#why do you even watch tv bestie if you are disgusted so much with it these days

[keirahknightley]

It WaS sUppOsEd tO bE aBoUt sPiEs nOt sEx

[thebadboyfanclub]

The Sun And Moon (Pete Davidson x Reader)

Heyyyyyy besties! So I'm back with another white boy of the month. I would like to warn you that this will be mentioning Pete's BPD and the reader will be mentioned as somebody that has had traumatic experiences however i am not mentioning what does that imply so don't worry about it. Other than that I hope you enjoy!

Being with Pete was almost a gift and a curse, you were so different yet so alike. The ultimate example of twinflames, the yin and yang. If someone had to describe what you two were like was that (y/n) was like the sun, a warm personality with kindness and such just overall this untouchable beauty from inside and out, also she adores to be under the sun, Pete sometimes found her as she laid on the floor next to her cat just so she can enjoy the warm rays, sometimes she would have her crystals (Pete called them "magic rocks") which Pete found so adorable, also as the weather got warmer she got happier.

Pete was the moon, a little bit more moody, mysterious, yet alluring, he intrigued anyone that was around him. Unlike (y/n) Pete was a night owl, he liked late night drives, staying up all night just smoking weed and watching movies, he liked the silence that the nightfall brought, he felt more at peace with the idea of relaxing and enjoying the darkness that others feared. Many times (y/n) woke up in the middle of the night and found him on her balcony, just sitting there and enjoying the view.

People around them brought up that comparison so much that they even got it as a couples tattoo, (y/n) got the sun behind her ear and Pete got the moon on his left middle finger cause he found it funny. However the curse was that they had to learn how to be around one another, yes they had similarities but they weren't quite the same situations.

Pete was a comedian, (y/n) was an author, both of them had to sometimes sit their ass down and think of something to write, but the circumstances were different. 

"Baby I'm here"

Pete said as he shut the door of (y/n)'s apartment, dropping his pair of keys on the bowl that she had conveniently placed on a piece of furniture right next to her front door. Pete waited for an answer while taking off his shoes, (y/n) liked structure and she was a very neat person, another thing Pete had to learn, he wasn't dirty but he was a tad bit of messy so when he was at her apartment (which basically had become his also) he was careful with how he did things.

Silence greeted him back, he sucked in his teeth as he realized exactly why this was happening. (Y/n) had mentioned that she was writing the second book of her fantasy novel and she was in a bit of a writer's block, she had so many fresh ideas however when it came to writing them down sometimes her mind just wouldn't co operate and she just couldn't get it down in a way that she found right. He left the take out food on the small coffee table and continued to walk towards her bedroom. 

There she was, slightly laying back on her leather chair with her laptop in front of her, just staring at her screen and occasionally pressing a few buttons. The door was somewhat open so he could take a good look at her, her hair was down, she was wearing some shorts and a t-shirt she had accidentally spilled bleach on so now it was a house shirt and no socks, she hated wearing socks. Pete knocked on the semi closed door to get her attention.

"Oh I didn't hear you come in"

"I figured, what are you doing here babe?"

"Regretting my decision on signing the contract for a second book"

She mumbled when Pete approached her and leaned down to press several kisses on her neck and cheeks. (Y/n) smiled and enjoyed the feeling of comfort he brought her before shaking her head and pulling away from him.

"I need to finish this chapter"

"What you need to do is eat, I'm pretty sure you skipped breakfast"

She knew he was right, that's why she didn't respond so she just kept on staring at her laptop screen, hoping that miraculously an idea will come to her head. She deeply appreciated his concern but she felt the pressure of her publicist that called everyday to ask about the book, today was one of the few days she chose to not pick up the phone. Pete once again was met with silence although that didn't stop him from placing his hands on her shoulders to give her a massage.

"Come on sunshine, you can take a break and clear your head"

"Pete I have to write thousands of pages in a short amount of time, it's not just fucking punchlines"

Pete's face made a sour expression at her jab. It did sting a little bit yet he tried to understand that she was just overwhelmed with the responsibility of delivering on time. He took a deep breath before patting her on the head and turning away from her.

"I'll be in the living room"

For some time she felt relieved that he left so she could refocus, however after a few moments when she started to see her reflection on the screen she started to realize what she had done which was awful. She felt so bad that she had to shut down the screen and close her laptop so she wouldn't look at herself, she spoke in such a disregarding manner that she felt disgusted. With tears already clouding her eyes she got up and found Pete watching TV, the take out in front of him and it didn't take long for her to notice that he had bought her favorite making her feel even worse. She stood in front of the TV and Pete looked in her eyes and smiled.

"I'm sorry"

Her voice breaks in the middle of the sentence. Pete's smiled dropped when he saw a year escaping and heard her whimpering voice, he immediately got up from the couch and went to hug her.

"Its okay sunshine"

"No it's not, I didn't mean it I swear"

"I know baby"

"I'm just so… stressed"

She said and let herself relax in his arms as she wrapped hers around his torso, feeling the warmth of his engulf her. His scent went to her nose making her feel safe in his arms as the tears stained his sweatshirt. Pete started rubbing her back to help her let out her emotions, he knew how emotional (y/n) was and he found it cute how she feels like cry no matter what the situation was, she had happy tears, angry tears, sad tears, she saw a dog tears, attending a wedding tears, he didn't mind it though on the contrary he liked that she was able to express her emotions with no fear.

"I understand baby, it did sting a bit though, you know how much I love my work"

"I know, I wasn't thinking when I said it which is wrong"

They had agreed that they wouldn't do the "it's ok" type of shit, they preferred to actually say when something either hurt them or bothered them so they can have clear boundaries with one another, it was one of the best decisions they could have ever made, it was one of the strongest foundations they had for their relationship. (Y/n) looked at him and Pete immediately went to wipe her tears, before pressing a kiss on her forehead.

"I'm sorry"

"I accept your apology. Are you feeling better now?"

"A little bit. Thank you for forgiving me and I will try to do my best to not repeat that behavior"

She responded, her voice now was more steady and clear.  Setting boundaries between them and being clear about the behavior that is acceptable was something they had established early in the relationship, Pete was diagnosed with BPD and (y/n) had trauma from past experiences so they had agreed to see a couple's therapist in order for them to move on with their relationship in a healthy manner, so things like "it's ok" or "you know I didn't mean it that way" were unacceptable, taking accountability for their actions and having the humility to apologize was their key to success.

Pete's smile reappeared and now gave her a kiss on her lips, making (y/n) get a bit of a shiver down her spine. Their kisses always felt so strong, like energy passing through one to the other, it was such a magical experience to them.

"Are we good?"

"Yes, now take a seat and I'll microwave your food"

"Wow, Gordon Ramsey would be so proud of you"

[itscominghome]

Hey bestie , I love what you write . Can you do one with mason , where they are dating and she gets negative comments and like she feels very bad but didn’t tell him . At the end he finds out and he takes her defens .💕💕

thank you for your request :) sorry it took so long x

Summary: Since you and Mason made your relationship public three months ago, you have received negative and abusive messages from fans. But when everything takes a drastic turn, Mason is there to protect you and takes to social media afterwards to shut down all the abuse and threats.

Warnings: Derogatory language

I'll Always Protect You

"Mason deserves better"

"Slut"

"You're not even that pretty"

"What does Mount see in you"

"I wish he'd just hurry up and break up with you"

"Lets be honest, you wouldn't look twice at him if he wasn't who he was"

"You're just with him for the money"

"I know where you live"

"Break up with him, we know where you live"

These were just some of the many Instagram messages I would receive daily. Some were just calling me names or making me out to be a gold-digger and the sorts. But those on the worse end of the spectrum, those threatening me made me feel sick in the stomach. They had started just over three months ago after Mason and I had gone public with our relationship and they hadn't stopped, only gotten worse. I hadn't told Mason about any of them, I mean surely all of the threats were empty, just a series of words strung together to try and scare me. But part of me was scared that if Mason saw them, he'd start to believe them himself.

"What you looking at, baby," Mason asks from beside me on the bed, sounding concerned. I realised that there must've been a shift in my emotions and immediately plastered a smile onto my face.

"Nothing, Mase," I reply, my voice unsteady. I hate lying to him.

"Tell me you're not reading one of those stupid articles about us again," he says, looking at me, a look of sadness on his face. On top of the private messages I had been receiving, there were a few articles online from gossip sites and even big newspaper companies slating our relationship. Of course, Mason knew about those, there was no way to keep them quiet.

"I don't care what they say, I love you," he would affirm every time he saw one or caught me reading one.

Mason had stayed over at my house last night, not yet moved in with each other, but today wasn't one of the days we could have a lazy day. A day spent cuddling up to each other in bed, doing nothing but watch films, or catch up on the latest episode of 'Married at Frist Sight', which Mason would repeatedly remind me he hated (he loved it really). But, unfortunately, Mason did have training on my day off. I felt him press a kiss to the top of my head before the bed dipped beneath me as he started getting ready.

"I'll come and pick you up later and we can go out for a meal or something," he promised as he opened the door thirty minutes later, pecking my lips lightly.

"Sounds good," I smile, "I love you,"

"I love you too," he says before closing the door and making his way to his car.

Tap. Tap. I looked up from the TV to look around for the source of the tapping noise. I noticed it almost straight away and my heart skipped a beat. There was someone outside my window, tapping on the glass, wearing a black balaclava. I froze in my seat, my hands shaking. He continued tapping for a few more seconds before moving to another window and continuing. Then he moved to the door, jiggling the handle in an attempt to open it. At this point, I start to panic, even more, rushing around looking for my phone.

"Where is it..? Where the fuck did I leave it..?" I whisper to myself as I rush upstairs, extremely distressed. I find it on my bedside table in my room and immediately dial Mason. Ring ring. Ring ring. Ring ring.

"Come on, pick up, pick up, Mase." Ring ring. Ring r-.

"Baby, you can't be missing me that much already, I've only been gone for ten minutes," he jokes light-heartedly.

"Mase..." I say, unable to form a coherent sentence.

"Baby, what's wrong? What's happening? Talk to me," he says, concern evident in his voice.

"Someone's outside, they... they were at the window... tapping it. And... And then they... they started trying to open the door. I can hear them shouting through the letterbox and hitting the door. Mase, I don't know what to do," I say, tears streaking down my face.

"Shit... I'm turning around right now, I'll be back as quick as I can, lock yourself in the bathroom or something, just in case they get in. Stay on the phone," I nod, trying to steady my breathing. On my way to the bathroom across the hall, I can hear the abusive muffled shouts. I pray to God that Mason can't hear what is being said through the phone.

I hear Mason's car pull up in the driveway and his car door slam shut. I unlock the bathroom door and race downstairs where I can see him attempting to confront my perpetrator before he runs away. I open the door, tears of terror still staining my cheeks. Mason sees me and runs over, pulling me into a hug

"Hey, hey it's okay, they're gone, I'm here now. I've got you," he comforts, taking me back into the house and sitting me down to calm me down.

"I didn't think they were being serious..." I say under my breath.

"Baby, what are you on about?" I try my best to play it off as nothing, but Mason won't listen.

"It was just a few messages, it doesn't matter,"

"Show me them," I reluctantly pass him my unlocked phone and he scrolls through my message requests.

"Why didn't you tell me..." he says with a frown, clearly upset that I had not confided in him.

"I thought that if you saw them, you'd start to believe what everyone was saying,"

"Oh, baby..." he whispers, pulling me into his chest, "Nothing anyone says will ever change how I feel about you. Go and get yourself a bag packed and you can come to training with me,"

"It has recently come to light the amount of hate, abuse and downright threats have been hurled at my girlfriend, Y/N. And to tell you the truth, I'm disgusted. So, I've come to Instagram to address it.

I was unaware of how much abuse had been projected onto her until earlier today when I read some of the messages she has been receiving on both Instagram and Twitter. Most accounts claimed to be Chelsea fans, but as I'm sure all of my teammates would agree, to verbally abuse one of our partners, someone that I LOVE, does not qualify you as a Chelsea fan.

I had obviously seen all of the news articles, those I could look past, but the threats became very real today. I am sure that those of you who messaged threats like "We know where you live, break up with him," were all just empty words. But today, I had to drive back to Y/N's house after leaving for training after receiving a phone call from her, telling me that someone was tormenting her in her own home. If this happens again, it WILL become a matter that will need to be treated more seriously.

Finally, I would like to say that no online abuse of anyone should be tolerated. People in the public eye have feelings too, they are human too. It is never okay to attack someone for loving who they love. I know that this message will not stomp out all of the abuse, but I hope that the majority of you are mature enough to take what I have said into account and will consider what you say before you send it.

M19" I read aloud to myself when I see that Mason has posted. I feel a pair of arms snake their way around my waist, pulling me closer into his body. Mason.

"Thank you for protecting me today,"

"I'll always protect you,"

Sorry I'm taking ages to write requests, I have been so busy with coursework and homework as of late. That, and posting about 30 things about the match today. So, sorry for the spam, but I hope you enjoyed this request! <33

[cobrakaisb]

Being Best Friends with Hawk and Miguel (HC)

this is my first headcannon, so let me know what you guys think and if you want to see more stuff! :) also this is kinda long (sorry) so just a heads up.

Okay so I like to think that Miguel and Hawk have the same gym class

And you are definitely in that gym class, but didn’t really notice them until they joined Cobra Kai. 

probably because of the mohawk ngl

Anyways

For some reason the three of you end up becoming friends through gym class

I feel like the three of you were on the same dodgeball team 

and it’s just the three of you left

and you, like the boss bitch that you are, stand behind the two instructing them on what to do

and they listen 

and you win

and then yall become instant friends. 

Hawk definitely introduced himself first: “I’m Hawk” + confident smile

your most likely laugh at him, until you realize that he’s 100% serious

Miguel laughs with you tbh

The three of you go from gym buddies, to school friends, to hanging out at each other’s house every other day. 

You all get so close so fast

The three of you definitely have designated movie nights at someone’s house every week where each of you pick a movie and you watch them

sometimes you’ll watch old tv shows like iCarly or Jessie, but it’s mostly movies

You bring out Hawk’s nerd side, but that’s a secret you’ll never tell

“I’m so mad that Dobby died” “Dude same, I’m still not over that tbh” - y/n and Hawk 

The boys are total softies for you. 

“Can we listen to One Direction?” “NO!” “Please 🥺?” “yes” - y/n, miguel & hawk

They both secretly love One Direction, but will never admit that to you

Miguel introduced you to 80s rock and you love it

I feel like Hawk really likes MGK so he gets you into that 

if you’re already into this stuff your obsession only grows

Someone always thinks that the youre dating at least one for them

exchanges looks of disgust: “Eww!” “I have a girlfriend” “Sensei it’s not like that” (i’ll let you guess who says what)

Speaking of sensei, let’s get into the karate aspect of your friendship

The boys beg you to join Cobra Kai, but I feel like you decline 

They respect your decision obvi, but demanded that you learn some for self defense purposes

You go to the all-valley and cheer for the both of them

You probably show up looking like that one kid’s mom (jk unless that’s your style)

You cheer the loudest, but only for Hawk and Miguel

partly because they're your besties and partly because you don’t know anyone else 

When Miguel wins you run onto the mats and give him a hug. It doesn’t matter that you aren’t supposed to be there, he’s surrounded by his Cobra Kai, and hasn’t even got the trophy yet. 

Of course you hug Hawk and probably lecture him for getting disqualified because let’s be real that boy has SKILL

anyways

You go out for nachos with the other cobras and immediately hit it off with Aisha 

You also love Bert, like he literally becomes your adopted child 

I feel like you and Demetri also really get along

This makes the boys happy because now you can all hang together and you’re happy because you just gained three new friends :) 

When Miguel is sulking about Sam you go and comfort him

Like just give him a big hug please 🥺

And then Hawk comes over, and makes his stupid joke about getting blocked and counter punching. 

“Oh I’ll counter punch you!” 

Insert you and hawk play fighting until Miguel laughs

When they find out about Robby you find out about Robby because those boys have no sense of personal space 

“We should ask sensei.”

 “No you shouldn’t! He’ll probably make you scrub mats”

You then proceed to meet them at cobra Kai after practice 

And are waiting there for an extra hour on your bike 

When they come out you make some smart ass comment about how you were right 

You watch their performance at valley fest and seriously consider joining karate

The boys are so excited 

Hawk pulls out the fake to celebrate

Sensei Lawrence loves you

“So are you Diaz’s girl?” “Uh no sir” “oh my bad I should’ve known you were with hawk” “we are just friends sensei” 

Johnny doesn’t buy it 

Anyways back to you joining 

Kreese scares you and you find him sus

He’s high key the reason you back out of karate

The boys are sad along with Bert and Aisha, but understand that it’s not for you

When Hawk beats up Demetri at the mall you never find out about it 

Until Moon breaks up with him for it

And he calls you crying and confesses everything 

You’re angry at him but realize that he needs comfort so you push your feelings aside because he’s still your friend

Miguel tells you about him trashing miyagi-do 

That’s where you draw the line and confront the both of them 

“You guys are different and I don’t like it.” 

They both deny any changes, especially Hawk

You start avoiding them and they don’t get it

You don’t show up to moons party or anything because you don’t want to see them so the first day of school fight is a shock to you

You’re disappointed in Miguel for kissing Sam when he was clearly with Tory 

But you don’t want them to fight about it 

You meet Hawks eyes in the hallway and he’s silently telling you to stay out of it 

Because even though you aren’t on great terms right now he still cares about you 

Which is exactly what you do

You saw Miguel fall and cried instantly 

You were by his side with hawk, crying into his shoulder because Miguel wasn’t waking up 

“What if he dies and we weren’t even on good terms. He’s my best friend I can’t lose him without apologizing ” “Don’t talk like that he’ll be fine”

You and Hawk visit him everyday at the hospital 

You’ll tell him about your day and Hawk will sometimes add things in that you forget

“So we had a quiz in math-” “And y/n cried” “problem four was hard okay!?!”

You aren’t there when Miguel wakes up but you and Hawk go see him 

You cry when you see that Miguel’s awake and hug him gently 

You start apologizing and ranting about how much you love him and how worried you were and how you aren’t mad at him anymore 

Miguel reassured you that it’s fine and he understands why you were mad

He also points out how close you and Hawk are, but you quickly shut that down 

You help out at the car wash for Miguel 

When the cobra kais show up you tell them to leave because this was for your friend Miguel, and it didn’t matter who brought him the money

You find out about Hawk beating up Nathaniel from Demetri 

It’s safe to say you and Hawk aren’t as close anymore but still friends 

It’s when you found out about him breaking Demetri’s arm that you cut Hawk off completely 

“I can’t be friends with a bully”

That breaks Hawk, but he pretends like it doesn’t affect him

You and Johnny help Miguel try to walk again 

You’re more there for emotional support 

But Miguel appreciated it 

When Miguel can walk again you’re so happy 

Probably cry tbh

And give him a very big hug and kiss on the cheek 

When Miguel gets back together with Sam, you’re so happy for him even though you aren’t her biggest fan

When Miguel tells you that Johnny is opening up a new dojo you sign up instantly 

Miguel is SHOOK

“I felt so helpless at the school fight, I want to learn”

When Cobra Kai shows up to Eagle Fangs practice at the park Hawk is shocked to see you standing next to Miguel 

He also feels a little jealous that you picked Miguel over him 

When Kreese makes a comment about Miguel being paralyzed you're ready to pounce but Miguel and Johnny hold you back 

You’re at the LaRusso house when Cobra Kai attacks 

Instead of Demetri’s arm almost being broken again it’s you in that position 

Hawk sees and is filled with rage 

Because he still cares about you

He takes out the two boys and apologizes to you

You hug him, happy to have him back

Together you finish the fight 

You Hawk and Miguel go find Sam with Tory

“Traitors. You better watch your back,” “He won’t have to. He’s got friends watching it for him bitch”

Miguel and Hawk are surprised by your new attitude yet can’t help but feel proud 

All in all despite everything the three of you are the best of friends and nothing seems to change that.

[k3rm1e]

hey bestie!!

could I request a georgenotfound x male(or gender neutral) baker reader who comes onto one of George’s streams to help him bake and wearing one of George’s hoodies and chat just,, freaks out cause they didn’t know he was dating someone

cake

hey bestie!!

could I request a georgenotfound x male(or gender neutral) baker reader who comes onto one of George’s streams to help him bake and wearing one of George’s hoodies and chat just,, freaks out cause they didn’t know he was dating someone

hi anon! this has taken a long while, so i’m sorry about that. but this is here now so yeah, i hope you enjoy <3

cake:

  george was doing another one of his streams except this time, he wasn’t gaming. you could hear him screaming from the kitchen, attempting to bake a cake. why he didn’t ask for your help, you didn’t know. just the other day you had quite literally completed a three tier cake for an old family friend’s daughter’s quinceañera. the intricate gold leaf detailing and the expertly crafted edible roses had taken hours.

  so, you had no clue why george refused to accept your help. he wouldn’t even let you get ingredients. he probably got salted butter instead of unsalted. now he’ll have a salty cake. suits him right.

  you tried to ignore his yells, let him suffer in his own stupidity. but, just imagining the monstrosity of a cake he was making made you grimace in disgust. all he’s doing is disrespecting the art of baking. if anything, it's a stain on your honor. the baking blog that reviewed all the local shops would write, “boyfriend, who’s partner is a baker, cannot bake cakes. instead of helping him, said partner left him to suffer, and in doing so  disrespecting our craft. never purchase another cake from their shop, as they are a vile being and a harm to the baking community.”. you rolled off the couch and face first on the couch, kicking your feet back and forth.

  “fine. fine. i’ll help him. but not because i want to, only to save my honor. that idiot denied my help.” getting up, you marched over to the kitchen, stopping right before the door. you took a breath, and whipped open the door. “George-”

  the kitchen was a mess. there was flour on the counter top and liquid butter in the microwave. george stood in the middle of the kitchen in a whit apron and a chef’s hat, looking very shocked.

  “what did you do to my kitchen!? do you even know what you’re doing?” you marched into the room, pushing him away to survey the damage on the counter. in you hasty anger, you had somewhat forgotten that he was live.

  “uh, nothing love. it’s just a bit of a mess.” he looked guilty, standing behind you with his hands in the air, holding a whisk with powder and egg on it.

  “seriously george, i knew you were bad at cooking, but not this bad. i’ve made cakes in front of you so many times, how are you still seriously so bad at this?” you stared at with your hand on your hips. he was ruining your lovely kitchen. if you were too late in stopping him, he could’ve used your electric mixer. good thing you stopped him.

  “i like your cake! why would i learn how to cook if i can just have you bake for me?” from his headphones you could lightly hear, “ohohoho, what do you mean by you like their cake george~?” and a whisper shouted, “shut up dream!” from george. you would ignore that line of conversation for the time being.

  “george, go grab me paper towels.” he sighed and threw his head back before doing what you told him to.

  as you began to clean up, george started talking to chat. “chat, twitch chat, this is my partner. they bake and are a bit mad that i didn’t accept their help at first.” he put his arms around your neck and put his head on top of yous. “don’t they look good in my hoodie?” he moved your head next to your cheek and you could hear him chuckle when your face got warm. chat was practically having a seizure, spamming about how you’re their new OTP.

  you sighed at george, “go get me the eggs babe.”

  you made the chocolate cake batter, messing around with george the whole time. he got flour everywhere, even spilt the milk. but, after some time you had finally made a cake you could be semi-proud of. did it look good? no. but working in conditions where you have to deal with being live on camera and dealing with a man who can’t bake for his life makes it much better. after ending stream, you guys laid down on the couch. 

  “thank you for not getting mad at meeeeee” george smiled at you as he ate his piece of cake.

  “yeah, you’re lucky i love you.” you kept staring at the tv, intently watching the show.

  “awwwww, you’re so cute.” george moved his head to be on your shoulder.

  you shoved his head off you, pushing him off the couch. “oh, shut the hell up you idiot.”

early post today! this was shorter, but hopefully you guys liked it :)

[lovenhlboys]

From a Distance (E.Pettersson X Reader)

Chapter 1

Masterlist

Tag list form

A/n: hello peoples!! I’m so excited to FINALLY post the first chapter of this fic!!! I’ve been working on it for a long time, and after a few unpleasant delays, it’s finally happening 😁. While this isn’t my first fic, this is my first NHL fic, and the first fic I’m posting on Tumblr, so I’m a little nervous. This first chapter is mostly the set up to the main story, this is reader’s side of things with a flashback story. Chapter two will be mostly from Elias’s point of view. The rest of the chapters will switch back and fourth between the two.

CREDIT: Finally, before we get started I have to shout out my proofreaders. Y’all put up with me and my insanity: @siriushxney @iateyourdonuts @petey-patty @hufflepuff-girlx @cherrylita @immmbabyyygraceee @💕💕And specifically @imagines-r-s ASH!!! Babes, you have been the best and most supportive friend I could’ve asked for during this. You boosted my confidence about this fic and I have no idea what I’d do without you 😁😁

Without further ado, let’s get started shall we!! (Sorry for the long A/N, it’ll only be for this first chapter)

Paring: Elias Pettersson X Fem!Reader

Warnings: lots of cursing, friends with benefits but like...just cuddling???, references to iCarly, mentions of One Tree Hill.

Genere: enemies-ish —>friends —> lovers

Legend: (i suggest having these ready before you read)

Y/C/N/N= your cute nick name, only Markstrom calls you it (you’ll see why) this can be either a pet name you like, or a nick name you already have.

Y/N/N= your nick name, Brock, Quinn, and a few others call you this, it’s more of a playful name. Again, this can be a nickname you already have (if you don’t have one I suggest something stupid (sounds like something Stech or Brock would come up with)

Y/N= this is your first name, only Elias calls you this unless it’s a serious situation, or you’re in trouble, or Brock is being an ass. (If it wasn’t clear before...your last name is Boeser)

Word Count: 2.2k

Summary: you have a hardcore crush on your brothers best friend, who also happens to barely speak to you...it’s a slight predicament.

--------------------------

(This is set in the 2021 season, however, because of my denial, Marky and Stech are still in Vancouver and were never traded... also no Covid. however the season was still delayed just to make it easier to follow.)

Present (Feb. 2021)

You’ve always been best friends with your older brother, you never had any real issues when you were younger and you were inseparable. So much so in fact, that once you graduated early a little less than two years ago (June 2019), he asked you to move to Vancouver and live with him. He was always so protective of you and you appreciated everything he has done in your life. One of the best parts about Brock being your older brother was the people he introduced to you. You aren’t very social and god knows how much of a people person your brother is. Once you had moved in, Brock quickly introduced you to the team. And with your double major in Statistics: Data Sciences and Sports Management, you were able to secure a job with the team. Quickly, you found yourself with a second family, one with many members.

Quinn Hughes is your best friend. when you met him about a year and a half ago, you hit it off immediately. With both of you being the same age and not very social, there was an obvious connection there. When Brock and The boys  go out, it is you and Quinn who stay in and watch shows on the couch (your favorite being New Girl). Huggy Bear is so sweet and you tell him EVERYTHING, even things you’d never tell your brother. You are still thanking the draft lottery every day that the Canucks received the 7th overall pick that gave you your bestie.

Thatcher Demko AKA Dems AKA Thatch AKA baby goalie is the sweetest and most hilarious guy you know. He is always looking after you just like Brock, but he is also one of the most annoying guys you know. When you’d first met you had the biggest crush on him. You told Quinn as much and he gave you so much shit for it. That crush was short-lived though, once you found out how obnoxious he could be. You still love him, just as a friend. Though Quinn never forgets to remind you of the crush that once was.

Bo Horvat is like another big brother to you. Sure you have Brock, but he’s your best friend. Bo, however, is the person you go to when you needed advice. Holly is one of the only WAGs you’ve become close with. She and you consistently have wine and gossip nights, of which Quinn is sometimes in attendance. Plus, you and Quinn are an amazing babysitting team for Gunnar if you have anything to say about it. 

Troy Stecher is the annoying older brother you never had. He always makes fun of you, calls you names, and bullies you in the loving way brothers do. And he never hesitates to come to you if he ever needs girl advice, which seems to happen a lot.

JT was just like Bo, except he is waaay more protective of you, maybe even a bit more than brock. He doesn’t have a sister and when you met, he made it his job to never see you get hurt. Seriously, one day a guy was bugging you at the bar, and both Brock and Bo were struggling to hold him back when he saw him slap you on the ass as you walked away. 

Jacob Markstrom, AKA Marky, AKA Giraffe (pronounced like it is in one of your favorite vines), AKA your cuddle buddy for the past few seasons. Both being single, you felt lonely sometimes and Quinn wasn’t much of a hugger (despite what the nickname might have you believe). Thatcher had offered but Marky, though just as social, is much more laid back. It also helps that he is 6’6 putting him over a foot taller than you. So during movie nights, or late nights at the bar, he is the side you lean on. Of course, you made it abundantly clear to most of the boys and yourselves that you were just friends. As sweet as he was and as great of a boyfriend as he would’ve been, he wasn’t quite your type and your personalities clashed.

Then there was Elias Pettersson, the tall, skinny, Swedish guy you knew as Petey. The guy who looked at you often and barely spoke a word directed towards you. He was Brock's best friend and he came over all the time, you didn’t have an issue with him, and you couldn’t deny he was funny, and from what you’ve heard he is a very kind person. So naturally, he was exactly your type. You’ve had a massive crush on him for a while now, somehow despite the lack of conversation. And the few times he has talked to you, he’s seemed so perfect, but there are only a few times you can remember. 

Right now, as you're on your way to the Canuck’s break room your brother texted you to meet him in, you try to recall those few times, specifically the one where your crush on him truly developed.

--------------------------

FLASHBACK (some time in January, 2020)

--------------------------

You, Quinn, and Jacob were laying on the L-shaped couch in ‘The Boeser apartment’, you were cuddled under the blanket with Jacob, laying on the section perpendicular to the TV, your heads at the corner. Quinn was on the other side of the couch, his head right next to yours. it was about 7 o’clock and the episode of One Tree Hill you were watching had just ended and you three had not eaten dinner yet. As the countdown for the next episode started, your stomach growled and you got a look from Quinn and a giggle from Jacob. 

“You hungry Y/C/N/N?” Jacob asked.

You looked up at him and giggled, “maybe just a little bit.”

“Y/N/N, you know what sounds amazing?” Quinn asked, you could hear the smirk in his voice.

You turned to each other and you both smirked knowing you were thinking the same thing.

“Spaghetti tacos!!” You both said. 

Ever since you were about 10 and you watched iCarly on TV, you had always wanted to try them. It had become an inside joke between you and Quinn for quite some time as he had the same desire as you to see how good they actually were.

“We should totally try them tonight!!” Quinn was quite excited.

“I’m so confused right now,” Jacob chimed in.

“They’re from a show! They take spaghetti and put it in taco shells,” you explained.

“Ahh, hence the name.” he nodded.

“Exactly,” Quinn said.

You jumped up from the couch excitedly and ran straight to your kitchen.

“Ok, we have spaghetti, spaghetti sauce, ground beef, taco shells, aaaand..... by chance do either of you know how to make good meatballs?”

“You’re asking the Swedish guy if he knows how to make meatballs?” Jacob replied.

“Not Swedish meatballs, Italian, stupid Giraffe,” you retorted. 

“Gross,” he said with a disgusted look.

“Ooo my mom made the best Italian meatballs, let me call her to see if she can send me the recipe!” Quinn said with a big smile.

Quinn exited the kitchen and ran to your room to call his mom. 

“You know, I’ve never seen him so excited about anything,” Marky said with a laugh. 

“Quinn loves his food,” you replied.

“Are Brock and Thatch having dinner with us ?”

“I’ll ask.”

You started boiling the water for the pasta, and you cooked part of the ground beef for the meat sauce. Then you texted Brock:

Y/N/N: hey, you want me to make you dinner

Brock: Yeah, who all is there?

Y/N/N: the usual

Brock: Huggy and Marky?

Y/N/N: yep, so do you want some?

Brock: Yeah, and make enough for another person too

Y/N/N: ok

You figured it was Dems since that’s who he went to hang out with when he left 5 hours ago. 

You continued to cook when Quinn came in and grabbed a bunch of stuff from the pantry and cabinets. “Did your mom tell you how to make them?” you questioned your frantic best friend.

“Yes she did and she sent me the recipe too.”

“Coolio,” you reply.

------------------------

You were almost done cooking, the pasta was done, Quinn had put his meatballs in the oven and there were only 5 minutes left on the timer. And the sauce had about 2 minutes to simmer.

“Oh my gosh, I forgot what to do when they're almost done, she does this thing, I have to call her,” Quinn said with a panicked look on his face. He ran back to your room.

The front door to your apartment opened quickly, both boys laughing, “ahh, shit,  my brother’s calling me,” Brock said as he ran back to his room.

“Why does everyone feel the need to exit the room for phone calls?” you asked Jacob.

He shrugged with a giggle, “I don't know, maybe they don’t trust us,” he said in a sarcastically dramatic tone grasping his chest.

The door closed slowly and you glanced at the doorway where you thought you’d see the ever adorable goalie, Thatcher Demko, instead, you saw the adorable, slender, tall blonde you’d seen all the time, but never had a one on one interaction with... except the first time you met, when he told you that you looked pretty.

“Hi, Petey!” Jacob said as he slipped behind you to watch you mix the sauce, he stood over you looking at the sauce and put his hand on your waist.

“Hi,” he replied, his smile from before had faded.

“Looks so good Y/C/N/N,” Jacob said with a kiss on your cheek, a regular action. 

“Thanks, Giraffe, can you grab the taco shells?”

He grabbed them easily from the top shelf (tall ass bitch -_-), and moved behind you, placing his hands on your waist yet again, to move you to the side. “I've gotta run to the bathroom, but I’ll be right back”

“Ok, you have fun with that,” you said with a wink.

Suddenly, was only you and Elias in the room, and the silence was deafening.

“So what are we eating?” he said, pulling your attention to his bright blue eyes.

“Um, spaghetti tacos, they're from a tv sho-”

“Like from iCarly?” he interrupted.

“...Uh yeah? How'd you know?” you couldnt pull your attention away from his eyes, ‘they are just so beautiful,’ you thought somehow you hadnt noticed this within the on and a half years you’d known him.

“We also get Nickelodeon, you know,” he said while throwing you a smirk that made your stomach flip. 

“Oh, I didn't know that,” you replied, feeling just a little embarrassed. 

“iCarly was my favorite, actually.” 

“Yeah, it was mine too,” you said, smiling back, looking at the way he just lit up your kitchen with his presence.

You both stood there for a second just looking at the other, “So how long have-,” he started.

“OKAY,” Quinn unknowingly interrupted, “so she told me what to do, turns out I have to put sauce over them for the last 2 minutes, so Y/N/N can you just put a tablespoon of sauce on each ball then put them back in for two minutes?” 

“Yeah of course. Elias, you were saying?” you looked back at the Swede.

“Oh it's nothing,” he looked down at his shoes. 

“Ok, Y/N/N you need to call mom and tell her we’re fine and that she doesn't need to worry about us please, Paul says she’s stressing,” Brock said as he entered the room.

“When is she not stressing about us? I’ll call her after dinner, how's dad?”

“Doin’ good, nothing has changed or progressed or whatever since we were home last,” Brock moved and sat on the couch letting out a big sigh.

“That’s good,” you let out a sigh.

“Petey, come here, we’re watching Gossip Girl” Brock shouted at the Swede.

“Ooo what episode are you guys on?” you asked. Brock had mentioned how he was making him watch the show you two had watched about 5 times together. 

“Just after Chuck gets Dan kidnapped at Yale.” 

“Oh so you still hate Chuck?” you asked Elias.

“Ew, yeah...wait is that gonna change?” Petey said with a scoff.

“Uh....,” you stalled.

“Y/N shut up, don't spoil it,” Brock interrupted before you could make it worse.

“Ok well, dinner is ready so just start the show after and we can all watch it together.”

--------------------------

“Oh my god, these are actually amazing,” Quinn said with his mouth full.

“I know, I did not think this was gonna taste good,” Jacob added.

“Hey!” you said, offended.

“Y/C/N/N, you know I love your cooking, it was the idea of the meal that I doubted,” Jacob said leaning into your side and putting his arm around your shoulder.

“Mmmhmm, suuure,” you said, rolling your eyes.

“Hallå Marky, ni två är söta (hey Marky, you two are cute),” Petey said, confusing you, Quinn and Brock with the sudden change in language.

Jacob, being oblivious to what Petey was implying, just said, “tack broder (thanks, bro).”

Little did you know what was going on in Elias’s head.

--------------------------

PRESENT

--------------------------

Before that night, you never really thought of Elias in a romantic way. You'd been around him quite a lot, seeing as how, seemingly, is in your apartment more than his own. Sure, you knew he was cute and very sweet from what you'd seen, but up until that point, you'd never had a one-on-one interaction with him. That interaction, however small, was the beginning of an obsessive crush. Quinn was the first to point it out, you started listening closely any time he talked, attempting to converse with him, and thinking about him on a daily basis even when you didn't see him. And due to your stubbornness, no matter how unrequited your crush seemed, it never faltered. You had always thought he hated you, or maybe he just tolerated you because you were Brock’s sister, and you were always around. 

However, that couldn't be farther from the truth.

--------------------------

Tag list: @calgarycanuck @suffering-canucks-fan

[faerielleart]

Hi sorry you don’t have to answer this! But I’ve seen you speak about LGBTQ+ and from my understanding you are a part? So I want to ask I have been dealing with my self identity and struggles and I want to ask if you can share experiences and how you find out since I think I am not straight to be sure… Thank you I hope this ask doesn’t put you in uncomfortable place.

yo anon hello!! 👋 no worries, i’m not in any way uncomfortable and i’m always happy to help if i can

first of all, keep in mind that not everyone’s experiences are the same and what i went through in my journey to exploring my sexual identity might be completely different from what someone else went through, hence take what i say with a huge grain of salt and know that everyone’s experiences are perfectly valid

alright hhhhh well my story’s pretty funny actually LMAO i think i already answered this some other time iirc? but yeah i started “having doubts” in middle school. i wasn’t interested in boys, i was genuinely meh in front of any dude my female friends found cute, i never thought about dating and i never thought about marriage. some people (my family) called me a “late bloomer”, my classmates secretly made fun of me for being “gay”.

thing is, i was obviously gay but i didnt know at the time- however everyone else did 💀💀💀 i was out there saying shit like “i wish men didn’t exist” “i wish the planet was only populated by women” and stuff like that on the DAILY and each time my classmates looked at me like 👁👄👁 and it was like the class’ inside joke that i wasn’t a part of. i was bullying victim unfortunately and i was the class punching bag 🚶‍♀️

one day, i was at my (at the time) best friend’s birthday party and all the girls in class were invited with some boys to her house. i remember we were playing truth or dare, my turn came and i chose truth; there was this girl who hated me with all her heart for no reason whatsoever and loved humiliating me while pretending to be my friend and i was too much of a pushover to say anything to her, anyway bitch started laughing and yelled in front of everyone “IS IT TRUE THAT YOU’RE A LESBIAN?????” and i was ,,,,, pretty much shocked. firstly i thought that was a dirty word, i had never known lesbians irl and i only knew gay men and i kinda associated lesbians with something taboo? i think i was maybe 11 or 12 years old but it was all peer influence, i was lucky to have parents who were never homophobic and never taught me to hate? so this “hesitation” towards this word was something that was instilled into me by my schoolmates who treated it as if it was something shameful and to make fun of. anyway, i told that girl to mind her own business and i was silent and sulking for the rest of the party.

several days later i was at the mall with my parents who asked me what was wrong bc i had been behaving weirdly since the party and i remember telling them exactly “we were playing a game and [girl’s name] asked me if i were…” and i didn’t finish the sentence. “if you were?” and i still was hesitant to answer but then i said “gay” in a really small voice and i remember getting super flustered and feeling so embarrassed?? and my parents just looked at each other and i think that was the start of everything lol in the next years through middle and high school i was so confused about myself i was refusing to label myself bc i thought i was “figuring myself out” and for a long while i thought i was bisexual. i used to tell my ex best friend about these doubts that i had and she was always a bit weird about it 🧍‍♀️

she randomly asked me shit like “do you wanna have sex with a guy? if you had a boyfriend would you have sex with him? would you suck his dick?” and shit like that and i always was so embarrassed about answering those questions? because my answer was always a straight up no, but i thought something was wrong with me if i didnt wanna do stuff with men. despite that, i still didnt truly question my attraction to men, i just went “yeah i mean all girls secretly think that men are ugly right that’s normal” for SO MANY YEARS LOL i thought everyone had the same experience??? i reached the point where i was 100% sure of my attraction to girls and i was forcing myself to be attracted to men as well bc “that’s the right thing for me”. i forced myself to be enthusiastic when my friends talked about boyfriends, i forced myself to pretend to have a crush on celebrities and THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING BUT LIKE ONE TIME I WAS WATCHING THIS TV SHOW WITH MY MOM AND THERE WAS I THINK ORLANDO BLOOM AS A GUEST AND I GOT THE IDEA OF PRETENDING TO BE HAPPY TO SEE HIM BC I THOUGHT HE WAS “THE MOST BEAUTIFUL MAN EVER” AND I SPENT LIKE HALF AN HOUR INSISTENTLY TELLING MY MOM “LOOK AT HIM HE IS SO ATTRACTIVE OH I AM SO IN LOVE WITH HIM” TO SHOW MY MOM I LIKED MEN 💀💀💀💀💀💀 I DID THAT A LOT IT’S LIKE I WANTED VALIDATION FOR IT i want to bury myself in sand thinking of this

anyway after an extremely failed coming out to my grandma whom i saw for the first time ever expressing disgust at the thought of me potentially being attracted to women i was terrified to do it again and i refused to tell any other member of my family. i still haven’t truly come out and i don’t think i ever will tbh even if i know my parents would love me and accept me regardless i still think of my grandma’s reaction and i start legit crying whenever i think of that

march 2020 comes and i finally accept that i am a lesbian. how did that happen? i was watching harry potter and i went “holy shit i wanna fuck hermione” literally that’s it nothing else. nothing else. that was that. that’s how i knew 100% i was a lesbian and i was tired of pretending i wasn’t. don’t ask me why, don’t ask me how but that’s literally what happened.

and that’s when everything started making sense tbh? like i just felt as if i had a huge huge burden lifted off myself for the first time ever? i said it out loud and i felt happy? the more i said it, the happier i felt? through the years i had always known deep down i didn’t like men, i was just pretending i was, comp-het was hitting me SO HARD and then finally i stopped letting it influence me.

what helped me was asking myself extremely specific questions after that to be sure, in the same fashion my ex bestie used to be weird about it when i “came out” to her. i imagined myself in really specific situations with fantasy boyfriends, i asked myself what i liked about men and the answer was always “nothing”, i asked myself “could i be capable of falling in love with a man?” and the way i was setting standards so high and ridiculous for any human for my “dream man” was the obviously negative answer to that question, i asked myself more intimate questions like “if it came down to it would you ever actually sleep with a man?” and the answer was always a solid no. basically putting myself in theoretical situations is what helped me finally understand. i had done that through the years and my answers were the same since the beginning, but i still refused to admit the truth to myself, until one day i just stopped.

and that’s my journey LOL it’s kinda pathetic tbh,,,,,, i could’ve been much happier with myself if i had just admitted it to myself since the beginning, bc deep down i always knew. would’ve spared me years of not feeling okay with myself, would’ve spared me years of surrounding myself with the wrong people who caused me terrible pain every time i heard them say lesbians are disgusting. but anyway, what’s done is done and i’m just happy now i get to be free and accept myself for who i am, unapologetically. on the internet. bc in real life i’m still traumatized 🚶‍♀️

i think questions are the easiest place to start. imagine yourself in situations, ask yourself how would you act and why. figure yourself out bit by bit and take your time to understand what you like. don’t ever let yourself feel pressured by anyone, don’t even let yourself feel pressured by the need of labels. don’t let anyone tell you your experiences are wrong or not valid, don’t let anyone tell you there’s a set way to explore your identity, don’t force yourself to do anything you’re not comfortable doing. if you need to vent, my dms are always open. be happy exploring your identity, there is no right way to do it. and remember that you’re always valid. 💜

[m4nicfx4ti0n5]

All I got from your response to that anon is that you’d rather ship bbrae when there is incest. Ryan himself said Gar is crushing on Rachel. but you still think they’re siblings😹 do you even have siblings..? You need to name and shame your university. Kory picking up on Gar’s feelings and telling him he wants to kiss Rachel. Dick saying Gar and Rachel are cute together. Rose calling Rachel Gar’s girlfriend… if that was his sister why wouldn’t he just say it when Kory and Rose said those things to him? Wouldn’t you be disgusted if someone thought you wanted to date your sibling? Wouldn’t you shut that shit down immediately? And these are things being seen and picked up on by the others. Their actual scenes together alone show their interest in each other. Not to mention that there is a clear parallel being drawn between dickkory and garchel. The problem is you and the others are trying to be holier than thou when you don’t need to be. The writers and directors know what they are doing. That’s why it obviously hasn’t happened all at once and why we see more of it from Gar’s side. Like the person said it probably won’t be physical on screen but something will definitely happen this season. No need to clutch pearls.

wow y’all are REALLY in your feels over this I don’t know why we’re taking this so seriously...but let’s circle back to this violent/aggressive language that two DIFFERENT anons have perpetuated and break this whole thing down.

1. You guys really ship BBRae...congratulations. Stand for your ship but don’t be a dick.

2. “name and shame your university” I endured four years at a Big 10 PWI as an African American female. Ain’t no shame in that, honey.

3. If you would like to have a non-aggressive, creative discussion about our differences in opinion and consider the way the actors play their characters ever-so-slightly against the intentions of the writing, I’m all ears. (I can chat for hours about how Ryan Potter PLAYS Gar hardly matches up with what’s on the page considering how much they’ve half-assed his character on this show.)

4. Um...incest? who said dat? And I don’t think of them as siblings so much as besties. (Idk if I said sibling earlier or not, but I imagine them more as homies 🤷🏽‍♀️) You CAN have close platonic relationships with the opposite sex but idk if y’all ready or WILLING to have that conversation PEACEFULLY.

5. Also, I’d like to reiterate, WE DO NOT NEED TO AGREE ON EVERYTHING. For example, many of you actually like this show while I hate watch it.

6. No body has acted “holier than thou” nor posted anything that could remotely be interpreted that way and I don’t appreciate this sort of inaccurate projection onto me, a faceless tumblr user you have never met.

7. If you plan come at me like this, hiding as an anon is a cop out. You got something to say, that’s cool. You disagree with me, that’s fine. But don’t come with this type of energy in anonymity. Stand your ground.

8. Also, I have a question for you and the previous anon...why do you feel so passionately about this ship in particular? Or better this VERSION of the ship? Why does it get you this heated? Even if I disagree or am dead wrong and they do end up romantically linked at some point, that won’t change that I didn’t see it, feel it, want it, etc???

Like I get it, some of you are REALLY passionate about BBRae on this show. That is YOUR prerogative. Do I strongly dislike the notion of a minor and an adult playing characters that are romantically linked? Yes I do. (I’m looking at High School Musical: The Musical: The Series too.) Regardless of the CHARACTER ages I think we should simply STOP casting huge age gaps like that with minors in particular. If Teagan was older or Ryan was younger I wouldn’t feel as strange. It’s just odd. TO ME.

Y’all live how y’all live tho ain’t nobody mad at you! No one is saying YOU are weird or gross for being okay with it. I just have my own PERSONAL philosophies 🤷🏽‍♀️

Also, you can disagree with me in my ask without being mean ok like these sorts of discussions and differences of opinion come with the territory of subjective mediums like film, tv, writing, music, etc. there is no right or wrong even in canon. So many moments in this show out side of this ship that I disagreed with fundamentally even as they played out on screen. I hate how the show is written IN GENERAL. But that’s a whole other discussion.

I hope you also feel better tho now that TWO OF YOU have come in here guns blazing. I need a damn DRINK 😆

[orangeseoks]

Trouble Maker // j.jk

part one - part two here

[ disclaimer! ]

this is of pure fiction and is NOT to be taken seriously!

genre ;; fluff, smut, angst | hybrid au

pairing ;; jungkook x reader, hybrid!jk x reader, (kinda) namjoon x reader.

notes ;; jungkook is a horny mf, reader is a virgin *cOuGh*, mentions of abuse, a few fights happen here and there, namjoon is a complete dork, (y/n) and namjoon are besties uwu, eventual smut, jk randomly finds porn, masterbation, (y/n) fights with her family + daddy issues, highschool is hard, jk has a virgin kink, surprise heats, jk has wet dreams (ovo; ).

warning ;; there may be quite a bit of fob in here, idk

[ unedited ]

[ all rights reserved @orangeseoks​ ]

"Wake up will you," a voice blares from beside me. I quickly jolt awake and look around me, "y-yes?" Rubbing the sleepiness from my eyes I stretch in my spot and sigh, glancing at the workbook I'd dumped so carelessly onto the floor. "You're such an idiot, why do I even bother with you?" Namjoon answers with a laugh.

"Namjoon, seriously? I'd only passed out, geez." Rubbing my temple, I stand up, a slight giggle passing my lips as I start collecting the few items I'd scattered around me. I'm normally at home around this time, not often do I sleep during studies at Namjoon's. 

I gently pack my things into my bag and make my way to the front door, slipping my shoes on. "Do you want a ride home?" He asks, tucking his car keys into the pocket of his pants.

Shaking my head I give Namjoon a soft smile, "I'll walk, it's okay."

"You sure? It's almost half past eleven," I merely nod and open the door. "If anything I'll take the bus home, see you!" Waving the older male goodbye, I run outside of his small house and down the street.

Namjoon, he's a lot older than me, like a lot. He's an adult and I'm still a student, many would think he's my tutor or something - but he's just a long time friend. Weird?

Humming to myself, I kick a stone on the pavement before I turn down an alleyway between two houses. This was my usual route home from Namjoon's place, it was a neat shortcut. It was always the best way to avoid a long walk, sometimes even people, I guess it’s just a fast escape. When I see the road come into view my smile widens, just across the street was a small corner store and I was dying to eat something.

Crossing the silent street, I make my way towards the store, accidentally inhaling the cigarette smoke from the group of males outside the laundromat. Coughing, I enter and begin to roam the few isles they had, grabbing a few snacks here and there. The smell of cigarette smoke still lingered in the air but it wasn't as strong as it was outside.

"Is this all?" The cashier asks me, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose. "Yep," is all I respond with, taking out my wallet to pay for everything. "Which school do you go to?" The woman suddenly asks me whilst she packs everything into a re-usable bag, "oh um.. that school just down the street, I forgot the name." I let out a faint chuckle, my cheeks growing a faint pink.

"Ah, my daughter goes there too." With a warm smile the woman hands me everything, "be careful walking home it's cold out."

"Thank you," bowing slightly I exit the store, that disgusting smell hitting me like a truck. Scoffing, I cover my nose and cross the street in a hurry.  

A little before I got home, I'd decided to stop at the bus stop just a house away from mine. And now here I am, sitting there as I eat the sandwich I'd purchased. Watching the few cars that pass by me, "are you jumping busses too?" Flinching, I turn around to face the voice - swallowing my mouthful in a hurry. "N-No, I'm just sitting here to eat." Smiling shyly I fold the parchment paper that once was wrapped around my sandwich, lowering my gaze to the concrete below my feet.

"At midnight? That's new," the voice adds. Nodding I shift awkwardly in my spot, "I'm not going to hurt you, I'm only waiting for the bus."

"S-Sorry, I'm not used to this sort of thing."

"Me, social interaction or bus jumping?" The voice asks playfully, a small laugh passing through their words. "All of them I guess," embarrassed with myself I mentally facepalm - slouching in my spot. "Don't be, I'm only dressed differently." Confused as to why they've pointed that out, I glance up at them, noticing how they really are dressed differently. They're wearing a hat, baggy clothes and a .. collar? Or maybe it's a choker?

I clear my throat and nod, "not really. I mean, other people dress like that."

"Yeah well I'm not like other people," the voice answers, headlights hitting the both of us. My eyes widen when I see a glimpse of the persons face, they're beautiful. "Here's my bus," they finish - standing and entering the large vehicle. Leaving me and my lonesome once more, shaking my head I stand also, grabbing both my bags and walking the remainder of my way home.

Sighing, I look up at my steep driveway, never getting over how tiring it is to walk up it. "I'm home," I mutter sarcastically. A fake smile painting my features as I walk up it. When I reach the top of my driveway, I begin shaking open my gate, not failing to notice the obvious movement in the bushes behind my fishpond.

Furrowing my eyebrows together, I walk toward the bushes closing the front gate behind me and then pushing open an entrance for me, so I’m able to pass through the crowded greenery. "..Hello?" I ask the darkness of night, sighing at my actions I look around the area and see nothing. That is until I spot two perky ears twitching. "Oh-" Kneeling down, I move the rock the animal is hiding behind, spotting the small thing and frowning at its appearance.

"Poor thing, let's get you inside." I gently pick up the bunny and cradle it in my arms despite the constant thrashing it makes. I hum at this, rubbing gently behind its ears whilst I take out my keys, I unlock the unit house I'm living in and switch on the lights, placing the animal onto my kitchen table to examine it.

The poor bunny was coated in thick mud, a deep slash in one of their back legs, along with a few other cuts on them. “Lets clean you up, yeah?” With a gentle smile, I pick the bunny up and walk over to the kitchen - filling the sink with warm water.

“You’re safe now little bunny,” I affirm, turning the tap off and placing the tiny animal into the shallow pool of water. A small chuckle leaves my lips, watching as it squirms slightly when coming in contact with the warm liquid. Smiling, I get myself a cup and collect a bit of water to pour over the top of the bunny. Combing my fingers through its slightly over grown locks, I untangle a few of the knots in its fur before beginning to scrub the mud away.

I let out a faint laugh when the little bunny presses itself into the palm of my hand, “do you like me washing your fur?” As if it understands me, their ear twitches and they hop into my free palm. Smiling, I wet its ears, softly massaging the fur with my fingers, being sure not to apply too much pressure knowing how sensitive rabbit ears can be.

“I’m almost finished little bunny,” giggling, I wash away any extra muck before transferring the small animal to a clean tea towel, wrapping it neatly around the bunny’s small frame and returning to the kitchen table to dry it. Humming, I eventually finish drying the bunny and run my hands along its damp fur, “sit tight I’ll be right back.”

And I was, I’d left and come back in the span of only three minutes. A first aid kit in hand, sitting in front of the bunny I notice how it awakes from what I’m assuming was their sleep. “I’m going to treat your leg alright, it may hurt so I’m sorry in advanced.” With a concentrated sigh, I look at the injured leg, feeling somewhat relieved to see it looking better now that its been cleaned of whatever gunk was in it.

I apply a bit of an ointment onto the little bunny’s leg before wrapping it in a bandage, “jang! All done!” Clapping my hands together, I let a grin fall onto my lips whilst I pick the bunny up, pulling it into my chest for hug. “You’re such a good little bunny! I’m so proud of you!”

With a giggle I glance at the clock next to the tv, instantly frowning when I notice how late it is. I should be sleeping, but instead I’m cuddling with a stray rabbit. Sighing, I comb my bangs back and make my way to my bedroom, turning the lounge light off behind me.

“You can sleep with me tonight hun,” crawling into bed I place the small bunny into the arms of one of my teddy bears, smiling when it curls into the plush toy. Yawning I bid the bunny goodnight and fall asleep myself.

As sunlight passed through the bedroom curtains, I feel myself begin to stir in my sleep, groaning I turn towards my wall. A giggle leaving my lips as a tiny tongue flicks along my neck, licking at my skin, with a shaky laugh I open my eyes - a familiar little bunny coming into view. Smiling, I pick the rabbit up, rolling onto my back and holding it in the air.

“I think I might keep you, call you mine.”

Chuckling, I sit up and place the bunny into my lap, petting the small creature. “I’m (Y/n), and you’re..” Pausing for a moment I look around my room for a name idea, then it hits me. “You’re Jungkook!”

I watch as Jungkook jumps up, pawing at my shirt, “someones excited!” I exclaim happily, picking Jungkook up and checking the bunny for a split second. “You’re a boy Jungkook!” I yell, clearly as excited as him.

ding!

Cutting myself and Jungkook from our moment, I listen to my phone go off beside me, sighing I unlock it and read my messages with a frown. A deep groan falls from my lips, tossing my phone onto the floor carelessly - as if it’ll relieve my irritation.

“Namjoon’s coming over, Jungkook, he’s a friend of mine. He’s going to help me finish my leftover work,” smiling I cradle the tiny male bunny in my arms. Running my hand gently along his back, watching his small tail twitch. Giggling I grab his tail between two fingers and massage the area around it.

“Come on, I need to change, help me pick out my outfit.”

Jumping out of bed, I make it quickly, rearranging my soft toys and such. I then take out a few things from the set of drawers I have sitting in the corner of the room. 

“Which one? Twitch either your left or right ear to tell me,” I utter holding up both the chosen pieces of clothes.

The bunny’s head only tilts to the side, his right ear twitching, grinning I nod and make a hurry to take off the shirt I was sleeping in, pulling on the large sweater and shorts.

“Ta-da!” I do a little twirl, laughing when Jungkook jumps in his spot, his large doe eyes glistening in the natural light. Scoffing, I shake my head, a wide smile still plastered on my face when I open my curtains and windows.

Turning to Jungkook, I watch as he jumps down from my bed, landing on his side with a small squeak. I let out a snicker watching in awe at the clumsy bunny. His little legs working hard as he runs over to me, snuggling himself into my ankle. “Come on bub,” I murmur picking Jungkook up and walking into the kitchen to boil the jug as-well-as place a few pieces of bread into the toaster.

“What should you have for breakfast?” Looking down at Jungkook, I smile, shuffling over to the fridge - tearing a leaf of lettuce away from its body and grabbing an apple to go with the green he’s going to eat, “sorry if you don’t like it. I’ll try and buy you bunny food on Thursday, hm?” Chuckling, I jump a little with every step I take; rocking Jungkook like an infant in my arms.

“I’ll cut your lettuce and apple so its easier for you to eat,” pressing a chast kiss to Jungkook’s fur, I place him on the bench beside me whilst I cut the lettuce into strips. The faint sound of rain hitting the roof filling my ears, I sigh at this and place the shredded lettuce onto a small plate. Moving onto his apple, I begin to cut that too, eventually finishing that and placing the tiny chunks onto the plate also - moving onto my breakfast once I’ve placed his food onto the table.

Placing a couple slices of bread into the toaster, I take out the butter along with the jam as I wait for my toast to pop up. 

I jump when my toast is ready, laughing at myself for being oblivious to it. Humming a song to myself, I butter my toast - blah blah. And then walk over to the table, giggling when I see Jungkook face first in his food; his cheeks stuffed with his breakfast. 

“Cute,” I mutter, taking a bite of my toast and listening to the pelting rain hit the roof of my home. “I hope Namjoon doesn’t catch a cold, he’s probably drenched.”

Speaking of the devil.

My eyebrows raise as my front door slides open, Namjoon rushing inside and tossing his keys onto the shoe shelf beside him, he sighs and removes his wet coat - draping it over the back of a kitchen chair. “Unlock your door next time,” he complains, sitting down and combing back his dripping bangs.

“Sorry,” I say, “I didn’t expect you over so early. Its only ten,” Namjoon nods in response. His eyes shifting from me to Jungkook - too immersed in his feasting to notice the male in the room. “You bought a rabbit..?” He asks, examining the animal with his eyes, “no.” Is all I respond with, finishing off the last of my toast.

“I found his last night, his leg was injured so I took him in.”

Namjoon sighs, “what is it has some type of disease and you catch it?”

“I won’t, he’s healthy, a little beaten is all.” I smile sadly, moving my hand to pet Jungkook as he eats. “Do you plan on telling your dad?” He asks, plucking an untouched chunk of apple from Jungkook’s plate and tossing into his mouth.

I scoff, “no. Like he’s going to find out, he’ll only make me pay for everything myself, not to mention my sisters.” I find myself shivering at my own words, “if my sisters find out I have a rabbit in my house, they’ll smother the poor thing.”

Laughing, Namjoon nods, “I get it.”

I don’t say a word, only hum and allow Jungkook to hop into my open hand, “how much of the work did I need to finish?”

“Right!” Namjoon starts, placing the small bag he has with his atop of the table, “if I remember correctly you only have to finish your slide for history.” I instantly grin, history is one of my favourite subjects. I so adore history, I’ve always been a fan of the dark and interesting histories and wonders of the world.

According to my friends and mutuals at school I’m a, quote on quote; history whore. 

“Salem Witch Trials, right?” Namjoon asks, cutting me from my thoughts, “yeah, that’s it.” He nods, taking out his notebook as well as a few sheets of paper littered with words and images. “I’ve got some articles printed for you to use as reference.”

Thanking him, I run off to grab my laptop, returning moments later and sitting in my original spot. “I think you only have two slides left to make,” he murmurs, writing a few things into his notebook. I hum, opening my slides and quickly looking through my current work.

One slide left, I think to myself, glancing at the papers given to me. This is going to be interesting.

Groaning, I flop lifelessly onto my sofa, ignoring the grumbling coming from Namjoon. “(Y/n)-”

“Don’t you dare make me work any further, I’ve finished everything.” I retort, not letting Namjoon finish his sentence, he knows how stubborn I can be and decides to leave things at that. “Movie?” He asks, switching the tv on, “no - game.” 

Chuckling, Namjoon stands to grab the two controllers sitting in a drawer before handing me one and starting up a multiplayer game so the two of us can play. “Are you ready to lose?” I chime cockily, knowing how he sucks at this specific video game. “Ha ha, very funny,” he retorts.

I smile at his sarcasm, focusing my attention on the game about to take place, “loser.” I say, mashing furiously at my controller, knocking down Namjoon’s character with a simple punch. The male beside me huffs, puffing his cheeks out, “I’m no loser.”

And he wasn’t lying when he said that, I’d only blinked and my character had been knocked down with a booming k.o! I was shocked; he’d literally just beaten me, me! 

“Kim Namjoon!” I whine, throwing the small device in my hands onto the armchair across from the two of us, instantly jumping onto the broad male - tackling him into the cushioning.

He lets out a low squeak, squirming beneath me with a roaring laugh. He knows how competitive I can get, so why would he make me lose?

“(Y/n)!” He laughs, his hands unconsciously finding my waist as I resume tickling him. “St-Stop!” Furrowing my eyebrows, I pinch his waist before stopping and glaring at him, “thank you.” He pants, rolling over slightly and glancing at a certain spot on the floor.

“Oh hey little guy,” Namjoon spurs, smiling fondly at Jungkook. I notice this and turn my head to face my curious bunny, “come on!” I cheer, kneeling beside the couch and watching as he scrambles over to me. Burying his face into my hands the second he comes up to me.

I can’t help but grin at how cute he is, bringing the small animal towards my chest and cradling him. “He’s so cute Namjoon.”

“Are you going to keep him?” He asks, sitting up after tidying his tussled hair. “Mhm, I decided to keep him once I woke up. There’s no way he’s going back out there, poor thing must’ve been beaten before running off.”

“There’s actually been cases popping up recently of animal abusers, the authorities are trying to find out who exactly is doing this and whether its a group or just individuals, they’re also speculating that its breeder or maybe a owner of sorts.”

He pauses, wetting his lips before continuing;

“Oh- there’s also cases of people seeing .. well other people, but with animal ears and tails. No one has been able to prove if these sightings are true or not, but I guess that’s off topic.”

Shrugging, I continue to gaze at the now sleeping bunny in my arms, a wide smile gracing my lips. “Should we go shopping?” I ask the bunny snuggled into me, knowing it obviously won’t answer me. “Now?” Namjoon questions, walking around me and into my room.

“Yeah,” is all I say as I climb to my feet and place Jungkook onto the couch to retrieve my shoes from my room - a coat hitting me directly in the face upon my entering. “Put that on, it’ll be cold outside.”

“I know,” I say. “I know.”

[the-fiction-witch]

I Hate You P3

TV SHOW: THE QUEENS GAMBIT COUPLE: BENNY X READER RATING: SEXY 

I groaned as I woke up seeing the bright light cascading from the windows and door, Loud music coming from the other room, I groaned sitting up rubbing my eyes. I slipped my robe over my shoulders going out to the rest of the apartment seeing y/n stood at the oven making pancakes, her hair in rollers, in a little blue sleeveless dress slightly dancing to the record player.

"Morning" I groaned

"Morning Husband!" she smiled "Coffee?"

"Uhhh yeah sure"

"Here you go" she smiled handing me a cup of coffee

"Aww thank you wifey" I smiled giving her a kiss "why are all the lights and the music on?"

"Because this is the time I get up benny. Get used to it"

"Fine, see how long you can keep this up when I don't go to bed till like three Am"

"fine, have your coffee darling"

"I shall" I nodded having a sip of my coffee but it tasted terrible, "Ughh! what is this!"

"I made you coffee darling" she smiled

"what did you do to this coffee? what was the exact steps in you making it"

"Coffee powder, milk, Water"

"Okay..."

"I did however use Almond Milk"

"Ughhhhhhhh...." I relused almost being sick "Okay. Thank you dear" I sighed tipping the coffee down the sick "I'm going for a shower"

"Ohh you might want to wait, I used up all the hot water" she smiled "sorry darling"

".... Its fine dear" I sighed starting up the shower and it was a cold as ice, "I'm gonna use your shampoo okay hun I'm out of mine" I told her as I climbed in the shower

"No! benny! it's mine use your own!"

"what's yours is mine darling"

"Fine, Ohh by the way I used your razor to shave my legs"

"... You know what that's not a problem, I wasn't planning on shaving,"

"You should"

"Should I?"

"It would make your wife happy"

"so would a divorce and I'm not giving you that either"

"I'll wax it in your sleep"

"You wouldn't dare"

"Wouldn't I Benny?" she smiled as she did her hair "Ohh I'm having some friends over later by the way"

".... fine. Then I'm having the boys over tomorrow" I told her as I climbed out my shower I smirked and dried off then threw my towel on the floor and wrapped my robe around me she seemed annoyed with me already "Feel free to leave me wifey, It's only going to get worse"

"Ohh is it now? well I'm going to stay put, I know I can last longer then you"

"why so sure darling?"

"Ohh I'm two days out from my period benny. You ready for it?"

"are you now? How about I start getting really into Diy projects that I will never complete"

"How about I get really into cooking and constantly make terrible foods"

"I'm never buying a dish washer"

"I'm gonna get a cat"

"I swear to go I will stat having chess themed orgies in this house, with or without your participation"

"I going to take a female lover"

".... Actually I'm fine with that. In fact I'd be slightly into it" I shrug "I will..."

"You'll what?"

"I will get you so fucking pregnant, you'll give birth to fucking twins or worse"

"My god do I hate you"

"I hate you too" I smiled pulling her to kiss me she resisted at first but happily kissed me back wrapping her arms around me tightly

"You'd be into me having a side girlfriend?"

"Kinda yeah? If you'll let me watch"

"You're disgusting" she sighed going to the bedroom

"what! It's hot!" I complain following her but she threw my jeans at me

"Put pants on!"

"My house! I can walk around naked if I want"

".... Damn it I can't you'll enjoy it"

"I will" I nodded "Infact could you, like seriously. that would be very very nice wifey" I smirked cuddling her from behind

"Hands off unless your going to fuck me benny," she laughs pushing me off her "Can't try this sugar sweet before you buy" she smirked playing with her hair and shaking her ass at me so much her dress physically moved from side to side with her shaking

"I thought I had bought it. considering... we are married."

"Don't you poke holes in my sexy analogy"

"Maybe I would have had sex with you if you'd given me a minuet"

"Nope! dwindling to none existent sex life. Welcome to married like benny watts"

"Our sex life is not dwindling if I have anything to say about it"

"Who said you did?"

"Our sex life is not going anywhere" I smirked grabbing her pulling her to my chest and grabbing her ass "Not at least till give got you pregnant y/n"

"You are never getting me pregnant"

"Aren't I?" I smirked "Just you try and stop me"

"Even if you do I'll make sure there all girls, all hate chess and want nothing to do with there father"

"You have no control about that honey, I do remember. so I'll make sure there all chess playing, messy, dirty little boys who all look just like me"

"I hate you"

"I hate you too" I smiled pulling her to kiss me.

I sat at the table working on my next book, Y/n came in bringing the last two crates of beer in she had borrowed my car or well she took my keys without telling me she was getting beer in for her 'freinds' she had visiting tonight,

"who have you got coming tonight anyway?"

"My friends"

"what friends?"

"My poker friends"

"I thought you poker friends was luke and everyone?"

"Ehh some of them yes"

"You have other friends?"

"I assume you have other friends then just lukes and your chess guys?"

".... I do not"

"Ohh. Well I do" she shrugs taking the beer to the kitchen i tried to take one but she slapped my hand "Not for you"

"Owww..." I complained "How many people are coming then?"

"A few"

"A few?"

"Just some poker friends, some biker friends, and Dan he's my bestie"

"Is he now?"

"will you just chill. also pack your chess board away unless you want it broken"

"why?"

"Because It'll get broken if you leave it there" she laughs

"I am growing more and more concerned about your friends"

"Yeah and I've been concerned about yours since I met them"

"Have you?"

"The boys are weird"

".... I'll give you that" I sighed

"Benny?"

"Yeah?" I sighed as I put my board away

"I don't like your clothes."

"You have mentioned that many times y/n"

"what! you do dress like a cowboy porn star!"

"Okay the cowboy I get where are you getting porn star?"

"The weird caterpillar you keep above your mouth"

"You love it" I smirked as I put it away

"But seriously benny I don't like your clothes"

"Okay?"

"Take them off"

"...Ohh" I laughed "Something you wanted wifey?" I smirked leaning on the kitchen counter beside her

"Nope just wanted to make you hard so I can abandon you" she smirked groping my dick though my jeans and then walking off

"You are evil"

"yep" she smiled as the door knocked "Get the door please husband"

"Yes wifey" I sighed going to the door as it was pounding by now, I opened it and almost gulped seeing the gang of tall, muscular, burley, heavily tattooed, leather jacket wearing men with bags and boxes of beer. "Uuuuuhhhh Hello" I smiled

"Y/n?"

"Uhh Yes, that uh that's uhh she's over there" I told them letting them all in,

"Ahhh my boys!" she smiled hugging them each tightly, once they where all inside I shut the door as they opened the first box of beer, My god she's turn my flat into a biker bar.

"y/n? are they going to kill me?" I whispered to her

"Maybe if you piss them off. wouldn't be the first time" she smiled as she walked off to chat with some others

"Wait- what? what do you mean wouldn't be the first time?" I asked her "Y/n? Y/n? Don't leave me alone" I whined following her carefully

"Benny watts are you scared?"

"Yes! this is little the first time in my life I'm NOT the most insane man in the room." I told her "I know I like to stick out but this... this is in a way I don't like"

"Boys?" she called making them all silence and look at us "Don't murder my husband...." she smiled

"That's it?"

"Don't murder my husband... Please?"

some nodded but most just returned to their conversations, their beer's or other such things, Y/n walked off to put some of her records on, and helped out one of the guys with something.

I mostly just sat at the table trying not to get in the way as my apartment was full of these... well biker guys, The smell of cigarette smoke wafting across the air, as well as the smell of beer, motorbike oil, and cannabis. The empty pile of cans and bottles of beer piling high by the door, The rock music blaring, men shouting and swearing at each other. Some guys arm wrestling others betting on it, spilling beer across the side, another group was doing something with vodka shots I wasn't sure, Y/n had helped one guy set up all the cushions on the floor like a bed and he had a little... let's call it improvised tattoo machine and sat cross legged smoking something as he did tattoo's on other guys, often he would pass the cigarette to y/n as she went around gathering empty bottles, checking on various things. as much as it wasn't my scene I loved how... she's kinda the queen of this shit, on anything she had the final word, on beer's, on who won games, everything went though her.

"Come on Baby? where's my sugar?" One guy asked sitting in the leather chair trying to pull her onto his lap

"Oi! hand's off Pete, ladies busy" she argues pushing his hands off her

"Besides, little ladies married now" Another guy spoke up from the table

"Yeah, how'd that little weasel get his hands on my baby?" He smirked more to y/n then anyone else

"Reasons" she smirked winking to me,

"Hey? Watts right?" he asked to me

"Yeah" I nodded

"You party?" he asks offering me a cigarette

"Uhhh no. No thanks"

"Whatever, fun little hubby you got y/n" He smirked pulling her onto his lap

"He's fun" she smirked getting off his lap "sometimes" she smiled as she walked past giving my cheek a kiss

"Y/n? your up" The guy called as he finished up the last guys tattoo

"wait your getting another tattoo?" I asked her

"No just touching up mine" she smiled "You wanna come hold my hand benny?" she whines playfully

"Alright" I smiled holding her hand so she dragged me over she laid on the pillows as this guy looked her tattoo over. He was taller then me, muscular and toned, Tattoo's covering every inch of his body, he was shirtless with only a pair of jeans and some suspenders, he sat cross legged on the cushion as he cleaned his needles and got some ink ready in a little glass dish "Y/n are you sure this is... sanitary on our floor?"

"Our floor's cleaner then the shop I got this done in" she laughs tapping the ottoman so I sat on it and took her hand "I don't really need you, I did it last time with just a lollipop and a foul mouth" she laughs "But... give you practice" she winks

"We good?" He asked her and she nodded and he started, it was only fascinating to see him touching up the colours and lines of her dragon even if at times it felt like she was going to break my hand till he took a break to change the colour or needle I don't know,

"fucking hell" I complain shaking my hand where it had gone numb

"Ohh this is nothing wait till I have a baby"

"Hell no, I'm waiting in the husband room with a paper"

"No your not your going to hold my hand that or stare at the human forcing its way out of me. either way" she smirked

"That is if you have a baby?"

"Like your not gonna get me pregnant" she smiled giving my lips a sweet kiss

"I might" I winked

"You don't I will" That Pete guy smirked

"You're done" The guy told her and she smiled sitting up

"You're turn"

"what? no way!"

"Awww what's the matter benny? You scared?" she smirked "I knew you wouldn't" she giggled as she got up "Guess I have a better pain tolerance then you,"

"I could sit though it y/n. I just don't... want anything"

"I bet you can't"

"I bet I can"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah!"

"Put your money where your mouth is then watts." she smirked the room going quiet

"Yeah? Okay. If I do it you have to stop this stupid competing." I told her and she seemed shocked "we call the bets off, all of them"

"and what would we do about... everything?"

"I get to give in. and stay married to you. as long as I want"

"Humm found of your wifey now are you watts?" she smirked wrapping her arms around my neck

"I am. no more fighting, No more dares. and you stay my wife" I told her wrapping my arms around her waist

"And if you can't do it? If your chicken out?"

"Then we call our bet off and you win. you can leave me"

"Hummm... Okay" she smiled "But I pick what you get"

"Deal" I sighed

she smirked and pulled me to heavily kiss her, I happily kissed her back tightening my grip on her, I could hear the guys wolf whistling at us till she pulled away "Get cosy Benny" she smirked running to the table getting a bit of paper,

I breathed and laid on the cushions trying to get comfy staring at my celling while my head screamed at me

'Helloo! Earth to benny's rational mind what the fuck are we doing! why do we agree to this! She's gonna tattoo a dick on me isn't she?'

"You done this before?" The guy asked me

"Nope"

"I aint gonna lie to ya man, It's gonna fuckin' hurt"

"Yeah... I know"

"Ankle, under 15." y/n smiled handing this guy a bit of paper but I didn't see what it was on it "Get him on the bone"

"You're intentionally making this hurt aren't you?"

"Ohh relax benny, My first tattoo was my ankle"

"It was? so... it's an easy first place then?" I asked as she came over getting comfy with me

"Ohhh noo. I screamed" she smirked rubbing on my shoulders

"Thanks."

"don't move. Or It'll take longer. and hurt more" he told me

"Great" I sighed

"Ohh relax I'm not that evil to you benny"

".... we got married out of spite of course your fucking evil to me" I said starting to panic as he moved my jeans up 'ohh fuck oh fuck this is getting real, this is getting real, it's not to late I can get out of this'

"Yeah," she laughs giving me a cuddle "I hate you"

"I hate you too" I told her and as I did I felt the scratchy pain across my ankle "ahhh fuck!"

I blocked it out or at least tried to, Mostly just laid there with my hands over my eyes narwing on the inside of my mouth as y/n cuddled me and sometimes gave me kisses often going here and there to do other things as people began to leave to head home every so often i felt him drag something across my skin wiping away

"what uhhh what are you wiping?" I asked trying to focus on something other then the pain

"Ink." He says "and blood"

"I shouldn't have asked" I sighed

"Almost done" He says

"Is it normal to feel sick?"

"You're probably just low on sugar" Y/n laughs "You should have eaten something"

"Yeah well... waiting for my wife to make me dinner"

"Make him his dinner y/n" Pete Laughed as he had now came close to watch my pain sitting on the rug even if I did notice him ever so often ogling y/n

"Benny make y/n her dinner" Y/n giggled

"I would by my wife insisted I get my ankle amputated" I sighed

"Ohh grow up your getting a single line tattoo under fifteen centimetres. Not like I made you get my dragon" she laughs

"How long did your dragon take?"

"six hours in two three hour blocks one for line work and one for colouring" The guy smirked as he worked

"How much did that cost?" I asked

"Two crates of beer, fifty bucks and a free fuck with my friend Lina" she laughs

"How much is this?" I asked

"The beer and the cigarette I've had tonight" He shrugs "And your done"

"I'm done?"

"All finished man. you feel alright?" he asks as I sat up

"I feel like I'm going to faint or hurl"

"Go lay down benny," y/n smiled helping me up even if I couldn't put weight on my ankle instantly falling into her arms "whoa. Okay to bed Mr watts right now" she laughs helping me to our room and instantly she tucked me into bed "You get some rest okay sleep tight" she smiles kissing my head before going back to the living room leaving the door open a crack

"Back in a sec y/n I gotta clean up" The tattoo guy said as he headed to the bathroom

"Sure dan" she waves

'ooohh so that's dan"

I tried not to focus on the aching and throbbing pain on my ankle trying to get to sleep

"so? can I have a little sugar now baby?" Pete asked

"Pete knock it off. How many times I'm not into that anymore"

"what? seriously? but your my little biker baby?"

"Yeah well Not anymore"

"What? Because you got married in Vegas your actually going though with this shit? you got drunk and hooked up so what divorce him and lets get back to our sugar?"

"Pete, Look I'm serious. I'm married now"

"You can't really be staying with this little weasel"

"I am." she smiled "I Like being a wife, I like a lot of things about it but... I'm happy,"

I smiled a little and quickly fell asleep.

I groaned as I woke up my ankle still aching but I felt y/n cuddled up with me "Ummm good morning wifey" I smirked holding her close

"Ummmm hello Husband" she smiled cuddling me tighter "How are you feeling?"

"Better, now I have you"

"Yeah me too" she smiled kissing me softly I smirked and pulled her closer kissing her back being careful of her fresh tattoo

"so... we're married. and not looking for a divorce."

"Nope. Unless you like.. I don't know cheat on me or anything like that" she laughs "but other then that. I'm happy"

"Yeah, I'm happy too y/n" I smiled "We're happily married my darling"

"Very happy" she smiled "coffee?"

"Yes please my sweet wife" I told her and she smiled getting up and tugging me along with her, to the kitchen, I smiled wrapping my arms around her nuzzling into her neck as she made coffee, "We're really... not competing anymore? you're happy to stay married to me?"

"Very happy benny," she smiled turning to give me a kiss "For as long as you are"

"I heard... you and pete last night?"

"Did you now?"

"did you and him?"

"Once. Yeah, well you heard last night don't you trust me?"

"I trust you, Even if I hate you"

"Yeah I hate you too" she laughs "Do you like it?" she asks as she turned to face me

"Like what?"

"You're ankle?"

"Ohh. I haven't really seen it yet"

"Come on then" she giggled excitedly dragging me over to the Livingroom sitting her little mirror on the table and angling it down so I could see my ankle I was a little worried what I now Had permanently on me but I was pleasantly surprised,

The careful and beautiful linework of the outline  of the king piece

"oooohh... I like that actually"  I smirked rather impressed with it even if it was rather red,

"See. trust me" she giggled

"It's beautiful darling, I really like it"

"Good, I thought you would" she smiled moving a little closer standing beside me and I could see in the mirror as she got closer she had a fresh tattoo on her ankle too a tattoo in the same style in the same place on her ankle but of a queen piece so as we stood together they matched

"when-"

"after you went to sleep, before Dan left"

"I love it even more now, it's amazing my darling"

"Ummm" she smiled hugging me tightly nuzzling her head into my chest "I love you"

I was in shock, my heart beating quickly, I relaxed a little and hugged her tightly pulling her as close as I could "I love you too"

I smirked as we arrived at lukes my arm around y/n my hand on her butt though her coat

"Hey! you guys are togethere and aren't murdering each other? this is a rareity" Luke laughed letting us in leading us into the poker room where everyone else was already waiting

"Hi everyone" she smiled

"Hey" I waved as we got to the last two seats next to each other, I slipped my jacket and hat off  

"Drinks?" Luke asked

"Just a cola please Luke" she smiled

"Me too" I told him

"This is... weird" Luke said getting them from his little fridge "But come on you two know the rules"

"Course. You look beautiful y/n"

"Awww thank you benny, you look very handsome too" she smiled I happily kissed her giving her lips a sweet intense kiss

"What- What the hell is going on?" Luke asked as everyone was confused

"You go on wifey" I winked slapping her butt as I sat down she smiled widely and showed off her nice diamond ring,  and wedding ring. everyone looked impressed and shocked so I smirked and showed off my own with my signet ring

"You- You two are... fucking married now?" He asked

"Yep happily married" she smiled slipping her coat off putting it on the chair

"Yes! I knew it!" Mark laughed from across the table "the second y/n wasn't drinking I knew it"

"Yeah, Four months now right?"

"Four and a half" she smiled as she sat down and took my hand "I love you" she smiled nuzzling into my shoulder as Luke dealt the cards

"I love you too" I smirked giving her a kiss

"This is the most insane thing I've seen in my life. But I knew you two loved each other really" Luke laughed.

[gay-salt-amber]

The phone call

Here's some notices or warnings before reading!

A trans man giving birth, Seungchuchu, Trans Phichit, Haikyuu x Yuri on Ice.

Seung-gil pov-

I entered the rink, sat down my bag and took a sip out of my thermos of coffee, "Hi coach." I greeted, tired and already done with my coach for the day.

"Greetings Seung-gil, sit down we need to figure out your skating routine for the next competition."

I nodded at my coach and sat down. I sat there, listening to my coach's instructions.. Well I wasn't really listening, I couldn't bring myself to focus... Phichit, my husband, had been really sick recently. I knew that he knew why but he wouldn't tell me, while some secrets were fine, it just felt to serious to be kept a secret. But if he wants to keep that stuff to himself, then I have no wish to pry into his business.

My coach, Min-so Park, must have noticed. She gave me a light flick on the ear and raised her voice by a inch, "Pay attention." She said.

I had to restraint myself from saying something else other then sorry, "Sorry, stuff has been happening at home."

"Don't carry that onto the ice, Seung-gil."

"..Sorry.." I said, trying to sound like I was actually sorry which I wasn't.

"Alright, now how about we do this song?" She said pointing to a list of songs she had written down.

"Sure, when are we going to figure out outfits though?"

"Probably tomorrow, we need to make sure this song is good for you before we figure out costumes."

She put the list down and walked over to the music-playing setup, "Lets start practice, Seung-gil."

I nodded as I re-tied my skates and went onto the ice, ready for a tiring day of practice. I just hope Phichit is doing alright.. I'm worried, so fucking worried.

Phichit pov-

I flushed the toilet, washed the disgusting taste out of my mouth out and exited the bathroom, I took my time walking down the stairs, holding onto the handle for dear life even though my feet were fine. I still don't wanna fall. Eventually after what felt like a lifetime, I made it to the couch where I flopped and grabbed my phone. As I massaged my headache, I hit Yuuri's contact, his nickname in my phone being 'bestie' I let out a silent swear as a sting of pain came but I hit the 'call' button and sucked up the pain.

Thankfully he picked up, even though he is at practice

"Hey Phichit, did you need something?"

I let out a small fake sob, "I feel like shit.."

"Oh, is Seung-gil with you?"

"No, he wanted to stay home but his coach made him come in.."

I could tell the Japanese skater was rolling his eyes, "Have I told you how much I hate his coach?"

"Yep."

After snickering I went back to the original topic, "But I wanted to ask you what you think I've come down with. Its been a week! I have never been sick for more then 2 days and I am scared!"

Yuuri clicked his tongue, "Ok.. Tell me more, I think I have an idea.."

"Well, I have been puking a lot.."

"That happens when you're sick typically.." Now that I think about it, yeah I do puke a bunch when I rarely get sick.

"Yeah.. And you know how I hate pickles?"

"Yes?"

"I now wanna dip those in chocolate and have it for breakfast."

"Any body pain?"

"Well my stomach and hurt like a bitch and my back wants to break."

"...." Yuuri went silent.

"Uh, Yuuri? Bestie? What's wrong?"

"Don't think I'm weird for saying this alright?"

"We've been friends for like 19 years, nothing you say will make me weirded out."

"You never got a bottom surgery when you transitioned right?"

"No, I still wanted kids so I never got much done, you know, minus getting my breasts removed."

"So, I think you should go get a pregnancy test.."

My eyes went wide, "Wha?! Why?!"

"I just think that you have a lot of the symptoms that pregnant people have. I may be wrong but its better now then later, right?"

I went quiet before speaking again, "...What will Seung-gil think?"

Yuuri went out a little chuckle, "Well, if he's as good a husband as you say, he'll stay there and help you."

I chuckled along, "Yeah.. I'll talk to you later."

When I hit the end call button, I threw my phone to the other side of a coach. Upon hearing that, Seung-gil's Siberian Husky came running over and hopped on the couch to try and make me feel better by rubbing his head against my hand.

I smiled bright "Hi buddy.."

"You may be getting a human friend in a few months if Yuuri was right.." I chuckled.

This made the dogs head perk up, his tail started wagging and he went out a bork of excitement.

"I know! so exciting!" I gave him head scratches before walking to the door and grabbing my keys

I turned back to Snow, "Dads gonna go out for a bit, don't cause too much havoc while I'm gone, ok?"

After hearing another bark from the grey-white dog, I left the large apartment and started to walk down the hallway. Even when I was in the lobby and out the front door to my car, I couldn't stop opening and closing my husbands contact.. 'Save it until you actually know..' After taking a breath and by that I mean about 10 breathes, I put the keys in and drove to the store to get the test.

When I pulled into the parking lot, I unbuckled slowly and got my hat and my mask. I did everything slowly, I was just nervous.. I then thought of how lucky I would be to have a kid.. All the happy moments, seeing Seung-gil falling asleep with a baby atop his chest, and that babies adorable face.. With those ideas in my head I opened my car door and practically ran into the store.

Once I entered, I walked to the pharmacy section and after scanning the shelf like 4 times, my eyes finally landed on the pregnancy test, "Damn I must have been staring at it for like 2 minutes." I joked, I grabbed it and walked to the counter to pay, I walked back out to my car and went about 9 miles over the speed limit to get home.

Seung gil pov-

It was coming to be the middle of practice, which was when I was allowed a really quick water break before starting practice again.

"Ok Seung-gil! You can have a water break!" Coach shouted

I nodded and walked over to the bench, right when I was about to grab my water, I heard my phone ringing. When I checked the name.. It was my husband, Phichit.

"I told you to not have your phone out during practice!"

"My husbands really sick so I couldn't really NOT have it on or out." I retorted

"Just answer it."

I rolled my eyes and answered, "Hello?"

Phichit's voice on the other line was nervous, "Uh.. Hey Seung-gil.. Can you come home? Like right now?"

"Why? Are you ok?"

"We just need to talk."

"Now?" I repeated

"Yeah, sorry for interrupting your practice dear.." He sighed

"No, no! It's ok, I don't wanna be here anyway."

Phichit laughed which made my heart glow, "Alright, see you soon."

"See you soon." And with that I ended the call, grabbed my stuff and walked to the exit.

"SEUNG GIL LEE WHERE THE WORLD ARE YOU GOING?! YOU STILL HAVE PRACTICE!" My coach yelled from the rink,

My voice went back to being cold instead of sweet like when I was on the phone, "Home."

The brown haired woman started running in my direction, "Oh hell no!" But by the time she said that the door was open and I was walking to my car and quickly on the road.

--When he got home--

Once I opened the door I hear the muffled tv in the background, I kicked off my shoes at the door gave the dog some love and went to sit on the couch next to my husband.

"Welcome home.." The Thai's boy was quiet.

"So what did you wanna talk about dear? You never call me back from practice...."

"Uh.. You know how I said I was trans? How I was born a girl not a male?"

"Yes?"

Phichit stood up and walked in the direction of the bedroom, "Its best I show you, wait here.."

I nodded and waited. he came back a minute later, holding a something that looked familiar to me, but I couldn't put my finger on it. Once he sat down he handed the long stick to me,

"Guess what.. You're a dad.." His voice was nervous

I looked at the pregnancy test.

Then back to him.

"I get it if you are mad if I didn't tell you sooner that this could happen but, I have always wanted to start a family with you so, please, help me parent our child."

I couldn't even speak, I just wrapped my arms tightly around Phichit, "There is no universe where I would pass up to take care of a child with you." I breathed before continuing to speak, "I love you so much. We are going to have a happy family here, ok? I will do whatever I can to support our family."

When I finally looked up at my husband, tears were streaming down his face, I panicked, "Why are you crying?! Did I say something?!"

He laughed, wiping his small tears away, "No, you're just fine. I'm just.. happy."

I gave him a kiss on the forehead, "Are you hungry? I was thinking of ordering pizza."

"Can you get me pineapple pizza..?"

I let out a snort, "Sure."

--After ordering pizza--

Once we sat down, we happily ate, I smiled as I watched Phichit devour his pizza and his cute little face have pizza sauce get dotted on the cheeks and his chin. After he chewed he started to speak

"Hey I have a question about your coach."

I put down my pizza and looked at the cute boy, "What of her?"

"Well, I think you either need to talk to her, or get a new coach."

"I mean I would love to, but why?" I asked

"She never lets you have any holidays off or anything, no special days, no calling in before hand, no calling in sick, nothing! The only way you get out of practice is just walking out. I feel like when the kid is born, that wont be an option anymore."

I nodded my head, taking a bite from my pizza, "Yeah, you're right. I wanted to find a new coach anyway, I just needed a reason."

Phichit chuckled before gasping, "Hold on! I need to go call some people!"

I rubbed my forehead, giving a small smile, "Who are you calling?"

"Y'know, Guang-Hong, Leo and Yuuri! Imma tell them they're uncles now!"

"Alright! Don't take too long!"

A few minutes later I could hear excited gasps and congratulations coming from the kitchen

---A few months later--

Phichit pov-

I was on the phone panicking, Seung-gil couldn't be here, his coach wouldn't let him leave no matter how hard he tried so I was on the phone with Yuuri.

"Stay calm till I get there! I'll get you to the hospital Phichit."

"It fucking hurts!"

"I know just hold on!"

A few minutes later of trying to talk to keep the pain away, the door swung open with Yuuri behind it, he came over, helped me up and we got into the car.

"You're going to be a dad.. Mom? What do you wanna be called anyway?" Yuuri asked

"Whatever the child prefers."

"Do you know the gender yet?"

"No we decided to wait till he's born, which I guess is soon!" I was excited but also nervous.

"..Seung-gil will find a way to get to the hospital to see you, even if he has to jump out a window or something."

I snorted, "Victor did that didn't he?"

"I mean, yeah~"

We finally made it to the hospital and after circling the parking spot a few times, we got out and walked through the entrance.

"When I come out my life's gonna be so different.."

"Mhm! But that's a good thing!" Yuuri reminded me

"Yeah."

--About 15 minutes later--

Seung gil pov-

Once I finally got away from my coach by jumping out the window of the boys locker room and was able to maneuver my ass through the rush hour traffic, I arrived at the hospital. When I entered I instantly spotted Yuuri Katsuki, my husbands best friend and ran over to him.

"How is he?!"

"Thank god you're here."

I sat down and panted, "Yeah, my coach forced me to stay at practice, I had to crawl out through a window."

"Knew it."

"Anyway, is Phichit doing ok?"

Yuuri nodded, "Yes, they have him back there now."

"Can I not go in?"

"Ok."

I started tapping my foot from nervousness I didn't notice Yuuri get up but when I did he was holding coffee in his hand, "Here. They had a coffee cart over there, I figured you would want something to drink."

I took it from his hand, "Thanks."

"So what are you hoping for?"

"Heh, Phichit was hoping for a boy and I would be dead if I said a girl." I laughed

"Do you have a name in mind?"

"Not really, we know we want to change his last name so he can live a normal life though."

"Any ideas for that?"

"We'll figure it out. Phichit is a spur of the moment person, y'know?"

"Oh I know that too well." Yuuri took a sip of his drink before speaking again

"So, you remember when I was watching your dog at my house?"

"Yes?"

"Our dogs cuddled."

My mouth went wide, "Do you have photos?!"

"Yep!"

about 4 hours later-

"Family and friends of Phichit Lee may come in now." The doctor called

I looked at Yuuri, "You go by yourself first Seung-Gil he wants to see you more then me."

I got up and walked to the room and sat on a chair next to the hospital bed,

"Say hello to your son!" Phichit said, a smile from ear to ear on his face.

"He's adorable." I said, reaching out my pointer finger, which the little boy grabbed and held onto with his tiny hands.

"Mhm."

The child blinked a bit, "He has your eyes." I pointed out

"Just as cute too." Phichit added

"Mhm."

"So, what are we thinking for names?"

"Uhh.. I was actually thinking about it in the car."

"Oh? What did you come up with?

"I was thinking of naming him Sakusa Kiyoomi."

"That sounds good."

"Do you want to hold him?"

"Sure."

I reached my hands out and Phichit handed me my son, "I'm really a father.."

"Mhm. I love you so much."

"I love you too dear," He reached out and booped Sakusa nose

"And I love you too, Sakusa."

-16 years later-

Sakusa pov-

I was texting Atsumu, my boyfriend about practice and such.

----

'Tsumu: Hey sweet, adorable love of my life ♥♥! I have a question

Omi: Please use normal pet-names

'Tsumu: Nah

Omi: 😶😑Yes, dear?

'Tsumu: When am I gonna meet your parents? 🤔

Omi: You can come over after practice, if you want.

'Tsumu: Woah! 😲 Really?!

Omi: Sure, I don't care.

'Tsumu: Wait, aren't you at practice too?

Omi: Yeah we're taking a water break

'Tsumu: Well, I'll leave you alone! Love you! See you later tonight Omi-Omi! 😍😘💗💓

Omi: See you then, 'Tsumu <3

----

When I turned off my phone I didn't realize my cousin, Kimori, was standing right over me reading my texts.

"So, hows the married life?

"CHRIST!" I yelped

I regained my composure as the rest of the team looked over, "Great, how are you and that snake boy?" I was referring to Suguru Daishou, who was the captain of the Nohebi Academy volleyball team.

Kimori let out a gasp of betrayal, "Rude!"

"Right.."

The coach called us back onto the court, I stood up and ran back to the court with my team.

--After practice--

I sat there at the train stations coffee shop and sipped on a thing of tea while working on my laptop. I wanted to finish up school work before 'Tsumu got here, after all. While I was typing away on a writing assignment, my phone buzzed, it was one of my dads, Phichit Lee. I finished typing the paragraph, I placed a period, picked up my phone and went to answer the message.

---

Pops: Hey Kiddo👋, me and your dad will be late coming home from practice. Stop by the rink ⛸⛸ if you need anything! ♥♥

Kiyoomi: Will do. Also I will be having my boyfriend over.

Pops: Oh! 😲 Me and your dad can stay out later if you need us to😁

Kiyoomi: No, he wanted to meet you and dad.

Pops: We'll try to get home early in that case!

Kiyoomi: Alright good luck with that pair skate practice

Pops: We're gonna need it 😗

--

After about 15 minutes I looked out of the store and saw that Tsumu's train was pulling in, I got in and waited closer to the train for him. Once he got out I called out for him.

"'Tsumu!" I called

When I did that he ran full speed at me and wrapped his hands around my neck, with my hands wrapping around his waist.

He started placing kisses on my cheeks, "Its been so long!"

I laughed, "Its been a week."

"Same difference!"

I gave a final smile before I grabbed the fake blondes hand and led him to my car.

"So, I'm meeting your parents today?"

I nodded, "They may be late home, but yes."

We got into the car and kept talking about what was going to happen tonight,

"I'm so nervous, y'know?"

"Heh, you don't need to be, don't worry."

I then remembered something, "Also my uncle is dropping by so you'll get to meet them."

"Oo! Cool!"

I plugged my aux cord and handed the phone to 'Tsumu, "Its your turn for music this weekend dear, please don't play The Bee Movie sound track the whole way home."

"Awh! You're lucky I love you Omi!"

He put on Shinedowns new album Amaryllis, so I was happy.

"Nice song choice."

Tsumu rested my hand on top of mine which was already resting on his thigh.

"Do you want me to stop and get coffee or something? Or do you wanna head straight to my place?"

"Meh I had coffee earlier, we can head to your place."

"Oh you haven't been to my place before have you? It's always me visiting you."

"Yeah! That just makes me more excited!"

I smiled.

"Wait.. I NEED TO ASK FOR YOUR BABY PHOTOS!"

"NO!"

We finally pulled into the garage of the apartment complex and exited the car. When we entered the lobby Atsumu spoke up, "This is a really nice looking place."

"Yeah my folks make good money so we have a good sized apartment." I explained as we walked to the elevator

I hit the '8' button and waited till the doors re-opened, we exited as an elderly couple entered and walked to the apartment as the numbers went up across the doors, 801, 802, 803, 804... Finally we reached the apartment, with the silver plaque reading 810. I twisted the key and was instantly greeted by Snow and Makkachin. Makkachin was staying here just because Victor and Yuuri were in Russia and Makkachin was getting too old to travel, y'know, being 15 and all.

Atsumu instantly got down on his knees to give Snow head scratches, "Oh my god! You have dogs! Why didn't you tell me?!"

"Snow is my parents and Makkachin," I said pointing to the dogs as I mentioned them, "Is just staying here till my uncle comes to get them today."

"They're so pretty!"

"Mhm."

Me and Atsumu took off our shoes, I went to the kitchen, filled up the dogs bowls, washed my hands and then crashed on the couch.

Once Atsumu noticed my presence he laid his head on my lap "Your place is nice, Omi-Omi."

"Thanks."

"..Can I change positions so we can both be comfy?" I asked

Atsumu nodded and sat up so I could lay down, Atsumu then laid onto my chest, listening to my breathing and heart beat.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

-10 minutes later-

After we laid there and watched tv for a bit, I heard a knock on the door, "That must be my uncle." Atsumu shot up, and followed me to the door.

When I opened it, I saw my uncle, Nikiforov-Katsuki Yuuri and his husband Victor standing to his left. Once they took a step in the door Makkachin came bolting towards them

"Makkachin! My baby!" Victor called out as he lifted Makkachin into his arms.

Atsumu stood in surprise for a minute while I talked to them. Does he know that they're famous figure skaters? No, I think his twin brother Osamu and his team captain Kita are into that stuff.

"So, before you go I want you to meet someone," I started, I gestured to my boyfriend as I spoke, "This is my boyfriend, Atsumu Miya."

Yuuri smiled and shook his hand, "Its a pleasure to meet you, Atsumu."

After Victor did the same they turned to leave before Atsumu spoke up, "Wait! Can I get your autographs? My captain and brother are big figure skating fans and they would kill me if I passed this up."

Victor and Yuuri laughed and nodded, "Sure! We'd love to!"

Victor and Yuuri signed the autograph to Osamu and wrote below it, "Your brothers cool!" and the one to Kita with "The best captain ever! Kita!"

"Thank you."

"Of course! Your family now after all!"

After we said our goodbyes, Yuuri and Victor left me and my boyfriend alone again. I looked at Atsumu, grabbed his hand and we walked back over to the couch to watch tv while Snow slept on her bed near us. Atsumu kept insisting that we watch Gilmore Girls until I finally gave in and we ended up binging to season 3.

"I'm telling you! Luke is the best!"

"Aand why do you think that?"

I shrugged, "Meh Lorelai is better."

"No!"

We kept bickering like children for a few minutes before I pulled my lover in for a kiss, that managed to shut him up. But his red face was too cute to not kiss over, and over, and over again. So that's exactly what I did.

"A kiss here." I said giving a kiss on his cheek, "And a kiss for the other side," "A kiss here," "And a kiss here,"

"Omiiiiiiii~"

I laughed, stopping my kissing spree after I kissed every spot on his face, "I love you."

"I love you more, baby dearest."

I smiled, "Just call me baby or dear. Baby dearest sounds weird."

"Awh but its cute!"

Snow barked as they awoke from their nap

"See? Even snow agrees that its cute!"

I looked over at Snow with a deadpan look, "Really? I know you like my boyfriend because he gave you belly rubs, but, really?"

--When Seung-gil and Phichit got home--

I was too focused on the snoring Atsumu on my chest to hear the clicking of the front door, the removal of shoes, or the hanging of keys. It was only when I was a flash off a camera did I know that my parents saw my boyfriend laying on my lap.

My dad started rapidly typing on his phone, "Seung-gil! Get in here! This is adorable!"

The black haired Korean walked into the room, "Phichit, lets let them relax and get dinner started ok?"

"OK!" After that, Seung-gil was walking to the kitchen and Phichit speed walking to keep up.

After a few more minutes Atsumu woke up from his nap with a yawn, "Hey Omi-kun."

"Good morning dear."

I started petting his head when spoke, "Did your parents come home?"

"Mhm."

"WAIT WHAT?!"

"Shh.. I just wanted you to sleep, its fine."

"..OK."

Then I heard a gasp from the kitchen

"SEUNG-GIL! SAKUSAS BOYFRIEND IS AWAKE!"

My dads had came peaking out from the corner 2 seconds later, "Atsumu, this is my dad."

The cheerful boy sat up and shook my dads hand, "Hi, I'm Atsumu Miya."

"Im Phichit Lee."

"Hold on im gonna go get your other dad." My dad said before leaving the room to go grab his husband.

"Wait... YOU HAVE TWO DADS AND YOU DIDNT TELL ME?!"

"You never asked."

"Humph." Atsumu huffed, turning his head.

"Oh come on.. Look at me dear."

"Nu!"

"I'll let you see baby pictures of me later." I offered.

"..."

I sighed and grabbed his hand, "We'll go get fatty tuna tomorrow with Kimori and his boyfriend."

Atsumu head perked up, "Yes! I love you!"

After that, my dad came in the room with my other dad, "My name is Seung-Gil Lee." He greeted before shaking Atsumu's hand.

After that we sat down at the dinner table, with me and Atsumu on one side and my parents on the other.

"So how long have you two been together?" Phichit asked

"Since our first year of Highschool." I answered

My dads smile grew, "Wait! Are we the first ones in the family to know?!"

"Nah, Uncle Leo and Guang-Hong know."

He gasped dramatically and put a hand on his chest, "My own squad betraying me like that, so tragic~"

"Also heres a question." Atsumu started

"Yes?"

"Whos your favorite character in Gilmore Girls?"

"Luke." Seung-Gil said

This caused my dad to look at him with bewilderment, "Am I just getting betrayed tonight?! Lorelai is SO much better!"

"Nope."

After we finished eating we went to the living room and chatted.

"So what happened at practice?"

"Oh I got a story," Seung-gil started, putting his cup down.

"So you know how me and your dad are skating on the same rink as the Russian team till our rink gets redone?"

"Yes?"

"So apparently Georgi is dating that one French skater."

"Which one?"

"Jean.. Douche? Y'know that Akaashi boys dad."

That comment made Atsumu nearly spit out his drink, Phichit's dark eyes went wide, "Are you ok?!"

"Yeah, my best friends just dating Akaashi so it was just surprising that he's part French."

"Wait, I thought Oikawa was your best friend?"

"I have multiple best friends, Omi."

"Anyway, so, I heard that Kimori got a boyfriend~"

"Phichit, dear, love of my life, please don't tell me your using your sisters kids life as blackmail."

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Yeah he does." I answered

"Do you have photos?!"

"Dad, I wouldn't be your child if I didn't have blackmail."

I quickly pulled up a photo and showed it to my dads,

(Here's the photo, credit to the artist)

And with that my dad started gushing over the photo, "Awh! Thats so cute!"

"Speaking of cute, do you have Sakusa's baby photos?"

"Oh you bet I do!"

For the next half an hour they looked at baby photos.

Once Atsumu got ready to leave, he asked for a final thing, "Can I get your autographs? My captain and twin brother love figure skating and you two are some of their favorites."

They nodded and signed the papers, and with that, I gave Atsumu a kiss on the cheek and he left.

.

.

.

.

"Sooo whens the wedding?"

[gray-is-neutral]

Supernatural

a fan fiction pt.4

Cas’ POV

Feelings are odd. It’s funny how a few little chemicals can effect your whole way of thinking. There is still so much I don’t understand about humans, but I’m pretty sure they don’t understand it themselves. Humans can’t choose what they feel, and even though they know this, they get mad at the other fir feeling the way they do? Why can’t these things be rational?

But there is no rationality for how I feel for Dean Winchester. It’s self destructive, addictive, and insane. It caused me so much grief, but I don’t want not to feel this way for him.

We all have our additions. Alcohol, drugs, sex, demon blood, but my poison gives the best high. It’s soul crushing and I love it. Being in love with Dean Winchester is literal hell, but it’s paradise too. How does one explain that? Most days, I would gladly punch him right in the nose, but that thought makes me sad.

Looking at him now, the Empty didn’t matter. It was horrible. I was in pain, and I just wanted to stop existing. He looked at me, and like every time, my heart melted.

“What do you want to talk about?” I asked. He wants to talk about the confession. I was so happy I told him, but that was when I was just going to die right after! I didn’t need to deal with the possibility of rejection. Why does this feel so bad? What the...fuck? Yes fuck! What the fuck is this? Why? Why are emotions so hard?

Now I’m worried what Dean feels for me. I mean, he went to the Empty to save me, and then, “Then I’ll stay with you.” Did he mean it? Was he just trying to motivate me? Would he have stayed in the Empty with me? Forever?

He didn’t even tell Sam, however. I was the one to tell him, and I’m regretting that I did.

“You’re in love with Dean?” he asked surprised. “I admitted that I did. I thought he would have told you?” I said. “Dude. It’s Dean. He would rather get on a plane and sky dive into a volcano than talk about feelings. No chic flic moments, remember?” Sam had said and smiled. “Yeah, I remember,” I told him.

“If you ever think about sacrificing your self for me or anyone else, I will drag your ass back from the dead to kill you myself,” Dean said. I looked at him. He looked relatively normal, but his eyes told a whole other story. Deans eyes always have what he calls “Chick flic” moments. He won’t say a word, but his eyes would scream what he’s feeling.

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” I said, feeling myself relax. Sam was right. “Dean won’t be able to just come out and talk about his feelings. He just...can’t,” he had said. Dean’s experience in love has been Hell. The lack of live from his parents. Loosing Lisa and Ben, and being forced to be responsible for his younger brother like a parent would, Dean’s....love map? Yes, that is what it’s called. His love map isn’t right. He’s still learning, and how can someone love another person, if they don’t love themselves first?

“We’re back with pie!” Jack yelled as they entered the bunker. It was hard to believe that he was God now. I looked at the child I helped raise. Dean regrets everything he’s done and said about him. He loves Jack, and I know he wishes he could take it all back. Maybe we can all start to actually heal now? No more big evils. Just family, and time.

“Hell yeah!” Dean said. “Uno?” Sam said, walking in. “Really?” “Well you two were taking forever,” said Dean. “What were we supposed to do? Braid each other’s hair?” Dean said, digging in the grocery bags for the pie. “I also have liquor!” said Jack, a little too proud of himself. “I can drink even though I’m God, right?” he asked.

“I guess we couldn’t stop you?” Sam said. I smiled despite myself. I missed this most of all. I was never letting this go again. It was too perfect. “We got the movies! They’re scary movies!” Jack anounces as he finds himself a place on the couch. “Hurry or I’ll start it without you guys!” he called. “I’m making popcorn! Wait!” Sam called.

Dean was getting a piece of pie, as I was looking for ice. “Hey I know angels don’t normally eat, he said, taking a huge bite of the piece he cut for himself. “But do you want a piece? It’s pretty good,” he said. “No I’m good,” I said. “Good, I didn’t want to share,” he said. He had pie all over his face. I held a straight face, and then imagined us like a scene in a movie. He would ask if I wanted any and I would kiss him, and say something teasing. Like, “You had enough on your mouth.” But then I thought that would be disgusting.

He walked out of the kitchen to claim his seat of the couch as Jack got up to get something. Probably candy.

“Dude he is definitely in love with you,” said Sam, joking. “He just doesn’t offer pie,” he said. “Your not funny. Leave it alone Sam. “I thought you two were together now?” Jack asked.

I honestly would have rather been with the Empty. No amount of torture could compare to this. I am getting better with expressions, I think.

“Stop that,” I said. “Can’t we just enjoy a movie?” I said, as Sam grabbed a six pack of some kind of beer. “Yeah, sure,” said Sam. “Opposite sides of the couch!” Sam yelled as Jack laughed. He wasn’t sure why he was laughing, just that it was supposed to be funny.

I rolled my eyes and walked into the living room. “What are we watching?” I asked. “Some horror movie,” he said. “Y’know, you aren’t obligated to hang out with us. You did just come from the Empty. If this is too much for you-“ “No,” I said. “I was isolated. I don’t wanna be alone,” I said.

He cleared his throat as his brother sat on the other side of him. “I got this!” Jack said, making the movie play with his mind. The kid is literally God, but he is so amazed that he has powers, isn’t that...sweet? Jack may be God, but he’s still Jack.

The movie played and Jack soon realized he didn’t like horror movies. “It’s a ghost! Salt! Why won’t they get salt?” By the third movie, Sam had fallen asleep and Jack was deep into the movie. I didn’t really care for it, but I was happy just to have this. This is normality. Movies, junk food, our family. It was perfect.

I noticed a sudden solid warmth on my shoulder. Dean had fallen asleep. How many sleepless nights had he gone through? He’s never fallen asleep like this. Not this vulnerable.

I smiled. Never mind, now it is perfect. I relaxed into this normalcy. I don’t sleep, but I closed my eyes to let myself take in the peace.

Suddenly, the Tv went to static. “Is your party super boring?” a commercial voice said over the tv. The people that looked like children look-alikes of us agreed, upset. “No problem! Just invite your good friend! Gabriel!”

“Heya boys, miss me?” Gabriel asked.

...

“How are you-?” Dean started. “Me? I’m good,” he said. “Castiel!” he said. “This is an exciting day for us, isn’t it?” “Gabriel, how did you?” I started. “Get pass the warding? Oh I just hitched a ride on that lil’ CD, now let me help you boys out.”

Suddenly, we were in a club setting. The place was empty. “You guys don’t have many friends, no surprise, but uhh how’s about some entertainment?” he said. Exotic dancers, male and female, appeared. “Gabriel!” Sam yelled, having had enough.

“Oh!” he lightly tapped his head as though he had forgotten something. “Sorry Sammy, is this more your speed?” We heard a confused scream. Eileen appeared from no where. “Sam!” she called upon seeing him. “Oh wait! Sorry you two broke up right? How’s this?”

A woman in a doctor’s uniform appeared. “What the fuck?” she said turning around quickly. “Where the hell am I? What just happened?” she said. “Enough!” Jack said. We were suddenly back in the bunker, but so were Eileen and the woman.

“I’m sorry, Mr. Jack God sir,” Gabriel said, innocently. “I just wanted to express my gratitude,” he said. “For?” Sam asked. “Why? You saved me!” Gabriel said, dramatically draping himself across Sam. “If you hadn’t woken me up, I would have never escaped the Empty!”

“What?” Dean said, shaking the glitter from his hair. “My new bestie, Sammy boy here, threw those fireworks right by my head. I woke up and high tailed it out of there,” he said. “Did anyone else escape?” Jack asked. “A few low-level demons. Some low level angels. Crowley, Michael, Luci-“ he said.

I could have cried. Never, we can’t just have one normal night can we? “Don’t worry,” said Jack, taking Gabriel by the shoulder. “You guys help them, I’ll handle things really quickly,” he said and just like that, he was gone.

“Jordan!” Dean exclaimed, going to her side. So this is Dr. Jordan Blake. “What in bloody Hell is going on around here?” she demanded. I looked at Sam who was trying to talk to Eileen, it was in sign language, so I didn’t understand.

“I was in New York, and I’m where now?” Dr. Blake asked, trying to make sense of it all. “Look,” Dean said, gently embracing her. “If you stay for just a minute, we can talk and I will explain everything,” Dean said. She nodded and he cupped her face.

Eileen just wanted to leave. Sam offered to drive her home, but she said no. It was hard to tell how they felt about the other. Sam seemed to want to be with her, but Eileen seemed to want to forget recent events. I didn’t blame her because I understand wanting to forget. She felt used and forced. Now sh egg doesn’t know how she feels or felt. She doesn’t know if it was real. But did forgetting what happened also mean forgetting Sam?

Jack soon returned and took Eileen home. “Call me?” Sam asked. “Maybe,” she said quitely. Then she was gone.

I looked at the doctor, but soon noticed his young shr was. A little younger than Sam. I felt a pang of jealousy. He was so soft with her, but then I thought about the way he looked. It wasn’t how he looked at Lisa. It was how he looked at Jo or Sam.

He saw her like a sister, and for a second I was jealous of her. This is pathetic.

Dean gave her the her the speech. “Angels?” she huffed. “Of course it’s angels,” she laughed. “If I hear another thing about angels tonight,” she said.

“What do you mean?” Sam asked her. She rose her shirt to show the same tattoo that Sam and Dean had. “You’re a hunter,” said Sam.

This was going to be a long night.

[marauders-map-irl]

this is Not An Accident (written very poorly by me)

TRIGGER WARNINGS: R*PE, M*RD*R, SELF-HATE, R*CISM, H*MOPH*BIA

Living here, in this small, ignorant town, going to my small, ignorant high school, looking like I do, loving who I do, sucks. And that’s to say the least. For some background, I live in a small town in the countryside of Tennessee, called Greenton. I go to a high school called Cookie-Cutter, which is pretty ironic because it is much like a high school you would see on tv.

Everyone pretty much hates us here. I can’t say that I blame them, though. I hate me too. My family is the only strange family here; everyone else is pretty normal (extremely so). Everyone mocks us and bullies us. My mum is African American and my father is Irish. They both joke that we’re the 21st century version of the Brady Bunch.

There’s 7 of us, including my parents and I. I’m right in the middle of my brothers and sisters, and perhaps the most normal, but that doesn’t say much. My eldest brother is John (20), and he’s the oldest of us all. He’s mixed like the rest of us, he’s cisgender male and gay. Then comes my eldest sister, Moira (19), who’s non-binary and pansexual. There’s me next (16), and I’m cisgender female, asexual, and aromantic. After me came my trans (female-male) brother (12), Mikey, and he’s heterosexual. Lastly came my sister, Brittany (9), who’s showing signs of being demiromantic.

We’re the only people that aren’t white in the entire town, and we only came here to help dad’s parents in retirement. The town is extremely ignorant, and it doesn’t help that we came from a big city either. In school, I’m an outcast, though I suppose it’s better than being constantly bullied still. They’ve stopped all contact with me completely, deeming my lack of wanting any sexual activities at my age strange. The teachers even think I’m weird too, and as such have either called on me excessively or just stick to grading my perfect papers and not making any conversation with me if unnecessary. I tend to get perfect grades, what with having absolutely no platonic ties to anyone outside family.

That brings me to where we are currently. In math class, staring out of a window I’m somehow always seated by. The teacher, whatever her name is, is droning on and on about a group project worth half of our final grade for the year. Three people just either groaned or were making tiny grunts of displeasure, meaning I was in a group this time. This project must actually be important. I look up about 4 minutes later, when someone sits next to me and taps my shoulder. Looking up, it’s the very person that continues to poke fun at me, Jessica Kaileia. Well, Jessica, 1 of her most loyal cronies, and another nerd. Sam, I think his name is, and I recall he always eats a slice or two of pie everyday at lunch.

“Do you need something?” I ask Jessica coldly, averting my eyes quickly from her makeup-caked face.

“We’re project partners, Mckinlay. Otherwise I wouldn’t risk my wellbeing talking to you, trust me,” she smirks slightly and her cronie sniggers, but I just roll my eyes and Sam snorts.

“So we’re using last names? Didn’t think you liked your last name anymore, what with your father being a serial killer, Kaileia,” Sam says, making me hold in my giggles as Jessica shrieks.

“You forgot the part where her mum left her for a woman,” her cronie says in disgust, clearly trying and failing to conceal her own laughter.

“Mackenzie!!” Jessica says in a shriek that would rival that of Petunia Dursley.

“Watch your volume, Ms. Kaileia,” the teacher says in her monotone voice, barely glancing up from her issue of The Quibbler.

“Yes, Ms. Binns. Sorry, Ms. Binns,” Jessica says, rolling her eyes before returning to glare at Sam and I respectfully.

“What was the assignment?” I ask, wanting to rid myself of these potentially cruel people as quickly as possible.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll get it done by tomorrow and put your names on it. I am second in our year. Of course, I will need your first and last names, well, not yours Kaileia,” Sam states, staring at the packet of instructions and not looking up at us once.

“Yes, well I’m first so I’d actually like to do the work, if you don’t mind. Not that princess Allura and her bestie Romelle here would appreciate getting a fair share of the project,” I say, snatching the packet gently and looking it over.

“Who are they?” the cronie asks, making both Sam and I snort.

“Homewreckers one and two,” Sam says as I divide the instructions in half and give the easy half to Sam.

“Language, Mr. Avery,” the teacher’s monotone voice rings throughout the classroom and Sam apologizes half-heartedly.

“Wait, why do I get the easy part of the assignment?” he asks me offrontedly.

“Because I’m the first in our class,” I answer easily in a ‘duh’ tone, to which he nods with a slight frown.

The assignment was straightforward and easy, although to Jessica and her friend, it would be like rocket science to a 3 year old. I set to work, knowing that if I start now, my half would be done by the end of lunch hour. I didn’t pay much attention to my bullies, though them being in my peripheral didn’t support the cause at all. They were seemingly doing their nails (more like the minion doing Jessica’s nails) and talking about stereotypical popular girl things. The tiny bits that I actually heard made me roll my eyes so hard and so often I was worried they might actually get stuck.

“What’s your name? I need to know for the project,” I ask the she-devil’s minion, but she looks to Jessica for confirmation before speaking.

“Clara Maythers,” she mutters, as though the mere thought of speaking to someone as ‘abnormal’ as me scared her very being.

I nod half-heartedly before adding her name to the list and continuing the project, trying once again to ignore the ignorant bastards behind me. I turn slightly when I see Jessica forcing Clara to hold up a magazine for her to read while she blows her wet nails dry, making sure I couldn’t see them at all. When I was looking over what I had, the intercom came on and the principal spoke. Her voice shook with laughter and I’m sure her face was turned up in a smirk. It was probably another prank. This is Cookie-Cutter, after all. We’re a very stereotypical high school and I’m a very… let’s just say mold-breaking student.

“Could Ms. Alessia Mckinlay come to the front desk to be collected. There has been a family emergency,” she says family as if she doesn’t believe my strange family is one, and I’m sure she doesn’t. There’s incoherent words being said to the principal and she grudgingly continues. “Please,” and after that, the intercom cuts off and all heads turn my way.

I make my way to the front office, as asked, and am hit with sneers, sympathetic looks, and pretty much everything between hate and loathing. I’m not even able to make my way to the front office before my parents steer me away from looking in the lobby. I look at them with a mix of skepticism and worry. Principal Maera did say there was a family emergency, after all.

“What happened?” I ask, trying to look over my parents’ shoulders and failing, due to them forming a wall in front of whatever they were hiding.

“Your sister… There was an accident and…” mum cuts herself off there with a choked sob, making me look to my father for the remaining explanation.

“They…” my father then stops himself, opening and closing his mouth repeatedly, either searching for the right words or not wanting to say them aloud (although in retrospect, it’s probably a mix of both).

At this point, I’m worried for all of my sisters, frustrated with my parents for not telling me what’s wrong, and attempting to stay positive and force all the negative thoughts from my head. I manage to shove through the human wall before me and my body freezes at the sight. Laying in front of my eyes is my little sister, Brittany, battered, bruised, broken, and lifeless. Her pants are down to her ankles, her rainbow underwear just past her knees, and blood is drying and caking around her…

I tear my eyes away, but they somehow end up right back at her. This time, though, I’m studying her face. It’s frozen in pain, but there’s also an air of peacefulness present. There’s bruises forming around her neck and littering her face, but I try not to focus on that. I try to focus on all her happy memories. I try to focus on her laughing as mum caught her cheating in Monopoly. I try to focus on dad hiding a grin as she stole a bit of the cake batter for my birthday last year. I try to focus on Brit. But it’s so hard. I try to focus on her happy times. But I always end up looking into her wide, horrified eyes.

My body’s seemingly on autopilot now, because I somehow make it over to my 9 year old sibling to shut her eyes properly, but I didn’t think about it. I thought about how someone could do this to a child. I thought about who could do this to a child. I thought about why someone would do this to a child.

But soon enough, a camera flashes, and then 2, then 5, and then I’m surrounded not only by my baby sister’s blood, but light from what seems like millions of phones. Soon enough, I feel like I’m under a microscope, and viscous scientists are picking apart my every move. Soon enough, I’m back to the main lobby of Cookie-Cutter High School in Greenton, Tennessee. And soon enough, the laughing, mocking, sneering, jeering students return full force.

I hear my mum crying in the background and muttering something about this being an accident. About it having to be an accident. That just makes me mad. Does she not see the freshman taking pictures of her youngest child’s corpse? Does she not see the sophomores laughing mercilessly at her and my tears alike? Does she not hear the juniors yelling at us that our whole family is a disgrace to human-kind? Does she not hear the seniors telling us that we all deserve the same fate? Does she not see my principal’s smug smirk as she watches the whole event and does absolutely nothing?

“This wasn’t an accident. How can you beat someone up on accident? How can you rape someone on accident? How can you murder an innocent child ON ACCIDENT? I get that you’re in shock or whatever, I really do. BUT HOW THE HELL COULD YOU POSSIBLY THINK THIS WAS AN ACCIDENT? PEOPLE HAVE BULLIED US EVER SINCE WE MOVED HERE! THEY MOCK, TEASE, PUNCH, BUT NOW THEY’VE GONE TOO FAR!” my father is telling me to stop yelling, but I don’t hear him. All I know is that I see red, whether that be from the blood pooling at my feet or rage, I have no clue. “DON’T YOU SEE THEM LAUGHING, RECORDING, YELLING AT US?! DON’T YOU SEE HOW THIS COULD NOT HAVE POSSIBLY BEEN AN ACCIDENT?!” and by now, I’m crying, but she has to know. She has to become aware. She has to stop this. She has to. “Please,” I say to no one in particular, taking my sister’s dead body in my arms and sinking down to sit on the floor.

I can’t do anything but hug my now limp sister and pray that this is just another practical joke. Hope that she’s not really gone. Wish that I could have been a good big sister and protected her.

She had so much life left to live. She was only NINE, for god’s sake! She was going to grow up! She was going to make it past the fourth grade! She was going to do well in school and get into the college she wanted to go to! She was going to be successful in her career and her life! She was going to die when she was old and senile and only after beating a terminal disease like cancer, because that’s the stubborn bastard she is. Was.

This wasn’t an accident.

[silence-burns]

Please Hate Me //part 21

Fandom: Marvel

Summary: Based on "Imagine having a love/hate relationship with Loki." by @thefandomimagine

Loki wouldn't call himself a master of lockpicking, but he certainly possessed his fair share of skills regarding the matter.

Their origins were varied, some including childhood punishments requiring him to be locked in his chambers. Some came from the times his curiosity whispered to him from places people didn't want him to peer into. Both of those gave Loki a rather good hold on what he was able to do in just a few minutes under no supervision.

Most of his skills, unfortunately, required a lock to be picked.

Loki stared at the wall and a panel next to the door. In the hopes of not gaining your attention, he tried to look utterly disinterested in the room you brought him into some time ago, but now he regretted not noticing how you opened the door.

He was sure you fished something out of your pockets. He just didn't think it could be something other than keys.

The panel didn't have any visible buttons, so guessing the code was out of the question. The whole thing seemed blended with the wall, as many things in the damned Tower did.

Loki left the matter of the door for later. The opposite side of the room held a large window, now looking more inviting than ever.

Loki grabbed a handful of chips on his way there. The sandwich you gave him earlier, although (surprisingly) not awful even with the heart on top, did little to completely satisfy his hunger. He sneered at the memory of it.

The window was big enough to allow a proper way out, Loki noticed with professional assessment. He had slipped through enough windows to know his own flexibility and the importance of right angles.

His heart dropped a little when he looked through it, only to find the night view over the shining city be a very high one. Loki wasn't really bothered by heights, but a look down the Tower's side made him hesitate a bit. He remembered he told you he wouldn't sneak out anytime soon, but it was important to know his options in advance, right? Besides, the drop wasn't even that steep, come to think of it…

He turned, a little guilty, when you walked back into the room. Peeling off the dirt and dried fluids of varying sources did wonders to your presentation, only for the effect to be immediately killed off by the disgusting gray outfit, twin to his own.

"What, you thinking about jumping out?" You asked as if reading his mind.

Loki didn't answer as you approached him, throwing your towel on a nearby chair. The chair didn't protest, already carrying a few items you forgot about. You peered outside.

"Damn, it's already snowing. I personally wouldn't recommend sliding out this way anytime soon."

Loki raised his eyebrows. "You make it sound like you've already tried that."

"I made it 4 floors down before I got to the one without any good outside handles. I mean, there were a few, but I kinda slid by them, thanks to the frost."

"Was it worth it?" he asked with actual curiosity.

"It was a bet—of course it was worth it."

"I see."

He watched you settle on the bed, bringing all the food closer, and turning the TV on. A spare blanket was even found for him, and laid to your left. He had to ask, though.

"What do you plan on doing?"

"Watch something mind-numbing, eat, regret I ate so much, and go to sleep."

"Mind if I join?"

"You're my bestie, of course I don't mind."

With a tormented sigh, Loki laid on the mattress, pushing your legs to make more room for himself. "Is that really necessary? It's so crowded here."

"With your bloated ego, I'm surprised the Tower is capable of housing you at all."

He watched you fill your mouth without skipping a beat.

"Can't you use a plate? You're making a mess. I'm not going to sleep on the crumbs," Loki complained, brushing some off the sheets already.

"You can always sleep on the floor. I won't mind, it's all yours."

"I hate you."

"Can't blame you."

He took the muffin you'd been consuming out of your hand and finished it out of sheer malice. Your shocked face made him feel a little better.

"You truly are evil, Loki—to starve the injured and weak…"

"Don't call those few bruises an injury," he scoffed, gesturing to the few cuts on your cheek.

"A few bruises? You see this? My arm is going to kill me tomorrow!" You put your elbow in his face, showing a growing mark that already darkened a large patch of your skin.

It didn't hurt much yet—only when you touched it—but you had enough experience to know it was just the beginning. It was a surprise you could move the arm at all. You remembered falling on it quite a few times, so a broken bone or some joint injury could have been expected at least.

Loki pushed your arm out of his face. "You call that bad? Look at my poor ribs and guess whose knees are imprinted on them!"

He pulled on his shirt to reveal the damage, although he had to admit it wasn't as dramatic as he wished to. His stark white skin contrasted with the grayish bruise, but it looked like the damned bracelet didn't stop his body from healing faster than a regular human's. A few more hours and there would hardly be any trace left of it.

You laughed in his face. "Poor baby. At least I can say I didn't have any choice in that, as I was hauled into the trunk right after you. Do you want me to remind you of the time you basically threw one of those monsters at me? And pushed me off a bridge?"

"How many times do I have to remind your tiny little human brain that it wasn't my fault—"

"You're already looking for excuses—"

"Because normal arguments completely miss you—"

"Shut up, my phone is ringing."

If your hand didn't cut him off with a slap to his mouth, he might have made a remark about your injuries being an obstacle only when it suited you best. Instead, he had to resort to peeling it off his face while you looked for your buzzing phone through the blanket with the other one. Your so very painful injuries didn't seem to be slowing you down.

He stole another cupcake. It wasn't awful.

"Damn, Peter is facetiming us.” You seemed happy.

That alone made him wary. His mood only grew gloomier as the boy's cheery face appeared on the screen in your hand.

You moved closer to Loki to let Peter see the both of you. Loki's ribs were not spared in the process and neither were the sheets as the crumbs left his mouth along with an undignified whimper.

"My favourite teenager, you have no idea how happy I am you're not dead and Aunt May won't be hunting my ass anytime soon." You sent Peter a blinding smile. Loki only shot you a dark glare, trying to free his right arm from under your body.

"Yeah, it didn't go as bad as I thought," Peter laughed as well, although the cut on his lip made it visibly uncomfortable. "I'm just grounded forever, but I'm fine. I've got super-healing, remember?"

You sighed. "Why am I the only normal one here? It's unfair."

"I feel so sorry for you," Loki spit the words with venom coating every one of them.

Peter's face lit up immediately. It got bigger on the screen as the boy peered in closer.

"I'm so happy you're okay too, Mr. Loki! I'm so sorry we kinda dragged you into that, you probably hate our planet already, but it's not that bad all the time, there's plenty of—"

"Peter, how badly are you grounded?" You cut through his rambling, sparing Loki (and yourself) from the never ending stream of words.

"Well, I'm not dead, but if I'm one minute late back home, I might be," he admitted, earning a chuckle from Loki.

"But you're still going to school tomorrow?" you made sure. "I kinda want to grab some shawarma with my bestie, so you could join us during your lunch break?"

"That's so cool! There's a place I can get to in like 3 minutes, so it's a perfect—"

"When exactly did I agree to that?" Loki frowned.

You patted his bracelet. "When you didn't throw our friendship bracelet away."

"I told you I've already tried everything I can to get this thing off me."

"Sounds like a you problem."

Peter nodded silently from the screen, not really minding the fact he'd been forgotten for a moment.

A muscle shifted in Loki's jaw. He muttered with all the politeness he managed through gritted teeth, "And when exactly did your brave and just Avengers agree to that idea?"

"Tomorrow," you answered with all the confidence that had Loki's blood boiling. "Have you no trust?"

"In you? Please, don't get me started…"

You shifted your attention back to Peter, only to find him staring at the both of you with hearts shining in his eyes.

"What?"

"Nothing," Peter said with a smile suggesting the opposite. "See you tomorrow, guys!"

"Huh." You looked at the suddenly dark screen. "He never hangs up so quickly."

Loki muttered something inaudible. He focused on feeding the rage within him with another cupcake. There weren't many left. You assessed the image.

"Are you mad at me?"

"Yes."

"Is watching a compilation of fails the Avengers wish could be erased from the surface of the world going to make you feel better? Thor's included."

Loki hesitated.

"Yes."

The internet was truly a wonderful place, if used right. That truth was only beginning to dawn on Loki, as just a few minutes through the videos worked wonders on his mood.

"How do you even come up with so much footage?" he dared to ask as the replay of Steve slipping on some loose debris during a fight played.

"It's the internet, darling. We've got footage of everything that ever happened on those streets and of a few things that never did."

Taglist: @writerjmlove @drakonwild @eeveesjourney @lokislilcaribbeanprincess @oatballsoffury @inumorph @ejectur @nerdybabywrites @twhgirl @nikkoliferous @unlikelygalaxygiver @multifandomreaderinsertfanfics @dreamingofonceuponatime @iamfelixc @bluebunnlee @effmigentlywithachainsaw @sadwaywardkid​ @ravenclawpossum​ @waitforthehurricane​ @absentmindeduniverse​ @unicorniorosacomefrutillas​  @toboldlyscream​ @waitforthehurricanrose​  @cluelessnitwhit​ @iamverity​ @absentmindeduniverse​ @the-corruptor​ @just-another-romantic​ @breakawayfromeveryday​  @oh-no-a-whovian​

[patheticwithanem]

2020 in Retrospect

Hey friend,

I know it’s late, but I HAVE TO DO THIS. I kind of promised myself I’m writing about the year that was. I’m not exactly sure why; maybe it’s to put things in perspective going in to 2021? And today’s my fourth year anniversary with my employer, so I guess it’s perfect timing? (More on that later)

So I was going through my notes (I have this habit of writing down what happens on a daily basis - be it activities, emotions, drama, name it) and one thing’s for sure. 2020 SUCKED. It did. But I’m committing to this no matter what!

First things first: lots of profanities along the way. Well actually, I was about halfway writing the letter when fucking Tumblr decided to refresh and delete what I’ve been writing for about one fucking hour now. So I have to fucking do it all over again. If this is the Lord telling me to stop being sentimental about 2020, fret not my Lord! I’m one stubborn son of a bitch, so I’m carrying on.

Here’s how the rest of the year unfolded. 2020. Let’s go.

JANUARY. Reunions?

January 1. Had a get-together with a few relatives in Malabon. It was fun! I used to be so allergic to family reunions but I guess age creeping in changes you? You value people even more now? This was also the last time we’re able to spend some time with my uncle from Singapore. He brought his family to spend the holidays here. He’s a sweetheart and a great father who’s missed.

January 9. I attended a college dormmate’s wedding. I remember contemplating whether to go or not only to realize I’m actually lucky to be even invited given the fact that I chose to be distant for them for a long while. I also told myself that not showing up is so far from what I’m trying to be. Although I wasn’t there for the whole thing, I’m glad I did come. I was able to bond with my roommates once again whom I treated like brothers ten years ago and that was nice. A not-so-close dormmate even introduced me to his boyfriend and that’s huuuuge. The bride was beautiful too, and I’m glad she’s in the best place right now after all she’s been through. She’s a strong one, that girl.

January 11. Got invited to a birthday pool party of a colleague at work. I have to say I’m actually quite surprised I was invited to this. She’s always had my back though and always kind of looked after me, so I had to go. It was fun but I didn’t get drunk AT ALL. 

January 12. AND THIS IS WHERE SHIT STARTED HAPPENING. The Taal Volcano erupted. It was awful especially for everyone living near the area because everything was covered with ash. It was also a day before my brother’s birthday and we thought the ashfall would be worse the next day so we decided to celebrate earlier. 

January 19. Went to a fiesta. Did not expect to survive that at all. It was a different kind of neighborhood, but the people were nice. 

January 25. Went to a public market with co-workers to buy clothes, eat chicken wings for dinner and then our regular fix of karaoke. Good times. 

Anything else? I was able to book a birthday trip to Yogyakarta, which I eventually canceled because of youknowwhat. Tragic.

February. Blindside!

February 7. Blindside’s a bitch. Yes, that’s what I had written on my notes. I legitimately felt blindsided. So story: I have a friend who I found out was pregnant (let’s call her Ms. Preggy, sorry) and me and her bestfriend (let’s call him Work Son because he was my work son in a lot of ways) decided to hold an intervention for her. The four of us including a friend I’m going to call The-Now-Bestie (kind of a spoiler) whom I had a misunderstanding and was not in speaking terms with will be coming to Work Son’s place. Essentially, the goal was to make Ms. Preggy open up about her pregnancy and her issues with the douchebag father; make her feel that she has us and she doesn’t need to be alone in this. I think it went well, in that regard. However, the whole thing was awkward in epic proportions. It’s as if me and The-Now-Bestie didn’t want to acknowledge each other’s existence, and when we didn’t have a choice, we were sarcastic to each other. I also really felt like an outsider among the four that time; like I wasn’t supposed to be there and wasn’t really contributing to anything. It was a really lonely feeling. I decided to distance myself to them after that.

February 13. WINNERS AT WAR PREMIERE! Words can’t even express how excited I was to see some of my heroes again on screen! Parvati with that “phoenix rising from the ashes” confessional? Damn, girl! Still a fucking legend! It was also nostalgic Yul working his godfather magic once again. I’ve always seen him as a top-tier winner and someone I looked up to for what he represented to the Asian community and the history of Survivor. It was also nice seeing Kim, Tyson, Tony, Sophie, Natalie and Sandra. But I must say I kind of missed Todd. He was my favorite winner and was a great storyteller, a great strategist and a great character with an amazing comeback story. He would’ve been perfect for a season with this caliber of players. And as much as I hate Jeff Probst for shoving him down our throats, I wanted to see Cochran play with these winners! Caramoan’s my first season (a late superfan, yes) and he’s the very reason I got so hooked with the show. I used to think it’s a game where people like me never win. So to see someone like Cochran who’s awkward in every sense of the word (and owning it) win Survivor, it is very inspiring. I like speaking in metaphors and it’s funny how much metaphorical Survivor can be to how I see life now. I see Cochran and if he can win in Survivor, I feel like I can win in life, as silly as that sounds. Cochran sucked his first season, but he then went on to play this dominant game his second try while still managing to be the adorkable underdog that he is. I love that story. Man, I get so worked up when I talk about Survivor! I wish I had that same passion with anything else.

February 19. Mom slipped and had to be rushed to the nearest ER. Good thing there were no fractures and she was fine. I guess we can thank the fats for that? LOL

February 21 ‘til 23. WEEKEND STAYCATION! I needed this! Drinking at the hotel taproom with a live band? YES! Indian for lunch and surf-and-turf buffet for dinner? YES YES YES! That lamb chops, MY LORD. Thank you.

February 29. Leap Day. I started journaling again. 

March. FUCKING COVID.

March 16. The Start of the Lockdown we all come to love now (punk, sarcasm). 

March 17. Politics is so taboo to discuss especially over dinner. But then BAM. I had a major fight with my dad (and by major, I mean MAJOR in a get-out-of-the-house-in-the-middle-of-the-pandemic kind of major). It was basically about a comment he made that’s so misogynistic (towards the Vice President) that I just knew I can’t just let go. It was sooo bad I got all pissed, and when I’m pissed, I can get scary. Maybe it’s the voice or the eyes or both, but the fight got really heated on the verge of getting physical. Which now that I think about it is stupid just because of fucking different political views. Well, I can never get behind the President and they’re huge fans of him and I’ve come to terms with that but it’s just... bleh. I’m not even gonna try to rationalize it because I can’t. It’s just.. disgusting. Oh fucking well. 

April. Wander-fucking-lust.

April 1. I started a 30-day Financial Detox which basically meant no unnecessary expenses. No online shopping, no paying for leisure. None. It was April Fools, but I was dead-set on saving! (Spoiler alert: I failed.)

April 6. Meltdown. I just really couldn’t hold it in anymore.

April 11. Dad’s birthday. After not talking for over a month (which is no easy feat in a tiny condominium unit), we acknowledged each other’s presence. By April 15, it’s like nothing happened anymore. He even gave me a home haircut (which for a beginner, is pretty good). On other news, I started watching The Politician on Netflix and t’was the day I started obsessing on Ben Platt and his music. 

April 16. A year ago, I was enjoying sidewalk pho and almost making friends at Cu Chi Tunnels and the Saigon Skydeck of the Bitexco Financial Tower in Ho Chi Minh. Damn, covid.

April 18. That crazy border-crossing from Saigon to Phnom Penh a year ago. That was fulfilling. Damn, covid.

April 19. A year ago, I was experiencing sunrise at Angkor Wat. Wander-fucking-lust UGH. 

April 30. That Town Hall shoutout from our company’s President because of reaching my quota from last month. That really felt good. As much as I hate to admit it, I like being validated from time to time. It definitely meant a lot especially coming from her who took a chance on me. I was patting my back.

MAY. Endure. Let Go. 

May 14. KING TONY WON. Very well-deserved win. A disappointment of a season if you ask me, but props to the king for dominating an all-winners season. Respect for that. Also Natalie and Michele played great games as well and they should be very proud of themselves. I feel like a proud father to these winners HAHAHA!

May 16. Was pleasantly surprised with Dead to Me. That car scene between Jen and Judy on that ninth episode from the second season? Damn. That’s one of the few moments I teared up because of a TV show. That was powerful. All that tension building up and then that sudden release? I really felt that.

May 26. Why do I always feel all this fucking rage inside of me? I try to think of any triggers but I can’t seem to find one that’s actually reasonable. It’s like the isolation getting the best of me. I initially thought quarantine’s going to be a cakewalk for an introvert like myself, but it wasn’t the case. I feel like I’m losing my shit because I was stripped off of the usual things I have access to whenever I feel uneasy and anxious and angry like this. Endure, let go, I know. But it’s so much easier said than done, right?

JUNE. Breathe.

June 12. So the plan to sell the condo and find a new place is real. We went to this great place in Valenzuela and it was a great house and all but I felt weird. Maybe I was having trouble letting go? Maybe it’s just me being averse to change yet again?

June 15. Slept 6am for that How To Get Away With Murder series finale. That speech. VIOLA. Chills all over my body. 

June 18. New phone was delivered. That was fast.

June 27. First time visiting the village we moved to. We were checking a different house this time and was already picturing us living there. Still felt weird, but maybe less.

Looking at it now, I realize almost nothing happened in this stretch of months. Pathetic.

JULY. Change (that’s not necessarily good lol)

July 3. The Anti-Terrorism Bill signed. FUCK THE CIRCUS THAT IS THE PHILIPPINE GOVERNMENT. 

July 10. Doomsday. The ABS-CBN renewal disapproved. FUCK THE CIRCUS THAT IS THE PHILIPPINE GOVERNMENT. Also, that first house we checked was bought this day. First heartbreak.

July 22. Decided to donate to one of my elementary teachers to help finance school supplies for his students in the province. That felt good. 

July 24. folklore’s goooood. This is the Taylor Swift sound that I love. (I had to write that down because that was a 2020 highlight to be honest)

AUGUST. Getting older. Again.

August 2. Donated to another cause: to help a really close friend’s mom (who’s a school principal) on financing their students’ lesson modules (they needed more paper so the donation was going to be used to buy more paper). That felt good.

August 3. Started obsessing on Dear Evan Hansen. I mean come on. HOW COME I ONLY KNEW OF THIS NOW?!?! The story, the acting, the soundtrack... it felt like I asked the Lord for a musical for me and he gave this on a silver platter. 

August 9. Lasagna, baked sushi, lechon belly, pansit, cake. Weird combination, I know, but that’s me!

August 11. Discovered the Slowly app. Changed my life since then! I’m not even exaggerating. I guess it has to do with feeling extremely lonely amid the pandemic and getting this platform where you can talk to literally anyone while still keeping your anonymity. And it strips you off of instant gratification you’re so used to because you actually have to wait for your letters to be sent and to arrive. A great exercise for patience if you ask me! And since you have to wait, you make your letters longer and more worthwhile. It’s a platform free of judgment which relies heavily on building actual mental and emotional connections. It’s a gift, truly. NOT EXAGGERATING; YES I’M THAT LONELY.

August 23. The house search continued. This time, the South!

August 24. It was my first time watching a Korean drama and I gotta say I get the hype now. Korea makes great stories and they take their time when telling these stories. The story centering about mental health was definitely what got me to try watching It’s Okay to Not Be Okay, but the show’s so much more than that. That was a great watch.

SEPTEMBER. Finally some light?

September 1. Second year anniversary. I still really miss her.

September 5. My cat’s 5th birthday! Of course we had to celebrate for her with baked macaroni and burnt cheesecake. 

September 11. Lost uncle. He gave a good fight. 

September 19. SENSE8. It’s a show that doesn’t need any explaining. It’s the BEST. I love this cast SO MUCH. I remember thinking if I ever get a tattoo (which is unlikely), I’ll maybe have the title of that Sense8 series finale inked on me. AMOR VINCIT OMNIA. Love conquers all. 

September 27. After a series of unfortunate events, we were led to this house on the same village we keep going back to, and the moment we saw it, we were sold. This is going to be our house. And it happened.

OCTOBER. Surprises?

October 6. Hooked up with someone I probably shouldn’t.

October 12. Booked a trip for next year because I’M HOPEFUL AS FUCK.

October 21. Had the best conversation I had in a long time. 

October 22. Hooked up with someone I probably shouldn’t. 

October 28. Organized a digital event for work. I’m still on the fence whether I’m proud of it or not. It was my first event, and I’ve wanted to do that for a long time. While I enjoyed all the preparation that came with it, from making that tactical marketing plan to coordinating with the organizers and my team, I felt like it was bland. There were lapses here and there and I know that we all tried the best we could, but maybe I just pictured it a little better in my mind? It wasn’t a flawless event and maybe I wanted it to be flawless. But it was fun. I never would’ve imagined me hosting an event, but I did. 

NOVEMBER. Decisions.

November 14. So news came and we’re finally moving. The buyer of the condo got approved and it was only a matter of weeks to settle documents and payment and we’re good to go. I had mixed feelings about it. It took me back to that time we started looking for houses. I wasn’t exactly ready to let go of the place I grew with for the past five years. And I wasn’t also ready to let go of the convenience, and the relationships I only have started building with friends I found along the way. But at that moment I knew I had to be happy because they were happy. My family was happy. I knew I have to be happy.

November 21. Started all the packing. Packing meant decluttering and reminiscing, so letting go of more things which was overwhelming at first, but inevitable. 

November 23. I had something checked in the hospital, and something happened and it wasn’t supposed to go that way but it did and it was so fucking bizarre lol

November 28. HAPPY MOVING DAY. It’s that day of the year. Stress was off the charts because of the time constraint and frankly, the lack of preparedness. Good thing a few people helped us with the rest of the packing. It was an impossible task for me and my sister alone so we were glad we got all the help we needed. I did most of the heavy lifting, so I had bruises all over my body for weeks, but after all was said and done, it felt surreal. Felt like everything coming full circle. That first night in the new home? I’ll never forget that. That was special.

December. The end of an era.

December 2. I went back to the condo to stay for a few more days. Get to feel the place one last time. Also lost a huge deal at work to a competitor. I usually really get depressed with these losses, but for some reason I felt indifferent about it. I guess it was my mind telling me I’ve mentally checked out of work already? That maybe it is really time to move on to something that’ll make me care about what I do again? Make me feel again?

December 4. Met someone (who we can call the Professor) I’ve been talking to for a while now. We’ve had some really great conversations leading to this night; talks at 3AM that’s kind of liberating? I was upfront about the moving and that I only have a few days left in the place which is probably why it happened. Professor was also upfront about leaving the country in a few months for an opportunity to work and do research in Japan for five fucking years. It was awkward at first; but we eventually warmed up to each other and spent the night together. 

December 5. Things escalated pretty quickly. The Professor gave me a shower (that was weird but I was feeling it and I thought it was sweet and sexy?). We cuddled until we slept and there was breakfast prepared when I woke up. I don’t usually get to experience this kind of stuff so I really appreciated that. I was feeling it. I thought I can get used to this! I left the place and was invited back again so I stayed over for another night. We’ve had a few more interesting conversations. I was not expecting some of the things we discussed especially the talk about long-distance relationships. The Professor asked me what I think about it and I was honest; I’m not against it but it’s not something I’ll take a chance on if I wasn’t sure about it. Mantra’s always been connection first before commitment. I’m not the “take a leap of faith” kind-of guy; I needed to be sure. Or at the very least be really mentally and emotionally connected with the person. I thought that made perfect sense. I still do.

December 6. So it was finally goodbye. Me and my sister went to the nearest church to donate a few clothes and shoes and to attend a mass. Bid farewell to the Professor too and promised each other to keep in touch. I also had an awkward encounter with my sister’s “friend” who she sneaked in the condo for God knows what for. Pretty sure they did the nasty.

December 13. We went to our old house (the one I spent my younger years in) to get a few stuff for the new house. I only really wanted to get my old bicycle because I want to be biking regularly for the next year. I want to take that fitness journey seriously! So I got the bike and I got to spend some time with some childhood friends. Good stuff.

December 15. A teammate resigned at work. The funny thing is he did it after getting that 13th month bonus HAHAHA! I can’t blame him though after learning about the salary he gets when he’s performing three functions in the team. That’s insane. But it really made me wonder: am I still in this for the long haul? Or do I move on too?

December 17. So I had my work desk and wardrobe delivered. Felt so nice buying things for my room! 

December 19. We got a new dog! Another French Bulldog. He’s pretty sweet. Someone’s not happy! (MY MOM)

December 22. And then this happened. We were supposed to meet after my dentist appointment (which I only used as an excuse to meet and I thought that was obvious) but the Professor never showed up. I waited for FIVE FREAKIN HOURS. I had like clothes with me because we agreed I sleepover but FUCK. Good thing a friend kept me company, but that was horrible. I thought YOU NEVER DO THAT TO ANYONE. I deserve better.

December 24. We had our house blessed. It was all super spontaneous; we invited a few friends and relatives over and had an intimate gathering. Mom got emotional (AGAIN).

December 27. So Ms. Preggy (from February - oooh that rhymed) had her son baptized. Since she lives a little father from the city, we decided to have a little staycation with some friends there too. The-Now-Bestie and Work Son was there, and we had beer and homecooked food and a slew of great conversations to cap off the year. 

Also December 27. I knew I needed to get something off my chest. And I just had to say it. 

“You’re so unfair. You shouldn’t have done that. Gave me false hopes. Gave me a “3-day trial period” only to disappear without any warning. Made promises you never intended to keep. You could’ve just told me you’re not interested anymore and I would’ve been fine with that but instead, you ghosted me. For the past few weeks since that weekend, it never seemed like you wanted to get to know me better. Or even just keep the communication going. It’s been one-sided and I wonder: has it always been this way? Maybe I’m remembering things differently. I told you I like you and I meant that. I’m still wrapping around my head why and how it happened to be honest. Maybe it’s that weekend? Maybe it’s the conversations leading up to when we first met? I don’t know. But things changed after that and I should ask you for an explanation but it’s really not the point. The point is I thought we can work something out and you hurt me. You may feel like you’re running out of time because of Japan but it’s no excuse to do that to anyone, really. You seem so sure about what you want so I hope you get whatever that is. Merry Christmas. Thanks for the memories.”

That was intense.

December 28. The Professor responded. “I apologize... I am getting attached... I had to “ponder on its implications to me in the long run”... I decided to slow down... It hurts... “That weekend that we met felt like I knew you before”... I am afraid... “You have no idea how hard it is to leave everything behind every 4-5 fucking years not because I wanted it but because I have to”... I still hope to continue whatever we have... “I will always remember you. Please don’t forget about me.”... YADA YADA YADA. 

I know. You know me. I try to empathize as much as possible. But I mean, come on. These are things I already know. It’s not what I needed to hear.

December 31. I needed to say something one last time. There’s already a lot of uncertainties in the world with COVID and life and everything else. I knew I needed answers; I want the binary. I want the black or white for this one. I’m not taking the gray with me next year. So I asked the following questions:

“What do you want from me? Do you want to be friends? Or we stick with occasional catching up on Viber every once in a while (because that’s what it sounds like to me)?”

“What do you want to get from your last two months here? What are you looking for? Just make the most “fun’? Or look for something that will stick?”

“Have you told me anything you really didn’t mean?”

“That one time we talked about long-distance, were you asking me?”

Fast forward to now: I never got the answer I needed. I guess this is one of those rare occasions where no answer is the answer. And after a few weeks of contemplating about it, I am leaving it behind in 2020. 

I’m actually at peace with that.

So there you have it. The suck-fest that is 2020. The first month of the new year wasn’t so bad. I feel this great energy. This year’s going to be different. I did tell you that this letter’s perfect timing. That’s because I’ve resigned and I’m moving on. A friend told me a while ago that he’s proud of me for finally taking action. The 2018 version of myself wouldn’t have done what I did and he was happy for me. I wanted a clean slate and I took it. That I was finally taking ownership of my life. 

I was elated. My friend usually spoils me with compliments and encouragement and my ever reliable negative self-image tend to disagree with him but for the first time in a very long time, it felt right. I’m not usually excited for New Years, but I guess I am?

I say bring it on, 2021.

Until then,

Patheticwithanem

[severeblizzardlady]

Isekai in the Time of QuarantinePart 4

Jin Bubiagawara/Twice

[Part 1, Part 2, Part 3] 

Warnings for: Spoilers, Swearing, Jin 

Dedicated to the people who’re sticking around for this. I do appreciate it, and I hope you’re all taking care of yourselves and having some fun now and then!

It took all of two days for Jin to warm up to you. It wasn’t quite the fastest bond you’d made (that honor went to your bestie from high school--5 minutes in homeroom), but it was quick enough that you were surprised. You’d imagined gaining his trust would take days on end, putting your energy behind every act of kindness you could think of that would keep him from wanting to kill you.

In reality, you let him sleep on the sofa, made him breakfast and dinner (he was on his own for lunch because of work), picked up some clothes for him, and allowed him to do whatever he wanted. As long as it wouldn’t end with you both getting arrested. (He wasn’t thrilled about that, but a line had to be drawn somewhere.) You’d been too tired after work each day to do anymore. You’d wanted to, but....

Just two whole days. And then you woke up on that third day and he was making breakfast for you in his Twice costume. Damn if that bodysuit didn’t accentuate everything. It was by far the best thing you’d ever woken up to. 

Not that you weren’t concerned. You were. And you were still on edge. Because, yeah, you liked Jin. And Jin in his Twice costume had to mean that he trusted you at least a little. Maybe. But he was also a villain you’d (maybe) somehow dragged into your world. You hadn’t been able to find anything online about this sort of thing. 

What were you supposed to do?

---

“I’m back.” You pushed open the door with your back, arms not quite as full of groceries if they might’ve been at any other time. Because you’d been kicked out of the store closest to you, you’d been forced to hunt down the next closest place. Which meant having to memorize the bus schedule. And walking. So much walking. 

Jin was fiddling with something on the couch as you set the groceries on the table. You paused. He had his mask on as well as the coat you’d gotten him. (You’d been worried because you had to order it online, but it fit him surprisingly well--then again, he did know his body measurements.)

“Um, everything okay?” A knot settled in your stomach when he slowly stood up, his back still towards you. Was this it then? It’d been a week and a half now, and neither of you were any closer to a solution. He must’ve reached his limit.

There were a number of ways he could do it, end you. They all flashed through your head. 

You’d already told your parents they didn’t need to come get you. Some quick, bullshit story about your “friend” Jin who you knew from school and had been working on his Master’s degree only for the university and his work study to close, leaving him without money or a place to stay. Wasn’t this awesome? Now you didn’t have to worry about anyone trying to break in.

No one would know, except maybe your damn landlady who kept hitting on Jin whenever he stepped outside. But, God, she’d be next wouldn’t she. He’d--

“J-Jin?”

He turned around. There was a lump under his jacket. His hands were cradled under it, as though he was holding his stomach. “I’m pregnant, and I think the baby’s coming.” He said simply.

You looked at him. Then you looked at his stomach, “What’s in your jacket?” When it squirmed suddenly, you jumped backward, “Jin, what is that?”

“I told you I’m pregnant!” He insisted, and then he opened his jacket further before moving his hands and the thing further up his chest. “And the baby’s coming!” 

What the fuck. Were you dying tonight or what? 

All you could do was watch as Jin moaned--definitely not imagining him moaning like that for any other reason, oh no, definitely not--and lifted his hands until a little pink nose appeared from the opening of his coat. And then a pair of white paws. And then a tiny black head with little pointed ears. Until you were staring at a little tuxedo kitten meowing at you from the confines of Jin’s coat.

“It’s a boy!” Jin cheered, “Let’s name him Dabi, honey.”

A second passed. Then another. Then--

“Hold on,” You started digging through your purse. “Don’t move. I need a picture of this.” You ended up taking several. (Jin was used to it by this point, you didn’t need to really ask anymore.) Once you were satisfied, you asked, “Did you steal that cat?”

“No way!” Jin made an X with both hands, causing the newly named Dabi to squeal and almost fall back into Jin’s coat before Jin caught him again. “I birthed him--you were there!” His left hand, the free one, started waving, and he huffed. “Not now, lefty. Daddy and I are talking about our darling new baby!”

If I’m “Daddy,” does that make him “Mommy”? Oh, awesome, now you were imagining him as a fifties housewife, pearls and all. You snorted, nearly choking on the laugh that threatened to escape. Although--nope, no, your brain needed to be clean for just one minute. “Can I hold our son then?” 

You could feel the way he was beaming at you as he handed little Dabi over (hopefully the real Dabi would never find out). It made you grin as well as you cradled your “son.” Where Jin had found the cat, you weren’t quite sure, but it was friendly enough. As soon as you held him, the little dear climbed onto your shoulder, body vibrating as he purred against your ear. His fur was super soft too, like petting a cloud. 

Oh well, you’d always wanted a pet around. “I can’t believe you got a cat and set everything up,” You smiled at Jin.

He blinked, “Set up?”

Um. “You know, the litter box and the food and--you didn’t get that stuff.”

Jin was silent, right hand still wrapped tightly around his left. You weren’t quite sure what he was thinking, but you had a pretty good idea (Jin always hated letting people down after all). Smiling, you handed Dabi back over. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll run out and grab what we’ll need.” Stepping towards the door, you hesitated. Then you turned back around and gave Jin’s arm a quick squeeze. It was the first time you’d brought yourself to touch him. To actually touch him beyond accidentally brushing against him. “I’ll be right back!”

---

By the second day, Jin had understood why he’d been brought to your world. 

On the surface, you were normal. Just an average, goody-two-shoes, upstanding citizen. You woke up, worked yourself to the bone, and then you’d go for a walk or eat or read. In his world, Jin wouldn’t have spared you another glance.

“...wake up, get in line and be miserable and terrified like the rest of us!”

You weren’t happy. Not just because of the sickness that forced you to stay in your home a majority of the time. You weren’t happy because you were trying to force yourself to be normal. 

He could hear it every time you talked to yourself. The way you sighed after a video meeting with your boss. You were trying to force yourself to fit the box your society had shoved you into. You wanted to be “normal.” You wanted to be accepted on their terms. Who else but Jin could understand that feeling of utter loneliness? 

Really, you were just like him. No. If anything you envied him. He’d seen your social media after all.

There wasn’t much else for him to do while you worked besides smoke, watch TV, and wander around until you went looking for him (because you were concerned about him, weren’t you? Afraid he’d leave you alone again to suffer). You felt bad for him that second day. He could see it in the way you fiddled with your utensils, glancing at him before looking to the door or back into your room. Once you’d cleaned up to begin work, you’d gone to your room, only to come back with your laptop.

“I just put the password in, so you’ll be able to use it. If you want, I mean.” You’d said, moving from one foot to the other. (You were too cute, even cuter than Toga. Maybe? No, yeah, you were.)  

He’d typed in his own name in the search engine, just to see what appeared. And there he was, just like you’d said. (You’d told him about the story, how the story focused on the green-haired kid Toga liked, the one who wanted to be just another shitty hero.)

There were pictures of him. His weight (Rude!), his height, his past, all of it was there for the world to see. He closed out of the page, not wanting to see any more.

It was disgusting, it was crushing, it was interesting, it was exciting. If he could see how the “story” went, he could tell the others. Help them succeed. Hero society would fall, and his friends could have the lives they always wanted. 

And then he’d gone to type something. Couldn’t remember what. It didn’t matter though. Because something came up in the search bar, an account you’d frequented, he’d thought. The link ended with something along the lines of “My boy.”

So he’d clicked on it.

It was your profile. A picture of your window (the one in your room that looked like it had prison bars across it) was the account picture. And then...then there were pictures of him.

Gross, holy shit, what a creep, oh that’s a nice picture! They were from the manga, black and white renderings of himself smattered throughout your profile. He’d been so busy looking at them all--in disgust, fear, intrigue, confusion, wonder--that he hadn’t noticed the captions until he landed on one that sent a thrill through him.

He was on his knees in the picture, arms hanging limply at his sides, covered in blood and sweat. And there were more copies of him--the day he’d used Double on himself to fight the Meta Liberation Army. You’d written one sentence for the caption: “So proud of my boy right now.”

There was a buzzing in his head, his leg had started acting up--We’re not splitting, I’m here, you’re here, we’re all here now!--but he couldn’t stop scrolling back. Couldn’t stop himself from going back and rereading all of your captions.

“Twice is best boy; haters can fight me.”

“Look at him strike that Vogue pose while Skeptic looks like he’s constipated. Rock it, Jin, you funky magical girl!”

“God, he looks so proud of himself making that clone of Rappa. I can just imagine he was doing jazz hands. Someone get my baby a bouquet. He deserves them (and the world)!”

At that moment, he’d heard you talking to your boss in the other room on yet another conference call.Your confession came back to him: “I was going to bed...thinking about how lonely I was.”

You were too used to the toxicity of society that you couldn’t see it was trying to kill you from the inside out. Smothering the person you wanted to be. So he’d take care of it. Your feeling like an outsider, he’d get rid of it. And when you both found a way home finally, he’d bring you along. Away from the judgments of your parents and that creepy lady who kept hitting on him (Ew) and into the Paranormal Liberation Front (Yay!), where you’d finally be able to live as yourself. 

Just like he swore he’d help Hawks, he’d make sure you were free. You’d be right there beside him and the others while the world of heroes got reduced to rubble.