#would've definitely liked to do more but oh well
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It Always Leads To You
joel miller x younger fem!reader
summary: it's been a year; now you're back. how can joel be so sure of those old summer feelings in your eyes when there's a new hand holding yours?
warnings: 18+ (minors dni), age gap, toxic relationship, cheating and infidelity themes, mutual pinning, kinda dark!joel, smut, p. in v., pussy pronouns, oral (f. receiving), fingering, manhandling, lowkey forced creampie, ANGST, the taylor swift evermore (2020) references go wild, happy ending cause y'all weak asses voted for it and i love to keep my citizens happy!
word count: 5,199 words
side note: my joel miller era is alive and breathing after this tlou re-watch i'm doing my brother swears it's for him but it's mostly me and my fic/womanly reasons, yes we love gaslight girlkeep girlbossing in here gotta say, finding inspiration for this amidst my wattpad duties and christmas movie marathon was harder than i thought lol. was it worth the wait? please like, comment and reblog to let me know! it's based on this request (they're still open btw!)
part: I / II
Holidays linger like bad perfume.
Your eyes wander through the streets: the roads you've got to call home, the ones where you grew up. They're familiar, but so foreign, it's hard to believe they're the same ones where you scrapped your knees at ten and kissed Joel just last winter. It's as if both timelines, your life, feels more like two separate lives, miles apart.
"Hey, you okay?" tender, from the driver's seat; you're still getting used to the soft.
There's a reassuring smile your way, his hand finding yours to give it a squeeze. You notice his palm is the same size as yours. It fits perfectly, but there's a ghost of what it feels like to have it all wrapped up, looming over your itchy palm like all the yearning's a joke.
You nod. "Just tired. That's all"
He sighs. "If I wanted you to lie to me, I would've just asked"
"I'm not lying" you defend yourself as his pickup truck parks on the sidewalk.
He makes a funny face, and you laugh.
"I'm serious, Nick" your lips purse, a thing you do when you lie, yet he still hadn't noticed, like Joel. "Don't worry"
He doesn't look that convinced, so you take off your seat belt and grab his hand.
"C'mon. Mom and dad must be waiting for us"
"Hey" Nick calls you out.
"Yeah?"
"Who lives there?" and he's pointing behind you.
It's his. Joel's house.
"A friend of my dad's" you answer, dryly.
It was last december when you stood there in his porch, begging. It feels like time has stopped ever since, and you're still right where he left you.
"So will he be here?" Nick asks. "You know, since he knows your dad"
"Don't think so" you shrug, "he's got better things to do anyway. Bitter old man" comes out, with more venom than intended.
"Oh! Alright, sorry for asking"
You come back to your senses, realizing you've shared more than you should.
"No, I'm sorry. It's not that important; let's just go inside"
Your mom and dad greet you as soon as you cross the door. Last year, you'd basically fled away before New Year's, with a poor excuse and a broken heart. They both greet you as if nothing happened, although you're sure they remember your tear streamed face coming back from Joel's house, where it all ended.
As your mom corners Nick with kisses and embarrassing questions, your dad whispers to you:
"Joel asked what happened" you quirk and eyebrow, "wanted to know why you left"
"Eh, it's not important" you try to dismiss. "Definitely not as important for a guy like Joel to know"
"What is that supposed to mean?" your dad inquires. You often wonder if they knew.
"Nothing" you laugh nervously. "Listen, why don't you go and meet Nick, yeah? Did you know he likes fishing too?"
The distraction works with your dad; the same can't be said about you.
There's conversation flowing, but through the snow covered window, your eyes keep glancing back to his own. The view is dark, and you ponder if he's fled as well, the town plagued with memories too painful to reminisce.
You can still feel his hands roaming your body, the lust filled gaze that hid warmth. Every time he touches you, you have to remind you he isn't there: that the lips that kiss you, don't taste like his, that the hands that hold you, aren't big as his, and that the face that looks at you like they'll never choose another, is one you haven't learned to love yet.
Joel's memory cuts like thorns: they sink their teeth into your heart, that bleeds with that blood-colored sadness you're all too familiar with. He's poisoned you. But-- isn't it his love also the antidote for this disease he's gave you?
You abruptly stand up, plate half eaten.
"I-I need some air"
It's cold outside, but you don't care. All you want to do is sit on the porch, and drop some tears, something you can do inside too, but the fear of your muffled cries being able to be heard stops you.
You walk towards the stairs, to sit there like you do on summer days, yet there's now a difference: the snow. So you end up slipping, falling with your butt on the floor.
You yelp, embarrased although no one can see you.
"Need help?"
That you're wrong, apparently.
You don't even need to raise your view to know who that voice belongs to: you know it like a record, spinning in circles on your head.
He offers his strong hand your way, and although the cold wind hits your face, you're back to spring on the cabin: wet feet, bright sun and beating heart.
"I can get up myself" you reject his help, pushing the hand out. You keep avoiding his gaze, so you don't see how he's reacted, yet you hope he feels bad about it.
You walk up to the front door, and it takes you a while to realize he hasn't left yet. On top of that, it seems like he's following you. Just what you needed.
"What are you doing here?" you question, but your tone sounds like you're offended.
"Your folks invited me over" Joel answers, "Says they got a special guest"
"Yeah" this time, you do look back, finding him to be much closer than you thought he'd be. Yet you stand tall, defiant even. "It's my boyfriend"
You savour the way his expression falters, before the stoic façade takes over again.
"Boyfriend?" Joel scoffs, as if you just told the funniest joke ever.
"Is that supposed to be funny?" you bite back. "What? Think a pretty girl can't get a new man?"
"Never said I'd doubt'it" he clicks his tongue. "Y'a could get any man you'd want, sugar"
Ironically, the only man you want stands before you.
"Right" you chuckle dryly, "I think it's kind of funny of you to say that"
Joel's eyes bore into yours, a clash of emotions circling in his chocolate orbs.
"Y/n-"
"Don't" you stop him. Then sigh, defeated. "Let's just go inside"
As soon as you both arrive on the dinning room, your parents both greet Joel. Then, they introduce him to their guest, just as promised.
"Joel, this is Nick, y/n's boyfriend" your father speaks. "Nick, this is Joel, a dear old friend of mine"
Nick, as the gentleman he is, offers his hand. Joel accepts, but you can see the barely desguised displease behind his eyes.
"Wow, strong grip" Nick comments before joking, "you can let go now, I'm not going anywhere"
The hidden meaning of his words, whether intentional or not, hit Joel in the face. It's obvious by the way he backtracks, letting go of Nick's hand.
As you sit again, Nick leans to your side and whispers.
"Is this the guy who lives in the house across the street?" you nod. "Thought you'd said he had better plans. But, see? I told you: no plan's more important than coming to your house"
He's always making jokes, trying to make you smile, but it's done the opposite now. The food has gone cold long ago, yet you cut through the meat with a violence so palpable, even your mom tells you to slow down.
The nerve of Joel, showing up to your house like it's nothing, talking to you like he's unaware of his spell on you, acting like Nick is some sort of competition when he pulled out of the race himself a winter ago.
"So, Nick. How did you two meet?" your mom adresses him, eager to know details.
"It was at a party, actually, through mutual friends. Not a very spectacular story, that I know. What's funny is, she asked me what hour it was. And what did I say?"
"He didn't answer my question. Instead, he said: For you, I'm available any hour" you answer.
Your parents laugh, but Joel remains quiet. You wonder what he's thinking.
"You know" looking at Nick while cutting the steamed vegetables a little too agressive, "y/n actually hates parties"
"Joel" you warn through gritted teeth.
"Really? I didn't know that!" Nick seems so genuine, Joel can't help but hate him. He looks at you, concerned "You didn't tell me"
You can't believe he would rat you out like that. The appropiate word isn't hate, and you don't know how to describe it, but parties aren't really your environment; if you can, you'd choose to be anywhere else.
He'll pay for that.
"Joel" you seethe, an ugly smile painted in your features, "did you know Nick knows how to fish?"
It's a direct jab at him. He feels stupid for letting you get to him. The inferiority complex towards some random guy he just met, years younger, is actually laughable.
"I like-" Nick wants to add on that.
"Well" Joel interrupts, looking at you. "You never taught me like ya' were s'pposed to"
"You never cared to learn" you reply, acidic.
He sips his drink, trying to hide the smirk that's formed on his lips. You can't shut up, and he loves you've stayed the same.
"That means I've got some classes to take" Joel leans back on his chair, relaxed like he's won this round. "Just tell me when"
The tension cuts like the storm that's just formed outside.
"You should stay over, Joel" your dad offers when he takes a peak at the climate, "it's too dangerous outside"
Joel seems indestructible, like not even a snow blizzard could pierce through the rough old man. But he agrees, much to your dismay.
It's probably midnight already, and all you've done is toss around the bed. Nick peacefully snores next to you, and you envy how easily he falls asleep. You've always find it hard to sleep, the nighttime plagued with too many loud thoughts that fill the silence.
You get up carefully, heading downstairs for some water. You sip with tranquility when a noise jolts you from your sit.
The wooden floor creaks, making you aware you're not alone anymore.
"Can't sleep?"
You don't answer, seeing his sturdy figure emerge from the shadows until the dim moonlight shines over his aging features. Silence settles in. Outside, the wind howls, bumping against the windows with violence, like your heart does now against your chest.
"Not much of a talker, are you?"
"There's nothing to talk" cuts your response through the thick tension, the air suddenly suffocating.
You take another sip, but the tremble of your hand doesn't go unnoticed by Miller.
"Right" Joel sits next to you, on the kitchen island. "Won't even look at me, sugar? You've got eyes" his voice drops, "use 'em"
"What are you doing, Joel?" you ask looking at him, tears threatening to spill, making your bright eyes shimmer with pain.
He gets up abruptly, like he's woken up from a trance. He's seen his own pain on your eyes, and he hates it.
"Joel?" you ask again, demanding but softly.
He can't answer. Instead, he leaves.
"Goodnight, y/n" voice raw, many emotions boiling, hidden on the inside. It hurts.
If you hadn't changed, Joel too stayed the same.
A goddamn coward.
Two days have passed since, and now it's Christmas Eve.
You kneel, putting the presents under the tree. Normally, your parents would have much more people around for the holidays, but thanks to the storm, it's just them, Nick, Joel and you.
"I'm gonna miss Mrs. Stone's cookies" you pout, "I wish she could be here"
"It's a big loss for tonight" your dad sighs. "Next time, yeah? Christmas will come again faster than you think"
You nod, still absent as he walks away.
"Hey" Joel pops up behind, seemingly from nowhere.
"Hey" you reply, voice laced with tiredness just at the sight of him. How will you manage to survive until New Year's? You have no idea, the task harder if he's staying in the same house as you are.
"Put this in there, will ya'?"
He hands you a box, neatly wrapped up. What stands out the most is the silver bow on top. Your stomach drops: it's your favorite color.
"Y-yeah" you stammer. When the present falls in your hands, you notice it looks like Joel did it himself.
"Didn't know you were capable of nice things" you whisper. There's no anger in your voice, only loss.
"I'm trying" is what he says, before leaving you alone. Until then, you realize he had been touching you, the skin where his hand was on your shoulder burning.
Dinner goes by swiftly, conversation flowing easily courtesy of Nick and your father, who both have in common the love for talking. It may be your brain messing with you, but his eyes never leave you, fixated on your every move, savoring when your lips open and take a bite; when you lick them afterwards, salt in your mouth he'd love to take off in a movement of his tongue. The ghost of your lips haunts him, cruelly playing with his yearning now that he's got you across the table. It's a few centimeters, really, but it feels like you're miles away: and it's his fault. You're no longer his, and he's reminded of it every time your boyfriend kisses what he once had.
Now it's time to open the presents, and you excitedly raise your hand to go first.
"Alright, sweetheart. You know I can't deny you anything" your father beams, "go ahead. Choose any present you'd like to open first"
Joel's eyes are on you, and you know he's desperately waiting for you to open his first. Maybe partly in courage, maybe partly in fear, but you choose Nick's first: something safe to start with.
"That's mine!" he chirps, and Joel mockingly imitates his kid-like joy under his breath.
You unwrap the present, finding a small box inside.
"Please, don't be another box" you joke, and he laughs.
"You think that low of me? Please"
You keep unwrapping and find a bag. The bag has a small tag that reads: Gotcha.
"Nick! God, you're so corny" you tease as you open the bag. Inside, there's a velvet box, and by the looks of it, you can tell it's jewelry. You gasp, pulling out a silver charm tied to a silver thin chain: it's a marlin fish. "Nick..."
"I know. Marlin isn't your favorite fish, but that's all I could find" you get up, wrapping him on a tight hug. Aware you've got an audience, he leans and whispers "I knew fishing was special to you, because of your dad and childhood. Maybe now" he takes it from your hands, carefully putting it around your neck, "it can also be our special thing"
Joel sees the scene unfold in front of him, his grip tight on the cloth of his jeans until it's white. His jaw clenches at the affection display; all he sees is red.
"What about that one?" your mom points out Joel's present. A pit of nerves forms in your stomach. "I don't remember seeing it there"
Before you can grab it, your dad moves faster, examining the box on his hands.
"It's Joel's" he makes a pause, "for y/n"
You pretend to be shocked, and you can tell Nick tenses at your side.
"You didn't tell me you were close"
"Used to" you correct quickly, despite the knot on your throat. "Not anymore"
"He still got you a present, though"
You don't get to answer because your dad leaves the box on your lap.
"Open it" it's soft but feels threathing for some reason, "I'm curious"
Joel's resting hands tremble as much as yours while you open the present. You reveal the simple white box under the wrap, opening it up.
Your voice comes out shaky as you call his name. And he can see it: the muffled laughters on the shed, the warmth of the cabin's fire, the fogged up windows of his car, the bruises on your tits and that voice, so vulnerable, he can see you on his porch, saying those three words that terrified him so much, his solution was breaking your heart.
"What is it?" your dad asks.
"It's a scarf" the fabric tickles your fingers that wander through the loose strands.
You remember it all too well.
"Oh, it's vintage!" your mom comments when she sees the worn-out aspect.
But just as your affair with Joel, you keep the secret of it's real owner.
"It's perfect" you mutter, remembering better times: ones where he'd wrap the scarf colored as the leaves on the ground around your neck, covering bruises he'd just made while you joked you'd steal it, and Joel would say he'd just let you, that it looked better on you anyway.
You've forgotten the good, so used to thinking of Joel at your worst, like a punishment to endure and sink your shipwreck even deeper. You felt lost, replaying memories that seemed stuck on a loop. Since last december, all you've known is pain; creeping up through the cracks in your fleeting happiness, one you've tried to find to no avail. One day, past the curses and cries, maybe there'll be happiness. But as for now, that day seems terribly far.
As he sees your teary gaze, Joel often wonders were it went wrong. When did hurt was all you had for him in that gaze of yours he can't bare to look that long, not before he's reliving all those seasons by your side, replaying his footsteps on the snow, grass, water and fallen leaves, trying to find the one where it all went wrong. The torture he now wears like a second skin, his agony painted words addressed to the fire of a house that feels so empty and alone.
"We should continue" your dad speaks over the silence, "there are still many presents left"
The night moves slowly, and the scarf you've chosen to wear is now suffocating around your neck. But you can't take it off. This is the closest you've been to Joel on a year; it still smells like him. As the presents run out, you excuse yourself early to bed, only to wake up again in the middle of the night. You want to pee, so you exit your room and walk to the bathroom, your bare feet against the cold wood sending shivers down your spine that only seem to augment when you walk past his door, next to the bathroom. After being done, you splash some water on your face, as if that would make some sense get to you.
"What are you doing?" you ask yourself in the mirror. Your tired reflection stares back at you, in silence.
You open the door, ready to go back to bed when a hand covers your mouth and shoves you inside.
"Don't scream" your cries go muffled against his hand, the calloused digits pressing against your soft skin, "wanna wake 'em up?"
You shake your head, so he lets your mouth free.
"Joel" you call out, but he's facing the door, his back all you see. No sound can be heard, aside from his uneven breaths.
"I'm sorry" he says, and then you hear the small click of the door's lock.
"What the hell?"
This time, he faces you, but his movements are so quick you don't register his lips on yours until it's too late. He kisses you like a starved man who hasn't had a meal in years, eating you out while your body acts up on it's own, the urgency embarrasing even.
"No" you pull back. Your mind screams in guilt at how much you want this, and that's all you can hear aside from his ragged breaths.
"No?"
"It isn't fair"
"To lover boy out there?" he teases, "I know he ain't treating you right, or ya' wouldn't look me the way ya' do"
"Don't, Joel" your tone is icy, "Nick treats me better than you ever could"
He laughs, darkly. "You know I ain't meant that" he corners you against the sink, the material cold against your bare legs; you don't sleep with nothing but an oversized t-shirt, despite the weather.
"Riddle me this, sugar: if he treats you so well, why are you so fucking wet?"
Your heart beats so fast you fear you'll die. He gets closer, his hot breathe prickling against your ear.
"It takes a man to please a woman" he tucks a loose strand behind your ear, "and I ain't leaving my baby displeased"
His fingers pull down the panties until your clit is exposed.
"Look at 'er" he traces a teasing finger over the puffy skin, coated on your slick "missed me, didn't she? Gonna treat 'er so good, she won't ever feel lonely again"
He softly kisses your neck, the trepidation and regret tying your stomach in knots.
Joel teases your needy core with his finger.
"Tell you somethin', sugar" Joel finds it hard to hide his adoration, "I missed 'er too"
He stares into your eyes while pushing two rough fingers inside your cunt. You bite your lip, holding back your moans.
"Need summ help?" he kisses you roughly, smirking when he feels your shaky breath against his lips. He pushes them in and out faster, making your walls squeeze tightly around his fingers.
"Did he ever have you comin' this fast? I'ont think so" he whispers against your neck. You whisper his name through labored breaths, making a smug smile adorn his features. "Good girl"
He proceeds to kneel down, despite the creak of his bones. You see him leave a trail of kisses down your thighs, your legs opening wider in response. His tongue gives rapid flickers against your sensitive bud, aware of the lack of time. He slurps the pulsing cunt, his head moving back and forth while he sucks, coating his moustache on your juices. Joel goes back to the quick movements, tongue knowing your spots and twisting fingers as aid, causing your back to arch.
"Fuck" you curse as you come, gripping the sink a bit too tight.
Joel then pulls away and places his fingers coated in your arousal in his mouth and licks them. He sees the obscene display in the fogged mirror, satisfied.
"Goodnight, sugar" Joel bids goodbye like it's nothing, kissing your lips that taste like you. "Still as sweet as ever"
It's New Year's Eve.
"You're leaving?" you sound so sad, Joel can't help but scoff. In the end, he'd stayed long after the storm had passed, your father arguing holidays weren't meant to be spent alone. So he stayed.
And now, Nick is leaving.
"I'm sorry" he apologizes for the millionth time, "but granny is sick. I don't know if she'll make it another year, so say the doctors. I would love to stay, really, but I have to be with her"
You understand, having lost your grandad years ago. But that doesn't mean you're okay with it: Nick leaving means a clear path for Joel, who didn't stop with him sleeping next room, and certainly won't now, despite not having interacted with you since he ate you out on the bathroom.
He pulls you into a long hug and a kiss that doesn't feel the same anymore. "Will you be okay?"
"Yeah" you nod, "I'll miss you though"
"Well, I'll be all yours when you get back"
You smile but it doesn't reach your eyes.
"See you, y/n. I love you"
Your lips purse after you utter those three words back.
Later at night, the house is filled with guests. The lively environment is restored, and you feel less confined to Joel's claws, so many faces to speak and distract yourself with, compared to Christmas and the past couple of days. You clutch the marlin charm tightly, mind busy wandering to places it shouldn't. Joel stares at you from across the room, eyes trained on you as he sips his drink calmly, like he's won; you don't know why he's keeping score if he already knows it. You wander off to the kitchen, and Joel follows you.
"You have to stop" you speak as soon as he enters, aware he would follow you.
"I ain't do shit"
You turn around, facing him. "Bullshit, Joel"
"Tell me, what'd I do?" he comes closer, and despite your erratic heart and fear, you stay still; challenging.
"You did this, Joel" his expression falters for a second, the weight of last december's crimes dawning on him. "Don't try to make me feel guilty"
"I ain't. That wasn't your fault" he sighs, breath dragging long like a cigarrette. "But this" he motions with his hands the reduced distance, "this it is"
Your breath hitches.
"We can't keep doing this, Joel. Nick doesn't deserve it"
He pins you against the counter with force, gripping the skin of your wrists until you're sure you'll get a bruise. Joel's eyes darken at the thought of your frail and soft body under his rough figure and belly, his strength and your weakness making the job of putting you under his will, so much easier.
"Don't say his name" he whispers, his breath laced with alcohol, "he ain't here anymore. Ain't nothing to stop me now, right, sugar?" Joel purrs as he steps towards you, taking your face in his hands before starting a heated kiss, making you stumble.
This was so wrong, but it felt so right, the missing pieces falling like dominoes.
He was your pain divine: you needed his hurt to bleed and feel alive again. Maybe the red of the blood and the blue of your sadness could paint your darkest grey skies with a happiness you've craved since you lost him.
"Tell me to stop" Joel whispers, tempting like a devil as he kisses down your neck, littering it with hickeys.
"Don't"
Next thing you know, you're excusing yourself upstairs and then Joel goes missing too, both inside of your bedroom.
Your dress was the first thing to go.
"Wear it for me?" you're about to answer, lips pursing, but he cuts you off, "and don't lie, sugar. Don't get too used to the bad girl schtick"
"I only wore this dress so you could take it off"
He kisses you desperately, legs wrapped around his waist while he carries you to bed, and the memories of your first flood you as he drops you down to your back, watching the way you bounce. He has you just like he wanted: moaning his name while he leaves tender kisses on the soft bare flesh.
"Joel-" you gasp. Despite the chatter downstairs and music, you try to remain low as he wraps his lips around your nipples. He then moves to your breasts, covering them with his kisses and hickeys. He hadn't touched a woman ever since you left, the feeling of the rosy innocent skin on his rough teeth making him loose all common sense, the real thing even better than what he would try to conjure when he fucked himself in the bathroom at the memory of you.
He groans when he feels your hands roaming over his back, nails digging on the scarred skin.
"Someone's eager" he teases, seeing your damp underwear. "Is this 'cause of me?" you don't answer, too busy removing the cloth, only for his strong fingers to grab you and stop you. "Don't be shy, answer baby. We got a whole new year, yeah?"
"I need you Joel" you whine, not laughing at the joke "cut the crap"
He pushes you gently back down to the bed. "So needy sugar, want me to help ya'?"
You eagerly nod, making him laugh. But there's no mock, only love behind the sound.
"Will you let this old man take care of ya', pretty baby? Just use your words, and I'll be all y'rs"
"Do it, Joel. Just do it"
You gasp as your folds begin to be prodded open by the fat head of Joel's cock. You curse, feeling him push in just the tip, the sweet burn of your walls welcoming his size making you grab his arms that stand at the sides of your body, caging you in.
His tummy pushes against your stomach as he adjusts himself, his weight sinking your body on the creaking matress.
"'S just the tip, ready for the whole thing?"
You needed him, all of him.
"Yes, Joel. I want you" You say and he pushes in slowly, feeling his cock fill up every empty space that craved for him.
You squeeze your eyes shut as his hips roll back pulling out about halfway before rocking back in. His sloppy thrusts pick up a familiar pace that makes you moan and beg for more, head falling against the sheets as his pace speds up until he's fucking you senseless.
Joel's brain goes blank at the sight of you creaming on his dick and the obscene sounds leaving your pretty mouth. Did he really give this up? He'd definitely go back in time and slap the fuck out of his past self, because there is simply nothing better than having you under him, screaming his name like that's all you can ever say.
"Does he fuck you like this, huh?" Joel angles his hips, resuming his brutal pace. Your body jolts with each snap. "Is he enough for you?"
"Yes" his stomach drops, dark eyes now hesitant, "but he isn't you"
He pushes himself back in, your eyes fluttering shut almost immediately.
"Tell me you'll leave him, y/n. Look me in the eyes and tell me who ya' really belong to"
Your eyes snap open at the possesiveness clashed with jealousy that drips from his sweat-soaked lips.
The confession falls easily, as meant to be. "Yours, Joel. Always was and will be"
He could cum just at the sight of your loving doe eyes.
Downstairs, the countdown begins, but in your room, all you can hear are his soft groans and your pathetic whimpers, and if the people would stop shouting, you could probably hear the squelch of your dripping cunt sucking in his girth with each thrust.
After a few more erratic thrusts, you feel his warm cum fill you up. Joel was always obsessed with how his cum seeped out of you and around his cock. Without thinking, his rough fingers push deep in you, making you yelp as he makes sure he isn't wasting a drop behind.
The countdown ends, and fireworks erupt outside as your head rests on the crook of his sweat covered neck.
"I love ya', sugar" those words you thought you imagined that one time, now real, so goddamn real his voice quivers and eyes get tearful with grief, "'S okay if ya' don't say it. I just wanted you to hear 'em. 'M just tired of wastin' my time"
He wraps your lips with his with tenderness you had only dreamed of. There is still a lot to talk and heal, but this time, his arms hold you like a promise. And you let yourself believe it.
Y/n's New Years' purposes: 1. Break up with Nick 2. Try to explain this seasonal mess to mom and dad 3. At last, try to be happy
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"a dream with you in it? that sounds more so like a nightmare..." he trails off, eyes widening as he shook his head. "you sure love talking about my cock though, you probably imagine it plumping into you, don't you?" and his cocky smirk is back across his features. he chuckles lightly at her insults, it not doing any damage to him. "oh, trust me i am well aware. . . i know how to please a woman, aspen. might be hard for you to believe considering you probably only hook up with idiots who don't know where your clit actually is." figures that she needed someone to actually show her what good sex was, maybe then she'd actually shut the hell up whenever they ran into one another. "oh, i'll definitely follow through.. wanna make people talk more and be my new years kiss?" mischievous smirk grows across his lips, sure it'll be the talk of 2025. digits sticks into his pockets as he leans against the wall, rolling his eyes. "if you wanted to stab me you would've done it by now."
"maybe in your dreams? you seem like the type to wake up hard and leaking after a steamy dream featuring me", femme preens with a grin. objectively speaking diego isn't a bad looking guy, he's handsome and probably knows his way around a woman's body decently well --- it's his personality that makes aspen want to grab a cheese grater and attack her own eyes. "oh i'm much more than a hole, diego. i have three — you might not be aware of that common feature all women have if you've spent time playing with dolls instead of real people", because if he can aim an insult aspen can return the favour and ensure she hits her mark. not making a habit of scratching bitchy slut's eyes out was a pretty proud accomplishment, there were just so many pathetic wannabes that ran their mouth's. "it can be, if you have the balls to follow through with it? actions speak louder than words after all." hues dip to the extended joint, debating for a split second before she reaches out to take it, swapping her lit cigarette to the other hand. "i mean i would do it, especially if you tell me i'm just a hole again", blonde remarks breezily, bringing the joint to her lips and inhaling. "one of those serrated knives too, they're the ones that really fuck somebody up, y'know?"
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Probably not a hot take from me, but...
Sonic The Hedgehog 3 is one of the best family films of 2024.
SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT
It's not a perfect adaptation of Sonic Adventure 2 by any means, but it cleans up a lot of the unessary stuff from the game.
Especially in regards to Maria and the ARK.
I LOVE that the Space Colony ARK doesn't exist in this movie. Because the movie knows it doesn't need it. All it needs to adapt is the research facility where Maria dies and the Eclipse Cannon.
Gerald Robotnik is an interesting character in the film for sure. He still has the same hatred he harbored for humanity in SA2, but with the added bonus of resentment for his grandson, Ivo because, in his own words...
"You're no Maria."
Gerald definitely is playing favorites, and I think it's abundantly clear why. He sees himself in Ivo, and it disgusts him. Whereas with Maria, he can only remember her innocence.
Speaking of Ivo, man, he's great. I mean, he's just all over the place in this film. He's good, he'd bad... and he sure as hell is funny. He and Stone are great, and I love how he finally admits his true thoughts about him during his sacrifice. Stone deserved to be validated for all the shit Ivo put him through over the years.
Now, I wanna move on to our meat and potatoes. Sonic and Shadow. They're phenomenal. Sonic is pretty much the same as he was in Sonic 2, with a little bit of added angst, which is due entirely to the film's themes about family, morality, and loss. Shadow is... jesus... he was amazing. He was everything I wanted him to be. Cool, dark, yet understanding. That being said, I wish they spent more time on Shadow dealing with the issue of what Maria wanted VS getting revenge on GUN with Gerald. I think extending Shadow's conversation with Gerald about their plan and Maria's wish would have done this perfectly and, in turn, better set up his switch to the good side so it's not as "oh yeah I guess we're doing this now."
"Live and Learn."
Okay, time for me to gush about Crush 40.
First of all, SEGA needs to pay Johnny G. what he's owed. Second...
HOLY FUCK
Live and Learn is everywhere in this thing. It's basically Shadow's theme for this film, playing in moments where he's either doing cool shit, or turning further to the light.
And when it played when Sonic and Shadow went Super on the fucking moon?! Oh my god, I would've screamed if it weren't for the fact I was in a public movie theater. You do NOT understand what this means for the next few films. We might actually get songs like "What I'm Made Of" or "His World" adapted for these movies if they keep doing well.
And I don't need a masters degree in Sonic-The-Hedgehogology to tell you how COOL that would be.
Speaking of Sonic, I wanna turn it back to talk about him and Tom. Dude. I love how Tom is immediately ready to join Sonic on his adventures. He loves this kid and wants to support him in any way he can, and I bet Sonic's so happy Tom wants to Hero with him.
"What did you do."
Tom's injury towards the end actually hurt me a bit. I didn't realize how much I cared about him until they played with the possibility of his death in this film. Also, I love what it meant to Sonic. We've seen in Sonic 2 that Sonic has some pent-up aggression for the echidna that killed Longclaw, that he never really properly expresses. The possibility of losing Tom, his best friend and father figure, the first person he connected with after years of isolation, it drives Sonic into a dark mindset. And. I. Love it.
This is what modern Sonic stories need. To give Sonic a wide variety of emotions, for him to act rashly if his closest friends and family are hurt, because it gives him more personality and shows us just how much he cares.
"What was his name...? Tom...?"
I loved everything about the scenes where Tom is hinted at being dead. I love how Shadow sees Sonic's reaction to Tom's potential death, and he has a small realization that he's become just like who he hated. I love watching Sonic panicking because he might be losing his best friend and father. I love how Maddie tries to keep a hold of herself for the sake of Team Sonic. I love the argument between Knuckles and Sonic about the use of the Master Emerald. I love the fight between Super Shadow and Super Sonic. I love how Shadow criticizes Sonic for letting his blind rage take over. I love how he wants Sonic to finish the job, and Sonic realizes what he's doing.
"The light shines, even though the star is gone..."
Sonic and Shadow's brief conversation on the moon is actually really sweet. They share a connection through their losses, and Sonic is able to guide Shadow to the light, by simply telling him to make the right choice. I think it's great because up until now, I think Shadow believed what he was doing WAS the right thing. But after seeing himself become like the GUN agents who ended up killing Maria... He starts to doubt himself. He goes to Gerald, who reassures him that what they're doing is justified, but Shadow doesn't believe that. Note how in that scene he asks if "this is what Maria would have wanted." Gerald responds by basically ignoring his question, saying that destroying earth is what deserves to happen to it. Gerald's own attitude led to his downfall. It's what caused Shadow to realize that he's on the wrong side of the fight by the time Sonic and him are on the moon, sulking.
"There are no winners with revenge."
I love this line from Sonic. It says so much about his past experiences from the last 2 films. He's seen revenge constantly ruin his life. So to be the one delivering it...? It goes against everything he's stood for, crosses a line he doesn't want to cross, and most importantly, sets him up for failure.
"Don't tell me you have a catchphrase.."
I like the comradery between Sonic and Shadow in the Super Hogs v GUN drones fight. They have a newfound understanding for each other that I think would have been able to make them better friends had it not been for Shadow's sacrifice, which will probably lead to the amnesia plot lines from Heroes and Shadow 05, which means it'll probably make Shadow a Sonic hater again. But then again, these movies keep surprising me, so who knows, maybe we won't go that route?
"What..? Who are you?"
Speaking of surprises.
FUCKING. METALIX.
And AMY MOTHERFUCKING ROSE.
Holy fuck. You all have no idea how hype this is. Unfortunately, I can say much in terms of predictions, but I think we'll be in for a treat come 2027.
#sonic the hedgehog#sonic 3 spoilers#sonic#sega#shadow the hedgehog#shadow#sonic movie#sonic movie 3
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Day 30: Deactivation
WOOOO squipril is finally over. Missed a lot more prompts than I would've liked but this was fun. Honestly just a nice reason to draw the squip again haha
#be more chill#bmc#squipril#squipril 2024#happi's art#tw eyestrain#would've definitely liked to do more but oh well#might tackle a few later down. just take inspo from the prompts lol#last week though was HELL. incredibly busy omfg#a shame though since i think there were quite a few fun prompts then#but yeah!!! good shit :)#hope yall enjoyed :)
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can't stop thinking abt how much my grandma would've loved toji.....
#she was a very bossy woman#but not in like a mmm rude way#she was just the head of the house yk?#she lived at the countryside and so there was always smth to do#i used to spend all of my summers and school holidays there with her#and every weekend when my parents and her son would come visit she just gave everybody a job lmao#oh wait so she wasn't technically my grandma she was my grandma's sister but . to me she still counted as a grandma okay#anyway#i think if yk she'd still be here and i were to take toji with me to there#they would get along very very well#bc i think toji would do everything she said without a question or a complaint#she was a big talker too so i just like to imagine him helping her out with whatever while she tells a story about whatever#and he is . listening#perhaps peeks at what i'm doing in the meanwhile but he's good okay#he's gonna be a good little worker hehehhee#(and i'm gonna be drooling for the entire time bc holy fuck he's like dirty now and he's sweating and he's being sooo so nice and mmmm sexy#and then for dinner we barbeque smth and he gets to show off his skills with the grill sahgdghsdhgsagdas#and then ofc we go to the sauna and then swimming#i would've loved to tell him stories about the place#and then we'd sleep in a bed that's just a bit too small but neither of us care#and i would whisper more stories bc i have sooo so many stories to tell abt the place and her#mmmmmmmmmmmmm#i miss her and i miss her place#it's still there like i still occasionally go and visit (her grandkid is taking care of it now) but it's not really the same anymore#anyway i think the morning would be sooo so lovely too we'd get coffee and she'd most definitely makes us pancakes and wahhh#i think this is one of the sweetest daydreams of mine#i think he would've loved it there a lot#despite all of the work#i think he would've loved it#miji
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Much better now, thank you! We've escaped Covid for four years now, but guess now it got us too. The exhaustion was wild, though 😮💨 I had more energy after childbirth. Wild 😂
Anyways, let's jump into this craziness 🤪👇
Oh no, Beau, don't do this. Don't push her away. Let her make up her own mind of who she wants to be with!
Sounds like Beau really came to the wrong conclusion in all his overthinking.
Yep, he was definitely wrong 🙈 And honestly, I think he knew it too. Subconsciously, Beau kind of ignored her feelings a little because he wanted to do the right thing so badly, not hurt his best friend etc. Plus, all the guilt and responsibility he carried for Randy's "death" played a role as well. I do believe Beau wouldn't have hesitated a second and fought for her if her husband had been any other guy on the planet 😂
But yeah, I felt like a part of him would've wanted to save his friendship with Randy too 🤷♀️
Carla was downright nice and welcoming for her standards lmao But ooof, the convo with Emily was hard to write, but I always felt like she'd fight for her dad and would want him to be happy ❤️🩹
😂😂 Donno. I read this hearing him saying that! So, in character, I love how you captured him!
Absolutely my favorite to write in this whole chapter! I wish I could've used him more because all his lines on the show were always gloriously hilarious 😂
Well, that discussion between Beau and Randy went about as well as expected.
Ikr? The fact they know each other so well probably doesn't help either lol
Randy's really pushing hard for an answer, isn't he?! At least this time, Beau could she how much she was struggling with the situation. I'm not surprised she said she picked neither of them after how Beau acted this morning, and Randy acted just then.
Randy definitely had some kind of a breakdown, but I still can't blame him in the least. It's one thing to hear about your best friend and (ex)wife(widow) and actually seeing all the gory details of it (thanks Diane!) 😅
And yes, luckily, Beau realized his good intentions went too far and he can't force her to feel a certain way...
In my head, she still picked Beau (because we already know her true feelings when she went after him the night before), but she didn't say it in the moment as not to hurt Randy more. She'd probably want him to be calmer for that conversation, knowing he'd need a little time to sit with it. Hurt people hurt people ❤️🩹
Yes Beau go find your girl!
Our sheriff did come around at the end ☺️🤍
Polaris – Chapter 10
Series Summary: When Beau Arlen moved to Montana, he left behind a past he wasn’t proud of. But when a series of murders requires the FBI’s help, Sheriff Arlen‘s ghosts come back to haunt him one by one. With a wrong turn waiting at every crossroads, it’s hard to make the right choices and find his way back home – back to you.
Pairing: Beau Arlen x FBI Agent!Reader
Warnings: 18+, angst, heartbreak, everyone being all over the place, one very tough conversation...
Word Count: 6.0k
A/N: Ooof, what a week! The whole fam came down with Covid and I was barely holding the fort down 😮💨 But in the midst of all the stress and chaos, all your kind comments brought me so much joy! I really appreciate you guys 🥹🤍
Series Masterlist || Main Masterlist || Tag List
Chapter 10: It Matters
Pick me. Don’t go.
Those words had pervaded Beau’s mind and tormented his heart all night. It had been a mistake to utter them. He should’ve never said them in the first place. They forced you into a corner, and he had never wanted to do that to you. He didn’t know if it was the alcohol in his bloodstream or the sheer love in his heart that drove him to say them, but he hated himself for his blatant selfishness.
How could he do that? What else were you supposed to say to him? Of course, you’d stay, even when Beau knew it was wrong.
You were still peacefully asleep next to him, unaware of the train wreck of thoughts that circled his mind in an endless loop. The smell of you lingered in the air and pulled him closer to you. Every fiber of his being wanted to make you his again, love you the way his muddled head had convinced him only he could. But he abstained, and it was the hardest thing he ever had to do. Leaving you always was.
“Hey, morning.” You stretched with a soft smile and glanced behind you at Beau. He lay awake next to you, forest green eyes opened wide and staring at the ceiling. Internally, you sighed at his brooding. You rolled onto your stomach and began kissing a path from his throat down to his chest, your fingers trailing his taut skin.
“Y/N, stop. Please, darlin’…”
With a deep sigh, you crossed your arms on top of his chest and rested your chin on them, looking up at him. His fingers brushed tenderly through your hair, but he still didn’t look at you.
“Talk to me. What’s going on in that pretty and rumbling head of yours?” you prompted softly and pecked his chest, just above his wildly beating heart.
“I can’t do this. We can’t do this…”
You lifted your head and found his eyes, forcing him to look at you. “You want me to go?”
His features hardened as he fought for an answer. After a moment, he shook his head. “No.”
But his actions contradicted his words. He rose from the bed and dragged a palm over his face and through his hair. His feet found solid ground, but his body remained anchored to the bed as if he was torn between leaving and staying with you.
“I shouldn’t have said those things last night. It wasn’t fair to you…” His head fell into his hands. “I don’t wanna force you to make a decision. I’m the wrong choice.”
You straightened behind him and stroked his back. “You’re not the wrong choice,” you insisted. “And if you don’t wanna make a decision for me, then maybe you shouldn’t push me away either.”
“I had no right to say those things to you, Y/N. I was drunk and emotional… I shoulda never let things get this far last night. I was being selfish,” he stated, and you could feel him pull away from you, like he’d done so many times before. It was an all too familiar pattern. “But I have my head on straight now,” he declared, the irony lost on him, but the determined and harsh tone of his voice shattered your heart. No one did it better than him. He made breaking your heart an art.
“Beau…”
“No!” he silenced you sharply. Your hand dropped from his shoulder. His face softened as he looked back at you. “You should be with him, Y/N. You’re just confused right now. I know once you’ve had some time to think about it, you’re gonna regret it, so I’m backing down, okay? Just take me outta the equation.”
Anger flared up inside of you and surged through your body. “Don’t ever fucking tell me how I feel,” you snapped. “You wanna be a coward again? Fine, consider yourself out. I’m leaving.”
March 2021
Beau’s head was a thundering earthquake as he left his motel room. The desert sun was stinging and blistering hot as he walked no more than two blocks down the street to the little plaza of food trucks. And plaza was a nice word for it, really. It was just a rundown parking lot, but the food was delicious nonetheless. God knows, with his punishing hangover, he craved something greasy and unhealthy.
Unfortunately, the fourteen tequilas had ironically not been enough to cause a total blackout – or maybe his body had just ejected them too soon. Either way, he remembered every embarrassing and shameful bit and piece of last night’s events. How he had pathetically sulked, how he had puked his goddam guts out in front of you, how you had still taken care of him and stood by his side, how he had audaciously hit on you – multiple times – and how you had angrily shot him down.
All of these glorious moments were saved on his hard drive, able to torment him for eternity.
It was already late morning, close to noon, but the whole team was gathered on a picnic table. Some were enjoying breakfast after a nightly stake-out, some were taking their lunch break or enjoying their day off. You sat between Cody and Jordan with an extraordinarily big cup of joe, both guys seemingly bringing their A-game in the flirting department. Beau rolled his eyes underneath his dark sunglasses and took a seat across from you. Judging by the sheer size of your coffee, he assumed you didn’t have the best night’s sleep either.
“Hey, mornin’,” Beau greeted the group with a tired nod. He noticed you shift in your seat and avoided looking at him like it was a challenge. It was safe to assume you were mad at him.
“Hey, Arlen.” Amused, Cody grinned at him with all his teeth. “Back so soon? Thought you were supposed to be gone the whole week. What, wife kick you out? You look like shit.”
One clumsy joke already hit bullseye, going straight to his sore point.
Beau only chuckled politely. “Nah, Carla just had a work thing, so…” he lied. He wasn’t ready to get into his whole divorce drama with all of the guys just now – not on so little sleep and such a major hangover. “Guess I chatted a little too much with Don Julio last night.”
The guys laughed and started to remember their own recent drinking escapades. But not you. You let out a small scoff and shook your head, jumping up from your seat.
“I’m gonna get a refill. You guys need anything?” They guys shook their heads at your question, and you sauntered back over to the coffee truck.
“I’m gonna grab somethin’ to eat, too. Excuse me.” Beau cleared his throat and got up as well, the group continuing to chat, unbothered.
He walked straight up to you, and if he had thought earlier he had only imagined your anger, he was damn sure now. You didn’t even try to hide it. Carla was the passive-aggressive type, but he remembered Randy had once referred to you as “sharp and direct like a knife,” which was definitely the case here. As soon as Beau approached you, you exhaled an exasperated sigh and rolled your eyes back.
“Look, can we talk?”
“I think you’ve done enough of that last night, gaucho,” you retorted, annoyed.
Beau pursed his lips. Alright, second try. “I get that you’re mad. You have every right to be. I just wanna apologize for the way I behaved.”
“Oh, I’m fine. I’m not mad,” you remarked wryly, shaking your head. You then belligerently met his gaze. “Refresh my memory, though. What exactly did you do again?”
Beau let out a deep exhale, frowning slightly. “You really gonna make me spell it out?”
“Yup.” Coolly, you took a sip of your coffee.
Beau sighed once more, scratching the back of his neck. “I’m sorry I was an ass last night.”
“And?”
“And… I’m sorry I hit on you,” he admitted ruefully.
You grinned victoriously but not any less furious. “There it is.” Grabbing your giant cup, you waltzed back over to the table, Beau quickly catching up with you before you had reached your destination and were within earshot again.
“Y/N, c’mon! I thought you’d forgive me once I said it,” he argued.
You snorted a scoff. “I never said that. ‘Sides, that apology was kinda half-assed.”
“Alright, what d’you want me to say, huh?” he prompted with an impatient huff.
“Hmm, I would’ve preferred, ‘I’m sorry I tried to use you as my rebound and fuck you last night after my wife left me, even though you’re the only friend I have,’” you fired sassily, watching his frown deepen. “How does that sound? Sound about right to you?”
“I did not try and use you as my rebound,” he shot back.
Your brow arched. “No? What was that then last night?”
“That was…” Beau couldn’t think of an answer, because he didn’t quite know himself what kind of devil had possessed him that night. But he did know even his drunken alter ego wouldn’t use you as a sheer rebound. However, he couldn’t very well say that now, could he? “I-I don’t know. Maybe you’re right.”
“Yeah, thought so…” With a disappointed scoff, you pushed past him and walked back to the group.
Since bolting out of Beau’s trailer in nothing more than an old tee and some mere sweatpants, with a pile full of random laundry in your hands, you hadn’t even inhaled your caffeine intake this morning yet. And God, you needed it, especially after getting dressed with miss-matched clothes in the backseat of your car in the parking lot of a Walmart. You knew this wasn’t rock bottom, but you were eerily sailing close to it.
You could’ve driven straight to the hospital and gotten your coffee there, but a part of you wanted to avoid Randy for as long as you could. That same part also felt incredibly guilty and like the worst person in the world for even thinking that.
Was it crazy you didn’t want to see Randy? You had missed, cried, and grieved this man for years, praying he’d come back to you. Now he had, your prayers answered, and all you could do was hide.
But no matter how hard you tried to force yourself to feel the same way, it wasn’t right anymore. The flutter in your heart was gone. The urge to touch and kiss him had disappeared. Holding his hand felt weird. Your conversations didn’t flow like they used to. He was once your best friend, but now he felt like a stranger.
Or maybe you were the strange one.
And maybe Beau was right, and all you needed was more time to get used to everything again. Start from scratch. Go on first dates and get to know one another again until strange would become familiar. Maybe you even owed it to Randy to try and give it a shot.
The thing was, though, you didn’t want to even try. Twenty-four hours ago, you’d been happy with your life exactly the way it was – as terrible as that made you sound.
But didn’t it matter how you felt?
Your search for coffee, distraction, and escapism led you to the Blue Fox Diner once again. And as it was a habit with small towns, you immediately ran into some familiar faces. This time, you met Carla and Emily there. The former was in a much better mood, even gifting you a smile.
“Morning, ladies. Seems like the need for coffee keeps us united, huh?” you quipped, but only Emily giggled a little.
Carla’s brow furrowed slightly, on the other hand. This time out of concern instead of anger. “Hey, uh… How-, uhm, how are you holding up?”
Realization instantly dawned on you – escapism was nothing but a sham. “Beau told you?”
“Yeah, but he just sent a quick text, saying Randy was alive and at the hospital. I guess I should be happy his communication skills are getting slightly better,” Carla joked wryly, earning her a small glare from her daughter. “But, uhm, I’ve tried calling him multiple times since then. He isn’t answering. Is everything alright? How’s he doing?”
“Uh, yeah, everything’s… well, not fine, but Beau’s… I honestly don’t know. He’s hanging in there? I-… He’s just taking it hard, I guess,” you replied in a stammer. You didn’t know what else to say. The whole thing was as messy as your answer.
“Yeah, okay.” Carla nodded, sighing. “I can’t believe Randy’s back and actually alive… I’m glad Beau has you, though. Watch out for him? And yourself?”
“Sure, yeah.” You swallowed harshly and forced a polite smile to your lips. How could you look out for him, though, if he kept pushing you away? If anyone knew what that was like, it was ironically Carla. “Hey, uh, can I ask you a legal question?”
“Sure. It’s about Randy, isn’t it?” Carla gave you a knowing smile. She’d always been the best lawyer you’d ever known for reasons exactly like this one. She could anticipate someone’s intentions from miles away.
“Yes, uhm… if your spouse comes back from the dead, are you still married?” Judging by Carla’s amused smile, she had somehow expected a weird question like that as well.
“Yeah, are you?” Emily repeated your question with a curiously inquiring look at her mother and a scrunched nose.
Carla chuckled a little. “No, once someone is declared dead, may that be true or not, a marriage cannot be reinstated,” she explained and then paused for a moment, pursing her lips. “However, you can always contest it in front of a judge. In rare circumstances like this, I’m sure there can be something done about it… if that’s what you want. Is it… what you want?”
Your mouth opened but couldn’t produce an answer. Was it what you wanted?
“Right. None of my business,” Carla said and raised her hands in surrender before she placed one gently on your shoulder. “Call if you need something. Anytime, okay?”
You nodded with an appreciative smile. “Thanks.”
“Come on, Em. Let’s go.” Carla gestured for her daughter to follow her outside, but the teenager stayed next to you.
“Can I talk to Aunt Y/N for a minute alone?”
Carla shot you a look, asking if it was okay. You gave a nod in return, telling her it was fine.
“Alright, but be quick. I don’t want you to be late for school,” Carla reminded her and strolled ahead to the car.
“What’s up, trailblazer?” You grinned at Emily and tried to keep it light, although you could tell by the look on her face that she was planning on the opposite.
“Don’t leave Dad,” she told you, her brown eyes pleading. She was giving you the full puppy dog look, and all you could think about was how much she resembled her father like this. “He’s finally happy and like the dad I used to know again. He was better when we moved here, but I could tell that he was missing you. And those last few weeks, he was smiling all the time and not just ‘cause of a bad joke he was proud of. Like, legit smiling. For real. It was kinda creepy. But he was happy. Really, really, really happy. Please don’t take that away from him.”
“Em…” You exhaled a deep sigh. What were you supposed to say to that? You were flattered she thought you had so much to do with her father’s wellbeing? “I-… I don’t wanna hurt your dad ‘cause I do love him. But there’s also Uncle Randy to think about. He’s your dad’s best friend, you know? Neither of us want to hurt him. And your dad’s–…” An ass sometimes. “–difficult. It’s complicated, okay? There’s a lot to think about.”
Emily nodded thoughtfully, but she seemed to understand. “I get it. I just don’t want him to be sad again and lose himself like he did back then.”
You squeezed her shoulder and looked at her deeply. “I promise you it’s never gonna be like last time again. Your dad knows that now, too.”
“I hope so…”
As Emily left the diner, you finally got back to your coffee. Apparently, it was an Arlen family trait to confront you with some heavy-hitters before your first drop of caffeine.
“Heard your husband is back from the dead. Is that true?”
A voice drew your attention to a man behind the counter with chin-length hair and a beard. “Donno, right?” The man nodded, and you replied, “Yeah, he is.”
“Is he a zombie?”
You pursed your lips and took a sip from your cup, wishing it contained whiskey at this point. “I don’t think so, no.”
“If he is, you need to smash his brain. Only way to kill ‘em,” Donno informed you helpfully.
“Thank you. I’ll keep that in mind,” you replied warily. If Beau hadn’t already filled you in on all things Donno, you would’ve thought the guy was insane. Well, maybe he still was.
“You’re welcome. I’m good at smashing brains. Just call if you need my help.” Donno gave you an oddly crooked smile. “Aren’t you dating the sheriff? Is that true?”
“Also true.”
Fucking small towns…
“Want to hear my vote?”
You exhaled a small sigh and sent him a tight-lipped smile. “Sure. Why not?” Might as well, right? Maybe you should make use of the gossipy small town charm altogether and start a Helena-wide poll.
“Sheriff Arlen once throat-punched me. He’s very strong. Good build. Like a warrior,” Donno noted. “He could probably kill a zombie. I’d pick him.”
“Well… I’ll take that into consideration. Thank you.”
“Again, you’re welcome.”
March 2021
Still hungover, Beau almost dozed off during the daily briefing in the meeting room of the task force’s headquarters in Mexico – all DEA owned. You sat next to him in your usual seat of the glass box but hadn’t spoken a word to him since this morning at the coffee cart, mindlessly drawing doodles on the edge of your notepad. Obviously, you were still fuming, and Beau didn’t know whether he should try to suffocate the flames or if the fire would eventually burn out on its own.
“Alright, next on the agenda,” Cody said and clapped his palms together as he stood in front of the whiteboard. He was a longtime DEA agent and their task force leader, couple years younger than Beau and probably what most would classify as Hemsworth good-looking. “We need to get everything ready before sending Y/N in with our contact in the cartel. She’s been preparing for the last few months, and if everything goes according to plan, which I hope it will, we can start the mission by the end of next week. Jordan’s also going in with her.”
Beau’s brow furrowed in confusion, his head whipping back and forth between you and their leader. “Whoa, send her in where?”
“Oh, uh, sorry. Forgot you’ve missed last week’s meeting, Arlen,” Cody said with a subtle jab. The others frowned upon him leaving sometimes, none of them having families back in Texas – or at least none that they cared about. “Y/N agreed to go in as a buyer, gather intel.”
Beau’s eyes widened and looked at you, but you still stubbornly averted your gaze. “I’m sorry, what?! Why her? Can’t someone else go in?”
That was the first time you looked at him then. Well, glared.
Cody scoffed disapprovingly. “We need a woman for this one, and if you haven’t noticed, she’s the only one, unless you suddenly grew a vagina, Arlen.”
“He definitely hasn’t,” you muttered in sing-song under your breath, referring to last night’s events. But Beau still heard you, sending you a narrowed glare.
“Our cartel target only makes deals with female buyers. Word on the street is, he likes to get a little… handsy sometimes,” Cody continued.
“Well, that’s comforting to know,” Beau huffed, green eyes then landing on you. “Why did you never tell me you were planning on going undercover?”
There was a moment of awkward silence spreading around the table, everyone’s curious eyes landing on you and Beau. You didn’t respond, however. You clearly had your reasons why you’d left that part out, considering the scene he was making right now.
Cody’s eyes squinted at your partner, his brow scrunching. “You got a problem with that, Arlen? ‘Cause you startin’ to piss me off,” he snapped. For the record, that was the exact moment Cody landed on Beau’s punch list. “Maybe you should have a little more faith in your colleagues, dipshit. Y/N’s got the most experience as a UC in narcotics out of all of us. There’s no doubt in my mind she can pull this off.”
The wink Cody sent you and the smile you gave in return almost set Beau off like an atom bomb, but he contained the explosion and only imploded. He gave a tight-lipped nod in understanding and averted his eyes to the yellow legal pad in front of him, strangling the pen in his grasp instead.
As the meeting ended and everyone filtered out of the glass box, Cody called him back, though. “Arlen, a word.”
You glanced at Beau, your eyes briefly meeting before you left the room as well and strolled back to your desk. You knew he was in for a lecture, having overstepped a line earlier, which wasn’t uncommon for him. But you couldn’t always come to his rescue and offer your own head on a silver platter in return.
“Yeah?” Beau wasn’t even a smidge apologetic in his demeanor. In fact, he was pretty much the opposite and stood his ground with his chin held high as he faced off with Cody.
“I don’t appreciate your little protests during our meetings,” Cody bit. “Look, I don’t care who you fuck in your free time, but keep your personal bullshit to yourself. It’s got no place on this team. You understand?”
Beau let out a humorless chuckle, hands balling into fists by his side. “I’m not sleeping with her.”
“Who the fuck are you tryin’ to fool, huh? Everyone knows you’re hanging out in her room every night. It’s a small motel,” Cody provoked with a mocking smirk.
“I’m her friend. I’m looking out for her,” Beau snarled through gritted teeth.
“Oh, unlike me? Are you insinuating I put my agents in danger? ‘Cause then we have an entirely different problem,” Cody barked, the muscles in his neck and arms tensing. “Maybe it’s best I partner up with her for a couple of weeks till you’ve cooled off enough, Arlen.”
Beau scoffed, laughing darkly. It was the last straw before he decided to throw his inhibitions out the window. “Oh, I’m sure you’d love that, wouldn’t you?”
Cody took a step closer and huffed, their faces only mere inches apart from one another. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I think you know.”
One corner of Cody’s lip twitched in amusement. “Let’s make one thing clear here. The only reason you’re down here is ‘cause Y/N vouched for you. If it were solely up to me, I would’ve never let your sorry, drunk ass come down here in the first place. My patience with you is slowly running out. One more strike and I’m sending you back home to the wifey, and you can kiss your side piece goodbye. Got it?” he threatened as the two men glowered at each other. “Now, get the fuck out of my office. You’re off duty for the next few days till you’ve got your head screwed back on straight.”
Clenching his jaw, Beau spun towards the door and furiously kicked a trash can on his way out.
Peeking his head inside Randy’s hospital room, Beau found you sitting by your husband’s bedside. He figured you had spent your day here and had given you till the late afternoon to catch up before he decided to check in on his old partner, too.
The two of you were chatting with smiles on your faces, although yours looked a bit sadder and more subdued than Randy’s. As both of you noticed Beau, the conversation halted. Randy sent him a smile, while your brow creased into the familiar angry pattern. If looks could kill, you were surely aiming your daggers at his heart.
“Hey.” Beau smiled hesitantly at you two and remained close to the door in case he needed to flee quickly. It was always good to have an exit strategy in mind.
“Hey, man.” Randy gave him a nod, his mood a little more dampened than the night before. “They’re letting me out today. No major injuries or head traumas, just a couple of bruises. I can go home later this evening.”
“That’s great. Glad you’re okay.” Beau forced a smile, guilt settling in his stomach that he couldn’t be happier for Randy. His best friend was alive and well. It should’ve been cause for celebration, and yet, he wanted to get stupidly drunk for a different reason.
Randy then looked at you, his brow slightly creasing. “Uh, babe, where’s home, by the way? Did you move to Montana, too?”
You giggled lightly. “Uh, no, I have an apartment in Texas.”
His brow furrowed a little more. “Apartment?”
“Oh, uh, yeah, I kinda sold the house,” you told him. “It’s just… after you were, uhm… gone, I couldn’t really stay there anymore. I’m sorry. But, uhm, you can stay at my place.”
For a little while, you thought but refrained from saying that part. What were you supposed to do? Kick him out after you sold his home? Instead, you made a mental note to ask Carla about the proceeds of the house as well. You still had enough left in your saving’s account that easily covered his share. And suddenly, it dawned on you that this began to feel like a divorce.
“Oh.” Randy was quiet for a moment before he sent you a small smile and squeezed your hand. “It’s alright. We can start over, okay?”
Randy was sweet and had tried to take everything you’ve told him so far in stride, but you could tell he began struggling a bit with all the changes. When you came by this morning, he seemed less relaxed and more anxious than the night before.
“I guess, yeah.” You compelled a smile onto your face. You hated lying to him. You hated to pretend the two of you were just going to sail off into the sunset together. But you didn’t want to crush his heart. He’d always been good to you, making you wonder what was wrong with you for not wanting him back. But one look at the green-eyed sheriff by the door answered that question for you. “I-, uhm, I’ll check with the nurse about your discharge and get a coffee refill. I’ll be back soon, okay?”
“Yeah, sure, sweetheart.” Randy gave you a nod and watched you leave, brushing past Beau on your way out.
Beau shared a brief look with you, checking if you were okay, and then rested his palms on the rail of the bed’s footboard. He tried to seem as natural as possible in a situation like this. “So, how are ya holdin’ up?”
“Uh, good, I guess,” Randy replied with a little sigh, his hazel eyes still transfixed on the door where you had walked through.
“Now, that doesn’t sound like the Randy I know,” Beau noted half-jokingly, although he knew what was on his friend’s mind. The same thing that was on his – you.
“Yeah, guess we’re all a little different now, huh?” Randy mumbled pensively. “She seems… distant.”
“Uhm, just give her time, okay? Was a lot on her, too,” Beau said, but he wasn’t sure time was the answer. He could see you struggling as soon as he had strolled into the room, trying your hardest to uphold a crumbling façade.
He started to slowly regret this morning’s decision. One day without you already felt like hell. How was he supposed to survive the rest of his life?
“You two have gotten close, huh?”
Randy’s question was a lightning bolt to Beau’s chest, jolting him awake. He swallowed subtly, thinking about his answer. “Uh, yeah, a little… We’ve spent some time together when we worked on that task force in Mexico.”
“Well, I’m glad she had you. Thanks for taking care of her,” Randy said, smiling, but it didn’t reach his eyes.
“Uh, yeah, sure.” Adding ‘You would’ve done the same thing’ didn’t seem right in this instance, however.
“You-, uh, you know if she’s seeing anyone?”
The question whipped the air from Beau’s lungs and stole the ground beneath his boots. If Randy was aiming to give him a coronary this afternoon, he was succeeding. “I-, uhm, I’m not sure. Not that I know of, but I don’t think it’s anything you need to worry about.”
That was a good answer, right? And it was sort of the truth. Even if it was killing everything inside of him, he’d stick to the words he’d said to you this morning – he was bowing out of the race. In fact, he considered himself never even been in the race in the first place. Randy didn't have competition. End of discussion.
But Randy didn’t seem to think so, apparently. He scoffed a humorless chuckle and licked his lips. “You two are good liars. I’ll give you that.”
Beau’s green eyes widened. He could guess where this was going, but he knew for certain you hadn’t told Randy. That whole thing screamed psychotic witch, and he only knew one person who fit that ammo – currently locked up in a holding cell at the station.
“Randy, I don’t know what you think, but–”
Randy’s laugh of disbelief interrupted his sorry excuse of a deflection, however. “You really wanna tell me there’s nothing going on between you two? Really? That’s how you wanna play this? I think you owe me a little more than that.”
Beau nodded and rubbed his mouth with his palm. “Yeah, you’re right. I do owe you more than that.”
“So, it’s true?”
Beau swallowed down the thick lump in his throat and met his former partner’s eyes. “Yes. How did you find out?”
“That crazy psycho lady told me,” Randy said and confirmed Beau’s theory, the tears brimming in his brown eyes as he spoke. “I didn’t wanna believe it at first, because, well, it’s you and… her. So then, she showed me a video. Was pretty convincing... But me being a fucking idiot, I still didn't quite buy it, you know? Well, till I saw you two yesterday. Couldn't have been more obvious...”
Beau squeezed his eyes shut for a moment as the words sank in, but then his brow furrowed, something heavy falling into his gut. “What-, uh, what video?”
“I guess if I had to describe it, I’d say it showed you fucking my wife on a desk,” Randy said bluntly and almost hysterically laughed at the outlandishness of it all. “I’d check my office for cameras if I were you, by the way.”
Beau was shocked into silence, muscles frozen in place. He would’ve told Randy eventually, when things had settled enough and the two of you had decided together it was time. But he should’ve known Diane wouldn’t go down quietly and just float to prison. She took pleasure out of torture.
“Speechless, wow.” Randy whistled in mock. He was seething, clearly having held onto his anger for a while now. “How long till you moved in on her, huh? Was my empty casket even in the ground yet?”
“Look, it wasn’t like that,” Beau defended the unwarranted accusation, feeling his own anger start to simmer as well. Even if Randy was angry, he should know better than that. Their friendship had meant something once, and Beau would’ve never betrayed it like that if Randy had been alive and still around.
“So, in your office, that was a one time slip-up?” Randy lifted a brow, and for a moment, Beau could see a sliver of hope in his brown eyes. If it had just been a one-time thing in the heat of the moment, something that could be forgotten and discarded once it turned cold, he would’ve been able to forgive both of you.
But Beau couldn’t lie to him any longer. “No,” he stated earnestly. “We’ve been datin’ on and off for about two years now. First time ‘round, we’ve been together for a little over twelve months before we broke things off. We didn’t see each other for almost a year when I moved here, but we’ve, uhm, recently rekindled things, as people might say. But we waited more than a year after your funeral. There was nothin’ rushed about it, alright?”
Randy scoffed bitterly. “Wow, a whole year, huh? Glad I have a friend like you.”
“Randy–” Beau sighed deeply and ran a palm over his face.
“What, huh? You’re gonna tell me you’re fucking sorry?”
Thoughtfully, Beau pursed his lips for a heartbeat but then shook his head. “No,” he stated firmly, Randy’s brow raising in surprise. “Look, I am sorry that I hurt you, but I’m not sorry for what happened between me and Y/N. I love her.”
Randy's gaze drifted out the window as he ground his jaw. It was tensely silent for a moment. “Does she love you?”
Hesitantly and unsurely, Beau still nodded. “I think so, yeah.” At his response, Randy scoffed in incredulity. “But look, like I said, you got nothin’ to worry about. I already told Y/N I’m out. I’m backing down, alright? She’s all yours, man.”
“She’s always been mine,” Randy gritted. “And thanks for your fucking charity. What a hero! But I don’t need it, you got it? I want her to make the decision. I don’t want her to fucking pick me by default ‘cause y’all feel sorry for me.”
“I don’t think that’s such a good idea, Randy,” Beau warned cautiously.
“What, why? You actually think she’s gonna pick you over me?” Randy snorted a mocking chuckle. “I’m her husband. You’re the fucking rebound. You’re the guy that just happened to be there when she was fucking sad and then took advantage of her.”
“I’m cuttin’ you a lot of slack here, but you better take that back,” Beau snarled with flaring nostrils.
“Or what? You gonna punch me? Leave me to die again? Fuck my wife?” Randy challenged. “News flash – you’ve already done your worst… It’s true, though. You’re the fucking second choice. She’s never gonna pick you!”
“She already did!” Beau yelled explosively and bit his tongue immediately after, watching Randy’s face fall.
“What’s going on here?”
The men’s eyes fell on you as you appeared in the room and blinked at them in confusion. You had overheard parts of their conversation since both of them shouted so loudly it echoed all the way back to the nurses’ station.
“He knows,” Beau informed you quietly and shared a sideways look with you. “Diane told him.”
“Uh…” You stumped, your mouth falling open. Another part of you, though, scolded you for not anticipating this. This had been Diane’s real ace, hadn’t it? Bringing Randy back from the dead was just a small part of it.
“You need to make a choice, Y/N,” Randy demanded, his features stern. In all the years you'd known him and been married to him, you'd never seen him this upset.
“Randy, just leave her alone. Now’s not the time,” Beau argued firmly.
“Yes, now’s the time,” Randy insisted, his brow knitting into even more furious creases. “What are you now, her white knight?”
“Would you shut the fuck up already?”
“Would you shut the fuck up? I’m tryna talk to my wife here!”
“You’re not her fucking husband anymore!”
“Well, you’re not her fucking boyfriend!” Randy yelled snappily and then looked at you again. “Who’s it gonna be, huh? Me or him?”
“For fuck’s sake, Randy! Stop pressuring her and give her a fucking moment!”
“Oh, I forgot! You know her so well now!”
“A blind person can see she’s struggling, you self-centered ass!”
“I’m self-centered? What about you, you–”
“No one! I pick no one!” you shouted between their bickering, the two men finally falling silent. You looked at Randy with tears stinging your eyes. You could barely see the heartbreak and anger on his face through your blurred vision. “Are you fucking happy now?” Disappointedly, you gave a shrug of your shoulders and bolted out of the room.
“Are you happy? ‘Cause I damn well hope you are. Got your fucking decision, man,” Beau retorted.
“Fuck you.”
Beau only shook his head in response and scoffed, leaving the room in search of you.
It mattered how you felt.
Chapter 11: You With Me
Did that conversation go as you'd expected? I think even Carla is secretly voting for Beau 😂 Next week, Diane's back with more shenanigans... 👀
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Sizing chart of cute: One Size Fits All (Patreon)
#Doodles#Just Desserts#Villainsona#Spider Bites#Have some cutes to pull you up and out! Finally out from under the Big Bads!#One of the things I've been trying to more often is fullbodies - I default to busts soooo much#They're great for expression work! But they're samey and don't stretch me to work on anything below the chest#Fullbodies are good! I like seeing the whole of my characters! And luckily Charm is cute from head to toe so drawing all of her is fun :)#If anything I still struggle with her hair so the upper half of her is probably easier to cut off generally lol#1/3rd hair type design lol#I love her shoes sm ahhh she's so cute <3#Ballet-style pose! I finally added Princess Tutu to my breakfast anime and it was quite cute I enjoyed it :D#Definitely very much a fairytale - wish Ahiru had gotten a slightly happier ending!#I think it would've shaped me a lot at my formative first-anime-engagement age haha but I still enjoyed it as an adult :)#Lots of very pretty poses of course! Fun there as well#More Marshmallow Fluff and Wafer yayy <3 <3 They're the cutes#Love the themst#And the trio's pets again! I gotta give Lemon Squares a pet so I can have all my faves gathered in earnest lol#I think I was speculating about what pet she'd have recently.....a powdered sugar fawn? I can't recall#Oh I have her with a Canary in my notes that's extremely cute haha - she could do with a lemon drop bunny too! Gah too many cutes to choose#It's always that way with the pets haha - but for these three here they're all chatting in their sleep hehe <3#Chirping and yipping and baaing hehe the cutes! Love the lads#And a bonus spider bite and Spider Bites! Truly singular and double there that's funny lol#Worried little guy just a small and lonesome lad! Not very intimidating in singular haha#I wonder what their Battle form would look like hm :)#Couple'a Spider Bites checking in with herselves - one Charm was worried but being together makes it better!#They're cute wahh#Self-confidence self-assuredness better alone together - remember to rely on others too!
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Wait since when does James wear a glove
#James aish#beautiful boy#Carlton were mean to you Jimmy#i want to say he's copying Nat but no it was an elbow sleeve that Nat wore#nat drives James' car and finds a glove in the glove compartment and thinks he's having an affair with Travis Cloke#'jim when did you join Collingwood?'#'oh ah would've been around 2016' *nat does the maths* 'so you knew Travis cloke!'#'um yeah Nat everyone knows Travis Cloke he's---' 'a well respected member of the gay community?????'#nat starts fuming and worries he's losing his boyfriend to Travis cloke#'what does that big oaf have that i don't????' nat fumes#james comes home and there's several horses and donkeys in the kitchen#'nat??? did you leave the back door open again?' James calls out warily looking at the animals in his kitchen#nat comes running in to the kitchen 'oh i forgot to stir the soup' and#'babe there's donkeys in here' James says slowly and Nat flashes a grin 'yeah aren't they great we're having pumpkin soup your favourite'#'i haven't had pumpkin soup since Brisbane days when i was depressed eating cup a soups-- wait did you find my pocket profile from 2014???'#nat blushes and quickly throws a tea towels over his scrapbook of James Aish mementos#James starts leading the donkeys out of the kitchen and Nat's like 'wait Jim i thought you were into this thing'#'no definitely not' James retorts and takes the animals outside#he comes back and Nat's like 'babe i can't pack mark between three opponents any more I'm sorry'#James blinking confusedly 'i don't want you to do that you might get hurt'#'but...' nat says frowning 'what is it about Travis that you're into I've been racking my brain all day---'#'Travis?????' James said 'you mean coyler that tea drinking weasel who---'#Nat quickly pushes his cup of jasmine tea across the bench#'no babe i love you and your tea drinking i didn't mean it's just that Colyer-- he microwaves his tea'#'oh okay' Nat said 'yeah totally ok now back to Travis Cloke'#'Travis Cloke?????' james cries 'i haven't thought about him since i found that guernsey in your wardrobe signed by David---'#'i grew up a tigs fan Jim'#'oh phew i thought you were cheating on me with David'#'is that why you tried to grow a moustache that week?'
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LET ME BE THE JUDGE OF THAT - T . NOTT
Mature Content Ahead
Theodore Nott x Fem!Reader
Summary: You and Enzo are best friend, you have a bi-weekly gossip session at the astronomy tower during your bi-weekly smoke break. During said gossip, Enzo drops some juicy goss about a certain slytherin boy and how he's 'packing', iygwim ;)
Warnings: SMUT, Switch Theo and Reader, Mentions of Smoking, Graphic descriptions of sex, Slight Male!Receiving Oral, Squirting
A/N: I apologise for any spelling mistakes or slightly off sentences. I did proof read but I am dyslexic with acrylics on so my spelling gets progressively worse.
Theodore Nott. The man he was. He was one of your friends, he was in the group of the original slytherins from day dot. You always harboured something towards him - you just didn't know if it was feelings or pure lust. The man was an absolute pantie dropper. He just got even hotter with puberty.
Though he wasn't as much as a whore as Mattheo, he definitely stuck his dick in a few things (stupid bitches). There were many rumours about him but no one knew it was real, no one kiss and told with him. For all you knew he could've been an absolute virgin. But one of the rumours was true, Enzo mentioned over your bi-weekly free period cig break in the Astronomy tower.
"Oh! I've got some goss for you" Enzo chuckled as he pointed his slender fingers at you. His cigarette perfectly slotted inbetween his index and middle.
"What?" You looked over at him intruiged, as you stayed sat against the railing of the tower, your feet dangling over the old cobble below.
"Theo" He smirked. If you were a dog your ears would've perked up. The way your body instantly sat up straight away as you looked over at him more alert than ever. Your hand paused infront of you, the cig butt burning out. "Its big" He winked.
"Oh fuck off 'Zo" You took a puff from your cig, letting it hit your throat before exhaling. "You're full of shit, I'm not sitting here and listening to you bullshit another stupid 'Big Dick of Hogwarts' again. Do you know I actually got with Adrien just to fucking see" You rolled your eyes.
Enzo laughed "Did you actually?!"
You nodded as you inhaled the smoke from your cigarette, flicking the end as ash fell from the tip. "Well embarassing too, was so turned off at the.. what 3 inches I had to work with, just walked out" You groaned.
Enzo snickered but collected himself. "I'm serious though, it's literally huge. He sent a picture to the lads groupchat-"
"Why?" You cut him off
"We wanted to compare dick sizes so we measure it against our DADA text books" Enzo shrugged.
"You lot are fucking stupid..." You shook your head. "But.. out of interest where abouts was it? Would you say centered with the authors name in the centre or? I know the book is 15 inches tall" You spoke, putting out your cig on the metal bar.
"Jesus fucking Christ you are a freak" Enzo laughed putting out his cigarette beside yours. "But it was to the title lettering"
You stood up in shock. "You're saying Theodore Nott has a 9 inch penis.."
"How do you know the size- Wait I'll just show you" He pulled his phone out of his pocket, pulling up the groupchat and showing you the picture. Now with Enzo, if you couldn't guess it by now, he was the male gay of the group - him and Pans representing the rainbow together. You all thought it would be Blaise he turns out he ended up hitting it off well with Luna Lovegood.
"No.. fucking way" You gripped the muggle phone as you stared at the picture. "This makes me want to fuck Theo even more 'Zo. I've been toying with the idea but fuck this solidifies it"
Enzo laughs "Well he's been having a 'dry spell at the moment' said he can't get it up because of an 'inconsistency' he said but he won't tell anyone. Sounds like he's seen something that'll only make him hard".
"Inconsistency? Pfft, I'll be the judge of that" You smirked.
"Oh I bet you will" He snickered.
"Jesus, this cig break was crazy" You laughed, giving Enzo his phone back and the two of you walked down the steps of the tower.
"I'll update you if I hear anything more from Mr 9 inches" Enzo winks.
You shook your head bidding him a goodbye.
Later that day, You made your way into the dungeons, walking to Enzo's dorm to tell him about the crazy fight between Astoria and a random Ravenclaw over Draco.
"Zo you'll never fucking believe it. Astoria ate shit today and got her ass handed to by a Raven...claw-" You flung open the door, looking up and locking eyes to chest with a very naked, towel covered sadly, Theo.
"My eyes are up here bella" He smirked.
You gawked at him, shocked to see him, especially how chiseled he was... as your mouth practically salivated at the sight of him.
"Bella?" Theo chuckled at your frozen figure.
"Respectfully Theo, I've always found you so fucking hot. But now I'm going to have to definitely suck you off" You smirked up at him.
He snickered as he gazed at you. His tongue running across his bottom lip before biting it. "You really dont play around... Come on then"
You slammed the door behind you as you lunged yourself at Theo, crashing your lips onto his. His hands roaming your body as your slid from his shoulders to his damp chest. Your fingers working through the crevasses slowly.
"My.. my.. So eager" He laughed as you pushed him back against a bed while yanking at the towel watching as he caught himself with his hands on the bed, sitting up as he supported himself completely naked.
You bit your lip as you dropped to your knees. "Fuck.. Enzo wasn't lying" You placed your hands on his thighs.
"What?" Theo froze.
"Enzo showed me your dick pic.. Its even bigger in person though" You bit your lip.
"Fucking Enzo.. So you saw my cock and now wanna suck it because of a picture?"
"Yeah pretty much" You licked a stripe up the base of his shafts to the tip as you peered up at him smirking as he let out a shaky gasp.
"You are a weird one Y/N.. Now hurry up before I fuck your face with it" He groaned slightly agitated at being teased.
"He also said about your inconsistency to get it up Nott.. you seem to not be having an issue" You smirked as you took his length into your hands as you jerked him off slightly as you kissed up his pelvis.
"Don't act so suprised bella.. We both know it was because of you and that cheeky thong of yours. Why'd you think that was OK?" Theo sighed as he bit his lip peering down at you.
"Me?" You questioned.
You peered outside your door, looking left and right before slithering out. You really wanted to grab some water from the kitchen but it was so late and you couldn't be asked to wait till breakfast.
You snuck out the common room, running down to the kitchen, grabbing a glass of water but also stealing a few biscuits while you were at it.
You had successfully made it back to the common room, slowly walking down the stairs before turning to walk up the stairs to your dorm. You felt a presence near you but you, looked around and saw no one. So you shrugged it off.
Third POV
"Fuck-" Theo hissed as he flicked his cigarette out the window as he stared at your figure stood at the end of the stairs.
The way you stood in your little black knee high socks, paired with an absolute ravishing black lace thong - leaving nothing to Theo's imagination. Not only that, a tiny crop top with underboov practically spilling out. Theodore was spoilt by this view. He noticed you didn't notice him as you crept back upstairs. The growing tent in his joggers as he stood up to readjust but ending up moaning at the slight friction of the fabric.
What you didn't know, is that night Theo went and jacked off 6 times thinking about you. He'd never came so much, let alone been so weak for anyone. You were all he could think about for weeks. Even when he came to the situation of fucking a random ass Ravenclaw after a party, he couldn't get it up. It wasn't until he thought about that night. You. He could. He ended up ploughing the fuck out of that poor Ravenclaw imaging the girl was you. After that he vowed to celibacy until he could get his hands on you.
"What are you talking about" You laughed as you kitten licked his tip, staring up at him as he fought back his moans. His fists whitening as he clenched then tightly.
"I.. saw you" He gulped, submitting and sitting on the bed as you shuffled closer. "Two weeks ago- You went somewhere I don't fucking know. But you were in a tiny fucking thong and- there was just so much boob and ass.." You tilted your head as you stared at him. "Y/N- I fucked my shit so hard- I fucked a random bitch- I nearly fucking moaned your name" He was pratically begging for you at this point.
You stood up, straddling his hips as you smirked at him, caressing his cheek. "I'm flattered Nott, if you wanted to fuck me you should've just asked" You bit your lip.
"God- S'bad.. I want you so bad Y/N" He pratically whimpered as his cock twitches up against your thigh.
"Who knew Theodore Nott was a begger.. especially with all this" You chuckled, running your hand up his whole length. You lifted your thong to the side as you lined up his dick with your entrance as you slowly sank down on it. Sighing softly as the poor boy whimpered under you.
"Good boy" You cooed, ruffling his hair as you slowly rocked your hips back and forth, biting your lip at the feeling of his dick moving inside of you, hitting your G-spot every. fucking. time.
"I fucking hate.. how weak you make me" He whines, a soft pout upon his lips as his hands grasp at your clothed breasts through your uniform.
You capture his lips, kissing him softly, speaking between the breaths- "You're so.. fucking.. hot.." You sighed as you arched your back, throwing your head back as you gripped his shoulders as you sped up the pace as you rode him. Your hips buckling against his chest as you left out soft whines and moans. Supporting yourself by your arms but you were growing weak. As much as it was hot to see a submissive Theodore, his dick was perfectly hitting your G-spot every fucking time that you were crumbling.
You threw your head forward, looking at Theo as you panted, your mouth open agape as you stared down at him. Lust in your eyes. "Ruin me Nott" you gagged out.
It was like a code word or something. In that moment, Theo pulled out and flipped you over. Ripping off your uniform but leaving your tie on. Slapping your ass harshly as he theusted his dick back into you, tugging on your tie, choking you slightly as he began to piston into you from behind. You gasped, a moan catching in your throat as your head leaned back slightly at the tug of the tie as you felt Theo's hand grip at your neck tightly as you gasped.
"Good girl.. Be good for me.. principessa" He whispered lowly as he let go of your tie, wrapping an arm around your waist as he yanked you up, leaning your back against his chest. You moaned lightly, gritting your teeth as his dick absolutely crushed your insides. His lips upon your neck, biting and sucking on the skin, as his free hand gripped your left breast.
"Fuck!" You whined out as you gasped. The overwhelming feeling of his dick and his touch was driving you insane. "I'm co-" You screamed out as he sped up his thrusts. You gripped his thighs, digging your nails into them as you screamed out. Your eyes rolling back as you let out a low groan as you came harshly against his dick.
Theo let go of you, letting you fall forward against the bed as you panted heavily, breath shaky as you gripped at the sheets below you. His dick still in you as he stared down at your twitching body.
"I'm not done yet, amore mio" He smirked, slapping your ass as he pulled out. Flipping you over as he leaned over kissing you softly. Your arms snaked around his neck, pulling his closer as you sucked on tongue as he gasped feeling him enter you once again.
"Theo- I don't think I can take anymore" You panted, giggling softly, slightly scared.
"You will" He smiled at you, kissing your cheek as he slowly dragged himself in and out of you. "I need to cum too, and you need to come atleast 2 more times" He winked.
His lips captured yours as he kissed you passionately. You wrapped your arms around his neck, your hand finding it's way through his curls as you tugged on them with each pummel into your G-spot. Theo definitely knew how to use all inches of his deadly weapon. You did question why you left it so long.
He pulled away, peppering kisses down your jaw, neck and collarbone, nibbling and sucking lightly occasionally scattering hickies and marks. "So. Beautiful" He growled as he grit his teeth. His grip on the headboard directly above you tightened as he thrusted harder onto you.
"T-Theo" you yelped, scratching down his back harshly with your sharp acrylics. Gasping as he cocked his leg up slightly hitting into you at a tilted angle driving you insane.
"Doing so good, darling. You look so beautiful" He pecked your lips as his grip tightened on his bed frame, thrusting faster as the bed below the pair of you began to creak with each movement. "Good girl.. You are doing so well" He kissed your cheek softly as you let out a soft string of moans.
Your eyes rolled back slightly as your panting became erratic, your toes curling as you shrieked, digging your nails further into his back. "Fuck! Fuckfuckfuckfuck- I'm cumming!" You screamed out as you arched your back, your legs twitching as Theo continued to relentlessly pound into you, showing no remorse for your sensitive state. You yelped loudly, throwing your head forward, locking eyes with him as the knot harshly unwrapped in your stomach as you came harshly against him. He continues to fuck you through your high causing you to squirt. Everywhere.
You threw your head back, squinting your eyes as you gritted your teeth whining as your hands fell from his back to the sheets as you fisted them. It took you a moment to come round, you were seeing white during your high. You noticed Theo slow down, but still continuing to slowly pump into you. You felt his hand caress your cheek as he chuckled softly.
"You alright bella? Thought I lost you there" He smirked softly as he kissed your forehead.
You looked up at him, panting softly, pulling his neck as you placed a soft kiss on his lips. "You're going to kill me Nott.. How have you still not came-" You groaned.
He laughed, hooking his arms under your thighs, he lifted you up causing you to shriek. The boy stood up, lowering you once against fully on his length. His hands gripping your ass as he thrusted into you. Your body recoiling against him as your skin slapped harshly against his.
"Fuck- There-" You gulped biting your lip as your hands gripped his shoulders.
"Love making you feel good.. I could make you cum all day, I don't care if i do too" You groaned, his jaw tensing as you noticed his dick twitch inside of you. He walked across the room, your body rebounding every thrust back into him as you whimpered lowly. He pushed you up against the door, his pace quickening once he leant u against it.
"Fuck yes! You're so tight for me bella, just for me-" He moaned softly into your ear as his face buried into your neck. Soft whimpers leaving his lips turning you on even more. Your hips bucked against him as you tightened your core as you began to lift yourself to bounce up and down. Soft moans leaving your lips as he bit at your neck, whining into your skin.
"M'close!-" He yelped, gulping as he kissed your roughly. You pulled him as close as you could as he continued to plough into you against the door. The pair of you gaining closer and closr to your releases. His thrusts progressively becoming more erratic.
Suddenly, Theo halted before he drop you to your feet, pulling out as you gasped at the sudden lack of pleasure. He pulls you to the bed again, pushing you face first down as he climbed ontop of you. You had no time to compute what was going on or question him. It all happened so fast. His legs eitherside yours trapping you down as he slaps your ass. A soft yelp leaving your lips as he spread your ass and thighs with his hand as he pushed back in. The boy was fucking mounting you like a horse.
He kisses your shoulder messily as he bites down on it, his thrusts becoming messy as you gripped at the sheets again. "Tell me if your- uncomftable" He groaned in your ear. His thrusts growing messier and messier as he sped up. His poor bed frame screaming for a break, constant creaking and slamming against the wall as you both moaned. You were worried for the dorm next door, the pair of you didn't think of a silencing charm.
His whimpering driving you over the edge as you screamed into the pillow. Theo knew you were close, he could feel it as you tightened around him.
The boy chased for his high along with you. You both letting out some rather unattractive groans and whines as you drew close together.
"Sei cosi' sexy" (You're so sexy) He groaned, nibbling at your shoulder as he continued to whimper softly in your ear. His pants become erratic as he continued to thrust into you, at a wildly animalistic pace. "Mio, tu sei mio..~" (Mine, you are mine..~) he whined out, pushing your hair aside as he sucked at your neck. His pants becoming gasps as his dick twitched inside of you. You had no clue what he was saying, but his Italian accent was making you even more wet.
"FUCK!-" you screamed as you sobbed into the pillow, biting the plush object as you harshly came against his thrusts as he sped up one last time, before delving deep inside of you, practically burying himself and his cum deep inside of you.
"Porca puttana, cosi' stretto! Tutto mio. Ti amo, cazzo-" (Holy shit, so tight! All mine. I fucking love you-) He groaned as he held himself above you, his arms shaking as he panted heavily. "Holy fuck.." He collected himself before pulling out and crashing beside you, pushing his hair out of his face.
The pair of you had a few minutes of silence, panting heavily and collecting yourself together.
You lifted your hair out of the pillow as you turned to look at his fucked out face beside you. You let out a soft snicker as you moved to cuddle him, putting your head on his chest.
Theo didn't know you knew a bit of Italian not much, but enough to know he just professed his love for you.
"Ti amo" You smiled up at him. His face shot to you, his eyes wide and his cheeks flushed.
"You understood?-" He gulped.
"Only slightly but, I love you too Theo" You kissed his cheek.
He shook his head, laying a soft kiss on your lips.
The two of you cuddled a bit longer before you retreated to the shower where you went another round. You don't know how you did it. Your legs certainly hate you at this point. He decided to leave some nasty bite marks and hickies on your thighs. He even drew blood a few times but that's something the two of you can toy with later...
Later you stumbled down the stairs in one of Theo's tshirts. Your hair very messy and skin peppered in hickies and bites from neck to thigh. Theo followed behind you.
You noticed your friends sat upon the couches in the common room.
You looked to Enzo "Can confirm it is definitely 9 inches" You both laughed as your friends look at you confused.
"Who-" Draco questioned before gasps came from them all as Theo walked downstairs, covered in scratch marks, bites and hickies as he stood behind you ruffling his hair in just his trackies.
"Oh my god" Pansy gawked.
If you enjoyed this fic and want to buy me a coffee, you can do so here!
#theodore nott x reader#theo nott x reader#theo nott smut#slytherin boys fanfiction#slytherin fanfiction#slytherin boys#theodore nott smut#harrypotter fanfiction#lorenzo zurzolo#angelfrombenethfics
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Wouldn’t it be funny if Reader shows just a tiny amount of happiness to any one of the batfam, and the next thing you know they try their best to make Reader to do it again.
Example:
Dick:Makes a silly joke
Reader: Actually smiles and laughs at it
Dick: gloats about it to the fam
The BatFam: practically on all fours chasing after Reader to try and make them laugh
Don’t stress out with your writings (btw love your ‘again & again’ series❤️)
Take your time and don’t forget to drink water🫶🫶🫶
laughter is the best medicine
ft. yan! dick grayson, jason todd, and damian wayne
— masterlist !
more beneath the cut ! fluff ? with a mix of yandereness is my thing hehe. i love this ask sm <3 you guys are being fed well today !!!
reblogs and interactions are encouraged and appreciated.
ugh they're the definition of giving someone an inch and they'll be taking a mile. it would especially be annoying if it were dick on the receiving end of the line. but even if he'd be the one you'd take most precaution to, don't underestimate just how much your opinion holds the most value in the family. so they'll most definitely gloat about their achievement of making you smile or hell, even leaning against their shoulder willingly calls for a celebration.
trust me when i say that living in a stuffy manor already sucks, and they don't exactly like seeing you sulk and merely rot in your bed all day. so like any loving family would do, they'll try their damn best to at least see a quirk of your mouth or that faint glimmer in your that dick oh-so enchantingly talk about.
so it comes to them in the form of a surprise that one day, when your oldest brother accidentally trips over one of your expensive novelty ballpen, instead of nearly shouting at him for breaking one of your favorites, it was the "oomph!" sound his throat makes and his wide eyes when his ass directly landed on the floor that makes you crack into small giggles.
if it weren't for his enhanced hearing, dick would've crossed out your laughter as a hallucination, a product of imagination, something entirely impossible to produce, but no.
he had proven himself wrong.
once he turns back at you, he sees the crinkle of your eyes and your palm trying to cover your shit eating grin. the plump of your cheeks are so accentuated that he forgets the initial embarrassment he feels in the first place, replaced with awe at just how artfully captivating his sibling looks; sitting by
it's like a painting, he wishes it was. he wishes tim would be quick enough to capture the succession of your smiles in the live camera feed.
all because he couldn't believe it. couldn't believe that his baby bird is laughing. they're laughing and they look so mirthful and full of life when doing so.
yes, you're laughing at him, at his stupidity for being unable to detect a mere ballpen despite being trained to locate every known obstacle in a field.
but fuck, he was already raised at a circus to fulfill the role of an acrobat who entertains the crowd. what more could it be if that means he could play the role of a clown for you, his baby bird worth more than a thousand lives, whose laughter is equivalent to the immense euphoria that is filling his entire being?
give him an inch and he'll take an entire mile.
the next day, you'd be greeted with... a lot of peculiar instances within your family. all of which you would laugh at because it's not typical that your family displays mistakes, and you feel a bit better about yourself when their imperfections seem to seep out of their being— or maybe it's just your thoughts eating you up again, because is it just you or did jason, tim, and even damian, manage to at least trigger a reaction out of you?
tim would accidentally end up drinking orange juice right after brushing his teeth. his cringing expression, choked gargling and immense spitting is enough to guarantee a light chuckle from your seated form as you ate your cereal in peace, watching him as he tries to rid of the bitter taste on his tongue. although, bitter as it may, the sweetness and the aching of his tooth overpowers the regret he fills for gulping an entire bottle of orange juice down his throat.
he's so glad that he had set up multiple cameras and recorders at different angles prior to your time spent with him because he just couldn't stop watching your reaction in loop whilst he tried to continue his investigations within gotham's latest crime news. yet no matter how hard he attempts to control himself, his eyes couldn't stop looming over to your form, finding your reaction too incredibly cute to be ignored. yeah, he'll do his duties later. for now, he just needs to... screenshot every single frame of your expressions.
jason isn't much of a joker but when reading you one of your favorite stories, he had managed to mispronounce one of the words so badly that it ruined the narrative of the classical book he was voice acting for you. it was a stupid thing to laugh at, but for a guy like jason, who was an english nerd in his very prime, it would be hilarious— especially when his gothamite accent seeps into his vocabulary; which is very unbefitting for the voice of a character who was a princess that loves to wear frilly, pink dresses.
imagine a man, with a growl that vibrates through his skull, and muscles that bulge through his shirt, voices a princess of all people! his high pitched register for the character was already grating to your ears, but the sudden shift from an airy and girlish to deep and gruff with an added effect of a voice crack at the word "cake" was enough to let you burst out into laughs, your giggles echoing through the comfortable silence of the manor's library. for the first time in a while, you let jason wrap his arms around your shoulder, asking for your input about his tremendous acting skills.
jason never had many moments to cherish within the manor, preferring to stay over and outside of bruce's radar, but god does he love going through the batcave's live feed just to zoom in on your expressions, the grin on your face heavily reminds him of himself, back when he was the oblivious robin with no idea of what was coming to him. yet only now, he swears to protect your smile from never faltering.
damian takes his artistry skills seriously, constantly making a show of bragging to you whenever he has the opportunity to. but this time, he was incredibly pissed at drake for accidentally squeezing all the paint from the tube of oil paints he had stored by the drawers, and it was a shade closest to your skin tone, too; he meant to use that tube of paint for his next portrait of you. so like the petty child he is, damian sets on an hour long routine of drawing tim with monstrous features that screams the opposite of what he sports.
that means he had drawn multiple variants of tim with a hideous, actual bowl cut one. no seriously, his hair was a bowl and the strands that peeked out of it were spaghetti strands. in another drawing, his red robin outfit consists of plucked feathers and an elongated beak for its mask, what seems to be the pocket for the eyes now replaced with cat-like slits that makes the vigilantes expression looker idiotic and downright stupid. yet it felt therapeutic for damian to draw that his brother with what he felt was enough revenge to exact upon drake. that scum deserved a horrendously made portrait of him.
what he didn't expect was that you had stumbled upon his atelier, wanting to cure your boredom by painting a scenery when all of a sudden you had to drop all your equipment from your hands because... what the fuck was damian painting...? why is tim crawling across the floor in one of the portraits...? it takes a second or two for you to register the drawing's very detailed portrayal of a literal bowl cut, your laughter bursting out of the seams because no fucking way did damian actually draw something so hilarious and unserious. if you were anybody else, damian would've kicked your shins so violently you would've required a visit to the hospital. but because it's you... he chooses to sulk in the corner with puffed cheeks and burning ears as you approach the painting with said curiosity of a child and a laughter you can't stifle so easily.
at least it got you to stay in the same room as him for about an hour, with you giving your youngest brother more ideas to make the drawings even more unsettling than they already were, to which damian takes your tips to heart.
after you had eagerly (and shyly) showed the entire family you and damian's shared creation of a monstrosity, tim swears he'll never squeeze a tube of damian's paint anymore.
#🍨... yael's talking#🧁... yael's misc.#series: again & again#yandere dc#yandere batfam#yandere dick grayson#yandere jason todd#yandere tim drake#yandere damian wayne#yandere batman#yandere batboys#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x gn reader#yandere x male reader#yandere x you#yandere x y/n#yandere x darling#platonic yandere#doing the core-four for now bec i dont want to spoil much#i rlly have a unique talent of turning any ask into a long post don't i....
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18+ / mdi
content: loser!jungkook, sub!jungkook, softdom!reader, oral (m receiving), etc.
part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, extra
wc: 1632
a/n: i havent read the previous three parts in months so if theres any discrepancies pls forgive</3
masterlist
in the time you'd known jungkook, you'd never actually been to his apartment.
he was at university on a scholarship, meaning that he didn't have to worry about paying for schooling or dorming. any money he earned from tutoring or any allowance received by his parents was all his to keep, meaning that his current residence was nicer than that of the average student.
despite being aware of all of this, you were still quite shocked the first time he brought you around.
unlike what you'd expected, jungkook's spacious studio apartment was not filled with nerdy figurines and stacks of comic books (god, that would've been adorable). instead, it replicated the appearance of the average bachelor pad. the furniture appeared of good quality, the bed was comfy, the decor clean, and even the cleanliness gave you a vibe of maturity and put-togetherness that you hadn't quite gotten from jungkook yet. at least not to this extent.
the most shocking thing, though? that was jungkook himself; his look and demeanor while lounging around his apartment.
he'd been growing his hair recently, something which you adored, though tonight had been the first time you'd ever seen him with it without the proper care you assumed went to it every morning. the messy curls laid at the sides, fluffy after a whole day of being worn and played with by the wind. accompanied by that, he donned some loose sweats and a simple tank top, two garments you'd never once seen on the boy. he tended to go for less casual outfits while in public, usually wearing buttoned up flannels or graphic tees.
unfortunately for you, his slight change in look had an instant effect on you. had anyone else seen him like this, you were sure they'd pursue him immediately. as of late, more and more girls were taking notice of him. since meeting you, his confidence had gone up and his way of presenting himself had evolved quite a bit. just a few more months and you were sure he'd become a heartthrob by all definition of the word.
"god, you're gorgeous," you practically whimpered as soon as he let you in, having taken a few moments to simply stare at him before pecking his lips as a greeting.
"oh, i- thanks. you're prettier," he mumbled back as he welcomed you in, "sorry it's a little messy."
he must've been kidding. the place was insanely tidy! you expected as much from jungkook, but it was still surprising to find a college-aged boy with cleanliness.
"it's perfect, baby. show me to your room?", you went straight into business.
with a sheepish smile, he led you to his room.
you had previously agreed that you'd be spending the night tonight. it was your first sleepover at his place, which had you both giddy at the thought. there was no special reason for it other than your sudden insistence for it about a week ago, claiming you wanted to see where a one jeon jungkook spent his nights away from you.
he was shy about it at first, as per usual, but agreed after a few smiles and kisses from you.
and so now you had the privilege of laying on his bed on a saturday night, clad in a pair of his boxers and an oversized shirt of his as you waited for him to do his skincare.
you had insisted on not packing an overnight bag, knowing jungkook would have anything you needed at his place — he was very well put together, after all.
smiling at him as soon as he entered the room, you extended your arms to motion him over to the bed, causing him to chuckle shyly as he stepped towards you. once he was at a close enough distance, you grabbed at his arms, pulling him to the bed and somehow managing to get him to lay down, climbing on him immediately after.
"hey, there, gorgeous," you flirted, hands on his shoulders and full weight sitting on his crotch area. it wouldn't take long until you found a tent under you.
"you don't have to try and fluster me every time you see me anymore, you know ..." he mumbled as he lost any ounce of control under you.
"where's the fun in that?", you smirked as your hands traced their way under his shirt, pulling it off him without a second thought, "god, how'd you get even more handsome?", you groaned as you took him in, so pretty below you with his long hair and his breathless state.
"i- i just- oh-,"
you gave him no chance to speak, choosing instead to quickly throw off your his own shirt and lower your lips down to his. the kiss was immediately heated. you could never really help yourself around jungkook, but fortunately, he liked that about you.
he'd gotten a bit less shy with time. his hands were more willing to explore your body nowadays, currently finding themselves on your waist as he pulled you closer to him.
you adored how much more comfortable he'd gotten around you, both sexually and not so. at times, he'd even initiate sex with you. these instances were a bit awkward for him, but you always liked to encourage him, letting him know through your enthusiasm how much you enjoyed it when he went after what he wanted.
however, you still had to keep him on his toes somehow.
like now.
"no touching, baby," you murmured between kisses, grabbing onto his hands and pinning them above his head as you leaned down onto him.
with a simple gulp, he nodded, lips shyly smooching so you'd kiss him again.
continuing your kiss, your hands went down to his torso, sneaking under the fabric and beginning to play with the skin there. your fingers traced the ridges of his abs, adoring how he shuddered against you but made no complaint. the silent effect of your actions only lasted up until your hands made their way north, eventually finding his nipples and tracing them teasingly.
the poor boy under you whimpered against your lips. his arms made some movement, but did not stray away from where you'd left them above his head, still pressed together as he attempted to follow your directions and not touch you.
your next move was to rid him of his clothes altogether, requiring to get off him for a few moments but immediately taking your rightful place straddling him on his bed once more.
"prettiest thing i've ever seen," you hummed as you looked down at him, leaning down to press kisses on every inch available.
"please ..." he mumbled when your lips first made contact with his chest, knowing their next destination.
ignoring him, you continued as before, letting your lips find their way to his nipple and twirling your tongue around it in a teasing manner. your barely there touch had him whining at the contact, wanting more from you.
you took pity on him, deciding to go all the way and suckling on the bud just how you knew he liked. except the poor boy could barely handle the pleasurable pain that came from it. he writhed under you as you alternated between pecs, filling his chest with love bites that'd flourish by the next morning.
the kisses made their way down his body, landing at his happy trail by the time you lowered yourself to your knees at the end of the bed. with a bite to your lip, you enjoyed the view of what was to be in your mouth in mere moments.
jungkook sat up, wanting to see what threat of pleasure approached him next. he groaned upon seeing how hungry you looked eyeing his hardness, but he remained a good boy by keeping his hands to his sides rather than reaching for you.
"a-ah, fuck," he groaned as soon as your lips made contact with his member, lightly closing in on his tip and suckling at it in a way that had his breath catching and eyes rolling back.
keeping your eyes on the trembling boy, you caught glimpse of his hands fisting harshly at the sheets, holding himself back from wrapping around your hair as he usually did. the thought made you smile around him. he was so so sweet and well mannered.
deciding to be just as nice, you engulfed as much of him as you could, practically deepthroating him. his reaction was immediate, whining and writhing above you while you had your fun with his cock.
"p-please, oh fuck, please," he pleaded for nothing in particular.
you weren't one to ever deny him of anything. every one of your actions was meant to aid him in his pleasure.
humming against him, you slobbered all over him, not minding the mess of your saliva and his cum slowly dripping down onto your chin as long as the pretty boy above you was losing himself because of you.
as per usual, his orgasm hit him pretty quick. as shy as he was, he was never too timid to let himself cum when he hit his limit. jungkook was one to appreciate the pretty girl giving him pleasure by demonstrating his immense appreciation.
it always got to you how loud he became while cumming, which was currently causing a mess in your panties. you decided to enjoy every drop of his orgasm before paying mind to that, though.
finally done torturing him by licking off any remnants off his dick, you climbed up his body and sat yourself on his lap with a smile, leaning in for a teasing tongue-filled kiss before humming in satisfaction against his breathless lips.
"did i tell you i love how you're growing out your hair?"
he gulped.
"you've, uh, you've mentioned."
#bts fanfic#bts imagines#bts scenarios#bts x reader#bts smut#bts scenario#jungkook imagine#jungkook fanfic#jungkook scenarios#jungkook smut#jungkook x reader
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I RE-DO | JJK
18+ minors DNI
ONESHOT.
synopsis: Young love is so sweet, but people never realize how foolish it can be (sometimes), especially for you and Jungkook. You and Jungkook were the typical high school sweethearts, and after school, you thought you were grown enough to get married. Your families disagreed, but you still went through with it. It was fine for the first year; you were still in the honeymoon phase. But soon, reality caught up, and you both had to go to university. You attended the same university, thinking it would make things easier. Many obstacles came your way, but you were still going strong, afraid of proving your family right. However, after two years of unhappiness, you both called it quits. Unfortunately, your relationship ended on a sour note, and the man you once loved turned into someone you never wanted to see again. So, what happens now, when you face him one more time after many years of being away from him.
playlist: Lewis Capaldi - Before You Go, Lewis Capaldi - Someone You Loved, Sia - Bird Set Free. Billie Eilish - wildflower, The weeknd - out of time
Ex husband Jungkook x ex-wife reader.
Lovers to I-don’t-like-you to strangers.
WC: 24.k [whoa.]
Warnings: <heavy?> ANGST, ANGST, ANGST. flashbacks (light), disagreements, young marriage, Jungkook is a lawyer, reader is a doctor. No accurate description of law or reality. crying, lol. very much angsty of angst. forgive any errors you encounter; it is revised but oh gosh there's only so much I can notice.
a/n: you might hate me for this one lol. but it is what it is.
As you walk into the room, you’re taken aback by the figure of the man you see. He's the last person you expected. it's been a while since you've seen him, a very long one at that.
The last time you saw him was well...
When you were with Jungkook.
Taehyung hadn't noticed you when you walked in. Your mask and scrubs doing a perfect job at hiding your identity. You wonder if he'd remember you. He surely would, it’s not like a million years have gone by.
and though he hasn't noticed you yet, you do notice him. The thing that catches your eye is how he's definitely grown out of his teenage face. His features are more chiseled. It suits him. Makes him look more matured.
A lot seems to have changed: he's married and now having a baby. Taehyung having a baby? You and Jungkook would've never thought. The local party boy settling down and starting a family, that's news.
You've grown to understand that people change though, you yourself as an example. You were kind of the typical party girl in your college days. Nothing too crazy though but you definitely enjoyed your liquor and music. Now you've changed and grown more reserved. Did you plan on it? No, it just happened, and you grew out of that life for some reason.
It's lost to you how Taehyung underwent his metamorphosis. Whether he wanted to or just like you "just happened", has you wondering. Your brain doesn't bother you too much about it.
But one thing your mind keeps on loop is if Jungkook has changed too and if so, how much? Did he ever grow to realize and reflect on himself.
You soon brush the thoughts away though. The last thing you should be thinking about is Jungkook, when you've got a job to do.
Sounds of relief and of a baby's cry soon fill the room. The noise helps you block further thoughts you want or should be thinking.
But still, it seems your brain doesn't work hard enough. Hence, leading you to wonder if this would've been you and Jungkook. Would it have been you doing the skin to skin with a baby you grew for 9 months with the man you love by your side for support. Could it have been Jungkook instead being handed the scissors to cut the umbilical cord. His usual bunny smile and doe eyes staring down at the baby. And his hands shaking cause of how nervous he'd be. he never liked to mess up.
"Look yn, you did it. I'm so proud of you baby." he would coo, those doe eyes staring right into you with pure love and joy. "Oh! Not you baby. I'm talking to your mother. How am I going to call both of you baby." He would say and laugh at his own joke afterwards. You would too, his jokes were so cheesy and cute. You loved them still though. you'd always wanted a family with him.
You were a fool to think you'd stop thinking about all that could've been. It pisses you off. You thought by now, passed all these years and some relationships it would stop. But it never did and seeing Taehyung only reminds you of everything you've been trying to forget.
"Yn." Your senior doctor called you out of your thoughts. "Do a checkup on the Kim baby for me, I have another job." You nod and walk around to pick up the necessary paperwork.
You loved your job. Seeing life being brought into the world. The smile on the families faces and the happy couples. Even holding the little babies was so heartwarming.
But there are downsides to the job, many than you'd like to say. The tears the yelling, the disappointment. The losses, your biggest fears.
It broke your heart to see a woman push hard only for life to go as soon as it came. You never cried in front of the families; you had to be strong. But you always did at home. You cried for many things. All the lives that could've been or how your life could've been. All things that might have been if you chose differently. Sometimes you'd get lost and end up crying about a dead fish you lost when you were 10. You didn't mind as long as you were crying and getting things off your chest.
Even through your own turmoil you were always there for the families: to give a warm presence. You did all you were allowed. Some others would appreciate the comfort, but some would yell curses at you. You didn't blame them, emotions are high. It's part of the job.
A thick skin.
You've grown it over the years. Whether it's from your own parents, Jungkook's parents or Jungkook himself. You've learnt how to cover up. It's not a good way of living but it's got you through most of the things in your life.
You're grown now. And you pat yourself on the back for what you went through. You were able to make it out and be where you want to be, even through the confusion of life and relationships.
You love your job, and you'd never change it, but it's so easy to feel empty and lonely. Whatever it is you're missing you don't know. But you can definitely feel an emptiness in you.
"Mr. and Mrs. Kim, I'm here to check up on you and the baby." You say walking in and deciding to address them formally. Clipboard in hand and mask forgotten.
It took him a second, then two, then three to recognize that voice. Then when he stared long enough it dawned on him.
"Yn?" Taehyung says dumbstruck. He was sat by his wife talking, while the baby slept, but as soon as he recognized you, he was on his feet.
You never thought he'd recognize you. but you assume you haven't changed that much, or Taehyung just knows you too well. He was your friend too. And it did crush you when you didn't talk to him or ignored him over these years.
"Taehyung." you say trying keep it professional but still acknowledging how you're just as pleased see to him.
"Yn!" you hear him call out in a faux sob. And soon like lightning you feel him crash you with his arms. He squeezes you so tight you might burst.
"I've missed you! why did you leave me?" You can hear sadness in his voice. It hurts your heart. You never meant to ditch him too, but it was difficult to stay friends when you knew where he was Jungkook would be too.
You rub his back in a way to reciprocate the hug as much as you can. He holds you so tight that you can barely move, and you're about to turn blue.
Turning your eyes to his wife, you beg for a hand.
"Tae, you're going to break our baby's doctor." She lectures him and with a final squeeze he lets you go. She's heard of you from what Taehyung has mentioned but not in great detail. Only when he's explaining a funny story that you might have been involved in, and her curiosity grew.
You all laugh as he lets you go, and you collect your breath.
"I'm sorry." His wife apologizes with her sweet voice before she sends a glare to her husband. You shake your head, understanding that Taehyung might have not grown as much as you thought. He's still got that hyper personality of his.
he pouts and turns back to you.
"Yn." He whines and you flinch thinking he'll hug you again. He doesn't.
"Taehyung how have you been?" You say still professional and calmed down. You're excited to see him and just as happy, but it's just difficult for you to adjust after not seeing him for so long.
"Is that all you can say? And why are you so professional?" He whines, and you chuckle at how he's still so childish.
"I'm a doctor, Taehyung. I can't be jumping around like a monkey." You say, clutching your clipboard to your chest.
His wife chuckles and says something about him not maturing yet. You of all people are aware of how childish he can be.
And like for the first time Taehyung takes in your outfit and gasps. "Shit yn you did it." He says with a smile "Doc yn." He teases.
"Don't tease me." you blush.
"I'm so proud of you though. I always thought you'd been kidding about the doctor thing." He rubs the back of his neck feeling embarrassed about doubting you. But you don't take offence as you show him your smile.
"I was very serious as you can see."
You both just chuckle.
"So, we're you...l-like in here too."
"Yeah, I think she was, I saw you right? Docter's assistant, right?" His wife asks.
You nod in affirmation.
Taehyung mentally slaps himself. How could he have not noticed. He feels so stupid right now.
"I'm so glad you delivered my baby." he says with a proud smile.
"Well, I didn-"
"Shut up you did deliver my baby." He slaps down your statement. "No, but like seriously, of all people in the world I'm glad you were the one to do."
You bow smiling, appreciating his words. Doing this feels like apologizing for ditching him. And hearing him say that makes you love you job even more.
"Waaah, look at how professional she is now." He mocks as he turns to his wife to tell her how you were such a brat and party girl. You deny the allegation even though they are true cause you don't want to ruin his wife's perception of you.
You've changed anyways so doesn't matter anymore.
"Don't worry we were all party girls once at least." She says and you can't help but appreciate how kind and sweet she seems. You haven't been introduced to her. But you find it unnecessary when you remember why you actually came here.
"I came to check on you and the baby." You say turning on professional mode which was never off.
You walk over to the baby, who was still sound asleep. Cute.
They all nod, letting you do your thing.
"Tell me yn.." Taehyung says when he's now sat by his wife. "Who does she look like?" He wants to settle the debate they've been having.
"Just be honest."
You turn to analyze the baby you were already scanning. You couldn't help but notice a little bit of Taehyung but when you stare longer you start to see more of his wife.
"I think she shares both of your features quite well." You speak.
Taehyung whines disappointed in your answer.
"She's just being professional, we should ask her when we go for dinner."
Dinner? when did you say you'd be going for dinner. You ignore it.
They talk and you smile at how they tease each other and are happy together. These are always your favorite kind of days.
"What time is Jungkook coming?" His wife whispers to Taehyung, but you're still able to catch on.
Jungkook's coming here? He's going to be here. The hell. You should've expected it, maybe you would've asked someone else to be here instead. But when you think about it you realize how inevitable it was, plus you got to reunite(?) with Taehyung. You doubt you'll see each other after this.
"He should be here soon." Your heart races and throat dries up for whatever emotion your body will not communicate to you.
Fuck. you still have more tests to run, and you haven't even begun with the mother.
You take a deep breath as the baby stirs but still stays calm. You're focused on the baby as you set her back into the hospital crib. The hospital you worked at was a really high-end one. Well, at least the part that Taehyung had picked out. He must be doing well for himself cause these ends are quite expensive.
He's a finance bro, studied finance and got a good job. So, he's differently doing well.
You wonder how Jungkook's doing, is he doing well...
"Look who's a dad."
You hear a knock, then the familiar voice follows. Your heart freezes and so does your whole body.
"Shh." Taehyung lectures him pointing to your direction. "There's a baby"
Jungkook follows his friend's eyes, to you. But he doesn't realize it's you, and you're glad for that. You wish you could just slip out right now.
But why are you the one anxious, he should be the one trembling right now. Not you.
"Can I see her?" He coos and Taehyung nods.
"She's getting a check up though." Taehyung adds as Jungkook walks to you and your heart grows tighter as his steps grow closer. but you choose to stand firm in your spot.
The heels of his shoes tap against the floor and regrets wearing them. But he just came here from the office so he can't be blamed.
"I'm sure it's fine, right doctor?" He says with charm in his voice.
His voice awakens so many things in you. Anger, hate, insecurity, doubt, memory, yearn, search. But mainly anger. Anger at all that still left you burnt and bruised. All the stupid mistakes of your youth that you were warned about and could have avoided.
"I'd advise you wash your hands first." You turn to look at him eyes bland of any visible emotion.
Professional, yn be professional.
"Yn?" He says shocked and smile dropped from its previous spot. He heard your voice before getting to see your face. And if his memory serves him right...he is right. He can't be wrong.
His heart's as far as the sea goes. Nothing and everything go through his mind.
You don’t give him a response.
"Please wash your hands and sanitize if you decide to be close to the baby." No warmth in your voice or room for conversation. Everyone in the room can feel the tension and Jungkook is still shocked to see you, eyes and hands unmoving. He can't figure what he's feeling or thinking, he just...
Never expected to see you here. It's almost like a slap to his face, like the last time he saw you. And at the memory of the day, bitterness and anger sink in him.
You walk past him leaving a cold breeze for him to relish in.
You try to plaster a smile when you see the tension you caused. "Now it's your turn." You say to Taehyung's wife as you begin her checkup.
You're really trying your best to keep it cool, but you can feel the acid by your throat burn.
Jungkook just clears his throat and goes to the sink and washes his hands. Mind lost of any thoughts, but choosing to ignore them as usual.
"So, I'm and uncle huh?" He says trying to clear himself of the tightness in his chest. Even though his voice doesn't sound as confident as before, he's just going to ignore it.
Ignore you.
"She's so cute, she's looks like you Tae." He declares caressing her cheek with his index.
Taehyung cheers and his wife rolls her eyes.
"Can you imagine, yn said she shares both our features."
And the reminder that you're Actually here and not a nightmare is set for Jungkook to relish in.
"Docter's always right Taehyung, you should listen." You don't know whether he's being serious or sarcastic, but you could care less. All you want is to be out of here and away from him.
You want to scoff but choose to suck it in and ignore the remark or whatever it meant.
Taehyung shrugs, deciding to let it go. It didn't matter who the baby looked like. It's all light-hearted. He's just happy that both his wife and the baby are okay.
Taehyung does realize the tension, which cause him to somewhat do things deliberately. He wanted to out loud comment on it but he's just going to let fate do its thing instead.
Once he saw you, he knew you'd have to meet Jungkook. It honestly makes him happy. Even though you're ignoring each other.
"Everything's good, so I'll be taking my leave now." you say. Everyone nods and acknowledges giving you little thanks Yous as you grab your stuff. Only Taehyung and his wife. You managed to ignore him and avoid him and all you have to do now is leave.
But as you're walking out a voice speaks.
"Yn, can we get some water?" Jungkook says, voice certain and eyes lowered at you.
He's just trying to get a rise at you yn, walk away. You try to calm yourself. There's so much bottled that you only realized today. You'd thought your anger died long ago but you guess not.
His statement is simple and not that deep but it's the way he says it and how your name has so much weight to it as he speaks it. Makes you irritated. How he's always made you stretch your neck out for him, but he never did for you.
"It's doctor. And about the water? That's not my job." You say your professional demeanor dropping so you can deliver it with more attitude. He knows it's not your job; he just wanted to say and see that look your face.
Why he did it? He doesn't have a reason but just wanted to (maybe) release the tightness in his chest. It doesn't leave anyways.
Fucking piss of shit.
"We should get married."
You stare at the goofball in front of you a smile forming on your face as you watch him speak.
"What?" You chuckle and he frowns at how unserious you're taking him.
"I'm serious yn, I want to marry you." He holds your hand. "We can get married, we're 19 and we're going to uni soon."
He watches how your face contorts at his suggestion.
"Do you not want to marry me?" He lifts his brow, and you groan.
"I do want to..." you start and as he waits to hear your but "...but..." and there it is "Don't you think we're a little too young for that?"
"We're old enough and plus what matters is that we love each other." he holds you closer to him under the tree you two adored to use to hide from the world.
"We'll get married, go to college together and when we can, get a house and live together."
You loved the sound of that, married to Jungkook and living with him as you went to school and back home to each other. Of course you wanted that life with him, but there's a lot you're scared of,
"And our parents?" You ask worried.
He rubs your shoulder.
"Who cares what they think, I love you and I want to marry you." you blush and lean in closer into him feeling his heartbeat under your palm. You loved being with him, alone and away from the world and that's what you hoped marriage will do for the two of you. Keep your love protected from the world.
"So?" He asked and you knew what you were required to do. "Will you marry me yn?"
You stay silent to tease him and when he tickles you for an answer, you agree to answer.
"Yes Jungkook I'll marry you."
He smiles at your answer and places a kiss on your cheek holding you closer to him.
"I'll always love you yn, not matter what okay?" He squeezes his face into yours.
"Okay?" He's voice is muffled against your cheek as you giggle.
"Okay, Jungkook, okay." your laughter dies down as he stops to place a kiss on your cheek.
You hated this. No. You hated him.
What's he so full of that he can come here and try to be sarcastic with you. In your territory. You'll give it to him that he didn't know you'd be here but to be fair that's not an excuse to be an ass. You'd thought maybe he'd changed.
But no, he's still shitty and condescending as fuck.
You're glad you divorced him, and you're glad to know that you still hate his face. His stupid face. The stupid face that has grown into its masculine and manly features.
You hate that you even noticed that.
"Yn you good? "
"Huh?" You say still brain fogged "Yeah I'm good, just tired." You smile awkwardly and Rosie knows it's a lie. She sits next to you on the break-room bench.
"You sure? " She asks and you nod, not trusting your voice to speak.
"I don't believe you."
"Then don't." You say coming out a little too harsh, you're not mad at her so you apologize for the attitude. You're still set off from the interaction with Jungkook. It was barely an interaction cause you two were avoiding each other like two ships at sea. But the tension and the way you avoided each other's space said a lot.
"Tell me yn." She whines in her bratty voice. "We've been friends since high school, why not tell me."
You sigh. You two have been friends for some time. She's been there for you and Jungkook's first date and your divorce. Damn it you did years of medicine together, so why hide from her. Plus, you know she won't stop bugging till you tell her.
"Jungkook's back." You probably shouldn't have phrased it like that. He's not back, you just happened to meet him while another old friend had a child.
"Taehyung had a baby and they have a delivery room upstairs and I bumped into him." You elaborate.
"Taehyung had a kid?" You deadpan her at how that's the only thing she heard. "Okay, okay" she raises her hands in defence. "So, you just saw him, you didn't talk?"
"No." you never really talked so you wouldn't phrase it as that.
"Then what's wrong darling." She wraps her arms around you and brings her face to yours.
You explain to her what he said and why it pissed you off.
"I'm just kinda pissed off. " You sigh and lean into her.
"He's a dick don't mind him. He's probably miserable and trying to bring you down after seeing you living out your dreams." She tries to comfort you.
You shake your head. "I don't know he looks good-he looks well I mean," you correct yourself. "Plus, Taehyung's in the private suite so I doubt they are anything close to broke."
Rosie doesn't know what to say now, she's not surprised. But you look disturbed and she wants to help.
"You know what? it doesn't even matter." she goes quiet. "You know what? we should go for drinks on the weekend."
Normally, you'd say no. But it's been while since you went out and the weekend was coming and you were weirdly free through all of it. So it wouldn't hurt to go out.
"Okay." Rosie's taken aback by your lack of reluctance. She prepared a whole speech to convince you encase you said no.
"Which bar? " You ask curious.
"Satin."
"Isn't it just opening up?" You stare with a questioning look. The opening of satin was all that was being talked about amongst your friends. So, you'd eventually end up curious and want to go there. it wasn't your plan to go on the first day though.
"Yeah makes it much better to find some rich bachelor." she whispers. "This doctor/residence job isn’t gonna pay for my new car."
You roll your eyes and chuckle at her amusement. She honestly makes you happy and able to forget everything that makes you feel like shit. It's her bright and bubbly characteristic that you envy and seem to lack.
"So, you and yn?" Taehyung asks as he does his warmups. Jungkook laughs at how Taehyung has been warming up for so long. He knows he's probably avoiding real gym work.
"What about me and her?" Jungkook says as he puts on his boxing gloves, trying his best to keep the conversation short.
He's not surprised he's bringing this up, he actually prepped himself for it.
"Still awkward?" Tae bends and stretches. Jungkook points for him to quit it and grab some gloves. He groans and grabs a pair. He should honestly be making most of the time he's got to be in a gym because he won't be here often.
"It's been over 4 years since we talked of course it's awkward." Jungkook sends some practice punches into the air. He needs to quicken this conversation with Taehyung. He knows what he's doing, and he knew it was going to happen as soon as he left the hospital, he was just waiting for when.
"Why not talk it out?" Jungkook almost snorts out at how stupid this conversation is.
Taehyung feels a gush of wind pass his face as Jungkook deliberately missed his face. Whether it's to shut him up, get him ready to work out or just for the fun of it, he doesn’t know. Taehyung doesn't know but Jungkook now options to hit him. He uses his arms to protect himself from the man too focused on working out than the conversation.
"We never talked it out when we divorced, so why should we now." He speaks so lightly of the situation, no emotion or care for it. "We have no relationship." He spits out as he throws a punch that Taehyung dodges.
"Bullshit. You and yn are goals" Taehyung pauses "were goals at least, before whatever the fuck happened."
Jungkook chuckles but it's not anything from genuine amusement or from the good memories you two shared.
"Don't laugh, I'm serious. You need to talk to her and get this shit sorted." Taehyung groans ad he blocks more of his blows. They grow more intense. "I hate being in between you two." Taehyung throws a punch of his own, when Jungkook is slow. "Pity me a child of divorced parents. Imagine how this has traumatized me." Taehyung is quick to his feet to throw a punch and Jungkook is the one to block it.
"Too bad. But you look fine to me, a kid, a wife and a good paying job." Jungkook takes back his dominance.
He's happy for Taehyung, but to say he isn't a little jealous is a..
"And what about you? " Jungkook loses his focus for a second and Taehyung lands a low blow in his gut.
He groans and fixes his footing and gloves as he tries to one-up Taehyung.
"I've got a good paying job. That's all I need." he says bluntly trying to focus on a free spot to throw a blow.
"Lies. Look the universe has brought you two back together, talk it out with yn."
Bang. Jungkook smacks Taehyung in the side of his face. To be fair that felt quite personal and he slightly feels bad for hitting him. He doesn't want him to go home and see his kid while he's all bloody.
But that's what he gets for bringing you up as a topic to talk about. After all these years, like he cares.
He doesn't care. Still, it's not like seeing you doesn't make him feel some sort of way. He feels something. Definitely some type of bitterness, anger and emptiness.
"No. Plus it's been 4 years. Far too long to 'talk it out'. " He air quotes with his gloves on. "And it's not just a small problem, we went through the wringer and failed.” Jungkook uses rapid movements to stop his thoughts. “So even if we talked it out what would it change, we can't be friends anymore. Or lovers at that." He scoffs at the thought.
Taehyung jumps back indicating he wants to stop and focus on the topic. Jungkook groans and rolls his eyes.
Taehyung doesn't care, he'll press on. He knows Jungkook likes to avoid and that's why he'll keep bringing it up.
"Closure, Jungkook closureeeee!" Taehyung empathizes.
Jungkook chuckles. "She divorced me, that's my closure. I signed the papers, that's her closure." He won't lie but he could feel how harsh and insensitive his words sound as they left his mouth. But it's too late to take them back. At least you weren't here to hear them.
"Oh, come on, don't be so stiff hearted." he takes off his gloves getting kind of irritated at his friend for being so reckless and not doing what he should've done years ago.
Fight for you. Make you want to stay. Change and be better. Or whatever.
As a witness Taehyung knows what Jungkook and you had can never be replaced. And even though Jungkook has tried he's just miserable though he says otherwise. But he's just so stubborn.
"Well maybe if she wasn't so stiff minded, we would've been the ones with the kid, maybe even two with a dog even." he says chugging down a bottle of water trying cool his racing heart that races from the exercise and not the thought of starting a family with you. The thoughts have always haunted him. And they've now been revived even more and it's irritating.
"See? Talk it out. " Taehyung says feeling like he's found a weak spot.
"Fuck off. Its never gonna happen. I'm just talking out of my ass." Taehyung knows he's lying; he's always known Jungkook to want a family and the only person he knew that he'd want that was with you. He knows it's hard to reignite something from years ago, but it's never too late to try.
"More like heart" Taehyung whispers and Jungkook sends him a dead-behind -the-eyes gaze.
You had forgotten how much you enjoyed dressing up and going out with your friends. From marriage, to school, to work you've really lost some parts of yourself. You still love and appreciate it all in the good and bad, but you still wish you could have some of your college ways back.
The mini dresses, heels, makeup and hair done. Just reminds you of how attractive you are.
You laugh.
Even through all these efforts you're finding hard to put yourself out there into the dating world. It's all tiring, from the men to the dates, to the kissing and touching that never satisfies. It’s just not the same anymore. Nothing feels good and you hate to admit it.
You decided to go dressed casual but still making an effort.
"Oh my gosh girl, switch bodies with me." Rosie whines as she cheers you on in your outfit. She's dressed in a tiny black skirt and red lace top; she looks so good and you're sure she's gonna leave you alone the whole night.
Rosie always looks good in what she wears, and you admire how confident she manages to be. you wish that for yourself right now.
You do love to dress up. But like most things, you've lost a touch for looking good. Most of your times you're either in your scrubs or in comfy home clothes you wear when you never see the light of day.
But for tonight you make an effort to connect into your inner party girl.
The black, mid-thigh, bodycon dress hugs your figure as its long sleeves hug your arms. Rosie’s favorite part of the dress; the low bare back cut.
You were feeling a little self-conscious about it but when Rosie told you looked hot and you'd definitely catch everyone's eye., you decide to say fuck it and go on.
That's the point of tonight, right? To let go and forget.
"I think it's so fucking cool that Jimin opened a nightclub," Namjoon says, sitting at the back of the car.
"It's quite Jimin of him," Taehyung and Namjoon laugh.
And like a saint, Jungkook keeps his eyes on the road, his hands gripping the steering wheel.
"How about you?" They all turn to Jungkook.
Jungkook finally speaks when he realizes he's being talked to. "What about me?" He speaks as though he wasn't paying attention to the conversation.
"What do you think about Jimin opening a club?"
Jungkook shifts in his seat for no specific reason. "It's cool, I guess."
"Cool?" Namjoon exclaims at how boring and plain his answer sounds. "Come on."
"What?" Jungkook defends himself. "I mean, it's cool, and I'm proud of him. What else do you want me to say?" He leans back into the car seat, finally getting comfortable, but his mind is still so far away.
Taehyung and Namjoon furrow their brows at Jungkook’s tone but soon brush away his lack of excitement or interest. In his defence, he was with Jimin during every step of buying and furnishing the club, so it's not as exciting for him. Only Jungkook had been in on it because he helped Jimin with the legal side of it all. So maybe that's why he's not so excited.
Or maybe it's because of the fact that he's never been one to be a club-goer. It's not that he doesn't enjoy it when he gets the chance, but it's never been for him. You were always the club-goer in the relationship, and you'd always drag him to go. And because you were with him, he would go and enjoy his time. It's all different now.
Clubs feel weird; they hold memories and empty feelings.
"Try to enjoy tonight, okay?" Taehyung pats Jungkook’s back.
He doesn't get the gesture but takes it anyway. Taehyung knows his friend isn't being himself right now, and he's got his suspicions about the cause. But he won't bug him; he’s already done his part.
They walk into the club and soon are met with their blond-haired friend, who excuses himself from the previous conversation to walk over to them.
Hugs and greetings are shared.
"Congratulations, bro! This place is beautiful."
Jimin's proud of how well this place turned out. It's his newfound pride and joy.
The place is a typical high-end nightclub, with the best music, drinks, and food. The decor and ambiance fit Jimin's fantasies to a tee.
"Yeah, all thanks to Kookie boy over here, I was able to buy and renovate it with no trouble." Jimin turns to Jungkook, who seems lost in staring at the place.
The club isn't too crowded; they got there early to look around and talk to Jimin because they knew he'd be busy the rest of the night.
"Ya! Jungkook, are you with us?" Jimin calls him out.
He turns to where he's being called as he blinks. "Y-yeah, I'm here."
They all choose to ignore it, knowing that he can be distant sometimes.
"You guys grab some drinks; I have some people to talk to." Jimin excuses himself, and they know the only time they're going to see him is when the night ends.
Jungkook is the first one to walk off and grab himself a drink; he's going to need it.
You and Rosie planned on going early, but because of traffic and your delay in getting ready, you were two hours late after the opening. You knew it would be packed since it was the grand opening, but shockingly, it was not as crowded as you expected. There was room to move and walk around. Most people were so well-dressed that you'd think this was a gala instead and that you were underdressed. But no matter what, you still felt out of place.
You looked good and felt good, but there’s only so much you can do to make yourself comfortable.
Rosie scoped the place, and when she spotted the bar, she pulled your hand toward it.
"First, we drink," she said, more excited than you. She ordered the drinks, and soon you were handed one.
As you sipped, you felt eyes on you. You'd felt them since you walked in; whether you minded it or not, you didn't know yet. You still felt like a sore thumb, but after this drink, you were sure you'd settle into the scene.
"So many hot men. Damn," Rosie muttered to herself, but you were still able to catch what she said. You chuckled, happy that she was settling in. She was so good at it.
Soon, you were on your third drink—nothing crazy. You weren't trying to get blacked out, but you were definitely feeling a little more settled in.
Rosie left a few minutes ago to talk to some people or whatever. And even though she offered, you declined to go along with her. You weren't up to meeting strangers tonight. You just wanted to enjoy yourself, by yourself. So, you sat by the bar and enjoyed the music.
"You enjoying the night?"
A voice from your left spoke. You took a minute to respond, debating whether the man was speaking to you.
You turned and took in his appearance: blond hair swooped back, making him look clean and professional, and a suit that fit his physique perfectly.
"Yeah," you chuckled, not sounding convincing and not trying to keep the conversation going.
The man seemed to want to continue talking, though, and honestly, you didn't know if you were interested in conversing with him. He didn't seem like a creep, but you could never know with men.
The silence consumed you (excluding the club music), and his presence lingered by your side.
A glass slid in front of you as you looked to the bartender, who then directed you to the man sitting next to you.
"It's on the house." He stared at you with a warm, cheeky smile, and you stared back with a suspicious one.
You took the glass into your hands and brought it to your lips. Might as well make the most of the interaction if he wasn't going to leave. "You say that like you own the place," you chuckled as the liquid slid down your throat. You couldn't help but cringe at how strong it tasted.
The blond stayed silent and watched you, waiting for you to catch on.
"Wait... are you actually the owner?" you paused.
You watched a slow smile form on his lips. He nodded.
You squinted. "Or are you just saying that to try and flirt?" You kept your eyes narrowed.
"The last thing I'd do is lie."
You wouldn't say you were surprised, because now that you looked at him, he fit the picture of a high-end nightclub owner. Even the way he spoke—gently and respectfully—made you want to warm up to him.
But why was he talking to you? Didn't he have other things to do?
"Wow. That's cool. The place looks lovely." You took in the environment one more time. You'd never expect to meet the owner of the club, and you never thought he'd be so young. Older men were typically more likely to own such a place.
"It should, because I spent quite the penny on it." He chuckled, sipping his own drink. You took in his words. How much does such a place cost? Does he own it by himself, or does he have partners? You didn't want to ask, though; you just kept your eyes on him and shifted them elsewhere when he turned to look at you.
"Must feel good to see it so full, huh?"
"Yeah, but..." he paused, and you turned your body to give him your full attention. Finally. "My heart breaks when I see people sitting at the bar, looking like they're not enjoying their time."
You laughed and blushed, embarrassed, knowing that he was talking about you. Is that what you looked like to people? Like you were bored?
You laughed one more time before you decided to speak. "I am enjoying my time," you started, not sounding too convincing at all. "It’s just been a while since I've been out."
He nodded. "I get it. Busy with work?" It was a random question, and he debated with himself on whether to assume.
"Yeah," you laughed, thinking about work, and soon your thoughts drifted back to the man you met, and the bitterness sprang up again, but you hid it, not wanting to sour your mood. You downed the drink, maybe to burn away the feeling and thought, to erase the picture forming in your mind.
"Then you should let loose." He stood, holding out his hand for you.
"W-what?" You choked out with a smile.
"Come dance with me." He was charming; you wouldn't lie, and you were definitely charmed.
"No, I can't..." you laughed.
"You have a boyfriend?" He raised a brow, and you shook your head. "Husband?" You could feel the acid reflux come back up again. You shook your head once more, this time less enthusiastically.
"Then come dance with me. Please?" He held his hand out, waiting for your answer. "Make my night."
You didn't need much sweet-talking; you were going to say yes anyway, but he seemed like a nice guy, and he was attractive—very much so. It wouldn't hurt to dance with someone, even just once. This was your chance to catch up to Rosie’s streak tonight, though no one could compete.
"Okay," you said as you took his hand, which was warm to the touch. Your eyes moved down to his wrist as you noticed the Rolex that adorned it. You weren't a watch person, but that was definitely some high-class stuff.
"Thank you," he said with a smile as he placed an unexpected hand on your lower back. You didn't mind it, and you soon warmed up to it.
You danced for a few minutes, and you quickly forgot your reluctance, letting loose in his arms. He swiftly pulled you back into his chest as you swayed your hips.
"Look at you," he said, complimenting how you smiled and danced. "And you wanted to rot yourself at the bar."
You sheepishly laughed, not knowing what to add. It was definitely nice to get off the stool and dance, especially with someone who had shockingly made you comfortable.
"I didn't catch your name, love," he whispered in your ear as you held onto his shoulders. He felt stupid for going this long without getting your name, but better late than never, right?
"My name's Y/N. What's yours?"
He smiled as he leaned in closer.
"Jimin."
"Jimin? That's a pretty name."
Jimin chuckled. He'd take the compliment.
"Is it?" You nodded. Jimin got lost in your eyes, and you got lost in his as well. "Would you like me to show you around?"
"Like around the club?" You moved back to catch his gaze as he nodded. "Yeah, sure, I'd like that."
So you stepped off the dance floor as he held your hand, guiding you on the path to walk. He wasn't planning on doing anything ridiculous with you; maybe it was just the excitement of being the new owner that had him wanting to show people around.
Meanwhile, Jungkook was still not feeling the atmosphere. Boredom and bitterness still coated his chest. Neither his friends nor the women who came to talk to him seemed to make the night pleasant.
Though he tried to avoid it, the alcohol did help to make the night a little more tolerable. He watched the dance floor from their VIP section as his friends chatted about whatever, and he stared mindlessly.
He listened to how Taehyung refused to drink, only settling for a non-alcoholic beverage since he had to go back home to a baby. Namjoon teased him for his newfound sense of responsibility.
"What the fuck is up with Jungkook?" Namjoon asked Taehyung directly.
"Maybe it's because he bumped into Y/N at the hospital. Did I tell you?"
Namjoon shook his head. "What was she doing there? Don't tell me she had a baby too!"
Taehyung scoffed at Namjoon’s suspicion. "No, she's a doctor. I think he'd lose his shit if she did, though. Just look at how affected he is from seeing her."
He definitely would. He'd lose his shit real bad.
"So you think it's about that?" Namjoon took a sip.
"Yeah, I'm sure."
"Did they seem cool at all?"
"As cool as two bulls seeing red," Taehyung scoffed.
"I'll be back." They heard the subject of their conversation speak as he stood.
"Damn," Namjoon said, watching Jungkook walk away.
Jungkook had been dodging every woman who came into contact with him. Tonight was about supporting Jimin, not finding a hookup. Plus, he had been too busy with work to even find interest in hooking up.
To be honest with himself, he had been quite thrown off since the day he saw you at the hospital. Your white coat and blue scrubs complemented your skin. Fuck, he hated it.
He hated being off his game; it was the anger he felt. He had always wondered what he would do if he ever saw you again, and he had never known the answer. Even right now, he didn't know what to do about it. But he didn't need to think too much about it. He had only seen you once, and that was that. It’s not like he was going to see you again.
Gosh, he always wondered if you stayed in Seoul, and it looked like you did. He had always felt fine not knowing if you were within the city or not. But now that he was sure you were still here and probably frequenting the same places he did, the town felt small, and the air felt suffocating.
He was angry, bitter, and confused. With Taehyung in his ear, he grew more bothered by your existence. He had been fine when he never saw you, never knew where you were, or if you were okay—not knowing if you had ever moved on or not. He had been fine not knowing and just forgetting about you.
Or at least he thought he was.
Seeing you just opened a wound to something he had forgotten—not healed.
Since that day, he had been bombarded with thoughts and worries about you. He had questions, but he didn't know if he would be able to ask them if he opened his mouth. Or if he would even want to know the answers to some.
Whenever you were around and he opened his mouth, he just let his bitterness take the lead and speak for him.
He did feel shitty for what he said. To the outside eye, it might have seemed harmless, but between the two of you, it held more weight, and he should have known better than to say it.
Why couldn't he have just said "hi"? Like a normal person.
"Have you gotten the chance to go over the results?" Jungkook's assistant asks as he walks into his office. Is he an assistant? More like an associate, rather.
"No, I just got them, so I only skimmed through." To be honest, he's been trying to balance a lot lately: his work, this case, his thoughts, and his emotions—specifically, you. He's never had this much trouble before, but it needs to stop. It's a big and emotionally sensitive case he needs to work on, so he needs to have his full focus on analyzing the case and not on what he did to lose you.
"Take a look," Jaehyun suggests to his superior, who seems out of it. "And I was thinking we should get a doctor to testify." He lays out the papers on Jungkook’s side table, and Jungkook lets him, watching closely and trying to pay attention.
"I can have some doctors go over the report and—" Jungkook's voice intercepts and startles the younger man.
"No. That won't be necessary. I already have someone." Jungkook says, a small smile taking over his face.
This is a good chance for him to see you again and get the opportunity to apologize for what he said. And maybe his mind will leave him alone.
"You've got to be kidding me! Why am I being haunted?" you exclaim, disbelief flooding your voice as you approach the front desk. The sight of Jungkook standing there sends a rush of conflicting emotions through you—anger, frustration, and an undeniable pang of something else you refuse to acknowledge. Jungkook knew you wouldn’t be happy to see him, but all he hoped was that you wouldn’t make a scene.
"Don't be childish," he replies, his tone clipped as you draw closer. "Look, I’m not here to argue; I just want to talk." He pulls you aside, creating a small barrier between the two of you and the bustling crowd around the desk.
"Nothing to talk about, Jeon," you mutter, folding your arms defensively. Surprisingly, you don’t walk away, even though every part of you screams to escape. You tell yourself it’s to avoid causing a scene, but deep down, you know it’s more complicated than that.
"I need your help." His rushed, hushed words catch you off guard, and you can’t help but snicker, a bitter laugh escaping your lips.
"With what?" You feign disinterest, but the urge to provoke him lingers, like a moth drawn to a flame.
"A case I'm working on. I need a doctor to testify." His seriousness is almost comical, and for a moment, you think he must be joking. It feels like a cruel twist of fate—he rose from the ashes of your past just to humiliate you all over again.
"And you came to me to recommend someone? I'm pretty sure you have other people to ask." You turn to leave, your heart racing with a mix of indignation and something softer that you refuse to acknowledge.
"I want your help." His words stop you in your tracks, and you feel a flicker of something—hope? Regret? You roll your eyes, trying to mask the turmoil inside.
"This is stalking, Jungkook. Just because you know where I work doesn’t mean you can show up whenever you feel like it." You find yourself trying to ignore the weight of his previous words, the way they linger in the air between you.
Jungkook sighs, frustration etched across his features. He knows he shouldn’t have come here; it’s weird, especially given the history between you two. What made him think you’d suddenly warm up to him after four years apart? He should have thought it through before leaping at the opportunity. But there’s something familiar about being around you, something that feels like home, even after all this time.
"I'm sorry," he says, and the words take you aback. You never thought you’d hear him apologize for anything. Your hands drop to your sides as you struggle to look anywhere but at him. "I shouldn’t have come here. I’m sorry. But I need your help." He doesn’t necessarily need your help, but he sure does want it. It’s not the apology you’ve been waiting for, but it stirs something deep within you.
"No, I’m not going to. Plus, I’m just a junior doctor," you say, your tone softening as you reluctantly engage in the conversation.
"You got your degree, didn’t you?" He asks, and you nod, feeling a flicker of pride. Before you can respond, he continues, "Practicing license?" Another nod. "Work experience?" His questions come in a rush, and you knit your brows together, feeling the pressure of his expectations.
"Yeah," you reply, glancing around your workplace, filled with patients, doctors, and nurses, all oblivious to the tension crackling between you two.
You shake your head, trying to ground yourself in reality. "What does that have to do with anything?"
"It’s all you need to testify and ensure your words aren’t null and void."
For a fleeting second, you consider it. Then you don’t.
"And honestly, why the hell would I want to help you?" You snap back, your arms folding across your chest once more, a barrier against the emotions threatening to spill over.
"You're not helping me; you're helping a little girl." His words freeze you in place, and suddenly, the weight of his plea sinks in. "Honestly, I don’t care if we’re good or not. I just need your help. She needs your help."
You don’t know if it’s his new method of guilt-tripping or the sincerity in his voice, but the statement has you straightening your back, your resolve wavering.
"Don’t guilt trip me," you lower your eyes at him, and he scoffs, a hint of amusement dancing in his gaze as he watches your expression shift.
"I'm not," he insists, and maybe it’s the cheeky smile that suddenly forms on his face that makes you shy under his gaze. Jungkook’s words have always had a way of getting to you, and you’re shocked to find that it still works. You guess it’s a good thing he became a lawyer; it suits him.
Jungkook sighs, his expression softening. "You know what? If you don’t want to help me, it’s alright. I get it—"
"I’ll help you." The words escape your lips before you can fully process them, and you can’t help but feel a mix of surprise and resignation.
You had spent more time than you wanted with Jungkook over the week, but it was just to prepare you. Once you helped him, you hoped he’d leave you alone and you could finally go your own way, trying to forget as much of him as you could.
"What should I wear?" you asked him over the phone. It reminded you of conversations you’d had before visiting his parents. You promised to only use his line for talking about the case, and that’s what you were doing; afterwards, you swore you were going to delete it.
"Wear what you want." He leaned back in his chair, listening to you talk while paying close attention.
"Even my underwear?" You tried to be sarcastic.
You could hear Jungkook’s soft chuckle, and it warmed your heart, making you blush. Thoughts of your late-night calls flooded your mind, but you quickly caught yourself.
Stop, you told yourself as you wiped the smile off your face.
"Not for the court." His index and middle fingers found their way to rubbing his lower lip. You could hear the sultriness in his voice, and his tone reminded you of something—ah, phone sex.
Why the hell are you thinking this? Shit.
"Wear what you want, just make it presentable." His tone shifted back to serious. Your silence made him think he had crossed a line. Honestly, he didn’t intend to; it just came so naturally to him.
You sighed. Jungkook waited for you to end the call, but you didn’t.
"Goodnight," you finally found the courage to say, ready to end the conversation.
"Goo—" Before he had a chance to respond, the line beeped, and you hung up.
The thought of hearing his voice and having it embedded in your mind once again was too much for you to handle. Hearing his voice was already overwhelming.
It was deeper, more mature, and sensu—
"Not possible for the injuries sustained to be accidental or self-inflicted," you assert, your voice steady and confident, just as Jungkook instructed you to be. Your gaze drifts to him, and you catch his encouraging smile, a small nod that sends a rush of warmth through you. It feels good to have him there, supporting you, but the past few days spent working on this case with him have left you in a whirlwind of emotions, unsure of what to feel.
"So, Mrs—sorry—Doctor," Jungkook’s counterpart interjects, the slip of your title not an accident but a tactic that has Jungkook sitting up straighter in his chair, adjusting his suit. He senses the tension in the air and doesn’t like where this is headed. "What you’re saying is that it’s not possible?"
"Y-yes." You can see how the slip-up has thrown you off balance; your tone falters, but you fight to maintain your confidence, even as you avoid Jungkook’s gaze.
"Not in this lifetime or the next?" The pressure mounts, and you feel the anxiety bubbling within you, your palms growing clammy as your heart races.
"I’ll never want to be with you again in this life or the next," you had yelled at Jungkook one night before your divorce, the memory echoing painfully in your mind.
What the hell is happening? Your heart constricts, and you feel the weight of the room pressing down on you.
"Yes," you say, your voice firmer now, desperate to move past this line of questioning. The only time you’ve ever been in a courtroom was to sign your divorce papers.
"And perhaps, do you think you’re not knowledgeable enough to determine this?" he presses, and you can feel the heat rising in your cheeks.
"No. If you’re not satisfied, I have many other doctors’ statements with me," you retort, a hint of cockiness creeping into your tone.
"Not necessary." He shrugs it off, turning to his table to pick up some papers. "But I do have to ask..."
A smirk plays on his lips, and Jungkook feels a knot of anxiety tighten in his stomach.
"Are you maybe a little biased in your opinion because of your close relationship with Counsel Jeon?"
You freeze, the words hitting you like a punch to the gut. Stay calm, Y/N.
"What do you mean?" you ask, your voice steady but your heart racing.
"Objection, Your Honor. What he’s asking is unnecessary," Jungkook interjects, his voice firm.
"Overruled."
Jungkook groans, frustration boiling beneath the surface. This isn’t what he wanted, but he should have expected it. He got too carried away enjoying your presence, even if he won’t acknowledge it.
"Go on, Counsel." Now you’re about to be grilled about something you’re not prepared for.
"Thank you, Your Honor. Now, Ms. or Mrs.," he jeers.
"I prefer Dr.," you snap back, irritation flaring as you feel your professionalism slipping.
"Doctor, are you married?"
You chuckle, the absurdity of the question almost making you laugh.
"In front of the court?" you tease, your tone a mix of annoyance and playfulness. Jungkook can’t help but feel a swell of pride at how you’re handling yourself. You’ve always had to defend yourself against his family, and he’s felt like a coward for not standing up for you when you needed it most.
"That’s not what I mean, and you know it."
You shrug your shoulders, insinuating otherwise, and take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself.
"No, I’m not."
"So, divorced? Because it was made known to me that you and Counsel Jeon had an intimate relationship." His words cut deep, and you bite your inner cheek, hoping you don’t draw blood. "Could your statement and judgment be influenced by the romance you two share, henceforth you help him and influence others to do so?"
Your mouth goes dry, and you take a moment to collect yourself, refusing to look at Jungkook, afraid of the look in his eyes that might make you break down.
"Jeon and I don’t share any sort of relationship outside of this courtroom," you say, your heart constricting painfully. Jungkook shifts in his seat, frustration simmering as he wishes he could react, but he knows he can’t.
"But you have, am I right?" he bellows, clinging to the idea. "Four years ago, married for two years, no children." With each word, you bite harder into your cheek, feeling the pressure mounting.
"Your Honor!" Jungkook tries to interject, but he’s ignored.
You glance at the judge, and Jungkook recognizes that look on your face —the same look you’d give him at family dinners, a silent plea for him to speak up, to defend you. But he never did, and the weight of that regret crushes him. Why was he such a coward? The determination to protect you surges within him, and he knows he can’t let this continue.
The judge looks at you, waiting for your answer.
So, you take a deep breath, steeling yourself against the onslaught of emotions.
"Yes," you finally admit, your voice barely above a whisper.
"Who ended the relationship?" he snaps back, the pressure mounting like a vice around your chest.
"I did," you respond quickly, the words spilling out before you can think.
"And was it because of something he did or something you did?"
"Objection, Your Honor!" Jungkook’s voice cuts through the tension, sounding more agitated than he intended. His assistant can see how unlike him he’s being; he’s never responded with this much emotion, but the stakes are too high.
"Skip the question, Counsel." The judge’s tone is firm, and Jungkook feels a flicker of satisfaction, but it’s not enough. He needs to get you out of this situation.
"Why did you end the relationship?" The defence attorney presses, and you can feel the weight of the room closing in on you.
"The typical—I wasn’t happy," you say blandly, though inside, the iron taste of anxiety lingers.
"Have you and Mr. Jeon rekindled that old flame?"
Would you call hanging out to prepare for this case rekindling? No. Would you call enjoying his presence and calling him for small things about the case rekindling a flame?
You almost laugh, but it’s a hollow sound.
"No," you reply, your voice steady.
"Then why are you helping him here today?"
"I'm not helping him; I'm helping the little girl."
You can see a smile appear on the defence attorney's face, a smugness that makes your skin crawl.
"Do you know her personally?" he asks, dripping with sarcasm, but you refuse to bite.
"No."
"Then why help? Why should you care about a stranger?"
"I don’t need to know a person to care for them. That’s one of the reasons I am a doctor. She’s just a child, and I have an obligation to defend her when I can," you say, your voice rising with conviction.
But beneath that conviction, a deeper feeling wells up inside you—a longing to be defended yourself. All your life, you’ve faced hellfire from your parents and others, and all you ever wished for was someone to stand up for you. Maybe that’s why Jungkook had stolen your heart in high school; he was there for you, defending you from bullies and creeps. But when it came to his parents, he had failed you.
"Is it the girl you care about or Counsel Jeon?" The defence attorney’s voice cuts through your thoughts, and frustration bubbles to the surface. Your heart races, and you feel the walls closing in, your breath coming in shallow gasps. You might just have a panic attack.
Jungkook sees it, his palms sweating as he fights the urge to intervene.
"Tell the court, Doctor. Tell them how you still hold feelings for him and are doing this to get back with him. You don’t care about that little girl; you care about Jeon and helping him because you still love him, and your findings are biased and inaccurate."
His words press down on you, and you feel yourself slipping. In this moment, you’re bound to say anything—true or false—just to escape this suffocating situation. Jungkook is uncomfortable in his seat, knowing he can’t react how he wants to, but something in him still wants to know what you might say.
"I don’t love him; I was young and stupid when I married him, and it was a mistake," you rush out, frustration spilling over as you fight to free yourself from these overwhelming feelings. You don’t want to break down here, not in front of everyone, not in front of Jungkook.
You’re on the verge of tears.
The defence attorney opens his mouth to speak, but Jungkook’s voice cuts through again.
"Your Honor, my witness is uncomfortable and has done what she came to do. Anything else is unnecessary." His tone is fed up, and he’s not about to let this continue. If the judge says no, he’ll pull you out of here, consequences be damned. He can’t bear to watch you suffer like this. He’s hurt you enough in your life, and he blames himself for forcing you into this situation.
"I’ll agree with Counsel on this," the judge finally says. "The witness is free from the box."
You let out a sigh of relief, but it’s hard to move. The weight of the moment lingers, and you feel the tears well up in your eyes, threatening to spill over. You turn on your heel and storm out of the courtroom, not daring to glance back at Jungkook. The rush of emotions is overwhelming, and you can feel the tears welling up, blurring your vision as you push through the door.
"Y/N, wait!" Jungkook calls after you, his voice cutting through the chaos in your mind. You can hear his footsteps echoing behind you, but you don’t stop. You need to get away, to breathe, to escape the suffocating atmosphere of the courtroom and the weight of the past that hangs between you.
Once you’re in a clear area, he catches up to you, grabbing your arm gently but firmly. "I can’t just let you go like this."
You pull away, your heart racing. "I came here to help, not to get grilled about something I’m still trying to forget, Jungkook." Your voice trembles, the tears finally spilling down your cheeks. You wipe them away angrily, but they keep coming, each drop a reminder of the pain you’ve been trying to suppress.
Jungkook’s heart breaks at the sight of you, vulnerable and raw. He’s seen you cry before, but this feels different—more intense, more real. "I know, and I’m sorry. That’s how the court is. But it’s my fault," he says, stepping closer, his voice low and earnest.
"If I had known, I would’ve—"
"You would’ve what? Defended me? There’s nothing you’ve ever done to defend me unless it was to soothe your own ego or pride," you spit out, the venom in your words reflecting the hurt that has festered for so long.
"Y/N…" He pleads, searching for the right words, but they elude him. You’re the only person in this world who can silence him, whether it’s with your sweetness or your rage. Normally, he’d have a comeback for anyone else, but with you, he’s left speechless.
"Don’t say anything. I’ve helped you, and I honestly hope you win—not for you, but for that little girl." You take a shaky breath, trying to regain your composure. "But please, never come to my work again or even call. Please." Your voice softens at the end, a desperate plea that cuts through the anger.
His heart aches at your words. You’re asking him to leave you alone, but deep down, he knows you don’t really mean it. Your heart is pleading for him to hold you, to tell you that everything will be okay, that he’s there to protect you. But he can’t say that now—not when you’re so hurt.
He doesn’t fight back, not like he usually would. This time, it’s strategic. He knows you’re angry, and there’s nothing he can say to change that. He respects your wishes, but he won’t let you go—not this time. He’s let his cowardice and lack of effort keep you from him for too long, and he’s realized he doesn’t want to be away from you anymore.
"Truly trouble in paradise?" The voice that had once torn down your walls now cuts through the tension like a knife, and Jungkook can think of nothing but the seething rage boiling inside him.
"You’re a fucking piece of shit," Jungkook growls, his voice heavy and thick with fury. He barely registers the curious glances from those around him; all he can focus on is the man standing before him, the source of his torment.
"Being good doesn’t pay, Jeon," the man sneers, a smug grin plastered across his face. In an instant, Jungkook’s anger ignites, and he lunges forward, wrapping his fist around the man’s collar, the force of his grip wiping the smile off his face. The adrenaline surges through him, amplifying his strength and fury. He could easily crush this man, and the thought is intoxicating.
But just as he’s about to unleash his pent-up rage, his assistant, Jaehyun, steps in, urgency lacing his voice. "Jungkook, please." He grips Jungkook’s arm, trying to pull him back from the brink. Jungkook’s jaw clenches tighter, his eyes locked onto the man beneath him, a tempest of anger and pain swirling within. He’s ready to say fuck it and end this right here, right now. He could do it, and a dark part of him wants to.
But he knows better. This isn’t just about him; it’s about you. It’s about the mess that has become your lives, and he can’t let his anger spiral out of control—not for himself, not for anyone, and especially not for you.
With a surge of frustration, he shoves the man backward, watching as he stumbles but manages to catch himself, quickly dusting off his shirt. The sight only fuels Jungkook’s rage further.
"Fuck you, you piece of shit," Jungkook snarls one last time, his voice low and dangerous.
The man smirks, a cruel glint in his eyes. "I’m not the one with a failed marriage, Jeon." The words hang in the air, a taunt that cuts deeper than any physical blow. Jungkook feels the heat of humiliation wash over him, a reminder of everything he’s lost.
"Where’s she?" he demands, his hand running through his hair in a desperate attempt to regain control.
"She’s left. She got into a cab," an intern reports, the words hitting Jungkook like a punch to the gut.
"Fuck," he breathes, his fingers tangling in his slicked-back hair, ruining the carefully styled look. The realization crashes over him like a tidal wave—he’s losing you, and the thought sends a fresh wave of panic coursing through his veins.
"It's not that serious, Y/N. That's just how my mother talks," Jungkook says as you step into your shared apartment, the familiar space feeling more like a prison than a home. It’s decent, sure, but right now, it feels suffocating.
"Insulting and degrading me is how she talks? Because I don't see her talking to you or Yujin like that," you retort, your voice sharp and laced with hurt. Jungkook’s jaw clenches at the comparison, the tension in the room thickening as he grapples with your words.
"Maybe she's still salty about me disobeying her," he mutters, making excuses for her behavior, as if that somehow justifies the way she treats you.
"That's no fucking excuse," you snap, your voice tight, hands swinging in frustration. The anger bubbling inside you is a mix of hurt and disbelief.
"Mind how you talk to me, Y/N," he barks, turning to face you, his tone harsh and commanding.
"I'll talk however I want to, seeing that you let your mother do the same," you shoot back, watching as he freezes mid-motion, the tension palpable.
You had just returned from Jungkook’s parents' place for dinner, and it had been a nightmare. You had to bite your tongue, suppressing the snarky remarks that threatened to spill out, knowing you’d be blamed for everything regardless. The only one who had stepped in was Jungkook’s father, and while you appreciated it, it felt like a hollow gesture in the face of his mother’s relentless barbs.
"She's my mother! What do you want me to say?" he hisses, frustration etched across his face.
"I WANT YOU TO FUCKING DEFEND ME!" The words burst from your lips, raw and desperate. You rub your face, trying to rein in your emotions, lowering your tone to avoid a noise complaint. "Defend me, Jungkook. That's all I want." Your voice trembles, and you can feel the tears welling up, threatening to spill over.
"I don't want to look like a joke in front of your family every single time we visit," you continue, your heart racing as you lay bare your feelings to someone who seems to be slipping further away. "Being made a fool of, even more, when you don’t say anything."
"That’s how she is, Y/N, please," he says, defending her yet again, and it feels like a knife twisting in your gut.
"Only to me?" You place a hand on your chest, trying to emphasize your pain. "I get it; I’m not the best or perfect daughter-in-law, but does that mean I have to get insulted? It’s not like I’ve ever done anything to her." You search his eyes for understanding, but all you see is a wall. Maybe he’s just fallen out of love with you. Maybe he doesn’t care anymore.
"The problem is that you always see it from your side. You're so selfish!" And there it is—his words hit you like a slap, igniting a fire of indignation within you.
"I'm selfish? What have I ever done to be called selfish?" Tears stream down your face, but you refuse to let them silence you.
"THIS! Right here. Your bratty and victim behaviour." He throws the shirt he had on onto the bed, changing into another one, as if he can shed the weight of this conversation along with his clothes.
"You're just a coward, and you'll never grow to defend anyone, honestly. Between the two of us, you're the selfish one," you say, your voice breaking as you give up trying. You’ve fought so hard, but it’s exhausting when the other person won’t even meet you halfway.
"Say whatever you want, Y/N," he replies, his tone dismissive, never acknowledging that you might be right.
"I'm just going to sleep over at my mom's," you say, the words feeling like a surrender.
"Go ahead," he mutters, not even bothering to turn and face you. The silence that follows is deafening, a chasm of unspoken words and unresolved feelings stretching between you.
You both stand there, two people in a shared space yet feeling more alone than ever, the weight of your unaddressed pain hanging heavily in the air. As you turn to leave, you can’t shake the feeling that this might be the beginning of the end.
"You sure you’re okay? Never thought you’d come here by yourself," Jimin says, handing Jungkook a private bottle. He never expected to find himself here alone either, but things change, and feelings hurt more than he cares to admit.
"Yeah, just need some alone time," Jungkook replies, his voice flat, devoid of any life. Jimin stares at him, unsure of how to approach the situation, the weight of unspoken words hanging heavily between them.
"Work?" Jimin tries, hoping to pry a little more out of him.
"Yeah. Let’s say that." Jungkook’s response is vague, and he knows he’s not convincing anyone. But Jimin doesn’t press further, even though a million questions swirl in his mind.
He feels a pang of sympathy for his friend, especially not knowing how to help. Jungkook has been quiet and standoffish lately, but tonight feels particularly off. He swears he’s fine, but the facade is crumbling, and Jimin can see it.
"I'm sorry I won’t be with you all night; I’ve got a date." Jimin feels guilty for leaving Jungkook alone in the club, but he can’t bail. It’s not like Jungkook wants company anyway.
"You’re not gonna ask me about her?" Jimin tries to lighten the mood, but Jungkook’s expression remains stoic. He wouldn’t want anything more than to drown out the running thoughts in his head. "Fine, I’ll tell you." Jimin smirks, the thought of describing you igniting a flicker of excitement in him.
"Her name’s Y/N. She’s so gorgeous, and I invited her to hang out with me for the night." The moment your name leaves Jimin’s mouth, Jungkook’s heart drops. What the fuck did he just say? Should he be pissed? The jealousy ignites within him, a burning spite that roars louder than the music in the club. But should he even feel this way? It’s been two weeks since the court incident, and he’s been hating himself since. He hopes you’re doing better than he is.
"She’s so hard to get a hold of because she’s busy with work or something," Jimin continues, oblivious to the storm brewing inside Jungkook. With each word, Jungkook feels himself slipping further into a dark place, the alcohol numbing his senses but amplifying his emotions.
"Or maybe she doesn’t want you," Jimin adds, taking a swig from his drink. Jungkook’s mind races. You and Jimin? The thought sends a wave of anger crashing over him. He hates how things went down between you two, how he’s been unable to think about anything else. He just wants to fix it so badly, but maybe going out with Jimin would make you happy.
Jungkook knows he’s the problem, and he’s understood that for some time now. But how can he show you that he’s learned and changed? Letting you go off with someone else? Maybe that’s what he deserves.
He wishes he could say something to Jimin, tell him not to do anything with his wife—you. But he’s not in a position to make demands. It would be fair to tell Jimin who you are to him, right? But the thought of it feels like a weight too heavy to bear. He lacks the mental strength to confront the reality of his feelings.
"No, she definitely wants me. I wanna dine her and wine her, treat her good, you know?" Jimin’s words grate on Jungkook’s nerves, irritation bubbling to the surface.
"Maybe you should get going," Jungkook says, his tone harsher than he intended, the frustration spilling over.
"You’re right." Jimin takes the hint, perhaps realizing he shouldn’t be talking about himself right now. "Enjoy yourself." He walks away, leaving Jungkook to wallow in his thoughts, his jaw locked and his hand tightly wrapped around his glass.
As the music thumps around him, Jungkook’s mind spirals. He can’t shake the image of you with Jimin, the thought gnawing at him like a relentless itch. He takes a deep breath, trying to steady himself, but the jealousy and regret swirl within him, a tempest he can’t escape.
Soon, he finds himself wandering around the bar, lost in a haze of emotions, searching for something—anything—to distract him from the reality of what he’s losing. The night stretches on, and with each passing moment, the weight of his choices presses down harder, leaving him feeling more alone than ever.
"Just sign here," your lawyer says, sliding the paperwork across the table to Jungkook. He feels as if the air has been sucked from the room, and he can’t breathe. He holds his breath until the reality of the moment crashes down on him, forcing him to gasp for air. It feels like he’s dying anyway, suffocating under the weight of what’s about to happen.
On the other side of the table, you haven’t been breathing since those damn papers were printed out and handed to you. You know you’ve made stupid choices in your life, but now you’re left questioning which is more foolish: marrying at such a young age or choosing to divorce Jungkook.
"So that’s it?" he asks, his voice barely above a whisper as he drags the pen across the dotted line. He can’t bring himself to look at you, his gaze fixated on your lawyer instead. Deep down, he had a feeling this would happen, but why wasn’t he prepared to fight for you? If you were so eager to end it, maybe you didn’t want to make it work, and he wasn’t going to force you. But the bitterness of it all gnaws at him, and he can’t help but hate you for this. There’s so much he despises about himself in this moment.
"Yes," your lawyer replies, holding the papers closer, as if they’re a lifeline. A heavy, suffocating weight washes over you as you stare at Jungkook, who can’t even muster the strength to meet your gaze or try to stop you from doing this. Anger and bitterness swell within you, so overwhelming that you can’t bear to be in his presence any longer. You turn and walk out, already having taken all your things from your shared home. There’s no need to see him again.
He didn’t even fight. The words echo in your mind as your lawyer follows behind you, leading you to their car. You glance back at the entrance door, half-expecting him to come after you, to call your name, to plead with you to stay.
But he doesn’t.
Something keeps Jungkook frozen in place, hands trembling and breath coming in labored gasps. Is this how it feels to be heartbroken? He never thought it would happen, not to him, not to you two. You were each other’s first love, always together, and never had anything this grand happen before. All he can think about is how you gave up on what you had, how you threw everything away.
Selfish.
"Get a grip of yourself," Taehyung says, his eyes focused on the baby he’s rocking and feeding. "She'll cool down." Taehyung is never serious enough to grasp the gravity of things, which makes Jungkook roll his eyes so far back he might just see the moon.
"I really fucked up," he says for the hundredth time since that night, as if repeating it will somehow make it less true. "I was so selfish." The words sink deeper into his skin each time he utters them, like a bad tattoo he can’t scrub off. He had spent so long thinking it was your fault, ignoring his own feelings and the situation, never reflecting on it until now. "All she wanted was for me to care." He buries his head in his palms, closing his eyes to wallow in the darkness of his misery.
"I'm so fucking shitty," he continues, and Taehyung listens, trying to block the baby’s ears from Jungkook’s foul language. The baby coos, blissfully unaware of the emotional turmoil swirling around her.
"It’s pissing me off that this is when I’m actually seeing it. I spent so much time trying to ignore it." Jungkook can’t seem to find a comfortable position on Taehyung’s couch, shuffling around like a toddler who just drank too much juice.
"That’s why it’s good to reflect," Taehyung says, not really helping but still managing to sound wise. The baby lets out a little gurgle, and Taehyung quickly rocks her to quiet her down. His wife had gone out to buy some things and hang out with her friends, leaving Taehyung more than happy to babysit.
"But I’ve changed, haven’t I?" Jungkook stares at Taehyung, who’s clearly lost in his own world but still hears the question.
"It’s shocking," Taehyung replies, deadpan. From what he’s seen, Jungkook has definitely evolved from his childish self. His childish self would’ve either hidden under the bed, afraid of his own feelings, or yelled out in rebellion against them. Taehyung can actually see how grown his friend has become, but that doesn’t mean he’s fully synthesized maturity.
"How am I going to prove that to her?" Jungkook asks, his voice tinged with desperation.
"I don’t know," Taehyung deadpans, and Jungkook shoots him a look that could curdle milk.
"Thanks for the help, buddy," Jungkook mutters, feeling like he’s talking to a wall.
Taehyung shrugs, clearly not interested in baby-feeding Jungkook the answers. He’s just an ear, and he did his part.
"Did I tell you that Jimin invited her there, and that’s the only reason I got to see her? Fucking universe," Jungkook continues to ramble on. He’s usually quiet these days, so should Taehyung be happy that his friend is talking or antsy that he’s never shutting up?
"You did tell him?" Taehyung asks, finally meeting Jungkook’s eyes.
"No. I couldn’t. I don’t know why."
“Does she know?”
“Doubt it.”
Taehyung groans and chuckles, but low enough not to stir the baby. "Do you think they’ll..."
Jungkook lifts a brow at his friend. "What? Hook up?" The thought itches at his core, and now that he’s thinking about it, he wishes he had told Jimin. He can still call, right? "I hope fucking not," he spits out, bitterness dripping from his words.
"He doesn’t know, and you didn’t tell him, so you can’t blame them." Taehyung’s right, and it bugs Jungkook even more. He feels so stupid.
Jimin was a friend Jungkook had after your divorce, and since he never saw you, you never got to meet him. Jungkook and anyone else never talked about you, so Jimin was lost at the fact that Jungkook had been married to you, though he did know that the guy had been divorced after a drunk night of Taehyung talking nonsense.
"I’m so fucking stupid, stupid," Jungkook grumbles like a child, and Taehyung laughs, now holding the infant over his shoulder to burp her.
"Spent so many years being bitter and hating her when it was my fucking fault." The realizations keep dawning on him like a bad sitcom.
"Dick move."
"You’re not helping," Jungkook snaps, but Taehyung just laughs at the thought that he’s here to help him. Right now, he’s just playing the role of the listener so that Jungkook doesn’t look crazy for talking to himself and making these realizations. It’s not that he doesn’t want to help or advise his friend; it’s just that there’s not much he can do except listen.
"Look, I’m not on your side; I’m on the side of whatever’s gonna get you back together," Taehyung states, his tone serious for a moment.
"She won’t even talk to me, Tae," Jungkook pouts, but it goes unnoticed by his friend, who’s too busy celebrating the successful burp of the baby.
"You don’t know that," Taehyung replies, still rocking the baby gently.
"Maybe I don’t want her to," Jungkook mutters, a hint of bitterness creeping into his voice. "Maybe I want her to just keep ignoring me and move on with her life." Something in him wishes he could leave you alone to set you free from himself, but that was the same mindset that got him divorced in the first place. Maybe if he fought for you, you’d be in a better place. So that’s what he wants to do—fight for you this time.
"I was really such a bad husband. So stupid and naive. I’d be mad at me too," he admits, his voice heavy with regret.
Taehyung continues to walk around, rocking the baby. "Maybe instead of telling me this, you should tell her."
"She doesn’t even want to see me! How am I gonna do that?" Jungkook exclaims, throwing his hands up in exasperation. He genuinely doesn’t know, and he’s never known a foolproof plan that could help him. He’s just hoping the universe can lend a helping hand, seeing that it’s been invested in their relationship anyway.
"I don’t know, but just remember to not be a creep," Taehyung advises, a teasing grin spreading across his face.
"Thanks for the tip, Dr. Phil," Jungkook retorts, rolling his eyes. "I’ll just show up at her door with flowers and a serenade. What could go wrong?"
"Hey, if you can pull off a serenade without scaring her away, I’d pay to see that," Taehyung chuckles, and the baby lets out a tiny sound, as if she’s in on the joke.
"So how are you feeling?" Rosie asks, noticing how deeply you're staring into your coffee, as if it holds the answers to all your questions.
You continue to stir it absentmindedly, letting out a sigh. Not even the cozy warmth of the café seems to ease the turmoil inside you.
"To be honest, I don’t know," you reply, releasing an empty chuckle. All you've been thinking about is Jungkook. You’re not even sure what about him, but the fact that he occupies your mind so much is starting to annoy you. And Rosie can see it too.
"Do you think talking to him could make it better?" she asks, taking a cautious sip of her drink, her eyes searching yours for a hint of clarity.
You manage a smile and finally meet her gaze. "I don’t even want to think about talking to him."
"Yn," Rosie whines, leaning in slightly. "You need to. Not for him, but for you."
You sigh again, feeling the weight of her words. "It’s just really hard to do." You stare off into the distance, lost in thought about what you really want to do.
What is right?
"Do you think you still have feelings for him?" she treads lightly, gauging your reaction.
"I don’t know," you admit, your voice barely above a whisper. "Seeing him has definitely made me think a lot, but that doesn’t change anything. I don’t even know if he’s changed as a person."
"If he has, would you get back with him?" She raises a brow, fully focused on you now, her curiosity piqued.
You throw her an undecided look, your brow furrowing in confusion.
A smile grows on her face. "You would, wouldn’t you?" she laughs, and you shake your head, letting out a nervous laugh of your own.
You're blushing, and it feels like a betrayal to your own feelings.
"I never said that," you protest, trying to sound firm but failing to hide the uncertainty in your voice.
"It’s not about what you said; it’s about what you’ve shown," she counters, her tone teasing yet insightful.
With a shrug and a heavy silence, the conversation hangs in the air. You’ve been asking yourself that same question too, and honestly, you aren’t sure of the answer. You just don’t want to think about it at all.
"I'd love to, Tae, thank you," you reply, your voice a little shaky. Taehyung called you unexpectedly, and when you saw his name flash on your screen, a wave of anxiety washed over you. Part of you feared he was calling to ask about what happened between you and Jungkook, and you honestly wouldn’t know where to begin if that were the case. So, you’re relieved when he doesn’t bring it up.
"When?" you ask, trying to sound casual, but your heart races. You never thought he was serious about the dinner plans he made, let alone that he would actually remember them. But he did, and once he got the chance, he made sure to reserve a table for four and call you over. He didn’t mention the reservation for four part, though; he probably thought it would be better to let you find out when you arrived, so you wouldn’t run away.
"Will Sunday be good for you?" he asks, his voice sounding professional, which makes you assume he’s at work. It’s Wednesday, so that makes sense.
"Yeah, sounds perfect," you agree, feeling a mix of excitement and anxiety bubbling in your stomach. It’s just you, Taehyung, and his wife—there’s really nothing to be anxious about, right?
As Sunday approaches, you find yourself in a bit of a panic. It’s one of those fancy restaurants, and the exceptional service is only proof of how upscale it is. You struggle to find something decent to wear, your nerves making it hard to focus. After a good search in Rosie’s closet, you finally find the perfect dress. Perfect for who? You, of course.
Rosie is a little skeptical about you going to dinner with Taehyung, but you explain that he’s still a good friend and you wouldn’t want to decline the offer because that would offend him. Plus, it’s not like you don’t want to be there; you don’t mind. After all, it’s Jungkook who’s the problem, not Taehyung.
She reluctantly accepts your reasoning, but along with her questions, she expresses her concern that Jungkook might be there. That’s a point of contention. You swear to her that Jungkook wouldn’t be there, and she swears that he would. You don’t want to acknowledge the idea, but the fear of the possibility still lingers. If Jungkook was going to be there, Taehyung would have mentioned it, right?
As you walk into the restaurant, the server gestures for you to hand him your jacket, and you do so, your hands trembling slightly. He then directs you to the table where you’ll be seated once you tell him the name the reservation is under.
You walk through the room, your long, form-fitting dress hugging your curves. The rich red color complements your skin beautifully, and you can’t help but feel a little more confident. You really like this dress and doubt you’ll be giving it back. The thin straps rest delicately on your shoulders, and the straight neckline keeps your chest modest yet elegant. You hope you’re not over or underdressed.
When you finally spot Taehyung, he nods over to you, and you let out a sigh of relief, realizing you’re neither under nor overdressed. His wife is wearing a cream satin dress, but you can’t determine the length since she’s seated and hidden by the table. Taehyung has a warm smile on his face, dressed in a white button-up with the sleeves rolled up, looking effortlessly charming. You walk toward them with a smile and a little excitement bubbling inside you.
That’s until Taehyung turns to talk to someone else. His wife is sitting on his other side, so if it’s not her he’s talking to, then…
Your body freezes for a second, and you contemplate turning around right now. The door isn’t so far away; you could make a run for it. You can feel your joints go rigid, but somehow, you find your way back to your chair. You let out a sigh as you take your seat, trying to shake off the tension. Jungkook had wanted to pull your chair out for you, but you brushed him off, and he was polite enough to accept your refusal.
You try to contain the rapid beating of your heart, which is now racing because of the unexpected presence of the man sitting next to you. Straightening your back and rubbing your palms together, you attempt to maintain the light and warm ambiance at the table. The last thing you want is for Jungkook’s presence to affect how you present yourself tonight.
Turning to greet Taehyung’s wife, Jian, you feel a flicker of relief since she’s the only one at the table you’re not annoyed with. Taehyung really brought you here knowing Jungkook would be here too. Was he in on it, or did he come here unaware of your presence? Are you both being set up right now? Is this some sort of intervention? You’re aware of how much Taehyung likes you and Jungkook together, and while you appreciate his concern, some things are just meant to be forgotten, buried.
“How are you?” you ask Jian, trying to sound cheerful despite the turmoil inside you. She greets you back with the same enthusiasm.
“You look so beautiful! How’s the baby?” You couldn’t help but ask; something about the doctor in you wanted to know.
“Perfect. My mom’s been a huge help,” she replies, her bright smile lighting up her face as she gracefully brushes her long, straight hair out of her eyes.
“That’s lovely,” you say, genuinely pleased for her.
“You look gorgeous too,” she compliments, and you can’t help but feel your cheeks heat up, a blush creeping in.
“I try,” you respond, attempting to stay modest. You don’t think you’re all that, but you do make an effort from time to time. Jungkook, on the other hand, would disagree; he thinks (knows) you look good in whatever you choose to wear, even when you don’t try. However, he’s not going to argue that you look stunning tonight. He could barely keep his eyes off you as you walked to the table. You couldn’t see him, but he could see you, and you looked great. He wanted to die, but Taehyung had to remind him to pull himself together.
It was then that your body shifted from fluid to solid. You had noticed him, and you didn’t seem happy at all. Jungkook felt a pang in his chest when you stopped him from pulling your chair out for you. He’s not going to blame you for it, though.
“It’s nice to see you out of your scrubs,” Taehyung says, and you can’t help but lower your eyes at him. He notices your glare and understands the reason for it. The little smirk he gives you makes you want to smack him right across the face. He knows exactly what he’s doing.
You chuckle, but it’s bitter.
“I’m sorry if I kept you all waiting,” you apologize, playing with your fingers as they rest in your lap. They hadn’t ordered yet, probably waiting for you, and your overthinking takes over, soon turning into guilt. You did try your best to get here on time, and you did, but you still say it anyway. Maybe it’s your internal tactic to lessen your nerves.
“No, you didn’t. Jungkook just came before you,” Taehyung says, clearly eager to push the agenda.
When he remembered he wanted to make plans for dinner, he told Jungkook and planned on bringing him too so they could talk. But right now, Jungkook looks like he’s going to lose his head, his eyes glued to the menu like a child.
“Mm,” is all you can manage as the awkwardness begins to grow, thickening the air around you. You can feel Jungkook’s presence beside you, and it’s both comforting and unsettling. You steal a glance at him, and he’s still focused on the menu, but you can sense the tension radiating off him.
The conversation around the table continues, but you find it hard to engage. Your mind is racing, and you can’t shake the feeling that this dinner is about to take a turn you’re not prepared for. You take a sip of your drink, hoping it will calm your nerves, but it only amplifies the fluttering in your stomach.
"She's such a good and peaceful baby, honestly," Jian exclaims with joy, and you can’t help but smile at how happy she is to talk about her little one. Taehyung stares at her, completely enamored with everything about her.
"I think she takes that from Jian," he adds, and laughter fills the air as everyone agrees. Between the couple, Jian is definitely the more relaxed and laid-back one. It’s funny how in your relationship with Jungkook, it had been the opposite. He was the laid-back one while you were the more outgoing, which is one of the reasons you got along so well with Taehyung. But for some reason, in this situation where you’d normally be talkative and engaged, you feel off and out of it. Jungkook notices your silence and curses himself for even coming; he feels like he’s ruined your night. He should have just left. Or not come at all.
You all order your food, each of you choosing what you want. You’re not entirely sure about some of the items on the menu, but the only person you could ask is the one you’re trying to avoid speaking to. So, you go for something you think will go best with how you’re feeling tonight.
Soon, the food arrives, one by one. Jungkook watches as your plate is placed in front of you. It’s not because he envies the meal—though it does look good—but because of the yellow garnishes on top that you hadn’t noticed. Just before the plate touches the table, Jungkook intercepts. “These have pineapples on them?” he asks the waiter, his tone serious.
“Yes, sir, it’s used for garnishing,” the waiter replies, and you watch as Jungkook investigates the young man, his face stern and his tone confident.
“Please bring her one without pineapples; she’s allergic,” he insists, and that’s all you can think about. Your heart flutters at how he remembers something about you, or maybe it’s just the effect of being close to pineapples.
How could he forget? Just because you aren’t together doesn’t mean he’s going to forget everything about you. How could he forget the little things about you that kept him up all night?
“You’re still allergic, right?” he asks, and you nod, finally acknowledging his presence for the first time during the night. You hadn’t realized that the meal you ordered was garnished with fancy-cut pineapples that you never would have noticed. You appreciate that he remembered and was able to spot it; otherwise, the night would have been even worse.
The way he stares at you, worry coating his eyes, makes you want to melt. You’ve just realized how much you missed this part of Jungkook—the one who would lead and speak out for you, the one who got you through those high school days.
“Sure, I’ll be right back,” the waiter says, bowing slightly before walking away with your plate.
Before your eyes move to your lap, they land on Jungkook, who’s staring right into them and welcoming them with a smile. You quickly look away, clearing your throat, feeling a rush of heat flood your cheeks.
Fuck, does he want to make this harder for you? Why is this so much more difficult than it should be? Your heart hasn’t stopped racing since you saw him, and you wish you could just pull it out and burn it. Why the hell is it beating so fast around him?
“That would’ve been bad,” you awkwardly chuckle, and Jungkook hums, feeling warmth engulf him. It’s a warmth mixed with a little confidence—the confidence to talk to you. Though he doesn’t show it, Jungkook is no better. He can feel his collared shirt grow tighter, even with one button undone. It’s as if he’s not comfortable in his own skin and just wants to rip out of it and beg you to talk to him. It’s tiring to just play it cool.
You wait for your food, and as you do, you notice that Jungkook hasn’t touched his. He’s simply looking around, not doing a very good job of it.
You want to lecture him, tell him to just eat—that’s what you’d do if you were still together. But you’re not, and the thought makes your heart go rigid. Why is it that the thought of not being with Jungkook is the only thing that stops your beating heart?
You feel bad. Maybe you’re being too difficult, and you’re a little harsh with him. Are you being too harsh? Or just looking out for yourself? Even through that, it doesn’t stop you from ignoring him. Even if you wanted to talk to him, what would you say?
The silence stretches between you, thick and heavy, and you can feel the weight of unspoken words hanging in the air. You glance at Jungkook again, and for a moment, your eyes meet. There’s a flicker of something in his gaze—an unspoken question, a longing, perhaps. It makes your heart race even faster, and you quickly look away, focusing on the tablecloth instead. The intricate patterns seem to swirl and dance, a distraction from the tension that’s building between you.
The waiter returns with your new plate, setting it down gently in front of you. “Here you go, one without pineapples,” he says, and you offer him a grateful smile. Jungkook watches as you pick up your fork, and you can feel his eyes on you, a weight that both comforts and unnerves you.
“Thank you,” you say softly, and for a moment, you think you see a hint of relief in Jungkook’s expression. It’s fleeting, but it’s there, and it makes you wonder if he’s been holding his breath this whole time.
“So Jungkook won his case,” Taehyung says after a moment, clearing the air for a new topic. It’s something you don’t want to think about, but you can’t help but feel a flicker of pride for him.
“That’s nice,” Jian replies, and you nod in agreement. You’re genuinely glad he won. It’s nice that at least he’s helping other people, even if it doesn’t fix your own relationship.
“And I heard a special someone had something to do with it,” Taehyung adds cheekily, his gaze shifting to you. You roll your eyes with a light chuckle, feeling a mix of embarrassment and amusement. He’s really going hard at it.
“Tae, shut up,” Jungkook snaps, his cheeks flushing slightly. “Maybe if I throw a stick, he’d leave,” he whispers, and you can’t help but laugh at that. Jungkook lifts his eyes to you, listening to the sound of your melodious chuckle that he never realized he missed. Seeing you laugh at his joke gives him a little more confidence about all of this, a glimmer of hope.
“It was fine being in court for something other than—” you start, but then you cut off your statement, not finding it appropriate to finish. Thankfully, no one decides to question you on it, and you’re relieved. Jungkook knows you well, and having been there, he understands what the end of that sentence would sound like.
“But at the end, it got really suffocating,” you smirk, knowing only Jungkook would get it. He shifts in his seat, moving a little closer to you, and you can feel the warmth radiating from him.
“I’m sorry about that again,” he says, his eyes focused on you, but you can’t bring yourself to meet his gaze. Instead, you use your peripheral vision to watch his features soften as he speaks.
“Lawyers are heartless,” you say in a light-hearted tone, the words feeling directed at Jungkook, but he’ll never know that.
You all laugh, the sound filling the space between you, but it feels different now—charged with unspoken words and lingering emotions.
“Not our Kookie, though,” Taehyung chimes in, grinning. “Very un-heartless.”
You chuckle, but there’s a weight to your words. “Yeah, very.” You finally turn your eyes to meet Jungkook’s, and in that moment, your words feel empty, but your eyes aren’t. They hold a depth of feeling that you can’t quite articulate, a mixture of nostalgia, longing, and something else—something you’re not ready to name.
Jungkook’s expression shifts as he holds your gaze, and for a heartbeat, the world around you fades away. It’s just the two of you, caught in a moment that feels both familiar and foreign. You can see the flicker of emotions in his eyes, and it makes your heart race.
After some time, Jungkook just decides to say fuck it. He can talk to a large crowd, but with you, he feels paralyzed. You’re just one person—one person with his heart on the line. He knows he has to say something to you, and he just hopes you’re open to talking.
Do you even feel anything? Are you feeling the way he is? Does he have an effect on you like you have on him? Because if you don’t, then he’s going to feel like a fool. He just hopes you feel the same way. In high school, you were the one worried if he felt the same, but now it’s him.
After all, you could have moved on. You could be better and not need him. But unlike the image of you he has in his mind, he’s not okay. Not okay with this distance. He hates it.
“How are you enjoying your food?” he asks, turning to you while Taehyung and Jian talk about whatever.
“Good, it’s nice to come out once in a while,” you reply. It’s not a one-word answer, and he’ll take it. Is it his imagination, or do you seem interested in talking to him?
“How often are you busy?” he gulps, “with work, of course.” He sounds stupid and nervous, but you find it cute. Why do you find it cute? It’s really hard not to feel this way about someone you already know so well.
“Enough to make me want to pluck my eyes out,” you laugh, and he smiles. Even though you don’t make eye contact with him, he can feel you warming up to him. “But recently, work has been light,” you add, talking to him like you would when he asked you about your classes in high school.
“You like it?” he asks, hoping it’s not weird, but he can’t take his eyes off you. He just can’t.
“I do,” you reply, and he feels his heart thaw like frozen meat.
“T—that’s good,” he stammers, taking a bite of his food to stop the smile that threatens to spread across his face.
All of this is nice, but you can’t help but feel overwhelmed. You feel confused. Is he just talking to you because you’re the only one he has to talk to, or is he actually interested? It’s like being promised something only for the promise to be broken. You don’t want to get your hopes up. Not again.
“Please, excuse me,” you say, your head held down as you stand up from the table.
“Sure,” he replies, but soon grows worried. He brushes it off, telling himself he’s overthinking it. It’s going well; you’re talking to him, and that’s what matters. Baby steps.
You leave for the bathroom, needing some air that isn’t filled with Jungkook’s scent, which is now engraved in your sinuses and will probably haunt you. While in the bathroom, you pull out your phone and text Jimin, asking if you’re still on for later. You had made plans with him, and you did want to go, but now that you’re staring at the text, you wonder if what you’re doing is right.
It’s not like you and Jungkook are getting back together, and whatever this is between you two feels complicated. It just feels wrong. Maybe you should just cancel. Jimin’s a good guy, though, and he doesn’t deserve this. It’s better for him to find someone who’s sure and knows what she wants—not you, sitting in the bathroom contemplating where you and your ex stand.
“Stop being so awkward, man,” Taehyung says, playfully pulling at Jungkook’s leg under the table.
“I’m trying,” Jungkook whines, his frustration evident. “It’s hard.”
“You can talk up a whole court, but you can’t with Y/N?” Taehyung teases, raising an eyebrow.
“Plus, it’s not that hard,” Jian chimes in, pulling Jungkook’s attention away from his spiraling thoughts. She should be the only one he takes advice from, he thinks. “Just show up and put in effort in the conversation, and she’ll warm up to you.”
“See how she warmed up to you when you asked about her work?” Taehyung adds, and Jungkook starts to get it. “All Y/N wants is for you to show up and be there to listen and care.” Taehyung feels like a relationship counsellor right now; he should get paid for this. If their relationship works out, Jungkook should definitely pay him.
Jian places a hand on Taehyung’s shoulder to shut him up, a knowing smile on her face. “But don’t forget to be the guy she fell in love with,” she adds, her tone serious yet encouraging.
Jungkook sighs, feeling the weight of their words. He knows he needs to be himself, the version of him that made you smile, the one who could make you laugh until your sides hurt. But the fear of messing things up again looms over him like a dark cloud.
“I think I’ll get that one,” you say, pointing at the dish you’ve chosen.
“Alright,” the waiter notes it down, his pen scratching against the notepad.
Jungkook leans in closer, a playful glint in his eyes. “They have banana pudding on the menu,” he whispers, knowing how much you love it.
“Really?” Your face lights up with excitement as you turn to the waiter. “How good is your banana pudding?”
“The best,” he boasts with a confident grin.
“Then I’ll have that instead,” you say, your smile widening as you place your order.
Once the waiter walks away, you glance back at Jungkook, who has been momentarily distracted by the pianist playing softly in the corner. But as soon as he feels your gaze on him, his eyes shift to meet yours. The moment feels electric, and you find yourself wanting to look away, but you hold your ground, challenging yourself to stay connected.
Jungkook watches you softly, waiting for you to speak. “You remember how much I like banana pudding?” you ask, your voice light and teasing. It feels a bit childish, and you want to slap yourself for it, but Jungkook seems to be enjoying this playful banter.
“Of course,” he replies, his familiar bunny smile spreading across his face. “Remember that time you almost killed me for eating the last one?”
You burst into laughter, the memory flooding back. “You should’ve known better,” you say, shaking your head in mock disapproval.
“I should’ve,” he admits, chuckling along with you.
Taehyung, sitting across the table, can’t help but feel giddy as he watches the two of you smile at each other. It’s like a scene from a romantic movie, and he’s here for it. The atmosphere around the table feels lighter, filled with warmth and nostalgia.
“Y/N, how did you travel?” Jian asks, reminding you that the night has to come to an end.
“Uber,” you reply, a hint of reluctance in your voice.
“So you’re going back with an Uber?” she clarifies, raising an eyebrow.
“Yeah,” you say, because what other options do you have?
Taehyung turns to look at Jungkook, who seems as lost as ever. “Maybe Jungkook can drop you off,” he suggests, a hopeful tone in his voice.
Why hadn’t you thought of that? You smile sheepishly at the idea, but it makes you sweat a little. “No, I’m good. Don’t want to burden you,” you say, trying to brush it off.
“You’re not a burden,” Jungkook says immediately, his voice firm as he hears you call yourself that. You’d never be a burden to him. “Plus, it’s late, and Ubers aren’t all that safe. Let me drive you home.”
You want to say, “How sure are you that you’ll be safe with him?” but it would just sound stupid. Jungkook has never once made you feel unsafe. In fact, the thought of being alone with him feels comforting. It’d be a good chance to save some money—or more like have more time with Jungkook. “Okay, sure,” you say, not wanting to argue.
“My car’s over there,” Jungkook points to the opposite side of the parking lot, and you realize you should probably say your goodbyes now.
“It was nice seeing you, Y/N,” Jian says as she pulls you into a hug. She hopes you and Jungkook get back together so that she can spend more time with you.
“Nice to see you too,” you hug her back. “Say hi to the baby for me.”
“If she’ll understand,” Jian laughs.
“I’m sure Taehyung will communicate,” you throw Taehyung a side-eye, and he narrows his eyes back at you, feigning offense.
He hugs you tightly. “Thanks for coming,” he says, and the embrace gives you flashbacks of the time he hugged you at the hospital.
You pat his back. “No problem. I enjoyed it.”
“I’ll call you; please don’t avoid me,” he says, his voice earnest.
You raise your hands in defense. “I never do.” But as you think about it, would you ignore him if he called? It would be weird, right? Especially not knowing where you and Jungkook are going. If you and Jungkook don’t work out (you can’t believe you’re even thinking about it), does that mean you wouldn’t have to talk to Taehyung or Jian again?
“Goodnight, bro,” Taehyung says to Jungkook.
“Goodnight,” Jungkook replies.
“Take her straight home, okay?” Taehyung lifts a warning finger to Jungkook, and you and he scoff.
“Taehyung, let’s go,” Jian says, pulling him away, and you all laugh. If Taehyung hadn’t pushed Jungkook, would he even be in this position? A position of opportunity to make up for everything or at least show you that he’s trying.
Once the goodbyes are over, you walk to Jungkook’s car, and you can’t help but bulge your eyes at how beautiful it is. He opens the door for you. “Thank you,” you say politely. Just when you think he’s about to close the door, he leans in.
“I’m sorry, can I take a call?” he asks, and the height difference, along with the way he looks down at you, makes you want to melt into a puddle.
“Don’t let me stop you,” you manage to say, trying to keep up with your racing mind.
You watch him walk in front of the car and further away. You can’t help but wonder who could be on the other end. Work? Taehyung? Or maybe a girlfriend? You never did find out if he’s single or if he’s been out. You’re sure he has. It’s not like you weren’t. But you feel the same type of incompletion when you spend time with other people.
The thought of him talking to some girlfriend right now sends a swarm of moths fluttering in your stomach. You won’t ask; it’s none of your business.
No matter how much your mind wanders, you can’t deny that you’re ogling how huge Jungkook has gotten. His shoulders, his muscles, which his shirt does a bad job of hiding. He’s built like he eats, sleeps, and drinks the gym. And damn, you’re getting flustered just by looking at him.
Watching how he talks on the phone, how he places his tattooed hand into his pocket, makes him look so incredibly hot. Wait, tattoos? How did you miss them? You squint to get a closer look. He actually does have them, and they make him even more attractive.
What’s wrong with you? Get it together. You’re literally drooling. When you laugh at yourself, it must have been loud because Jungkook turns to look at you. You smile, trying to prove to him that you’re okay, and he smiles back. Why do you feel so giddy? It’s just a smile.
You allow him to finish his call, which doesn’t last long. He walks back to the car, sliding into the driver’s seat, his thighs constricting against the material of his pants.
“You ready to go?” he asks, his voice low and casual, but you can feel the tension in the air.
“Yeah,” you reply, your throat suddenly dry.
He starts the car, and the engine’s purr matches the rhythm of your racing heart. As you drive through the city, the night lights paint your face in a soft glow, and you take a moment to admire the view outside the window. The city feels alive, vibrant, and you can’t help but feel a sense of nostalgia wash over you.
Jungkook glances over at you, his gaze lingering a moment longer than necessary. “You look great tonight,” he says, almost too quietly, but you catch it. His fingers drum against the steering wheel, a nervous habit you’ve come to recognize.
“Thanks,” you say, feeling your cheeks heat up, but the red light from the traffic stop hides it well.
“You still have that necklace?” he asks, his eyes flicking to the dainty silver chain around your neck.
“Yeah, it’s nice,” you reply, instinctively holding onto it a little longer. He had gotten it for you during your honeymoon phase, but you stopped wearing it when your relationship got rocky. You hadn’t even realized you put it on for tonight.
“I enjoyed seeing you tonight,” he says, his heart pounding as he takes a chance. He did enjoy being in your presence, but did you feel the same? He can’t help but question where you stand. Do you want what he does? But he can’t ask.
Your focus drifts back to the window as you enjoy the ambiance of his car. How many women has he had in here? Were they just as at peace as you are right now? You don’t like to bother yourself with the thought, but your brain and heart are in tandem, and they won’t let it go.
The thought of him being with someone else ignites a flicker of jealousy within you. You breathe in and out, trying to calm yourself. You can’t be upset; it’s not your place. You’ve never considered yourself a jealous person. You were always sure of Jungkook’s love for you, and so was he. So there wasn’t much to be jealous of. But once your marriage and relationship began to falter, you doubted everything—the kisses, the touches, the time spent together, the ‘I love you’s. It all became foggy, the memories a blur.
And it wasn’t because they weren’t there or that you didn’t still feel deeply for him, but because there was no one to assure you they actually existed. Were you lying to yourself about Jungkook’s love? Was he lying to you?
Why would he marry you then?
You had no anchor to keep you there, only questions—questions that would never be answered at the time and questions you’d never bring yourself to ask now.
“We don’t have to talk, you know,” you say, the sentence coming out in a whisper, laced with fear, not anger. Fear that if you talk, you might end up saying more than you want to.
So, he just drives. The silence and tension consume you like fire. Not even Jimin’s text asking when he can pick you up can bring you any joy that it would have if Jungkook never existed. But he does; he exists so vividly, like a looming cloud carrying the sign of a storm—a storm that’s about to consume all the walls you’ve been building for the past four years.
Jimin: When can I pick you up?
Jungkook sees you stare at your phone like you’re about to throw it out the window. He wants to ask who you’re talking to that’s got your face in a knot, but he chooses to keep his eyes on the road this time. He can only imagine who’s texting you at this hour. Jimin? He grips the wheel tighter.
Y/N: Don’t.
Jimin: ???
Y/N: Don’t come.
Y/N: You’re a great guy, Jimin. And I’m sure you’ll be able to find someone who’s in a more stable place for you. But it’s not me. I’m really sorry. I enjoyed my time with you, but I just have a lot going on.
Jimin: An ex?
You pause and glance at Jungkook, who has one hand on the wheel and the other resting on the window sill. He doesn’t turn back to look at you.
You: I guess so.
Not really, more like just yourself.
You: I’m really sorry I got you into this. You’re a good guy.
Jimin: You’re good too. Thanks for not leading me on.
Jimin: Wish you the best.
You feel sick. You and Jimin hadn’t gone far, barely held hands . But he was hoping for more, and you feel terrible for it. You liked him; he was definitely someone you’d go for if, well… if the man driving you home right now wasn’t so much on your mind.
You: You too.
The temperature in the car shifts drastically. One moment, you’re comfortable in the warmth of the moment, and the next, you feel a chill creeping in, as if the universe is reminding you that this night is coming to an end. Just a little longer, you think. You want to hold onto this feeling, this connection, but you know it’s fleeting.
“Thanks for driving,” you say as you pull into your apartment complex, trying to break the silence that feels heavier than before.
“Not a problem,” Jungkook replies, his voice steady, but you can sense the tension beneath it. The night is over, right? It’s over. When you leave now, you’ll never see him again. Good. It’s good, right?
But it’s not over for him. As you walk toward your building, you turn to find him following closely behind you.
“Where are you going?” you ask, half-expecting him to say he has a girlfriend living in the same building that he wants to visit, and that’s the only reason he even drove you here. Your mind races with insecurities.
“Walking you up to your apartment,” he says, his tone firm yet gentle. He looks nervous, and you can see it in the way he fidgets with his hands.
“I’ll be fine,” you insist, pulling your coat closer to your body as you watch him stand there, not budging.
Just as you have a stare-down, the bush to your far left stirs. Someone stumbles out, clearly intoxicated, struggling to stand. The universe must not be on your side. The neighborhood doesn’t have drunkards roaming around much, or ever. But tonight, it seems, must be your lucky day.
You turn to Jungkook, and he gives you a look that tells you he’s not backing down.
“For my peace of mind?” he asks, his voice softening, and it almost makes you want to give in.
“Fine,” you relent, feeling a mix of annoyance and gratitude.
With the same tension and silence, you both step into the elevator to your place. As the numbers light up, Jungkook speaks, “This is a nice place.” He genuinely seems to admire it, and you can tell he’s trying to make conversation. It’s good to know you’re in a safe place.
“Yeah,” you reply, but your mind is racing. What kind of place does he live in? A mansion? A penthouse? Or just a simple apartment? What’s his décor like if he ever got that far?
The elevator dings, and the doors slide open. You step out, and Jungkook follows closely behind. The hallway feels long, and the silence stretches between you, thick with unspoken words.
You tap in your code and step into your warm space, the familiar scent of home wrapping around you like a comforting blanket. Still standing by the door is Jungkook, and still holding the door open is you. Is this what you two have become? Cowards. Liars. Pretenders?
“Um, I guess this is goodnight,” you say, your eyes glued to the hinges, avoiding the weight of his gaze. How long are you going to hold on?
“I guess so,” he replies, his voice distant as he stares into your home absentmindedly. You can feel the tension thickening the air between you, and it’s suffocating. Jungkook knows he won’t get another chance to see you again if he leaves without saying anything. There’s only so far the universe can go for him.
“Can I talk to you, though?” he asks, his voice softer now, almost pleading.
You sigh, feeling the familiar frustration bubbling up. “Not this again, Jungkook.” Isn’t this what you want, though? For him to talk, to communicate? What are you fighting?
“It’s alright that your friend grilled me in court; you don’t have to apologize,” you add, trying to keep your tone steady.
“It’s not fine,” he insists, his eyes narrowing slightly, determination flickering in his gaze. “He shouldn’t have. He was just trying to poke at me, and it’s not fair that you had to be in the middle.”
You don’t speak, mainly because you want to see how far this will go and how much he has to say. You can feel the weight of his words hanging in the air, and you’re not sure if you want to catch them or let them fall.
“I know I’ve been a shithouse of a guy to you, especially in the past,” he continues, his voice cracking slightly. “But I’ve changed, Y/N, and I hope you can see that.”
Do you? Do you see how his walls break down to welcome you? He could get on his knees to show you, and the thought sends a shiver down your spine. He holds onto your door for stability, as if it’s the only thing keeping him grounded.
“Jungkook…” you start, but the words get caught in your throat. You want to believe him, to see the change he claims to have made, but the scars of the past are still fresh in your mind.
“Just hear me out,” he urges, his voice low and earnest. “I know I messed up. I know I hurt you, and I can’t take that back. But I want to try. I want to be better for you, for us. I miss you, Y/N. I miss us.”
"A lot of things should have been done differently by me in our relationship and i acknowledge that." When he finishes his sentences, he looks at you. He’s eyes are filled with anger but not to you, to the memory of that day and all the guilt he feels.
"Thank you." You don’t know what more to say, it’s not your turn to talk. So, you just hold your arms to your body.
"It's what I should’ve done, its what I always should've done." He bows his head. He gives up on holding back. He’s tired, and it’s fucked for him to hide from his solace.
Sniffle.
If it’s not you he can cry to, then who?
"Jungkook,-" your heart sinks when you hear him sniffle. He’s crying. You can be distant all you want but you can’t take seeing him cry.
You close the space between you and cup his cheek. You’re tired of fighting too.
He leans into your touch and slowly wraps his hand around your wrist, praying you keep it right there.
His wide eyes stare down at you filled with tears that threaten to fall.
"I'm sorry yn. I'm really sorry and I wish I could go back in time and Change things and be better for you, for us." They fall, yours too.
"I wasn't good and I understand why you did what you did.” He doesn’t even want to call by name. “It was me, I was the selfish one and I regret it." he pulls your hand to bring it to his lips and place a kiss on your pulse. "I regret it so fucking bad yn"
"come here.” you pull him inside and shut the door.
“I was so was stupid. And I feel shitty for even trying to justify it but I was stupid. And a dick." He kisses your wrist as you use your other hand to push back the hair that sticks to his tear stained face.
"We were both stupid." You won’t say you didn’t have your bad moments.
"Not you. You were always right and I wish I listened to you and maybe we'd be in a better position."
He closes into you, bringing your foreheads together. Instincts. You just have to do what feels natural.
"Maybe"
“Definitely,” he whispers, brushing his nose against yours, and your mouth parts instinctively. “I’m really sorry, bunny. I really am.”
The nickname he used when you were together hangs in the air, a bittersweet reminder of what once was. It used to make your heart race, but now it feels like a ghost of a feeling you can’t quite grasp anymore.
your mind has no clue where to place its home.
You breathe in the warmth of each other’s presence, lips hovering just a breath apart, the tension palpable. He gently pulls your wrist behind you, guiding your arm to wrap around his neck, while his hand finds its place on your waist. Your palm rests against his heart, feeling its frantic rhythm, a silent plea for connection. You’re wrinkling his shirt, but it’s the last thing on his mind.
His gaze is locked onto your lips, a silent yearning begging to be fulfilled. What’s stopping him? Is this what you want? Do you want him back like he wants you? The questions swirl in your mind, a tempest of doubt and desire. Have you thought about him every single day since you last saw each other? No—since the day you divorced. Did you ever truly stop thinking about the moments you shared? The late-night kisses, the laughter, the way you both craved each other’s presence like air.
His lower lip brushes against yours, and a shiver runs down your spine, igniting a flicker of longing deep within you. “I want to kiss you so bad,” he pleads, his voice thick with emotion. “Can I kiss you?”
A nod is all you can produce. You want to, you’re pulled to.
And so, he does. The moment your lips meet, it’s like a wave of relief crashing over you. He’s your relief, your solace in a world that feels chaotic and uncertain. As your lips intertwine, you wish for nothing more than to stay in this moment forever, to linger in the warmth of his embrace.
You taste exactly as he remembers—like peace, if peace had a flavor. Sweet and intoxicating, he doesn’t want to part from you. He deepens the kiss, pulling you even closer by your waist, and your hand crumples his shirt tighter, as if anchoring yourself to him.
God, you missed this. You missed him. A tear rolls down your cheek, a mix of joy and sorrow, a release of all the pent-up emotions you’ve been holding back.
But then, as if the universe is cruelly reminding you of reality, he pulls away. for a kiss that was supposed to give you an answer it brings more doubt.
The air thick with unspoken words.
“I missed you so much."
You would say you have been the confused type. From what your university major should be to who you want to be, you’ve never known. The path ahead has always felt murky, a winding road with no clear destination. But one thing you did know was that you wanted to be with Jungkook.
That's what younger you wanted anyway.
The dreams you spun in your mind were filled with laughter, love, and the warmth of his embrace. But now, as you sit here, grappling with the weight of adulthood, you find yourself asking what the adult version of you truly wants.
Amidst all the turmoil, what you really desire is to be happy—to be set free from the guilt of your previous choices. You want to shed the layers of regret that have built up over the years, the “what ifs” that haunt your thoughts like shadows.
Younger you always thought Jungkook would be the one to give you that happiness. You really wanted him to be that. The thought of his smile, the way he made you feel alive, filled you with hope. But now, as you reflect on everything that has transpired, you’d be lying to yourself if you said the thought of being with him again didn’t scare you.
The fear is palpable, a tight knot in your stomach. What if you opened your heart to him again, only to find that the past still lingers, that the wounds haven’t healed? What if the love you once shared has transformed into something unrecognizable? The idea of vulnerability feels daunting, and the stakes seem higher now than they ever were before.
You think about the late-night conversations, the dreams you shared, and the way he used to look at you as if you were the only person in the world. But you also remember the pain, the misunderstandings, and the way everything fell apart. It’s a delicate balance, and you’re not sure if you’re ready to tip the scales in either direction.
As you sit in the quiet of your thoughts, you realize that the journey to happiness isn’t just about finding the right person; it’s about finding yourself first. You need to understand what you truly want, independent of anyone else. Can you be happy on your own? Can you forgive yourself for the choices you’ve made?
Maybe all you need is to forgive yourslef and him.
The questions swirl in your mind, and you know that the answers won’t come easily. But one thing is clear: you owe it to yourself to face the truth.
Maybe it’s time to take a step back and reflect on what you need, not just what you want. You need to find your own happiness, to reclaim your identity outside of Jungkook and the love you once shared.
And yet, as you think about him, a flicker of hope ignites within you. Perhaps there’s a way to navigate this complicated landscape, to find a balance between your past and your present. Maybe, just maybe, you can rediscover the love you once had, but this time with a clearer understanding of who you are and what you truly want. But the hope is only a maere flicker of light. not enough to brighten the darkenss you've been swallowed into.
“i don’t think can.” You cry on Rosie’s lap as she pets your hair. She just listens.
“And you don’t have to.”
You sob.
“why did he have to come back.” You’ve been this confused in a while. During the years you were sure you hated jungkook. But now you realize you were just sad. Why did he have to come back into your life and why did he have to kiss you.
“you don’t have to get back with him.” She repeats.
“ I know. But why do i want to but not want to again.”
“it’s because you’re just a little hopeful.” You are aren’t you? “is that so bad.”
Rosie shakes her head when your teary eyes look up at her. “nope. He was the love of your life. Your freaking first one.”
“But it’s time to grow up.”
Even if you did work it out, how the hell would you marry him again. Would you even get as far as to marrying again. You'd hate to get back together only to fail again.
How would you face his parents. And what if they still hate you. How would you go on.
It really is time to grow up.
“Thanks for coming.” You smile.
"No problem.” He pulls out his chair, the sound of it scraping against the floor echoing.
you planned on having a simple conversation in a cafe. which makes it easier for both of you to leave if things get awkward.
“Honestly, I never expected you to reach out.” The words slip out,.
You had planned to ghost him, to just forget everything. But after talking to Rosie, she encouraged you to talk to him. To seek closure instead of running away. You'd be missing the point if you did ghost him.
“Just need to get some stuff off my chest.” You chuckle awkwardly, the air stiffens immediately after.
Jungkook’s eyes widen, his heart racing at the possible implication of your words.
Before you can gather your thoughts, he cuts in, “I just want to apologize for kissing you that night.”
You shake your head, nostalgia and discomfort washing over you. Why does the memory of that moment feel weird now? “You don’t have to. I wanted it too.” you can't help but feel guilty for it. “Um, I just wanted to clear something up about that too.”
“I feel like I told you something I shouldn’t have that night.” His brow furrows in confusion, and you can see the gears turning in his mind. “I won’t lie; I did miss the feeling, but it also felt like a lie.”
He taps his fingers nervously on his thigh.
“What do you mean?” he asks, voice only able to ask questions
“I mean, there’s nothing here.” You gesture between the two of you. “I appreciate your apology, but it doesn’t change much.”
You avoid his gaze, but his eyes remain locked on yours.
“I’m still hurt, honestly.” When your eyes finally meet his, you can barely seem to read them. If he could hold you, you know he would. “And we’d be lying to each other if we said things could be fixed just like that.”
It feels like a death sentence, and you’re the judge. Sentencing him to his fate.
He sighs, not able to form any thoughts. “I understand.” He does, but the understanding comes with a hurt.
“Because at the end of the day, I’d have to meet your parents again, and I’m sure they wouldn’t love me overnight.” Your chuckle is sweet but bitter. “I don’t want to put myself in that position again.”
He inhales sharply, the air thick with regrets. He’s always been prepared to face judgment, but this—this is a different kind. “I’m sorry that they hurt you so much. And that I did too.”
“I know you are.” You want to rush through this, to just get over with it. “I just wanted to clear things up and make sure we’re on the same page.”
Neither of you bothers to order anything; the thought of food feels heavy and unappetizing.
“Yeah, we definitely are.” He laughs, but the sound is sorrowful.
He knew it all along. There’s only so far, the universe can go for him.
It seems Taehyung was wrong; the universe didn’t bring you together to get back together but to part ways on a better note. The hatred and disdain that once was your relationship have only served to hurt you both.
“Let’s end things on a good note this time, Jungkook.” Your voice is soft, almost a whisper.
Meeting you again has him understanding what he once didn't realize, the mistakes he made, and now he seeks to apologize for them. There are so many “I wish” statements he could say, but isn’t about that. Sometimes, it’s simply just too late.
It’s a reality he has to face now.
“Maybe that’s all we needed,” he jokes, but the laughter feels uncomfortable.
You chuckle lightly, “I guess so.” You can feel the tension in your chest begin to ease, the heaviness lifting just a little. His presence, once a source of turmoil, now feels more tolerable, like a bittersweet memory you can finally face.
"I won’t lie; I’ll have to miss you all over again." His smile is simple.
As you slide out of your seat, he stands too, and the world around you fade into the background. It’s only when you reach his car that you find the courage to pull him into a hug. His warm arms wrap around you, and the familiar scent of his cologne pulls you in like a comforting blanket.
"I’ll always love you; you know." His voice is muffled against your coat, and the words hang in the cold air.
"Jungkook, don’t do that to yourself." You pull back slightly, just enough to meet his gaze, but he squeezes you tighter, afraid to let go.
Maybe he crossed a line he shouldn’t have. Maybe if he hadn’t followed you up to your apartment that night, if he hadn’t kissed you, if he hadn’t over-apologized—
“Don’t overthink it,” you whisper, trying to soothe his possible thoughts.
“It’s not your fault. It’s no one’s fault, okay?” You try to keep a smile on your face. “Be glad we got to redo this and at least not hate each other anymore.”
“That’s if you don’t hate me.” You flash him a teasing smile, hoping to lighten the mood.
he smiles too.
“I actually do hate you,” he jokes.
“I hate you too."
A/N: it is what it is. PAAAAAIN.
#fanfic#jungkook#jungkook x reader#jeon jungguk#jungkook x y/n#bts#jeon jungkook#jungkook au#jeon jeongguk#jungkook fanfic#jeongguk smut#bts jeongguk#jeongguk x reader#jeongguk fic#jungkook scenarios#jungkook angst#jungkook imagine#jungkook x you#jungkook fic#jungkook fluff#jungkook oneshot#keen li#bts angst#angst
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boop
summary: booping them + their reactions type of post: headcanons characters: third years additional info: is short, platonic or romantic, reader is gender neutral author's note: this would've been good to post for the tumblr april fool's event but I missed out so you're getting it now instead!
𝐓𝐫𝐞𝐲 𝐂𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 ˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗
hmm... okay!
trey often navigates his interactions with other students based on his interactions with his siblings
there's an order to human behavior, after all
especially with the underclassmen shenanigans (he's really seen it all at this point; don't ask)
none of his siblings, however, have walked up to him unannounced and booped his nose
not yet, at least?
it seems to make you happy though, so he just smiles
half of his job as vice housewarden is "going along with it"
he's pretty used to nonsense
𝐂𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐃𝐢𝐚𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐝 ˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗
he's editing something on his phone the first time you try and doesn't even notice it
...and the second time, and the third
it becomes a sort of routine for you
tentatively trying to see how many times you can get away with it before he finally notices and says something
and it only spirals from there, of course
you'll up to him while he's talking to someone else, boop him, and walk away
(much to the other person's confusion)
does he notice? yeah, of course
do you need to know that he notices? ...maybe not
he likes the attention, just let him have this one
𝐋𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐚 𝐊𝐢𝐧���𝐬𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐫 ⋆˚⸙˖°༄✩⊹
he gnaws your hand off
okay, not really. too messy for him
(and the consequences would be such a headache to deal with...)
but he is all grumpy because you woke him up for that
"What was that supposed to be? -_- Don't do that again,"
rolls over and goes back to sleep
you're lucky he reacted as nonchalantly as he did tbh, lions don't like being pet, and he could've kicked you out of his room in a heartbeat for that
(maybe you get a special pass to be annoying)
note to you: don't do that again
𝐑𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐇𝐮𝐧𝐭 ˚⊹˚₊🕊 ˚✧ ₊
boops you back right away
does he necessarily know what that means? no, but he'll find out soon enough anyway
and based off your body language and expression it seems like a gesture of affection
...which he's all too happy to return
(he's so excited to be touching you affectionately he could explode)
now every time you see each other you end up going back and forth for hours
"boop!" "boop!" "boop!"
that's one sure way to give Vil a headache
(you may or may not end up temporarily banned from Pomefiore for disturbing the peace)
𝐕𝐢𝐥 𝐒𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐞𝐧𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐭 ˚⊹˚₊🕊 ˚✧ ₊
you'd assume he gets annoyed, right?
well, he's a little surprised at first (people just don't go around touching him, after all)
then he just smiles
"Remember what we said about asking before touching, hm?"
you're lucky he thinks you're cute
(if not a little strange)
like, so lucky
congratulations on being the only human on earth who gets away with casually touching his face like that
𝐈𝐝𝐢𝐚 𝐒𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐝 ₊✩‧₊˚⊹༄˚₊모‧₊
well. what do you expect
his eyes widen and his face (and hair) go pink and he internally freaks out (but externally just stands there)
"Um... What was that for?"
Idia might be a little more familiar with the conventions of a boop than anyone else
it's what you do to adorable little animals, right? like kitties and puppies?
so... why are you doing it to him?
if you say you "just felt like it" he might believe you
if you say it's because you think he's cute he will be avoiding you for the rest of the month
good luck!
𝐌𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐮𝐬 𝐃𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐚 ✩⁺₊°⊹ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ☽。°⊹
blinks.
has zero clue what you meant by that
but you seem happy with yourself so it couldn't have been a bad thing, right?
"I'm unfamiliar with that gesture. Is that a greeting from your home?"
you explain that it's a sort of affection you show towards cute things
"Oh, well... you're quite brave. I'm honored,"
he's definitely all sunshine and rainbows for the rest of the week
he's all but giggling and kicking his feet back and forth
no one really questions him
and he doesn't really explain
(if Sebek finds out you booped the heir to the throne of Briar Valley as if he were a kitty cat he will gnaw your hand off)
𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐚 𝐕𝐚𝐧𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐞 ✩⁺₊°⊹ ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 ☽。°⊹
pleasantly surprised, doesn't even question it
he is adorable, after all, he can't blame you for wanting to be affectionate with him
boops you back, of course
after all, aren't you just the cutest thing too?
if you try to walk away after booping him he will find you to return the favor
will somehow make it a competitive sport
waiting for you around corners, hiding in every nook and cranny so that he might catch you by surprise and boop you
(he is totally keeping count of who's ahead)
it makes the school a warzone for like a solid week before Silver's pleas to "please be normal about the prefect" finally work
(AKA Lilia gets bored of it and finds another way to be close to you)
#queued#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#trey clover x reader#cater diamond x reader#leona kingscholar x reader#rook hunt x reader#vil schoenheit x reader#idia shroud x reader#malleus draconia x reader#lilia vanrouge x reader
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PR Stunt (Only, Right?) | Sukuna/M!Reader
W/C: 6.9K (oh god lol) #NSFW, fingering, implied fucking, bottom!reader, top!sukuna, angst, fluff, smut, happy ending, Sukuna owns a body shop, reader is an actor, kinda meet cute, ABO dynamics, mpreg, yes there are always babies involved because i love dad sukuna, surprise baby, sukuna is a dickhead (what else is new), Gojo is an actor, Getou is a manager/agent, Toji is a stunt coordinator, Jin is a teacher tags: @kamote-kuneho @better-imagination-9 @flowersatwork @watyousayin
“Did you sleep with (L. Name) (F. Name)?”
The question caught Sukuna off guard; normally, Uraume didn't inquire into his personal life in regards to who he had and hadn't slept with. They were a friend, yes, but moreover they were the bookkeeper and helped with securing clients and arranging meetings–celebrities and their managers were fucks that Sukuna didn't like negotiating with. Best to leave the yapping to someone with a cooler head.
“Where the hell did that come from?” Sukuna asked as he rolled out from under the newest commissioned vehicle.
Uraume walked to him, iPad in hand, and turned it to him, stone cold.
Sukuna sat up straighter and squinted at the screen, annoyed. You’d probably just made up some salacious rumour and spread it throughout your friend circles; or worse, you wanted revenge on him for something he probably definitely did. In that case, Sukuna could somewhat understand. But still–
(Name) putting on weight? What’s happening to the former bombshell babe of Japan?!
Pregnant with a baby boy?! The secret's out!
(Name) returns to the stage after giving birth to a baby boy–but who is the father?
(Name) driving a Ryoumen Sukuna rescue vehicle?! Could he be the deadbeat dad we've been looking for?
Sukuna sucked his teeth after skimming over the article titles presented to him.
“...No proof.”
“Ah. Then please explain this,” Uraume requested, still polite as ever, as they flicked to an additional few images the scumbag paparazzi had caught of you.
One was the car mentioned. Sukuna remembered it like it was yesterday–the joy of restoring a Porsche 911 back into its former glory was unmatched. You happily paid for all the parts and too often swung by to see the progress being made on the old thing. Obviously, Sukuna was more than happy to oblige.
The next was of you holding a little nugget of a baby against your chest as you walked down a street in Shibuya. Nothing too damning, nothing too inspirational.
But the last one–
“The fuck?” Sukuna mumbled as he snatched the iPad from Uraume’s hands and zoomed in on the now-toddler sitting with you in that damn Porsche, grinning brightly beside his mum while you ruffled his hair. His very, very pink hair.
Sukuna took a breath while he thought. He didn't have to think too hard, though, not when he still dreamed about you and the short-lived fling between the two of you.
“A Porsche 911, huh?” Sukuna grinned as he looked over the rusted beater of a car. He could still see scraps of its former glory, of the beautiful thing she used to be. Heaven knows she would've become an irreparable hunk of junk if you hadn't bought it from a scrapyard.
“Yep.” You beamed. “So you think you can make her pretty again?”
“You kidding? I'd pay you to let me fix this thing, baby.” Sukuna caught sight of your security stepping forward, but you waved them off without a second thought.
Sukuna smirked. “But it’s not gonna be cheap.”
You nodded. “Well, do what you have to. I'll pay whatever you need, handsome.”
“Yeah?” Sukuna asked, looking your neatly-manicured appearance up and down; you were dressed like you were meeting someone of great importance (and you were, obviously), with your hair groomed perfectly, outfit fit for a premiere, skin flawless.
“Mhm. And I tip well.” you looked him up and down in kind, grinning as you bit at the nub of your sunglasses.
“Done.”
Every time you came to check on his progress, genuine excitement flooding in your motormouthed words, you'd go home with him and fuck him silly.
And now, you were the momma to his baby. Allegedly.
“I–so what the fuck does this have to do with anything?” Sukuna ran a frustrated hand through his hair after Uraume took the tablet back. “Bitch isn't asking for anything, he's not asking me to be his public fucking baby daddy, not asking me to pay for nothing?”
“No,” Uraume conceded, “But he and his PR managers have reached out concerning this.”
The man groaned and stood. “Fucking hell. Can't stand fucking PR teams. The fuck did they want?”
“They want to make a statement about Touma's father.”
Sukuna froze.
“Touma's a good name for a boy, right?”
You asked the question so suddenly, so out of nowhere in the quiet of the afterglow. The city lights sparkled and winked at you both through the towering windows keeping you safe from the outside world. In hindsight, Sukuna would wonder if the city was excited for him. For you.
“What, for a mutt?” Sukuna drawled, puffing on a blunt while he played with your hair and drowned in the tingles left in the wake of fingers drawing circles on his bare chest.
“For a kid,” you chastised with a laugh. “I like Touma. Or Touka for a girl. Ayato's nice, too. Maybe Kazue.”
“You better not be pregnant.”
“I'm not, I'm not. I'm just getting baby fever, I guess.” You hummed and left a sweet kiss against his tan skin. “I guess being around a big, bad boy like you's got me feeling domestic.”
Sukuna laughed, dazed and happy. “You wanna ruin this pretty lil’ body for a fucking kid? Be my guest. Just don't come looking for a booty call after you've ruined yourself like that.”
“Oh, don't worry,” you cooed. “I won't.”
Man. Man.
“A statement.”
“In other words–”
“I'm not the fucking father.”
“This might be a good way to get Yorozu off your case,” Uraume suggested, and Sukuna perked up.
“Right. She fuckin’ hates kids.”
“So, if you were to have a son, and it's revealed you've been quietly trying to make things work behind the scenes with (Name), then hypothetically–”
“I'll take the runt.”
Truth is out–Ryoumen Sukuna is the father, (Name) tells fans on social media!
Sukuna hated seeing that shit. The circus celebrities had to dance through used to be funny until he somehow got swept up into it. Until he suddenly had a baby boy that looked so much like him and so much like you.
He spent too much time on your socials, scrolling through promotion posts and photos of you at red carpet events and premieres–and then he remembered you had a private account. One that you said he could follow. One that he never followed.
Sukuna rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling as he sulked in bed. Was he really about to sacrifice his pride for this? Was he seriously gonna request to follow your personal account just moments after articles dropped and tweets were sent about him being the baby daddy? Could his pride take it?
Fuck me. This shit is highschool.
He requested to follow, and not even a minute later, you approved it.
That had him interested. Did you want him to follow? Did you want him to be part of his little guy's life? Were you feeling a rush of anxiety and excitement like he was right now?
“Get over it, you fucking idiot,” he mumbled to himself before scrolling through your photos.
There was so much more here. So many photos of you pregnant, of Touma when he was so ridiculously itty bitty, of when you were recovering in the hospital, looking worn out and exhausted, but still beaming as you held your little boy.
There were photos of his first birthday and the cute…rustic cake you'd apparently made yourself. Your agent, Getou, was there, as was one of your fellow agency mates, Gojo, along with some other folks Sukuna did and didn't recognize.
Of course, his boy–your boy lit up the centre, eyes glittering with the reflection of sparklers and the warmth of a good, safe home. He was happy. The boy–his boy–your boy was happy.
Then he called you. He couldn't help it, not anymore.
Sukuna paced around his penthouse, sipping on his spiked coffee and trying to desperately control his…nerves? Alpha instincts? Excitement? Fuck, he didn't know. But he was full of whatever it was, and it drove him nuts.
“Hi!” You answered as you picked up, so full of life as usual. “Been a while. How're you? What's up?”
Sukuna felt so, so old suddenly. Why were you so awake in the morning?
“Think you can spare some of that pep in your step for me?” Sukuna asked. He smiled when he heard you laugh on the other line. “Dunno how the hell you're so awake in the morning.”
“Well, I don't party or work on cars until the crack of dawn,” you purred back, so sweet and teasing. Sukuna almost got hard. Ugh. Ugh. What the fuck was wrong with him?
“Hah? What, you sayin’ I'm irresponsible ‘n make shitty choices, babe?”
“Absolutely.”
“Tch. Omegas.”
You snickered again before cutting to the chase: “So, you're calling about my Touma?”
Sukuna swallowed. “Yeah. Gotta say I'm pretty fucking confused.”
“Yeah, I get it.” He heard you shift in bed, triggering a rumble of grumpy noises from your little one. You hushed him gently and apologized before the small, crackly purring resumed faintly in the background. The thought made Sukuna's heart ache.
“What do you wanna know?”
Sukuna inhaled deeply. “Why'd you keep it?”
“I wanted him,” you said. “Next question.”
“...When did you know?”
“Mmh…I guess about a week or two after we stopped hooking up.”
“And you didn't say shit?”
You went silent for a moment, and Sukuna felt his nerves tingle and prick. He wasn't anxious. He wasn't feeling betrayed. It wasn't any of that. Absolutely not.
“I guess I got cold feet,” you admitted. “I don't--I know how many baby daddy accusations you get, y'know? I didn't want you to think I was just trying to get you to pay me out or something.”
Oh. Okay. That made sense, actually.
Too many omegas and women Sukuna fucked around with pointed the finger at him if they caught some sort of STI or fell pregnant; even if it was months after fucking, Sukuna would be suspected of fathering the pregnancy of a newly-pregnant, ex-partner he hadn't seen in eternities, and the media would run to the ends of the earth with it. He was the infamous bad boy the media circuit loved to prey on. And Sukuna didn't really care for it–not until now. Not until those fucks ruined his opportunity to be a dad.
“Fucking–” Sukuna sighed and put his mug down to rub his face. “Shit. Shit. Fucking media bastards. Fuck.”
“I need to get my car tuned,” you said.
Sukuna deadpanned. “Read the fucking room, babe, we're not–”
“Do you want me to bring Touma?” You finished, undeterred by the alpha's grouchiness. “So you can meet him? I think he'd like that.”
Oh. Oh. Ouch. His heart–was Sukuna about to die? Why'd his chest hurt so much? What the fuck?
Sukuna cleared his throat and ran a hand through his hair. “I–yeah? Yeah. Alright.”
“Okay, cool. When's your next–”
“Tomorrow.” He cleared his throat again and scratched at the back of his neck. “Any time.”
You stifled a laugh poorly. “Don’t be nervous, Sukuna.”
“M'not. Fuck you.”
“I can do tomorrow. Let's saaay…1pm?”
“Yeah, sure. 1pm.”
You rolled up at 12:59pm.
Sukuna had the garage open, everything tidy and ready to go like he actually gave a fuck about tuning your car when his literal fucking son was about to be in his presence. But he was so not nervous. Definitely not fucking nervous. Nope. Nuh-uh. Never.
You stepped out of the car and Sukuna felt his heart jump; you looked the same as you did last time he saw you. You were dressed more casually, though, done up in joggers and runners with a university hoodie to top it all off. Clearly, you didn't care to impress today.
You threw Sukuna an easy smile before pulling open the back door and taking care in plucking your chubby bunny from his car seat. All the while, Sukuna wandered closer and closer, but maintained a respectful distance just in case your momma bear came out to bite. He knew you had an impressive temper when your easy-going self got pushed too far, and he would rather not bring that out right now.
“Pa!” Your son yipped as soon as he got up into your arms. “Puh Pa!”
You melted immediately, punching Sukuna in the gut with your happy scent of maple syrup and cardamom as the little one nuzzled up to you, repeating variants of “pa!” as he rubbed his chubby cheeks and snotty nose against your neck and face to get that perfect scent onto him.
“You're so sweet, bunny,” you cooed and adjusted him in your arms as you met Sukuna the rest of the way. “Hey, hey! So, did you want to meet him first, or–?”
Sukuna didn't know what the fuck to do, honestly.
“I, uh. Car shit first. What needs tuning?” He drawled, watching the pup clinging to you with rapt attention.
Admittedly, Sukuna didn't really pay attention to what you were saying and what you were gesturing to; he was too captivated by the faint wisps of scent he caught from your little one. He smelled of smoke and syrup–a perfect combination of his parents’ scents.
And he just looked so much like the both of you. Touma's skin tone tilted more your direction, but the glowy, bronzey quality that Sukuna brought to the table still shone through in its own weird way. His eyes were almond-shaped like his own, but bore the same, welcoming colour of yours. And, fuck, his hair was just a perfect match to Sukuna's. If the little shit got Maori tattoos too, he'd be a tiny carbon copy.
Damn. Speaking of–would his mom wanna meet the little shit? Her grandson? Would she ever bother leaving Hawaii to–
“You get all that?” You asked.
Sukuna stared at you. “Get what?”
You pursed your lips like you so often did and turned to the big, bad alpha.
“Maybe we should do the meet ‘n greet first, huh?” You swayed a little and kissed Touma awake. “Baby, you wanna meet a friend?”
“Buh!” Touma exclaimed. You gently guided his little face to look at Sukuna, and the boy looked star struck staring up at the absolute unit that was Ryoumen Sukuna.
“Touma, this is Sukuna.” You closed the gap between the two of you a little more, and Sukuna leaned down to look at the little one. His little one.
Sukuna twitched a smile as he looked over the little thing. “You sure this thing’s mine? Looks a little small.”
You laughed. “If you were born as big as you are, I’m so, so sorry for your mother.” You nuzzled Touma’s little cheek and bounced him a little.
“Wuh!” Touma’s little arms flew up towards Sukuna, and the towering man looked a little more than nervous, looking at the tiny pudgy hands like they were deadly weapons.
“Come on, don’t look at him like that.” You took Sukuna’s hand and delivered it to Touma. “He’s curious. He hasn’t met anyone as big and tall as you, y’know?”
Sukuna huffed, but let the little one grab at his fingers and hold his hand. “What, you don’t have another alpha looking after you? Hard to believe that. You're the neediest little bitch I know.”
“Stop. I'm not Yorozu,” you huffed, and Sukuna cringed at the name. “He has alphas around, sure. But not big ones like you–security excluded. It's not like other men want to play nice with another alpha's pup.”
Sukuna caught the hint of a frown on your face, and his hackles started to rise.
“Some dumbfuck giving you grief?” Sukuna asked, voice rolling with thunderous promise. He'd kill whatever moron fucked with you and his pup. You just had to drop the name.
You sighed, light-hearted. “You know what the rich and famous are like--we're the worst.”
Sukuna growled, and Touma mimicked the noise as best as he could with his pathetically teeny tiny crackled voice. Fuckin’ cute as shit.
“Tch. Don't sell yourself short.”
“I'm just trying to say I don't need that around my boy, and I sure as hell don't want it around me, either.” You nodded and stepped closer as Touma reached up for Sukuna again. Apparently just holding his hand wasn't doing it for the boy anymore.
“Good. Don't need those pathetic fucks around the runt–oi, wait, what the fuck're you–”
“Wup, wup!” Your son shrieked as you helped bully Sukuna into holding him.
“He wants uppies.”
“Uppies,” Sukuna balked.
“He wants you to–okay, you're bad at this–don't hold him like that! Here, do it like–” you cut off as you helped Sukuna get a comfortable hold on Touma while the littlest one squirmed and squeaked in delight, trying to climb up onto Sukuna's shoulder but failing miserably.
Sukuna twitched a smile as you sighed, exasperated by the ball of energy trying to scale the mountainous man. But he got a hold of him, tucking his arm under his butt and holding his back to make sure the little shit didn't go plummeting to the floor.
“You give your ma hell, huh? I can get behind that,” Sukuna hummed. His son's little hands papped at his face, grabbing at his nose and jaw–specifically over the dark tattoos streaking along the curves and cut of his features.
And you smiled the entire time. You pursed your lips tightly to hide it, but you did it so poorly. You always did. Maybe it was on purpose.
“So, can I tell you about my car problems now?”
Sukuna held onto his runt while you explained what flaws, either cosmetically or mechanically, were bothering you. It mostly consisted of slight dents from other assholes not knowing how to park, paint scratches, and more of that sort. As a fellow car guy, Sukuna could understand the anguish of having a favourite baby get all dinged up.
“Not hard to fix,” Sukuna decided. He held the hood up with one hand and looked over the motor–everything looked clean and well-maintained. He was almost impressed. “But, well, it'll cost ya. Uraume can send the details.”
You nodded. “Sure, sure, sounds good. I'm never taking this thing on the road again after it's fixed. Too many fucking idiots out there with piss poor driving skills.”
The mechanic smirked. “Ho? So beating up your car is what makes you start cussin’, huh? Noted.” He let the hood fall closed and adjusted his hold on the now-sleeping tot. “Couldn't even get you to do that in bed.”
“Psht, don't say that in front of the baby, Sukuna, jeeze,” you sighed and rubbed your face. “Babies remember more than you'd like to know.”
“Huh. You think he'll remember when he got–”
“No, he won't remember his inception.” You laughed and shook your head, but paused when you saw smears of concealer on your fingers and tutted.
“How long's the car gonna take? Should I get a rental?” You asked before the man could comment.
“Probably, if you want me to detail this thing right,” Sukuna mumbled. He reached out and turned your chin back to him, looking at the spots concealer missing, hinting at dark circles under your eyes.
Your face grew hot, but you nodded and cleared your throat. “Yeah, okay. I'll, uh. I'll call someone to pick us up–”
“I'll take you home.”
You brightened the slightest bit. “Yeah? I–okay.” You pulled his hand from your face and smiled. “I'll grab the car seat.”
Sukuna liked your house. It was a nice mix of traditional and modern with large stretches of woodgrain and bamboo. A neat outdoor garden and pond decorated the front, but a bigger, more lush collection of tropical plants greeted guests. It was beautiful, if one was desperate to be in nature.
“I'm just gonna get him to bed, be one second.”
Sukuna nodded and pocketed his hands as he pretended to not watch you trot upstairs with the sleepy cub melting in your arms. You still had a nice ass even after popping that little melon out. Huh.
He looked around your space more, wandering with slow, lumbering steps. The house wasn't huge by any means, but it was cozy and warm, quiet and hidden away from the city's gaze. That was probably why you chose it–here, you could be honest with yourself. You could shield your babe from the brutality of your career and keep him safe from leering eyes. Honestly, one of the leaves on your giant monstera could hide him from the whole universe.
Guy's too obsessed with growing shit. It ticked him off, but he didn't know why.
Maybe it was all the photos of you and Touma. Maybe it was because he wasn't in them and too many other men were in his place, lining your walls in the protection of cheap IKEA frames–but Sukuna didn't want you. No, no, Ryoumen Sukuna did not want anyone. He didn't want you. He didn't need to settle down and–
“You want a glass of wine?” You asked when you came back down the stairs. “It's plum wine. Don't really have any scotch or anything, but I–”
Sukuna scoffed before a mocking laugh slipped out of him. You paused, looking at him with bleak attention as he shook his head and pocketed his hands. Your request for him to stay pissed him off; clearly, you expected something more from him.
“Whaddaya think is gonna happen here, huh? You think we're gonna fall in love, pick up where we left off, have a happy little fuckin’ family to tell the tabloids about?”
“What?” You asked. “I never–”
“Didn't have to. Gotta admit, you did a better job than the rest of the whores that tried wrangling me in to–”
“All I asked,” you cut him off, voice quiet but firm, “Is if you wanted wine. I’m not proposing, Sukuna.”
Sukuna didn’t like that. The whole…not-being-into-him and not wanting him to stick around after he just shut you down. He sucked his teeth and took a breath, about to say something, but you spoke first.
“I know this is a PR thing. I know how the whole media circus works–you want your ex to stop bothering you, and I want people to stop asking questions about who the fucking father of my son is.” You paused, staring Sukuna dead in his eyes, a quiet, simmering rage boiling just beneath the surface of placid control.
“Call my manager when the car’s done,” you decided, sounding beaten down and exhausted. “I’ll send someone for it. Thanks for the ride home.”
Next thing the man knew, he was ushered toward the door and stood in the doorway, stuck on the idea of being kicked out of his omega’s–no, no, out of an omega’s house like he was trash.
“Fucking–wait, just–”
“What?” You snapped.
“I could–glass of wine doesn’t sound too bad–”
You shoved the bottle into his hands and slammed the door.
Sukuna tried to sleep it off–as in, he slept around to forget about the crushing weight of rejection collapsing down on him, shattering his chest, spearing his heart with shattered bone.
You still kept being so fucking nice to him, too. You never slandered him, never spoke ill whenever he was asked about in interviews–you spared his reputation with a kind smile every time you had to talk about him or to him.
And he was grateful for it, even if he didn't return the favor. It's not like he was on a smear campaign, no, but anytime a hook up would ask about you, he wouldn't give a glowing review, per se. But it wouldn't be scalding either. Just sheer indifference tainted with drops of bitterness stemming from unripe guilt.
It went on like that for months–until you did your parental duties, and set aside your feelings about Sukuna for the sake of your son.
“Uraume, get that,” Sukuna called as his phone rang. He was too busy fucking around under the hood of his latest project to wipe his hands free of grease and pick up himself, obviously.
But Uraume was there for a reason. They picked up the phone with a polite hello before their sharp frigidity melted into rounded edges.
“(Name)-san,” they hummed. “It's good to hear from you. Do you need to talk to Sukuna-san?”
Sukuna started wiping his hands off so unbelievably fast.
“He's working on a car right now. You know how he can be when he's focused.”
“Fucking–piece of shit–what the fuck–” somehow, he got even more grease and oil on his hands thanks to that stupid fucking rag. God, what a nightmare.
“Sure, I can take a message.”
“Fuckin’ shit fuck, fuck.” He wiped his hands on his designer jeans before running to Uraume and gesturing for the phone.
Uraume's brows raised, and they actually smiled.
“Ah, hold on, Sukuna-san's here.”
Sukuna snatched up the phone, ignoring the knowing look glimmering in Uraume’s eyes. Ugh. Ugh. Betas.
“Hey,” Sukuna said after clearing his throat.
“Hey! Ume said you were working on a car? You didn't have to stop to talk.”
“Yeah, well.” Sukuna shrugged to himself and kicked a scrapped car part, sending it skittering across the ground and clanking into other parts. Jesus, when did his shop get so messy? “Needed a break anyway.”
“Ah. You work too hard, you need to take breaks more often,” you laughed sweetly. “So, listen, Touma's birthday's coming up–”
“Shit, seriously?” Sukuna grinned and kicked another chopped part. “Fuck. How old's the little shit turning?”
“Two! He's growing up so fast, I wish I could slow down time and–” you paused and laughed, suddenly sounding unsure and a bit nervous. “Sorry, sorry, was about to go on a tangent. Anyway, there is a little get-together, but you don't have to come. Satoru and Toji'll be there. But your brother and his son'll be there, too, so it won't suck completely.
“Otherwise, if you want to come see him earlier or something, that's fine, and–and you're not cutting me off and I didn't think I'd get this far so I'm losing the plot.”
Sukuna huffed. “What, you don't want me to fuckin’ listen, huh?”
“I know you will since I have such a pretty voice, but I'm surprised you're being a good boy for once.”
The mechanic rolled his eyes and rubbed his face. Who knows if it was to wipe away embarrassment or fatigue.
“You’re exhausting.”
“And you’re a dick.” There was a special brand of teasing bitterness behind those words, but the vibes were balanced perfectly; seemed you were still cranky about what he said, but you were willing to let it slide.
Sukuna chuckled, relaxing the slightest bit. “Alright. I don't know what the fuck kids like at that age, but I'll figure somethin’ out. I can at least show up Jin.”
“Wow.”
“Text me time and place. I'll be there.” After a moment, he added, “I’ll bring some plum wine. Fancy shit.”
The hidden rumble of a purr snuck its way out from your side, and Sukuna did everything he could to suppress his alpha's reciprocation.
“Sounds good. See you then, Sukuna.”
Toji answered the door.
“Hah. Why the hell are you here?” The fuckhead ex-Zenin asked with a stupid, shitty smirk on his dumbass face.
Sukuna strained not to throw the first punch. He really shouldn't murder someone at his--your son's birthday party. Murder is bad. Murder is bad.
“Fuck you.” Hey, at least it wasn't murder. “‘M here for my fucking kid.”
Toji crossed his arms and suddenly looked beyond bored as he leaned against the doorframe.
“Your kid? You mean (Name)’s kid?” He wondered, putting on a show of thinking. “Weird.”
“You're one to talk. You forgetting what you did to your own brat? You fuckin’--”
“Sukuna!” Your sweet voice called, instantly changing the atmosphere. “Glad you came. Do you–oi, Toji, move, stop bodyguarding. You're not a bouncer.”
“Eh?” Toji stayed in his spot as you smacked at his arm and tried to push him away. “I'm just standing here. Not bodyguarding. Minding my business.”
“You’re so full of shit.” You wheezed and squeaked as the man suddenly gave way, nearly making you crash into him and plummet to the floor. But you caught yourself and hissed at the dark-haired menace until he whistled innocently and waltzed away.
“Fucking--why’s he here again?” Sukuna grumbled as you let him in. He leaned down to nose at your cheek with a grumpy, quiet grunt--typical greeting procedures for an interested individual or bonded pair. But the way you choked on whatever you were about to say meant he must've caught you off guard.
“He's uh–we work together. We've worked together? He was the stunt coordinator for some movies I've been in.” You cleared your throat and took the present bag from Sukuna to place with the others. “And I babysit Gumi sometimes.”
“Gumi? What the fuck is a Gumi?”
“Megumi? His son?” Oh. Oh. “I babysit Yuuji too, so. Thick as thieves, y'know?”
Sukuna nodded a little, thinking hard on the lore. He liked that Yuuji was taken care of by you, but surely that wretched Gumi could go somewhere else. Toji was probably just leeching off of you.
“Oi, Momma, get in here,” Toji crowed from wherever all the baby giggles and excitement bubbled from in the house. “Your boys need some maternal guidance–”
“Toji, don't make it weird!” Jin whisper-yelled before going on a long-winded rant about this and that, about proper behaviour and attitudes in front of children (not that the kids were paying attention to anything Toji did).
You gave Sukuna a tired smile. “Come on. It won’t be that bad, I promise.”
Sukuna sighed, but let you drag him to his demise, bottle of wine in-hand.
But it wasn’t that bad. Not really.
Your other boys, Gojo Satoru and Getou Suguru, showed up and showered tiny Touma with way too much praise and far too many gifts, but the little shit looked so pleased that Sukuna couldn’t get too annoyed. Shoko and Uraume came by, too, much to Sukuna’s surprise. Uraume brought with them a whole fucking confectionary cake they’d crafted themselves at home. Gojo obsessed over it and Getou tried to reign him in to no avail.
And the night went on. No one talked shit, not unless it was in good fun, no one got fucking hammered, no one talked about work–it was all about the kids. Nothing else. No one else.
Sukuna could never guess just how far that truth went.
When everyone left for the night, the alpha could start to see the edges of your smile fraying. But you held on, thanking everyone for the gifts and for showing up for Touma, and especially thanking Jin for offering to let all the little ones spend the night at his place (you and Toji would forever be in his debt).
Then, when the door closed and all fell silent, he heard you cry.
Sukuna didn't know what to do about people crying. He never had. Even when he was a kid, he had a hard time trying to comfort people with hugs and words of reassurance–he just couldn't do it.
“It's okay,” he heard you whisper. “It's okay. It's okay. You're okay. It's okay. I'm okay.”
Sukuna got up and leaned against the doorway to the kitchen. “Sure about that?”
You jumped and clasped a hand over your mouth to stifle your scream. Sukuna barked out an ugly, reedy laugh while he defended himself from your petty smacks and pinches.
“You scared the fuck out of me–why're you still even here? Go home! Shoo!” You wiped your eyes once you were done harassing him and turned away, busying yourself with cleaning up dishes and wrapping paper left in the aftermath.
Sukuna followed you idly, a shit-eating grin still plastered on his face. What could he say? He loved seeing you get all petty and riled up. But he didn't love seeing you cry. He didn't love seeing you try to stealthily wipe tears away, to try and steady your shaky breathing.
“What’s going on with you, babe?” Sukuna asked as he settled beside you at the sink.
“It's nothing,” you said with a snuffle. “It's seriously nothing. Sorry, I--you don't need to stay. Or anything.” You sighed and rubbed at your eyes with your sleeve. “You've done your fatherly duties. You're free to leave.”
“Yeah? ‘N what about my baby daddy duties?” He wondered, voice so horribly low and comforting, like the buzzing crackle of a campfire.
You laughed, watery and shaky. “You already did everything you needed to, Sukuna.”
“Come on, don't cockblock me like that.” He gently tilted your Chin his way to catch your eyes just like he had back at the shop all those months ago. “Look at me.”
You did. Your eyes were red and irritated, whatever pretty boy make up you wore was wiped off and smudged, and those heavy, dark bags met the light in front of someone else for the first time in a long time.
You still had the gall to laugh it off and pull Sukuna's hand from your face with a small, “I'm fine,” though.
“Then why the hell are you crying?” He asked.
You squeezed his hand with both of yours. “Things are just…hard. Overwhelming.”
Sukuna nodded a bit. “That why Jin took the runts tonight?”
“Yeah. Needed some time, I guess.” You snuffled and wiped your face with both hands before finishing up with cleaning. “Makes me sound like a shit parent, I know.”
Sukuna couldn’t disagree more. “Least you're not flipping out on the kid. That'd be way shittier, yeah?”
“I don't know. I guess, but–yeah. I don't know.”
Sukuna sighed and scooped you up like a new bride. “You're driving me fucking mental.”
“Sukuna–!”
“Quiet.” Your omega indeed piped down at the grouchy command, and you shyly let the man carry you up the steps to find your bedroom. “You're getting some damn rest. You look like shit.”
You grumbled something Sukuna elected to ignore in favour of tossing you onto a bed the way one might lob a stone into a pond. You landed with a warbled squawk and looked at Sukuna with horribly accusatory, baffled eyes.
Sukuna quirked a brow as he looked down on you, gladly using his broad build and tall stature to secure your submission. And it worked; the aggravated spark in your eyes curled up and fell silent after a few long seconds. Your head lowered just the slightest bit, too, but your passive gaze remained stuck on him, waiting for his next move.
“Fine,” you grumbled.
Sukuna raised his brows and eased onto the bed, caging you underneath him with his solid frame. Your scent flickered with shy playfulness, and Sukuna relished in it.
“How do I know you're gonna obey, omega?”
“I guess you don't. Not for certain,” you admitted begrudgingly.
“Tch. Someone's gotta keep you accountable then, huh?” He nosed at your neck, nearly letting his lips touch your neck but refusing to do so in the same instance. “Make sure you're doing the right thing, make sure you're behaving.”
One of his hands squeezed at your soft thigh before inching up little by little. Your hands found themselves in his hair as he teased at your joggers’ waistband, pulling the elastic taut before letting it go.
“Sukuna,” you laughed, sounding a little breathless. “I, uh–I thought you said–”
“Changed my mind.”
“But–”
“Forget what I said and let me make you cum on my fingers, brat.”
Oh. Well, hard to argue against that.
You swallowed but gave a meek nod. He ripped your bottoms off and felt up your blazing skin with rough, calloused hands, groping and grabbing in the same spots he liked back when you were hooking up: your thighs, your hip bones, the squish of your stomach. As much as the man harped on about not wanting “damaged goods,” he sure worshiped your body like it was brand new, untouched.
Sukuna brought his fingers to your mouth, and you took them with utmost compliance. Your tongue worked against his digits thoughtfully and thoroughly for your own sake–a lack of starter lube wouldn't end well, after all. And Sukuna was not the most patient man in the sack.
“See?” Sukuna crowed into your ear as his hand traveled south and a finger sunk into you. “It's not so bad to just behave, now is it?”
You already felt like you were about to explode, and Sukuna savoured It. He liked being the one to do this to you–the only one for a while, considering how tight and sensitive you were. Any little push or prod inside you brought sweet sighs and soft moans to the surface–and a second and third finger had your hips bucking and your nails digging into his shoulder and back as he finger-fucked you to oblivion while still caging you in.
“Good omega,” he cooed. “Gonna cum already, huh? Tch, you shoulda said no one’s been taking care of you; I would’ve taken my parental responsibilities more seriously.” His lips and teeth landed on your neck, as you curled up into him, body tensing, heels digging into the mattress, panting and gasping getting louder and faster. The sound made his pants strain even more.
“Fuck, you smell fucking good. Better than when I fucked you the first time.”
“I-I forgot you talked so much in bed,” you managed out. “Could you just–shut up?”
Sukuna growled, and you whined. “You want me to shut up, huh? You wanna listen to your slick fucking hole getting spread open, plowed into? You miss me that much, omega?”
“No.” You hissed and clung to his upper arm as he somehow managed to take it up a notch, slipping his fourth finger in and spreading you obscenely wide.
“I think you did. Think you were hopin’ I’d come around, plow you into the bed again, stuff you full like no one else can.”
“Sukuna–”
“I’ll fill this hole up all you want, baby–I’ll even stuff another pup in you. Twins. You want that, huh? You gonna be my omega from now on? Creaming on my cock ‘n fingers the way you shoulda been the day you walked your perfect, little ass into my life?”
“Shut up, shut up, shut up–” you choked on a gasp and bit into his shoulder, soaking his shirt with drool and shuddered mewls while your body tightened and ecstasy hit like the weight of Sukuna’s words–brutal, fast, honest.
Sukuna moaned in sympathy, ignoring the way his hand and arm cramped and ached to keep pistoning into you and draw out your high. He couldn't help it–something about you drove him mad in that moment. It could have been how you made his ego swell, it might've been the way his greed needed your slick staining his and only his skin, perhaps it could have been a quiet yearning coming from his lonely, hollow alpha. He didn't know. But he didn't question it.
Your body started to relax with the death grip you had on his shoulder as you came down from the sudden, electric high. Your hips still jolted with every slow, lazy push into your soft hole, though a haze of purring and cooing filled the spot where gasps and moans once did. Eventually, you melted off of him and collapsed onto your back, looking as content as a cat lounging in the sun.
“Oi, oi, you're not done yet, sweetheart.” But if you said you were done, he might've listened. Just that once.
You hummed something as you looked up at him, eyes doey and so egregiously lovey-dovey.
“That's a nice face. Make sure you save it just for me,” Sukuna gently commanded, and you laughed.
“Demanding. I thought you didn't like used goods.”
Sukuna scowled. “Shut up.” His free hand traced the stripes of stretched skin left in the wake of bearing his baby boy. “I like ‘em when they're used by me.”
“Does that really make them ‘used goods,’ then?” You murmured as if speaking logic too loud would break Sukuna's entranced obsession of you.
But maybe, maybe, you had a point.
“Guess I'll have to think on that.” His fingers slipped out of you and he gave you a wet slap on the ass to wake you up. Your subsequent squeak sure as hell woke Sukuna up.
“Ow. Gross.”
“I'm not finished with you, brat. Don't get too fuckin’ content, yeah?” He smirked when you glanced at his crotch expectantly. “You want me to fuck you?”
“Please.”
Sukuna sighed and settled between your legs as he futzed with his belt and button. “Could put up a bit of a fight.”
“Too tired.” You yawned and stretched with a pleased sigh. “No will to argue.”
The alpha leaned down to bite at your knee, and you pulled your legs together to avoid his chunky, rude fangs. You knew he'd delight in making you bleed or leaving dark bruises. He was the worst.
“Still got a little fight left in ya,” Sukuna said with a grin. “Let's see how much more we can find, hm?”
#male reader insert#sukuna x you#sukuna x m!reader#jjk#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#reader insert#ryoumen sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna x reader#jjk smut#jjk x male reader#jjk x y/n#sukuna x y/n#sukuna x reader#sukuna ryoumen x reader#itadori sukuna x reader
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SSR Fellow Honest - Playful Dress Voice Lines
When Summoned: As long as you have Fellow Honest-sama by your side, there is nothing for you to fear.
Summon Line: In my good hands, you'll have all the applause and fame you could ever dream of! Now then, is the next stage over this way?
Groooovy!!: Let's go, Gidel! Life is all about being free and having fun!
Home: Go! Showtime!
Home Idle 1: So, it's written here in this textbook... Mhmm. Uh-huh. I seeeee! ...I ain't got a clue what it's tryin' to say.
Home Idle 2: That little brat! ...Ahem. Have you seen Ace-kun anywhere? I thought I'd pay him back for a prank he just pulled a bit ago.
Home Idle 3: Hey, Gidel, didja see how grand the cafeteria is here...? Better eat up as much as we can while we're here!
Home Idle - Login: Well, ain't this a fine, scholarly establishment. I can feel my knees knockin' together just from stepping foot on campus. Don'tcha agree, Gidel?
Home Idle - Groovy: Fwahaha! Ramshackle's a real odd name for a dorm. You got a pretty sweet pad, you better take care of it.
Home Tap 1: I seriously don't know what to make of Kalim-kun's happy-go-lucky nature. Even if I hadn't been the one to trap him, he definitely would've ended up in some kind of pinch some day, you know that, right?
Home Tap 2: I'll admit it now, but I was definitely shocked when I first laid eyes on Ortho-kun. I guess there really are a ton of curious things at a school.
Home Tap 3: You want to know how I wormed my way onto this campus? Maybe you really shouldn't underestimate Fellow Honest-sama's gilded silver tongue.
Home Tap 4: It seems you young scholars have no appreciation for being able to learn in a school like you do. If you're gonna skive off anyway, just drop out already.
Home Tap 5: What, you want to hear about all the different kinds of shows I've done? Fwahaha! I dunno, maaaybe it'll be a little too exciting for you to handle, hm?
Home Tap - Groovy: Oh, boy. I definitely know I want the school that I put together to be a waaay more peaceful and refined place than Night Raven College.
Duo: [FELLOW]: Now, it's time for the show, Grim-kun. [GRIM]: Fellow! I'll show you what a real star can do!
Requested by @sakurakudo.
#twisted wonderland#twst#fellow honest#gidel#twst fellow#twst gidel#twst translation#twst playful land#mention: ace#mention: kalim#mention: ortho
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Pick me girls and OM! Brothers - Part 2
Characters: Satan, Asmo, Beel and Belphie (x reader, separately)
Part 1 - Lucifer, Mammon and Levi (x reader, separately)
Part 3 - Diavolo, Barbatos, Solomon and Simeon (x reader, separately)
Masterlist
CW: pick me girl behavior, one of these girls is actually really stupid, suggestive, mentions of sex between the brothers and mc, mentions of violence, a bit of magic, mentions of cheating (not actual cheating), nightmares, implied death, jealous mc, some fluff, some hurt, some comfort, still ooc but i had even more fun
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Satan
Your boyfriend looked more offended than you ever had the chance to feel.
The cashier at the bookstore barely had the time to say anything about her supposed romance with the demon before he appeared in his signature pose: a hand in his hip and the other one over his chest.
He had been a regular for years and you didn't know if the girl had been delusional enough to believe she had something with him or if she was just jealous and wanted to make you feel bad.
You weren't sure which one was sadder.
"Am I hearing this correctly?" he said with spite, distracting you from your own thoughts "Are you so daft you were considering me reciprocating your feelings?"
The girl lowered her gaze, clearly embarrassed, and for a moment you felt guilty. Maybe she really thought she had something mutual going on with Satan; a crush that went too far in her own imagination.
She proved you wrong, however, when not only did she give you a side eye, but also said the most stupidest thing one could ever muster.
"Well, obviously you are so daft you chose them over me"
You couldn't waste time on feeling hurt; not when Satan was showing his fangs, letting his tail scratch the floor as it lashed behind him. As hot as he looked like this, it was not the moment nor the place to show his demon form in a fit of rage.
The stupid cashier seemed proud of getting a reaction out of him, finally catching his attention. Maybe she was a demon of wrath too? Maybe that's how she flirted with other demons?
The poor thing would be lucky if she ever lived to see another day.
Let her discover that fact on her own.
"She's not worth it, Satan" you urged, pushing him to the door "Let's go to that cat cafe you mentioned earlier. You said they had new kittens, right?"
That seemed to do the trick.
He looked at you with love, still mixed with anger and bewilderment, but not enough for you not to hold his hand and lean against him.
"I'm sorry, my dear" he murmured, then he spoke louder "Do not believe a word she said"
"I would never"
"Good"
He nodded to himself, like the idea of you believing the cashier was too stupid to even consider it, but neither of you could ignore how his hand stiffened in yours for a second.
"Let's go see some kittens" you said in a singing voice, leading him in the street towards your destination.
You failed to see the adoration in his eyes.
Asmo
This succubus dated Asmo long before you were even an idea in your parents' minds and she wanted you to keep that in mind.
She wanted you to know that everything you knew, she knew better (a blatant lie) and that Asmo preferred experience over novelty (ew).
"I remember the times we went to the sauna and... Oh, sorry, does he take you to the sauna?"
"He invited me a couple of times, yes" but I had to say no or else I would've boiled alive.
"And does he...?"
Does he. Does he. Does he.
He does. HE DOES. HE DEFINITELY DOES.
In which moment did you think going to The Fall was a better plan than doing each other's skincare routine while making fun of 50 shades of Grey?
The both of you could be criticizing that poor excuse of BDSM right now (before recreating the correct version), but, instead, Asmo was ordering the girliest cocktail ever made while this Camila Cabello wannabe harassed you.
"...that was a little joke between us"
Lord Diavolo she just kept going.
"I'm so happy you remember so well your past relationship with him" you intervened with a strain in your voice, "but maybe it's time for you to stop and leave"
The succubus smirked with a smugness that made your innards burn from the inside out.
"Don't get jealous! I'm sure he loves you too"
Oh my Lord.
The lion, the witch and the audacity of this bitch.
"Hon', look at this!"
There he came, your savior, dressed in a skimpy dress with hands full of shimmery drinks and a glint in his very beautiful loving eyes.
"They didn't have human beverages, but I swear the taste is impeccable, you'll love it! Just let me take a picture for Devilgram first"
Camila Cabello, as you had finally decided to call her, cleared her throat in search of the demon's attention. Asmodeus looked in her direction, obviously trying to remember who she was.
"Asmo, baby!" she was nothing but a smile full teeth and a mission. Her gaze a little desperate "Remember me?"
Her determination died, however, when Asmo's expression turned shocked after studying her. He grasped his chest in sorrow as he asked the funniest question you could hear at the moment.
"What are you wearing?"
Camila Cabello was finally at a loss of words and you briefly wondered if this had ever happened to her.
"If you're gonna meddle in my relationship with MC at least take effort in looking decent"
His expression was sweet, saccharine, but there was an underlying seriousness in his voice.
He was so beautiful. And he was all yours.
Beel
She was one of the boys, apparently. Beel had definitely never mentioned her, but the girl only laughed when you told her that.
"Wow, controlling much? Does he have to tell you about every friend?"
Well, no, Beel didn't have to inform you about everyone he's ever met, but your boyfriend was sweet enough to want you in every aspect of his life, thus introducing you to his friends, his teammates and even his gym bros.
Definitely not to this girl.
You looked at her in disbelief, licking your teeth with a calculating glance. How much would Beel care if you hit this airhead with a dumbbell?
"We hang out together almost every day" she boasted, twisting a strand of her hair around her finger "It's not even weird for me to be in the boys locker room"
Were you strong enough to throw a dumbbell?
Surely she'd rather be with them instead of you if she was 'one of the boys', no? Why would she be in the bleachers with you, waiting for the team to finish their training, when she could be in any other part of the field doing exercise or playing for another sport?
"I'm not making you insecure, am I?" asked the girl in poorly faked innocence "If he loves you so much you should have nothing to worry about"
"Oh, I trust him" you assured her, but you didn't sound as confident as you wanted to. Although Beel never gave you any reasons to doubt him, it was difficult to defend your relationship when this girl was so convinced everyone was in love with her.
"That's so cool"
You decided to ignore her and her mocking tone, hoping to end the conversation right there, but she just kept talking. It was obvious she wanted to get under your skin.
For what? you wondered. Did she expect Beel to leave you if she batted her lashes fast enough? Did she know Beel at all??
"Oh, Beely!"
You cringed with a scowl visible to everyone around you. Some of Beel's teammates laughed at your missfortune, while the others, the ones you liked best, turned around in horror and left without a second glance.
Wether he was oblivious or just didn't care, Beel wasted no time in running towards you with a smile on his face.
"Did you see me?" he asked, looking up to you with a boyish grin and brightened eyes.
"I'm always looking at you"
Beel blushed, his smile still obvious in his face, but he couldn't get another word in before the girl talked again.
"I was looking at you too"
You rolled your eyes and Beel immediately stared at you with a curious glance. He hummed in response, ignoring her once again as he reached out for your hand to caress your knuckles.
"There's a new limited edition menu in a restaurant near RAD"
No questions added nor needed. You smiled at him and nodded, bringing his hand to your lips to kiss it. A promise for later.
"Noo, we used to go there so much..."
"Can you stop?" Beel interrupted her with a deadpan expression "You're making MC uncomfortable"
The girl looked at him in surprise, mouth wide open, clearly not expecting to be snapped at.
She didn't dare to look at you after that.
Belphie
It wasn't the first time you dreamt about this girl and it wasn't the first time you dreamt about her stealing your sloth of a boyfriend.
She wasn't some mystery girl, but rather Belphie's old seatmate, the one he had before you were kidnapped admitted in RAD. A quiet doe-eyed succubus that looked at him like he was the best thing that ever happened to both human and demon mankind.
She'd tried to sit next to him a couple of times with no avail, always getting rejected in your favor. Then, Belphie and you started dating and she stopped trying. You'd innocently thought she'd surrendered.
But not only did she search for him the very few times you guys weren't next to each other, she also ignored you completely when you were there.
Ignoring her back was easier said than done.
And this time, the oniric version of her wasn't just stealing your boyfriend. This time, he was willingly going to her, making your heart hurt so much it made you wake up with what felt like broken ribs.
It took you a couple of minutes to pull yourself together and not push Belphie away when he brought you back to his chest. The image of him kissing her while looking at you was engraved in your mind.
So, although sweating and hurting both from your heart and your confidence, you forced yourself to sleep.
You didn't notice just how awake Belphie was.
Back when you were still friends, you had allowed him to introduce himself into your slumber each time you had a nightmare. Images of you dying under the jaws and claws of faceless demons disappeared faster when the real Belphie was there. Ironic, isn't it?
He tried to stop every single one of them, but sometimes he was so deep in his own dreams it was proved to be impossible.
You thought this was one of those occasions, but, alas, you were wrong.
Days passed without any new event and Belphie mentioned nothing about your initial irrational coldness towards him, which made you feel a tiny bit better. Eventually you'd get so embarrassed about the situation that you had no other option but to dote on him like the brat he was, leading to a whole weekend sprawled over his bed in the attic.
The girl was still there, although not as persistent with Belphie, and she avoided you like the plague, with fright in her eyes.
So he did something about her, didn't he? But how did he know? And what did he do? You wanted to ask, curious as ever, but as time went by and the eyebags under her eyes started to occupy her entire face, you decided against it.
Barely a month later she disappeared without leaving trace. And since Belphie didn't even acknowledge her at all, why would you?
Tagging a little more: @hello-gloomy @the-sassiest-toaster @hero-nii-blog @yourlocalyin @elaemae
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