#while this may be a old picture I did wear my hair in braids today

[vicontheinternet]

[h2bakugou]

Hewoo I saw requests were open and this really cute idea popped in my head can get a lot of fluff with Denki where he surprises his s/o on they're anniversary in front of the whole school

a/n: hiii!! ooo this is so cute omg, we stan denki. please i- i love him so much i cant

summary: with your one-year anniversary coming up soon, kaminari had every intention of making it big, he’d been dating you for a whole year! however, his plan may or may get a little out of his hands when he ends up confessing in front of nearly the whole school.

key: (y/n) - your name / (f/n) - first name / (l/n) - last name / (e/c) - eye color / (h/c) - hair color / (y/q) - your quirk

warnings: swearing, fluff, a camp rock line(i never watched high school musical sorry)

word count: 1.8k

;cut for length;

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Kaminari had met you in secondary school, the year before you both got into U.A. It was coincidentally on a whim when your class collaborated with his on a debate project on some literature project. 

You were paired together, four students from your class on a team with four from his class.

He was goofy, light-hearted, kind, and way too flirty for his age, but you ignored his cheesy pick-up lines until you won the debate.

He’d asked to exchange numbers at the very least since you’d become friends. And that friendship kindled over time, so much so, that you were both over the moon about applying to U.A. together. 

And before you knew it, Kaminari was walking hand-in-hand with you home from the park, or from the grocery store, the two of you often hanging out together over break, excited to be making dinner one night, or happy to help out over at his house.

Needless to say, a few of those long summer nights when you spent time in the pool alone with him, you couldn’t help but let out how you really feel, the two of you eventually establishing something more than a friendship.

You headed to the entrance exams as a couple, and you were both too happy to speak when you saw one another in class the following week.

And now you sat in the Class 1-A dormitory common room, Kaminari’s body between your legs as you put up his hair, a face mask applied to both of your faces as you giggled and reminisced about your time together, your anniversary of being together for one year coming up soon.

“Remember the one time you had to go to the ER because of the shopping cart accident?” Kaminari brought up a rather embarrassing story.

“That poor old lady was petrified, she thought she’d killed me.” You and Kaminari had been goofing off in the grocery store parking lot, returning the cart to its drop-off when an old lady backed out into the cart you were standing on.

It tilted back and you saved yourself from landing face-first on the asphalt at the expense of your right arm. It hurt like a bitch and you had to wear a cast for about a month before your arm healed up enough to do much more.

“You were so worried.” You teased, braiding his yellow hair between your fingers. He lifted his head to look up at you, a pout on his lips. 

“I thought you died too!” Kaminari cooed, pressing a kiss to your knee as he turned back around to let you continue playing with his hair.

“You’re an idiot.” Bakugou mumbled. Kirishima sat beside you, along with Sero, who also had face masks on. They begged to be included in the self-care session and were happily enjoying themselves listening to all your stories.

“So final jam’s coming up.” Kaminari blurted.

“What?!” You laughed, confused at his words.

“T-The final jam?” Kaminari turned back around to stare at you with puppy dog eyes.

“Are you referring to our anniversary as the final jam?” You glared at the yellow-blonde.

“I’m sorry! I had to.” Kaminari stood up and grabbed your hand, yanking you off of the couch.

“That’s right, you’ve been together for a while now huh?” Sero mentioned, glancing over at Bakugou who seemed to be interested in the idea of Kaminari holding a relationship longer than a week.

“One whole year.” Kaminari stared at you with adoration in his eyes, and you were worried if he stared any harder his eyes would pop out. Your face was hot at his words. 

You felt all giddy and warm inside. You really did love Kaminari, and getting to this point felt so amazing, so refreshing. 

“That’s awesome! Congrats!” Kirishima was quick to congratulate you both on the seemingly wild accomplishment.

Later during the night, after washing off the face mask and finishing up your routine, you walked back to your dorm with Kaminari.

“I really couldn’t be more excited for our anniversary.” Kaminari’s hands rested in yours as he pulled you in for a hug.

“I know, I’m excited too. You gonna take me out on a big date?” You tease, hugging him.

“I’m broke!” Kaminari whines, pressing a tender kiss to your cheek.

“I’m kidding. I just wanna spend the day with you, playing video games and-”

“Cuddling.” Kaminari offers, his eyes sparkling.

“Cuddling.” You agree, leaning in, pressing your lips to his. It’s a short kiss, but it’s meaningful, and tender, and passionate. It holds just enough emotion to convey how warm you feel inside. It’s electrifying, pun intended.

“I love you, sweet dreams.” Kaminari whispers as you begin to open your dorm door. You smile and wave.

“I love you too, goodnight.” You reply, closing the door after he leaves.

That night you tuck yourself into bed, happier than usual. You’re almost too excited to even sleep. But eventually, your dreams call you and you’re drifting away before you can even realize it.

The day of your anniversary, you’re a giddy mess. Kaminari and you are practically in each other’s arms the entire morning, hoping that you aren’t being that annoying couple. You’re keeping the PDA down to simple hand-holding even though you’d much rather embrace him and kiss him until you couldn’t breathe.

But you had classes. The mushy-gushy stuff could wait till later. When Aizawa couldn’t yell at you.

During the day, Kaminari and you both ended up surprising one another with little gifts, tiny trinkets just to show that you were thinking of each other. Kaminari of course bought you a bouquet of your favorite flowers, whereas you managed to snag a pretty rose for him and a new game for his console.

He was over the moon about the rose and claimed he was going to cherish it forever. It was so sweet.

That was until lunch rolled around.

“There the love birds are!” Mina cheered as you and Kaminari sat down at the table. Almost the entire class was aware of what was today, and a few peers congratulated you on being together for one year.

“Hush!” Your face burned with embarrassment as you nuzzled into Kaminari’s shoulder, swatting away at your pink-haired friend.

“You guys are so cute!” She teased, taking another bite of her lunch.

Lunch was abruptly interrupted when Kaminari said he had to go somewhere. You were a bit surprised by his exclamation but you said goodbye as he left.

“What’s with that?” You asked, a defeated sigh coming from your lips.

“Don’t know. Maybe he’s got another gift for you.” Mina nudged your side. You shook your head and covered your face.

“Please! I can’t take any more gifts from him, I just wanna spend quality time with him and do stupid lovey-dovey couple’s crap.” You groan.

Kaminari was racing toward the AV room where he had agreed to meet another student for something he had commissioned for you. It was a delicate glass frame with a picture of you and him embossed into it.

Of course by the time he arrived, he was running late. He blamed you for being so captivating, of course though, it wasn’t an issue that he was late, the student was there, happy as could be to have been commissioned for a project.

And the result was beautiful. It was truly wonderful, and Kaminari was almost in tears at how delicate and amazing it looked. Kaminari had already paid the student when he brought up the idea, and now he was finally here to get it.

It was wrapped in a beautiful box, carefully surrounded with bio-degradable filler to prevent it from breaking. 

“Thank you so much for doing this, it’s so important to me.” Kaminari placed the box down on the table in the AV room, unaware that he’d set it down on the button that turned on the intercom for student news, etc.

Kaminari had set it down because he was afraid he’d drop it on a whim somehow.

“They’re just so important to me, I can’t explain it. They’re the one, ya know?” Kaminari’s voice rang throughout the intercom system.

Your ears perked up, your face begging to sear with heat. 

“I think I’ve always loved (Y/n). When we met I could just feel the world stop and all I could see was them. And from there I knew, I wanted to spend every waking moment with them.” Kaminari was completely unaware that his words were now being heard throughout the entire school building.

“Oh my god.” Kirishima looked at you. Everyone that knew you, was staring at you. You couldn’t help but feel touched. You could feel your eyes swelling with tears, happy tears.

“I live to see them smile, and their laugh? It’s music to my ears. I’m so in love with them. I’d spend a million years of my life with them, today marks one.” Kaminari’s words were cut short by a teacher barging through the door. Quickly turning to see the commotion, Kaminari was confused when the teacher started yelling about using the intercom for personal reasons.

That’s when Kaminari’s eyes shot down to where he’d sat the box, and now noticed the blinking red light that confirmed the intercom was actively broadcasting.

Blush spread like fire across his face and ears, as he quickly grabbed the box and stormed back to the cafeteria where you were still eating lunch.

Barging in, you lifted your head, smiling like an idiot as he ran toward you.

“I am so sorry! I didn’t mean to do that I- It was true, all of it, but I didn’t mean to embarrass you or or-”

Your lips on his shut him up as your rested your hands on his shoulders, completely silencing him. His hands held onto the box in front of him, his lips moving together against yours.

A few cheers and ‘woos’ came from fellow students but you couldn’t hear them. You were completely capsulated by Kaminari and the electric love blossoming between the two of you.

Pulling away in a haze, all you could see was him.

“I love you so much.” You smiled.

Later, after a decent scolding from Aizawa and another teacher, you were let go and finally allowed to go to your dorm.

Placing the delicate glass picture up on your shelf you then pulled Kaminari onto your bed, nuzzling into his side.

“This is what I was waiting for.” Kaminari cuddled into you, wrapping around you like a sloth as you laid on his stomach doing the same.

“This is an average Tuesday for us.” You mumbled, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

“Well, I like my average Tuesdays with you, dummy.” Kaminari smiled, clicking on your tv to watch something as you cuddled.

The anniversary was a success. And who cared if nearly the whole school knew about how strongly you felt for one another. You were happy, Kaminari was happy, and you couldn’t wait to spend more time with him.

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masterlist

[migilini]

I Do - Charlie Gillespie

a/n: I watched to many seasons of married at first sight and this came to mind. Just pretend that Charlie in this GIF is wearing a suit. Kinda a part two to Fifth Time Workes A Charm

Requests are open btw! (not just for Charlie)

words: 3k

warnings: none just fluff and a lot of crying

MASTERLIST

---------------------------------------------

You barely slept during the night. You kept waking up what felt like every hour to check if it was time to get up. The bed felt awfully empty and you would give everything right now to be in his arms. Then finally, the clock strikes 9 am and you are up on your feet, the nerves getting the better of you. The hotel room was nice and clean, you didn't like it, it felt too white and too lifeless to you right now.

You looked at yourself in the mirror, glowing but tired eyes staring right back at you. Taking a deep breath you tried to shake the nerves with a silly little body shake, then you smiled at yourself before heading into the bathroom to wash your face.

A knock on the door interrupted you mid-splash and you went to the door with a dripping face. “We’ve arrived!” your best friend Elouise or Eli for short exclaimed and hieved her whole baggage onto your bed. “What do you mean we?” you leaned your head out of the room and into the empty hallway. Just as you were about to close the door, feet pounded on the carpeted floor. “Sorry, sorry! Had to finish the call with hair and makeup.” Tris, your other best friend screamed through the halls, as she frantically came running towards you, phone clutched in one hand while the other held two dresses that flattered behind her.

You looked at her in amusement "Need a glass of water?" You chuckled at her heavy breathing and closed the door behind you.

"Oh yes please"

"Y/N you're so not ready...well lucky for you we are here. So hop hop go shower ma lady." Eli shushed you into the bathroom "and scrub every inch! I'll check if I have to!” You still heard their laughter as you get rid of your clothes and step into the shower. The warm water relaxed your muscles and your nerves immediately.

Several minutes later, now smelling like a goddess and wrapped into a soft white towel, you sat on the bed in your now crowded hotel room. While you were showering your nerves away, your dress, the hairdresser and makeup artist arrived.

“There she is!” greeted the makeup artist “Come sit down, we’ve got everything out and you and I already discussed your look. Are we still okay with it?”

“Yes, Carlos. But make everything as cry proof as possible okay?” you said laughing slightly.

“I also brought you a coffee and a croissant. I know you don’t usually eat something in the mornings but we don’t want you to faint now do we?” Tris held a tablet in front of her with several cups of coffees and something to eat. You took a cup gratefully, shooting her a quick thanks, holding the cup as Carlos started on your face and Melissa, the hairdresser started drying and styling your hair.

“Can I have my phone back?” You said to no one in particular.

“Nope, sorry.”

“Emi! What--It’s my phone!”

“I do know that. And you should know that Tris and I know you very well and you would’ve called or more likely face timed him by now and put a bad omen over the whole day.”

“Yeah. You and Charlie can’t be away from each other for long.” Tris acknowledged and sided with Emi.

“You’re just jealous that I’m in love.” You shot back with a smile and stuck your tongue out at your friends which in return gave you a growl from Carlos and Melissa who needed you to sit still.

After what felt like an eternity you were done and now it was time for your bridesmaids to get ready. They purposefully taped a piece of cloth over all mirrors so could only see yourself when you were 100% finished with getting ready.

Now that you had some time to actually think about today, your mind started to wander. Was Charlie ready by now or were there some complications? Tris did get a call earlier to then just run out of the room and come back 20 minutes later. What suit would he wear? Was he just as nervous as you? Totally unaware of how much time you passed, you were ripped out of your thoughts with a forceful swat on your shoulder.

“Miss Bride? It’s time to get the dress on.” Tris squealed.

You took a look at your best friends who looked absolutely stunning, at some time they got changed into their dresses. Emi smiled at you with a glossed lipped smile, her brown hair up in a bun while little strands of glitter strings framed her face. She wore a turquoise halter dress with some nude heels. Tris wore a bit of a darker turquoise strapless dress, her colourful hair falling straight over her shoulder. Both had simple makeup, a nude smokey eye with eyeliner.

Your eyes started to tear up. “Guys...you look absolutely stunning.” Emi walked over to you and embraced you in a hug. “We look really fudhing good but you’re gonna look even better. Now hop hop get undressed we have to lace up the dress.”

While your friends were working on lacing your dress up, you wondered out loud. “How much do we wanna bet that Owen lost the rings?” You chuckled and then yelled, “That's way too tight!”

“Oh Owen is so gonna lose the rings but we'll be fine. You’re gonna have rings or I'll run and get you some new ones.” Tris reassured you with a smile.

“Can I finally look at myself? I want to see if I look like a bride.” Emi and Tris shared a quick look before agreeing. Emi ripped the cloth away from the closest mirror. An audible gasp was all that was heard, everybody fixated on your reaction to yourself.

“I look like a real ass bride. I- oh my god… I look so good.” You coaxed out, trying not to cry, this got all a bit real too fast.

And you really did look amazing. Your open hair fell over your shoulders and ended right underneath your boob. It had a lot of volume and little glitter braids in it and Melissa had curled them to perfection so they framed your face perfectly. Your makeup was stunning as well, the reddish-brown and glittery smokey eye complementing your skin tone and eye colour. Carlos finished the look with a pinkish nude lipstick. You were glowing.

The cream coloured dress sat perfectly on your figure, the A-line cut highlighting your waist, the flowery lace flowing from the corset top down to your feet. The dress was poofy but not too much. You looked more like Sofie from Mamma Mia and less like Cinderella. You adjusted the straps and smiled at yourself.

“And I’m telling you, Charlie will bawl his eyes out when he sees you.” Emi patted your back and finished lacing up your dress. Tris couldn't contain herself anymore and let out a little sob “I’m sorry. You just look so gorgeous. I can’t believe you're getting married.” You pulled her into a hug.

“We don't have that much time anymore. the photographer should be here in five minutes to take your bridal pictures and pictures with the bridesmaids.”

The photo session went by quickly and you could tell that they turned out amazingly, by the way, Paul, the photographer, smiled at his screen. Megan, Charlie's sister and your other Bridesmaid came in at the last minute, due to the fact that she just flew in in the morning.

Then it was time for the first look. At first, you weren't sure if you should do this or if it would be better if the first look would be at the ceremony itself. You thought it would be funny to send Tris to the first look instead of you. So you, Megan and Emi sat in the hotel room waiting patiently.

The door opened “You two are really made for each other.” Tris came back in with a huge smile on her face. “Why? What happened?” You asked, the nervousness in your voice was evident. “Was he mad?”. She started to laugh “No absolutely not because he had the same idea as you and sent Owen.”

The room erupted in laughter “Oh no he didn't!” “Of course he did”

The next couple of hours flew by so quickly. You got to the venue. Your parents came by to say hello to you and to shed some tears. They also told you that most of the guests have arrived and everybody is waiting excitedly.

Finally, it was time. You nervously cracked your fingers, as you waited for all the guests to take a seat, the closed door in front of you the only thing shielding you from your fiance, your dad standing beside you in a suit.

“Nervous?” he asked you with a slight smile, you could tell that he was trying hard not to cry.

“Very. But I’m telling you if he doesn't cry I'll turn around and we gotta try again.” you joked.

“Oh my dear...he will.” he quickly took a look at his watch and then linked his arm with yours.

“Ready?” you shot him a smile and nodded “As ready as I'll ever be.”

The outside speakers started to play the instrumental version of Cherry Wine by Hozier and the doors opened.

It was mid-May and you and Charlie decided on an Outside wedding. After searching for a great venue you finally found one. It was an old brick house with a small colonnade of bushes in the garden. It was absolutely perfect but you didn't even look at the decorations because as soon as your eyes met his, the world stood still.

He stood at the front of the colonnade where some candles burned beside him. He wore a forest green tuxedo and that dashing smile of his. The closer you got, the more you saw how much he was crying and all you wanted to do is hug him and wipe the tears away. Your cheeks hurt from all the smiling but you couldn't stop, some tears of your own spilling out of the corners of your eyes.

You kissed your dad on the cheek and let him sit down in the front row, your eyes only momentarily leaving Charlies. “Hi, handsome.” You smiled up at him and instinctively used your thumb to wipe away some tears. “Did you cut your hair?” you asked, nodding to his now chin-length hair (think October Charlie) He grabbed your hands in his and kissed your knuckles while slightly nodding his head “You look...just wow,” he whispered so that only you could hear. You just wanted to give him a compliment when the officiant interrupted you.

“Now it's getting serious.” you said while he said “No backing out.” with a wink.

“The couple standing in front of me met at the young age of 18 in the middle of the street. Y/N bumped into Charlie here and practically fell for him right there and then. She shot him a quick sorry and went her way but the universe knew that these two needed to be together so the next day he bumped into her, totally accidental of course.” the crowd laughed and you and Charlie beamed at each other. “Sadly for Y/N that day she carried an expensive Cake that flew to the other side of the pavement. Charlie felt so bad that he promptly invited her to the next bakery where they got a cup of coffee and a new cake. Today we’re gathered here today to celebrate that love.”

“I believe that the two of you wrote your own vows? Y/N would you like to start?” You nodded and turned around to take a piece of paper from Emi who stood behind you, already missing the warmth of his hands in yours.

“Charlie, you know I’m not very good with words so I really struggled to write this, but here we are standing in front of your family and friends to share our love. I knew I loved you…” your voice wavered and you let out a sob “sorry...I knew I loved you in the first week that we’ve met. We sat on a bench in the little park right around the corner from where we met. You were late and totally out of breath when you arrived. You apologized like crazy but I didn't care, you don't know this but I had a really shitty day that day and just seeing you made it all worth it. That smile of yours knocked me off my feet completely.

From that day on I only loved you more and more. I love the way you try to wake up every day with a smile. The way you always seem to have so much energy and that you try to share that energy and love with the whole world. I love waking up in your arms because they feel like home and I miss you like crazy when I don't see you for a day.

I never really believed in love at first sight before I met you and I’m so glad that you ruined my cake. I promise to try and make you smile at least twice a day, to listen and care for you, to dance with you in the kitchen while our pizza is in the oven. I also promise to try your questionable food combinations at least once every time.

I can’t promise you that we won't fight or that we won't have our ups and downs but I will promise that we’ll work it out, that we’re not going to bed with grudges, to talk about our problems and thoughts and to always make up. I promise to be your partner in crime and to take all the blame if we ever get caught and lastly, and most importantly...

I promise to love you more and more until my heart stops beating, even when the day comes that we're old and grey, I promise to always see you with the same eyes and the same heart that I see you with at this exact moment.” You took a deep breath to try and stop your sobbing. Now it was Charlie's turn to wipe away some tears.

“Baby, don’t cry your makeup will get ruined.” he joked and you let out a small laugh. “Charlie, I believe now it's your turn to speak your vow.”

He took a shaky breath in before taking a folded piece of paper from the inside of his tuxedo pocket. “I want to start off with a simple I love you. I love the way you still give me butterflies every time I see you. I love the way you care not only for me but for everyone around you. I love the way you're patient with me. I love how much you're willing to try new things with me to make me happy because you really didn't like swimming with sharks. I admire how hard you work to help others and above all, I love how you love me.

It's in the way you look at me with such patience and compassion, the way you listen to me even if I'm rambling on, the way you push me to try harder even when I feel like I've done enough. You love me without judgment and chose to see the beauty in my flaws. Today, I want to make promises to you that I will always keep. I promise to love you back forever and harder each day. I promise never to get angry at you for making honest mistakes, even if I asked you to turn the lights off every night for the past week...

I promise to never stop holding your hand or give you a goodbye kiss. I promise to walk through life, as your biggest fan, your shoulder to lean on, and your best friend and I vow to stay silly, to never take ourselves too seriously, and stay just immature enough for cake and breakfast for dinner.

You're my soldier, my lover and above all, my best friend and I'm so excited to spend the rest of my life with you.”

Both of you were grinning and crying like idiots. “Now can we have the rings please?” the officiant asked the crowd and a teary-eyed Owen stepped forward the rings clutched in his hands.

“Thank you.” the officiant gave each of you a ring. “Do you Y/N Y/L/ want to take this man as your husband in sickness and in health?”

“I do.” You smiled up at Charlie and slid the ring on his left ring finger. “Oh good it fits,” you murmured and made him chuckle.

“And do you Charlie Gillespie want to take this woman as your wife in sickness and in health?”

“I do.” He grinned widely and also slid the ring on your left hand.

“I now pronounce you husband and wife. Charlie, you may kiss the bride.” Your lips locked with his and you couldn't be happier. Your hands found their way into his hair while his hands gripped your waist. His lips were soft and warm and you missed them dearly in the night the two of you were apart. The crowd cheered when he dipped you.

“I present to you for the first time Mr and Mrs Gillespie!”

[troubatrain]

afterglow - k. hayes

a/n: a repost from my old blog!

You were having the day from hell. You were late for a work meeting, which only ended in being berated by your boss for the third time this week. You were positive she was just trying to push you to quit, which is just wonderful. You’d barely been working there a year, and the thing that you sacrificed for that job was one of the hardest decisions you’d ever made. Then, in true New York City fashion, you were six blocks from a subway station and it started to downpour on your walk home. You finally walk into your apartment, kicking off your now soaked beyond belief heels, walking into your kitchen immediately and grabbing a bottle of wine out of your fridge. You sigh, pouring it and taking it into your bedroom.

The worst part of your day was still looming. You pull out a box, filled to the brim with the memories of your past relationship. You called Kevin a week ago, after running into Mika at the Starbucks a few blocks away from MSG. You remembered you had a box with his, and you offered it to him when he came to play the Rangers. You didn’t think you would even get an answer, and you knew Kevin left things everywhere and he’d just replace them like it never happened. You couldn’t even remember how many ties of his would go missing by the time he would come back from a road trip. But, Kevin answered that he would swing by and grab them after his flight landed. You hadn’t seen Kevin since the night you kicked him out of your apartment, far too livid at him to form words.

February 25, 2018

You were on edge all day. Kevin had mentioned to you when you started dating that he might not be in New York all season. You both decided to ignore that, pretending like it wasn’t happening until it was. You had only been seeing each other for a few months, but with Kevin, you knew it would be him forever. 

You stared at the TV in shock, mouth hanging open at the news.

Kevin Hayes traded to the Winnipeg Jets

You didn’t care what the Rangers had gotten in return, you didn’t care about how far away Winnipeg was, you cared that your entire world was just torn apart. You hadn’t been dating long at the time, a mere six months, which put you in a bizarre position about what the future would hold for the two of you. You sat in your apartment in the West Village, waiting for Kevin to make the short trip from Chelsea. 

“Babe?” You hear him unlock the door with the key you’d given him a month ago.

“You’re leaving,” You whisper lowly, not wanting to admit to yourself.

“Y/N, it’s going to be okay, we’ll work it out. You can come with me, in the off-season I’ll sign a new deal and we’ll start making a new home for ourselves,” Kevin says softly, baby blue eyes looking into yours as he kneels in front of you on the couch to get eye-level with you. 

“Kev I can’t just pick up and leave, I have work and a life here,” You tried to explain, you’d moved to New York when you were 18 and headed to NYU, bright eyed and full of hope, and stayed after graduation, building a career for yourself in the city. You loved New York, the culture, the atmosphere, and on most nights the people. You’d just taken your dream job, and you weren’t in any position to give it up.

“I can take care of you, come September we’ll be able to settle down somewhere else,” Kevin whispers, resting his large hand on your thigh.

“I don’t want that Kev!” You shout, not realizing your voice had risen, “I did all of this on my own, I’m not going to let you just take care of me, you know that.”

“Y/N what am I supposed to do? This my job, I don’t have a choice, I told you this might happen,” Kevin shouts back. 

He was right, he told you after your first date that he wasn’t sure if he would even be a Ranger for the rest of the season. His contract was going to expire and the team was in a rebuild, he knew if he had a good season he would be gone by the deadline.

“Kevin, I’m not that girl,” You start, you were upset and you were lashing out at Kevin for even asking you to leave New York, “I’m not going to follow you around and give my dreams for your job.”

“I’ve never asked you to be,” Kevin shouts back, “Can you be the kind of girl who’s there for me?”

“I’m sure you can find her in Winnipeg,” You deadpan, crossing your arms at him. It was the first time you’d ever fought, and most definitely the first time Kevin’s ever raised his voice at you. His face was red, veins popping out of his neck. He was mad, and you were mad that he couldn’t understand where you were coming from. Kevin was more traditional than you, and while it made him a gentleman, it made it hard for him to get that you liked to work.

“You want me to go off to Winnipeg and find another girl?” Kevin asks, his tone harsh, “It would make road trips fun again.”

His last words were muttered under his breath, but that didn’t mean you didn’t hear them. The second the words slipped out of his mouth, you both went silent. His sentence rocked your world. You never thought Kevin would cheat on you, he’d always made it clear to you that he was yours and you were his. But, the way the words fell out so easily made your skin crawl. You wanted to scream, cry, and fight with him for the next day - but you weren’t being given that time.

“Kevin, just go, I’m sure you need to pack,” You say, tears threatening to spill. 

He stands in the doorway, debating whether or not to leave, he looks at you defeated and walks out of your apartment. You sat on the floor of your apartment that night, tears flooding out of your eyes while you wore Kevin’s too big Red Sox hoodie that you loved so much.

--

You wipe a little dust off the box, it's been almost a year since that night. You’d seen Kevin, on the internet at least, not being able to stop yourself from Instagram stalking your ex-boyfriend. You unfollowed all of his friends, and most of his family - only following his sister just because you liked to see pictures of his niece. Which was fine, until she posted a video of Kevin trying to braid her hair when they headed to Winnipeg to visit, and you cried in the bathroom at work. You opened it, trying to even remember what was inside.

You pulled out a few of his hoodies, because his clothes were always thrown around your apartment. You laugh, pulling out the Patriots hoodie you’d borrowed after the first night you crashed in his apartment. You wore it on the walk back, ignoring hollers about the sports team on your chest while you weaved through the streets of Manhattan while you took a walk of shame back to your place. You hold the gray fabric in your hands, remembering the way it felt - soft like Kevin always was with you. You pull out a couple of his beanies, remember how many he would leave at your house and then just buy another because he forgot about it. You pulled out a few ticket stubs, random concerts you’d both been to that you tossed in there when you broke up. Then you hit the two small velvet boxes that you never stopped thinking about.

You pulled out the first box, opening it to reveal the necklace Kevin had gotten you for Christmas. It was so perfect, you were positive Brady’s girlfriend had to have helped him pick it out. You only tried to wear it once after you broke up, but the memories that flooded back when you put it on was too much. Then there was the other box. Kevin had gotten you the most beautiful ring you’d ever seen in your life for your birthday. He claimed it didn’t mean anything, but when his eyes sparkled when you slipped it on your left hand, to try it on in the restaurant you were in, you thought it may mean more than he was leading on. It was your favorite piece of jewelry, the ring was dainty and small just the way you liked it. You were surprised Kevin even picked it out, considering he lived by the motto that the bigger the better, but he told you he knew you needed it when he saw it in a shop window on a roadtrip in Chicago. You drop the box, hoping maybe he would give it to someone else one day, if there wasn't someone else already.

You hear your someone try to buzz into your building and you knew it had to be Kevin. You carry the box with you in the living room, buzzing him in and dropping it on the island in your kitchen. You sigh, hearing his heavy footsteps come down the door, opening it and letting himself in.

“Hey,” You say, your voice small.

“Hey,” Kevin breathes out, you were both nervous which you guess could be a good thing. He looked different, his hair was a little longer and his beard a little fuller. 

Suddenly, as if the universe decided to lay it all on you today, the power in your apartment shuts out, a loud crash of thunder following. You jump, feeling Kevin’s large hands on your shoulders when you do.

“Fuck, give me a minute,” You mutter, running into your room to grab some candles. You spread them around your apartment, lighting them until your apartment wasn’t completely dark.

“All of downtown is in a blackout,” Kevin says, reading the news on his phone, “Like all of it.”

You bite your lip, debating your options. You shouldn’t let Kevin go back out in this weather, and with no power on one half of Manhattan, it wasn’t a great idea. 

“You should stay, til this all blows over,” You offer, gesturing to your island where the box sat.

“That’s my stuff?” Kevin asks, opening the box and smiling at the contents. You watch them sift through the box, a wide smile on his face that could barely make out in the glow of the candles that littered your apartment. His hands gripped the same velvet box you dropped in just before he arrived.

“You should keep these,” Kevin says, “They were gifts.”

“Give them to someone else one day,” You whisper, sitting on your counter while you watched him, “That’s what you wanted right?”

You didn’t realize the words came out of your mouth. You’d been harboring this feeling of resentment for so long, your entire world was crushed in a matter of a night and you just wanted some closure. You thought you could get it by just giving him his stuff back, but it still wasn’t enough.

“I didn’t want that,” Kevin says back, “You said it first!”

“You asked me to be someone I wasn’t Kevin,” You say, your voice rising, “That wasn’t fair to me!”

“It wasn’t fair to me that I had to leave, but I did,” Kevin shouts, “And all I wanted was for you to come with me, because I love you.”

“Do you think that it was fucking easy to let you go? Or that I didn’t spend months of my life regretting it? Because I did,” You yell, tears welling up in your eyes, “Congrats Kevin you win, I was fucking miserable without you and the reason I stayed in New York isn’t working out.”

You stomp into your room, slamming the door and sliding down it. You finally just let yourself cry. About that fucking night. About losing the love of your life for some job that isn’t working out. About ruining your own happiness because you could just compromise once. Kevin knocked lightly on the other side, finally giving up after what was probably his hundredth time, sliding down the other side of your bedroom door.

“It was really lonely up there” Kevin whispers, loud enough for you to hear through the door, “In Winnipeg.”

Kevin talked for an hour. He talked about Winnipeg, how no matter what he did he couldn’t stop thinking about you. How he wishes you could have been there. He talked about his summer in Boston, mentioning how his sister got married and he wished you were there. He talked about how his mom asked about you all summer, but he just kept brushing it off because he couldn’t tell her it was his fault. Which leads up to now, where he is finally getting to the new city he set roots in.

“-I like Philly,” Kevin whispers, “You would too, everyone there is great. You’d love my teammates, and they’d love you.”

“Kev?” You finally say, your voice still trembling, “What happened to us?”

“I don’t know,” Kevin says back, his head tapping the door, “I didn’t mean what I said, I don’t know why I said it, but I didn’t mean it.”

“We were both upset, about everything,” You say back, standing up and opening the door, “I’m sorry for telling you to go find someone else.”

Kevin stands up, his hands finding both sides of your face to wipe away the stray tears that were left, “I’m never going to find someone else.”

“Kevin, I can’t pick up and run off with you,” You say, repeating the same thing you did a few months ago, “Just not right now.”

“Philly is barely three hours away,” Kevin counters, “I’m willing to do it if you are, because I can’t walk out of here without trying.”

You finally place your lips on his, soft and slow at first. But when your hands found the back of Kevin’s neck, playing with the hair that was starting to curl, you could feel him grunt into your mouth and you smiled against his lips because you knew it drove him crazy. That was the point, you knew everything about him because he was yours, and you were his.

[redhoodieone]

Hate You More

A new fic that I was inspired to write! There will be a Part 2 since this is going to get VERY smutty. Enjoy!

WARNINGS: Language. Mentions a little smut.

I’m a princess. Well, a “bit” of a princess. But that’s not exactly my fault. I’m an only child. My mom and dad always wanted one kid and once they had me they were happy...until they divorced when I was eight-years-old and my dad left somewhere far away. Ever since then, it was always just me and mom, which was never a bad thing.

We were close and got along just fine. Every weekend was our Nicholas Sparks movie marathons on the couch, eating a shit ton of strawberry ice cream straight from the carton, and painting each other’s nails and having her braid my hair and tell me stories of when I was little.

Everything was perfect with just me and my mom...until she married him.

Bruce Wayne.

I never thought my mom would ever want to remarry but Bruce somehow stole her heart and made her fall in love with him.

I didn’t want to blame her for being so stupid for marrying him. I mean, Bruce did treat my mom right. I just hated him so much for convincing my mom to move us into his mansion.

So far away from my first home.

But I know he really loves her, despite being known as a billionaire playboy, womanizing, man whore. After three years into their marriage, I noticed he really cared about me and treated me like his daughter; certainly overprotective and reminding me if I ever needed anything to always go to him.

He even helped me get into GCU. With his help, I’m now into my second year. He’s really proud that I’m a responsible, twenty-one year old college student, and that makes me feel good.

But it hasn’t always been perfect with Bruce. Not only did I get a stepdad, but I got THREE asshole stepbrothers: Dick, Jason, and Tim. They’re the boys Bruce adopted.

Dick wasn’t exactly an asshole. He’s twenty-five years old and he’s always in and out of the mansion. He’s a party animal and I rarely see him unless he’s home for Sunday dinners and for Alfred to do his laundry.

Tim is tolerable. He’s always kind to me, but he’s also a shy and awkward fourteen-year-old. He’s seriously a nerd and he’s becoming an addict to coffee and always being on his computer. But he doesn’t bother me at all.

Not like Jason Fucking Todd.

He’s twenty-one years old and is a complete lazy ass who mooches on everyone.

I honestly hated him the second I met Jason. The second my mom and I moved into the mansion, I had set down backpack on the kitchen counter so I could remove my sweater and throw away the empty bag of fried fast food I had for lunch. The moment I turned around, Jason had jumped up to sit on the kitchen counter and had the nerve to pick up my backpack and throw it to the floor.

“Oops! Your shit was in my spot.”

I had my fucking cell phone, laptop, and picture frames of my family in there.

And that’s how it all started. Jason made it very clear he hates me and I refuse to back down and be nice to him. I mean, the fucking asshole has zero respect for me anyways. All he does is drink, eat all the food, and bring bar sluts home to fuck loudly in his bedroom which is right NEXT DOOR TO MINE!!!

All night and early in the mornings. All I can hear is Jason’s headboard slamming repeatedly against the wall and his bimbos screaming, “Oh God! Right there, Jay! Oh my God, HARDER!”

Seeing him afterwards is worse though. I could be walking to the bathroom or the kitchen and he’d just happen to come by to use the bathroom too, or get a drink of water...only using a sheet that’s wrapped around his waist!

He’d fucking smirk at me and I would try so hard to not look down at his big bulge and thick hard on.

Jason is my stepbrother...only my stepbrother, I constantly remind myself.

But Jason is also an asshole. He may look sexy and taste delicious but his one unattractive flaw is his behavior.

And I’m not one to sit back and let assholes walk all over me. I do get back at Jason quite a bit; enough to piss him off.

Today is one of the days I decide to have a big appetite. After my shower, I run downstairs only wearing my comfy pajama short shorts and a black tank top. I remember Dick is at his own apartment and Alfred is away in London on “holiday” as he calls it. Entering the kitchen, I see Mom making breakfast for us: pancakes, bacon, and sausage.

Bruce is sitting at the kitchen table, drinking his coffee and reading on his cellphone. Tim is drinking a cup of coffee (maybe 5th refill?) and eating pancakes and some sausage.

“Good morning,” I say to all of them.

“Good morning sweetie,” Mom replies with such a warm motherly smile.

Bruce grins at me. “Good morning, Y/N.”

All Tim does is nod his head to me and continues to eat.

“I’m starving,” I say and already fill my plate with two pancakes and some bacon and sausage as well.

I take a seat next to Tim and dig in. Ace, Bruce’s dog moves closer to my feet and looks up at me for some food. Fucking puppy dog eyes...I sneak a few pieces of bacon to him.

Mom eventually sits down with hers and Bruce’s plate. He smiles lovingly at her and the two kiss.

It’s a calming morning. Everyone’s eating and just enjoying the silence...until the asshole comes into the kitchen.

Jason literally has no shame. He comes in only wearing his black boxers and has very cute bed head. Stop it, Y/N. He’s completely shirtless. Not even acknowledging he’s in the kitchen, Jason quickly makes a plate for himself which he only puts three pancakes and like two handful sizes of bacon.

I silently growl and tighten my hand around my fork as I’m stuck looking at his bare, muscular upper body. His arms look strong. He’s just...all muscle. All man.

But then I remember he’s a fucking asshole and I hate him.

As if he can feel my eyes on him, Jason quickly glances at me and smirks. He actually fucking flexes his muscles for me.

I immediately look down because I just know my cheeks are red like tomatoes. God, does he have to be so attractive???

“Good morning, princess,” Jason taunts me, after greeting everyone else, obviously. He sits directly in front of me with that shit eating grin. “Did you sleep well last night?”

I glare at him. Fuck him. “Yeah, I did. You know very well that I can’t sleep peacefully unless you bring a whore home and fuck her until she’s blue in the face, Jason. I mean, when it’s so quiet at night, I just can’t fall asleep! It’s impossible! It’s like I HAVE to hear you fuck just to go to sleep!” I say sarcastically.

“So, you do listen to me when I fuck my girls, huh? Is your sex life nonexistent that you have to get yourself off on others who actually get off?” Jason jokes and shoves a piece of bacon in his mouth. “That’s pretty pathetic, even for you, Y/N. At least Tiny Tim here watches internet porn. Maybe you should start getting yourself off with that instead of listening to me fuck.”

“Jason...” Bruce warns. “Don’t even start this morning.”

“Start what? I’m not even doing anything,” Jason says. He raises an eyebrow at me and keeps that fucking smirk on his face.

“Leave Y/N alone, Jason,” Tim butts in.

“Quiet Timbers. Let the princess tell me off. I love it when she gets all red and pissed off.”

My mom glances at me with a serious look, too. Why is she giving me that look when I didn’t even do anything?!

“Aw, there’s sausage?! I didn’t know there was sausage up there!” Jason whines. His eyes dart from my plate over to my mom and Bruce.

“I actually served the last few pieces to Bruce. I’m sorry, Jason,” my mom apologizes. She frowns and looks down at hers and Bruce’s empty plates.

“That’s all right. I see there’s still five uneaten sausages on Y/N’s plate,” Jason says and smirks at me. He looks down at my plate and back up at me. “You’re not going to eat them, are you princess? Because if not, I want them.”

He’s fucking teasing me. Jason is mocking me with those green eyes and that fucking smile that wets every girl’s panties. It’s like he actually believes he’s going to get away with this. He really thinks he’s going to get what he wants. Jason slowly reaches a hand towards my plate to get my sausages.

I want to burst his cocky bubble in front of everyone.

“Actually...I’m going to give them to the dog. And by dog, I mean Ace,” I say, quickly grabbing all the sausages in my hand and feed them to Ace under the table. “You see, I don’t feed dirty dogs like you. Ace is a clean, loyal, and sweet dog. You on the other hand are a dirty, disgusting, slut who fucks anything with a hole.”

My sudden outburst startles everyone at the table. I see everyone’s wide eyes and open mouths hanging in shock at me.

Jason chuckles lowly. His eyes are full of anger and hatred for me. “What did you just say to me?” he asks.

“You heard me,” I reply with the same tone. “Unless you lost your hearing due to all the screaming from the banshee skank you brought home last night from only God knows where.”

“You know, you’re starting to sound like a jealous bitch. For someone who has claimed to hate me and not want anything to do with me on multiple occasions, you seem to be really obsessed about my sex life,”

“Oh please, don’t flatter yourself,”

“Y/N stop,” my mom says.

“You think I’m flattering myself?! I’m not the one who always checks myself out! You know, I always see you staring at me right?! If anything, you’re flattered by me!” Jason snaps.

“ENOUGH!!!” Bruce shouts.

We’re all silent but Jason and I continue to stare each other down.

“I’ve had enough of the two of you fighting! It’s old and it’s seriously ridiculous. It needs to end now. Your mother and I are going to leave for Spain tonight, and I don’t want to hear anything bad about the two of you while we’re gone. Now, apologize to each other,” Bruce says.

“Apologize to the princess? For what?! She’s a fucking bitch, who’s always bitching, and she’s basically the biggest bitch who ever bitched!” Jason yells. “She should apologize to me!”

“If I’m a fucking bitch then that makes you the biggest asshole here! You’re literally the most disgusting, disrespectful, lazy ass guy I have ever met! You have NO respect for anyone who lives here! Why should I fucking apologize to you?! All you do is drink, eat all the food, and bring random whores to our house and force us all to listen to you have sex!” I yell back.

“Our house? You think this is your house, too? I hate to burst your “bitching bubble” sweetheart, but this isn’t your house! You’re extra baggage that had to be dragged here! Your mom was wanted here; not you. As far as I’m concerned, you’re not even family!” Jason yells louder than before.

My bottom lip trembles uncontrollably. I feel tears running down my cheeks. I need to get out of here before I completely break down in front of Jason.

“You’re such a fucking asshole, Jason!” I choke out.

I quickly jump out of my seat and run up the stairs. After I slam my bedroom door, I throw myself down onto my bed and cry. I can even hear Bruce screaming his head off and tearing Jason a new one.

——————————————————————————

I wake up to an empty stomach. Rolling over onto my back, I rub my eyes and yawn. It’s dark in my bedroom; indicating it’s already nighttime. I reach for my cellphone on my nightstand and see it’s already eight o’clock.

I must have been really exhausted to have slept the day away. Those days usually happen after I cry a lot and feel like shit.

Mom and Bruce are probably already gone. Their Spain trip is only for the weekend. I’m seriously glad about that since I don’t know how I’m going to get through the weekend with Jason still around.

Maybe if I’m lucky he’s already at the bar and picking up skanks. That means I have time to eat and a few hours of silence for myself.

I decide to go downstairs and I instantly notice all the lights are off except for the kitchen light. Slowly stepping into the kitchen, I see it’s empty and that there’s a big box of pizza and two drinks; a bottle of beer and a glass of orange juice with the bottle of Vodka next to it.

Raising an eyebrow in question, I look around to see who did this. Noticing the back sliding door is open, I walk over slowly to peek out.

Jason.

On the phone and sitting at the patio table.

He doesn’t see me but I can hear him clearly.

“Do you think she’ll really like it?”

[justsomeoneunordinary]

Solo Tu

Day 4 of @winteriron-week​: Fluff

Yeah, I said in the last fic that I’d combine day 3 and 4, but I don’t like how it looks like with one missing, so I still wrote this for day 4 specifically.

Also, there is obviously absolutely no chance that I’ll manage finishing the remaining prompts until Wednesday when the collection closes. While I’m a little bit disappointed in myself for that (even though it’s not my fault real life is a thing and got in the way), I still wanna write them all, just because. So, while they won’t be in the collection anymore, I will continue to upload them here on Tumblr as well as on AO3.

T, 1.4k, Tooth-Rotting Fluff With Absolutely Zero Plot Whatsoever | AO3

(Day 1 / Day 2 / Day 3)

—

Solo tu

Col calore

Quel mattino che rinasce

Intorno al sole

Cosa puo’ piu’ importare

Se la pelle tua si lascia accarezzare

The soft melody of the Italian song woke Bucky. He felt a hand brush through his hair and the smell of coffee rose immediately to his nostrils as he took a deep breath and slowly stretched.

“Your hair is so soft,” Tony murmured as he began to gently pluck on individual strands. “I still don’t know how you do it. After all, we use the same conditioner.”

Bucky just grunted and buried his face deeper into Tony’s lap. A breeze blew through the open window and carried in the smell of the salt water, which blended together with that of the coffee, and automatically put a smile on his face.

“Must be the super soldier serum,” Tony concluded.

This made Bucky snort. “What, you think the serum enhanced my hair’s smoothness?”

“How else can you be two thousand years old and still not suffer from hair loss?” Bucky could literally hear the triumphant grin in Tony’s voice, he didn’t even have to look up.

“Two thousand? Honey, I think you miscalculated a little.”

“Nonsense, I’m a genius—my math is always right.”

Bucky felt another tug of his hair, this time a little firmer than before, and whatever Tony was up to, it couldn’t be good. “Tony, are you trying to pull my hair out of envy? If so, I can assure you that your hair is at least just as beautiful, especially with the gray areas.”

Tony laughed. “‘At least just as beautiful’, you are not exactly modest.” He continued to pull his hair and explained, “No, you dork. I’m braiding it.” As if it were a matter of course.

“Oh, great. Can’t wait to unknot my hair later.”

This earned him a slight pinch on the ear. “Listen, Barnes, I won’t tolerate such disrespect here.”

Bucky grinned and finally opened his eyes, looking up at Tony’s mock insulted expression, because for what he said next, he wanted to see the reaction, “It’s Stark-Barnes now, get your facts straight.”

And yep, there it was: Tony’s eyes immediately shone with joy, emphasized by the morning sun, which turned the wonderful brown into a brilliant gold. A faint smile formed on his lips and it was as if his face were beaming in competition with the sun.

Bucky couldn’t help but take Tony’s left hand in his and kiss the golden ring on his finger, never taking his eyes off Tony’s.

Four days. Four days since they had said “Yes, I do” and retired for their honeymoon here at the Carbonell residence in Sicily. Just the two of them, this way too big house and the sea.

“I ordered F.R.I.D.A.Y. to only disturb us in an emergency. And only if the world is about to doom. Which means, neither an Avengers nor an SI problem will be able to get in our way,” Tony had explained with a grin when they got here and then dragged Bucky to bed without any warning.

With every morning he woke up, Bucky was struck by the wonder that this was indeed real. That after everything they’d both been through, he could still find happiness with Tony. Sometimes the world did give something back.

“God, you’re so cheesy,” Tony complained half-heartedly, while the smile didn’t leave his lips.

Bucky merely raised an eyebrow and pointed with a look at the loudspeaker from which the song was still being played, because…

Solo tu

Stamattina per alzarmi è ancora giorno insieme a te

… not only he was cheesy.

Tony, however, didn’t see the subtle hint, or ignored it (probably the latter) and went back to working on Bucky’s hair.

“Can I at least drink my coffee first since you’ve already made it?”

“No.”

“But then it will get cold until you are finished with the braiding!” Bucky gave him his best pout, which Tony never was able to refuse.

Apart from today, apparently. “It’s Italian coffee, it’s still good cold too,” Tony said, turning his head vigorously. “Now hold still so I don’t screw it up.”

Bucky thought about saying something along the lines of “I only like it when you’re bossy during sex” but knew that Tony would just wink at him and then tease him on purpose. And he admittedly had nothing to complain about; Tony’s hands in his hair felt heavenly. Tony worked gently and carefully, and Bucky could feel a slight vibration as Tony began to hum along with the song. If he hadn’t already been well rested, he could easily have been lulled into sleep like this.

“My mamma,” Tony began to say after a few seconds of silence, “used to wear her hair waist-length when I was a child. A silky blonde that shone like the sun in the light and had utterly fascinated me. I had always watched her with curiosity as she braided it until one day, she taught me to do it for her.”

Bucky ignored the heavy pressures of guilt as best he could whenever Tony talked about his mother. They had discussed the Winter Soldier’s actions long ago and got them out of the way—Bucky knew Tony was telling these things to him not out of malice but because he wanted to share his memories with Bucky.

However, not having a guilty conscience would never be possible for him.

“After that I did her hair almost every day until I was about nine years old,” Tony finished, a tender expression on his face that spoke of wistfulness and nostalgia. Bucky gasped for a moment when Tony turned his head to the side so that the sunrays fell directly on him—tanned skin golden in the glow, eyes shining like amber and contour framed tightly by light.

If there was a God, Tony had to be one of his celestial beings that he had sent to earth. And he was Bucky’s only.

Bucky wanted nothing more than to pull Tony down and seal his lips with Tony’s sinful ones, but the slight pulling of his hair reminded him not to move, so he was content with just taking in every detail of this paradisical picture above him in order to keep it in his memories forever.

“Now,” Tony took a red hair tie from the nightstand that was right next to the two coffee cups—he must have planned that braiding session—and wrapped it at the end of Bucky’s hair, “done.”

Bucky ran his hand over what was, judging by the pattern, a herringbone braid and smiled at Tony. “How do I look?”

“Like a princess,” came the prompt reply.

“But then I also want some flowers decorated with it. For authenticity.”

Tony laughed out loud at that. “There are some hibiscus flowers growing here, if I remember correctly, so that really shouldn’t be a problem.”

Bucky would have flowers in his hair every day without hesitation if it made Tony laugh like that. “Perfect,” he whispered, and finally sat up to kiss Tony. Tony’s lips on his was a feeling he couldn’t imagine ever getting tired of. If it were possible, he would just never stop.

Tony grinned into the kiss and when they parted, Bucky knew immediately what was coming at the sight of the mischief in his eyes. “Coffee first and then sex? After all, we’re already in bed. Well, technically still, but who cares about this kind of trivialities anyway.”

Called it. In response, he raised an eyebrow and asked, “Isn’t the beach private?”

Tony, genius that he was, didn’t take long to understand. “Oh, I like the way you think! See, this is exactly why I married you.”

“Because of the sex?”

“Precisely.”

Bucky couldn’t help but pull Tony on his shirt and kiss the cheeky grin off his face once again. In the background he heard the sound of the waves, as well as the last tones of the song, the smell of coffee and salt water still lingered in the air—and Tony’s mouth tasted of love.

Whatever their future might bring, Bucky knew he could handle it with Tony by his side. Today, tomorrow and as long as they were lucky, however, they would just enjoy themselves and their togetherness.

And then, once they got back to their chaotic everyday life, they would do it hand in hand together.

Solo tu

Mi sai dare

Cose vecchie sempre nuove da sognare

Mille volte tu lo sai

Non è stato uguale mai

—

Solo Tu by Matia Bazar

(I got the translations from an unofficial site, so I don’t know how true they are. To be fair: it’s cheesy and that’s actually all you really need to know anyway.)

Solo tu ≈ Only you

Col calore ≈ With heat

Quel mattino che rinasce ≈ That morning that is reborn

Intorno al sole ≈ Around the sun

Cosa puo’ piu’ importare ≈ What matters most

Se la pelle tua si lascia accarezzare ≈ If your skin lets you caress

&

Solo tu ≈ Only you

Stamattina per alzarmi è ancora giorno insieme a te ≈ This morning to get up is still day with you

&

Solo tu ≈ Only you

Mi sai dare ≈ You can give me

Cose vecchie sempre nuove da sognare ≈ Old things always new to dream

Mille volte tu lo sai ≈ A thousand times you know

Non è stato uguale mai ≈ It was never the same

[everlarkbirthdaygifts]

Happy Birthday, blackgem01!

Today, we wish @blackgem01 a very Happy Birthday! We hope you’ve got a wonderful day planned, and you get exactly the presents you wished for! To kick your party off in style, the lovely @mega-aulover has written a story just for you!

PROMPT:  Katniss and Peeta had a baby at a young age. Katniss decided to go off to college while Peeta stayed behind to take care of the baby and now she is coming back. (if you want to make it angsty can there be a happy ending

For: Blackgem01

A/N: Happy Birthday I hope you have a wonderful day. Thank you to @norbertsmom for betaing

Rated: T

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

“You sure she's coming back?” Rye asked.

Peeta changed his 18 month old daughter, Melody. She laughed when he tickled her, and her bright blue eyes stared up at him with glee. 

Peeta proudly winked at his baby. She’d learned to walk early. She was a good climber, too. Something he learned early on when he found her in front of the upstairs apartment.  She wasn’t talking yet, but he knew she was like her mother.

“Come on Peeta,” Rye said sitting on the bed next to Mel. 

Mel extended her leg so that Peeta could put her pants on. She smiled at him and when he leaned down, she patted his face with her little hand. 

“Rye,” Peeta warned. He didn’t want to discuss Katniss in front of the baby. 

“You’re delusional.”

“Katniss wouldn’t forget us.”  Peeta kept his voice light. His daughter was perceptive and she cried when people sounded upset or mad. 

“She was sure in a hurry to leave.” 

Peeta stopped to look at his brother in disbelief, wishing Rye would drop the matter altogether. 

“You can’t go to the train tomorrow station expecting you guys to be alright,” Rye insisted. “She’s been gone for a year doing who knows what in the Capitol.” 

“All done Mel, why don’t you go see grandpa.” Peeta put their daughter on the floor. He turned to his brother. “Rye stay out of it, this is my life with Katniss.”

“She left you and Mel to go to the Capitol and study, you guys barely talk on the phone...I think she sucks for leaving you behind with Mel.”

All these months he’d been silent about the arrangement he and Katniss made. His family and even hers wanted him to move on, find someone else. Mrs. Everdeen was upset Katniss left him with the baby. Primrose didn’t understand why she left and was angry at her. Katniss wrote to Prim and June, their mother but often the letters left untouched. 

Peeta knew the truth and that’s what really mattered. 

The opportunity for her to study something was too good for them to let go. People in district twelve didn’t get scholarships, they got a one way ticket to work in the mines or if they were lucky to work in their family business. “Rye, I told her to go.”

“I don’t believe it. I think she manipulated you.”

“Have you met Katniss,” Peeta said. 

“Well okay maybe she didn’t; she’s not exactly the most talkative person.  But why would you let her go? You’ve been in love with her since you were both five.”

Peeta heard Mel’s laughter. “How many times has district twelve won the reaping? For that matter who was the last person who won the reaping?”

Rye glanced away, knowing Peeta was right.  

The annual reaping was a scholarship that was founded when the districts won the war nearly 77 years ago.  Every year, one student was chosen from the graduating class of all the districts to study for a year in the Capitol. Katniss was chosen, but she was conflicted because they had a six month old baby. 

Peeta may have been in love with Katniss since he was five, but he didn’t get up the nerve to talk to her until they were sixteen. . Their friendship grew deeper, despite the things her former best friend Gale Hawthorne said about them, and by the time they were seniors they were in a serious relationship. They were both shocked when Katniss got pregnant. Peeta encouraged her to continue studying, bringing her assignments and tests when she was too sick to go to school. 

It wasn’t easy.  His mother wanted him to deny the child Katniss carried, while his father quietly told him he wasn’t ready for fatherhood. His father wasn’t entirely wrong; Peeta wasn’t ready to be a dad. It was a hard nine months for both of them.  It wasn’t until Mel was born did his mother come around and his parents supported them both. 

When Katniss won the reaping everyone expected her to decline it, because of the baby.  Peeta didn’t want her to lose her shot at something big. Every person who won had opportunities afforded to them. It’s why his brother was taking forever to answer.  

After a few moments Rye eventually said, “Mayor Abernathy.”

“And before that it was a wild girl named Lucy who ended up being a great entertainer in the Capitol.  I told Katniss to go, I told her to do it for our daughter.” Peeta sat on his bed, and sighed. “She didn't want to leave, but I told her she needed to because I didn’t want her to have regrets.”

“That’s all great and said, but you forget about one tiny detail, your daughter. Katniss has missed a lot of the big markers in Mel’s life.  And if by some miracle you guys have this magical reconnection and are able to pick up where you left off, just remember Mel will see Katniss as a virtual stranger.” 

Peeta watched Rye stand up and leave. His brother’s words stayed with him for the rest of the day. He hadn’t really given a thought about what it would be like to have Katniss home again. He loved her, but Rye was right. Katniss didn’t really know her daughter.  It was part of the sacrifice she made by leaving.

Katniss couldn’t come home; it was in the stipulations of the scholarship. She had to live at school and maintain a certain grade point average. She didn’t have much money and was dependent on the grant.  Calling the bakery was expensive, something she only did on major celebrations like Mel’s birthday. She did write, Katniss wrote two and three letters a week. 

Peeta wrote back filling her in on as much as he could. He even drew pictures of Mel. But still Katniss didn’t know the face Mel made when she was sleepy. Or the way she cried when she passed by a cat, thinking it was Buttercup. This next phase of their life was going to be hard. Peeta worried about Mel’s reaction to Katniss. Mel was only six months old the last time she’d been with Katniss. 

Mel hadn’t taken the loss of mommy well. She’d cried for Katniss and Peeta had seen the same tears mirrored on Katniss’ face when she left. Peeta hoped for the best but he was preparing for the worst.  

The next morning he stood with both of their families at the train station. 

Rye was making funny faces at Mel and her peal of laughter broke the tension. His mother held Mel. She’d purchased a new outfit for Mel today, a pretty dove gray dress with pink polka dots with matching grey shoes and pink pom pom hair fasteners.  His mother was smitten with her dark haired grandchild.  Mel covered her ears as the train horn sounded. She turned to him holding out her little arms toward him.  Peeta picked her up and Mel put her face in the crook of his neck. 

The train pulled in and Peeta braced himself. 

...

“You did good by her,” June Everdeen said. 

Peeta glanced at Katniss' mother, and smiled. “Thank you.”

“I hope the sacrifice was worth it,” June said as the passengers began to disembark. 

Peeta recalled Rye’s words. He held his little girl closer. He hoped he did a good enough job of talking about mommy and showing Mel images of Katniss. 

“There she is,” Prim squeaked.

Peeta didn’t see her. Katniss wasn’t tall and was easily lost in the crowd. He followed Prim who was tall and thin.

Peeta saw her, she wasn’t wearing fancy Capitol clothing, she was, however, wearing a lovely dark orange dress with small white flowers. Katniss never used to wear dresses. Her hair was in it’s customary braid. She looked unsure as if searching the crowd. When she spotted Prim her face broke out in the most beautiful smile. Peeta always thought Katniss looked stunning when she smiled. 

“Prim,” she called out running to her sister. 

“Katniss,” Prim cried as they hugged one another. 

Peeta watched both sisters talk. His heart beat quickly.  Mel whimpered. Immediately Peeta’s attention went to Mel. 

“What's wrong button,” he cooed quietly, shifting her so that he could look into her face. “Are you tired?’

Mel stuck her thumb in her mouth. 

“Okay, we’re just getting mommy, okay.” 

“She’s beautiful,” Katniss said in awe.

Peeta looked up to see Katniss staring at him, her eyes filled with tears. She reached her arms toward Mel.

Mel swatted her arms away, and screamed, “NO!”

It was Mel’s first word. Katniss looked crestfallen. Peeta sighed. This wasn’t going to go easy at all. 

Peeta looked at himself in the mirror. Today had turned into a disaster. All day long Mel scowled at Katniss. Whenever Katniss came close to Peeta, Mel pointed her finger at Katniss, garbled words Peeta had never heard his daughter say, followed by, no.  Mel refused to leave his side and Katniss looked crestfallen, then Rye made a comment that started a fight.  He closed his eyes. Everyone ganged up on Katniss about her decision to leave. 

Her mother said leaving Mel was inexcusable. Katniss fired back telling her letting her children nearly starve to death was just as bad. When Katniss' father died of an accident at work, June went into a downward spin where she became nearly catatonic. The responsibility of the house, her sister and her mother fell on Katniss shoulders. Peeta recalled hearing the adults talk about how brave Katniss was to care for her ill mother.  Now her mother turned on Katniss. 

Peeta tried to defend Katniss but his voice was silenced. Mel began crying and Katniss left the house to cool down. Their baby was finally sleeping and everyone was gone. 

“Hey,” Katniss said quietly.

He looked up from the mirror to see her reflection.  “Hi.”

Her eyes were red rimmed, her face was flushed. 

Peeta turned around. He opened his arms, and she flew into them. 

“I hoped,” Katniss cried.

He held her, letting her cry. Katniss wasn’t one for emotional outbursts. When she calmed down she said, “Mel doesn’t love me, my own sister said I shouldn’t have left, your parents…” She took a deep breath and said. “We talked about this, but I didn’t think it was going to be so hard….”

“I don’t know what to do to help you. They wouldn’t even listen to me.” 

“I had great news for everyone. A job was created for me, given my talents with herbs, fauna, and trees, as District Twelve’s forest conservationist. One of my professors, Dr. Wiress arranged for Prim to study in District Three’s Medical and Technology program. I worked in the cafeteria in school and I gave them one of the breads you sent with me. My boss wanted to talk to your dad.”  

“You’re always looking out for us.”

“You have done such a great job with Mel. She’s so beautiful and she hates me.” Katniss stepped away, she placed her hands on his shoulders. Her hands drifting down over his chest. 

Peeta shuddered at her touch. One year of waiting and longing.  “No she doesn't hate you. She doesn’t know you and to Mel you’re trying to take away her daddy. It’s going to take time to convince everyone. Now let’s get to bed and see if we can make this family of ours work.”

Katniss sighed.

They slept rather awkwardly that first night as they had to get used to sleeping together again. In the morning Mel wanted nothing to do with Katniss. 

Two weeks passed by and slowly people’s attitude about Katniss changed. His father was over the moon with the contact she gave him. He’d struck a contract with Paylor Katniss’ supervisor to supply bread to the university. Primrose was delighted at the opportunity to study in District Three.

Only their daughter and his brother were the last holdouts. 

Mel kept up saying no to Katniss and exhibited her jealousy regularly. Anytime Katniss came close to Peeta she would cry no and stomp her little foot and push Katniss away. Their daughter didn’t want to share him. 

It was bedtime, Katniss wanted to get Mel ready by giving her a bath. 

“No, dada.”  Mel stood with a scowl on her face. It was like looking into a mirror. 

“You’re going to take a bath with mommy,” Katniss said kneeling  before their daughter. She held out the small rubber duck she brought from the Capitol for Mel.

“No,” Mel swatted at the rubber duck.

“Mel,” Peeta interjected. “Not Nice.” In a firm voice he repeated, “Not nice.” 

His daughter's eyes grew wide. Peeta seldom used that tone of voice with her. Her bottom lip trembled. 

“Go to the bathroom,” he ordered, but in a softer tone.

Mel stomped off to the bathroom.

Katniss gave him a pouty look of her own before following their daughter to the bathroom. Later on, Katniss was in the bedroom folding clothing rapidly. Peeta could sense the storm coming. 

He finished cleaning up the kitchen, wanting to give Katniss enough time with Mel. Her eyes narrowed right before she said, “I could have handled the situation.”

Peeta didn’t say anything. He only took the fitted sheet she was fidgeting with and folded it neatly.

“Ugh!” Katniss huffed, her eyes fiery. 

“I had it under control, you didn’t have to intervene.” 

Peeta sighed and bit his tongue. 

“She needs to learn that I am not going anywhere.” Katniss sat on the bed and looked around. “I shouldn’t have left, Peeta. I should stayed, here with her…” 

Peeta sat next to her. “No you did the right thing,” Peata said. He didn’t want for Katniss to feel bad for the decision to go study. “Prim’s going to spend her next last two years of school in District Three studying with Dr. Wiress, one of Panem’s foremost scientific minds. And my dad’s benefiting from it too. He’s going to be able to send his bread to the capitol for the holidays. And he’s going to have the opportunity to go to the Capitol with my mom to tour the school cafeteria, and my mom’s going to get a real honeymoon.” 

Katniss' face began to lose its worry. 

“And you’re going to be doing something you love, conservation of the woods. It wouldn’t have happened if you hadn't made that sacrifice.” 

“I…” Katniss began, but trailed off.

“Come here.” Peeta sat back against the headboard inviting her to sit next to him. Katniss didn’t sit, she snuggled up against his side. Her head rested up against his chest.  Peeta sighed from the contentment of the simple gesture. Peeta missed her, missed listening to the sound of her voice. 

“I sometimes don’t see the bigger picture.”

“You just don’t know the effect you have on people, Katniss.” He placed a soft kiss on her cheek. “My mom distrusted the people from the Seam, now some of her very best friends are from the Seam. She even helped Hazelle open up her own laundry business in town.” 

“It’s true,” Katniss conceded. 

“All we have to do is teach our daughter not to hit you or anyone.”

“I was shocked.” Katniss looked up. “She just swatted at Mr. Quack.” 

“Yeah, unfortunately she gets that from my mother. Did I ever tell you my mom came to blows with Dross, the milkman?”

“Whatever for?” She picked up his hand before kissing his ring finger. In District Twelve wedding rings were expensive, so couples used twine or around their ring finger when they had their Toasting. It was a tradition and even those with enough money for rings still used twine. 

“Yeah, she insisted he wasn’t filling our milk bottles to the top.”  Peeta cleared his throat as Katniss kissed his shoulder, then his chin, next his cheek. They hadn’t slept together since she’s been back. Peeta was letting Katniss make the first move. 

“It sounds like something your mom would do,” she stared deep into his eyes as she sat astride him.  She leaned forward to kiss him.

“You sure?” 

“Peeta it’s been twelve months, fourteen days, and who knows how many hours since I’ve last had you touch me….” 

Peeta was astonished she had kept count. However every thought went out of his mind and other more pressing matters took precedence.

Time had a way of marching by quickly.  Katniss patiently dealt with their daughters' tantrums, and at night she would lie in his arms wanting for Mel to accept her. He was in the bakery when he overheard  Rye snicker. “My brother is a doormat and he doesn’t realize what a little slut you are. What did you have to do to get us that contract?”

“I would never cheat on your brother.” 

“Didn’t you?” Rye sneered. “Kids know when people are fake or liars. You only have to look at Mel to know she sees right through you.”

Peeta walked through the door and saw Katniss scowl, but Peeta could see the slight trembling in her lips , and the way that her face drained of color that meant she was near tears. 

“That’s enough Rye,” Peeta said, standing up to his brother. The last time he’d seen Katniss shrink back was when her father died. 

 In school Peeta had seen how the once vibrant girl diminished not only in personality but in size. She and her sister were so skinny they wore extra clothing to keep warm.  

Peeta had taken it upon himself to give the girl he loved extra food at lunch time.  He would sit next to her and say he was full, offering her an apple, or half a sandwich. One time he had left her family a basket of bread. His mother was furious that he took it without permission, but it was worth it seeing Prim’s face of joy upon discovering the bread. Peeta swore Katniss saw him hiding in the dim morning light. 

Shortly after that she began hunting and going around trading the meat she caught. Meat was expensive in the district and Katniss’ fresh game was welcome. It was this trading that afforded Peeta the ability to walk up to her in highschool and offer the bond of friendship.  It’s how they got to this moment. 

“I’m going to go hunting,” Katniss whispered. 

Peeta let her go before rounding on his brother. “Don’t you ever say anything like that to her. She worked in the kitchens while in the Capitol. Her supervisor Paylor, tasted the bread she brought with her. She gave dad Paylor’s number.”

Rye angrily turned his face away. 

“No, you’re going to listen to me, Rye. Katniss and I wrote to one another at least three times a week. She worked and studied hard. You know how shy she is around people. For her to make acquaintances in the Capitol was hard for her. She spent most of her nights studying, and when she wasn’t studying she was working. She asked about our daughter in every letter. Does that sound like a girl who is out for herself? She came back with ways to help both of our families.”

“What about Mel?”

“Mel thinks Katniss is going to take her daddy away. Yesterday she told Katniss, dada mine.  Mel has to learn how to share.” Peeta ran his hands through his hair.

“Mel’s stubborn.”

“Just like her mother. She’s also jealous just like Katniss.”

“Mitsy,” Rye and Peeta blurted at the same time and both of them laughed remembering the girl Katniss threatened to shoot in the eye while she was pregnant. 

“Just yesterday Mitsy came in to purchase bread and Katniss gave her a look that would freeze the lake in the woods.”

“There’s a lake in the woods?” 

Peeta grinned at the memories of them frolicing in the lake. The skinny dipping episode made Mel, “Oh there’s a lake in the woods.”  

   “Huh,” Rye said.

“Just give Katniss a break. She’s trying real hard to fit in again.”

“Alright fine,” Rye said. 

Peeta rubbed his face as Rye walked away. He needed to get all of his ducks in a row, now if he could only wrangle his toddler. 

Two weeks later he dragged himself upstairs. His father and mother left for the Capitol for two weeks. Rye was also gone on a singles train tour around the districts. Peeta was left to run the bakery by himself. He was tired and cranky like Mel when she refused to take her nap.

Tonight he kept the bakery open an  hour extra for a particular bride and her groom. Josi Raisin made him jump through hoops tonight. She was getting married to Jensen the newest Mine Manager and she was picky about the flavor of her cake.  She tried their vanilla, their lemon, the apple spice, lavender, poppy seed, pecan, raspberry, carrot, vanilla almond, and their most expensive, the german chocolate cake, only to choose a plain sponge cake.

The peal of Mel’s laughter stopped him dead in his tracks. 

“Again mama,” Mel shouted excitedly. 

Peeta quickly went up the stairs, he found Mel sprawled on the floor with Katniss giving their daughter raspberry kisses on her tummy. Mel laughter’s filled his ears and Katniss' brilliant smile gave his stomach butterflies. 

“Look, it’s dada.”

“Dada,” Mel said running to him. She patted his tummy then said, “Mama, mama…” followed by a gurgle of words. 

Katniss walked up to him and smiled, hugging them both. “It seems that a little patience, a lullaby and belly raspberries is what it takes to win her over.” 

“Well, I can’t comment on the belly raspberries, but  your voice is what made me fall in love with you.” 

Katniss smiled as Mel rested her head on her shoulder.

Mel then said, “My mama.”

Katniss grinned then said, “Yes baby girl I’m your mama.”

Mel then turned to Peeta and said, “My papa.”

“Yes button I’m your papa.”

Mel then patted them both on the cheek and gave them kisses. 

Peeta’s heart burst, filled with happiness.  He  hugged his girls and sighed, this was the dream. 

The end

[winryofresembool]

Things We Lost in the Fire, ch 23

aka Caleo uni au

Fic summary: Calypso starts studying at a new university, but to her annoyance her new flatmate is a loud mouthed mechanic who also likes to sneak his dog in whenever. But as she learns to know him better, she realizes they might have more in common than what she first thought. Eventually, even the darkest secrets come out…

Chapter summary: Halloween chapter, part 1.

A/N: This is the first part of possibly a long-ish Halloween 'arc' that is to come. I have to warn you that I only have 1 more chapter as a draft version and the said chapter is a mess and has caused me a lot of insecurities so... I'm not entirely sure how long it will take me to work through the issues that chapter has. I still hope I will have something to post next Friday! Please be patient with me, I promise I have every intention to continue and finish this story.

Thanks for all the lovely comments the previous chapter got! You guys are the best :) And keep them coming because that is literally the best reward I can get :)

Words: 3200+

Genre: romance & hurt/comfort

Warnings: none

previous chapter / AO3

...

“Hey Sunshine, you ready?” Leo asked her flatmate one November Friday as he was pulling his winter coat on in the hallway.

“In a minute!” Calypso yelled from her room. “Just… One final touch up!”

Leo checked his watch. “Okay, as long as it’s really a minute! You know Argo II isn’t waiting!”

“You do know that Argo II doesn’t have feelings, right? It’s a car,” his non-understanding flatmate argued.

“You better hope he didn’t hear that!” Leo protested. “He may just not turn on at all if you claim such things.”

“Oh my gods, Leo. Sometimes I wonder if you care about your machines more than people.”

Leo didn’t respond to that. To himself he mumbled. “At least I know how to fix them. And can’t hurt them.”

The flatmates were getting ready to leave for Jason and Piper’s late Halloween party. Most of the members of their friend group had been busy doing their own things on the real Halloween weekend but they had decided that they’d still want to have a small gathering at Jason and Piper’s house on a later date. Percy and Annabeth would be there, as well as Jason’s sister Thalia, her ‘friend’ Reyna, and Jason’s friend and a distant relative Nico. To Calypso Leo had told, that he had only met Nico a couple of times, because apparently Nico was a bit of a lonely soul and he wandered around the country doing who knows what. That fall, though, he had apparently met someone who had managed to keep him rooted to his home, so Leo suspected that there was a possibility that Nico really would show up this time.

Leo snapped out of his thoughts when Calypso’s door was pulled open, revealing the girl in her costume. His mouth opened involuntarily as he took her in. She was wearing a white chiton like dress with golden decorations around the neckline and accessories that matched the theme. Those included a golden headband and a belt, a bracelet made of real flowers, strappy leather sandals and since her own hair was short now, she had gotten a caramel colored wig that she had braided to one side, reminding Leo a lot of the hairstyle Calypso had had when she had moved in. She smiled at Leo shyly. “Well, what do you think?” She asked, lifting the hem of her dress slightly to show it off better.

“You’re… you’re…” Leo felt the words escape him again. With frustration he wondered how one person could do that to him. Leo Valdez never ran out of words.

“Calypso?” she tried to guess what he had wanted to say.

‘What?” He asked with confusion, unable to follow Calypso’s track of thoughts. In his mind he had answered her question ‘prettier than greek goddesses’ but he realized too late that she had meant that she was dressed up like the Calypso from the Greek mythology. “Oh, now I got it. Must have sniffed too much machine oil or something…Anyway, I see you have some self irony, dressing as your name sake.”

“That was kind of the point, Valdez. A girl named Calypso who studies Greek mythology? People comment on my name so often that I decided it’s time to make it clear that yes, I’m aware of that coincidence.”

“Ooh, the great revenge,” Leo chuckled. Suddenly he noticed that Calypso had turned more serious, her hands fiddling with her purse.

“Really, though, what do you think of this? I made this dress and these bracelets myself. And my mum gave me this before we moved here,” she pointed at her headband. “Apparently it’s something that’s been running in our family; my grandma wore it in her wedding picture and so on…”

“Oh… Well… that’s cool,” Leo said, mentally cursing the ‘error’ message on his brain. “You did a good job. I mean… I once saw a painting of Calypso in the Indianapolis Museum of Art and I think you look nothing like her… in a good way!”

“Aww, thank you.” Calypso seemed happily surprised about Leo’s comment, and he swore the expression made her even cuter. He also wondered if he should have a doctor check his heart because it seemed to do funny things in her presence...

“You’re welcome?” he replied stupidly.

“So, where is your costume?” Calypso asked curiously, apparently only now paying attention to the fact that he indeed wasn’t wearing one yet. “I thought you said we’re in a hurry.”

“I can’t drive in mine, it’s difficult to see from under it,” Leo explained, returning to his room to get a huge sports bag where he had packed his creation a bit earlier. He had spent several days making it and he was kind of proud of the final result. Although, seeing Calypso now, for a moment he still wondered if he had made a mistake with his costume choice, but it was too late to change his mind now. “I’ll put it on when we get there.” He gestured towards the bag.

“Okay,” Calypso nodded while changing her shoes into more fall suitable ones. “I’m looking forward to seeing what you have come up with.”

“Good, because it will blow your mind,” Leo claimed.

“I will refrain from forming any opinions before I see it,” Calypso noted, putting her keys into her pocket. “Now, come on, mister Mysterious, I hear Argo II isn’t very patient.”

Leo secretly loved it when Calypso attempted to joke back, and he grinned at her as he held the door open so she could leave first.

“Let’s go then, Sunshine.”

…

The drive to Jason and Piper took about 20 minutes so Leo and Calypso had a lot of time to talk about whatever came to their minds. At first Calypso gave Leo pretty short answers and he got worried that something was wrong between them again, but eventually Leo got her curious about the guests at the party that she hadn’t met yet.

“The Hunters are traveling a lot because of their competitions so I haven’t met Thalia that often. She’s a little bit scary, though. She has this edgy look going on and I’ve heard she is super strong; she’d ninja throw me on the floor before I’d have time to say Festus if given a chance. I’m trying very hard not to give her any reasons to do that.”

“Ouch. She sounds like something else,” Calypso said.

“She is,” Leo confirmed, almost getting chills only thinking about her. “She can be nice if you get to her good side, though.”

“Is it just me or does someone have a crush?” Calypso asked teasingly.

“What? No!” Leo exclaimed, glancing at Calypso’s reaction briefly. “Alright, maybe I used to have but that was when I didn’t know what was the best for me. But that was a long time ago. Besides, she’s totally dating someone even though they won’t admit it.” ‘And I wish I was dating someone else as well’, he thought, but left that unsaid.

“Oh? Will I get to meet that person today?” Calypso asked with curiosity.

“I think you will. From what I know Reyna’s always with Thalia. They claim they are only best friends but Jason has told me that they are keeping a low profile because it’s forbidden inside their team to date their teammates.”

“That sounds like a basis for a tragic love story,” Calypso said while staring out of the window with a dreamy expression. “I don’t even know these people but as a hopeless romantic I hope they will find some solution.”

Leo thought Calypso was very cute when she talked like that “Yeah. I hope.”

“So, do you know this Reyna personally?” she asked then, distracting Leo from his thoughts.

“You could say that,” Leo answered, trying to focus on the road instead of the girl next to him. “The team visits Waystation regularly because Jo and Emmie used to coach them back in the day and as a fellow Spanish speaker Reyna has always paid special attention to me. I swear, sometimes she treats me like I was his little brother…”

“Aww, that’s kind of sweet in my opinion. What is this team you were talking about, though? Did you say Hunters?”

“Oh, yep. The Artemis’ Hunters, named after the Greek goddess Artemis, naturally. It’s an archery group… Hey, is everything alright?”

Leo couldn’t help but notice that Calypso had shifted uncomfortably on her seat and adjusted her seatbelt a bit looser around her shoulder when he had said the name.

“Yeah. Don’t worry. I just… used to know someone who was in the Hunters as well, so I was surprised they have some connections here, that’s all.” Calypso turned her head to stare out of the window, sending Leo signals that he should drop the topic. He decided to push it a little bit further, though.

“You did? But you said ‘was’. Is she not in it anymore?”

“No,” Calypso shook her head, but didn’t elaborate.

“OK.” Leo sighed. A few moments earlier Calypso had been smiling and teasing him about some old crush and now she was acting cold again. Clearly the Hunters were a painful topic for her, but Leo couldn’t figure out why. Had something happened to the person Calypso had known? And why did she have to be so secretive? Leo wanted so badly to be able to help her and understand her, but when she was not opening up, it was very hard to do anything about it.

“Any guesses about what my costume may be?” He decided to change the topic. That seemed to cheer his flatmate up a bit.

Calypso closed her eyes while thinking, a tiny smile forming on her face. “Hmmm, I imagine it’s probably something flashy. But knowing you it could also be your work coveralls and working boots. I know how much you love those, after all.”

“It’s flashy, alright,” Leo said, his grin returning back to his face. “I’ll give you another hint: it’s a character from one of my favorite TV shows or movies.”

“You have a lot of those,” Calypso reminded him. “Ooh, now I know!! You’re Dalek! That’s why you would have a hard time seeing from under the costume.”

“No,” Leo shook his head, “But now that you say that, that would’ve been cool! Why didn’t you give me that idea earlier?”

“Because you already had an awesome idea? Or that’s at least the impression I got,” Calypso reminded him.

“Well, yeah. I still like my current idea. Maybe next time I’ll make a Dalek.” Leo had a goofy smile on his face as he imagined building a Dalek costume from the scratch.

“Sounds like a plan. So, will you reveal to me what you will be this time?” Calypso asked.

“Nah, you’ll see soon. Good things are worth waiting for, right?”

“Yeah, I guess so.” Calypso shrugged. “Although our opinions on what’s good tend to differ a bit based on our previous TV watching experiences.”

“Yeah, but that’s why it’s good we are flatmates. It’s good to broaden your horizons sometimes and learn about different things that other people like,” Leo pointed out.

“Maybe you’re right,” Calypso admitted. “But are you saying you have learned something from me? What could that be?”

“That olives taste bad? That sometimes Venusaur can be more useful than Charizard?”

“Not exactly what I was looking for, but I’ll take that.” Leo turned his head just enough to see a small smirk on Calypso’s face.

“I was just messing with you because I think you secretly like it,” Leo said with a grin. “But really, you have taught me a lot. That we shouldn’t let fears control the direction of our life. That Greek mythology is actually pretty fascinating even if tía Callida made it sound boring as hell, and we should all learn to understand different cultures better. And, you know? There’s no way we can know every single thing about someone else so we just need to learn to trust and give them a benefit of the doubt sometimes. And finally, I shouldn’t underestimate your Mario Kart skills.”

Calypso snorted at the last part. “Sometimes you do surprise me, Repair Boy. That was a good answer.”

“I can feel my reputation as the Bad Boy Supreme getting shattered to pieces. What about me, though? Have I taught you something?” Leo asked. If he was honest to himself, he didn’t want to know because what could he possibly teach to a smart girl like her?

“You taught me that chilis are evil and you should never eat them the way I did,” Calypso replied, and Leo was fully prepared for more teasing. But it never came.

“You have also shown me sometimes persistency can be a very good thing – otherwise we probably wouldn’t be friends now. We also shouldn’t judge a book by the cover – I’m just saying that when I first saw you I was kind of prejudiced… but since learning to know you better I realized I was wrong. And remember that time when Jo and Georgina were visiting us and you came home a bit late? Jo told me some stories about you before you arrived and that made me understand how far hard work can sometimes take us. You’ve come a long way… and while there are always things we can work on and improve, I think it’s important to be proud of the things we have already achieved, even when looking ahead.”

“Wow… those are some really nice things you just said there…” Leo stumbled to find the right words. Especially the last point had hit him hard because he had had a very hard time with his self esteem recently. He still didn’t know if he would be allowed to retake his lab test – and more importantly, if he was even capable of trying. That was just the tip of the iceberg; it definitely wouldn’t be the only time he would have to face his fear during his studies and later on in the work life, and he would eventually have to make the difficult decision whether it was worth going through. He did want to get over his fear, but with her own issues on her mind, he hadn’t wanted to ask her to help until the situation was better.

“Hey,” Calypso squeezed his knee gently and Leo was afraid he’d accidentally brake so fast they’d crash somewhere. Thankfully he managed to contain himself. “I know I nag and tease you sometimes, but I hope you know despite that I actually care about you and respect you for the things you do. I’m… glad you’re my flatmate.”

Leo was very thankful that it was dark in the car because he was positive that he was redder than a chili pepper. After swallowing hard, he managed to croak: “Yeah. Thanks. You’re pretty neat too.” “Pretty neat?” Calypso asked, cocking her eyebrow.

“Argh, sorry, you can’t expect a guy to be able to think straight after you tell them something like that!” Leo exclaimed. “But, uh, I mean, I think the same way. That it’s nice that you’re my flatmate.”

“Glad we have that established.” Calypso smiled at him. Again Leo wondered what it was about that smile that made his heart go crazy. He had had a couple of short term girlfriends before Calypso had moved in and even though he had liked them, there was something different about how Calypso made him feel. But now that Leo thought about it, he realized that for example Khione, his first girlfriend (who had turned out to be quite an ice queen in the end) had had a smile that had never quite reached her eyes and made him wonder what was truly going on in that head of hers. His second girlfriend, Echo, had been a sweet girl but something about her smile had said that she’d rather be free of relationship bonds. Leo thought that he had probably sensed that from pretty early on because it had been a smaller shock for him than his first break up. But Calypso’s smile? It made Leo want to see it over and over again, and instead of wanting something from him, it seemed to give him more energy. It made him feel restless, but in a positive way.

When Leo snapped out of his thoughts, he realized that Calypso was staring at him weirdly, as if he had been in his daze for a while.

“What?” he asked a bit nervously.

“You just completely missed my question,” Calypso stated, frowning a little.

Leo tried to shake his head to clear his mind a bit. “Sorry, I was just… remembering something. But what did you ask?”

“I asked if there’s any news from your professors about your studies. It’s been a while since you’ve said anything about that.”

Leo gulped. “Yeah. Right. Um, at the moment I’m continuing to attend the classes except the lab one. I guess I should ask the lab professor if he would still let me redo the test at some point. But the other problem is, I’m not sure if I can. You know, if I have it in me to get over my stupid fear.”

“It is not a stupid fear, Leo. You have your reasons. But I do believe that you can get over it. And I want to help you. We should start working on it soon, how about tomorrow or some time next week?”

“Tomorrow is fine to me.” Leo started tapping his fingers against the wheel, a sign of him feeling anxious about the topic. “I… really appreciate your help. Is there something I can do in return?”

“You already did!” Calypso said to his surprise.

“Huh? What do you mean?”

“Remember that flower shop you mentioned to me?” Calypso asked. “I guess I’ve been so busy this week that I forgot to mention this but it looks like I’m getting the job! The interview went well and the boss invited me to see how they make their flower arrangements and they even let me do this.” Calypso showed him her flower bracelet that had some small roses and several other flowers the names of which he didn’t know. “She will make her final decision on Monday but I might start working there already next week.”

“That’s awesome news! Congrats!” Leo said, genuinely happy for her.

“Thank you! And sorry I didn’t tell you earlier, it seems we have both been rather busy this week, I feel I’ve barely seen you…”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m glad I was useful for something! But look, that’s Jason and Piper’s place.” He nodded towards the building in front of them.

Leo looked from the corner of his eyes how Calypso would react to seeing the house. From what he knew Calypso hadn’t been there earlier; she and Piper had hung out more at their flat due to the closeness of the university. He wasn’t disappointed when he saw Calypso’s mouth open a bit.

“I know, pretty impressive.” Leo said.

“I have seen big houses before but this looks way nicer than the ones I know…” Calypso noted. Leo wanted to ask more about that but he knew that the friends were waiting so he decided to leave it for later. Once he had parked the car, some strange instinct told him to rest his hand on hers for a moment before he gestured to Calypso to step outside.

“After you.”

[centuryofdean]

Of Food and Comfort - Part 12

Author Note:: You guys, this is the last part! I honestly do not feel 100% great about it, as if I could have ended it better but unsure how. I still hope everyone enjoys it! There is something else in the works now that I am excited to start sharing soon!

Here shortly I am going to take a small hiatus. I need to finish my Hobbit story (it has been neglected too long), and once it is finished I want to get back more into Marvel. I will be working in the background, but not posting until I have gotten everything else squared away. In the meantime, please tag me in Marvel stories you think I would enjoy! I want to read more fanfics and support writers on Tumblr, so I will be sharing more works as well.

Author Disclaimer:: Marvel and its characters are not mine. I take no credit. Instead I claim the maybe not so great plot, writing and characteristics of the reader insert character. I am not a die hard Marvel fan, I haven’t read all the comics, but have watched the movies. I may get some things wrong, so please don’t hate me. I also have been incorporating Old Norse as terms of endearment.

Summary:: You worked for Tony Stark as a…mechanic of sorts. Anything around the Avengers compound that needed a technicians touch, you handled. With working and living there, you had grown to be friendly with the super heroes. Of course you had grown to have feelings for one of them. The muscled Thunder God to be exact.

Rated:: M for Mature. Please do not read this story unless you are 18+. Smut. NSFW

Pairing:: Thor x Reader

He looked different. The usually shiny bright warm blonde locks you loved running through your fingers was longer, darker and tangled together in messy strands and braids. It was the longest you had ever seen it, coming down just past his shoulders. Some of it was still bundled in braids behind his head. His beard was completely dark, and also very long. It came down past his neck and onto his chest in more intricate braiding. The new look, although a little ragged and dirty, was something you found you liked.  

Everything else about him screamed different. It appeared he was dressed in oddly dirty large Earth clothing.

The only concerning thing you did notice was the once bright mirthful ice blue eyes were now dull dark blue like a stormy sky. One was even noticeably darker than the other, oddly…perfect? Now, these new hopeless eyes were starring right back at you.

Even with noticing all these things, you couldn’t help to feel significantly happier. The past months seemed to slowly fade into a blurry bad dream you had woke from. The ache didn’t matter anymore, what mattered is that he was back—home.

Steve had jumped to action, reaching down to pick up the broken mug at your feet and trying to hush Mjölnir who was still growling from the floor a little ways off.

The tremble started in your jaw before the tears. In one swift movement you were posed on your feet, mouth opening to say anything and everything all at once.

“Thor,” another feminine voice called out from the hallway, “I can’t find the bathroom. You said it was at the end of the hall?”

The happy warmth that had just filled you moments ago disappeared with such quickness you were convinced someone doused you in ice water. Your skin prickled with the change, eyes turning to take in the woman, the same woman you passed in the hallway on your way to the kitchen.

Without conscious thought, or ever seeing her before today—you knew who she was—she looked just as you envisioned. Taller, thinner, big eyes and plush lips with flawless skin and sleek brunette hair.

Jane Foster looked as you imagined. Though standing in your kitchen talking to Thor with ease is not what you visualized.

Your hands were shaking as they grasped the island, holding on for dear life when Steve’s head popped up with his stance.

“Steve Rogers,” he offered quickly, making his way around the island to meet Jane. “Let me show you where the bathroom is ma’am.”

The look of awe covered Jane’s face as she smiled awkwardly. Steve started to lead her from the room, but then popped back in a moment later, “If you need anything sweetheart, I’ll be in the living room.”

Just like that you were alone with this new Thor, just a handful of feet away from each other and awkwardly starring at one another.

He didn’t look excited to see you; he didn’t look even remotely happy. Instead he looked upset and forlorn. Why would he be happy to see you, not when he had Jane back? Why else would she be here, with him?

For five months you sat on this base, mourning him every single day—trying to remember the love you shared so that it would get you by until he returned. He finally returned and now you are trying to remember if the love was ever real.

Unconsciously you grasped at the collar of your shirt, checking to make sure the necklace he had given you was hidden underneath the fabric. You had worn the keepsake every day, wearing it even when you showered. It wasn’t uncommon for you to play with it throughout the day either. At this moment you didn’t want him to see it. For some reason it felt as if it were a weakness for him to see you cling to it so tightly.

The only conclusion you could reach was that you were a stand in for Jane. Everything had been a lie, especially when Thor had told you that he no longer cared for Jane in that way, he only cared for you, only loved you. It was confusing, because Thor never lied, but how could you believe it when it looked like he had been back on Earth for more than a few days and came back with Jane in tow?

You tried to picture how your reunion with Thor would be when he returned. You would throw yourself into his arms and tell him you missed and loved him very much. You would tell him that you didn’t care about how upset you would be separated from your friends and family—you would gladly move to Asgard because you couldn’t go without him like that again.

This isn’t what you pictured; heartbroken sitting across from him and rethinking everything that had happened within the past year.

“What happened?” The words came so softly from your lips, you coughed to clear your throat and croaked them louder when he didn’t reply.

Thor’s eyes fluttered close, hands coming up to cover his face while he took a deep breath.

As he spoke, more tears fell from your cheeks. The deep timber that you thought you forgotten brought back a rush of emotions, goosebumps crashing to the surface of your skin. His voice was just as deep as before, but full of defeat. It was like listening to an old sad country song you hadn’t heard since you were younger.

Once he returned to Asgard, he was immediately needed across the realms to fight another battle. Once one battle was over, he needed to go to another. It was as if wars were breaking out all around him. He was trying to prevent the downfall of the realms and Ragnarök.

Eventually he found himself imprisoned by a fire demon. He defeated the demon and returned to Asgard to find Heimdall missing and Loki posing as their father and leading the kingdom.

Forcing Loki to help, they left Asgard and found their father in Norway. Odin revealed that the brothers actually had a sister; one Odin locked away for becoming too powerful and using her powers wrongly. He was dying, and once he passed their sister Hela would be released from her prisons. Even though Thor fought hard to prevent Ragnarök, it was going to happen, and Odin wanted New Asgard to be in Norway on Earth because he thought it was beautiful.

It happened so fast. Odin passed on, and Hela appearing in his place almost. The Bifrost opened, leading Thor and Loki back to Asgard—but Hela followed.

The story began to become garbled as he spoke, almost as if he were grasping to remember the finer details himself in his grief and the order that they happened.

Hela destroyed Asgard’s armies. Thor’s friends were killed at her hand—and she had plans to destroy and conquer the rest of the realms.

Somehow in all this Thor and Loki found themselves separated, Thor on a ship and crashing on another planet. After emerging from his ship, he was captured and taken to the leader to be used as fighting entertainment. Not surprisingly Loki was there becoming good friends with the leader while pretending not to know Thor.

“Mjölnir was left behind on the ship,” he sighed. At his words, the dog perked up a bit, tilting his head in confusion on why a stranger was saying its name. “After I had freed myself and a few others from the fighting games, I was unable to get back to the ship I arrived on and retrieve it. I had tried summoning it, but it never returned.”

Since you needed to know the rest of the story, you kept silent. After he finished telling you what happened, then you would tell him you had the hammer.

The ship Thor found himself on with the other imprisoned fighters was intercepted by another ship. One that housed a talking furry animal named Rocket and a talking tree named Groot?

Thor admitted early on in his retelling of the past five months, that he lost track of days after his father passed away. So, when he and his other escaped friends were taken in by Rocket and Groot, he said he wasn’t sure if it had been months or years when that he had been gone. Time always traveled differently in space. If you didn’t pay attention to how many times you fell asleep and woke up, it was hard to keep track. The time with their new friends blended together so much and went on so long he had felt as if he would never return to Earth.

Thor described his time on Rocket’s ship as endless. They hardly ever stopped anywhere because their food supplies never seemed to deplete. He had vocalized that he was needed back to Asgard to defend it from Hela, even though it was so long ago. Before he could go back, he had needed a weapon since Mjölnir had been left behind.

The new group found themselves at a forge in space, getting assistance from a welding dwarf to create Thor a new weapon, one strong enough to defeat his sister since he sensed she was stronger than even him.

As he was talking about it, he lifted the large axe from the floor for you to see. It reminded you a lot of the hammer but had a wooden handle instead of a metal one. The handle looked like it was just chopped from a tree and slapped together. The carvings etched in it screamed familiarity, though were completely different than the ones on Mjölnir.

It was named Stormbreaker.

Your fingers traced the sleek metal of the weapon, eyes drinking in everything about it while Thor continued to speak.

He explained that their travels back to Asgard were just if the travels to the forge seemed. He still was unsure of how much time had passed.

After they arrived on Asgard, everything happened quickly. They found that Heimdall was trying to help the rest of the Asgardians escape to Norway with the Bifrost. Hela was fighting back, wanting the sword that controlled the Bifrost so she could start her plans to rage war against the rest of the realms.

Thor jumped in the thick of it, battling his sister while his friends and Loki were fighting her army of undead. In one particular moment, Hela stabbed Thor in the eye. This action led him to a vision of how to defeat her. Even with Stormbreaker, he was unable to wield the new weapon efficiently to land a deadly blow on her.

Thor told Loki to put a crown on a flame, knowing that this action was going to rebirth the fire demon who imprisoned him and bring on Ragnarök—bringing the downfall of Asgard.

As the demon and Hela battled, Thor helped Heimdall usher the surviving Asgardians through the Bifrost and to Norway, where Odin said New Asgard should be.

At those last words Thor said, you sat starring at the countertop, trying to take it all in. It sounded like a lot. He must be heartbroken over losing his father and his home. You found it unsurprising he was gone for five months and unable to get back—but was he gone for five months? He probably has been on Earth longer than a few days, especially if Jane Foster was with him.

“When did you get back to Earth,” your voice tried to break as you asked.

Thor coughed to clear his own throat, eyes latching onto Mjölnir the dog at your feet. You looked as well, to try and see what he was seeing. One very large black dog with thick fur, barring his teeth slightly towards Thor and a soft rumble.

That a boy, you thought, smiling softly. Protect your Momma.

“Ten days ago,” Thor said softly. “We arrived to Norway ten days ago.”

Thor had been on Earth for ten days. Clearly, he sought out Jane, why else would she be with him? The realization ate away at your chest, leaving you in pain and short of breath. So why were they here? All he really had here were clothes, clothes he could easily get anywhere else. He did have some belongings, but they were things you had given him.

A pair of sunglasses that were big enough to fit his head and cover half of his face for example. He found them amusing. You had bought him a handful of books about Asgard, and together you both read them (even the children’s books) and discussed what was fact and what was fiction. There were a few Nordic bracelets and clothing, maybe even some beads and hair ties you had gotten for his hair when he braided it.

Everything he had that wasn’t clothing, you had given to him. Thor didn’t keep materialistic things on Earth, because Earth was never really his home. All the thoughtful and meaningful items were in his room in Asgard. He had shown you’re his room once when you were there. It was decorated and personalized. Paintings of his family hung on the walls, old weapons or toys from his childhood. He even had a few Poptart wrappers hidden under his bed.

All of that was gone now. It burned with the rest of Asgard when the fire demon destroyed itself and Hela.

“I have something of yours,” you whispered, finally rising from the stool you sat on. You could give him one last thing that he hadn’t completely lost at least. Without having to ask, Thor trailed behind you as you lead the way back through the hallways towards his room. When you both passed the door to your old room, you took made a mental note to start moving your things back in there as soon as he and Jane left.

Thor made a weird grunting noise but didn’t say anything as he followed. Mjölnir put much needed space between Thor and you. As you both reached his room, you took one more deep breath before pushing forward.

Ever since you moved into it, it had been a state of mess. Dirty clothes littered the floor—well the clean ones did too. You were only able to tell what was clean by sniffing them. Mjölnir’s dog bed sat on the farthest edge of the room, covered in dog hair. Again, everything was covered in dog hair from the clothes on the floor to the sheets and blanket on the bed. Hell, even some dog hair was on the clothes you were wearing and surely in your hair.

You couldn’t help but think that this is what depression looks like.

The hammer was leaning against the vanity dresser you had brought into the room the first week you moved in. It hurt to look at all the photos of you and Thor when you walked towards it.

As your fingers touched the leather on the handle, goosebumps trickled across your arms and chest. This was the first time you touched it since bringing it home. Although you never said anything to the others, it scared you slightly with how you called the power of electricity and thunder like Thor would have. You weren’t Asgardian, you weren’t a God—you were lucky it didn’t kill you.

The hammer swung up with your arm as you presented it to him.

His eyes grew wide, a soft smile hinting at the corners of his mouth.

“Mjölnir,” he exclaimed excitedly.

The sight caused your heart to snag and pull. The last time you had seen that beautiful smile was just before he left. Just before the both of you had gone to bed that night, you found yourself settled on his chest, starring down at him while you both talked about anything and everything. You told him you loved him—and that’s when his face lit up brightly with excitement and joy.

At that moment the dog was on the bed, watching quietly until he heard his name. A sharp bark met the air, causing you to snap out of the trance you slipped into watching Thor smile.

Once he took the hammer off your hands, you stepped over to the bed and sat next to your dog, hugging him tight.

“How,” Thor asked confused.

“A month after you left Tony let me get a dog,” you started, taking a deep breath. You didn’t want to talk forever, you wanted to say as little as possible and leave. Running your fingers through Mjölnir’s thick fur helped you stay grounded. “I went to the park with him one day and he got loose. I called for him over and over again. The hammer showed up just before he did.”

Thor closed his eyes and gripped the handle on the hammer tightly. Then, he quickly turned and started to take in the room. Before he arrived, this room became part of your comfort. Now you were embarrassed that he was here witnessing your distress over him, especially since he moved on.

“You named the dog after the hammer,” he said quietly. “You moved into my room. You wear my clothes… You did not—you did not move on with Steve?”

“What,” you asked sharply, a little confused. “Move on with Steve?”

Thor sat the hammer on the floor, soon settling onto the ground with it. Now that he was in front of you without an island separating you, you could see he had gotten bigger—he wasn’t just wearing baggy clothes.

“When I arrived,” he said. “the Captain was not happy to see me. Your room was empty. He had your tea prepared for you and—and he called you—”

Thor stopped talking suddenly, hands clenching into fists on the tops of his knees. At a loss, you starred back at him. Was he getting jealous that Steve called you sweetheart?

Finally a little fed up with it all, you wanted to explode. You wanted to yell and scream and tell him to take his girlfriend and get the Hell out—but it was Thor. Even if you were heartbroken, you couldn’t ever treat Thor like that; you still loved him.

“I cried—I cried every damn day since you left,” you started off softly. With each of your words, your voice and anger showed itself. “Every. Single. Day. When that fucking hammer came back and you didn’t follow; I thought you were dead. I mourned you Thor! I still tried to hold out hope you were alive and would return. For five months, I never stopped missing you. Steve has been a great friend to me, keeping me company and making sure I’m okay—but only as a friend.”

The waterworks started when you told him you thought he was dead, and they didn’t stop. The dog had gotten up and off the bed when you started yelling about mourning Thor. Mjölnir hid in the closet and whined softly.

“Here I was, for five months, waiting for you to come back! And when you got back, you came back with Jane Foster,” you bit out scathingly.

Those are the words that broke Thor from his silence. He jumped up off the floor and stood before you with heat in his eyes.

“Jane brought me here because I asked her to, I didn’t know how to come back to you,” he hurried out. “I would have returned the moment I came back to Earth, but my people needed me. They needed a leader to talk to the Midgardians in Norway to gain assistance to build and regrow. Jane showed up four days ago. She sought me out when her science things told her the Bifrost opened for a long period of time. I did not seek her out schat.”

Even as the said the word, a broken sob left you. It had been so long since you heard it, you never realized you craved to hear him say it again. He had once told you it meant you were a very rare and good person. Even if it was a compliment that could be given to just anyone, he never used the word for anyone else but you.

He stood. You sat. Both still starring, both with tears in each other’s eyes.

“You weren’t happy to see me,” you cried out, hugging yourself from the bed while you tried to wrap your head around it all. Was it true? Thor had never been one to lie, but you couldn’t help but hesitate to believe him.

Suddenly Thor’s shoulders hunched in on themselves while he ducked his head.

“When I first arrived, I went straight to your rooms to find them empty. Then when you woke and came to the kitchens…I assumed you moved on with Captain Rogers. Seeing your beauty again reminded me that I am unworthy of your affection even if you had not moved on—even after I was gone for so long,” he said quietly.  

It was like everything he said was confusing you. Thor sensed your confusion and looked away while gesturing to his middle and grabbing at his hair. “I have grown lethargic and heavy in my time on ships,” he muttered.

A sudden laugh ripped from your chest, a little hysterical in the mist of it all. Thor was implying that he had gotten fat and unappealing? You gestured to everything in the room and then enthusiastically to yourself. The last time you got on the scale a few months ago, you discovered that all the depressed eating had caused you to gain twenty-five pounds. You could notice it when you looked in the mirror. Your clothes were a little tight, so you wore Thor’s clothes more than your own. Self consciously it bothered you some, but not enough to actually care. The only thing you truly cared about was his absence.

Finally, you grasped at your hair that hadn’t been brushed in days. “I’m a mess Thor,” you cried softly. “I have been since you left! Do you see the room? It’s a pig sty. I can’t remember the last time I put on real clothes, I have left the base six times! Not to mention I haven’t stopped eating to fill the void, and I got fat—”

“You are a Goddess,” Thor’s deep voice commanded through the room loudly cutting you off. “You look more radiant now than the last time I saw you.”

The tears that had started to slowly wane suddenly burst forth again, eyes and face hurting from all the energy that went into crying. Being overwhelmed by everything wasn’t helping, by the fact that Thor was here, and he didn’t love Jane. He still loved you then?

He at last approached you, touching your shoulder softly and hushing you. “Please do not cry drottning,” he murmured. “We are together again. I have missed you.”

Without hesitation you crushed yourself into his front, hugging yourself to him as tightly as you could. This only caused you to cry harder. Getting tears and eventually mucus all over his already dirty sweater. It was worth it when his arms came around your shoulders to hold you closer to him.

It was odd, being pressed up against soft giving flesh instead of hard muscles you were used to as you leaned into his hug more. Other than the first note of the difference since the last time he hugged you, you felt completely at ease. This is where you were meant to be, where you craved to be for months. The warmth from him seeping into you. Soon your tears stopped to small hiccups, and you held him closely as you breathed slowly.

“You probably want to shower,” you said pulling away, fingers playing with the ends of his tangled hair, taking in the state of his clothes and feeling the grime in his hair.

“Will you be alright,” he asked, fingers coming up to tilt your chin up to meet his gaze. The first blush you felt in a long time dusted your cheeks at the action.

“Yes,” you breathed out. “I’ll be fine. We can talk more later. I really need for us to talk more later actually.”

He looked a little uneasy as you said this, arm wrapping around your middle again to urge you closer to him.

“Don’t worry,” you smiled softly. “I just what to know more about what happened…and more about Jane showing up. Trust me, I believe what you’re saying but I just feel like we should visit that conversation again. Is that okay?”

“Anything you want to ease your troubles,” he murmured, pressing his lips to your forehead quickly.

After you pulled away, you didn’t attempt to kiss him. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to, but that you felt that there was too much going on in your head to try and deal with the next emotional hurdle. Thor didn’t attempt to kiss you either, which you were thankful for.

“I’ll bring you some clean clothes in a second and set them by bathroom door,” you told him. “Are you hungry?”

Thor paused by the door to the bathroom, looking at his hands on the knob before answering, “That would be nice, I have not eaten today yet.”

You left to go look for clothes for Thor. Thankfully Tony Stark thinks of everything. In the training rooms on the ground floor you found all sorts of workout clothing from shorts, sweats, shirts and sweaters in various sizes. Tony usually kept it stocked in case new recruits were coming into train or simply if someone needed something to change into real quick and didn’t bring anything.

Not sure what size to grab, you selected a couple of different sizes in different styles for Thor to choose from before trekking back upstairs to drop them off to him.

Mjölnir was jumping excitedly and whining the whole trip. The poor dog probably really needed to relieve his bladder and you had stopped his whole morning routine when Thor appeared in front of you.

When you finally made it to the living room, you found Steve sitting across from Jane on separate couches and talking softly. “I’m going to make some breakfast,” you said after making an entrance. “Are either of you hungry?”

Steve smiled up at you and then glanced at Mjölnir, who was almost whimpering. “That would be great Y/N, thank you. Do you want me to take Mew-Mew out,” he asked.

At the word out Mjölnir completely flipped sideways in excitement.

“Please,” you replied in gratitude. “I would appreciate that.”

“Come on boy,” Steve clapped, “let’s go water the flowers.”

Just before you left for the kitchen, you turned to Jane. “You can come with to the kitchen if you want,” you offered, “or you could watch some TV. Not sure where the remote is.”

You were surprised when she smiled and got up to follow you.

It was a little awkward at first. You went about grabbing all the dishes and ingredients you would need to make breakfast while Jane sat silently at the island. Every once in a while, you would get and eyeful of her. She was dressed in jeans and a soft looking knit sweater, her hair clean and brushed with minimal makeup. All the while you were barefoot, in just an oversized Thor shirt and underwear. Messy hair and lack of shower aside, you felt a little gross in comparison to her.

“Sorry that I’m still in my jim-jams. We don’t get a lot of company in the living quarters,” you called out over your shoulder.

Jane laughed lightly, “You’re fine. This is your house, I’m sorry for showing up unannounced.”

A soft smile quirked your lips at her words, at least she was polite.

“Do you have a preference for breakfast? I was planning on making waffles with fruit, sausages and biscuits and gravy—but if you want something else, I can see what we have,” you asked her after putting some more mixing bowls on the counter-top.

“Oh! Thank you,” she said surprised. “I could go for waffles and fruit, that sounds wonderful.”

The conversation died out a little after that, which wasn’t the worst thing. Even if you held no ill feelings for Jane—because why on Earth would you—she still made you feel a little uncomfortable. Did Thor tell her about you, or did Steve?

Soon Steve let Mjölnir into the kitchen before disappearing. The dog was—as always—excited to see you. While he danced around you and tried to get pets, you would nudge him away with your hips because your hands were full of food or ingredients. “Go lay down,” you said with a laugh, “you will get your breakfast after we eat.”

Dejectedly, he walked off to the corner of the kitchen where he slid to the floor and rested his head on his paws.

“It’s really hard to hate you,” Jane said suddenly.

After throwing the biscuits in the oven, you turned to her somewhat shocked. You liked to think of yourself as a blunt person, but Jane seemed to take the cake and then some on the subject.

“Erm, I’ll take it as a compliment,” you asked confused.

“I just mean,” she sighed, playing with her cuticles on her fingers. “That—I—I ended things with Thor a while ago, because I couldn’t handle him being gone all the time. I knew eventually he would want me to move to Asgard with him, and my life was here on Earth. When I noticed the Bifrost open for more than a few minutes I knew something was wrong and flew to Norway without thinking about it.”

Trying not to be rude, you continued to prepare breakfast, but showed her you were listening to what she was saying but nodding and saying ‘okay’ softly.

“That told me I wasn’t over him,” Jane said with a broken laugh. “Who drops what they’re doing and flies across the world for their ex-boyfriend? He was really surprised to see me, and I tried to tell him I missed him—and all he said was that he needed to get back to you.

“I wanted to be jealous, to dislike you just for the fact that he was coming home to you. I was sure that the moment I walked in with him you were going to dislike me too—but, here you are, cooking me breakfast without a care in the world and being a genuinely nice person.”

Knowing that Thor just wanted to get back to you made you feel a little at ease again. The words tried to mold in your mouth before you said them. “Thor told me why you broke up with him,” you said. “I don’t dislike you Jane; you did nothing wrong to Thor. You were honest with him about your feelings and ended things, a very hard but mature decision. Unless you do something to hurt him or hurt our relationship, I have no problem with you at all. You seem like a good person, so I don’t see you doing either of those things.”

Soon she changed the subject and was telling you about some of the research she did. A lot of it was a little lost on you with her technical terms and some of the Astrology. You were more in tune with mechanics so some of what she was saying was familiar, at least with the machinery she uses. In turn you told her of some of the work that you did for Tony. It wasn’t as prestigious as the kind of science she was doing, but you enjoyed doing it.

Most of the food was done when Thor and Steve returned.

Thor looked much better than before. His hair was clean and brushed smooth, pulled into a bun at the base of his skull like normal. The beard that adorned his face was completely different than what you were used to. Simple braids pulled the beard together and down his neck.

Without thinking, you started to put a few waffles on a plate and placed it in front of where he sat at the island and then slid the bowl of mixed fruit to him. In return you received a small smile and nod of thanks from him. Soon he started to repeat his story about Asgard and traveling with his new companions to Steve and Jane.

Eventually his story melted into the here and now, discussing what they had accomplished so far in New Asgard and what, yet they still needed to do. Thor then started to lose enthusiasm for what he was saying, his words getting quieter and forlorn.

“When I return,” he sighed, “I must go trade with the people of Norway to acquire more food and supplies for Asgard. I only was able to break away after there was enough for a few days.”

That means he needs to go back soon. Maybe in a day or so it seemed. Dread started to fill you again at the thought, he only just came back to you—

“When do we need to leave,” you asked, pushing your half-eaten plate away.

“You will come with me,” he asked quietly. Thor’s hands had risen to rest on top of one another on the counter, fingers clenched together tightly.

“Of course,” you said easily, anxiety rushing through your veins at the thought of being without him again. “I’m sure if we ask Tony, we could borrow a quin-jet to get there faster. I don’t own a lot of stuff to pack so if I start now, I could get everything together by the end of the day. Just my clothes and some odds and ends, the furniture is Tony’s anyway. Whatever I can’t take right away I can come back for in a few weeks. We could leave tomorrow morning—”

“You want to move your things there,” Thor asked with surprise lacing his tone.

You had already gotten up and was bending over to lay a plate of food on the floor for the dog. Mjölnir bound over happily to start licking at the sausage gravy.

“Yeah,” you sighed standing back up. You had already committed yourself to moving to Asgard with him, what was the difference to moving to Norway to be with him. At least you would be on the same planet and could still call your parents. “I’ll need to notify Tony that I’m going to have to stop working for him, but I think—”

“You will leave here and come live with me in New Asgard,” Thor interrupted you again.

A little laugh escaped you at his antics. Although you were still an emotional wreck, you wanted to do everything you could to give your relationship with him a fighting chance. “Yes Thor,” you said. “If that is where you need to be, then I’m going to be there too.”

Thor’s arm slipped behind your back and pulled you down to settle across his lap. Warmth seeped into you from all around, his arms coming to squeeze you tightly to him. “You do not realize how happy this makes me schat,” he murmured. “I did not want to leave you again.”

 It happened pretty fast after that. Tony and you had a long conversation about your work. When Thor had disappeared your work around the base decreased by half, so you felt bad when Tony was trying to offer you a severance pay for leaving. That is what took up most of the conversation at least—you fighting on taking the money. Other than that, you packed up all of your clothes and the little odds and ends you had collected over the years.

Even though you had said that you and Thor could leave that next morning, Thor insisted that you have another day to see the rest of your friends and bid them goodbyes. Not all of them were around much anymore, having moved out or going on more and more missions. With every teary hug and promises to call often, you reminded yourself that you would come visit and they could come visit you.

It wasn’t out in space, just over the ocean in Norway.

Tony graciously gave you a quin-jet and spent a handful of hours going over the controls and logistics of flying it. Since you refused to take a severance pay, he strong armed you into accepting the ship instead. All he had to do was tell you that it could be used to fly back over to New York in just a handful of hours; and you caved.

It took a little enticing with lunch meat to get Mjölnir to get on the jet. Once on it and you started up the engines, the dog howled in fear and cowered on the floor shaking. Thor held the dog close for the long four-hour flight it took to get to Norway.

He guided you from the co-pilot chair the entire trip, murmuring suggestions on how to handle the ship and directions. After landing, he slowly stood with the large dog in his arms as if Mjölnir weighed nothing and helping the dog to the floor gently.

The cool air touched your skin as soon as he opened the doors and lowered the ramp. It wasn’t as hot as it was in New York, but a nice spring-like warmth. The view took your breath away.

Bright green hills and cliffs lined the shoreline, making the ideal image of a small quaint fishing town. There were a handful of houses that had been built while some were still half built. Some older buildings were already established, but people were milling in and out of them with tools and cleaning supplies. Down the shoreline you found a handful of men and women tossing nets into the water and pulling them back in rhythmically.

Thor walked to the end of the ramp, looking back at you and offering his hand. “Come schat, let me show you our new home,” he said smiling.

Mjölnir barked, taking off down the ramp in excitement to get off the ship.

Suddenly you felt a little weightless. Maybe it was a giant combination of the weight of everything falling off your shoulders at once, the beauty of New Asgard, Thor finally here with you—offering you a new life with him.

The previous night you both stayed cuddling in bed whispering back and forth—the talk you wanted to have about what happened when he was gone. There were some more tears as you explained how heartbroken you were to see Jane there, that he was gone and how you were extremely happy to be home and so overwhelmed. Thor answered all your questions about his time gone and his thoughts on Jane. After the talk you felt more assured in his feelings for you, and lack of romantic feelings for Jane.

You were still a little overwhelmed, but as you slid your hand into his and took the first few steps off the jet—every breath you took was fresh and exhilarating. All while leading you, he pointed to some buildings and explained what he had planned for them. Numerous Asgardians waved in hello when you both passed.

After a time of walking he stopped in front of a white house with a lot of windows. It rose up slightly higher than the rest of the houses on a smaller hill, one large window facing the water. It looked partially finished. There was no roof, but different patched colored tarps covering the top.

“Some of the people of Norway offered to help build with us. The wood and materials that they gave us—we were unaware how to construct with it,” he said. “This…this in our home. It is not finished, but—”

“It’s perfect,” you interrupted him, smiling brightly. “It’s so beautiful here.”

“No drottning, it is perfect now that you and Mjölnir are here with me,” he murmured pulling you close. The words caused you to smile and run your fingers through Mjölnir‘s fur. Thor had grown to care for the dog as much as you had, it warmed you to know he was accepting of your fur baby.

“You never told me what drottning means,” you said teasingly he gazed down at you.

Thor laughed and pressed a kiss to your forehead. “It is a term of endearment; it translates roughly to ‘my queen’.”

“And schat,” you asked more breathless than anything.

“My treasure,” he murmured before pressing a quick kiss to your lips. “Come, I want to show you the view of the water from our home. We can make it our bedroom if you want.”

Previous Chapter << Part 11: French Toast

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[oh-obrien]

Inscrutable {4}

Inscrutable: Impossible to Understand or Interpret 

Masterlist 

Relationships: Stiles Stilinski x Original Female Character

Word Count: 6,224 6,737

Warnings: None

Author’s Note: Part Four!!! Uhh lots of angst and a lot about Finley’s past. Also Scott makes an appearance. 

THIS PART OF INSCRUTABLE HAS BEEN UPDATED WITH MORE CONTENT AND HAS ALSO BEEN EDITED MORE THROUGHLY!

Finley woke up when she felt a body shift underneath her, a small groan slipping past the lips of whoever she had been sleeping on. Whoever she had been sleeping on? Finally, remembering what had happened with Stiles, Finley let out a small gasp and sat up, smacking her knee on the wall in the process.

“Fuck!”

“Oh God are you okay?”

Their voices came out at the same time and Finley sighed, leaning her head against the cool wall of her room. Stiles’ body had felt incredibly warm against her, and while the cool wall helped calm her nerves, she wanted to curl back up on him and fall asleep again “What time is it?” She cleared her throat and tried to find her glasses. She didn’t remember taking them off.

“Like two-thirty?” Stiles squinted as his phone screen lit up, “here,” he handed her the glasses she had been looking for. “You know I haven’t seen you with them before today, yesterday, whatever you want to call it,” he pointed out.

Finley thumbed at a smudge on the lenses and sighed. Her eyesight had been the one werewolf perk she had missed out on. Her dad had passed it off as a human gene she had gotten form her mother somewhere along the way and took Finley to an optometrist when she had been complaining of blurry vision at a young age. “I wear contacts usually,” she yawned, her nose crinkling up while she did. She watched Stiles sink back into the pillows while she climbed over him and off the bed. She quietly shuffled her way across her room to unplug her lights, making sure she set the plug down carefully on the floor.

“Well, they suit you,” Stiles mumbled, staring up at the ceiling while he rubbed at his eyes before yawning. Finley smiled and ran her fingers along the arm of her glasses, a feeling of happiness bubbling up inside her with his words.

Finley turned off the TV also and let the soft glow of the streetlight outside her window guide her back to her bed. “Are you feeling any better?” Stiles asked.

Finley sat at the edge of her bed letting out a yawn herself, “yeah. I’m- I’m sorry about that,” she whispered. “I uhh-” she trailed off, “I’m not usually like that,” she settled on. She looked over to Stiles whose eyes were trained on her figure. Even in the dark she could see him rather clearly, and she knew he had his eyes on her.

“Well, it’s okay to y’know. Have emotions,” he spoke into the darkness of the room. Finley scoffed at his response and closed her eyes, she still felt physically exhausted, and mentally drained. “I was just trying to help,” he added. Finley pulled her socks off and paired them together, putting them on her desk. “And it’s too late for me to leave now,” he added.

Finley sighed and pushed off her bed again. “I’ll take the floor, you can take the bed,” she said walking over to her closet to get an extra blanket.

“Or-” Stiles sat up, “you can come lay here again because I think the whole physical contact thing was really helping both of us sleep better, and all my friends back home know I’m a very touchy person,” he cocked his head to the side.

“But-”

“Lydia wouldn’t care and I’m planning on breaking up with her when she visits anyway,” Stiles ran a hand over his face and rubbed at the stubble on his chin, he had really just said that Finley wasn’t dreaming. “Now that that’s on the table, come lay down.” Stiles didn’t leave much room for Finley to argue, and quite frankly, she wasn’t complaining about that. Finley dropped the extra blanket in her hands and sighed, walking back to her bed, and crawling over Stiles to settle where she had been sleeping earlier.

Stiles watched as Finley climbed back into her bed while he adjusted the pillows so they both had plenty of room. She pulled her glasses off and reached over him to settle them on the dresser next to his phone and their half-eaten food. She let out a small sigh while she settled down next to him. “Before it just, kind of happened, I’ve never like,” she stuttered out.

“Here,” Stiles knew what she had been trying to say and laid down flat, straightening his arm out along the pillows and pulling Finley closer. He felt her head come to rest on his chest and his arm curled around her back, rubbing circles into her side over her shirt.    

She let out a shaky breath and Stiles watched her eyes slip closed while she rested her hand flat on his abdomen. “Thank you, Stiles,” she spoke quietly.

“You have nothing to thank me for,” he replied before closing his eyes.

✧༝┉┉┉┉┉˚*❋ ❋ ❋*˚┉┉┉┉┉༝✧

Finley paced the tiled floors of her dad’s office, her claws digging into her palms and the heel of her Under Armor sneakers squeaking whenever she turned on her left foot. Maxwell sat quietly behind his desk, watching his daughter’s movements, and waiting for her to settle down. Neither party was unfamiliar with this course of actions, and both knew they just had to wait out Finley’s pacing while her brain processed her thoughts. “I don’t understand it dad!” She turned around to face her father, finally sinking into the leather chair that faced his large oakwood desk. She held her palms out and noticed that they were bleeding. Back to old, and bad, habits. Finley rested her palms up on her dad’s desk to show him the already healing cuts.

“What don’t you understand, Finley?” He asked while handing her a small towel. Maxwell and Finley had always been close, Finley had been a typical ‘daddy’s girl’, and once they started working together, they only grew closer. Taking a deep breath and watching her claws retract Finley looked up to her father. “Your eyes are still red, dear,” the statement dripped with sarcasm.

“Yeah, and I’m still full of pent-up anxiety,” she retorted, closing her eyes. When she opened them, she looked in the mirror next to her dad’s desk to see them back to their normal blue. Maxwell laughed lightly while he watched his daughter wipe the blood off her hands off, the claw marks already healed fully and her skin showing no sign that the marks were ever there.

“I can smell it,” he laughed lightly.

“Thanks dad,” Finley glared at him, “but to answer your question, I don’t understand anything right now,” she ran her fingers through her hair, wavy from the tight braids she had in it the night before. She hadn’t wanted to confront Stiles after they woke up that morning and had spent extra time in the bathroom taking her braids out.

Maxwell let out a long sigh while he stood up, walking over to his bookshelf lined wall, running his fingers over the spines of the books, obviously looking for a specific one. He ran his fingers over several incredibly old looking books before his fingers settled on one that was entirely black. Finley watched him wrap her fingers around the top of the book before he pulled it out. “Here,” he set it down on his desk and flipped it open, some dust flying off the pages while he flipped through. “Read it.” He turned the book around to face his daughter. The text had been printed in Latin, but luckily for Finley, her dad had subjected the twins to hours upon hours of Latin lessons when they were younger. Something about being ‘connected with family roots’ and learning Latin being a ‘rite of passage’ in their family.

Finley saw the word at the top of the page, ‘Mates’, printed in the fanciest script she had ever seen. “Nope!” She told her dad, pushing the book back. “Let’s show you all that money you spent on foreign language classes for me, and Cian paid off. Non, Nein, Net, Ne, and again, No.”

“Finley Louella!” Maxwell raised his voice and Finley simply sat back, flashing her red eyes at her father, testing him to actually try and tell her what to do. “I keep forgetting that doesn’t work on you anymore,” he let out a long sigh. “Just please consider it, you know your brother and Clara are-”

“Okay and Cian is the perfect son! Finley replied, “he’s not testy, he listens to whatever you say, he can live in the same house as the rest of the pack, and on top of it he’s planning on getting engaged this year for God’s sake!” She stood you and started pacing the room again, the periodic squeaking from her sneaker filling the room again. “I just! I don’t have a mate, dad! I’m not- I’m not that kind of person.” She looked out the window and noticed how rain still fell outside. If she got lucky practice would be cancelled and she could wallow in her own anxiety and pity for the rest of the day after work.

  Maxwell laughed lightly and closed the book, pushing it to the end of his desk. “You know, your mom was a human too, Finley,” he said quietly. “And I met her my sophomore year of high school, I just felt inexplicably drawn to her.”

“I’ve heard the story before dad,” Finley grumbled and glanced at her parent’s wedding photo that sat on her father’s desk. “I just, I don’t think there’s always a mate made for everyone,” she sighed. Maxwell let out a long sigh of his own, opting to give the topic up for the time being, instead he turned to the files on his desk.

“On another topic,” Maxwell thought shifting to something else may make his daughter happier, “I don’t want to say you’re right,” her dad turned a thick file towards her, the folder open, pictures of a green-ish, wrinkled figure with pointed teeth inside.

“It was a Djinn!” Finley grabbed the file and picked up the pictures. “I had been saying that for months!” She smiled and flipped through the pictures, each one confirming the suspicions she had for months more and more. She closed the folder and noticed the word ‘closed’ stamped across the folder in red ink.

Maxwell watched his daughter’s face drop and sighed, so much for that attempt at cheering her up. “Finely,” he started, “I- you know we couldn’t wait to act on this case.” He told her. Maxwell looked up and offered his daughter an apologetic smile, noticing the disappointment spreading across her face. “We couldn’t wait for you to be able to go back out to Nevada to finish the case and-”

“And this- this right here,” she threw the file on to her dad’s desk. “This is why I didn’t want to go to college!” Finley knew she acted unreasonably on occasion, but it truly had been the only way she could get her feelings across for years now.

Maxwell stood up, and flashed his fangs at his daughter, his look telling her that she should check her tone. It being the only show of power he really had left against his daughter. Early on Maxwell’s family, as well as his late wife’s, had informed the couple that Finley would, with no doubt, eventually present as a True Alpha. The couple had brushed it off for years, just contributing Finley’s actions and mood to her ‘strong willed’ personality type. However, when his daughter had eventually presented as a True Alpha, a couple months short of the twin’s seventeenth birthday, there had been a rift that formed in the family.

Maxwell belonged to his parents’ pack, with his mother being known as one of the most powerful Alphas east of the Rocky Mountains. Maxwell’s wife had taken the bite shortly before they were married, and with luck they had a set of twins, both who proved to be werewolves themselves. Finley had taken on the role of ‘the boss’ in the pack’s home almost as soon as she could speak and eventually all the other children who lived in the house found their place behind her.

Maxwell and his mother had sat down with Finley after her thirteenth birthday and had described in detail the power and responsibility that would come with being an Alpha. Finley had brushed the conversation off at the time, informing her father and grandmother that she ‘didn’t have it in her’ to kill someone else to take their Alpha status and she also decided that True Alphas were too rare for her to become one. She hadn’t considered that her grandmother, eventually, wanted to pass her power down to Finley.

Once she had presented as a True Alpha upon returning home from a particularly dangerous undercover job that her father had allowed her to take the reins on; a rift quickly started to form in the Mannulv Pack’s home. There had been a fight for power between Finley and her grandmother which had resulted in Finley moving into the guest cabin for most of her senior year of high school, deciding it would be the healthiest option for the entire pack.

After Cian had gotten into a fight with his father and one of his uncles about the mistreatment of his sister he decided to announce once they both finished college, he would be joining Finley’s pack with Clara. Splitting a pack obviously hadn’t been Finley’s intention. However, with her grandmother’s temper being so volatile there wasn’t another option. The Mannulv Pack simply couldn’t have two Alpha’s living in the same household without it ending in both verbal and physical fights.

“Finley you know it wasn’t about you being in college,” Maxwell sighed looking at his daughter, who eagerly waited to interject her opinion.

Finley sunk back down into her chair and opted to rip apart the towel her father had given her with her claws instead of ripping up her palms again. “Okay fine, but you could have at least told me after you had closed the case instead of waiting,” she opened the folder and looked for the date it had been closed, “a week and a half for me to find out myself.”

“And you should be more concerned about your education for now,” Maxwell held up a finger to keep his daughter from cutting him off. “But I think the whole mate thing has you a little bit on edge right now. I know you don’t like talking to your grandmother-” Maxwell watched Finley’s lip curl at the mention of her. “If you give me a minute,” he laughed, “I was going to suggest lunch with your uncle.”

“I have like, four uncles on your side, that’s helpful,” Finley gave Maxwell a deadpan look.

“Your uncle Cayden,” Maxwell watched his daughter’s face peak with interest. “And he suggested Quarry House.”

Finley closed the file and shoved it across her father’s desk. “Okay, why are we still sitting here?” She grabbed her dad’s car keys off the ring by his office’s door and threw them to him. “And don’t give me the ‘I’m working’, crap. It’s Saturday you most definitely are working on your own time right now so let’s go!” Maxwell laughed and caught the keys to his own Range Rover, picking up his jacket and following Finley out of his office.

✧༝┉┉┉┉┉˚*❋ ❋ ❋*˚┉┉┉┉┉༝✧

Stiles sat at his desk, a container of food from one of the on-campus dining locations in front of him, and a pencil in his free hand. He had been trying to finish his homework for his statistics class but couldn’t seem to focus on much of anything. Instead, he found himself typing out a message to Scott, asking if his best friend had time to video chat. Not even a minute later Stiles watched as a Skype call from Scott started coming through his laptop.

Feeling a smile pull at his lips, Stiles slid his pencil behind his ear and answered the call. “Hey!” Scott’s face was entirely too close to the screen and Stiles laughed hearing Malia tell him to ‘move back dumbass’ in the background. “Ahh the lady is over, hey Mal!” Stiles spoke while Scott moved back from his computer. Scott sat cross-legged on his bed, looking exhausted but still content, but girls seemed to have that effect on the True Alpha. A dopey smile pulled at his lips and his hair sat tousled on top of his head.

“Full moon was last night, man,” Scott shrugged, “gotta take the energy out somehow.” Stiles fake gagged and he heard Malia laugh loudly from somewhere in Scott’s room.

Stiles shoved another bite of food into his mouth, “I don’t need to know any more about your sex life than I already do,” he mumbled through the food. “That goes for you too, Malia!”

Scott sank back into his pillow and ran his hand over the stubble covering his chin with a guilty smile. “Speaking of sex lives,” Malia climbed into bed with Scott and sat halfway on his lap. She clearly had one of his t-shirts and the couple looked like they had woken up not too long ago. As much as Stiles had loved the time he had been in a relationship with Malia, he was more than glad she and Scott could make each other happy now. “Scott said you were staying with some girl last night,” she raised one of her eyebrows.

“Scott!” Stiles groaned and the werewolf in question just raised his hands in surrender. Letting out a long sigh Stiles set his plastic fork down and picked up his water bottle. “First,” he turned his head, so it appeared as if he faced Malia, “we did not have sex. Second I’m still in a relationship with Lydia-”

“Who you’re planning on breaking up with when me and her come to visit,” Scott cut him off.

Stiles waved his hand to dismiss Scott’s comment. Stiles knew he planned to break up with Lydia soon, and he knew most of his friends knew that already because Scott can’t keep his mouth shut. In his mind though, it still felt wrong to talk about.

Lydia had been his dream girl since third grade, and after the events with the Ghost Riders, he felt more than lucky to have finally gotten to call her his girlfriend. However, the charm of their relationship had worn off quite quickly. Sure, the sex had been great and so had their friendship beforehand, but they were just too intellectually similar to have a stable and long-lasting relationship together.  Stiles knew breaking up with her would be the best decision for them both in the long run, but he still dreaded it.

“Yes, thank you for reminding me Scott,” he sighed. “Can I continue with my train of thought now?” Stiles watched Malia slap a hand over Scott’s mouth and Scott must have licked her hand because she pulled it away and wiped her palm on his cheek. “Ew,” Stiles mumbled.

Scott and Malia both turned back to the computer with guilty smiles. “Sorry, Stiles,” Scott gave his best ‘puppy-dog-pout’, probably hoping that it could somehow get Stiles to ignore his and Malia’s flirting. “You know how it can be sometimes,” he added. Stiles felt a small pull in his chest, but nodded, nonetheless.

“I get it, no worries,” Stiles hoped Scott couldn’t pick up on how upset he felt though the computer. “But yeah, I went over to her dorm, err suite, to work on that project for intro to law,” he held up the folder full of documents he had printed. “And I felt terrible from lacrosse, because they show no mercy here apparently,” he saw Scott crack a smile, “yeah, yeah. Not all of us magically heal!”

Scott started to laugh, and Malia kicked him in the shin. “Jerk, listen to Stiles,” she mumbled.

“Thank you, Malia,” Stiles spoke. “Anyway, she insisted it would be fine if we didn’t work on it, she showed me how amazing a heating pad can be for sore muscles, and then we ordered dinner. Somewhere after that I found out she looks just like her mom, and apparently it’s normal to keep booze in your dorm?” That last part came out as more of a question. “Uhh she’s hot, like H-O-T, hot, found out she’s never had a boyfriend, somehow.  She actually got ditched by the guy she was into at prom for his ex-”

“What an asshole,” Scott interjected. Scott who seemed amused by Stiles’ rambling, and he would let Stiles ramble as long as he needed to if it would help him work out his feelings for this new girl he had found. Although Stiles lived across the country now, he still held his place as a member in Scott’s pack. And as an Alpha, Scott felt partly responsible for the happiness of his packmates.

Stiles nodded, “right?” He ran his hands through his hair and leaned back more in his desk chair. “But then she kinda had a little emotional meltdown and I offered physical comfort, then she wound up dozing off and I felt bad waking her up to leave and I fell asleep too. Somewhere around two-thirty we woke up, I admitted I planned on breaking up with Lydia, she got a little skittish and then we fell asleep again.” Stiles let out a long breath of air from his nose after he finished speaking.  Scott took a moment to process all of what Stiles had just said and looked over at Malia, seeing if she wanted to speak first.

Scott closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose before speaking, knowing he had to speak first. “And you feel this strong for this girl after only a week of knowing her?” Scott asked. He knew there were hook-ups that happened in college, but this, this wasn’t just a hook-up. Scott knew Stiles well enough to understand that much.

“Finley,” Stiles started with. “Her name’s Finley, but yeah. I just feel so drawn to her and I can’t pinpoint why I do.” Stiles knew something just felt right with Finley, he knew it the moment he had sat next to her in class, but he couldn’t figure out the why. Not knowing the why had been driving him crazy since Monday. Stiles didn’t like not knowing the ‘why’ in life. Finley was attractive, that couldn’t be disputed, but it wasn’t just her looks that had Stiles absolutely enthralled with her. When they were together it just felt right, the type of right he can’t explain.

  Malia looked at Scott and took her opportunity to speak, “sometimes you just know when you meet the right person,” she shrugged. “And no one’s denying you that, Stiles,” she looked at Scott who had hooked his chin over her shoulder. “But you haven’t even broken up with Lydia yet. You don’t know how you’re going to feel after you do.”

“I mean, I agree with her Stiles,” Scott interjected. “I’m going to be there when you do break up with Lydia, but I can’t move into your dorm and stay in D.C. afterwards if you get too sad.” Scott was only partly joking; as closed off and reserved Stiles could be, everyone knew that he when he felt he felt deeply.

Stiles sighed but nodded at the same time. He knew that Malia and Scott were right, but he also knew that he didn’t want to let Finley slip through his fingers when she was currently right in front of him, he’d never let that one go if he lost her so quickly. “All I can promise you two is that I’ll try and move slowly. Okay?” Stiles saw a look of disapproval cross Scott’s face, but he quickly switched the topic.

“So there’s this new beta working at the station and-”

✧༝┉┉┉┉┉˚*❋ ❋ ❋*˚┉┉┉┉┉༝✧

Maxwell and Finley walked into The Quarry House Tavern and saw Maxwell’s youngest brother, Cayden, waiting for them in the overflow area. Cayden stood up with a bright simile and walked over to hug Finley, who enthusiastically returned his embrace. Cayden smelled like the pack house, he smelled like home, he smelled like all the relationships she wanted so desperately to rebuild but knew she couldn’t. He had been the uncle Finley was closest to growing up, while he was so much younger than his other siblings, and still in a different stage in life when the twins were born, it allowed them to form more of a relationship with the youngest of their father’s siblings.

“How’s college going, pup?” Cayden asked Finley once they had been seated.

Finley whined in the back of her throat. “I’m eighteen Cay,” she huffed out, flipping the page on her menu. “M’not a pup anymore. But it’s going fine,” she looked at her uncle over the menu.

Maxwell sat silent while he flipped through his own menu. Cayden raised his eyebrows at his niece before setting down his own menu, “and that’s why you smell like a boy?” He asked suspiciously.

“Dad!

“I took you here to talk to Cayden, Finley,” Maxwell still didn’t look up from his menu. “And I hope you’ll do so.” Finley took a deep breath and willed herself to keep her emotions in-check, especially the day after the full moon. She always felt extra emotional in the two days leading up to and after the full moon, and sometimes she found herself acting on feelings she knew she shouldn’t, whether it be with compassion or anger.

Cayden thanked their waiter who set down glasses of water in front of the trio, all three of them putting their orders in also. Finley made sure to order something large and messy so she would be able to limit her time speaking. “So?” Cayden asked again. “Your dad said something about you having met your mate?”

Finley looked at Maxwell and flashed him her fangs as best she could in a public space, assuring him they would be having words on the way back to his office. “I mean,” she shrugged looking at her uncle, “I honestly don’t believe in the whole, mates thing.” She offered her somewhat honest opinion.

“So, you don’t think what your brother and Clara has is genuine?”

“Well, I do, but-”

“Me and your aunt Gina?”

“That’s different, and-

“Your dad and your mom?” Finley felt her breath catch in her throat when her uncle mentioned her parent’s relationship. She also noted the uptick in her father’s heartbeat and the frown his face pulled into. Even with her mom having passed away well over ten years prior, it still tended to be a sore spot for the family; everyone knew not to bring her up unless she needed to be mentions in a conversation. Cayden, of all people, knew that the most; so, Finley recognized that her uncle wasn’t using her mother against her, but was using her to help Finley open her eyes.

Finley pulled her bottom lip between her teeth while Cayden took a sip of his water, trying not to lash out at him for mentioning her mom when she knew his intentions were pure. “You really can’t compare all of those relationships to my situation,” Finley mumbled, drumming her fingers on the table.

Cayden shrugged, “why not? All those relationships are ones where the pairs are mates. Where, at one point, both parties were almost complete strangers who just felt so drawn to the other. There had been no other word able to describe their connection.” Finley knew the story of mates.

Mates were two halves of a soul, separated by the Gods when the souls were given physical bodies to live within. Both halves spent their entire lives looking for the other, and once a soul found their other half they could never again be separated unless death forced them to part. Nearly everyone in the Mannulv pack had found their mate, their pack had been known for their success in finding their mates to the rest of the were-world. The pack had also grown at an exponential rate since most of the children were deemed old enough to officially marry their mate and make them an official member of the pack.

Finley would be the last cousin in her generation to find their mate. However, finding her mate meant that she would also be the first not to make her mate a member of the esteemed Mannulv pack. “I don’t-” Finley closed her eyes. “I just really don’t deserve to have a mate, and they don’t deserve to be dragged into my mess,” she mumbled. “My mate would deserve a stable pack to lean on, not, my mess. I uhh, actually plan to tell Cian he’s no longer welcome to join my pack with Clara,” she told Maxwell and her uncle. “Joining grandma’s pack is safer, it’s guaranteed stability.”

“Finley,” Maxwell said quietly. He hadn’t realized his daughter had been struggling so much with her family issues. He knew she had struggled in the past, but he didn’t realize that it still weighed so heavily on her conscious. Heavily enough to make the decision that years down the line her brother wouldn’t be welcome in her own pack.

“Stiles,” Finley said quietly so her uncle could hear. “His name is Stiles, and his best friend is Scott McCall, he already has a pack, he might be human but that’s his pack,” she saw her uncle look at her dad. “We,” she paused and took a deep breath, “Grandma has humans in her pack, and you see how connected they get,’ Maxwell looked at his brother to make sure he had also picked up on Finley’s slip of her tongue before he looked back to his daughter. “And I’m not planning on breaking up another pack because I couldn’t keep my attitude in-check when I was younger.”

Finley saw Cayden’s eyes soften and he reached out to grab his niece’s hand across the table, but she quickly pulled her hand away. “Finley, you can’t believe what your grandmother told you in the middle of a stupid fight,” he sighed. “Sure, you were strong-willed- to say the least when you were younger, but that’s not why you’re a True Alpha,” he told her. Finley knew the story of True Alphas; that they become an Alpha based solely on the strength of their character, their virtue and sheer willpower, but sometimes Finley didn’t feel like she had truly earned the title.

“I never- I never asked for this,” she dropped her cheek into her palm, watching the ice cubes float around her glass of water. “I never asked to be an Alpha. I never asked to,” she choked up a little bit, “to practically get kicked out of my own pack.” Finley sniffled, wiping away a couple of tears that had run down her cheeks. “I- I didn’t do anything to deserve it. I’ve just been myself. I lost my mom and my pack; do you know how many other wolves would be dead by now if they were in my position?”

Finley watched both her father and her uncle’s gazes soften as she used the sleeve of her hoodie to wipe away the rest of her tears. She didn’t like being emotional, she didn’t like to seem weak or easy to rattle in front of other people. However, she knew that the past week had been testing her emotional boundaries, and she had reached the end of her rope. “It hurt, y’know?” She asked the question not expecting or even wanting an answer. “Moving into the guest cabin it- it really stung. I missed out on a lot living out there, and quite frankly it sent me into a spiral I would never wish on anyone,” she spoke quietly but with purpose. “I’d say that was worse than being flat out rejected by the pack. I would have rather been kicked out completely than live a hundred yards away but not be able to see anyone or really go into the main house.”

“Finley-” Maxwell tried to interrupt his daughter, but she just shook her head.  

She swallowed the lump in her throat and forced herself to keep talking, to lay it all out on the table, just like she had wanted to for over a year now. “Werewolves, we need physical comfort from our pack, their scent. You know that right?” Both her father and Cayden nodded. “Think about it, I haven’t had any of that really for more than a year now,” Finley mumbled. “I felt too awkward at Pack dinners because Grandma wouldn’t let me sit at the same table as her, so I just started cooking for myself in the guest cabin. Grandma never really wanted me at movie nights or anything because the pups would feel the tension, so I tried to make myself scarce.”

The year and three months of no true contact from the pack had taken a large toll on Finley. Two weeks into her isolation of sorts, she had developed severe insomnia. After a month she had dropped nearly thirty pounds and felt mentally and emotionally numb. She had missed a rather large chunk of several her cousin’s children growing up, missed out on really being a part of their life like she wanted to be. She missed engagements and pregnancy announcements. At weddings she had been expected to greet guests then sink back into the shadows. To other packs, her presentation as a True Alpha would been seen as a weakening of her grandmother’s power if they ever found out.

Her problems only started to get slightly better after Cian expressed his concern for his twin. He had started to steal pieces of clothing or bedding from the Pack house for Finley to sleep with and started making sure she cooked properly for herself. He would often sneak away on weekends to go for runs with her, help her to still feel somewhat connected to the pack. He spent full moons with his sister rather than the pack.

“No one intended for that to happen Finley. We just didn’t want-”

“Didn’t want to upset everyone in the Pack more than they already were,” she nodded. “I didn’t want to either, like I said. So again, making myself scarce just seemed easier than forming an even larger rift in the family,” she took a deep breath. Finley wiped away more of her tears and nodded, opening the conversation for her father and uncle.

Cayden looked over to Maxwell, but the two brothers couldn’t determine who should speak first through just looking at each other. Instead, Maxwell waved his hand and motioned for Cayden to speak first. “I still don’t understand what all of this has to do with you having found your mate. Shouldn’t that just help you feel better?”

“In theory yes-” Finley started.

“But,” Maxwell cut her off, “if I’m following correctly without a Pack to bring her mate home to, she doesn’t feel worthy of even having a mate since she doesn’t have anyone to show them off to or gain approval in their relationship from.” He looked to his daughter to make sure he followed her correctly. “Especially since he’s a human.”

Finley just nodded as their food got set in front of them, “ding, ding, ding. We have a winner!” She laughed lightly taking a bite of her sandwich. “And before you ask me why I can’t change that it’s natural instincts, werewolves want a pack, I don’t have a pack at a moment really, therefore I feel like a failure,” she put it into simple terms. “Even if I am an Alpha, I’m not really adjusted enough to function on my own yet.”

“So how can we fix the whole, pack animosity issue?” Cayden asked her. “Because that seems like the root of most of the problems you currently have going on.”

Finley took another bite of her sandwich so she would be able to collect her thoughts while she chewed, wondering what news she should break first. “Well, you see. Last night I kind of fucked up,” she trailed off.

“She had a little moment and her mate,” Finley glared at Maxwell after he said that. “Sorry. Stiles wound up offering her physical comfort because he claimed he’s just a touchy person, and he wound up staying the night.” He used the words his daughter had said when she burst into his office at nine that morning.

Finley saw her uncle’s eyes widen and she shook her head and waved her right hand. “No! No! We didn’t fuck,” she closed her eyes and let out a low growl. “We didn’t have sex,” she corrected herself. “He actually admitted that he’s planning on breaking up with his girlfriend in uhh- a week or two.”

“Now she’s more emotionally attached than she would like to be,” Maxwell added. Cayden nodded and shoved a fry into his mouth, clearly thinking.

He nodded slowly, clearly thinking. “What if we,” he motioned between himself and Maxwell, “talked to your grandmother and finally knocked some sense into her?” He asked, watching Finley’s reactions carefully. She seemed to bristle at the mention of her grandmother, her heart rate increasing and her scent giving off anxiety.

“I really don’t have a choice at this point, do I?” Finley knew that her dad and uncle talking to her grandmother would re-open old wounds and would bring to the surface problems long buried. She realized that also meant sitting down and talking with her grandmother at one point in the near future; trying to explain that she didn’t want her grandmother’s power but only wanted to learn how to harness her own power for when the Pack would be transferred to her.

Maxwell sighed and drummed his fingers on the table, clearly thinking about saying something to his daughter that she wouldn’t want to hear. “Finley, you also need to recognize that presenting as a True Alpha automatically means taking your grandmother’s place once she passes, no one else in the pack can take her place now.” Maxwell watched a look of betrayal pass over his daughter’s face while her heart rate exponentially increased. “I’m not saying that to scare you-”

“Then I should have been told that a year ago!” She raised her voice slightly, but promptly dropped it when both men across from her flashed their own fangs. “I’m serious! I would have tried so much harder to maintain a relationship with that old hag if I knew I would be taking over her pack when she bites it!”

Cayden jumped into the conversation again, “no one thought you were ready for that information back then,” he spoke.

“Oh yeah,” Finley laughed, “because I’m so much more ready now after being emotionally beaten down for over a year now?” She shook her head and took a long sip of her water. “I’m shit at math but, that just really doesn’t add up.” She grabbed her phone off the booth from next to her and stood up, pushing away her half-eaten food.

“Finely if you just-”

However, she didn’t let her father finish speaking. “It’s fine, the rain let up. I- I need to go, I’ll call you later just- I need time right now.” She quickly tried to gather her thoughts. “I’ll call you when I’m ready.” With that Finley quickly found herself on the streets of Washington D.C. feeling lost, only knowing one person she wanted to see in that moment.

She found her fingers flying over the keypad on her phone, scrolling through her contacts before she pressed on the name that she had been looking for. Holding her phone up to her ear while she walked, she listened to the dial tone, trying to control her breathing and push off her oncoming panic attack.

“Hey, everything okay?” She heard the voice on the other line pick up.

“No. Stiles, I- I need to talk to you.”

[gray-is-neutral]

Her

part 2

Dr.Wilson: testing, testing. Hello, this is Dr.Miller it is 10:22am, November 30th. State your name.

Cooper Myers: Hello, my name is Cooper Myers and I am 21 years old.

Dr.Wilson: Very good Mr.Myers. Now I am going to ask you some questions, okay?

Cooper Myers: Of course, I love our time together, doc.

Dr.Wilson: what is your relationship with Seth Myers?

Cooper Myers: Isn't it obvious? Hell he's my carbon copy! I'm his big brother!

Dr.Wilson: Alright and your relationship with the Mendozas?

Cooper Myers: I remember them. Indigo and Aster Mendoza. Pretty girls. ... Don't tell Seth I told you, but he has the biggest crush on Indigo. Not that I blame him. She is fiiine.

Dr.Wilson: Then you must know their older brother, Rowen Mendoza?

Cooper Myers: ...

Dr.Wilson: Mr.Myers?

Cooper Myers: ...

Dr.Wilson: Mr.Myers did you know Rowen Mendoza?

Cooper Myers: Did you know that Seth dated Indigo for a while? It was only because I helped him of course.

Dr.Wilson: Why are you telling me this?

Cooper Myers: Who starts a story at the end, Doctor? No you need to understand the beginning to get the middle and the end. May I tell you the story?

Dr.Wilson: What kind of story is it?

Cooper Myers: A love story.

Cooper Myers: Seth has always been shy and sickly, but I'm not. I am strong, and I protect him. He's not a people person. but I am. I help him in the bedroom department, and I make sure he doesn't let himself go. If I don't do it, no one will.

Dr.Wilson: You sound like a good big brother.

Cooper Myers: I am, and you know it's rude to interrupt a story Doctor. Now, where was I?

Cooper Myers: I also help him when his social anxiety starts getting to him. Years of being bullied will do that to you. One night. All he did was talk about her. "Did you see her? Her hair was in braids today; she's so cute," he had said. "Yup, go talk to her," I tried to tell him, and he almost did, but then he got all clammy. He almost passed out!

Dr.Wilson: And what did you do?

Cooper Myers: I called him a pussy, which didn't help any. I don't know why I thought it would.

Dr.Wilson: What happened then?

Cooper Myers: Well, Seth's cute friend, Marcus came over and invited us over to a party at his place. I tried to tell Seth that we should go, but he was tired and when Seth is tired, he's not going anywhere, but towards a black out.

Dr.Wilson: And after you two went home, what did you do?

Cooper Myers: Oh, Seth went straight to bed, but I stayed up. I was so bored. I had my camera, but you can only take so many pictures of the same house plant-you know? And his phone was being blown up. His cute friend wanted to know where he was. If we were coming.

Dr.Wilson: What did you do then?

Cooper Myers: I went. Mom was gone, so I got in our car. I left a note, of course. Not like Seth was going to miss it. I went, and I drank. A lot, and so did Marcus. And we had fun. I almost got Marcus into bed with me, but before we made it to his room, Indigo showed up with Aster and...

Dr.Wilson: Who was with them, Cooper?

Cooper Myers: ... her boyfriend, cheating bastard.

Dr.Wilson: He cheated on her?

Cooper Myers: Yes.

Dr.Wilson: How do you know?

Cooper Myers: I caught him and some girl behind the bushes. I knew Seth would have been pissed, so I drug him over to Indigo, told her what he did and Aster and I continued to beat his ass.

Dr.Wilson: What happened then?

Cooper Myers: She got all upset, which totally killed the mood between Marcus and I, so after she left. I did too.

Dr.Wilson: Did you go home?

Cooper Myers: No...

Dr.Wilson: Where did you go, Cooper?

Cooper Myers: I love photography.

Dr.Wilson: Yes, I've seen your pictures. You're quite talented. Is that what you did Cooper? You went to take pictures?

Cooper Myers: Yes...

Dr.Wilson: Of what?

Cooper Myers: You have to understand, Seth isn't responsible. It was my idea. I didn't see it as wrong. Mom always said if you leave the curtains open, you're giving out an invitation for the world to watch you. She loves the attention. Why else would she wear a crown of roses? She loved all the eyes to be on her...

Dr.Wilson: What did you do?

Cooper Myers: I took pictures for Seth. She was so beautiful, but then...

Dr.Wilson: Then what Cooper?

Cooper Myers: ...no. Stop.

Dr.Wilson: What? Cooper?

Cooper Myers: I said leave her alone. To stop, but he didn't listen.

Dr.Wilson: Who?

Cooper Myers:...

Dr.Wilson: Cooper?

Cooper Myers:...

Dr.Wilson: Who did you try to tell to stop?

Cooper Myers: Her boyfriend. Rowen didn't know what happened at the party and he let him in. He beat her ass, and completely destroyed her room. Rowen soon figured out what was going on and they fought. Her ex boyfriend escaped through the window and ran off. I couldn't let him to that to my brother's girl.

Dr.Wilson: What did you do?

Cooper Myers: I broke my favorite camera for it's lens, and I went after him. He wasn't hard to find. I found him in an old shed. He had no chance. I was going to cut him, but that would leave evidence, so I choked him instead...

Dr.Wilson:...Cooper...

Cooper Myers: I know that you have taught me a lot about right and wrong, but this time I can say that he had it coming. I gave him a chance to say sorry. To turn himself in, but we all make choices Doctor. He made the wrong one.

[dreamy--dolly]

this is it. this is the angst fic i was promising.

taglist: @mordredfuckingpendragon​ @gringolet​ @kouvei-matarra​ @cukibola​

They meet in the hazy heat of summer, when they are both very young. Though the grass is green and birds and insects hum in merry harmony on the breeze, Galahad still can’t take his mind off the scrape that bleeds red on his knee - his mother will tell him that it’s nothing to worry about, because there are people who have gotten hurt worse. So he makes his way deeper in the woods. He knows the way back - just make his way back on the straggly dirt path till the pain fades.

And then there is the boy who he finds on the path, in a blue dress stained with dirt and too-long black hair bound in a braid that’s coming undone. What he notices first about the boy is his eyes: A dark shade of blue, but still soft and sincere. He blinks at Galahad - you look pathetic, he tells himself, crying in front of someone else because Mother says you’re too old to cry - and says nothing about his tear-streaked face and loud sniffling in the quiet of the woods. 

Then he sticks his tongue and and squints, twisting his face and scrunching his eyes shut.

The pain is still there but Galahad laughs, and the boy laughs with him. He does not ask and does not care that the boy wears a dress or that his hair is too long, because surely that does not matter in the end. He just has someone to laugh with in the summer, someone who will let the black-spotted ladybugs crawl up their arms and draw pictures in the dirt with him.

“What’s your name?” he asks the boy, who shuffles his fistful of flowers.

“Percival.”

“That’s a nice name. Percival. ‘M Galahad.”

“I like your name, too.”

The summer heat may make Galahad’s eyelids flicker behind his spectacles, and when he gets home he will have to answer the questions about why his knee is covered in crusted-over blood. But at least he has a friend to explore other worlds with during the summer.

Autumn comes and Percival sees angels - that’s what he tells Galahad at least. They’re climbing trees even though Percival knows he’ll tear up his dress on it (he talks about how sometimes his mother gets visitors and always talks about her “daughters” but when the visitors are gone she talks about him as her son, and he doesn’t know what to make of it.) They spend their days treading the paths of imaginary worlds they can save, kindling their own warmth in the coming bitterness of winter.

“It was at night, and I swore they were angels - just with hidden wings. They rode horses and were so beautiful I wanted to join them. Mother told me I had to go back inside, that they were knights and I didn’t want any business with them.”

Galahad climbs down from the tree. Rough bark scrapes at his hands. Then he reaches the ground and sits cross-legged, staring up at Percival who still struggles to maintain balance. The leaves are afire in red and yellow and brown and cling to his hands and legs from the greasy drizzle that’s got them slicked with rain. 

“Knights?”

“Yes, knights. I don’t understand why that sounds so strange to you.”

“Mother says I have to become a knight like my father did when I get older. And I’ll be off to train in Camelot when winter comes. Which means I won’t get to see you…”

“Unless I become a knight to join you.”

That’s the first time Galahad sees what others might see through the keyhole: Percival whose mother shoves him into dresses and hides him away from a world that may not be as thorny as she makes it out to be - because perhaps there are petals, too. At least that’s what Galahad believes. You just have to snip the thorns away and the flowers won’t prick your fingers. Still, though-

“How? You really think you could do it?”

Percival clasps hold of his hands, blue eyes shining at green. “I can if I try. I promise I will.”

So that is what Galahad chooses to believe. It might be fleeting, but he’ll hold onto it while he can.

“And I’m glad you’ll try. Because if I had to train with anyone else, I’d want it to be you.”

Winter, Galahad decides, is the worst of the four seasons.

At least autumn has a prelude of warm colors before the bitter cold sets in. The snow may sparkle pristine white against the torchlight for a little bit, but after a day or two it all melts away to gray slush. He doesn’t say a word about it, though - at least he’s far away from his mother and the convent, yet there’s still his father Lancelot who seems to be infected by winter’s chill: Though he embraces his son when he sees him there is no warmth or anything Galahad thinks a father should give. The king, however, is different with his ruffling Galahad’s hair and saying how he’s heard about how he’s worked so hard.

And for him there’s something missing, stars melted away from a gray sky.

He never says anything about it, though, because that is what he was taught - if you really want to change, don’t speak with others of the worries that linger in your mind. The beetle and worm find their way into everything eventually, so why bother?

But then winter brings a visitor, who drags himself from the thorny woods through the heavy snow towards Camelot, a visitor who presents himself in the throne room with red dress tattered and dirtied, snow dusting his dark hair. But there is something alight in his eyes and it is what has brought him here in the first place. Galahad thinks it is who he thought it was, but keeps his mouth shut till Kay brings him to see the boy.

When he sees the face he’s kept in his memories, it’s like the snow melts.

Galahad elbows his way past Kay to greet him, and runs to tackle him to the ground in a hug. Here is the boy who has watched seasons fade into one another with him, shared his dreams. And he feels like home.

“I kept my promise,” Percival says.

“And I’m so glad you did.”

Spring brings magic that touches the dead branches of trees and makes the world breathe again. Three years since Percival brought a burst of warmth into winter, and by now the trees are coated with tiny green leaves and the first pale buds of flowers to come. The snow has thawed and the world is perfumed by a balmy, honeyed breeze that smells of fresh earth and new beginnings. Magic, Galahad learns, is something that people are blessed with - the reason he and Percival are at Camelot is because God gave them magic and they will use it to change the world for the better.

But he spends his time in the chapel praying for things to change, because sometimes trying is not enough. He prays for selfish things: A father that will thaw away with the dissolving snow, a mother who tries to fit him into the keyhole even though he won’t fit, for a world that is not razor-edged. He does not know if magic or even prayers will be enough, but at least there is Percival, too, who stays at his side.

Galahad uses his magic to make the flowers grow. He likes watching their stems curl from the ground and the soft petals unfurl. Today he grows flowers for Percival and thinks about the ones he wants to show him. Give him purple lilacs, Galahad thinks, and hydrangeas. And irises. And-

“What are you doing?”

The noise that comes out of his mouth is something like a fox’s cry and Galahad almost falls face first against the ground. Percival squats next to him, staring at the splashes of purple and periwinkle so bright and pale against the green. 

“I was trying to grow flowers for you.”

“Any reason why?”

“No, just that you like flowers and you’d make flower crowns for us when we were young-”

(A crown of gold doesn’t suit you, Galahad thinks. It weighs too heavy on your brow, when flowers do not.)

“Wait a moment,” Percival mumbles, and he notices what Galahad half-hopes he would and would not notice. “Hydrangeas mean heartfelt emotions, irises mean faith and hope, and purple lilac-”

“Are purple?”

“Well, yes. But purple lilacs also mean first love. Don’t they?”

“Mm-hm.”

Though he lowers his head Percival still presses his fingers to Galahad’s cheeks and moves in closer. When Galahad looks up, he’s smiling.

“I hope that’s what you’re trying to say. But it’d be just as nice if you picked those because you know purple and blue are my favorite colors.”

He almost closes the gap between them before pulling away, as if disenchanted from the magic of the fragrant air. “...Can I?”

Galahad nods. He tastes sweet but a little bitter, of fresh honey and fuzz-coated peaches. He lets Percival’s hands frame his face, fingertips pressing gently at his flaxen blonde hair. And it feels like an ending, the last blotchy-inked illustration in a storybook that will close and be over. Though a part of him knows that there will be more books to follow, more books that feel like the end but still have him praying - he pushes all of that aside and pretends that this is the last page. He can take a walk in his imaginations for a little while.

He pulls away and rests back on the grass, and Percival cradles him close. They have magic and their hopes sprouting from seeds in the ground, growing against the odds and through the winter thaw, and for the moment that is all that they need.

“Hold still and let me heal you.”

Even though they are tucked safely away from the sun in the canvas tent, the heat is still stifling. Galahad stares down at the stretch of red-soaked split skin on his stomach and the bloodied patches that peek through his shirtsleeve. The fight against the chimera was not an easy one; Galahad’s wounds are a testament to that. He’d been the one to jump in when it looked like Mordred and Percival would have been knocked down. Because even though they’re untouchable - they were blessed with their magic by God, after all, they are living vicariously through the bedtime stories parents spin - there is still a part of Galahad that wonders what if there was no happy ending where they all stroll back to Camelot hand in hand, the sun setting behind them?

Percival is gentle when he heals Galahad, blue magic lighting up the tips of his fingers as he cleans off the blood with a damp towel and knits the wound closed. He exhales for a few moments, taking in what it feels like to breathe without the strain of torn muscle in his body.

“Please be careful,” Percival says softly.

It’s not easy, though, when his life is nothing. So long as everyone else gets a chance to live, that would be enough. If he had to stay without being healed so that Percival would continue to breathe, he would. And he would protect those that the chimera’s flames could burn away even if it meant he’d end up dead and unmoving by the end of it. His life may mean nothing, but death in exchange for another is something.

“I was scared you’d get hurt. What if you or Mordred had died?”

“We won’t die. We were blessed - and I’ll protect you if it looks like you’d get hurt in the process. You can protect me, but I will want you to live on in the end. Because neither of us are going to die out there - we have our magic and we’re training as knights.”

Through the flap in the tent, the first fireflies have started to come out; indeed, the heat seems less oppressive now that night is falling. And Galahad believes him. All of them will live on. Time will pass and they will grow old and gray, but that is far from now. For now and in the near future, they’re alive.

“Alright. Thank you for healing me.” He kisses Percival on the nose. It’s a secret code of theirs, one that looks like close greetings from the outside. But there’s a sort of magic between them that one cannot find in any of the books nor written spells that they have, a magic that they understand best of all.

“It’s not a problem at all. Now let’s get some rest. The trip home tomorrow will be a long one.”

They are inseparable even as autumn sets aflame everything it touches. The court oohs and aahs at the talented young knights, of the pious Galahad and the gentle Percival. Surely, if anyone were to ever encounter the Holy Grail, it would be one of them. One day he will rise and travel to find it, and Galahad thinks that maybe the Grail can grant him what his prayers cannot: A better world, a better father that he’s related to by blood because the king is more of a father to him than Lancelot is. And he wishes that were not true. It is silly and flighty and childish and most of all selfish, so Galahad does not think about it very much.

“Winter’ll be here soon.” This is how they spend their nights when Galahad’s eyelids droop yet he still cannot fall asleep, so Percival stays with him till he closes his eyes and slips into his dreams at last. The candle has been snuffed out but the navy-shadowed room still smells like wax. It’s a familiar place and a familiar smell.

“I actually didn’t like winter very much growing up. Didn’t like it because I couldn’t play outside, and I didn’t have many people to keep me company. But I like it more now.”

“Really?” Percival says. “I always thought your favorite season was spring - that was when all your favorite flowers sprung up.”

“It is. But I don’t dislike winter as much as I used to.”

“Why’s that?”

“I like the winter,” Galahad confesses, “Because it reminds me of when you came to Camelot.”

Percival shifts, the covers rustling over him as he pulls Galahad close. Here in Percival’s arms they are once again untouchable, impervious to whatever will happen once the page turns.

“Where would you want to go when we get older? After the quest.”

They both know the quest will reach them and for a fraction of a moment the pedestal begins to crack. They pretend not to notice it, though, because they are focusing on the great after - their epilogue, their ending that they may not get if it means taking up the mantle of Atlas or breaking beneath the weight of the sky to sustain the rest of the world.

“Away.” Away from Camelot, away from my father - I can’t even call him ‘Father - even if it’s selfish. But it hurts here.

“I have a sister. Ended up inheriting the kingdom after her husband died in battle - her name’s Dindrane. She’s written letters to me once I visited her from Camelot. I think she’d be willing to let us stay there. It’s a big castle, with a lovely forest, and lots of trees so we can go apple-picking, and a beautiful lake to go swimming in.”

“We could still travel, though. I want to see more of the world and help more people that way.”

“Of course we will. We will travel around the world after the Grail quest - and maybe get married, too?”

“All of things. And more. But I’m getting too tired to-” Here he lets out a soft, high-pitched yawn - “-To say anything more on the subject.”

Percival laughs, soft like rain. “Sleep well.”

“Good night, Percival.” And then, to himself before he falls into a world of blurry dreams that aren’t so soft once he brushes against them: “Good night, my love.”

The night before the Grail Quest is winter and though he’s been stung before, it’s enough to make Galahad cry. Crying, he tells himself, will not solve anything - that is what Mother and the nuns taught you, and Father too even if he wasn’t there to do it. Crying is for children, and you’re no child: You’re eighteen going on nineteen, and you’re powerful enough of a knight and lucky enough to find the Holy Grail. Crying means you’re unworthy. It means you are weak.

When he hears a knock on the door and Percival’s voice on the other end he lets him in and clutches onto him, forgetting selfishness and restraint and letting the tears flow. His eyes are rimmed red and the deep gasping sobs make his throat sore and feel as though his chest might burst. He buries his head in Percival’s shoulder, tears staining his shirt and he lets go. He lets go because he knows. There are so many truths he knew from the beginning that Percival can’t comprehend and Bors remains oblivious to. And he wishes he were dead for it.

“Sorry - for crying - in front of you-”

“You don’t have to be sorry. It’s fine to cry.”

“I just - I just - everyone keeps comparing me and saying I’m even better of a knight than my father was and it’s horrible. I know he hates me for what I am or at least resents me for it, and I hate how the king treats me more like a son than my father does - and he treats everyone like family, so what am I to complain about special treatment? I’m just - I’m scared, and it’s selfish, and I’m not worthy, and I’m sorry. I don’t know. The Grail might not be worth it but if I think that it’s selfish. What if I make a mistake? What if I fail? What will the people of Camelot think of me then?”

Percival stays silent. He has no words of comfort to offer because they have laid the truth bare and taken it apart with a dull edged knife. They cling to each other because they are all they have left, they’re just trying to make their way through clusters of roses even though the thorns make them bleed. They know they’ll reach an ending and no matter what it is it will not be the ending they want.

“Maybe we could run away,” Percival says at last. “Forget about the Grail. You’re unhappy and I don’t want that. I heard you and Lancelot… shouting at one another. You’re not happy here. This place is not for you, not for us. So we could just leave it behind, and do good elsewhere. There’s still hope to change the world. But not here. Not like this.”

It is what they needed to hear, but it can’t be the truth. At least no one else but them would think it true. And they both know that there will be loose threads dangling if they run away now. What if they are found? What of the others at Camelot’s court that don’t hail them as the shining heroes that they really aren’t? What of Arthur himself? What of the Round Table? What then?

So Galahad lies awake wrapped in Percival’s arms. Tomorrow they will head off to find the Grail, and his father will be with them and Bors, too. And it will be his only chance to prove that he is not the selfish knight the nuns told him he must never be. If he finds the Grail then perhaps all will be right. Even though he is shattered, maybe that will be enough to plaster the broken pieces of the rest of the world back together again. But in Percival’s arms he can pretend. He can pretend that that will not happen once the sun rises.

He feels something shift next to him and moves his head a little closer against Percival’s chest.

“Please don’t go yet,” he pleads. 

Percival lies back down and cradles him close, fingers combing through his hair. First Galahad closes his eyes to the darkened room dipped in dark blue, then to the morning that will come, but still lets linger the beating of Percival’s heart.

“I won’t go. I can promise that much.”

Winter sucks everything of life, and it drains whatever might be left of the person Lancelot du Lac used to be. Because a father should not be like this. Or perhaps it is the Grail, an ever present reminder of what no one at Camelot will ever have.

“Do you know what it’s like to feel like you’re slowly being forgotten? Or how it feels to look down at scars and be told that she - your mother - was young and didn’t know any better than to leave scratches and make me feel like I’d never perform miracles again? What does it feel like to walk around as a reminder of what I used to be and what I’ll never achieve now?” “And you act as though I’m happy because of it! You act like I enjoy being told those things. Except I worry about every little mistake I might make - what will people think of me then? What will happen for every selfish thought I have? And you’re so far away from me because you can’t understand that. No, you don’t want to understand-”

“Then you’re no son of mine, because everything up to now is your fault!”

Time heals all wounds. Except the scars are still there and if you scratch at the scars enough they sting, and even if you leave them alone they will always serve as a reminder that maybe you wouldn’t end up this way. For Lancelot, his scars still make him ache. So Galahad leaves him behind, because maybe the pain of his scars will fade if what brings him pain leaves.

“Galahad, I-”

“No. You spoke the truth.” He wants to weep but that is a luxury he does not have, and he must steel himself for the quest. That’s what he vowed. “I will go and fetch the Grail myself, even if it means trading my life for it in the process. I will do it for my kingdom, and for our king.”

The seasons will bleed into one another. This will be his last quest. But it’s the only way to prove to himself and to everyone else that he is all they make him out to be. And if he goes alone, there will be no one else who has to deal with the pain.

“I’m going off on my own to seek the Grail,” he tells Percival. “I know I might die. But you shouldn’t. You deserve to go on. Once I find the Grail it will be alright.” In his heart of hearts he knows that this is not what should be. He wants to travel and live on, but to want for that is far too selfish, is it not? Though he smiles at Percival through the snow, he feels like he might break. 

“I love you,” Percival tells him, and pulls him close to kiss him. He does not tell Galahad that no, he should stay and continue to travel with the lot of them because both of them know that nothing will root Galahad to this place. He is not meant to grow here, to decay without the flames licking away at him till not even something burnt and broken remains. And the kiss is the first one that feels cold and full of nothing. Because that is all he is. Nothing.

“I love you, too.” This is not nothing. Galahad says that because he means it, and he knows that if he turns his back too soon he’ll never say those words again. They never really brought up those words because they both knew that it was not necessary to say with words, but now they say it because it is all they will have left.

When he turns his back he lets winter steal him away.

The seasons have passed and will continue to. The sun shines. And Galahad knows he does not have much time left - but for the others, the sun will rise and set, winter will morph into spring and summer into fall. Things will go on. He has finished his quest.

And then Percival finds him and he realizes that it didn’t mean a thing - he spent his life believing that if someone ripped away the blessings and his parenthood that he would be nothing, but the truth is that he had a chance to be something were it not for the Grail. He had a chance to be a little more of himself with Percival around, and he could have gone on not living in a shell.

So as he begins to fade, he asks Percival of one last thing: “Will you sing for me?”

He pretends that this is just another passing lullaby Percival hums to him as they both fall asleep in each other’s arms, that eventually he will wake up again and there will be a tomorrow he can move on into. That he will go on to be someone, and that they will be together without the Grail or anything above them tying them together. But that is not to be, so he wishes that Percival will realize that there is more to the world than a God that doesn’t answer their prayers and that damningly far away Grail, and that he can make the world safe little by little if he walks and clears the path.

The clock stops ticking. He can’t hear Percival sing. He closes his eyes one last time. And he smiles because he knows what he wants to know, and that this is the most important thing he has learned in the end.

He is gone, not even dust or ash in the breeze. But he still lingers - he cannot take a form that people will see, nor will his words on the wind be heard. Galahad must play the role of bystander, because he is not ready for the great after just yet. If he could talk to Percival and tell him that yes, he is there and not all gone, he would. But he can’t.

So he stays as a lingering presence at his side - a feeling of something simple like home again. He presses secret kisses to his brow, sends him quiet reminders not of his presence but that there is more beyond what he set out for, and that things will heal again.

It’s not an ending. Because if it was, they’d have reached that ending together. 

But he knows he did what he could even if it wasn’t what he needed. And that maybe one day he and Percival will meet again, and end their story the way it was meant to end.

Together.

[madpanda75]

“Game Day” Part of Hostage Series

It’s been sooo long since I’ve written about my Barba family. I’ve had this idea in my head for awhile (it’s what I do during staff meetings, daydream about fic ideas). 

It’s Mila’s first tee ball game! Also Rafael and the reader defend their marriage. Get ready for some domestic fluffiness, Queen Bees, misogynist pigs, and feisty comebacks 😍❤️

Disclaimer: I haven’t been to a tee ball game since I was a kid so forgive me for my inaccuracies in the art of tee-ball.

Saturdays were typically filled with pancakes, cartoons, and if you and Rafael were lucky, lazy morning sex, but today was different. It was opening day for Mila’s tee ball team and the Barba family was in full swing, preparing snacks and wrangling three kids to make it to the game on time.

While you were in the kitchen getting everything ready for the day, Rafael sat in the middle of the living room, keeping an eye on Mila and the twins. A smile slowly spread across his face as he watched Rory rock back and forth on her hands and knees. “Y/N! Come here! I think this is it. I think she’s gonna do it! I think she’s about to crawl!”

Rafael was determined to witness his daughter’s milestone. A few weeks earlier Ben began to crawl but unfortunately Rafael was in court and missed the event. Although you had taken a video, it wasn’t the same as being there to see his son scoot across the floor. He now understood why you were so upset when you had missed Mila taking her first steps.

“You can do it! Come on muñequita,” Rafael cooed.

Mila stopped practicing her swings and tapped on Rafael’s shoulder. “Papi, that’s wrong. I your moony-quita. Not her!” She furrowed her brows, placing one hand on her hip while the other pointed to her baby sister.

Rafael turned towards his oldest daughter, running a hand through her curls. “Of course you’re my muñequita. But so is your sister. You’re both my muñequitas, ok?”

“I guess that ok,” Mila mumbled, glancing between her sibling and her father with a look of skepticism.

“You’re still my number one girl.” He reassured her, kissing her cheek before turning back to Rory, outstretching his arms towards his daughter. “That’s it! Come to Papi!”

Rory grinned, drool dribbling down her cheek as she babbled at her father. Anticipation hung heavy in the air. Just when it looked like she was about to crawl, Ben beat her to the punch. The baby boy had been happily sucking on his toes when he decided to roll over and crawl towards Rafael, giggling as he scooted across the floor.

Watching her brother crawl into Rafael’s arms, Rory plopped down on her belly and began to cry. Her tiny face turning red as crocodile tears streamed down her cheeks. At the sound of his sister’s cries, Ben’s bottom lip quivered. It wasn’t long before he joined in, both babies crying and screaming, creating a cacophony that would wake the dead.

Mila covered both her ears. “Uh oh, they broken.”

Upon hearing your children wail, you ran into the room to find your husband with both babies in his arms, trying to calm them. “What happened?” You shouted to Rafael above the screams.

“I don’t know! One minute Rory was about to crawl, Ben got to me first and now this!”  Rafael looked bewildered, motioning to the chaos surrounding him.

You sighed, shaking your head slightly and took Rory from Rafael, rubbing soothing circles on her back. Now that the twins were getting older, their personalities were shining through. Rory may have favored you looks-wise but she was all Barba. You knew the reason for her outburst was because her brother had gotten to Rafael first, leaving her behind. While your sensitive baby boy was crying simply because his sister was.

“Aww pobrecita,” you cooed, bouncing your baby girl up and down. “It’s ok, mi amor. No more tears.” You glanced down at Mila and smiled, watching her put on her tee ball helmet. For the past few weeks, the tiny toddler insisted on wearing it around the house, only taking the helmet off during bath time. “You ready for your big game, baby?”

“Yep, we gonna crush them!” She exclaimed, jumping up and down.

You bit back a laugh. Who knew that four year olds had such a ruthless competitive streak. “Just remember to have fun. It doesn’t matter if you win or lose.”

“Yeah! Have fun crushing them.” Mila bared her teeth and growled before going back to practicing her swings.

Once the twins quieted down, you and Rafael placed both babies in their activity centers, hoping that would keep them entertained. “Mila, keep an eye on your brother and sister while Papi and I finish getting ready.”

You scampered off to the kitchen to finish preparing snacks for the game while Rafael retrieved the cooler from the hallway closet. He stopped in his tracks when he spied you standing on your tiptoes with your back to him, trying to grab a box of ziploc baggies from the top cupboard.

You were in full momma-mode, wearing a t-shirt that had Mila’s team name emblazoned on the back, a pair of denim shorts, and canvas sneakers. The casual outfit proved alluring to Rafael. It was simple yet sexy. Of course in Rafael’s eyes, you could be dressed in a potato sack and be sexy. A smirk tugged at his lips as he looked you over, drinking in your long legs, admiring your ass and the way your shirt rode up, revealing a strip of bare skin on the small of your back.

Rafael snuck up behind you and playfully tugged on your braid. He reached up and grabbed the baggies, handing them to you before winding his arms around your waist, dropping a kiss right below your ear, inhaling the sweet scent of your vanilla body spray.

You softly moaned in response, leaning back into his touch as his fingers skimmed the waistband of your shorts. “Excuse me, sir. My husband will be home any minute.”

“Your husband, hmm? You didn’t mention a husband last night while you were riding me,” Rafael purred, playing along with your little game.

“Must have slipped my mind.” You giggled and tilted your head, granting him further access as he continued to kiss down your neck.

“Does your husband make you come as hard I can,” he whispered, gently biting down your earlobe.

You turned to face him and wrapped your arms around his neck. “I don’t know. He’s pretty skilled.”

“Skilled? Well I guess I’ll just have to fuck you again. Make you forget all about that husband of yours.” He pushed you up against the counter causing you to gasp in surprise.

“Guess you will,” you whispered against his lips, kissing him deeply, tasting the remnants of coffee and mint on his tongue. “But later. Right now I need to place organic non-GMO fruit in baggies for a team of four year olds.” You reluctantly pulled away from Rafael and began to place dragon fruit and kumquats into the cooler, also sneaking in some extra baggies of grapes and orange slices. If your suspicions were correct, you knew the majority of the team, including your four year old, would be less than enthusiastic about the pretentious unusual fruit.

Rafael picked up a thick packet of paper that was tossed aside on the counter and snorted a laugh. “Dear Lord, what is this?”

You rolled your eyes. “Ugh a list of pre-approved snacks for toddlers, courtesy of Missy Schultz.” Missy Schultz was the Queen Bee in your neighborhood. She was leader of the Booster Club for Mila’s team, President of the PTA and a colossal pain in the ass. When you were pregnant with the twins, she stopped to lecture you for an hour about the benefits of eating your placenta. It took all your strength not to punch her in the face whenever you encountered her at any school or team function.

“The bar exam wasn’t as complicated as this,” Rafael mumbled, flipping to the back of the packet to review the appendix section.

You finished packing the cooler and looked over at your husband. He was wearing khakis shorts, a blue polo, and boat shoes. Even after six years together, it was still strange to see him in such a casual look. Rafael dressed to impress. His sharp tailored suits combined with his silver tongue was part of what defined him in the courtroom. His suspenders alone were enough to turn you into a puddle. But at home Rafael was more than an ADA, he was a husband and father. At home, he could relax.

Sensing your eyes on him, Rafael glanced over at you. “What?” He asked, popping a grape into his mouth.

“Nothing, it’s just...well look at us. Scrambling to get out the door before 9 am on a Saturday,” you said. “Remember when we used to have naked weekends?”

Way back before kids came into the picture, you and Rafael would spend your rare weekends off completely naked. Your Saturdays and Sundays would be spent having sex in every room of your apartment, cuddling and ordering takeout whenever you needed nourishment for the next round of lovemaking. You loved your lazy weekends with Rafael. It was a chance to escape from work and responsibilities, where nothing else mattered, just the two of you, living in your own little world.

Rafael groaned and playfully pinched your ass. “How could I forgot naked weekends. In fact, I vote we bring back naked weekends.”

“Papi, I don’t think we’ll be able to have a naked weekend for at least 18 more years.”

“Mami has been asking to have a sleepover with the kids,” he purred, snaking an arm around you. “I can’t promise a naked weekend, but how about a naked Saturday?”

“You got yourself a deal, Counselor.” You kissed him hard, your tongue snaking into his mouth, running your fingers through his hair. Pulling back, you straightened the collar of his shirt, looking him over one more time. “When did we become such parents?”

He grinned and rubbed the back of his neck, looking towards the living room. “Call me crazy but I think it’s when we decided to get married and have kids.”

Following his gaze, you came across a sight that made your heart melt. There was Mila standing in between the twins demonstrating to them the perfect pitch. Rory and Ben intently watched their big sister, babbling and sucking on their teething toys while she pretended to hit a home run.

You softly smiled at your children before glancing at the wall clock. “Oh we gotta go. Don’t wanna be late and face the wrath of Missy Schultz.” You walked back to the living room and picked up the twins. Rafael followed with the cooler in his hand, ushering Mila out the door for her first game.

*****

After dropping off Mila and a quick diaper change for Ben, Rafael walked over to the bleachers. He sat down next to you and Rory, warily watching the group of tiny toddlers on the field. “Oh God, I’m getting little league flashbacks. Of all the sports, Mila could pick from, why did she pick this.” He shook his head. “We shouldn’t be subjecting her to this type of pressure at such a young age. I mean one wrong game and you’re called “Bad Ball Barba” for the rest of the season.”

You snorted a laugh, playfully nudging his shoulder. “Papi, our little perfectionist has been practicing for weeks, I think she’ll be fine and besides maybe Mila will take after me and actually know how to hit the ball.” You winked, bopping Rafael on the nose with your index finger.

Rafael placed a hand over his heart, feigning offense. “That’s cold, baby.”

Just then a pungent smell hit your nose. You and Rafael exchanged a glance before looking down at Rory who was in desperate need of a diaper change.

“First Ben, now you,” he mumbled, his eyes darting between both babies. “Do you think they plan this?”

The twins giggled and for a split second you could have sworn you saw matching mischievous expressions on their faces. “Oh definitely. We’ll be right back. I told Sonny I’d meet him at the front anyways.” You got up with Rory and walked to the bathroom.

Rafael sat with Ben on his lap. The baby grinned and stared up at his father with big green eyes, reaching up with his chubby hands to grab the gold cross hanging around Rafael’s neck. A smile tugged at his lips as he snuggled closer to his son. “Hey, mijo. Papi loves you so much,” he softly said, kissing him on the forehead.

“Hi guys,” Olivia waved and walked up to Rafael, grabbing a seat on the bleachers.

“Liv, what are you doing here?” He asked, surprised to see the lieutenant at his daughter’s game.

She quirked an eyebrow at him. “Nice to see you too, Barba. Your wife invited me.”

“Sorry, I just wasn’t expecting you to be here. Where’s Noah?”

“Noah is at day camp right now and the house is way too quiet without him so I thought I’d stop by and get some baby time in.” She smiled at Ben and reached out to take him from Rafael. “Hi Ben. You’re getting to be such a big boy!” She cooed, bouncing the baby in her lap.

Rafael smiled and watched his son giggle with Olivia when he heard someone call his name. Turning towards the voice, he inwardly cringed when he saw his old partner, Blaine Driscoll. He and Blaine worked together at a private law firm before Rafael joined the District Attorney’s office. Blaine was a materialistic lecherous creep. He was greedy and shallow, caring only about making money and chasing tail rather than getting justice. It was people like Blaine Driscoll that made Rafael leave the private sector.

“Rafael Barba, you ol’ son of a bitch!” Blaine practically yelled causing a few parents to stare disapprovingly at the person who was cursing feet away from their children.

Rafael let out a long breath and plastered a smile on his face. “Blaine, what a surprise to see you here.”

“Yeah, my niece or nephew or god-whatever is playing so I thought what the hell and get this whole family function thing over with,” he mumbled, rolling his eyes. “What about you? Don’t tell me you have a kid.” He playfully punched Rafael in the shoulder a little too hard.

“Actually I have three. My oldest daughter is playing. It’s her first game,” Rafael nodded towards the field, rubbing his shoulder a bit.

“Well fuck me gently with a chainsaw. I never would have pegged you for being a family man.”

“Life is full of surprises,” Rafael replied who took a fussy Ben back from Olivia.

“That it is.” Blaine smiled and observed Rafael with the baby before looking Olivia over. “So how’d you nail down this son of a gun?” He asked the lieutenant.

Rafael and Olivia turned towards each other and laughed, shaking their heads. “No we’re not together. My wife is over there.” Rafael pointed to where you were standing next to Sonny talking to a tall blonde woman. From a distance he could see how angry you were and wondered if everything was ok.

Blaine followed Rafael’s gaze and whistled when he saw you. “Damn Barba, you’re batting WAY out of your league. I see you got yourself a little trophy wife. How the hell did you nab that hot piece of ass?”

Rafael’s eyes widened. “I beg your pardon!” Olivia’s jaw dropped, she could see smoke practically fuming from her friend’s ears.

Blaine ignored him and continued. “She played her cards right, snatching up an older man and saddling you with three rugrats.” He clucked his tongue and shook his head, looking sympathetically at Rafael. “Tough break, but take my advice and stick through it. Alimony can be a bitch in the state of New York.” He looked around before leaning closer. “If you ever need a little honey on the side. I can hook you up with someone hotter and younger.” He winked at his old partner. “Well, I better get going. See ya’ around, Barba.”

A heat began to creep up on Rafael’s neck. He saw red hearing his old partner talk about you in such a degrading manner. As Blaine walked away, Rafael gave Ben back to Olivia before standing up and grabbing him by the shoulder. He turned him around and got right in the man’s face.

“What the hell, Barba!” Blaine tried to move away but Rafael had a vice-like grip on his shoulder.

“You listen to me and you listen good. I don’t ever want to hear you talk about my wife. That’s the mother of my children and my family. You do it again and you’ll regret it,” Rafael told the man in a dangerously low tone.

Blaine smiled and shrugged Rafael off. “Is that a threat?”

“It’s a promise,” Rafael calmly replied, although his fists were shaking with rage. “Leave my family alone. Don’t talk to us. Don’t even look at us, you got that?”

“Sorry, won’t happen again.” Blaine held his hands up in surrender and walked away.

Rafael let out a shaky breath and ran a hand over his face, sitting back down and taking his son back from Olivia. “Wow, I’m impressed,” she said with a smirk. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you like that before, not even in the courtroom. You really told that creep off.”

Rafael nodded and held Ben close, stroking his dark curly hair. “Y/N and the kids, they’re my life. My heart. I would do anything to defend them especially from misogynist pigs.”

“I know, Barba,” Olivia softly said, squeezing her friend’s shoulder. “I know.”

*****

You changed Rory in record time. Placing her back in the baby carrier, you walked out of the bathroom, meeting your partner. “Hey, Sonny! Thanks for coming!”

“No problem. I wouldn’t miss Mila’s first game. What kinda godfather would I be, huh?” He tickled Rory’s feet causing the baby to squirm and giggle in delight.

Just then a shrill voice called your name. “Mrs. Barba?!”

You closed your eyes and groaned. “Is there a tall blonde woman in athleisure wear running towards me?” You asked your partner.

He nodded his head. “Yep, right behind you.”

You turned around, coming face to face with Missy Schultz. “Hi, Mrs. Schultz. How can I help you.”

“I was just heading back to my seat and I couldn’t help but notice that you use a baby carrier. You know researchers say you should really use a baby wrap. Not only is it environmentally-friendly but it holds the baby in a comfortable position, very similar to the way the child was in utero. It also strengthens the bond between mommy and baby, and-”

“Thank you, Mrs. Schultz,” you politely interrupted, knowing that you would be standing there for an hour listening to her praise the benefits of baby wrapping. “I’ll take that into consideration but I really need to go. I don’t want to miss Mila play.”

“Oh of course. We can talk after the game.” She smiled and looked over at Sonny, extending her hand to him. “Forgive me for being so rude. This must be the famous Mr. Barba. Mila talks about you all the time. You’re her hero.”

Sonny and you exchanged a glance and laughed. “Actually this is my partner from work and Mila’s godfather. My husband is over there with my son.” You pointed towards the bleachers where Rafael was talking to another man.

Missy’s eyes widened as she looked over Rafael. “Oh...yes. I noticed him dropping Mila off this morning. That’s...uhhh surprising.” She gave you a tight polite smile.

You knitted your eyebrows in confusion “Why would that be surprising?”

“Oh it’s nothing.” She waved you off. “Forget I said anything.”

You took a step towards her and continued. “It doesn’t seem to be nothing. Something seems to be “surprising” about my relationship with my husband.”

“It’s just hearing you and Mila talking about your husband. I was expecting someone younger, not someone who is about to qualify for his AARP card. I guess I’m different and didn’t want my kids raised by someone old enough to be their grandfather, but to each their own.”

“Excuse me!” You shouted.

“Y/N,” Sonny warned. “Let’s forget about it and go.”

“Not a chance! Take my baby!” You handed Rory to your partner before getting right in Missy’s face.

There was a twelve year gap between you and Rafael. At the beginning of your relationship, you heard concerns about your age difference from friends and family but you let it roll off your back. Age didn’t matter. You knew in your heart Rafael was the only man for you. But hearing Missy make snide remarks about your husband caused something inside you to snap.

“Let me tell you something, Missy. That man is my husband and the love of my life. He’s also an incredible and dedicated father. If I ever hear you say anything about him or my family again, I’ll shove that pre-approved snack pamphlet so far up your ass, you’ll have paper cuts on your tongue,” you threatened. She gasped in horror, clutching her chest. You walked away before turning around to make one last point. “Oh and one more thing, Rafael is dynamite in the sack. He makes me scream so loud even you would be able to hear it from your little Park Avenue palace. After a night with him, I’m lucky I can even walk. Remember that next time you want to comment on my man.”

Sonny’s jaw dropped, blushing profusely as he tried to cover Rory’s ears. You smiled at Missy and walked back to your partner, taking the baby from him. “Let’s go, Sonny.”

Sonny shrugged at Missy before following you to the bleachers. “Wow!” He whistled, his mind completely blown at your tirade. “Barba is one lucky guy to have you defend him like that.”

“I’m the lucky one, Sonny.”

He smiled and nodded his head. “Just do me a favor. Don’t ever tell me what you two do in the bedroom. I don’t need that image seared into my brain.”

“You should have seen what he did to me last night,” you teased, nudging his shoulder.

Sonny groaned in response. “Stop, I’m gonna be sick.”

While making your way to the bleachers, the man you saw Rafael talking to earlier brushed past you and Sonny. He looked visibly shaken. “Hey guys. Everything ok?” You asked, sitting next to your husband.

“Everything’s good,” Rafael replied. Olivia smiled and nodded her head in agreement. He took hold of your hand and interlocked his fingers with yours. “Are you guys ok?”

“Never better.” You glanced over at Sonny who was still blushing from earlier and winked. Turning your attention back to the field, you watched as Mila came up to the plate. “Oh she’s next!”

The little girl smiled brightly and waved at you and Rafael. “Look, that’s your sister.” He pointed Mila out to the twins. Rory and Ben shrieked with excitement, bouncing up and down in your’s and Rafael’s laps when they saw her. Rafael held his breath as Mila swung her bat, smacking the ball and sending it flying across the field, hitting a home run. You, Rafael, Sonny, and Olivia stood up and cheered as the toddler ran the bases.

“Way to go, muñequita!” Rafael exclaimed, capturing it all on video. He wrapped an arm around you and planted a sweet kiss on your lips. Pulling away, he couldn’t help but stare, completely mesmerized by you. Years ago, Rafael had made peace with the fact that he was going to end up old and alone, married to his job. Then one day you came and changed everything and here he was married with three beautiful children. The happiest he had ever been in his life and it was all because of you.

You blushed under his gaze. “What?”

“Nothing, it’s just...I love you.” He smiled, kissing each of the twins before kissing you one more time, gently caressing your cheek.

“I love you too,” you replied, nuzzling your nose against his before resting your head on his shoulder, watching the rest of the game.

Neither of you would ever tell the other what happened with Missy and Blaine because it didn’t matter what people thought. The only thing that mattered was your love for one another and the family you created out of that love.

@glimmerglittergirl @southern-magnolia @sweetcannolicarisi @delia26 @obfuscateyummy @sass-and-suspenders @eclecticminded @thatesqcrush @katmstanton @amirightcounsellor @beltzboys2015-blog @letty-o @sonnysdoll @lyssa1385 @sweetsummertime99 @burningsorr0ws @gibbs274 @izzythefanfreak @riodallas @babypink224221 @livxrafa @esparza-army @obsessionprofessional @ottosuricato

[omgjasminesimone]

Spousal Privilege Epilogue

Colt x MC

Author’s Note: In honor of hitting 100 followers (thanks followers!), a follow up to my most popular story, Spousal Privilege

Summary: Colt is out of jail, and ready to make Ellie his forever.

Rating: NSFW

Word Count: 3000

Colt walks out of the changing room, glad to be back in his own clothes after a month in jail house orange. He heads to the discharge desk, a spring in his step at his impending escape from this hellhole.

Sanchez slides a plastic bag full of Colt’s belongings across the desk. Colt opens the bag, pocketing his wallet, keys, and putting on his belt. Everything he’d had on him when he was unexpectedly arrested while leaving the burnt out remains of his father’s garage, returned at last.  

Sanchez plops a stack of paperwork on the desk. “Sign these. Read it if you want, if you’re just dying to spend more time here.”

Colt skims the paperwork quickly. Conditions of his bail, instructions for the ankle monitor he’s required to wear, acknowledgement they’ve returned his property, blah blah blah, he’s just ready to get out of here. He signs his name where he’s supposed to, passing the paperwork back to his least favorite correctional officer.

Sanchez signs the paperwork as well, leaving it on the desk. “You’re free to go. For now. See you when you’re re-arrested for some other crime.”

“I won’t be back Sanchez.” Colt smirks as he stands, his chair scraping across the concrete floor. “Try not to miss me too much.”

Sanchez’ jaw clenches. “Pshh…disrespectful.” He mutters as Colt walks out the door.

Colt smiles when he steps out into the Los Angeles sun, free from bars and armed correctional officers after a long 35 days. His smile widens when he spots her.  

She’s running towards him, her long braid swinging behind her. She’s wearing a simple white dress with a sweetheart neckline paired with white sneakers, and she’s beaming at him. She’s so damn beautiful. He wonders for probably the 50th time if his father is now serving as his guardian angel because if not for divine intervention he has no idea how he got so lucky with her.

She jumps into his arms and starts kissing him ferociously. Her legs wrap around his waist as he grips her outer thighs, returning her kiss with equal passion. It’s really been way too long. He’s certainly not going to miss the jail’s no touching rule. He presses her into the wall of the jail to better support her, deepening the kiss and cupping her right breast over her dress with his now free right hand.

She pulls away, eyes fluttering open. She blushes as he squeezes her breast. “Colt, we’re in public.”

“I know. But I can’t help myself. I want you so fucking bad Ellie.” He grounds his hips against hers, letting her feel how badly he wants her.

She unwraps her legs from around his waist and he reluctantly allows her to drop down to the ground. She gives him another kiss, chaste this time, stretching onto her tiptoes. “Later. We have to get married first.”

He raises an eyebrow. “We’re doing that today?”

She nods excitedly. “They had a cancellation and I got off the waitlist this morning! We’re so lucky Colt, the next appointment available is two months from now, which is after your trial.”

He looks towards the Heavens. ‘Thanks Pops.’ He thinks.  

She intertwines their fingers, leading him to her car. “We need to head downtown to the courthouse now. We can’t miss our appointment. I brought a change of clothes for you from your place.”

“Our place now.” He corrects, squeezing her hand.

She smiles softly as she unlocks the doors, sliding into the driver’s seat. She passes him a white dress shirt and black slacks as he takes the passenger seat. She quickly peels out of the jail parking lot, merging onto the 405 South.

He changes in the car, kicking off his jeans and leaving them crumbled on the floor. She glances at his exposed ankle monitor before he shimmies into the slacks. He catches the glance. “You know I have to charge this thing? It only has 12 hours of battery life. What a piece of shit.”

“Do you shower with it on?” Ellie asks, curious. She always loves to learn new things, and this is a whole new world for her.

Colt finishes buttoning his shirt. “They told me I literally never take it off. Hey, take the next exit. We need to make a pit stop.”      

“But we’re already running late!”

Colt rolls his eyes. Knowing her, she’s probably timed it so they’ll arrive at the courthouse thirty minutes early. “I need to stop by the bank. I found my Dad’s safety deposit box key in the garage. That’s what I was doing when I got arrested.”

Ellie merges to get into the exit lane. “Make it quick.” She warns.

He directs her to the bank, and jogs inside while she leaves the car idling in the parking lot. Ellie drums her fingers on the steering wheel impatiently. Colt returns moments later, a thick manila envelope in hand. Ellie merges back onto the 405. “So, what was in it?” She asks after a few moments of comfortable silence.

“Cash. Important paperwork.” He pauses, riffling through the envelope. “My grandparents wedding rings conveniently.” They’re stuck in rush hour traffic, so she takes her eyes off the road to look at the simple but beautiful diamond engagement ring he’s presenting to her.

“I know we’re not doing this right. I didn’t get down on one knee and propose, and we’re not having a real wedding like you deserve, but if there’s one thing I can do right it’s putting a diamond on your finger. We might have to get it fitted.”

Ellie smiles softly as Colt tenderly slides the ring onto her finger, it fits perfectly. He kisses her knuckles gently before releasing her hand so she can drive as the traffic clears up. “All of this is right Colt. I don’t need a fancy proposal or a big expensive wedding. You’re the only thing I want. I can’t wait to marry you.”

Colt leans back in his seat, looking at her appraisingly. “Did you tell your dad?”

Ellie’s hands tighten on the steering wheel. “No.” She admits. “I know what he’s going to say. I’d rather ask forgiveness than permission at this point….Did you tell your mom?”

Colt looks out the window. “No. I was afraid she’d tried to talk you out of it.” He turns to look at her, smirking. “I think she likes you more than she likes me at this point.”

“No one could talk me out of this Colt. It’s what I want.”

“I don’t know. My mom could probably make a pretty compelling argument. I think she sees a lot of her in you. And a lot of my dad in me.”

Ellie exits the freeway, almost to the courthouse now. “We’re not them. We’re our own people, with our own story.”

…

..

.

“You may now kiss the bride.” The court officiant says, after seeing that all their paperwork is in order.

Colt smiles, not a smirk for once, and grips Ellie’s neck, capturing her lips. Another bride-to-be Ellie struck up a conversation with in the waiting room (they were early, just like Colt suspected) snaps photos on Ellie’s phone.

Ellie smiles when he pulls away. He takes his grandparents’ wedding bands out of his pocket, slipping the smaller gold band onto her finger. He hands her the matching wedding band and she slips it on him.

He intertwines their fingers and they walk down the aisle towards the exit.

Ellie’s new friend smiles, returning her phone. “I took a lot of pictures. Hopefully some of them are good! Congratulations you two.”

“Thank you so much!” Ellie chimes. She turns to Colt. “Ready to go to our apartment?”  

He’s been ready to get her home all day. But had this been a real wedding, they wouldn’t be consummating it yet. There would have been a reception, with dinner and drinks and dancing. She deserves that. “Not yet. You’re mine now, officially, forever. That calls for a celebration.”

…

..

.

Colt throws an arm around Ellie as they relax in the VIP booth of the nightclub. Neither of them is old enough to be here, but that was easily solved with a pair of fake IDs. They’ve been dancing and drinking (he double checked that his ankle monitor isn’t one of the newer ones that can detect alcohol) for hours, so now they’re content to enjoy the VIP booth he paid for with some of the safety deposit box money.

Ellie scrolls through the wedding pictures on her phone. “This is a good one.” Colt glances at the photo. They’re kissing, her diamond ring and wedding band visible since her hand is on his cheek.

“Yeah, it’s nice.” He agrees.

“I’m going to email it to my dad and tell him that we’re married.”

Colt raises a brow. “Is that the alcohol talking?”

“No, I know if I try to tell him in person he’s going to interrupt me. He’s not going to let me say what I need to say. This way is better.” She insists.

“Whatever you say Mrs. Kaneko.” He smiles. He’s never going to get sick of that. Mrs. Kaneko.

She types for several moments, and he plays with her long brown hair. “And….sent.” She sighs, as if a great weight has been lifted off of her. “Let’s go home.”

He smirks. Finally, what he’s been waiting for all night.

…

..

.

Colt unlocks the door and carries Ellie over the threshold of their one bedroom apartment in West LA. He gently puts her down, surveying the familiar apartment. Ellie loops her arms around his neck, hugging him gently. “Welcome home.”

“You’re my home.” He can’t help but reply, capturing her lips and walking her backwards into their bedroom. He gently pushes her down onto the bed, breaking their kiss. “Sorry there are no rose petals on the bed.” He unbuttons his shirt, allowing it to fall to the floor. “And no candles.” He drops his pants, climbing on top of her and supporting his weight with his arms.

“I don’t need that. I just need you.” She replies, reaching her hand into his boxers and gripping his manhood. She starts to stroke. After 35 days of celibacy, that alone is almost enough to make him cum. He quickly removes her hand from his boxers, not wanting their wedding night to end prematurely. She looks at him questionably.

“I want to take care of you first.” He explains, pulling the white dress over her head and tossing it to the floor. He freezes when he sees the lacy white lingerie she’s wearing underneath. That’s new. He feels himself becoming uncomfortably hard at this image of her, splayed out beneath him, hair fanned out on the pillow, chest softly rising and falling. The lingerie is practically see through, erotic but somehow still innocent at the same time. He almost doesn’t want to take it off of her. He commits the image to memory, gaze sweeping over her from head to toe.

She blushes at his intense gaze. “Colt?”

“You’re so beautiful Ellie. I can’t believe you’re mine.” He admits, trailing kisses over the tops of her breasts which are spilling out of the bra. Her fingers tangle in his hair as his kisses trail lower. Over her stomach, down to her inner thighs. He nips at her hip, pulling her panties down with his teeth.

“Colt….” She breathes out as he kisses between her legs. He grips her thighs, pulling her further down the bed as he licks and sucks at her most intimate area. Her back arches off the bed, her grip on his hair almost painful. His tongue delves inside her and she comes apart, seeing white until she slowly comes down from her orgasm.

She barely notices him removing his boxers, but she feels him as his hard shaft brushes her entrance. She starts to remove her bra, but Colt stops her, intertwining their fingers and pinning her hands near her head. “Don’t. I like it.” He slowly pushes into her. He groans at the feel of being inside her again. It’s been way too long. He promises himself it will never be that long again.  

“Colt, faster.” Ellie mutters, eyes closing in ecstasy as he follows her instructions, pumping into her faster and harder.

“Whatever Mrs. Kaneko wants.” He promises, the headboard slamming against the wall as he thrusts more and more aggressively. She tries to match his enthusiasm, rolling her hips in time with his thrusts.

He releases one of her hands, thumb trailing down between them to press at her clit. “Ahh…Colt.” Her free hand scratches down his back, leaving scratches but she’s too far gone to apologize. Loud moans and grunts fill the room. Colt laughs when his neighbor starts banging on the wall, wanting them to quiet down.

He captures her lips as her walls tighten around him, swallowing her loud cry as she orgasms again. As soon as she lets go, he does too, pulling out of her and cuming on her stomach. Colt rolls off of her, grabbing his shirt from the floor and wiping her stomach with it.

“That…was something else.” She comments, cuddling into his side. He unclasps her bra, and she allows it to fall to the bed. His thumb circles a nipple.

“I hope you’re not tired. I’m not done with you yet.” Colt insists.

…

..

.

Colt is awoken a few hours later by the loud knocking at his door. He looks at his sleeping wife, stirring now as the banging continues. Colt rolls out of bed, throwing on a pair of sweatpants and going to the door. He looks out the eyehole, and sees what looks like a cop outside his door.

“You think it’s my parole officer?” He calls back to Ellie, opening the door.

A fist collides with his face.

Colt clutches at his nose, his hands filling with blood. “What the fuck?!” He complains, looking at the man who just stormed into his apartment.

“You son of a bitch.” The man seethes, looking at Colt with hate.

“Dad?” Ellie calls from the bedroom when she recognizes the voice.

The man, Detective Wheeler, Colt now realizes, stalks towards the bedroom. “What is wrong with you Ellie?”

Colt locks the door and slumps onto the couch in the living room, tilting his head back to try to stem the bleeding.

“Wait, Dad,…let me get dressed first!” Ellie shouts, slamming the bedroom door just before her father can get there. Detective Wheeler glares at him anew after hearing that. Colt grimaces. This is definitely not how he wanted meeting Ellie’s father to go.

Moments later, the bedroom door opens and Ellie steps out, wearing the white dress again. “What are you doing here Dad?”

“What are you doing here Ellie?! You’re married!? To a criminal?! And you deferred college?! I know you’re technically an adult now, but you’re definitely not acting like one.” Mr. Wheeler yells.

Ellie rolls her eyes, storming past her father and into the kitchen. She grabs an icepack out of the freezer, stalking into the living room and plopping down beside her husband on the couch. She gently removes his hands from his face so she can look at it. Her father has followed her into the living room. “I think you broke his nose.” She complains, placing the ice pack to Colt’s quickly bruising face.

Detective Wheeler’s glare does not soften. “He’ll live.”

Suddenly, someone else is banging on their door. Colt sighs and opens it again, not even bothering to check who it is. He’s pretty sure he knows.

She slaps him. Hard. “What the fuck Mom!” He clutches at the red mark he’s sure is forming on his face.

“Language!” His mother admonishes, glaring at him. “That’s for marrying that poor girl. And telling me about it via text message!” She slaps him again. “And that’s for getting arrested in the first place. I told you not to come out here. I told you to stay away from your father. You never listen Colt.”

She steps around him and into the apartment. She looks around the room and seems to quickly assess what’s going on. She walks over to Detective Wheeler. “Ellie’s Dad?” She questions. He nods. “I’m Colt’s Mom, Naomi Inoue. I’m sorry about all this. I promise you I raised him better than this.” She turns to glare at her son.

“Kyle Wheeler. And I thought I raised Ellie better than this too.” Mr. Wheeler replies.  

“Colt isn’t a bad kid. I think he was just trying to impress his father. But now, I assume he’ll be trying to impress his wife so hopefully that will keep him on the straight and narrow.”

Mr. Wheeler’s fist clench at the ‘wife’ comment, in disbelief that his sweet little Ellie is now this punk’s wife.

“Mom, that reminds me.” Colt leaves the living room, retrieving the manila folder from the kitchen table. “I emptied Dad’s safety deposit box. I want to pay you back for the bail.” He meets his Mom’s dark brown eyes. “Thank you, for doing that for me.”

“I don’t want the bail money back Colt. I want you to not run, to do what you’re supposed to do. Be the man I know you can be. Then I’ll get the bail back from the courts.”

“Not all of it. They keep a certain percentage. I want to give you enough to make you whole in all this since the criminal justice system is all a big scam.” Colt catches Detective Wheeler’s offended look. “No offense.” He adds.

Naomi accepts the money Colt is offering. Then, she grips Colt’s chin, checking on his nose. She’s a nurse, so she can tell it isn’t actually broken. “You probably deserved that.” She comments.

Colt looks over at Ellie, who is sitting on the couch as her father speaks to her in angry whispers. She meets his gaze with a sad smile. “She’s worth it.”

Naomi claps her hands once, getting everyone’s attention. “Well, now that we’re all family I think we all have a lot to talk about. Colt, put on some coffee.”

…

..

.

taglist:  @brightpinkpeppercorn @choicesarehard @lovehugsandcandy @powdesiree0816 @regina-and-happiness @iplaydrake @hazah @sibella-plays-choices @eileendannie @maxwellsquidsuit

[bentenharuki]

I generally don’t do these but...

I will do this because it’s a badge of honor and a thank you for @todayintokyo who gives me a daily vibe out of my second fav Country in the world (first one is my own, of course. My messy, chaotic, genius Italy).

So for everyone interested (I won’t tag people either... if you are among my 250+ readers, do it as freely as you like to share this unexpected hard time along others. Sharing makes us all feel less stranded I guess :)) 

1. Are you staying home from work/school? Yep. My University (Milano Bicocca) holds in-house lessons and curses and also exams and testing are/will be online. What I miss most are the lab works and the exchanges with foreign schools. I took one a few months ago in London and I was supposed to have another in May but... NOPE, of course.

2. If you’re staying home, who’s there with you? I am alone in my apartment. At first it was supposed to be shared rent with somebody else but then my parents just bought this out and lent it to me. I know. I am spoiled. But very grateful for what I have. I always try to give back the best I can because no one has merits in being born in a family instead of another. (pieces of second-rate philosophy in all my LONG answers courtesy of my mum and her influence on me. She’s a University Professor and her field is.. guess what.. ETHICS PHILOSOPHY)

3. Do you have pets to keep you company? Nope. Not allowed. But I like cats. Cats. CATS. They are elegant, refined, very clean, and they give you consideration and affection ONLY if they like you. I prefer to conquer somebody’s love instead than to have it by default. Then I am naturally a cat person instead of a dog’s. But I like all animals (I like snakes as well, so my range is pretty wide ;)), even though I don’t feel missing any in  house. Generally I would be out of home most of the day and no pet would be happy in staying that much alone. I miss my grandparents’ kitty tho :)

4. Who do you miss the most? Family. Friends. Meeting new people when out. And... (is it fine to say it?) Well... in these lockdown times I miss... human touch. (You get what kind). I was seeing a guy when this all started and my old boyf also came back into the picture somehow. All on hold. And I avoid to think how that makes me feel because even in case I’d figure it out, what comes if one can’t act on the awareness? Exactly. So I put it all in a LONG pause. But yeah... I miss contacts. A LOT.

5. When was the last time you left your home? I go out every Thursday to buy all my grocery stuff. I am very methodic. My supermarket is pretty near and it’s BIG and I get there right before it opens (well... one hour almost before it opens, so I can be among the firsts in line). I look like a ninja: very sporty and technically dressed (like for a running competition!) with clothes and shoes which are easy washable, tech mask (it is for cycling competition, with filters specifically medical: the mask is washable as well after you’ve used it, while the filter is obviously not), cotton fit gloves and over them medical gloves (I can’t wear directly medical gloves because my skin is very sensitive and I suffer from nickel allergia, which makes latex gloves a NO NO directly on skin), teck googles which cover also the side of my face (those are from cycling items too) and of course PODS in my ear because I can’t live without music :)

6. What was the last thing you bought? I bought online a few garden tools for my biggest balcony. I have ZERO skill with plants (and I am supposed to become a biologist... the nerve! LOL) but I am keen at making grow at least rosemery for my recipes. I have a little peach tree and it is all fine so far. I have hope I can do better and anyway I have time now ;)

7. Is quarantine driving you insane or are you finally relaxed? I try to keep my routine as it was before. I wake up and perform all my tasks exactly as I was doing before this all started. I am VERY organized and to lax on that would ruin me, so I carefully focus on what I can control the best I can. It feels strange to say it maybe but... this way my mood isn’t particularly affected by this heavy revolution in my (and everyone elses’s) life.

8. Are you a homebody? NOPE. I love people, I love my Milan and its being always full of people everywhere. I love living in my town a TON, I love meeting friends anywhere, go dancing, I love to live my University life in this beautiful and renewed part of Milan; I like being surrounded by my people and meeting new ones. So being stuck at home would seem insufferable for me. But I learnt from this (there’s always something to learn in any experience) that I can be surprisingly ok with staying home too. I came to know better my neighbors. I feel a sense of community with everyone living nearby and I have come to love my domesticity too. It was a surprise for me first ^.^

9. What movies have you watched recently? In Italy, Italia 1 channel has had the WONDERFUL idea to rebroadcast all Harry Potter saga every Monday and Thursday. Today and tomorrow there are the last two installments, so I can say that is what I looked out the most for as in movie things these past weeks (funny how I never particularly adored the books of HP, I mean, I liked them but... being a Tolkien’s devotee Rowlings’ literary efforts always seemed lackluster to me.. and still I have always liked the movies. It’s incoherent I know ;)). But I have Sky at home so I can watch whatever movie I like to whenever I want to. And that leads to VERY little watch actually. I am reading a ton though. I watch what passes on in the National channels actually, out of digital and cable and decide to watch it or not. For instance last Friday Rai 1 (main Italian Channel) broadcasted one of my fav movies from the past three years, GIFTED (with Chris Evans and Octavia Spencer) and I rewatched it with immense pleasure.

10. An event that you were looking forward to that got cancelled? OLYMPICS. I was supposed to be back in Japan with a a couple of friends and my bro for experience the Olympics (especially the volleyball tournaments) between July and August and that got (of course) cancelled. We plan to move it all to next year of course. But it hurts SO MUCH because it was easily what I was looking forward to BEST for all 2020. Hands down.

11. What’s the best and worst thing you’ve had to cancel? Look up. For the other question, I never plan things I don’t like (or at least I try my best not to) and I almost never find myself in the position of being happy for something I had going on which I had to pass due to circumstances. I am a very honest (sometimes to the point of bluntness, though with age I got trained in the fine art of diplomacy, which for me is declined especially in the “IGNORE WHAT IS NOT WORTHY degree) person and if there is something I don’t like I tend to not get involved with it in the first place.

12. Do you have any new hobbies? Eh... the longest list... I love so many things. Sport don’t count as hobbies to me because I treat them as part of my daily life constantly. So take them off. I like to write, to draw, to paint... I like reading, I like learning... I am a tech geek; I like gaming (but that I have to cut it or it would absorb me too much)... I like TRAVELING (that is cut off too of course nowadays), and many other things so I guess I don’t literally have SPACE for new hobbies. My many ones makes it impossible to fall for new things though lately I am becoming a better cook out of needs ;)

13. What are you out of? My lists are made as soon my things become “two items in from having 0″. This way I can’t run out of anything. Did I say already I am a HUGE control freak? THAT ;)

14. What music are you listening to? My itunes collections lists so far 12376 ALBUMS. Then I have the random songs. Latest one I bought (because I buy them all) is Achille Lauro’s latest 16 Marzo 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yb-9RESbeWA

I am also listening a lot to one of my bro’s fav bands Radiohead and as usual a lot to my beloved Imagine Dragons. My mum and dad are also telling me to listen to Bill Withers (who recently passed away) whole discography because he was amazing. I love many music genres. I love ALL which makes the spirit soar and rage and evolve and love and cry and hope.

15. What are you reading? So far in quarantine I read 5 books. I have now to start ORIGINS by Dan Brown. I pick the books I have left unread randomly and that was the pick this time (people gift me with books constantly because they know I am a bookworm when I have spare time).

16. What are you doing for self-care? Keep loving myself and life and the world exactly the way I used to before this all started.

17. Are you exercising? Yup. Tapis roulant, golf training, stepper (all in my house lucky me) and mat and weight training. I have a routine for which I have to train at least one hour a day. NO EXCEPTION. I miss swimming but I will do. I am also in recovery after January’s knee meniscus intervention so my schedules are also taking that into consideration.

18. How’s your toilet paper supply? I'm OK. :)

19. Have you made any changes to your hair during quarantine? Nope. I love to stylize my hair but I don’t have specific cuts. It grows long and then I play with them hairstyles: braids, buns, ponytails, partitions and the likes.. But I have bleached hair and I had to follow my hairdresser advice because I can’t allow ugly roots to take dominance of me ^.^ So I bought the necessary to self bleach them. No need to say as soon as I will be able to, Hairdressers and Massages and SPA will be my first destination ^.^ (beside visiting family and friends of course).

I am fairly sure I put lots of typos and mistakes in this but I have my online lesson just starting in 8 minutes and I can’t review this (I generally never do it anyway). So forgive me and have a beautiful day ;)

STAY SAFE OUT THERE!!! Hugs K.

[artificialqueens]

nobody knows where we might end up, chapter three (branjie) - holtzmanns

(read on ao3) | (tumblr)

“Great. It’s a date, then. Well, not a date. A study date. Studying time. You know what I mean.” Vanessa claps a hand over her mouth before she can say anything worse. “Ugh.”

Brooke giggles, reaching up to bring Vanessa’s hand down from her face, and Vanessa prays to the Lord that she doesn’t see the blush rising on her cheeks. “I got it. Don’t worry.”

AN: Thank you so much for the lovely response to this fic! I appreciate it so much. Writ is the best for being both a wonderful beta and roaster and this story would Not exist without them.

(then)

“Yes Mama, I’m eating well.” Vanessa rolls her eyes when her mom replies on the other end of the phone in rapid fire Spanish. “No, I’m not just eating pasta, I promise.” 

“I don’t want you to waste away, mija. You need a vegetable every now and then.” Vanessa can almost picture her mom on the other end, phone on speaker as she drives to work. 

“I eat vegetables! Sometimes.” She’s trying to, at least. Learning to cook in a small residence suite kitchen is hard. She should have gotten a meal plan, but past her had thought that making her own meals would be a more fun experience. 

Past her hadn’t been the smartest.

“Fucking idiot, trying to cut into my lane - what did you say, Vanessa?” It makes Vanessa snort. Her mom had been the one to teach her to drive, which more than explains her own trash talking when she’s behind the wheel. 

“I’ll leave you to drive, Mama, the lecture is starting soon anyway. Be safe.” She hangs up as her mom yells at her to come visit for Thanksgiving. 

Vanessa looks around at the students trickling into the lecture hall, eyes peeled for a certain blonde in particular. Her bag rests on the seat beside her, saving it for Brooke. 

The floor hangout had been fun. Real fun. She’s never seen Brooke loosen up, their times during lecture spent focusing on the course material. But making her smile, twirling her as she danced - Vanessa wants to make Brooke that happy again. 

Brooke looks tired when she falls into the seat beside Vanessa, moving her bag. Vanessa reaches out to fix the collar of Brooke’s shirt, which is sticking up on one side, and doesn’t miss the way that her cheeks turn pink. 

“What’s wrong, B?” 

“Nothing, I just…” Brooke fiddles with her laptop case, biting her lip, “I still don’t fully understand the last lecture, and was trying to go over it again before class because we’re starting new things, and if I don’t get that then what if I don’t understand what he teaches today-”

“Okay, slow down.” Vanessa holds up a hand, making Brooke stop her rambling and take in a breath. “How about we go over it together? You have any free time after class today?” 

Score. Vanessa wants to pat herself on the back. She’s been trying to figure out a way to get Brooke to hang out with her for weeks, but couldn’t think of how to ask without sounding desperate. This way? They can both get work done too. 

She has no clue if Brooke is also gay, but who cares? It’s not like that. It’s not. Sure, dancing and goofing around with Brooke was nice, and sure she wants to do it again more than anything, but…she also wants to be her friend. Help her out a little. 

Well. More than her friend, but still. 

Brooke looks at her in surprise. “Yeah? You’d wanna do that?” 

“Sure, why not? And you can teach me the mnemonic you used to memorize the cranial nerves so damn fast.” 

Brooke smiles, a real smile, and it makes Vanessa grin in response. “I’d like that.” 

“Great. It’s a date, then. Well, not a date. A study date. Studying time. You know what I mean.” Vanessa claps a hand over her mouth before she can say anything worse. “Ugh.” 

Brooke giggles, reaching up to bring Vanessa’s hand down from her face, and Vanessa prays to the Lord that she doesn’t see the blush rising on her cheeks. “I got it. Don’t worry.” 

The professor clears his throat then, draws their attention to the tricuspid valve on the PowerPoint slide, and Vanessa leans back in her seat with a sigh of relief. The adrenaline rush from asking Brooke to simply hang out was enough to power a small town, at least. She’s too weak for this girl. 

The three hour lecture feels like it flies by with the promise of later. She likes cardio, she gets cardio, it makes sense in her head. 

Brooke, however, radiates with nervous energy that becomes stronger and stronger as the lecture goes on. Vanessa turns to her at the break. 

“Don’t be freaking yourself out.”

“I’m not.” Brooke’s protest is feeble. 

“Imma distract you.” Vanessa racks her brain. She knows these spirals, she’s been in enough herself. “Wanna hear about my dog, Riley?”

Brooke turns out to be a real animal person, cooing at all of the pictures of Riley that Vanessa proudly shows her. In turn, Brooke tells her about her two cats back home, Henry and Apollo. 

“Is that Henry in a sweater?”  Vanessa nearly screeches at the picture that Brooke shows her. 

Brooke can’t hold back a grin. “He’s so fluffy that his fur was sticking up every which way after I took it off of him. He strangely likes wearing it, though.” 

Vanessa whistles. “Damn. One time I put Riley in boots to protect his feet from the salt and ice and he walked in a snowbank on purpose to lose ‘em.” 

Brooke looks lighter when the lecture starts up again, and Vanessa has to resist the urge to reach out and squeeze her hand. 

She racks her brain throughout the second half of the lecture of where she can take Brooke to study. Not the silent study zone, where they wouldn’t be able to talk, not the group study area which is always way too noisy, but-

“Psst.” She nudges Brooke, who looks surprised by Vanessa talking in class. “You ever been to the top floor of the library?” 

Vanessa tugs her there after class, weaving between the shelves of old books and stacks on the floor to pull her to a window overlooking the rest of campus. The floor is empty save for the two of them, most students occupying the study areas on the first and second floors. 

Brooke whistles. “How did you find this?”

“I like to walk around while memorizing things, sometimes. Helps my brain think. Somehow ended up here one day.” Vanessa shrugs. “I like it up here. It’s quiet. Peaceful.” 

“Sure is.” Brooke’s voice is a whisper as she looks out the window, seeing the rest of the campus buildings from above. “I can see our residence building from here.” 

“Pretty cool, huh?” Vanessa grins, setting her bag down on the table beside the window. “Now c’mon. I promised you a cardio review.” 

 Vanessa’s real glad that her evening lecture has been cancelled, her professor emailing in the morning that they were going to be out with the flu. When she looks at her watch, she nearly yelps when noticing the time. 

“8:30 already? Damn, it’s been what, like, four hours?” She looks over at Brooke, who closes her physiology textbook with a thud. 

“Jeez, you’re right. It hasn’t felt that long at all.” Brooke’s loosened up throughout their study session, pulling her feet up onto her chair and freeing her hair from the braid it was in so that her it cascades down over her shoulders in waves. 

“Time flies in good company.” Vanessa winks at her, second-guessing the action as soon as she does it because is it too forward? But then she sees the way that Brooke blushes, smiles shyly back at her, and her heart settles down from the flips it had started to do. 

“Thank you, by the way. You definitely didn’t have to spend so much time going over all of this with me.” Brooke’s facial expression is tentative as she peeks over at Vanessa while packing up her things. 

Vanessa waves off Brooke’s words. “I got stuff out of it too, helped me review everything. Now we’re both set for the first two units.” 

Of course, she wants to spend as much time as she can get with Brooke, but that’s neither here nor there. Nor does Brooke need to know. 

Brooke looks at her phone and bites her lip. “Shoot. I was supposed to meet my roommate to grab dinner with her at that sushi place on campus. I gotta go.”

Brooke pauses, though, turning to Vanessa with an expression that she can’t decipher. 

“Do you want to do this again next week? Make it a thing? I had fun.” Brooke’s looking at her like she’s absolutely terrified of what her answer may be. As if Vanessa would ever say no. 

“Hell yeah. I had fun with you too, B.” Vanessa grins then, remembering the words she had said to Brooke the first time that they had met in lecture. “Same time next week?”

“Definitely.” 

A standing study date with a cute girl. Well, not a date, but still. Vanessa’s happy with it. 

 “Silky. My sweet Silk with the good milk. I am in love.” Vanessa flops onto her bed in the most dramatic fashion that she can. 

Her roommate doesn’t even look up from her book. “You said the same thing last week after trying the lasagna in the dining hall that you bought. It wasn’t even that good.”

Vanessa rolls over, supports herself on her elbows. “It was, ‘cause I didn’t have to cook it. But seriously.”

Silky turns a page of her book. “Who you in love with now?” 

“Her name’s Brooke. She’s in Human Physiology One with me. Lives on the other end of the hall, actually. She’s so cute, Silk.” Vanessa thinks of how they basically spent the entire evening together, and from the way her heart starts to beat faster, she feels like a schoolgirl with a crush. 

“Want me to hook you up with this one, too?” Silky’s been her best friend and wing-woman from high school, responsible for multiple of Vanessa’s girlfriends in the past. 

“No, not this time.” Vanessa shakes her head. Divine Silky intervention just wouldn’t feel…right. “I don’t even know if she’s gay.”  

“You lesbians are always a fucking mystery to me. How you gonna woo her, then?” 

Vanessa shrugs. “I dunno. We just studied together for like four hours, though.” So what if her voice comes out a bit dreamier than intended?

“Oh so she a nerd too, huh? Match made in heaven.” Silky snorts. “Someone else at your batshit level.”

“Hey.” Vanessa pouts at her. “I like human biology. It’s fun. And so does she.”

Silky waves a hand at her. “Can’t relate. Thank God I didn’t have to take bio past grade eleven. Imma stick with my English major, thank you very much.” 

Vanessa makes a face. “Beats me how you can write such long ass papers without getting bored.” 

“You ramble so much about wack ass shit as it is. Put that down on paper and channel it into something constructive. Not too hard.” 

“Boring.” Vanessa sticks her tongue out at her. “Anyways. I need to get her to like me.”

Silky snickers, looking up from her book. “You sound like you’re in middle school.”

Vanessa is unperturbed. “Laugh all you want now, but imma make it happen.” 

Silky finally puts her book down, looking up at Vanessa. “Just be yourself, boo. If she’s any good at all, she’ll like you for you.You shouldn’t have to change yourself for anyone else.” 

Vanessa raises an eyebrow. “Surprisingly profound, even for you.”

Silky opens her book again. “What can I say? Sometimes I have moments where I channel the spirit of fucking Mr. Rogers himself.”

“I’d have watched you on TV as a kid. Even though I would have gotten so scarred by what I saw.” Vanessa ducks from the pillow that Silky tosses in her direction. “See! Already under attack.” 

“Talk shit, get hit. Now let me read.” Silky’s voice is good natured, and Vanessa can’t help but grin. She’s lucky that she’s gotten to room with Silky for their first year. Better her than a random stranger that she’d have to get to know. 

(now)

Vanessa pulls her coat tighter around her, crossing her arms to try and keep herself from shivering. She had forgotten how fucking cold Toronto is, even in the early fall. 

Los Angeles had spoiled her. The sun, the dry heat…she had thrived from her first day of medical school up to becoming a cardiothoracic fellow. But she had needed more. Wanted to go farther. Being back in Toronto will give her that - at least, she hopes so. 

She’s closer in location to her mom now, at least, and has her if nothing else. 

“Morning, Dr. Mateo!” Dr. O’Hara waves at her from the Starbucks line. 

Vanessa waves back, weaving in between the crowd to get closer to her. “Ready for our joint consult today?” 

“Very much so. I’m excited to work with you.” Dr. O’Hara’s grin is infectious, making Vanessa break out into a smile too despite the ridiculous early hour. 

“Likewise. I’ve always wanted to try a transcatheter aortic valve replacement. Didn’t have access to the materials back in LA.” 

“Really?” Dr. O’Hara looks surprised at that. “I thought that they’d have everything a surgeon would need in the US.”

Vanessa shrugs. “Nah. The hospital I worked at wasn’t a cardiac centre, so they stuck to the basics, referred out to other centres for more complex procedures. Had to fight to do the ones that I did.” 

“Speaking of which, the pericardial closure that you were able to do successfully and wrote about? Amazing. I hope you have the chance to do one here.” 

Vanessa grins. Her new colleagues, especially in the cardiac unit, have been incredibly supportive, hearing out her out of the box ideas and helping her find research evidence to back them up. More support than she had in LA.

Outside of cardiac, though? A different story. 

Most people are fine. She’s grabbed lunch with the ortho attendings and had coffees with the peds team, as well as the neuro team. 

Well. Most of the neuro team. Save for one. 

Seeing Dr. Hytes around has been fucking unsettling. The woman broke her heart when they were so young and the sting of the break up is still there, no matter how many girlfriends she’s been through since then. 

Dr. Hytes had been her first real love. And her last, no matter how much of a romantic at heart she remains to this day. 

It seems like the woman has closed off her heart to the world, too, from the way everyone else seems to be intimidated by her. 

“Dr. O’Hara,” Vanessa starts, the other woman nodding after taking a sip of her drink, “what’s the story on Dr. Hytes?” 

“Dr. Hytes? What about her?” 

“What’s she like?” Vanessa knew what Dr. Hytes - Brooke - had been like years and years ago, in undergrad. Soft and vulnerable and learning to believe in herself no matter what her brain was telling her. The Dr. Hytes she’s seen twice now, though, is different. Closed off. 

Also kind of a bitch. 

“Why, you into her too?” Dr. O’Hara’s smile is wry. 

“Not especially.” Vanessa wishes that Dr. Hytes wasn’t here, at the hospital. Bringing up old feelings that she most definitely doesn’t want to deal with while starting a new job. “What do you mean, ‘into her too’?”

“Bit of a ladykiller, that one. I swear she’s turned half of the nurses gay on my floor alone.”

“Okay, first of all, you can’t turn people gay. Doesn’t work like that. Second of all,” Vanessa raises an eyebrow, “go on.” 

“She’s a great lay, apparently. Makes all the women after her go back for more. Not my cup of tea, personally, but Dr. Michaels slept with her once and swore that she came like, four times.” Asia whistles. “Her power.”

Vanessa scoffs. “Clearly you don’t know enough lesbians in your life. Not an outstanding number.” 

Asia shrugs. “Hey, just reporting what I’ve heard. That your cup of tea?” 

Vanessa wrinkles her nose. “Her? Not exactly.”

She had been, years ago. Vanessa knows better now. She’s not going to get burned again. 

Though she wonders how good Dr. Hytes must be now to have so many of the women in the hospital fawning over her. Not that she wants to find out for herself. 

“In or out of the sack, she’s a fucking neurosurgery god. Respect.” Dr. O’Hara points to a picture of Dr. Hytes hanging in the atrium, receiving some sort of award. 

Vanessa has to hold herself back from rolling her eyes. “She really has all of you wrapped around her little finger.” 

Vanessa remembers the Brooke from undergrad, so enamoured by neuro and the way the brain worked. No surprise that she’s become a neurosurgeon - and gotten the overinflated ego that comes with the title. 

She just wishes that Dr. Hytes could do it in a different hospital. Not around her.  

Vanessa is pissed. 

Extremely pissed.  

Sure, she’s been apprehensive about the consult meeting planned with the neuro team for one of their joint patients. Planning an aneurysm clipping for a patient with existing tachycardic issues should be easy, right?

Wrong. 

Not when the main neuro lead is Dr. Hytes, who seems to be determined to undermine everything that she says. 

“We’ll need to address the bloodflow before the clipping, should the patient’s tachycardia become an issue-”

“With all due respect, Dr. Mateo, your method doesn’t seem like a viable option for this patient-”

“Dr. Hytes, I assure you that my experience with this method with multiple patients during my previous practice and various papers written on it is enough to show that it is a viable option-”

“Regardless, this patient is a neuro priority first and foremost, and experimentation with a technique that hasn’t been previously tested at this facility is a rash choice-”

The rest of the meeting is more or less of the same. Not much gets done, not when the two lead attendings on the case spend it verbally sparring. Not that it’s Vanessa’s fault in the least. 

“Dr. Hytes.” Vanessa spits the words at her as soon as they wrap up, storming over to her seat. “May we please speak outside?” 

“What the hell is your problem?” Vanessa hisses the words at Dr. Hytes as soon as they’re in the hallway, watching as her eyes turn stormy as she follows her out into the hallway after leaving the conference room. 

“Your idea is reckless and it isn’t appropriate for this patient. It’s my job to let everyone else know too.” Dr. Hytes looks practically bored. Vanessa has never been more angry. 

“It’s not your job to undermine me in front of colleagues and a patient and their family, so forgive me for not accepting that bullshit.” She’s seething. Absolutely seething. Of course the fucking bitch is trying to make her look unprepared in front of everyone. What else did she expect?

“‘Maybe come prepared with better options and I won’t have to.” Dr. Hytes looks smug, too smug, and Vanessa has to ball her hands into fists to keep herself from doing anything stupid. 

“Look.” Vanessa’s voice is louder now, probably enough to be heard down the hallway, but she doesn’t care. “You don’t know shit about cardiology. Never have, never will. I’m the only reason you never failed the cardio units back in undergrad. So get the fuck off my dick by pretending you know better than I do. Because you don’t.” 

Dr. Hytes’ face turns cold, similar to the way it had been when Dr. West had introduced them on Vanessa’s first day. “You don’t get to talk to me like that.”

“Oh yeah? Says who? Unlike the rest of this hospital, I can see you for who you truly are. And the resulting image? Ugly. Unprofessional. Not as good as you like to think, up there on your high horse.” She spits the words, feeling the anger rise in her chest by the second. 

Dr. Hytes takes a step forward, then another, looking down at her. Vanessa stares right back up at her, refusing to take a step backwards. She’s not one to be intimidated, and not by Dr. Hytes of all people. 

“At least I got into med school on the first try. Because I am as good as I think I am.” Dr. Hytes hisses it at her, low enough so that the small crowd that has gathered around them can’t hear. 

Of course she’d stoop that low. Of course. “Oh, fuck you.” 

Vanessa turns on her heel, storms through the crowd. She’s had it. Had it with cocky surgeons who think that their disciplines are more important and can’t handle the idea of not being the number one priority at all times.

She can’t help but slam the door when she reaches her office, though has to resist the urge to hit her fist on the wall. She blinks back the angry tears threatening to fall. 

Coming to Toronto was supposed to be a good thing. Being back home. Of course one of her ex-girlfriends feels the need to ruin everything for her. 

She’s going to show Dr. Hytes up if it’s the last thing she does.