#which i have a lot of
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Guys! I did it! It's been so many days, but here we are!
A mannequin that is specifically Helbram!
From now on, all the clothes I design for Helbram will be on this :)
#seven deadly sins#nanatsu no taizai#7ds#nnt#7ds helbram#nnt helbram#7ds fairy#nnt fairy#mannequin#dont know when the next helbram outfit will be#gotta finish my pride design#...hopefully BEFORE the month's end#then I just came up with a new outfit for Maranwe tonight so thats a must#she's been goin through it#translation: *I've* been goin though it#and a new outfit is a sign of healing :)#this is how I process my identity issues...#which I have a lot of
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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David Tennant for Prime Minister, please.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/cabd9b626db1ce58571cd21cb6c658db/3d3c58b1f43d848b-85/s540x810/4e5c8be0f348d3867c58caf84bb0f6d445a80707.jpg)
edit- Since this is getting so much attention, edited to include descriptions of screenshots.
This woman has lost her fucking mind.
Jo, are you okay?
#Fuck your Rowling#Fuck terfs#David Tennant#Fuck Harry Potter#And everyone who watches Rowling’s new Harry Potter show#little whinging fuckers#gender taliban?#have you completely lost your mind JKR#maybe just stop being a little whinging fucker JKR#if he's smart he would never want this job because it's a horrible one but we'd be so much better off with a sane person in charge#But seriously Rowling are you okay?#does she look tired to you?#well I guess this has broken containment#He didn’t actually say you’re name JKR#he just called out transphobes and you assumed he was talking about you#which says you know exactly what you are and identify as a transphobe#says a lot#described
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having good & true friends will literally save and protect you in a million unfathomable ways. like okay we have written so many times about lovers. but the way a platonic friend laughs and cries with you. the way they hold your hand at 14 years old and at 34. the way they keep a little silver tie to you, touching base over and over and over. how you can go years without talking, only to re-meet and discover: oh shit! you're still cool!
there are people who have been in my life for more than half of it, and i have loved every version of them. do you know how fucking beautiful that is. yeah love will save the world. but the way friends love you is gonna save the you.
#and before one of u is like '' i have no friends :(" i used to be there too actually#abusive partner cut me off from ALL of 'em. i didn't think i was lovable#it made me EXCEPTIONALLY shy. i still am actually!!!!#i just ... started saying ''yes.''#i would take pictures of flyers in my library and go to whatever events they had#i started taking community classes#if someone mentioned like ''i am gonna start x group'' i actually took a deep breath#and approached them to be like . okay i want in.#i started making the first move with new people - a small compliment#a smile or a little joke. just to share the space with them.#i have MASSIVE social anxiety. bad parent and bad relationship will do that to ya.#but i just... kept going. and going. and going. to each of these little things. and then...#like. .... idk i just am very blessed. i have a STUPID number of friends#a lot of which i reconnected with. bc it turns out love is never wasted. adult life just.#like. gets in the way. but also... i loved u as a weird little kid. i love u now as a weird big adult.#i promise i PROMISE ur friends are out there. u just have 2 find them. and btw#i didn't make friends with everyone. but i did get a lot of people to smile or laugh.#aint that something.#this process took me something like 2 years. it was HARD!!!!!!!!!!#i love u!!! hard things are often worth it!!!
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don't think I'm not still obsessing over 7-12
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 12 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 12 spoilers#sorry it's even scribblier than usual :') hopefully my chickenscratch is legible#anyway come here and join me in the corner where we go to be embarrassing about anime characters#just. between riddle and trey's dreams i've been thinking a lot about how#trey knew this kid for like two months when he was nine and then never really got over him or how their friendship ended#which. honestly. understandable given the circumstances#and then when they finally met again riddle acted like they'd never met before and neither he nor trey ever intended trey to be his vice#but every time riddle talks about his childhood post-incident it's basically#'oh yeah i constantly thought about trey and che'nya and fantasized about still being friends with them! this is fine and normal'#(there's a bit in one of his birthday cards where he talks about crossword puzzles and shit man that one got me)#idk. i can't put this into words very well#just...the implications that riddle was actively resisting trey's friendship#(presumably because it ended SUPER badly last time and he's learned that if he shows he wants something it gets taken away from him)#and trey had to work REALLY hard to just to get to the point they were at by the time canon starts#that was progress somehow#y'all can call him boring all you want but trey's defining feature really is that he keeps being like#'everything's fine :) this isn't a big deal :) i don't care that much'#(trey on the inside: THIS IS THE BIGGEST DEAL THAT I CARE SO MUCH ABOUT AND I WILL NEVER LET IT GO)#anyway i continue to be absolutely murdered by the timing of riddlepunzel directly after this#riddle's line about not wanting to keep standing in front of a door that's never going to open...#hey. hey silly gacha game about anime disney boys.#you are not actually allowed to do this to me#oh shit oh damn i'm out of tags and i haven't even talked about cater yet. NO BUT I HAVE LOTS OF FEELINGS THERE TOO --#(i am crushed under a falling safe looney tunes style)
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crowley
#fem presenting crowley you're everything to me#as you might know I've been recovering from an injury these past few weeks which is why I couldn't draw as much as usual#been doing a bit better so I wanted to give drawing a try again#while my arm isn't back to normal yet it feels a LOT better than 2 weeks ago#which is a good sign#still gonan take things easy of course#good omens#good omens fanart#crowley#fem crowley#why was one of teh suggestions for that tag fem crocodile#I'll have to look that up#david tennant#crowley fanart#aziracrow#aziracrow fanart#my art#fanart#my good omens art#good omens 2
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#I thought maybe you'd enjoy this little string of rough thumbnails#it's part of a bigger comic scene that has been stuck in limbo forever#excuse my scribbly handwriting these are tiny and were never meant to be posted#own art#own characters#CanisAlbus#art#artists on tumblr#Machete#Vasco#anthro#sighthound#scenthound#dogs#canine#animals#comics#sketches#this is from the time they were studying in Venice#and I kind of imagined they could take a quick dip in the sea but there seems to have a lot fewer beaches than I thought#they could be on a trip to some neighboring area or maybe they rented a boat to Lido or something#the latter kind of dilutes the spontaneous element which was an important factor eh
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ok so i think that my favourite fantasy subgenre is The Inherent Tragedy Of Being Born Into Royalty. which mostly means that i like to read about gay princes but with some nuance
#ethically i am opposed to monarchies and empires. i think being born into a royal bloodline is inherently traumatising#which makes for the juiciest tastiest drama in stories obviously#either you become a bad ruler and people will suffer at your feet. or you become a good ruler and you no longer belong to yourself#how much will you sacrifice at the altar of your ideals?#It Compels Me. Narratively#also books like the goblin emperor have a big autism appeal in like. the court had a lot of nonsensical rules and you have to mask so much#apparently i am such a parody of myself that whenever im like. i have a drawing of my current blorbo#my friend immediately assumes it's a prince based on their vibes#IT'S NOT ALWAYS A PRINCE... SOMETIMES IT'S THE EMPEROR'S SECRETARY.... OR A DEMON WHO'S A KNIGHT.............. I CAN BE DIVERSE#anyway im currently reading the hands of the emperor AND a prince4prince web novel. that's the vibes rn
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Because i feel like i might be overestimating what the average is, i shall Conduct Research
This isn't about how many languages you speak, but how many youre able to count up to at least 10 in, since basic numbers are some of the first words you learn in a foreign language and sometimes you catch them without having studied the language at all
#shut up dave#cause like. i got 7 i think?#which isnt much ofc but i would assume its probably slightly above average#MY HYPOTHESIS. is that the average person on earth. can count up to 10 in at least 3 languages#hypothesis which i reached after a lot of narrowing down. so i have a feeling its correct this time
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if i had a nickel for every au spawned from twitter that i SWORE i was going to be normal about
#i'd have like. five. which isn't a lot but IT KEEPS HAPPENING#stranger things#platonic stobin#steddie#steve harrington#robin buckley#eddie munson#here we go again boys#i've had this floating in my head for a Minute and i was like#nah i'm not gonna do it#maybe i'll anonymously write a fic#but no we're mombin posting on main#i think on twt we agreed it's a 'what's the worst that could happen' situation#platonic co parents can be so so so personal#also i have One more stobin wip and then bg3 again i swear#when i have a baby i Will be putting my giant black wings on beforehand#they have to know what kind of family they're coming into#cw pregnancy
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moomin summer
#if i had a nickle for every time i drew moomin and ethel i would have three nickles#which isnt a lot but it could be more#art#doodle#ethel cain
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Whatever the result is, I will attempt to recreate it as a drawing!
#poll#I know some of you are curious to hear an update on my hell trip. Good news! I already have thumbnails for my day one comic journal.#A lot happened! There was a comically large block of cheese! I got lost in the woods at night!#But I digress. This post is about charcuterie. Which is apparently a high artform that people have strong opinions on.#I am genuinely curious to see how the results distribute. My hunch is that the board will be hilariously unbalanced#but I am willing to be surprised! Plus it is an opportunity to try drawing something outside of my zone of comfort.#Good luck to this board. I think...it will need it.
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Holiday Classics
Been thinking about Ford watching the 70s Animated Lord of the Rings Movies... (companion comic to this post!)
#the other two VHS tapes Fidd's is holding are Rankin-Bass' The Hobbit (1977) and Return of the King (1980)! The 70s animated pseudo-trilogy!#A lot of people pointed out on my other lotr 'crossover' post that Ford would have seen the 70s movies!#And i wont lie i entirely forgot they existed. But now i remember i have so many feelings on it okay. Ford my silly LOTR nerd#I dont think he would have seen Bashkis in theaters. far as I can tell it was a VERY limited (likely mostly CA) run in the middle of winter#but Rankin-Bass'? Aired on NBC & ABC. He absolutely woulda watched them or rented a VHS later. Which is why he's most excited by Bashki's#He's just such a nerd. I need him to nerd out. But also lowkey angst on how his single focus on bill/the portal lead#him to neglecting even the small things in life. Like knowing a VHS release of an adaptation of his favourite book series had come out#GF fanart#Gravity Falls#gravity falls comic#Fan art#fanart#fiddleford mcgucket#fiddleford hadron mcgucket#young fiddleford mcgucket#*holds two random VHS tapes in one hand to check Fidd's pose in the 2nd panel makes sense* Well thats mathamatically feasible!#young stanford pines#stanford pines#ford pines#Book of Bill#comic#artists on tumblr#my art#Grunkle ford#fiddauthor#cause Fidds is not talking about the movie there. Well okay he's talking about the portal but He COULD BE TALKING ABOUT- *I am dragged off*
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the old uncle who refuses to wear headphones on the train
#hatsune miku#vocaloid#piapro studio#doodle#this is supposed to be one of those cultural mikus but…#not only have so many people already done filipino miku; singapore is…a Special Place let’s say#to keep it simple: there are four different ‘main’ cultures which cannot all be encompassed into one miku#it’s a lot more complicated than that but suffice to say the only way i can show ‘filipino living in singapore’ is with two aspects#jollibee and aging populations
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i am a child.
i am forced into a dress. makeup is smeared onto my face. i kick and cry and beg, but they will not stop.
i am forced to pose in front of the camera with my thighs together and hope that the makeup hides my tearstains. i must be the perfect picture of femininity; innocent, untouched.
i already have a thousand hand prints on me.
'all men are evil rapists', i am told.
i think about my friends, who are men. the men who called me every day while i was in a psychiatric hospital. the men who walked me home when i was afraid. the men who protected and cared for me, without ever expecting my body in return.
it can't be the body that makes someone evil. it can't be the presence of a penis that makes someone evil. but it can't be the identity of 'man' that makes you evil, either.
i ponder the difference between the men who raped me and the men who protected me. i decide that it depends on who the person is inside, and not on their identity.
'sit down and shut up,' they spit at me. 'the men are talking. learn your place. don't speak over us.'
'you throw like a girl.'
'you run like a girl.'
'girls can't do this. they're not smart enough.'
'girls aren't strong enough to do this.'
over and over, such sentiments are tossed at me. i bite down my anger, because women aren't supposed to yell or get angry. if i get angry, that makes me a hysterical bitch.
'women are meant to be mothers,' i am told. they beat it into me that my worth lies not in my personhood, but in the womb between my hips. it makes me feel sick and violated, just like every sexual assault has.
i am groped. i am raped. i am assaulted.
it's my fault, i'm told. i'm a temptress. my body is a vile weapon, a weapon created to tempt men into sin, a weapon that makes me a subhuman toy.
i am treated like a toy. as i am molested during my childhood, i learn that i am a toy. the anatomy between my hips has marked me as public property. i am less than human.
they keep forcing me into dresses. they keep forcing me into makeup. no amount of protesting makes it end. i grow to loathe femininity and the violation that always seems to come with it.
i come out as a trans man at fifteen.
'can't you just be nonbinary?'
'can't you just be a tomboy?'
'i don't want you to regret this.'
'i don't want you to ruin your perfect body.'
'men are disgusting. why do you want to be one of them?'
'are you sure you don't just want to be a man because you were sexually assaulted?'
i continue to be a man. my parents intentionally delay my ability to go on testosterone. by the time i am able to go on testosterone, i have already finished puberty. my body is irreversibly feminine.
people throw food at me. they call me a faggot, a tranny, a dyke. they kick me and shove me to the ground. they cyberstalk me. they post pictures of me online so that they can mock me.
a girl says to me, 'you need to learn your place,' as she calls me a faggot over the internet. she kicks me when she sees me the next day.
my boyfriend when i am fifteen is a cis man who says he is pansexual. he dismisses me when i talk about being trans, because he uses he/they pronouns and 'understands it'.
he sexually assaults me repeatedly. i am in constant distress. my distress is used as proof that i am a snowflake hysterical tranny. i am a hysterical woman who only THINKS she's a man, and i need to be put in my place. trans 'men' are all hysterical and overreactive, and my behaviour is used as proof.
my boyfriend exclusively refers to me with they/them pronouns. i tell him to use he/him. he waves his hand, dismissing my words, and says, 'they're basically the same thing'.
he tells me that he wants children. i try to ignore the sick feeling in my gut.
he only uses he/him pronouns for me after we have broken up, when he is trying to paint me as abusive. i lose my entire friend group because of it.
people keep talking down to me. when i go on testosterone, cis men try to explain that it's toxic for me, using cis man bodybuilders as an example. i try to explain how that isn't the case. they insist that 'female bodies aren't built to handle testosterone'. i try to explain to them how hormones work, and they laugh and roll their eyes.
silly girl. stupid girl. she doesn't know what she's talking about.
people continue to make fun of trans men online. our music, our art, our interests, our fashion sense, our names. i cannot help but feel dejected. all i want is to be a man, and to fit in among everyone else, but even in doing so, i stand out as a target for mockery. misogyny is inescapable, even for men.
i am seventeen years old. my worst fear comes true. i am raped and forcibly impregnated, with the intention of forcing me to detransition.
that sense of violation is impossible to truly describe.
my reproductive system was designed to become pregnant. my body will do its best to become pregnant, no matter what i want. pregnancy is an inescapable function of my body, and it makes me feel trapped and sick.
the man who raped me has turned my own body into a weapon against me. even in my body, my own flesh and sinew, i am not safe.
i miscarry. i am in agony. my womb cramps and i try not to pass out.
i enter feminist spaces. i try to talk about my experiences with misogyny.
'sit down and shut up,' they spit at me. 'the women are talking. learn your place. don't speak over us.'
all trans men have male privilege, you see, without exception. by the mere act of wanting to become a man, i have become a traitor, and i am thrown to the cis men.
the cis men, who see me as a woman that they're finally allowed to abuse. finally, they can hurt and rape and impregnate a woman, because she's one of those snowflake trannies and she needs to be put in her place.
i bite down my anger, because trans men aren't supposed to yell or get angry. if i get angry, it's proof that i'm not a man, that i'm a hysterical bitch, and that i'm a dangerous snowflake tranny seeking to mutilate children.
the sentiment is bitterly familiar.
#anti transmasculinity#transandrophobia#transmisandry#< i have seen a lot of words going around to describe transmasc specific oppression#and i am not sure which one i am supposed to use#sorry
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spiraling
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#megumi fushiguro#fushiguro megumi#gojo satoru#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#the minute i realized how tg coded the composition n colours were i decided to turn it up to 11#i was racking my brain trying 2 figure out how to get the layered tissue paper look tht i talked abt ishida's cover art having#cycled through all my usual layer modes n nothing ws Quite right#until wouldnt u know it . divide n subtract!!!!! i NEVER use divide or subtract bc theyre impossible#but fr this??? its like they were made for it oh my god#it makes the greys look translucent n all my textures pop in a way that makes them appear splotchy n Bruised#which ws the whole point thts the Look god i am so PLEASED#when the layer modes tht notoriously get No love finally find their niche <33 peace and love <333#filing this away fr later i am going 2 have a lot of fun with this new information i think#im very happy w how the colours look n i dont think anything else wld have kept the right Mood#but i am always so >:/ when i have to use a palette tht forces me into giving megumi blue eyes#had to set aside th green eyed megu agenda fr the Aesthetic unfortunately#anyway i knew from the minute i saw it that i wanted to do smth involving the opening panel of 268#bc that panel is S tier#i figured tht if nothing came 2 me i wld just redraw it as-is bc it's alr so good but as i ws sketching i was like#u know what u havent done in a while? art tht looks like u r going Insane#art tht makes ur family ask whether everything is ok#so i once again tucked megumi's knees up 2 his chest and apologized insincerely to him fr making the third megumi angst piece in a row#:)
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