#while the outline is the same the execution is VERY different from what i had envisioned

[ekingston]

I was gonna be cheeky and ask for 10 and 19 again BUT I shall resist that urge… for now.

I will be sneaky (critical failure) and ask for three (I lied) 28. 30. And 37.

And what the hell, everyone should be proud of their work/s so a 33. (Feel free to pick a couple if this is just asking for a lot - I feel like it is 😅)

I feel like I’m order takeout or reading lotto number here

haha thank you! and the bonus number is…

Any writing advice that works for you and you feel like sharing?

today i’m reminding myself to practice mindfulness! and not in the sense of breathing exercises or lengthy meditation sessions (although I’m sure those have their benefits too) but by making myself be in the present, paying attention to all of my senses, and remembering that my characters would do the same. you’ll need that material to fill in the little details that draw the reader into your work, that tricky thing that makes them feel like they can’t just see it, but like they’re actually there. life is a sensual experience, and i think our stories should reflect that!

Describe a fic that almost happened, but then didn’t.

this got long, so…

i once scribbled down a dream i had that was a sort of trippy time travel/repeating day type of thing, where Lena was part of a small crew of criminals that used Lena’s tech to travel back in time to aid them with their heists. they would simply rewind time over and over, taking note of the details, learning every possible outcome, eliminating obstacles along the way, practicing the motions often enough to nail the final, perfect execution.

the first scene was a very bloody one, and i came in right in the middle of it, not understanding how Lena and her people could be so callous about the people laying bleeding and dying at their feet, especially because Kara was one of them. Lena’s crew just kept saying they’d ‘fix that next time’, like some sort of cryptic mantra.

in the dream Lena ended up looking for Kara in every run through, charming her in a thousand different ways, always the same, Kara falling for her every time. there were a few rewinds that took her back so far that Kara was still a child, immediately smitten but completely lost on earth, abandoned and alone, and Lena lobbied hard to make sure her crew fixed that, too, even when it meant Lena would never meet her again.

i saw Lena’s crew running down a dark alley over and over again, at least one of their crew dead or dying, at least one other gravely hurt. Kara turned out to be the reason their plan failed every single time. Lena ended up having to turn against her team to save her before they could eliminate her from their timeline completely.

in the end Lena lay dying in child-Kara’s arms, telling her ‘we’ll fix it next time.’ this was when she’d finally discovered Kara wasn’t human. the line i woke up with was Lena telling Kara to promise her, ‘if you figure it out someday—fly up’. the theory being, i think, that if Kara somehow were to fly high enough, fast enough, she’d achieve the same effect Lena did with her tech, and Kara could go back to save Lena instead.

my dreams get pretty elaborate, but they rarely come with as tidy of a plot as this one did, so i bet it already exists somewhere.

Do you research before writing or while you write? Is it fun or boring for you?

i don’t feel i write the kind of stuff that requires a lot of research and that’s probably a good thing! because i will go down absolutely every rabbit hole the internet has to offer when i do and zero writing will get done. my longform WIP TFOT has been brewing since—let me check—December 11, 2022 (thanks @mooosicaldreamz) and i’ve written less than 20k words, including my outline. instead i have spent my time working on it ‘studying’ veterinary medicine, learning about sustainable agriculture, planning trips to Wyoming and wondering alongside Paula Cole where all the cowboys have gone.

Give your writing a compliment.

i can’t tell you how happy it makes me when people tell me i managed to write something that made them laugh out loud. several times even! sometimes waking up their loved ones or startling strangers! i love that so much.

[beebfreeb]

I've been working on adding a new section to my website (it is No Pickles themed) and I've got 60 or so new assets to draw... Very scary.

(Long ramble about my website and what I want to do in addition to/after I've finished DIDL)

I have really been wanting to put non-DIDL stuff on my website, I just, erm. All the things that I want to be able to show off are NOT in the state for it yet... Everything is far too underdeveloped for my standards, and a lot of the ideas I have are out of scope of my current skills and would take quite a bit of time and effort that I have been trying to funnel into Daisy. Despite it all.

While hopping around between projects and hastily slapping on new parts is fun and easy, actually sitting down and trimming it into a neat and tidy shape is a different matter.

I want a secondary project to work on so baddd. Yet my options...

Airship: Solid character designs and personalities, 1st half completely outlined, 2nd half fearfully untouched. Unsure on the actual website presentation.

TerriByte: My special little babygirl since middle school but developmentally in the pits of hell. I am unsure of what I want for nearly every aspect of it. Might end it making it entirely text-based.

Criatron: Project dedicated to making an absurd amount of character designs but I want it to be a browser game and I don't understand JS in the slightest.

TMMM: Will be an RPGmaker game but in it's current state it is absolutely overambitious and bloated and needs severe trimming. Also making games is hard and requires a lot of skills I don't have and some I don't think I'll be able to pick up (music, namely).

Wizards: Mostly solid character designs. Vague plot (I know what kicks everything off, I know how I want things to end, I don't know how to get from A to B), I have very strong visuals for how I want the webpage to be designed but lack the skills to execute it (Would have to get good at 3d modeling)

Amalgam: Specifically made with web stuff and multimedia in mind but doesn't have a singular plot as much as a bunch of tangentially related things are happening at once as experienced through wiki-like deepdives and websurfing.

There are other things as well that I don't have quite the same passion for at the moment.

If I could add a second readmore for plot/project summaries I would.

Like, I'm almost tempted to make a summary of everything and my pros and cons of working on it. Make it a PDF. Start polling people on it because of how indecisive I am. But I am also very firm in my Augh I want some of this to be a SURPRISE + I avoid putting anything on the internet if I would be very upset by people doing bad faith internet things to it.

Oh wait wait talking to myself in a Tumblr post has made me remember my plan from last February. TESTFIRE CATALOG! And by that I mean making a bunch of proof of concept demo pages and seeing which ones I like working on the most, and maybe which ones people are most interested in.

There are still a ton of new skills I will have to learn however. I wish I had infinite time and money. Oh well the time will pass anyway.

[zeldurz]

Being a house cat means a lot of time to ponder. I am familiar with your fic as it relates to Pellaeon/Thrawn, henceforth, referred to as Prawn. Lately, I have noticed that you have shifted away from this pairing into unfamiliar territory for me, mainly Firmus Piett/Maximilian Veers & Tiaan Jerjerrod/Conan Antonio Motti. Since I am firmly ensconced in my tiny corner of the fandom, I had to ask around, who are these guys?

Now it’s time to ask you. Welcome to my little corner at the Asker’s Studio™️ (don’t mind the ferocious Mini-Panther🐈‍⬛)

Where I go in the fandoms is determined by where ‘my’ authors go, thus, I often find myself in unfamiliar territory. I got my start with Harry Potter, moved on to Gargoyles, enjoyed a long visit with Thrawn, and currently I happily reside in TNG. As person who merely comments, it’s easy to jump around, but as an author, I would think that it would be more complicated.

What made you decide to branch out to these new pairings/fandom? While they are still Star Wars, I view them far enough away from Thrawn to consider them a different fandom (as it is an enormous departure from the Thrawn universe to the Original Trilogy)

I admit that my only knowledge of your new pairings (newer to your fic) is what Wookeepedia tells me, and what more experienced fandom inhabitants add to that. It makes me want to go back to the OT and watch it through a different lens.

What is it that you would want new readers to know about these ancillary characters?

What characteristics do you admire or dislike about them?

Do you see any parallels to characters that you have written about in the past?

I am behind on my Fic reading, but know that I have been enormously entertained by your Whatever it Takes, and I hope to see additional updates sometime in the near future.

Ahhh thank you for having me back on Asker’s Studio, it’s always a pleasure to be here. I will put this under a cut to make everyone's life a little bit easier

I have indeed shifted my preferences into the adjacent world of OT Imperials, at least for the moment. While I can firmly say that this is all the wonderful @alexx-dax’s fault – since I started following him on tumblr and was left with many similar questions to those you have posed to me: who are these men? How can I tell them apart? Why should I even care? – the question of “why” still remains, and for that, my answer is two-fold.

I would say that the jump from Thrawn to the OT Imps is not as far as it looks on the surface – much of the internal politics and settings aboard a Star Destroyer in Thrawn’s time (be it in Canon before the Battle at Lothal or in Legends aboard the Chimaera) remain the same. This makes it both easier to write (as I already have an idea of The Empire and how it operates) and easier to integrate characters that are still very near and dear to my heart – in fact, while I have yet to make full use of it in a fic, the fact that Grand Admiral Thrawn was the one that recommended a then Corporal Veers to Darth Vader for his Death Squadron has a lot of room for potential. I also think it helps that the Imps have a much less wide-reaching fandom – there’s a very small, very enthusiastic community that has made me feel very welcome as I undertake my studies into Background Men, and I really appreciate that.

Without going into too much detail, I would also be remiss if I did not touch on the issue of Writer Burnout and how that has contributed to my step away from writing Thrawn. I have the curse of non-functioning executives (aka ADHD/autism), and writing something that isn’t the topic du jour is a painful and tedious process for me (astute readers will also recognize this is why I rarely do outlines/planning and why I almost never edit/proofread my fics before posting them). For every fic that reaches AO3, there are 8-10 more that are half finished on my google drive, and I tend to lose creative steam on things very, very quickly. Between a bunch of stuff IRL and the rise of people discussing Thrawn and his characterization in fandom spaces(1), I’m having a very hard time getting my ‘voice’ for Thrawn back (it doesn’t help that my largest and most popular fic has spiraled into something much, much larger than I had originally planned, and I’m very much struggling to figure out how to tie it off in a satisfying way lol).

But back to these new guys. Who are they and why should you care?

First of all, if you wish to join me in my corner with my dolls, I would actually recommend watching the OT again but considering the perspectives of the Imps – in particular, Ken Colley’s portrayal of Piett in Empire Strikes back and Michael Pennington’s Jerjerrod in Return of the Jedi(2) give a lot of depth to the characters that we often just see as “bad guy henchmen”. People have written many things about these characters over the years (some of which I agree with and some of which I do not), but I always come back to Piett’s expression as he watches Admiral Ozzel choke to death beside him; these characters are Imperials, yes, but they are not all Tarkin or Palpatine – that is, they are not simply evil for the sake of being evil. Veteran Thrawn fans will know that writing from the perspective of the antagonists can be a lot of fun – and for my brand of fic (ie the hurt/comfort), there are a lot of Rebel Victories that bring pain that’s worth exploring (not unlike Bilbringi in the HTTE Trilogy).

I have spoken a lot about the Imperials as a collective, so now it’s time to get into the individuals. While I will touch a little bit on my favourite ships (Piett/Veers and Motti/Jerjerrod), I think that another fun part about writing these particular characters is that they work well in many different pairings, depending on the vibe you’re going for (I will spare you the chart, but I do have one). Anyway, without further ado and in no particular order, the incomplete summary of Imps:

Firmus Piett (ESB, ROTJ):

Piett is the character that got me hooked on the imperials in the first place – his “goddammit I’m just trying to do my job and not get murdered” energy combined with his otherness (in that unlike most other high-ranking officers, he is neither from a core world nor upper class). His days fighting in the Axxilian anti-pirate fleet only add to this vibe, and much of his characterization (that I go off of, anyway) centers around him being scrappy and resourceful – useful where other, snobbier officers might not be.

As with all things Fanfiction and particularly with the Imperials (as there is comparatively little material to work with), there will always be flavours of characters depending on who is writing them, but I enjoy Piett’s potential for a found family, along with his biting snark and ability to survive only on caf and spite.

Maximilian Veers (ESB):

Veers has the distinction of being in the Imperial Army, rather than the Navy, which automatically gives him a different flavour than the others. It’s my understanding that there’s a rivalry between the Army and the Navy, which lends itself well to a back and forth banter that is easily one of my favourite things in an Imp fic. Veers is also the strong and stoic character – he’s not intimidated by Vader, and he’s going to do his damn job, no matter what.

I’m a big sap for the “hard on the outside soft on the inside” trope, and Veers is perfect for this. He protects his Herd with a fierce loyalty, and is a proven competent leader, but he’s also the sort of guy who teases his partner and loves physical affection. Veers is a giant, blond puppy, and I love that about him. His vibe works especially well with Piett, since they have the whole "tol and smol"/Army-Navy/slowly opening up to one another vibe that I love.

Tiaan Jerjerrod (ROTJ):

Listed as a “cold technocrat” on every official description, Tiaan is another one of those characters that has many layers to him. He is the rich snob from the core, but he’s also an extremely competent engineer who was hand picked to handle some of the Empire’s biggest projects. He’s also comparatively young (a full fifteen years younger than Pellaeon, and ten years younger than Veers, if Wookieepedia is to be believed), and yet has made his way to the top of the top. Tiaan also has the distinction that (at least in the deleted scenes) we see him hesitate – even when given an order, he is conflicted about firing the Death Star II at Endor, given the number of Imperials still on the moon.

Tiaan is usually characterized as being neurotic and anxious – a sort of wet-cat energy that contrasts well with the competence he is known for. His background – a rich aristocrat coming from a long line of decorated Naval Officers from a conservative planet – only adds to this effect, and I’m a big fan of stories that explore how he navigates (or doesn’t) the enormous pressures he faces.

Conan Antonio Motti (ANH):

Loud, Obnoxious, and American, Motti stands out among the Joint Chiefs in the one scene he is in. He has the balls to challenge Vader, and the gusto to back it up – he’s also quite young, having risen to be commander of the DS-I in his early 30s (based on his actor’s age, Wookieepedia does not have a birthday for him). While there are scant few other canon appearances for him, it’s also worth noting that one of them is him writing a letter to HR regarding Vader’s Force Choke, and another is a passage from the Death Star Novel about how he works out in only a speed-strap juggling balls in heavy gravity.

Motti can be summed up as the “Go Big or Go Home” guy who is crass, loud, and gets in everyone’s face. He can be a lot of fun to read and write because he’s so obnoxious, and that makes him fun to include even if the story is primarily about someone else. He pairs well with Jerjerrod because they have similar backstories (young, wealthy) but wildly different personalities, although I have been enjoying the Motti-Thrawn friendship lately (that would give Pellaeon a migraine)

Overall, each of these characters (and Captain Lorth Needa, of course, everyone’s favourite Dad Friend and holder of the single brain cell) has a unique vibe that they bring to the table, and it’s fun to see how they interact with both each other and the Situations they find themselves in. I also find them to be very relatable – every author pours a little bit of their heart and soul into the characters they write, but for me personally, there is a lot I can draw from my own experiences (not unlike how I have written a very few very personal Thrawn fics).

With that being said, I do struggle sometimes to hit the right notes and strike a balance between “canon”, “fanon” and the story I want to tell. While Thrawn has (for the most part) been consistently written and it is easy enough to see a through-line for his story, that is absolutely not the case here. There are many examples I could speak to (Needa as “ruthless”, Veers refusing prosthetics due to stigma or Jerjerrod “loving war”), but for the sake of brevity I will only touch on one: Piett as a schemer who sought to deliberately have Ozzel killed.

While this is… an interpretation of the source material (IE Empire Strikes Back) and has since been made canon by From Another Point of View, it disregards the intentions of Ken Colley in playing the character. He wanted Piett to come off as more relatable to the audience, to give depth to the Empire as more than just a faceless monolith, and I would argue that he is quite successful in doing so(3). Undermining this (and his backstory notes about being an underdog within the Empire) take away some of the aspects of his character that I really enjoy – but does it make my Piett OOC if he wouldn’t do something like that? Does it matter?

Anyway almost two thousand words and three footnotes, it’s very much time for me to wrap this up (as bad as I am at writing endings). Suffice it to say that I find the Imps to be an excellent sandbox with which to play in, and I appreciate both the time you’ve taken to ask me about them and the time it’s taken to read through this essay of sorts.

I’m hoping I’ll get back to Whatever it Takes sooner or later, but I would rather wait for inspiration to strike me than to keep beating my head against a metaphorical wall until an ending falls out. Until next time, thank you again for the ask and all the wonderful comments you have left for me 😊

(1)I should note that this isn’t targeted at any group in particular and isn’t meant to be a negative statement – just that the Thrawn fandom continues to grow, and with the upcoming Ashoka Show, there are a lot of people with a lot of different opinions about the character, and for someone who isn’t particularly adept at navigating the sea of fandom, it can be extremely overwhelming.

(2)If you are able to watch the deleted scenes from ROTJ, that’s even better – there are some excellent Jerjerrod scenes that did not make the final cut

(3)I do own two Piett action figures and haven’t read Another Point of View yet, so I could be a little bit biased

[therhythmafterthesummer]

Rhythm posting any writing: enjoy! :)

Me: ah shit here we go again *rereads the whole work from the beginning with all the additional scenes*

I love your writing style sooooo much, it feels like a mug of hot tea on a cold autumn evening while sitting in your favourite armchair, blanket on, petting your purring cat. Such warmth and comfort just from the words on the screen!

I always wonder, how do you choose what story to continue? You have some unfinished stories, do you just go with whatever you feel like writing or choose the one that you decided you need to update before writing something else? Do you have any rituals before writing, like making tea in a special cup? A playlist? What does your writing process look like? I'm so curious about it! ~🖤

hahahahhaha ngl, that first comment made me chuckle. and then i almost cried with that second paragraph. makes me really happy that you perceive my writing that way.

i wish i had a system that helped me tackle my long list of wips, but honestly i just go with whatever my goblin brain desires. which is, unfortunately, not very efficient lol.

the way my creative process had "worked" so far is that i hyperfixate on a concept/scene and that just gave me enough energy/brainpower to keep me working on something. that method isn't working anymore, and i'm struggling heavily with executive dysfunction (which has been affecting other parts of my life besides my beloved hobbies, but that's a different matter).

technically i do have like a priority list (recently, i try to not have more than three WIPs in that list. everything else is put on pause) and i jump from one work to the other depending on what the little lizard that controls my brain wants to work on. i've been writing, just very little on different projects at a time, so it's sloooowwww, but at least it's something!

i def would like to find something that could help me keep the habit, but at the same time i kinda feel like i can't really force it, so idk 🤷‍♀️

also, i don't think i've got any rituals 🤔 i prefer to write in silence as that allows me to immerse in the scene i might be working on, but sometimes if my thoughts are too chaotic, i do play some background music. i can't listen to people speak/sing and write at the same time, so usually when i do that i go for videogame osts that either fit the vibe of the fic or that are my comfort games (catch me listening to the entire twilight princess soundtrack while trying to write something just because it calms me down lol).

something that has kinda worked for me and has allowed me to write those few words i've written these past few months, it's having two separate documents for the same work.

one of the docs just has ideas, outlines, detached scenes, scenes out of order, and it's just overall a chaotic mess. then there's the "clean" doc, where the story is being written in order and more "polished". i used to just have everything in a single doc, but the chaos was messing up with my head, so i found that having that clean version helped me keep the flow. i work with a dual window set-up, with the messy doc on the left and the clean one on the right. dunno why, it just gives me a bit more peace lol

lately, i've kinda wondered if i should take my laptop somewhere that isn't my home and try to write, or if i should find a new place to sit specifically to write, but i haven't really done anything tbh. i'm always just on the sofa, keeping that pristine shrimp posture and hoping for the best lol (don't be like me. i'm in pain constantly because i just can't sit normally)

this is probably unnecessarily long, but i already typed it, so it's staying 🤭🤭🤭

[tamelee]

What do you think of Kishimoto as a writer?

Oh. Well.. allow me.

I'm not a writer myself so I feel like I am in no position to say anything regarding him as a writer specifically. But I'm studying to become a storyteller partly because of Kishimoto. As a writer your tools are limited no matter the amount of creativity you have. Imagine a blank page and a pencil. How do you get from an idea to the story that is 'Naruto'? A Manga where he for the most part had to be his own director, storyteller, storyboard-artist, artist, plotter, scriptwriter, character designer, researcher, special effects artist, tone worker- you name it.

But of course, that's not to discredit Kazisa, Takahashi, Yahagi and Ikemoto who assisted him. Or the editors at Weekly Shonen Jump who helped Kishimoto outline his story to what it is today.

Outlines often get rejected and many of Kishimoto's ideas/original plans did too.

I'm glad as well because some of them I don't think were as strong. Neither were some ideas for example a sketch of Sasuke's original introduction compared to what we have in Chapter 3 now. This fits his character way better and even though I'm often complaining about Naruto's ending (as we all should tbh,) the editors of SJ know their target audience best. That doesn't mean that every story or decision succeeds.. but it does mean there is a structure that generally works. A golden way for Shonen Manga. (Ki-Sho-Ten-Ketsu). One that Kishimoto often struggled with not just 'Naruto' but in general I think because he explained that no matter how many ideas he had for an adventurous story, he never got any green lights. He decided to go for a sports theme and sketched out a baseball Manga.

And it's very apparent in many excerpts when he says that the editors were pushing him a lot towards entertainment, that Kishimoto himself embraced elements of realism and more serious topics himself that weren't necessarily suited for Shonen.

(Side-note: Shonen is not really a 'genre'. Also, the difference between Shonen en Seinen depends on the way it's written. Rating or themes does not classify a story as either one by itself although Shonen is targeted at a younger audience and therefore its plot should generally be more easy to understand within a wider audience group. Often the stories are focussed on external conflicts while Seinen expands a lot on psychological struggles. Even if you were to tell the same story separately it can still be the same story- just executed differently, therefore it's not really a "genre" but a demographic. That's what I mean when I say "I wish 'Naruto' would've gotten a Seinen sequel." It's not about the story being more "mature" as some believe.)

But... even though that all is true for 'Naruto' and its world focusses a lot on external struggles of being a Ninja in it's incredibly adventurous Shinobi-world, Kishimoto didn't shy away from making it a very character-driven story as well. A story where partly, Naruto and Sasuke as our main-act, with their internal conflicts till this day, are somewhat hidden away from that very same demographic even though their feelings are in plain sight. Why? Because it isn't suited for them and certainly not that easy to understand. If you've come across posts here that say "omigod how can you not understand this simple thing? 🙄" regarding something in the story then I'm here to tell you that they probably also didn't the first time they read it, unless they have some media/literacy-experience or something similar. In which case I admire them, but also, don't worry- you're not alone and it's pretty normal.

There's a reason Kishimoto had to fight his own staff so hard to get certain scenes through. (For example his reverse Harem no Jutsu.) And seeing him say that he felt pressured a lot makes me sad but it's understandable because I think what mattered to him at some points through storytelling would've become too complicated for SJ's audience. I can't imagine his own internal battle having fought solitude and rejection himself but then hunching over a desk for 15+ years, immersed in doing what he loves only for him to most likely not be satisfied with the ending. In fact, I'm pretty sure as that last Chapter felt painful. Like a bucket of icy water slapped in your face on your way out.

Hehe. Well, he did.

As him being a Mangaka and creator of stories, I genuinely respect Kishimoto so much. There's a reason why people in the industry call him Kishimoto-sensei. A teacher and master of his craft. It shows in his work and most of all his art.

I mean.. how can you not respect that?? Honestly I could go on and on but I'd be writing entire essays. The writing process itself is complicated, people are involved, editors, but I think he was able to show very well why 'Naruto' at least meant a lot to him and why he wanted to create it. I'm glad he was able to push his ideas through.. despite SJ's demographics in his own way and I can only hope that one day he would have it in him to create a satisfying resolution regardless of anything else. He and the fandom deserve it. But I can only hope. Oh! I love his other stories too actually but, I'm not sure if you're asking about that.

[ducktracy]

how do you start a storyboard? what’s the difference between thumbnail sketches and rough sketches? i wanna learn, but i’m so lost

GOOD QUESTION I AM HAPPY YOU ASKED!! as with all of my explanations, this’ll be long winded but i hope it helps!

so YES! thumbnails are usually first! it depends on how you’re approaching the board. are you working off of a script/written list of ideas? are you just starting completely blank?

i usually try to start with some form of writing down, just because i’m flighty and don’t want to miss any potential ideas in the rush of the process. i’m going to use a personal board i started for fun as an example (and as an incentive to pick it back up, because it said i last opened the file in August, so…)

usually if i’m doing a personal board, i’ll have an outline written of the basic actions i want. nothing too thorough, just “so and so does this” “action for this panel” “so and so does that” etc. this one is timed to music, which is a special case—i REALLY didn’t want to lose the ideas i had, and trying to recite those and keep the beat of the music at the same time got overwhelming and i didn’t think a sheet of thumbnail drawings would help maintain the authenticity in time, if that makes sense. so what i did was type very vague descriptions in each panel, with the panels timed to the music so i knew what to fill in later. i’ve rehearsed the actions enough in my head that i have an idea of what i want, so when i see “camera pans past Porky” i immediately know we’re going to follow Daffy out, i can see Porky encircling him as he catches up in perspective with the camera (enter foreground, exit foreground, Daffy tracks him the whole time while he walks), etc etc I CAN SEE IT. so i have a jumping off point for my thumbs

there were some actions more reliant on the music than usual, so i scribbled them out as crudely and quickly as possible to not only not lose the idea, but see if it works. the water splashes are “animated” in comparison to everything else, but that was mainly to see how the execution would work—is the overlap cluttered or natural? will i have enough time for each beat? i can already tell that i want to move the splashes back as the camera catches up so it doesn’t tangent off screen. that’ll be all fixed later during clean-up—right now i’m just focused on getting the ideas down and sketching out what i have a clearest idea of first. that’s also why there’s a jump of white before Porky and Daffy themselves—i know i’m going to have Daffy come up to Porky from behind, but not exactly sure how i want to stage it yet. fly down in a down shot? follow Daffy from an eye level view? those aren’t pressing matters right now, and i feel i’ll get more clarity with that later once i carve everything out. as such, i just skip it and go to what i have in mind. that’s also why Porky is missing for the last few frames; i needed to envision Daffy’s acting more and see if the staging allowed room for his broad actions. i’ll squeeze Porky in later. BUT. to answer your question more directly, thumbs are usually the blueprint of the blueprint. they’re meant to be crude, ugly, scribbly, NOT DETAILED. they’re meant purely to convey ideas and thoughts, which will be expanded upon later with the roughs. some people like to draw thumbs directly into their boards—i like to open a program like MS Paint (or even just the margins in SBPro) that is as simple as possible so i can focus purely on what i need to. much of it is acting, but sometimes staging is a priority, which i’ll indicate in a box. it is never perfect/completely accurate, but that’s again what the roughs are for. here are a few examples of how i thumbnail—there isn’t a right or wrong way to do it! i just like to have it all in one place so i can check back periodically, i get cold feet if i put my thumbnails directly in every panel. feels like jumping in too quick, i like to work my way up from there

and let me be clear that you can go straight to clean up if you’re comfortable! i know and work with people who go straight from thumbs to clean, and i envy them GREATLY. i’ll sometimes have two different versions of a rough if i’m having trouble getting an idea across—i need to ruminate with the drawings a bit more and generally feel more at ease through the general progression, but it’s all a matter of how you work

and really, it’s just clean up from there! cleaning up the characters, backgrounds, adding inbetweens if necessary for the demands of the board… and after i’m done cleaning, i’ll take care of any housekeeping such as adding white mattes to the characters so they don’t blend in with the BG and checking to make sure the sizes are consistent with each other. (i really only do the latter for professional work, as my personal storyboards are a bit looser and a little more lax) this is a bit of a crude explanation because storyboarding is so subjective of a practice and everyone does it differently. ideally, initial thumbnail drawings would just BE the storyboards, with all the fancy clean up left to layout! but that’s another story… and one that’s futile to bring up seeing as these are for personal use anyway HAHA. but i just like to work my way up and sort of see where the storyboard and the characters take me

[recurring-polynya]

Congrats on 15k followers!

Between Tides is probably my favorite fic of yours, and I'd love to hear what different takes you had for the cover backstory.

Between Tides was the first really long fic I ever wrote, and I had not yet developed my current outlining system. Suffice it to say, I did not have the "mystery" part of the plot very well determined in my head when I started. There were originally a couple more important characters that got cut, and part way through the story, Renji was supposed to get a part-time job teaching at a martial arts dojo (for plot reasons), and the original cover story was related to that. I guess I probably had to rewrite it when I junked that subplot. I had legitimately forgotten about this until I was looking through my notes. I have to say, it is astonishing how well the plot-plot of Between Tides hangs together, given the extremely seat-of-my-pants manner in which it was written.

Also, here's another fun fact that I had forgotten until I found it in there: the name Satonaka came from the main character of the film After Life, a movie about a counseling center for the recently dead . I watched it in my college Japanese film course and it permanently rewired my brain. It was out of print for a long time, but I just now found out that it was re-released by the Criterion Collection in 2021 and guess what this bitch will be doing with her 7-day free trial?

Enough of that. Here is the OG Satonaka teen love drama. I am warning you now that this is super-duper unedited and I'm kind of embarrassed about it, but I love you all very much, so I am letting you look at it anyway.

🌊 🌊 🌊

Fortunately, Rukia had now been doing this long enough that she was starting to be given tasks that she had done before. The sensation of responding “I just emailed it to you!” or “Check the printer!” every time her boss demanded something held some of the same satisfaction as a well-executed squad maneuver. 

Unfortunately, this also meant that when the afternoon rolled around, Sunadori crashed extra hard. She moved her chair over to Rukia’s desk, and sat, leaned over, with her cheek on Rukia’s blotter.

Rukia wasn’t sure, but she thought they might be best friends now.

“I think I want to get back together with Haruta,” she sighed despondently.

“Hmmm,” Rukia replied. “Are there... pros and cons?”

“Did I mention we dated for a while? When we were much younger?”

“I could tell.”

“You could tell?”

“It’s...a common scenario,” Rukia hedged, glancing at the photo of Takeru on her desk.

“He was so angry about his dad’s death,” Sunadori sighed. “And it was like he blamed me. I couldn’t be around him. But he seems different now that he’s back from college. Everyone’s really sick of him talking about his aikido class, but I think it’s really helped him find himself.”

“Hmmm,” Rukia repeated. She was pretty sure this conversation was not generally appropriate for a Living World employment situation. On the other hand, she needed to get more intel on Oga, and this seemed like a really prime opportunity. Also, in the grand scheme of inappropriate captain-lieutenant dynamics she had heard stories about, this didn’t even merit an eyeblink.

“Mr. Satonaka seems very nice. I’m sure you two had a fairy-tale romance.” Sunadori stared at his photo wistfully. She was obviously an oversharer to start with, and for some reason, she was already weirdly invested in her employee’s love life. Rukia decided to throw out some bait.

She blew all the air out of her cheeks. “Hardly. It’s a long, stupid story, it wouldn’t be appropriate for work.”

Sunadori sat up sharply. Hook, line, and sinker. “It’s the week before New Year’s, no one gets anything done anyway. Tell me everything.”

It might seem counterintuitive for Rukia to tell Sunadori a long story when what she really wanted was for Sunadori to tell *her* things. But that wasn’t the way these things worked. She would share a long, juicy story, and then Sunadori would tell her more than she wanted to know, probably forever.

Also, Rukia was really quite fond of the romance manga backstory she and Renji had made up. He’d gotten to pull it out a few times, but she hadn’t, yet. She was really looking forward to telling the whole thing to Orihime when this was all over. Well, here was her big chance.

“Are you sure you want to hear this?”

Sunadori stared at her. “Stop stalling.”

“Okay, well, so, I took martial arts as kid. Our neighbors ran a dojo, an old family school, similar to jujutsu. I took it pretty seriously, marched through the belts, had a room full of trophies. When I was old enough, I started helping with the beginner classes to help pay for my own. I think I was fourteen when Takeru started coming, he would have been thirteen. He was taller than everyone in his class by a head, and he was terrible. Most of the beginners were little. I mean, you can start at any age, it’s just rarer. Anyway, Numata-sensei had me work with him one-on-one so he could get the basics down and move to a group with people closer to his own age. I was really worried that he was gonna be a jerk about having a short girl teach him this stuff, but he was actually very polite, and a good listener, and he started getting better.

“We ended up talking a lot, and it turned out that he didn’t have a very nice family life, and he’d been getting into trouble a lot at school, which is why his mom put him in martial arts. I lived right down the street from the dojo, and I guess he just started coming by after class, and the next thing I knew, he was just at my house all the time.

“For a long time, I thought he liked being around my family as much as he liked being around me. My mom made him sweets all the time, which she wouldn’t make for us. My dad called him ‘sport’. I have an older brother and he’s just a total stiff. He was the captain of the football team and the top student and has had his entire career planned out since he was 8 years old, and Takeru just idolized him.”

“Where’s your brother now?” Sunadori asked hopefully.

“He’s a banker in Tokyo,” Rukia replied. 

“Married?”

“Only to his work. But he’s super married to his work. Would you rather hear about him?”

Sunadori flapped one hand. “No, you can get back to the story.”

Rukia sighed and hunched her shoulders. “This went on for a couple of years. Takeru was getting really good at jujutsu. Not as good as me, but we were competing at the same level, and sparring all the time. We went to regionals the year I was 16, and dominated so badly that the championship round was between me and him.” Rukia’s face went stiff. Acting. “He beat me. He knew my moves so well that he had worked out a counter-offense that he was saving until he had to face me in competition.” Renji had made up this entire part and refused all edits of it. “Afterwards, he insisted on walking me home, even though I wouldn’t speak to him, and he stopped me out in front of my house, and told me that now that he had defeated me, he felt like he could finally ask me if I would be his girlfriend.”

 Sunadori gasped.

“It was really lame,” Rukia editorialized. “It was terrible. The worst.”

“You said yes, though? Right? Please tell me you said yes.”

“Yeah, of course I did. I was 16.”

Sunadori sighed, completely taken in. Point Renji.

“Anyway, we dated for a year or so, and then his dad, who was barely there to begin with, skipped out completely. He fell apart.” She frowned. “I tried to be there for him, but I was in my senior year, dealing with exams and college entrances, and I don’t think I realized how badly he was spiraling. Takeru dropped out of school, he said he needed to get a job to help his mom. Except he didn’t, he-- y’know, I don’t want to go into the details. My family, his mom, Sensei, our friends-- we all tried to help him, and he pushed us away. My brother was off at college in Tokyo at that time, and he called up Takeru and reamed him out, which let me tell you, was not helpful. Finally, I told him that I couldn’t be with him anymore. Then I moved away to college and blocked his number, as if he was ever going to call me again.”

Sunadori looked downright misty.

“You had to do the same with Oga?” Rukia asked, grimly.

Sunadori shrugged. “Oga never… got in any real trouble. He was just… mean. Hurtful.”

Rukia nodded. “Takeru had been in and out of trouble the whole time we were together. I never saw that side of him, he hid it pretty well. When we were apart, I told myself that he had lied to me, that he’d never been as good as I thought. But people are complicated, you know? And I dated a few other guys, and I knew none of them were as good as Takeru’s good side."

She took a deep breath. The next part was going to call for some fake tears, which was actually one of Rukia’s specialties.  “So, I was home for New Year’s my senior year of college, and Takeru’s mom comes by. I guess she and my mom had kept in contact, although my mom had never mentioned it. She told me that the summer I left for school, he had enlisted in the JGSDF, and that there had been an accident-- I mean, it wasn’t an accident, it was an IED-- but he was in the hospital. He was going to live, but he they weren’t sure he was going to keep the leg.” One tear, sniff, wipe it away with the heel of her hand.

Sunadori looked downright stricken.

“I mean, he had been a downright rat-bastard, but we had some good times, too, and his mom said he had cleaned himself up a lot, so I thought, maybe I’ll write him a letter. The guy’s in the hospital, may end up with a prosthesis, the least I can do is send him a get-well card. I sat down and wrote him a twelve page letter. I didn’t know I still had twelve pages of feelings left for him. I stuffed that in my desk, and got him a card from the drug store instead. I felt bad after I sent it, so I wrote him a one-page letter of the absolute blandest nothing, and sent that to him. And he wrote back.”

“What did he say?” Sunadori asked breathlessly.

“It wasn’t very long. Thanks for writing mostly. That he hoped I was well. There was nothing in it that indicated he wanted anything from me or expected anything of me.” She frowned. “It broke my heart. So I wrote him a longer letter, just nice things, happy things, things that I remembered would make him smile. And he wrote back to that, too, and then we started texting, and calling. His leg got better. I was back at school, finishing up my last semester, when they let him go home, to his mom’s. I took the train home that weekend, just to see him. I didn’t tell him I was coming.”

“Oh, how romantic! What did he say when he saw you?”

“Well, here’s the thing. You should tell people when you’re visiting them, especially when they’re just out of the hospital. He looked terrible and he was in a lot of pain, and I think he was a little embarrassed. But that’s when I really knew that he had changed. Because through all that pain, he was so careful with everything he said and so gentle, all he cared about was that he didn’t accidentally push me away again. At the end of the weekend, he made me promise that I wouldn’t let him distract me from school and that I would have a strong finish.”

“Mmm, I would have been distracted.”

Rukia’s brows creased. “Ma’am, I assure you I worked very hard on all my coursework, and am a very qualified employee.”

Sunadori rolled her eyes. “You already have the job, get on with it.”

“Well, the job market was pretty tight, and my dad knew someone who needed some part time office help, so I moved back home after graduation. I found out that Takeru’s mom was too busy to get him to PT most of the time, which was downright stupid, since it was basically a miracle that he kept the leg at all. So I started driving him around and at first it was just making sure he made it to all his appointments, and helping him with his veterans affairs paperwork, and then we were just always together again.”

[oonajaeadira]

Adira!!! For the end of the year ask I wanna ask you...

F. What stories are you planning for the future?

N. Anything you were planning to write that never got written?

T. Themes, motherfucker, do you have them? What are they?

💜

Hello, my sweet Rae!!! Sorry it's so late, I got swept up in chatting with some pals I haven't talked to in a while and they had a new puppy and before I knew it it was midnight. BUT THERE WAS A PUPPY. A PUPPY, RAE. You understand.

.

F. What stories are you planning for the future?

Sooooooo many. I mean, I'm doing a Year of Tropes, so there's 12 at least! A/B/O Javi G is coming in January, there's a Tovar trope fic set for February, and probably Javier for March. I'm keeping the tropes close to the chest, but I hope you'll like them!!!

I have the end of I'll Never Fall In Love Again ready to write. That was supposed to be two more chapters, but I covered enough in the most recent chapter that it may only end up being one more. Or one and an epilogue. (Exciting tidbit is that I just commissioned a piece of art for it--for the final scene specifically! I told the artist that she could dress Dieter and Cakes any way she wanted that fit the scene and I'd write it in. I can't wait to see what she creates for it!)

I'll keep writing Losing My Religion and Sweets Series for sure. I may be wrapping up Pats very soon though; I have another big chapter planned and that may be where I leave them for a while.

I may be continuing my Tarot reader Oberyn story...it has a rough outline, I keep playing with it, but I guarantee it would get really weird...

I'd like to take Light Only Shows You Where the Shadows Are (Max Phillips) further. I’m rather proud of this one. I absolutely loved playing with making Max both very unsettling/dangerous and very protective/soft at the same time and wonder if I can continue that. I like very still, very quiet horror and don't get to play with that enough here.

And my brain just came up with an idea for Joel. It's not an earth-shattering idea, but the format would be completely different than what I usually write. It's not a media fic or anything at all like you're doing, but I do take some inspiration from your Formula 1 fic and your bold format shake up. I've been wanting to do something that is challenging in execution but freeing in structure, if that makes any sense. And it's different enough that I don't know if anyone will read it. (I'd still write it if I really loved it though.) But. I'm going to wait for the series to come along. I'd rather write for Pedro's Joel than Troy's. Start fresh. With a Pedro face!

I may also have some soft series ideas for Frankie and Javier...but we'll see what happens with the other boys first.

.

N. Anything you were planning to write that never got written?

I had a series set in Salem with Ezra that was inspired by my trip there a year ago. It's completely outlined and could still happen...but I didn't get to it this year. 2023 may be the year I return to Ezra!!!!

.

T. Themes, motherfucker, do you have them? What are they?

The theme, my good lady, is soft, dammit. The theme is yearning and love and romance. The theme is working on your own faults and insecurities in order to love yourself and your person better. The theme is trust and communication and understanding. The theme is suffering through just enough angst to pop your heart open like a chestnut so you can get to all the sweetness inside. The theme is Pedro boys, but marinated in butter and sugar, gooey, sweet, with just a dash of spice, but meant to be a very nice indulgence. The theme is I WRITE WHAT I WANT AND I HOPE YOU HAVE FUN TOO.

.

<3

End of year asks!

[sbbreflections]

LEVITICUS

3. Leviticus

The Lord, through Moses, further solidifies His relationship and covenant with the Israelites, and outlines His list of non-negotiable rules - along with blessings for those who obey, and punishments for those who would disobey Him. It is a call to Holy Living through choice and action.

This is the book where proper practices for making Holy Sacrifices and Offerings to God are detailed. A major thing of note that casts a sort of shadow on Leviticus is the “Sin Offering” which at the time needed to be done on occasion of specified sin as well as on a yearly ritualistic basis to cleanse the people. If I understand correctly, this particular offering practice would become obsolete when Jesus was crucified and died for our sins.*

Also defined are:

1. Clean and Unclean Animals (which should and should not be eaten/touched),

2. Particular Purification Rituals,

3. Prohibitions regarding Sexual Practices and the handling of Blood, and

4. Personal Holiness/Conduct (how one sets themselves apart as “holy” and in reverence to The Most High) {Leviticus 19}

Some of the ordinances set in this chapter had not been mentioned previously and that means to me that God was capable of not only creation and destruction, but also of awareness and modification. It’s almost as if he utilized the SWOT analysis after each Human Hiccup. I believe that the Lord set these laws with the Israelites as a continued test of faith and loyalty to Him. “Before we go any further, hear me and hear me well.” I mean, yes He would want to see his children prosper, but He didn’t mind executing with fury, as well. If His people could rebuke the sins of those who they lived with before, and refuse the sins of those who they would come into contact with BECAUSE GOD SAID, they would of course find favor in His eyes.

Think in Morgan Freeman’s epic voice: “I have saved these {people} and given them food, water and protection. Still, they are capable of doing what they want because I have also given them free-will. I give them what they need, and still, they consistently find new ways to defy me - even after I tell them what should not be done and what will happen if they do… when I show them my Glory, they fear me awhile and turn back to their wits soon enough. They are either brave or stupid. But at least if I tell them *everything* they need to know not to do, their punishments (or rewards) would be justified. They will worship me, for I am the Lord their God, or they will perish.”

I’m not mocking The Lord at all, I assure you. I like movies and this is how I imagined he may have felt during the times. I do pray this is not offensive to anyone who matters.

I can fully understand how this chapter (the one that basically calls most of us all Sinners) could be a trigger for most people in the world today - it is where [who we are] and [what we do] that would have undeniably disappointed our Father in Heaven is written plainly and lives forever. It is where our devilish neighbors pull a line from to demonize the next sinner. While some of the information is outdated and/or simply irrelevant for modern day Christians*, other parts do give us a first glance at right and wrong in the eyes of TMH (and those who walk with Him). And so, it is a very important book to familiarize yourself with if you want to be “good” in the general sense of the word. Because of Jesus’ crucification, we experience wrath and reward much differently from what is written here - as in, punishments are not carried out the same as they were anymore, and some of these regulations no longer apply.

Be wise. Use discernment.

Numbers is next.

Originally post dated February 21, 2024.

Written x SP

[norinenglish]

If I may- what did you do in planning for The Canary of the Black Mines? Because I always end up planning out fics and then never execute on the plan I’ve set out for myself. I hope you have a nice day!

Well, I've had a few methods over the years. For this fic (and all my ranchers/traffic fics) I work mostly online. I started with a word document where I put my notes. The notes are constantly evolving. At first, it was just a basic outline. I mentioned in a previous post that The Canary of the Black Mines was supposed to be 3 chapters long, so I had the main event of those three parts.

It is very important that you have your starting point and also the end in mind. Having an interesting premise is easy, but moving on from there is difficult. Where do you want to take this story? For that, what do your characters need to go through, to accomplish or how do they need to evolve? If you have your goal in mind, then it's easier to continue writing.

I usually like to have everything written before posting, but this time I've decided to post the beginning of it (to celebrate DO2 opening.) I had a few things written in advance to not have to stare at a blank page, but I also fed on the feedback I got from the readers. Having a base, as thin as it can be, is priceless to avoid writer's block.

Every time I envisioned a scene I thought was cool, I put it in the notes, trying to put them in order of when I wanted the moments to happen. It's very important! If you don't write it out somewhere then you're going to forget and then be frustrated you cannot find what that wonderful idea was. But also, don't hesitate to delete and/or change things you had planned. (I had scenes with different hermits coming to work on DO2, with Scar visiting and False building the portal. False didn't end up appearing in the story, but Grian did! I did not plan for Grian. In fact, he was only supposed to come into play in the next chapter! But he imposed himself earlier by the force of the narrative - I think for the better.)

I work on a platform I can access from my phone too, even if I prefer to write on my computer. That way, if I'm inspired when I'm not at home, I can note it down and come back to it later. If I feel stuck, I force myself to write basic ideas while commuting for example. Anything to make any progress.

Lastly, I think it's important that you want to read your story. If you are curious about what is going to happen, you are going to read it. You are your first reader! And god knows you're gonna have to read and re-read your work to make it great, so you might as well enjoy it! Don't write things you're not interested in.If you need, get help. An outside opinion. IRL or from online ppl. It helped me greatly!

That was a very interesting question, thank you for asking it. Hope that helps you! (Also, I did have a nice day. Your question made me smile and consider. Hope my answer does the same :D)

[legobiwan]

Whumptober #5

“on the run”

Notes: Yes, I’m a day behind, I’m hoping to post a second story tonight but let’s see where life goes. This story...I started out with an idea, and then that idea went in a very different direction as I started writing. RotS AU.

General Whumptober tag

Whumptober 2020 #1

Whumptober 2020 #2

Whumptober 2020 #3

Whumptober 2020 #4

~~~~~~

If you were here, Qui-gon…

Right. If you were here you’d probably shackle me up - wrists tightly enclosed in Force-dampening binders, restraining collar around my neck. Your harsh words would be an invisible whip against my true skin, your touch too soft for a monster such as I, pleading almost, far too kind than what I deserve for my crimes.

You would do all this, Qui-gon, your eyes dark with disappointment, letting no other man or soldier or droid handle me except yourself. Your failure of a Padawan trussed up like a common criminal (common? Perhaps not.), signed, sealed, and delivered personally back to Coruscant for my trial and probable execution.

And you would be right to do so, Qui-gon. So, so right. Force, part of me wishes you could swoop down right now, take me in your arms, the last friendly touch I would ever know before you placed my body on the electroguillotine’s platform to the cheers of the Senate, to the stony facades of the Jedi Council. One last bit of kindness, your hand on my cheek, before the killing blade would deliver me from my sins, before this would all just be over.

After all, it’s not every day a member of the Jedi High Council assassinates the Chancellor of the Republic on live holofeed.

Their faces Qui-gon, the way the Force shifted like two ancient, tectonic masses, colliding as Palaptine - or should I say Sidious - fell from his lofty perch, body plunging, down, down, down until it hit the subterranean floor of the Senate chamber with a sickening, exhilarating thud.

The similarities to my subterfuge as Rako Hardeen were not unmarked, believe me, Qui-gon. Palpatine, however, unlike myself, continues to be dead, two neat holes placed through the side of his treacherous head.

I feel, perhaps, that I have forsaken myself.

But you weren’t there, Master, you didn’t watch through thin slits of wavering consciousness, of azure and crimson rainbows, of the sneaking tar of decay that oozed forth from the man who would lead - would conquer - the Republic and the Jedi. You weren’t there as your Padawan - your friend and brother, the boy you so cared for (more than myself, I can now admit). As Anakin brought the two blades together at Dooku’s neck, executioner of a death sentence signed in familiar large, looping letters - “Sheev Palpatine, Chancellor of the Republic.”

It was him, Qui-gon. The Sith Lord was right there, the entire time, one hand on Anakin’s shoulder, leading him to perdition.

And I did nothing to stop it.

Nothing, until now.

Perhaps if I had been the one to perish on Naboo…perhaps none of this would have ever happened. But that is another world lost to another time, and the ‘here and now,’ as you would say, consists of a cold storage closet in the rear of a Rodian smuggler’s ship.

Three days I’ve been cramped in this space, my passage paid with the frozen Twi’lek guard lying at my feet, legs bent at unnatural, backward angles, the trickle of blood dripping from their nose now an ugly, improvised tattoo.

It’s cold, Qui-gon. A blessing, in some ways, as my departed friend here is unlikely to suffer the worst effects of putrefaction, but I feel even if I were to be on the sunny beaches of Scarif, I would still shiver at my own conscience.

I am tired, Qui-gon.

~~~

You visited me in my dreams last night, Qui-gon.

Neither the avenging angel of death nor the soft shepherd of comfort, you stood, distant, enigmatic as a Loth-Sphinx, as distant and maddening as you had been in life.

I suppose this should have come as no surprise.

Why? You asked me.

Why what, Qui-gon? Why did I kill Palpatine, why did I run, why did I make a fool’s promise to you all those years ago?

As to the last question, I believe - well, perhaps not believe, but fervently hope - you know the answer already.

To answer the others - what choice did I have? To witness what I had, to know Anakin was in thrall to this…this thing, that I would never convince him of Palpatine’s true intentions, that I had lost any trust, any esteem he may have still had for me with my own betrayals -

It was all happening too fast, Qui-gon. The situation on Mandalore, the battle on Coruscant, Dooku’s death. I briefly confided in Bail Organa, the Senator from Alderaan, hinted at my actions in regards to the Mandalore situation, on the way to Coruscant. He told me in no uncertain terms that the Senate would be forced to bring down charges of insurrection, even possibly treason, once they learned of my manipulations of the GAR.

What was one more charge, on top of the others, I thought.

It…it’s better this way, Qui-gon. The Jedi, while still under suspicion, have an obvious and convenient scapegoat, a Council member gone rogue, the underground actor fanning the flames of rumors of a coup. Anakin, while unstable, is at least now out of his orbit. Whether he stays in the Order or leaves, I cannot say, but I hope for his sake - and his unborn child’s - he leaves.

Don’t you see, Qui-gon? The only one who must suffer here is me and I will do so gladly.

Ah, but why not turn myself in, you ask. The deed is done, why run from my actions?

The Twi’lek’s crimson lividity has given way to a more pale ochre, abdomen swollen and nauseated. While the cold has stalled this inevitable process, I must confess to being a bit wary of my companion’s stability.

One more night, and we shall reach Mandalore.

I remain here, discomfited bunkmate to the dead, while Cody and his men span the galaxy, hunting for the wayward Jedi - the turncoat, the traitor, the aruetii…

But you see, Qui-gon, as the galaxy turns its eye on me, it distances its gaze from the Order, from the Council’s machinations.

If I had not acted, someone else would have - with far more dire consequences, I fear.

We spoke of it, you know. Taking over the government, stripping Palpatine of his power (and how laughable a notion that is, to strip a Sith Lord of their edged fury. Impossible to achieve without bloodshed.) It’s not that we wanted to usurp the government - even within the Council itself, there was strong dissent to even considering this notion.

Mace would have gladly fallen on his lightsaber to see justice served. As would Kit. And Plo. And possibly Master Yoda.

But their souls were clean.

Mine, on the other hand…

It’s late Qui-gon, and I fear tomorrow will be an unpleasant day.

~~~

You once said, Qui-gon, that upon finding a confluence of paths, there is no correct direction, that, in the end, there was only a decision, and the consequences thereof.

I find myself in such a place.

It seems the news of my actions reached Mandalore before I did, the civil war now at an uneasy pause, Maul neutered (and what does that say about me, that I could not achieve this victory when Ahsoka could? Perhaps I am too close, too near that fault line to act as she could.)

But they do not know, Qui-gon, what I do. Ahsoka may look on in muted fury, Rex dipping his head as he comms Cody, his only words a soft we have him, Bo-Katan radiant with indignation - why could you have not done this before?

Before we both lost her, before Satine’s legacy was burnt to the ground, before it came to this.

They wrap me in cords and shackles and the best Jedi restraints Mandalore has to offer, dumping me in the same containment cell as him, who takes one look at my sorry state, who knows what sins are written on my soul.

Maul throws back his head, and cackles, the sound of a hundred broken mirrors.

They only have one, he says.

He doesn’t need to explain further.

The Mandalorian sarcophagus. We both saw it, that first time on Mandalore, Satine’s cheeks turning pink, then red, as she explained the true purpose of the monstrous devices.

We would never use them now, she said. There’s no need.

We can only hope, you answered.

And now, it is a question of who is the greater monster - the being born of blood and violence, or the one who accepted it into his heart.

He would have been his new apprentice, Maul drawls, with a sick smile.

I know, I answer. I do know, don’t I? Knew this entire time and yet could do nothing to stop it - until now.

Will you accept your fate, Kenobi? Be hauled back to Coruscant in chains, your allies grinning as your head falls from the blade?

I should. Damnit, I should, Qui-gon! I am a Jedi, I do not fear death, for there is only the Force.

And yet…

~~~

We are leaving, Qui-gon, Maul and I. To what end, I cannot say. Do not fear for me, Master of mine. I am long corrupted, past redemption in this life and can only hope to use my darkness for an ultimate good.

There is much to be done.

May I feel your soft hand on my cheek one more time, Qui-gon, if only in my dreams.

Please forgive me.

I am sorry.

Yours in this life and the next,

Obi-wan Kenobi.

[songofclarity]

when you said "[Huaisang] took taking down jgy so seriously and so professionally; he has no cheering moment or hail of victory" I was reminded of another post I saw about the moment at the beginning of NMJ's Empathy flashback where the disciples are celebrating the victory over the puppets but NMJ only looks grim. It's something the Nie bros have in common: both consider violence and killing to be necessary and justified— but it's a grim duty, to be undertaken with seriousness, not satisfaction

Yes, that comparison is exactly it, Anon! I do appreciate how CQL ensured Nie MingJue was all business during his fights. Even at the banquet when the Sunshot Campaign was over and done with, his group arrived late (‘Sorry I’m late, I didn’t want to come’) and he looked miserable. Not even an official victory party could put a smile on his face, much less encourage him to celebrate three years of hard work!

I would hesitate, however, before accusing the Nie brothers of finding violence and/or killing as necessary. Those are just tools in the tool box and they could be taken out as needed but they weren’t always needed, much less required. We see time and time again how the Nie brothers pick non-violent options when violence and murder would make their lives so much easier. And this choice between violence and non-violence is important. This is the choice that separates them both from Jin GuangYao. Because when it comes down to it, what was the point of having fought against the Wen Sect if they were all just to become violent and murderous themselves?

For convenience, I have outlined Nie MingJue’s 5 year plan here:

Fight a war against a violent sect

Win even if it might cost him his own life

Go home and live in peace

Nie MingJue stayed his hand from murder not once, not twice, but three times when confronted directly with a cold-blooded murderer. He picked suffering Meng Yao/Jin GuangYao to live over easily justifiable back-alley execution. He banged on the doors of Koi Tower demanding Xue Yang be turned over to him, but never used violence to take matters into his own hands, not even when he held Baxia at Xue Yang’s throat and could have ended the discussion right then and there.

The only people Nie MingJue ever killed were nameless cultivators on the battlefield; nameless cultivators when he was being held prisoner in the Sun Palace; and Wen Xu, a declared enemy met on the battlefield. There is no evidence or accusations that he ever killed anyone after the Sunshot Campaign, not at the Burial Mounds and not when he had his qi deviation.

Nie HuaiSang, for his part, could have just stabbed Jin GuangYao in the chest when he was crying on him and be done with it. Violence is easy. Murder is easy.

For the Nie brothers, violence was never necessary, but justice was. And there is no justice if you just become the beast you fought to defeat, so rules and morals must be taken into account.

Nie MingJue decided, on his own, to send Meng Yao back to his father to face justice after the murder of the Jin disciple. Nie HuaiSang worked to expose Jin GuangYao’s crimes and let the world decide on their own whether or not Jin GuangYao’s crimes deserved punishment.

Nie MingJue followed the rules. He played fair. He asked for permission. He talked in private. He made his demands. He was aggressive, but he never killed to get his way. How easy it would have been if he killed to get his way like Jin GuangYao did! But he didn’t. Nie MingJue was good. Nie MingJue died.

Nie HuaiSang picked up where Nie MingJue left off. The letter to Qin Su was just a letter to Qin Su revealing some of Jin GuangYao’s crimes. Jin GuangYao got away with murdering the Jin disciple all those years ago, and now he’s going to get away with direct involvement in the murder of his own child? Or baby-trapping and then marrying his own sister? No, no he is not. And he’s absolutely not getting away with Nie MingJue’s murder or dismemberment.

Nie HuaiSang still never picked violence. He never picked murder. He never told people what to do or how to do it, and he certainly never held a weapon in his hand. That’s the beauty of his revenge.

As the saying goes: the pen is mightier than the sword. He picked letting the information speak for itself and giving other people the option to use violence, but that was never their only option. Sadly, no revenge plan, no matter one taken as seriously as this one, is foolproof when other people are involved. Qin Su and the letter were discovered by Jin GuangYao, who then blackmailed her, imprisoned her, and then pushed her to suicide. This shows the depth of Jin GuangYao’s cruelty. Jin GuangYao reacting in violence is a Jin GuangYao problem.

As another saying goes: do not shoot the messenger. We already saw how the Jin Sect protected and absolved Xue Yang of his well-documented mass murder. Nie HuaiSang would have heard about how Jin GuangYao, Jiang Cheng, and Lan XiChen were all OK with the Jin protecting Xue Yang while Nie MingJue and popular rogue cultivator Xiao XingChen were very much not. In order to make Jin GuangYao face justice, the one choice Nie HuaiSang never had was to stand up and speak out and expose Jin GuangYao’s crimes. Xiao XingChen tried that with Xue Yang and it got him a fate worse than death. Nie MingJue tried to stand up to the Jin Sect and it got him betrayed and his death to look like an unfortunate event, not even a murder. So instead, Nie HuaiSang got the information out there as secretly as possible and let everyone else decide on what to do with it.

And thankfully everyone agreed with him that Jin GuangYao was trash. No violence was needed to help them see the light. Jin GuangYao made his bed and now he has to sleep in it.

Violence is only a Nie brother final resort when justice is about to be evaded. Nie MingJue is so horrified after the Sun Palace that he’s willing to kill Meng Yao and then himself over the murder of his subordinates. Meng Yao uses the “I saved your life” get-out-of-jail free card, which not only threatens to hold Nie MingJue hostage to a life debt but also means at least two cultivators where killed to save Nie MingJue’s one life. That’s terrible math! Where is the justice in this?? But in case he is in the wrong, Nie MingJue agrees to kill himself too, so justice WILL be served one way or another before Meng Yao runs away again.

Violence and murder are indeed grim tools for a serious duty and they need to be handled respectfully and with resolve! Note how Nie HuaiSang at no point lies and says, “I had no choice.” It was his choice to send the letters, it was his choice to put himself in danger at the Second Burial Mounds Siege and at Guanyin Temple, and it was his choice to save Sisi from her unlawful imprisonment and let her speak on her own behalf. This boy had choices, choices other than violence and murder, and he never victimized himself by claiming otherwise. He never pleaded innocence or passed the blame. He simply dodged the discussion entirely, but the ending shows he knows what he did and why.

Nie HuaiSang, "Wei-xiong, why do you keep on asking me? No matter how much you ask, I don't know anything." With a pause, he continued, "But..." Slowly, Nie HuaiSang brushed together his storm-drenched hair. "I think that if this person hates Jin GuangYao so much, they'd probably be entirely merciless towards something he cherishes more than his life." (Ch. 109, ERS)

Nie HuaiSang has so much conviction that his cavalier attitude after Jin GuangYao's death is so cold that if anyone touched him they would probably be burned. When Nie HuaiSang lies, he says, “I don’t know.” He knows the importance of information and he’s not about to expose himself for having any that might get him killed. Nie HuaiSang’s fight was different than Nie MingJue’s in tone and shape, but Nie HuaiSang kept the same agenda and, frankly, played by the same rules as his Nie MingJue.

Some rules Nie MingJue lives by:

Outside input is important

Don't kill people for the rewards

Have conviction in your choices

Jin GuangYao was in the process of fleeing justice at Guanyin Temple just like he fled justice at Langya. Jin GuangYao laid a trap for Nie MIngJue at Langya and there was no doubt going to be a trap at Guanyin Temple--so Nie HuaiSang sprung one on him first.

“Brother XiChen, behind you!!!” (Ch. 108, ERS)

And the choice to stab Jin GuangYao was Lan XiChen’s, not Nie HuaiSang’s, although Nie HuaiSang was determined to see justice prevail and that treacherous Third Brother brought down.

Of interest, Nie HuaiSang’s ten year agenda:

Expose Jin GuangYao’s violent crimes

Win even if it might cost him his own life

Go home and live in peace

Violence and murder were never on the agenda. They aren’t necessary. They were never necessary. The tragedy is thinking that they might be, and that’s Jin GuangYao’s tragedy, not the Nie brothers. Nie MingJue’s behavior shows a man who thought if he fought hard enough, pushed hard enough, allowed redemption arcs to a murderer, tried to work with people who didn’t want to work with him, peace might find a way.

Violence was only needed because Jin GuangYao could not be stopped in any other way. He burned the brothel down with all the women inside it to hide his past and he tried to massacre the whole cultivation world to hide his crimes. Considering the amount of death the Nie brothers have faced, from family dead from qi deviations to piles of bodies on the battlefield to allies killed to save their lives, I dare say the Nie brothers had a respectful relationship with violence and murder because they wanted to escape the cycle the most.

[no-reply95]

Jealous Guys

Something I’ve been thinking about for a while now is the different ways jealousy manifested for John and Paul over the course of their friendship.

I’m going to look at John and Paul in turn and have a look at some of the key ways jealousy appeared, before, during and after the Beatles period. This will be a looooong post so if you want to go on deep dive keep reading below.

John

Jealousy was something that John acknowledged as a big part of his personality, as far as I’m aware, he only acknowledged his jealousy publicly in terms of his relationship with Yoko but I believe jealousy was a feature of all of John’s major relationships. John’s first real partnership was with Pete Shotton, his childhood best friend, and Pete has outlined how John’s jealousy and possessiveness was a feature in their friendship with them falling out when Pete first started showing interest in girls and with John acting out when Pete started to spend more time with other friends, instead of him, here Pete recounts John’s reflection on this period of their friendship:

“Years later John confessed to having felt acutely jealous throughout that interlude: “I was scared shitless I’d lost you after our fight in science class, when you starting playing with David Jones. I really thought I’d gone too far with you that time.“

Pete Shotton, John Lennon: In My Life , 1983

Pete’s recollections establish a pattern in John’s life of acting out due to a fear of abandonment and losing those who are closest to him so it’s not surprising that once John had formed a strong bond with Paul that would stir similar fears in him. 

Below I’ve categorised the groups of people that were the focus of John’s jealousy and have picked one person from each group as an example:

Family - Jim McCartney

Paul’s family was and continues to be a big part of his life. From the outset of their friendship, John was made aware of how important Jim was to Paul and vice versa. John and Paul had to skip school to hang out together because Jim wouldn’t have John in their house initially and John confessed his resentment of Jim’s influence over Paul’s life. It appears that after some time John grew tired of having to contend with Jim for the position of the most important person in Paul’s life, and this culminated in John giving Paul a pseudo ultimatum as John discussed in 1971:

“But Paul would always give in to his dad. His dad told him to get a job, he fucking dropped the group and started working on the fucking lorries, saying, "I need a steady career." We couldn't believe it… “So I told him on the phone, "Either come or you're out." So he had to make a decision between me and his dad then, and in the end he chose me”

St. Regis Hotel interview, Sept. 5, 1971

Friends - Mal Evans

Throughout the active years of the band it was typical of them to refer to each other as their best friends and, given the lives they led, I think the simple fact that no one else could understand what it was like to be a Beatle would have meant they all shared a special bond. However, they all had friendships outside of the band and this was something that could cause issues for John when it came to Paul.

According to Tune In, Mal initially became friends with Paul during the band's initial shows at the Cavern Club then, after a suggestion from George, Mal became a part of the Beatles entourage thereafter. Mal had friendships with all the Beatles, as part of their inner circle, but from his comments it appears John took umbrage with the closeness of Mal’s friendship with Paul:

“Paul would suddenly come in with this circle saying, “This is Magical Mystery Tour, will you write that bit?” And I was choked that he’d arranged it all with Mal anyway, for a kickoff, and had all this idea going”

St. Regis Hotel interview, Sept. 5, 1971

Mal also comes up when John discusses his recollections of the writing of Eleanor Rigby:

“So rather than ask me, “John, do these lyrics—” Because by that period, he didn’t want to say that – to me. Okay? So what he would say was, “Hey, you guys, finish off the lyrics,”... “ Now, I sat there with Mal Evans, a road manager who was a telephone installer, and Neil Aspinall, who was a not-completed student accountant who became our road manager. And I was insulted and hurt that he’d thrown it out in the air”...” There might be a version that they contributed, but there isn’t a line in there that they put in.“

Playboy interview, David Sheff 1980

John’s discomfort with the closeness of Paul’s relationship with Mal was something that wasn’t lost on Mal’s wife Lil:

“He was always at their beck and call. He was a nice fella to have around, so much so that it could provoke little jealousies within the band. When I met Yoko years after Mal died, she said John had told her he’d been very jealous at one point of Mal’s relationship with Paul.”

Lil Evans interview with Ray Connolly, 2005

Love interests - Linda McCartney

Throughout their friendship both John and Paul had quite a few love interests, which (to varying degrees) prompted jealousy between them.

Although John displayed jealousy of a few of Paul’s love interests this was no more apparent than with Paul’s first wife Linda McCartney, which is confirmed by both John’s words and actions regarding Linda and her partnership with Paul:

“"Then Klein informed Lennon that McCartney had secretly been increasing his stake in Northern Songs. ‘John flew into a rage,’ recalled Apple executive Peter Brown. ‘At one point I thought he was really going to hit Paul, but he managed to calm himself down.’ One unconfirmed report of this meeting had Lennon leaping towards Linda McCartney, his fists raised in her face"

Peter Doggett, You Never Give Me Your Money

"Int: When did you first meet her [Linda]? John: The first time I saw her was after that press conference to announce Apple in America. We were just going back to the airport and she was in the car with us. I didn't think she was particularly attractive, I wondered what he was bothering having her in the car for. A bit too tweedy, you know. But she sat in the car and took photographs and that was it. And the next minute she's married him."

St. Regis Hotel interview, Sept. 5, 1971

“I was reading your letter and wondering what middle aged cranky Beatle fan wrote it... "What the hell—it’s Linda! . . . Linda— if you don’t care what I say—shut up!—let Paul write—or whatever.”

"Of course, the money angle is important—to all of us—especially after all the petty shit that came from your insane family/in laws—and GOD HELP YOU OUT, PAUL—see you in two years—I reckon you’ll be out then"

Draft letter from John Lennon to Linda McCartney, circa 1971

"The presumption is a) the Beatles would get together again or are even thinking about it and b) if they got together, John and Yoko split, Paul and Linda split"

John (with Yoko) talks to John Fielding on Weekend World, 1973

"John often speculated on why Paul and Linda remained married while, at the same time, resenting their evident happiness, to the extent that he had Green do a tarot reading to ensure him that Paul and Linda were really secretly miserable and were going to divorce within a year"

According to Fred Seaman and John Green, source

Paul

Of course jealousy wasn't a one-way street in the Lennon-McCartney relationship. Unlike with John, for Paul I'm focusing more on the key people I believe his jealousy, regarding John, was directed to:

Stuart Sutcliffe

John met Stu at Art College and struck up a really close friendship with him. At the point that John met Stu, John had already become friends with Paul so Paul felt threatened when Stu entered the picture:

"When he [Stu] came into the band, around Christmas of 1959, we were a little jealous of him; it was something I didn’t deal with very well. We were always slightly jealous of John’s other friendships.

When Stuart came in, it felt as if he was taking the position away from George and me. We had to take a bit of a back seat."

Paul McCartney, Anthology 2000

"Paul was saying something about Stu’s girl – he was jealous because she was a great girl, and Stu hit him, on stage. And Stu wasn’t a violent guy at all."

John Lennon, 1967 Anthology 2000

"I looked up to Stu. I depended on him to tell me the truth. Stu would tell me if something was good and I’d believe him. We were awful to him sometimes. Especially Paul, always picking on him. I used to explain afterwards that we didn’t dislike him, really."

John Lennon, The Beatles Hunter Davies 1968

Yoko Ono

Of all the relationships I've already discussed, the relationship and jealousy displayed from Paul towards Yoko is probably the most widely discussed in Beatles historiography and general discourse. From the official start of Yoko's relationship with John in 1968 it was clear that Paul resented her presence in John's life and her proximity to the band:

"He even sent them [John and Yoko] a hate letter once, unsigned, typed. I brought it in with the morning mail. Paul put most of his fan mail in a big basket and let it sit for weeks, but John and Yoko opened every piece. When they got to the anonymous note, they looked puzzled, looking at each other with genuine pain in their eyes. ‘You and your Jap tart think you’re hot shit’, it said."

Francie Schwartz, Body Count 1972

"Cause she’s [Yoko] very much to do with it from John’s angle, that’s the thing, you know. And I – the thing is that I – there’s— Again, like, there’s always only two answers. One is to fight it, and fight her, and try and get The Beatles back to four people without Yoko, and sort of ask her to sit down at the board meetings. Or else, the other thing is to just realize that she’s there, you know. And he’s not gonna sort of – split with her, just for our sakes."

Paul McCartney, Let It Be Sessions, 1969

"I told John on the phone the other day that at the beginning of last year I was annoyed with him. I was jealous because of Yoko, and afraid about the break-up of a great musical partnership. It’s taken me a year to realise that they were in love. Just like Linda and me."

Paul McCartney, interview with Ray Connolly, 1970

What are the similarities and differences in the way jealousy manifested for John and Paul?

I think it's obvious but bears repeating that both John and Paul displayed jealousy towards other people who they felt would threaten their relationship so that's central to all the instances I have flagged, Jim, Mal, Linda, Stu, Yoko all posed real or imagined threats to John and Paul's partnership.

However, you'll note that I included more sources to display John's jealousy regarding Paul and that I categorised John's jealousy targets whereas I only pulled out two key individuals for Paul, this isn't to say that John was more jealous than Paul was, as jealousy isn't something you can quantify, but to highlight my opinion that Paul's jealousy regarding John was more targeted than John's jealousy regarding Paul. I think what stands out to me is that, I think generally Stu and Yoko are held up as the prime examples of Paul's jealousy of other people getting close to John, as far as we know, Paul never had significant issues with other people who formed close relationships with John like Pete Shotton, Cynthia Lennon, Magic Alex etc., why was that? I think that Paul was more threatened when he felt that John was replacing him so by bringing Stu into the band (even though he wasn't a musician) and Yoko into the studio (one instance where Paul was especially hurt was when John gave Paul's line in The Continuing Story of Bungalow Bill to Yoko to sing), Paul perhaps felt that his place as John's primary collaborator was in jeopardy and that he could lose a partnership that had become central to his self-worth as a person - that, I believe, was when his jealousy was most likely to rise to the fore. John, on the other hand, had a much wider range of targets when it came to jealousy regarding Paul, why was John jealous of Linda? Linda wasn't trying to replace John as Paul's collaborator, if anything she wanted the Lennon-McCartney partnership to be stronger. Why was John jealous of Mal? Mal wasn't a musician, Mal was a huge fan of the band and constantly worked to fulfil their requests, so why was John so threatened by his friendship with Paul? For me, John's jealousy regarding Paul was more than just a fear of directly being replaced, I believe John's jealousy was fundamentally triggered by a fear of abandonment. I think the childhood trauma John experienced, of being left by both his parents, meant that whenever any of his close friendships and relationships were threatened, or he felt that someone close to him may leave him, he would act out. John fell out with his childhood best friend Pete when he got a girlfriend, John hit Cynthia when he saw her dancing with Stu, John was rude to several of Paul's love interests and ultimately John never fully accepted Paul's relationship with Linda because, although he could see that she could offer Paul the family life he always wanted, John didn't want Linda to take Paul away and give him a family that meant that Paul would no longer be able to prioritise John in his life as he had in the past.

Ultimately, we'll never know all the ways that jealousy factored into John and Paul's relationship with each other and those around them, as I'm sure it impacted several relationships in more complex ways than I can articulate (i.e. I suspect jealousy played a part in Paul's initial resentment of Brian but they grew closer over time so maybe Paul's jealousy lessened over time or Brian became less of a threat?). I do think it's important to consider that jealousy was present on both sides and was likely a factor in the breakdown of John and Paul's relationship, the breakdown of the Beatles and was a continued factor in disrupting reconciliations between John and Paul into the 70s and 1980.

[heartandfangs]

hey! how are you doing? feeling okay? i hope u got that writing of yours back!

Hey, thank you sweet anon for checking up on me 🥺❤️ Life + work is busy, but when I think about it, I have a lot to be grateful for. So I'm doing okay! Out of everything, I was only able to salvage like two pages of a fic that I haven't even put out yet (I had copied and pasted it onto a word counter site that automatically saves your progress and it actually kept it lol); everything else I am starting from scratch again.

But that's okay. I'm currently trying to move past it. In a way, losing my drafts helped me only keep the main points of IOU sans the fluff since I could only rewrite what I remember. I'm forced to improve things as I write it all again.

Best advice to avoid this for writers: Back up your work in multiple places and avoid the heartbreak!

IOU Part 5 is stalling a bit, so I took a little break from it and wrote another Jakey one-shot that I want to post within the week, but so far I've had a field day writing Heeseung's scenes in it! (Thank you to everyone who's waiting patiently for part 5 ✨)

Same for TWEWY which I started rewriting for fun; if I'm able to execute like properly and decide to repost it, it could have a very different feel to it while still having a similar premise (think a sexed up retro shoot 'em up zombie video game where the MC has abilities to fight back against creatures of the night) with better foundational concepts and a stronger plot.

Whoever you are anon, it means a lot that you check up on me! I hope you're doing well yourself, let me know if you're ever not.

Since you're so sweet, see below for a little IOU Part 5 teaser 🖤

Although Heeseung was as much of a wallflower as you were, his stunning fashion sense always garnered attention from anyone in the close vicinity. Dressed head to toe in black with a sleek leather coat and dress boots, he must’ve been drawing glances from strangers since he arrived, even appearing slightly intimidating to you despite knowing him.

Heeseung pushed off the wall and made his way towards you. You let him pull you into his arms as you rose to the tips of your toes just to barely thread your arms around his neck in a warm embrace.

Immediately, you appreciated the proximity; it was the first close human contact you’ve had in weeks. Almost wanting to just fall limp against him, you opted to rest your cheek against his shoulder and take in the scent of his cologne. He smelled of warm, subtle spice layered over crisp apples; reminded you of a crackling fireplace in the midst of the cold woods.

Heeseung felt you relax against him and rubbed comforting circles against your back in response. 

“You looked a little distressed there; something happen along the way here?”

Coming to your senses, you slipped your arms from his shoulders but his hands settled on your hips, keeping you close. It startled you slightly, being able to feel the outline of his natural bulge press against you. 

Breath catching, you replied, “...No. It was just a weird Uber drive, you know how those can be sometimes.”

“Next time let’s just meet at your place, and we’ll go from there together,” he looked into your eyes, slowly dragging his thumb over the curve of your hip.

[drake-the-incubus]

/rp

EDIT: Added a read more, the post had been originally written on mobile

For context, unless stated otherwise for the most part, this is the roleplay dynamic.

Ayyy, been seeing some Dream SMP takes on Tommyinnit’s character development that are pretty uh, piss poor. I want to point some obvious things out to people. Especially following the Technoblade/Tommyinnit team disbanding.

Techno isn’t right. Techno was certainly not in the right there, and Tommy didn’t do anything that regressed his character either, his entire character came to a development.

Let’s Start by pointing out that Wilbur has posted their Dungeons and Dragons Alignments, where Techno is Lawful Neutral and Tommy is Chaotic good. (For sake of the post, Tubbo is Lawful Good.)

So I’m going to break down exactly what was going on there and how it developed the characters.

If we go by Technoblade first, I’m seeing a lot of people say he’s better than Dream- he is- and therefore Tommy shouldn’t have left. Which is true, Techno is better than Dream, but he’s just like Wilbur. Watching from Technoblade’s POV, you notice that he starts carrying a book of the To-Do List he intends to do with Tommy. Outlining that he wants to destroy L’Manburg and tried, at almost every chance he got, to convince Tommy to do so.

Tommy said no, he didn’t want to destroy L’manburg, because he cared for it. He outright said no, he JUST wanted his discs back.

Techno concedes, saying Tommy doesn’t have to participate, only after failing to convince him many times.

Techno the entire time, tried to convince Tommy that Tubbo wasn’t his friend, that Tubbo obviously doesn’t care for him. (Not true, as Tubbo literally mourned him and thought he was dead and it destroyed him.) Which is EXACTLY what Wilbur did.

This is an isolation tactic. Techno used ANY means necessary to try and recruit Tommy. Because his character doesn’t care about interpersonal relationships so long as he gets his goal- possibly excluding Phil. His entire character sticks to one set of Morals and set of laws he’s self imposed. (Canonically refusing to truly give up violence).

1. Governments are bad.

2. Governments must be destroyed.

3. The means justify the ends so long as it destroys the government.

Technoblade’s character gets a lot of sympathy, which is cool, but I want to point out while he personally was felt betrayed, he never was.

Techno from the start, was anti-government. Willing to destroy it all so long as another country was never rebuilt. That was his only condition.

Except he KNEW everyone else wanted L’manburg back, that’s what the fight was about. It was very transparent that everyone else was working for L’manburg back.

The three people who wanted it destroyed? Wilbur, Dream and Techno.

Techno wasn’t betrayed, he chose to ignore the goals of his allies until it came time that everyone took back L’manburg. He ignored knowledge that was given to him plenty of times, by Tommy himself even. They wanted L’manburg back. Techno talks of betrayal, but when Tommy points out that Techno betrayed them, he falters and excuses himself.

Which brings Tubbo into the mix. Tubbo was an ally, and he was working with them, WILLINGLY, to give information because he wanted to take down Schlatt and return L’manburg to how it was. He was trapped, scared and wanted help. In the festival, when Technoblade shoots him, THAT is a clear act of betrayal. Techno kills Tubbo, at Schlatt’s orders, betraying Tubbo and Tommy’s trust in him as he worked, clearly, for the other side, against their collective goals.

Techno claims the ends justify the means, and that he was under mild amounts of peer pressure. This is an example of his character. He doesn’t feel bad for hurting his ally, because they got something out of it. If it suits him, he WILL hurt his allies to get ahead in his goals, and he will say anything to justify it.

Tommy’s character cannot agree with this. He values friendship the most, and would give up his goals for his friends, as a true Chaotic Good, he values his friends and the people around him, over any law or morals, and would break his laws and morals for it.

He couldn’t understand Techno shooting Tubbo, because he wouldn’t. There wouldn’t be a force on the SMP that could make him shoot Tubbo in Techno’s place. They have too widely different views, where Tommy values friendship and people, Techno values ideals and goals.

So, we’re not even done and this is pretty long, let’s cover Tommy and the discs. The entire plot device for season one and two.

Tommy’s attention to the discs are goal oriented, to get back his discs no matter the costs, yeah? Except I feel like some of you have no idea where this goal came from. Tommy gave up the discs before, despite fighting for them desperately, so his friends could have L’manburg. He fought desperately, to have those discs back initially, as a war against Dream.

“Before this, before everyone, before L’manburg, it’s always been me and you, against Dream.” Tommy to Tubbo, before the Pogtopia vs Manburg war. (Might not be a true quote.)

This isn’t just a cute little moment, Tommy CARES for Tubbo deeply, they’re some of the closest friends on the SMP. He fought Techno because Techno killed Tubbo. It was personal for him, that is his best friend and he would do anything for him.

Tommy does, do anything for Tubbo, promising that no matter what, it will be the both of them. That they will always be together. This isn’t showing his hero complex, this isn’t a show of some inherent flaw. This is Tommy’s closest and most valuable interpersonal relationship. Chaotic Good Tommy values his friendships deeply.

So when Techno continuously tries to pressure Tommy into believing Tubbo and him aren’t friends, that Tubbo doesn’t care, and so they should hurt Tubbo to get the discs back, Tommy refuses. He refuses over and over again, claiming he trusts Tubbo will give back the disc.

Technoblade uses the framework Dream made, by the way, to accomplish this. He takes Tommy’s fragile mental state and uses that to his advantage. He does what Wilbur does, and almost succeeds. Tommy falters, believing momentarily that Tubbo doesn’t care. Something Dream was trying to convince him of in his isolation. Which isn’t true. Tubbo, upon learning Tommy is dead, is in disbelief and despair.

Let’s talk about the hostage situation for a moment. Tommy tells Tubbo off for not coming to his beach party, and that he was never visited, never received letters, and he was told the same thing from Tubbo as Wilbur said; “I wasn’t invited. I did send you things.”

The broken relationship we see? It’s falsely constructed by Dream. That bond exists still, fractured because someone came in with the intentions to break and destroy Tommy’s interpersonal relationships and manipulate him.

Tommy’s exile arc, was an abuse arc. Tommy was regularly abused by Dream. Techno profited off it, and used Tommy’s fragile mental state to try and achieve his goals, not even trusting Tommy until, in his fragile state, they both threaten Fundy. Techno sees this as commitment to the cause.

Tommy wanted his discs, Techno wanted L’Manburg destroyed.

So when the community house was destroyed, and we get that scene with Techno going with Tommy, they both have a moment. But I’ll address that in a second.

First, Tommy rushes in to defend himself, saying he didn’t destroy the community house. That he was innocent.

Tubbo doesn’t believe him. Why? Because Tommy does this. Tommy destroys things, he burned George’s house (taking the fall for Ranboo), he did plenty of things.

Tommy and Tubbo fight, and Tommy says, “the discs were worth more than you ever were”. This line, I’ve seen it interpreted many ways, one being he used to value the discs over Tubbo, and another being his values as a character.

It’s neither, by the way. It’s a heat of the moment comment, it shocks Tommy into silence, he instantly regrets it. He hates that he said it. Tommy’s goals, in that moment, change, based on his alignment. His goal doesn’t matter, if it’s hurting the people he cares for. It’s hurting Tubbo, it’s time to get rid of the goal.

In that instant, the discs do not matter. They mean nothing. Tommy doesn’t care for them. This is the moment that he GROWS as a character. Instead of obsessively wanting the discs and harming his friends for it, he is willing to let them go so he can foster his friendship. His arc, comes to an end. He doesn’t choose to be a hero again, that’s not what that is. No, he chooses his friend, the one he’s put so much faith and trust into, over something he has realized doesn’t mean more.

He tells Tubbo to give the disc to Dream, because he doesn’t care about them anymore, the sentimentality he has with them and Tubbo mean nothing if he loses Tubbo. Chaotic Good, he chooses the people over his goals and morals (which change on a whim).

Techno, who was using the discs to get Tommy to cooperate, who only recently thought Tom y and him were equals, is enraged because he can’t understand it. He can’t understand Tommy giving up his goal, because he couldn’t. His goals and ideals, they never went away in retirement, he was always wanting to destroy the government, he was planning it behind Phil’s back even. Everything he did was in preparation for a war. I think, even without the execution, Techno would have gone back to his ideals to destroy the government.

Which is why Techno, is angry. He feels betrayed, because once again, the outcome that was obvious happened, and someone stuck to their own words. Tommy would never harm Tubbo, and he wasn’t going to help Techno against L’Manburg.

But Tommy doesn’t do it maliciously against Techno, willing to even try and stay friends, showing he still cared for him. Tommy values his friends, including Techno in that moment.

What Techno sees is Tommy’s betrayal, Tommy broke their alliance because his goal is gone. “Help me get back the discs.” Tommy said when they made that deal. That no longer applies, Tommy was never intending on helping with the destruction of L’Manburg or the death of his friend.

Techno, once again, convinced himself that he would be assisted in his goal despite the vocal outcry against it.

So what does Techno do? He gets revenge. He teams up with Dream immediately.

That’s Techno’s character. Interpersonal bonds mean nothing if they get in the way of his goal, but he doesn’t go out of his way to purposefully destroy them. The MOMENT Tommy isn’t with him, Techno doesn’t have an issue with Dream or what he’s done.

Techno willingly teams up with Tommy’s abuser, because he gets his goal.

Tommy, who still cares for Techno is in shock at this. He sees Techno as a friend, like Tubbo. This hurts him.

Techno, later, even goes on to say he doesn’t care for friends so long as the people he’s with share his ideals, ending into the extreme of his alignment.

Techno has never been a good guy. He’s an antagonist of the SMP. Particularly, he’s not a villain, but antagonist. He’s an obstacle. Not via his person, but his goals.

And he wins, and he tells Tommy, “you never saw me as a person, only a weapon, you betrayed me twice now”.

Tommy, who has seen them as friends, after Techno broke their friendship off the first time with the withers, counters, “and what of Schlatt and what you did to Tubbo”.

Which Techno dismisses as, “in the past” and “it doesn’t matter”. To Techno, it’s not relevant how he treats others, his betrayal to other people doesn’t matter, just the perceived betrayal towards himself.

In the end, Techno is blinded by his beliefs. They controlled him to the extremes. To the point where he would burn any bridge made to keep them.

But Tommy? Tubbo? They gave up L’Manburg, to make their own little place. No vocal apologies were given, yes, and they should address that, but they gave up the country to be together as friends.

And for anyone wondering, Tommy and Tubbo are friends again, through action. Tommy, contrasting his words, gave the discs up to repair his friendship.

Techno, true to his word, destroyed the country and killed anyone who stood in his way. Even going out of his way sometimes to target Tubbo and Tommy.

In short, Techno was a second Wilbur to Tommy, and it shows that some people ignored the subtle manipulation attempts to achieve his goal. Is he as bad as Dream? No, not even close actually. But he’s as bad as Wilbur.

I also want to point something out on ages. Techno is canonically an adult. Tommy is a child, a kid. He’s a kid. The dynamic between them was skewed.

Techno saw a kid, in distress, and in a poor mental state, and tried to manipulate him.

When the kid figured out he didn’t want his goal anymore, he backed out. Techno punished him, by repeating what would be a huge source of trauma for him.

Techno tried to destroy L’Manburg, and succeeded. And he told Tommy that, “you could have just sat out”.

Tommy couldn’t. Because Tubbo is, and always will be, his closest friend. He values his bonds, but he promised Tubbo it was the two of them.

As Philza is the exception to Techno’s alignment, the promise to Tubbo is the exception to Tommy.

There was no betrayal, but a shift in goals and ideals from Tommy, which lead to Tommy and Technoblade no longer needing to be allies.

The narrative isn’t supposed to be black and white, that’s most of the characters. Techno being a big perpetrator of this. The narrative is a morally Grey area, where you can side with whoever you want.

That’s it, that’s the meta.

- Signed, A Techno and Tommy apologist

[autumnslance]

About Plagiarism

I left a long, planned essay on Twitter tonight. I will copy the meat of it here for y’all, as recently a friend was copied (a rarer ship in the fandom, so very noticeable by the writer and their regular beta reader) and it seems we need a Talk, kids. Links and screenshots and my rambling underway.

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Apparently we need to discuss what is and isn’t plagiarism. Especially in FanFic where we're interacting with the same characters, settings, ideas. Let’s start with the dictionary and continue the thread from there (I like the word origin/history personally):

Definition of plagiarize

transitive verb  : to steal and pass off (the ideas or words of another) as one's own : use (another's production) without crediting the source

intransitive verb : to commit literary theft : present as new and original an idea or product derived from an existing source

The Kidnapping Roots of Plagiarize

If schools wish to impress upon their students how serious an offense plagiarism is, they might start with an explanation of the word’s history. Plagiarize (and plagiarism) comes from the Latin plagiarius “kidnapper.” This word, derived from the Latin plaga (“a net used by hunters to catch game”), extended its meaning in Latin to include a person who stole the words, rather than the children, of another. When plagiarius first entered English in the form plagiary, it kept its original reference to kidnapping, a sense that is now quite obsolete.

“Ideas” is fuzzy in the Merriam-Webster definition. There are story archetypes that exist in many forms. Joseph Campbell’s Monomyth/Hero's Journey outlines many famous stories. And it's popular to say that “Avatar” is “Dances with Wolves” is “Pocahontas” is “The Last Samurai” etc.

But note how while those films have similar plotlines--”Military Guy falls for Native woman, learns to appreciate her Culture, stands up to Evil Bosses”--none of them execute those ideas in the same way. Sully’s story is different from Dunbar’s not just cuz one’s a Science Fiction epic and the other a Western. Disney's “Pocahontas” Very Loosely takes history and uses the same story beats. The Last Samurai uses the Meiji era Westernization. Same ideas, different executions, even beyond settings.

None of these are plagiarizing each other though the ideas are similar. They’re told in their own ways, own language; both in the genres they belong to (Western, Pseudo-History, SciFi, Animated) and how characters interact with each other and settings. Original dialogues (variable quality).

We also see this in books as similar novel plots get published in waves so we end up with bunches of post-apocalypse teen revolutionaries or various vampires or lots of young wizard stories all at once. Sometimes ideas just happen like this; multiple discovery, simultaneous invention, concurrent inspiration, cognitive emergence are all phrases I’ve seen for it. So it happens in original content as well, and legality gets fuzzy (Also why you don't send authors your fanfic ideas).

In existing properties, this gets trickier but even “Elementary”’s Holmes and Watson are nothing like the BBC’s “Sherlock” characters. Who are nothing like other versions of the Detective and his Doctor pal over the decades in various media properties.

FanFic's in a similar position where like Sherlock Holmes we play with the same characters, setting, and storyarcs but give our own spin to them. People can and will have similar ideas about plots. Trick is to use your own words. Take the characters and make the story your own.

I have a good example courtesy of @raelly-writing​. We both ship Wolcred. We both wrote soft post-Paglth’an scenes with Thancred and our WoLs. Both features the couples helping each other undress, examining injuries, bathing, bantering. My fic was written soon after 5.5 part 1 came out. Dara’s is much more recent. Yet at no point reading hers did I feel she was copying my words. The PoVs differ. Our characters focus on different things. Mine has a mini-arc concerning the Nutkin.

The links for comparison’s sake (and maybe leave kudos/comments if so inclined please and thanks). Note while the scenes are very similar no phrases are written in the same way. Mine: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25417882/chapters/76059467 Dara’s: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26067565/chapters/81832915

Dara and I both hang out in certain Discords and I know conversations about Thancred and WoL caring for each other post-battle has come up in those channels and we've both participated. It’s a stock FanFic scene to boot. Cuz it's soft and feels warm and snuggly.

I HAVE been copied before, back in WoW. My case is pretty clear cut so here are the images of my old RP Haven profile (1st, old RP website) and the plagiarist’s RSP (2nd, an in game mod to share descriptions and basic info). 

This was a decade ago on Shadow Council and I think the character deleted so any Availa’s in WoW now aren’t the same person. I left the names to point out what changed. Just the names and a word or 2 to make sense for the class changes as well. Otherwise lifted directly from my RP profile.

The funny part is how the person got caught. Literally walked into our weekly RP Guild meeting that I was running and asked to join. Folks noticed right away the similar backstory; after all there may have been more Outland-born Azerothians. My initial excitement at a character I could weave into our story turned to gut-twisting rage and grief as I recognized my own exact words though. Words I’d carefully crafted and constantly iterated on to improve over time (before and after this incident, until the site died).

When caught they tried to claim their significant other had leveled the character for them and made up the backstory based on Skyrim. If you know WoW’s Outland story and Skyrim’s plot you know how ridiculous that is. Also tried to lie about other drama I knew about thanks to roommate's characters but hey. I had to be blunt that I’d shared the info with Haven mods and other guild officers Alliance and Horde. That we would not “laugh about this” one day though lucky this was “just” RP not original or academic work. Cuz if it'd been monetized or academic I would've raked them through the coals.

I felt violated. Hurt. Had anxiety attacks. They took MY WORDS and tried to claim them as theirs. Have another character born in Outland trained by Draenei; Awesome! Our characters have an instant connect in similarities and differences of that experience. Don’t steal my characters wholesale!

Then the audacity of trying to come into my guild as if no one would notice. ShC wasn’t a large server by then, still active but not nearly Wyrmrest Accord or Moon Guard big. My character was well known due to my writing and RP. Speaking of how easy it is to get caught in specific spaces...A case of a self-published novelist getting noticed for plagiarizing fanfic was discovered recently (explicit erotica examples through the thread).

One way they got noticed was how much content they put out in only a year, lifted from fandom. The examples in Kokom’s threads show how the material was altered but still recognizable. In some cases, just the names are changed as in my experience. In other passages more has changed but you can still see the bones of the original fic poking through in the descriptions and character interactions, even with adjustments made.

Similar ideas happen. Similar plots exist. Same 'ships with friends are fun! In FanFic we’re working with the same material. It’s possible to write a similar scene differently. To make that scene and characters your own. All we’re asking is not to copy others' words. Others' characters. Others' specific phrases and descriptions used to bring those words, those characters, to life. Use your own. In the end you’ll be happier.

I get wanting to have what the perceived “popular people” have. I get seeing concepts others succeed with and wanting some of that too. We all get a bit jealous now and then for various reasons. Sometimes we don't even realize it, consciously. But do it in your own way. Maybe check to see if you’re getting a bit too close to the “inspiration” you admired, maybe reread often. Don’t hurt your fellow creatives. If you do and get caught don’t try to double down. Have the grace to be abashed at least and work to do better. Eventually you WILL get caught. All it takes is once to throw all else you've done into question. Ao3 doesn’t take kindly to plagiarists. Nor do a lot of fan communities focused on writing and RP. Getting back that trust is hard. The internet doesn’t forget easily, for good or ill.