#whole ass piano

[the-entity-down-the-street]

Hi this has nothing to do with anything but I wanted to share some wild shit that went down yesterday.

So my (soon to be) mother-in-law has this 200 year old piano she wants to get rid of. She's tried selling it, no go, so she asked my sister-in-law and her husband to help dismantle it and take it to the curb. This takes a few hours, as you'd expect, but they get it done. Except.

Except. There's this one solid metal piece that they need my fiancé's help for. I asked if I could offer some assistance as well. My babe said they'd call me for help if it was needed, and they didn't. But man, I wish they had.

See, I worked at a FedEx Ground for over a year during the worst part of covid (2020-2021). I was around people whose entire job was lifting shit like this metal piano piece.

The one in the front is what I'm talking about. However heavy you think this is, it's heavier. This shit is solid cast iron.

We called things like this "IC's" or "incompatibles." They couldn't be loaded onto the standard conveyer belt that would carry packages through the warehouse. Super heavy, awkward stuff would be handled by two or three jacked dudes. They'd pull it out of the truck and haul it onto a table, which became a rolling belt, and from there to a series of conveyer belts. What I'm saying is, if they had to lift or push it, there was a lot of heavy machinery involved.

But here? All they had was a CARPET, which they used to drag this beast out of the house, down the porch steps, through the front yard, and all the way around to the back side of the house where trash pick up is.

Why not use the backdoor in the first place, you might ask?

Well, because it's a pretty straight shot through the front of the house to the curb. The backdoor would require going through the kitchen, which is narrow and has a built in island counter. So. No-go.

I'm just. These three average bodied people carried a giant, solid piece of CAST IRON from the living room to the curb.

SUPERHUMAN SHIT RIGHT THERE

Also bonus: destroyed antique piano at night, not sure what mood this is but it sure is one of them

[aromanticannibal]

every time I see someone go "oh gloom spawn isn't that scary compared to guardians, they're good but they're not as good as-" dude have you played the game.

have you felt the raw fear of seeing the world turn red and the music go apeshit while you struggle to fight these bitches for the first time. have you experienced the paranoia of thinking gloom is moving besides you, only to turn around and see nothing. have you beaten the spawn for the first time, only to be fucking betrayed by the game and have to fight phantom ganon. have you fought this ghost of a man and feared for your fucking life as it advanced slowly, so completely sure of his ability he didn't feel the need to attack fast. have you climbed high and watched the hands slowly disappear, only to fear they'd reappear anytime now because you didn't kill them. what the fuck do you MEAN gloom spawn isn't as scary as guardians

[tamagotchikgs]

taking a random tone deaf test i got recommended on youtube and genuinely clapping w joy every time i get something right

[other-peoples-coats]

ok but if you can force crush whoops blackhole.

can you also slightly less force crush yay popcorn. bc like. pressure...cooking? I know there are pressure cooking popcorn machines, so. theoretically yes, right? (I know, it's called bangcorn, but also, that is such a stupid name)

does every battalion with a jedi actually just have one (1) fuck off huge force powered pressure cooker kinda thing, for the moments when they're not just eating sad cold ration bars in a trench or whatever? was there a rushed 'here's how to cook for 20,000 people on a battlefield without wiping out half the planet' lecture series?

tho I guess if jedi can pressure cook with the force probably that's covered in basic jedi lessons, bc like....missions seem to go tits up all the time? and being able to cook by just...squashing some raw ingredients... would make not starving to death on hostile planet #3832-FU easier, presumably.

anyway, I still don't physics, and like, probably it would be a fine line between 'yay stew' and 'hot meat paste', but uhhhhh control exercise says what I guess.

[the-shadowsingers-whore]

it's that time of year again so i'm bringing this masterpiece back.

it's just so cute and cozy and festive. (also the attention to detail with the ornaments is actually insane)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

artist creds: the queen herself @madschofield

[waterlemon-melon]

,,,,,, should i make an ace attorney classical musician au,,,,,,,,

[thewordsayer]

Oh so if I want a string instrument I have to know what TYPE I want? Nobody is willing to put a board for a neck and some strings on any old box for me and call it a day? It has to be some min $200 masterpiece of craftsmanship?

[dragon-chica]

I want to reteach myself to play the piano but the motivation to sit bundled up in a freezing overly crowded storage room with my phone propped up to try and recall how.

[william-austin]

I miss when I used to be able to pull up with the most random ass songs cause like if I could still do that shit I would have maybe half of the musical I'm writing done 😭

[funky-lil-ghost]

ive spent my entire day designing a 3d paper cutout piano for a finals project. like those paper box things with the cutting and the folding? but it’s a 4 inch wide piano.. i am graduating from college in approximately 2 weeks. art major best major i havent written an essay in years

[cincodenada]

This site is amazing. I walked by a bar playing Piano Man an hour ago (in Tel Aviv of all places!) and thought extensively about this very post, which I first saw YEARS ago. Sang the lines to myself and thought about Paul they gay real estate novelist, shipped Billy and John, the whole thing.

Then I go chill in my hotel, scroll on Tumblr, and five posts down I come across none but that selfsame Piano Man gay bar post. Incredible. Well done, everyone.

you know who’s gay? paul the real estate novelist who never had time for a wife and davey who’s still in the navy and probably will be for life

[fyzzyfuzz]

I skipped out on 80% of my school related work today and that somehow resulted in me now getting roped into writing an album…

Wat

[saviourkingslut]

so ive finally started to learn how to properly read music right. doors are opening for me i didn't even know were closed truly a "man goes abt life missing 90% of his brain" experience. ive barely been at it for a week and im nowhere near good yet and already im re-learning pieces id forgotten how to play in probably less than half the time it would've taken me otherwise. also approaching runs more systematically and ive been able to learn something i never got down quite right within two days. you put in the work you get results crazy how that works

[cigarettestreetlight]

Aristocats? Aristocats!

[usuallydyinginside]

TLDR: Francesca Bridgerton is Autistic. Fight me.

Okay so I did not go into Season 3 of Bridgerton expecting to have any feelings about Francesca Bridgerton. We have seen her only in glimpses in the show and I have not read the books, so I knew basically nothing about her before binging the first four episodes.

But guys. GUYS. I will die for this autistic queen.

Okay, so starting with first impressions. We know that on her big day, Francesca went out of her way to avoid her nosy, loud family by having a very early, quiet breakfast by herself and then calming down via playing the piano (clearly a special interest of hers).

In her first balls, we see Francesca light up any time she talks about music (clearly her current or forever special interest) but as soon as men try to take it to a flirting place she IMMEDIATELY shuts down. It's clear that even as she states very matter-of-factly that she plans to marry this season, she also is baffled and uncomfortable any time someone tries to actually, ya know, court her.

At one of her first shindigs, she got attention and then went up to her brother and (while making almost no eye contact) told him (rather than asked him) that she needed a sec.

She then sat by herself in the side of the ballroom.

Later on, she left a ball in search of quiet and solitude to fix her sensory overload, so she went outside this time. (A thing that we know from pervious seasons is a HUGE no-no, particularly unchaperoned. But she was very respectfully near the door so maybe that's fine?) The point is that she cares very much about staying respectable so she can get this marriage thing over with and get people to stop perceiving her, yet she risks some scandal by going outside just so she can be somewhere quiet alone.

Enter: this absolute (also autistic) Prince Charming.

He says hello (so she knows he's not like trying to sneak up on her in the dark like a creep) and then just stands there. 10/10, no notes, best way to flirt I have ever seen in my life.

Seriously just look at this. I'm in love. Never before has there been a greater sign of love at first sight than in this "standing politely five feet apart in total silence in the middle of a ball and enjoying each other's company."

I need to go watch these first four episodes about a hundred more times, but I THINK this might be the first sincere smile we see from Francesca??!? I at least got the impression immediately that this is the first time she's felt genuinely comfortable and happy while not entirely alone this season.

Like, these nerds did not even exchange names. They barely exchanged a word. Yet you can see them falling head over heels in love right there in that moment. I don't even LIKE love at first sight tropes and they have my whole heart. They are the only exception.

Then, of course, you have this second absolutely iconic Scene of Silence where the entire Bridgerton family stares in neurotypical confusion a these two amazing weirdos. The way these two do not know each other but they DO know each other. The way they are both so happy and so comfortable but also still playing the whole society game the way they were told they had to?? I just don't have words right now.

LOOK AT HER SMILE, GUYSSSSSSSS.

Look how happy this tiny, silent moment is making her. How she understands immediately what he's doing and is absolutely delighted to participate too even knowing her entire family is hardcore judging them from not that far away.

And then you get this smug little look from him and it's like you can see his autistic ass thinking, "Yes. I calculated correctly. This was the correct romance option. Gold star to me." (Okay, maybe that's just how my brain works but shhhhh)

Which, of course, brings us to this absolutely hilariously awkward ND attempt at flirting. We start off with some fairly normal "whoops, I'm flustered cause you make me nervous" sort of moments, but notice how little eye contact she makes. How she only looks in his eyes very briefly and it seems like she almost has to remind herself to do so when she's doing the "polite" answers (OR later when she's genuinely interested in a topic).

So as soon as Francesca is like "oh shit, I ruined it. I forgot how to neurotypical. It's over" then she loses patience with the practiced social niceties.

I spent like 30 minutes trying to find a GIF and I should already be asleep so I'm not going to go learn how to make one BUT I needed to look up exactly what happens next cause it's basically the most autistic thing I've ever seen.

WHICH IS that in response to the second awkward silence after Francesca shares all of this, John's response is, "That is helpful. If you'll excuse me."

Then dude bro just WALKS AWAY WITHOUT ANOTHER WORD.

Like it would be awkward anyway but now Francesca thinks she misread a social cue so she's feeling sad, and meanwhile this absolute king is over here on a romantic mission no one asked him to do because he is that set on showing her he's listening and cares.

The man shows up at the ball and as soon as he had a paper we were all screaming "he wrote her a song!!!"

Again, notice the eye contact (or lack thereof). I think with period dramas and women, it's easy to just go "oh she's just shy" or "she's just being demure like she's supposed to" but like NO. This girl does not want to meet anyone's eyes.

Until she does. Because in moments where she's talking about music or enjoying quiet, it's worth it to purposefully meet his eyes and see how he's feeling too. To make sure he can see she's happy.

ANYWAY, it was so much better than him writing a song for her.

SO. MUCH. BETTER.

Because he didn't just give her any ol' music. He sought out the music they'd specifically heard in the street, and he took her exact specifications on what was "wrong" with the music, and he FIXED IT. He then put the whole thing on sheet music and handed her a copy with no further explanation than this.

Our autistic lass was so excited she basically sprinted out of that ball so she could find a piano. (Which, the fact that she does this rather than try to stay and flirt/dance with the man who just gave her this incredible gift ALSO says a lot, just saying. Daphne could never.)

So our girl finds a piano and GUYS. LOOK AT HOW HAPPY SHE IS.

I'm pretty sure this woman would accept a proposal right this second. Maybe make one herself. She is so head over heels in love with this man that it's absurd. We have watched her mask in these first four episodes, but the last two where she's interacting with John are the first times she seems genuinely happy and like the real her is shining through.

Like, does she enjoy her family? Sure. But it's obvious (and she even tells us) that she finds them overwhelming and generally to be A Lot. But these scenes? This gesture?

You can just get how seen she feels. How weird and wild and amazing it is to her that this man can see who she actually is and wants to join her there instead of making her play some part of the perfect Bridgerton who likes to be the center of attention.

(And even here - the EYE CONTACT. She glances at people when she's talking to them, but the way she looks at the sheet music is so much more intense and intimate and personal than anytime she's looking at the average person in the show. She still even in places she's most comfortable, such as sitting at the piano, makes very little eye contact and only at very specific moments.)

Anyway I'm going to sleep now but I'm sure I'll add more thoughts as they come to me. Feel free to add your own case for why Francesca is autistic and/or otherwise neurodivergent. I want to hear allllllll the thoughts.

[afriendofmara]

Something I hate and something I secretly enjoy and something I outwardly enjoy when its a wealthy person doing it: when I do something so simply kind or considerate for someone, something that is so easy for me to do, and they feel so bad about ?? Letting me help in the tiniest way?? That they promise to buy dinner or drinks or something. When its my friends or people I care about its like ????? My guy it comes with the service?????? You don't have to payback, I didn't do anything I didn't want to, I just care abt u. But when its an acquaintance that is wealthy and I know they are overly piled with money, im like :3 yesssss queen of course i will take a free dinner im so poor pls treat me for ???!?!?!? Staying 30mins later than we talked about???!?!!?!?