#which is important to know.) and then when people do vent art or different kinds of poetry and whatnot

[astrxealis]

art is so beautiful... every artist has their own style. and their soul is there in their work.

[blueblossomrose]

Pleaseeeee I wanna see more on leona from the parent thing 🥺

Course! Here we go!

This post is part of the Twisted Parents Series.

Content: Post-canon, Leona being a tired dad, fem!afab!mc, fluffy.

Art is not mine.

Comments and reblogs are very welcome ♡

Being a father was never something that really crossed his mind. Dealing with Cheka, and his own childhood problems, made him skeptical about the idea.

MC kind of knew about it, but she was ready to tell him anyway.

Leona was surprised and at the same time not. He wouldn't verbalize about it, but after the wedding, his mind turned to children for the first time.

He wouldn't say it was a desire to have children, but more like a concept, imagination.

Well, now he didn't have to imagine anymore.

In the first few months, he's sounds neutral. He doesn't hate it, but he has confused mixed feelings about it.

He doesn't feel the huge appeal, and deep down that makes him angry and sad.

Because he knows he's probably not making you feel safe, because he knows he is behaving exactly like his own parents, ignorants of love.

He refuses to ask Farena anything at first, but it gets to a point where he's so upset that he ends up venting to him.

Farena was straightforward in pointing out that Leona doesn't need to force himself to be something he's not. That he doesn't need to doubt his own emotions because of other people's emotions.

And after this conversation, he goes to talk to MC. She, despite being slightly confused too, didn't crucify him for it. Leona continued to protect her with all his might throughout her pregnancy.

When MC's belly grows and he feels the first kick, his mental confusion worsened, conflicting feelings hitting each other, and even though he still seemed indifferent... there was something between and MC notice.

When he held the babies in his arms for the first time, however... his gaze, which had been different, changed completely.

He loved those children. There was no way he could hate them.

He was: "I'm not going to let anything bad happen to them."

And MC was: "I know 😊"

He is a tired father, as expected of him. Yet, he's doing well there.

One of the common scenes is him lying on your lap while you fold clothes or do some other activity, and your children on top of him, pulling his ears and tail while he sleeps.

When they are babies, Leona is ok to stay up with them while MC sleeps. He understands how tiring it is. Plus, he likes to feel important when he sees that the little ones fall asleep more easily when they are in his arms.

Many times you wake up with the babies on top of you because Leona put them in bed to sleep with you two.

As the babies grow, you notice more clearly how docile Leona is with his daughter.

As if anything Zuri asked for, Leona would give it to her.

He would play with her dolls wearing a pink dress if she asked.

Which honestly wouldn't be impossible for her to ask for. Zuri is very demanding.

Totally different from Zayne and Sekani. Zayne is calmer, really quiet. Sekani is a shy, very sweet boy, and slightly fearful...

Zayne enjoys playing board games even at a young age. Leona doesn't mind playing with him often. It's pretty funny when sometimes he ends up losing and looks at his 6 year old son like this: 🤨

He compliments Zayne anyway.

Sekani is undeniably more attached to his mother, since he is the type of child who likes to be pampered with affection and MC is always holding him in her arms.

But Leona also showers him with affection (in a more discreet way), so he enjoys being with his father as well. Leona makes him feel safe, so whenever he is scared, Sekani runs to his father.

Despite sometimes complaining, Leona spends a lot of time with them. A lot of time. MC soon realizes that it is him giving his children the affection and attention that he did not receive.

Also, Cheka joins his cousins to go and bother his uncle. He loves having someone to play with now!

Leona having his three children and nephew glued to him 24 hours a day. Okay, maybe I exaggerated. 8 hours a day.

MC often joins in on the fun. When playing tag, Leona is usually quick to catch her because he knows where she usually hides. He will jump on you without mercy and probably scare you, but he will quickly make you laugh with involuntary tickles.

Leona finds the kids easily. And the kids can find you easily when it's their turn. Hide and seek with beastmen is no fun.

At the end of the day, Leona watches you sleeping in his arms along with the children... and he thinks that love and being loved like that isn't bad at all.

[anonymousredactedconfessions]

Let's have a talk, shall we?

Major Trigger Warning for rape, false accusations, and mentions of child sex crimes

I let you guys get away with a lot of shit. I let you be a little bitter, or mean spirited, or pissed off. I let you guys vent and let out grievances and complain for the sake of complaining. And i do all of this because it is important to have a space that you can do so without fear of judgement, it is unhealthy for you to bottle up negative emotions. I provide this in a public space because with the way this fandom is, if I didn't many of you would be pressured into not doing so at all. This fandom has a habit of ostracizing those who have differing opinions and interpretations, those who wish to critique the art they consume, those who have unpopular opinions, and all of it is done with the utmost aggression and vitriol. The things that have been said to some of the people in this fandom genuinely makes me lose faith in humanity if i think about it too hard.

This blog exists explicitly to counteract that. I refuse to encourage or enable it. What you are doing is actively dangerous, and I won't be having it in the space I curate within this fandom.

If you haven't noticed, this is one of my rules:

It means that you are not allowed to come in my inbox and accuse people of serious harm over this fiction.

You will not come and accuse people of something as egregious as rape apologia in my inbox. You will not accuse people of rape, abuse, assault, or child abuse/rape/exploitation in my inbox.

These are serious real world issues, and the reason they are bad is because they cause direct harm to real living people who can feel pain and can be violated. Your disgust holds absolutely no ethical weight. At All. You should have the mental, emotional, and intellectual capability to understand the ethical difference between allegories for rape, stories with/about rape, erotica of rape, and actual real life people being raped. Making accusations of this weight over make believe is abhorrent, and as a matter of fact, it shows that you don't treat these tragedies with the weight or gravity that they deserve. If you believe that it is appropriate to accuse someone of violating another person like so because of the creation of or opinions about art, then you have some serious learning and growing to do as a person if you wish to navigate these topics with any level of maturity or respect towards victims.

There is no good that comes out of accusations such as these. They only ever serve to:

Demonstrate to victims that the tragedy of their abuse is as trivial as fanfiction/art that you deem nasty (but is ultimately ethical), or even something as inconsequential as someones' love for a fictional character.

Shame those who love these characters, or this art, or creating, into hiding their opinions for fear of harassment and serious accusations when they have done zero harm by enjoying it.

Stifle creation and participation in fandoms.

Limit the spread of ideas, interpretations, critique/criticism, and general opinions in the fandom, which just turns fandoms into boring echo chambers devoid of variety and creativity.

Encourage actual censorship and moral policing. (More on that on this reblog by @escapedaudios on a post of mine. Thank you Escaped for your two cents, they are much appreciated 💖)

Spread the incredibly harmful idea that people are defined by the art they enjoy. You cannot accurately judge a person’s values or morals based on what tropes and themes they enjoy in fiction. You create an environment and culture incredibly dangerous for vulnerable individuals (like minors) when you tell them that they can know who is safe to trust based on whether they consume "the good kind" or "the bad kind" of fiction. This makes it so very easy for predators to virtue signal about fiction to lure in potential victims to abuse.

The majority of you are very good and well behaved when it comes to this, but the amount of people i have had come into my inbox and accuse others of being rapists with no evidence other than "they made X" or "they like Y" is not zero. And i will not be satisfied until it is.

This is all i have to say about the subject.

[olderthannetfic]

Just gonna... not exactly vent because I'm not pissed off just baffled, but gonna ramble about something that's consistently happened to me, which is my fanart getting mistagged when people reblog it.

I like to draw genderbends of the male main character in a fandom, and because I like girls with small titties and short hair, these genderbends aren't... super obviously different from how the guy normally looks? Admittedly this one's a bit on me, but I go out of my way to tag my art with every genderbend tag imaginable so nobody stumbled across it by accident. But that means that once it gets reblogged and has a degree of separation from its original tags, people start tagging it with stuff like "omg look at my beautiful boy! He's so cute!"

Another time someone reblogged an OC I'd created for the same fandom and tagged them as a canon character because I'd drawn them with that character's hair colour for funsies.

Like I said, I'm not really mad about this happening, but I feel kind of bad about it because it feels like I'm deceiving these people? Unintentionally? Particularly the genderbend stuff, because I know it can be contentious, I'm left anxious about whether or not the rebloggers would still enjoy it if they knew it was genderbend? But I feel like going into their askboxes like "hey you tagged this wrong" would be making too big of a deal about it, and it's honestly not that important.

I think I'm just going to have to start including this stuff in the work's actual captions so it doesn't happen in the future... I've always found plastering the captions with disclaimers to be kinda obnoxious which is why I didn't do it before, but at least then it will persist through reblogs and I won't feel like I'm tricking people by accident...

--

[kaw05ru]

Navigating through "Art Block" as an Artist

Art block is something almost every artist experiences at some point. It can come from burnout, lack of motivation, or simply feeling stuck with no ideas. Just like writer’s block, it’s a frustrating but common struggle for anyone deeply involved in their craft. I’ve dealt with art block many times, and it can be especially hard when I have deadlines to meet. It’s discouraging, but it’s not something that lasts forever. No matter how stuck you feel, you can always find your way back to creating.

For me, the biggest challenge is dealing with burnout. I go through long periods where I feel completely unmotivated to draw, usually because of mental exhaustion, stress, or bad time management. It’s frustrating because art is such a big part of my life, and when I feel drained, it affects both my personal projects and the creative work I need to do for academics.

Since I’m a digital artist, I also run into technical issues. Sometimes my drawing tablet, computer, or my usual devices for illustration aren't accessible when I need them, and by the time I finally get the chance to draw, I’ve already lost motivation. It’s a cycle that can be really discouraging, but I try not to let it stop me from creating altogether.

Despite these struggles, I remind myself that art block doesn’t take away my passion for creating. One of the biggest things that helps me is taking breaks. If you’re an artist reading this, take this as a reminder to rest when you need to. It’s really easy to end up pushing yourself too hard, especially when you feel pressured to always be making something. But if you don’t give yourself time to recharge, you’ll just burn out even more. Stepping away from art for a little while can actually help you come back feeling more refreshed and inspired.

When I feel uninspired, I try to find ways to spark my creativity again. One thing that always helps is looking at art from other artists I admire, whether that’s on social media or in shows, comics, and movies I love. Fanart is a huge creative outlet for me. I enjoy drawing my favorite characters and even associating them with songs that inspire me. It makes the process more fun and personal.

I also love creating original characters (OCs). The first illustration below is an example of one of my OCs. A lot of my OCs are inspired by characters I already love in media, but I also take inspiration from real-life people, including myself. There’s nothing wrong with pulling inspiration from different places as long as you’re being respectful and making something unique.

Sometimes, inspiration comes from the environment around me. I know some artists work best in certain settings. For example, maybe they like a cozy atmosphere, a specific kind of lighting, or even background noise like music or rain sounds. Paying attention to what makes you feel comfortable can help a lot when you’re struggling to create.

Emotions can also be a strong source of inspiration. Some artists channel their inner feelings into their work, whether those feelings are good or bad. There’s even a concept called "vent art", where artists express their emotions, often negative ones through their artwork. I personally think vent art can be a great way to turn feelings like stress or frustration into something meaningful. The second illustration below is one of my artworks which I based off of my own personal feelings and experiences, inspired by using symbolism in the elements of the illustration.

The most important thing to remember as an artist is that you don’t have to be constantly creating to be a “real” artist. It’s easy to feel like you need to be productive all the time, but art isn’t about how often you create—it’s about the passion behind it. Every artist goes at their own pace, and it’s okay to take breaks when you need to.

Art block can be frustrating, but it’s not the end of your creativity. Sometimes, you just need to step back, find inspiration in new places, and give yourself time to recharge. So don’t stress too much about it. Your creativity will come back when you’re ready!

[turuin]

Inktober

So, in a few days it will be Inktober again.

Many (ill-informed and arrogant) people think Inktober is a silly thing, a show-off, a stupid challenge that has nothing to do with art, and generally despise those who partake in it. We will not talk of such people: they are just another specimen of the archaic "internet troll", and we know well one should not feed trolls. They are only expressing themselves to grief others, or to spoil their fun, and this is pretty much their top aspiration for their internet persona - and I think this speaks volumes of what kind of people they might be in real life.

I'll tell you this instead: Inktober was the very reason why I started considering my stupid office-time doodles something more than that; and, potentially, the very thing that made me understand a couple of important things about art in general.

So, it boils to this: you have a list of verbal prompts, one per day, which you pick from many lists. Yes, there is an official Inktober challenge, set up by Jake Parker and normally available on Instagram and on its own website. Parker was part of an internet controversy, a couple of years ago, about having stolen the idea for an Inking Textbook from another very good artist, Alphonso Dunn; whether you choose to use Parker's prompts or entirely different ones, though, is entirely up to you. I have skipped them, back then, and then I started using them again a couple of years afterwards. They are handy, and you can use them without sponsoring Parker at all, if you feel like it (he has trademarked the Inktober brand for sketchbooks but you can't really trademark a challenge, so hashtags are still free to use).

List controversy aside, the fun thing is that it asks you to draw once per day, possibly with ink (but not solely, and rules are entirely up to you about the medium you want to use whether it is digital or traditional) for a total of 31 days, the whole month of October.

Back when I started, I didn't think myself capable of doing this until the end, and surely my skill was much lower than today. And yet, Inktober taught me many things:

stick to the plan, but if you skip a day, or multiple days, don't worry! Nobody is paying you for that, and there are many people who will keep drawing from the list well into November, but when you decide to draw for the day, put yourself into it - don't do it just because. Inktober is not about speed or skill, it's about challenging your brain and hand on interpretation and execution.

share your art. It is basic? Share it. It is made at the top of your abilities? Share it. People are insulting it? SHARE IT. You have to be able to disconnect emotionally from your art when it is done. You like it? Fine! You don't like it? Fine! I've made it. It is there. Do what you will with it. I have already accomplished my goal: the process.

It will be an occasion for you to learn. You never used ink? Try! You never used ink pens? Try! You never used an old brush with dried ink on it to create strange effects? TRY! Inktober might as well be about trying anything that crosses your mind. Also, you don't need expensive tools; a sheet of paper and a ballpoint pen can, and often will, be enough.

People mock you because you do Inktober or are stressed out because you post Inktober updates? That is a perfect time to remind them of the existence of the "unfollow" button. It does wonders with people who live in troll caves.

You feel like you need to vent? You feel like you're being left behind and stress because you think you will not complete it? First of all: VENT. Your blog / page / online space is yours and you should keep in mind that whatever you post has to do with YOU, not others. People may not like what you post, it's fine. They can unfollow, or start their personal rant in their online space about you - at the end, we are all passing by, if people want to live their life in anger or ranting about your art or your blog, it's their liver, not yours. No, that's not a typo: I'm actually referring to their liver, which probably will not be in very good conditions to start with.

People give you unsolicited advice or opinion on your art? Gracefully nod, and forget about it one fraction of a second later. When you will need advice, you will ask for it, and welcome it. My suggestion is you stick by that rule for pretty much everything in your life: you should be asking, that is of paramount importance, and learning how to ask something is at least as important, but nobody should force you into their opinion. TL;DR: fuck'em opinons.

Again: don't fall in love with your art. It's a piece of paper; you can burn it afterwards. You already possess that art within your hands. It is lost forever? It's ok. You have made it. It existed. You ceased caring about it as soon as it was on paper. Let it go. It is not yours anymore. Let people make what they will of it. You are already unto the next one.

So: I will partake in Inktober, and vent, and chat about it, and post art. I will also do this in our community, https://www.tumblr.com/communities/ars-gratia-artis , and for the time being, I will allow people who want to share their art, participate in the community and not be toxic about it, to join with a link. I would also very much love for community members to attempt Inktober, even with a little doodle whenever they are able. It's fun, I promise!

If you want to join our community, Inktober or not, here's the link:

[campgender]

Hi, my friend has a chronic illness that flares up sometimes and we've been wanting to hang out but it has gotten cancelled a couple times lately bc of her not feeling well enough on the day. I want to ask her how she feels cuz I care abt her a lot and want an update but 1, I don't want her to feel pressured or like I'm asking just to ask can we hang out now, and not bc I care abt how she's feeling (does that make sense? I may be overthinking this) and 2, I genuinely wanna know how she's doing but idk what to say if she responds with her not being better, sometimes u don't feel better and that's ok but I always want to offer comfort somehow or just convey my friendship? but I feel the same everytime and don't want to sound repetitive ?

Any thoughts?

this is really kind of you & it means so much to me that you want to support your friend & are putting so much thought into it! my response is inherently based in my own experience to an extent & everybody’s different, but a lot if not all of this is stuff i’ve heard regularly from other chronically ill people. of course, don’t say anything you don’t mean – if some of this isn’t the case for you, just adapt accordingly :)

i understand worrying about being repetitive but i think that’s totally okay to do! for one thing, it can be difficult to remember things period when you’re ill, especially during a flare, & for another, internalized + societal ableism is a hell of a force. it never hurts to have a reminder that not everyone is trying to force ableist expectations onto you + your friendship & that someone cares about you!

i think you can definitely tell your friend pretty much what you told me! like, “hey, it’s okay if you aren’t feeling up for responding but i just wanted to check on you! not trying to pressure you to hang out or anything, i just care about you & how you’re doing”

honestly the most important + supportive thing people have ever told me is that it’s okay if the answer is “bad.” i’m literally like surprised pikachu meme every time somebody offers to let me vent about having a rough time & then it helps me just to talk about it. it’s really socially unacceptable to talk about chronic pain & a lot of people get frustrated when you’re complaining about the same thing & there’s not really anything they can do, so just the opportunity to be like “yeah shit fucking sucks right now” means a lot.

obv the appropriateness of this depends on the person & their relationship to disability but most of the time i’m very like, radical acceptance / embracing / etc about the fact that i’m probably just gonna get sicker, so sometimes when i’m having a rough time emotionally & am like “what if i’m this bad for the rest of my life” my gf (who doesn’t have chronic pain / chronic illness) will say something like “then i can’t wait to be there with you ❤️” & it’s more meaningful to me than i can begin to put into words.

again everybody’s different but for me one of the biggest things is when disability stuff just… isn’t a big deal to the other person. which, it’s totally okay for you to need support from others when someone you care about is going through a hard time & when things change! but abled people are constantly horrified about like, every aspect of my life, so being able to talk casually about symptoms & somebody mirror the mood / tone i set – laugh if i’m joking, be upset about the ableism i experience & not my body itself if i’m complaining about people being weird about it, taking things as they come – is so affirming.

other things that have been helpful + meaningful for me are friends sending me notes, stickers, & art in the mail – having something tangible can make me feel more “real” & part of the world, something i struggle with due to being homebound – & peer support around medical neglect, which often just looks like talking to someone after a doctor’s appointment & them reaffirming my reality / experiences & saying i didn’t deserve to be treated that way.

oh one other change in language i’ve made over time & probably picked up from a few other ill people in my life is a sort of realistic encouragement – there’s not necessarily anything wrong with “i hope you feel better soon!” because like, i get that the message is well-intentioned, but it can be awkward & difficult to receive when you don’t know if that’s gonna happen. instead, i try to tell people something like “i hope you get a bit of relief soon” or “i hope things are a little easier tomorrow.” a 7/10 pain day may be horrifying for most people, but when you’ve had a streak of 9s, it can be a much-needed taking the edge off, & i try to make space for that breadth of experience in my language.

i’ve answered a few similar questions before so i’ll add my “asks” & “faq” tags on my chronic illness blog in the reblogs if you want to browse! much love to you & your friend and feel free to lmk if you have any other questions 💓💓

[gigidragonbbxxx]

a personal struggle + an education

this is all just gigi's opinions + thoughts

Reader, I'm struggling with empathy right now.

Don't worry, I'm not suffering from a personality pathology, I promise I am quite sympathetic and empathetic. It's just battling the feeling of wanting to be kind but also seeing a major problem and knowing I need to get it off my chest.

Let me give it to yall straight (with tweaked/paraphrased details to protect privacy and not to out anyone):

I saw a favorite loass coach/twt account/subliminal creator make fun of an "old timey" English sentence either from Neville Goddard or Edward Art. They proceeded to say that they "hate" it and "why can't they just say it simpler". and then someone else commented "they're talking bullshit fr".

The convo thread on twt devolved into an echo chamber that essentially boiled down to the old fool's adage "If I don't understand it, it must be stupid and not worth it."

This really triggered me because

The phrase quoted was not that hard to understand.

It was clear these women were not educated

Why am I judging or mad at people for their ignorance? (this is why I kept quiet on twt and went here to vent. I acknowledge that two things can be true, I can be kind and still be honest.)

I was and currently am still wrestling with these things within me.

On one hand I don't want to judge. I want to be inclusive and welcoming and supportive.

On the other hand - yall don't look educated, yall wind up looking dumb.

I'll say a harsh truth yall and you can go argue with a damn wall but I know I'm right: stupidity is not cute.

My Hot Take (not so hot when you think about it)

The Law of Assumption rewards those who feed their mind with knowledge

Before you argue with me, think about it. Seriously.

I don't want to seem ableist if someone suffers from dyslexia or if someone struggles in school. It's totally okay to have different paths to learning. The importance is still obtaining the information. You can read or listen to the audiobook, etc. The paths to knowledge are varied but in the end the result is the same - THE KNOWING.

The "old timey" sentence that the creator complained about COULD BE READ BY NINTH GRADERS BECAUSE OF SHAKESPEARE EXPOSURE.

That's why I was exasperated. They were complaining about English (the only language in which they are fluent) that is regularly taught to 14 year olds.

Guys. Stand up. Please stand the fuck up.

Who in this world is gonna take you seriously without BASIC COMPETENCY in literature or math?

Lemme roast some of yall if you want to disagree:

Yall wanna be master manifesters and claim to understand the double slit experiment but can't even name the fundamental laws of science or explain them.

Yall wanna be successful in your businesses and don't know how to calculate your profits.

Yall wanna be seen as intellectuals who "understand" more than the majority of the population and yall can't even fucking read Descartes or Shakespeare.

Yall wanna be content creators and don't know how to proofread.

One time I bought an affirmation tape that came with a pdf with all the affirmations listed. The tape itself was excellent but the pdf was riddled with errors! It makes me sad because something that can help change your life, like a sleep tape to saturate, "cheapens" in its authenticity at the price of minor errors. Sigh.

Let me tell you that 100% you can be successful in this world just by going to the end and claiming it.

BUT YOU LOSE A LOT OF TREASURE BY NOT GIVING YOURSELF THE TOOLS TO DIG FOR IT.

THERE IS SO MUCH FOUNDATIONAL INFORMATION WITHIN THESE "OLD TIMEY" TEXTS.

and if you don't like any of it and just wanna watch sammy ingram and manifest like that THEN GO AHEAD BUT DONT CLAIM TO NOT UNDERSTAND A SENTENCE AND THEN CALL IT BULLSHIT.

just be honest and own it!

be honest that you don't wanna read, that you don't wanna be academic and that's 100% okay and you're still beautiful and worth everything but

do not put down the value of what is being said just because you don't understand it

That's why I am frustrated, reader.

I am educated enough to recognize when someone's ignorance is just that - ignorance.

But I am human enough to be annoyed.

So please give yourselves some grace and take the time to appreciate knowledge. Without the knowledge of the law of assumption, we wouldn't all be here interacting with one another.

xx, gigi

p.s. for those of you who are more familiar with reading the Bible via the law of assumption lens - I beg you to think of Solomon. He was asked by God what he would like and Solomon chose wisdom over material things. Why is that? Because through wisdom comes the ability to know how to obtain all one's desires. Food for thought.

[magpiefngrl]

8, 14 & a wildcard of your choice for the love your fandom asks, pls and thank youuuuu!! if those do not spark joy for any reason or you've done them, feel free to swap out for anything you like!! xox

Hello, hello! Thanks for the ask xx

8. you hope more people will come to appreciate ___ (a ship, a trope, an episode, etc)

I wrote a Voldemort Wins AU (The Boy Who Died) four years ago and I'd love to see more stories or art exploring that AU. There are so many juicy directions one can take it and I love me some angst. (I think there's been a few fics featuring a Voldemort Wins AU since I wrote TBWD, I should prob go track them down.) I know Voldemort Wins AU is a hard-sell, dystopian settings aren't what drarry fans tend to flock to, but I'm very much here for it.

14. the ship that always makes you smile

Oh that's actually a hard one, because drarry authors explore so many combinations of ships and rarepairs and it's very tough to choose. Also, although I love some rarepairs a normal amount, they often don't make me smile as such (prongsfoot is mostly about the angst and the sex, for example).

But you know who makes me smile, even now as I'm thinking about them? Luna and Neville. He's incredibly shy and awkward and she doesn't give a fuck about conventions: they're the cutest.

Wildcard! I used a random generator:

24. how has fandom positively impacted your life?

Oh thank you, random generator, awesome question!

Fandom has made a huge, real life difference to my life. I know I'm a bit absent now because I've learned that less is more (for me) regarding the time I spend on fandom, but the benefits have been immense.

First and foremost, I've made some very good friends. I've met several of them in real life too. I spent 4 days in Bologna with a fandom pal. I have people I chat to fairly regularly and I know I can rely on them for writing advice or just to be there when I need to vent.

Second, before fandom, I'd been writing original for a long time. Although I'd written a few short stories, I struggled with finishing a longer fic. I thought I'd never be able to do it. And lo and behold, when I fell into drarry, I completed a 36k fic! The longest completed work I'd managed back then. It gave me the confidence to know that I can finish longer works, I'm not incapable of it. I also learned what kind of writer I am. When I wrote original, I was inexperienced and I consulted a lot of websites about writing advice which is all SHIT (ask me about it) and it was one of the main reasons I'd struggled. But fanfic took the pressure of this-will-be-seen-by-agents-so-it'd-better-be-perfect. I wrote for fun and discovered my writing process along the way. This was an invaluable gift.

Third and equally important, being in fandom and writing fanfic in the heyday of a super popular ship gave me the recognition I was starved for. Writing alone in a solitary room can make one doubt whether she's any good or whether she's kidding herself. But receiving comments on my stories, knowing hundreds of eyes have seen them, possibly thousands, gave me the warmth and joy and reassurance that perhaps, if I am lucky and try hard, I can touch some people's hearts. That my writing isn't ridiculous or a waste of time or that I'm kidding myself. Again: an invaluable gift.

love your fandom asks

[krissiefox]

Fire Safety Tips!

Photo of the recent fire my family members were rescued from! Thank you Fire Fighters! Due to my families recent scary brush with an apartment building fire, I have been looking up general fire safety tips and as well as tips specific to electrical outlet fires. I wanted to write and share what I found as well - this list is a mix of stuff I found online, stuff my parents taught me, and things I learned through safety videos in my various workplaces - so please spread this around! It could help save lives!

Note: This list is made by a USA resident so some things may be different in other countries. A good example is your emergency number to call in case of fire, make sure you know the right one for your country! In the USA it's 911.

Also, if I goofed up and any electricians or firefighters are here reading this, please let me know so I can fix any errors. Last thing I want is to spreading misinformation about safety, there's enough of that crap going around on the internet.

The list is below the divider!

If your house has gutters outside, clean them so flying embers can't get in and ignite the clutter.

Have an emergency bag ready for if you need to quickly leave your home. Important items often include computers or hard drives with personal work or data stored on them, identification documents like passports and birth certificates, deeds, titles, and ownership paperwork, valuable art or collections, and anything of personal value like family photo albums. Invest in an external hard drive to backup your computer, and keep the hard drive with the rest of your valuable. Also consider archiving your important files online in case you lose your computer/hard drives. Likewise, consider making copies of family photos.

Shut off your air conditioning when you're not home.

Regularly cut your grass and clean up debris in the yard.

always have some water ready to put of small fires. But be careful! Throwing water on certain kinds of fires can make it WORSE, such as with a grease fire, which can cause hot grease to spatter at you.

Buy a fire extinguisher! Be attentive to type of fire extinguisher you use. Different lettered extinguishers are designed for different kinds of fires. ABC fire extinguishers are a good general type to get.

Don't leave a stove unattended!

Don't leave your dryer unattended while it's running. Clean the lint filter regularly.

Power strips and extension cords are handy, but if you go too overboard with them they can present a fire hazard, so take it easy on them. Try to unplug whatever gadgets you aren't using at the time.

Don't leave a lit candle unattended!

Keep your kitchen tidy.

Keep space heaters away from cloth and clothing. Turn them off before leaving a room.

Test your smoke alarms monthly. Replace smoke detectors every 10 years.

Keep the area around the dryer free of flammable items.

Check all your cords and wires for damage.

Avoid blocking the air vents on a laptop. These are located on the back and sides. put the laptop on a hard surface, not cloth.

Don't place anything on top of a radiator.

Keep large newspaper stacks away from any flammable materials

If you smoke, do so outside, make sure your ash trays are sturdy, and soak your cigarette butts in water before disposing of them

Also soak matches in water before throwing them away!

Dust your home regularly.

Don't put glassware near a window, the light passing through it could have "magnifying glass" laser effect.

If you get home and smell gas, DO NOT TURN ON ANY LIGHTS. If there is a gas leak this could be enough to spark an explosion.

If you can, get an electric stove instead of a gas stove, they're generally safer.

Keep aerosols such as spray paint bottles away from heat sources.

DON'T PUT GASOLINE IN A GARBAGE BAG! This one should be obvious, but people have done it….sighs

Keep a pan lid or baking sheet nearby while cooking, if a fire starts, covering the pan might help smother the fire.

Try to use LED lighting where you can, they don't get as hot as other types of light bulbs can.

If an electrical fire starts, flip your circuit breakers and turn off the power in your home.

Don't throw water on an electrical fire!

When you unplug things, pull on the plug and not the chord. Tugging the chord itself can damage it over time and become a fire hazard. Also be mindful of this when picking up items (don't pick a laptops power brick up by it's chord, for example). Doing this can not only help prevent fires but can also decrease wear and tear on your gadgets.

Check for flickering lights or scorch marks on power outlets. if you find any, it may be a good idea to get a professional electrician to take a look at your home.

Never use an extension cord with a major appliance like a dryer.

Be careful about putting nails or tacks in your walls, if you hit a wire, that could become a future fire hazard!

On your dryer, Make sure the air exhaust vent pipe is not restricted or crushed against the wall.

Clean your pans regularly, to prevent the buildup of grease that could potentially catch fire.

Plan an outside meeting spot with your family or roommates so in the event of a fire you can all quickly gather and make sure everyone got out safely.

If a doorknob feels hot during a fire, don't open it, as it could mean a fire is on the other side. Opening it could cause an air vacuum, throwing the flames right at you!

If there is a fire, stay low to the ground to avoid breathing smoke.

Many fire departments in the USA will install a smoke detector for free! After acquiring one, if you feel unsure about your ability to install it properly, give them a call!

if your home has more than 1 floor, put escape ladders in the upstairs rooms.

some sources: https://www.wikihow.life/Protect-Your-Home-from-a-Wildfire https://www.thezebra.com/resources/home/fire-hazards-at-home/ https://fixitinthehome.com/wall-outlet-caught-fire-what-to-do_ny/ https://www.bobvila.com/articles/prevent-electrical-fires/ https://youtu.be/fhKD1CS8pcM https://youtu.be/VyS18ksk8D8

[ninelivesart]

About Me (Kind of)

Doing this Drawing My Reads challenge this last year, made me realize there's a lot people don't know about me. You don't have to know anything about me, of course. But since I've had an uptick in followers, I thought I'd share a few things anyway. For context.

I'm a librarian! Technically a Library Clerk because I don't have my Master's. But this last year I got promoted to Programming Clerk. And I specifically run my library's Makerspace. Which means I get to play with cool, creative machines all day. This also means that I sometimes get to just vibe to audiobooks and draw stupid stuff (it's ideal). My primary focus at the moment is our laser printer. So I will 1000% be adding those creations into my rotation soon. Expect to see some SVG files and wooden bookmarks and things on my Etsy shop soon.

2. That being said, it's important to note that I hardly ever pay for books. I have access to a full library 40 hours a week. So please don't think I'm out here spending hundreds of dollars on these books. I very rarely pay for them.

3. My education is in books. I have a degree in English and Literature. I minored in Journalism. I didn't get to go to art school because there just weren't a lot of options for me back then. So I am a self-taught artist. And I'm lucky to have found a job that combines both of my passions.

4. I am a fully adult woman. I read a lot of very adult books. I'm closer to 40 than 20 and I have a teenage son. Please keep that in mind when interacting with me.

5. My reading tastes can sometimes seem contradictory. I love romances but I tend to stick to fantasy and scifi. I don't do contemporaries very often. And I don't read classics because chances are, I've already read it, analyzed it, wrote an essay on it, and read it again. I did my time and now I'm in debt for classic literature. I'm just trying to have fun. So sometimes I might diss a popular book and be very critical about it. And then turn around and wax poetic about alien smut. I don't expect much from the alien smut. I do expect more from serious books.

6. I pick my reads with a randomizer! This is why I sometimes take a long time getting to a sequel. I have made exceptions for a series I wanted to continue right away. And sometimes I roll again if I'm not in the mood for the book I got. I'm going to try to be a little stricter on this in 2024 though. With the exception of the audio books I listen to at work. I always search Libby for what's available now so I'm not wasting my work time, searching every book on my TBR to see if it's in.

7. You are more than welcome to send me suggestions! I'll probably just stick them on my TBR so I can't guarantee I'll read it quickly. But if you think I'll like it, feel free to recommend it. I'm also happy to talk books with you if you need someone to vent to about a book you know I've read.

8. You are also welcome to add me on Storygraph (beautawn) or TikTok (NineLivesArt). I'm stepping away from Goodreads, so you probably won't see a lot of updates on there. But I post drawing videos on TikTok and I update my Storygraph pretty regularly.

9. However, I don't do reviews! Why? They make me uncomfy! Sometimes I really need to marinate with a book before I decide if I like it or not. Rating systems make me anxious. And my mood alters my decisions. I also don't like being mean. I'm fine talking about my feelings with other readers, but I don't like leaving reviews. Especially if I plan to make art for it. Don't want to draw a lovely portrait and then bash the book.

10. I do plan to continue this project into the new year. But I am planning on doing it a little different. I have some other (non book related) projects I want to work on, and I want to push myself to focus more on the things I need to improve. I really want to focus on environments this year, so I'll be drawing scenes from the book instead. Which means I may not draw a book even if I loved it.

Thank you for following my reading/art journey! I didn't expect this silly little project to have such a positive response. I love when people talk books with me and I actually made friends with a few authors this year! So overall, it's been a very positive experience and I'm ready to jump into the New Year and see what it brings!

[snarkythewoecrow]

Okay, so when you make a post yourself, the first 5 or 6-ish tags are the ones that count, making sure it ends up with the right (or wrong) people. So if you want it to be seen, put the relevant tags first, then ramble if you like or add tags that you might use for the organization of your blog.

For example, when I post a fanfic, I tag the fandom, the characters, and relationships (in the most used forms, even if that means I tag 'Buck x Eddie' and 'Buck/Eddie'), and then after those, I toss on 'snarks writes' which is a tag that allows myself and others to search my blog for my writing

Now when reblogging something, what you add for tags doesn't affect anything (except possibly feelings, so maybe be nice). They are for you and only do anything for your blog (so don't worry that you're spamming a tag for tagging a reblog with a common one).

One thing tagging a reblog does is let you search your blog later for a certain post (some people have many tags set aside for different types of posts they may want to find later). But again, you don't need to do that. Do what makes you happy.

For instance, I try to tag reblogs that I might find useful later as 'useful stuff,' but the sky's the limit. You can don't need to make any kind of system, or you can be super organized

(also keep in mind that all the organized tags in the world might not help if tumblr is in a mood and pretending it's never seen a tag in its life)

Oh, and in reblogs, if you just want to sort of say something quietly, like it wasn't important enough to actually add to the post itself, then you can just say shit, whatever you want, whisper your opinions to your followers about things, or praise the OP for their art or writing (we like that). Reblog tags are really a place to just say shit and organize things on your blog

And lastly, the only other thing I can think of about tags would be that if you sort of want to vent to your followers and have a quiet little moment, you can make a blank post with, say, just a period in it, then you can ramble and vent to your heart's content

Oh, and also, if you see some tags that you know just need to be attached to the post for all to enjoy, then you can screenshot them or copy and paste and stick them on a reblog with a mention/credit to the creator

Okay, now that's all I can think of, good luck and happy tagging

i have no idea how tags work tbh, but i will figure it out. maybe. (i may need help, but the will to not bother anyone to ask how it works is too strong 😔)

[themetalvirus]

hi, i can tell some of my followers are from twitter, so here's some tips:

LIKING a post increments the note counter and lets the original poster know you saw the post.

liking art is appreciated, but does not get more people to see it. liking vent posts is also a way of nonverbally patting someone on the back / nodding along sympathetically. likes basically just give the original poster the info that you saw their post and felt the need to interact with it in some way but didn't have anything to add and didn't want to share it.

REBLOGGING is the main verb of this site. the etiquette is hard to nail down for newbies, and i think it's the second hardest thing to grasp for a lot of people.

reblogging is extremely important. if you do not reblog posts, the posts will not be shared, and there is no other efficient way to spread posts. your dashboard is populated by people you follow (if you have every algorythmic recommendation turned off, which is HIGHLY RECOMMENDED to curate your experience; those who use tumblr regularly and have for years have "based on your likes" and "best stuff first" turned off) and if you do not populate your followers' dashboards then they will not have any reason to follow you. they cannot see posts you have liked on their dashboards.

if you do not reblog posts and only like posts, you will be assumed to be a bot and blocked. even if there's evidence you are a person, going through someone's whole blog and reblogging absolutely nothing while spam liking for a half hour straight may very well also get you blocked. every like shows up on the op's feed AND in the blog you're browsing's feed. be polite!

when you comment on a post in the main post body while reblogging (not in tags or in replies), that comment will stick to the post and be seen when others reblog it. it's considered rude to add a comment to the main post body without having something meaningful to add, whether it be a joke, more information, or continuing a discussion. commenting something like "yes, lol" adds clutter to OP's notes and the notes of whoever you reblogged from, and others down the reblog chain will have to manually remove your junk comment.

be kind! reblog! share! there are other ways to comment on posts, like...

REPLYING which is an alternate way to get your comments to stick to a post semi-invisibly.

everyone who opens the notes can see your reply, like when you open replies on twitter, but it won't show up attached to the post, like twitter. this also pings the op and the person whose blog you left the reply on. it's useful for questions or conversations that you want to have but don't want on your blog! it's great to add feedback to a post without sharing it.

THE TAGS are the most difficult part of tumblr culture to grasp for a lot of people.

tags can be used as organizational tools (for instance, categorizing pictures or fandom posts or your own posts) and can be browsed either exclusively on your blog or globally. if you put organizational tags like #photo on a reblogged post, it will not show up in the global tags, but will show up when you look at the #photo tag on your blog. if the post is original and not reblogged, the post will show up both in global tags and in your blog's tag, so if you search #photo on either your blog or the search function, it'll show up.

however... tags are the primary way people comment on posts. it is a tidy way to say "lol" or "OH MY GOD???" or make a small, potentially funny quip that you don't want to stick to the main post. commenting in tags is customary and will make you look more like a local. if the post is funny, it's normal to say in the tags "i snorted" or "i am on the FLOOR" or something like that. you can say pretty much any comment in the tags as long as it's broken up between multiple different ones.

if you want someone to know how much you appreciate their art, leave a comment in the tags and the op will see it! your tags also show up in the notes of the person you reblogged from, so, for example, if you wanna say hi, you can say "hi [friend's name]" and they will see it in their activity. (i recommend using DMs for this though, lol)

if you never ever talk in the tags and never ever make your own posts, people will have no clue who you are and will have no clue what you think or what you want to create. if you enjoy that, then go ahead! but talking in tags is how you make your blog your own without your comment sticking on others' reblogs. it's also a way to mumble under your breath on your own posts, make little additions that people can see on the original post but not on reblogs!

i recommend really trying to get to know how to talk in tags instead of adding comments directly to posts you'd like to share. it helps everybody!

aaand that's all i've got

[sketching-shark]

LMK fandom: Oh, what do we do about this guy who has nothing but hurt Xiaotian, tried to replace Sun Wukong and his crew, hurt Tripitaka and ordered servants to cannibalize a monkey? Oh I know! We’ll turn him into our little meow meow~ he’s so innocent and Sun Wukong is obviously the villain!

What doesn’t help is this idea is perpetuated by multiple fan fic writers and artists for some reason. Especially some aus they make that turn SWK into a bastard for the sake of the story rather than considering cultural context and thinking they should be respectful.

And almost everyone lets them get away with it just because the art or fanfic is good and they get so popular that no one can point what is actually wrong without feeling like they’re going to get attacked.

I'm starting to feel like my blog is the one anons go to specifically to vent their frustrations about the Six Eared Macaque in his lego monkey show form & the associated fandom lmao. But I guess this makes sense, as I’ve had fun quasi-dragging him before & will in fact use this anon submission as an opportunity to have my own, to put it academically, bitch fest about not just this fandom's favorite protagonist-traumatizing meow meow, but about the way villains are often treated in not just fanon, but increasingly in canon works as well. But same policy as with the last anon; I'll post my opinions below the cut, and as fandoms love to say, don’t like don't read if you don't want to see me dunking on the six eared simian & common fandom tendencies towards villains.

Oh man I would say where would you even begin with this but anon you’ve pretty much started yourself with my main gripe with a lot of ways that the Six-Eared Macaque is portrayed in fandom; there seems to be this unspoken agreement that his acts of violence towards Sun Wukong, Qi Xioatian, and Qi Xioatian’s loved ones are either to be framed as somewhat or totally justified, to be immediately forgiven/excused, or to simply & completely be ignored. Like friends maybe this is just me not seeing the proper posts but while the fandom is inundated with art and fanfics of Macaque as a generally decent individual & a true member of team good guy, I have yet to see one person address the fact that this monkey literally kidnapped & mind-controlled Xiaotian’s best friend and father figures & forced them to brutalize Xiaotian while ol’ Six Ear looked on and laughed (X_X). Like this kind of fandom villain treatment is definitely not something that’s solely at work for Monkie Kid, but it is kind of nutty how fandoms will swing between yelling that people should be allowed to like villains without even mild critique, and then will just flat-out not address the villainous behavior, and will even bend over backwards to frame even characters who committed genocide as just poor innocent widdle victims who need a hug. At its worst, I’ve even seen tons of people in a fandom get really angry at other people who don’t like a villain, and will even start accusing those people of hating real-life mentally disabled or abused individuals all because they don’t like the fandom’s favorite literal war criminal. The Monkie Kid fandom is FAR more chill & better than a lot of other fandoms I’ve come across in that regard, but that is an exceedingly low bar, & the tendency to woobify certain kinds of villains-- as with Macaque and the extreme emphasis on his bad boy/sad boy thing--is very much at work.  

 I’ve also talked before about a kind of monoculturalization of certain character interpretations and story beats in fandoms, and one of the more popular ones that seems to be applied to Macaque a lot is the “hero actually bad, villain actually good” cliche, as observable from the general fandom assumption that Mr. Six-Ears he wasn’t even slightly lying or remembering things through a rose-tinted or skewed lens when he gave his version of his and Sun Wukong’s past. Like at this point it seems the possibility that people WILL NOT even consider is that Sun Wukong never did & still doesn't care that much about the Six Eared Macaque (in JTTW they weren’t sworn brothers & in Monkie Kid the only thing the monkey king really said to Macaque before attacking him was a pretty contemptuous "Aren't you ever going to get sick of living under my shadow?," & responds to his "beloved friend" getting blown up with "You did good, bud" to Qi Xiaotian, who did the exploding), or that their original fight may in fact have mostly been instigated by Macaque. After all, to repeat what this anon summarized & what I've said before about their original JTTW context (& in an example of the things that do feel like it's often lost in translation) is that the Six Ear Macaque was a villain not just because he beat up the Tang Monk, but because he wanted to take over Sun Wukong's entire life and identity so he could have all that glory, prestige, and power for himself. To quote the macaque himself from the Anthony C. Yu translation, "I struck the T'ang monk and I took the luggage...precisely because I want to go to the West all by myself to ask Buddha for the scriptures. When I deliver them to the Land of the East, it will be my success and no one else's. Those people of the South Jambudvipa Continent will honor me then as their patriarch and my fame will last for all posterity." And in order to do this, the Six Eared Macaque had apparently made Sun Wukong's "little ones," his monkey family, his captives through either trickery or force, and gotten a number of them to take on the appearance of Tang Sanzang and the other pilgrims. It's also made clear that in very direct contrast to Sun Wukong, he doesn't care about these monkeys beyond how they might serve him. In fact, after Sha Wujing kills the monkey posing as him the Six Eared Macaque not only all but immediately replaces him with another, but also "told his little ones to have the dead monkey skinned. Then his meat was taken to be fried and served as food along with coconut and grape wines." So this monkey is not only willing to risk the lives of a lot of other monkeys for his own personal benefit, but is also a literal cannibal. And yes yes, I know a lot of people have argued that Monkie Kid shouldn't be considered a direct sequel to JTTW & that's fair enough (for example, Sun Wukong probably shouldn't be smashing anyone into a meat patty in a children's cartoon lol). And of course, it needs to be noted that there are a buttload of really out there & really cursed pieces of media based on JTTW & that were created in China. Yet the above description is the oft-ignored in the west original facet of the Six Eared Macaque's character. And it is this selfishness, entitlement, and treatment of other individuals as tools for his own self-serving ends  that is, from where I’m standing, still very much present in Monkie Kid. Like besides repeatedly going out of his way to physically and psychologically traumatize Xioatian, with the last episode Macaque seemed to be going right back to his manipulative ways. I’ve seen people frame their last conversation as Macaque softening to Xioatian a little bit, but personally that read a lot more like that common tactic among abusers where even after they’ve hurt you they’ll dangle something you want or need over your head (in Macaque’s case, the promise of desperately needed training and information about a serious looming threat), with the implication that you’ll only get it if you do what they want you to, such as, in this case, Xioatian going back to Macaque as his student even after having been so terribly hurt by this monkey, which would give Macaque power over Xiaotian and probably Sun Wukong as a result. And it is this violence and manipulation that it seems the fandom at large has tacitly decided shouldn’t even be addressed, instead leaning more towards a (and this is an exaggeration) “Six-Eared Macaque my poor meow meow Sun Wukong has always been bad & has always been wrong about literally everything” reading. 

And while it is the case that I am not Chinese and feel that as such it would be best left to someone who actually comes from that background to provide more context into how common interpretations of the Six Eared Macaque from China may clash really badly with the stuff the western fandom creates, it also must be noted that, as much as we all want to have fun in fandom & in spite of all the out-there versions of JTTW from China, we westerners should recognize that there is a very long and very ugly history of western countries stripping other cultures’ important religious and literary works for parts & mashing them into their own thing while implying or even insisting that what they present provides a true understanding of the original piece. And while I trust most individuals in regards to Monkie Kid are able to step back and think “this is a lego cartoon and not a set guide for how I should understand JTTW” (especially given the insistence that JTTW and Monkie Kid should be considered there own separate works) there does nevertheless seem to be something of a tendency to take the conclusions people come to, for example, about Sun Wukong’s characteristic in his lego form & then assume that’s just reflective to Sun Wukong as a totality. I imagine a good portion of this is due to people not reading JTTW & especially to not having easy access to solid information or answers about JTTW’s many different facets (like geez awhile ago I was trying to get a clear answer on what is considered the most accurate translation of the names of Sun Wukong’s six sworn brothers & got like 5 different responses lmao), but that tendency to take a western fandom interpretation & run with it instead of doing any background research or questioning said interpretation is still very much at play. As such, & as made prominent in the way people have been interpreting the dynamic between Sun Wukong and the Six Eared Macaque in the lego monkey show, tbh it does seem kind of shitty for western creators & audience to sometimes go really out of their way to ignore all of this original cultural & narrative context for the sake of Angst (TM) in Macaque's favor, demonizing Sun Wukong, and shipping the monkey king with his evil twin (X_X).

And speaking of which, even beyond the potential inherent creepiness & revulsion that can be inspired by this specific ship given common interpretations of the og classic's original meaning (again, it's my understanding, given both summaries of translated Chinese academic texts I've been kindly provided with, my own reading of the Anthony C. Yu translation of JTTW, & vents from a number of Chinese people I've seen on this site, that the Six-Eared Macaque is commonly interpreted in China as having originated from Sun Wukong himself as a living embodiment of his worst traits, hence why only Buddha can tell the difference between them & why the monkey king is much more slow to violence after he kills the macaque), I'd argue that in the face of all the uwu poor widdle meow meow portrayals lego show Macaque is, especially if you include JTTW's events, still in the role of “Sun Wukong but worse” as he is very much a violent & selfish creep. Like he was basically running around in JTTW wearing a Sun Wukong fursuit, but there he had the sole reason of wanting to replace Sun Wukong wholesale so he could have all the good things in the monkey king's life without actually having to work as hard for them. But if you combine that with Macaque now claiming that he used to be best friend with Sun Wukong in his pre-journey days (something that's made funny from a JTTW context given that that status actually belongs to the Demon Bull King lol), his original violence has now blown into this centuries long and really unhealthy obsession with the monkey king. Like he's apparently gone from wanting to literally be Sun Wukong to being so obsessed with getting revenge on Sun Wukong that he's got basically nothing else going on in his life. Like he's only appeared in two episodes but...does he have any friends? Any family? A career or even a hobby that DOESN'T center the monkey king? Anything at all outside of his "get revenge on and/or kill Sun Wukong/use his successor as my personal punching bag” thing? Like dude! That is extremely creepy and extremely bad for everyone all around! As I’ve said before, this seeming refusal to see beyond the past or to do something that doesn’t involve Sun Wukong in some capacity is a trait that makes Macaque an interesting and somewhat tragic villain--he even seems to be working as Sun Wukong’s reflection in a mirror darkly, with lego show Sun Wukong pretty clearly not being able to heal from his own past which is hinted to be defined by one loss after another, and with Monkie Kid even kind of having these two characters somewhat follow their JTTW characterizations in that in the latter half of the journey Sun Wukong often gets sad & starts crying in the face of what seems insurmountable odds (& Monkie Kid Sun Wukong does seem to be hiding some serious depression behind a cheerful facade), whereas the Six-Eared Macaque retains a worse version of Sun Wukong’s pre-journey characteristic of getting pissed and lashing out if things don’t go his way--but it’s also what would make any current friendship or romantic relationship between these monkeys horrific. Although to be fair even the fandom seems to recognize this in an unconscious way, in that a lot of the art & fanfic seems to swing erratically between them kissing & screaming at each other in yet another example of bog-standard fandom adulation of romanticized toxic relationships lol.  

At the end of the day, of course, this is nothing new. You'll find versions of this dynamic across a ton of fandoms and now even canonical work. And as such, I can only look at this kind of popularized relationship dynamic with a kind of resigned weariness whenever it pops up, & my frustrated question with the popularity of this kind of pairing is the exact same one that I have for a multitude of blatantly toxic villain/hero ships, given common fandom discourse & the tendency to either ignore or justify the villain's actions & demonize the hero: if you're THAT convinced that everything is the hero's fault, if you believe THAT much that the hero is the one in the wrong for the villain's pain and their subsequent actions, then why are you so set on them not only becoming a romantic pair, but framing this get-together as a good thing? Like I know we contain multitudes but that's waaay too many contradictions for me to wrap my head around. And it definitely doesn’t help that one branch of underlying reasoning behind this kind of pairing seems to be the ever-present “you break it, you fix it” mentality, where the assumption is that if you’re in a failing, abusive, and/or generally toxic relationship (platonically or romantically), if you put in enough time and effort & attempts to compromise, you’ll be able to restore/have the relationship you dreamed of, even with someone who hurt you really badly. And this assumption isn’t limited to fandom: I’d even argue that it’s everywhere in the culture, hence why a lot of people feel like they “failed” if they have to get a divorce or make the choice to leave an unhealthy friendship. Personally, I feel like people could really benefit from more stories about how it is not only the case that the people you hurt don’t owe you their forgiveness & you can still become a better and happier person without the one you hurt in your life, & that while it can be really hard it can also be a good thing to leave a relationship, even if it’s one that once meant a lot to you. 

  But in all honestly, from my own perspective this kind of pairing is starting to read far less like enemies to lovers and far more like a horrible fantasy where you can pull whatever shit you want, even on the people you "love," & never be held accountable for your terrible behavior or even have to consider that maybe you were in the wrong. It's another facet that makes me larf every time I see people insist that fandom is an inherently "transformative" or "progressive" form of storytelling like friends you are literally just taking status quo toxic monogamy & rebranding it as somehow beneficial & romantic (X_X).

But as to anon’s last frustration, it is hard to know what is the appropriate response with this kind of thing...like for my own part I’m keeping my frustrations to my blog & now increasingly to posts that you would have to click on the “read more” button to see what I have to say, but I totally get the hesitation to give even a mild critique to big names in a fandom. Like I've now seen it happen repeatedly where someone who has a big name in a fandom will make something that's kind of shitty for one reason or another, someone will message them with some version of "hey, that's kind of shitty, you shouldn't do that," and the typical response is either to blatantly ignore the issue completely, or more popularly to make a giant crying circus that seems deliberately geared towards stoking emotions on both sides of the, for example, fiction does/doesn't affect reality issue so that something that didn't even have to be that big a deal gets blown out of all proportion, with the big name often framing what often started out as a very mild critique into a long crying jag about how the initial response to their kind of shitty thing was so mean/cruel and they're just a poor innocent & that YOU'RE the true racist/sexist/bigot etc. if you don't agree with their opinion. It must of course be noted that there have also been numerous instances of people taking it too far the other way & sending not just big names but smaller creators literal deaths threats over stuff like innocuous ships which like holy hell bells people that’s a horrible thing to do. But for the big names at least, the end result of all this fighting is usually that once the dust has settled they have more attention/fame/money/power in the fandom than before, and with anyone who might have a problem with their stuff feeling afraid to voice their opinion lest they be swarmed by that person's fans. In that way fandom does often seem to increasingly be geared towards presenting an “official” fandom perspective about various facets of a piece of media instead of allowing for a multitude of interpretations, and with criticism, no matter its shape or form or how genuinely warranted it may be, being hounded out of existence. I feel like a lot of this could be made less bad if there wasn’t this constant assumption & even drive to think that a different interpretation of or criticism of your favorite work of fiction or your fanwork isn’t a direct claim that you are a thoroughly loathsome individual (& maybe also if people cultivated an enjoyment of learning things about important works from a culture outside their own, even if what you learn clashes with your own initial understandings), but I guess we’ll see if that ever happens. 

So these are my general thinks about the Six Eared Macaque’s current fandom meow meow status & some of my bigger gripes with fandom tendencies as a whole. I stand by my idea that the most interesting & beneficial route for Macaque moving forward would be a kind of “redemption without forgiveness from the ones you hurt” arc--as I think was done pretty excellently with the character Grace in Infinity Train--and if for no other reason than gosh dern this monkey really needs to cultivate some sort of identity beyond his “Sun Wukong but worse” persona. 

[rosesastrology]

THE MOON SIGNS

In astrology, your moon sign represents your emotional nature, habits, reactions, wants and needs. The way your moon sign manifests will differ because of the house it's in and any applying aspects to the moon. If you don't relate to the description, that can be why. The whole chart should be taken into account, nonetheless if listed things I’ve seen commonly represented by these Moon signs!

Click here for part 2 (Libra - Pisces)

— By @rosesastrology on Tumblr.

Aries Moon

Very emotional, but may choose to show another exterior (Sun/rising).

Usually grows more mature as time passes, but keeps their intense emotions and occasional childlike energy. They often want to do things on their own, without help. Even when they're growing up, they're quite independent.

Anger is explosive but often short-lived, although they can be the type to want revenge and hold a grudge- the actual anger doesn't last long. It comes up in waves. They can be quite nasty during that short time though, often saying things they don't actually mean just because they're in the heat of the moment.

They have waves of sudden inspiration and deep passion, but also of nostalgia and deep sadness. Their mood can change quite quickly.

Often, these people will be inclined to do some sort of physical activity because they want to see the best version of themselves and vent those intense emotions. This can also manifest in a fast-paced, busy lifestyle or just a brisk walking pace.

Their careers are often a form of self-expression.

They tend to go with whatever feels right in the moment, which can make them quite impulsive.

Their humour is quite childlike. They also tend to get embarrassed quickly (but they'll say embarrassing things all the same).

Tend to start working at a young age, or do something else that you’d usually expect from an older person.

They have a big sense of pride and ego, which can make it almost impossible for them to ask for help. The way to comfort them is often just by listening to them. Talking is not needed, unless you're reflecting back what they said. They enjoy feeling heard. They don't want you to make it better, they want to be heard.

They want to be recognized and acknowledged. They enjoy helping, even if it's just for them to feel better. They stand up for themselves, they will defend their emotions. They refuse to get crushed. In the same sense, this will make them help the underdogs.

Often, they have a sense of empathy but only if the mood is apparent. They can become very ticked off or confused by things like passive aggression. It can be difficult for them to put themselves in someone else's shoes, unless the other person reminds them of it. Then they will be more than glad to help. Direct communication and reflection books the most results with them.

They have a tendency to only help if you ask them directly.

They're quick to jump into things and tend to have strong opinions (feelings) even if they don't show them outwardly. Most do show them outwardly and can seem temperamental.

They tend not to have a filter and can seem quite savage, often immediately saying what's on their mind (whether good or bad). This is not to say that they can't control themselves, though.

Tend to feel impatient.

Are actually very undiplomatic.

They go through fire for those they're close to, and won't hesitate to sacrifice themselves. They tend to want to be someone's saviour or hero. This can come forward in their career, too.

They always want to keep moving. They want to make progress and continue. This is why letting go is often not the easiest for them, especially if they have a prevalence of air and earth in their natal chart.

Later in their life, they can be very autonomous and great leaders.

They can almost seem to be drunk on their own self and pride but in reality they’re just confident.

Thoughts tend to be superficial, thinking about practicalities or beauty unless other topics are stimulated.

Can be insecure, especially early in life.

Good at performing. Often their talents lie here.

They don’t necessarily struggle with letting go, but with loss itself.

They’re do-ers.

Persistent to reach goals. Very motivated.

Taurus Moon

Often, these people are artistic or at least have an appreciation for the arts.

They often enjoy cooking, if not they will enjoy eating. They have a very peculiar taste and opinion about how food should be. Often it's not too complex, and they tend to order the same thing at restaurants. They enjoy those types of routines, even if they like variety in their daily life.

They can come across as soft-spoken, sheltered people who enjoy staying in.

They tend to fixate on the past, or at least do a lot of reflection. Reflecting is their source of motivation.

Sacrifice breaks them apart. It's one of the things that will truly, truly touch them.

They just have a general sense of maturity and kindness, even if they have a childlike humour (depending on their placements), they will always have a sense of reliability and resilience.

They always strive for greater heights and can be hard on their past self, often linking their worth to their skill.

It's hard for them to shake off their emotions.

Not as materialistic as everyone makes them seem. Most Taurus Moons I know are actually the crash and burn type of people and have no attachment to their materials. Comfort goes above anything for them, they don't need much- they just need the right things. They tend to have strong opinions about that.

They always seek to understand their partners, even if it's in a situation where they didn't do anything wrong.

Can seem distant or hard to reach.

They're very sentimental and nostalgic.

Tend to have a pleasant voice.

They can have a very hard time letting things, people or experiences go.

They're very hard to convince.

They have a lot of emotional strength and resilience. They're always growth-orientated.

Escapism can be an issue because of their emotional need for comfort. However, this tends to lessen eventually.

They have a great love for nature. Animals, plants, space, people- they love all these things. They are fascinated by things that are bigger than them, the whole picture. That's why nature and space fit so well with them.

They tend to be mature and laid-back in relationships- some will find this boring but it actually gives a sense of home and comfort that you won't find anywhere else. Compromise is key.

They tend to believe that humanity as a whole can improve. They want to make the world a better place in a tangible way. This is why they're the type to donate to direct charities- they're generous and love seeing a form of tangible improvement. Tangible good.

Extremely loyal.

Direct in communication, often they talk about their past. Past experiences and nostalgia stand central in their emotions. They focus on growth.

If someone says they can’t do something, they will go out of their way to do it just to prove the other person wrong.

Self-sufficient. Good at handling criticism.

They can actually be quite moody.

They often talk about their past.

Grounded but they tend to want to know reasons. This includes reasons for their feelings.

Gemini Moon

Emotions and actions are rationalized.

They think before they talk (although they can snap).

They can be more unruly with their emotion when they're young, as well as when they're very stressed or feel as though their conclusions contradict one another.

Their intelligence is admiring, even when it's not traditional.

Tend to be apolitical because they see it as a promotion show rather than an exchange of ideas.

They find education/their work very important and prioritize this above their health.

They often follow traditions when it comes to the educational path, but tend to be more extravagant when it comes to creativity and self-expression.

They often enjoy reading one way or another, whether it's literature, poetry or manga or visual novels doesn't matter.

Very communication-orientated.

They tend to know a lot of psychological facts and tricks, which they use for self-betterment but also on others.

Confidence comes and goes as it pleases.

Doesn't do well with contradictions, especially if it's a contradiction about their own issues. They need reasons and conclusions to fix the issue, even if it's about emotions. This is both a blessing- they are focused on fixing the issue to grow, and a curse- they rarely ever go with the flow or go with what they truly desire.

Strong opinions that they love to discuss. They're not necessarily the type to start the discussion, but they will engage.

They’re extremely curious about a wide variety of topics.

Everything is based on their logic, so if it's faulty they feel like a failure.

Tend to be uncomfortable with risks and change, although they enjoy variety.

They're planners, they're generally not spontaneous.

They have a lot of different sides that they show to different people, it's like their personality has archetypes- but it's still all them.

They tend to know a lot of random facts.

Often enjoy mental stimuli in the form of media, movies, videos, video games, reading, studying, etc.

Quick-witted yet scatter-brained, they tend to confuse themselves.

Not the most organized people, even though they're planners, it doesn't directly correlate to their surroundings.

If they can't find a viable solution they can end up feeling as though they're crazy.

Inventive although they'd never call themselves that.

Can be the tough love type of people, which doesn't work well with everyone.

Because they're so good at analysing and articulating their emotions, they give good advice.

Flighty.

Will close themselves off if they're hurt.

Has a need to find comfort within their daily commute, whether that's through family, friends or a cafe doesn't matter.

They are connected to the sky- the intelligent yet structured patterns of life give them their smarts. Their intelligence is practical and physical, whereas Sagittarius' intelligence is surrounded around the higher conscience, Gemini revolves around earthly concepts.

The house where the Moon resides often shows what the individual struggles with but will eventually grow immensely through.

They tend to understand themselves better if they write down, or say their conclusions- even if they are very obvious.

They don't want to be controlled by their emotions, but it doesn't mean they don't honour them.

They tend to analyse everyone and enjoy being able to openly talk to someone about that. There is an inherent need to understand everything.

Sensitivity for the abstract.

Defensive over their opinions.

It's hard for them to just feel emotions and be in the moment or go with the flow.

Cancer Moon

Actually very secretive about their emotions, especially towards strangers and people they're not close with.

Changes their personality to fit with the people around them, even if that mans compensating low confidence for seemingly high confidence. Although they do this, they don’t see those friends as true friends, they know it’s fake and see through that.

Will act nice if they want something from you, like buying something for you or straight-up begging.

Family-orientated even if they don’t seem like it. Family means a lot to them. If their home is unstable they’ll be more likely to stay away from their homes, trying to find love and company elsewhere. Nonetheless, the situations hurt them deeply on the inside.

Can be quite moody.

They have a very nurturing and caring side but they won’t show it if they don’t have a connection, in fact they can seem very detached to strangers.

This supposed detachment is solely because they seek to protect themselves.

If they’re not convinced about your intentions or can’t gauge you, they’ll put up a front or wall. This can lead them to ignore people, even if they actually like them. Another reason is because they don’t want to disrupt someone’s life with.. their presence or the depth of their emotions.

They can play push and pull, like how the moon pulls on the ocean.

They go with the flow and the moment which is one of their best skills.

They believe what they believe, they trust their feelings and intuition. This makes it easier for them to understand things on a deeper level, rather than a superficial one. They can persevere very well through hardships because of this too.

They have great memory.

Tend to be very

They apologise for everything.

Tendency towards introversion, they actually prefer quieter places but when they’re younger this is not always apparent because they want to fit in.

Criticism tends to hurt them because they feel like they know best, criticism seems to devalue them in their eyes.

They don’t have a lot of true friends often. Even those who are very popular only see few of their friends as true friends they can count on.

They get antsy when they have to open up because they feel so deeply, they’re often misunderstood.

They’re very responsive to their environment.

Very proctective and defensive (on guard) about their emotions. You may notice they’re upset but they won’t vent. They’re emotionally quite mysterious (outwardly).

If they don’t like you or something you said, you will notice it.

Deep down they’re very emotional.

They often become more family-orientated after having children themselves.

They’re not weak, whatsoever. Mentally, they’re some of the strongest people I know.

They use their emotional resilience to their advantage.

Need a lot of validation and reassurance to truly feel self-sufficient.

Their anger is like a wave and it lasts longer than you’d expect it to. It takes a lot to push them past their limit, but watch out if you do.

Sensitive to outward stimuli such as bright lights or bright noises.

Often attracted to water or the sea in some way.

Can become very selfish when they’re in a bad mental space.

In time, they find their true emotions to be deep and more human than most, in a way. They can deal with these emotions, which is what makes them so resilient.

Can actually accept and feel their feelings without having to understand them which is very admirable. They can just be and feel.

They feel everything on a deeper level, which is why they can also manifest deep happiness into their life.

Leo Moon

They’re very creative and tend to be talented at many things.

Often, they’re good at acting or doing impressions.

Performing is one of their vocal points, whether it’s through music, acting, sports, or their individual talent doesn’t matter.

They can be very insecure and feel as though they don’t matter, aren’t good enough, aren’t pretty enough, etc. In fact, superficial (physical) inscecurity is a real issue with them.

They’ll only be outward (performing, being in the spotlight) when they’re confident. If they’re insecure, it’ll be quite the opposite. They’ll still enjoy attention, but in lesser doses and often with less people.

They’re very empathetic.

They’re generous, giving to others makes them feel better as well (whereas Taurus moons do it to leave something good behind that’s tangible).

Enjoy sharing their forms of self-expression with others.

They can be extremely motivated and persistent to achieve their goals. “Someone has to do it, so why not you?” because of this attitude, they can achieve great things.

Very endearing because they’re so childlike, they’re just so lovable yet bratty.

Validation makes them thrive harder and insults tend to wear them down. They often expect validation, and forget to give it back at times but not out of malicious intent- just out of cluelessness.

Can be a bit dramatic and vain.

They’ll throw a tantrum and then pout and honestly you can’t deny their apologies.

Have an aura of warmth and genuineness. Their warmth just spreads happiness and it’s magical.

Bad at handling criticism, even if it’s constructive it still tends to hurt their feelings. It makes them feel like they’re failures, often because they take things very personally.

Sensitive.

Can be passive-aggressive but won’t admit it.

Can be arrogant but in a way it’s endearing because they’re so forgiving and generous.

Enjoys looking nice physically.

Often, they’re hopeless romantics.

Hard to stay mad at because they’re very charming.

Can be very cruel when they’re angry.

They feel very powerful a lot, you’ll hear them say “How dare you?!” quite a bit.

Doesn’t and cannot hold back if something pisses them off. Very feisty.

Often they have a lot of friends despite their insecurities.

Very energetic and passionate.

They’re like an adult child. They carry all that childlike charm and wit with them. They’re so endearing and kind, yet just as sensitive. This is not to mean that they can’t be mature and serious, because they can and if you treat them like a child then they’ll likely say you’re infantializing them.

The unfortunate sides of the ego can take over when they’re upset. They tend to be straightforward, yet they want to people-please as well. When their ego takes over, they can be annoyed very easily.

They’re impatient for results, better things, people, etc. Practicing patience can help calm their ego.

Rich imagination.

They tend to get annoyed easily, but with the right people they’re annoyed very rarely.

They get especially angry if they feel the action was personal and purposeful.

Virgo Moon

High standards, especially when it comes to themselves.

Extremely sceptical of everything and everyone. They can have big trust issues.

Sensitive to outward stimuli such as people’s energies.

Destructive perfectionism and anxiety is common here.

They’re not emotionless but it’s very difficult for them to express emotions outwardly because they can’t understand them. Since they can’t understand it, it’s difficult for them to articulate those emotions without getting stuck. As such, they tend to repress their true emotions and sometimes motives.

Pets and kids tend to love them.

They’re extremely attentive to every flaw, regardless of if it’s truly a flaw or not.

A big pro of Virgo Moons is their power to pick up on any flaw or difficulty and change it or themselves. As such, they can work on themselves more easily. They’re always changing, growing and striving for the best version of themselves. That’s the true power of Virgo Moons.

They’re very critical, and judge themselves a lot.

Because they’re so analytical, they can pick up on cues, signs and little things other people won’t notice. This serves them greatly in their quest to be useful.

They want to serve or at least help others in one way or another because it makes them feel useful and fulfilled. Even if they’re leaders or performers, in their head they’re working for the purpose or future of someone else. If they’re bosses, they’ll still feel as though they’re working for their employees or family. Performers with this placement tend to feel as though they work for their fans.

They’re intelligent and seek intellectual stimulation through material things like fitness, health and work.

They live from day-to-day, hence why it’s important for them to feel useful in their work.

They naturally give of a reclusive energy. This is partly because they have a tendency to feel that they are better than someone else because they did something better or in a neater matter.

They’re generally mature at a young age and were forced to go and grow through many difficulties.

They feel like they have to control their emotions, or at least something or someone. Whether it’s health, a relationship, education or something else.

It’s hard for them to let loose completely, unless they have a fire sun sign.

Extremely dependable in crises.

They have a very dry, sarcastic and dark sense of humour that doesn’t work with everyone. They can overcompensate humour to feel more liked.

They’re always focused on their health and weight.

Actually very neat and generally organised.

Can be very on guard about their emotions.

Rather than rational, I’d describe them as reasonable. There’s a reason behind all their actions, and they seek reason behind actions of others.

They make boundaries for themselves, but at the same time they have a tendency to limit themselves.

They seek to always be useful and needed; to be auto-sufficient.

They seek for functionality and practical efficiency.

Methodical.

Have very soft skin.

They follow routines and systems as well as having a tendency to follow routine, they tend not to believe or follow the “impossible”.

They let their skill and work do the talking, whereas Gemini Moons tend to talk a lot about their skills and intellect.

Incredibly self-aware.

They don’t want to make their internal struggle seem apparent on the outside. They express their emotions in private, and seek to control them for the sake of their image.

They don’t want to repress their emotions but at the same time they don’t want to make it a big deal. They want remain “strong” and “under control” because otherwise they feel vulnerable, which makes them uncomfortable.

They spend a lot of time analysing other people’s emotions.

They often spiral into self-criticism because they find their emotions irrational.

Sensitive to scents and outward stimuli.

They make to-do lists when they’re stressed.

They often feel as though their emotions are a burden to others.

They feel distressed and lost when they can’t find the words to express themselves or their emotions.

Even though they put on a smile, they often seem like an open book aside from their anxieties or sadness.

It takes long for them to open up and they feel stressed when pushed, it works best to wait for them instead.

They crave emotional stability from others.

They always feel the need to be productive and learn new information.

Quite conservative in how they come across.

They often just think about their emotions.

[fa-by]

hi F! Please do an analysis on Lauren’s new song While I’m Alive! She said on her instagram that it was directed to “someone” at first 👀👀

Hi to you too, dear Anon 👋🏼😄 and for sure. No problem, in fact, I'm sorry for the delay 😅

So. While I'm Alive is part of the Femme it Forward's all-female album called Big Femme Energy, Vol. 1. Laur wrote it long before she was part of this project, and yes, she said she wrote it with a person in mind by turning a vent into art because tired of the way she was/is treated:

This person, in my opinion, is 100% a shark. And this also responds to another ask I've recently received:

Hey to you, dear Anon 👋🏼😄 Yep, Laur wrote it for someone among the higher ups and therefore it concerns her career in particular, but she also applies it to other situations in her life in general.

Now let's move on to the interpretation.

Verse 1:

“Don't say I'm too loud when I cry out what I've held inside

I wanna know why they tried to take me and bury me alive”

The music industry is dominated by men. Gender inequality, sexism, and ageism reign supreme. No matter how much harder they have to work in order to succeed, women are anyway either sidelined, or supervised by men. Why? Because there’s a huge disparity between men and women, especially due to the way the public perceives their success and power. For example.

A man is praised for performing on stage with just the guitar. A woman who does the same, however, not only is she criticized for being too lazy and boring for not having made the performance more lively with a choreography, but she’s also criticized for what she was wearing. Same woman who gets criticized when she instead performs with a choreography because she wasn’t good enough. A woman who can’t be a drummer because it’s a thing for men, and if she persists in wanting to play, it’s not because it’s her passion and she’s pursuing her dream, no; it’s because she wants attention 🙄. A woman who can’t have a good idea about a song because, what can she understand about music, right? 😒

Unfortunately, it’s all a double standard. Women work harder than men and they then get questioned whether their success is deserved. One way or another, women are constantly being torn apart. Reason why Laur begins the verse by already letting us understand how put down she is by the sharks, followed by a question that actually doesn’t represent a real request for information, but that implies a predetermined answer.

“'Cause who am I to think that I have a right?

Or decide to know what I need, right?”

She's sarcastic of course. Since they've always told her what to do, how to act, and how to feel, here she's including a couple of examples among the thousand and more things they always have said and say to her. Because who better than her knows what's best for her? The answer is her. Especially when these orders, because they're orders, are imposed on her to make money with her career and not for her sake or because they care about her as a person.

“It's in the way, I talk and I walk away

From what you made me”

By ‘what you made me’, she refers to the way she was before. The person who was forced to accept everything she was told to do and therefore she couldn’t be herself. The person they made her become, and she didn’t like that person. Now she no longer wants to ‘submit herself’ and accept everything just for money and fame as she did in the past because she was legally obliged and not to do so. She did it many times especially when she was still in the group, but unlike in the past, she luckily no longer has the same kind of obligations. So if she doesn’t want to do something now, she simply doesn’t. She says no to what she doesn’t accept and walks away from that (I talk and I walk away) by not caring if she doesn’t have the same success as before because she prefers not to have that kind of success anymore but to remain herself, rather than have it and be just a product (what you made me); a different person from who she really is.

Verse 2:

“And I know this is all too familiar

Feel the motive behind all that fake love”

In Olivia Rodrigo’s voice 🎤: 🎵 Did you get deja vu, Laur? 🎶 No, but all joking aside. By ‘I know this is all too familiar’, she means what she has already experienced in the past and which she has once again found herself in front of. Once out of both Epic/Syco and Maverick, she believed she would’ve be dealing with better people, but it wasn’t like that. She realized that those kinds of people are everywhere because it’s the music industry that’s like that. The problem isn’t the single label or the single management team, it’s the entire industry. The problem isn’t the surrounding, but the people who are in it. Not all of them luckily, but most of them unfortunately.

By ‘Feel the motive behind all that fake love’, on the other hand, she describes precisely that kind of people. The fake ones who first treat you well because they want something from you, and then show themselves for who they really are when they don’t get it and try to hinder you, punish you, destroy you, and ‘bury me alive’ (verse 1) because of it.

So. Although I said it playfully at first, these two sentences go perfectly well together to describe the sense of deja vu that Laur felt.

 

*Small note* In the next three sentences of the verse, I will use these ‘---’ to complete her sentences as if I were Lauren to give you my interpretation. I’ll then continue as I always have. Oh and, she’s talking about her music here.

 

“I can’t take all these unsolicited opinions --- Nope, not anymore. I don't want them. Thanks, but no thanks.

Go ahead and be the scared ones --- with someone else who’s ready to tell you yes to everything and who doesn’t have a vision on how they want their own songs. Someone else who has no problem being a marketable product/puppet.

Either way, I’ll get it done” --- with other producers, songwriters, collaborators, etc., of my choice.

 

“I’ve been told I’m too much

Too proud, too cruel

Too wild, difficult to be around”

Let’s also add too confident, too sincere, and too honest from the people who mocked her at school before she became famous, shall we? Or maybe too fat, too arrogant, too full of herself, too whore, and all the other things said by the haters over the years? 😒😒😒🙄🙄🙄

I was being sarcastic of course, guys. I mean, can our girl ever have a break?

“With too much to say

Never in the right way

So, what’s the right way?”

Rhetorical question here because the right way is exactly the way she is. She has no intention of behaving in the ‘right way’ they want because it would mean not being authentic and automatically it would no longer be the right way because she would be fake.

Chorus:

“If I can’t be me

Who do you want me to be? (Who do you want me to be?)”

I love, love, love, love this. For real. It’s so powerful. And it doesn’t surprise me that this part along with the rest of the chorus is repeated four times, because it’s the most important part and it encloses the whole song perfectly.

“‘Cause if you can’t see beyond your gaze”

Behind their ideas to be the perfect product without looking at the person and their feelings.

“You don’t phase me and I don’t trust you anyway

‘Cause runnin’ through life, I figured out time

Don’t wait for no one”

After all these years and precisely because of what she’s been through, she realized she can’t wait for them to see it the same way she does or for someone to ‘save her’. She prefers to ‘save herself’. Therefore, she will continue to be wary, not to trust, and above all, to remain authentic as she says here:

“So while I’m alive, I’ma just be me (I’ma just be me)

Whoever that ends up being”

And that's it, dear Anon 😉 This song is dedicated to one particular asshole who gave her the idea, but mostly, it's dedicated to all those assholes who tried to tell her what kind of music she should have made, how she should have behaved, and how she should have felt. She decides for her, and she doesn’t care if she doesn’t have the same success anymore. Just like she doesn’t care about all the rest like the expectations and superficial perceptions they have of her that are completely wrong.

I hope you enjoyed it, and I wish both of you Anons and everyone else reading this, a beautiful day ❤🥰🤗