#yeah yeah i have a problem

[krysmcscience]

Did somebody say Bill shouldn't be allowed to swear? I think somebody said Bill shouldn't be allowed to swear. Thanks to that, have these retooled The Good Place jokes:

The "powers that be" can refer to either the Theraprism staff, the Axolotl, or just. Ya know. Disney in general. Or all three! Whichever you think is funniest. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The "party" Bill's referring to is Weirdmageddon, of course. He was quite the ashhole to everyone back then.

Ford has probably gotten pretty good at the 'tune out your psychopathic ex with dank memes' challenge.

It must be very cathartic to be able to make Bill shut up whenever you want with just the press of a button. I'm sure Ford doesn't abuse this ability at all.

Oh, sure, 'Not now,' he says, before he immediately backs out of the newly-made hole in the Theraprism wall. 🙄

Don't worry, Bill doesn't get far.

also yeah i know this one doesn't have an attempted swear - i just wanted to use the joke because of the massive stink-eye involved in it because it makes me laugh

⬇️ More goofs beneath the brief ramble if you wanna skip it lmao⬇️

Why is Ford even there, you might ask? Well, he either decided he preferred to watch Bill suffer in person over being distantly and repeatedly harassed with the same evil desperation book for the rest of his life, or he got roped into some kind of contrived community service for 1.) all his many counts of interdimensional thievery, and 2.) his ignoring all the very clear warnings to NOT summon Bill in the first place (which I like to imagine is also illegal). Theraprism staff were just like, 'Wait, this guy matters to Bill? Ooh, we can USE that! It might be the only thing that can help him want to get better!' It is not considered that throwing Ford at Bill so soon after Weirdmageddon could instead make them both WORSE - in new and altogether special ways! :D

Anyway, I'm calling it the Community Service AU, and I am most likely not going to do anything else with it beyond appropriating these silly Good Place jokes. So, feel free to adopt the concept if y'all wanna??? Just make sure that Bill is still not allowed to swear, no matter what, full stop. It's gotta be a real linguistic corkblork of a situation for him, is all I'm sayin'.

Finally, have these bonus Good Place jokes, but with Handyman!Bill this time:

'Opposite tortures' doesn't sound so bad...at least until it's an all-powerful chaos entity known for torture saying it.

you may think i forgot mabel's cute pink cheeks but the truth is that i did in fact forget but then immediately stopped caring which makes it okay, SHHHHHHH

And, finally:

lmao this is shit

True facts, if you cram Season 1 Eleanor Shellstrop and Michael into a singular triangle shape, they turn into Bill Cipher. This is science, look it up. Or don't, and just trust the source that is me, bro.

Anyway, I should be in bed, y'all have fun with these, I guess. Tune in after like a week or so and maybe I'll have an addendum to my comic about how Bill was drawn naked for karaoke night. Because him actually being naked was not the only thing I considered as a plausible explanation. XD

Also if you see any inconsistencies or errors in any of these comics, No You Do Not :D

Also also, reblogs are rad as hell and I appreciate every single one, just don't repost, please and thanks. Every time a repost is made, an artist somewhere cries. :,)

[prlssprfctn]

To this day, I think the crack-au with Jason joining Bruce Wayne alike competition for fun and accidentally winning, and this becoming a reason why the whole Batfamily finds out that Jason is alive in the first place, is the funniest version of a fix-it scenario.

[ianthewife]

tabitha scarlet is literally an insane character girlie’s dna is made of mommy issues and old money she is anti-union her diet consists of three (3!) things and those are mac n cheese, pb&j and ice cream and that’s it she is snappy and sour and objectively unpleasant and so fucking tired and lonely her hair is the color of pale greasy butter she once called child labor good old times she didnt survive a homoerotic teenage friendship she is a failwoman and a boss of a literal (but also failing) coal mine who lives in a wet cardboard box (a run-down mansion that is 70% leaks (and probably black mold) and is this close to quite literally falling off a cliff) oh and yeah she is also just straight up fucking haunted—

[rystiel]

i keep seeing people say the doctor shouldn’t have feelings for rogue because he’s married to river…? river song… who has also married multiple people��� one of the most polyamorous characters in the show…?

[gwendolynnderolo]

vox machina memes part 4

vox machina memes | mighty nein memes

[inkskinned]

hey btw if you're in the USA at  2:20 p.m. ET on Wednesday, Oct. 4, they're testing the emergency broadcast system. your phone is probably going to make a really loud noise, even if it's on silent. there's a backup date on the 11th if they need to postpone it.

if you're not in a safe situation and have an extra phone, you should turn that phone completely off beforehand.

additionally, if you're like me, and are easily startled; i recommend treating it like a party. have a countdown or something. be surrounded by your loved ones. take the actions you personally need to take to make yourself safe.

i have already seen mockery towards any person who feels nervous about this. for the record, it completely, completely valid to have "emergency broadcast sounds" be an anxiety trigger. do not let other people make fun of you for that. emergency sounds are legitimately engineered to make us take action; those of us with high levels of anxiety and/or neurodivergence are already pre-disposed to have a Bad Time. sometimes it is best to acknowledge that the situation will be triggering for some, and to prepare for that; rather than just saying "well that's stupid, it's just a test."

"loud scary sound time" isn't like, my favorite thing, but we can at least try to prevent some additional anxiety by preparing for it. maybe get yourself a cake? noise cancelling headphones? the new hozier album? whatever helps. love u, hope you're okay. we are gonna ride it out together.

[asvidema]

a bit late, but i decided i'd give it a shot anyway

hansry day 1 - flowers

[ctrlhope]

Lily pleaseeee share your favorite ot7 hybrid fics, i can’t find any 😭😭😭😭

OMGGGG BB YOUVE COME TO THE RIGHT PLACE OKIEEE I LOVE OT7 FICS REAL BAD

I’ve been reading hybrid fics p much since I started reading bts fanfics so… I can hook u up dastardly style 🤩 links under the cut <33

so before I start listing ima be so fr and say I like most of my hybrid fics verryy formulaic. i p much only ready hybrid bts x human reader and I really enjoy the whole plot of ‘y/n inherits bts and doesn’t know what to do!’ Or ‘y/n sees 7 hybrids at the shelter who need help and doesn’t know what to do!’. It feels sooo chicken noodle soup to me and it feels good for my soul <33 so I hope these fics feel like chicken noodle soup for u too and that you love them as much as I do <33

Series

Abundance ✰ @angelicyoongie

HYBRID CLASSIC FICCCC actually one of the first hybrid fics I think I ever read?? Def the first hybrid ot7 which is kinda crazy 😭 perfect chicken soup for the soul <33 probably the basis for the way I like hybrid fics I read formatted now!! you can really see how the authors writing grew with this fic. Was the fic that made me fall in love with hybrids, actually. I love all of her work so bad man [last updated: 10/4/24]

Trouvaille ✰ @spookyserenades

on my main recs list for a REASON!!! MODERN OT7 CLASSIC FIC!!! if you like the slowest of burns… you’ll enjoy this fic heavily. once again my favourite chicken-soup style so I can’t help but recommend it <33 I have… so many words id like to say about coyote jimin and hoseok… but I will remain silent for my own dignity 😔love all of her work terribly <33 [last updated: 8/17/24]

SeVen Uncaged ✰ @/missing_min_meowmeow (ao3) and @/polaritae (ao3)

two part series (first half completed, second half not) detailing the difficulties of adopting 7 hybrids reader was completely unprepared for 🙂‍↕️ YESSS MA’AM!!! LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!! I love how this fic goes into the details of how difficult mentally and physically this kind of change would be for the hybrids. I love the characterisation of each of the boys. I LOVE IT!!!! pls give this series a chance it is so definitely worth it even though it’s unfinished. A love it terribly, in its entirety. I LOVE FLAWED CHARACTERS!!! [last updated: 9/11/23]

Restitution ✰ @/cloudtea (ao3) @cloudteawrites (tumblr)

like I said I REALLY like fanfics where reader comes into a bunch of hybrids and has to deal with the consequences 😭 that being said, this has exactly everything I love in a hybrid fic, I absolutely love the concept, and the stories of where each of the guys came from before. THIS is exactly what I mean when I say a chicken soup fic— warm and comforting. Hopefully the author will come back to it someday <33 it’s so good even though it’s just the beginning [last updated: 4/19/21 — permanent hiatus]

Loving You Isn’t Hard to Learn ✰ @/arduouslove (ao3) @arduouslove (tumblr)

MANNN ITS SO WARM AND COMFORTING!!! like,, i know i keep saying chicken soup and IM SORRY BUT THATS WHAT THESE ARE FOR ME!!! I absolutely adore the concept of a motel for hybrids to go when they need help. And I really love the development we’ve seen so far between Hoseok and jimin. Another fic that was left at the beginning, but truly lovely. Another one I hope the author updates again someday <33 [last updated: 03/07/23]

Still Life ✰ @/king_myg (ao3)

OKAY NO YOU DONT UNDERSTAND THIS IS ACTUALLY LIKE,,, ONE OF MY FAVOURITE HYBRID FICS IVE READ!! The concept behind it is just so,, intriguing. It’s a yandere fic, so it has that edge to it but the way jungkook just *is* is so…. No you actually just have to read it to understand. I love this fic sooo bad actually. And Yoongi who pretends not to be a hybrid… and!! I really can’t express in words how exciting this was for me to read. I can’t wait to see how the rest of the guys relationships develop with the reader. [last updated: 5/22/24]

Home Calls the Heart ✰ @anonnie-in-wonderland

verryyy cute ot7 fic <33 the first chapter just feels very warm and soft. its adorable how tae wants to 'adopt' a human for his family even though he doesn't quite understand the repercussions of it [last updated: 12/17/22]

About love ✰ @mochiimac

One of my favourite tropes of reader coming into hybrids and them all hating each other right off the bat!! The writing style feels so safe too <33 [last updated: 04/24/3]

A Hundred Percent Human ✰ @/wrienne (ao3) @wrienne (tumblr)

Another CLASSIC ot7 hybrid fic!! I remember reading the first few chapters before I took a break from fanfics back in the day. Each of the characters (bts memebers) are so interesting and I love the personalities the author made around them as well as all the world building they did within the fic. The class system was so interesting to me and TAEHYUNG??? God, such a fun and dynamic story!! Highly recommend you check it out [last updated: 7/24/23]

Daddy’s Money Makes the World Go Round ✰ @/That_Author (ao3)

SOOO warm and comfortable. Guarddog Namjoon rlly just wants to keep the reader safe even though her parents are mean. Their relationship (as well as the rest of the guys that come into the home) is just SO sweet n gentle <3 [last updated: 10/28/22]

Oneshots

Secret Story of the Swan ✰ @purpleyoonn

one of the few yandere fics on the list and oh so sweet <33 the way they gently lure reader is so 🥺 and she gives in easily to their charms 🥺 v cute little oneshot <33 love her a lot

Beastly Gods ✰ @lemonjoonah

A CLASSICCCCCC one of the only (other) yandere fics on this list. mostly taehyung x reader w/ implied ot7 x reader ++ drabbles featuring ot7 x reader. I love this fic so much actually you don’t understand. It holds such a special place in my heart PLS READ IT!!

Tangled Hearts ✰ @writersrealmbts

Adorable look into readers life with 7 hybrids <33 truly love how this fic played out and the interactions the members had with eachother and the reader. ITS JUST REAL CUTE OKAY!!!! Makes me all soft nd gushy!! Very cute <33 i love it.

To Be Read / Currently Reading

Kindness ✰ @/angelaronin (ao3)

Stray Cat Strut ✰ @/typhloticharuspex (ao3)

Meritocracy ✰ @/saylilirose (ao3)

The Dog Days are Over ✰ @/mintedmango (ao3)

Redamancy ✰ @/dalgi_jungoo (ao3)

A Sweet Change ✰ @/kagsii (ao3)

Peculiar Pack ✰ @/dollremi (ao3)

If anyone has any reads I didn’t mention comment them or message me them!!

** I’ll update this as I read more / find more fics I’ve read in the past that I enjoyed!! By no means is it complete, these are just the fics I’ve read/reread recently nd enjoyed <33 Currently going through my tumblr likes to see if I’ve missed any <33 ✰ last updated: 01/19/25

Main Rec List | individual/poly hybrid rec list (coming soon)

[yogurthoopsart]

I am making the AUs i want to see in the world (it's another swap au. all of them are swap aus)

Shadow's meteor crashes on earth in modern day, right onto the baseball field in Green Hills causing the blackout. Tom investigates, finds this strange memory-less creature, and now suddenly they're on the run from the government and Robotnik. Shadow's conflict comes from the fear that he will hurt Tom, rather than the original movie's conflict of sonic being pissed that Tom was leaving Green Hills.

Sonic's timeline is pushed back 60 years, and he dimension-jumps from Longclaw's death right into Gun's custody. He spends 10 years growing up in the facility with Maria, slowly growing okay with how he's going against Longclaw's wishes of staying hidden - until Maria dies. He's put in stasis for 50 years and wakes up feeling like everyone he gets close to dies, so he decides to go back to the Dimension Jumping plan, but Gerald gets him to help with his Ark plan before he leaves.

[outtamynoggin]

It's crazy what he gets away with (and who the ones letting him get away with it are)

Bruce: What Nightwing did might have been... unconventional, but it worked.

Tim: Exactly. I mean, sure, the plan might have involved hacking into Gotham’s power grid, a few strategic distractions, and, uh, some minor illegal surveillance-

Barbara: MINOR? DISTRUBANCES??

Tim: Okay, fine! The plan also had a teensy bit of hacking into the stock market, manipulating a few politicians, and borrowing a couple confidential documents, but nobody was harmed!

Bruce: ...In the strictest sense.

Tim: Yes! See, it's a win-win solution!

Barbara: *furious* You two are insane. You’re treating morally ambiguous like it’s a fun new hobby. He practically engineered an escape from a high-security prison by tricking the entire staff into thinking it was game night. In addition, he orchestrated a city-wide blackout just to steal classified documents, and you’re calling it genius?

Bruce: Very resourceful.

Tim: I mean... it’s not his fault they didn’t know how to play Dungeons & Dragons. Also, I want to see who else could pull off a high-profile heist while simultaneously launching a PR campaign for a new tech startup!

Bruce: *to Tim* Wayne Enterprise's tech gadgets cleared the shelves, we need to speed up production.

Tim: Already on it.

Barbara: You’re defending this? That’s not genius, that’s a psychotic breakdown wrapped in a cape! It's madness layered up in a three-piece suit!

Bruce and Tim: It’s Dick.

Barbara: I swear, if it was anyone else, you’d be throwing them in a cell for years.

Bruce and Tim: It’s Nightwing. He has plausible deniability.

Barbara: Plausible? I think he has a whole separate universe of deniability!

[xabarik]

the only flaw is being a human the main advantage is being a human ⋆｡┊˚. ੈ ⋆｡˚┊˚✩｡

[peopleareaproblem]

Colourblind Fiyero

I'm sure I'm not the first person to have this idea but I thought of this literally half-asleep at 1 AM and bolted up to note it down.

Anyway what if movie!Fiyero is red/green colourblind and when he and Feldspar almost run over Elphaba, he doesn't see the Elphaba on the left, but the one on the right? reblog if u think the girl on the left is j-

And the reason he looks like this when he sees her face:

... is not because he is realising it's too late to stop himself from saying the words "blended in with the foliage" to the green girl, but because he has two eyes and a heart and just saw Cynthia Erivo in the woods. (And Feldspar sure as shit doesn't notice anything either because horses cannot see red and he is used to people looking kinda green.)

Fiyero arrives at Shiz well after everyone sings a song about how green and annyoing Elphaba is, and the day after he arrives Galinda has taken her under her wing and made her popular, causing people to stop talking shit. So, what if Fiyero just does not find out Elphaba is green until like 2/3rds through the movie? He just straight up misses it, does not know she is an outcast, and just thinks she isn't into him for some bizarre reason. And only when he finds out she has green skin does he realise that he said the foliage thing, which she would definitely have taken as a jab, and actually he was incredibly rude to her. ... Oh no.

LOOK. Obviously I love that Fiyero just is not Fantasy Racist™ and doesn't think there's anything wrong with Elphaba being green. HOWEVER, wouldn't it be funny if-

[lizardbrainlabs]

Your interpretation of Hector talking with Bauhauzzo post-game (if you can see that happening) would be neat!!

oh the horrors of knowing no one can fix the problem except for you

[swiggity-swexual-i-am-asexual]

Danny Fenton, aka Phantom, has been given a new task!

In short, literally no one in the Ghost Zone/Infinite Realms wants their mostly peaceful afterlife to be rocked by a certain Gotham rogue named Joker. Which, when he dies, is almost sure to happen because of whatever the hell was in that vat he dropped in included ectoplasm. So, yay, he’s also a little ghostly too, meaning he *is* pretty hard to kill. Unfortunately, there’s also a certain vigilante that is quite keen to murder him in recent years.

So now Danny has to keep the mass murderer trauma clown alive for as long as he possibly can while attempting to keep the Joker from. Well. Being the Joker.

Oh, and naturally, Danny got this assignment AFTER Joker got out of Arkham. Again. And entirely blew up the asylum. Time to join the Goonion, he is NOT doing this without getting PAID, thank you.

[blue-mood-blue]

Of all the missed opportunities with Gongyi Xiao (of which there are many, why would you do that to my boy), I think the one I pine over most is that open and available invitation to Qing Jing Peak.

Because, if timed right, the possibilities are fucking hilarious.

You’re Gongyi Xiao. Your pride has taken a little bit of a hit after the Immortal Alliance Conference both because everyone expected you to place first (and you didn’t) and your teacher got so distracted by the one who did place first that you’ve felt a little… neglected. But you’re a nice person, and the conference ended with the deaths of so many of your shidi and shimei that you let the petty concerns roll off your back.

Except then the guy who pulled the upset at the conference shows up at your sect and pulls an upset on every other aspect of your life. The girl you like and who you thought liked you has heart eyes for him only, your teacher is definitely putting you on the backburner to the point of handing this guy most of your responsibilities (and he’s killing it, he’s doing amazing, it’s the conference all over again), and everyone else in the sect seems to prefer him to you. No one’s cruel about it, and they’re still listening to you - mostly. Most of the time. But you have the sinking suspicion that if it came to an actual disagreement between the two of you, you know who’d end up on top. Plus he looks just like you, except hotter. Maybe that’s not the kind of thing a guy like Gongyi Xiao outright perceives but there’s a vibe. The vibe of inadequacy.

(And because you’re Gongyi Xiao and a good person, you don’t have the kind of suspicion in your heart to start looking for ulterior motives or conniving plots - but even if you did, what would you find? The guy who is looking more and more like your replacement came to the sect injured. He looks sadly and deeply into the distance every time his original sect or shizun are mentioned. He’s polite. He’s talented. What are you supposed to say, that he survived unexpected disaster at the conference only to hatch some sort of hostile takeover plot in the meantime? Who would believe that.)

So, maybe it’s time to step back. Clear your head. Shake off the ridiculous and unfair jealousy, and give both yourself and Luo Binghe some space. What better time to take Shen Qingqiu up on his offer to visit Qing Jing? You can’t stop what’s happening regardless, so maybe it would be better not to be there while someone else swoops in and steals your whole life. (And maybe, tucked away deep in a not-so-good-of-a-person-after-all corner of your heart, there’s the possibility of slipping a few hints to Shen Qingqiu that his disciple is alive and well at another sect. Purely because Shen Qingqiu deserves not to mourn for someone still alive, and not at all for the sliver of hope that he’ll take the disciple he misses so much back so you can go back to the way things used to be.)

Meanwhile, unbeknownst to anyone else and especially not Gongyi Xiao, Luo Binghe is losing his mind. He had a plan. He was establishing himself. He was moving slowly and carefully so as not to startle Shizun, and this guy gets an invitation? Just, welcomed right in, specially, by Luo Binghe’s teacher? What did he do to deserve that? Is Shen Qingqiu going to poach Gongyi Xiao? As his replacement? So he can have a squeaky clean, good, human disciple like he wanted? Luo Binghe is better than him. He proved it at the conference. He proved it before the conference. He’ll prove it again if he has to. (He’s more attractive than Gongyi Xiao, too, and Shizun can hardly fail to notice if they’re side by side in front of him, so there.)

The Old Palace Master is using every trick in his arsenal to keep Luo Binghe from following right behind Gongyi Xiao while cursing Shen Qingqiu under his breath and frantically moving plans around to push up the date for the peak lord’s fall from grace, Luo Binghe is packing his bags furiously and tearing his own plans to shreds in the wake of his determination to prove himself absolutely irreplaceable, and Gongyi Xiao is enjoying a nice cup of tea and personal tutoring from Shen Qingqiu while making increasingly pointed comments about how sometimes missing-and-presumed-dead disciples just… pop up somewhere, at random, a few years after the fact.

Shen Qingqiu is blissfully (miserably) unaware of the chaos about to descend upon his peak.

[chiricat]

ryomina demons are winning