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stolitz rant/analysis because i keep seeing people mischaracterize them and i’m sick of it and need to let it out :)
every time someone mischaracterizes either blitzø or stolas an angel dies</3
“blitzø is toxic and doesn't care about stolas” “stolas should not have hid himself at ozzie’s he made blitz feel bad” just say you don’t understand nuance and gray characters!
yes, they are flawed and yes, they have both made mistakes, but neither is more at fault than the other in this situation. they are two deeply hurt people, who try to cope and avoid pain in different ways.
blitzø has been left by the people he loves plenty of times (some in which he was at fault) so he doesn’t want to get attached to someone in case that happens again.
mix that with the circumstances of his relationship with stolas, which started as a transactional one with his company’s longevity on the line, and the difference in status between them, of course he will translate stolas’ affections as him just wanting to get fucked by ‘the lower class’ (as blitz puts it in s02ep6).
and in spite of all this, somewhere in his heart blitz already know that the prince is, after all, just a person; and to some extent he is aware that stolas cares for him beyond their deal.
stolas instead has been lonely his entire life, with parents that don’t care about him and a wife he (despite being gay!) was forced to marry- one that has also abused him the entirety of their marriage.
the only solace he gets for the longest time is his daughter, who he adores with entire being, no matter the circumstances in which she was conceived (he was a kid himself when she was born- he was 19! nineteen!! he gave up his life and freedom because his family wanted a heir!)
so when blitzø re-enters his life after 20+ years, he jumps at the chance of a distraction, a little pocket of happiness after a life of neglect. he doesn’t need to be prince stolas of the ars goetia with the imp, he can just be stolas.
a stolas who can be finally true to himself with his sexuality, his personality, his hobbies and so much more because blitz doesn’t care for royalty bs!
admittedly, the way stolas behaved in the beginning wasn’t ideal, and it was partially why blitz feels used, but he understands that later on and tries to do better. he finds another way for blitzø to get to the human world, one that doesn’t put stolas at an unfair advantage.
ozzie’s is just the cherry in top, the climax of an entire season worth of miscommunication and bottled up feelings!! yes, it was fucked up of blitzø to invite stolas just as an excuse to spy on moxxie and millie, and yes, stolas covering himself definitely didn’t leave a good impression (for lack of better wording) on blitzø, but they were both hurt in the end and there’s no definite/sole wrongdoer here.
blitz isn’t a terrible motherfucker that hurts everything that touches and stolas isn’t a ruthless pos that only cares about getting off (as some might consider them to be apparently).
they are two people who desperately need to talk to each other and then work on themselves so that their relationship can flourish- because despite their flaws and their fuck-ups, there is care and there can be so much good, even if it is currently covered by the hurt.
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Also, lets face it. I doubt either of them would be the first criminal he's had a fling with. I am looking specifically at the two who he had help with the case.
It's actually a certified, 99% effective method, don't ask him how he knows
I just love when the most sexless looking, socially weirdo character gets headcanon (to the surprise of everyone) as a slut and having crazy dick game lol
Also, if they had kept the original idea of making Mello and Near his children, I would've liked if they mentioned or implied the mother/s were criminals. Very on brand with the character he's based on (batman)
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Done for Month of Emmet for Day 13: Favorite Ship and Day 16: Memes. I chose Trainwreckshipping. Runners up would be my favorite forbidden not-to-be-named twincest ship and my favorite threesome ship which will get a mention under the cut.
Bonus: My take on the Fort Cuddles comic. It's not a meme, but I'll make it one all by myself. Under a cut for lewd dialogue.
Ingo sees the photo of his brother lying on top of Volo in a weird pose, and he asks him how his date went?
Emmet: I am Emmet. Volo showed his sorry face here again. -And I won against him again. I threw him down and ran tracks straight up his ass. And laid my gigantic railroad tie down that tunnel. He screamed and begged for rescue. I let him know there'd be no stops until the end of the line. Take that, you dirty whore! The train whistle blasted. My bullet train ran through him at 200MPH. He held on for dear life. Volo reached his destination untouched. I left him a trainwreck leaking fluid like a 50-car pileup. He whined that he wouldn't be able to walk away from the scene of the collision. I said, that's right bitch. I gave you what you deserve! -Because I am a Big Subway Boss. I am Emmet.
Volo: Hey, just because I need a cover so people don't guess I'm trying to be God, doesn't mean you need to lay it on that thick.
Ingo: *slides palm slowly up and down Volo's perfectly toned ass and gives it a squeeze* We understand, honey. *turns to Emmet* How about we both run our lines through Volo Central Station next chance we get. We can start on opposite sides and meet in the middle.
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hey king how’s about 7, 14, 21?
7. what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?
don't stone me please vld fandom but. keith. he is sooo overhyped and no one gets him. i don't trust anyone with him any more. it's the Fandom White Boy Phenomenon (have i talked about that here?? idk) anyway keith overrated and also u would hate him if he was a brown girl oops.
14. that one thing you see in fics all the time
can i go for low-hanging fruit and say the random ass spanish phrases tossed in to "remind people" that lance is hispanic? coming from someone who's first/native language is also something other than english, i have never in my life felt the need to suddenly exclaim in russian during an english conversation.
21. part of canon you think is overhyped
THE SUNSET SCENE HOLY SHIT. first of all, it should have been hunk and lance, not keith and lance, in that scene. second of all, Klancers TM use that scene to pretend that their ship is the only one that ever had a meaningful interaction.
ahem?? the hunk and keith scene?? or the allura and keith scenes?? also that one time where lance and allura literally went on a date?? oh but that wasn't *actually* romantic, right. you are all clowns.
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