#which she didnt really finish that thought which felt like an 'but i know better'

[geekwiththeglasses]

You know the more I think about it the more I'm annoyed that when I said "I'm an anxious" person the other person replied "I can tell" even though it wasn't meant to be like in an asshole type manner its like im supposed to be training you on this assay while juggling that not only are you more than twice my age (and thus I'm kinda getting the vibe that you are kinda chaffing at being trained by someone who wasn't even alive when you were well into your career) but you have lots of experience in the lab which I don't want to disregard (even though the shit you will touch without GLOVES gives me a hernia because you'll obsessively change them but then touch dirty areas with bare hands and throw your fucking labcoat on a clean desk????? But give me a look when I say no coats on clean areas like there aren't fucking SIGNS) and you're the team lead so there's inherent authority in place even though this is my assay so it's like Jesus its almost like your existence around me training you is designed to trigger the ever loving shit out of my anxiety so it kinda felt like an asshole remark

[sixohsixoheightfourtwo]

re: what fandom 'a little life' came from, my immediate knee-jerk thought was "backstreet boys." i have absolutely no basis for this other than Terminally Online Brain Worms esp bc..........there are 5 of those boyband fellas and as far as i remember only 4 main characters in that book lmfao. what can i say. the boyband angle feel right

yeah i'll incorporate that into my belief system

[bi-scottsummers]

Hi, hello, just came here to say that I love your fic "trending in Japan". I was wondering if you had headcanons regarding Kenji or Emi or interpersonal relationships and stuff. Many hugs for you.

hi hello, thank you for the encouragement and hugs! After some thought ive realized I do in fact have some hcs about some of the character dynamics in the movie as well as just kenji himself, cause hes captivated my entire brain:

Kenji & Emi

Emi does not have teeth but she does inexplicably have a teething phase. kenji is forced to hide all his (salvaged) fancy cars in the garage bc the corvette's already been chewed to hell and his heart is gonna give out if he has to watch any more classics get wrecked

he reads her bedtime stories. A lot of aesop's fables, because theyre short and fun and hes trying to raise his monster daughter with good morals. emi goes hogwild for these but its unclear if she actually understands what hes saying; kenji's pretty sure she just likes the silly voices he uses for different characters

they go flying together! they go first thing in the morning before breakfast - it helps kenji shake off the grogginess of sleep and emi gets to stretch her wings. shes not able to go very far for very long initially, but as she grows and gets those cardio gainz she almost gets to be quicker than him. they have races and play air tag :)

while she doesnt have the vocal range to speak english herself, it becomes clear that emi does understand it well. (kenji also develops an ear for her chirping/squawks, though body language & facial expressions play a big part in communication for both of them) during her (much later) rebellious phase she'll simply pretend not to know what's being said when kenji is telling her to do something she doesn't wanna do, which frustrates him to no end

Kenji

developed a pretty massive chip on his shoulder after moving to the states. it wasn't just bitterness over his dad staying behind, though that was a part of it. this is canon but he was picked on in school for "how [he talked], how [he looked] and what [he ate]." he felt like he had something to prove to both his father and the world. he threw himself into sports - specifically baseball - and his academics, and he did so well that it forced everyone to shut up about how he was different from them and focus on how he was better than them

^ playing off this: kenji had a bonkers fucking yonkers routine when he was a kid/in highschool. he'd get up hours before school started to practice his swing, go for a ~1hr run, workout, study, etc. He'd go to school, come home, and do it all again. this is exaggerated but my point is that this kid was DETERMINED and had the discipline to see that determination through to the end

didnt have many friends because of all aforementioned things. he had acquaintances, and he was invited to parties and outings and stuff (never went), but he spent most of his free time hanging out with his mom. he never really had a "parents are so embarrassing" phase. he always liked to do anything with his mother: going to the bank, going grocery shopping, watching cheesy telenovelas till ungodly hours in the morning, etc. she was his no.1 supporter, confidant, and best friend

he played for his university's baseball team and got scouted at 19. his mom forced him to finish his bachelor's first so once he graduated with his degree in kinesiology at 21, he was drafted to the dodgers

Kenji & Ami

both of them, up until meeting each other, were totally dedicated to their career (and child) so they had basically 0 time for friends. theyre both borderline losers but theyre juuust good enough at what they do for people to admire them instead of finding them sad and lowkey pathetic

kenji is way more into the idea of being friends than ami is. hes pretty enthusiastic about it; he thinks that they have a kind of rapport, since they share a similar work ethic and are both (unbeknownst to ami) single parents. he calls her to chat abt random things. ami initially isnt superrrr into it; she thinks kenji is kinda lonely and desperate for human connection, & it isnt until her mom points out that she has not spoken to anyone outside of work-related reasons in 10+ years that shes like oh shit, i am also lonely and desperate for human connection. so she grudgingly acquires a friend. theyre both really bad at it

need to clarify that in my mind their dynamic is 95% kenji yapping about work and drama in his personal life (circumventing the 8m baby kaiju hes raising) while ami goes "mhm mhm" and takes notes until kenji notices and is like What are you doing. at which point ami is like...... right . nothing. im listening. and forces herself to put the notepad away. she has a hard time disengaging from the reporter mindset and just hearing something intriguing without turning it into an article. the other 5% are the rare moments where theyre connecting super well - ami's psychoanalyzing the hell out of whatever kenji just said and hes like what are you my therapist. over time she starts opening up to him, too, and eventually theyre comfortable enough to be having philosophical discussions over breakfast just for funsies

before kenji reveals that hes ultraman, ami thinks hes in a gang. he keeps showing up to their lunch "dates" with like bruised eyes and fractured bones and gets all shifty when she tries to ask about what happened. when she eventually confronts him about it, hes so offended that she thinks hed be involved in something like that that he tells her about being ultraman

thats about all i can think of rn, though im sure ill think of more after rotating all the characters in my head for a while. thanks again for stopping in, i appreciate the support :)

[magpod-confessions]

Honestly i wanna hear opinions on season 4, cus im gonna confess i could NOT finish it (didnt move on to season 5 either lol). Got to like ep 135 & i just couldnt tell any of the episodes apart it felt like such a drag; just a slog of misery with some offhand Important 5 Minutes once in a blue moon. I hate repetition & i got the sparknotes from fandom/wiki stuff so yeahhh i just stopped listening; i still love TMA & it’s story & characters, it’s just the execution that got to me RIP

Everything felt kinda forced to me ig? Like there was some shoe-horned “humans are more monstrous than the actual monster” that snuffed S1 Jon’s fun cockiness/jackassery just to make him ? The best one in the archive ??? & all of his wrongdoings are either off-screen or justified by him being tricked into becoming a literal monster against his will (who would STARVE w/o his ‘evil-doings’, which didnt even kill ppl). Also felt like everyone got needlessly dumbed down except for Martin (the Love Interest ofc, who got 180’d from his pre-established incompetency to be some mastermind in a playing field he should have REALLY been inept in) just so they’d be blind to Jon’s situation & be mean to him LMAO

They started trying to make Jon accountable for “choosing this” & i couldnt handle it, held no fucking water to me—the guy being explicitly puppetted & manipulated as the entire plot? That guy is expected to take responsibility here? Felt like some after-thought theme they threw on top of it all. Anyways uhh feel free comment either on what i said and/or your personal thoughts on the season, or nothing if ya got nothing lol

🗣️

Ehh disagree. S4 isnt my fav but I dont think its bad. S1 Jon to s4 jon feels like natural character progression to me. He starts as acting all high and mighty to try hide the fact he has no idea what hes doing and is terrified, and then experiences a lot of ppl dying that he feels is due to him and is his responsibility. At that point his thought pattern is 'I keep messing up and making mistakes and getting myself and everyone around me hurt, so other ppl surely know better'. Hes got a lot of black and white thinking around him, which has been consistent throughout his entire characterization

I dont think any characters were dumbed down either

Melanie was always angry, she only go worse bc she had smth making her think everything she did was justified and when that stopped she became avoidant and stopped lashing out. She was still angry, just managing it better

Basira has always been Daisys no1, the person to justify all of Daisys actions. She knows what daisy did and why its bad but she holds onto the idea that daisy is right in doing so. She blames jon for what he does bc logically she knows its wrong, hurting ppl who havent done anything is wrong, but still excuses daisy bc she needs to. Bc that was a fact of her life and it cannot be wrong. In the unknowning she focuses on facts to keep her grounded and to her 'Daisy is a good person' 'Hurting ppl is wrong' and 'If you hurt ppl you are a bad person' are all facts she needs in her life to stay grounded. How she justifies Daisys actions is by saying that the ppl who daisy hurt were worse and it ultimately helps more ppl to have them gone. Not only can she not do that with Jon, as she believes those he hurts are entirely innocent, she also doesnt care to. Shes not close with Jon and she doesnt have 'Jon is a good person' as a fact in her mind, so she doesnt need to work to excuse his actions. Its all or nothing with her, if you hurt and continue hurting ppl, no matter your reason, you need to stop and the only way you will stop is if you are gone. She also has a lot of black and white thinking, gotta love the autism podcast

Martin being a mastermind in s4 also makes sense bc him being stupid is an act. If ppl think your stupid theyll underestimate you and ultimately leave you alone. They wont scrutinize you, they wont attack every part of you, they will brush it off as just a typical normal thing. It will get you ignored and you cannot be hurt if nobody knows who you are or how to hurt you. Its a lonely miserable existence but its one martins used to. Martin rarely drops the mask of 'Sweet but stupid' bc he needs that to survive and tbh he probably learnt that from needing to survive his mom LOL. Martin just knows and picks the best method of getting ppl to like him, which for him is doing exactly what they want and keeping their expectations low so they wont hurt him as much when they mess up. Honestly in s5 I see him as hes finally got to a place where he doesnt care if everyone hates him, bc he has someone who does and thats all he needs. Hes survived the worst of it and he doesnt care anymore

Part of the reason everyone blames Jon is bc he is there and he is the one who is currently causing the most problems. Also they dont actually see the extent that Jon is manipulated. Elias talks and interacts with Jon differently to how he interacts with others. All of them met Jon when he was already at the institute, they meet him when it does actually look like he made his choice, entirely of his own free will. It doesnt help that daisy is there, someone who completed their transformation like Jon did and turned back on it, and she looks like shes managing well enough. She is surviving without feeding so why cant Jon do the same? Also basira does trust elias on some level. She trusts he knows more than she does and can be an asset if used correctly, which definitely doesnt help things. Also the idea of Elias is locked up, he cant affect Jon anymore so why is Jon still acting this way. Elias has very effectively vilified and isolated jon and jon doesnt fight back against it bc he believes it as well. Other ppl are normally right so why wouldnt everyone be right abt him?

Oh my god that was an essay and I absolutely missed sooo much stuff but idk take that - rosette

i literally have nothing to add . rosette sincerely you are insane and i love that . i honestly don't have a lot of s4 opinions that i could really put down , but i also disagree anon . s4 may not have been the best , but it certainly wasn't Bad or not enjoyable to listen to . coming from someone who has listened to the podcast twice now [ and who is planning on a third relisten ] , i really do enjoy s4 as a whole . martin's buildup and his manipulation of peter lukas is honestly one of my favourite parts , because it has been said that martin was originally going to be apart of the mother of puppets ! this shows that part of martin we didn't get to see but has been there . i got distracted and don't remember what else i was gonna type um . whoops - deceit

[moonsidesong]

finished UT Yellow pacifist ! i really really enjoyed it! i will definitely be going back for the other runs but i'd like to let this sit for at least a few days before i go back in.

extended thoughts below!! yaayay!!!!

ok im sorry to open with a negative thought but if i can be a little mean. ceroba's fight suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucks. visually its insanely cool, musically its insanely cool, the presentation overall rocks, but gameplay wise its the worst ive played so far bar none.

i think this game for the most part had pretty fun and interesting bullet patterns for the bosses and, especially in the case of Axis, El Bailador, and Guardener's fights, i really got the sense i was getting a little better each time as i memorized the attacks, which is exactly what i want from a UTDR boss fight! i heart memorization.

... but Ceroba's fight was the only one where i felt like the bullet patterns just had no rhyme or reason to them. i think using several simple attacks to make a layered complicated one is a good idea in theory but in the way they did it i kinda just felt like she was throwing random crap at me and when I did beat it (which took i think around an hour) i sorta just got the impression that i was lucky enough her RNG picked the easier ones a few extra turns in a row rather than feeling like i actually accomplished anything (anything with the gravity black hole added was just kind of a death sentence for me, maybe its a skill issue but i feel like yknow. im okaaayyy at bullet hell... wah...)

also, i dont know much about game design, but the overall momentum of the fight is set up to really only be good if you beat it the first time. which is not great. they make you watch a cutscene every time you die and although it is brief, it breaks things up just a little too long! you get really sick of hearing the first few notes of what are otherwise great songs in her fight, and it makes it harder to feel for her when watching her scream starts to become annoying. i think if it were up to me, it'd be best if when you died, there was no cutscene, and the game over screen didnt have music or text and was JUST the Retry/Continue prompts so you can jump back into the action quickly. if we wanna take it a step further, because the music opens with such intense notes, stop making it start over!!!! pick it up where it left off!!!! maybe even have the game over menu not even stop the music, just muffle it temporarily or something. i dont know. thats what id do if it were up to me but i did not make anything im just a guy writing a tumblr post

anyway hater hour over. i mentioned those three boss fights earlier because they were my favorites. i thought they were really fun. i can see how some people might think the shield mechanic during Axis's fight might suck but it was like easily my favorite actually HAHAHA idk i thought it was fuuuuun heehehe yaay i block the bullets and it makes a good sound sound makea me happy <- this is the hightest compliment you can get from a misophonic player

also the ending made me cry. this isnt saying much because literally everything makes me cry but it did in fact make me cry. u show me characters showing a moment of genuine vulnerability in a bittersweet atmosphere and uh oh

anyway.

i mentioned in my previous thought post that i was interested in seeing where the running theme of "jobs/employment" was going, and seeing it play out into meaning "forever unfinished business" was really good. Martlet quits the Royal Guard having felt like she never really did anything there, neither Chujin nor Ceroba could finish what they set out to do, and Clover never even saw the other human souls. theres probably more than that too thats just what i remeber my memorys actually kinda bad i never remember anything until i play it like three times oops. maybe i should start writing my thoughts as i go instead of making big unorganized writeups on tumblr after the fact.

also this is a really small personal nitpick that doesnt matter but i dont like ceroba's skirt. i think having such a regal traditional outfit otherwise and then just wearing a short skirt that goes above her knees makes her look more like a schoolgirl than it does someone who is like At The Minimum in her thirties. i get not wanting a long skirt to get in the way of her silhouette for her boss fight since shes all like stanced up but at that point just give her pants LOL

i don't care to comment much on the writing, on the whole i really liked it so i dont have as much to say, but i dont think martlet shouldve been there in the room with you for Chujin's tapes. i think that shouldve been a quiet moment with just Clover so it could Sit with you for a second. thats my only writing gripe in this very moment.

anyway GRAHHHH I ENDED UP WRITING A LOT OF THINGS I DIDNT LIKE AND I DONT WANT TO LEAVE WITH THE IMPRESSION I HAD A NEGATIVE EXPERIENCE SO:

MUSIC WAS REALLY GOOD!!! I LIKED ALL THE CHARACTERS!!!! I LIKED MAKING AXIS'S FUNNY ROBOT PARTNER I THOUGHT THAT WAS FUNNY!!!!!!!! ASIDE FROM THE FINAL BOSS I THOUGHT THE GAMEPLAY WAS FUN!!!!! THE MAIL MECHANIC WAS REALLY SILLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I PLAYED WITH MY FRIEND AND I HAD A VERY GOOD TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAAY!!! I VIDEO LOVE GAMES!!!!!!!!!!

thanks for reading! im sure ill have more thoughts to share by the time i do the other routes, but like i said at the start, id like to just sit on my thoughts and let the game simmer for now. my overall opinion is that i thought it was good! not perfect by any means, but very very good. i'm sure i will revisit it someday. and by that i mean right now im gonna draw and watch a bit of saltydkdan's video of it before bed.

if you read this far tell me your favorite hot drink :) lately ive been really obsessed with like, this basic ass cinnamon/nutmeg/coriander chai from target. i put a little honey and cream in it and its like my favorite thing ever i have some every morning. i used to think i only liked fruity teas but my eyes have been truly opened.

[ot3]

finishing up fionna and cake... overall it was a fun ride but i really don't think it worked structurally. 6/10 show. i didnt think this was gonna be a long post but apparently i've got some thoughts. sticking below the cut

this last episode is kind of underwhelming... theres a couple of parts in this ep where they just sit and explain to the camera how simon realized betty was constantly sacrificing her own desires for simon and how simon wanted to put on the crown because he thought he didn't deserve to live. and it's not like those are bad realization for the show to come to but the show has very clearly established that it's intended for a more adult audience than the original adventure time, and so this kind of writing just feels really condescending when not directed at literal children. like yeah we could have figured this out from the writing, but. you didn't have to just tell us

i also didn't vibe with scarab as a villain, he felt super arbitrary to me. like they needed Something to be forcing them to move between dimensions, but i feel like scarab was an extremely meh choice for that. he wasn't particularly funny or interesting enough as a character to get to be one of the only people who showed up in every episode. i honestly think it would have been better if the existential threat these characters were facing was more of a force than a character, because it was already running so tight on time anyway it didn't really have the space to develop a good villain.

gary and marshall's screentime was another thing that i felt like is a huge waste of space. them doing their whole meet cute bakery au romance is something that's funny on paper but it's not compelling on its own and the only slight interest it has comes from our pre-existing investment in marceline and bubblegum's much more interesting dynamic. it didn't add anything to the overall arc of the show and took up time that could have been used to deliver more solidly on the core premise.

fionna and cake themselves were really cute but i don't feel like fionna's arc was as strong as it could have been. like ohhh yay shes come to love her normal world with all its imperfections.... obviously thats where it was going the whole time and once again. its not like i mind that ending. i just feel like they didn't do anything interesting with it. her character doesn't get to learn and progress as much as she's just marching down a straight path that we all already knows where it leads. i wish they would have just called the show 'Simon' so i wouldn't have to feel so disappointed in this.

adventure time has always been on the cutting edge of bizarre stuff in animation so the biggest let down overall with this show is how much when you strip away the Adventure Time coating of surrealist visuals on top of it it just feels like any other middling adventure cartoon. it didn't lean enough into the episodic structure to benefit from that the way the original show did, and it was too beholden on the episodic structure to linger on any of the parts that were actually compelling.

overall, the show feels like pandering to the adventure time fanbase, but in kind of a lazy way. Compare this to the distant land specials which I think were pandering in an excellent way. im not anti pandering by any means. The whirlwind tour through universes and characters that lifetime adventure time fans will recognize tries to come off as a love letter to the series, but instead just comes off as the adventure time version of that 'rejected ready player one theme song' video. remember farmworld? remember prismo? remember the vampire king? remember shermy and beth? remember Up a Tree? like. yeah. i do remember. thanks. do you have anything to say about any of this stuff or - oh. no. just showing me. got it.

its not someting i think i'll ever rewatch but at just ten eps definitely worth one watch through. theres some really good fun to be had in it and the art is gorgeous all the way through, it just fails to come together into a successful complete work.

[babumakeanart]

Here are some of my thoughts about Dragon age Veilguard. There is of course spoilers so read on your regard

I’m so excited we got another Dragon Age game! But do I adore Veilguard as much as the others in the series? Hard to say—I have very mixed feelings about it.

First of all, a lot of the lore we learned in earlier games feels erased or brushed aside here.

For instance, the choice of who drinks from the Veil of Sorrow seems diminished. Seeing Morrigan again wasn’t as thrilling as I’d hoped. Mostly, I kept asking, “Why are you here?” and “What do you mean you have Mythal in you?” She was relieved she didn’t drink from the Veil once she found out Mythal would control her if she did. And now, out of nowhere, she has that power anyway? Generally, I feel like previous choices don’t really matter. Everything feels so predetermined, even scripted, in terms of what will happen, what’s canon, and what isn’t. I get that BioWare had a lot of issues with this game’s development, especially shifting from multiplayer to single-player. But it still feels like many important choices from earlier games didn’t matter. For example, if Morrigan has a child with an archdemon’s soul in him, wouldn’t that mean—by the new lore—that the elven god bound with Urthemiel would still be alive? Didn’t the archdemons make the Evanuris immortal?

And while Rook is a fun and well-written character, I feel like the story should have continued with the Inquisitor. After all, we should get the chance to finish what they started. Even though it is said at the end of DA:I that Solas knows everything about us, the Inquisitor could still choose a new group to surprise him, but they should still lead them.

I did, however, love the ending for Solavellan. It brought closure, which was very very.. damn.. I cried. :’)

When it comes to our companions, I loved a lot of them—they’re all really cool. Yet I do have a few complaints that may be just my personal view but still. 

First, I’m not a fan of how Taash’s nonbinary identity was handled. As a nonbinary person myself, it felt somewhat disrespectful, as if it were written by someone who didn’t understand the experience. Initially, I was excited, but after reflecting, it started to irk me. I cant write all my thoughts well to say what all bothers me about it, other people put it much better into sentences than I would do so I am just leaving this.

I also wish there were more scenes to get to know these characters. There are a fair number of scenes, sure, but everyone seems overly friendly from the start and it didnt feel that they naturally get to know the main character, but that we already know each other for years. 

Despite the conflicts among some companions, there’s this vibe that everyone is just too nice. Does that make sense? Like, even during the Blight in Origins, some companions didn’t like each other and wouldn’t be buddy-buddy over a coffee date. In DA2, companions had strong beliefs that many times clashed, which made them unique. Veilguard feels too friendly—and not just the companions, but Rook and other NPCs as well.

Another minor issue: the romances are too short, which is sad. :(

But enough negativity! 

There’s still a ton of things I freaky love about Veilgaurd

The visuals! When first peek of this game came out I know some people didn’t like the look of it at all, but GOD is freaky stunning! The characters look great, with tons of little detail movements that make them feel alive. Mostly in expression.

 Every location you travel to is unique and beatutiful. I love running around just to take pictures. The cutscenes? Chef’s kiss. WOW

The fighting style was surprisingly enjoyable, too. I’d just finished DA:I

when Veilguard came out, so the adjustment took a minute, but I got into it quickly and ended up loving it. :)

And then, there’s SOLASSS. My poor man, my poor little egg—I love him, and I would die for him!

I loved all the companions’ personalities and stories. Just wish there was more of it.

Honestly, I cried multiple times during this game. :’D The ending was epic, the final battle gave me chills, and it was just...so cool! I could eat every pixel of these scnes.

One thing I would love to see: what would happen if you sided with Solas and tore down the veil. Even with different endings, the veil stays intact. I’d love to know what happens if it’s actually torn down. Would it end the world? Kill tons of people? Actaully realease the blight in full speed?

-

So far, that’s all I’ve got. I’m tired, and my brain’s fried, but I wanted to get my thoughts down. I know I wrote more criticisms than praise, but I really did enjoy the game. What did you all think? Because honestly, Veilguard has hyped me up to replay all the Dragon Age games again! And created all the ideas I have for my ocs in these games.

[claggorstuff]

Claggor taking care or helping take care of a really sick reader. Her fever is really high and she is completely delirious, when she sees him she just keep mumbling about how much she loves him and his adorable face :D!! I was just sick and I'm still feeling the crappy after effects of it. :] thank youuuu!

YURR!! WE LIT 🔥🔥🔥

Claggor helps sick and silly s/o

As I sat up, my head felt light and chalky, I could barely identify the room around me, head spinning. I waited to be able to stand and stumbled around before falling back onto the bed with a groan "wh..how.." I muttered and whined, laying back, hungry, but unable to get myself food, luckily I visit claggor every morning to talk, never missing a day. He knows I like schedule..

About an hour or so into my lay down, boiling yet freezing I heard my door open and through the cloud that filled my vision, I saw someone tall, burly.. possibly brunette.. it was him, he rushed to me holding my head up and I giggled and smiled, "There..yrrar.." he seemed upset in a way, "Hey. Hey are you okay..?!" I smiled and my head swayed in his hands, he set me down rubbing my cheek and pulling away.

Once he had adjusted me comfortably, I laid there tossing and murmering, staring at him as if he were the most incredible thing i'd ever saw, he pet my head trying to make me feel better with some affection. I giggled and muttered, "you're so pretty.. so pretty.. big hands..mm..cozy.." he chuckled and shook his head, standing up, "I'll try to find something for you.. sit tight. Dont move" He kissed my forehead.

I was quite warm so all I could do was sit there really. He left the room for no more than 10 or 20 minutes, and came back with some fish soup, being that the undercity had not much food, fish and some broth was the best he could find. Before feeding me he mad sure to give me some kind of cough syrup he'd found in one of the places vi had him ransack with the others.

It was bitter, I gagged and wrecthed which made him back up a bit, waiting for me to get it out, I never did and so he sat, spoonfeeding me the broth first, incase I decided to barf it up itd only be liquidy. I sipped it quietly and rubbed his hand as he fed me, he sighed and held one of my hands so I could fidget with it. The broth of the soup was warm and comforting, it ran down my throat like melted butter, but tasted so much better, it was quite obviously not a fish broth, but the fish inside didnt affect the taste it was like a turkey broth, or some kind of poultry.

Claggor watched me gobble down the broth as if I was a starving cat and chuckled, many thoughts ran through my head but all he saw was an adorably sick girl, and well. Once I got done with the broth he got the fish cut up with the spoon and fed it to me, it was chewy and strandy, it had soaked in the broth so i couldnt tell what kind of fish it was, at one point I paused, just muttering and murnuring.

"Yer so cute.. so sweet.. cutiepie.." he chuckled and waited until I was done blabbering, he rubbed my head and kissed my cheek, neck, and the back of my hand. "Hey.. I love you. Kay?" He smiled, "Mhmm.." I nodded, he chuckled and shook his head petting my shoulder, once he gave me another spoonfull of fish I tried to push it back to him and he looked away, "Nuh-uh babe. Im sorrry. But yer sick." I whined "noo..! You need food..! Pleaseee.." he tilted his head "I'll get my own bowl in a bit. I promise. I promise.." his words rang in my ears and I smiled, he knows I care, he knows I fear for him, his importance to me is great and vise versa, we love eachother.

As I finished my food he went to get himself a bowl, he'd left his goggles on the nightstand and I grabbed them swiftly, nuzzling the strap and cuddling them, once claggor came back he couldnt help but laugh at such a sight, me with his goggles acting as if they were him, cuddled up to them like a dog. He knew it was because I was sick, delirious, and he was comforting.. he came over and sat next to me on the bed eating, I watched and nuzzled his arm, rubbing the strap of the goggles and then the glass, I waited for him to finish knowing he'd wrap an arm around me, and of course, he did, such a warm feeling washed over me not the blistering warm I was feeling from my fever. But a nice, soft feeling.

As he massaged my lower back I melted into his arms, it was like heaven with all the sorwneas and aching,I hadnt even realized I was falling asleep, until I heard in a low, sweet tone, him say "sweet dreams.." with a gentle peck on my head. I smiled and drifted off, feeling much better than I had this morning..

[oddclangen]

40 Moon - Greenleaf part 2

40 moon p1 - 40 moon p3

Hazelgoat closes her eyes and soon the cold walls of the cave change to the warm wind of StarClan.

When she open her eyes the a familiar cat looking at her. Hazelgoat surprised that she can see him so clearly.

"Fleckglint who..." but before she can finish previous deputy interrupts her.

"You will learn about it later, dont worry," he smiles "for now i can't say a thing, nothing went as this cat planned after all."

Hazelgoat was confused by his statement, seems like something doesn't let Fleckglint tell her everything.

"Seems like am the one to start this one," Fleckglint continued, "kinda ironic when i think about it."

"Everything will be alright?" Hazelgoat nervously asks.

"It Should be," he tried to cheer her up with reassuring smile and the stepped forward. "i give you life for mercy, may you have it for friends and enemies."

Suddenly Hazelgoat felt how life rushed into her, barely able to stand she wasnt sure that she will be able to take all the lives before collapsing.

"It's must be hurd isnt it?"

Hazelgoat lifted her head, before now stood Softwillow. He looked at her with mix of pity and concern.

"Dont worry, not all lives would feel so bad" he continued, coming a bit closer. "I giving you life for bravery, you will need it to lead clan to the future."

Suddenly Hazelgoat felt much better, this live didnt bring any paint, but a sense of... relive? Maybe it's what Softwillow wants her to feel.

Whith small now he goes to the side to his father.

Next cat makes himself known vary quickly.

"Gosh you look terrible," Skyrain mewed with hir usual smug smile.

"Ah, well..." Hazelgoat didnt know what to say back, she really never was good at talking back at him.

Skyrain look became more sympathetic, "well what can you do a leader is a leader." he laughed to himself "You know what, i am going to give you life for certainty and you going to become a great leader alright?"

Hazelgoat awkwardly smiled as Skyrain pressed his nose to her head.

"And no wasting it okay?" Skyrain said before leaving to the side.

Hazelgoat respectfully noded wondering to herself how does it feels to loose a live while knowing you will return, not like she wanted to try.

"Is this the next leader?" She heard young voice from the side.

Three cats now stood in front of her two apprentices Riverpaw and Elmpaw, third one was Bluebellkit happily jumping around her.

"I go first, i go fist!" Bluebellkit jumped right in front of Hazelgoat, she could see that apprentices didnt really liked it, but couldn't object.

Proudly fluffing up his chest Bluebellkit said. "I Bluebellkit giving you life for hope, because it's cool!" then he quickly jumped back.

"Ha-ha so funny," sarcasticly remarked Elmpaw stepping forward. "i giving you live for instincts, because its something we should rely on."

Looking how Elmpaw stepping away, Hazelgoat couldn't help herself but think that maybe when thay found young apprentice body it the forest he couldnt rely on his instinct, and perished from some angry beast.

She was so deep in thoughts that didnt notice Riverpaw already in front of her, which made her jump a little.

"Dont worry," Riverpaw said, "Shystar told me if you would be unfit to lead a Clan you would not make it here.

This words didnt make Hazelgoat feel better, but Riverpaw didnt notice and continued.

" I am giving you life for justice, every leader need one like that."

With this words he slipped away making room for next cat.

She didnt recognize the next cat at first, after all Hazelgoat barely knew Wishfeather. She seemed calm and relaxed. Not wasting any time she dipped her head to Hazelgoat and said.

"I giving you life for sympathy, for cats of all places. dont worry will be done soon."

She smiled at Hazelgoat, and with small nod walked away.

Next cat was trying to not look directly Hazelgoat in the eyes.

She recognized Duzzlefuzz, maybe he was still feeling guilty over that rabbit? But that wasnt really his fault.

" I am going to make this quick, okay?" he was ready ti jump away at any time.

Hazelgoat noded, and Duzzlefuzz continues, "I giving you life for confidence, no matter what you think clan will do well with you as a leader."

Before Hazelgoat could say anything he jumped away.

"We almost done." Shystar appeared next to her.

"Is every leader ceremony so chaotic," Hazelgoat murmered.

"Well we can't really dwell on things do we?" She answered with a smile.

Shystar looked much younger then Hazelstar could ever remember. Maybe that a normal thing in StarClan?

"I am Shystar previous leader of our Clan giving you life for endurance in the face of Hardship." She looked at new leader with cetran confidence in her eyes, "From now on your name will be Hazelstar, guardian of our clan!"

Hazelstar could hear dozen of cats yowling her name in support. StarClan celebrating the new leader,

[throughtartaruswithyou]

PJO show review (because you care)

hmm I think the time has arrived for me to put my thoughts into words on this bad boy. Ive had some thoughts swirling around since the show finished but i felt like i needed to sit on them before putting them out into the big wide world.

I think the show was mid.

before we get up in arms- mid does not mean bad!! theres countless shows which are worse, and some that are better. honestly, mid means more interesting. lets do a good old fashion pros and cons list:

PROS

LOVED the casting. I think the casting was spot on- uncle rick did not disappoint in that category. age, appearance, demeanour, everything was working for me. I honestly agree with every single casting choice. (even lin-manual miranda ik ik)

Contrary to popular belief, I think the pacing was good. I'm not mad they cut scenes from the book. I think it'll encourage more people to read it. game of thrones did a similar thing (cut a bunch of scenes) and I think it helps preserve the independence of the two PJO mediums. Ya some scenes would've been cool but I'm not totally pissed about any cuts.

Set was good. set design felt authentic without trying too hard. No one really mentions the set when they review the show but like the set was really good?? CONS The biggest con for me is that it felt like they undercut Annabeth ALOT. shes supposed to be the wise girl, but for some reason sally was the one telling percy about the mythology? and hes telling it to annabeth? huh? and grover also seems way more knowledgeable than her. I was really disappointed by this theme- especially because it seemed to come up often. the only scene where she really showed her smarts was in the hephestus amusement park gate-trap thingy. it made her character seem under-powered compared to percy. Also she didnt use her dagger enough imo.

the show vs tell issue. this has been brought up alot so I wont go into it too much but ugh. I understand the show is aimed at kids but kids deserve good media too. kids aren't dumb. they can afford to let the episodes go a little longer to allow some of those plot points to build! give the watchers a sense of mystery then the satisfying feel of discovery! I noticed this especially in the lotus casino episode. I wish they didnt tell us about the lotus flowers right off the bat. the scene could have been so much better with that little change.

The delay on season 2! this isn't even just me being an impatient fan I have a genuine worry they actors are gonna age up too much. they all already look older and I just hope they wont have to age up the characters. esp for season 3- which they should get renewed ASAP since it should take place in the winter after season 2. not so much the teams fault but I hope they wont get too rushed by the timeline. esp since i know it's important to rick to have age-accurate casting.

overall I thought the show was mid to well-done and if season 1 is the worst season we might have a great lil' show on our hands. also disney pls renew season 3!!!! i pinky promise i'll watch it.

[help-is-on-the-way]

Ive finally reread the Lemonade Mouth book and i have feelings. This may be long.

Ive watched the movie countless times since i was like 12, it has always been one of my favorite disney movies. I had their songs in my mp3 and at school i liked carrying my house keys around so i could pretend i was Wen in Turn Up The Music. Anyway. Ive always known it was a story adapted from a book. I remember buying it when i was like 16 after watching the movie for the bajillionth time. I never finished it. I remember the different POVs threw me off a bit and the language didnt make it any easier (english isnt my first language and the book has never been translated). My bookmarker said i made it to page 152. But i honestly did Not remember at all like 90% of the changes. So im like pretty sure i read it without Actually reading.

Anyway. Now im 24 and i rewatched the movie 3 nights in a row this week. And im way more well versed in english nowadays. So i decided to give the book another shot. Now, like i said, i have feelings. I read the whole thing in 2 nights. Im not sure what im doing right now and im sure im overexplaining things, as i usually do. But well. I think i wanna say some stuff.

First of all, after reading the book i can confidently say the movie is a pretty amazing adaptation. Ive always known that, but like, now i have undisputable proof. The way they made the story flow in just under 2 hours always baffled me. They got like 7 character stories going on and it never feels too much. And the changes from the book are mostly all understandable, and some of them i even like way better in the movie in my opinion. I mean. Except their appearances changes. I love Bridget Mendler as much as the next guy, but .. Fat Olivia wouldve been so cool to see. Especially considering the movie/book themes.

I remember whenever i rewatched the movie as a 18 year old and onwards, i always thought something along the lines of. Wow. For a movie all about revolution, and being a freak, and not conforming to the social mold, and being a minority in an elitist society - the lack of queer related stuff is so Loud. I guess it always disappointed me. Not that we are necessarily freaks, but well. Im sure we all felt like it at some point. I remember being angry about it, then. But i get it. Of course i always did, in a way. It was 2011 and it was disney. And im not stupid either. Stella is a glaringly obvious lgbt subtext allegory - maybe its the Hayley Kyoko in her, but they all knew what they were doing, i think. I can see that. Its subtext. I just cant help it but feel a bit disappointed that it isnt text too. I kinda always secretly hoped the book had something more in this subject. Dont get me wrong. Stella's character in the book manages to be even more marvellous than in the movie (an impressive feat). I was in shock that she was written explicitly and diagnosed with dyslexia and ADHD. Being a different but similar kind of neurodivergent myself, that was really cool and genuinely surprised me, as ive always related to the feeling dumb sentiments she has. But, you know. Still kinda made me sad. You could make the argument that she didnt need a romantic arc or whatever, cause she was going through a lot, blablabla. And, yeah. I agree with you. She was going through a lot. Thats kinda the point though. All five of them were. Its the whole point of their characters. Theyre all going through their own personal stuff and they got school problems on top of it - the band and their music is an answer to all of it. Im not saying she needed a girlfriend or anything. She didnt, and her character is one of the most fleshed out ones. I just cant help but wish.

Which then brings me to my next point. Honestly. I feel like the book had a lot more romance going on than the movie. In parts it was really sweet, and in others kind of annoying. The movie always made it very clear that Mo and Charlie wouldnt be a thing, and i come from that reality and mentality. So imagine my surprise when they are actually a thing by the end of the book. Idk. Ive always disliked Scott, and hated that he got in the band and played with them at the Madison Square Garden by the end. He never felt like one of the band, he never felt like a lemonade mouth. I dont think he ever really understood their struggles as freaks. At least not in my eyes. So he always felt a bit undeserving of his spot. He's there because of Mo, for Mo and Mo only. He's even more of an asshole in the book, so im glad hes not really brought up again after he tries to apologize and Mo says she isnt interested. I really like that this is what happens in the book. I might be too much of a Scott hater, but, yeah. I do like it. I dont think Mo shouldve gotten with Scott in the movie either. But i also dont think she shouldve gotten with Charlie, is the point. Sure, Charlie's character in the book actually puts in the effort to get to know Mo, he is sweet, he makes her feel listened to, and he tries to learn about her heritage and culture. He does not feel like hes in love with the idea of Mo (aside the first few POVs of him) (he quickly grows from that when they become proper friends). He loves her for her. And thats something i dont feel like it happens with movie-Charlie.

In fact, im gonna go in a bit of tangent here, i feel like movie-Charlie is the most not-book character of them all. Hes got the most background change, and most of the time he isnt seem doing much (most of his scenes were passed on to Wen - going with Stella to ask about the lemonade machine, being the one that's approached by Lyle when he sells the Lemonade Mouth Live at the Bash CDs, etc). When theyre deciding if they should become a band or not at the pizzaria, his coin flip in the book matters because thats heavily tied to his way of seeing the world and the universe. Tied to his belief that hes the wrong brother to have survived, so Aaron (heads) also deserves a chance to choose his actions for him, just as much as Charlie himself (tails) does. And thats explored time and time again over the pages. Its incredibly interesting and original. When they get rid of his dead twin brother, and build up a living-in-the-shadow-of-a-perfect-older-brother backstory for him, the coin flip just seems like hes an undecisive guy, who doesnt have a good reason to say No, but also not to say Yes either. And while thats fine, i guess... it just doesnt hold the same value narratively speaking. It just feels more shallow, like hes simply a more laid back guy - and although that is consistent, it just couldve been so much more. I do like movie-Charlie, but book-Charlie is way more interesting. His book appearance is more fitting too. Hes described as a regular chubby guy with unruly hair. I like that.

Anyway, back to the romance thing. Its fine i guess. Im mostly against Mo x Charlie in the book because it just kinda feels weird after watching the movie for 12 years. I liked the "friendzone" arc. Its nice when a boy and a girl can just be friends in media, no ulterior motives behind it (though that doesnt really happen between them either) (we see that more with Stella and the boys). Also because idk im not a huge fan of how Mo eventually came around and confessed to Charlie in the book. I know that theyre 14 but Charlie was still hurt by what she had said, and though she did apologize and admited that she screwed up, i feel like i wouldve liked it more if she explained to him what was going on through her head better. Like if she had explained to him what she had explained to the reader, that she was too preoccupied desesperately chasing after a future that doesnt belong to her, it kinda wouldve made it a lot better for me. Cause Charlie said multiple times that he was confused by the whole thing, and still hurt, but they kinda ignored that and kissed twice. And that was it, they were dating now. But then again, if they were able to express themselves that well, they wouldnt be 14 year olds.

And then on the other side of the romantic things going on theres Wen and Olivia. Ive always liked them as a couple since i was a kid. And their moments in the book were pretty fucking good. I love the subtle ways in which Wen slowly begins to pay more attention to her, and notice how his feelings toward her change, even though he doesnt really understand what they are. I lost my mind when in the beginning he described her eyes as a simple brown, but the next time it happens he sees that it has hints of yellow as well. And their fight scene ?!?!??!! Bro !!! The peak-ism of it all..... the way Wen crosses the street without Olivia, and theyre shouting while on different opposing sidewalks, with cars going between them, a clear and visual indication of this rift they suddenly found themselves in, and how sometimes they can think in opposite ways. Its so good. Hurts so well. And it gives more of a reason for Olivia to lose her voice as well, cause she had to yell over the noise and stuff. While in the movie she lost her voice over yelling two sentences while they were 2 meters away from each other, which always striked me as odd.

Speaking of which i feel like i have so much to say about Olivia, and at the same time so little. I honestly dont know which i prefer better, movie-Olivia or book-Olivia. From a poetic and creative standpoint, i really like that Olivia's POV throughout the book is told solely through her letters to her dad (+ Naomi at the end). Its very charming. But at the same time it also kinda feels like it hurts her characterization a bit in places. She tells stuff through a letter format to her dad, so at times it feels like she is withholding stuff while at the same time saying Much More than a 14 year old would say to their dad. And, granted, that does say a lot about her as a character, but you know. The point of different POVs is to explore the characters more. But because shes stuck telling the events to her dad, i dont feel like shes explored enough, it almost feels like shes only allowed to be his daughter - and it also feels forced at times when she tells stuff to him that i know just needs to be said for plot reasons. Which is a bit sad. I have the feeling that it is intentional, but idk. I feel like after 336 pages i still barely know her. We mostly get to know about her through other people - we basically only see Olivia [daughter] and Olivia [quiet friend]. I wanna see Olivia, dammit!!! It kinda sucks cause i love her and the book did not answer the questions i had about her. Shes the main singer, for goodness' sake !!!! And in the book nobody else sings besides her too.

This paragraph from one of Mo's POV kinda sums it all. Im stuck in a fence trying to understand if thats a good thing or not, when shes still a mystery even to the reader, only a 100 pages away from the end of the book. I want to know whats going on in her head so badly.

The exerpt kinda brings me to another point, slightly connected to the romance thing. The girls barely interact with each other. Of course we know they all become friends, and by the time the Halloween Bash is over and Nancy dies, Wen is already describing them all as a family in his POV. So we know they are all closer than they were before. From this point on they always describe themselves as friends, when before there was always an uncertainty over their relationship. But like, getting to my original point. The girls' interaction is scarce. Mo and Stella have the fight scene in the beginning, when the band first tried to make things work and they butted heads during practice. And then they get a descriptive paragraph soon after of the two of them having fun while reading a magazine and coloring the pictures with a pen after practice. After that, all of Mo's scenes are with Charlie, Naomi, or the other 4 as a band (or her dad). At the end Wen mentions that Mo gives him the "shovel talk" so he doesnt hurt Olivia by dating her. But we never get to see Mo and Olivia properly interacting one on one. The shovel talk isnt effective if i dont know the lengths that Mo would go for Olivia. I guess its fine narratively speaking, but like. I wanna see, you know. Olivia's scenes are even worse, theyre all either with Wen or the whole band. Olivia has more scenes with Sydney than with the other girls in her band. And its not just the girls, Wen and Charlie also never interact with each other. I feel like the focus in romance is greatly to blame for this. The movie lacks on this too, dont get me wrong. But its easier to convey their closeness to each other when there's a visual representation of them happening in front of my eyes and i can See them all interacting in between themselves without dialogue. Like Wen and Charlie singing the jingle of Rising Star together when they were in detention, or later on the two of them walking around school together. Or Mo hugging Olivia and standing close to her after Nancy died and More Than a Band happens. The whole More Than a Band scene actually, cause it kinda becomes a "silent" montage of them having fun together. Or having Wen with Stella when she realizes the actions of her consequences and suddenly the whole school knows shes the one responsible for cutting Mudslide Crush's set for the Bash in half. You know what i mean ?? As a big fan of found family i just kinda wish there was more of the rest of the relationships between the 5 of them. And in the book thats especially jarring. Which kinda goes back into the thing i said about Olivia's POV.

She wont write about these details to her dad. The only time she wrote in detail about a conversation was when she fought with Wen, cause she was venting about it to her dad. So we're kinda missing out on a POV that Could help bridge the band together in a way for the reader to see more clearly. Cause its obvious they love each other and theyre family, but we dont get to see much How exactly that happens. The cloud watching scene is like the main bonding moment in between the group and practically the only one we get to participate in. And it's not from Olivia's POV, it never is. Her cat died and we're told what happens through Wen's eyes. She has a "nervous attack" before the Halloween Bash to the point of puking and we're told what happens through Random Girl #6 That Just So Happens to Be Hiding and Eavesdropping in The Next Stall Over. She takes the band to see her dad in prison (a pretty big deal to everyone envolved) and, again, we're told through Wen's eyes. I wanna know what she was thinking !!!!! Cause its obvious it was hard for her to do that, and she had to prepare herself before even telling them where exactly they were going. What was going on through her head, then ?? Was she scared ?? Was she nervous ?? Was she thinking that maybe they wouldnt be her friends anymore because of it ????? We will never know, i can only assume stuff !!!!!!! And its really kinda frustrating. I wanna know for sure.

In the movie, Olivia's mom died when she was really young (young enough to not remember her face), and her dad "made bad decisions because of it". The way she talks about it makes it seem that immediately after her mom died, her father got into trouble with the law. So like her dad has been gone idk 12 years or something. She doesn't know him, doesn't know her mom. We're never told what exactly he did, and i kinda always got the impression that it was something bad, something that Olivia kinda resented him by, at least a little bit. I know she simply stated that she never wrote him back cause she didnt know what to say to him, cause he was basically a stranger to her. But you know. I feel thats enough to resent somebody, cause maybe she doesnt even know what he did either. If something like this happened in my family, i probably wouldnt know either. Not until i was like 22 and my aunt spilled the story while drunk during Christmas. The point is: its not the type of thing you tell a child - it's the type of thing the child quietly accepts as just a part of their normal life. So, at the end, she decides to give him a chance by writing a letter to him. I quite like that cause she was kinda doing the same thing that she fought Wen about. He never gave Sydney a chance, and she had never given her father a chance either. I like hypocrisy in characters cause it makes them complex. It makes the fight more interesting as well, cause otherwise its just suffering Olympics. And it hurts Olivia's character in my eyes cause thats really annoying and pointless. But interpreting it this way i can make more sense of it.

Book-Olivia, on the other hand. Her mother didn't die, she simply left. Olivia also does not remember her face. Her mom and dad had a teen pregnancy, the mom had drug problems and the dad already had minor criminal records. Mom left when she was 1. And her dad was a good father to her until she was 8. And she remembers that he was a good father. He had dreams of being an english teacher. And then he got fired from his taxi driving job, couldnt get another because of his past felonies, fell into old habits, and accidentally caused an old man to have a heart attack while attempting robbery with a toy gun. So he's in jail. And Olivia knows this stuff because she remembers. She was old enough to ask questions, to demand answers when her loving father suddenly wasn't coming home anymore. So she writes letters to him all the time, she keeps him updated on her life cause she knows he would like to be present, but can't. She also knows he made mistakes, and isnt looking for excuses for him. But he's a good father too. And she trusts him a lot. He's the person she trusts most in the world. So when she invites the band to visit him, she's trusting them as well.

Theyre similar backstories but also so different. Theres things i like about both. The Sydney-dad parallels in the movie are pretty good. Its what really sells it to me. The book's scene of the band visiting dad in prison is fantastic. I feel like the movie did a good job translating the book and adaptating Olivia's backstory. I quite like that the whole movie is Olivia's letter to her dad, telling him about her band. It's a pretty good way to tie her to her POVs from the book. ..I dont remember where i was going with this, honestly. I like Olivia. I may like movie-Olivia more just because, like i said, the hypocrisy makes her more complex. And book-Olivia is unfortunately a mystery i cant solve.

Mo's story is also pretty good in both. I feel like the only significant difference between book-Mo and movie-Mo is that Naomi's whole character is gone. So is her family owned store and the obvious religious references and practices, and Mo is seen doing less extracurriculars. So the illness she contracts before Rising Star in the movie feels less like a burn out and more like a really unfortunate coincidence - which lowkey sucks cause the burn out she feels is essential to Mo finally understanding that she cant keep overworking herself like this, which ultimately results into her coming to terms with the fact that she cant plan her whole future and expect it to not go wrong at some point. Cause that burned out Mo isnt the real Mo. Which then leads her to her confronting her dad. I understand why they cut Naomi out, but the fact that Mo had a pretty good friend before the band makes so much sense. She doesnt really struggle socially, its more that she has a family influenced plan for her future, and doesnt have time for other stuff (doesnt let herself have time for other stuff, especially after Scott). Mo in the book and in the movie do not feel like two different characters, it's more that the book has bonus content of the same girl. Its nice. Same thing with Stella and lowkey Wen, i think. And because of it i dont have much to say about Mo. Shes like Stella in the way that shes a very fleshed out character. Everything she does make sense. I highly recommend the book only for her POVs cause it touches her religion, faith and heritage in ways disney could never do cause theyre cowards. It really enriches her character. I love that even though she doesnt see eye to eye with her father, she still went and prayed with him. She doesn't hate her culture nor her religion. She values her family a lot and its especially telling in the book. I feel like thats a bit harder to see with movie-Mo.

Wen also feels like pretty much the same guy. In the movie they cut his pointless popular social hierarchy chase and replaced it with self absorbed jokes, which is important characterization nonetheless cause it tells the viewer that Wen isnt really insecure. In fact, id say he is very confident in himself. If he could, he wouldve named the band Wen. I dont think he is as confident in the book, but he also isnt trying to be someone he isnt, and you gotta be confident enough for that. He never tried to change who he is; he knows he is a weird guy but he thinks he still can be popular and That could work in his favor if he plays his cards right. But, through no fault of his own, he couldnt play them and thats why he fell so hard down the social hierarchy ladder. And he isnt happy about that. The Sydney situation in the book is a bit different from the movie, and way more awkward. Wen is described as being in love with her and the photographs he accidentally brought to school with him were Sydney's self portrait nude drawings. Its a very uncomfortable situation to everyone involved, including me that had to read and imagine it. I personally prefer the movie version of this cause it minimally touches Wen's problems with his mom leaving them behind and the impact it had on him. Sydney bothers movie-Wen so much because her presence is sudden, everywhere, and to him she's trying to replace something she could never be - his real mom. So he's angry and he lashes out. Thats way more interesting to me than having a teenage boy crush on your dad's 26 year old girlfriend. But i do like that he eventually realizes he grew out of it when Sydney starts treating him more "motherly" - fussing over his injury and offering him leftovers. It slightly-but-not-really touches the 'replacing his mom' role Sydney could have. Idk. Again, i like my characters when theyre more complex. Sure, the crushing on your dad's girlfriend brought him quite a lot of guilt, and that was a positive to me for his complexity's sake, but i feel like we already know so little about Wen's biological mom and how that affects him as is. Both in the movies and in the book, we're only told that she left them. Literally only that. I guess one could interpret it as she leaving them cause of a potential death, but i personally always saw it as abandonment. And something like that is ALWAYS gonna affect a child. At least movie-Wen touches a bit on how that affects Wen, and i like that.

Also wouldve it killed disney to give Wen his fucking glasses ?! Thats literally all thats different from his movie and book appearances and that kinda hurts a lil bit. Well, despite that Adam Hicks is kinda ginger and Wen is described as blond. But i dont think that matters much.

I guess to sum all this "character study" stuff up.

• Same character as in the movie but with bonus content: Mo and Stella.

• Movie has a different interpretation of the same character: Olivia.

• Movie and book got completely different characters they might as well have different names: Charlie. (and they do have different last names)

• Wen: Wen.

I do love the movie's songs cause theyre all a BANGER and i grew up listening to them. I just wish the book somehow had a CD built-in with their songs. Just so i could know what they sound like cause its REALLY hard to imagine. Especially cause the book gives us some song lyrics as well.

Anyway. Now to talk about the band itself. The book is interesting cause they all use unusual instruments: Stella plays an ukelele (she does know how to play electric guitar, but she ditches it for the sake of the band); Charlie's got a bunch of bongos and im-assuming-at-least-some-drum-plate-thingies; Wen plays the trumpet; Mo plays the big bass instrument that i forgot the name of; and Olivia sometimes plays an accordion + her voice. Olivia is also the only singer. I really like this cause its yet another reminder that those kids are weird. And thats CHARMING as hell !!! It kinda makes me sad that the movie didnt embrace these instruments cause im really fucking curious to how theyd sound together. Like, really, thats a big complaint of mine. Its such a weird mix of instruments that i really wish i could listen to them - its frustrating, even. I feel like that could change me as a person. Cause thats what so magical about them as a band. By all accounts they should not work well together, but they do somehow. Their instruments are a visual and soundful (?) (thats definitely not a word) representation of their weird friendship, its a reflection of it. Theyre all really different people but they somehow work well together. Theyre a family. And you cant separate them cause together theyre an unstoppable revolution.

One thing i really did Not like about the movie after having Book Hindsight, is the way the band reacts to Stella and the lemonade machine situation. In the movie it really feels sometimes that Stella is the only one that cares about that. Especially during the jail scene. I do love the Turn Up The Music callback but i HATE that they all blame Stella so blatantly and they never properly apologize. While in the book theyre ALL in this together, theyre fighting for what they believe in, and they never fault her for calling them and making them come to the school. Cause they all know its not just about the lemonade machine. Charlie does say in the book that "its just a stupid lemonade machine, Stella" but we know he doesnt really believe in that because of his thiughts. Its a half-hearted statement cause he might know its a lost cause but we Know he's worried as well, we know he doesnt mean it. But, at least to me, in the movie when they say stuff like that it really does feel like they dont care, sometimes. Especially when theyre in jail. And it kinda really fucking sucks. Its the main fucking theme of the book/movie !!!!!!! The lemonade machine matters cause it symbolyzes THEM !!!!! Its in their band name !!!!! And when they lose the machine they dont even feel like fighting for the band anymore !!!!!! Thats how much it bothers them that the machine is gone !!!!!

I think im gonna reread that part and rewatch the movie and come back to this actually. So i can judge and hate on this particular movie choice with more arguments.

[silencedloves]

Hi I just finished reading Not yours with Steve Harrington and my heart 🤧, I was wondering if you could do a part 2 where Steve gets reader back and fluff 🤍

Love Always

Pairing: Steve Harrington x female!reader

Warnings: Swearing, and fluff :)

Pronouns: She/her

A/n: I hope you enjoy this and thank you for requesting a part 2! It means a lot ♥️

Part 1 Part 2

It feels like years and years have gone by since Steve has seen you, but in reality it’s been a few months. He’s tried to avoid your spots like the mall, parks, video store, so he doesn’t run into you which was hard to do.

You on the other hand didnt try to avoid him, wanting to see how he is. Though Steve couldn’t handle to see you, it would break him, if he sees you he would run up to you and fall to his knees, beg for forgiveness. But he doesn’t want to do that, not for him but for you, you deserve better at least that’s what he thinks.

He’s actually gone by your house multiple times wanting to see you talked to you, so many times has he stood by your front door debating to knock your door. He never ended up having the nerve and just leaving.

~

Steve was hanging out with his friends at the mall those friends that you told him were not good for him, those friends that you told him made him someone he wasn’t, those friends that made him and asshole.

He couldn’t just drop them they are all he had now. You were all he had that mattered in his life and now you’re gone so he’s clinging on whatever he can so he won’t be alone, he can’t handle being alone and so more not right now.

Steve was so deep in his thoughts he didn’t mean to bump into someone but he did.

“Hey watch it!” I girl yelled as she walked away with a sour face and Steve softly apologizes, shaking his head trying to focus more and not daydream. He heard a laugh beside him and felt and arm drop around his shoulders pulling him in.

“Come on Steve! Stop being such a downer.” Tommy said as he smirks at Steve. Steve just chuckles not knowing what to say.

“Hey” Tommy whispers to Steve as he looks at Carol and Nicole who are walking in front of them talking to eachother. Steve simply answers with a “mhm?” “If you really want to get over that bitch just take Nicole .” Steve quickly furrows his brows and puts an angry face at the sound of the name calling Tommy just did to you. Though Tommy is too stupid to connect the dots and realize that Steve was uncomfortable and just continued to joke around. He chuckled and said “She’ll come back crawling to you, you know?” He continued blabbing his mouth.

Steve felt anger bubbling up and was clenching his teeth together. “And if she doesn’t it’s alright, she wasn’t all that anyways, she’s just another stupid bitch, you can get anyone else that’ll be better than her.” He laughs and pats Steve’s shoulder, his arm still hanging around him.

Steve then pushes him off which caught him off guard and fell. “Dude what the hell!”

With that the girls stopped walking and turned around facing them now.

“Tommy for once in your life shut your damn mouth!” Steve yells at him as he peers over, Tommy still on the ground.

“Hey Steve what’s your problem!” Carol joins in walking toward them and going next to Tommy helping him up.

“You’re all assholes that’s my problem!” He was finally starting to break. With all this ruckus going on there we’re people glancing at them and gossiping.

As Tommy got up he walked up to Steve “Are you serious right now man?” He said angrily at his face

“Yeah I’m serious you shouldn’t have said that!” Steve yelled at his face and pushed Tommy again, he stumbled back and seemed furious.

“You mean call her out for what she really is?” He growled while he flailed his arms out and nodded his head up. “That’s funny I don’t remember you asking me to stop.” He tilted his head to the side and shrugged his shoulders.

Steve clenched his teeth so tightly it felt as if they might shatter, his hands balling into fists as he dug his nails into his skin.

“I should’ve shoved my foot right up your ass” he gritted through clenched teeth

“What the hell Steve!” Carol once again tried to join in

Steve looked at her then Tommy with an annoyed face. “You know neither of you ever cared about her. You never even liked her, because she not miserable like you two. She is the opposite from what you guys are and a better person in so many ways you guys aren't.”

“A slut with a heart of gold!” Carol said sarcastically with a fake smile.

“I told you to watch your damn mouth!” Steve yelled as he pointed his finger at her.

“Hey!” Tommy pushes Steve back “I don’t know what’s gotten into you man but you don’t talk to her that way!” As soon as Steve was gonna say something a new voice joined in.

“Well someone has to.” Steve recognized your voice and swears he melted at the sound. Tommy also looked over with a mischievous smile and takes a step back from Steve “The famous y/n.”

Y/n looks to Tommy and Carol “I suggest you guys leave.” Carol steps towards you and says “Or what?”

You take a step closer to her “You think you’re some badasss chick? Or you need me to remind you what happened when you and your little friend group tried something on me huh?” You look her up and down.

She says nothing and bites the inside of her cheek turning away and standing beside Tommy.

Tommy then scoffs and looks at Steve “Pathetic.” He turned away to walk away. Steve got so fed up already that tiny word was just it to make him all riled up he stepped towards him ready to fight him until he felt someone grab his hand. He stopped and turned his head, it was you. “Don’t” you whisper

And all his anger washed away his shoulders relaxed and his hand wasn’t balled up in a fist anymore. You held his eye contact then looked at Tommy and Carol walk away with Nicole telling them to wait up for her. Steve followed your view of eyesight.

“You don’t need them anymore.” Y/n said as she reached her hand up to his chin turning him towards her. Everything inside of Steve that he kept hidden away, all the emotions came crashing down. You see his eyes water as you guys look at each other, your hand cups his cheek as your other one doesn’t let go of his hand.

Steve let’s put a soft sob his head dropping, putting his forehead to yours. He closes his eyes tears coming down his cheek. Your presence, your touch, your voice makes him crumble, he feels vulnerable with you and that’s okay.

You whisper to him “it’s okay” you read his mind, he wants to apologize but his throat is all closed up. He shook his head saying ‘no’ and he drops his head to the crook of your neck.

The hand that was on his cheek is now on the back of his head going up and down in a soothing matter.

“I’m sorry..” he finally got it out and wants to say it as many times as he can. He is clinging on to you for dear life, his arms wrapped around your body. “I’m so so so sorry.” He keeps repeating it and you keep saying “it’s okay.”

You let Steve cry in your arms. People around you already not caring about the scene you’re making.

In a few minutes you feel Steve’s head lift up and he looks at you with watery eyes. You reach up again and wipe the tears off his face, and you use both hands to brush away his hair from his face, dropping your hands to cup his face. He smiles a bit and tightens his arms that are around your waist. You smile back at him.

“Remember I’ll always love you.” Steve says with all sincerity.

You bring Steve closer to you, caressing his cheek. “And I love you.” Steve smiles and sees a tear roll down your cheek. “It’s okay..” he whispers and you slightly laugh. He kisses your cheek and you both go in for a kiss on the lips. Missing the feeling both of you want to stay there forever. You with your hands on his face try to bring him closer as if there were still space between you. When you broke apart Steve said. “You we’re right, I was an asshole, and I was an asshole to you.”

He put his hands on yours that were on his face and took them off, interlocking with both of them.

“But I’ll be better, because I have you.” He looks at you with such love and admiration. And you giggle, as you reach up to his face and started to plant kisses all over him. And he doesn’t protest, you then run off dragging him along with your hand on his.

“Where are we going?” He asks with a smile, “We’re gonna get ice cream!” You say as you hear him chuckle.

“Hey I was wondering what happened between you and Carol?” Steve asked as he remembered what you said to Carol about being a badass chick. You run faster to the ice cream shop and laugh. “I’ll tell ya when I get my ice cream!” Steve laughs at your actions and is happy with you.

He is happy, he is happy to be with you, to speak with you to have you again.

[suffarustuffaru]

actually here’s an interesting question that’s been in my head for a hot minute now: what do you think a crusch if/other faction if would look like?

one of my favorite characters has always been crusch (probably my favorite aside from julius?), and interestingly it was the moment after the battle of the white whale that sold her for me- her convo with subaru was so genuine and full of respect and it since then has stood out amongst my favorites since it’s one of the first times subaru outside of the emilia camp was recognized for his decisions ^_^

it also piqued my interest because there’s definitely implications/said somewhere that if subaru met crusch first he’d choose her, which makes me think about how that dynamic would play out, ya know? like we haven’t really gotten a huge expansion on crusch herself as we have with anastasia/pricilla and soon felt

also a crusch: if would toootally have different relationships defining wilhelm & felix too and basically everyone else lol

love ur analyses keep up da good work fam!!!!!!!

YO its cool seeing a crusch fan around :DD !! also thank you very much for liking my analysis posts pfft. also whew….. ive been writing my answer for this ask on and off for a while hah its super long oops wkdndnsn

but ok its super interesting to hear what drew you to crusch in the first place - crusch is a character im definitely interested in (i would LOVE to see her finally expanded upon!!) and shes such a respectable person for sure <3 and you definitely have a point that its one of the first time subaru outside of the emilia camp was recognized!! though i didnt know that there were implications that if subaru met crusch first he'd choose her - i suppose that makes sense in that subaru really respects and likes crusch, and hes such a moldable character - for lack of a better term - bc its sooo easy for him to go in all sorts of different directions. a crusch if is an interesting possibility and im sure it absolutely wouldve happened in some form in some other universe :O !!

alright. as for a crusch if - yeah youre right, thered be such a different dynamic between subaru, the crusch camp, and everyone around them. :o im not Entirely sure how a crusch if would go but i certainly have ideas!!! though im not sure if im entirely an expert on them given i still havent finished the wilhelm-centric ex novels or read many crusch camp stories, but i did read ex 1 and 4 and enjoyed them quite a lot <3 along with you know, the main route. but i do really like the crusch camp and i hope theyre expanded upon eventually.

gonna put More thoughts under the cut (note that i have a Lot of opinions on the crusch camp hah):

ok first of all. i think that the crusch camp Does have a little wasted potential in canon and i think that crusch if is the perfect opportunity to explore Everything with crusch camp. just in the sense that you know, crusch hasnt been expanded upon just yet. not that felt has been expanded upon much either but at least we get a lot of details about her and her whole backstory with being a member of the royal family + her relationship with rom opens itself up to a lot of possibilities (theres a lot of History going around in the felt camp regarding felt, reinhard, carol and grimm, rom, etc being in the same camp given their family connections, demihuman war history, etc).

and not that we Dont get details about crusch of course, but i feel that even in her Own centric content, shes a little overshadowed by Everyone else sometimes. like i WANT to focus more on crusch as a person!! she gets cool moments yeah, but as much as i enjoyed reading ex1 im forever gonna be salty that her plot in ex1 was like about people having problems with her gender expression (ill go into this again later bc i know its connected to that plot point of crusch as a noble leader vs crusch as. a woman.) for more than half the runtime and everyone around her was discussing about what to do with her. and then in main route shes put through the RINGER between being cut down by gluttony, having her memories erased, and the dragon blood in arc 5 - and yet it STILL feels like the story doesnt focus enough on HER own pain. how is SHE feeling about this????? shes getting her shit rocked left and right and her sense of identity is being shaken along with it (see: her becoming more shy and withdrawn after her memories are gone) and yet i feel like we STILL dont hear about her Directly enough T^T

and also i Dont like that in the main route, the crusch camps connections to the royal family (with wilhelm being assigned to aid the royal family and bc of that heinkel was assigned to the white whale and so theresia went in heinkels stead + ferris and crusch's relationships with fourier) ARENT that explored. esp when like felt comes into play publically in arc 3 and the crusch camp BARELY REACTS. YOU THINK THEY WOULD REACT MORE TO FELT BEING HERE AND REINHARD SPONSORING FELT. its especially kind of painful after you read ex1 and its like ?? so why didnt they react more to felt being there??? related to + looking exactly like crusch and ferris's dead boyfriend, nonetheless, esp when their goal is to kill the dragon bc the royal family all died as far as they knew and NOW theres someone in the royal family that actually lived???? whos a rival for the throne now??? also i feel like the potential of like. ferris and wilhelms dynamic isnt explored either. like i have to wonder how they seem like theyre on decent/good terms in canon when ferris is friends with reinhard, wilhelms role in the demihuman war, and also wilhelm fucking up his family (with ferris being Aware of a lot of reinhards family situation, of course). and also of course wilhelm has Things going on with rom and carol and grimm bc demihuman war... ex novel things...

so like i think that inherently the crusch and felt camps ARE kind of sort of intertwined in this way bc of ALL these reasons. so i think if youre exploring crusch camp content all of this SHOULD be acknowledged. or maybe thats the felt camp fan in me talking but i DO GENUINELY THINK THE CRUSCH AND FELT CAMPS ARE CONNECTED A LOT ☝️☝️☝️

and so ok back to crusch if things!!!! i have no idea how the Exact plot goes but like i think this is all very dependent on how the crusch if divergence even starts. which Makes sense but yeah :o i mean i feel like i can only see it happening right from the get go in arc 1. and also this goes with what you said - if subaru met them first he'd probs choose to join them. but tbh i also kinda sort of like the possibility that maybe at least Some of arc 1 still happened in another font so subaru can be like "yeah lol this blond girl with red eyes was there along with this giant dude and t -" and crusch and ferris are thinking "OK IT COULD BE ANY RANDOM GIRL WITH BLOND HAIR AND RED EYES THATS NOT A COMPLETE GUARANTEE ITS SOMEONE FROM THE ROYAL FAMILY RIGHT??" and also wilhelms gonna vaguely go "hey whats this giants name again....." anyway yeah gotta plant those seeds for future plot things???? yes. also its a good segue into subaru learning more crusch camp related history yes. maybe that (subarus arc 1 info) is what allows him to join crusch camp too????? yeah im having trouble brainstorming ideas on how he even joins the camp but im guessing its a “subaru accidentally stumbles across stuff and crusch camp is like well i guess we just Kinda have to let you in……. like taking pity on a stray kitten…… maybe youll be useful… and also we do pity you a bit yeah you seem very lost” thing. 👍👍👍

(or alternatively you could have subaru branch off into crusch camp at arc 3 or smth given hes like actually physically at their place and away from emilia camp now but at the same time i doubt that could even happen given the position he was in arc 3???? like post-royal selection drama?? yeah i dont really see it happening imo HAH)

anyway. yeah so its like. inevitably subaru is gonna figure out you know the history behind all of the others in the crusch camp. like whether thats by doing his own research - especially bc you know wilhelm, crusch, ferris are all very well known by this point and have all kinds of rumors and info on them flying around - and also like. by getting closer with everyone. i think that if subaru joined crusch camp early, either he knows hes got rbd bc of arc 1 and manages to avoid it for a while, is my guess, given crusch camp doesnt get involved in life threatening things until. the white whale.

but until then i think subarus probably not gonna die. and i think hes probs gonna be in Fear of that happening again, maybe he blocks out a bit of arc 1 some more bc ahhaah i havent died or anything in so long so surely that never happened. maybe he tries to tell crusch once he gets closer with her or maybe he doesnt try at all bc hahaha did that even happen???? or maybe he asks her about her dp and if its Only about truths from that persons pov rather than Fact and shes like "yeah no its personal truths only, so even if someone is completely wrong about a fact but Believes it wholeheartedly its still gonna register as the truth" and hes like FUCK ok. smth like that?? yes. gotta give him inner turmoil even when hes not actively in danger. bc he Would have that yes. but either way i think he’d be curious and wanna know the specifics of her dp anyway!!!

yeah so anyway the white whale happens and subarus whole shit gets wrecked oops.... and my guess is that you know hes gonna loop a whole shit ton of times and its gonna be complete and utter hell for him. but also this is kind of a little bit dependent on how exactly the royal selection goes for him - but i HIGHLY doubt itd go the same as canon. i doubt he’d even make a scene, tbh—i mean assuming subaru joins crusch camp very early somehow, between crusch and ferris and wilhelm the three of them are gonna Really whip him into shape. metaphorically beat his s1 flaws out of him. bc like—i mean in canon subaru Did learn and grow yes, but he didnt Have to learn everything so harshly (ok but canon subaru Did have to get beat in the duel though or he wouldve died skcbsnd but i still think that subaru can still learn the same lessons more Gently whenever possible. hes a normal teenage boy trying his best!!). i think crusch camp would be good for him in this way, i mean crusch is a very duty-focused person and ferris and wilhelm are blunt people. ferris especially is not gonna take any bullshit wkdndnd (ESPECIALLY when subaru could humiliate crusch and the entire camp) and wilhelm sees himself in subaru and is gonna go “ah…….. you should. not act like that. let me train you.” and ALSO im a firm believer and enjoyer in the reinhard-ferris-julius friendship and i think that reinhard ESPECIALLY must have communicated with crusch camp about felt before arc 3, otherwise crusch camp wouldve had a stronger reaction to felts grand entrance into the royal selection. also if subarus getting closer to crusch camp then of course he figures out stuff like the reinhard-ferris-julius friendship.

again not entirely sure about specific plot beats but depending on how things go emilia camp may or may not get royally fucked (as an emilia camp enjoyer im very saddened by this 😔) but i DO feel like subaru would still be sympathetic towards them in a crusch if. and also theres Definitely gonna be at least one loop during arc 3 where the white whale Does erase crusch and wilhelm and ferris goes insane (like how they end up in pride if. yeah.) so subaru gets to see the consequences if they lose to the white whale. but i DO think that the final loop should still have the consequences of crusch being targeted by gluttony and losing her memories. its interesting to explore!!! especially if subaru himself still becomes a victim of gluttony in some way—maybe they both become victims of gluttony there?? or it happens to subaru later?? and i feel like arc 5 is Definitely another opportunity for some crazy looping. for sure.

also roswaal may want to try some shit bc Why is subaru in another camp this is not according to plan. so more opportunities to torture subaru 👍👍👍 and also crusch camp in canon keeps taking one L after another so you know. familiar territory in terms of how subaru and co are doing 😭😭😭😭

but anyway. i think a crusch camp and felt camp alliance (or Almost alliance?) is in order bc. well we know subaru he tries to fix things. hes nosy. he learns eventually All the crusch camp history and is like ok so why arent we allies with felt camp at least for rn??? like urging wilhelm to make it up with reinhard and such, etc etc. and crusch and felt are the candidates that are both Very deeply unsatisfied with the current system of lugunica and want to remake everything to be better!! and also like. how does ferris even feel about wilhelm. i lowkey want crusch if to have a plot beat where ferris-crusch-subaru metaphorically beat up wilhelm for being Terrible. actually scratch lowkey i want highkey. and i think crusch is just like yeah sorry i do respect you in a lot of ways wilhelm and youre a very key member in our camp and i appreciate it but also fighting against demihumans in the demihuman war + being awful to your family was definitely. 😬 ESPECIALLY since she grew up with ferris too okay. she and her dad literally took in ferris after being stuck in a basement for the first nine years of his life. and while ferris and reinhards family situations are Very Different, the common thread is generational trauma and Passed Down abilities/traits that also relate to the trauma so. i feel like ferris at Least has some secret strong feelings about wilhelm ok i dont care what tappei has to say on this (actually i do care but i will care less if tappei has a bad take on this bc ferris and reinhard are FRIENDS + WILHELM WAS WRONG FOR THE DEMIHUMAN WAR ok ferris was horribly abused also bc of fantasy racism).

and alright ok im gonna talk about some more crusch-ferris-subaru dynamics bc subaru and wilhelm are most likely gonna fall into their weird grandson-grandfather dynamic again. especially now that subarus in crusch camp.

so—gender expression. the way crusch-ferris-subaru dress and their relationships with this part of their identities. personally i hc all three of them as nonbinary but of course u can have different hcs/opinions than me :o either way though, gender expression is Very important to all three of them and its given focus in the plot multiple times so im gonna try to examine how its handled in canon a bit!! theres this one bit from the arc 5 wn that i think about a lot:

so you know, subaru has his internalized issues, toxic masculinity for one, so hes struggling with like. being a man but also like he genuinely enjoys crossdressing but also hes been judged for it in the past and he has?? complicated feelings on it. hes struggling with his identity and who he is in many many different ways and gender is one key aspect of it. and then he comes along and crusch and ferris BASICALLY challenge him and his internalized ideas on it—crusch being a woman who dresses more masculine and ferris being a man who dresses more feminine. they challenge even the fantasy world’s society too—crusch more so, bc shes a woman and in the public eye due to her family and shes expected to dress and behave the way a noblewoman should. more feminine. but she refuses which is a point of contention in ex1 of course…

ferris seems to get less scrutiny from the public on this (at least for This exact reason, we only see subaru iirc judge him for it on screen) but my guess is bc he 1. can easily pass as a girl and 2. he has other more Noticeable traits to the public (having the Blue title and being demihuman for example). but also theres another aspect to ferris and its that he also dresses femininely to represent “the feminine side crusch lacks” iirc…. which. to be quite frank thats. that feels a little odd to me but anyway im gonna choose to look into it a bit regardless bc i think it could potentially be interesting maybe?? but also the fourier-crusch duel in ex1 already felt off to me wkfndnd it was such a fun scene but like??? why are we policing what crusch wants to wear??? but. anyway.

so about ferris being “the feminine side crusch lacks”……. ferris and crusch's gender expression are completely opposite, ferris being feminine of course and crusch being masculine. ferris and crusch are very much like each others equal halves in canon - you dont find one without the other, theyre basically a pair (especially given they fit together into this perfect trio with fourier and now fouriers gone :(( ). ferris and crusch balance each other out in a lot of ways, especially given ferris's mischevious yet perceptive personality and crusch being more serious but a bit airheaded with emotional matters. and also both of them being more blunt honest people. so like their gender expression balances each other out bc theyre opposites. ferris wants to keep balancing out crusch, whos so focused on duty that her needs and her desires and emotions sometimes go by the wayside (id personally attribute at least a tiny bit of her airheadedness with emotions to this too - when you have so much responsibilities to attend to, your emotions often take a backseat. especially when you take into account people judging crusch for how she expresses herself....).

but also ferris does note that "because crusch-sama said this suits ferris, what i am, i am, and this most suits the radiance of ferris' soul. crusch-samas words, ferris will repay with everything that i am". im gonna interpret this as crusch recognizing that ferris truly likes to express his appearance in a feminine way and providing ferris with the means and support to do so, especially since crusch herself growing up also prefers to express herself as opposite to her biological sex and also bc crusch and her family took in ferris so they grew up together. which i think is very sweet <3

and also more regarding crusch, in canon she expresses herself more femininely after getting her memories wiped by gluttony........... i think there might (emphasis on Might) be vaguely a kind of "feminine=weak and masculine=strong thats why crusch goes back to being feminine after memories gone" undertone if you choose to see it that way but im Electing to ignore it. i think crusch's change in expression post-gluttony though like emphasizes how her identity gets shaken after her memories are erased. she was a confident person before and now shes more timid and withdrawn bc she isnt sure of herself or her abilities anymore :(( which is definitely smth that should be explored in Any crusch camp centric content, i think.

anyway. yeah also i def think the ferris-crusch-subaru gender things should be explored. its already briefly touched on in canon with stuff like that arc 5 wn snippet i shared, but i do think subaru being friends with ferris and crusch will help him with confidence regarding how he likes to express himself as well. which i think would be very sweet to explore <3 (sorry this briefly derailed into a ferris-crusch-subaru gender expression analysis but this part of their characters is important i feel aljdlfjsldfj and its SUCH good parallel between them)

as for general dynamics stuff between the three of them. i think ferris is on the fence about subaru at first and goes from "hes an idiot..." to "hes an idiot <3" i have no specific thoughts on this at the moment thats just the vibe thats probably happening. maybe a bit of the same with crusch but yes im sure crusch and ferris of course grow to respect subaru, and im sure they notice pretty quick that subaru wears his emotions on his sleeve. hes an honest person in almost all things, or at least he tries to be, unless hes being held at gunpoint to keep things secret bc rbd lajdlfjl. and we Know subaru is a very respectable person whos Really good at heart, he just had all these hurdles to get through. and also - subaru is a tiny bit similar to fourier in terms of like Loud, Passionate, Determined, kind of an idiot in a few ways but a Lovable one, that sort of thing. of course ferris and crusch are VERY MUCH not going to be replacing fourier. absolutely not they would never in a million years. but fourier like Really fit in with ferris and crusch bc of the three of them having different personality traits, so i think subaru would fit well with ferris and crusch for similar reasons. if that makes sense. the energies just match up. ferris and subaru particularly bring a lot of fun and lightheartedness and ease weight on crusch’s shoulders, crusch supports them both, and all three of them reel each other in in different ways <3

ok also regarding any romance............ personally i dont see the appeal of crusch x subaru but thats just me lajsdlfjls and also my heart got stolen by fourier x ferris x crusch oops. plus i do enjoy the ferris and subaru + subaru and crusch friendship possibilities. but if anyones reading this and is a fan of crusch x subaru feel free to send me propaganda for it bc im very curious as to what makes you really like the ship <3

yeah so anyway. this has been my extremely long explanation as to how crusch if could maybe go and also all sorts of stuff id love to see explored when it comes to crusch if or crusch camp centered content in general <3 its hard to tell how a crusch if would go further down the line bc you know, the more that changes from main route the more things go Different, but i think its fascinating to think about. hope this kind of answered your question op? :O :D !!

ok but as for other camps. i have absolutely no clue how itd go but ana camp would Definitely have to involve subaru trying to invent things that carry on from earth and such and felt camp Absolutely involves more trying to solve more astrea drama. no specific thoughts on this yet (ALSO I STILL HAVENT CAUGHT UP ON ANA CAMP SIDE STORIES... ONE DAY. I SWEAR.) but you know, lots of interesting possibilities here!! :O

[aprocessionofthoughts]

What to Believe

ailesswhumptober23 day 30- coma fandom- Danny phantom TW- none summary- Danny wakes from a coma only to be told he's been in a coma since the accident. But things aren't quite lining up.

ao3 masterlist

When Danny woke up he heard the insistent beeping of his alarm. But when he opened his eyes he didnt’ recognize the ceiling. It wasn't covered in glow in the dark stars like his room. And now that he thought about it, he had broken his alarm last week and hadn’t gotten a replacement.

“Danny? Oh, sweetie you’re awake!” His mother leaned over him. “What?” Danny managed to say, his throat was parched.

“Oh, sweetie.” his mother was crying. Why was she crying? “I’m so happy you’re awake. I’ll call your father, he’s at home right now, but he’ll come right over when he hears you’re awake.” She started to turn away.

“Wait–” Danny needed to know what was happening. Everything was fuzzy. He couldn’t remember what had happened before he had gotten… wherever here was.

“I’ll explain later, sweetie, you need to rest right now.”

“Mom.” Danny’s voice wobbled and his mother’s face crumpled.

She cupped his face with her hand. “You’ve been in a coma. We didn’t know if… we didn’t know if you would wake up.”

Danny’s mind went blank for a moment. A coma? What had caused him to go into a coma. He couldn’t remember. The last thing he remembered was going to school and hoping Lacere would extend the due date for their paper. “How long?” he finally managed.

“It’s been two years.”

“Oh.”

She smiled at him, but her eyes were wet with tears. “I’ll go call your father. I’ll be right back.”

She left and Danny heard the door open and close.

What could have happened? Was it a ghost fight? Did his parents know?

Just then his mother walked in.

“Where are we?” 

“You’re in the hospital in Elmerton. We had to transfer you here because Amity didn’t have the right facilities.”

“And what happened?”

She bit her lip. “There was an accident.  You went into the portal and it shocked you.”

What? It had been nearly a year since the portal accident. Right?

“But that was almost a year ago. I was fine after that.”

Her eyes widened, “I don’t know what you’re talking about, sweetie. We came home and found you unconscious and the portal on. You’ve been unresponsive ever since.”

That couldn’t be right. He remembered waking up, finding out he was part ghost. That was all true. Right?

“But I remember–”

“They say sometimes coma patients have realistic dreams. That when they wake up, they don’t always realize they’ve been dreaming. But that’s okay. Once you’re better, we’ll take you home. And everything will be perfect again.”

Danny didn’t know what to think His memories, dreams?, seemed too real to be fake. But why would his mother lie? What other explanation could there be?

“Okay. Will we go home soon?”

She smiled. “We can probably go home in a week, once they finish checking you over.”

Once she went back out to talk to the doctors, Danny laid back. What was the truth? The thing was, he couldn’t feel his ghost half. But if he really concentrated there also felt like there was something missing.

He remembered coming home from school. Then… something. Things were fuzzy no matter how much he concentrated.

But how could he check? He looked around the room and saw that his mom had left her phone on the bedside table. He reached over and turned it on.

He stared at the date until the screen turned itself off.

He closed  his eyes. It had been nearly two years since the last thing he remembered. But that was after the portal. He supposed, if you were counting from the portal it would be closer to two years. But that didn’t feel right.

He hesitated for a moment and glanced at the door. Then slowly he lifted his shirt.

There was a scar on his chest right over where his core used to be

What had they done?

AN: This is a no one knows au in which when Danny’s parents found out they tried to ‘fix’ him. They kept him unconscious as they figured out a cure. Eventually they figured out how to remove his core, but this led to him being in a coma. They took him to the hospital and said the wound was because of a lab accident, where he had fallen and impaled himself with a sharp tool and then hit his head.

[saltynsassy31]

no cus i totally understand your frustration, ive also quit splatfests for the moment until they get an overhaul

i suggest if you feel close to getting hateful to either shiver or shiver fans then maybe quit for a while for your own sake cus ive felt a lot better after doing so, im still really sensitive to negative comments towards frye or rude ones about shiver winning but taking some time for myself has made me feel infinitely better

ive been close to hating shiver before bc of how cocky and rude them and their fans can be but it doesnt really do anything but sour your enjoyment of the game more, so its really not worth it

i do have to say though, anyone who says "its just a game" reaaally needs to understand the frustration of people OTHER than them, sympathy is something a lot of people forget about when it comes to things that arent real life. just because it doesnt affect you doesnt mean everyone can shut off their attachment to the game or a character like a light switch; a lot of the time you dont know whats going on with them. i myself am really attached to frye cus i am hashtag autism creature and he brings me comfort, so anyone being rude to me about shiver winning really REALLY gets under my skin. its not entirely (if they were serious, if they werent then its not at all) their fault, but nintendo fixing the frustration of splatfests constantly keeling in one direction (which theyre supposed to do anyways but they havent) would definitely fix the issue. we need to find a way to have nintendo fix this, not attack anyone else for what bundle of pixels and text theyre attached to.

not everyone has really thick skin and if we want splatoon 3 to be more hospitable then we should try to cut down on the general splatfest bullassery in public spaces (being overly cocky and rude/blaming others in a way with no basis or truth behind it). its not something everyone can always do since we arent all perfect, but if we make steps in that direction then we could help more people enjoy the splatoon community rather than being eaten up by toxicity and spite

i didnt word all of this entirely correctly so like interpret ad best as you can cus im eepy but yeah.

a fye for u to enjoy (also ur anon is off btw)

u dont have to but for the sake of not being harrassed id appreciate if u didnt tag with public tags

👏👏 PREACH

I don't want to quit playing it, I do enjoy splatfests, to a certain extent, i like going with my friends and i made a lot of new friends through it, it's like, the online community that I'm having a problem with

I don't hate shiver, I thought I did but I can't, she is still a comfort character (tho Frye is like, my obsession besides being my comfort character cuz I am also part part the 'tism XD), in a way, I like her dynamic with the group at least, she annoys me, yes, very much so, but I don't hate her

And I don't hate people who like her either

Who I do hate is people being mean about it, I had turned off anon cuz of a stupid person who was going around every frye support account anonymously just saying mean stuff and praising shiver as the best, I just forgot to turn it on, so thanks for reminding me 😅

Saying that "It's just a game" is so annoying to, tell that to the football fans, they go just as crazy if not more so

Splatfests are ment to be fun! You should be able to enjoy the splatfest without having to worry about people fighting

I don't like fighting with people, I hate how angry I become, how mean I can sound sometimes, I usually just vent without interacting

At least she won in Japan, so that is one other win under her belt, I just wish she'd win more in the future 😔

Oh also I almost didn't participate in this splatfest either and I did only because I haven't had time to play and I haven't finished my catalogue yet 😅 I usually use splatfests to up my catalogue quicker lmao

Also, don't worry, I won't tag anything that could get you harassed, if anything does happen, please block for your health, I don't want anything happening to you, you seem very sweet ;w;

Edit: also YOUR FRYE PLUSH IS SO CUTE! I've been seeing people get her but idk where to buy her!!!! Where'd you get it? :0

[sumbreon]

more book thoughts

the shops back up you can now buy these books

ive not read anymore yet, using it to bribe myself into doing laundry but ive been stewing on things. this will be even less coherent cause im just gonna throw my thoughts out here as they come to me unlike before where we had a mild focus

what is machas plan here? turning up as félix to fuck with islin about cypress like what was the intent there because i doubt it had the intended effect with islin going 'it should be me courting you félix!' which also islin my man... ya coulda!!! oh no i just remembered hesper signed the fuckin courting card or whatever with a little paw print really good! the whole thing with cypress is really good too honestly. the pacing for after félix gives bowman (françois) the ultimatum was so good it felt like so long not being in félixs pov and seeing it from bowmans i was absolutely losing it like let me into that little bastards head again what the fuck is going on??? to then finally get his pov again and just... i dont think that could have been done any better it fuckin killed me. anyway macha clearly still wanting to fuck with félixs boys but tamer than in the first book but what for? im also both dreading and looking forward to whenever they and félix meet like its your bosses new little guy vs its the fucker who tried to kill your friends (maybe? dont know for sure that macha intended for anyone to die but they definitely could have/almost did!) so fucking with islin by being félix and fucking with bowman by attacking rangers as a viper tbh even less clear on how that ones meant to a work out whats gained from turning the rangers against the viper? whats esks relationship with the rangers? cain made a comment to bowman after the whole graveyard incident and what did you mean by that man? whats your damn deal macha?

also every bowman chapter is accompanied by the mild apprehension of 'there was a warning for intentional misgendering its probably gonna be against bowman' who the fucks gonna do that to my boy? and i love that esks general response to bowman having to avoid saying hes the supposedly dead mercier girl is why is this even an issue. esk continues to not be helpful! but i am delighted by bowman and esk throughout this book so far me everytime its bowman time:

to be clear im having a good time, bowman less so. still makes me laugh that esk referred to félix as 'the pony'. and i loved that little scene on the train with félix and esk about félixs body and i think esk was maybe already aware? when the supposed viper attacked the rangers esk says a powerful black horse could maybe do that and says félix couldnt do that being so young a black horse? wonder just how much of esk not being helpful is being a bit of an ass and if any of its lingering effects from being stuck in that trophy room? god that was a horrifying scene and from what we see of tua it affected the weapons badly, esk wasnt there as long but it was still there

senca... girl whats your angle here? what sort of game is this to you? what are you getting out of it? i believe her when she tells esk that shes on the boys's side but im still not 100% trusting her

just how many times has léa threatened to cut bowmans dick off? enough that félix didnt let her finish the suggestion. and i keep thinking about léa telling félix about bowman not counting it as cheating with félix specifically like could you boys make this any more complicated? how the hell is félix meant to deal with that info? also made me think of that post where a girl had been having gay sex with her friend for like a decade and was like sex with her doesnt count and it ended with her saying to her boyfriend if it was cheating shes cheating on her friend with him then and not the other way around (i might try and find that post again. ill probably fail)

okay laundry done i might come back and add more or i might not