#which is in itself an opinion i know
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Maybe someone already said this in the reblogs, but I also believe this "self-insert" mentality in first person is another reason why so many FMCs get hated for simply... being a character and doing things, especially when they're not 100% good or have a personality (the biggest sin of all—I say this with sarcasm) or aren't what the reader deems as "correct" in their eyes.
So, when an author writes a morally grey woman, and the reader uses their personal compass to guide themselves through the story, and suddenly this character that they're projecting onto does a bad thing they wouldn't do, they're like "nope, this is not me therefore this is a BAD book and whoever likes it is a bad person."
Not only is that a terrible take to have on a piece of fiction, but it also shows a lack of compassion and media literacy on the reader's part.
I say compassion because, in my opinion, part of engaging with any sort of art is to ask questions while trying to find the answers within ourselves. Why did this character do this thing? What led them here? Was there another option for them? Can I empathise with them for making this choice or not?
Also, art doesn't have to be questioned to be understood, and not every book is made to be analysed, which is more than fine (all books are valid and I will not tolerate people criticising romance as a genre because some of you think it's not "intellectual" enough. This is not about you, either).
And I say media literacy because characters are not—and I can't stress this enough—people!! So using your moral compass to judge a character will not work because, once again, they're characters. They'll always be constricted by the rules of plot and not the rules of reality/real world (even when these characters live in our world).
And like, there's nothing wrong with wanting to find characters that you can relate to, especially when they're the main characters! That's why representation is so important—sometimes we need to see some sort of "us" in the media/art we engage with so we can find value and understanding in who we are as individuals. But you're not the main character of the books you're reading.
And if you want to be the main character of a book, maybe write an autobiography, I don't know.
wait do people read first person stories and think they're the ones in the story???
Saw people talking about not liking first person, which is fair, but their reasoning was like "I would not do that" and I don't understand that mindset.
First person stories are still about a character. A character making their own decisions. First person isn't about you???? At least I thought it wasn't. What am I missing? I've always seen first person as just a more in-depth look into a character's mind and stricter POV. Not as a reader stand-in.
#on writing#writing discourse#i hope it's okay i added this!!#also when i say 'you' i'm not referring to op#and this is not all of my thoughts but i'm not going to say much else here#and maybe 'compassion' isn't the word i was looking for but idk what other word to use tbh#so excuse me#i usually don't post my opinion on things because i don't like to have opinions on the internet#which is in itself an opinion i know#but still#i don't like being perceived most of the time#which is why i keep my thoughts to myself#but i'm sharing these
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Who Is Allison Moore?: A Disney's Wish Mystery
OK, this is a little off the rails and random but this has been driving me crazy since I looked into it last night.
So, Disney's 100th Anniversary movie Wish is coming out soon and people have had a lot of hot takes about it so I wanted to do some digging. As part of that, I looked at the writers and two people have a "Screenplay by" credit: Jennifer Lee and Allison Moore.
Jennifer Lee, of course, wrote Frozen--their biggest princess hit in the modern era so that makes total sense to me. If you're coming out with a new princess movie for the big centennial of course you'd tap her. But I'd never heard of Allison, and when you look at her name on Wikipedia:
No blue link. So I headed to IMDB to check out her credits, figuring maybe she was some hot new talent recently promoted from within who did storyboards on some recent projects like Moana or something. But when I went to her IMDB page, this is what I found (after a brief mix-up with a Dexter's Lab actress):
Her Producer credits come up first and...huh. That's a lot of adult live action TV projects. Well, maybe her Writing credits are where this starts to make sense:
What? That can't be right, can it? The only vaguely Disney-esque thing on that credit list is Beauty and the Beast and, to be clear, that is a CW reboot of a 1987 procedural with the logline, "A beautiful detective falls in love with an ex-soldier who goes into hiding from the secret government organization that turned him into a mechanically charged beast." And she wrote two episodes on it.
And look at Disney's official page about Wish!
Everyone else on this page has credits that make sense--Frozen, Frozen 2, Raya, Encanto. And the two credits they list for Allison?
Night Sky and Manhunt.
Night Sky, an Amazon Prime show that she wrote one episode for and was cancelled after one season. And Manhunt--and show about hunting the UNABOMBER--that ran for two seasons and that she wrote two episodes for. Those are her two credits that they put up there next to Frozen and Encanto.
I have been scouring the internet trying to figure out who this woman is and how she got this job and I have come up *empty*. This is the big 100th anniversary movie! Why would they have one of the two screenplay writers be someone who seemingly has never done something like this before??? Like, I understand that not having done something before doesn't mean you can't do a good job, but it usually means you don't get the keys to the biggest most anticipated projects in the company's history!
They presumably could have gotten anyone they wanted for this and they picked this person and I have zero clue why and it's driving me crazy. If anyone has ANY information that could illuminate this at ALL--an interview, a social media post, gossip from your cousin who's a gofer at Disney--please let me know because I feel like I'm going full Pepe Silvia over this.
12/26 Edit: A SMALL UPDATE IS HERE!
#disney's wish#wish 2023#disney#personal#this is separate from my opinions on the movie itself#which I def do have oh boy#but I also just want to know how this happened#how did she get this job?????#she doesn't write for kids or for animation or really for fantasy very much#so why did they hire her???#this doesn't seem like her wheelhouse at all!
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i feel like im not making any sense but does anyone else feel like there are stories that let u run with them and ones that spell everything out for you
#im reading that post that says artists are directors of audience reaction and not its dictator:#'you cannot guarantee that everyone viewing your work will react as you are trying t make them react. a good artist knows that this is what#allows work to breath. by definition you cannot have art where the viewer brings nothing to the table ... this is why you have to let go of#the urge to plainly state in text exactly how you think the work should be interpreted ... its better to be misinterpreted sometimes than#to talk down to your audience. you wont even gain any control that way; people will still develop their opinions no matter what you do#im thinking abt this again cuz i was thinking maybe the thing that lets adventure time work so well the way it does is cuz it doesnt#take itself too seriously that it gives the audience enough room to fuck with subtext and then fuck with them back yknow. i think it was#mentioned somewhere that they werent even planning to run with the postapocalyptic elements that are hinted in the show but changed their#mind after the one off with the frozen businessmen and dominoed into marcy and simons backstory. on the other side there are stories that#explain too much to let the story speak for itself and i think it ends up having to do more with the crew trying to lead ppl in a certain#direction than expand on what they have and i see a lot of this with miraculous. like when interviews and tweets are used as word of god in#arguments and it becomes a little stifling to play around with it knowing the creator can just interject. u can say its the crews effort to#engage with its audience but it feels more like micromanaging. and none of this is to say there ISNT room for stories that spell things out#theyre just suited for different things. if sesame street tried abstract approaches to themes and nuance itd be counterproductive#a lot of things fly over my head so i need help picking things apart to get it- but it doesnt have to be from the story itself. ive picked#picked up or built on my own interpretations listening to other ppl share their thoughts which creates conversation around the same thing#sometimes stories will spell things out for you without being so obvious abt it that it feels like its woven into the text. my fav example#for this might be ATLA using younger characters as its main cast but instead of feeling like its dumbed down for kids to understand why war#is bad its framed from a childs point of view so younger audiences can pick up on it by relating to the characters. maybe an 8 year old#wont get how geopolitics works but at least they get 'hey the world is a little more complicated than everyone vs. fire nation'. same for#steven universe bc its like theyre trying to describe and put feelings into words that kids might not have so they have smth to start with#especially with the metaphors around relationships bc even if it looks unfamiliar as a kid now maybe the hope is for it to be smth you can#look back to. thats why it feels like these shows grew up with me.. instead of saving difficult topics for 'when im ready for it'#as if its preparing me for high school it gave me smth to turn in my hands and revisit again and again as i grow. stories that never#treated u as dumb all along. just someone who could learn and come back to it as many times as u need to. i loved SU for the longest time#but i felt guilty for enjoying it hearing the way ppl bash it. bc i was a kid and thought other ppl understood it better than me and made#feel bad for leaning into the message of paying forward kindness and not questioning why steven didnt punish the diamonds or hold them#accountable. but im rewatching it now and going oh. i still love this show and what it was trying to teach me#yapping#diary
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I think I’m too influenced by other people’s opinions
I mean yeah, I know that, but I mean this specifically in the case of my current fixation, aka Transformers, and that I really don’t know what to think on it anymore
Not about whether it’s good or bad in general, but more how should the story and characters be interpreted, and what were poor decisions or not
Like for example, Megatron. I was thinking about making this its own post today, but it fits here. I feel like having my first two pieces of media I consume in this current dive into Transformers being Transformers One (where we see the tragic fall of D-16 and I’m really invested in him and Orion’s bond and just want to see them get back together, and also this version of him has done relatively very little so it’s a lot easier to redeem him) and then after that Transformers Earthspark (where we start out the series with redeemed Megatron and we almost always see him in a positive light, plus it’s the only non doomed megop) is the main reason why I’m so invested in Megatron as a character and want him to have redemption stories. Like I feel like if I started with another show, I might not feel this way. I might still appreciate him as a villain, I like him in Animated, but he would not be my (I think) assigned mess of a character I obsess over and want good things to happen to
Because it’s like, I want him to have a redemption story, I want to see him turn to the good side (and probably kiss Optimus idk. I would be open to other options if there’s others). But a part of me also recognizes that Megatron is definitely not the most deserving Decepticon of that title; Starscream at least deserves it more than him. And to top it off there’s the problem of him committing so many war crimes and atrocities that gets really hard to justify him getting any sort of happy ending that redemptions usually come with. TFOne Megs is like the one with the least amount of that problem, but it’s probably not going to become common
And also when I say this, I don’t mean I want it for every version of Megatron. I’m saying that when I try to make up stories or my own version of a continuity, this is what I want to do
Like it’s to the point where I’m trying to invent in my mind characters to be more evil than Megatron or be above him so that he can get that redemption, until I realize that what I’m doing would better fit another character. Megatron is supposed to that big bad evil, it’s literally what he’s here for
So I think that wanting this is a bad thing and I just shouldn’t do it. But then I also see other people who think the story of Megatron having a redemption is an interesting idea, meaning that it is something that has merit. So I don’t know now whether I should. Can you give Megatron a believable redemption story or not? And does it depend on whether you need to tweak him to polish out some of his big flaws?
Though it’s gotten to the point where upon reflection, I think my issue isn’t necessarily wanting it, it’s the way I want it as opposed to how it should be done. I think I’m gonna need to find more interpretations of redemption Megatron to really see how it should be done, because I know what I want probably isn’t the best for the story. As far as official media goes, I assume my best bet is IDW, since that’s the one that actually introduced the concept and showed the redemption. But even then, I wouldn’t know what’s considered a good version of this idea and what isn’t until someone tells me
Crap I spent a bit too long on this topic. I actually had a second one to mention. Well, since we’re here anyways, might as well
The other big point of contention for me is the matter of the origins of the Deception cause
Because personally, I like the idea of it starting out as a noble cause, and/or at least the idea of the Decepticons not being pure evil and more a group of Transformers with differing opinions and morals from the Autobots
But then you come to the issue that: they’re literally called Decepticons and they’re supposed to be the bad guys, no matter what sympathetic backstory you may give them. They only aren’t the bad guys when something else more evil shows up, and that’s usually only temporary
Like, to borrow words I heard elsewhere, how do you believe in your cause with a name like that? It’s so evil sounding, and how do you justify giving them a name like that? And for the second point, what does it say when these guys are ultimately supposed to be the villains?
And like I’ve seen people criticize the more modern backstories given to the Decepticons and by proxy Megatron, in part because they’re the villains. From what I understand, in Aligned, the Decepticon cause started from a genuine want by the lower class citizens for equal rights and a distaste for their genuinely absolutely corrupt government who didn’t care about them. It is essentially a worker’s revolution, and them being violent doesn’t necessarily make them evil, as we have historical proof that taking violent action has ultimately worked to change things for the better in our society (though it also isn’t always the solution, just that it has worked before). So what does it say when these people, at least later, become the objective villains of the story? And what does it say when the Autobots, the good guys of the story, weren’t largely made up of this group of people fighting for equal rights? Yes, Optimus agreed with their initial stance and worked with them because he genuinely believed in their cause, but he wasn’t a low class bot, Megatron was
Like I understand that criticism when it’s spelled out like that. And not to mention, it is a bit ridiculous trying to justify a name like Decepticons, just when you look at it on paper
If they had a more neutral sounding name, like the Autobots, we wouldn’t be in this situation. But it was the 80s and they needed an obvious bad guy name and we’re never going to get rid of it, so
But also I really think you’re losing something by just having the Decepticons be evil and nothing more, and their cause being nothing more than conquest and other evil things. But then where do you draw the line so you don’t go to the point where you’re questioning why they’re the bad guys? I just don’t know
I’m realizing now that these issues I’m bringing up are just things that probably require nuance if you want to execute them well. Maybe that’s the reason they confuse me; I have no moderation and can only go one extreme or the other, unless someone tells me what the correct balance is
But my point was, I have thoughts on how I want Transformers things to be done, but I don’t know what the correct way to do them actually is, probably because I listen to too many people with a bunch of different view points because I just want to see all sides of an argument
And now it’s left me unable to truly know what I think, because I just don’t know who’s right
I feel like maybe I just need to take a step back and just watch the shows without sticking too deep into the fandom to figure out my own personal opinions and what I’d want to do. But at the same time, I’m ass at binging these shows right now and I can’t not interact with the fandom, I need the content
#I don’t know I’m not sure I had an actual overall point to this#I think I was just complaining about my indecisiveness and all the opinions#though I suppose I did have some points sprinkled in#granted the Megatron section was more about how my brain has warped itself into wanting something I’m not sure I should#or more accurately that the character deserves and also wondering if this should be for another character#while the Decepticon section was more an actual point about the whole issue of sympathetic Decepticons#oh shit right my point I meant to add in: Shattered Glass#might as well add it in here so my point was that if you want good Decepticons we already have SG#at what point are we just turning into Shattered Glass?#and don’t get me wrong I’d love to see Shattered Glass#but it’s fundamentally an AU which makes it less interesting/impactful when it stands alone#but anyways yeah#indecision and gullibility is killing me with Transformers and what I want out of it#I don’t know what’s best and I trust every opinion until told otherwise#which means trouble#transformers#megatron#decepticons#long post#rambles
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wait realistically how successful do yall think the sb-derap-pangi plan will work
#lifesteal spoilers#mine.txt#like. i havent really had any opinions on it#mostly cause i think its kinda stupid lol#like theyre trying to both 1. get the mace from clown and 2. not make even a single player realize the mace is gone#like sb and pangi couldnt even commit to destroying all the trial chambers which while tedious is objectively the easiest part of the plan#how the hell are they gonna commit to all the other shit lmao???#like respect to derap for wanting to go all the way#but if the rest of the team couldnt even commit to that how are they gonna commit to the rest of it#you cant execute a plan like this without putting your whole cock and pussy in it bruh 😭#trying to not make the other players realize the mace is gone by crashing the server is particularly ????#like how the hell are they gonna time that#i mean. i Guess they technically dont need to be precise but like they gotta#1. let the server know they have the mace 2. avoid dying before they crash the server and 3. not make anyone realize the mace is gone#although that 3rd point can easily be ruined by someone looking at the crafting recipe#although ig at that point it wouldnt matter assuming derap doesnt give up halfway through destroying the chambers either#wait so whats the point of crashing the server then cant they just throw it in the void??#and if they really dont want ppl to know they can just do it while nobody else is online#like theres a perfectly functional void hole at spawn and the hours theyre on lends itself well to having an empty server#i need to stop thinking about this plan bruh im gonna get a headache
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so i finally read through that linked universe comic just to see what all the fuss was about and while i think the sheer attention to detail when it comes to game mechanics and weaponry is fucking awesome (the FOUR SWORD!!! the one shot of the pristine master sword in twilight princess juxtaposed with the overgrown red master sword in a link to the past! the magical sword finally getting some attention in fanworks!!!) i do have. some questions about four (because of course that's the guy i'm focused on. you see my blog's url). because. like. he's directly modeled after the hero of men in particular but he's also the hero of the minish but he's ALSO the hero of the four sword and then i'm assuming that sort of just lumps both the actual hero of the four sword (post-minish pre-four swords game guy) and the playable hero in four swords together. and THEN given that when he splits the creator said she based it off the manga and the fact that four knows about ganon he is ALSO apparently the hero of light. and like. sure. given the weirdness of the canon timeline and ignoring the differences in looks/lore given in the game manuals you COULD. if you wanted. just fudge the playable heroes from the minish cap/four swords/four swords adventures together and say that they all could be the same guy. but. i mean. under no circumstances would that include the hero of men, wielder of the picori blade. i feel like this is coming off as criticizing or something and i don't mean for it to at all but why in THE hell is he based directly off of the hero of men. when he's supposed to be the hero of the four sword
#IT'S NOT SERIOUS AT ALL IT'S JUST BEWILDERING#THAT GUY (HERO OF MEN) IS DEAD AND GONE HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE F. SWORD IS.......#whatever i just think it's hilarious lmao. anyway. my opinion of the comic itself is that it's neat i guess. it has a LOT of attention#to detail which i appreciate but unfortunately my brain's knowledge of actual lore is keeping me from getting invested in it LMAOOOO#txt
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twitter has poisoned this fandom i fear ... we used to be a community..
#rambling in the tags#i know many people here are twitter refugees#many of whom never experienced spnblr in its true prime#save us 2014 tumblr save us#there is so much spn fandom infighting now i cant#ppl used to be annoying and hateful way back when too but omg.... we used to be a community#like now its samgirls dont like deangirls (which??? are we not on the same side here???)#its deans a horrible evil person this well sams a toxic person that and destihellers and wincesties cant just get along#or just enjoy each others content#like i HATE THAT !! i hate the dean hate from samgirls i always despised the sam hate back in the day from mainly destiel shippers#(which ive seen WAY LESS sam hate since ive come back recently its mostly DEAN hate whether its wincest or destiel shippers)#and people werent calling each other disgusting freaks for shipping one thing or another#destihelllers have always been annoygin that much i will say but seriouslu#we used to be a FAMILY#now its whos character/ship the most valid/morally “correct” wars#i love that a lot of thoughts and opinions and ships and things have matured so much since 2014#truly its beautiful how much more detailed and nuanced the thoughts and ideas and opinions on the show are now that weve had like 10 years#to think and stew over this stuff#but theres just so much like. fighting and arguing#the spn empire has fallen in on itself#shouldnt be surprising#which im not really surprised just sad and idealistic#nostalgic for the days when we all loved all the characters and i didnt have to see “takes”#thanks a lot twitter.com#spn#ham.txt
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man, you know something is deeply wrong with Xitter Twitter when the Eurovision subreddit has saner opinions than Twitter itself :| I know it will push blue checks/certain ideologies over others, but holy shit.
(For the record: I did not watch Eurovision according to the boycott, but I've been checking out what social media had to say about what went down. It's all been a massive mess- And distracting from what is actually relevant, but it was a way to gauge public opinion.)
Anyhow, please donate if you can to any of these charities. I'm sorry for not having spoken up enough about this.
#eurovision#adding in tags bc it's not relevant to the post itself but it's been... hard. it's been really hard#it's been hard to not doomscroll for literal months now about the state of the world#or even find out that people you trust are either deeply misinformed or straight out siding with... That.#i have a lot of opinions on the topic and maybe i could do a post on it if people were interested#some of y'all know i'm romani on mother's side and i do have very strong opinions on g/nocide#which is a wild sentence to say. everyone should have strong opinions on it. mostly being horrified. fucking hell
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Behold, my latest and most enamouring new obsession:
Malina, Lady of the Chief of the Northern Water Tribe. As if Red Lotus child OCs weren’t niche enough
#my art#artists on tumblr#the legend of korra#lok malina#still feel like that’s too vague of a tag but I can’t come up with anything better for now#and yeah. she has completely stolen by heart and I don’t know how to feel about that#don’t think I ever was this attracted to my own art before#to be fair the design isn’t mine. it’s very heavily based on something nina drew back in 2021#because I did not have the energy or creativity to come up with my own thing#but the art is all mine and I genuinely adore it. super proud of myself which is a rare occurrence#anyways. kat and I spent three days digging this niche lower and lower and now have a he#*hell of a lot of lore about this basically nonexistent character#for lore about a lady from the North Pole a lot of it is rather hot… to the point my cheeks are burning non stop#I would say I’d let her do anything she wants to me but in my very specific aroace-adjacent case it’s more like#I’d let her tell me to do anything she wants to her#if that makes any sense and I have not completely lost my goddamn mind yet#okay. enough yapping. back to the art itself#lazy background because I suck at those and am not currently attempting to learn them. I’ll probably do that over the summer#about time anyway. my characters have been placed against an off-white background for far. far too long#this is the first piece in just over a year that isn’t tagged with sotrl. which is kinda weird tbh#I’ve been drawing my OCs almost exclusively for nearly 5 years so it is genuinely surprise I’m branching out#*surprising#less branching out and more diving from one hole into another but y’know#anyway. in my personal and very correct opinion she turned out absolutely gorgeous#her servants are way too lucky and unalaq is way too much of an idiot. no offence to vaatu but he could never beat out this#and I also have Kat’s personal and very correct opinion to back up my own. two against the void. once again we’re winning#I wanna draw her a lot more bc she has completely possessed my brain. I just wish character interactions were easier to draw 😭#I’ll figure it out. just need to fight my visualisation issues for a proper idea. brb#okay I’m almost at the tag limit so. in summary:#she 🩵🩵🩵🩵🩵
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long tag ramble below u have been warned
#ok i feel like i should say Something before i start being active again#but i dont want it to be a Statement which is why i’m putting it in the tags#(also bc i procrastinated doing this for weeks so i know this is a very stale topic by now#but i also haven’t been on tumblr literally at all so this is 100% my organic authentic opinion lmao)#so read if you gaf and ignore if you don’t#anyway: george def could’ve done more to ensure she was comfortable#and as someone who has also gotten in over my head with older men and regretted it#her hurt is valid and i’m deeply sorry she feels the way she does about that night#but with that said i see no reason to believe george Should have known how she really felt#or that he deliberately took advantage of either her youth/inexperience or her discomfort#and that’s the most important thing for me— he fucked up and misread a situation but that doesn’t make him an evil person#and i hope they can both move on and grow and heal#as for my future in the fandom: i honestly dunno how active i’ll be going forward#i was already becoming pretty disconnected so this might’ve just sped up the process? i’m tired of being put through the wringer#but i also don’t really have a fandom to replace this so i might just continue casually participating in the way i have been#either way rest assured i will never become a rabid anti. that shits embarrassing#i got HORRIBLE drolo rsd the other day when tommy’s mom needed clout and vagued him so like if nothing else. droloisms are forever#also as a last thing— this feels kinda silly and self centered to say but i will anyway#sorry for not opening up my blog as a forum for discussion again the way i did with the drituation#i know i helped a lot of people sort out their feelings and that was (and is) really really important to me#but it also tanked my mental health (mostly as a result of the fallout and not the act itself but still)#plus my life irl was pretty stressful at the time when everything was first going down#so i just didn’t feel up to putting myself through that again#but i’m sorry if anyone wanted to discuss w me but wasn’t able to#anyway. i think that’s all i have to say!#i don’t want to turn this into a capital D discussion but as always my askbox and dms are open#love you all tons! i hope you’re having a good day 🫂🫶#bella talks
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🎤 🎤 🎤
a song that i associate with my muse meme!
AHH, hey, ramone!! thank you for sending in this prompt :D since you sent in three of the mic's, i shall now be treating you to three songs that make me think of blamore when i hear them / that i associate with it. an explanation of why i chose them will be in the tags <3
hozier - who we are.
youtube
icehouse - crazy.
youtube
depeche mode - personal jesus.
youtube
#IT WAS PROBABLY NOTHING BUT IT FELT LIKE THE WORLD: musings.#asks - answered.#ooc post.#okay but ESPECIALLY heavy on the last one because it literally all about the idea of someone that people can turn to in hard times-#like a god or a prophet who will listen to your plights and help you + who you should believe in. and i say this because one major theme-#to blamore's character is the concept of being a false prophet and someone who essentially unfortunately takes advantage of people's-#longing for things to get better in gotham. bc i feel like a lot of people there have either been failed by the system by other's or-#possibly both and this is so that blamore can get people to voluntarily want to consume the 'seeds' it distributes in order to uhh...#well purge gotham of its undesirables basically as terrible as that sounds. but yeah that depeche mode song? it's such a good one for-#him and definitely has helped me before to write things related to him since blamore does sometimes believe in its own hubris.#but as for the second one by icehouse that one i associate with it because although it doesn't exactly consider itself to fully identify-#with the label of being a 'man' i feel as if blamore will still talk about itself that way sometimes. its relationship with its gender-#is honestly a little bit complicated NGL because him using it/its pronouns as well is something blamore adopted recently even-#though he'd always sort of felt like disconnected and/or like it didn't really align with how he saw himself completely. BUT yeahhh#i honestly could start a whole discussion about that but i shall do that another time perhaps ahah. anyhow though besides that-#elephant in the room ever since it has transformed into this half-human half-plant monster being... although it does love any partners-#it has very much (trust me) i feel like it does wonder why they chose to be with him more often than he'd like to admit.#so that's where the whole 'crazy' part comes in and as for the hozier song that song is about how you kind of have to carve through-#this 'darkness' to rediscover ourselves and who we want to be as a result of going through a rough time or just something tough in-#general and that is SO freaking fitting in my opinion for blamore because it definitely had to completely reframe the way it thought-#about itself when it transformed. and he also had to figure out what he believed in / what his values were now which can be suchhh-#a messy process TBH but this isn't the first time that blamore's had to rediscover itself as life is honestly kind of this ongoing-#process of losing yourself and trying to find yourself again you know? but yeah. i hope you enjoyed my explanation here tehe <3#and also that you enjoy the tunes!!
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I know that Doctor Who eras are universally considered camp and that a seasoned classic!who fan presumably will laugh at the idea that the show is good "again" when its peaks and valleys constantly come around and are reassessed as overrated or as secret gems, and so yes the idea of Doctor Who being good "again" is kind of ridiculous in the grand scale of things, since RTD is but a drop in a very very big pond (albeit a very important drop considering his was the reboot), but coming in to Capaldi again I've got to say. that M*ffat era is bad, and even Capaldi and Gomez can't make it that much better, although at least they make it bearable and have individual great scenes. but yes this is improving upon quite a few years of bad.
#it's bad in some ways that could be reassessed sure. it's got some single good episodes yes.#but it's also bad in a way that's more misogyny in the text itself than I've seen in any other era including my classic watch#(which i know there's the whole carrot juice thing later on but it's not a whole era under one writer with several companions+doctors)#it's bad in a way that recontextualises the FIRST doctor as more sexist than that era of writing ever was#it's also bad in a way that never gives a satisfying conclusion to any of its major threads#might delete later#(no opinions on chibnall havent got there yet for my proper watch)
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by the way, i finished Nadia's route for the first time and I can really confidently say that out of all the routes i've done thus far - Lucio's and Julian's finished, Asra's and Muriel's half done -, this one was the most well put together for me - which is funny, considering Nadia herself is ALSO the most well put together character in the game :')
#the arcana#was gonna type out Opinions but can't be bothered rn#i highly enjoyed the pacing and the execution of this story#in Julian's route it had like. a bombastic and lovely beginning. but then it felt like it had lost steam halfway through#at which point it felt like it was all over the place#Lucio's route had never lost steam even for a second. but the pacing itself was a lil wack#and i know this is because he's a main antagonist in most other routes#and certain things had to be resolved asap to progress with him#but certain plot points just seemed to pop out of nowhere at random times#which didn't hinder my enjoyment but it sure did shake me out of the Zone from time to time#i got none of these complaints about Nadia's route#truly excellent all the way through
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idk i feel like so much discourse could be easily minimized if people learned to say "i think" instead of "it is"
#like “i think this is a bad game” is way less abrasive/aggressive than “this is a bad game”#do u know where im going w this like#it's literally 2 extra words and it could avoid like 99% of confrontation#ofc there would still be people who are like “omg how can u hate smth i like ur trash” but idk i feel like so much of this discourse u see#on twt especially#is like ? just people being deliberately aggressive abt stuff they dont like to antagonise others and then going “its just my opinion”#and it's hard to read tone online so it's often hard for me (and im sure for others ?? idk actually) to read whether or not sm1 is being#like. just sharing what they think vs them trying to bait out people who will defend smth they like#idk ive been trying to find ffxiv people to follow bc getting back into the game and finally being confident in my art to draw for it also#has me looking for ppl to follow but i wanna avoid the big livetweet first time experiencers and unfortunately that leaves#a lot of people who are afraid of dawntrail/unhappy with the current patch quests#of which i am neither and i also dont want to log on to the internet every day just to see ppl shitting on things u know ?#and i have seen a LOT of like#'x sucked' and 'fandom lacks critical reading skills' and whatnot#but then u see what theyre talking abt and all theyre doing is shitting on the game itself or going 'x expansion was mid'#like . if u stopped phrasing ur opinions as objective fact i feel like maybe ud avoid half those arguments id k???#just words#SORRY im talkative today the truth is i worked on a drawing veyr hard and i do not have the strength to colour it but it will not look good#without colour and i feel like i cant move on without it so i went and replayed shadowbringers instead and cried a lot#and now i have lots of icarus feelings again#WOW loiok at me writing an essay out here i overshare so much im sorry
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#I might delete this later but I'm feeling a bit disheartened and want to just put this out there into the world but not super publicly#But like#The worst part of being overweight in my opinion is that it's so so hard to feel cute or pretty or even decent looking#I'm going to Japan with my older brother next week and I've been curating a cutesy Lolita-esque style outfit for the trip and I finally#got the last of the pieces so I tried it all on. And it's just... no matter how hard I try I can't really see myself as cute in it#I don't know maybe pink isn't my color and this just isn't my style. But.#I tried really hard to make an outfit I'd feel cute in and it's devastating to not really see myself as cute#And it's not really that I think I look bad per se it's just...#I don't know#Not what I wanted it to be I guess#And I know that if I posted pictures people would say ''wow you look great!!!'' because people always say that kind of thing#But I'd always think they were lying or were playing it up#Even if they really weren't#I just wanted to feel cutesy and everything and it hurts somewhere deep inside to not feel that way#I'll still wear the outfit in Japan since I spent enough time and money on this outfit but it really dampens my enthusiasm#And this wasn't the first time I've tried on the dress obviously. I've been trying it on periodically all along#But I kept hoping that once it was done and I had the makeup all on maybe I'd finally be able to see myself as cute#But no#I still don't. Not really.#It doesn't help that the dress itself doesn't even fit properly#I got it on sale which is what sparked this whole idea in the first place and it was always a size too small#It never zipped properly but I was able to work around that with an outer corset that held it closed#And a lace shrug that helped hide the weird bunching in the back#I can sometimes get the dress zipped now since I've lost a little weight#But it's a struggle and I can only do it about half the time and it feels like I'm going to break the zipper each time#I'd think to buy a new dress but a) that would cost even more money and I've already spent way more than I had wanted in my endeavor#to feel cute in this dress. And b) all of the accessories are tailored to this dress specifically#It would be hard to find a good replacement and there is no guarantee that would even help#So I just... I don't know#It's just hard.
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knees weak, arms are heavy
#listen it's too late for me to be very articulate about it (and i'm only on s3 now; the rest of the show is kind of hazily blending) but#one of the things i find most interesting about the red john plot...or jane's pursuit of red john maybe#is how ...individualized? it is#obviously the characters have different opinions on it - is his mission right; is it justified; would it help him; would it condemn him#and you as a viewer can side with one opinion more than others (and the opinions change as the show goes on -it's dynamic#which is another interesting but separate train of thought)#but imo/iirc the show itself - the narrative i guess - never makes any outright statement/judgement/comes to any definitive conclusion#on the matter#idk it's just even this - obviously everything's part of the larger narrative but at the same time#his asking does illustrate at least some level of doubt that he didn't seem to have in the last two seasons#is it because of lisbon; and the team; because of kristina; because of the strain it's putting on himself#(probably not the last one; he is demonstrably cavalier when it comes to his own wellbeing)#and he just happens to have the perfect man to express those doubts to right in front of him#(and that man just happens to be noah bennet alskdfja)#had winter said no what would his reaction have been? would his doubts have gotten worse - led to him taking a step towards giving it up?#would he have doubled down? we have no way of knowing because for this man; for this character it was worth it#and that helps shore up jane's belief that it would still be worth it to him too#idk i'm not making sense but it just feels like there's a level of grey area/audience interpretation to this story#rather than a hard line being drawn (by the story itself) on whether the actions taken in it are good or bad and i appreciate that#character-focused vs a morality tale maybe but that's more of an extreme phrasing#anyway ignore me i'm -#tm
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