#yeah so this is just me rambling at midnight

[crookedteethed]

ᥫ᭡. that time you got period blood in rafe's bed.

warnings: nothing but fluff and that time of the month shenanigans

a/n: brain wouldn't shut up tonight, so here's some soft rafe cameron for you girlies. 🤍

You wake up to that familiar cramping sensation and immediately know.

Your eyes snap open in horror, taking in the expensive Egyptian cotton sheets beneath you – Rafe's sheets. Rafe's very white, very expensive sheets that now have a very obvious stain.

"Shit," you whisper, mortification flooding your system as you try to quietly extract yourself from his arms without waking him.

"Mmm, where are you going." His sleep-rough voice catches you mid-escape attempt. Before you can stop him, he's pulling you back against his chest, nuzzling into your neck.

"Rafe, no – I need to—" But it's too late. You feel the exact moment he realizes, his body stilling behind you.

"I'm so sorry," you start rambling, trying to wiggle free. "I know how expensive these sheets are. I'll replace them, I swear—"

"Hey." His voice has that edge to it, the one that means you're being ridiculous. "Look at me."

You shake your head, face burning. "I ruined your sheets."

"Baby girl." There's amusement in his voice now. "You really think I give a fuck about some sheets?" His lips find your temple. "You hurting?"

The gentle question beneath his usual rough exterior makes your chest tight. You nod slightly.

"Alright, here's what's happening." It's his business voice, the one that means no arguments. "You're gonna take a hot shower, steal whatever you want from my closet, and I'm grabbing you some aspirin." He pauses. "And those chocolate strawberries in the fridge? Yeah, those weren't for tomorrow's country club bullshit."

You look up at him, surprised. "You knew?"

The corner of his mouth quirks up. "Princess, you really think I don't have your cycle tracked? Who do you think keeps restocking the tampons under my sink?"

You resist the urge to roll your eyes. Of course he'd be smug about being thoughtful. Your heart then does that stupid flutter thing it always does when he shows he actually pays attention.

Later, curled up on his ridiculously expensive couch, wearing his softest hoodie, you watch him navigate your heating pad with intense focus. The chocolate strawberries are perfect, and every time a cramp hits, his hand finds your lower back like it's instinct.

"Better?" he murmurs against your hair.

"Mmm." You sink further into him. "Still sorry about the sheets though."

He snorts. "Baby, I could buy new sheets every day for the next decade and not dent my wallet." His arms tighten possessively. "Now shut up about the sheets and eat your chocolate."

You turn to look at him, this man who tracks your period in his phone but would probably murder anyone who knew about it. This version of Rafe Cameron – the one who handles period stains and midnight cramps with the same intensity he handles everything else – is just for you.

"I love you," you whisper.

"Yeah?" That signature smirk plays at his lips. "Prove it by stopping this guilt shit about my sheets."

But his kiss is gentle, and when another cramp hits, his hands are already there, steady and sure.

What Figure Eight would never believe: how the infamous Rafe Cameron keeps tampons in his bathroom and period tracking apps on his phone.

But that's okay – let them have their trust fund tyrant. This softer version is yours alone.

[becauseplot]

And yet another thing for 90 Seconds to Midnight AU that I wrote yesterday. As usual, spoilers for OSNF finale and generally up through OPD 6.

I feel like I never explored the potential for Liz's nightmares in the au. I should fix that.

Some nights, Liz dreams of the moment the bomb went off behind her as she and the others fled from the God of Death. She dreams of turning around and instead of seeing Thiago's body flung out of the way of the blast, she sees nothing but flames, a wall of fire so bright it burns twisted afterimages into her eyes. She dreams of running to his limp, half-burned body and putting her fingers to his throat and searching and searching and searching and searching and searching and never finding that pulse. She dreams of the instant she touches his throat, flames erupt anew beneath her fingers and begin to consume what is left of his body and Thiago screams Daniel screams Alex screams her mother screams screams SCREAMS---

And she wakes, drenched in cold sweat and tears streaming down her face.

On nights where she's in the other bed, or asleep on the couch, or passed out at her desk, or just not with Thiago, she'll go find him and check to make sure that he's still there and breathing. Sometimes he's awake, sometimes he's not; sometimes seeing him there---alive and well and proof that she hasn't destroyed everything she loves yet---is enough, sometimes it's not. Sometimes she will sit or lie next to him and hesitantly place tired fingers to his throat and find pulse fluttering beneath his jaw.

And Thiago will wake. "S'it still there?"

And Liz will huff. "Yes," she'll say, loud enough so he will hear it. And loud enough so he will hear her annoyance, fond as it is.

"Mmn. Tha's a relief." And he will pat her hand, and he will murmur something about how he can always count on her, though that thought will probably be lost to the slur of unconsciousness.

It's enough, most of the time. Enough, at least, until the nightmare comes again. Enough, at least, to find something like sleep again.

[whyoneartheven]

suddenly I have realized my bad habit of procrastinating has become a nearly debilitating fear

[chaosduckies]

Work on another g/t animation orrrr finish up writing chapter 3 of Friends in Small Places? Decisions decisions.

[masterfuldoodler]

Anyone else use to 'train' yourself in case you went blind later in life? (attempt to do things with your eyes closed)

[yume-fanfare]

something about hina's characterization is that he's both girlish and boyish. boyish in a girl way if you will but you can't really forget one or the other. And sometimes mellow when the situation calls for it but it has to be a rare occurrence or else it won't be significative, that's the fun part of the quiet moments like in tetora's fs1. engstars is lacking when it comes to her theatrics though 💔

[familyofpaladins]

I HAD A REVELATION

okay so I was thinking about gender. My gender. And my feelings about being a cis girl over time.

When I was little I used to wear all kinds of dresses and wore nail polish and even occasionally makeup (but like. Sloppily as a 7 year old would lol) and how overtime I stopped wearing nail polish and stopped wearing dresses and despised make up. I dont really remeber why I stopped with nail polish. Maybe because it flaked off too easily or maybe I was sick of the few colors we had idk. I know I gradually stopped wearing dresses and night gowns because I was sick of being told I couldnt "put my legs up [up against the wall or just straight up in the air] or that I had to sit a certain way while wearing one. So I wore more and more pants.

I think about how i used to stand in the toys aisles while my mom did grocery shopping and look at "The Boys" section and think how much cooler it was than the girls section.

And I think about how my music teacher told us one day we'd hit puberty and we'd grow and us girls would be like "[in a high pitched voice] OH MY GOSH I LOVE BOYS AND DID YOU HEAR ABOUT SO AND SO" and I looked over at my classmates and friends to see if they were also terrified of becoming annoying teenage boy-obsessed girls.

And i think about how when I was at my friend's house and we were building "tree forts" in the woods i would wish I had a penis for the convenience of being able to just go pee behind a tree, because squatting near the ground was Not Fun and I hated walking all the way back to the house. And I think about how I hated that I'd have to wear a bra once my boobs started to come in

Now you might be thinking. Friend I think you want[ed] to be a boy. But the thing is, i dont.

I may have hated being restricted in dresses but I dont actually hate them. I've gotten a couple dresses in the last 10 years (for prom and graduation and a [not my] wedding) and how I actually did like how I looked in them and enjoyed wearing them for that time.

I think about how I was jealous of the boys selection of toys, but also how I had a ton of barbies that I massively enjoyed and how if I'd been a boy I probably wouldnt have been able to enjoy them (thanks to pressure from society) as well as a bunch of other "girly" items and shows and movies. I think about how I'm actually Asexual and that I wasnt scared of becoming "a young woman", I just didnt understand the obsession with sex/romance/boyfriend&girlfriend stuff.

And while having a penis is more convenient for peeing I also remeber thinking that it would suck to get kicked in the balls and/or that trope of falling on soemthign between your legs that happens in so many movies (not that it feels any better with a vagina honestly). And that if I had been born a boy I'd most likely have to deal with all the toxic masculinity forced on me, and I'm glad I dont have to deal with that.

And while me and my boobs dont always get along, I remember that after getting my first cute bra, I thought. Oh well maybe this isnt so bad. And I mostly wear sports bras now because I do wish they were smaller and I HATE that so many bras (EVEN THE SPORTS BRAS) are already padded into cup shapes, and while I don't mind Having Boobs, i Do Not want to show them off. And sometimes i think that maybe i wouldn't mind chopping them off, but then i think how my figure/outline/silhouette would look with out them, and that seems worse.

And i think about the times I've accidentally been called "Sir" from tired fast food employees when wearing gender nonspecific clothing and felt happy about it. But not "oh it feels right to be called sir/he/him" , but more of "hehe I fooled you! You thought this was a dress but its pants!"

And really this is all to say. I was born a girl and grew up that way so it's what I'm used to. If I'd been born with a dick then I guess I'd be a guy. If you magically stuck me in a male body right now, would I feel like a Guy or feel like a girl in a guys body? I honestly dont know. So am I non binary? Maybe that that doesnt quite feel right either.

Being a girl is what I've grown up as and into, and it's what I'm used to and going by anything else is… odd. Maybe itd be better and maybe it wouldnt. It's like an old blanket. You've had it forever and maybe its frayed and patched maybe a little too small and it's not what people expect you to have for a blanket, and maybe you could do with a new one. But nothing feels right with out it. No other blanket feels the same. It's what you're used to and its familar. It's a comfort blanket.

And that's why being a [cis] girl is my comfort gender.

[rendoa-blog]

Was yapping to a friend about something I was really obsessed with as a kid and am still really passionate about when he fell asleep mid rant

He woke up 5 minutes later when I was writing this and how sad I was

He listened a bit more to me yapping because I was excited to get back into it

And them he fell asleep again mid another rant about the same thing but I kept yapping because there was one other person in the call

But then that other person had to gi do the dishes and now I'm happier than I was at first because yay someone actually wanted to listen (... even if one fell asleep. The other one didn't have any complaints, though, and I am happy about it :D) but also I didn't get to finish my yapping session :(

[gemharvest]

Sleep last night kinda sucked cuz like. I ended up deciding at like 10:40pm I'd just go to sleep but my body treated that like a nap ??? and not proper sleep? So I woke up several times throughout the night and had to force myself not to do anything. So I could keep going back to sleep. Wasn't really that fun tbh.

Anyways I have decided this is what GF deals with but like. Regularly. Because she isn't supposed to be sleeping through a whole night like humans do but she forces herself to. I think that'd be funny.

[sukirichi]

i’m so normal about aiku haha

[keira-draws]

the williams siblings have been floating around in my brain all day

[moonlit-orchid]

Normal people: vent about their feelings in a diary or blog post

Me: makes a whole ass zine at nearly midnight

[igneouswyvern]

I love swords so much. Swords that are 100% accurate to real swords. Swords that are mathematically and physically completely impossible. Slender, lightweight, agile rapiers. Giant, chunky, unwieldy, bludgeoning swords. Ancient swords that have been around since the dawn of time. Futuristic swords. Living swords. Swords that house and trap an entity. Swords that are in and of themselves alive. Swords that are made of an element. Swords that can harness the power of an element. Fire and lava swords. Water and ice swords. Wind and electric swords. Swords of darkness. Swords of light. Swords forged from the bloody hands of a human or other living being. Swords forged by nature. Swords that have been cared for and loved. Swords that have been abandoned to time. Swords forged for a purpose. Swords designed to save. Swords designed to kill. Nonconvential swords. Swords with another weapon attached. Swords with a mace on the end. Swords that are also hammers. Swords that are also spears. Swords that can function like guns. Swords that transform to suit the wielder. Swords with random holes in the middle. Swords with a special design on the hilt. Swords with a ribbon attached. Swords with magic contained in the hilt. Swords with extendable blades. Swords with a blade on each end. Swords that corrupt the wielder. Swords with a mind of their own. Swords that serve a higher power or purpose. Swords that guide one to a certain path. Swords that bond to their user. Swords so powerful that very few can wield them. Swords designed to be wielded by any. Swords that protect. Swords that have been passed around through wielders and owners. Swords that have not moved in ten thousand years. Swords of metal. Swords of stone. Swords of magic. Swords of energy. Swords.

[reverecurrent]

i rlly fucking hate not having something to do early in the morning whether it be class or work or errands or an appointment, doesn’t matter. i can almost always predict w certainty that i a. wont be able to get off my phone at night cause i get hyperactive mentally b. will wake up past 9am as a consequence which means i’ll stay in bed until noon or even 3pm like todays case and c. will have to order food cause i can’t bring myself to do anything because i get even more tired and will d. need more caffeine to readjust and e. be unproductive for most of the morning. like yeah it’s nice to sleep in once in a while cause i don’t get it often (and it’s true it’s probably once or twice a week that i do and now i’m on a 3 week break from school which is why i can) but i just get so mad when it happens.

[adw520]

cant sleep because i cant stop thinking about how the mechanic was a bit of an asshole to me for no reason when i got my car finally taken in

[yume-fanfare]

oh i love this line