#without even getting into my famous hatred of her father

[hermemescabin]

I know in my heart that as of chalice of the gods, Sally Jackson is Annabeths emergency contact

[lazyofficer]

HERE IS WHY SHIRLULU IS LEGITIMATE SHIP -PART 5

Warning: I'm not a writer and English is not my native language. So kindly bare it or DM me about it. Criticism is welcomed not hate.

Continuation

LELOUCH BEING BOYFRIEND CODED -

4. Lelouch's fear of losing Shirley -

Lelouch, as a child, was abandoned by his homeland and family after a traumatic event (mom's death), leaving him to take care of himself and his disabled sister.

This is why his fear of losing people or getting abandoned is greater and is one of the reasons why he always on guard and is detached.

He never revealed anything to Shirley , Fearing she might hate him and change her behavior.

Instances

R1 Stage 03

Lelouch doesn't want his friends to know about him being the prince of England because he fears that they might abandon him and would distance themselves from him because he belongs to the royal family, and they might also hate him for keeping it a secret all these years

R1 Stage 12

Lelouch's famous bathroom angst

This guy killed his half brother (Clovis) without battling an eyelid, but got very disturbed knowing he was the reason for her father's death.

The reason behind his angst; if she came to know the truth, she would hate him, and if he hid it, he would have to live with burden, and their relationship wouldn't be the same anymore.

PS - In epi 13 outro - he was so disturbed that he considered leaving the stage (as zero) and return to his normal student life.

R1 stage 15

Lelouch's realization of his feelings for Shirley came after erasing her memory. The sense of loss turned into frustration, and he lashed out at CC.

P.S - In the series, Lelouch has lost his cool and lashed out only when it comes to Shirley or Nunnally. Frankly, when I watched CG for the first time, I didn't expect him to lash out, especially at CC (I thought he would be sad for a while and move on).

R2 stage 13

Another trauma for Lelouch, even after being so protective of her, he lost her at the end , in a unexpected and tragic way.

Lelouch used his geass over and over in hope and desperation. A lot of his human side is shown when it comes to Shirley. 

He couldn't utter a word, let alone his feelings, because he was struggling to come to terms with Shirley dying. He was shocked when she closes her eyes and even shakes her desperately, hoping for signs of life in her. Reality of death sinks into his mind making him scream in agony.

R2 Stage 15

Lelouch had gone rogue after her death. It's like a dam broke, and there is nothing holding back Lelouch.

He originally planned to use the Geass order, but because of Shirley's death, they had to face the brunt of his emotions (sadness and hatred).

 He destroyed a phenomenon called Geass because it was reason for Shirley's death and that was the "least" he could do for her.

He wanted to destroy Britannia for his mother's murder and Nunnally's condition, and he destroyed Geass order for Shirley.

He did not destory the Geass order because he felt "grateful" for Shirley's friendship, nor his "guilt" about her death. He destroyed it because he is someone who takes revenge for his loved ones. 

I have seen him laugh like a maniac, but this sinister look from Lelouch is rare.

Imo Lelouch is grateful to Rolo for sacrificing himsel to save his life. (despite knowing he hated him), but he never forgave Rolo for killing Shirley; that's why he never mourned over him like he did with other characters.

Clovis and Rolo death had the least impact on him.

R2 stage 15

He stopped going to Ashford after Shirley's death and became full-time Zero. He doesn't care about his identity being exposed.

It seems like Ashford without Shirley is meaningless to him, and he also didn't want his other friends to die a tragic death (Rolo's psychotic jealousy).

R2 Stage 03

This reckless move on destroying Geass order and revealing himself as Zero made the emperor use Nunnally, as Trump card, and the Black Knights started doubting him after the massacre. All events led to Zero Requiem.

Shirley's death initiated the path of Zero requiem.

Lelouch's original plan was to quietly defeat Britannia and bring peace to the world (without revealing his identity). He wanted to live in a peaceful world with Shirley. (There is a short story about Lelouch's ideal world that he dreamed of).

P.S - This is such a classic one used by a male anime protagonist for his girl ( for ignoring them due to important stuff).

In  Code Geass series, both Lelouch and Shirley are dead, and I hope they are reborn again and live in the peaceful world that Lelouch created.

Honestly, I haven't watched the movies, and I don't feel like watching (the clips didn't help), and I really don't understand why they kept Shirley alive (shove her in the corner) and why did  they make Shirlulu date if Cclulu was the end game.

[diviniussfr]

After all, did Kaiser's mother love Kaiser's father or not? I've analyzed and reread and reread Michael's past over and over again and I've always asked myself this question ("Did Kaiser's mother really love Kaiser's father?") and now I've found the "answer" to that question.

Kaiser's mother was the main actress of a small theater where Kaiser's father was the director, as I said, a small theater, in other words, she was not yet recognized and because she was an actress at the theater where Kaiser's father was the director, they met from then on and ended up having a relationship that was described as a "mistake of passion" rather than "love"... but we'll get into that later.

Apparently in the future, Kaiser's mother ended up gaining fame and attention (probably because she was the main actress of the small theater that ended up gaining fame) and truly became a "famous" actress and from what I understand this happens before Kaiser was born.

After Kaiser was born she abandoned him with her father and left to pursue her acting career in an ambitious/greedy way without even thinking twice and the consequences of this made Kaiser's father heartbroken (he really loved her :< ) ending his talent and wealth and he sank into cachaça as a form of comfort... and even became a violent man, that is, before he was a normal man, but due to abandonment, cachaça and gambling he became violent.

but...

Here we go back to the past again because I realized that Kaiser's mother didn't just abandon him; before she named him “Michael Kaiser” and left only the famous blue rose that we know as Kaiser's main brand. Kaiser's father held so much resentment towards Kaiser's mother that it turned into hatred which caused Kaiser's father to not call his son by the name his mother gave him. He took out all the hatred he felt for his “wife” on his son.

In these two panels we finally found the answer to the main question.

Kaiser's father insults himself, saying that he is "useless with no talent" and then says that he was abandoned by the woman he loved, making it clear that he really loved Kaiser's mother, but it seems that she did not feel the same way. She is described as someone greedy who probably only used Kaiser's father to get what he wanted, which in this case is fame and attention.

Their relationship was described as a "mistake of passion" and Michael was that mistake, always making it clear that Michael was never planned by either his mother or his father and when Michael was born his mother just named him and left to continue her life without nor give any more news and soon marrying another man.

And Kaiser's father, having been abandoned and becoming an alcoholic, became quite violent and held a grudge against Kaiser's mother and took out all this grudge on Michael himself, which was the result of this "error of passion". As if it were Michael's fault; From my point of view, Kaiser's father must have thought "If this boy had never been born, she wouldn't have abandoned me".

.

.

.

.

Кайзер, я ненавижу твою мать:<

[aita-blorbos]

AITA for starting a war, trying to conquer an entire continent and dismantle the Church to ensure a new dawn for my people?

Before you make any decisions, here's a little background. Please hear me out here.

I (18F) live in a continent divided into three territories, plus a central Church. Up until very recently, I was the crown princess of one of them. In all three of these territories, noble families make all of the major decisions. This is because the nobles are believed to have a divine right, due to special marks that (almost) only nobles have, which grant some of them powers from birth. Within noble families, these marks are prioritized, and even noble children born without them will often be cast off to the side. It's a deeply unfair system that values people and gives them power using a completely random genetic factor over the person's merit. The Church, which is very powerful here, reinforces this system, as these powers were passed down from ten famous heroes who worked alongside the Church's patron saint a long time ago, and thus those with these marks are considered closer to our Goddess.

As a child, my siblings and I were experimented on by an underground group of people who have the goal of wiping out the people of the surface world. These experiments were with the goal of giving me a second one of these marks. These experiments were torturous and drove all of my siblings insane, if they didn't outright kill them. In the end, I was the only one who survived and retained my sanity. Ever since this, I've had a deep hatred for the system perpetuated by the Church that places so much value on these marks.

When I was 17, I enrolled in an Academy where many nobles, as well as people wanting to be knights, are trained. However, I had a goal in all of this. You see, the Academy is located in the same place as the Church's headquarters. During this time, I entered into an uneasy alliance with the underground group who conducted the experiments on me as a child.

During this time, in secret, I convince my father to hand me control of my nation. I bring my soldiers to the Academy with me to spring an attack. Things came to a head when the Church's leader tried to do something strange in this big tomb place, I imagine trying to use my teacher to further her quest for power and absolute control. I order my soldiers to pillage the tomb, as it contains many artifacts related to the aforementioned marks I hate. The Church's leader orders my teacher to kill me, and they try, but my retainer (19M) gets me to safety.

That brinfs us to now. Now that my plan has been revealed and I have made an enemy of the Church, I officially rally my army to declare war on them, as well as the other territories in the continent. I plan to march on the Academy to capture the Church's leader.

I don't think I'm the asshole. I believe what I am doing is what's necessary to ensure a better future for the continent, where people are judged based on merit and not on some arbitrary measure decided by the Church. The Church is an extremely corrupt institution that takes advantage of our faith in the Goddess to exercise absolute power. But I have to say, when my teacher didn't side with me, I felt a bit betrayed. So... am I the asshole?

[stardustbee]

Prologue - Ocean

There stood a stranger, his face hidden under a dark hood

Darth Maul x fem!Jedi OC Ayane Arinori

Canon Story to 'Fly me to the Moon'

Warnings: none

Word count: 1666

Note: hello hello hello dear readers and welcome to the canon version of 'Fly me to the Moon'! This is the prologue and I will slowly update (and add a Masterlist later on) every chapter! This story is also about my OC Ayane Arinori only this time she stays human and becomes a jedi. So a lot of friends to enemies and enemies to lovers between Maul and Ayane here! I really love this idea and hope you enjoy it with me. As always you feedback is welcome!

Taglist • Read on Ao3 • Masterlist

《《 Previous Chapter

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This story is 18+! Minors please do not interact!

A shooting star flew by like a small comet in the clear sky. It went unnoticed by the woman who moved her wet body from the sea to land. Her feet felt the sand, it was finer than that on other planets. The water was salty and more beautiful, the grass greener and the sky on the horizon much more radiant. She let herself sink on the beach and sat down. The sand was still warm even though the sun had set a time ago and night had fallen. Nevertheless, it was never very cold in this part of the planet and the sand probably stored the pleasant warmth of the sun a little longer.  She put her head back as she looked at the stars. How many stars were up there? How many planets are there that she has not yet visited? How many species inhabit them?

The woman with raven-black hair, which she had braided into a long plait, took a deep breath and let herself fall backwards into the warm sand. Her hands stroked through it and she let the grains of sand run through her fingers. Her ice-blue eyes stared up at the sky. She tried not to think of the thousands of questions running through her head. No one would answer them anyway.

Once again a small light flickered across the sky, just like the shooting star before. The woman recognised the flames of a ship's engines. Where did it come from? Were the Jedi sending their minions to take her again? She closed her beautiful eyes and sucked the salty air into her lungs through her slightly open mouth. In her mind, she scanned the ship, trying to sense another identity. She tried it again, like she did many times before, like she trained herself. With the power she had, which no one could bring her closer to and explain. The Jedi often came to visit and take her with them, but her father always found new ways to keep her with him. The Force was so strange and uncanny to her and yet a part of her. She cursed it and yet was fascinated.

Sure enough, she sensed someone on this ship. An identity she was already familiar with, but had not met before. At least not in this life. It felt bleak, concentrated full of anger and hatred. Yet she felt a certain trust, a warmth that she had known all her life without experiencing. Who was on this ship?

She heard a voice calling her. It  called her in the wide, unknown ocean the Force. What was the voice saying? She couldn't understand the words. It felt like an echo. Like a drop that upset the great sea. It made the sea restless and angry and it felt like the water was burying the land underneath it.

The woman sat up again. She felt her heart beat faster and her hands had become sweaty. "How exciting..." she whispered almost inaudibly to herself. Who was the stranger that visited this planet?

Midgard

It was a famous and beautiful planet, but not many came to visit and certainly not without reason. She was now standing on the beach, her gaze fixed on the forest behind her. The water was still dripping from her slender fingers and out of hair. Sand got stuck on the backside of her body.

She rubbed off what she could of the sand. Kriff, she wouldn't be able to get all of the sand off without a shower, that much was clear. The woman continued on her way towards the forest and slipped in the simple white summer dress hanging from a tree on one of the branches. That was all she took with her to the sea of Midgard. She needed nothing more than the wonderful air of the sea, the water and the sand beneath her bare feet.

Her path led her through the forest, through a forest that was like a painting. The ground changed and the sand gave way to green grass and flowers. Small insects buzzed and flew around her and the woman wondered if the ship had already landed. It was flying towards her family's estate. She was already a little worried because she did not know who was heading for her family.

Her fingertips run over the bark of the trees as she steps past them. The dress she wore had a light fabric that fluttered in the gentle breeze. The straps were thin and it clung perfectly to her slender body, accentuating her curves. She wore nothing underneath because she felt it would constrict her. Swimming was her great passion. Feeling the water on her skin was the essence that kept her alive and any piece of cloth would interfere. That is why she usually went far away from the estate to be undisturbed. She wore the wet, braided plait over one shoulder. The wetness revealed what was hidden underneath.

Her bare feet touched the cold stone of the stairs of her home. The young woman, who had reached the age of nineteen, leaned against the large entrance door of the property and wiped the dirt off her feet. Then she put her head back and pressed it against the door. Her eyes wandered again over the sky that bore so many infinite stars. The moon hung in the sky, its color was hard to describe. It seemed as if the sun hung on the horizon, golden rays like the crown of a king.

She relaxed her shoulders, bent her knees a little and slowly closed her eyes. A gust of wind brought the salty scent of the sea to her again. The golden light had burned into her eye. Like a dark spot when you look too long into a sun. Slowly but surely, the gold became a round dot. In the center, a black dot like the iris of an eye. The edges of the circle looked as if red, angry flames were beating around it. Her heart began to beat faster, her breathing was restless.

She felt him before she saw him.

She returned her body to a straight position and slowly walked to the edge of the top step without opening her eyes. The woman perceived a presence in front of her. She could not place it, but it was familiar. Cautiously she stretched out her right hand, her eyes squeezed tightly shut. Who was there? His eyes were boring into her body, she sensed it, and it made her tremble. Her fingers twitched in minimal movements, like they danced across the keys of her piano.

Under her delicate fingertips she felt a material that was similar to leather. It was smooth and pleasant. She carefully ran her fingers over it and noticed that a hand was hidden under the material. A pleasant and tickling feeling spread in her stomach. The material squeaked a little as the hand closed around hers. The other hand, the stranger's, was larger than her own.

Very slowly she opened her eyes and her lips parted. There stood a stranger, his face hidden under a dark hood. The woman exhaled through her mouth. The stranger was dressed in dark, black robes. They reminded the woman of the earth-coloured tones of the Jedi, the bringers of peace to the galaxy. But something was different about this man. His head moved slowly from the bottom to the top. His eyes peered over the edge of the black hood. Everything about him was too familiar to her and yet so incredibly foreign. She had never dealt with such a man in this galaxy. Every movement, every twitch of his muscles caught her eye.

Then she looked into the man's eyes. They burned like the lights of the moon. Golden they were, looking directly into hers, and the woman flinched. Still, she did not let go of his hand. What was this strange moment? How could she feel him so intensely? Those eyes…

Like the vision she had a few minutes ago. She knew this man even if she could barely make out his face in the darkness. Something in her wished that this moment with this stranger would not pass. He seemed so mysterious and interesting to her. The way he held her hand was so gentle. As if he had already placed it on his own hundreds of times.

And yet it ended the moment the doors of the large mansion opened. A bright light fell on the woman's back and for a brief moment she recognised the face hidden under the hood. It was a beautiful and attractive face for her, underlined by black tattoos and accentuated by the red skin of the stranger. A Zabrak? The woman did not have much time to look at the face, for standing in the doorway was none other than the head of the Arinori family, her father, Gwydion Arinori. Member of the Grand Senate of the Republic on Coruscant. His deep voice rang out somewhat sternly through his thick beard, which, like the woman's hair, sparkled with a blue glow. Time, however, had already left its mark on his skin and in his hair. Wrinkles stretched around his eyes as well as at the corners of his mouth and gray and white streaks could be seen in his hair.

"Ayane Arinori." he spoke in a low tone.

Quickly, Ayane turned around without letting go of the stranger's hand. Somehow she was afraid he would disappear if she did so. Her father knew she was sneaking away, swimming through the ocean rather than doing her duties. She feared he would reprimand her for it, and then in front of this strange man. Instead, his face brightened and he smiled as he made some space. The old man made a welcoming motion and beckoned her and her mysterious new acquaintanceship in.

"Come in. I have a few things to discuss with our guest.”

Taglist! Tell me if I shall add or remove you

@eloquentmoon @elledjarin @bacarasbabe @marivenah @saradika @pixiestookourstardust @justalittletomato @herbalinz-of-yesteryear @oh-three @nobody-expects-the-inquisitorius @lune-de-miel-au-paradis @dukeoftheblackstar

[charles-simmons]

My "small" essays on why Sootcest has actual interesting ships, except I'm only writing this to piss off a friend who hates selfcest. I'll send it to her later

Episode 1: Ghostbur x Revivebur

This is probably the most famous Sootcest ship, which makes sense. They have almost opposite personalities and even opposite colors schemes (blue vs red). These are common characteristics in ships, because people love seeing character that could never get along together being together.

But besides from that, what makes the ship specially interesting is the fact they're technically the same person. Now, some people might disagree with that. They have different memories, opinions, and act differently from each other. There are multiple theories on why the ghosts don't act like their alive version, which is something I can talk about on a different analysis. The point is, they're kind of the same person, but not quite the same person.

There's one thing that needs to be clear for this analysis and that is: Wilbur wasn't murdered, his death was assisted suicide. He begged for his father to kill him and it was his decision to die.

With that in mind, it's hard to believe someone who wanted his own life to end would fall in love with himself, or, in this case, a version of himself.

Ghostbur is a version of Wilbur who (supposedly) has no bad memories. Our experiences and everything we went through is what shapes who we are. Since Ghostbur doesn't have many of Wilbur's bad memories, It's like he didn't even live these things, therefore, didn't became the person Wilbur did. So, to a level, Ghostbur is the person Wilbur could've been if it wasn't for all the trauma he went through - trauma that led to him losing his mind.

Let's talk about Revivebur specifically now, the man who wanted to end his existence, but had to endure 13 years in limbo. Canonically, for him to be revived, Dream had to kill Ghostbur. In the few moments where Ghostbur was mentioned to him, he expressed dislike towards him or avoided the subject, which is understandable. For some it must feel violating to have someone who looks like you walking around and interacting with the people you knew. Someone as proud as Wilbur would probably hate the idea of being impersonated (not that that was what Ghostbur did, but it seemed to have felt like it). There's also the fact that people seemed to like Ghostbur better than him.

With all of that I think I can say that neither of them seem to have a positive opinion about each other. Revivebur has shown discomfort when it comes to Ghostbur, and Ghostbur is simply too different from Wilbur to even aprove or understand some of his actions.

Even if it was possible for them to coexist and for Wilbur to be revived without Ghostbur dying, there's a high chance they would simply avoid each other and actually live their lifes as different people. The idea of them actually actually falling in love is unlikely, which is what makes it interesting. They would have to face a lot of discomfort to even be around each other, let alone start liking each other. There's too much guilt and self hatred coming from both of them, which makes me wonder how toxic a relationship like that would be. Ghostbur would probably have a "I can fix him" mindset, while Wilbur would probably be dry and cold most of times, then "compensate" by giving him attention every now and then. Maybe with time they would actually do some good to each other, or maybe not and it would end up being a bad thing.

Regardless of all of this, Ghostbur and Revivebur are both very complex characters, so we don't know for sure what or how it would happen. The fact this ship is even a thing is funny, but it does have potential to be an actual chance to understand more about these two characters and how they perceive themselves and their own worth, which is why I genuinely think this ship is interesting. And with that, I conclude this essay.

Thank you if you read all of this by the way. My next one will probably be about Argbur and Incelbur. This is way too fun to write, so even if no one reads it I'll probably write it anyway.

[ath16blf]

Juu Kinjo (platonic) x Reader x Tsurugi Kinjo (platonic): adoptive family

This was not requested, I just wanted to write. thanks to Pizza Morgania ( @ultimatesinger ) for the help with Juu, Yamato and Mikako.

A little of angst and many of fluff

The Reader is gender neutral so I go by they/them

-----------------------------

"Ugh" I sighed again at the umpteenth question of why I don't look like my father or my brother. I ended up saying, “It’s because I was adopted." the looks change to either disgust or sympathy or pity. Just pathetic, human pity keep it to yourself. The memories of that day come back to me all of a sudden and my world goes black leaving me alone with it.

I saw a lighted room that of my old kitchen and my family discussing something, I prick up my ears to listen. My father: “It can't go on like this! Why are we still feeding this thing?! My mother: “For child benefit, two children give a share after all…” My sister: “Yeah…. For what little it brings us." My grandmother in her old know-it-all voice: “They’s just unemployed ! At them age, I went to the mine and I brought money, I did not go to school to make friends that I would never see again when I retired." My sister: “Pfff and to think that grandfather always took them defense! I'm glad he's in a coma! Let him die! My mother in her honeyed voice: "Come on, we don't say that~ we say: ''I wish he slept forever.'' We don't know if we are really alone… »

This memory… came back but surprisingly I no longer shed a tear, the room becomes dark again and changes to give way to me crying in a corner and who is determined to leave this family. The past self eventually comes out of the house to seek support from the friends I have made. I watched her arrive at the door when suddenly a voice spoke with another person, I immediately recognized the voices of Ueshida Joji and Taji Tsuzi. My best friends…. Ueshida to Taji: "Listen, I've thought about it but I don't think we can stay friends…" Taji: "Are you serious, poor moron ?! After all I've done for you? That I stayed with the other one there that I don't love and that I never loved and that I put up with after all these years ! That I pretended to be her best friend all because you pity them ! » Ueshida: « No you didn't understand… In fact I love you and lovingly not like a friend but reassure you I don't like them either, I don't like (your name) you see they was just making me pity to stay alone in his corner but if I had never known I would have taken these steps. »

I saw after that the me of the past go in an alley without making noises with flowing tears and I had again these feelings of hatred, anger and sadness even of despair but this time, I am only spectator The past self starts screaming in anger with flowing tears: “IT’S JUST GARBAGE! ALL I WANTED FOR ME WAS FRIENDS! A FAMILY ! NO DAMN HYPOCRITES! HUMANITY? HAVE A HEART? WHAT A LOT OF BULLSHIT! ANIMALS HAVE MORE HUMANITY!" They paused to calm down and expressed himself normally: “They never wanted me? All right, I'll take my things and run away. »

The fade to black returns and this time I see the me of the past under a bridge with all my things in a ball, unfortunately I don't see any blankets since there was no more room because of the summer clothes and winter and everything I refused to let them, even if it meant selling them to get water, food and something to keep warm. I heard a familiar voice: “Hey kid, what are you doing here in the middle of the night? Are you running away ?" They lifts her head to see a man with red eyes and short blue gray hair with a beautiful scar over his right eye. This man is called Juu Kinjo, a policeman of an important section, quite famous besides in spite of his ideals. He seemed a little annoyed: “So? You lost your tongue ?" The past self nods, tears still flowing. Juu: “Well answer, then. What are you doing here all alone?" "…..I was running away from my 'family'" Juu: "Why?" They stares into space without reacting. Juu: "…Are you going to sit there still for a long time or…?" I see myself rubbing my arms irregularly and I remember that I was close to having an anxiety attack, it's quite strange to see the leader reach out his hand to the me of the past and say: "You will be warmer in a house." and me suddenly stepping back and hitting the wall behind my back. Juu: “…Don't be afraid, I won't hurt you. Come on, come on." Well, I finally get up, following him with the things and at a good distance.

A new fade of black arrives and then I relive the past me walking in literally looking everywhere and I remember again the lovely decoration and organization of the storage of this house even if they are super stuck. Juu: "Tsurugi" he calls his son who arrives in police uniform. He shows them: “We have a guest. » Tsurugi also looks at the guest: « Hello… » still not very talkative. Juu: “…I'll let you get to know each other. He goes into the kitchen.

The silence is total, we can almost hear the flies flying and finally Tsurugi decides to show the house just to loosen up the situation a bit while his father, who is not at all talkative, prepares food. He finally finishes finishing the kitchen and setting the table when Tsurugi finishes the little visit. The past me arrives all trembling and pale when mr Psycho Cop arrives calmly. Dad serves them: "…So what's your name?" » I can see him asking me this question to which I answered trembling and being pale: « (your first name)…. » Juu : « … Delighted." It almost looks like a frightened little hamster who doesn't dare eat. Tsurugi: "….Good appetit." he begins to eat. Juu: “…You can eat, you know. Especially if it's been a long time since you've eaten anything." the past me really doesn't look good until it curls up with its hands on its head. Juu: "…How long have you been 'running away'?' " while saying to himself, since it's easy to guess, that it's not won, then he takes me gently in his arms without rushing, obviously not very good at hugs or gestures of affection. The me of the past ends up shaking strongly while murmuring: "……. I am not a criminal………….." very traumatized by what the little psycho cop while dad keeps them in his arms to try to calm us down while the past me cries until he falls asleep after a while out of sheer fatigue.

New black fade sign that there is a new memory either a few months after that of my memory, Juu ended up adopting me. I remember the day when my first meeting with the Kisagari family who came to the house where Hanzo talks with dad and Yamato and Mikako to hang out with brother. I see myself bothering my poor brother with the duvets, this memory makes me smile a lot and I see Hanzo talking with dad in the living room after his arrival and Tsurugi running to escape me, passes in front of Yamato and Mikako. Yamato: “Hey, Tsu! Mikako: "Oh, well, do you have a guest?" " " BRO ! YOUR DUVETS ! " the past self pursues Tsurugi who continues to run.

Yamato: “. . . Bro ? Ohhhh! “The inventive genius has just understood while his exorcist sister has not understood: “Hm ??" I keep chasing him around the garden: "It should be illegal to run away from your sibling ! » the inventor obviously wants to bother this poor Tsurugi so helps us to pursue him, Mikako has a slight amused smile watching Tsurugi run: « The poor." "Brother~ come on it's just two quilts! » continues to run, Tsurugi: continues to run, rather enduring until our inventor ends up catching up and intercepting Tsurugi who ends up pinning him to the ground, the poor guy is surprised while I do a: "Brother" and I jumps on his back while Mikako joins us. Tsurugi: "Nice to see you again, Yama' " Yamato: ". . . Did you have to tackle me to the ground, Tsu'?" the poor man is jaded while Mikako sneers: "Poor brother~ You're to be pitied~" Yamato: "Hush!" he ends up extremely jaded. Tsurugi: "Yes, so how are you? It's been a very long time since we've seen each other. » Yamato: « Well listen, as usual, it's fine, even if Mikako spends her time pissing me off » Mikako: « It's not true!" she crosses her arms, outraged. Tsurugi: “I have the same at home. "Brother, that's wrong! I am adorable !" snuggled up against Tsurugi's back. Yamato: “…I see that. Who is they, then? Mikako looks at us. Tsurugi: “My adopted sibling." the past self kisses Tsurugi on the head while cuddling him. Inventor: “Ooohhh. Well, welcome to the club, you'll see how painful it is to have an adoptive sibling~” Mikako ends up crossing her arms, blased: “He said while yesterday it was him who had fun doing my makeup like a clown. » Tsurugi: « I already know it, Yama' » gets up still carrying (your first name) on his back «…Don't give him ideas." Yamato sneers: "And besides, I still have the picture~" Mikako: "What?! Erase it!" the poor girl is red with embarrassment. Tsurugi: “Show~” Mikako: “I forbid you!" Yamato shows the photo to Tsurugi where we see Mikako with a beautiful clown makeup and who does not seem very happy. Tsurugi holds back laughter until a photo of Tsurugi in disney princess is shown to Mikako and Yamato who looks at the photo and ends up bursting out laughing: "Ooohhh, but it's that he's cute as that~” Mikako bursts out laughing: “I should do the same with you, bro~” “Anyway, who are you ?" to Yamato and Mikako.

Yamato finally calms down: “Yamato Kisaragi, Tsu's best friend." Mikako also calms down: "And I'm Mikako Kurokawa, her adorable adoptive sister~" Yamato jaded: "…Adorable but very boring." « Pleased then, I am (your first name) Kinjo~ » Tsurugi still flushed with embarrassment : « Yeah…. She took my last name » Yamato : « I see that. You should do the same with mine, Mikako. » Mikako : « Stop insisting, head of mule ! No is no ! " " She does what she wants. » hugs Tsurugi tightly for a huge hug. Mikako: “Exactly! Head of mule, go!" Yamato: "It's okay, it's okay, I just say it like that, no need to yell at me." » Tsurugi: « Yama', have you ever been Mikako's horse? Yamato: “Nah, why ?" Tsurugi: "…..Because I became their horse." » Yamato snorts: "Ah well okay." Mikako holds back a laugh. Tsurugi: "How are you, bro/sis ? Well installed?" "Yup~" Kisagari and Kurokawa snicker. I gently strokes Tsurugi's hair: "Let's go home~" Tsurugi gently lays us down on the floor. Yamato: "God…She looks just as annoying as you, Mikako~" Mikako: "I'm not annoying!" growls a little. We cross our arms: “I am not painful !" Tsurugi walks in with the other three.

Yamato: “Yeah~” Mikako crosses her arms, sulky “Naughty! one hits Yamato on the head. Yamato: “Ouch! " "No but !" Tsurugi: “Troublesome like your sister, I don't know but on the other hand, a bad temper if." takes them to his room. Yamato: "I see that…" Mikako snickers: "Well done, bro~" Yamato growls a little, jaded. Mikako: "Grumpy~" Yamato sits on Tsurugi's bed. Psycho cop: "What's up? » sits down. Yamato: “…Not much. And you ? Mikako sits down too. Tsurugi: “Other than my adoptive sibling, that's all. Yamato: “Oh, okay." "Brother, aren't you telling him about your letter?~" Yamato: "? Which letter ?" Mikako looks at Tsurugi. He gets up and looks for something on his desk. Yamato and Mikako stared at Tsurugi, wondering what you're talking about when talking about a letter. he ends up coming back with a letter well gives the letter to Yamato, this letter is the letter from hope's peak academy saying that bro has been accepted into the school as the ultimate police officer next year. Yamato has stars in his eyes all excited « Ooohhh, but that's great, congratulations, Tsu! » Tsurugi: « Yes. » we are totally jaded « And that idiot didn't even warn dad » Mikako: « And that surprises you? Yamato patted Tsurugi's head, happy for him. Tsurugi: "And you Yama'? "Nope but I feel like I'm going to tell him." Mikako: “. . . I know another one who didn't tell Dad either. I found the letter on his desk, he really needs to learn how to put his things away if he wants to keep secrets~” Tsurugi: “Good! Ultimate inventor? Yamato nods, a little embarrassed. Mikako pat pat Yamato's head: "There's nothing to be embarrassed about~ Or even worried~ I'm sure our comrades will be nice~" "I have an idea, we'll go see our fathers and we'll tell them!~" Mikako: "… That's good, I was just planning to say for Yamato at the same time as for me." Yamato: "I didn't give you permission!" all embarrassed. Tsurugi: “Me neither! we hold back laughter and I see myself going downstairs with Mikako: “Dad! Dad ! »

Mikako: “Daddyyyyy~! Yamato: “. . . Why am I so disrespected? » Tsurugi pat pat and goes to join them with Yamato. We arrive. Yamato embarrassed and follows Tsurugi: "…I wonder how I manage to put up with her…" Juu: "What's going on?" Mikako: "Dad, big brother and I have something to tell you!" We got accepted to Hope's Peak Academy” Tsurugi: “Courage. Hanzo: "Oh that's great!" "Brother got accepted to Hope's Peak Academy too!" Yamato growls a little and walks over, still embarrassed. Mikako: "Big brother was taken as the ultimate inventor~ And me as the ultimate exorcist !" Yamato: “. . . Wait, what?! You didn't tell me that, Mikako !" Mikako: "You don't need to know everything~" Yamato growls and crosses his arms: "Come on! Juu: "Really?" That's great. Hanzo: "I'm proud of you!" And I also have something to tell you finally, we have something to tell you. Mikako: “Hm? » hug to Yamato who is slightly sulky and looks at his father. Juu looks away slightly, as if embarrassed. Hanzo: "Don't be embarrassed, Juju~" Tsurugi: "Juju? the past self stops laughing: “Juju? Yamato looks at his father, then Juu, then back to his father: “Really?! Mikako doesn't understand Juu is slightly red: "I don't see what you're talking about!" Slightly tsun-tsun. Hanzo: “Yeah, really. » softly takes Juu in her arms « We're a couple! Tsurugi passed out in shock. Yamato has stars in his eyes again “Oooooooohhhhh~~! Mikako also passed out, completely shocked, Juu blushed: "Tact, Hanzo, tact." the past self choked back laughter and tried to revive Tsurugi. Hanzo: “I should have told them, honey~”

Yamato: "Dad doesn't know the word tact, let's see~" tries to wake Mikako. Juu still red: “That's no reason. I still keep getting him revived. Hanzo tenderly takes Juu in his arms: “Silence my tsun-tsun~” Yamato ends up slapping Mikako to wake her up: “Get up, sis~” Mikako ends up waking up after a while: “Hmm. ..” Juu even redder: “I'm not tsun-tsun !" "Brother, regain consciousness." Otherwise I'll steal your gun~” Hanzo: “Yes! » Yamato : « Ah bah finally! Mikako gets up suddenly and looks at her father and Juu: "…It really wasn't a dream." Yamato: "Nope~" Juu still then growls a little. Tsurugi regains consciousness: "…..Don't take my gun!" Hanzo kissed Juu.

Mikako doesn't know how to react, Yamato: "How are you, Mikako? You don't look very happy. Mikako: "S-Yes, yes, of course, but uh… 'end… It's… It's just quite sudden." looks away. Juu totally red and responds to the kiss. I hold back laughter, Tsurugi: “…..So it wasn't a dream, my best friend becoming my stepbrother. doesn't sound happy about it. Hanzo continues to kiss him tenderly. Yamato: “…S-Sure. But at least dad will be happy, right…? Mikako: "…T-That's not what I mean, big brother…" “A problem, brother ?" Yamato: “Come on, don't you trust your big brother ?" Mikako: "I never said I didn't trust you, stop making up bullshit."

Yamato gently takes Mikako in his arms: “Hey… It's not because we're going to be a blended family that dad and I are going to love you less, you know." Mikako snuggled against Yamato: "If you say so…" Tsurugi: "No, it's fine." » take him tenderly in his arms « Bad liar." Tsurugi stares at Yamato without saying anything. I say, "Ohhhhh~" Yamato: "So what's wrong?" Mikako: “. . . Are you deaf or are you dumb? I said, t-it's just too sudden… Then there's way too much news all of a sudden, between that and then the fact that we got accepted to Hope's Peak, what's the next step ?!" I'm very happy and I'm going to see Yamato~ Mikako: "See, I'm sure even you find this too sudden." Yamato sighs: "No… the end of course is sudden, but… If dad is happy then why not… It doesn't cost anything to try to deal with… Yes?" “Hey Kisagari! » Tsurugi: « Nope! Nope !" covers our mouth. Mikako: "…How do you manage to be so positive?" Yamato: “I'm just trying to look on the bright side. Then all I want is to see the others happy, so if it makes my dad happy to be with Tsu's, I can't do anything but be happy for him. "Hmpf Hmpf!" struggles to talk to Yamato. Mikako: "…Sometimes I think we're really quite different, you and I…" Yamato shrugs: "Maybe."

Hanzo slowly pulls away from the kiss. Juu is still red. Hanzo puts him on his lap. Tsurugi: "Nope! Don't do that !" Hanzo: "We'll have to live together with the kids~" Juu still: "Give them time to get used to it, right?" Hanzo: "I never said right away" Juu: “I know. Hanzo: “We will give them time." Juu: “Good." Hanzo: "I wasn't going to settle down with you right away anyway~"

Mikako looks at Tsurugi and us: “What are you two doing ?" Yamato: "Hmm?" also looks at them. we wave our arms in a way to say: ''help'' Tsurugi: “Nothing at all !" Mikako removes Tsurugi's hand from our mouth and blocks him so we can talk: "Go ahead, please~" Yamato: "Wtf.. .” Tsurugi tackles Mikako to the ground: “NO! SAY NOTHING ! "Yay!~ so you see….." ~ to Yamato. Mikako holds Tsurugi down to keep him from moving. Yamato: “Hmm? I'm listening to you.

Juu: “. . . Anyway before you settle down you have to make room for everyone, baka~” Hanzo: "I have enough space in my house~" Juu: “You definitely have the answer~” glares at him. Hanzo: "Right~" Juu: "You know moving in with someone isn't a snap~ You'll have to be patient, dear~" Hanzo: "That's true but I have the money for~" Juu: "I wasn't talking about money~" Hanzo: "Hm ?" Juu: “I'm talking about time. A move is not done in three seconds, and even less in a single day, especially given all the mess we have. I know we have enough money, I'm not stupid either~” Hanzo caresses Juu's hands: "That's right~"

Tsurugi is the ultimate police officer, so he give Mikako an armbar. “My brother is in love with you !" Mikako: "Ngh." Yamato: “. . . What ? "Yeah~" Tsurugi quickly gets out of Mikako's grip: "Did you already forget that I'm a policeman?~"Mikako: "Hmpf, whatever, it's too late anyway, your secret has already been told~" Yamato becomes very quiet, not seeming to realize that it's the truth. Tsurugi becomes silent. We say, “Uh, are you okay ?"

Mikako looks at Yamato "Brother…? How are you ?" Yamato: "Uh… Yeah?" I believe ? I dunno ?" Looks totally lost, "I think your brother bugs" Mikako: "Surely… Or he's just afraid to put a rake on Tsu'… 'well I don't know, he doesn't really talk about his feelings so it's hard to guess…" Yamato looks at Tsurugi without saying anything. Us: “Probably. » Tsurugi remains silent

Mikako sighs: "If only he was better at showing his feelings…" Yamato opens his mouth to speak but ends up saying nothing and just looks away. We say: “It's clear….” fixed Yamato “…… Speak. Yamato remains silent Mikako: "Brother, if you don't express yourself, we can't guess your feelings, you know…" the past self says: "Speak." stares at him. Yamato is still silent. Mikako sighs, "…What's wrong, bro?" Are you afraid to tell him it's not mutual? Or is it something else? » I look at Hanzo and Juu who continue their kiss on the sofa: « Do your stuff in a bedroom not in the living room !" Yamato still doesn't answer. Mikako: "…Brother…?" Tell us…” Juu is totally red. Hanzo just as red: "…. They is right ! " takes Juu who turns even redder in her arms to go to the bedroom.

Yamato ended up muttering something incomprehensible Mikako: “. . . This is a joke, right ?" Tsurugi: "It's okay, Yama'" goes to his room. Yamato looks away. Mikako: "Brother? » Yamato : « I… I-I just don't want to break our relationship… » Mikako : « . . . the past me: "…..So you don't love him lovingly" Yamato: "I… I don't know… 'well… I like being with him." .. To see him smile… And piss him off… But… 'end… I don't know… I never really thought that I could see him other than as a best friend… Besides, I'm not really gifted with feelings…” Mikako tells herself that love is complicated. We say, "So you're not in love with him, you just love him as a friend" Yamato: "I…I think…" "…The unsaid is horrible…. Yamato: "…And how do you want me to tell him that?" He has already taken it badly to learn that your father and mine are in a relationship, if in addition I give him a rake it will not help things…" "He took it badly because he is in love with you! Yamato: “I know! That's why if I give him a rake it won't help the situation! "I'm afraid brother is imagining the worst things!" Yamato: "And I don't want to break him… He's already just learned that the one he loves is going to become his half-brother, imagine his reaction if he learns that his feelings aren't not reciprocated…” “I think he already knows that! Do you think he's stupid? Yamato: "I didn't say he was stupid and how could he know that when I don't show anyone my feelings? Even my own adoptive sister doesn't know how I feel !" Mikako: "…"

"….I think he suspects it but knowing him, I think he must be thinking that you hate him or something like that" Yamato: "Hate him?" But anyway, in what dimension could I hate him? He's still my best friend… Never in my life could I hate him or even replace him…” “….Tsu' is worse than paranoid. Once he shook me while I was sleeping because he thought I was dead. Yamato: “. . . Well, the first time I hear that…” all surprised Mikako: “. . . Oh yes anyway. » « When I finally woke up I punched him in the face and then I went back to sleep » Yamato: « Poor guy… » Mikako holds back laughter: « What violence ! »

"And then when it was time to get up, I…" her story ends. Yamato: "Do you have? "…..Imagine the rest~" Yamato: ". . ." Mikako: "…I don't know what you did but one thing is certain, brother you should go see him to reassure him…" "Exactly! During this time I tell the rest to your sister who must swear to me not to tell you » Yamato sighs: « Ok… » go see Tsurugi. Mikako: “I won't say anything, I promise. “Good” settles in the living room with her. “So I was saying, I saw bro in my arms. I saw that he had fallen asleep after crying a lot. That's all." Mikako: “I see… Poor Tsu'”

Yamato arrive at Tsurugi's room and knock… "Tsu'?" Yamato hears crying which I don't understand since it's supposed to be MY memory not Yamato's, coming from his room and moans of pleasure coming from Juu's room. Yamato enters Tsurugi's room: "Tsu'…?" the poor Tsurugi still continues to cry in bed. Yamato closes the door and slowly approaches Tsurugi: "Tsu'… I-I'm sorry…" Tsurugi still continues to cry. He gently takes Tsurugi in his arms: "… I… It's not mutual, Tsu', sorry… But that doesn't change the fact that I could never hate you or replace you… I promise…” The black fade is present again, end of memories….

Once the end of class bell rings, I go home until I meet those I loved and who didn't love me back. “My mother”: “What are you doing here?! Why did you run away? “My father”: “My adorable son/daughter, come! My sister: “H-hey well, it’s been a long time since we saw each other. What are you becoming, why did you leave? I just tell them, “….. Who are you? » then I leave, the one I called mom grabs my arm to prevent me from leaving: « Hey sir/miss! Not so fast, you have to go home! “I give her an armbar so that she lets go of me: “Let go of me, criminal b*tch !" Then afterwards I violently pushed him on the one I called dad: “I don’t know you !" I ended up running away so I could go home to join my lovely brothers and my only sister as well as my two dads who got married and moved in together.

Thanks to him, my adored dad avoided becoming a psycho commissioner and my brother stopped being a psycho cop even if they are still attached to justice and to eradicating evil, they finally understood that fighting evil by evil is not the solution, thank you very much Death Note and second dad.

END

[visualheresy]

“What Jackson leaves unilluminated, that vast shadowy region beyond the very bright edge of the story is mystery. It’s mystery that makes a story feel like it’s happening in a world, a continuous moral field. It’s mystery that makes it feel as though what we’re watching unfold has some meaning, that it matters to the people to whom it is happening. But we can’t have mystery without clear illumination of the narrative field. If we don’t understand what is happening and to whom and how they feel about it, we never arrive at the bright edge of the known story world. We can’t appreciate how vast, how dark the sky because the whole world is pitch-black and vague.

I believe that you arrive at such clarity by including in your story a lot of the things that you might consider boring, or obvious. Things that when you are drafting them make you roll your eyes or which feel too big to try to put into a couple sentences. Grief. Pain. The agony of jealousy. Desire. Love. Hatred. Terror. The big feelings. The nature of relationships. Who is dating whom. Who is whose brother. Who is whose father. Who is broke. Who is rich. Who has what job. Whose dog is that. And why do you struggle to include these things? Because you think it will be boring? To write about the material reality of your characters? Shirley Jackson describes the weather in the start of her most famous story, but you’re too good to tell us that your character has a sister who died and now she’s going to the family home where they were terrorized by a mean nanny when they young? You want the mean nanny to be revealed somewhere around page eight? Rather than page one? So we just have to watch your character drift through rooms with a forlorn look on her face amid half-snatches of memory?

When I tell authors to try to bore me, to dedicate space and time to the listing of details about the circumstances of their characters, I am trying to get them to stop thinking in terms of psychology and abstraction. I am trying to get them to move away from their very excellent and refined taste, to forget the examples of the books they have read, and to focus instead on the surface of their story. Have they considered the most basic facts of their character standing in a room of strangers for the first time? Why have we not told the reader how the character has arrived to such a place? Why have we not told the reader what they hope to get out of being in such a place?What is the temperature of the room? What is the temperature of the wine? Is there a skin on the gravy at the buffet? What are the people talking about? Really, what are they talking about. The tax code? Lacrosse scores? Basketball? Politics? Religion? Are they telling bad jokes? Naughty jokes? Are the women eating? Are they pointedly not eating? Does the room smell like it’s been smoked in? How long have they been waiting in this room? What are they waiting for? Is there a chance that this might be the moment their life changes? Is that what they want? Are there children? Are the children laughing?

…

I ask for boring stuff because of something one of my teachers, Charles D’Ambrosio, said to my class, which was that we were very good at depth and what we should focus on was surface. I didn’t really get that either. I was trying to write psychologically astute fiction about the souls of contemporary black faggots. I wanted to write think-y books. But more and more, I’ve come around to his way of thinking. People are really smart now, and I think it’s making our writing worse. Sometimes what you need is fidelity to the concrete, surface reality of a story world. Jackson’s opening paragraph with the trees and the weather and the date. The way she captures the daily rhythms of life in the village. Or, even, to think of Tolstoy, the long descriptions at the start of Anna Karenina, in which we hear about the slippers and the sofa and the rooms. One needs the boring stuff. It makes the story feel cozy. Lived-in. But also, it directs the reader deeper into the world of the fiction. It’s the very engine of show, don’t tell. The material world of the story.”

- The Virtues of the Boring Draft by Brandon Taylor

[ask-sister-solaris]

“Kiss The Go Goat”

Young Nihil x OC

Cilia and her friend had been lucky enough to get tickets to a concert. It was amazing! The songs were catchy and the lead singer was…hot. Cilia was stood at the front looking up at him the entire time. As one of the songs ended however he knelt down and kissed her, quite passionately, pulling away his makeup now smudged around his lips.

Cilia put a hand to her lips and blushed, not seeing the young blonde on the balcony shoot you a look of jealousy and hatred. The lead looked up at the balcony devastated and looked back at Cilia her friend was freaking out but she was just stood there. Her first kiss…was with a famous singer. She looked up at him and blushed again.

It was then and there Nihil realized. He’d lost Imperator. The one he yearned for, or had been yearning for. He’d never dated outside the ministry or had any romantic attraction to anyone outside the ministry due to his father. His first proper kiss was with a outsider, who was quite good looking. He hadn’t been dating Imperator because he wanted to, but because he was made to.

After the concert was truly over and people had started going home and such, Nihil searched for the woman he had kissed, finally locating her at the gates.

“Mio caro! Wait for me”

He rushed up to her and panted, grabbing her hands. He didn’t want to blow the bands cover, not yet.

“Please…Tesoro, join me tonight for dinner…to make up for that kiss, si?”

Cilia smiled and looked at him bashfully. Was he really asking her out? Or was it another prank from her co-workers. Her friend got in the taxi and she watched as it drove off.

“I’ll join you for dinner, under the condition I am able to stay at your place tonight…long story short…I’m being evicted from my flat and the plan was I stay at my friends but she’s kinda- gone”

Nihils gaze softened and he rubbed cilias knuckles. He didn’t know what it was like to be thrown out but he knew what it was like to..well…be left alone. He nodded and the joy that filled his heart when Cilia smiled…Satanas.

“Si amore mio. I’ll allow it”

The dinner went smoothly, they got along very well, talking about their lives (While it was obvious Nihil hiding something) She didn’t care. He listened to her, he made her feel heard. None of her exs had done that.

“Nihil…I wanted to thank you. For everything. But I can tell your hesitant to tell me something”

He froze and looked down bashfully. He went to speak before Cilias lips connected with his. A small smile quirked up on her lips.

“Nothing could make me hate you. I…I want to get to know you, to bond with you. To learn all your secrets while you unravel mine”

Nihil was very taken aback but relieved. Taking her hand he led her to the Ministry. But she didn’t pull away, or even let out a small gasp. She just smiled. That smile that would make Satanas melt.

A very cross Imperator and a fuming Father was waiting. But upon seeing just how smitten Nihil was, his father backed off slightly. He did care about his sons happiness but he knew that if the girl was to stay, she would have to marry Nihil, be initiated into the Clergy. Otherwise she wasn’t allowed in. Those were the rules. You had to be in the Clergy to even step into the Ministry. If you were to enter with a papa.

[REDACTED Years later]

Nihil was sat in his office looking through a picture book. Most of them were of Cilia on their wedding day, or pictures of during and after her four pregnancies. Cilia herself didn’t look a day over 40, but her body was failing her. She could no longer walk without a stick or walker, she was unable to do things that she could do before such as sewing. She had really bad eyesight so her glasses had to be quite thick. But she would always make sure that her husband was ok.

The funny thing is, even though Nihil is married, he still flirted slightly with Imperator. It was more jokey flirting and Cilia knew it. That’s who her husband was. As for her sons they were still mamas boys despite being in their 50s and 60s themselves.

In Cilias words “Your never to old to be scolded by your mother”

[fatalflawsy]

Aww thank you! I'm glad you like it and I do wanna do more with it but it'll probably be some crack posts about the interactions since I can't write for my life

But this really has been giving me brain juice for it.

Mikey God Of Food And Harvest but when enraged he will become God Of Flames his body will emit heat that will probably burn you alive if you're in his sights. Other than that he's pretty chill.

Donnie is god of Knowledge and Innovative but with a bit of madness to the side (I am basing this off some of his inventions) innovation because he's waaay beyond his time.

For Casey and Cassandra I like you're take in them a lot but I have this what if feeling... What if Casey Jr was a demi god? Cassandra went down to earth every once in a while but ended up with Casey we never got to see who the father is so this could be changed.

For Raph I will stick with your idea for him but with a twist which is his anger issues he doesn't take it out on his family but instead on the battlefield (which is the infamous savage Raph episodes) but after going down to earth with rage on the mind and comes across animals he tries manages his anger in a more healthy way so the animals will be okay there are times it slips due to his frustration on his brothers but he has developed some steps on how to calm himself and animals are the most calming ones.

April your idea on her and I'll add to it April out of everyone in the Pantheon has actually been down to earth more times than even splinter has and has more experience in it than everyone else so they usually go to her for advice and for the brothers effective ways of sneaking out and checking out the scene of the mortal plains. April is impulsive at times usually jumping in without thinking so sometimes she disguises herself as a mortal to have fun and maybe cause some minor inconveniences. Her companion Mayhem was a spirit animal found by Raph and given to April so she has a companion when she goes down to the mortal realm and keep her from causing a lot of destruction when she's having fun. Most of the time Mayhem is her best friend and would not trade him for the world. (I wish I had more Mayhem content so I'm making it)

Splinter Head of the Pantheon and the former/forgotten God Of Fame And Fortune before leading the Pantheon he was a very famous god back then (his Lou jitsu days) everyone wanted to be his follower for the many treasures he could give but an accident led to him hiding away and never returning to the mortal plains again slowly being forgotten by time. (Mutation is the accident) (I still have yet to flesh out the accident)

Draxum the God of Alchemy, Magic and Plants he has a deep seated hatred for the mortals back then due to them destroying the village he used to watch over (hidden city) the mortals put the remaining citizens in hiding and it enraged him resulting in many experiments that gave Splinter his accident and his 4 sons. Eventually he let's go of this anger to raise the technically teenage sons of splinter and keeps an open mind about the mortals below.

Leo I'm going with your idea for him which is God of Strategy and Travel at the moment his portals need a conduit to open (like all his brothers and their own abilities) but soon he will learn to use it without the conduit. He basically convinced Splinter to let him and his brothers go down to earth after people watching for ages he wants to get into the action.

In the people watching days when they used to sneak out to see the Mortal world Leo runs into several battles every now and then and sees patterns their battle strategists miss so after observing each side's motivation and drive with some divine intervention he gives the good guys the winning strategies by whispering it through the battle strategists ears or in the wind and that was the start of a myth that circulated around the battle strategists and some warriors. The myth was called Winds of Strategy (name needs to be changed) as it said a God was the one feeding them their strategies and they were merely following it which was true

Leo seeing how he was helping people asked if he could stay down for a period of time to gain some followers and spread his influence further and Splinter denied at first but eventually gives in thanks to April. So Leo was the first of his brothers to get a cult of people to worship him as his brothers were still unsure if they should gain some followers themselves even with their divine interventions every now and then. (This can still be changed)

Usagi obviously has to be here because it's not Leosagi without him. Hope you don't mind I use AWOSAN as a backbone since it's my biggest inspiration here

Now Usagi is a samurai from the teshu who has yet to swear loyalty to his Lord. Usagi fights by honor and helps those in need but is rather impulsive with his decision making resulting in a lot of money spent (aka going all out on some things)

So when a turtle comes up to him asking him if he wants to serve a God and be the first of followers his curiosity got the better of him and decided to see what this God had to offer and see if he will be his follower or not.

In the future Usagi joins the Pantheon but as like a messenger of the gods at first but slowly he earns his title as a God which is now the God of Honor, Justice and Blades.

Why Blades? Because he was a samurai and still considers himself to be as one even in his Godhood the Blades part is because once he finds which side he will be fighting for he will not stand by he will fight alongside those he things is right and will do so with vigor.

The Teshu crew has yet to be described here honestly since I love your characterization on them so I'm hoping for more ideas like this and maybe I can turn this idea into something (that is if I learn how to write)

So I'm looking at your fics and I got an idea about Leo being an actual god

Like imagine Leo was sent to the world of the mortals to learn and find some followers he had a limited time set before he gets home and his first one is Usagi.

Throughout their interactions Leo is starting to stray away from getting more followers and wants to hang around the mortals and maybe fall in love after learning more about it thanks to Mifune or someone else

(This idea is still in beta)

Honestly

I love it.

I had the villagers start making up different myths and legends about Leo and people really like them.

Honestly the rise family being gods is such a fun concept to play with. The show really gave us a whole pantheon to play with

Splinter is obviously the head of the pantheon

Raph is the god of protection, strength, and warriors.

Leo is the god of strategy and travel

Donnie is the god of knowledge and inventions/technology

Mikey a the god of food and the harvest,

April is the goddess of truth and families (she sees both sides of New York and is always the one to call the brothers out)

Cassandra is the goddess of war and violence

Casey is the god of peace and victory

Draxum is the god of magic and plants (he’s the one responsible for the mutations or transformations of man into beast)

These are just some loose ideas.

You can also give Leo and Donnie a sun and moon theme. Maybe make Raph the god of animals. Maybe Leo gear love and beauty as well tiring back to the Eros myth.

I would love to hear other peoples ideas on their godly abilities.

But yes the idea of Leo and his brothers sneaking down to earth and disguising themselves (ninja treachery) is so fun.

And of course this is how Leo meets Usagi. Usagi a samurai that can slay man and beasts a brutal warrior that is also kind and good.

Leo falls hard.

Maybe it ends with them separated as god and mortal stories often do. Or maybe Usagi takes up a position in the pantheon as some mythologies allow hero’s to do.

I love this idea. Give me more ideas to play with or tell me y’all’s thoughts. I’d love more of this.

This is very much a beta idea. The pantheon needs to be fleshed out and many other pieces but it would be very fun. Please do more with this.

[radiation-run]

Something that has really been bumming me out, is the number of posts where Ramon (and sometimes Helena and even Adriana & Sophia) is depicted as someone spouting visceral homophobia and hatred— without any canonical proof so far—and then tying it to him being Mexican/Latino.

I know maybe the writers didn’t know for absolute sure back in 2x18, when we first met Ramon & Helena, after Shannon’s funeral, that Eddie would be queer; but by 3x15 Eddie Begins, I’m sure they [writers] had an idea of where things would be headed.

When creating a character’s backstory, I think the idea of whether-or-not their father is a massive homophobe, is definitely an important detail. If the creators and writers wanted that for Eddie, I think they would’ve dropped some big hints for us by now.

I’m Latina, I know about machismo culture; Eddie does not show the signs of a closeted queer Latino man who grew up in the environment so many people have been theorizing(?) he grew up in.

Eddie:

loves and respects women (Eddie ‘women are friend-shaped’ Diaz !!!)

continuously tells his son it’s ok to talk about feelings/emotions (both Eddie and Christopher even attend therapy; Eddie is also a big hugger and always initiates hugs/physical contact)

is very independent/does not rely on women to do things for him (I know this is also ties in to military life)

does not start or escalate arguments (he actually tends to apologize or give his classic ‘✋🤚 Eddie Hands’ as a way to de-escalate/avoid conflict)

Does that mean Eddie never acted in any machista way? No, absolutely not! There very-well could’ve been a time where he reflected on his behavior and made a conscious effort to change, and worked hard to unlearn that behavior/mindset (especially after finding out he was going to be a father!) But, realistically speaking, based off of what we’ve seen, I don’t think that’s the case.

We’ll definitely see in the coming episodes, but until it is made canon, I refrain from taking Eddie’s queer repression as a sign that Ramon was aggressively(???) homophobic. I do think for sure, that Ramon made more passive(???) homophobic comments. Which brings in my theory:

I think Ramon could’ve possibly seen (from afar) Eddie and another boy shoulder-bumping & making heart eyes. Whether-on-not, he brought that up with Eddie later on, I’m not sure, but I think that would’ve been Ramon’s “““wake-up call””” that he needs to make it clear(er) to his son that being gay is not an option (especially since Eddie is the only son—and possibly the oldest child.)

I can definitely see Ramon telling Eddie that he needs to “man up,” get married (to a woman) & be the provider for his family, and of course the famous “brush it off, keep moving forward.”

I also think Ramon would’ve kept this all from Helena, because that makes it easier to avoid acknowledging that your son might be gay.

We’ve seen that Helena’s thing is always about keeping the family close together (being around enough that Shannon was “familiar with the tone,” ; Suggesting Eddie & Christopher move in permanently, prior to moving to LA ; Asking Eddie to return to El Paso after Shannon’s funeral)

Sooo, if that’s all true, it’ll be interesting to see Helena’s reaction to Ramon, indirectly, being the reason Eddie distanced himself—and Christopher— from the family (joining the military, moving to LA) though Helena has definitely had her moments lmfao—“Don't drag him down with you, Eddie.”

Eddie has shown signs of someone who experienced childhood emotional abuse, and Ramon & Helena have definitely shown signs of having been emotionally abusive (whether they knew/meant it or not.) But I don’t think the Diaz household was some war-zone-esque level of toxicity and aggression like a lot of people are theorizing it was.

Oof! I don’t know if anyone read this monstrosity of a post, but it feels nice to let it all out 🥹💖

I would really love to hear people’s opinion on this!

[taki118]

Go Watch the Venture Brothers

So just heard the complete and utter Bullshit news that Adult Swim has cancelled one of (if not the best shows) they have the Venture Bros. This series is one of those shows that for WHATEVER reason never got to the level of fandom Rick and Morty has even though they’ve been at the genre parody game longer and in my opinion better. 

The series is about Rusty Venture former boy adventurer and failing super scientist who in an attempt to keep his head above water in debt goes around with his two boys Hank and Dean, and bodyguard Brock on misadventues while various legal archnemisis go after him, such as the Monarch. 

So if you never watched or never heard of this 7 season series let me give you a break down on why you should, 

1) Art Style & Animation

Venture bros is one of those rare Adult aimed animated series that that really truly tries to utilize their medium to the best of their abilities. Season 1 had like such a small budget and corners had to be cut so it can be a little hard to watch at times. 

But with each passing season they get a little better, a little more fluid, go just a little harder and it truly feels rewarding to watch. Like seeing an artist you follow online improve over the years. Like they COULD have stayed with the choppy and stiff animation from season 1 it fit right in with its fellow adult animated shows but it didn’t. They strove for quality to have something that matched the story they were telling.

2) The Writing 

Venture Bros has some of the tightest and consistently great writing of ANY serialized show I’ve seen, adult, animated or other wise. Wanna know why? Cause it’s all done by TWO people (save for like one ep each season where one other person is allowed to touch their baby). Yeah TWO people and they work their asses off every season to interject, humor, refrences, parody, plot and character development in equal measure. 

3) Character Development

Um yes in case you were wondering that’s right an adult animated show has CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT  that holds as the series goes on. Not to give spoilers but characters will go through changes in alignment, relationships will develop and change, some characters will go through negative arcs where they are straight up unbareable for a season before coming out the other side even better than they were before. There is no end of epsiode or even end of season reset. Characters, settings, and dynamics all change over the course of the show and it feels just so god damn good.

4) Story Development 

Just like the characters the story of the Venture Bros grows and changes each season. Things that are set up even as early as season one are paid off as the series goes on. Like not to be that bitch but you know how RIck and Morty teases an overarching plot ALL THE TIME but like will often just spit in the face of fans hoping for more than like one episode a season addressing it? Yeahhhhhhh that doesnt happen here, fans are consistently rewarded for putting the time in to rewatch and really think about what happened in the series. Characters that are seen in the background or are just referenced by other characters will be brought in to be recurring characters, things that start off as a small detail or gag will be given larger relevance and each time they do this you get that “OH I remember that from last season! So thats what it was!” The writers WANT you to rewatch, they WANT you to analyze and they WANT you to theorize, and they give you a show that gives back the time you put in.

5) Parody & Reference 

This series does a great thing with parody. They make real characters  who are just as enjoyable as the characters they parody, they make story lines that both poke fun at the absurdity of the media but shows the writers love for it. So often parody and references are just used to mock the thing but with Venture Bros you feel the love and care so when you know the thing being parodied you can laugh but feel good about laughing cause they are never laughing at a thing maybe you cared for in your youth but rather laughing with it.

And it’s never just one thing. When they parody a thing its often layered with other things to make it even more unique. Scooby-Doo is overlayed with famous criminals, Laura Croft is mixed Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman, GI Joe is given the look of the Village People and so on. They never go for the easy joke or reference. Hell theres an episode that starts with them reciting the lyrics to David Bowies Space Oddity for really no reason other than they could. They weave these things in naturally with their setting and characters so nothing feels out of place. Like if you dont catch a reference or parody you dont feel like “I think this isa reference to something?” like a LOT of things do not just adult animated shows. You arent taken out of the moment cause it all feels so natural. 

6) The Characters 

God damn these characters, I could go on for hours about these characters. From main to one off these are some of the most likeable characters you can find. I mean it when I say I can’t think of a single character I wish they had cut cause they are all so well created. Even the ones I hate i have fun hating cause they were made to be that way. I’ll be good though I’ll only talk about my absolute top faves.

- The Monarchs

You ever sit and wish villain couples could have functional  healthy relationships? Well look no further than Malcom Fitzcarraldo aka The Monarch and Dr. Shelia Girlfriend (yes that is her last name). The Monarch is a high strung impulsive saturday morning cartoon villain whos tendency to over react is only matched by his unspecified hatred of Dr. Venture. And Dr. G is his nonsense partner in crime who will cut a bitch if they don’t play by their admittedly weird rules. Both characters are great on their own but are better together. Though that doesnt mean they always get along. Like a real couple they have their ups and downs they fight, break up, make-up and grow stronger in their relationship with each season. 

- Shore Leave

Ok ok so I want you to imagine James Bond, mixed with GI Joe simmering in a cocktail of the most flamboyant gay men you have ever seen and you have one of my favorite gay characters/characters in general. Shore Leave is a member of OSI (the shows SHEILD/GI Joe parody organization) he’s loud, brash, flippant, sassy and highly competent at his job loving every second of getting to beat bad guys down within an inch of their life. I love seeing him play off the stoic Brock and the two have this great brotherly dynamic that’s never called into question. He also gets to have a very cute romance with Al the Alchemist (who is also great). I could talk about this man all day.

- Dr. Rusty Venture

They did such a good job with this man. He’s a self serving, sexist, perverted, whinny, self important asshole and yet you feel pity and genuine sympathy for him and want him to succeed. You can see how Dr. V was given a raw deal by his father who seemed to care more about his adventures than his sons well being and how this molded him into the bitter man he is today, but on the flip side you can see where he chose to use that as a crutch for his worst behaviors and impulses. Seeing him slowly grow and change and be an actual good father to his boys while all the while still be a giant dick is actually really great. 

- Dr. Byron Orpheus 

Ahhhhh Dr. Orpheus part Dr. Strange Parody part busybody stay at home dad, he’s just such a delight. Dr. Orpheus is a divorcee, with an unfulfilling job of maintaining order to the cosmos (which isnt as hard as one might think), and uses his magical ablities in ways most of us would (ie menial tasks and home chores). Overly dramatic and affectionate Dr. O is a delight whenever he appears, but he’s at his best around his daughter and old friends The Order of the Triad. 

Again I can go on but all these characters ranging from main to recurring are crafted with the utmost care for you to want to see them succeed or fail, to see them again even if you know it’ll never happen, and want them to cross paths with other characters. 

The Venture Bros is one of those series that I will ALWAYS recommend even to the pickiest of humor tastes. But if you don’t believe its as good as I said or don’t think the concept is to your tastes I’ll recommend a few eps that I think best show off the base idea of the series without giving much away. In terms of plot and spoilers, though somethings wont make a lot of sense. 

- S1 ep10 "Tag Sale – You're It!" - Dr. V is having a yard sale so of course all manner of costumed weirdos show up.  - S2 ep5 "Twenty Years to Midnight" - basically a fetch quest around the world to save the planet with daddy issues - S3 ep2 "The Doctor Is Sin" - Again daddy issues but with one of the best recurring characters and a great showcase of the series deeper emotional plots - S4 ep6 "Self-Medication" - Really embraces the parody as Rusty goes to a former boy adventurer support group.  Anyway the show is 7 seasons with 80 episodes, please go watch it. I will never forgive @adultswim​ for cancelling what was to be their final season. And in closing GO TEAM VENTURE!

[heyyyharry]

Deep End - Chapter 6: Andersen’s Fairy Tales

…in which Harry teaches Ezi how to read.

Word count: 4k

AU: famous!harry, siren!mc, adult modern retelling of the little mermaid? lol, fake dating, enemies to lovers.

WARNING: MATURE THEMES

All chapters / Synopsis / Moodboard / Playlist

Wattpad link

A/N: please please let me know what you think. I can't write without motivation 😭

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When Harry finally decided to answer his mother’s call, he had prepared himself for some verbal ass-whooping. He was twenty-four years old, a celebrity and a millionaire, yet still getting scolded by his mother on a daily basis. Life was good.

“Is your date okay?” The first thing his mother said to him was this. At first, Harry thought he’d misheard it. But then she repeated the question in a more urgent and concerning tone. “Harry, is Ezili okay?”

His mother had never remembered the name of any girl he’d brought home. His mother always had a lot to say about the way those girls had dressed, talked, and carried themselves. Had Ezi charmed his mother with her siren magic?

Harry shuddered at the thought. “Y-Yeah...why?”

“Dawson told me you and Bax got into a fight at the manor.”

Harry smacked his forehead. Fucking Dawson. “How did Dawson know?”

“He found Bax lying on the floor.”

Although Harry hated to recall that night because he couldn’t imagine how scared Ezi must have been, it was funny to think about how pathetic Bax must have looked when Dawson had found him. The mental image made Harry laugh. “See?” he told his mother. “It wasn’t a fight if it was one-sided. I beat him up.”

His mother exhaled sharply. Harry could imagine her with her eyes closed, shaking her head. “The only reason I will let you get away with fighting your cousin in my house is because I know what he was trying to do with Ezili. So I called to ask if she was okay.”

“She’s okay. Don’t worry. I think she also scared him.”

“She’s a woman. Any strong woman would’ve been terrified in that situation,” said Harry’s mum. “I feel bad for having let that happen. I shouldn’t have invited him.”

“It’s not your fault, Mum. He’s always been scum.”

There was a pause, and Harry knew exactly what his mother was going to say. “Bax’s parents have always hated us. They envy your father. I think they’re trying to sabotage our wine business. Maybe if you’d change your mind--”

“Mum, we’ve talked about this,” Harry sighed. “I love my career. I can’t...I’m not a businessman like Dad. Isn’t Dawson doing a good job managing our family business already?”

“He is. But I know your father would’ve wanted it to be you.” When Harry stayed quiet, his mother knew it was a sign that this topic shouldn’t be continued, so she switched to another. “You should invite Ezili to lunch at the manor.”

“Mum, that wouldn’t be necessary.”

“Nonsense! Her first time in our house and she got absolutely traumatised. I’ll make up for it. I’ll send you an invitation in the afternoon.”

“Mum, there’s no need for an in--”

But his Mum already hung up on him.

Sighing, Harry sunk back into his chair. A staff member knocked on the door and informed him that he would have to return to the set in fifteen minutes. He told them he got it and intended to call his mum again and try to talk her out of the lunch thing with Ezi. That was when he got another call.

“Don’t tell me someone’s injured. It’s only been an hour.”

“Worse!” Niall screamed. “Dawson kidnapped the girl!”

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Ezili didn’t know if the bookstore was small or Harry’s house was just too big, but she liked the cosiness of it in contrast to what she’d always been used to. There were bookshelves climbing all the way up to the ceiling. The walls were covered with hundreds of books of all sizes, and there were dozens of piles on the floor in the corners as well. But seeing that most of the furniture was covered in dust, Ezili guessed they didn’t often have visitors.

She wondered why nobody wanted to come into this fascinating place. She loved books even though she couldn’t read or write. She’d found a few books in her room and some of them had pictures, but she could only guess what the stories were about. So she wanted to read, but it would be something her mother would never approve of. If she learned to read, she’d become a laughing stock for her kind for sure.

Entering the bookstore, Ezili and Dawson were greeted by an old lady with crazy chestnut hair that looked like she was wearing a fluffy dog on her head. Her eyes were huge behind those thick round glasses that gave her a psychotic kind of look that absolutely terrified Ezili.

“Hello, love birds,” she said with an ear-to-ear grin. Ezili could not take her eyes off the shiny wires attached to this lady’s teeth. They sparkled every time she opened her mouth. This woman must be rich if she wore silver on her teeth.

“Oh, we’re not birds,” Ezili said as she pulled Chilli tighter to her chest.

The crazy lady hugged her stomach and burst out laughing. “She’s a funny girl,” she told Dawson, pointing to Ezili, then her face turned serious. “But no cats allowed.”

“She’s with me. Her name is Chilli and she’s very nice--”

“She can stay here while you pick your books.” Before Ezili could protest, the lady took the black cat and put it on the counter. “So what are you looking for?”

“Thank you. We’ll just have a look around,” Dawson said with a tight smile and pulled Ezili with him. They turned into one of the aisles and heard the lady telling them she’d be here if they needed help. What kind of help would you need in a bookstore? It wasn’t like books would attack you.

“The Book of Wisdom,” Dawson said as he took out one colourful book from a higher shelf. Ezili peered over his arm as he scrutinised the front cover. He smelled like coconut and summer, which reminded her of those tropical islands she’d visited with her mother. And the fact that he was a lot taller than her made her want to bury her face into his chest to get soaked in that homely smell. But then she remembered what Harry had taught her about consent. Realising her chest was touching his arm, she stepped back and felt him relax a bit more. She hoped he didn’t think she was sexually hairdressing him. She had no idea why they called it hairdressing, and she kept forgetting to ask Harry.

“Hey, why do they call it hairdre--”

“Lesson 1: Be polite.”

Ezili jumped and hid behind Dawson’s back, her heart pounding violently. “Did the book just..talk?”

“Yeah, it’s a talking book for children,” Dawson chuckled. “I like your sense of humour.”

He flipped to a new page and the book talked again, “Remember, kids, if you accidentally raise your voice with someone, always apologise to them. It’s not nice to yell at other people.”

Ezili couldn’t decide if she was in awe or creeped out by the talking book. Maybe a little bit of both. But then her eyes zeroed in on a picture of a beautiful siren on one of the covers. She passed Dawson to try and was trying to reach for the book when his hand landed on her shoulder, and she looked up to see him grab the book without effort and hand it to her with a smile.

“You like this? It’s the new edition of Andersen’s Fairy Tale.”

“The Little Mermaid!”

“Yes.” Dawson’s eyes squinted behind his glasses. “You’ve never read Andersen’s Fairy Tales?”

“I have,” Ezili lied, hugging the book to her chest. “I want this book.”

“Great. I’ll buy it for you. As a gift.”

Harry had told Ezili that humans couldn’t just take the things they found because they would get arrested, and apparently, they couldn’t fight and kill each other for things either. It didn’t sound fair and was kind of stupid. Why were humans so dependent on these stupid papers they called money? Ezili couldn’t understand how their inferior brains worked sometimes.

“Hey, look,” Dawson said, holding up his phone that was buzzing in his hand. “Harry’s calling.”

Ezili couldn’t care less about Harry now. She let Dawson speak to him while she flipped through the book to look at pictures. But...why was there a picture of the prince and another girl? Didn’t he marry Ariel? She tried to look for the ones that revealed the new ending, which was apparently different from what she’d seen on the telly, but the rest of the chapter was just text and no pictures. She hated this. She wished she could read.

“Yeah, she’s here with me. The bookstore is just a few blocks near your house…” Dawson finished the call with Harry and turned back to Ezili. “He’s coming to pick you up.”

She found it strange that Harry would speak about Dawson with such hatred, like the way Koa would speak about Ezili, while Dawson had always been so nice about Harry. She couldn’t recall him saying anything bad about Harry when in fact, she could go on and on for days about Harry’s bad qualities. And she’d only known him for a week!

“Why doesn’t Harry like you?”

The question seemed to have caught Dawson by surprise, but he was quick to put on a smile.

“I don’t know. Maybe because I’m helping his mum run the business his father left for him. But he was the one who didn’t want it. He wanted to become a singer.”

“Harry’s mother doesn’t want him to be a singer?”

“No.”

Ezili closed the book and gave an understanding nod. “My mother never lets me do things I like, either. She never thinks I’m good enough because I’m not like her.”

“I’m sure your mother loves you,” Dawson said. Ezili liked the twinkle in his eyes and tenderness in his voice when he reassured her. Maybe he had a special gift that only sirens had. The gift to charm anybody they wanted. “Every mother has their own burdens and loves us in a different way.”

“But...if they love us, should they want us to be happy?”

Ezili didn’t know where that had come from. For the last twenty years of her life, she had never once thought of this. Why now? Why now that she decided that she could have been happier if her mother hadn’t been the way she was? But sirens were all supposed to be the way her mother was. Cold and dangerous like the ocean itself. So did it mean...did it mean her mother and sister were right? That she was too weak and emotional to become Queen?

“Ezi!”

The sound of her name pulled her out of her own head. She snapped her head up to find Harry padding toward her. He looked just like that night when he’d scolded her for biting his cousin. She hated this Harry.

“Let’s go home,” he told her coldly.

Before she could reply, he took her wrist and pulled her with him. The book fell to her feet and she was too appalled to even pick it up. She was about to remind Harry that Dawson was standing right there, but then she realised Harry had intentionally ignored his cousin.

“Ezili, your book!”

Harry and Ezi stopped before they got into the car parked out front. Dawson handed her the book and beamed. “I already paid for it.”

“Thank you.”

“Very nice. Get in, Ezi.”

Dawson seemed slightly annoyed by Harry’s attitude, but he didn’t act on it. Instead, he gave Ezili another gentle smile and told her he’d see her another time. Then, he went back inside the bookstore.

Ezili wished she could have stayed with him.

“Rescue mission accomplished!” said an energetic voice as Ezili got into the back of the car. A stranger she had never seen before peered around the passenger seat and smiled at her before he started speaking in a funny accent, “You’re welcome, by the way. The name’s Niall.”

Chilli was sitting on Niall’s lap, licking her own paw, which showed that she was comfortable around Niall, and Niall wasn’t an enemy. To human Ezili, of course. All humans were enemies to sirens.

“I’m Ezili,” Ezili said, then, she recognised the funny accent. “You’re Niall...Horan?”

“You know me?”

Ezili could feel her grin stretch from ear to ear. “I saw you on TikTok! You’re so funny.”

“Look, H, a fan!” Niall exclaimed as he shook Harry’s shoulder, but Harry didn’t react as he manoeuvred the car back onto the road. “I like her already.” Niall laughed. “I’m Harry’s best friend. Are you following my TikTok?”

“Yeah. I’ve watched every single one.”

“Good, good, good,” Niall said, nodding slowly. He turned to the front and back to Ezili immediately. “Also, I’m sorry about what happened to you. The accident must have been awful.”

“What?”

“Niall,” Harry growled. “Seatbelt.”

Niall flinched. “Sorry.”

Frowning, Ezili hugged her new book and sunk into her seat. She hated this Harry. He reminded her of a whale with a toothache, and even with that image in mind, she still couldn’t laugh. That was how angry she was with him. Yes, she was angry with him being angry with her. And for pulling her out of that beautiful bookstore. For making her drop her book. For holding her hostage like a prisoner. For being rude to Dawson. She hated him. She hated Harry Styles.

So when they’d arrived home and he told her to go inside and hang with Niall, she had to chase after him and let him know how much she hated him.

“Harry Styles!” She called when they reached the white stairs leading to the enormous courtyard where he’d parked his car. “Why are you upset? You have no right to be mad at me after you lied to me.”

Harry stopped halfway down the stairs; it seemed like Ezili’s words had finally hit him. He slowly spun around with a stunned expression as if she’d accused him of manslaughtering. “I didn’t lie to you,” he said, his jaw tight. “I told you to stay in your room. You were grounded.”

“You didn’t tell me that you’d leave me with your assistant and Niall!”

“But I didn’t lie to you.”

“Telling half-truths is telling lies.”

Harry held Ezili’s gaze for a long moment before he started ascending the stairs. She stiffened as he stopped right in front of her, leaned in, and stared.

“Oh, so you’re so honest, aren’t you?” he asked in a mocking tone. “You’ve never lied to me?”

“Never,” she said confidently.

Well, that was also a lie. But since when had Ezili felt bad for lying? She’d eaten men like him. Why did his presence now make her nervous?

She hated that the more she stayed human the more human she became. That thought terrified her even more than the possibility of getting caught and killed in this foreign land.

“I’ve never lied in my entire life,” she added, making Harry's eyes grow wide.

He said nothing, and when he turned to leave, she hurriedly followed him down the stairs. “Speechless by my honesty?” she asked.

“Speechless by the lies that come out of your mouth,” he said. “Is your name even Ezi?”

“No, it’s Ezili.”

Harry let out a scoff but he didn’t stop, so Ezili grabbed him by the arm and spun him around. Hard.

“Shit! How are you so strong?” he cried out, facing her again.

“Apologise.”

“What?”

Ezili folded her arms across her chest and sharpened her gaze. “Apologise right now.”

“For what?”

“For yelling at me.”

“And why should I apologise for yelling at you?”

Ezili bit her lip. The voice inside her head told her to push him down the stairs. She could just say it was an accident, and no one could prove that she’d done it. However, she needed him alive. Sucking in a breath, she said, “Because that’s what decent people do. A talking book told me that.”

“You mean those children's books you found in the bookstore,” Harry taunted, giving her a despiteful smirk.

She scowled at him even harder. “Apologise.”

“Fine,” he breathed. “I apologise for yelling at you. Now you apologise for stealing my cat.”

“I tried to save Chilli. You see, your assistant said something about the Master of the House being dead. I thought you were dead. But she was only talking about a show--”

“Yeah, famous Netflix show. It’s good. But that’s still no excuse for taking my cat.”

“Fine.” Ezili glared at him. “I’m sorry for stealing your cat.”

“And for getting into Dawson’s car.”

“And for getting into Dawson’s car.”

“And for leaving with him and liking him.”

“And for—What is your problem with Dawson?”

Instead of answering the question, Harry pulled out his phone, looked at it, and then told Ezili, “Go inside. We’ll continue this talk when I get back.”

He was just about to run when she pulled him back by his sleeve. He gave her a ‘what do you want?’ kind of look as she stammered, “When...when you get back…”

“Yeah?” He stressed out the word, an eyebrow arched impatiently.

“Can you teach me how to read?”

“What?”

“Teach me to read. Are you deaf?”

“You can’t read?”

When Ezili shook her head, Harry’s frown transformed into a smile. “That explains a lot.”

She smacked him on the arm and he gasped and leapt down two steps.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing! Why are you so aggressive?” Harry winced and backed away from her. “We’ll talk about this later. Now go inside and film a TikTok with Niall or something. I’m late for a photoshoot.”

Ezili opened her mouth to ask him what time he’d be home, but Harry had already run back to his car.

.

.

.

Harry got home at around 10 PM. He’d had a rough day. His manager had been furious because he had run out on a magazine photoshoot without saying a word to anyone. In his defence, he’d been in a rush, and couldn’t figure out an excuse to cover up for the fact that he’d almost let a mythical creature get loose. He shouldn’t have been so careless and left her with his assistant and Niall. That was his fault. Also, he could never think straight when he was angry. He thought about the look Ezili had given him when he’d pulled her out of the bookstore. The look Dawson had given him. Fucking Dawson. If it wasn’t for him, Harry wouldn’t have had to be mean to Ezi.

“Hey.”

“Jesus!” Harry shouted when the light switched on and he saw Ezili sitting on the floor in the middle of the living room. “Wha--Why are you on the floor? Get up.”

“This is Chilli’s favourite spot so I thought I might try to see how comfortable it is. Pretty uncomfortable, I must say.”

Harry rolled his eyes and offered Ezi a hand to help her get to her feet. “Why are you still awake?”

She pulled away from him and rushed over to the table to grab the book Dawson had given her. She shoved it at him. “You promised to teach me to read. This is a collection of fairy tales. Andersen’s Fairy Tales. I noticed that one of the details from The Little Mermaid story was different from the film, so I want to know how the story actually ends in the book.”

Harry sighed as he took the book and looked at the cover. When he glanced up, Ezi was giving him these big puppy dog’s eyes with her hands clasped together in front of her chest. “It’s late,” he said tiredly.

She shook her head. “You promised!”

“I can just tell you the ending.”

“No, I want to read!”

“Fine, fine.” He put his hands up, left palm out, the other holding the book. “I guess there’s still time to teach you the alphabet then we’ll call it a day.”

Harry could have sworn he had never seen anyone as excited about learning as Ezi was, which was quite amusing, he must admit. So they sat on the couch as he taught her the alphabet and how to put letters into words. She was a fast learner, so it didn’t take long for her to memorise everything.

“It’s been three hours and I still can’t read,” Ezili whined as she hit him with a pillow.

Shocked, Harry blinked at her. “That’s not how learning works. You need time.”

“You said my brain was more developed!”

“Yeah, but still!”

Scowling, Ezi kicked Harry’s feet. “You’re the worst teacher ever. I’ll never get to know how it ends.”

“Okay, Miss Drama Queen,” Harry scoffed. “How about I read you the story now, and when you can read on your own, you can practice by rereading it?”

Ezi thought for a moment, then the line between her brows eased, and she nodded once. “But you must teach me everyday until I can read.”

“Fine,” Harry breathed as he opened the book. His body stiffened when Ezi suddenly leaned on him like he was a pillow, her cheek against his arm, and he could feel every beat of her heart.

“Go on,” she urged him, giving him a nudge.

He cleared his throat and opened the book, trying to distract his naughty mind with the innocent words of a fairy tale.

Far out in the ocean, where the water is as blue as the prettiest cornflower, and as clear as crystal, it is very, very deep; so deep, indeed, that no cable could fathom it: many church steeples, piled one upon another, would not reach from the ground beneath to the surface of the water above. There dwell the Sea King and his subjects. We must not imagine that there is nothing at the bottom of the sea but bare yellow sand. No, indeed; the most singular flowers and plants grow there; the leaves and stems of which are so pliant, that the slightest agitation of the water causes them to stir as if they had life. Fishes, both large and small, glide between the branches, as birds fly among the trees here upon land. In the deepest spot of all, stands the castle of the Sea King. Its walls are built of coral, and the long, gothic windows are of the clearest amber. The roof is formed of shells, that open and close as the water flows over them. Their appearance is very beautiful, for in each lies a glittering pearl, which would be fit for the diadem of a queen...

By the time they’d finished one-third of the story, Ezi had already fallen asleep with her head on Harry’s shoulder. Harry wished he’d read this to her in bed so he wouldn’t have to carry her upstairs now. She was small and slender, but he’d had a bad day, so even the littlest inconvenience could bring down his mood. Cursing under his breath, he picked her up and carried her to the stairs as she curled against his chest like a little cat.

When her eyelids fluttered, he thought she was going to jolt awake, but then her brows knitted, and she murmured, “Mother, please...give me more time. I will bring you the heart…the heart...”

He chuckled and put her down on the bed.

[nnightskiess]

‧₊° 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐱 𝐬𝐥𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧!𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

‧₊° 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: 𝐲/𝐧, 𝐚 𝐬𝐥𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧, 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐣𝐨𝐢𝐧 𝐝𝐮𝐦𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐝𝐨𝐫𝐞'𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐲...

ᴘᴀʀᴛ ᴛᴡᴏ

*.·:·.☽✧    ✦    ✧☾.·:·.*

“I’m going back, you guys.” 

Her Slytherin friends raised their eyebrows.

“I’ve gotta study.” She quickly explained.

Pansy let out a snort and took a sip of her butterbeer. Of course Pansy would be able to see through her, but Y/N thanked her silently for not speaking up about it when their eyes met. If only Pansy knew the real truth behind her lie. 

“Have fun.” She sang out teasingly, guessing Y/N was off to sneak around with someone she had a crush on.

Y/N’s feet dragged through the snow as she walked to the secluded part of Hogsmeade, to the Hog’s Head Inn. She crossed her gloved fingers, hoping she was on time and that they would actually let her in and let her listen to what Harry Potter had to say. Y/N didn’t fit the stereotypical Slytherin mould, but no matter how hard she tried to prove that, she seemed to always be considered like a bad guy. Sure, her choice of friends obviously didn’t help her case, but still, didn’t she deserve to not be judged because of that?

Y/N hoped this wasn’t just some way to make Harry believable after all that The Daily Prophet had said about him, or to share his stories to make him even more famous. But if Hermione Granger was there, then it must be serious. She didn’t know the girl personally but knew far too well how much the bushy haired girl detested Umbridge and her teaching as well— or the lack of her teaching, for that matter. 

So when Y/N heard Zacharias Smith being persuaded by one of his friends to go to the meeting, she knew she needed to be there, too. If it was bullshit, she’d be out of there in a second. If it wasn’t, she hoped they accepted whatever kind of help she could offer. So, deciding to give them the benefit of the doubt, she marched up to the front door of the Hog’s Head.

Y/N silently cursed to herself when all eyes suddenly focused on her. How could she have been so dumb? Of course she should’ve walked in long before the rest, now they would obviously not say another word, too afraid she was one of Umbridge’s spies.

Harry pursed his lips, stopping himself from continuing. Ron looked mad and Hermione seemed confused... intrigued... impressed? All of the fore-mentioned? Y/N couldn’t quite tell. 

“Bugger off, you!” Ron gave her a nasty look.

Y/N had been expecting this, but maybe not from Ronald Weasley.

When Ron noticed she didn’t make a move to leave and instead took off her green scarf and mittens, he stood up, his ears red from anger.

“Come on then, leave!”

Y/N tried to stay calm, not liking his approach, and held up her hands, taking a measured step closer.

“I’m not here to spy on you, trust me.”

He stood up, his fists balled up in rage, “I find it hard to believe a girl like you would just stop here to get a drink, on her own no less.”

“A girl like me?”

“Yes! Where are your bloody friends?” Everyone raised their eyebrows at Ron’s newfound hostility. No one knew, not even Y/N, but the hatred towards the girl was partially because her father had humiliated Arthur Weasley plenty of times at work.

“Ronald!” Hermione shook her head and pulled at his arm, trying to stop him. 

“No one sent me. I’m here because of the meeting.” She looked around the pub, saw the man bandaged up in rags, the weird bartender who was cleaning the filthy glasses with an even filthier rag and then looked back at Ron, “I wouldn’t go here voluntarily.” She let out a breathy chuckle but realised everyone was still on edge. She clenched her jaw at the many disgusted looks sent her way.

“What meeting? We’re just chatting with each other.” Harry tried to play dumb but Y/N immediately rolled her eyes. How pathetic. 

“I overheard some of you talk about it. You should really be more discreet, you know?”

Harry bit the inside of his cheek, cursing whoever had been so careless and also hating the feeling how he felt like she lectured him, as if he was some child. When no one said a word and when they kept looking at her in disgust, her anger rose.

“Do you think I would spy for the woman who ruined my mother’s career, who made me carve words into my hand for detention and who fails to teach us anything and ruins the school a bit more every week?” Her rambled confession caught everyone off guard. “I might be a Slytherin but no one knows me here so why is your first approach so hostile? You wouldn’t have treated me like this if I was sporting a yellow scarf instead of a green one. Would you, now?”

Hermione admired how she had so fiercely tried to prove her case and suddenly remembered that Y/N had bought one of her S.P.E.W. badges the year before. She had been one of the few who had and remembered being surprised then, too. It was weird, but Hermione believed the girl’s intentions were true.

“She’s right.” She spoke, “Besides, we need all the help we can get.” She gestured for the girl to sit down, who took a seat at the back, trying to ignore the many stares still sent her way. Meanwhile Hermione tried to ignore the glares sent her way.

A week later, while Y/N was sitting in the windowsill of the Hogwarts library, trying to study for Potions class, Hermione hesitantly approached her.

“Hi, there, um- excuse me,” The Gryffindor cleared her throat, making Y/N look up from her book. She leaned in closer after making sure they couldn’t be overheard, “The first meeting is this Thursday on the seventh floor. The door’s a hidden entrance opposite the tapestry of Barnabas the Barmy. Just think of the meeting and the door will appear.” Hermione rushed out in a whisper. 

Harry and Ron had both still been hesitant letting Y/N join, but after Hermione had scolded and lectured them about giving the girl a chance, they begrudgingly agreed. However, Hermione had to bring the news to Y/N. They still had their doubts about the Slytherin girl who was friends with the likes of Pansy Parkinson and Draco Malfoy.

Y/N smiled softly, “Thank you.” 

After a week of radio-silence, she had come to terms with the fact that they hadn’t been too keen on letting her join after all, so this was a pleasant surprise. 

“I don’t believe I’ve properly introduced myself— besides the awkward introduction at the pub.” 

Hermione smiled meekly.

“I’m Y/N.”

“Hermione.”

The two shook hands quickly before Hermione excused herself, “I should probably go again. It might raise questions if we hang out together.” 

Y/N furrowed her eyebrows. Because she was a Slytherin? Because she was supposed to be a mean girl who would never hang out with a mudblood like her? Though Hermione probably hadn’t meant it in a wrong way, it hurt Y/N more than she would like to admit.

“Do you need that?” Hermione pointed to the book discarded at Y/N’s feet. Y/N shook her head slowly. 

“Okay, then... let’s just pretend I came to borrow it from you. See you on Thursday.” 

With one last look over her shoulder, Hermione had disappeared again behind the many bookshelves.

Thursday night rolled around and Y/N was on her way to the seventh floor. It was a long walk from the dungeons, so she had left long before 9pm just to be on time. Two Ravenclaws who she had seen at the meeting, walked in front of but Y/N decided not to join them, they probably still hated her.

“Y/N!” 

Pansy’s loud voice echoed through the empty hallway, making the two Ravenclaws turn around. When they saw Y/N with Pansy, they immediately quickened their pace. She wasn’t sure if it was because they were scared of Pansy, or if they wanted to hurry and tell Harry Potter that Y/N was up to something, that they couldn’t trust her because she had been with Pansy Parkinson right before the first lesson. Contrary to popular belief, Y/N actually hadn’t told anyone and wasn’t planning on doing so either. 

“Sneaking off again?”

An arm wrapped around her shoulder and Pansy gave Y/N a playful nudge in the stomach. Y/N let out a laugh and pushed her off, 

“None of your business.”

Pansy gave her a look, the corners of her mouth lifted up into a smirk. “The dungeons are downstairs, you know? No need to slither your way through the seventh floor.”

“Look who’s talking!”

The raven-haired girl rolled her eyes, “I’m a prefect, remember? I’m allowed to roam the halls, even after curfew, and no one would be allowed to question a thing.” 

“I see you’ve been taking advantage of it.”

“And you wouldn’t?”

Y/N shrugged, “Maybe. I don’t know.”

“You didn’t seem to complain when I gave you ten points for doing my homework.” 

The two laughed, “Fine, okay. It’s useful. Though I still think I deserved 15 points for that. You know how much I hate History of Magic.”

“Then you should’ve just said no.” Pansy let go of her arm and stopped walking, “I’m going back. Have fun.” She smirked again and left Y/N.

The Slytherin received a few confused looks when she stepped into the Room of Requirements. No one had believed Y/N had been serious or that the Golden Trio had actually dared to give her a shot. Some students seemed less hostile around her but Y/N knew they were still being careful. So it came as no surprise to her when everyone had to pair together, which led to her standing alone, along with Neville Longbottom. 

The boy’s eyes widened in fear when he realised who he had to pair up with. He was already nervous enough, he wasn’t great at Defence Against the Dark Arts, and having to try and disarm Y/N lessened his shot at success even more. 

Harry noticed the boy’s panic, quickly realising Neville needed a friendly face in front of him so he could relax and try and do his best. He waved Ron over and then left to watch the others, without another look at Y/N who still stood alone, playing with her wand to feel less awkward. No one seemed to notice, and if they did, they probably didn’t even care. 

Hermione let out an irritated sigh when she realised what had happened and told the girl she was practicing with to join the Parvati twins. She made her way over to the Slytherin, still unsure how to approach her, but did so nonetheless. 

“You can pair up with me... if you want to, that is..” She quickly added the last part, unsure if Y/N hated mudbloods as much as her friends did, they seemed to hate Hermione’s guts because of it.

Y/N let out a relieved smile, which didn’t go unnoticed by Hermione, and followed her so they could have more space.

They practiced in silence for a few minutes, both girls impressed by the qualities of the other, before Y/N opened her mouth to talk.

“I feel like a freak show.” She let out a breathy but awkward chuckle, making Hermione stop her movements. Y/N felt all their eyes on her, even if her back was turned their way. Hermione smiled sympathetically, seeing everyone glance at the Slytherin girl every few seconds.

“Just ignore them.” Hermione immediately realised how cliché and stupid it had sounded and tried to better herself, “I-I mean- It’s a compliment really... They... they must keep staring at you because you’re obviously incredibly talented and they feel challenged by that.”

Y/N smiled softly at the rambled reply, “I doubt it’s because of that, but it’s a nice thought. Thanks, Granger.” She knew the girl was only trying to make her feel better. And she had, she was the only one who had tried to accept her, after all. Even if it felt off or if the rest of her friends were against it.

“I don’t know what they all told you, but I promise that I mean well.” Y/N cleared her throat. “I know my house and my choice of friends alarms some of you, but we don’t always see eye to eye on most things... I don’t care that you’re a mudblood, for example.” Hermione looked up, taken back. “If anything, it makes you special. I would like to know more about muggles but my father doesn’t want me to meddle with that world. I just think the unknown scares him.” She continued when Hermione was still searching for a proper reply. She was intrigued by everything Y/N was telling her. “There are more like me, you know? But they’re just too scared to show their true beliefs or to speak up. Some have done it though, but they’re seen as the odd ones out. They are being bullied every time they enter the common room, mostly by Draco.”

Hermione rolled her eyes— of course. Y/N took notice of her reaction and immediately felt the need to protect her friend. “He’s not that bad. I mean, I know he bullies you but... in reality, I think all of us are just pressured to be or think a certain way by our parents and the moulds the other students put us in. It’s not easy being good when everyone treats you like you’re the bad guy.” Y/N’s voice died down.

“That’s still not a reason to bully someone.” Hermione’s voice was soft.

“I know.”

“I’m guessing you were too scared to speak up, then?” She guessed, since it came as a surprise to everyone that Y/N had good intentions and was one of them.

Hermione’s harsh voice hurt Y/N more than she wanted to.

“I’m here, aren’t I?”

“But would you ever tell Pansy or Draco that?”

Y/N shook her head immediately, “No, of course not. I swore to never tell anyone about Dumbledore’s Army, everyone has sworn secrecy, right? Besides, they think I’m not serious when I say I don’t care about someone not being pureblood. They wave it away like I just made a sarcastic joke.”

Hermione looked down swiftly, realising she had lashed out for the wrong reasons.

“I’m sorry.”

Y/N waved it off with her hand, “It’s fine. I’m sure more people will attack me for it in the future. That’s if they dare to talk to me first... do I have a tail or something?” Y/N playfully looked behind her and wiped her bum, “Horns?” She combed through her hair. “They keep on looking!”

Hermione shook her head in amusement. “You look more than fine, there’s nothing wrong with your bum.” Her eyes widened immediately, her cheeks turned scarlet, “Or your hair!” She quickly added.

Y/N laughed heartedly, signalling for Hermione to stand tall again so they could continue practicing.

*.·:·.☽✧  

Y/N fumbled with the fake Galleon in her hand, waiting for the new date to appear. She was starting to enjoy the meetings of Dumbledore’s Army. Through the weeks, everyone had paired up with her at least once and they quickly realised she was no threat. She was finally at a point where they didn’t walk away from her. Instead, they now laughed at her jokes and smiled proudly when Y/N encouraged them. They still had to appear like strangers outside of the Room of Requirements. Y/N hated it. She had made new friends and wanted nothing more but to sit with them during lunch, or help them study. Hermione had done her best to make Y/N feel at home within the group, and Y/N couldn’t lie to herself— she had started to fancy the Gryffindor. Sure, she had found her very pretty before, when all she could do was sneak short glances at the girl during class, but she would have loved to sit in the library together, go to Hogsmeade and really get to know her. But that would raise too much questions, and she wasn’t sure if she could explain this one to Pansy, Draco or Blaise.

“That’s all, you guys. Have a nice Christmas break!” 

Everyone left the Room of Requirements in little groups, as Harry inspected the Marauder’s map, waiting for them to arrive in their common rooms before checking if the coast was clear for another group to leave. Y/N could’ve joined the Hufflepuffs to the dungeons but Harry had advised against it. Seeing Y/N with them would for sure raise questions with the other students who didn’t know of the existence of the Defence Against the Dark Arts class. He would never admit it out loud, but he too had warmed up to the Slytherin girl. She was skilled and could help out the others when he needed a hand. 

Hermione felt Y/N appear next to her, looked up and gave her a soft smile. They were waiting for the Hufflepuffs to arrive so that Y/N could go. 

“Um-” Y/N started, “Did you know Umbridge told her High Inquisitors to try and find out our plans?” 

This got Hermione’s attention. 

“I mean, I only assumed... That’s why she named them in the first place, right?” 

“Yeah, Draco, Pansy and the others talk about it all the time. How they want to catch you guys— especially Potter.” 

“Oh...” Hermione furrowed her eyebrows, realising that this might become a problem later on. Their luck would run out soon. “I’m sorry, it must be hard to sit there and lie to your friends.”

Y/N shrugged, “I knew what I signed up for when I joined.” She twirled her wand through her fingers, one of her habits, and hoped what she was going to say next wouldn’t be a wrong move, 

“I could tell you what their plans are? Inform you when they are up to something, maybe mislead them... and that kind of stuff...”

Hermione raised her eyebrows, shocked that Y/N had the guts to go that far, to betray the friends she’d had since first year. 

“I mean, that would be very useful but... Are you sure? If they ever find out-”

“I have to be careful around Pansy, she reads me like an open book, but I think I could get it out of Draco when he’s gloating about it again.”

“But when word gets out, you’ll be the only Slytherin, you’re the only one out of all of us who hangs out with them. They’ll know it was you.” 

“If we do nothing, we risk getting caught. Besides, it would finally rid all of the doubts the others might still have about me. You know they’ll point at me the moment Draco or the rest finds out about this. They’ll think I finally caved and told Umbridge.”

“It’s not worth it. You don’t have to prove anything, not to me at least. I know you’re not like that now.” Hermione started to feel bad. “Your friendships and relationships with everyone in your house, or with your parents, should not be put on the line for that.” Hermione had a feeling that Y/N’s father would most likely skin her alive if he ever found out.

“I insist.”

Hermione saw the persistent look in her eyes, knowing she was not going to let someone change her mind, not even Hermione. Y/N was after all a Slytherin, and if she wanted to go for something, she gave it her all until she reached her goal.

Harry called her name and waved with the Marauder’s map— it was her time to go.

“Alright, just... be careful about it. Please?”

One curt nod sent Hermione’s way and she left the Room of Requirements, leaving Hermione with a bad feeling in her gut.

*.·:·.☽✧ 

“You’ve got me really curious.” Pansy opened the drapes around her bed in a flash, startling Y/N. “You’ve been hooking up with this person for weeks now and you won’t even give me a single hint.”

Y/N shrugged. “I thought you liked riddles, go figure it out then.”

Pansy groaned in annoyance, falling back onto her bed as she stared at the ceiling.

“Can’t, got no time. Umbridge has us patrolling the seventh floor the whole night.”

Y/N froze immediately. Another meeting was about to start in an hour, they couldn’t be seen.

“Why?”

Pansy propped herself up on her elbows and looked at her friend, “To get Potter and his goons, of course?! Apparently this girl, Marietta Edgecombe, told Umbridge all about it.”

Y/N tried to mask her surprise and anger and realised she needed to do something quick to try and steer Pansy to a dead end.

“Are you sure it’s the seventh floor? I thought I heard gossips about it being near the Owlery, in one of the abandoned classrooms. No one goes there because Peeves roams the hallways.”

Pansy tilted her head, realising Y/N’s reply had been way too detailed. 

“Don’t tell me you have another romantic meeting in one of the broom closets tonight on the seventh floor.” Pansy examined the expression of her friend but continued talking, “Don’t worry, we’ll be looking for a hidden room. I reckon we won’t be checking any broom closets tonight.” She gave her a wink, but saw that Y/N still seemed on edge. 

“I need to go.”

“Go where?!” 

But Y/N had already left their dorm room and rushed out of the Slytherin common room, trying to reach Hermione. 

“Can you please get Hermione Granger? Or Harry Potter, or Dean or Parvati- really, anyone is fine!” Y/N needed to tell them or it was too late. But the Fat Lady pursed her lips and Y/N saw her eyes take a quick glance at her green Slytherin tie. She let out a huff and faced the other side.

“Please! It’s urgent!”

The Fat Lady started to sing to try and ignore her, but Y/N wasn’t going to give up so easily and started banging on the wall, hoping it would somehow be heard in the common room.

After half a minute of banging, the Fat Lady turned to her, annoyed. She was about to complain when a third-year Gryffindor student walked out. He looked taken back when he saw the girl stand there and was unsure of how to react. 

“Is Hermione Granger in there? Or any of her friends?”

He looked her up and down, trying to see if this was another attempt at pranking one of the Gryffindor students. However, he soon saw the honest desperation in her eyes and shook his head hesitantly.

“No, I saw them all leave a while ago. You just missed-”

Y/N bolted up the stairs, she needed to stop them. Part of her was hoping Umbridge wouldn’t be able to find the hidden room, but she knew better. The toad would just wait long enough until they all left eventually. Hell, if it were up to her, she would probably sit there for days if needed, just to get the satisfactory that she had caught them.

But when she rounded the corner to the hallway, she saw Harry and his friends being dragged away by Umbridge and her Inquisitors, Hermione included. Y/N saw Draco and Pansy and immediately ducked back around the corner, but the sudden movement had caught Hermione’s eye. When Y/N peeked her head around the corner to see where they were taking them, her eyes met those of Hermione. She shook her head in disappointment, which to Y/N, was much worse than if she had been raging with anger. Y/N realised what Hermione was thinking right now and wanted nothing but to round the corner and tell them she had been trying to warn them, not rat them out. Though she had always told them she was not like the rest, something in Y/N stopped her from stepping out into the hallway. The realisation of losing her friends and disappointing her parents suddenly weighed heavily on her.

The doubts Hermione had had in the beginning, the ones she had just as easily neglected after getting to know the real Y/N, suddenly hit her like a ton of bricks. This had been the bad feeling in her gut. Y/N had betrayed them after all, and Hermione had fallen right into her web of lies. What hurt even more than the tight hold Pansy Parkinson had on her shoulder and arm, was the realisation that she slowly started to develop feelings for the same girl who had now betrayed her.

*.·:·.☽✧    ✦    ✧☾.·:·.*

[chimtaesty]

Moonlit Destiny Part One

pairing: princess!reader x king!jin / 2.8k words

warnings: angst, violence, anxiety, strong language, trauma

plot: marrying a king of a far away country seemed to be your biggest problem, but gradually falling in love with a man who is deeply hurt and isn't able to control his rage turns out to be more troublesome.

A/N: hi! I'm really sorry that the first part of this series wasn't uploaded at the planned date. I had to replan and arrange thigs because my exams were delayed and moved and everything was a mess. I hope you enjoy this opener and you'll stay tuned for more of this series.

comment down below if you want to be added to the taglist!

masterlist / story masterlist / PROLOGUE

“His first wife, Eunbi, was a traitor....”

“W-What do you mean?” The information he’s giving you doesn’t seem to get processed. His wife betrayed him, causing him pain. “She tried to poison him, almost killing his youngest brother in the process. She aimed for his crown, she wanted to be the sole ruler. The emperor had her hung publicly” Your brain doesn’t work.

Your mouth opens to question Yonghee further, but in that very moment Seokjin walks towards you two, aiming for you. “I’m sorry for breaking up the conversation between you two, but i would like to talk to my fiance” He states with a small smile, making you question what Yonghee said a minute ago. How on earth was the man that stands in front of you able to hang his wife. To execute the woman he loved, or maybe he didn’t. It may have been easier to kill her for treason because he didn’t actually love her. Would he be able to execute you when you made a mistake? Would he ever be able to kill you?

“Y/N, I wanted to elaborate the cause of my anger towards you. I realised that it was unfair to be angry at you for mentioning my first wife without actually knowing what happened.” You don’t say anything while he sways on the heels of his feet. You know what happened, yet you let him explain to see things through his perspective.

“My first wife, Eunbi, was a wonderful woman. We loved each other truly and I would've given her everything. I made her queen because she desired to be my wife. I allowed her to learn whatever she wanted, because I loved her. She made me the happiest man alive. But she betrayed me, she used me, tried to kill me for her biggest desire. She wanted to be in my position, be king. She tried to kill me, but she poisoned my youngest brother, Jungkook, instead. It was an accident since the poisoned cup of wine was meant for me. My brother survived, barely, he still has problems with speaking. When it was revealed that she had poisoned my brother's drink she showed her real face.

She admitted that what I had given her wasn’t enough. She wanted to be the sole ruler of my kingdom and she was ready to do whatever it took to accomplish that. Although I loved her, dearly, I had to execute her. I would’ve forgiven her, I would've let her go because I loved her. My brother, Yoongi, took care of her execution. I couldn’t be present. I couldn’t watch the woman I loved being hung like a criminal.” he finishes with tears in his eyes.

His eyes are red and his cheeks pink. You can’t even imagine what he felt, the pain that must torture him every single day. “How many brothers do you have?” you don’t realise what leaves your mouth until it’s too late. A small chuckle leaves his plump lips. “That’s what busies your mind? How many brothers I have?” you chuckle as well. “I’m curious, I now know what happened to Eunbi and I understand that it must be unimaginably painful to execute someone you love but since you don’t want to talk about it too much, I won’t bring it up again. Thank you for telling me” you nudge his arm slightly “Now tell me how many brothers you have”

xxxxx

He has six brothers, Namjoon, the army commander of the south. He takes care of the safety in the kingdoms south. He’s very tall and likes to read, in his free time he likes to take care of the animals which live at the royal court. Yoongi, who takes care of the local prisons. He is excellent at getting people to talk, through torture, to your displeasure. He’s smaller than his brothers and likes to listen to concerts on his free evenings.

Hoseok is the army commander of the north. He shares his work with his brother, Namjoon, and takes care of the safety in the kingdom's north. He is a ray of sunshine. Seokjin said he was surprised when Hoseok asked to be a commander since he imagined him to become an artist like Taehyung, but he assured his brother of his professionalism. He likes to help Jimin with the local orphanages in his free time, remarkable.

Jimin is the third youngest of the bunch. He is a famous warrior, known as the white shadow. He fought in several great wars and always came back as the winner. Even though he’s a scary and very skilled warrior, he has a very sensible personality. He likes to help out at the local orphanages, showing the children how to defend themselves. A secret ,Seokjin pleaded with me to never ever talk about, is that Jimin likes to be read to. He often asks his older Brother, Namjoon, to read to him.

Taehyung is the second youngest, making him the second family's baby. He’s the only one who strayed from the genre of professions among the brothers. He decided to become an artist, painting the most beautiful paintings and writing the loveliest poems, having quite the clan of female admirers. He does know how to fight, though. Growing up with six brothers who like to train for future purposes made him learn how to fight as well. He might not be as skilled as Jimin or Jungkook, but he would survive in war.

Jungkook is the youngest of them all. He’s a warrior like Jimin, known as black shadow. He is the best fighter out of the seven, no one has ever succeeded in having him land on his back. He seems really scary, almost terrifying, said Seokjin. But he’s a nice boy, kind and cautious. He told Seokjin that he would like an older sister in law because Eunbi was younger than him, calling him Oppa, which he strongly disliked.

When he was poisoned, he lost almost all possibility to speak, he has trouble eating and dislikes having to talk to people. He’s embarrassed people would feel disgusted by his raspy and rough sounding voice.

His family sounds fun, complicated but fun.

xxxxx

The maids helped you put the traditional clothes on called “Hanbok”. “Ow!” you shout, startling the maids in the process. “We are deeply sorry, your majesty. We have to tighten this part a slight bit.” Moving in this big thing seems impossible as there’s so much fabric. “You’re almost done, your majesty.” you can’t believe that Seokjin wants you to wear such a hideous amount of clothing.

“You’re done, your majesty! The only thing you will have to put on is the head piece” the smaller girl in front of you instructs. She holds a big golden something in her hands. You’ve never seen something as astonishing and beautiful as this golden thing.

She places the headpiece on your head, securing it in your hair. It’s heavy, feels like they’ve placed a child on top of your head, yet you like it. “You look beautiful, your majesty” you smile at her “Thank you very-“Is she done yet?” An impatient voice wanders through the walls. “Yes, your majesty. Your fiancé is done being dressed” a maid informs him.

“Good, come outside, my dear. Let me have a look at you” he pushes. You’re not sure how you’re supposed to get up. There’s jewelry as heavy as a newborn on your head and ridiculous big clothing on your body. “I’ll try my best.” he chuckles.

The maid helps you up, you’re sure she’s trying to not laugh herself. If the women in his country wear this stuff without a problem?

“Wow, Y/N. You look stunning. Come here, my love” he opens his arms wide. You let go of the maid, focused on making your way over to him. The headpiece weighs down on your already exhausted neck. “Thank you, the headpiece is quite heavy though” your nose crunches up at your small complaint.

He stifles a laugh “That’s alright, you won’t have to wear it all the time. Such big jewelry should only be worn at special occasions” you nod your head, or at least you try to. “Y/N, could you do me a favor?” you hum “Of course” “Please take care of Jungkook, he needs someone to talk to. His brothers don’t seem fit for that job” you nod. “I’ll try”

xxxxx

So here you are, in front of his parents and his six brothers, well not all six. Two are missing. All of them are way taller than you imagined them to be. His mother is the smallest, smaller than you. And his father is a tad bit smaller than the boys behind him, yet he looks like a king. The posture and the way he introduces himself to you makes it obvious that he was king a while ago.

“My name is Y/N, it’s nice to meet you, your majesty” you bow lowly, as low as Yonghee had shown you. “Oh dear, you don’t have to bow to us. I’m not king anymore” you shake your head in disagreement. “I have to, you are Seokjin's family.” You try in their language.

Yonghee taught you the best he could during your months-long trip back to Seokjin’s land. “That’s very kind of you, Y/N. This is my wife Juhyun, and my name is Hyunsuk. I’m pleased to take you in as my daughter-in-law” you bow once again, making sure to bow to his mother once again. You catch her look, the hatred in her eyes.

His brothers introduce themselves as well before Seokjin snatches you away, taking you to his bedchambers. “She hates me” you sigh. “What are you talking about?” You sit yourself on the bed, trying to wiggle the big head piece out of your hair. “Your mother, she despises me and I can’t get this thing out of my hair” you cry out in frustration.

“Don’t think about her too much. She’s just cautious, after what happened with Eunbi. Let me help you” he tries to calm you. “But you didn’t see her eyes. She would’ve stabbed me right then and there if she had the chance to” you sigh.

His big hand finds its way onto your cheek. “Y/N, stop. She won’t ever hurt you. As long as you’ll stay loyal to me, you won’t be in danger.” His words calm you, to some extent.The fact that he’s willing to protect you even though he’s not in love with you is nice, it feels very nice.

xxxxx

“Why do I have to meet her?” You sigh as a maid helps you into a lighter piece of clothing. “Because she wants to get to know her daughter-in-law. Just drink some tea, answer her questions and you’re good to go.” Your nose crunches up in displeasure. Meeting his mother for tea or rather for interrogation is the cherry on top. She might just kill you and call it an accident.

“You won’t have to stay too long, I want you to meet my youngest brothers. Jimin and Jungkook are coming home from war and Taehyung will present his newest paintings tonight. I want you to be on good terms with them.” You nod and squeeze his hand.

He rubs your palm “You’ll be fine”

Two very friendly guards escort you to the small pavilion on the other side of the palace.

“There you are, take a seat” his mother, Juhyun smiles at you. It’s a fake smile, you’re sure. “I prepared some green tea, it helps your metabolism. You should slim down a little, right” you blink in irritation.

It’s not even been two minutes and this woman is testing your patience. “You won’t want Seokjin to fall back on his concubines, right?” She smiles, once again making you puke deep inside. “Ah, yes.” You huff.

Why is she so keen on making you upset, god. “How old are you, child?” She asks after she pours you some tea. “I’m twenty one” she nods her head, her eyebrows twitching slightly “You’re quite young, dear. You’ll have to give birth to a lot of sons.” You nod your head. “I’ll try my best to reward Seokjin with sons”

She gives you a small smile “Of course you will” she mumbles, clear for your ears to hear. “So, how much do you know about our disappointment of a former queen?” your head shoots up. “Seokjin told me about her, tragic.” her eyebrows furrow and she places the cup of tea down. “He told you himself?” you nod, trying not to chuckle because of her obvious irritation. “He did, he wanted me to know what happened to her.” she hums, making you more uncomfortable than before.

“I’m really sorry about what happened. Having to lose someone a part of the family is horrible.” you place your cup down as well. “Oh don’t act like you care, Eunbi has always been and would have always been the wrong pick for my son. I’m quite glad she got herself killed. I would have hung her myself if my youngest son wouldn’t have survived.” she chuckles and you divert your gaze from the woman in front of you. The water lilies swim peacefully in the crystal clear water, wanting you to be a part of them. Having all the time in the world to relax and be left alone. You would like this woman to leave you alone.

“Child, did you hear me?” your eyes wander to her again. Of course you didn’t hear her. “Excuse me, I didn’t, I’m sorry” you sigh. This tea party is taking way too long, where are you, Seokjin? In your mind you plead for Seokjin to show up and snatch you away. “Great, you aren’t a good listener either. You know, when you want to be the queen of this land, you have to be good at listening to peopl-”Mother, excuse me”

Your eyes widen at the voice you waited so patiently to fill this pavilion. “I’m sorry that i have to break your conversation apart, but i would like to take my fiance with me” he smiles at his mother and you’re quick to get up. A quick bow and you almost drag Seokjin with you.

“Slow down, my love. You look as if you’re trying to escape something” he chuckles. He’s playing with you. Of course he knows that you wanted to escape from his mother as soon as possible. “Oh you don’t know, she’s horrible.” he frowns slightly as he takes your hand in his.

“I know, she didn’t treat Eunbi nice either. I’m sorry that she criticised you. Meeting her has to happen out of decency.” you nod and lower your head. “What did she say?” he asks.

His face looks concerned, your cheeks heat up. “Well, nothing serious” you mumble. He stops walking, pulling you towards him. You look up at him as his features grow angry “As my wife you have to be honest with me, weather i like what you have to tell me or not”

A small sigh leaves your lips as you flutter your eyelashes. “She told me to lose weight or you’ll leave me for one of your concubines.” “What else?” You can’t meet his eyes, you’re too embarrassed. “She doubted my ability to give birth to sons. She acted dismissive as i assured her that i’ll try my best to give birth to your sons.” now it is his turn to sigh.

His big hand finds its way to the back of your neck. “Listen to me, you aren’t too heavy in any way. You’re the right size, you match me perfectly. And you don’t have to worry about not being able to give birth to sons. I’m very much able to put perfect children in there” his hand rests on your stomach. “Don’t doubt me, Y/N” he breathes.

You feel hot, so damn hot you might melt. “I would never” you mumble. His lips are so close. Your eyes move from his lips to his eyes as he moves closer. And in a matter of seconds your lips meet his, igniting a firework in the pits of your stomach. They are so soft as your lips move against his, something you never felt.

“Emper-excuse me” a guard stumbles back around the corner as he sees what is happening. Seokjin pulls away, making you close your eyes and replaying the moment he kissed you. “What, I can't have a moment of peace in this palace.” he grasps your waist as the guard comes back around. “Prince Jimin and Prince Jungkook have arrived-”Good, tell them to come to the crown hall.” he bows his head once more. “That’s the issue, Emperor. Prince Jungkook is greatly injured. Prince Jimin brought him to the nobel healer.” Seokjin tenses up and you are quick to grasp his hand.

“He fights in my war and comes home half dead, this boy.” Seokjin squeezes your hand and sighs once more as he pulls you along.

“Let’s meet my brothers”

taglist: @teamtardis-notdead @little7bitchh

[dwellordream]

“...While on his travels Augustus would have continued to be preoccupied with the old issue of what would happen after his death. He had clearly demonstrated at the time of his departure that he could not manage without Marcus Agrippa, married at the time to Marcella, Octavia’s daughter. Agrippa now divorced her (her compensation was to be married to Iullus Antonius, the son of Antony and Fulvia), so as to be free in 21 to marry the widowed Julia. Plutarch says that this marriage came about through Octavia’s machinations and that she prevailed upon Augustus to accept the idea. It is not clear what her motives would have been.

If we are to believe Seneca we might see pure spite. He claimed that Octavia hated Livia after the death of Marcellus because the hopes of the imperial house passed now to Livia’s sons. This could well be no more than speculation, and Seneca does not even hint at any specific action by Octavia against her supposed rival. The whole story sounds typically Senecan in its denigration of dead individuals who are easy targets. Once again, we are told nothing about Livia’s reaction to the marriage. She might not have been able to object to the earlier marriage between Julia and Augustus’ nephew Marcellus, but in 21 the situation was different. Her older son, Tiberius, who was not yet married, had been passed over in favour of an outsider to the family. 

But whatever his sense of obligation to his wife, Augustus probably felt that he had little choice in the matter. Agrippa’s earlier reaction to having to take second place to Marcellus, a blood relative of Augustus, would have provided a good hint to Augustus of how his friend would have taken to playing second string to Tiberius. Agrippa was now a key figure in the governing of Rome. He was not a man to be provoked. If Livia had been entertaining hopes that this early stage of a preeminent role for either of her sons (and such a suggestion, while reasonable, is totally speculative), such hopes would have faded with the birth of two sons to Julia and Agrippa.

Gaius Caesar was born in 20 bc, and, as if to confirm the line, a second son, Lucius Caesar, arrived in 17. Augustus was delighted, and soon after Lucius’ birth signalled his ultimate intentions by adopting both boys. He thus might envisage himself as being ‘‘succeeded’’ by Agrippa, who would in turn be succeeded by either Gaius and Lucius, who were, in a sense, sons of both men. In late 16 bc Augustus set out on an extended trip to Gaul and Spain, where he established a number of veteran settlements. Livia may have accompanied him. Dio does report speculation that the emperor went away so as to be able to conduct his affair with Terentia, the wife of his close confidant Maecenas, in a place where it would not attract gossip. 

Even if the rumours were well founded, the implication need not necessarily follow that he had left Livia behind. Livia had a reputation as a femme complaisante, and Augustus may simply have wanted to get away from the prying eyes of the capital. Certainly at one stage Livia intervened with Augustus to argue for the grant of citizenship to a Gaul, and this trip provides the best context. Moreover, Seneca dates a famous incident to this trip, Livia’s plea on behalf of the accused Gaius Cornelius Cinna. It could well be that Seneca misdated the Cinna episode, but he at any rate clearly believed that Livia had been in Gaul with her husband at the relevant time.

…Agrippa lived to see the birth of two other children, his daughters Julia and Agrippina. The first (born about 19 bc) is the namesake of her mother, and, in the historical tradition, cut from the same cloth; the second was to be somewhat eclipsed in the same tradition by her own daughter and namesake, the mother of the last Julio-Claudian emperor, Nero. Agrippa thus became the natural father of four of Augustus’ grandchildren during his lifetime (a fifth would be born posthumously), and his stock rose higher with each event. He had served his princeps well, and could now take his final exit. In 13 he campaigned in the Balkans. At the end of the season he returned to Italy, where he fell ill, and in mid-March, 12 bc, he died. 

His body was brought to Rome, where it was given a magnificent burial, and the remains were deposited in the Mausoleum of Augustus, even though Agrippa had earlier booked himself another site in the Campus Martius. In the following year Octavia died. She is celebrated by the sources as a paragon of every human virtue, whose only possible failings had been the forgivable ones of excessive loyalty to an undeserving husband and excessive grief over the death of a possibly only marginally more deserving son. As noted earlier, we should be cautious about Seneca’s claim that Octavia nursed a hatred for Livia after the death of Marcellus. But there can be no doubt that her death was in a sense advantageous to Livia, for it removed one of the main contenders for the role of the premier woman in the state. Only Augustus’ daughter Julia might now lay claim to a precedence of sorts, but she in fact became an agent in furthering Livia’s ambitions, rather than an obstacle. Once her formal period of mourning was over, Julia would need another husband. Suetonius says that her father carefully considered several options, even from among the equestrians. 

Tiberius later claimed that Augustus pondered the idea of marrying her off to a political nonentity, someone noted for leading a retiring life and not involved in a political career. Among others he supposedly considered Gaius Proculeius, a close friend of the emperor and best known for the manner of his death rather than of his life: he committed suicide by what must have been a painful technique—swallowing gypsum. This drastic action was apparently not in response to the prospect of marriage to Julia but in despair over the unbearable pains in his stomach.

In 11 bc, the year of Octavia’s death, Augustus made his decision. He could hardly pass over one of Livia’s sons again. They were the only real choices, given the practical options open to him. Both were married, and Drusus’ wife was the daughter of Octavia, someone able already to produce offspring linked, at least indirectly, by blood to the princeps. Divorce in this case would not have been desirable. Augustus had already demonstrated his faith in Livia’s other son, Tiberius, by appointing him to replace Agrippa in the Balkans. He was the inevitable candidate for Julia’s next husband. In perhaps 20 or 19 Tiberius had married Agrippa’s daughter Vipsania, to whom he had long been betrothed. Their son Drusus was born in perhaps 14. In 11 Vipsania was pregnant for a second time, but Tiberius was obliged to divorce her, although he seems to have been genuinely attached to her. Reputedly when they met after the divorce he followed her with such a forlorn and tearful gaze that precautions were taken that their paths would never cross again. 

He was now free to marry Julia. This marriage marks a milestone in Tiberius’ career and in the ambitions that Livia would naturally have nursed for her son. Augustus was clearly prepared to place him in an advantageous position, and the process could be revoked only with difficulty. It is inevitable that there should be speculation among modern scholars that Livia might have played a role in arranging the marriage. Gardthausen claimed that she brought it off in the teeth of vigorous opposition. Perhaps, but the suggestion belongs totally to the realm of speculation. If Livia did play some part in winning over Augustus, she did it so skilfully and unobtrusively that she has left no traces, and the sources are silent about any specific interference on this occasion.

Nor can it be assumed that Augustus would have needed a great deal of persuading. No serious store should be placed in the claims in the sources that he held Tiberius in general contempt and was reduced to turning to him faut de mieux. Suetonius quotes passages from Augustus’ correspondence that provide concrete evidence that the emperor in fact held his adopted son in high regard. Suetonius chose the extracts to show his appreciation of Tiberius’ military and administrative skills, but his words clearly suggest a high degree of affection that seems to go beyond the merely formulaic. 

He addresses Tiberius as iucundissime, probably the equivalent in modern correspondence of ‘‘my very dear Tiberius.’’ He reveals that when he has a challenging problem or is feeling particularly annoyed at something, he yearns for his Tiberius (Tiberium meum desidero), and he notes that both he and Livia are tortured by the thought that her son might be overtaxing himself. Livia’s other son, Drusus, although arguably his brother’s match in military reputation and ability, seems to have been quite different from him in temperament. Where Tiberius was private, inhibited, uninterested in courting popularity, Drusus was affable, engaging, and well-liked, and there was a popular belief, probably naive, that he was committed to an eventual restoration of the republic. He had found a perfectly compatible wife in Antonia the Younger, a woman who commanded universal esteem and respect to the very end.

They produced two sons, both of whom would loom large on the stage of human events: Germanicus, who became the most loved man in the Roman empire and whose early death threatened to erode Livia’s popularity, and Claudius, whose physical limitations were an embarrassment to Livia and to other members of the imperial family, but who confounded them all by becoming an emperor of considerable acumen and ability. They also had a daughter, Livilla, who attained disrepute through her affair with the most loathed man in the early Roman empire, the notorious praetorian prefect Sejanus.

Drusus dominated the landscape in 9 bc. The year seemed to start auspiciously for Livia. In 13 bc the Senate had voted to consecrate the Ara Pacis, one of the great monuments of Augustus’ regime, as a memorial to his safe return from Spain and the pacification of Gaul. The dedication waited four years and finally took place in 9, on January 30, Livia’s birthday, perhaps her fiftieth. The honour was a profound one, but indirect and thus low-key, in keeping with Livia’s public persona. Her sons continued to achieve distinction on the battlefield. A decorated sword sheath of provincial workmanship has survived from this period.

It represents a frontal Livia with the nodus hairstyle, and shoulder locks carefully designed so as to flow along her shoulders above the drapery. She appears between two heads, almost certainly her sons, and the piece pictorially symbolises Livia at what must have been one of the most satisfying periods of her life. To cap her sense of well-being, Tiberius, after signal victories over the Dalmatians and Pannonians, returned to Rome to celebrate an ovation. Following the usual practice after a triumph or ovation, a dinner was given for the Senate in the Capitoline temple, and tables were set out for the people in front of private houses. 

A separate banquet was arranged for the women. Its sponsors were Livia and Julia. Private tensions may already have arisen between Tiberius and Julia, but at least at the public level they were sedulously maintaining an outward image of marital harmony, and Livia was making her own contribution towards promoting that image. Similar festivities were planned to celebrate Drusus’ victories. Presumably in his case Livia would have joined Antonia, Drusus’ wife, in preparing the banquet, as she had joined Tiberius’ wife on the earlier occasion.

While Tiberius had been engaged in operations in Pannonia, Drusus had conducted a highly acclaimed campaign in Germany. By 9 bc he had succeeded in taking Roman arms as far as the river Elbe. So awesome were his achievements that greater powers felt the need to intervene. He was visited by the apparition of a giant barbarian woman, who told him—she conveniently spoke Latin—not to push his successes further. Something was clearly amiss in the divine timing. Suetonius implies that Drusus heeded the warning, but calamity befell him anyhow. In a riding accident Drusus’ horse toppled over onto him and broke his thigh. He fell gravely ill. 

His deteriorating condition caused consternation throughout the Roman world, and it is even claimed that the enemy respected him so much that they declared a truce pending his recovery. (Similar claims were later made about his son Germanicus.) Tiberius had been campaigning in the Balkans at the time but had returned to Italy and was passing through Ticinum after the campaign when he heard that Drusus was sinking fast. Travelling the 290 km in a day and a night, a rate that Pliny thought impressive enough to record, he rushed to be with his brother. He reached him just before he died in September, 9 bc. Drusus was universally liked, and his death at the age of twenty-nine could not seriously be seen as benefitting anyone.

Nevertheless, it still managed to attract gossip and rumours. The death of a young prince of the imperial house would usually drag in the name of Livia as the prime suspect. In this instance such a scenario would have been totally implausible, and Augustus became the target of the innuendo instead. Tacitus reports that the tragedy evoked the same jaundiced reactions as would that of Germanicus, three decades later in the reign of Tiberius, that sons with ‘‘democratic’’ temperaments—civilia ingenia—did not please ruling fathers (Germanicus had been adopted by Tiberius). 

Suetonius has preserved a tradition that Augustus, suspecting Drusus of republicanism, recalled him from his province and, when he declined to obey, had him poisoned. Suetonius thought the suggestion nonsensical, and he is surely correct. Augustus had shown great affection for the young man and in the Senate had named him joint heir with Gaius and Lucius. He also delivered a warm eulogy after his death. Even Tiberius’ grief was portrayed as twofaced. To illustrate Tiberius’ hatred for the members of his own family, Suetonius claims that he had earlier produced a letter in which his younger brother discussed with him the possibility of compelling Augustus to restore the republic.

But events seem to belie completely the notion of any serious fraternal strife. Tiberius’ anguish was clearly genuine. His general deportment is of special interest, because of the light that it might throw on his and Livia’s conduct later, at the funeral of Germanicus. According to Seneca, the troops were deeply distressed over the death and demanded Drusus’ body. Tiberius maintained that discipline had to be observed in grieving as well as fighting, and that the funeral was to be conducted with the dignity demanded by the Roman tradition. He repressed his own tears and was able to dampen the enthusiasm for a vulgar show of public grief.

Tiberius now set out with the body for Rome. Augustus went to Ticinum (Pavia) to meet the cortege, and because Seneca says that Livia accompanied the procession to Rome, it is probably safe to assume that she went with her husband. As she travelled, she was struck by the pyres that burned throughout  the country and the crowds that came out to escort the funeral train. The event provides one of the few glimpses of Livia’s private emotions. She was crushed by the death and sought comfort from the philosopher Areus. On his advice, she uncharacteristically opened herself up to others. She put pictures of Drusus in public and private places and encouraged her acquaintances to talk about him.

But she maintained a respectable level of grief, which elicited the admiration of Seneca. Tiberius may well have learned from his mother the appropriateness of self-restraint in the face of private anguish. It was an attitude that was later to arouse considerable resentment against both of them. During the funeral in Rome, Tiberius delivered a eulogy in the Forum and Augustus another in the Circus Maximus, where the emperor expressed the hope that Gaius and Lucius would emulate Drusus. 

The body was taken to the Campus Martius for cremation by the equestrians, and the funeral bier was surrounded by images of the Julian and the Claudian families. The ashes were deposited in Augustus’ mausoleum. The title of Germanicus was posthumously bestowed on Drusus and his descendants, and he was given the further honour of statues, an arch, and a cenotaph on the banks of the Rhine. Augustus composed the verses that appeared on his tomb and also wrote a prose account of his life. No doubt less distinguished Romans, of varied literary talent, would have written their own contributions.

The anonymous Consolatio ad Liviam represents itself as just such a composition, intended to offer comfort to Livia on this very occasion, although it was probably composed somewhat later. Livia was indeed devastated, but as some form of compensation for her terrible private loss, she now, after some thirty years in the shadows, came into greater public prominence. The final chapter of Drusus’ life seems to have opened up a new one in his mother’s.”

- Anthony A. Barrett, “In the Shadows.” in Livia: First Lady of Imperial Rome