#with you in student accommodation :(
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being autistic and having to deal with bureaucracy is like “sorry for the communication error!” (not my fault even remotely)
#why is my prof all aggro about my not scheduling an exam with the university disability center#bitch i knew the policy beforehand. i didn’t schedule an exam because i simply did not want to take it 2 hours early!#how is it my fault that you didn’t go ahead and put me on the roster to test with the rest of the class knowing i didn’t schedule an exam#with accommodations#he seems actually mad that i wanted to know where to go for the test tonight as if it was my oversight and not his#that’s the policy babe!#if i don’t want an extra long exam i get put in the regular one#it’s literally the rule. disabled student doesn’t choose to use their accommodations -> they do the regularly scheduled stuff#autism#text post
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me when i live in a state that has decided teaching the bible to elementary students in public schools is the most effective way to positively impact students when the most accommodation my little brother could get for his adhd is “try using a planner”
#i don’t even know what to say or do#i just feel stunned. why would they do this? why would they approve this?#okay i know why but still. WHY#in what way is this benefiting students?#and this is only the start#texas is a political testing ground. the canary in the coal mine for the rest of the country if you will#if this is ALL they could offer my brother for a 504 plan BEFORE the DOE is dismantled?#my heart is aching for all the students who managed to get some semblance of accommodation
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thinking about how. MORE than one old white woman presiding over me during my master's program in some capacity,,, has gently (unprompted) insinuated to me that accommodations are available, academic or otherwise
like i've had classmates undergo the same meetings, the same presentations for the same prof, etc and they do Not get the same gentle "oh you poor little thing. is this so hard for you? do you need help?"
and it's like. on one hand cool, thanks, glad that's available. i am, however, legit fine and chilling and doing better than ever in a classroom environment because i Stopped Masking in my mid-twenties and i sit cross-legged and play with my spiky ball sometimes and i'm vibing
glad accommodations exist. none of them would do anything helpful for me specifically. but if me being visible is what it takes for you to ? ? feel like you're Helping students who need/use accommodations ? to assuage your Guilt idk lol ? then ok white woman i will continue to exist within eyesight
(wish you'd respect the accommodations of students who actually require them, instead of giving platitudes to me who is i guess more Visibly 'other' to you)
#refers to a lot of specifics that i won't get into lol#WILD to have an ableist prof who is so so so gentle with you and ur like.#huh ??? ur so rude to the students who need accommodations ?#you REFUSE to cooperate with the accessibility centre?#like. my friend sat for her presentation. got a note abt how that's 'unprofessional'#i sat. i took off my goddamn boots and sat cross legged for my presentation.#my notes said 'i know presenting can be hard!!!' MAAM ?#and the like. job advisor lady#told my friend 'oh u don't have a lot of extra curriculars... were u too busy?'#and told My Ass (minimal extra currs. i don't do anything.) 'accommodations are available xoxoxo'#maam i didn't ask#i love that accommodations are available. they're not for me. but thanks. i guess.#(i did take the accommodations for job shit admittedly bc job interviews are ass)#anyway. here's an entry from my diary abt my thoughts !#lmao...#hurgle says things
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Oh my adhd having students, I mean this in the most "I'm trying to help u pass this class" way possible: what the fuck am I supposed to do with you? And I mean that as an earnest question. If u have advice pls let me know.
#bc the thing is. u have to be in attendance to get credit for labs and u have to turn in assignments to get credit#and i dont kno how to make those things happen for you. so like???#and u can have flexible attendance but u dont get credit if u arent there and we cant do makeups for all the labs#bc that infringes on our lab manager's time in a way that doesn't work#and u can have flexible deadlines but like if u dont turn things in there's no credit to be given. so again???#i dont know how to help and i dont kno how much of this is im a dumb 18yo who is used to arrangements being made for me. bc i get that#from students who dont have learning disabilities vs how much is a genuine inability to keep things on task#and like how much am i expected to give? im just a graduate TA. i cant hold ur hand thru everything. im not paid to do that#but i want to help however i can. so like??? i dont kno what to do and i understand the frustration#as someone with a learning disability that isnt really helped by the accommodations i have access to#but is it a case of: u need to try harder or even trying ur hardest it's nnot possible. i dont kno. i cant kno#and what the fuck am i supposed to do if its the latter? it just sucks#unrelated
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no spoilers... but perhaps be on the lookout for the announcement of another kotlc event from me
#it will have a long creation period (thinking three months) in order to accommodate students in their semester#and it is not an exchange#and that's all you get from me for now! teeheheheheeheheh#catherine things#keepblr
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it's always such a strange thing when people say stuff like, "oh, my developmental cognitive delay, mental illness, etc NEVER gets believed in, not like PHYSICALLY disabled people," or, "oh, I NEVER get accommodations for my physical conditions in school, not like other students' LEARNING disabilities," "THIS kind of thing I experienced is uniquely oppressive and one of many roots of evil in the world, other power structures & people in positions of authority are NOT as harmful as the one I experienced, and the world is soooo much nicer & easier to everybody & every kind of cripple except me"
like I know of all the social media platforms tumblr has the rep of being the pity party site, but while you truly may have suffered and nobody is here to diminish that, y'all are moving very weirdly through life
#just saw a post abt gym teachers being sooooo much more abusive creepy & underqualified than academic teachers#and how gym is useless & has NO accommodations unlike how in math or english student accoms. must be honored & material must be taught well#my baby your experiences are nawt universal lmao#and the weird ableist elitism & snobbery of it all is deeply bizarre#like i've had shitty gym teachers who were freaks about people's capacity skill disability etc but you think MATH is better?? bffr lol
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i just think that if you’re a prestigious university trying to ‘encourage widening participation’ by visiting colleges in ‘underprivileged postcode areas’ you might want to consider how tone deaf it sounds when you tell us to ‘not worry about the financial aspect’
#‘you have student loans’#well my student loan will only cover half of what you’re charging in student accommodation so. what now.#are you going to tell me how you support students in finding jobs now or#‘people in your area are the least likely to move away to go to uni :(((‘#please put your oxbridge brain into gear for 5 seconds and consider why that might be
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sometimes I think about how when I went to college for a year before I dropped out (basically failed out,) the counselors/dean told me they can't help me at all or give any accommodations unless I have an official autism/adhd diagnosis. that might sound logical at first, but when you think about it more, it's actually quite fucked up. if someone is struggling really bad, what's the harm in helping them? why do they require a paper to get even the smallest amount of help? people who don't need help aren't going to be failing miserably without help! even NTs could benefit from some adjustments to the horrible school system! (but changing the entire system is a whole other conversation that the school system isnt ready for)
but even if you do agree to jump through their hoops, you realize it's even more fucked up that the diagnosis process requires YEARS in most cases (in my case it took 4 or 5 years, can't recall exactly now, for autism/adhd diagnosis, which would have meant i finished school before getting it if i managed to mot fail out, or i wait that long before going back, which is a whole struggle itself) and they also tried billing me for THOUSANDS of dollars because of insurance issues!!
so you put a ton of time and money into this, and then get told the only accommodation they are willing to give you for autism and adhd is "a little extra time on tests"
....
my test scores were the best part of my whole class experience. that was NOT what I struggled with!!!!! those tests were all online and could be done in the comfort of your home where you can accommodate yourself and have plenty of time left over when you finish them because you are comfy in your own space, (and also, no one was stopping you from having your notes/books/google open to find the answers,) and you don't even need a time consuming, expensive diagnosis for that!
SO WHAT'S THE POINT!!!!!!!
#mind you this was over 10 years ago now. it *could* have gotten better but id be extremely shocked if it has#autistic#autism#actually autistic#adhd#neurodivergent#audhd#school#school problems#yes i know theres rules or maybe even laws for this and its why they are like this but its bad and should change#if they offered smaller classes with less sensory overloading bullshit and other things i needed it would be great!#but they refuse to accommodate your actual needs and make up useless accommodations to legally say they help disabilities#ND people (not just audhd) and other disabled people that graduate with no useful accommodations are so strong and cool. proud of you!#ones who had to drop you youre also cool for not dealing with their bullshit snd allowing yourself to not suffer for a sheet of paper!#(though i know it can feel bad when everyone around you makes you feel bad for needed to drop out or failing out and not going back)#i completely stopped going to my psychology class because i started a week late due to scheduling issues and#suddenly we are told theres a paper due in 3 days and need to hse the textbook i didnt have yet as the source for it all#and it was in the syllabus i didnt get because i was a week late and didnt know we got one. the professor didnt notice me out of#the 100 other students in that large lecture hall. that room was also a sensory nightmare hellscape#too many students made things noisy and distracting. multiple fluorescent lights were flickering constantly and never fixed#the professor used a mic to speak to us and it had a constant horrible loud buzzing. it did that loud mic screech noise randomly#without warning. all the time. the quality of the sound was horrible so it was hard to understand her. on top of that she had a very thick#accent i wasnt familiar with so that on top of the horrible buzzing mkc quality that also cut her out constantly was auditory processing#disorder HELL. I dont know how ANYONE survived thst class but i seemed to be the only one struggling. everyone else turned in their papers#and i gave up and stopped going. was too late to drop the class to get my money back so i wasted probably a few thousand dollars#and THATS what i mean by give me reasonable and useful accommodation. test time would NOT make that class better at all#fix the mic and light issues at least or give me a smaller class with more attentive professor or something!#offer smaller classes for struggling disabled people! if the issue is not knowing who needs them then offer a switch to those struggling!#i got called onto a dean/counselor meeting because a professor noticed my horrible grades and stuff so its possible to catch us and help!#THESE SCHOOLS JUST NEED TO START BEING WILLING TO. dont make us do all the work to accommodate ourselves and expect to do well in school!
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announcement!!
i might be a little inactive on tumblr for a bit, but it's for good reason!! i'm going to be teaching full time for my last practicum in a couple weeks, and with another job on the side, i'm gonna be swamped with work :( dont worry pookies i will have a treat for everyone when i return
#i am super excited to teach#but man they really expect you to take a three month break from your regular jobs#not everyone can afford that and they are not accommodating whatsoever#theyre like yeah you'll be at a disadvantage that sucks!!#its ok i love teaching i love my students and thats all that matters#ali yaps
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no offense but the fourth week of the semester is not the time to be asking me to troubleshoot your homework system for you, especially when i sent out troubleshooting instructions during the first week
#if you're using a free trial then you shouldn't wait until it's over to figure out how to get access to the full thing#also i shouldn't need to remind you twice in the span of two emails that the questions you're asking are answered in the instructions#if this student asks me for an extension i'll probably grant it but i will not go out of my way to accommodate them#very annoyed to be getting this email at 1 in the morning#poast.txt
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GOOD LUCK ON EXAMS I HOPE YOU ENJOY NO MORE SCHOOL EVER!!!!! 🎉🎉🎉
THANKYOU SO MUCH!!!! IM SO EXCITEDDDDDDDD
#people keep saying 'but uni!!! but uni!!! you're finishing school but uni!!!!!!'#oh you mean the uni I'm going to??? with top notch disability accommodations and a huge commitment to supporting queer students?#that uni??? the one where my uncle is the head professor of astrophysics so I can say hi to him?#the one where the campus is spread out through my favourite city in the entire world???#where most of my work will be independent study? where the methods of teaching are my favourite way to learn???#where I'll get to stay in my own tiny house and live with my auntie and uncle (not mr astrophysics) who I adore???#IM SO EXCITEDDDDDDDD#I LOVE LEARNING!!!! high school has just. not been my best friend#ask tag#fren tag
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Writing thank u letters to my kids in their favorite colors like
#mine#if ur one of my students yes I picked a color I thought you would like just because I thought you would like it#I’m trying to accommodate as many different colors as I can but I only have so many pens lol
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seeing people i respect have dogshit opinions on AI :(
#i feel crazy#why is this person i really respect reblogging bad AI takes??#im sorry but AI is not an accessibility issue#using AI to write school papers is cheating. its not an accommodation#and i think that is the most baffling way to defend AI use#cause its absolutely the worse use case for it#AI doesnt know what a fact is. it just knows what a fact looks like#it makes up things all the time#relying on it to write papers is WILD#and then saying that its for ACCESSIBILITY???#like if you actually cared about disability accommodations you wouldn't be suggesting a tool that#(a) prevents students from learning important skills and (b) is often wrong???
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...
#it's an old frustration. an old pattern of thought.#i just feel that i have a brain that doesn't hold information. that lacks the discipline to gain knowledge. that is incapable of deeper#thought. and i cant teel you how maddening that is. to sit in a room and listen to other people discuss a paper you read in depth 5 times#like it's the 1st time you ever heard anything about it. how is that possible? how do i work with that? i read and nothing sticks.#nothing stays with me. how??? i was talking to a prof recently who ive heard is hard on her students with disability accommodation. and she#was saying how she doesnt see these things as a disability. how we're just different not disabled. ive heard the phrase differently abled#a lot of times. and i get what she's saying. i do. ad i get why she's hard on them. she wants to push them. but there comes a point where#you are quote unquote differently abled and you run into a wall that other people dont have. then what are you supposed to do? work harder?#but what if that doesn't help? what if that just compounds the hurt that's always been there? what if that leaches away all the wonder? what#then? at what point does a thing become too much of a barrier? i think there's a reason i dont run into many other dyslexic grad student.#everyone has adhd. it's a place where those with adhd prosper. but dyslexia not so much. at least not with the level of hanicap i have#and everyone's really nice. they want to help. but there's nothing anyone can do for me at this stage. it's up to me to compensate for my#leaky head. and i kno im not stupid. ive got a piece of paper stating my iq is above average after correcting for uneven intelligence. but#i dont feel very smart most of the time. i feel more like my uncorrected iq score that comes out at just below average even with me trying#my very best. iq is bullshit but there's something to be said for that gap. im smart if unconstrained by language and time. but were bound#by language and we're bound by time so what am i supposed to do? is there anything i can do? im stuck with this forever. theres no getting#better or making it easier. my brain is wired in a way that gives me the reading skills of a child. forever. and i just have to accept that#and im trying to swallow around that idea easier because the only other option is to choke on it. but maybe i chose the wrong career path.#one of my lab mates said she wants challenges all the time and ive chosen a path that's challenges all the time but im jsut trying to do#what everyone else can without a second thought. it's deeply demoralizing. yet here i am. trying to be easier abt it.#maybe im just nit cut out for this. doing a job im not built for.#unrelated
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Not people asking Celticists to do critical editions of texts because they asked us nicely to.
I would love to edit and translate manuscripts all day long, on top of working as a teaching assistant, my side job in the field that also pays me, preparing conference papers for presentation, which often includes translating Latin, Middle Welsh, Old Irish, Early Modern Irish, and Modern Irish myself, even when scholars before me have translated them (to ensure that the nuances are captured), adapting those papers to Powerpoints, arranging accommodations and flights for said conferences, playing Stardew Valley, organizing conferences/conference panels, working on my phd, working on projects that are actually publishable in the field, plotting the next Fomoire invasion of Ireland, as well as my various and assorted commitments to different groups and organizations that I am also doing without pay in order to bolster my CV so that there is a snowball's chance in Hell that I have a shot at employment, while even more senior scholars in the field have to struggle to justify their translation work. It reminds me of an article on the Celtic Students blog that talks about how the overwhelming amount of public outreach in the field, at the moment, is done by Grad Students, yours truly included.
In these digital spaces, students of Celtic Studies (predominantly graduate students) carry the brunt of the public's attention, and work to amend persistent pervasive errors or misunderstandings (such as 'did the Celts really fight naked in battle', 'were the Celts really matriarchal', and 'why did Saint Patrick commit a genocide against the pagans') that have found themselves deeply rooted in public consciousness. These misunderstandings appear to have been perpetuated by the rise of the internet giving the public access to wildly out of date scholarly publications, the Wikipedia articles on medieval Celtic literature being deeply inaccurate, and a small cottage industry of people producing exceptionally inaccurate self-published books (and ebooks) about 'Celtic Mythology' that dominate digital marketplaces such as Amazon and the Kobo storefront.
Despite this being important work, and entirely legitimate scholarly labor, it can be disheartening when this work is not recognized as legitimate or worthwhile by senior members of the field compared to standard scholarly activities.
#like it's a request but it's an inherently unreasonable one to ask of anyone#we KNOW there's a lot to be translated#we WANT to share it with the public#but we CAN'T#we're working on it as best as we can but we are GRAD STUDENTS#we are functionally amoebas in the field#amoebas with very uncertain futures#in a time when translation work isn't only long and tedious work#but also increasingly unfashionable#*I* wanted to do translation work for my PhD and I was basically told no#if you want me to do work that will not get me anywhere as far as my future career...pay me#per hour#Given that you're asking for the product of approximately 4-5 years of training I think that $25 is reasonable#Keeping in mind it can take me that long to translate a sentence...sometimes even a word#and of course in order to do a TRUE critical edition I'll need to see the manuscripts#which depending on if it's online or not means that you'll need to pay for my flights and accommodation in Dublin (most likely)#which if you know Dublin prices...*woo*#It's only a few thousand dollars or so#if it's that important to the public it's worth it
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‘izzy why are u on tumblr at 3am’ well i Was asleep but a guy tried to get into the fucking flat and my flatmates called security on him but the dude left before security arrived and we’re pretty certain it was the friend of a problematic flatmate but said flatmate is either fast asleep or not here. so what the fuck was maybe-his-friend doing banging on our flat door at 3am. also the flat hallway stinks like weed again. now i am awake
#why are people such dumbasses about smoking weed in the UK#like omfg if you’re gonna do it at least be smart#smoking it directly outside a university student accommodation building is just asking to have security callled on you#for being a nuisance if nothing else#i legally had to report the smell last week since i think it was coming from one of my flatmate’s rooms#(as part of my job working for the uni. it’s a whole thing)#and another flatmate was on my ass abt it#like man i don’t wanna be a narc. i’m a lefty american i love weed.#but it’s illegal here don’t be fucking stupid with how u go about smoking it#do it where it won’t linger and especially don’t do it in your bedroom???#fire hazard atp. that i Especially need to report immediately for the safety of a few hundred students in the building#sigh. wish i had edibles rn#i’m going back to sleep
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