#which makes me wanna CRY
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ultimately!
#ELIIIIIIII YOU CANT SAY THAT ELIIIIIIIIIIII#audiof from not even emily latest video go watch literally its so fuckingfunny#dont even ask me how eli fits in hance' 5'2 dad's clothes pls ok#my art#digital art#oc art#anthro art#not even gonna lie i thfought i wasnt gonan finish this but we pulled thru#if quality gets murdered i will cry#swhy are all my favorite drawings baby sugar and eliyah interacting#i like themb#i was gonna add fucking comical cartoon slipping noises when her antler popped off but imovie literalsly. it didnt work it wpuldnt let me#vid too biggy#also noahs ark esque announcement for ppl thta read my evil ramble tags i miiight nuke sanguinary univers bc i love my ocs too much to like#like i dont wanna marry my first idea and i love them too much to box them into a project I PERSONALLY FEEL LIKE I FUMBLED LIKE#OK LITERALLY NO INSULT WHATSOEVER TO ANYONE WHO MIGHT LIKE IT BUT IT WAS my firsy ever comic and i feeeeel like i can do betteeerrr a#meowweooww#like if it was small things i wanted to change i could juts panel edit but its like. major things like when i started chapter 1 i had#LITERALLY NO PLAN JUST MY nerdy vampire obsession. which is still present. giggle h#breaking news boygirl learns that they arent rlly proudof the writing in comic thye started when they were a teenager#ALSO I LITERALLY HAVE LORE THAT IVE. BEEN MAKING THAT CONTRADICTS THINGS (? PROBABLY) SO ok trust me ok just trust m#also yes this is what i’ve been working on except that animatsuon i mentioned with eli crying because priorities or someth#not except wtf i mean insyead or some other shit#also i just looked at this wall of text on mobile and like ew shut up little gay
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jay went to clown school. let’s talk about that
#art by me#jrwi riptide#jay ferin#i was drawing wherever the wind took me#and it took me to clown school jay#the best destination i could’ve hoped for#i feel like so much could be explored or expanded there in fanon#but i barely see anything#welp if there is none make some#sound off in the comments if you ever think about how jay rarely retracts into herself when faced with conflict#but instead goes to clown school or hitches a ride with the loserest boy she can find#and it’s the rare (and most impactful) moments when she responds differently#shutting down after the phone call with her grandmother#or blowing up after learning about lizzie and ava#or crying as she’s told to shoot her friend in the chest#but the every day conflict almost always gets humor as a response#which leads to very out of pocket moments but we love jay for it#oooooough jay ferin the way you express emotions is so important to meeeee#ALSO the fact that often it’s insult based humor or overly confident in self humor#let’s dissect that jay how do you relate to your friends in the hierarchical structure of the navy academy#did you feel like your humor had to subtly place you at the top? or you would not be enough? jay?#your relationship with kira hinges on fixing this structure by being better than it hm? let’s talk about that#let’s talk about how your life centered a lot around being the best even if not directly or intentionally#should i do a full analysis on this?#i kinda wanna do a full analysis on this#jrwi
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⚠️Vote for whomever YOU DO NOT KNOW⚠️‼️
#ultimate obscure blorbo#polls#Round I#Tomcat Disposables#Will wood#That song makes me cry everytime#which is interesing because if you don't know what the song is about and don't pay too much attention to the lyrics it isn't *that* sad#but yeah if you wanna sob look up what the song is about then listen as you read along to the lyrics#The Myojin of Blooming Dawn#Magic: the Gathering#magic the gathering#mtg
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The design of the kitten orphans in Marleybone really is just. the distillation of "pathetic little meow meow"
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first amv be nicies to me about it or else
#qktalks#new hobby found ! achievement get#there was a lyric at the very start of this song (that i cut out bc it was slow and i wanted it to be a bit crazier)#that says ''i can't seem to stay me'' which was sorta the origin of why i picked this one#so there ya go#the first half is a lil rough ngl.i recognize this and if u make fun of me ill cry right on ur person#i thought i hated editing but it turns out once u have a halfway decent editing program the process Doesn't make u wanna cry#i have another song in mind but im not sure there's rly enough footage of what i want for it ... hrrmm#mob psycho 100#mob psycho#mp100#shigeo kageyama#mp100 mob#mp100 shigeo#flashing#<- dunno if it's necessary but just to be sure#i do kinda like that amvs take way less time than most of my other hobbies#like art takes forever building anything in any game takes centuries writing can take a long time depending on the length#but u can kinda just whip up an amv in one sitting if u know what ur doing#i Didn't know what i was doing when making This so it took me a couple days but ! now i know the basics of the program so yay
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horror has KR dust can't be affected by KR unless it's by another version of himself. horror's (somehow) still a judge dust wants repentance for his wrongdoings,,,, someone must see where i'm going with this
i just wanna imagine like if dust ever feels like he's doing something wrong (like having thoughts about gaining LV again or something,,,,) he'll just ask horror to give him like. a quick little punch. hit him with a bone fragment because he needs to feel his sins crawling on his back from a true judge,,,,
and then horror's more than happy to do it 😁😁😁 he winds that shit up before he bitch slaps dust :33 oh you need to be judged DONT WORRY DUST horror is a totally impartial judge that totally won't find your situation both ridiculous and entertaining 😁😁
#something something this can totally be morphed into a more toxic dynamic#dust keeps asking to get hit.... horror totally agrees#but yk he feels BAD because of course he'd feel bad he still has some sort of fucked up morals#buuuut then again dust IS asking for it.... and he's saying that it'll improve himself!! AND ok maybe horror likes seeing him beat up SO WH#dust thinks that he needs this to stop the thoughts that he has and accidentally slipping into the LV grind mindset#and horror's nice (?) enough to do it!! dust isnt doing this to fufill his own hatred of himself. THIS IS TO IMPROVE HIMSELF!!!!#and also maaaaybe just an eensy bit so he can give horror that mental struggle abt dust since he always thinks that he's better than hin#i'm sorry i cant do toxicity if its not equal on both ends i HATE IT when toxic relationships have like.... 100/0 toxicity in them#i've been LOCKED IN TODAY with writing what the hell#me when i write more than 3 words after not writing since fucking MAY of this year#yeaaaah its soooo fun detailing how i think the trio met eachother#(i am dreading the part where i have to make dust and horror meet killer but ill deal w it later)#i have ideas...... i have bountiful ideas....... i only fear that i write something that none of these 3 would do or say or think..........#ill totally post the dust and horror sections once im done with horror's#but once again..... i fear of killer's section...... i will probably cry during it slash half joking#idk bc i dont want horror's part to be disproportionately longer than dusts.......#and killer's will probably be EVEN LONGER!!! which i DONT like#UGH is it so bad to just want killer to experiment on horror and dust the minute he sees them for the first time IS IT IS IT SO BAD#and then dust and horror have a little mini fight about who gets to be named sans :3333#AND THEN I WANNA GIVE THEM CUTE LITTLE TEMPORARY NICKNAMES UNTIL THEY GET TO SMTH NEW :33333#because killer would know their coded names but horrortale residents wouldnt. horror gets to be named red and dust purple!!! YIPPEE!!!!!!!!#horror cant do more than just ONE hit because dust's KR would probably affect him massively#the og hit is just like 6 dmg and then the KR lasts for like 20 seconds and then dust's at 3/99 HP 💀#tricule hc#horror sans#dust sans#murder time trio#utmv#sans au#horrordust is so silly my favorite pair of mildly tense abt eachother yet surface level friendly frenemies!!! YES!!!!! I LOVE HRDT!!!! ❤️💜
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tgese pictures haunt me every day what the fuck was this for theres no reason for this to behappening im so scared
#all of the results when k reverse image search r for bill and ted and i jsut wanna ask why#and if they arent then what are they. why. what.#but i think theyve only been in like one otherovie together and it doesnt seem like something that would need. this.#i might delete this later not knowing the source of something with real people in it makes me feel weird indont wanna come off as like#being weird about the actors themselves trust me i couldnt care less about them.#im just haunted by the possibility of these being for bill and ted because like what in amy if those movies warrants. this.#jello shut up challenge#OKAY I FOUND YHE ARTICLE IT IS THEM. IT IS PROMO FOR BILL AND TED. WHY.#crying real actual tears what the fuck#bill and ted#bill s preston esquire#ted theodore logan#should. should i be tagging this as the cahracters i dotb fucking know im not used to posting about actors this is scary i dont like it#ive only ever hyperfixated on fictonal like. animated guys. or real people. not live action characters. dont like it#ohhhh my god this is so much talking sorry#bill and teds excellent adventure#bill and teds bogus journey#i dont. i dunno which movie this was promo for. so both it is
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Hospital Playlist (2020) Ep.3
Dir. Shin Won Ho
#hospital playlist#hospitalplaylistedit#kdramaedit#asiandramaedit#*gifs#april.gif#tw: flashing gif#the 99z my comfort squad#giffing (my favorite drama) is healing#had wanted to gif this scene for a while because kim junwan is lyfe#the thing with an ott show is that i need to seek other video source to gif a certain scene which quality just makes me wanna cry
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ramble about ur favs i wanna hear abt ur thoughts -zaptrap
HAN’S INFODUMPING ABOUT JAY... START!!!!
so like sgdkdhdkdhd I say Jay and Lloyd are my “favorites” but honestly it’s so hard to pick favorites out of this skittles squad like I love EVERY character for a variety of different reasons. I was going to also infodump about Lloyd but then I started talking about Prime Empire and then this post got. Long. So. it's just Jay I may infodump about Lloyd another day especially since I'm very Conduit Brained Rn but yea yea!
this is long so i'm putting most of it under the cut so y'all don't kill me for making a huge long post
I considered putting Zane and Sora on here as well since I’d also consider them my “favs” but like this is already gonna be. A lot of. Infodumping (also i typed THIS part before I even started and decided not to yell about Lloyd because this already got long enough). Maybe I’ll make a separate post for those two hmm hmm much to consider but for now MY (technically) FAVORITE NINJAGO CHARACTER: JAY WALKER
THE SPARKPLUG WHO INVADED MY BRAIN LIKE A PARASITE
so hey his name is a pun this makes me laugh ridiculously hard every time I remember he is named. After a misdemeanor HSKSHDKFH
Jay is such an interesting case of a character for me because I started out the show not liking him. Which is. Stares at my entire account I think my feelings have changed somewhat
Jay starts out as an asshole I don’t think anyone can disagree with me there (although honestly they’re all assholes in early ninjago they bullied a ten year old and left him dangling several feet off the ground) but over the course of the show you can see him start developing into a much more interesting character. He goes from being so insecure he's faking everything about himself to someone who knows who he is and is so genuine about it
now yea we could argue about whether his character was too uwu-ified post-season 10 but this is the FUN HAN POST SO WE'RE NOT GONNA TALK ABOUT THAT the point is you can SEE the growth that Jay has gone through and I am going to show you that growth through what I call
✨ The Skybound to Prime Empire Effect ✨
I AM SO PASSIONATE ABOUT THE IDEA THAT PRIME EMPIRE WAS WRITTEN TO BE A DIRECT PARALLEL OF SKYBOUND AND WAS CENTERED ON SHOWING HOW THE NINJA ESPECIALLY JAY HAVE GROWN THROUGHOUT THE SEASON
when season 12 rolls around we are at the point in Jay's development where he is CONFIDENT in who he is. He's a fun-loving jokester with the power of lightning and the drive to help people whenever he can. He uses jokes and humor to help alleviate tension and get people through whatever's happening. And when on his own what does he do?
BECOME AN ENTERTAINER BABEY
i like to think jay's club in prime empire was a safe haven for anyone stuck in the game who figured out hey. we Can't Leave and felt freaked about it. Also Jay would generally try and spread the word that hey something ISN'T RIGHT HERE which would lead people to want to stay with him
(totally plugging my friend's fic but this kind of thing is explored in would you like to enter prime empire by @finn-m-corvex y'all should check it out cool cool)
also the prime empire shorts which i watched all of in the midst of typing this video cuz i love them go watch them please please please jay was publically fighting the red visors which I imagine may have raised some red flags for some players
THIS SOMEHOW TURNED INTO PRIME EMPIRE INFODUMPING LMAO ANYWAYS Jay's confident! He becomes an entertainer because it's who he knows he is! And it's something that will get people hyped and having fun, which is very in-character for Jay to do! He uses those kinds of things to mask the Bad Things going on and get people remembering what's good
I've talked about this sort of thing before but that's Jay's whole philosophy as early as season 9! Which is a DIRECT contrast to how he views it in season 6, as Nadakhan puts it scarily accurately
"You make jokes to mask the fact that you're afraid"
(i was gonna grab a screenshot for that like i did with the hunted scene but netflix has bloCKED THE ABILITY TO TAKE SCREENSHOTS THE WAY I USED TO and i don't have them already and i'm too lazy to grab them from elsewhere so alas trust me he says it)
making jokes to hide your fear and using humor to remind yourself of what's good and coping with the bad are two VERY different outlooks on it
so I think this outlook is what drives him to make this glamrock persona in the first place - this is a bad situation, one he's in with other civilians, and what better way to keep him and themself safe until the others get there than throwing a big performance at a safe place!
also it's just so gender okay I want to look like Superstar Rockin' Jay so badly
it's also interesting to see his outlook on his parents change over time! In season six he finds out Ed and Edna aren't his birth parents and feels upset about it, not understanding why his birth parents would've abandoned him. In season twelve, that outlook changing is EXACTLY why Jay's able to get through to Unagami
"I was abandoned by my parents, too!... I never understood why, and I never had the chance to even ask. But I always hoped there was a good reason. What if there's a reason?"
(again curse you netflix i wanted SCREENSHOTS whatever whatever)
It's this scene that gets Unagami to calm down long enough for Milton Dyer to get there, and presumably is what stops him from just. Flattening him and Jay like a pancake.
to piggyback off of this i absolutely adore how Unagami and Jay consider each other adopted brothers in that one book I still haven't read and I hope he's in Dragons Rising at some point Unagami is my favorite "villain" (no longer a villain) in the whole show he deserves more screentime
like this is where i found out about this and it's plagued my mind ever since. i need to read. this book just for them
SO YEA OKAY Prime Empire is "Who is Jay as a Person Post-Skybound" to me also it opens up so many fascinating things about Jay. I rest my case
so backpedaling a little bit. JAY CARES SO MUCH ABOUT HIS PARENTS GUYS IT'S SO SOFT AND I'M sobs
like yea the first episode with Ed and Edna in it has Jay avoiding them like the plague but this gets explained very easily when you remember he was bullied for his home life before he became a ninja. It makes a lot more sense why he wouldn't want them around his new friends, assuming they'd react the same way. Also how was he supposed to know literally all the rest of the groups parents were either dead, presumed dead, or had a toxic relationship with their kid lmao
(Cole calling his mom kills me. Cole's mom is dead. I know they probably just didn't think that far ahead when writing the dialogue but it's so funny mans pretended to call his dead mom to get on Jay for not appreciating his parents iconic behavior)
anyways literally every episode Ed and Edna are central to (except like the one in skybound) Jay stops at nothing to protect his parents and it means the absolute world to me he's so much like them!! They raised an inventive little nerd and he will stop at nothing to make sure they're safe and it's. It's SO IMPORTANT TO ME OKAY
ALSO this is an excuse to clip my favorite piece of dialogue possibly in the entire show. Except Netflix won't let me now. So you just get the text dialogue
Jay's just fallen from the sky with a messed up eye and is incredibly distraught that all his friends are captured. And his dad just. The woRLD IS FALLING APART AND HE'S EATIN' SOUP-
Ed i love you
anyways
anways anyways this just turned into me rambling about prime empire and then Ed and Edna and a lot of disjointed other stuff but thank you for this opportunity i was going to also ramble about lloyd but i put this post in a word count and
yea i think that's enough for a tumblr post anyways! If anyone wants any like. More logically thought out and direct thoughts about characters feel free to send me asks this was fun thank u @zaptrap for this opportunity to scream about jay
#help this was. my brain is so not intact today so if this makes absolutely 0 sense i understand#i did end up watching some prime empire stuff during my ramblings and guys. the ending of that season still makes me cry#this is fully prime empire propaganda btw i need to like. talk about the season more because despite what my skybound posting would lead#y'all to believe THIS IS THE ACTUAL SEASON THAT LIVES IN MY HEAD AT ALL TIMES MOST OF MY MUTUALS ARE JUST MORE SKYBOUND BRAINED#AND IT RUBS OFF ON ME EASILY#but no prime empire is the fucking best#if i talk about jay long enough it WILL just turn into prime empire#also after I wrapped up this post i continued thinking more jay thoughts but this post is already long enough#like how jay is actually SO incredibly self-sacrificing and how he cares so much about helping people#also wow i didn't even mention his powers in that whole ramble. rare for me.#one day i wanna do!! a powers masterpost. like how i view all the ninja's elemental powers#but thats another day's project i am. So Eepy#anyways hope y'all appreciated this#also thank u serp for sending this ask which allowed me to Scream into the Void about jay walker#category 11 han moment fr#ninjago#lego ninjago#jay#jay walker#unagami#edna#ed#i have no idea if ANY of this is coherent btw#prime empire#skybound#hunted#quest for the lost powers#ask#spinjitsu screams
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Screaming crying throwing up reading Tom's perspective on Alex.
Like how do you, a fourteen year old child, try to help out your best friend who has clearly been through something traumatic, but you don't know what. How do you deal with your friend disappearing for weeks on end and returning with bags under his eyes and scars all over his body. How do you deal with your friend leaving and coming back a little bit more changed each time, a little bit more scarred each time.
like
"When the two of them had finally met again, Tom had been surprised at how much his friend had changed. He had been hurt. Tom had seen some of the scars. But Alex also seemed to have got a lot older. There was something in his eyes that hadn't been there before, as if he had seen things he would never be able to forget." - Scorpia (page 86)
#reading other people's perspective on alex in general usually makes me wanna cry#because from the perspective of people who don't know him that well like his teachers or Sabina initially#hes a weirdo who keeps disappearing and maybe doing illegal shit#which is funny yet so so sad thing#because i am amused by how everyone thinks alex is some sort of delinquent but also its so heartbreaking because alex wants more than#anything to be a normal teenage boy and he can't have that because of how his reputations been changed!#and then when its the perspective of people like Jack or Ms Jones or Tom#we just see a traumatised kid#like we get to see how much alex has been affected by all the things he's been through#jack's pov at the end of skeleton key had me in tears#god#and ms jones at the end of every single book mentions that alex has clearly changes#AUHFGURHFDSJNG#god wtf i did not mean to get this emotionally invested in a childrens book series#but look at me now#alex rider#alex rider spoilers#scorpia#GOD#i am on exactly page 86 of scorpia rn#im gonna go back to reading now
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A fnc fic where they met as kids, either by Chip obtaining a way to the under sea and meeting Gil some how or Gil running away to an above sea island and meeting Chip, where they know each other for no more than a month, but fundamentally change the course of each other's lives.
Where Chip shows Gil that it's not always black and white, that life is colored in shades of gray, that the Elders approval isn't everything.
Where Gil shows Chip how to allow himself to be, where he doesn't shave to chance his adoptive father's legacy, he can just be himself.
Where they sob in each others arm for hours knowing it'll likely be the last time they meet.
Where Chip, as he grows, learns to dream for himself, be himself, not chasing a shadow of a time long gone.
Where Gil, as he grows, learns to live for himself, be himself, not trying to fill impossible shoes for a Prophecy that could never be for him.
They do meet again, many years later, when each other is barely a wisp of a memory.
Chip in that boat with Jay, sure of himself and his own journey.
Gil floating in the open tide, having left his home to be free.
They don't recognize each other. They remember the person they met in their childhoods. But names and faces were lost to time.
They become crew, they become family.
One night, in an emotional conversation brought on by feelings of longing for a person long gone, they tell each other about the friend they had in their youths.
About the friend that forever changed their lives.
And maybe they realize, maybe they don't.
But regardless, they're together now. And forever.
#jrwi#just roll with it#jrwi riptide#jrwi gillion#gillion tidestrider#jrwi chip#chip james#jay ferin#jrwi jay#(mentioned but not a focus)#fnc#jrwi fnc#jrwi fish and chips#GOOD GRIEF THEY MAKE ME INSANE#bout made myself cry with this one bois#yes i did mean for it to come across as gay :)#chip is such a gunky gooey bastards. makes me wanna take him apart and put him back together over and over again#fnc brainrot#i miss them#my soul longs for that which it cannot have#SOBBIGN RN#apparently having a cry session in the tags about just wanting my silly goofy bois back#the title for the fic would be 'Finding My way back to You“
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i used to freehand comics all the time as a child and since the part i liked was the drawing part i would just draw panel after panel because i didn't want to stop drawing to think about icky icky words, plus the story TOTALLY still made perfect sense! to me! and noone else, but 'whoooo caaaaares omgggg its not like comics and sequantial art are a communicative meeediummmm lmaoooooo'. i spent my entire childhood telling myself stuff like "oh pfft I know this story by heart- ill SIMPLY remember the dialogue and write it later" ...and. I can't help but admire baby maiora's (call that a minora ba tm tsk) fucking audacity? hubris? confident wrongness? kid couldn't even remember to finish the comics in the first place? INCREDIBLE levels of unearned self assurance, wish that were me, genuinely- what an icon!!! anyway i think i have forever cursed myself
#maiora garrulates#the maiora overthinks the process of writing dialogue saga continues!!!!!!!#im so tired. i have been overthinking this shit in circles i have not been making any progress in any which way lmao!#im bitching and moaning for funsies this is not that serious in the Grand Scheme Of Things i just wanna improve at my fav thing#and ❤️ Unfortunately ❤️ my favorite thing in the world involves learning MY MOST HATED *NEMESIS*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! verbal communication. ew#words are fun! i LOVE words! toys!!!!! im using words right now and i didn't combust!!!!! wow look at that!!!!!!!!!!!!!#putting words in SEQUENCE? multiple times?? filtering THOUGHTS into SENTENCES???? sentences that a character would or wouldn't SAY???#AND THEN THERE'S ANOTHER CHARACTER SOMETIMES???? AND THAT BITCH ALSO HAS THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS????? AND THEY ALL HAVE PERSONAL IDIOLECTS#AND TONES THAT S U P P O S E D L Y ARE IMPLICATED BY MANNERISMS AND VERBAL HABITS AND CIRCUMSTANCES (AND THERE'S WRONG ANSWERS! ALSO!!)#AND THEY'RE IN A CONTEXT!! AND THEY'RE INTERACTING WITH EACH OTHER AND INFLUENCING EACH OTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#THE CONVERSATION COULD VARY GIVEN ENERGY LEVELS WHETER OR NOT SOMEONE'S FOOT IS FALLING ASLEEP THE F U C K I N G WEATHER#“oh dialogue is easy just say it out loud to yourself until it 'sounds normal' ^^”#screaming crying throwing up NONE OF THIS IS INTUITIVE TO MEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....!#ok dramatics over its out of my system! for now!!!#this is all easily explained bc i just. draw a lot more than i talk to people. so like. OBVIOUSLY i have more practice drawing#so drawing comes natural! talking does not! subsequently dialogue is Hard! No FUCKING Shit Sherlock!!!!! (affectionate)#so yeah. im using y'all (the tumblr void) as practice! hi!!! words at you!!!!!!!!!!#so yeah thanks for baring with me while passing by my corner of the internet#i do love self indulgence this is fun check out my navel gazing actually no do not look at my belly button#anyway i just think this is mildly interesting. some of my writer buds have the same “not good enough” allergy towards visuals#but they use it to be mean2me >:( same bitch that “omg i cant i suck at drawing i can't do this-” does the “uhm. just write? lol.” 2 meeee#we could have peace and love on planet earth and a common experience and yet you KICK miette for being bad at words!!!1!!! </3 heartbreak!!#what the fuck was i talking about even#oh yeah. perfectionism within creatives i guess. LMAO JK i am talking about NOTHIN!!!!G i am just putting Words Out Here ehehehehehe#its practice >;)c#all this bc ive been doodling comics for myself again and im V!! PROUD OF THE ART!!!! wanna share- but DIALOGUE!*⚡sfx!!*....... so! options#a) leaving it blank. no there are NO microphones in the budget. b) leaving blank *balloons* so that the Rythm is there. implied convo!!!#c) ...doing it badly. (tragic)(heartwrenching)(teeny tiny bruise 2 the ego) *dramatic single tear cleches fists * its the only way.........#...we shall see! literally none of this is all that serious i am procrastinating!! <3 playing with my tuoys!!!!!!!! silly time!!!#/all lh! am reaching 30 tags so that is all for THIS episode of the maiora bitches about dialogue saga thank you for joining me!!okilyBuhBY
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so. oracion
#^ how i look when i listen to oracion#i dont...remember oracion having an emotional impact on kid me?#like. i Literally barely remembered m10#so most of that was New to me#were there any pokemon movies that hit me? i dont really remember#the victini movie i think. i used to be a little obssesed with iy#but i think it was more because it featured victini and i love loved victini very much#sky warrior is good but its not making me cry#alright i think i just need to sit down and rewatch all the pokemon movies#the mewtwo one with the pikaclone slap fight didnt hit me. i do remember ash died and got better bc they all cried tho#i wanna rewatch the lati one#and jewel of life too ofc#i only know this bc i was told this but apparently i was soooo obsessed with jewel of life#which i guess? i remember quite a bit from that movie#there was that spiky eared pichu even#i was obsessed with that lad
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hey guess who just finished EotE and is feeling So Very Normal about it
#i wanna paint this properly at some point but i needed to get this out of my system#my art#id in alt#outer wilds#eote#outer wilds spoilers#(idk if this says anything without context lol but i'll probably ramble in the tags so imma give it a spoiler tag anyway)#i will admit i only watched a walkthrough instead of playing bc i am a wuss :')#would def recommend playing over watching any part of ow but still. hhhhhhhh#the thematic contrast & parallels of the strangers is so gooood#also the atmosphere (it is great in the entirely of ow but i love how eote keeps it up while making it distinct from the main game?)#also also solanums and the prisoners theme together is the best thing. btw. so pretty but it makes me cry#but ye. i love how it starts with one eye and then every species that gets involved has progressively more#which idk if there is supposed to be any meaning to that lol but it sure is cool for Imagery TM
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i am still not over the fact arlecchino is referred to as "father" by the house of the hearth kids btw. the gender of it all
#i cant articulate this ugh#its just. the idea that she plays not the role of mother#where nurture and compassion would typically be expected of her#but the role of father. where a more stern and i guess distant sort of love might be typically expected. Yeah#i also dont hate the fact she doesnt seem to be abusive to the kids. i know i said i wanted her to be irredeemably evil but i really dig th#s#i actually really like the direction they seem to be taking? where its like.#shes still The Fatui. shes still using orphaned kids for military missions#but she doesnt go out of her way to harm the children. id say she sort of goes out of her way to *not* do so#AGH IT MAKES ME INSANE!!!!#the fontaine siblings' voicelines about her made me utterly insane. particularly freminet's#leaks skip if u dont wanna know but when he says she doesnt like crying so he avoids shedding tears in front of her at all costs (augh)#but still will say that things got better after the house director changed and she took charge#and that she literally told him that he has to value his own life instead of prioritizing self-sacrifice for loved ones' sakes. or somethin#which i take to be good advice for freminet in particular who has some concerning suicidal tendencies going on in there#anyway yeah arlecchino i am obsessed with you#my posts
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today is just one of those days where i wanna scream and cry because everything just seems to be piling up.
#its em again ₊˚ෆ#wow did i bake for you all today and then at 3 fucking pm i wanna make lunch for myself but nooo i made a mess#WHICH I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF CLEANING UP BEFORE YOU DECIDED TO BARGE IN#ugh and then you decide that apparently i should know what ingredients we need for dinner even though i dont know even how to make it#and on top of all that shit#you give me a decision abt staying with a girl i dont really like for a week#because she's coming up to visit and our parents are sorta friends (they're not even that good of friends??)#and i cant actually cry because#“emma why are you crying?”#and i do not have the energy to try and explain that i just#fuck
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