wave as Daniel and I head to the car. 

Daniel chats constantly on the drive home but I don't listen to a word. Instead my thoughts are consumed by the priest and his dismissive attitude towards me. How in the space of 24 hours can he have gone from telling me he loves me, to now not being able to look at me? 

Was it because Daniel was there? Did I do or say something wrong?

I guess I”ll have to wait till the fundraiser tomorrow to find out. 

Part Five

[kumacyy]

Hi if it’s ok with you can you do one with Gojo x reader where the reader is a strict glasses teacher also at the school who looks gloomy and keeps to themselves mainly but after work one day he runs into them and he find out that they are actually beautiful looking and laid back, with a punk-styled look, piercings and tattoos? I’ve been reading Horimiya lately so it influence this ask.

Different

Ofc I would be more than happy though I'm quite unfamiliar with Horimiya in unfamiliar I ment I still haven't watched the anime

But I did do some research and watched a few clips of Horimiya and I think I got the gist of it and I hope you like it

I'm assuming that the reader is going to be Gender neutral

Unedited

Gojo, Satoru x Teacher! Reader

wc:2k

"Oya?" Gojo mumbled to himself curiously seeing an unknown person walking aimlessly around the school grounds. He was about to approach you that is until the school principal appeared and talked to them. They seem to be agreeing on something of course being the nosy manchild that he is. He interrupted their little conversation with a smug grin. "Whose this? Yaga?" He questioned while looking at you analyzing every detail he sees on your appearance.

Your big beautiful e/n eyes covered by your prescription glasses and your long and sharp nose to your plump lips and your long h/c hair. You were indeed beautiful/handsome "Y/n L/n" you said putting your hand out for him to shake. "Gojo, Satoru" he said taking your hand instead of shaking it like he should he instead kissed your hand "A pleasure to meet ya" he added while winking.

You just looked at him dumbfounded by his flirtation acts and quickly changed into your usual expression. "Pleasure is all mine." you said slipping your hand out of his and gave him a little bow "I would be the new 2nd year teacher." You said with not even showing any ounce of emotion. 'It's like having another Nanami' he thought.

"Well I shall get going and meet my new students it was nice knowing you Gojo-San." You said and started to head to the 2nd year dorms.

1 Month later

A month has passed you got used to everything that happens which consists of Gojo annoying you 24/7 and actually being friends with Nanami. You had been looking after the 2nd years and yes you have met Yuuta he just recently left to go overseas. Let's just say you got attached to them and vise versa to you. Heck You're practically a mother to them. And you recently heard that there are 2 new 1st years and one of them is actually sukuna's vessel.

You were of course curious so you went to talk to Gojo asking of you could join them in picking up the 3rd 1st year. "Oya? You want to come with me? What did I do to be blessed by your presence~" he said teasingly well that's what you thought but in reality he had been interested in you ever since you met. Call it a little crush he always wanted to get your attention wether it was negative or not he still wanted your attention. He was desperate I mean could you blame him you're a god sent.

Your appearance alone made him like you plus you graduated overseas so you're practically multilingual. You were strict but not too strict wherein you would embarass your own students, no you'll just tell them what's right and that they shouldn't do it again. You were soft at some point well you were particularly soft for Megumi and Maki hearing about their past made you pity them. And you also admire them at how strong they were for living through it.

"I just want to meet the 2 new 2st years and sukuna's vessel don't assume stupid things gojo-san" you said ignoring what hi said. "You know y/n-chan you should start calling me sotaru ya know? We've bonded so much from the past month" he said looking serious for once "bonded? More like annoy me" you said giving him a glance and you saw his grin falter a little "But I'll think about it sotaru" You added mumbling the last part.

He immediately brightened when he heard you say his first name and started grinning like an idiot. "Oh and yea you can come with me picking the 3rd 1st year up tomorrow morning at Morioka station" He said happily and left probably going to the first year's dorm.

Time Skip to tomorrow morning

You have arrived at Morioka station alittle early because some Manchild didn't tell you what the time of the pick up is so you explored the place a little. That is until you saw a familiar black spiky hair talking to a boy with pinkish hair and red Hood. You approach them immediately "Megumi!" You called out to him.

"y/n-sensei what are you doing here" he questioned you "I wanted to meet the vessel and the new 1st years" you said and looked at the boy with pinkish hair "is it you?" You added he nodded immediately "Hai! My name is Itadori, Yuji and my type is someone like Jennifer Lawrence!" He introduced himself while bowing you gave him a little nod "it's nice to meet you ita-" you said but got rudely interrupted by the Manchild.

"Sorry for the wait!" "Oh-!" "Y/n-chan you came!! And itadori you wore it" he said 'is it just me or he sounded happier at y/n than itadori/me' both Megumi and itadori thought "Sensei why is my uniform different from megumi's?" Yuji questioned "oh that's because you can hand in requests for the uniforms" Gojo replied "oh but I didn't request anything" Yuji said

"oh that's because I did it I just thought it would look good" Gojo said "oh- what happened to the uniforms I sent you?" He questioned "so it was you" you said " yes! So why didn't you use it?" He asked confirming your thought and with that you glared at him "I burned them" you said

"Huh?! Why??" He whined "who even in the right mind would even wear those" you said referring to the clothes he sent you well don't bother you don't wanna know. "You're disgusting Gojo" you said making a face (ya know like tanjiro's face to zenitsu) after seeing your expression he immediately stopped and started pounting "what happened to Sotaru?" He mumbled to himself hearing you call him by his last name.

"What a child" you and megumi thought. Then you saw a girl wearing what looks like the jujutsu tech uniform "that must be the 3rd 1st year." You mumbled "hey! Over here!" Gojo called out to her which conformed your assumption. And also attracted multiple unwanted attention many complimenting gojo which boosted his ego and made him happy and some talking about how you look good which made his expression falter.

Then after that you all went to a public locker (is that what it's called I'm not sure) where you put money in it to lock it. To put her luggage in and you all started introduce yourselves "the name's kugisaki Nobara" she said "you're lucky to hang out with a girl like me!" She added "I'm yuji itadori and I'm from sendai." He said 'what a hick. Probably a kid who ate his boogers as a kid.' Nobara thought "Megumi Fushiguro" he said 'Just his name? I hate guys who are all high and mighty. I bet he likes terrorizing seagulls by lighting them on fire or something.' Nobara thought then sighed.

"She just looked at us and sighed!" Yuji said then you stepped out behind gojo because he was in front of you (yeah you're short here hehehhehe) "Sorry I was blocked by someone" you said then glared at gojo "My name is Y/n L/n the 2nd year teacher of jujutsu tech" you said putting your hand out to shake "it's nice to meet you." You added "finally someone reliable." Nobara said

"Well! Let's do it a tour of Tokyo!" Gojo stated you and megumi had the same reaction nothing because one thing's for sure and that is he's just going to trick them while the other 2 however immediately fell for it. They started arguing not that you cared it doesn't really matter "we're going to Roppongi!" Gojo said

And that caught your attention you never been to roppongi before and let's just say Gojo noticed that he may be interacting with the 2 excited 1st years but his eyes and attention is all you looks like he is starting to fall in love.

Your Hopes of actually going to roppongi was crushed immediately and same goes with the 2 1st years when you all went to an eerie building that has a curse in it. It was actually a test for the new 1st year to see how "crazy she is" gojo quoted. And after that you all went to eat and went back to the dorms.

Skip to a day later

It was all normal and fine after the meet up no problems happened throughout the day. Well that is until you found out that a certain 1st year just died you were shocked of course. Yesterday he was just fine so you were currently wondering around Tokyo to clear your mind it was raining so it made you calmer most people think that a clear day is calmer you thought otherwise you always preferred staying indoors so you liked the rain.

You were currently wearing your usual clothing when going out, you know like shirt and shorts or something and since you weren't in school you could freely wear your piercings. Well you can wear your piercings in school you just preferred not to you don't want your students to get a piercing because of you, you'd be angry with yourself if that happens.

While walking around you saw a familiar gravity defying white hair and iconic blindfold who looked awfully dejected. From about a few meters from you who looked like getting soaked in rain (just imagine that he isn't using infinity) so you immediately went to his rescue and shielded him from the rain with your umbrella. He immediately looked at the reason why the rain stopped and was shocked that it turns out to be you in casual clothes and wearing piercings.

You looked beautiful/handsome before this just made your beauty skyrocketed to a thousand and he was now more interested in you. The way you have multiple ear piercings and that it's attached to both your ear without looking way too tacky is great and your lip piercing drives him to a frenzy especially when he saw your tongue piercing he just wants to drag you to his house and just do it.

You looked absolutely stunning. And it shocked him even more when you asked him to come with you to your apartment. He of course agreed because who wouldn't want to be alone with their crush I know I wont .

So once you guys went inside your apartment you immediately went straight to the bathroom to bring him a towel to dry off and extra clothes from your brother (If you don't have a brother just imagine you do in this bcs he needs clothes TT) who used to live here and hot coco to keep him warm. He was of course shocked to see that you have mens clothing and thought you have a boyfriend which saddens him but it wouldn't hurt to ask now would it? So he did ask.

"Whose clothes are these" he asked while sitting down on the sofa in front of the TV. Hoping it wasn't from your boyfriend "they were from my brother who used to live with me now he's living with his boyfriend" you said " he was quite a big man I think you guys have the same height so I thought it might fit you" you Added he let out a relieved sigh knowing you're still single. Then it clicked why have you been shutting down all his shots in trying to pursue you.

"Why do you always turn me down?" He asked which made you flinch "I-" you started thinking of a good answer to him "I'm afraid of commitment" you said while looking down (same gurl🤧🤧) "I had a bad past when it comes to relationships it always ends with them cheating me so I try to avoid it." You added "I can change that" he said looking at you holding your hands "I like you I really do" he said eagerly "I like you too" you mumbled he of course heard it "what? What did you just say?" He said trying to know if he wasn't hearing things "I-I said I like your hands" you stuttered and getting flustered.

"Oh..." he said dejected when you saw his expression you immediately felt guilty and left you didn't know how to handle emotions very well so you left to make dinner. He felt sad that you denied it instead of telling him the truth he couldn't blame you you were afraid of course but he wouldn't let that stop him he just grew more confident because of what you said earlier. After making dinner you went to check on him "um do you wanna join me for dinner?" You asked him " it'd be nice to have some company when eating for once." You added

"Yea sure why not" he agreed after dinner you guided him to the door and said your good byes "uh bye" he said about to leave but you stopped him by holding his hand which got his attention. And made him look at you and let's just say he was shocked when you pecked his lips and said "I like you too" then slammed your door to his hitting his face and ran to the kitchen to do the dishes.

To be continued...

Hey guys if you want a part 2 just message me maybe I might even make it a smut one.

So I hope you like it and I still do requests it came a little later than usual but it's because I got sick all of a sudden.

So thank you for reading!!!

[wholesomemendes]

The Winter Ball Date

College/Friends to Lover Au

Summary: When one year you get asked to the annual Winter Ball by someone other than Shawn, the two of you realize what you’ve been looking past for years.

Author’s Note: Long time no see! This is part of Julia’s Winter Writing Challenge by @wondershawns and I am so excited to have participated! My setting prompt was “A knock on the window” and the line “You’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this”. I hope you guys enjoy! As always, I love hearing any type of feedback and I love you all x

Word Count: 8.4k

Presents, Christmas music, your mother’s famous cookies on your tongue, all playing one by one in your mind. The feeling of just being home again instead of in a small, stuffy dorm seemed so close, yet so far away and you couldn’t help but wish that this last month would fly by. A soft nudge to your foot broke you out of your thoughts, “What’s got you in a daze?” You blinked your eyes rapidly to focus your thoughts to the present once again, turning your gaze to the curly haired boy next to you with a bright smile on his face. 

“I’m just thinking about Christmas and being home again,” you sighed dreamily, your head coming to rest on your hand. 

“Christmas is over a month away, you’re better off worrying about finals if you’re thinking that far ahead,” he laughed as a hand came up to lightly push your shoulder.

You cast a harsh glare at him through the dim light of the library, “It’s never too early to start thinking about Christmas. Aren’t you excited?”

“Of course I’m excited.” Shawn leaned back against his chair looking into space, “I get to go home and see family and I only have to worry about my sister instead of a bunch of rowdy frat boys.”

You let out a chuckle at his words, “Aren’t you also a rowdy frat boy?”

“You wound me.” He dramatically placed a hand over his heart, “Besides, I’m more excited to annoy you every day over break.”

“You already annoy me every day.”

“Maybe, but it’ll be much more convenient than me walking all the way across campus to get to your dorm.” You couldn’t lie that he did have a point there. The two of you had been best friends ever since the day your family moved into the house next to his in middle school. You had been inseparable ever since, choosing to go to the same college a few hours from your houses and meeting almost every day since you had joined as freshman. Three years later and nothing had changed, except for how tall Shawn had managed to grow in those years and how the both of you definitely had matured in both personality and appearance since you were in middle school.

“How fortunate for me then,” you laughed, turning your attention back to the abandoned textbook in front of you. 

Shawn’s eyes remained on you, cocking an eyebrow your way, “What, you’re not looking forward to my random visits?” 

“Oh no, I am so looking forward to being woken up in the middle of the night because you can’t sleep.”

“Hey that was only twice!”

“Two times too many if you ask me,” you mumbled under your breath, however the smirk on your face told Shawn that you meant for him to hear it. He simply pulled your chair closer to him and rammed his knuckles into your head until you were laughing and begging him to stop. 

____________________

“You’re coming to the game tonight right?” You had found your way into Shawn’s bed after a full day of classes with your head on his chest, a random hockey game playing on the television across from the two of you. Shawn’s arm provided a comforting warmth as it laid across your stomach, pulling you into him, and each pass of his fingertip onto your skin made you relax further into him. The cuddling wasn’t anything new to the two of you, even the electric feeling you felt from his touch had almost become normal to you. Almost.

“Of course I am. I’ve never missed one, have I?”

“You’re right you haven’t,” he smiled down at you, a stray curl falling in front of his face, “Just wanted to make sure my good luck charm would be there.”

You reached up to brush his hair out of his face, but Shawn quickly grabbed your arm, playfully biting your finger until you pulled away and your wrist was left in his grasp. “I refuse to believe I’m your good luck charm.”

“We’ve been undefeated for three years, hun. You’re my good luck charm.”

“But-”

“Nope, shut it. Don’t want to hear a peep from you.” He pulled you tighter into him before placing a delicate kiss to your hair, “Remind me to give you my jersey for tonight. Want to make sure everyone knows whose good luck charm you are.”

“You’re such a goof.”

____________________

Shawn won. Again. It was no surprise, especially since the team they were up against were no good, but that didn’t mean that you weren’t incredibly proud of him. He absolutely amazed you every time he went out on the ice and you couldn’t help but wait impatiently in the main corridor of the arena. Students rustled around you as you waited though you paid them no mind, simply choosing to admire the banners on the wall instead. The sudden increase in noise caused you to turn your head towards the locker rooms where a certain curly-headed boy was leading a pack of freshly showered athletes. You sprinted past the crowds of people in his direction as Shawn dropped his bag, opting instead to pick you up in his arms as you ran straight into him. You wrapped your legs around him like a koala with your head buried into his neck, breathing in the strong, heady scent of his shampoo. “There’s my good luck charm,” he sighed into your hair and you laughed, only causing a brighter smile to form on his face.

“You were incredible, Shawn. You’re constantly impressing me out there.”

“Thank you,” he smiled, lifting his head to look you in the eyes, “Always means the most coming from my number one fan.”

You flashed him a smile that mirrored his as he slid you down to the floor, making sure that you were always close to him even while others were surrounding him. Your eyes stayed trained on him and the aura that seemed to follow him everywhere he went. They followed the path of his jaw, his neck, to his broad shoulders he always made you massage for him. But before you could finish admiring him, you felt a presence behind you and a slight grasp on your arm. You turned only to be met with a tall figure with beautiful green eyes and dirty blonde hair. He seemed to be about Shawn’s height, maybe an inch shorter, and although his smile wasn’t as bright as Shawn’s was, it still managed to take your breath away for a moment. “Hi, I’m Grant,” the man introduced himself, extending his hand for you to grab, “Are you Shawn’s girlfriend?”

You turned your focus back to Shawn who was currently in the middle of a conversation with a couple fraternity brothers and sorority sisters before coming back to this new mysterious man. “Oh no, we’re not, we’re not dating. We’re just best friends.” Grant seemed to have some distrust in his eyes at your words, his eyebrow lifting up slightly in question. “I’m Y/n by the way.” Grabbing his outstretched hand you let yourself appreciate the polite person in front of you.

“I’m sorry I assumed you’re dating. I’m in the frat with Shawn; we’re not good friends or anything but I’ve seen the two of you around in there.” Suddenly your mind clicked to where you had seen him before off of the rink. Most of the boys on the hockey team all resided in the same fraternity so it shouldn’t have been a surprise to you to learn that you had been in the same house as Grant multiple times. “You two are really close, I can’t be the only one that has mistaken the two of you as dating.”

“Yeah…,” you trailed off, sparing a glance back at Shawn, “It happens a lot more than you think. But I promise we’re not. I’m as single as one can be.” Grant’s smile seemed to grow at your words and his shoulders relaxed an inch. 

“Well in that case I actually wanted to ask you…”

“What’s going on over here?” A heavy weight slid across your shoulders, effectively pulling you into a warm body you immediately recognized. You rolled your eyes at the interruption. Perfect timing as always, Shawn. 

“Nothing, just introducing ourselves to one another,” Grant replied, that smile that you were beginning to grow fond of diminishing slightly. 

“Good, was worried that my good luck charm was switching sides.” Shawn sent a pointed look your way with a smirk playing on his lips.

“Good luck charm?”

“Why do you think we haven’t lost a game yet?” Shawn questioned, reaching out to pinch our cheeks, “It’s this little one right here giving me all the luck.” You swatted his hand away bitterly, but his smirk only grew. “Well I’m sure this has been great. Grant, I’ll see you later at the frat and you missy, we have a celebratory dinner to catch.” He maneuvered his way through the people calling his name, bringing you right to his classic jeep.

“You’re horrible you know that right,” you huffed as soon as you got into the seat.

“What ever could you be talking about?” he said innocently.

“If you keep acting like this, I’ll truly never get into a relationship.”

“You’re being silly.”

“Says the one that literally interrupted an entire conversation I had barely even started yet.”

“I was simply worried about you.”

“Mhm, sure.” You stared out the window in protest, not even moving when you felt his hand on your lower thigh.

“Honey, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you liked Grant. I was just looking out for you.”

“Well, I wouldn’t say I like him, I’ve known him for all of five minutes, but it would be nice to maybe explore some options without my personal bodyguard getting in the way.”

“Once again I’m sorry that I got in the way then. I guess Grant is not the worst guy you could have chosen out of the bunch,” he trailed off as he pulled into the diner parking lot the two of you had been frequenting at after almost every hockey game, “Now let’s put this behind us. I’m really craving some fries and a milkshake.” 

____________________

The brisk wind of the courtyard made you tighten your jacket around yourself in a poor attempt to keep the chills away. A sigh of relief escaped your lips once you rounded the corner of the lecture hall you had previously been in, leading you through a row of buildings that temporarily protected you from the harsh weather of Toronto. You kept your eyes trained in front of you, desperately trying to will your feet to somehow move faster to get you to Shawn’s frat house for your usual post-class wind down.

“Hey Y/n!” You whipped your head around to see the source of your name, but after coming up empty handed in the small crowd of students behind you, you shook your head, convincing yourself you just imagined it as you continued your walk. “Y/n, wait!” Pausing this time, you turned your body around completely only to be met with the sight of Grant maneuvering his way carefully around the other students. Upon seeing you stopped, his face light up and he started to jog his way towards you until he was close enough for you to feel some of his body heat. “Hey.”

“Hey, Grant. How are you?”

“I’m good, thanks. Sorry to catch you at such a bad time, but I didn’t know when I was going to see you again,” he confessed, rubbing the back of his neck nervously, “I also didn’t want to wait too long to ask this because I was afraid I’d miss my chance.”

“What’s going on?”

“Are you going to the Winter Ball with anyone?” The Winter Ball was the annual end of the semester party Shawn and Grant’s fraternity held every year that was incredibly exclusive. The only way to get in was if one of the members took you as their date, which meant that almost every girl was dying for someone to ask her. 

At that moment your gaze fell to the beautiful bouquet of red roses that were present in his hands before your eyes lifted to meet his that were so full of hope and nerves. “As of right now I am not. Why do you ask?”

“That’s great! I mean, that’s not great that you’re not going with anyone, but great because I, um, I was wondering if you maybe wanted to go with me?” 

You flashed him a bright smile as he handed the bouquet towards you, “I would love to go with you, Grant.”

“Really? That’s, that’s amazing. I’m looking forward to it.”

“So am I.” 

He wrapped his arms around you in a quick hug before moving the other way, “I hate to leave right away, I’d love to stay and talk, but I really need to get to class.”

You waved him off, “Don’t worry about it. I’ll see you around?”

“Yeah of course,” he began walking away until his eyebrows raised and he came back, “Wait, can I actually get your number?” You saved your number into the contacts of his phone and gave him a wave, heading your way back to the line of frat houses you were looking for. The butterflies in your stomach were doing front flips as you tried to will the humongous smile off of your face. A guy just asked you to be his date to the Winter Ball. A really cute, sweet guy just asked you to be his date to the Winter Ball. Never in a million years did you think someone like him would even imagine asking you to be their date yet here you were, the most delightful smelling roses in your hand and a fluttering feeling in your body. You hardly comprehended that you had already stepped foot into the frat house until you were opening the door to Shawn’s room and falling onto his bed next to him with a dopey smile on your face. 

Shawn looked over at you questioningly from his phone, ‘What’s going on with the flowers and the face?”

“Shawn, you won’t believe it!” you practically squealed, turning onto your side, “Grant just asked me to be his date to the Winter Ball!”

“The Winter Ball?”

“Yes! Isn’t that the best thing ever! I’ve never been asked before!”

“What do you mean? You’ve been my date every year.” If you hadn’t been so caught up with the giddiness in your chest you might have been able to notice the fleeting look of sadness in his eyes as he spoke.

“That’s not the same though. I wasn’t really your date, we just went as friends.”

“Yeah, but you were still considered my date.”

“Still, it’s not the same thing.” 

A small moment of silence took over the room before Shawn cleared his throat. “So...you said yes?”

“Of course I said yes, I’d be stupid not to.” 

“Oh.”

You watched as he focused back on his phone, a tiny frown on his face that you could hardly notice, “What’s wrong.”

“Nothing. I’m glad you’re so happy about this.”

“Don’t lie to me, Mendes, what’s wrong?”

“Just wondering what I’m going to do about a date this year.”

“That’s what you’re upset about?” you looked at him incredulously, “Please, you’re one of the most sought after guys in this school. You could go up to any girl on this entire campus and none of them would even hesitate to say yes.”

“I guess.”

“You guess?” you scoffed, “What about Jessica? I’ve seen the two of you talking a lot at post game parties and everything. You two look like you get along.” 

“Yeah, I could always ask her,” he sighed, “But Jessica isn’t going to drag me into my room at four in the morning asking me to sing her a song on the guitar so she can fall asleep.” He sent a teasing smile your way as he referenced your habit of pulling his hand through crowds of people until you got to his room when you felt too tired and wanted to go to sleep.

“I’m sorry, Shawn. I promise I’ll make it up to you.” You thought for a moment, “I know! I’ll buy you pizza from your favorite pizza place! You know, the one across from the campus coffee shop where they put extra cheese on top.”

“That’s not my favorite pizza place.”

“But every time we go there you say…”

“I only say that because I know it’s your favorite pizza place.” His gaze fell soft upon you, “Don’t get me wrong it’s not bad, but I don’t have a favorite and I know you’re more likely to go there if I said it’s also my favorite.”

“Oh,” you looked down at your hands, “Well thank you.” Shawn hummed in response, his eyes traveling back to his phone. “You can still come over beforehand to get ready together like we always do.”

He let out a sad chuckle, “Don’t think Grant would much like that, honey.”

“That’s too bad if he doesn’t like it because it’s important to me that we get ready together and you’re the first person to see me all fancied up.” 

Shawn swore he felt his heart stutter in his chest, “If you want me over, I’d be more than happy to get ready with you.”

“Perfect, it’s a date.”

____________________

You couldn’t lie and say it didn’t hurt when you noticed that Shawn had been a little more distant with you in the past week. Your texts sat on delivered for longer, you were no longer going over to his room after every lecture due to him “being busy”, and the nightly FaceTime calls were no longer nightly. You blamed it on hockey practices piling up and finals getting closer but in reality, you knew that wasn’t the case. There was only a week until finals, and therefore the Winter Ball, when you finally ran into Shawn again on your way to a class, very obviously catching him off guard. “Hey, long time no see.”

“Yeah, sorry about that. I’ve been really busy lately,” he told you, but you knew him long enough to tell that the way his eyes wouldn’t maintain contact with you was a telltale sign that there was more to the story.

“Don’t worry about it, just miss you is all. Did you find a date yet for the ball?”

“Oh yeah, I asked Jessica like you told me to.”

“That’s great! Are you doing anything later today?”

“Uh, I don’t know…”

“I’m going dress shopping for the Winter Ball if you want to come with me like you always do.”

“Uh…”

“Come on, Shawn, you’re not going to break tradition are you?” 

He desperately wanted to respond with, “You already broke a tradition by ditching me without warning and going with Grant,” but he bit his tongue. “Sure,” he replied with a heavy heart, “I’d love to help you pick out a dress.”

“Yay! Why don’t we go right after class?”

“Ok, I can pick you up at three?”

“Sounds good. I’ll see you later, Mendes!” You left a searing kiss on his cheek before rushing off to class, leaving him staring after you longingly.

____________________

“Any ideas on what you want?” Shawn trailed behind you like a lost puppy as you skimmed your way through the many clothing racks. 

“Not really. Just want something that says ‘Please don’t regret inviting me. I swear I’m a good choice.’”

He couldn’t help the small chuckle that escaped his lips, “I don’t think you need a dress for that. You do that by yourself.”

You bit your lip to contain your smile, “Thank you, but I don’t know if everyone feels that way.”

“Well they should,” he mumbled, his fingers mulling over the beautiful items of clothing. A deep maroon, velvet dress caught his eye immediately and he pulled it out, examining it carefully before nodding his head, “Try this one on.”

“Hm,” you turned to look at him as he studied the dress, “Oh, that’s gorgeous. I’ll try it on if you want me to.”

He nodded his head before turning back to the dresses silently, not making any other comments as you looked around. Once you were satisfied with the dresses in your arms, you headed towards the dressing rooms, looking both ways to ensure that no one was around before pulling Shawn into one with you. He turned around as you changed; sure he had seen you in bikinis before and you were both sure that on more than one occasion when you were drunk that you had both changed in front of one another, but he still had enough respect for you to turn around whilst you put the first dress on. 

The first one was a simple black dress with long sleeves that you thought would be nice for the cold climate that came with living in Canada and although it was flattering, it didn’t feel like anything special. You turned to Shawn with a sigh, “What do you think?”

Personally, from the second you told him to turn around, Shawn swore he had seen an angel. The way the dress hugged your curves had him twitching in his pants and he had to swallow thickly in an attempt to control his thoughts. “I, um, I mean you look beautiful. I like it.”

“Really?” you asked, admiring yourself in the mirror, “I don’t know, it just doesn’t feel special to me.”

“Why don’t you just come back to that one then. I think it’s really pretty on you.”

“Yeah, you’re right I’ll just do that.” Four dresses later and you still hadn’t found the dress for you. There was a dark green one that you didn’t feel complimented your skin tone well enough (Shawn begged to differ), a black one with a plunged neckline that went way too far down for your comfort zone (Shawn was glad he didn’t have to protest against that one, he didn’t particularly like the idea of all the drunk, disrespectful boys in the frat seeing that), another black one that went too far down your legs (even though Shawn argued that it would keep your legs warm), and a light blue one that didn’t really fit your feeling of winter (Shawn almost lost his mind when you had bent down in front of him in that one to pick up a loose string that had fallen off of it). 

Finally, you had reached the dress Shawn had picked out for you, just as you were beginning to lose all hope of finding a dress. The moment you slipped it on you knew it felt different than the others: it fit you perfectly with a plunging neckline that showed just enough, the fabric wrapped along the middle to the bottom to accentuate your waist, your curves were shown in a way that it was flattering, but not too overwhelming, and the maroon color complimented your skin beautifully. You couldn't lie, Shawn had somehow managed to find the perfect dress for you. “Ok, you can turn around now.” 

He slowly uncovered his eyes and faced his body towards you, his mouth immediately going dry at the sight of you. The combination of your body in the dress and the gorgeous smile on your face was kryptonite for him and he couldn’t help but wish even harder that he was the one who was lucky enough to be your date for the ball. He motioned you towards him, rubbing his fingers along the fabric of the dress in a way that sent your stomach flipping. “This the one?” he asked, looking up at you with bright doe eyes. You nodded slowly, watching him tug his bottom lip between his teeth. “Grant is very lucky to have you as his date, honey.”

You paused. The thought of Grant taking you to the ball instead of Shawn had completely escaped your mind and in that moment you regretted ever agreeing to changing your date this year. “Yeah, um, right, I hope he likes it.”

“If he has a brain in that head of his then there’s no doubt he’s going to be blown away by you.” He gave a gentle smile your way before tucking a stray piece of hair behind your ear and tapping your hip lightly, “Now go and get changed so we can go cash out.”

You nodded your head as he turned back around, silently smacking yourself in the face for the sudden butterflies that were forming in your stomach. Since when did he have such an effect on you? And why was he doing it so easily?

The moment you got to the cash register, he immediately pushed you out of the way and gave his credit card to the cashier before you could even pull out your wallet. “Shawn, why did you pay for that? I was going to…”

“Calm down, honey,” he laughed at your outburst as he opened the car door for you, “Think of it as an apology gift for me not hanging out with you as much as I usually do this week.”

“But…”

“No buts, it’s already done.” The car engine roared to life and all you could think about while you sat in the passenger seat of his car was how you were going to be wearing a dress that not only did Shawn pick out, but also bought for you while you had to act like you weren’t constantly thinking about him as you stood next to Grant the whole night. Shawn had made sure that you were completely and utterly screwed.

____________________

“Are you almost done?” you heard Shawn’s impatient call from your bedroom. You were living in a larger suite with a bunch of other girls so you were lucky enough to have your own bathroom attached to your room. Shawn had gotten ready in the bathroom before you but you refused to look at him until you were finished as well, not wanting to ruin the surprise. So he sat out there waiting for you while you fixed your hair and makeup relentlessly, watching the time pass by ever so slowly.

“Give me one more second!” you called out to him, adjusting one final strand of hair. You checked your makeup one last time before opening the door, revealing yourself to a Shawn who was sat perched on the end of the bed, phone in hand. 

He looked up at the sound of the door opening, his mouth dropping open ever so slightly, “Damn, you look just perfect.” 

You willed the heat in your cheeks to go away, “Thank you. You don’t look half as bad yourself. Quite dashing if I say so.” It was true, he was wearing a simple black button up with black dress pants that fit to his thighs perfectly as he stood up in front of you. His outfit shouldn’t have looked as attractive to you as it did, maybe it was something about the way he had the top few buttons open to reveal the small amount of chest hair he was currently sporting or the way his hair was styled to perfection with your favorite curl hanging out in front, but your heart couldn’t stop fluttering at the sight of him. And then it dropped the moment you realized that you weren’t the girl that got to walk hand in hand with him that night.

“Before we go I have something for you.” Shawn turned towards his bag where he pulled out one single rose for you, “I know I’m not your date this year, but it felt wrong to break tradition. Besides, needed to make sure a beautiful girl like you got a flower in case Grant dropped the ball.”

You were suddenly extremely aware of how close he was to you, his nose almost touching yours. His eyes flickered to your lips for a brief moment, so fast that you couldn’t even tell by the way you were so focused on his breath hitting your lips. “Thank you,” you whispered, “You shouldn’t have.”

“I definitely should have.” His eyes went to your lips once again, this time letting them linger slightly longer so you got the hint. Your hands were trapped holding the rose against his chest as his hands ghosted over your hips, fingertips teasing the fabric of your dress. Shawn tilted his head ever so slowly, nudging your nose with his until your lips parted with a breath.

The sound of your phone ringing broke the two of you apart in a hurry as though you were both afraid of being caught. You scrambled away from him, heading to your dresser to grab a hold of your phone, Grant’s name lighting up the screen making the guilt in your stomach grow. “Hey, Grant, what’s up?”

“Hey are you going to be here soon?” his voice filled your ear.

“Yeah, I’m leaving right now.”

“Perfect, can’t wait to see you.”

“Can’t wait to see you either,” your voice came out soft before you ended the call, bringing your phone down slowly to face Shawn. He had the same conflicted look in his eyes that you couldn’t decipher as he held eye contact with you. 

He let out a deep sigh, picking up his bag that was on the floor, “We should probably go.”

“You’re right,” you agreed, but made no move to head towards the door.

Shawn came over to you, placing his hands in his pockets. “Grant’s waiting for you.” You nodded your head. “Jessica’s waiting for me.” You nodded once again. He let out another sigh, putting a soft hand on your cheek and a kiss to your hair, “We need to go.” You watched as he walked towards the door, looking back at you once he reached the doorway, and you had no choice but to follow suit.

____________________

Oh my god, I almost kissed Shawn. We almost kissed and we would’ve kissed if Grant hadn’t called me. Oh my god Grant. Why didn’t I think of Grant when I was with Shawn? Shawn’s my best friend, I can’t like him like that. Does he like me like that? Can you imagine if he liked me like that? 

“We’re here.” You looked over at Shawn who hadn’t uttered a single word to you the entire way here and was already proceeding to get out of the car without you. The door slammed shut and you winced, not understanding why he was so angry about what happened. Did he really want to kiss you that bad? Your heart couldn’t help but beat faster at the thought of him wanting to kiss you, but you willed it away, instead choosing to clamer out of the car after Shawn and attempt to focus your thoughts on Grant who was without a doubt waiting behind that door for you. 

“Shawn, wait up!” you called out as you ran after him, almost catching up to him as he reached the top of the steps before your heel got caught on the step and sent you tumbling forward. The second a squeal left your lips, Shawn’s arms were already around you, effectively saving you from a face plant on the concrete. You looked at him breathlessly, trying to compose yourself after what felt like a near death experience, “Thank you.”

“Are you alright?” he asked, concern evident in his eyes. Even when he was combating his emotions he still cared so deeply about you.

“Yeah I’m fine. I wouldn’t be if it wasn’t for you though…”

“Y/n, there you are!” Grant opened the door, with a wide grin on his face, but upon noticing the position you and Shawn were in, his brows furrowed, “Are you two ok?”

“What?” you looked between the two of you, “Oh, we’re perfect. Just took a little tumble up the stairs is all.” Shawn pulled you up with an arm around your waist until you were stable on your feet before immediately retracting as though you were made of fire. 

“Thanks for saving her man,” Grant told him, clapping his shoulder as he snaked an arm around your waist, “Jessica’s been asking about you in there by the way. Told her you’d find her when you got here.”

“Right, thanks.” Shawn awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck before excusing himself to push past the two of you into the house.

Grant leaned in closer to you as you both watched Shawn leave, “Is he alright?”

“Yeah, I wouldn’t worry about him,” you reassured him, “Why don’t we get something to drink?”

“Sounds perfect.” Grant took your hand softly into his, leaving a light kiss to your cheek and leading you into the noisy house.

____________________

It had been hours since you arrived at the loud, people filled house. You had barely seen Shawn the whole night; you thought you might have seen him and Jessica making out in a corner at one point, but the multi-color lights in the house didn’t exactly make picking people out of the crowd as easy as it usually was. You had spent the entire night with Grant attached to your hip, whether it was while you were getting a drink, talking to friends, or dancing, he was always right by your side. His hands were currently on your hips, chest pressed to your back and peppering gentle kisses to your exposed neck as you swayed in rhythm to the beat of the song blaring through the speakers. The two of you hadn’t kissed yet, but with the way the drinks were affecting you, you doubt that statement would stay true for long. You were nursing your almost empty drink, the description of the contents long forgotten, all you knew was that your body had a nice tingly sensation running through it and your head was feeling just foggy enough that you knew exactly what you were doing, but you were willing to make some decisions you definitely wouldn’t make sober. Grant pressed a longer kiss to the back of your ear before whispering into it, “Stay here. I’m just going to run to the bathroom.” 

You nodded your head in his direction, taking the time to look around at the people around you. After waiting a few minutes for his return, you became bored and took it upon yourself to get yourself a new drink. You had been here enough that even drunk you knew your way to the kitchen so you easily maneuvered through the clusters of couples until you pushed open one of the entrances to the kitchen. No matter how much you desperately wished you couldn’t recognize the brown haired boy that was in there with you, there was no amount of alcohol that could make you forget his defining features. At the sound of the door closing, his head perked up to look at you and you became painfully aware of how the two of you were the only ones in there as you stared into his honey colored eyes. “Hey,” you breathed out, stepping closer until you were practically shoulder to shoulder with him. 

“Hey,” he bumped your shoulder with his, “Long time no see.”

The loopy smile he gave you told you that he was also feeling the alcohol, but probably only as much as you; the man knew how to hold his drinks. “Whatcha doing in here?”

“Told Jessica I’d get the both of us something more to drink,” he motioned to the two cups in front of him, “What about you? Where’s Grant?”

“Bathroom,” you replied, leaning back onto the counter, “I got bored waiting for him out there.” 

You lifted up Shawn’s hand that was resting next to you and began tracing the pattern on his fingertips. “What are you doing, love?” he laughed, the pet name slipping out as they usually did when he had some alcohol in his system.

“Playing with your hand.” You locked hands with him while he moved in front of you to make it all the more easier for you to continue your task. His large body trapped you against the counter, but you hardly noticed until his breath fanning over your face tore your attention away from his hand. “You’re very handsome you know,” you smiled, releasing his hand to run your finger over the light scar on his face, “So pretty.”

He let out a breathy laugh as he moved his now free hand to the counter to fully lock you in between his body, “That’s funny coming from someone who looks like those goddesses we used to learn about in school.”

“I don’t look like a goddess…” your voice trailed off, too occupied with outlining the features of his face.

“Yeah you do. Look like the prettiest one...what was her name again?” He smirked down at you, knowing Greek mythology used to be one of your favorite topics in school.

“Aphrodite?”

“Mhm, that’s the one. Swear you’re a real life Aphrodite.” He moved in closer to you, brown eyes boring into you and forcing your gaze back into them. He heard your breath catch in your throat as his nose touched yours, “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing...you’re just close is all.”

“I am close,” he whispered, biting his lip when he felt the hand you had on his jaw move to his neck. “Y/n?”

“Yeah?”

“What would you do if I kiss you right now?”

Your wide eyes batted up at him innocently from where he was towering over you, your heart absolutely racing, “I’d kiss you back.” 

And with that his lips connected to yours feverishly, his body pressing to yours harder. His lips were soft and you could taste the alcohol from whatever drink he had been sipping on before that made him intoxicating. He licked tentatively over your bottom lip, practically groaning into your mouth when you immediately opened up for him. You tasted so sweet to him, so sweet that he swore he could easily become addicted to your taste. He pulled your bottom lip between his teeth, eliciting a soft moan from you that made his grip on the counter tighten and his hips push against yours harder. You could feel a bulge pressing against your lower stomach and you couldn’t help letting out another moan that Shawn eagerly swallowed into a kiss. Pulling him closer to you by his hair, he took that as a sign to thread his right hand through the base of your hair, the other hand reaching down to harshly pull your leg around his hip. Your hips bucked against his as his tongue fought yours for dominance that you easily gave him. 

Just as his hand was about to run up your thigh, the door to the kitchen burst open and Shawn swiftly moved completely away from you and back in front of the drinks he had originally come in for. You almost whined at the sudden lack of content, but the look of shock on the stranger’s face shut you up. It only took one look at your wide eyes and swollen lips and the sudden wrinkles in Shawn’s shirt for them to hastily exit the room with an apology spilling from their lips. 

The second they were gone you made your way back to Shawn, who was breathing heavily as he stared at the counter. You placed your hand on his chin, bringing his face back to you. Using your thumb to swipe at a rogue smudge of lipstick that had transferred onto him, you looked at him carefully, swallowing thickly when he placed a gentle kiss to the pad of your finger. You looked him in the eyes for the first time since your heated moment and while you could only see what you believed to be lust in his eyes, he saw yours change from lust to fear and to what finally made his heart drop: regret. “Oh my god,” you breathed out, successfully dodging Shawn’s attempt to grab your arm.

“Y/n wait!”

“I’m sorry, Shawn.”

“Please!” was the last thing you heard before you shut the door to the kitchen and rushed through the crowd of people. Your breathing was becoming erratic the deeper into your thoughts you got until you felt you were on the verge of a panic attack with no one to save you.

“There you are,” Grant sighed relieved, causing you to jump when his hand wrapped around your arm, “I’ve been looking for you everywhere.” 

“Sorry, I was bumped around in the crowd and got lost trying to find you again,” you lied, trying to avoid his eyes.

“That’s alright, I’m just glad you’re here,” he smiled at you, his brows furrowing while his hand came up to your lips, “Hold on your lipstick is a little smudged.”

Your eyes grew ten times wider, “Um, I think I must have just messed it up while I was drinking or something.”

“Ok, do you want to go dance again?”

“Yeah, uh, that sounds great…” your eyes met a frantic Shawn’s as he searched for you in the crowd, “You know what, I actually think I’m going to go home.”

“What?” Grant asked, confused as he followed you through the people.

“I just don’t feel good all of a sudden, it has nothing to do with you I swear. You’re amazing, I just need to go.” 

“Stay here overnight, don’t go home.”

“Grant, I don’t feel well.”

“I know, I don’t want that. I mean you’re gorgeous and everything, but if you’re not feeling well then obviously not. It’s just, I’m not in the right mindset to drive, it’s frigid out there, and a drunk girl all alone in an uber sounds like a horrible idea. So why don’t you just stay? I’ll sleep on the floor so you can sleep in my bed.”

“I don’t know…”

“Please, I just want you to be safe.” 

Your eyes lingered over to wear Shawn was still watching you, this time with Jessica in front of him, obviously trying to get his attention onto her. “You know what...sure. I’ll stay.”

A bright smile formed on Grant’s face, “Perfect, let’s get you all settled then.” He grabbed your hand and led you up the stairs toward his room, Shawn’s eyes following you with a heavy heart.

____________________

The next morning you bumped into Shawn in the hallway as you were exiting Grant’s room wearing his clothes he had let you borrow to sleep in for the night. Neither of you said a word as you silently made your way past him and down the stairs towards Grant’s car while Grant came strolling out of his room with his classic smile on his face, having no clue how heart broken Shawn felt when he gave him a friendly pat on the shoulder.

____________________

It had been a week since you last spoke to Shawn. Not a single message or interaction between the two of you. You didn’t know what you would say if you even had approached him, but you hadn’t gotten the chance to find out. Having to pack up your dorm for the semester gave you an excuse for not talking and a way to busy yourself to get your mind off of him. But no matter what you did Shawn Mendes was still hanging in the back of your mind, taunting you with replays of different moments with him over and over again. You were lucky that this time you hadn’t been planning on driving back home with him so you didn’t have to face him on the hours long drive back, though you knew that didn’t mean you wouldn’t be seeing him at some point upon your arrival. All these thoughts were swimming through your head as you pulled into your parent’s driveway, immediately being met with a swarm of greetings from your family. You seemed to have arrived before Shawn, which you felt incredibly fortunate for as you were ushered into the house. 

You didn’t see Shawn the whole first week you were there either, no matter how much your heart ached for him. You found yourself more often than not wondering what he was doing just next door and if he was thinking about you too or if you had already become something unattainable and therefore not worth his time. Even though you knew he wasn’t that type of person, the little devil on your shoulder kept telling you that he wanted nothing to do with you anymore.

Christmas Eve you were tucked into your bed, soft breaths coming from your mouth. The snow was coming down in light, fluffy flakes, just enough that it was the pretty white Christmas you always loved without the terrible snow storm you couldn’t stand. The first knock on your window sounded like the wind, but the second one was unmistakable, abruptly pulling you from your sleep and to the window. A gasp escaped your lips when you saw Shawn’s face staring back at you and you hurried to open your window for him. “Thank god,” he chuckled, “It’s freezing out there.” Shawn had been climbing up the side of your house to reach your room since you were young, so it truly should have been no surprise to you that he was scaling it in the snow.

“What do you want, Shawn?” you sighed, already making your way back into bed as he followed you, “It’s two in the morning.”

“That it is,” he agreed, “Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas,” you turned to face him, eyes only opening slightly in your sleepy haze.

He brushed a stray piece of hair out of your face, “You’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this.”

You shrugged his hand away, “Shut up.”

“It’s true,” he whispered with his hand still lingering on your face, “My little Aphrodite.”

Your eyes shot wide open, your senses suddenly wide awake, “What’d you just call me?”

“My little Aphrodite.”

You sat up next to him. “Ok, Shawn, what do you want? Why did you come here in the middle of the night on Christmas nonetheless?”

“Can’t I just say hello to my best friend?”

“You haven’t said hello to your best friend in two weeks so that’s not a good excuse.”

“Don’t say that like you haven’t been avoiding me either,” he chuckled darkly.

“I couldn’t face you, Shawn!” you choked out, eyes beginning to well up with tears as you scooted away from him, “I couldn’t, not after....not after that night.”

There was a heavy silence for a moment before Shawn spoke harshly, “Why’d you hook up with Grant that night?”

“What?”

“Why’d you hook up with Grant?”

“I didn’t hook up with Grant,” you spat out, “Why would you even think that?”

“You really expect me to believe that after I saw you not only go upstairs with him, but also leave his room the next morning wearing his clothes!”

“I do expect you to believe it because nothing happened! I wanted to leave after what happened because I didn’t want to be in the same room as you anymore and he offered me a place to stay since it was cold and I was drunk. Nothing. Happened.”

“You didn’t want to be in the same room as me? Wow.” He shook his head, leaning back against your headboard on the other side of the bed, “One second I have your leg around me, moaning in my mouth, and the next you’re leaving me without an explanation and now you’re going to tell me you couldn’t stand to be in the same room as me?!”

“You don’t understand…”

“What don’t I understand?!”

“I couldn’t be in the same room with you after I realized something…”

“What did you realize, huh? What was so groundbreaking that you couldn’t even stand to see me?”

“That I was freaking in love with you!” Your mouth hung open. You had mulled over the thought of loving Shawn in the weeks you were apart, but you dismissed it every time, not believing you could have allowed yourself to fall in love with your best friend. Shawn stared at you with bated breath, his silence slowly killing you from the inside. 

Just as you were about to hide under your blanket in embarrassment, you felt something warm covering your mouth and a hand in your hair, his lips moving softly on yours. You sighed into his mouth, wrapping your arms around him eagerly to let him push you back onto your bed. He hovered on top of you, holding you close to him as he kissed you with every ounce of passion inside of him, stealing your breath away completely. His kisses were gentle, but still heavy with emotion. He parted from you to let you both catch your breaths, placing light kisses to your cheeks. “I am so in love with you, Y/n. You have no idea.” 

He left one last searing kiss on your lips before pulling away and leaning off the bed to retrieve a small wrapped box. “I got you something for Christmas.” 

You gingerly took the small box in your hand, carefully pulling off the paper to reveal a small black box. You looked up at him with curious eyes, but he only nodded his head for you to continue, placing a gentle hand on your thigh. Opening the box, a beautiful silver dove charm was revealed to you on a necklace, the light of your room catching off of it making it shine. “Shawn…” you breathed out, “it’s gorgeous.”

“It’s a dove. You know, the symbol of Aphrodite,” he smiled at you nervously, “Do you like it?”

“Of course, I love it. Put it on for me?”

Shawn pulled your back into his chest and brushed your hair out of the way to place the delicate necklace around you. Once the necklace was clasped, he left the softest of kisses to your shoulder. “There you go. Perfect for my little Aphrodite.”

[sappy-seresin]

left behind (j.m)

A/N: This imagine is based off of the song “All My Friends,” by AJ Mitchell. It doesn’t entirely relate to the song, and didn’t turn out exactly how I thought it would, but I hope that you enjoy it nonetheless. This is my first “Outer Banks,” related imagine, I’m sure it doesn’t do the show justice, but I thought I’d try because I can’t stop thinking about the show.

The sections in bold are song lyrics and flashbacks are in italics; just to clear any potential confusion.

Requests are open, as always, feel free to request anything Outer Banks related...or any of the other that fandoms I write for! 

-----------------

“I’m done, I can’t do this anymore,” JJ broke down rushing around his room to aimlessly throw his belongings into his bag.

“JJ, please calm down,” I beg, reaching out to touch him until John B’s arms wrapped around my waist, halting my movements. I look up at him in frustration, trying to force myself out of his arms. 

“Stop, he needs to do this,” he commands softly, holding me against his chest. Kie, Pope, and Sarah watch the scene in silence, the tension in the room growing thicker as we watch JJ pack his bags. 

“JJ-”

“Don’t Kie, nothing you say is going to keep me from leaving,” he barks, glaring at her. His whole body trembling with anger due to argument that he had with his dad moments earlier. “I’m done.” 

My heart drops at the sight of him; knowing full well that even I won’t be able to convince him to stay. 

An hour later we stand on the dock watching hundreds of people board the ferry. Everyone stands in silence anticipating having to say goodbye, but seemingly afraid of the moment that we’d be forced to do so. 

JJ’s hand slides into mine tightly gripping onto my fingers. I close my eyes, trying to stay calm and support his decision of leaving the island, even though I want to beg him to stay. 

“It’s time,” Pope sighs, breaking the silence as we all share sad glances.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” I whisper to JJ, pulling him into my arms. “I’ll talk to my parents, you know that they’ll let you stay with us. Please, just don’t leave me here.”

“I can’t move in with you,” he states, his words slightly muffled by my hair. “I have to go, and I need you to support this decision.”

“Then let me come with you,” I insist, frowning when he pulls himself from my grasp so that he can look at me. “We promised that we’d never leave each other-”

“We were four years old,” he sighs, shaking his head. “I love you but this is something I need to do on my own, okay?” I simply nod in response; not trusting my voice. He pulls me back into his arms one last time, whispering a “thank you” before he moved to say his goodbyes to everyone else. I stand to the side, looking anywhere but at my friends as each of them had their moment with him. 

Kie and Sarah joined me, giving me sympathetic looks before pulling me into side hugs so that we could stand together. I lay my head on Sarah’s shoulder, watching John B pull JJ into his arms one last time.

“Take care of yourself, JJ,” he stated as they pulled away from each other.

“You know I will,” he winked, clearly trying to lighten the mood and take our attention away from the tears threatening to spill from his eyes. He takes a moment to salute at us, his eyes meeting mine one last time before he spun around to board the ferry without looking back.

-----------------

“Why can’t I just hide in my room,” I huff exasperatedly flopping on my bed backwards tired of hearing my mom ramble about needing to get back to a normal routine.

“Listen to me, it’s been nearly a month. I know how deeply you care for him, but this has got to stop,” she states walking out of my closet empty handed. “You’ve never liked this house, and now it seems that all you want to do is spend your time here. As much as I love having you around, I’m worried.”

“Mom,” I groan, shifting to face her. “You don’t have to worry. I’m perfectly fine.” 

“I’m your mother. As much as you think you can lie to me, you can’t. So don’t start,” she warns, raising her eyebrows as she sat on the bed next to me. I sigh, shoulders slumping in defeat, as the front I attempted to put on slowly vanished. “Love is strong, especially when you’re young. Sadly, when you sign up for love you also sign up for potential heartbreak. The fact that you’re hurting so deeply just shows that it was real.” I listen intently, tears springing into my eyes at her words. 

“But I didn’t sign up for it, mom. He’s my best friend, not my boyfriend,” I huff, as if trying to deny what I already know is true.

“You and I know full well that you don’t have to be dating someone to be in love,” she replies, sending me a gentle smile. “Your relationship with JJ is a prime example of that. You’ve been in love with that boy for years and, from what I’ve seen, he is just as in love with you.”

“I know that you’re mourning what you lost, but you can’t stop living because of this,” she continues, tucking hair behind my ear, caressing my cheek. Her thumb wiping away the single tear escaping my eye. “You have friends that love you; who want to be able to walk through this with you and quite frankly, I’m running out of excuses as to why they can’t come see you.” A quiet laugh falls from my lips between quiet sniffles, still unable to muster up any words. 

“I know you feel alone, because you love him, but your friends are working through letting go of JJ too. You weren’t the only one the boy left behind when he left the island. He was their best friend too,” her fingers tenderly brush through my tangled hair, knowing how that it’s always helped me relax. “With that being said, I think you would start feeling a lot better if you stopped pushing them away, don’t you?” 

“I guess,” I sniffle, not enjoying the fact that she’s right. 

“Great, because I told them to pick you up on the dock in an hour,” she smiles brightly, scrunching up her face as she awaits my response.

“Mom,” I exclaim, shooting up from my bed. “Why would you do that? I haven’t showered in a week! There’s so much that needs to be done!” 

 She laughs from her spot on the bed, watching me haphazardly pull clothes out of my closet. I hurry towards the bathroom with a heap of clothes in my arms, pausing to drop everything on the bed to wrap her in a hug. “Thank you.”

------

Crowded but a lonely place

Sittin’ at a table full of double dates

And everywhere I go, I wanna see your face

I take a sip from the solo cup in my cold hands, shuddering due to the breeze that passed by. My attention on John B and Sarah seated across from me, laughing at something Pope had said. The boneyard buzzing with multiple groups of people due to the kegger currently taking place on the beach.

 I zone out from the conversation to study my surroundings. A familiar emptiness settling in as I mindlessly scan the crowd in search of JJ even though I know he isn’t here. Scanning my surroundings in search of him has become a part of my routine; seemingly a side affect of missing him. 

My eyes trail over my friends, each looking exceptionally light, carelessly engrossed in their conversation. Two months ago, I would have been happy at the sight but something is missing. Someone is missing and I’ve caught myself feeling completely alone in moments like this one. JJ’s arm should be carelessly draped over my shoulders but instead there’s an empty spot next to me, and a deep longing that never seems to go away. Our group has been perfectly paired up ever since Sarah and John B got together, Pope and Kiara following soon after, but now I’m always left feeling like a fifth wheel on a double date. 

“Hey,” Kie’s voice cals, pulling my attention back to my friends. The small fire in front of us casts shadows on each of them as I’m met with Kie’s concerned face. “You good?” Her question catches me off guard and forces me to shift uncomfortably in lawn chair under everyone’s gaze. 

“Um, yeah, I’m fine. I guess that it’s kind of hard to enjoy parties anymore,” I shrug, trying to muster up a reassuring smile. “They’re not the same without JJ.” Her concerned expression drops into one of sympathy and I immediately regret saying anything. John B whispers something to Sarah, pressing a soft kiss against her temple, before he moves to take the empty seat next to me. He wordlessly slings his arm over my shoulders and pulls me into him, resting his chin on my head.

“I miss him too,” he whispers looking down at me.

“I should’ve gone with him,” I state, John’s eyes softening at the tears filling my eyes. “When we were young, we promised each other that we wouldn’t leave unless we were together.” A tearful laugh falls from my lips at the memory. “Yet, when it actually came down to it, he didn’t seem to give leaving me behind a second thought. I should have tried harder to-”

“Stop,” John interrupts gently tilting my chin so I would look at him. “I know it hurts, but I love you too much to watch you do this to yourself.” 

His thumbs catch tears that I didn’t even realize were falling. “JJ is stubborn and hard to get through to, you know that. I know there was a part of him that wanted to take you with him but he needed to do himself. We’ve been cleaning up after him for as long as I can remember. I think he realized that he needed to be able to make his own decision without having anyone else to worry about.”

“I want to hate him,” I admit with a heavy sigh. “I feel like I want to be angry with him but I can’t.” John nods in agreement, seeming to understand what I meant. “I just feel so broken, JB. He’s my best friend.” 

“I know,” he sighs, pulling me against his chest again. “We’ll get through it together.”  ---------------- Pictures, I’m reminded 

Of good times, how we tried it

Don’t know how to get you out of my mind

I don’t have it in me to deny it

Sitting cross-legged on the floor of the guest bedroom at the chateau, I shuffle through the old photo album I’d found. My lips curve into a smile when I come across a couple of more recent photos that were haphazardly stuffed into the back of the tethered book. They were taken on a cheap disposable camera that JJ bought me after he overheard me talking to Kiara about how much I’d been wanting to buy one.

It was a beautiful day so we’d packed the HMS Pogue up with fishing supplies and snacks having opted to spend the day on the water. 

The sun had just started going down, each of us sun kissed and slightly tipsy as we waited for the sunset. I was curled up on the front of the boat with JJ, clad in his t-shirt with a blanket strewn across our laps. My back rested against his front, his chest vibrating with soft laughter as John B clambered back into the boat, soaking wet, after he’d lost his balance while wrestling with Pope. John B let out a string of threats as we all laughed at him, mostly due to the look on his face when he realized he was going down. 

I smiled at the way that JJ hugged me closer to him when our laughter died down. He adjusted me in his lap, his arms still wrapped tightly around my torso as I focused on the sunset ahead of us. I was so focused on the view that I didn’t notice Kie approaching us with my camera in her hands. We’d all taken turns taking photos on it because I was antsy to get them developed to see how they would turn out. 

JJ, also oblivious to Kie’s presence, pressed a gentle kiss to the crown of my head right as the flash of the camera went off causing both of us to jump slightly.

“My eyes,” JJ exclaims, a laugh falling my lips when his hands suddenly moved in front of my eyes as if he was going to protect them from another flash. I heard the camera click again causing JJ to protest. “Kie, I’m going blind here.”

JJ’s hands fell from my eyes; returning to their original spot on my waist. Kie stood in front of us lifting my camera again to taunt him. My head fell back against JJ’s chest, loud loud laughs falling from my lips, as JJ shouted threats at Kie. Pope and John B had since joined in on the fun, egging Kie on. JJ halted his movements, an endearing smile on his face as he looked down at me, watching me laugh.

“Now would be a good time to take a picture, Kie,” John whispered, prompting her to catch the sweet moment.

I shake my head; fingers delicately brushing over the pictures.

“I thought you’d be hiding in here,” John’s voice rang, pulling me out of my trance. I look up at him from my position on the floor. His arms cross against his chest, a lazy smile on his lips, as he leaned against the door frame.

“Yeah, sorry,” I blush, watching him stalk over to where I’m seated.

“I remember that day,” he smiles, taking one of the pictures from my hands. “Times we much simpler then.” I nod in agreement; wordlessly pushing a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

“I thought he was going to kiss me,” I admit with a small laugh.

“Me too. I’m convinced that he would have if Kie hadn’t ruined the mood,” John replies, moving to flip through the photo album on the floor.

“Actually, the mood wouldn’t have been ruined if you hadn’t encouraged her to take the picture. So I think you’re the one to blame,” I joke, shoving his shoulder.

“That may be true, but at least we captured the moment and you can keep it forever.” He throws his hands up in surrender and gestures to the picture before returning his attention to the photo album.

“He loves you a lot. You know that right?” John asks, breaking the comfortable silence. “God, he always looked at you like that.” John’s voice broke with a lighthearted laugh.

“He did, didn’t he?” I whisper, relishing in the memories of how JJ always looked at me as if I was all that mattered. “I can’t stop thinking about him, John B. I mean, he’s been gone for weeks and hasn’t even bothered to call. Doesn’t he realize that we’re worried about him? I can’t walk into a room without looking for him or go to sleep without having nightmares about him being alone.”

“Hey, it’s JJ we’re talking about. He’ll come around eventually. I miss him like hell, but I know that he needed to go.”John assured pulling the pictures out of my hands so that I would look at him. His hand came up to caress my cheek, just like JJ had done since we were young. “I also know that he’d hate it if he knew how much this is hurting you.” 

“I just wish he’d call. I hate missing him.” 

“I know,” he sighs, pulling me into a loose hug. We stayed like that for a long time, John holding me against his chest as he quietly shared stories about his dad. We only moved when my head began lulling to the side, fighting to keep my eyes open. John wordlessly stood up, sticking his hand out for me to grab. “I’ll tell your mom that you’re staying over again.”

“Thank you,” I yawn, giving him a quick hug before he exited the room. I turn around, pulling on one of the sweatshirts JJ always left out for me to wear. It doesn’t smell like him anymore, but still brings me the same sense of comfort that it always has. 

Spending the night at the chateau is the only way I seem to be able to get a decent nights sleep nowadays. Something about staying in the guest room, that JJ practically claimed as his own, seemed to cure my tendency to lie awake at night worrying about him. I curl under the covers feeling myself relax almost immediately as sleep welcomed me.  --------------------

Cause everybody, everybody knows something I don’t

Where are they? I think to myself, eyebrows furrowing together when I notice that the Twinkie isn’t parked in front of John B’s house. I stalk up the driveway and let myself into the house. 

“Hello,” I call, only to be met with silence. I pull my phone out of my pocket, quickly dialing Kie’s number in confusion.

“Hey you,” She answers, sounding slightly nervous.

“Where are you guys? I thought we were meeting at the chateau,” I respond, ignoring her tone. 

“Pope was supposed to call you,” she sighs, only making my confusion grow.

“What do you mean, why?”

“Well, we all kind of got called into work last minute. The boys are helping Heyward set up for midsummer’s and I have to cover for a waitress that didn’t come in,” she explains, and I hear hushed whispers on the other line. 

“Why do you sound so weird? What’s wrong?” I ask, noticing the weird strain in her voice. 

“Weird? I don’t sound weird. Everything’s fine,” she dismissed. The whispers on her end of the phone only growing louder. I can’t make out what’s being said but I’m certain that John B was among the people whispering. 

“Kie, what is going on? Are the boys th-”

“Hey, I’m sorry I have to go. Sorry for bailing on the plans last minute, but it’s urgent. I’ll meet you at Sarah’s to get ready for tonight,” she quickly rushes before hanging up the phone. 

I slide my phone into my pocket with a frown, deciding to walk to Sarah’s now seeing as everyone else seems to be busy. I kick at loose rocks on the ground; thinking back to my conversation with Kie. They’re definitely hiding something. I furrow my eyebrows, feeling annoyed due to being in the dark about what was going on. 

I can’t seem to settle down,

Cause I’m waiting on you to come around

Midsummers has been going on for nearly an hour, and I’ve been on edge the whole time. This year was the first year that all of the Pogues, excluding JJ, are attending the party. Pope being here to help Heyward prepare food while John B is Sarah’s plus one. 

I’ve been eyeing my friends closely all night, noticing multiple moments of hushed whispers whenever I came back around. I’ve only grown more and more frustrated at their lack of explanation as to why they are acting so suspicious. 

“Okay, I don’t know what the hell is going on, but I’m over it. If someone doesn’t give me answers right now, I’m leaving,” I huff, walking over to my friend group, huddled by the food tables away from everyone else. They turn around in surprise, my tone clearly catching them off guard. I cross my arms, patiently waiting for someone to speak while they share a glance. Everyone’s eyes landing on John B. Whose eyes were trained on something behind me, a slight smile adorning his face.

“Leaving so soon? But the party just got here,” a familiar voice states behind me causing goosebumps to rise on my skin; my breath catching in my throat. My heart pounds against my rib cage as I turn around in shock, a loud gasp leaving my lips at the sight of the blonde boy standing in front of me with his hands in his pockets. 

“JJ,” I choke out, hands shooting to my mouth in disbelief. His figure blurs with the tears filling my eyes. I wordlessly watch him step closer to me, seemingly frozen in place at the sight in front of me.

“It’s me,” he whispers. “I’m right here.” All of my emotions hit me the moment his hands tenderly cup my face, thumbs brushing away the shocked tears. I throw my arms around him, trying not to make too much of a scene as quiet sobs fall from my shaking frame. A wave of peace rolls over my body at the realization that JJ is okay and is safely tucked in my arms.

The rest of the Pogues come around us, wrapping us in the middle of an emotional group hug. When the hug breaks, I cling to JJ for a few more seconds, not entirely convinced that he’s actually in front of me. His lips press a gentle kiss on my forehead, quietly assuring me that he was there. 

“Don’t leave me again,” I demand, pulling myself away from his grip. “My heart can’t handle it.”

“I promise, I’m here for good,” he laughs, pulling me into one more hug before we return to reality. We spend the rest of the party catching up and enjoying each others company. For the first time in weeks, things feel okay. 

---------------------

And everybody lookin’ like a honeymoon

But all that I have been looking for is me and you

Glancing around John B’s living room, a content smile forms on my face. I take a mental snapshot of the moment; relishing in how good it feels to be together again. Our bodies clad in pajamas all squished together on the small pullout couch. We shared stories for hours, everyone falling asleep one by one until me and JJ were the only two left awake.

“Do you want to go to the guest room? As much as I love these guys, I don’t really want to wake up groping any of them,” he whispered, pausing when Pope stirred in his sleep. I smile, pressing my finger to my lips to signal him to be quiet as I slowly crawl out of bed, trying not to wake any of them up. JJ follows soon after, successfully making it off of the mattress without disturbing anyone. He nods toward the hallway, lacing his fingers with mine before pulling me towards the room. 

We wordlessly crawl under the covers and settle into a comfortable silence, noticing the sun beginning to peak through the blinds. JJ wraps his arms around me, pulling me into his chest with a content sigh. 

“I’ve missed this,” I murmur, breaking the peaceful silence. JJ hums in agreement, pressing a chaste kiss on my forehead mumbling a soft, “me too,” against my skin. My heart swells at the feeling, a sudden wave of confidence spreading through my body forcing me to sit up in the bed abruptly, pulling myself out of his grasp.

“What’s wrong,” he asks, mirroring my movements as he shifts to face me. I instinctively grab his hand; fingers tracing the lines on his palms to keep myself from looking at him.

“I need to tell you something,” I state after a few moments of silence, hesitantly tearing my gaze away from our hands. I’m met with a concerned expression, his hand moving to push my hair out of my face.

“What is it?” I sigh at his question, nerves beginning to settle in as I stare at him. You have to tell him, I think to myself, there’s really no going back at this point. 

“JJ I-” I pause, pressing my lips together in a thin line. The fear of telling him how I feel eating away at me, while he patiently waits for me to continue. 

“You can tell me,” he smiles, a slight glimmer in his eyes.

“The last three months have been absolute hell,” I admit, watching his supportive expression drop at my words. “I was forced to watch everyone else continue on with their lives while I was just stuck.”

He opens his mouth to say something but I shake my head, silently beginning him to let me continue. “You’ve been this constant thought on my mind. It’s kind of funny actually, it seems that you constantly demanded my attention even when you weren’t here,” I laugh lightheartedly, wiping away the tears that escaped my eyes. 

“Anyway, your being gone gave me a lot of time to think and I’ve realized that I can’t keep pretending that I don’t feel a certain way about you,” JJ’s eyes urge for me to continue as his hand gently squeezes my own. “JJ, I’m in love with you.” 

My words echo in my ears, heart beating rapidly in my chest, as I stare at my best friend. “I can’t keep pretending that I’m content with just being your best friend. It’s okay if you don’t feel the same way, but I have to be honest with you. All I could think about was-”

“Stop talking,” he interrupts, hands gripping my shoulders as a serious expression crosses over his face, making my heart drop. Our friendship is over. I just got him back and I’m going to lose him again. “You’re insane if you think I don’t feel the same way about you.” He moves his hands to cup my face, his eyes flickering down to my lips. “Leaving made me realize that the only time I feel safe is when I’m with you.” He hesitated for a moment before closing the gap between us with a kiss. His lips pressing against mine urgently as he pulled me into his lap. 

“God, you’re all I’ve ever wanted,” he sighs, after breaking the kiss. Our chests heaving slightly due to the previous lack of air. 

“Don’t leave me again,” I state, shoving him backwards onto the bed, watching him laugh in surprise. He flips us over, pinning me to the bed as his lips met mine again.

“I’m here for good,” he murmurs, pulling me into his arms after collapsing next to me. The beating of his heart lulled me into a peaceful sleep, resting on his promise to stay. 

[not-using-this1]

Accepting

Would you look at that finally a Yelena Belova oneshot?! Yes, I decided it was time to upload her on here again so she’s back :) 

This oneshot is actually from my wattpad (AssassinEssa) where I upload mostly all the time so if you want go check it out!

Hope you all enjoy this one ;)

Y/n tells Yelena that she likes women because she feels safer with her than her own family who she knows for a fact won't accept her. Yelena reveals her secret.

Warnings: mention of abuse, mention of torture, swearing (I think theres like only one in there)

Word Count: around 1600 words 

She couldn't hide this anymore, but she had to. Her family wouldn't accept her at all so there was really no point in telling anyone. She knew for a fact her father would practically disown her (not that he already hadn't) and her mother would just scream at her for hours and then try to set her up with multiple men. Of course she could withstand those things due to her past and the abuse she had recieved the whole of her childhood...but this could likely get her killed (her fathers ex-millitary and her mother and her don't even get along).

Thank fuck she was able to get away from her family due to a program...but that only put her through more torture until she became the woman she is today...although she is still fearful of her parents.

The only person she could trust and even feel safe around was Yelena Belova, although she is rather intimidating, the two women grew quite close during the whole program and after leaving it behind started to stay with one another.

Despite what other people thought of the blonde russian, Y/n knew her more than anyone else, including the black widow Natasha Romanoff. That's when she decided that enough was enough and practically ran over to Yelena' apartment in the rain without even calling or texting her first.

Yelena is her only home.

Y/N' POV

Standing outside of my favourite person' apartment, I hesistated for a moment. I don't understand why...I felt safe with her. Maybe it was the fact that I was scared even she might not accept me and then leave me all alone and I didn't want that.

No, she wouldn't do that to me and I know it, she may be well guarded and barely show any emotion but she's not evil, she understands me better than anyone just like I do her. Finally knocking on her door, I heard a loud crash and "der'mo" (shit). Before I could even open the door, Yelena had already opened it, a bandage wrapped around her hand. Of course I was worried but before I could even say a word..."Got back from a mission last night, cut my hand during it but it's fine."

Before I could even open my mouth to say a word, Yelena interrupted me as she let me in her apartment "Now, what's wrong Y/n?" I looked down at her hand with the bandage on it, still wanting to know if she is really okay and what happened...drive this conversation away from me and what I'm here for but I somehow don't think that will work. I sat down on her sofa, she followed after me sitting next to me, frowning at me...worried.

"You gave me a scare when you called me last night while I was still on this mission, I would've come to you but I had to finish it." She added. I wanted to say it but I was still so terrified that this could all possibly go wrong and I would lose the one person who has been through so much with me...we helped each other through so much pain, on missions emotionally and physically.

I tried to make sure I wasn't going to cry because well I rarely even cry much anymore, I honestly don't have much tears to cry because half my childhood I cried, because of how horrible it was...hence why I'm the way am I now with my ability to fight, spy skills and some very deadly moves.

I froze in place, didn't know what to say or do.

Yelena noticed immedietely that something was wrong, she grabbed my hand with her not-injured hand, I tensed up for a few seconds until I looked up at her, she gave me a small smile and that damn smile just made me calm down and ease up.

"Its okay Y/n, you're alright here." Yelena was clearly encouraging me but also reassuring me at the same time which is exactly what I needed right now. "I can tell you everything 'Lena but this...this might change things for us." I spoke truthfully. The thing is not only am I attracted to women but I'm in love with the blonde sat next to me. The woman who has stuck beside me since we were teenagers and when I was taken to the GRU (black widow program).

Yelena had never been easy to get along with at the start, she was willingly in the program and just wanted to be somebody...I understood that and then from their I guess our rocky friendship grew. But I knew back then that we loved each other...like we still do now and I want today to be the day to tell her.

Because her existence means the world to me.

"Look Y/n, I don't think what you're going to tell me would change anything. I won't hate you. I know these earlier memories of us are horrific but I remember you never giving up on being my friend during the program, you drove me absolutely crazy to the point we even fought phyiscally but at the end of the day we'd always patch each other up. What I'm saying is no matter what I could never hate or leave you not after what we've been through together." There was this soft tone in her voice, it was so calming and so soothing, she really did know how to make me feel safe, wanted and needed.

"Yeah I remember, I've mostly blocked out the bad memories to be honest but sometimes they come back up and I think that you'd react the same." Yelena nodded her head, she understood where I was coming from and that was clear. She knew that all she needed to do was be here and listen and that's exactly what shes doing.

"Do you remember when you and I got a little curious back in the dorms and we kissed?" I asked her, she looked at me and nodded knowing full well what I meant. "Yeah, I remember. It got you sent for a punishment." Yelena added, she frowned at me not looking very happy I bought up that one particular memory.

"Well that was because all my life I've known that I have liked women more than men since I was younger. In fact I've never even liked men. I have tried so hard to but I feel like I'm broken like there's something wrong with me." I finally got that part out of my system but the next part was going to be the hardest...if she accepts me.

Yelena gave me a smile and squeezed my hand ever so slightly, her thumb gently rubbing my hand in the process "You're not broken Y/n and there's nothing to be fixed. You are unique the way you are and besides no one is stopping you this is the 21st centuary my darling." Yelena spoke giving me a smile at the end, her voice soft as she let out a slight chuckle.

"I know but no one in my family would accept me and-

"They're assholes if they can't see that you're still you just because you are attracted to women, it doesn't make a difference and don't you ever put yourself down like that ever again. And besides you always have a place in my world and by my side." I cringed at that a little and laughed at how cheesy that was for the blonde because she's never like this that much.

"That's cheesy even for you Belova" I laughed, she looked at me and rolled her eyes removing her hand from mine "And I thought we were having a moment".

"Wait we were I just-" I panicked just a bit and grabbed her hand but in the process she dragged me down on top of her as she fell back on the sofa we were originally sat on. She playfully wrapped her legs around my waist and I couldn't help but whimper at the slight contact of me pushed against her. "Y/n?" Yelena asked sounding all serious for a moment.

"Do you maybe want a redo?" She asked me. I looked at her confused for a good few seconds not exactly getting the message "what do you mean by redo?"

The smirk on her face, however, told me everything. It was because of the fact I bought up that one memory. But I wasn't expecting her to say that to me. I didn't know how to exactly respond to her but even before I could even say another word she managed to flip us over on the sofa effortlessly and now she was on top of me, my legs wrapped around her waist this time.

"I really like you Y/n. Now kiss me before I change my mind." She states.

With that being said I wasted no time in pulling her down for a kiss, arms wrapped around her neck as she makes the kiss deeper, slipping her tongue in.

"How" she whispers as she pulls away but then kisses me again "would you" she adds bringing back in for another quick kiss "like to move in with me?" I was about to say 'yes' but I couldn't even say anything as she pulled me back in for another kiss.

"Yes of course."

"I'm so happy you told me that you liked women and I'm so proud of you. Because as do I." Yelena adds as she finally lets me sit up. "I'm happy to. Now can we sit and watch movies?" I asked her.

"Yes, but we won't be watching much." Yelena winked at me, I rolled my eyes at her but agreed.

I'm just so happy that I decided to finally tell her, it was worth it. She really does mean so much.

[amazingphanisnotonfire-imagines]

Sweet Pea//the other one

Request: Where the reader is Josies sister, but best friends with Sweet Pea, Toni and Fangs and is secretly in love with Sweet Pea and well Josie does not know this and you can take it from here :)

hey! so this is angstyyyy, but it was fun to write! and just a warning, there is no happy ending, sorry! have a wonderful day/night! 

part 2!

Being a McCoy, you get used to knowing everybody’s business, whether by accident or on purpose (eavesdropping on your mom’s meetings), but something’s happened recently that neither you nor the rest of the serpents can figure out. 

Sweet Pea has changed, everyone has noticed it. Over the summer it was a relatively good change. Yeah, you didn’t really see him much because he was busy doing odd jobs at all times of the day, but when you did see him, he was the happiest he’d ever been. He actually smiled, and not just at you, Toni or Fangs, but to everyone...even Reggie. He was also chatty, and he’d never been chatty in the entire time you’d known him. 

It was like a whole new side to him and another side for you to fall for. 

His smile was as bright as the sun and made you feel just as warm, and you were so glad that other people were seeing it too. Because yes, the brooding bad boy act is very attractive on him...but a smile is just wonderful.  

But then as quickly as Summer was over, it just disappeared. School started again and he went back to being the same old Sweet Pea. He didn’t talk to anyone, didn’t smile. He just sat in the background, not really engaging in anyone’s conversations. 

If anything he seemed sad. He no longer smiled when Fangs told him a stupid joke, or laughed at Toni’s sometime’s questionable outfits she was only wearing to make Cheryl happy. He stopped hanging out at the the Wyrm on Friday nights and avoided going to the weekly bonfire’s at the Quarry. 

He was just existing. And to say you were worried was an understatement. For weeks you, Toni and Fangs had tried multiple times to try and get him to talk about what was happening. There was clearly something off and given Riverdale’s history, you were all worried he’d gotten himself into something he couldn’t get out of.

But whenever you asked he just seemed to shut down. He’d become cagey and short, dismissing whatever you’d said with a shrug and an annoyed ‘i’m fine’.

You asked around the other serpents, wondering if they’d seen anything odd happening but they were all as clueless as you were. And this time your problem couldn’t be solved by hanging outside of your mom’s meetings. 

Josie had told you multiple to just stay out of whatever was going on as he clearly didn’t want you to know. But she had never liked Sweet Pea anyway so she probably just didn’t care, and just wanted you to shut up about him. 

You’d been friends with the serpents for years. Even when everyone hated them you proudly called, Sweet Pea, Toni and Fangs your best friends. You sat with them at lunch, hung out with them after school, despite what your mom, sister and friends had to say. 

“Sweet Pea never showed up today. Did you see him?” Toni asks and you shake your head, despite her not being able to see. A cold breeze blows through your hair and you look around. 

Tent city looks far creepier at night that it does at day and you’re glad you can see Sweet Pea’s not so far away. 

“Nope.” You reply and rearrange the bags in your hand. “What about Fangs? He might have seen him.” 

“I already text him. He said he hasn’t seen him either.” She replies and you let out a disappointed huff. “Do you think he’s okay?” She asks after a few seconds of silence. 

“I dunno.” You say honestly. “There’s clearly something not right. But I’ve bought all of his favourite snacks, and I’ve brought my laptop so we can watch whatever he wants and hopefully that’ll cheer him up. Or maybe just get him to talk.” You smile down at the bags you’re holding, hope blooming in your chest. 

“Hopefully.” She mumbles and you hear her move around. “Did you get Fangs’ a snack too while you were shopping?” 

“What do you think?” 

“Hopefully yes? You know what he’s like.” She replies and the two of you laugh. 

“Yes, I got his favourite. And I got your favourite too.” 

“Aww. You really are the best friend a girl could have.” She teases. 

“I know.” You shrug. “It really is an honor to be my friend, I hope you know this.” 

“Of course I do.” She replies. “We all do. Wait, don’t you have an English project due tomorrow?” 

“Yeah? And?” 

“And have you started it yet?” She asks and you roll your eyes. 

“...no.” You mumble and she tuts down the phone. “Shut up...mom.” 

“Oh, if I was your mother you’d know about it. You wouldn’t be abandoning school projects for some boy.” She scolds, making you roll your eyes again. 

“Do you really think my mom knows where I am? She may have become indifferent towards the Southside but do you really think she’d approve of her daughter hanging out with a serpent instead of doing school work.” You ask and she hums in reply. 

“Fair enough.” She laughs. “Where does she think you are?” 

“She thinks I’m with Betty, having a study date.” 

“Clever.” She nods. “Y/n?” She asks, her voice becoming suddenly serious and anxiety rises in your chest. You hate that tone, no matter who’s using it. But Toni only ever uses it whenever she wants to talk about two things, your feelings or Sweet Pea. “Do you still like Sweet Pea?” She sounds almost like she’s forcing the words out and your mouth goes dry. 

Toni and Fangs weren’t ever meant to know just how hard you’d fallen for Sweet Pea. But apparently when you’re drunk you get sad and spill your guts about every feeling you’ve ever had for anyone. 

You told Fangs how you thought he was cute when you first met and how you thought Toni was very pretty when you first met her. By the next morning the could recite the names of all your crushes dating back to kindergarten and not even you knew their names, but apparently when you’re drunk you do. 

It ended in Toni and Fangs taking you back to hers and you telling them that you were in love with Sweet Pea before passing out on her bathroom floor. The next morning while you were hungover and dying, they made you have the most painful interaction you’d ever had with anybody ever. 

But through your liquified brain you told them the truth. 

Yes you did like Sweet Pea, you probably even loved him. 

Now there’s no probably about it. You know you love him. 

A part of you thinks you always have but you were just too afraid of what people would say. You’d never be allowed to date a serpent, especially because of who you were and what your family name meant to this town. You’d be the outcast, you already were because of the people you were friends with. 

Now though, the residents of Riverdale have been dragged to the 21st century and very slowly, they’re realizing that it doesn’t really matter what side of the town you’re from. 

Although you’re still not sure your mom would be very pleased if you came home and introduced Sweet Pea as your boyfriend...not that that would happen anytime soon anyway. 

“I er. Yeah.” You stutter.

“Okay.” She says awkwardly and both of you go quiet, not really sure what to say next. “I-” 

“Shhh.” You cut her off, the sound of twigs crunching makes you pause and look up. Your eyebrows furrow as you watch your sister walk towards Sweet Pea’s trailer. 

“Y/n? Are you okay?” Toni asks, panic rising in her voice with each word. 

“Yeah. I’ll er. I’ll call you back later.” You say, not taking your eyes away from Josie. You can hear Toni asking what’s wrong but you don’t answer, instead you hang up and can already hear the lecture you’re going to get from her the next time you see her. 

“Hey, Sweet Pea.” She smiles and disappears into the tent. You pick up your pace until you’re stood outside. You’re about to go in but something in you tells you to wait and see what happens. “Hope you don’t mind me dropping by like this?” 

“Always happy to see you, Josie.” Sweet Pea replies and you scrunch your face up in confusion. Since when has Sweet Pea and Josie ever hung out? They usually leave the room as soon as the other one turns up, even after the feud between the North and the Southside. 

You always assumed its just because they simply didn’t get along, that was fine. Not everyone is going to like each other, but something about this feels odd, you just can’t quite put your finger on it. “Especially if this is a...” He trails off, but there’s a playfulness in his tone that you thought was only reserved for you. You heart sinks and you look at the the brown leaves wet and rotting on the floor. 

“A booty call?” Josie replies and your eyes widen.

“Wouldn’t be the first one we’ve had since our Summer fling ended.” He laughs and the realisation sinks in. You’ve been so stupid. For years you’ve fawned over and followed Sweet Pea, constantly trying to cheer him up or make him laugh and get him to see the real you. 

And he has, he’s been looking at it all those years, he just didn’t like it. He preferred Josie instead. Smarter, prettier Josie who’s way more popular and talented and just better than you at everything, including liking Sweet Pea it seems. Tears prick at your eyes and you sniffle, wanting nothing more than to run away and hide, but you can’t. Your feet are stuck, despite the rest of your body screaming at you to run.

Run as far away from them as possible. Run until no one can find you. Just run.  

“Well, it’s not.” She says awkwardly. “Um...I don’t know if you’ve heard, but my mom is getting married, to Kevin’s dad. And I wanted to know if you would be my date to the wedding.”

“As your boyfriend?” He asks hopefully. 

“Does it have to be so official?” 

“Look, Josie...I like you. And I’d be all in with you in a second, but...but you sliding into my life whenever you don’t wanna be alone. I’m not built that way. Maybe that makes me needy, but I just, I gotta get off this merry-go-round with you.” He sighs and tears run down your cheeks. 

“Okay.” She agrees. “You are still invited to the wedding though...if you’d like to come.” 

“Yeah, I er. Y/n already invited me anyway.” He shrugs and anger fills your chest. You know you probably shouldn’t, but you just see red and the next thing you know you’re storming through the door, much to the surprise of them both. 

“Yeah I did.” You seethe.

“Y/n?” Josie asks, her eyes wide as she scrambles to think of an excuse. “I was jus-” 

“What are you doing here?” Sweet Pea jumps up from his bed and stands in front of you. 

“I came here to cheer you up, you ass.” You sob and throw the bags to the floor. “I brought all you’re favourite things and I thought we could hang out because you’ve been so sad recently and nobody knows why and we were all so worried about you. But now I do. It’s because of her. And you guys didn’t even tell me. Do you know how worried I’ve been about you?” 

“Sorry?” He asks and you shake your head at him, sending him a glare he’s only ever seen a handful of times and never directed at him.  

“All those jobs you said you were doing over the summer. It was just a cover wasn’t it?” You cry and he looks over at Josie before nodding slowly. 

“Unbelievable.” You laugh bitterly before turning your attention to Josie. She stands a little straighter when you look at her, trying her best to have the upper hand here, but she’s more worried that you’re going to go and tell your mom. 

“And you? Really Josie. You go for years hating his guts. You give me so much shit for even talking to him, and you’re screwing him?” 

“I er-I.” She stutters.

“I’m such an idiot.” You sigh. “You know a part of me thought you were happier because of me.” 

“Y/n.” Sweet Pea tries to reach you but you quickly move away from him. 

“Don’t.” You warn. 

“Wait, why are you so upset with us? We’ve been getting along, you’ve been wanting that to happen for ages.” Josie asks. 

“Because I am!” You shout. “Because you’re the worst sister in the world. You know when we were younger I could never have my own toys. If I had a doll, you had to have it. Even if mom got you one that was exactly the same. On my birthday you had to get your own present otherwise you would steal mine, and even then you’d still steal mine. And I thought, yeah that’s fine. That’s what sisters do and we were just kids then. But then we got older and we had to share friends and finally when I thought I would be able to be liked for being me. Everyone seemed to realize that you were the most interesting out of us. You had a band, and you’re so talented and pretty and just like-able and I’m none of those things.” 

“Y/n, that’s not true.” Josie starts, her voice remaining calm despite your loud cries. “It’s not true is it Sweet Pea?” She hisses and Sweet Pea jumps at the tone. 

“What, no of course not.” He says, also moving to stand in front of you. Each of them rest a hand on your shoulder but it does nothing to calm you down, if anything it makes you angrier. Years of resentment that’s been simmering under the surface has come to a boiling point. 

“Get off!” You shout and they quickly move away.

“And then I got my own friends, a group of people who liked me for who I was and who I could be myself with. I wasn’t just the other McCoy. You know, the mayor, the one in the band and the other one. But then nobody liked them and everyone told me I was horrible for wanting to be friends with them.” 

“Y/n. Please just breathe.” Sweet Pea tries again, resting a gentle hand on your upper arm and you suck in a breath. 

You’ve never seen him look so worried and you hate yourself for doing that to him, despite what’s just happened. Another set of tears roll down your cheeks and your shoulders slump. Sweet Pea wraps his arms around you, pulling you in for a proper hug and him and Josie share a confused expression. 

“Woah.” Fangs’ confused tone cuts through the awkward atmosphere and him and Toni glance at each other before looking and Sweet Pea and then Josie. “We thought you could do with some company. Plus Toni told me that Y/n bought me some Twizzlers and I couldn’t wait until tomorrow. ”

“Forget about the Twizzlers Fangs.” Toni rolls her eyes and he lets out a disappointed whine. “What’s she doing here?” Toni asks and Josie looks at the floor. 

“Leaving.” Josie nods at them. “I’ll see you around Sweet Pea.” 

“No you’re not.” You reply and move away from Sweet Pea to grab her wrist. “I know why Sweet Pea went from being so happy to being so depressed.” You fake a cheery tone. Sweet Pea and Josie sigh and look at the floor, while Toni and Fangs just look at you confused. 

“It’s because him and Josie were hooking up. But she’s dumped him and that’s what’s made him so sad.” 

“Wait really?” Fangs eyes widen. Toni grabs your hand and you send her a watery smile. 

“Okay.” You take a shaky breath. “I’ve had enough of chasing after things that clearly aren’t real. So, I’m the one leaving. I’ll see you at home Josie, and don’t worry, I won’t tell mom.” You watch as she lets out a relived sigh and gives you a thankful smile before quickly leaving. 

You turn to face Sweet Pea who’s already staring at you. His deep brown eyes scan over your body and it makes your face hot. He’s desperately trying to figure out what’s wrong and you have a feeling the tight feeling that’s settled in your chest, has a matching one sitting in his.  

“Goodbye Sweet Pea.” You say the three most painful words you can possibly think of. They taste like ash on your tongue but as soon as they’re out you feel the weight lift a little. 

Being in love is nothing like it is in movies. It’s not a secret language that only the two of you know, or spending the entire day with somebody and never wanting it to end. 

You thought it was, but it’s not. It’s far more painful than that, especially if the person you’re in love with looks at someone else the way you look at them. 

“Where are you going?” He laughs confused. 

“I really, really hope she changes her mind.” You smile through your tears and despite everything it’s a genuine wish. He’s still your best friend after all, and you want him to be happy even if it’s not with you. 

“What?” His voice breaks as he watches you leave. Toni follows after you and you force yourself to keep staring ahead. Focus on the run down sign up ahead that creaks in the wind and is one storm away from falling down.  

“Can someone tell me what I’ve done wrong.” Sweet Pea asks. 

“You went after the wrong sister, you idiot.” 

[theaviskullguy]

Ink and Petals

@dapple-dualies-propaganda here's the au

Tattoo artist! Rider x Florist! Goggles

hope you enjoy!

---------

When was it not busy at Squid ink?

It was one of the top Tattoo Parlors in Inkopolis. and it was also on a pretty busy street. So, it got a lot of customers. Also the fact that one of the artists was a famous turfer.

Rider hadn't formerly retired, but he had eased out of playing Turf Wars. He had found other interests outside of the sport: Theater, art, reviewing old movies online... He still did Turf from time to time, albeit the adult league. He was too old for the more popular teen division.

So, he found a job as a tattoo artist. And he rather loved it. Not only did most of his friends consult him for tattoo advice (from where the best places are to good designs), but he also knew some gossip. One of his regulars had beef with her neighbor because he has a pet raccoon who keeps stealing her trash and Rider could NOT wait to hear more about this story.

Another thing was, well, Rider had seen some shit. From people covered head to toe in tats, to people eagerly wanting their first tattoo, even to shyer folk who wanted one to defy controlling parents or to mark something important.

None of that prepared Rider for the news he got when tattooing one of the customers. More specifically, Gloves.

You see, Gloves had been coming in for the past few days. They had wanted a pretty complicated butterfly tat, so for the last 3 days Rider has been exchanging stories with the resident enby about... pretty much anything.

This is how this exchange happened;

"So you remember Goggles, right?" Gloves asked.

Rider rolled his eyes. "What, you think I'd forget the guy who kept pulling down my pants?"

"Oh ha ha. Anyways, apparently he works at that flower shop now."

"...He what?"

"You heard me!" They said. "I went there yesterday to get something for a project and there was Goggles! He misses you, 'ya know!"

Rider was just. quiet. He hadn't talked to his crush in a while, contact dwindled when Rider stopped doing Turf as much. Never once did he think Goggles would miss him, but that was probably the self hatred talking.

"...I'll think about it." Was all Rider said.

The conversation continued like nothing happen; Gloves saying multiple cursed things and Rider sharing interesting stories he heard on his job. Time flew by and soon, the tattoo was done; a butterfly with the bi colors on one wing and the nb colors on the other. Rider was quite proud of it, and Gloves seemed to like it. They waved, and left the store, humming to themselves.

Rider looked at the clock. His shift ended in just a few minutes. He knew he had no other appointments that day, so he took to watching old recorded matches in his phone.

Those were over a decade ago. Yet he still remembered everything. His favorite part was still learning he won a match by such a small margin. It was just... amazing.

He sighed. Rider missed those battles. But he has to say, he missed his crush a bit more.

He clocked out, saying goodbye to the other employee-Cherry (business relationships were easy to maintain when your coworkers were your siblings), and headed towards the flower shop for more reasons than one.

Army had a performance the next day. And yeah, Rider knew it was romantic, but platonically giving your best friend flowers was always nice. Plus, he wanted an excuse to see Goggles again.

He looked into the shop-the blue inkling was nowhere to be seen, but then again neither was the front desk. So, Rider shrugged and stepped in.

The floral scent was strong, but not overwhelming. Plenty of blossoms lined the stands, along with tags of what the flowers were and what they meant.

Rider looked around, trying to remember which flowers Army liked again, when he heard a familiar, youthful voice.

"Hi! Need any help?"

The inkling turned around. Goggles had definitely changed since Rider last saw him; his tentacles were longer and in an actual bun, for once. His blue eyes still had that clarity, and he still had that goofy smile. Though he didn't seem to recognize Rider.

"Uhh... I'll be fine. I'm just trying to remember what flower my friend likes the most." He said, hoping his accent didn't give him away; there weren't many in Inkopolis with an Australian accent.

But, Goggles didn't seem to notice or care. "Oh, okay!"

Rider internally breathed a sigh of relief. That would have been awkward if Goggles recognized him.

He looked around the shop, before spotting a bouquet of lilies. He knew Army liked lilies. If they weren't his favorite flower, it'd be close enough.

Rider took a few of the bigger ones, and a few white roses for variety, and took them to the counter.

Goggles smiled. "This a special occasion?"

"Not exactly. Just, my friend's doing a performance for a musical and I wanted to get him something for it." Rider explained.

"What musical?" Gogs asked, arranging the flowers with a sheer, white ribbon tying them together.

"Hadestown. He got Eurydice."

"Oh! I went to go see it last night! Army's amazing at that role. He's your friend, right?"

Rider internally panicked, but calmed down after remembering he wasn't Army's only friend. "Yeah. We've been friends for a while now."

"Well, tell him I said hi!" He handed the bouquet to Rider. "On me, alright? It's for a friend anyways!"

Rider nodded. "Thanks, mate."

"You're welcome!"

------

A few weeks went by. Rider occasionally stopped at the flower shop and got flowers for...well, no real reason. He'd use them to add color to his house, or give them to friends. He just wanted an excuse to see Goggles.

He'd talked to the blue inkling a bit more, too. He'd gotten into the business since, well, he really liked flowers, and he wanted a job where he could just...relax! He still did Turf, of course, but the Adult league was more serious than the teen one, and he just wanted to have fun instead of be expected to take a game seriously.

He still didn't recognize Rider. The yellow-green inkling was a bit hurt by this, to be honest.

Though, it was a bit startling when Goggles actually walked into Rider's work. And Rider was assigned to give Goggles his first tattoo: A blue jay on his shoulder, taking off from a branch.

This time, it was Goggles' turn to ask questions as Rider worked.

"Sooo.... you've been coming into my shop for a while and I still don't know your name!" The blue inkling stated. "I mean, you can probably recognize me though!"

Rider shrugged. "Well, who can forget Goggles of the Idiot Blue team?"

Goggles giggled. "You do know me! I still don't know you!!"

"...I can assure you, we've met before that day I got Army flowers." Rider said.

"Ooh! Can I try and guess who you are?"

"Ehh, why not."

"Okay! Umm..." Goggles thought for a moment. "Clams facemask?"

Rider shook his head. "Nope."

"Inkfall?"

"Wrong."

"Eging Jr?"

"Not even close there."

"Stealth Goggles?"

"Getting closer, I'll give you that."

"....Rider?" Goggles asked.

Rider chuckled. "Took you long enough, idiot."

Goggles smiled wide. "I finally found you! Hi Riri!"

"Hey, Gogs. It's been a while."

"Yeah! I'm a bit surprised I didn't recognize you, since we were pretty close!" Goggles stated.

Rider shrugged. "Well, I'm not the most memorable person anyways."

"Riderrrrr don't say that!" Goggles said. "You're still really popular!"

"To some people, maybe. Not everyone."

There was a tense silence, other than the hum of the tattoo needle as it made the drawing.

"....So." Goggles started again. "How's life?"

"It's...well, better than it was." Rider said. "Got my own place, for one. Though it gets a bit lonely.. You?"

"I'm still living in an apartment. I really want a roommate!" Goggles proclaimed. "Maybe we could move in together?"

"..I'll think about it, Gogs. Though it might be fun being your roommate."

"Really? Thanks Rider!" Goggled smiled.

The conversation grew more casual. Rider enjoyed it; turns out Goggles had his fair share of gossip. It was kinda cool.

And as the next few days passed, Rider looked forward to each of those sessions. His crush seemed to go from "this person would be fun to date i think" to "hOLY MOTHER OF THE GODS IM IN L O V E", and it didn't help that during those meetings, Goggles had to be shirtless.

The days turned into weeks and months. Goggles moved in with Rider, and the two became incredibly close friends.

And, it came to a head near valentines day. Goggles' shop was very busy, as expected. Luckily, Squid Ink wasn't as much.

So, on his day off, just before Valentines, Rider headed to the flower shop and got a bouquet of roses. Cliché to confess on Valentines day, Rider knew, but he's a pining gay cut him some slack.

And Rider came home right as Goggles was leaving for his shift. So, that left Rider with a good 3 hours to practice his confession.

"Alright, Rider. This has to be CASUAL. 'Hey, I've liked you for over a decade but just now had the confidence to confess!' No, too creepy sounding. 'Yo, Gogs. I really like you and maybe we could go out to dinner sometimes?' ...Too casual."

....Yeah, this went on for a while.

Rider groaned, collapsing his his bed. "I wish feelings were fucking easier...I should just call Army."

So, he grabbed his phone and selected the contact, Veronica Sawyer Kinnie

"C'mon, Army... pick up."

And not one ring later, "Rider, what is it?"

"...I need romantic help. Please." Rider asked.

"Look, just because I'm married to Aloha, doesn't mean I know how I ended up here."

"Yeah, I kinda know that." He stated. "Still. I really need some help."

Army sighed. "Who is it? It's totally that one person with the raccoon story-"

"Actually, no. It's, um.... It's Goggles."

The octoling on the other end of the line could be heard sighing. "Still a morosexual I see."

"OI! You're the one who married a fuckin himbo!"

".....Touché. Still, there's a difference."

Rider huffed. "Just... give me some advice. I wanna confess to him tomorrow but I've got no idea how. I'm giving him roses, but like, there's gotta be something more I could do, y'know?"

"Have you tried asking Prince?" Army suggested. "He is the one with the obsession with rom coms and romance novels."

"This is his exam period, Army. I'm not about to potentially interrupt a cram session by asking for romantic advice!"

"Fair enough. I'd say...well, just rip off the band aid. Like... 'Hey, Goggles, I really like you and was wondering if you'd like to be my boyfriend.'"

"...Thanks, Arm. I'll, uh, give it a try."

-------

Rider couldn't sleep that well. Mainly out of anticipation.

He was gonna confess to his crush of...over a decade, at least. He didn't fuckin know what was gonna happen!

Like, would Goggles reciprocate? Would he hate Rider after it? WHAT THE FUCK WOULD HAPPEN-

He sighed. He needed to get his mind off this shit.

Rider looked over to his bedside clock: 5AM. 5 hours before his shift. 5 hours to get his shit together and plan for confessing to the world's cutest but also dumbest man later that night.

C'mon, Rider. Think. Army said to rip it off like a band aid, but Goggles might find that a little sudden and out of the blue. He could write a letter and leave it for Goggles when he went to his shift (The flower shop was closed on Valentines day). That would be a safe option.

Rider sat up, and got out a piece of paper and pencil, writing a note.

"Hey, Goggles.

There's something I've been wanting to tell you for a while. I really, really like you. As in, a crush.

I totally get it if you don't like me back, or think I'm weird, but hey, I was wondering if you'd wanna go out to dinner or something. Probably not tonight cause of Valentine's day but maybe tomorrow night or something.

-Rider"

Quickly, he folded it and wrote Goggles' name, putting a little heart sticker on it. It was corny, but hey, Rider had to use up those stickers somehow.

Rider attached it to the roses, and kept it on his desk.

And so, the morning went as normal. He had breakfast, got out of his pjs, put his hair up... the usual.

But as Rider left to go to work, he left the note and rose on the table, and left the house quickly.

During the day, he nearly forgotten all about it; He caught up with the gossip-Apparently the neighbor with the raccoon and the regular were now dating. So that was a nice little end to the story.

Squid Ink wasn't AS busy-probably because it was Valentines day, people were spending it with their lovers, not getting inked up (unless they made the appointment when single)

And it was near the end of Rider's shift when he heard his name mentioned. Probably someone making an appointment before he heard the familiar voice of Goggles going "Okay!!"

The blue inkling walked over to his station. "Hi Ridey!!"

"...Hey, Gogs. Getting another tat?" Rider asked, trying to keep his cool.

Goggles nodded. "Yeah!!!"

"A'ight anything specific in mind or-"

"Can I get just a simple quote one?"

Rider nodded. "Where do you want it?"

Goggles pulled down the collar of his shirt slightly. "Right here, please!"

"Okay. Just try to keep holding that down so I don't mess up.

-----

And so, tattoo conversations ensued.

The quote Goggles had wanted was a simple Pride one, that said "love is love". It was discreet, but a bit of it could be seen poking out if Goggles ever wore a v-neck.

"So, any plans for tonight?" Rider asked, trying to keep things subtle. Maybe Goggles hadn't read the note yet.

The blue inkling nodded. "Kinda! I had mental plans buuuuut nothing serious."

Rider raised an eyebrow. "Who with?"

"..I m-mean, I still have to ask him.." Goggles' face turned a shade of blue, and he averted his gaze.

"....Can I guess who he is?"

"If ya can!"

He smiled. "Does his name have an R in it?" Rider had a guess it was himself, but it wouldn't hurt to check.

Goggles nodded. "Yeah!"

"Got an accent?"

"Yep!!"

"Is he doing your tattoo?"

"....y-yeah?" Goggles sheepishly smiled. "I'm n-not that discreet, am I?"

Rider chuckled, but on the inside he was screeching. "Honestly? I had no clue myself."

"Really? I've been dropping the most obvious hints!"

"...Like what?" Rider asked, now a bit curious.

"Welllll I've been picking movies you like during movie night, I've made sure to get your drink on coffee runs, Oh! And I offered to cook dinner that one time!" Goggles stated.

"...Damn. I'm just oblivious then." The former dynamo user laughed, before turning off the needle. "There. It's all done." Rider held up a mirror for the blue boy.

Goggles' face lit up. "Whoa! It looks amazing!!! Thanks Riri!"

Rider smiled. "You're welcome. Now, uh, ...did you read my note?"

"..Y-yeah, I did. And, um...I like you too Rider!!" The blue man pressed a small, quick kiss to Rider's cheek.

Rider blushed. "S-so, you'll let me t-take you out?"

Goggles nodded. "Yeah!!!"

"I...thanks, Gogs."

"You're welcome Riri!!!"

----------

aAAAAA RUSHED END

but like. hope yall enjoy!