#why would i cry about it?
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No you're a grown-ass adult crying about the ending to repo the genetic opera
#not me#why would i cry about it?#I'm not crying!#I haven't seen it several times since I was 14 and am now crying as#as i rewatch it#repo! the genetic opera
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if we could stay connected, just like this
#ok last orbit niigo post im emubrained again and also i miss leoneed#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#mizuki5 spoilers#proseka#mizuki akiyama#mizu5#nightcord at 25:00#hurray !#meltdown released an amazing translation of the event so i read it and had my final cathartic transgender cry about it#and now i have ~4 assignments due on friday so i have to stop drawing mizuki. sad.#i recommend everyone watch meltdown's translation#please. its very good and better than the mtls floating around#i Get why people wanted to see it translated asap like i Get it i didnt understand half of the wordplay or kanji but like . wah#its so crazy how this event breached containment n how many people are rooting for mizuki even tho they dont play the game so i just#think its a shame that the translation everyones reading isnt really accurate/lacks the nuances.. Ok sorrynits a good event.#ive just been thinking abiut that for a few days and i love talking in tags. Adios#real Orbit heads will know this is an Heartorbit reference (that tarot card sketch i did almost 2 years ago and said i would finish)#(i havent finished shit)
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/e7ed6164fa79ef1b3bf4a92606a9c23c/da07d96d64a3021f-2e/s540x810/e3b2852c8b5be582c31cf16ebd9ccc23de0024e6.jpg)
The tamest Afton kids’ fight in FNAF history
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#michael afton#evan afton#elizabeth afton#fnaf crying child#afton family#fredbear#fnaf cc#fnaf 4#sister location#fnaf fanart#five nights at freddy's#MORE AFTON FAMILY CONTENT 🔥#the Afton siblings hanging out!!#cc maybe like afraid of Michael but Elizabeth isn’t#IDK WHY but I have this strong feeling Elizabeth would actually challenge Michael#something about her being more stubborn and also broke the rules#yeah she’d fight Michael BAHA#THE younger Afton siblings stick out for each other 😤#in canon this is the most tame and normal interactions they’ll have
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pick your battles
#my art#my stuff#art#comic#original art#pride 2024#pride month#trans allegory..... or not even allegory. just trans .... ^_^#i technically cannot come out yet but i don't think the people who i need to not see this stalk my tumblr#i know they stalk everything else like my twitter and my instagram but this might be safe#so fuck it we yap. this is a comic about picking your battles#this is a comic about how for almost a year now everyone at home in singapore has been crying about my sore throat#my terrible fucked up voice. my you know. etc#i came out as not cis and using they/them pronouns in 2015 when i was 14#but no one ever used my pronouns. none of my classmates or friends even up until i left for college in 2020#from 2020 onwards every year i wrote an angry vulnreable essay about how much it hurts that they dont remember#and people would dm me apologizing on their hands and knees and commending my bravery#and then forget about it all over again. id ont mean 'they misgender me and then catch it and apologize and correct themselves'#i mean they dont even get that far#and so you might ask yourself: why have you kept them around all this time?#and i would have to explain that by pure bad luck i grew up in the most conservative close minded community#that all of my ex classmates that stayed in singapore are cishet and upper middle class and chinese singaporean#that i Am the trans person. that they were able to ignore me for a decade partially because there was no one else#so this is a comic about how there is dignity and grace in staying in the closet sometimes#about how not everyone deserves to see you at your happiest. about how some people can go fuck themselves#you know your truth and THATS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS!!! YEAH!!! i love you
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#disco elysium#disco elysium fanart#kim kitsuragi#harrier du bois#harry du bois#this is probably one of my fav conversations in the game...#sad that not many people get to see it(?) cause you need like 7 in empathy?#comics#comic art#trans#cw blood#blood#cw smoking#my first time making a comic i hope it looks okay lmao#ough i have so many thoughts about kim and his complicated relationship with his name#im interpreting the dialogues in a very transgender way but its definitely about his racial identity too#cause its a *seolite* name#another factor of him not being seen as a revacholian#and its one of the only things he has left of his parents too#i wonder if the name kim is seen as more masculine or feminine in seol and in other isolas?#im definitely *not* projecting haha#i read once in a fic that kim *attempted* to translate his parents' letters when he was young#10/10 fic made me cry#thats why i decided to add the seolite dictionary - i dont think kim would have *tried* to learn seolite otherwise#he definitely has some kind of internalized racism he needs to get over#sorry for rambling#my art
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I've seen a lot of different takes on Fear Toxin/other fear causing stuff (Yellow Lanterns Ring or something)(later just called Fear Toxin cause I'm lazy) but here is another one.
Danny seems like he isn't affected by Fear Toxin because his biggest fear is that his accident changed him so much he is no longer human, he can no longer truly experience human things.
So when he gets lungful of fear Toxin, he feels normal. He was antsy before, because c'mon, it's a rogue attack but it's not worse. Or so he thought. Because the anxiety lingers. Not enough to register as abnormal just this slight hypervigilance that makes you see things about yourself and your surroundings that you'd never realize otherwise. He'd realize he doesn't blink as often. He'd realize that if he doesn't consciously focus, he sometimes seems to not touch the ground. Forgets to breathe. He can't feel his own pulse at time. He'd realize people will miss him when he's walking down the street as if he was invisible (people just don't care about everyone they pass by). When he'd look straight into his reflection, he'd look slightly to the left. Not enough to actually name anything that was wrong but just stretched enough to fall on the wrong side of the uncanny valley. If he just caught his reflection in the peripheral vision, it'd be vaguely shadowy creature with glowing green eyes and white smoke instead of hair. Overall he'd be just wrong enough to be distinctly not human.
For everyone else, he'd be just a dude. Literally couldn't find more normal dude than this dude. Will pass as absolutely normal human unless someone is specifically looking for ecto-ghost stuff. Even most magic users wouldn't clock him at the glance
Tldr: Fear Toxin makes Danny perceive himself as some sort of eldritch horror but not enough to make him believe he'd actually be affected, while from outside perspective he's Just A Dude™
#dpxdc#dc x dp#dp x dc#dcxdp#fear toxin#please no Ghost King#nothing against this au but i don't think it'll mesh well woth this idea#probably works best with danny soon after accident#maybe still believing all of his parents anti-ghost propaganda#that'd add to angst for sure#idk why he is somewhere where he could be affected#idk who would realize something is wrong#up to whoever wants to do expand on this prompt#he'd cry when someone tells him he's been in fact affected by fear causing thing#because this means he *is* human and while he was fundamentally changed by his death#it didn't fully get rid of his humanity#but he won't tell that too busy being relieved so whoever delivered the news would be in for the ride#actually it'd be cool if it was someone who has superpowers but they showed up later in their life#parallels y'know#... i may still not be normal about “i wonder what could lie beyond infinity” by Numinous_Scribe on ao3...#top notch fic go read it great Clark characterization#anyway because plot kinda escaped me#hope this idea scratches someone's creative braincell or something#im curious what y'all will make out of it#yellow lantern#have a nice day dear stranger who got to this part
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don't get any closer !!!
Palestine: Funds | Action | eSims | Info Sudan Resources | Congo Resources
#dbz#dragon ball z#dragon ball#dragon ball fanart#goku#gohan#still figuring out my tags for this tbh it's less simple somehow than other fandoms i've been in fhdgjdhk#anyways been thinking a lot lately about goku and gohan's relationship.#especially in regards to how completely different gohan is from his dad in regards to being truly deeply sensitive and emotional#i would simply LIKE TO THINK ABOUT goku not understanding WHY his son is a lil crybaby but still being very protective of him about it#no one makes his babies cry!!!! he'll BITE YOU!!!!!!
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The walk home from UA
#i've been thinking about micnight a lot. somebody call an ambulance or a therapist or something#this might even drive me to read School Briefs again just for content of them interacting for once#this is why Vigilantes is better we get more interactions with the teacher trio#I realise I draw a ton of this concept but I do not care anymore#nobody can stop me drawing silly micnight stuff. Piggyback ride. Partners in crime. They are just one of the ever.#you know.#bnha#eraserhead bnha#shouta aizawa#eri chan#nemuri kayama#hizashi yamada#present mic#midmic#do NOT look at Aizawa's arms and do NOT try and understand the physics of Mic's legs#it's half 2 in the morning I was not about to spend any more time making it look actually good#drawing people from the side my arch nemesis#if someone made a VRChat avatar of Midnight in her little skirt suit outfit from Save the World With Love I would cry#it's so hard to find normal Midnight avatars
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I'm running out of time...
#dmc#dmc5#devil may cry 5#devil may cry#vergil#vergil sparda#dmcedit#*dmc#*gif#these took a while .......................even in b/w the size just would not go down#anyway I dont understand why people are like 'he didn't have to do all that :///' like yeah a) he wasn't aware his actions have consequence#he's just a 40 yr old baby? duh#and b) he didn't want to die#i dont think it was about fighting dante he was literally breaking down physically#he had to do SOMETHING#he lacks foresight though i agree#in any case he was dying so we have to at least acknowledge he was desperate
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tell ren to turn his location on👉👈
I saw one of the posts of how ren does get jealous of pets being loved over him and alll that so now I have the thought of the one meme of ‘ah yes, me, my partner and their [enter normal pet size] foot [pet]’
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/1f2bebca1ef41b6288824c0b7bd08b70/4b233cec083a15be-f2/s540x810/1c947853922d663fc2a734d4371e078d56d82c4a.jpg)
I don’t have anything else, it did pop into my head though and I thought I’d share with the class.
⌞♥⌝ ItsNotVivy on Twitter actually made that exact meme with Ren a looong time ago!!
#💌 — answered.#💖 — 14 days with queue.#thegoofyest#In Viv we trust 😌 They were one of the very first people to take an interest in 14DWY!! /gen#Dare I say..... One of the founding fathers lmaooooo#Also!! Viv (along with a few other twitter artists) were one of the main reasons why I started this Tumblr in da first place! ^^#14DWY didn't have much of a following until they started makin memes and art on Twitter#Then all of a sudden I had all these people wanting to know more about the game; and da next thing I knew; I had over 50 asks overnight lol#So I owe a lot of 14DWY's success to ItsNotVivy; hmimprvmntbsmnt; dreosuger; Diachuu; glade_o; Meowastrophe; noullyart; etc.#And it's also the reason why I wanna show my appreciation towards them all by giving them Easter Eggs in the game#I also kind feel like it's the very least I can do to show my appreciation ghjsgjh ;v; Same with da 14DWY staff on Discord#It's the only place where I ask for help regarding managing the 14DWY socials (everywhere else is just me); and they go through hell n back#—to keep the server a fun and lively place for everyone#I owe so much to them as well; which is why some of da mods already have their own lil Easter Eggs in the game#I also like to think they're canon employees at the Corland Bay library gsdjgjg Except Jesse; that mf would set everything on fire /silly#Also not me getting mushy in the tags????????? What is happening to me.... Where is my mysterious and aloof persona...... /j#I'll shuddup now before I start crying (/pos) over the founding fathers on Tumblr as well lmao
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More on Lanterns and Marvel
See original post here: https://www.tumblr.com/moonlightcycle571/765612915343704064/lantern-corps-and-a-10-year-old-child-in-a-last
I talked about the Lantern list (a ranking of people who to this day refuse lantern offers) and having Billy Batson be number 1, and have Captain Marvel be number 2.
This would naturally attract the attention of Lantern Cores everywhere (like what do you mean they received offers from multiple lanterns multiple times), the space community (why does the Terra City of Fawcette have dominating spots) as well as the JL (Cap, why are you outclassed by a civilian from your own city).
I also fully believe Lois Lane is on the same boat as Billy Batson when it comes to Lantern offers. One does not jump off buildings or sneak into war zones without a great deal of will power and induce a great deal of fear. Lois Lane is definitely in the top 10.
Coincidentally, in the top 50, you will find Cat Grant, Vic Sage and surprisingly Vicki Vale (if she can make BATMAN shudder and be wary of her, she can make anyone fear her).
So it’s been accepted that journalists have a lot of will power, a lot of rage and can put the fear of god into you. Clark is not bitter that he’s not on the list, no sire. Never mind that Jimmy Olsen is in the Top 100.
Batman might want to study this phenomenon.
But anyways. One does not stay at the top without ridiculous numbers. As the only top 10 ers on earth, they have grown used to random rings trying to get them on space politics quests or whatnot.
So now imagine this: Lois Lane and Billy collab on a project. While they are speaking, random rings start to show up. Instinctively, both swat them away like flies while maintaining eye contact. They don’t realise what they are doing. Clark is having an aneurism.
At some point, they both realise that the other is swatting the rings away with the same nonchalance as the other. They immediately understand what’s up. The shit eating grin they both had made a bunch of yellow rings swarm around them.
Billy gets asked on why he doesn’t want to join the Green lanterns? Billy says it’s because he hates cops. Lois nods.
Hal cries himself to sleep that night.
Bonus:
Batman stalking a civilian named Batson who for some reason is number one in the Lanterns List, with an alarming amount of yellows.
Batman finds a black hair, blue eyes, orphan child.
Batman: Alfred call the guy
Bonus 2:
Nightwing, trying to meet his future maybe brother: Hi 👋
Billy, sees an authority figure in Blue that wields batons and electricity: …
Billy immediately kicks Nightwing while yelling ACAB
Billy runs away
Nightwing cries himself to sleep that night.
#billy batson#shazam#dc captain marvel#dc#hal would cry#Dick would cry#Hal Jordan#Dick Grayson#Batman#he’s trying to adopt this ‘scary’ orphan child#Billy is wondering about stranger danger protocols when homeless#Lanterns Ranking List#Lois Lane#she’s a queen and I love her#she would milk this so hard#Billy and Lois are terrifying together#the daily planet is unsure if they want to hire Billy for themselves or keep him far away from Metropolis specifically Lois#Clark Kent#he’s bitter he’s not on the list#he wants the journalist cred#People all over the galaxies are wondering what the fuck is up with Fawcette#why are there so many kids with lantern offers
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No one ever tells Obi-Wan that he is his Master's padawan.
Of course, for most people who had known Qui-Gon Jinn, telling someone else they resembled the the man would in fact be a thinly veiled insult. But still, Obi-Wan feels the absence of comparisons almost as strongly as he feels the absence of his Master.
There is no one for Obi-Wan to push against now, no strong presence at his side, ready to grab him by scruff and pull him back from another reckless stunt. It's an odd feeling. He has been set loose against his wishes. There is no one to his left and Anakin at his heels, but Anakin had needed, still needs, a strong, gentle figure for his prickly but sensitive heart. For even their worst bickering could not hold a candle to the scathing remarks he and Qui-Gon had shot at each other and Obi-Wan knows he cannot push and needle Anakin in the same way.
When Qui-Gon had been alive they had been an amusing, mirrored pair, the maverick and his rule-following padawan. Opposites clashing against each other, yet working together to complete the most difficult missions. Few saw that Qui-Gon's impertinence had indeed rubbed off on his padawan, cultivated from that small, angry initiate, because the only way to rebel against the rule-breaker had been to parrot the Council fastidiously. No one would ever get to see that again. Obi-Wan is one half of a mirrored pair trying to complete a routine on his own. What once was an impish, teasing compliance is now a betrayal of all his Master's values.
"How could Qui-Gon raise such a model Jedi?" He hears them say, "It's admirable that Master Kenobi was appointed to the Council despite his Master's maverick ways."
Padawan Kenobi would have yelled and kicked and screamed. Master Kenobi is serene. It should feel like an achievement. It feels like a disappointment.
Sometimes, Obi-Wan looks at the shape of the man he has moulded himself into, and aches to be his Master's padawan.
#I am so totally normal about them. (screaming crying throwing up)#anyway yeah obi wan has daddy issues but in a very specific way that's less i want a father figure and more i require an animal handler#hence why obi wan likes both alpha 17 and cody finally someone to tell him he's being an idiot and be bitchy with him he's missed this#giving the guilt boy MORE guilt complexes over honoring his masters legacy#but god really imagine you spend a decade making yourself the opposite of your master in a funny back and forth you both indulge in but the#BUT THEN!! he fucking dies and you're left alone occupying a dynamic carved for 2 people and everyone tells you they can't see any of your#dead master within you as if it's a joke. as if that's funny. as if that's a good thing. and people say he would be proud but would he?#would he be proud when everyone always tells you that you are the opposite of him? that you are everything he was not?#obi wan kenobi#qui gon jinn#qui gon and obi wan#disaster lineage#star wars
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#windscream#starblade#humanformers#maccadam#i designed them the way i would want to get with both so dont @ me#dude i cant find my old transformers sketchbook#im so mad because i already had human windscream designs#let me be lazy pleaaaaaaaaaaase#whatever its ok its ok i have 3 designs for human starscream and 1 for human windblade.#hes high maintenance#starscream#windblade#wait so now that ive drawn this can i get another fellow shipper to hold my hand when i reread TAAO for this year? its time for annual read#i cry about it for days. i need emotional support. or at least someone else to cry with me#i like to specifically read until TAAO and then stop#and then i rot in bed daydreaming about post-canon fix-its. where i dont fix shit. theyre both in extreme pain#but right now yknow what i want? i want ss locked up in wbs house. bro has good mental health. gains a little happy weight#and i want wb re-elected again and again and cybertron in the golden again. arts and culture thriving. many institutes for higher education#the titans are chilling and not ruining wbs life. much luck and prosperity to them both#hitting my head against a wall. why cant i have this#ok brb time to read hurt/comfort fanfic of wbss
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Belatedly remembering one of the worst parts of retail. Helped a couple who fucking hated each other and had wildly different preference, wouldn’t listen to me, didn’t buy a bed and kept me an hour later than I was supposed to be off.
#ramblies#kinda want to cry about it#like why would you treat your partner so shitty WHILE keeping me away from my wife who I LOVE A LOT AND WOULD NEVER SPEAK TO LIKE THIS#retail hell
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I don't know if anyone has pointed this out yet and I also don't want to fuel the "is it a tear or is it the rain" debate 😂 (and really, I have no idea, and we may never know, anyway lol), but, having watched that scene over a trillion times now…... am I trippin' or does it look like Rook is ALSO flippin crying in that same moment???
And BOTH on the right eye, too??
So, whether it's the rain or not, what are the odds of BOTH of them having a raindrop looking like a tear on their right eye and why do I just KNOW this is deliberate and how this might set the stage for the, quote, "connection between the two of them" that the devs talked about in the Game Informer article, Solas seeing himself in Rook/Rook identifying with Solas as the story unfolds?? And doesn't this feel almost poetic in a way?
#datv spoilers#dragon age the veilguard spoilers#rook#solas#WHY is everyone CRYING#and why am *I* crying thinking about THEM crying?? 😂#IS IT BECAUSE OF YOU VARRIC???#I mean why else would *Rook* cry?#oh god#I'm not reading too much into it right? lol#datv#da4#tinfoil time
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WOW!!! I LOVED "The Innocent Act Of Dredging Up The Past", IT WAS VERY GOOD!
I wonder how Y/N reacted when she found out she was pregnant and how Fox allowed herself to keep the baby because he doesn't seem like someone who likes sharing attention.
Thank you so much darling!!! I am so glad you asked me this because I have been thinking about Ren as a father nonstop since that request. My brain has been full of many thoughts and opinions and I am happy to have an outlet for sharing lol. That being said, forgive my blathering. ^^;
(18+ and warnings for noncon, pregancy/baby birthing talk, incredibly unhealthy relationships, abuse, and being kidnapped/held against your will.)
Being impregnated by Ren would be absolutely dreadful for you, causing you to spiral into a pit of fear and despair the moment you miss a period or begin to feel queasy in the morning. With the signs starting to show, your brain comes to the instant conclusion that you are with child-his child, and it frightens you like nothing else before. At first you try and convince yourself nothing is wrong, that you are probably just late due to stress, and your upset stomach can be any number of things, it doesn’t necessarily mean you are pregnant. Any of your symptoms can be explained away by something else, so in an effort to try and maintain your sanity your brain churns out explanation after explanation, no matter how nonsensical they may be, in hopes of calming your rampant nerves by coming to some other resolution. A stream of constant lies and false reassurances play on repeat in your brain, forcing the thought that you may actually be a mother to the farthest reaches of your mind.
But the longer you wait and the more you dwell on it, the more you are faced with the inevitable. He never wears protection, you haven’t had access to birth control, and despite your warnings of it being a delicate time of month for you, his base instincts always won out in the end. There was nothing else this could be.
Faced with the reality of the situation, you were now tasked with the burden of sharing the news with Ren. You didn’t want to tell him, terrified of what his response would be, worried that he would somehow blame this all on you and hurt you because of it, quite possibly worse than he ever has before. But an even more horrifying concern than that is if the news actually pleases him. What if he wants to keep the baby? What if you were forced to carry this pregnancy to term while trapped in this grim environment, left to raise another human that shares half their dna with a man who has done nothing but cause you irrevocable damage?
No matter what the outcome, none of them are favorable.
But you didn’t have a choice, and you knew it was better to break it to Ren sooner rather than later, lest this whole nightmare become irreversible. In the event he saw things your way, you wanted this thing out of your body as soon as possible (though you loathed to consider what strings Ren would pull to achieve this, and what backwater procedure would be done to do so).
At first Ren brushes it off, not truly believing your concern. He’s had sex with you countless times without protection and just now you get pregnant? Seems suspicious, so he concludes you’re either overreacting or trying to get a rise out of him, potentially both, and that in and of itself riles him up. Are you telling him this as some kind of ploy? Are you using a false pregnancy as a means to get him to ease up on you a bit or as an attempt at escape? After all you had gone through together, after all the love he has lavished upon you by sharing his home, his life, his heart, with you… Would you really tell a lie like this?
He struggles with that possibility. Despite his inclination to feel otherwise, he has a hard time believing you would use a pregnancy scare for your own selfish benefit. You have always been a good girl, his good girl, and deep inside he knows this is not something that is within your nature to do, even if he does have some major doubts.
So, though he doesn’t truly believe your claims, he buys the pregnancy test more as a means to shut you up and prove a point than because he actually believes you. Needless to say, he ends up biting his tongue over that one.
When hit with the truth, his emotions are mixed. On one hand, he wants nothing to do with children or child rearing. He didn’t have to do much of a self-assessment to recognize he would be a shit father, and he never particularly wanted to be a father to begin with. His own upbringing wasn’t the best, he himself never really having a father figure that was worth a damn to guide him or show him any love or support. He had no parenting manual to go off of, and was sure that a culmination of having no positive family experience and maturing into the warped individual he had become led to no other conclusion than NOT being cut out for fatherhood in the slightest.
More than that however, the thought of sharing you, even with a life he helped create, really REALLY pissed him off. Thinking of all the nights you would be spending tending to the baby when you could instead be wrapped up in his arms, or all the attention and affection you will be giving some inept kid that could instead be going towards him, truly gets under his skin. He doesn’t WANT to share you. You’re HIS. And while a baby isn’t going to change that, he doesn’t want the needless competition to begin with.
But on the other hand, having a baby does have its appeal. It would be nice to bring a life into this world that loves him from the get-go, completely relying on him while being totally oblivious to all that has happened in the past. That sort of pure, blind love is hard to come by in this world, and the fact that he could obtain it so easily from a life he created with you, a human that has your blood running through its veins, is EXTREMELY appealing. And on top of that, you are sure to love the child whether its conception was wanted/planned or not. If you loved a child that was half his for the remainder of your life, would that not bind you to him for just as long? Though he didn’t doubt your loyalty (or his ability to keep you tied to him with no hope of escape), it would be a nice assurance to have in the rare event things did not end up going his way.
Once that thought enters his head, it’s over. No further thinking or future planning is required-he is going to be a father, and YOU are the beautiful mama! Congratulations! (Does he get off to you being pregnant? Did this pregnancy make Ren Hana realize he has a breeding kink??? Sources say yes and that’s your problem to deal with now. :))
♡
Holding his newborn for the first time, he has never been so nervous. Tears flood his eyes as he watches the small bundle squirming in his arms, his heart aching as they stare up at him with wide, pure, inquisitive eyes. He was no stranger to ending lives, but creating them? This was something entirely new, as exhilarating as it was scary. His smile grew as he stared at her small face, pleased that she looked so much like you. He could only hope that her personality would mirror yours as well.
♡
As time passes and the baby grows, you find out quick that Ren has a very ‘hands off’ way of parenting, which is to say he relies on you to do most of the work. And honestly, he feels that is fair. He’s the breadwinner who works hard to provide for you and the newborn, which leaves all other parental duties in your capable hands. You are left to be the child’s main caregiver, their guiding force to lead them through life, their teacher, confidante, and friend. It’s a daunting task, all residing solely on your shoulders.
Ren won’t readily admit it, but he much prefers it that way. All the abuse that he has suffered through from an early age, every heinous act of violence that has been carried out by his own hands (your wounds, included), all of it has turned him into something unrecognizable, something grotesque. Even if he wanted to have more of a presence in his child’s life, he knows he doesn’t deserve it. If he had too much sway in the kids development there’s a good chance they will grow up to be like him in some way or another, which would be a waste of all the love and hard work that you had put into raising them into being an upstanding person. Ren had made peace with who he had become, but that didn’t mean he wanted to keep a cycle that someone like Strade had begun going either.
So, the baby more or less becomes your soul responsibility, and god is that a burden for you. It’s bad enough that you have such little support from Ren to begin with, but the fact that this is YOUR first time being a parent as well makes it all so much worse. You have no idea what the hell you are doing, and with Ren making sure to keep you as isolated as possible you had no one else to turn to for help, either. It was just you and this brand new life with no one else to rely on, if you fucked up in even the smallest way it could be devastating to the baby. If your daughter got truly hurt, sick, or worse in your care, you didn’t know how you would live with the repercussions, let alone handle Ren’s reaction.
If your life with Ren hadn’t already made you a strung out, nervous, irritable wreck, being a mother certainly would. As she continues to grow, Ren refuses to discipline the child at all, not wanting in any way to appear like a ‘bad guy’ to your daughter. Given the circumstances, part of you is thankful for that (you honestly don’t know what you would do if he turned his ire towards her), but it also just makes things more difficult with you. You are already beyond stressed about trying to raise a child in this type of environment, having no united front and constantly butting heads makes raising her that much harder, especially when any kind of rule you attempt to establish can so easily be overridden by her father who has no remorse over the frustration this causes, nor care as to how his flippancy may affect your child’s development in the long run.
It’s also not lost on you that being the sole disciplinarian also paints you in a less than favorable manner in your child’s eyes, something you are sure Ren has thought about as well. Being the ‘strict’ parent means your child will be more likely to hide things from you, or seek out her father instead of you for support, approval, and advice. Given whom Ren was as a person, this thought didn’t sit particularly well with you.
All you can really hope and pray for is that somehow despite the lack of social interaction and outside influence she will grow up to be a decent human. Even maturing under the delusion that her father is a noble man, even if in some instances you have to make yourself the villain, as long as it helps her out in the long run you’ll do everything you can to insure your daughter lives the best life she possibly can, whether her father helps you or not.
I think the REAL problems will begin when the child gets older. When she truly comes into herself and forms her own opinions, develops her own personality, and starts to forge her own way of life… It’s gonna be messy. :/ Your child’s autonomy is definitely going to be a point of contention for Ren in the future, and he won’t be so pleased if/when she catches on to his true nature and begins to rebel or straight up reject him. God forbid she tries and join forces with you or attempt to become your savior. It’s going to take a lot of cunning on her end to make it out unscathed.
Also, I kind of touched on it previously, but Ren would be incredibly horny the whole pregnancy. Not that he isn’t already incessantly slavering over you, something about seeing you round and full just makes him snap. Which is scary in its own right, Ren isn’t the most gentle of lovers to begin with and has a tendency to lose himself more often than naught, hurting you in the process. It’s a constant struggle to satiate him while protecting yourself and the unborn baby, best of luck to you! :D
(And he’ll definitely breastfeed from you. He’s gotta make sure you are producing enough for the baby, ya know? :))
#overall I think he would really grow to love the fun and cute aspects of fatherhood#but all the hard and gross stuff hes like OK I am out moms turn fuck this#and he would be fixated on making himself out to be the coolest dad ever. He yearns for it. His kid HAS to think hes awesome in every way.#If his child makes fun of him he will cry and think about it for the rest of his life.#it will be 3am 8 years later and he will randomly mention the time they laughed at him to you while lying in bed together and you are like#why do you even remember this? lul#anyway THANK YOU FOR THE ASK I HOPE YOU ENJOYED!!!#ren hana x reader#ren hana headcanon#ren hana x y/n#ren btd x reader#ren btd x y/n#fox tpof x reader#fox tpof x y/n#fox tpof headcanon#mothresponse#mothwingswritings
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