#will i ever explain what this means? maybe. who knows

[usagiarchive]

what is love? — jing yuan x reader (in the eyes of yanqing)

"Ooh, maybe someday, could it happen to me too? When will it be? Who will it be? I wanna know, know, know, know, what is love?" — TWICE

sypnosis. [ 0.4k words. fluff. family. ] ��� When asked on the question of love, Yanqing thinks of his parents.

“Mama, what is love?”

You turn your attention to the little boy snuggled into your side as you read him a Xianzhou fairytale.

“What do you think love is, honey?”

The kid pondered for a moment before answering, “You and Dad are love!”

The joy he displayed on his face melted your heart and you couldn't help but bundle him up in your arms.

“Really? How so?”

“Don't you and Dad love each other? Isn't that love?”

You smiled and laughed a little, “That's an action, sweetheart, we love each other, it's not really a meaning, sweet boy,”

He tilted his head at you like a seal, very confused.

“The meaning of love and being in love are two different things, honey,” you tell him, not knowing how to approach the subject of love with a four-year old child.

“Think of it this way, let's think of love as your swords, Swords and using your swords are two different things, right?”

The child blinks up at you, “Mama, I understand… but at the same time I don't…”

You laughed and gave him a kiss on his forehead, “I'll explain when you're older, but for now… bedtime!”

…

Yanqing doesn't remember the interaction now that he's grown older, but if he thinks about what love is for him, you'd find his answer the same.

Love for him, was you and his Dad.

In the way that you learned to love tea as he did, even if you didn't like it at all, detested it at first, all because he loves it and you love him.

In the way his Dad never let you do anything when he's around, during grocery runs he'd lift all the bags and just let you hold his hand, during your weekend dates, he'd never let you worry about anything.

In the way you'd immediately get a pillow and a blanket if you find him sleeping in the patio (and most of the time join him), because he always complains about the crick in his neck he always has when he wakes up.

In the way he'd never seen the two of you have a serious fight, not in front of him at least, or not long enough that he'd notice because the two of you resolved anything within minutes of talking.

In the way his Dad would always peel an orange for you to share, “A half for your Mom, a half for me”, even if you'd go for a second orange, half of it will always be the other’s.

So yeah, if ever you'd ask Yanqing what love is. His answer would be you and Dad.

And maybe… he thinks as he pictures a certain spitfire girl that burrowed her way into his heart, maybe he can find a love like that, too…

usagi's note: december has been so incredibly kind to me (aside from me breaking my foot and not getting sunday) it's actually been so nice, ive met more people in this app and people here are so supportive and nice! i think ill enjoy this more hehe, merry christmas guys :))

also guys how do you do the tiny text thing? im so interested and i kinda wanna try that type of format in my works.

@usagiarchive 2024. do not repost, translate, or use for AI.

[pnutbutter-n-j-elyy]

girl i love your stories that i reread them A LOT. idk if your request is open but if it's not then you can do it whenever I WILL WAIT MY WHOLE LIFE FOR IT

some angst (but end with fluff) about y/n being bad at directions (me tbh) so she keeps clinging to minho and his friends (during idk maybe their tour in japan or other vacations)so when minho snaps at her she left the restaurant immediately and thought about going back to hotel but get lost and her phone died then when minho find out she's not back till late at night he starts going crazy looking for her around

i'll let you get creative from here! tq!!!!

I hope you enjoy!!!

The trip to Japan had been an exhilarating whirlwind of sights and sounds. But for you, it also became a constant struggle to keep up with the group. Your terrible sense of direction was something you’d always laughed off, but here, in the bustling chaos of unfamiliar streets, it felt like a glaring flaw. You clung to Minho more than you intended to, relying on him to guide you when you inevitably got turned around.

By the third day, his patience began to wear thin.

It started with small sighs, then curt remarks. But tonight, as you hesitated once again at an intersection, unsure which way to go, Minho snapped. His voice cut through the group’s chatter, sharp and biting.

“For God’s sake, Y/N, can you stop acting helpless for five minutes? It’s not that hard to figure out where we’re going.”

The words stung like a slap, and the embarrassment that followed was suffocating. The others fell silent, their eyes darting between the two of you. Chan stepped forward, his voice firm and reprimanding.

“Minho, that’s enough! You don’t ever talk to her like that. You hear me?”

Minho opened his mouth to retort but quickly shut it, guilt flashing across his face under Chan's firm glare. Still, the damage was done. You felt small and out of place, like an unwelcome burden. Chan gave you a shoulder squeeze before going to scold Minho a bit more. The group resumed walking, the atmosphere tense as all the boy looked over in your direction with awkward and pitiful glances. Felix and Jeongin tried to lighten your mood by talking casually with you, but the lump in your throat wouldn't shake.

When you reached the restaurant, you quietly excused yourself, claiming you needed some air. No one stopped you. Outside, the cool night air hit your face as tears blurred your vision. You decided to head back to the hotel, thinking it was better to remove yourself from the group altogether.

But as you wandered through the maze of streets, panic began to set in. Every turn seemed to lead to another unfamiliar alley, and your phone’s battery was dwindling fast. When it finally died, leaving you stranded without maps or a way to contact anyone, fear took hold.

Back at the restaurant, the group noticed your prolonged absence. Jisung was the first to speak up, glancing around nervously.

“Uh, has anyone seen Noona? She’s been gone for a while.”

Minho, who had been unusually quiet since his outburst, froze. Chan frowned, his protective instincts kicking in.

“I’ll check outside,” Jisung offered, already heading for the door. He returned a few minutes later, his expression grim.

“She’s not out there,” he said, his voice edged with worry. “I think she’s gone.”

Minho shot to his feet, his heart hammering in his chest. “What do you mean, gone?”

“I don’t know!” Jisung replied, his voice rising. “I can’t find her anywhere. She’s not answering her phone either.”

The weight of the situation hit Minho like a freight train. His earlier anger dissolved into a nauseating mix of fear and guilt. Without another word, he bolted out of the restaurant, desperate to find you.

You’d been wandering for what felt like hours when a man approached you. He looked to be in his fifties, his kind eyes and warm smile a stark contrast to the bustling city around you.

“Are you lost?” he asked in Japanese. You nodded, tears streaming down your face as you tried to explain your situation.

“Come,” he said gently, switching to broken English. “My daughter recognized you. Said you are with boyfriend, Minho? Safe at our house. You charge phone.”

Too exhausted and desperate to refuse, you followed him to a modest house nearby. His daughter, a young woman about your age, greeted you with tea and a charger. The warmth of their home was comforting, but your heart ached with the weight of the evening’s events.

Minho was spiraling. He darted from street to street, asking anyone he came across if they’d seen you. When he entered a small cafe, the owner paused, recognizing your description.

“Yes,” she said. “She left with an older man. He seemed…kind. Not dangerous.”

Her words did little to calm Minho’s fraying nerves. The thought of you- vulnerable and alone- with a stranger nearly pushed him to the brink of a breakdown. His hands trembled as he tried to focus.

“Where? Which way did they go?” he demanded.

She pointed him in the right direction, and he took off without a second thought. When he finally reached the house and saw you through the window, sitting safely with the older man and his daughter, the relief was overwhelming. He knocked and burst through the door, his chest heaving.

“Y/N,” he choked out, rushing to your side. “Are you okay? I was…I was so scared.”

Tears welled up in your eyes as you nodded, too overwhelmed to speak. Minho pulled you into his arms, holding you tightly as if to make sure you were really there.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice breaking. “I…I shouldn’t have yelled at you. I didn’t mean it. I…I can’t lose you.”

You let out a shaky breath, but before you could respond, the daughter handed you a photo card she’d been holding. It was of Minho, from a recent album. She giggled nervously, gesturing to the collection spread out across the table.

“I'm a big fan,” she said in English, and you couldn’t help but smile. "So, I recognized her from your posts."

“Thank you for helping her,” Minho said to her and the father in Japanese, his voice hoarse. Then, in a move that stunned everyone, he sank to his knees. Lowering himself further until his forehead almost touched the ground, he bowed deeply, the ultimate gesture of gratitude and humility, as he cried out words you couldn't understand, but the small family did.

“Thank you,” he said again in English, his voice trembling. “Thank you for keeping her safe. Thank you.”

The father’s eyes widened in surprise before he helped Minho up, patting his shoulder reassuringly before he looked at you. “She…good girl. You take care of her, yes?”

Minho nodded fervently, his gaze flickering to you. “Always.”

As the family waved you off, Minho kept a protective arm around you the entire walk back to the hotel. Neither of you spoke much, but his grip on you never loosened, his actions speaking louder than words ever could.

By the time you reached the entrance you took a shaky breath. "I'm sorry-"

Minho pulled you into his chest before you could say anything else. "You scared me." He whispered. "I was so scared- people...they can be dangerous."

You didn't say anything, just sunk further into his embrace, your lips turning into a pout as Minho held you.

"You found her?" Chan's accent cut through the sound of Minho's rapid heartbeat as him and Han rushed over. "I'll call the rest of the guys and tell them to come back."

Another wave of guilt hit you and you tried to sputter out another apology but Han spoke.

"It's not your fault Y/N. It's Minho's for acting that way."

You looked up at Minho, whose eyes were blank. "I'm tired. Let's head to bed." He said quietly, pulling you along. He walked into your hotel room and kicked off his shoes, pulling you under the covers with him.

He pulled you flush against his chest and rested his chin on your shoulder.

"I'm sorry." He said again. "I'm a horrible boyfriend." You turned in the bed towards him, and your heart tugged at seeing his eyes. He had been silently crying, and when he felt he didn't want you to see him cry any longer he buried his face in your chest, hugging you closer.

"I forgive you. You don't have to say sorry."

"I do. I put you in a dangerous position because of my frustrations. That's ignorant of me. If anything had happened-" His voice was muffled but you heard the slight crack in it.

'Well, nothing happened so I'm okay. I'm safe. And the father and daughter were such a cute little family and kind. You were her bias as well so if anything I was probably the most safe there." You teased. Minho didn't say anything instead pulled the blanket tighter around you.

You sighed and closed your eyes, deciding to just let Minho wallow. When he thought you were asleep he moved the strands of hair stuck to your cheek and laid a gentle kiss there.

"I'm not letting you out of my sight for the rest of this trip." You stayed still as he placed another kiss on the corner of your lips, then forehead.

"I love you, jagiya." He murmured, before resting his forehead against yours, a drifting off into a dreamless sleep with you.

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@abovenyx @wolfs-archive @oddracha

@iyeeeverydee @parisanmorovati @seungmincenteric

@panbish-1209 @fxiry-vtt @sseawavee

@shuporanporang @amarecerasus @softkisshyunjin

@whoa-jo @meanergreener @rikibun

@ayyonoona @shinywombatcrusade @y4yayael

@skzstan12345 @mariteez @allys-reads

@jazziwritesthings @skzstannie @yongbokkiesworld

@kkkeopi @neverendingstay @moony-9

@minsungsthirdwheel @everlastingspring143 @joyofbebbanburg

@leezanetheofficial @tr-mha-fan @bubbly-moon

@night-storm7 @missmajdastark @axel-skz

@rockstarkkami

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[sleepyparalysisdmon]

SVT with a partner that struggles with an ED

Requested? Yes!

Request: ‘hi, if you're comfortable, could you write svt with a partner who has eating disorders? im so sorry if you're not comfortable with that, i did read your guidelines post but maybe I've missed it! have a lovely day :) 💜’

TW/CW: This will discuss a sensitive topic. It is meant to be comforting and relatable, but if you’re not in a headspace for it right now, I recommend not reading. 

A/N: I recognize that idols often have issues like this of their own, but for the sake of this post, I won’t be addressing it in this reaction. The pressure to look a certain way is one of the many things I fundamentally disagree with about the idol industry. I’d really rather them carry a little more weight and be happier and healthier. I think most of us would. 

Focuses on the physical recovery - Seungcheol, Hoshi, Mingyu, Chan

The physical impact of the disorder is what makes him put his foot down about it. If you like to maintain a certain body type, he can’t say too much about it and really does want you to be happy with your body. But he can say plenty about the anemia, the low blood pressure, the GI issues, the hormonal issues, the dental problems, etc. You never feel good, and he’s tired of it. He won’t be mean, but he’ll be stubborn and insistent that you seek treatment of some sort, with the first goal to just start feeling better physically. 

Focuses on the behavioral recovery - Joshua, Wonwoo, DK, Seungkwan, Vernon

Encourages you to eat and also encourages you to keep said food down. Those are non-negotiables to him. But he also encourages you not to overdo it on the food and to pace yourself when it comes to exercising. He stresses moderation for those last two things. He’ll figure out what you feel comfortable eating until you’re ready to try a normal diet because a little food is better than nothing. And he’s so calm when that doesn’t go well sometimes, reminding you that it will be okay, but he wants you to be just as brave about it as he is patient. But if it does go well, he’ll give you endless amounts of praise for facing the issue head-on. 

Focuses on the psychological recovery - Jeonghan, Jun, Woozi, Minghao

Feels that it’s best to tackle this sort of thing at the root of the issue. He wants to know when this habit started and why you feel compelled to keep doing it. If it’s poor body image, he’ll listen patiently, but you have to listen to him explain how he sees you, which may be hard to do because his take is so different. If it has something to do with how you were raised regarding food, he’s dissecting that with you, so maybe one day it will click that it’s not the way to live life now. And if it’s about control or perfectionism, he’s encouraging you to start letting go of some of it and trust that it will be okay if you change your behavior or your weight. Exceedingly patient about it without ever making you feel that you’re being irrational when you struggle with this. 

[tangents-within-tangents]

Hey if you see my most recent reblog, I have already apologized. And explained my misunderstandings and miscommunications. I get that the things I was responding to probably came from my own misinterpretations of what your ask was talking about. My fucking bad.

I've learned, I've admitted wrong, I'm trying to implement those changes. Idk what else I can do. I regret this post and how it's affected people, but deleting it won't get rid of it, so what else can I do but apologize and try to do better?

Regardless, everything you are saying I'm arguing for is not what I was trying to say. Most of your questions I have already clarified multiple times in my other reblogs/replies and I'm tired of repeating myself.

aro and ace identities are about diff things. also, you could argue THOSE ones are "additional" to other identities like bi/homo/pan/etc. like whats your logic here?

Here's my logic: Say we have someone who thinks they are straight and labels themself as such. Overtime they realize they are actually bi. They change the label from 'heterosexual' to 'bisexual'. Later they discover they are ace, but not aro. They could then change the label to 'biromantic asexual' (even though when they identified as bisexual they didn't feel the need to say 'biromantic and bisexual' it was implied to mean both). If they then discover they are aplatonic they would label themselves as 'biromantic asexual aplatonic'. Right? If they discover they are also non-binary: 'biromanic asexual aplatonic non-binary'. That's what I meant by additional.

Clarifying distinctions between identities/umbrellas (where they are similar and helpfully grouped and where they are not) is not exclusive. That's why I used comparisons to other Lgbt+ stuff. Would you say that creating the term 'bisexual' or "trans" is exclusive and just gay people 'not wanting anything to do with that'? No. (Like I've seen a lot of people saying agender is Aspec and I think that's one we can agree is not actually included in that umbrella term. It's a gender identity and has nothing to do with lack of attractions, when would it ever be useful to talk about them together as one? But saying that it is not under that umbrella does not make it any less valid and important of a label/identity and doesn't mean it's not included under Lgbt+. And obviously doesn't mean that an agender person could never ALSO fall under that umbrella with a different aspect of their identity. And that person could totally talk about both at the same time, but they'd be talking about two distinct things)

your whole post here screams the same shit they say about aro and ace people. "yea thats valid but we don't really want it relating to us in any way. maybe if you don't feel welcomed gtfo" like?? THAT is your argument?

I get how it came off that way and I regret my wording, but no that is not my argument (the "if you don't feel welcome, sometimes it's not the right place' was bc I MISUNDERSTOOD and thought you meant that allosexual apls need to feel welcome in the ace community which is objective not true). I specifically said we need a term for the whole inclusive A-umbrella AND a term for just sexual and romantic orientations within that. If you don't think that second term is necessary, okay, but it really has been for me and many of us in that community for a long time (if you aren't convinced see my other reblogs or the one from @fiesty-spirit-bear for more about that connection. But you even connected them in your ask by saying "sexual/romantic relationships". By definition a non-platonic relationship, the opposite of a platonic relationship, is a sexual and/or romantic one. They are distinct relationships and therefore distinct aspects of one's life). Clarifying terms and how they are being used is not (automatically) exclusive (and the reason I said "I'm curious what other's think" is bc I know I'm not in charge and that I'm limited to my own perspectives).

Also, there's a difference between exclusion and just having one conversation at a time. Maybe it'll help to explain my experience with the word a bit? (I know this is all irrelevant to the topic of the og ask at this point but I've made a fuss so I just want to explain ig):

I made some posts for ace week this year and found that there were times where what I was talking about was just as applicable to aro issues as it was to ace issues, because amatonormativity often treats them as interchangeable (and bc SAM doesn't apply to everyone). If what I was writing was specific to just sex/sexual relationships, I would just use the word/tag "ace". If it was just romance/romantic relationships, I'd use "aro". But it wasn't, and it wasn't exclusive to just "aroace" either, it was "ace OR aro OR aroace" collectively, "aro and/or ace -spec". In my experience, the word "aspec" is used to refer to just that. But to be sure I was using it correctly I googled it first and read this whole wiki (the first result, which I linked above too) and decided yes, that is the correct definition of that term. It is just 'the aro and ace spectrums together' and therefore I can use it to mean that. (I also use it as an ambiguous term so that I don't have to refer to myself as "ace-spec and aro-spec" or divulge my specific microlabels (like I did above) every time I wanted to talk about something referring to both. If I was just ace, I could just say ace, but I'm not, nor am I aroace)

IF instead the results had been that "aspec" means 'the whole A umbrella', I would not have used it there. Bc in that case if I did use it to refer to only the aro and ace spectrums, that would actually be exclusive of all the other A's bc my post didn't mention related issues for all of them (and bc allosexual and/or alloromantic people can fall into those other A spectrums, so they obviously wouldn't find any relevance to a post only talking about aro/ace topics). But that is not the definition of "aspec" that is most common and widely accessible.

I'm not trying to redefine the communities, I'm trying to clarify solely the words we use to refer to them. Wanting a word for just the aro and ace spectrums is not wanting an exclusive word, just one that is more specific. I'm not saying that a word for the whole A-umbrella is not "too inclusive" it's just too broad for certain conversations. And having a distinct word for each in this way would actually help to avoid exclusion (and miscommunication since both definitions are currently in circulation (tho only on Tumblr tbh, I have not seen 'aspec' be used for 'the full A umbrella' anywhere else)).

Yes not all aro/ace's are alloplatonic, and therefore those communities need to be inclusive of aplatonic aro/aces (an idea I openly expressed multiple times and have taken to heart personally). But not all apls are aro/ace either, and aro/ace specific communities do not need to accommodate ALLO sexuals/romantics.

(Which is all (mostly) unrelated to the relationship hierarchy stuff you were talking anyway)

being apl in aspec communties sucks sm. everything is all about how important platonic relationships are and "dismantling relationship heirarchies", while just building new ones. it feels super unwelcoming.

like yea sure to YOU sexual/romantic relationships don't mean anything/are devalued/etc, but not to all of us!! some of us LIKE those things, and MORE than platonic relationships. its like we rnt even aspec at all 2 these people, like sorry some of us go against the grain of society while still having certain ""non queer"" parts to our identity. i feel like we are seen as not aspec/lgbt enough to participate in those communities. so much about the aspec communtity is about how untalked about we are and how we are never included or thought about in discussions, but aro and ace communtities do the same to us!!!

.

[theocddiaries]

Sonic: Oh, careful, here comes Mr. Polite himself… Robotnik: What do you mean by that, you rat? Shadow: That your vocabulary consists mostly of insults. Robotnik: What are you talking about, you failed experiment piece of crap?! When have I ever disrespected anyone? Name one single time! FLASHBACKS 1. Robotnik: Let me explain it to you. You’re dumb, I’m smart. You have power, I steal it. You now have to fix the mess I made using that stolen power, and I step aside while plotting how to ruin your day tomorrow. You think, "what a bastard the fat guy is," and I tell you, "exactly," because it was embarrassing how long it was taking you to understand the dynamic, Shadow. 2. [Shadow is lying on a stretcher, struggling to breathe.] Robotnik: Good news. Sonic: Can you help him? Robotnik: No, I have no bloody idea how this guy works. Sonic: Then what’s the good news?! Robotnik: Well, didn’t he have a death wish? Congratulations, Shadow, today your dreams will come true. 3. [Rouge and Sonic gift their Chao to Shadow.] Rouge: Shadoooow, look what we got for you~ Shadow: Ugh, I told you I don’t want-- Aw, it looked at me. It’s mine now. [takes the Chao and pets it.] Robotnik [passes by, freezes when he sees the Chao]: Holy crap, it’s multiplying! [Eggman throws a can at the Chao, sending it flying and bouncing from the impact. Shadow yelps and goes to see if it's okay] Robotnik: You're welcome! And you owe me a soda! 4. Robotnik: Good morning, Commander Towers. What do you need me for? To tell you the time? Let me see… Well, look for yourself. Yes, sir, a solid gold watch. Earned dishonorably, unlike you, who hires zoo animals to avoid paying the bare minimum a human would charge. Rouge [frowning alongside Shadow]: Eggman, we’re right here. Robotnik: And the peanuts they pay you with are over there. [Laughs in their faces.] 5. [Shadow is collecting signatures. Eggman approaches angrily, grabs the papers, and tears them to pieces.] Robotnik: You! Traitor! Collecting signatures to get me kicked off the island, huh?! You ungrateful wretch! If it weren’t for me, you’d still be a frozen popsicle! Shadow: …Ivo, first of all, you did that for yourself, like everything else. Maybe that’s why they want you gone. And second, this isn’t the petition to kick you out. I was collecting signatures for a charity event to help the children’s hospital. Robotnik: Oh… well, sorry, I didn’t realize you were on one of your karma-burning stupid stuff. I knew that even with our differences, you wouldn’t participate in that. Shadow [hands over some laminated pages]: Oh, no, I did participate. Here are all the signatures to officially kick you out. Robotnik: What?! [takes the pages and starts hitting Shadow in the face with the laminated papers like a fan.]: I curse the hour, minute, second, and millisecond my grandfather thought it’d be a good idea to teach you how to speak and write!!!!! 6. Sonic: No way, I’m not doing anything with this guy. I bet I won’t even take a single step before he throws me down the stairs. Robotnik: Hey, that’s offensive, Sonic. This is a mess that affects all of us. I’ve got robots and a daughter waiting for me at home, you know? Sonic: Well, yeah, but… Robotnik: But what? So much talk, so little action. You love saying everyone deserves a chance to get applause, but when it really matters… Sonic: Alright, you’re right. I’m sorry. Let’s go-- [Sonic starts going down the stairs. Robotnik shoves him, and Sonic tumbles down while Robotnik laughs hysterically, to the point of tears]. Robotnik: Hahaha! Oh my God! [to the rest of the group]: I swear on everything, I meant it. I wasn’t going to do it! But he looked at me with that dumb innocent face, and I couldn’t resist! Hahahahaha!!!! PRESENT Robotnik: …I said one time. How are you supposed to understand my sense of humor when you can’t even understand a simple question? I feel so intellectually lonely…

[loomiseater]

Coffee☕️🍂

warnings: smut ofc!, fluff, public oral sex, oral!m!receiving, cum play, and dom!reader.

Criticism is appreciated! I would love to know how I can improve on my writing.

Spencer Reid x fem!reader

A/N: this was originally supposed to be just fluff but I suck at fluff😭..ngl this shit made me horny asf.

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Written: September 30th, 2024- December 26th, 2024

Published: December 26th, 2024

Summary: Spencer asks you out for coffee and things get heated at the library.

wc: 1,803

“H-hey Y/n.” He responded with a little stutter. I’ve always known Spencer to be this shy, quiet, but well spoken man. For some reason he seemed even more shy at this moment. “What’s up?” I asked as I began packing my purse up.

He sat there for a moment, gathering his thoughts before speaking up. “I was wondering if..maybe you’d like to get coffee with me and go to a book store..?” Spencer hesitantly asked. My face lit up with the biggest smile ever. Did I just get asked out by Spencer Reid?!

My heart was pounding and my body began to feel hot. Without hesitation I answered quickly. “Yes! I would love to, Spence!” His face looked as if he was relieved, yet happy.

You were the girl Spencer has been wanting for the past 2 years and he finally had the courage to ask you out. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Y/n.” He said as he nodded his head before stepping into the elevator. I made sure the elevator doors closed all the way before silently congratulating myself.

I was so happy I didn’t even notice Morgan was there the whole time. “Looks like pretty boy finally asked you out.” He announced with that smirk on his face. My eyes widened at his statement. What did he mean finally?

“Morgan?” I questioned as he took a sip of his coffee. “What?” He replied.

“What do you mean finally?” I asked as he just chuckled. “You really haven’t noticed, have you?” What the hell is he talking about?! I shook my head no at him as sighed and threw his head back. “I can’t believe you’re that oblivious, you’re a profiler for fucks sake.” He said as I rolled my eyes. “Get to the point Morgan!” I stated.

I was anxious to know what he meant and he kept dragging this whole thing out. “Pretty boy likes you. You’re the only person who he ever hugs, shares food with, and he’s constantly stares at you when you’re not looking.” He explained.

I didn’t wanna get my hopes up. Maybe Derek was right, but I’m not gonna believe it until I hear it from Spencer’s mouth. Plus Derek plays around a lot. “Yeah right! Why should I believe you?” I asked with a raised eyebrow as he chuckled.

“Because he told me himself.” Morgan smirked as my jaw dropped. “Really?!” I desperately asked. “You two would make a cute couple.” He chuckled as he patted me on the back, heading towards the elevator doors. “Derek!” I shouted as he was now pressing the elevator button. “Goodnight, sweetheart!” He shouted back with a smirk.

I groaned to myself.

____________

It was the day. I was going out with Spencer. I’m so nervous, yet so excited. I haven’t been able to stop smiling all day. It was fall outside so I decided to wear some stockings with a skirt and a long sleeve top. Nothing too over the top.

Spencer decided to meet me at my apartment so we could walk to the coffee shop and the library. I sprayed some fall scented perfume on as I heard a knock on the door. That’s him!

I rushed to the door and opened it immediately, I was met with the tall, scrawny, handsome Spencer Reid. “Hi, Y/n.” He softly greeted with a smile on his face. “Hey, Spence!” I greeted back. “You ready?” He asked as I said Yes and we headed out the door.

We made it to the coffee shop, Spence paid for the both of us, I told him that he didn’t have to, but he insisted. He then started putting in a bunch of sugar in his coffee as I eyed him. He saw my expression and laughed a bit. “The sugar helps me stay up.” He explained.

“You haven’t tried melatonin gummies?” I genuinely asked. “I’ve never heard of it. Does it work?” He asked curiously. “What?! The famous Dr. Reid doesn’t know about melatonin gummies?!” I faked gasped as he chuckled. “In my defense, I’m not on the internet that often.” He explained.

We walked out the coffee shop and were now on our way to the library. “Really? Then what do you do all day?” I asked, curiosity coating my words. “I like to read.” He said softly as he pressed his lips together. Gosh, he’s so cute.

We finally made it to the library, the smell of books hitting our noses. “How bout you?” He asked as I looked over at him. “What?”

“Do you read?” He asked, his eyes widening, hoping you’d say yes.

“I do actually..but not serious books like you. To be honest, I’m into comics and murder mystery.” I stated. “Maybe you’d let me read one of your comics?” He awkwardly asked as I giggled. “Of course! I have some back at my place.” I answered as a smile covered his face.

We walked over to the book section and Spencer saw a science book. He started rambling about it, I never understand what he’s saying, I just like hearing him speak. It’s so cute seeing him talk about something he’s so passionate about. I zoned out, I was just looking at him while smiling that I didn’t even hear him say my name.

“-Y/n?” “Sorry. What were you saying?” I asked. “Would you want to be an astronaut?” He replied. I quickly shook my head no as he laughed. “Why not? You get to see stuff the average human doesn’t and study stars.” He said before taking a sip of his coffee.

“It’s all fun and games until something goes wrong and you get stuck in space.” I stated as he shrugged his shoulders. “That’s a fair reasoning.” Spencer said understandingly.

We walked past another section of books and one particular book caught my eyes. Fifty Shades of Grey. Spencer took notice to this as he walked over to the book I picked up. “What’s this?” He asked I smirked. “You’ve never heard of this?” He shook his head no. “Have you seen the movies?” He shook his head no. “Do you know what it’s about?” He shook his head no again as I giggled.

I took this as my opportunity to do what I’ve been wanting since I laid my eyes on him. “I can give you a hint.” I said lowly ask I wrapped my arms around his neck. He placed his coffee on the shelf next to him as his breath hitched. We both moved our heads until our lips touched and I brought him into a slow, deep, passionate kiss.

I gripped some of his hair as he groaned into my mouth. I was starting to get wet just from the sound that came out of him. I wrapped one leg around his waist as he gripped my ass, making me softly moan. “I need you.” He said with desperation in his eyes. I forgot that we were in public. I hope no one heard us.

“I need you too.” I pleaded. I placed one last kiss to his lips before getting on my knees in front of him. His eyes widened, shocked at the acts I’m about to do. “We’re in public- we can’t!” Spencer whispered shouted. I just looked up at him with doe eyes as I unbuckled his belt. He let out a sigh, giving up.

I pulled his pants down some, along with his underwear. His cock was hard and red es ever. I placed a kiss to his tips, then his balls as lost his breath for a second. “Y/n.” He whispered. I licked a stripe up his dick as he squeezed his eyes shut. I stopped teasing him and finally took him whole. I deepthroated him, his tip hit the back of my throat as he almost lost his balance, his hand gripping the shelf for stability.

“Nghh!” He moaned. I took him out my mouth and put him back in, bobbing my head up and down. He grabbed my hair and started guiding me to suck it just how he likes it. “Mhmm” my moans vibrated on his cock as he grunted.

I hollowed my mouth as I looked up at him with doe eyes. His chocolate brown eyes were wide, he couldn’t believe what he was doing, especially in public. Anyone could walk past and see what was going on, he felt sick for enjoying it, deep down he wants someone to walk past and see his cock shoved down your throat.

I felt his dick twitch, now taking him out my mouth and sucking on his balls. “Fuck I’m gonna cum!” He choked out. “Cum.” I lowly said. As I said, he did. He let out a low whine as his cum shot all over my face as I opened my mouth letting some of it fall in. My face was covered in Spencer’s cum, my cheeks, eyelashes, lips, and the inside of my mouth.

I licked up his dick again, licking up all the excess cum and placing a kiss on his balls. I then stood back up and wrapped one arm around his neck. I wiped some of his cum off my face and stuck my hand down my skirt rubbing his cum all on my pussy.

Poor boy looked like he could barely stand. He stared at me in awe as I grabbed his hand placing it inside my skirt, he rubbed my clit some, smearing his cum all around. I was trying to hold my moans in but it was so hard. “Mhhm Spencer!” I moaned into his chest. “You’re so wet.” He said in amazement. “Because of you.” I responded.

I started moaning into his ear while his fingers were still rubbing my clit as I saw a worker. She made eye contact with me. Her eyes widened and she hurried off, terrified at what she just saw.

Spencer pushed me off of him and pulled his pants off. “I need you so bad right now. We’re going to my place.” He stated as I smirked. Spencer was so focused on getting some pussy that he didn’t even bother buckling his belt. On top of that I still had his cum on my face.

We walked out the doors as another worker looked at us in shock. She knew what we’d been up to just from the looks of us. I smirked at her as we walked out the building.

I’m about to have the best sex of my life.

[impala124]

Bad Buddy Ep 5

My thoughts on Ep 1 | Ep 2 | Ep 3 | Ep 4

Me, at the end of this episode:

Well, @starryalpacasstuff, I understand why you were excited for me to get to this episode, because it was a lot. So, here we go:

Pat definitely isn't beating the puppy allegations with his propensity for sniffing everything.

Don't be a lying liar now, Pran; you think Pat's face is the epitome of cuteness. I know they are going to hurt me because they opened this episode with this domesticity.

Ok, I need 3 business days to process my feelings about Pran's doodles of their interactions. Pran, my beloved, is a top-tier yearner.

"There's nothing wrong with rewearing clothes." Pat is a sustainability king.

Ink, are you a PatPran shipper? If so, please join Pa, who is waiting for you in the corner with snacks.

Pat, tell me you didn't bring Ink to the place where you had your first date with Pran. You did? The betrayal! I guess I'll have to forgive you because you yourself weren't aware that you were on a date with Pran.

Pa's in the house, guys. Reason has entered the chat. I love that she encourages him to know if his feelings for Ink are genuine or not.

I hope we get to see more of Ink and Pa together, even if it's just them being friends.

Oh, this is interesting. Pat is subconsciously realizing that he sees Pran in a different light. What exactly? He doesn't know. I do feel bad for my confused son, though.

Pran saw Pat and Ink on their date at the mall. Why is the world conspiring against my boy to only cause him pain?

So, we're going the jealousy route now, aren't we?

Not Pat asking Pran if Wai ever spent the night in the dorm 💀💀. And Pran, totally unaware of Pat's emotional turmoil, answered that Wai in fact did sleep right where Pat did.

These flashbacks are killing me. Pran was really soft-launching a confession by saying that he wanted to compose a song that conveys the sense of 'born to be together.' AHHHHHHHH.

Something about Pat asking Pran if he would like him if Pran were Ink and Pa telling Pat that she would confess her feelings to Ink if she were Pat is making me wanna chew on glass.

Pran asking Pat if Ink is at the contest venue and saying that she should be there to support Pran😭😭😭😭.

NO. HE DID NOT. Pran, bestie, tell me you didn't belt out the song that you wrote with your high school 'friend' in a competition against him. You did! Is it petty? Maybe. Petty Pran is in the house and I AM LIVING. I support him 100 percent.

Ink, the woman that you are!!! "You don't seem to be afraid of heartbreak." She was spitting nothing but facts here. Now that Pat knows where he and Ink stand, I hope she remains being a great friend to him because my boy's a mess, and he can use all the help he can get while sorting out his romantic feelings for Pran. I don't think his friends are going to be of any help in this matter. He has Pa, but I think Ink can be more objective when it comes to Pran.

Pat is jealous that his 'friendship' with Pran is a secret.

Pat really went from saying, "I'm not your wife," to acting like a jilted wife in this episode.

Pran, the philosopher that you are. I have half a mind to write about his "Nothing means nothing" to Wai regarding his relationship with Pat.

I'm not really feeling Wai here, guys. Pran asked him to not interfere, but why did he still hit Pat? Thank God that Pran, haver of all brain cells, told him to go home.

Was it only in Ep 2 that Pat wanted to meet the person who was crushing on him on the rooftop? We sure came a long way from there.

Pat is very open about his feelings. He doesn't know why he is feeling what he is feeling, but he still is trying to explain them to Pran.

If we're not enemies, do you think we can be friends? Why? Do you want us to be friends? No.

Can I get this etched onto my soul? Please and thank you.

THE KISS. God, the emotional weight it carried!! Their reactions after they part from the kiss are very telling—Pat has a smile on his face, and Pran is crying and not with joy. After Pran leaves him alone on the rooftop, I think it dawned on Pat as to what all just happened.

Side note on jealousy vs. envy:

Jealousy: to get upset and angry because someone you love seems interested in another person. Envy: to wish that you had something that another person has.

Pat is jealous when he sees Pran and Wai together. Pran, on the other hand, was envious of the person who was on the receiving end of Pat's affections. Jealousy wasn't what Pran had experienced till now when it came to Pat, because he never imagined that he had a chance with him. This is where we see the differences in their personalities and the reason for Pran, with tears down his cheeks, leaving Pat behind on the rooftop after their kiss. Pran has made peace with the fact that he'll be a yearner forever where Pat is concerned. Pat, my beloved, is a bit impulsive and wants to throw caution to the wind and see where things land, unlike Pran, who is a planner and enjoys structure and order in his life. Just because Pran had feelings for Pat for all these years doesn't mean that he thought about how he would deal with them if they were reciprocated. Classic yearner mindset!!

Tagging the usual suspects: @shortpplfedup, @incandescentflower, @starryalpacasstuff, @7nessasaryevils, @greenteadumplings, @grapejuicegay, @madworld-bbs, @usodeshou. If anyone wishes to be tagged in the future, let me know.

[idkanymark]

[Nothing can k*ll me like you do]

haechan x f!reader | jisung x f!reader | toxic relationships

INTRO: There are people who break you without ever laying a hand on you, people whose words and presence twist your heart until it bleeds, even when you try to run away. You were never supposed to go back, never supposed to fall for the same poison twice. But here you are, tangled in the same web, with no escape in sight.

Haechan was the first. The one who taught you that love can feel like a cage, no matter how sweet the promises. He pulled you in with a smile, and you thought you were strong enough to break free. You were wrong.

Then came Jisung, the calm after the storm. Or at least, that’s how he seemed—until the storm came back, and you couldn’t outrun it.

You promised yourself you wouldn’t fall again, but some promises were always meant to be broken. And now, you're struck between two men, both of whom have a hold on you jn ways you can’t explain.

Maybe it’s true what they say: nothing can kill me like you do.

warnings. toxic relationship, abus*d mentioned

Words count: 4.1k

Playlist:

Poison by Rita Ora

Back to you by Selena Gomez

Two years Rosé

-------------

<<I’m going to Japan for a while, you know what that means, right sweetheart?>>

His words were velvet laced with steel, soft but cutting. Sweetheart. The way he said it made your stomach churn—it was a nickname meant to tether you, not out of love, but control. He left. Of course, he left again.

He’s situationship!Haechan. The boy who couldn’t commit to you but refused to let you go. His hold on you was invisible but unshakable, like chains made of smoke. Every time he walked out, you told yourself it would be the last. And every time, you found yourself waiting for the sound of his footsteps coming back.

He had too many things to do—things infinitely more important than you. You were the only thing he could throw away, the only thing in his life without permanence. You were the disposable piece in his perfectly chaotic puzzle, the one thing that could be picked up and put down without consequence. You should’ve known better by now. You don’t even understand why it still caught you off guard, why the ache in your chest always felt new.

You felt alone. You always felt alone.

But somehow, you couldn’t stay away from him. It didn’t matter how much it hurt when he left or how hollow his affection felt when he was near. You always went back. Because he was the first person you ever loved.

Love.

Who knows if he even understood what love truly meant? Every time he said the words—I love you—you wanted so badly to believe them. For two years, you clung to those words like a lifeline, even when they felt like poison, pouring from his mouth and seeping into your veins.

Sweet poison. The kind that numbed the pain just enough to keep you craving more. You held onto those words, even as they left scars you couldn’t hide—a sweet, addictive toxin that took root in your heart and made you crave him, even when you knew he was no good for you.

Poison. That’s what his love was.

You hated yourself for it, for being so weak, for letting him have this much power over you. But no matter how far you tried to run from him—physically, emotionally—you always found your way back. He was a magnet, pulling you into his orbit no matter how much it hurt to stay there.

And yet, here you were. Waiting.

The tears blurred your vision, but you didn’t let them fall. Crying wouldn’t change anything; it never did.

You knew he’d come back. He always did. But not because he cared—not the way you wanted him to. He’d come back because he needed something from you. Comfort. Validation. A break from the chaos of his life.

And you’d give it to him, wouldn’t you?

Because, deep down, you still loved him.

He wasn’t your safe place—he was the fire you couldn’t stop running into, the storm you willingly stood in. You loved him with a desperation that bordered on self-destruction. And he knew it.

Haechan always knew how to keep you tethered, dangling just close enough to feel wanted but never enough to feel whole. He fed you scraps of affection, just enough to keep you addicted. You told yourself it wasn’t love—that love couldn’t possibly hurt this much—but it was the only word you knew to describe what you felt.

And maybe that’s why you let him leave so easily every time. Because deep down, you knew he’d come back. He couldn’t stay away, just like you couldn’t let him go.

It was a vicious cycle. One neither of you knew how to break.

<<Fuck>>

You muttered under your breath, glaring at the vending machine as it refused to cooperate. Of all days, it had to choose today to malfunction—the one day you desperately needed your banana milk fix to soothe the chaos in your mind.

The machine beeped mockingly, but no drink emerged. You hit the side of it lightly, more out of frustration than hope.

<<Here, I bought extras. You can have one.>>

Startled, you turned to see a boy holding out a bottle of banana milk. He looked a little shy, his eyes warm and gentle, like the kind of guy who’d lend a hand without a second thought. He was tall, with soft features that made him seem approachable, almost boyish.

<<Oh, uhm, thanks.>>

Normally, you wouldn’t take a random offering from a stranger. But today wasn’t normal. Today was heavy, suffocating—the day Haechan was leaving. The thought churned in your stomach, adding to the weight pressing on your chest. Against your better judgment, you reached out and took the bottle.

<<Can I ask for your name?>> he asked hesitantly, almost like he wasn’t sure he should. His voice was soft, unassuming.

<<Y/N. Third year of business>> you replied, still holding the bottle, unsure why you hadn’t walked away yet.

His lips curled into a small, nervous smile. <<Nice to meet you, Y/N. I’m Park Jisung. I’m in my second year of business >>

You nodded, offering a faint, polite smile in return. The exchange felt oddly significant, though you couldn’t explain why. Maybe it was because someone, even a stranger, had cared enough to notice you on a day when you felt invisible—when your mind was consumed with the thought of Haechan’s departure.

If someone had told you in that moment that Park Jisung would become a part of your life, you would’ve laughed it off. And if they’d told you that this seemingly kind boy would lead you into a relationship even more toxic than the one you were trying to escape, you wouldn’t have believed them.

But life has a funny way of surprising you—twisting kindness into something cruel, turning strangers into bittersweet memories.

You didn’t know it yet, but meeting Jisung was just the beginning of a new kind of chaos, a storm that would take you in its grip before you even realized you were caught.

For now, though, all you saw was a quiet boy offering you a simple act of kindness. And for a fleeting moment, you let yourself think it meant something more.

---

Months had passed, and your relationship with Jisung was... different. Amazing, even. He was the sweetest guy you had ever been with, and he treated you like you desperately wanted to be treated. For once, you felt seen—truly seen. In his eyes, you were more than just someone to keep around when it was convenient. You were his girlfriend. And despite how new this whole "girlfriend" situation was to you, Jisung was patient. He understood the struggle you faced in unlearning toxic patterns and figuring out what it meant to be loved in a healthy way. He taught you, slowly but surely, that love could be soft, steady, and unconditional.

The first time you met his friends, the "Dreamies", you were a little hesitant. You had always been so focused on your own little world—Haechan's world—that you didn't really care about anyone else. But Jisung made you feel welcome. His friends were fun, quirky, and much more laid-back than you expected. They were popular on campus, but they didn’t care about that; they were just a close-knit group, full of laughter and inside jokes. You didn’t know much about them at first, but as you got to know them, you realized how genuine and kind they all were, each one different from the people you’d once surrounded yourself with.

The best part was that Jisung made you feel like you belonged. He was always there, offering you support in ways you didn’t even know you needed. Whether it was a simple touch on your back when you were stressed or a shared quiet moment on the couch, he made you feel like you were finally safe. The cage you had been living in, built by your past with Haechan, was slowly breaking apart, piece by piece.

But deep down, you knew it wouldn’t last forever. Haechan always came back.

And when he did, it was just as chaotic as you had imagined.

You were walking toward Jisung, your thoughts occupied with the quiet comfort he always provided. The warmth of his presence, the ease with which he made you feel safe—everything about him was different from the chaos you had known with Haechan.

It started with a voice. A familiar one that made you freeze in your tracks. That voice, sharp and mocking, sliced through the air like a knife.

<<So you get behind my back as a revenge, sweetheart?>>

You froze in your tracks. Your heart skipped, and your breath caught in your throat. There he was. Haechan.

You hadn’t seen him in months, but the moment he spoke, it was as though time had rewound. All the walls you’d carefully built around your heart started to crumble. You didn’t even want to turn around, but your body betrayed you, forcing you to meet his gaze.

You tried to walk past him, to keep going toward Jisung, but Haechan’s presence was a force you couldn’t easily ignore. His eyes—dark, possessive, as always—locked onto you. You felt them like a weight, pressing down, pulling at your resolve.

Haechan wasn’t good at letting go. You knew that. It had always been this way with him—he’d leave, then return, as if you were something he could come back to when it suited him. And, despite everything, you knew it was only a matter of time before he came back to claim what he thought was his.

But this time, you weren’t the same person. Or, at least, you weren’t supposed to be.

You tried to ignore him but he stopped you, grabbing your wrist with a grip that felt like it could break you.

<<You really decided to choose the easiest target in my friend group?>> Haechan’s voice was cold, sharp. His eyes flicked to Jisung, who was sitting nearby. You could feel the resentment rolling off of him as he looked at your boyfriend. Haechan didn’t like seeing you with someone else. And he sure as hell didn’t like seeing you move on.

<<Haechan, please... let go of me>> you whispered, trying to gently pull away, but his grip was unyielding.

That’s when Jisung’s calm voice reached you, clear and firm.

<<Is there a problem?>>

The moment Jisung spoke, the air shifted. Haechan’s gaze snapped over to him, his expression hardening. There was a brief, tense silence before Haechan finally let go, though not without giving you one last, lingering look. It was the same look you’d seen so many times before—the look that had once pulled you back, the look full of promises, both spoken and unspoken.

You could feel your heart race, the tightness in your chest from the weight of that look. But you didn’t let it consume you. Instead, you moved closer to Jisung, letting your fingers brush against his. The simple contact grounded you, reminded you that this was your choice now.

<<No, baby>> you whispered, glancing up at Jisung. The warmth in his eyes made you feel safe, secure. He didn’t have to say anything for you to know he was here to protect you, to keep you safe from the past that was still trying to pull you back in.

Haechan scoffed, his voice dripping with bitterness. <<He’s your boyfriend, but you’re still the same, Y/N. You always will be>>

Jisung didn’t flinch. His gaze never left you. He didn’t even spare Haechan a second glance. His attention was completely on you—on the subtle way you tensed in his presence, on the slight tremble in your hand as you reached out for his. He could see it. He could see the way Haechan still had a hold on you, how you were still torn between two worlds.

His hand moved to the small of your back, a soft but firm gesture, as though silently reminding you that you were safe with him—that you didn’t have to go back to what was broken.

But you knew the truth. This wasn’t just about a confrontation between two people. It was about the scars Haechan had left, the damage that still lingered in your chest. And the more you stood there with Jisung by your side, the more you realized that the past had to stay there, in the past, where it belonged.

You weren’t that person anymore. You wouldn’t let him pull you back in.

As Jisung stood next to you, calm but with a tension in his body that mirrored your own, you could feel the weight of Haechan’s gaze on you, still trying to pull you into his web. But you refused. This time, you wouldn’t let him have that power over you.

Jisung, though, knew. He understood that Haechan wasn’t just someone from your past—he was a shadow that threatened to swallow your future if you weren’t careful. And for the first time, Jisung wasn’t just concerned with losing you to someone else. He was afraid that you might lose yourself to the past, to a version of you that was twisted by love and manipulation.

He could see the way you glanced back toward Haechan, the tension that still gripped your shoulders. But Jisung wasn’t going to let you slip away.

And as the moments stretched out, the realization began to settle in. Haechan wasn’t just a man from your past—he was the past you needed to let go of, if you wanted any chance at healing. Jisung—your present—was the one who could help you rebuild. Even if it meant fighting against everything that had torn you down before.

Or at least, Jisung thought he was your person, he desperately wanted to be your person.

----

From that day on, it was a constant back-and-forth between the three of you. Haechan always found a way to come back, to reclaim what he thought was his, pulling you back into his web like the pied piper leading you toward destruction. And Jisung, who once seemed like the sweetest guy next door, slowly began to change. You knew, deep down, it was your fault.

The way you kept going back to Haechan, even after you promised yourself—and Jisung—that you wouldn’t, creating cracks in the foundation of whatever you and Jisung had built. At first, he was understanding, and patient. He listened when you cried, waited when you pulled away, and forgave when you stumbled. But even the kindest hearts have limits.

Jisung began to harden. His quiet warmth turned cold, his gentle touches grew tense, and the boy who once gave you banana milk with a shy smile now gave you silence laced with resentment. The cracks became fissures, and soon enough, he wasn’t the same boy you’d met that day by the vending machine.

It all came to a head the day Jisung decided to marry you.

He thought that maybe, just maybe, a ring on your finger would make you stop running back to Haechan. That it would anchor you to him, tie you to a promise you couldn’t break. He wanted to believe that he was enough to make you stay.

But it didn’t, it only made things worse. The weight of his expectations, his growing frustration, and your inability to let go of Haechan created a storm neither of you could escape. The once-soft love he offered became sharp, laced with bitterness and possessiveness. He didn’t trust you anymore, and you didn’t blame him.

You tried to love him the way he deserved, but your heart was fractured, pieces of it still caught in Haechan’s grasp. And every time you faltered, Jisung sank deeper into the toxicity that had become your relationship.

<<Do you really want to marry him?>> Haechan’s voice echoed in your mind, cutting through the haze of your thoughts.

<<Haechan, please... I can’t do this anymore>> You couldn’t stop the tears from falling, even though you knew better than to cry in front of him.

<<So, to get over me, you want to marry him?>> He said it like he didn’t understand, but you knew better. He knew exactly how this would play out. He always did. He reached out, fingers threading through your hair with a tenderness that felt too familiar.

<<I would do anything and everything to get over you>> you whispered, your voice breaking as the weight of your own words hit you.

<<Oh, sweetheart>> Haechan’s voice softened with a mocking sadness. <<You need someone twisted to keep you. Otherwise, you'll run away>>

And he was right.

Jisung had begun to change in ways you hadn’t expected. He saw the way you still let Haechan worm his way into your heart. He saw you pulling away from him, always reaching for someone who didn’t want you the same way he did. So Jisung did the only thing he knew—he twisted himself.

You turned the nicest guy into the most toxic one. He started to become possessive, and distant. His eyes, once soft and full of warmth, began to harden. His affection turned into control, his care became an obsession. The jealousy that simmered in his chest boiled over, turning him into someone you barely recognized. It started slowly, with small comments, things that made you feel suffocated.

But soon, it wasn’t just the words. It was his actions. The way he gripped your wrist too tightly when you tried to walk away, the way he would get angry when you spoke to anyone else, even a passing acquaintance, the way his fingers tightened when you reached for your phone. The kindness that had once radiated from him was replaced with a jealousy that had festered too long. It wasn’t just in the way he looked at you anymore, but in the way he treated you—rough, sharp, demanding.

In bed or out of it, Jisung wasn’t the same boy who had once shyly offered you a drink. He was someone darker, more dangerous, someone who wanted control over every inch of you. Every time you tried to pull away, he pulled you back harder. Every time you tried to breathe, he smothered you with his need to possess you.

And yet, somehow, you stayed.

The ring hadn’t fixed anything. If anything, it made it worse. The more Jisung tried to tether you to him, the more you realized that the chains you’d placed on your heart were only growing tighter. You couldn’t escape. And you didn’t want to. Not really.

The cycle of toxicity had been set in motion the moment you let Haechan go and let Jisung in. But it wasn’t really about Jisung or Haechan anymore. It was about you. The choices you made, the heart you couldn’t let go of. You couldn’t fix them, and they couldn’t fix you.

And now, the pieces were shattered beyond repair.

-----

-----

[IN CASE YOU WANT A DIFFERENT ENDING:

The night before the wedding.

You stood in front of the mirror, staring at the reflection of the woman who had been torn apart by promises and lies. The wedding dress hung in front of you, a symbol of everything you thought you wanted, everything you thought would fix what had been broken. But in your heart, you knew nothing could fix this.

Not the wedding. Not the baby. Not Jisung’s unyielding belief that he was the father, or Haechan’s constant reminders that you were his. They had both clawed their way into your life, suffocating you with their demands, with their manipulations, until you couldn’t breathe without feeling guilty, without feeling like you were trapped between two worlds.

You had promised yourself you'd break free. But every time you tried, you ended up right back where you started—tangled in their webs, suffocating under the weight of their expectations. And now, with a baby growing inside you, everything was more complicated. You didn't even know who the father was, but both Jisung and Haechan had claimed it as their own, their constant pestering and demands driving you even further into a cage of their making.

Jisung’s patience had worn thin. He was convinced, as always, that marrying him would fix everything, that you would be his anchor, that you would finally be the person he always wanted you to be. He didn't care that you were fractured, broken in ways he couldn't understand. He just wanted the life he had imagined, the life where everything was perfect, where you were perfect.

And Haechan—he never stopped. His presence, his possessiveness, his constant belief that you were his, that you belonged to him, had wrapped around you like a vine, pulling you back every time you tried to escape. The way he always knew exactly what to say to make you question yourself, to make you second-guess the path you were on. The way he would remind you that you would never be free from him, no matter how hard you tried.

But tonight, in the silence of your room, as you stared at your reflection, you realized something: you had been living in their shadows for too long. You had let them decide your worth. You had let them determine your happiness. You had let them shape your future, and now, you couldn’t even remember who you were before they found you.

Jisung still believed it was his child. Haechan still believed it was his. And you? You didn’t even know. You didn’t know who the father was, but you knew this life wasn’t yours anymore. You couldn’t keep pretending that everything was fine. You couldn’t keep pretending that this marriage, this baby, this life was what you had wanted.

A knock at the door.

You knew it was Jisung. He’d been waiting for you, just outside, desperate for you to come to him. But you couldn’t. Not like this. Not anymore.

With a shaky breath, you grabbed your phone and texted him: I can’t do this anymore. I’m sorry.

The tears you’d been holding back finally spilled over as you stood up and grabbed your bag. The weight of the life you had built with Jisung—now a lie—pressed down on you. The weight of the past with Haechan, now tangled into your every decision, made your chest feel like it was caving in. You had let them both control your life, and now you needed to break free.

You called an Uber, as your heart pounded in your chest. You didn’t know where you were going. You didn’t know if you’d ever be able to piece your life back together. But you knew this was the only choice left.

As the car pulled away from the apartment, you stared out the window, your heart aching. You couldn’t fix everything. You couldn’t undo the damage that had been done. But you could leave. You could finally choose yourself.

The baby inside you was a constant reminder of the mess you had made, but it wasn’t going to be your cage anymore. You didn’t know who the father was, and maybe it didn’t matter anymore. What mattered was that you were choosing your freedom, your future, even if it was terrifying, even if you didn’t have all the answers.

When the car stopped, you paid the driver and stepped out onto the unfamiliar street. The world felt too big, too overwhelming, but for the first time in years, you felt a sliver of peace.

You weren’t sure what the future held. You weren’t sure how everything would turn out. But for once, you were free.

And that was all you needed.

[blueishspace]

Hero, Villain God 40

(Prev) (Next) (First)

*Grian's pov*

Pearl is the one to open the door and let you in, as you walk inside her apartment you see Martyn and Cleo are already on the couch while Scott seems to be preparing some ..food? You can't really tell what it is but you have to assume It's some kind of snack.

"Finally, we were waiting for you guys for a while now... Pick a spot on the couch while I go set up the first movie"

"That sounds good... ...so, what movie's first?"

Scott perks up at that, you can guess It's probably one of his, either that or he's just really excitedby the idea of watching movies in general.

It was the former, it is one of his, you feel very smug for something that is completely unimportant.

Mean girls is a pretty strong start for this whole marathon thing, you didn't expect a story about mortal highschoolers to be even remotely close to being entertaining but you aren't going to lie... it was actually pretty good.

Scar had never seen it either so you weren't even the odd one out... Also the main "mean girl" character got run over by a bus at one point which actually made you laugh. More chaos! Yeah! Exactly what you want!

... Unfortunately also run out of snacks because Martyn finished them so now you have to wait to get more before the next movie.

The second movie is the one Martyn chose and that Scott seems to be insulted by, the lego batman one... The main problem you don't know what either lego or Batman are so...

"What is Lego?"

Scar whips around so fast you are surprised he didn't snap his neck in the process...

"You don't know what lego is???"

"Nope"

"Pearl told us it was bad but I didn't think it was this bad..." Scott chimes in from the kitchen.

Pearl for once decides to be helpful and explain. "It's a type of toy, plastic blocks that can be connected to build structures and scenes...this movie is going to mostly use a similiar style."

"I see! ... What's a batman?"

So, apparently Batman is a vigilante/hero from some comics that is "super famous" and "known even by non comic fans"... Watching a movie about super heroes. And super villains is pretty ironic considering your situation as both...

As for the movie, definitely fits your brand, It's 1) fun and 2) you don't understand what's going on for half of it. Perfect chaos...though that's mostly because you don't get the references. Still you have... fun, like... genuine entertainment even. There's also at one point a part where the clown guy summons other villains and the room just devolves into you asking who someone is, one of the others being appalled, an explanation and repeat...

After a small break It's time for Cleo's pick, she prefaces to you that's the film is in stop motion and this time you don't have to ask because you already know what that means! From one of the documentaries you watched with Mumbo! You didn't think you would ever gain something from them... something to keep in mind...maybe... probably not.

The movie is definitely different from the other two. On one hand nobody is hit by a bus, on the other you got a song about kidnapping Santa so...

The movie follows what you can only assume to be an halloween deity considering the whole holiday lands thing is strangely similiar to the divine planes you and Pearl and the other gods share. You also know that It's probably not the way the others are interpreting it, or even how It's supposed to be interpreted for that matter...still, it ends up being the movie with the protagonist that's the most relatable to you. Yes, the one about the talking skeleton copying christmas...wonder what that says about you.

This time Pearl doesn't go to set up the next movie.

"Ok, time for a break. We already watched three movies in a row and I'm sure some of you need to go to the bathroom"

That's fair, you don't but the mortals might... As the room devolves into chatter you slowly tune in mentally into what's happening with you...other you... Mother Spore.

[manchestereyes]

it is you

summary: @/danisnotonfire: I wonder how biology can explain the physical pain you feel in your chest when all you want to do is be with someone D:

When Dan gets permission to spend a week with Phil in December, he has a stunning realisation.

rating: T

word count: 2.1k

tags: 2009, fluff, light angst, skype, falling in love

notes: written for the 2024 @phandomgiftexchange for @someone-stole-all-my-fruit! I hope you're having a wonderful holiday season! <3 2009 phan is always such a joy to write, so thank you so much for this lovely prompt!

Read on ao3

@/danisnotonfire: I wonder how biology can explain the physical pain you feel in your chest when all you want to do is be with someone D:

***

It’s not fair .

It’s so incredibly unfair, Dan thinks, that he should have to suffer this much when he’s already dealt with so much bullshit in his life. Why can’t Phil be right here? Or better yet, why can’t he be with Phil, far away in Manchester where reality can’t touch him?

Well. He knows the answer to that second question. But knowing doesn’t help the situation at all. Maybe that’s why his heart squeezes again when he glances back at the selfie Phil’s just sent him. Really, those puppy eyes should be illegal. It’s sure as hell making Dan want to do something that could land him in prison anyway…

His eyes flick back to the text he just sent, heart squeezing all over again at the insanity of it all. He should be happy he (barely) got permission to stay at Phil’s for a whole week, right? His mum’s breezy “Yeah, go ahead” shouldn’t be affecting him this much. It’s just how she is. Dan should know this after eighteen God-awful years.

And yet. And yet. After meeting Phil’s mum and dad last weekend, Dan can’t help but feel that old cavernous hole rip open anew. How come Phil got the perfect family and Dan ended up with his sorry excuse for a mum and dad who barely noticed if he was there or not? Sure, Phil’s regaled his own problems, how he doesn’t feel like he could ever come out to them, but Dan would still take a cordless hammer drill over the shouting that fills his sleepless nights. At least Phil’s parents actually like each other.

More than that, they like Phil. Dan knows he wasn’t planned, that he had thrown a baby-sized wrench into their world travel dreams. He can’t count how many times his dad had hurled those words at him when Dan fucked something up in the way only he can. 

Dan can’t remember the last time they looked at him with pride in their eyes. Meanwhile, Phil’s mum had greeted him with a hug that told Dan immediately where Phil had gotten his irresistible cuddle skills from.

His phone buzzes again then, a beam of light through his dark thoughts.

Phil: A week!!! I know it wasn’t the reaction u wanted but Dan we get a whole damn week together!

Ok, yeah. That was a pretty big thing to look forward to. Even if it still blows Dan’s mind that Phil wants to see him. Maybe that’s what pushes him to reply, despite the overwhelming pain weighing him down.

Dan: ur not gonna get tired of me before the end of it?

(He’s not being pathetic, he swears. It’s just all he can think about right now.)

Phil: Dan!!! Don’t ever say that plz. I could never get tired of u <3

And there it is. Seven little words, one emoticon. And somehow it means more to Dan than he could ever express. A smile crawls up his face before he can bite it back. (Not that he wants to.)

Dan: <3 thank u phil. i think i needed to hear that tonight

Dan sends the text before he can think twice about it. If these last few weeks are anything to go by, he shouldn’t have anything to worry about. Yet there’s still a voice screaming at him that it’s too much, that Phil doesn’t actually want to hear about all of Dan’s issues, that he’s just like his schoolmates…

Phil: Then I’ll say it a million times as much as u need. U really are the coolest person I’ve ever known. I can’t believe u wanna be with me tbh

Dan: rly? ur not just saying that?

Phil: Really honestly and truly. You’ve gone to reading festival when I still get stressed at youtube gatherings. You were a world of warcraft kid when I could barely tell my friends I liked buffy. I wish I had even a bit of ur confidence some days :3

Dan: rly? but u were in faintheart and the weakest link and you’ve been on youtube for years when i was almost too terrified to post my first video

Phil: So was I! But that’s the thing, Dan. I did those things scared shitless and they haven’t gotten any easier. I think u know by now that internet Phil and real Phil are entirely different people, yeah?

Dan: hmmmm ok. hey speaking of real phil can we continue this on skype?

No sooner had Dan sent the message than his laptop bleated with the old familiar ringtone. Like a figment from his wildest dreams, Phil’s pixelated face fills his screen in seconds, his positively giddy smile sparking a matching grin of Dan’s own.

“Really Dan, I can’t believe we get to have a whole week together!!” Phil claps his hands and his frame grows blurry for a few seconds. Dan can only guess he’s bouncing on his bed and his eyes squeeze shut at the adorableness of it all.

Yet a hint of that darkness still lingers, drawing bars across Dan’s heart. “I’m just glad to get away from here for a while,” he sighs. Then, hoping to erase the pout that appears on Phil’s face, he adds, “And to see you, obviously!”

Phil sticks his tongue out in response, the frame jiggling as his face comes closer until his ocean eyes take up half the screen. Dan is surprised to find his voice growing serious. “Dan. You know you can talk about anything with me. It kills me to know how rough you’ve had it. I wish I could’ve been there before but, well, I’m here now at least? And maybe that counts for something?”

“Phil.” Suddenly, Dan’s shifting his laptop onto his propped-up knees, pulling it closer and wishing more than anything that he could jump through the computer screen and into Phil’s arms And maybe it’s the pain in Phil’s eyes, a pain Dan’s felt a thousand times worse yet would do anything to prevent Phil from feeling, maybe it’s the hope in Phil’s voice--something melts away any of the trepidation he had before. 

“Phil, are you kidding?” Dan bursts out. “Of course it counts! I mean, I think it’s safe to say we’re best friends now, and isn’t that what best friends do?”

“I mean… I would hope we’re a little more than best friends by now?” And good lord, the smirk that crawls up Phil’s face and fills the bottom of the screen should be illegal. It’s so much that Dan has to tear his eyes away from the screen and stare at his tiny TV and dresser for a minute.

Not for the first time, it hits him that he’s really here , speaking to Phil in the very room where he spent countless hours watching that same man. How many times has he dreamed of kissing him, of holding him, of dancing through the streets of Manchester? How long has his heart ached for someone to ease its burden? And now… that someone is here, giggling from his laptop speakers and fulfilling every one of Dan’s hopes and dreams far better than Dan ever thought possible. 

It should be too good to be true. And yet, after everything he’s been through, doesn’t he deserve this one good thing?

They’re both silent for a few seconds until Phil asks softly, “Dan? What are you thinking about right now?”

“Oh, I dunno.” Dan picks up the bear he’s had his entire life from the nightstand and strokes its ears absentmindedly, something he’s always done when he’s nervous. When he speaks again, he chooses his next words carefully. “Lots of things, I guess. It’s just wild that… well, you know how long I’ve watched your videos. I don’t know if I’ve ever had a best friend. Not until now. Not until you.” A blush rises in Dan’s cheeks then, but he means every word.

“Dan. I mean, I had kind of picked some of that up, but are you sure?” Phil’s voice is just as soft as Dan’s, almost reverent. And yet some nasty part of Dan’s brain expects to see those blue eyes darken when he whispers “Well, yeah” in response. Surely this was too much. Surely Dan was too much for Phil, like he was for everyone. Surely Phil was about to…

Melt into the purest smile Dan’s ever seen from him? “Oh my God, I--I feel the exact same way.” Dan is shocked to find Phil’s next words tinged with relief. “I think you know how I always had the same group of friends through school, right?” Dan nods. “Well, they’re all great, but I… never felt as close to any of them as I do with you. I never felt like they got me, you know? And then you come along in my Twitter replies and suddenly you’re the only person I ever want to talk to. And somehow, you want to talk to me too? I feel like I’ve won the lottery here.”

Dan wants to take those words and lock them up in a box that only he can touch. Never in his eighteen years did he ever think he’d hear something like this. He’d barely even let himself hope for it. His heart squeezes to a point where he knows he won’t forget this moment, not as long as he has Phil. It’s a perfect moment he so deeply wants to live in forever.

So is it any wonder his voice catches and tears prick his eyes when he finally finds the strength to speak? “Really? God, I had no idea. And here I thought you had this perfect amazing life, all because your parents clearly lo--clearly care about you so much and you’ve had the same group of friends pretty much forever. I don’t know what that’s like.”

Dan can’t say why he freezes up at the word love just then. He’s just discussing Phil’s relationship with his parents, not declaring his love for Phil. Right?

Wait, does he love Phil? The rapid pace of his heart and the smile fighting to break through his face tell him yes, yes, a thousand times yes but he can’t say that here. Not on Skype. Not when there’s 300 kilometres separating him from Phil’s arms. He just has to keep his heart locked tight until their week together.

Of course Phil’s response makes that impossibly difficult. “Dan. Fuck, you don’t know how much I wish you knew how that feels.” The ache in his voice combined with his anxious fringe tugging has Dan squeezing his bear with everything he has in him just to expel some of his overwhelming feelings. 

“And sure, my parents are great and all, but I feel like they don’t get me. My mum still thinks the movies and things I’ve done are just a fun little hobby that can’t lead to anything. She doesn’t understand why I’m travelling to Ireland every other weekend, and my dad keeps telling me about these boring jobs I don’t want. I wanna see what else I can do with this YouTube thing, but it might not lead to anything. And then I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

By now, the tears have broken free and are streaming down Dan’s face. He doesn’t know exactly why, but he has a feeling they have something to do with the fear trapped in Phil’s eyes.

And yet, they’re not only sad tears. Sure, Dan’s heart is breaking just a bit for the boy on his screen, but it’s also light and airy for the first time since he was a tiny child. That’s when it hits him.

This light, airy, snuggly feeling-- it’s safety . Here in this tiny bubble with Phil, Dan feels safe. It’s unfamiliar, sure, but it’s not scary. He’ll be okay, as long as he has Phil.

It’s this thought that he holds tightly onto over the next few years. Even when the walls are closing in on him and Dan can barely breathe, Phil is always there--in his phone, across Manchester, and soon across the hall. 

Even when he’s sure he can’t feel any worse, he’ll be okay one day. Because he has Phil. And in the moments Phil’s heart shatters hard enough for the both of them, Dan is right there with cuddles and sweets and whispered words of comfort, whatever Phil needs in that moment. Because they’re Dan and Phil. And whatever they go through, they’ll go through it together.

If only eighteen-year-old Dan could see how well things would turn out. Yet as Dan thinks back on this moment fifteen years later, he thinks some part of him did know in a strange way. So much has changed, yet Dan is still that bright-eyed little boy with a dream at his core. And he still has Phil by his side.

[ultimate-marysue]

I’m hoping you can answer a question for me. I need a Jason Todd expert, and you seem like one.

I’ve seen two big posts recently. One argued that Jason and Tim can’t stand each other, don’t trust each other, and can barely work together (if at all). The other says that in the new canon, Jason and Tim are basically best friends, and Tim is Jason’s favourite sibling. Both posts cited a bunch of different runs and authors/artists, and called the other side misinformed.

So, I ask you: what is the actual relationship between Jason Todd and Tim Drake? Are they close friends and brothers, friendly/neutral acquaintances, or enemies?

I hope you can answer me, or if not point me in the direction of somebody who can. Thanks!

Hey! I wouldn't call myself the Jason expert (that's @glitter-stained ) but I'm currently writing a fic about the relationship between these two so I feel like I can explain the two conflicting versions.

The most important take away is: people are really unhappy with current canon for a variety of reasons, one of the most notable ones being Jason's writing in general (RHATO specifically). This means canon has lost a lot of power after New 52 because characters act, well, out of character and fans point out how it doesn't make sense.

As for canon: yes, they are good siblings that get along pretty well with varying degrees of sassiness depending on the run. This happens after Jason "makes amends" with the family at some undisclosed time in new 52. This new canon is way more wholesome and it shows the members of the family getting along way better than their pre-New 52 counterparts ever did. My favorite comic depicting this good relationship is Knight Terrors: Robin, but the most canon option is RHATO (which has plenty of moments between the two) as pictured below or even Chip Zdarsky's Batman run where everyone gets along pretty well.

So, it's canon right? Yes, but what is canon if fans don't accept it? The first thing I said is how people are dissatisfied with New 52 and RHATO specifically, which happen to be where the examples of these two getting along come from. I'm not going to get into why they think Jason or Tim are out of character cause that's its own post, but in the relationship between them it's pretty easy to point out: it's just not earned.

Tim and Jason have genuine gripes with one another and opposing morals most times. We don't get to see a moment where post Red Robin, Tim decides maybe sometimes killing is the answer, even if not for him. We don't get to see him learn that Jason wasn't an idiot disobeying Batman and that he was tricked by his mother. Jason doesn't know about Tim's 16th birthday and thus assumes that he just blindly idolizes Batman. He thinks his Robin run was just like his own and doesn't understand just how much shit Bruce put him through, thus assuming he's a bit spoiled.

Fans don't think either of these characters could just turn around and suddenly start liking each other the second Jason gets admitted into the family (something that also happens without much of an actual explanation?? At least not a satisfying one). It's not even that they necessarily have a personal vendetta (at least not Jason, and Tim is a very forgiving character), so it's not something out of the picture. A lot of their problems with each other stem from Bruce and his teachings and the language around Jason after his death.

In conclusion: it's not like the characters can't overcome their differences and come to find friendship or siblinghood in one another, it's more so that it requires more development. This has always been DC's weakest point, relationships and characters changing suddenly to suit a new direction disregarding their actual personality and values. So, it is canon, but a lot of people argue it shouldn't count if characters don't behave like themselves. There's a dissonance between the original characters and their current iterations that has not been bridged with character development.

But by all means, it is actually canon! People just have genuine gripes with how current canon disregards the previous canon. It's like getting attached to a character but suddenly it becomes this unrecognizable caricature that has barely anything to do with the OG but you're meant to acknowledge it as the same person. So, yeah, fans aren't happy, but I guess everyone gets along now.

Again, not a lore expert, but I hope I could explain why you could find two post with plenty of evidence arguing for opposing points.

[planetsandmagic]

catch of the day

[findafight]

Robin chose Steve. Robin made the conscious and deliberate decision that she could and would trust Steve. She already liked him! She had fun working and bantering with him! They were already on their way to being weird little bffs and the torture just expedited the process. Steve chose Robin just the same! He thinks she's fun and cool and likes her so much! He chose to be honest and open with her too, putting himself out there.

Even though their interests on the surface level don't match why wouldn't they share them? Steve clearly caves when Robin wants to watch a movie he doesn't think he'll like, Robin can watch a March madness game or five.

Stop trying to take away their bond oh my god people can be close to more than one person!!! Their best friend doesn't have to be dismissive or mean or whatever in order for a romance to be special to them!

[silverwhittlingknife]

can we have a hint about what the spring break tim patrol chapter of red letter day contains? (you kept having dick say "if the joker shows up" and tim's "he won't." for me to be convinced that goes off without any trouble)

i'm sure it'll be fine. :D

i am delighted you're enjoying the story <333 i haven't updated it in soooo long but i got some very sweet comments lately so i have been looking at my scribbles again <3

[p1harmonie]

I JUST REWATCHED PIWON MOVIE AND I HAVE THINGS TO SAY

[medicinemane]

Sometimes I feel like I'm going crazy

You have... very very very very very very very very smart people you know, and they're say something that not only isn't true, but literally is as opposite of the truth as it's possible to be... and you'll... gently inform them "hey, it's actually a bit more like this" and then they just kinda... go on saying literally the exact same thing

I'm not sure if it's just that... I often feel like I must be very bad at communicating, or people must just not notice/ignore a lot of what I say, but... I don't know

Like dearest friend, you've said something as absurd as... I don't know, it's hard to say without saying it, but honest to god about as absurd as saying the United States was a part of the USSR, that level of completely getting it backwards

...and it just doesn't seem to matter when I try to explain it... I legit don't even know if you read what I said

Really end up feeling like I'm going nuts sometimes