#will happen when the unhinged feel
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😂😂😂😂Wait until they realize those taxes are not gonna be the same.
#😂😂😂😂Wait until they realize those taxes are not gonna be the same.#They'll figure that shit out on Find Out Freeway 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣#😂😂😂😂😂😂they gonna kill#somebody about those taxes. Beware H&R block😂😂😂😂#I shudder to think what#will happen when the unhinged feel#abandoned by their “Daddy”.”#92percent#“We Ain’t Going!” …-Signed All Black Women 92percent#He’ll No! We won’t Go!#Absolutely not!#now what part don’t you understand ?#This is me the next 4 years#. Fuck those backstabbing people#they say that they are with us#and they vote for this 3rd grade educated unpa lumpa.#Fuck you all!#I’ll see you in 2026#I hope you suffer bad#. I’ll side eye you at the midterms#and prepare to be sick of me in 2028#There’s no protest or prayers#It’s thoughts and deportations#thoughts and consecration camps#thoughts and Gaza being the new beachfront resort#thoughts and the Palestine ppl#who’s lives you screwed#because you wanted to revenge vote#against Kamala Harris#outrage against you
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sew the mouth of your zombie wife shut, now she can't bite you
#oc#oc art#when characters do unhinged things for their lovers#good food#might be absolutely traumatizing to sew your wifes mouth shut#as her undead body struggles beneath you#you dont know if she can feel pain#you dont know if she can even feel#but you promised to love her no matter what happened to her#so you have to go through with it#thats how love is!!#tw horror#no idea what 2 tag this with#tw blood
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Google, play "Closer" by Nine Inch Nails
#alright this is the thing that will finally get me canceled JDJFKGKGKKGKG#this is for you ruby 😭 ty for sending me that pic and making me distracted the entire day#i randomly thought of this when i was walking to class and then just wanted to get home so badly#THEY'RE GONNA CELEBRATE ON THEIR OWN TOGETHER 🤭🤭#hes gonna 'tuck him in bed' again. well he'll certainly be tucking smth somewhere HDJFJGKGKLG#i feel unhinged posting this 😭😭😭#truly the power of oscarmark making me post this kinda thing#haha get it google? cause mclaren is sponsored by google???#thats their song. to me. okay#mark smilied when oscar said he had to 'hang on for dear life'#well he'll be hanging onto the bed for dea- DJFJKFGK o#its so funny cause the only time ive gotten a hate anon was after I posted a very innocuous oscarmark art#so. this is uhhhhhhh yeah#ik it's not THAT bad in the scheme of things but little teasy hinty things like this make me very insane 😭#pup. something something inherent pet play something#also yeah canonically fernando saw this happen. he knows that look in mark's eyes#oscarmark#pibber#<- i think ill only tag those cause i dont think i should put it in the main tag#catie.art.
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your mcavoy!charles is so incredibly squishable to me i just. like. the way everyone was talking about comics erik using comics charles’ waist as a stress toy? that’s how i feel about your mcavoy!charles but with literally all of him. i want to click and drag him at the corners to compress him like a photoshop layer. i want to put him in a hydraulic press and watch him pop in it. i want to melt him in my toaster oven<3 <- i am normal and can be trusted around fictional characters
hello Perfectly Normal And Hinged Xmen Fan anon sometimes people call me snap its lovely to meet you :)
#fave#snap chats#most people skip the introduction and just tell me something Unhinged And Not Normal very refreshing to have you my friend#in all seriousness fikAsksj thank you 😌 your compliments are very comprehensible and i very much appreciate them on a spiritual level#some of the best compliments are ones are the most ravenous ones so i truly feel a great honor today Thank You My Totally Hinged friend#As I Say its not a proper day unless someones unhinged and/or insane in my inbox so thank you for starting my day off right so far#i hope to draw movie charles again soon 😌 ideally he wont be in a hydraulic press but i cannot control what happens to him#i imagine when hes squeezed he makes squeaky toy noises tho .. like a dog toy …
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Total Drama Psycho Noah AU, before Alejandro knew the truth, Noah would sometimes cuddle to the charmer while sleeping... Alejandro was amused and fond by this... But when Alejandro learns about Noah's true crazy colors and the sleeping Noah cuddles into Alejandro again, Alejandro is trying NOT to freak out! 😴
Wait no you're so right. Noah's sleep cuddling habit would've been seen as innocuous throughout the whole series, especially in World Tour when their sleeping arrangements were so cramped. Of course he'd always end up practically gluing himself to the nearest person in his sleep- who would usually ended up being Owen or sometimes Alejandro, as they were the two people Noah tolerated enough to spend most of his time with.
But as soon as everyone on the jet becomes aware that he's not nearly as harmless as he's portrayed himself to be? When he intentionally shows himself to be a threat to their safety/wellbeings?
Well, suddenly his "cute little quirk" has turned into a very volatile situation.
-
What is Alejandro supposed to do when he wakes up in the Economy cabin, not even twenty four hours after the London challenge, and finds everyone's fearful eyes trained on him. How is he supposed to react when he feels the familiar weight of the dangerous, downright vicious person they'd all watched snap someone's arms like uncooked spaghetti, draped over him like a blanket?
Especially when they all know that a Noah who's woken up before he's ready is cranky. And that was the Noah from before, who was apparently keeping a tight leash on his wilder instincts- now that he's given up on holding himself back, who knows how he'd respond to being woken up?
Oh wait. They all know how he'd respond- and it involves a lot of bloodshed.
He's trapped; waking up Noah is a guaranteed death sentence, and any movement could be enough to stir the other from his precarious slumber.
And the others know it too. Tyler and Duncan watch him like a hawk, their faces palid with pity and terror, though they thankfully remain just as muted as Alejandro himself. It's unnerving, being held under the terror-shrunk gazes of the two, but not nearly as unnerving as the soft steady breathing of the deranged bookworm sleeping on top of him.
For a moment, there's a tentative silence that hovers between the three of them like a sheet of ice over a frozen lake.
So of course, Owen's boisterous entrance to the cabin shatters it.
"Hey guys, Chef's serving breakfast in the-! Oh, did I interrupt something?"
Noah stirs from his sleep, and Alejandro's breath becomes an inmate in the prison of his lungs. He'd doomed.
"Wuzza'? Is it ch'llenge time?" The bookworm slurs, one hand wiping at his sleep-crusted eyes as the other finds purchase against Alejandro's shoulder. Noah pulls himself into a sitting position, his body subconsciously curling itself towards the nearest heat source- which just so happens to be Alejandro's terror stilled form- and the Spaniard in question internally prays to whatever God is listening that he'll somehow evade the psycho's inevitable ire when he realises that Alejandro is, in fact, not a pillow.
After a trepid second of inaction, Noah hums inquisitively against the warm mass beneath him, and blinks tired eyes up towards Alejandro's ashen face. A moment of incomprehension passes. Then another. And then realisation flickers over the bookworm's features like a dying ember.
Alejandro is so fucked.
Noah's face solidifies into something blank and unreadable- the complete lack of discernible emotion in is expression is almost eldritch in its uncanniness- and the latino doesn't know if its more or less unnerving than the unhinged, crooked smile he's graced the cast with yesterday. But then, unexpectedly, Noah wordlessly slides himself off of Alejandro's lap.
No broken arms. No stab wounds. Not even a threat against his person.
...What?
"Uh. Sorry for sleeping on you, I guess." The cynic says off-handedly, in his customary sardonic drawl, before he steps over to Owen and calmly asks what the blonde oaf was so excited about.
What?!
"It... is no problem, mi amigo." Alejandro chokes out, displacing the stationary air in his lungs.
Where is the vicious psychopath from last night? Why is Noah acting so... normal? Was his display of instability a fever dream or something?
No, both Tyler and Duncan shoot Alejandro matching looks of bewilderment from their seat on the adjacent bench. What happened last night was real, regardless of Noah's current docility.
Owen and Noah's conversation filters off into nothing, and the Archvillain spares a glance towards the pair. Only to find the both of them staring back at him, grinning; Owen's face scrunching up into his usual friendly smile, and Noah's smug smirk rapidly morphing into that same too-wide snarl he'd adorned on the bus- are those fucking fangs?!
"You make a pretty good pillow, Al."
#in other words; noah notices just how scared his teammates are of him and decides to play The Waiting Game#you know that feeling when you're anticipating a jumpscare so you're just sat there being super tense? and then nothing happens?#that's what he's been going for this whole time. but now he can use it on his teammates too! how fun!#sprinkle in a few Scary Smiles™ and unhinged comments to keep them on their toes.#and THEN when everyone finally loses their paranoia he'll Do The Jumpscare.#the alternative here is noah wakes up against alejandro freaks the fuck out and crawls into the vents The Grudge style#which is the funnier option and therefore canon in my heart#total drama#psycho!noah au#alenoah crumbs?#silly ideas#replies
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Okk. I don't want to compare or anything but I don't get the people who's getting mad on Korn Tonkla scenes saying they had more screen time? Or shit. I mean tbh, I am understanding the plot of the series better because of the two of them because they are somehow related to all of the events. And Tonkla's situation is...... he somehow senses the other timeline which I think is an important role. And also, Korn! Like what you've said he knows Dome is dead, and at the same time he's with his brother who ’saved’ Dome. Both of the characters are pivotal in the series.
Also, I think that they are more talked about because a Bas and Fuaiz couple was not expected in the series, and at the same time their plot line is really good as well as the build up of their characters. And I've seen more & more people are falling in love with Fuaiz & Bas (as an actor) in this series.
But somehow, I get them because the main couple is GreatTyme but why does it feel like they are becoming more of a side couple. Also saw people saying that their ’plot line’ or how they were introduced to eo /wasn't it./
Thank you for giving me the incentive to speak about this issue, anon. I'm going to do it now because the new episode will come out in a few hours and hopefully I won't have to do this ever again - which I honestly doubt but anyway. Since I haven't seen this type of discourse pop up on Tumblr (thank GOD), I'd like to inform everyone that over on Twitter, there have been massive complaints about Tonkla, aka Fuaiz, getting more screentime than the main characters, aka JesBible, to the point of people tagging BOC in posts and demanding they give them more scenes with TymeGreat - as if BOC can just pull footage they haven't filmed out of their ass or something. It got so bad that Sammon herself saw them and AGREED with these people, further explaining how it was important for some plot elements to be explored now, in order for the rest of the series to make sense. Now, with all due respect to her position as a screenwriter: she's factually wrong here. Someone on Twitter actually sat down and counted the minutes each character is on screen and came out with these results:
It's not in English, but I believe the results are clear: Tonkla doesn't even come close to Great's screentime. He's a little closer to Tyme's, but the main character is Great, so he's the one we should be looking at. Also, in case it hasn't been fucking obvious, Tonkla is an essential character in 4 Minutes, which is why we're getting many scenes with him. The reason I mentioned the actors is pretty self-explanatory - people are mad their favourite actors are shown a specific amount of time, giving space to other plot lines and characters, instead of being there for the whole episode, as if the point of 4 Minutes is the romance between Tyme and Great and nothing else. Meanwhile, Bible himself was laughing and clapping and enjoying the flashback scene between Korn and Tonkla when they had their first time, because Bible wanted to be part of a good production, which he is and he recognizes it. But no, God forbid we get more context over KornTonkla, which is one of the most important relationships in the show, which guides Tonkla's actions, which moves the fucking PLOT of the SHOW. I could give the benefit of the doubt to people being upset Tonkla was shown for not even half of episode 4, but I won't, and the reason for that is because I'm sick and fucking tired of people getting their panties in a twist because a character who loves getting fucked is actually getting fucked in almost every episode. Good for him honestly, even if it's making him worse. (I've already ranted about this whole thing here, I'm not going to repeat myself) I don't know how your social media feeds are like anon, but mine are flooded with BibleJes + GreatTyme content and I rarely see anything about KornTonkla or Bas and Fuaiz or anything of the sort, so I can't agree with you that they're more talked about than the main actors/characters. (That's not the case on Tumblr though: I have a very varied feed + my lovely anon asks which give me the chance to talk about my boys and I'm thankful for that.) And I'm sorry, anon, but I'm going to have to disagree with you in the end: Great and Tyme do NOT feel like the side couple at all. They are and they feel very much like the main couple and they've had multiple scenes together in every single episode so far (at the hospital, in Great's garage, at the park, at the university, at the arcade, inside Great's car, at the rooftop of the hospital, at the warehouse, inside the tent etc). We've gotten plenty of fucking content for them AND also BOC has made sure to give Bible and Jes the chance to do a million interviews together + magazine photoshoots, with only half of the show being done, so fans have zero fucking reason to complain about anything. That's all. Rant over.
#istg it feels like I've been blocking more people on the daily than when the scandal was happening#people are fucking horrible#and they don't realize at all that THE ACTORS CAN SEE THIS#Fuaiz can SEE people being unhinged about him having more than 2 minute cameos every episode#he has worked his ASS off for this role and it fucking shows#I get having favourites I do#but for the love of God if you only care about the shipping then go make edits and watch your faves' scenes over and over and stfu already#Bible has no problem with other actors getting the spotlight besides him#NOBODY IS STEALING HIS MAIN ROLE FROM HIM#EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS IN THE SHOW IS BECAUSE OF GREAT#Be NORMAL for ONCE holy SHIT#I said rant over but I couldn't resist ranting in the tags as well#I'm TIRED people#I'm fucking TIRED#see Tonkla having a scene or two this episode and people losing their minds again even though I'm sure we'll get a lot of TymeGreat scenes#Was this what it was like for VP fans while KPTS was airing because I'm not having fun like this I'm really not#thank fuck for my friends and my lovely anon asks because I wouldn't be surviving otherwise#4 minutes#bible wichapas#jes jespipat#fuaiz thanawat#fandom
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Thinking about bloodless resolution for act 6 fight but still kind of bad for Siffrin? Like a bad ending. I haven't seen anyone making an AU, where Loop is taking back "what belongs to them", but with Siffrin still alive and... in Loop's body instead? They swapped bodies because of the wish and now Siffrin is trying to get the party to recognize them, but they don't believe him... since they no longer look like themself. And Loop is basking in joy from getting their family back.
#unhinged spoilers for the witch's house and manga#this post was inspired by it#so imagine their fight like the ending#siffrin is searching for loop they fight and loop wins#and they exchange bodies because of the wish and now have to deal with the consequences#when I think about this scene with ellen very gleefully telling viola that “she never should have let it go!”#the similiar line comes to mind: you should have never let me help you stardust~#i feel evil for this but it is an interesting thought#in stars and time#isat#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#two hats spoilers#act 6 spoilers#but yes it's more mean-spirited in my head#I think like body exchange happens during choking and they both let go at this moment#before things go south sifrrin (in loop's body) backs away from loop (in siffrin's body)#they look at each other confused#before loop laughs and thanks the Universe for making their wish come true#siffrin is not taking it well and don't act timely to notice that loop is gone#loop just... comes back to their family and plays their role#siffrin finally regains composure and quickly runs to them but...#they don't know how to explain it without sounding like crazy? it's a lot to take in and they're not doing well#so you have it#fifty musings
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I feel like in the past the mix of this site being used for both activism and fandom helped contribute to a lot of unhinged politicized fandom discourse where yeah ofc there's a political tie to media but ppl used it as... a form of activism where it was given disproportionate importance compared to other activism discussions? Whereas now we're swinging to the opposite site of How Dare You Care About Meaningless TV Shows When Politics.
Like... we can have a mix of realizing there's more important stuff to focus on than shipping discourse in the world at large without also minimizing the insane doxxing and death threats behavior going on in fandom that people in fandom have to take into consideration to be able to do their hobby, esp given how those attitudes stem from irl political climates at times in ways that are telling to study. Hobbies are kinda how we prevent activism burnout also. Crazey how that works.
#Txt#I am also not immune to overly politicizing fandom#But also I use the site in the curated fashion one would use fandom dedicated forums in#So of course that's my focus here and ofc i process a lot here specifically thru a fandom lens#Ofc other people do too if you look at it in that way#So it's probably bizarre for ppl who do come here primarily for activism to see posts abt#fandom drama btwn posts abt the world being on fire#Ofc that contrast makes fandom stuff all look totally meaningless#when... every community has these discussions esp within curated spaces#It's not stupid to care about fandom bs that impacts me in fandom#And it is in fact weird to assume my posts here are a reflection of my understanding of the world and#a performance of everything I'm doing or not doing to help a cause#Just like someone who uses this site for activism probably has an irl club they're in#for a less stressful hobby. Or at least I hope they do#The difference is that's not under surveillance bc it's offline lol#And im sure clubs or whatever have their insane drama too that needs attention sometimes#Maybe I'm overly sensitive to these things as a person w health issues that make#my options for socializing fairly limited - so the specific brand of unhinged social shit#that happens in online fandoms does weigh more heavily for me and the tons of other ppl#like me who hang out here bc we don't have anywhere irl#But idk I don't think it needs to be an extreme case for there to be some basic understanding#of why fandom is like... important to people... and that other people on a site#where you can so easily curate ur experience are gonna be talking abt stuff#relevant to the way they've curated their experience#Barging into the crocheting subreddit like why aren't you talking about pothole maintenance in New Jersey#Ik tumblr is more mixed up but that's what this feels like sometimes#Specific spaces for specific things. What a concept.
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is episode 8 the domitian arc ? more on this and EVEN MORE narratives i’ve been ignoring that the show said “actually,,,” about in 5
#hermes staying domitian’s hand… hermes’ face a flash of discomfort when he was torturing tenax… hmm. character growth.#WHAT WAS THAT HERMES. WHAT WAS THAT LOOK. NO GIRL GET BACK HERE I CANNOT ALSO DO THIS NARRATIVE OF YOU NO LONGER ABLE TO PULL HIM BACK FROM#THE BRINK OF HIS CRUELTY WATCHING HIM CHANGE AND SEEKING OUT SOMEONE ELSE IN HIS NEED AND FEAR AND ANGST. NO BABY GIRLLLL#I DON’T WANT TO WRITE A HERMES POINT OF VIEWWWW OF THE SIX YEARS HE SPENT WATCHING DOMITIAN BLOOMMMM INTO HIS POWER AND CORRUPTTTT because.#correct me if i’m wrong but in that very first scene that was a young hermes in the white right he watched domitian give his speech and saw#his father to truly see him the whole time as hermes has seen his brilliance.#NO I ALSO SAW THAT GUARD’S HEAD FOLLOW HERMES oh i hate it here. you know what i also hate? i need domitian to be successful for tenax#but also i do kinda like titus… NOOOOOO NO KILLING TITUS DOMITIAN I JUST SAID I LIKED HIM!!!! DOMITIAN!!!#oh. ohhhh no. OH NOOOO okay listen we can redeem this. we can have the whole turning point of the narrative be domitian’s mercy of hermes#the ultimate staying of his hand. proving he’s not entirely gone that hermes & his love still means something. do i think this will happen#no absolutely not. before he can kill his brother domitian has to kill the only other living person he loves perhaps more than titus if he#could ever realize it. (a brief interlude to yell LET’S GO LESBIANS LET’S GO HI IRIS) domitian… please spare him… OH WAIT HELLO THE BLOOD!!#ALSO a brief interlude to say i knew it was coming but ELIA’S SPEECH ABOUT LOVING INCITATUS??? I WAS ON THIS INCITATUS SHIT WITH THE LITTLE#NOD THEY HAD WHERE SCORPUS CALLED HIM TO BEAT XENON OH MY GOD I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS!!! elia’s going to crush him. incitatus won’t listen.#scorpus is going to die twice once when they call elia’s name instead of his and then the second time when the scorpion bites him again#(he kills himself and tenax finds him. sorry to give everyone absolutely maximum damage here but uh. that’s how i can see it going down)#or alternatively worse: after killing titus who at times he loves and hates in equal measure (if y’all don’t think I have some UNHINGED#brothers quotes. we’ll keep mum here about why but suffice to say it is. relevant to other fandoms. and thus i have a Collection) the last#thing domitian has to do is kill hermes. and this one is both out of betrayal but also love because I think somewhere in here titus’ queen#berenice plays a role because domitian’s hatred of the jews probably comes to play a role and I think titus would show up and protect her#like Domitian engineers some kind of a situation where in theory titus could escape alive or beat him but he can’t do that & save berenice#and so of course he saved berenice. or she dies in his arms and he goes mad with grief and any way you put it berenice is the trap & titus#happily crawls into the lion’s mouth to save her for love of her etc and domitian sees him die for it. he gives titus every chance to come#back to him to work with him to be what he wants him to be and he always chooses himself he chooses love and domitian can’t understand even#when it makes him weak. and then he sees hermes dirty and emaciated and still terribly terribly beautiful and feels such a pang of longing#and love that he decides he has to die because he (domitian) cannot be weak. he cannot have any of it. also giving domitian worse paranoia#than he already has because if you kill your brother the one person who should always love you—support you—who can build me a new brother—#you’ve gotta generate some MAJOR issues. namely trust issues. and if he kills hermes they’ll be even worse. so like ideally To Me domitian#wouldn’t kill him but i do very much see the symbolism of cutting off his last earthly tie & desire to ascend to the divine imperial throne#those about to die
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Even when Gayle is at her worst at least she tries to be a good aunt to Linda’s kids unlike Al and Gloria who barely interacts with them.
my true opinion is that gayle actually loves being an aunt and her nieces and nephew are like some of her favorite people ever. Now she's not GOOD at being an aunt but nobody can argue she doesn't love the hell out of those kids!!!
i genuinely believe she likes them and enjoys spending time with them and she'll try to find a (reasonably-priced) gift for their birthdays and christmas that's related to their interests even if it's like a horse keychain or something. when she brought them gifts when she was visiting she got gene a gumball from the store!!! bcuz she knows he loves candy!!!! That's aunt behaviour right there
tina is probably her favorite just because tina is a lot more willing to go along w/ her bullshit and bcuz they both have the same anxious tendancies but she loves all three of them <3
this is my personal favorite gayle moment. it feels like such a natural look into their lives and relationship to each other even when gayle isn't the actual Focus of the episode she still calls and talks to them. "hey aunt-g what's up :)"
#also gayle telling linda that she's her sister and she loves her. and that she is happy when good things happy to linda bcuz they're sisters#and it feels like something good is happening to her too 😭 genuinely i love gayle as a character she's so unhinged but also sweet#u can tell she really does care#ask#bob's burgers#video
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okay, i'm not saying that feeding barton would just straight up diffuse barton's need for being a murderous gremlin because that is just so deeply ingrained him in now that it's not even funny, but i'm also not saying if you — say — placed a quesadilla in front of barton right before he was about to do about something horrible to someone... that there couldn't be at least a bit of a chance he would think about eating that instead
#OF MONSTERS AND MEN: musings.#ooc post.#SKSKS no because barton IS the type of terrible character to possibly kill people just bc he's hangry and doesn't realize it#but OFC... this would unfortunately maybe happen like once or twice over the years bc barton CAN be affected by how he's feeling-#physically when he uhhh. Decides whether or not to kill someone as horrible as that sounds#but most of the time it's due to how unhinged he is and/or because he is a sadist and also delusional which is... yeah YIKES#though i feel like even if Barton had the want to change thing's for himself / turn over a new leaf so-to-speak...#he would REALLY have to address that delusional part because that is not a joke OFC though i know the rest of this post is pretty unserious#barton is just. yeahhh basically what i'm trying to say is it would take a LOT more than just food to convince him to not kill people on a-#permanent basis though i know that y'all may already know that ahahhh. but yeah I'm just being a bit sillay here and talkin' about how-#barton lovesss food so like. you never know perhaps it could happen if he didn't hate this person enough but IDK JSJSJ
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no bc they rlly got me with that “do you remember what he did to you? I was there” bc up to this point no one has been genuine about the abuse. They’ve used it in power plays, in weird psychosexual soliloquies, everytime someone else’s experience of abuse has been brought up it’s been transactional. Say sorry because you neglected Connor, feel an emotion because you hit Roman. But stewy… man! It was just this one last Hail Mary to get Kendal OUT. And the only way kendal knew how to respond to probably the only non-transactional ‘normal people’ exposition of abuse was trying to get his own transaction to go through while offering nothing in return because stewy showed his hand and Kendall knew he wanted Nothing but Him.
#succession#kenstewy#yeah.#I get why they took that line out#it doesn’t feel like succession at all#not the right vocabulary not the right tone not the right jargon#but it would have been So great had they kept it in#just this one genuine plea that doesn’t even sound like it should be in the show#before as we all know hell breaks loose tomorrow#just this ONE time#and it didn’t work#the fact that this was in some fucking variety ? idk which magazine interview#this is what happens when you give Middle Easterns representation actually#they rock ur world#here is a secret I appreciated succession like I appreciate any good media#e.g the first 3 seasons of breaking bad#sort of an undeniably well made thing#but they put an Iranian on screen and he gave an unhinged interview and now….#crazy thing is I’m not even saying any of this with the homoerotic subtext we all love#the kids to adult childhood friends trope where they witnessed each other’s abuse and now they want to run the fucking world#that.
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Due to the terrible combo of an anxiety disorder, autism and layers worth of trauma I am the most self conscious person ever when it comes to what I like that I think I have imposter syndrome but sometimes I wonder why I specifically feel like being a mecha fan perks up this factor- until I lurk in the fandom and see people who are so deeply strict about this genre that they dictate what you should watch but also are incredibly judgmental about it that it’s no wonder I even constantly go back and forth on “am I actually a mecha fan” Jesus CHRIST you people need to stop taking shit so fucking seriously
#meg text#might delete later#this came from the fact I decided to try to be on bluesky more and ohhh the twitterification has already started#not that I haven’t seen bad gatekeepy takes here for this genre but at least this site userbase is smaller#oh and feeling more anxiety given my hyperfixation is one of the ���big 3” so I feel things pin on me AHAHAHHA#”you have to watch this because you like this” no I fucking don’t go away#sometimes i legitimately just wanna stick to general sci fi anime that has androids just so i dont gotta be lumped into this#the problem is that technically counts as mecha but also afaik there isn’t a lot in comparison to mecha#or general sci fi genres that are as big as this one in anime#and nothing gonna change my love for the unhinged cosmic horror robot series which means I gotta deal with this shit#even when I ignore it I just feel pressure I just feel like a fraud ugh#I wish people would be more calmer about this but this is what happens when a genre is downplay constantly
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YOUR HONOR THEY ARE EACH OTHERS REASON AND PURPOSE
#if anyone needs me I’ll be bawling my eyes out in the same corner John is doing his down time for being a jealous bitch#malevolent podcast#arthur lester#oscar malevolent#malevolent pod#unhinged aromantics are coming for my life#they are so deep into what ever this relationship is starting to be something is going to happen I can feel it in my bones#cuz like when has Harlan ever let us have some thing nice?#John being displaced hurts my soul but also my boy r u ok fr?#and also I live for little jealous retors and he’s right about most things so Im loving this ep with my entire heart
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It’s interesting how bits and pieces of yourself end up finding their way into your characters as you write. All of my ace-spec characters tend to have an underlying emotional vibe of “I’m the only sane person holding shit together.” That’s the way I’ve felt in so many situations as an asexual person.
#asexuality#writing#personal#oh and I know I’m absolutely NOT the only sane one#I’m also unhinged in my own way#very much so#lol#but to be fair#I’ve felt that way in many situations since puberty#and it just seeps into them#I also often don’t create ace characters intentionally#they just happen#when I write though everyone is kind of bi by default until I get a better feel for them as a character#and then it’s like oh okay this is your deal
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#thoughts#personal#mental health tw#it's complicated because I both want to address how fucking unhinged I very publically am at the moment#for which I am sorry if you have noticed#and also Not do that and pretend my weirdass behavior flies under the radar and I am being So Very Normal Right Now#which I feel we are past that point but also maybe who cares I don't think people notice but You Know#you get in the thought loop and then it's over#I used to have a private twitter to have weird meltdowns full of me immediately deleting everything I posted#and then I went “wow!! this is not happening anymore!! look at me being an adult about it!!”#and uhh lol#I didn't want it to happen here it's very humiliating to know you are Like This and not being able to affect it much#this too shall pass I suppose#normal posting (???) will resume shortly#I just get super manic when I have mental health cocktails like this + my brain Will Not let me sleep and I need to distract myself#all I want to say is: I'll be normal again at some point probably#it was on slow cook since maybe 9 months and baby it's here now#I'm supposed to go to my first industry event RIGHT after a very very tense burial and I'm already so disheveled like girl what#I'm so going to begin screaming at an industry legend for no reason and then immediately lock myself in a bathroom#anyway. common sense and self control will be back soon#and there are good chances I'll delete this post too at some point!! but. yeah.#it is what it is tm#hope you are as okay as could be#and if not all the courage and strength your way#sending many angry blue ganonpigs your way too. hope that helps! somehow!
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