#which i disagree with soooo much

[dilfssi]

I want to be great or nothing

the greatest, billie eilish // symphonia ix (my wait is for you), grimes // oh no!, MARINA // american beauty, sam mendes

[readymades2002]

if i might bitch about work for a second: yesterday was hellishly bad despite being able to keep up with it and i found out that apparently our department made 4600 dollars yesterday which is making me angry beyond belieffffffff

[kaminohana]

i really feel like every song in the second trial of Milgram is better than their first trial counterparts

like, the music feels like it hits harder, the animation is fan-fucking-tastic, and there's all-around sooooo much more going on (at least imo)

dont get me wrong, i LOVE the first trial songs, but these i love MORE

[carakook]

Shut Up .・。.・゜✭・.

╔═*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*═╗

“If I fuck you, will you calm the fuck down and listen to me?”

🔞FOR MATURE AUDIENCES🔞

Pairing: Kim Namjoon x Reader

Synopsis: After taking a job as a co-writer, you quickly find that you and your “boss” just don’t get along. Constantly butting heads, disagreeing on things, and he isn’t even nice about it. He’s a fucking dick. He’s always criticizing you in embarrassing ways, but you’ve tried to be patient, ride it out. Over the short time you’ve worked here, the tension has built quickly, and it is clear both of you cannot stand each other. Unfortunately, today is the day you reach your limit after he humiliates you in front of several of your coworkers… and the “conflict resolution” is definitely something you did not expect.

Genre: Enemies to lovers (or hookup in this case), workplace affair.

Pairings: Boss/Writer!Namjoon x Co-writer!Reader

Word count: 7.5k+

Warnings: 18+, Heavy smut!! Hate sex, protected sex (wrap it up), rough sex, face fucking, light slapping (not in the face), a bit of spit play, face fucking, cussing, crying (sort of), heavy conflict, degradation, arguing, name calling, a bit of teasing, cum eating? (Sort of), dry humping, face humping, being slapped with dick (lightly), Let me know if I missed anything!

⚠Disclaimer⚠:This story does not in any way reflect the character of those who are mentioned, it is totally fiction and just for fun. Please don’t take it seriously.

A/N: Hiiii! This is my first one shot. I’ve actually had it in my drafts for a long time but never posted it, I decided to finish it recently and post it here. I hope you like it! I love writing, have soooo many drafted one shots/full on fanfics with each of the boys. A looot of them are with Jungkook, can’t help myself. He’s my lover… 😭 Anyway, if you guys end up liking this I’ll post more. Thank you so much for reading if you do!

╚═*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*═╝

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

There aren’t many things you regret in life. Because if you allow yourself to regret things, you overthink. Overthinking is never a good thing.

See, it wasn’t awful at first. But the moment you met Kim Namjoon, you could tell he had a problem with you. What? You didn’t know. You still don’t know. But he never bothered hiding it.

You powered through, because this was sort of like a dream job for you. You loved writing music, writing lyrics. It was hard to even find a job like this to begin with. So when you got the callback, you jumped at the chance. You were so excited to be working here, and you were familiar with Kim Namjoon. You thought his songs were beautiful, his writing style seemed similar to yours.

Boy, you were wrong.

Not even a week into working here he was heavily criticizing you. But again… you pushed through. Because you were new, he had a right to be picky. This was his studio, he was technically your boss… technically. So you tried to be patient and listen to his criticism.

Which didn’t last long. Because he was not subtle. Arguably, there is a difference between constructive criticism and being blatantly rude and picky. Namjoon was straight-up rude. And at times it was embarrassing.

Nothing you did seemed to satisfy him. Every single time you brainstormed with him and the team, he disagreed with you. Every time you proposed lyrics, he rejected your ideas. Every time you so as much opened your mouth, he had an issue with what you had to say.

You tried to be patient… you genuinely did. But you don’t like feeling disrespected or embarrassed. And you certainly don’t take shit from anyone. So the last two weeks you’ve both been bickering, and the tension is noticeable not only to you and Namjoon but to the entire damn team.

The worst part about it all? You are so fucking attracted to him. He makes your tummy swoop with butterflies. He smells good. He’s tall, his dimples are fucking adorable, and his body… god, he is to die for. The sexual tension is prominent.

If only he wasn’t such a dick.

Today pushed you to your limits. Never in your life have you been more embarrassed.

It all started with a song he was working on. He played the beat, and immediately you were inspired. You got excited. Your attitude was bright, and you immediately jotted the lyrics down on your paper when they came to mind. You seriously thought today would be the day he’d be proud. He would agree. You felt good about it.

Only for him to burst out laughing when he read the lyrics. That wasn’t even the worst part. It’s bad enough that he laughed at you in front of the entire team. But what he said next is what made you lose your shit.

“Oh- shit. You’re serious?”

He stared at you for a moment, taking in your very irritated expression. And then he fucking laughed again.

“Fuck, Y/N. I thought this was a joke. God, I wish it was a joke because it would be hilarious if it was. It sounds like a fucking kids-bop song. You can’t be serious.”

And that’s when all hell broke loose.

You went off on him. In front of everyone. For three minutes straight you cursed him out, waived your hands around, and made it clear how much you cannot stand him and how rude he has been. How humiliated you feel. You’ve always been praised for your writing, so why the fuck doesn’t he like it? You are fucking pissed.

Maybe it wasn’t a good idea to cuss your boss out in front of everyone… but at this point, you don’t care. If he gets you fired by the company, oh-fucking-well.

Namjoon stares at you for a moment once you’re done. Your chest is heaving, your cheeks are red, and your brows are furrowed angrily. Clearly, he didn’t expect your outburst. His nostrils are flared and his jaw is tense, it even does the little tick thing that drives you crazy. Fuck him for being so hot. Fuck him for being so damn hot and such a dick.

He raises a brow at you, tongue in cheek, making that angry face that would be incredibly attractive if it weren’t directed at you. He lets out an angry huff of air before speaking.

“Studio. Now.”

He points at his studio as he says this as if you’re too stupid to understand his words. This pisses you off even more.

“You’re not my fucking boss.”

He scoffs at you, briefly smiling at your bold choice of words. You infuriate him just as much as he infuriates you.

“Actually, Y/N, I am. Studio. Now.”

You know that technically, he is your boss. But you refuse to listen to him after how humiliated he made you feel. In front of everyone, how dare he speak to you this way? Regardless of his weird hate for you. Besides, he can’t fire you. He may be able to request it, but you know that he won’t. From what you’ve heard, It took forever to fill this position. He was picky when it came to hiring someone… which makes this more confusing. You can’t figure out what his issue is with you, especially when he is the one who helped pick you for the job. Regardless, you know that he doesn’t have the patience to do it again. He’s full of shit.

You stand your ground. You won’t back down this time. You’re tired of the disrespect.

“No, Namjoon. Whatever you want to say, you can say it here. You’ve already embarrassed me, so go ahead, do it some more. I’m sure you get off on it.”

No longer smiling, his gaze is dark. He’s pissed. Now he’s a bit embarrassed… that’s what he gets.

“I won’t ask again. You can march your ass upstairs, or I can carry you. Your choice.”

You say nothing, surely he wouldn’t do that. He’s bluffing. Regardless of how harsh he has been towards you, you know that he wouldn’t cross that line. You hope that he doesn’t. The last thing that you want is for him to touch you. Not because he makes you uncomfortable, but because you already have enough dirty thoughts about him. You hate him, yet he turns you on in a way you’ve never felt. Lust driven by pure hatred, it’s a dangerous thing.

But of course, you were wrong, and he never ceases to surprise you. Never underestimate Kim Namjoon.

You stay silent, secretly hoping that he will just back down and continue the brainstorming session. But is Kim Namjoon the type of man to back down? No. He never has been.

He strides over to you quickly, taking big steps in your direction, causing you to miss your chance to run.

He swiftly grabs your waist and hoists you over his shoulder, his fingers digging into your thighs. You don’t even have time to react before he starts carrying you upstairs to the studio. He has no trouble doing so either, carrying you as if you weigh nothing.

You come to your senses and swat at his back while you yell profanities at him, demanding that he put you down, threatening to report him, and telling him that he’ll be fired by morning if he doesn’t stop.

But you know that he won’t. This company would never side with you, no matter what Namjoon did. They relied on him. They didn’t rely on you. You were replaceable, even if it would be difficult. Namjoon is not replaceable.

“Resume the session. If you finish before we’re done, you’re free to go. This may take a while. Don’t interrupt us.”

Hurried nods are sent in his direction, no one dares protest him or intervene. Cowards.

He kicks the door open to the studio, entering with ease, making sure not to hit your head on the doorframe as he walks in. You wish he would have hit your head, knocked you out, hell even thrown you over the staircase. Anything to avoid this humiliation he has cursed you with. You almost wish you would’ve just kept your damn mouth shut.

But the damage is done now. No point in backing down.

He throws you roughly on the couch sitting opposite his desk and then closes the door, locking it before facing you.

You glare at him, chest heaving, heart beating out of your chest. You’re just as pissed as he is. Yet, you still find yourself clenching your thighs together, irritated at the fact that he turns you on so much. You shouldn’t be horny right now… yet you are. The way he squeezed your thighs… fuck. Fuck him. God, fuck him to hell. You hate him.

“What the fuck was that?” You nearly growl at him.

He stands in front of you, arms crossed, looking down on you as if you’re nothing more than a pesky roach that he wants to squash.

“I told you, you could walk, or I could carry you. You made your choice, clearly.”

Fuck him.

“Fuck you, Namjoon. This is ridiculous.”

He laughs. He laughs at you.

Fuck him.

“You are ridiculous, Y/N. Why are you even here, if you can’t take criticism?”

“Are you fucking kidding me? I can take criticism, constructive criticism, something that you are apparently incapable of giving. You’re so fucking mean to me and I’ve done NOTHING to you.”

“No, I-“

You cut him off, unable to control your mouth.

“And another thing, it’s only me that you speak to this way. I’ve yet to see you speak to anyone else the way that you do me. What is your issue with me, why do you hate me so much?”

“Maybe if you-“

You cut him off again, and his jaw does the tick thing. He’s getting angrier, but you do not give a fuck.

“No, this isn’t on me. I earned my spot here, I was hired for a reason, and everyone else respects me, why don’t you?”

“Because-“

Again.

Fuck him.

“There is no reason, you obviously have some sort of sick vendetta against me. You’re fucking insufferable!”

“Me? No, you-“

Again.

And he’s had enough.

“No, fuck you Namjoon, fuck you and this weird ass game you’re playing, you—“

He borderline growls before he pins you on the couch.

You don’t even have time to register what he’s doing, and if you did, you’d slap the shit out of him.

That’s what you tell yourself, anyway.

His lips crash into yours as he hovers over you, one knee perched in between your legs, while his other leg steadies him. He grabs your face with force, so rough that you swear he could break your jaw if he gripped you any harder. His other hand is on the back of the couch, steadying him the same and pinning you in place.

The kiss is no different. His lips assault yours, and he wastes no time in forcing his tongue into your mouth. He kisses you with vigor. A kiss unlike any you’ve ever experienced before. You’ve only ever been kissed like this in your dreams, the same dreams that wake you up in the middle of the night leaving you touch-starved. It’s fucking aggressive and rough.

And of course, you kiss him back. You don’t want to. Yet you do. You don’t want to give in to him. But you do. You can’t help it. As soon as he made his move, you were under his control. He has that way about him, he’s easily able to affect people. You were a different story. You always defied him, disagreed with him, challenged him. Yet, this is the way that he tames you, even if only for a minute. Shit. You’re weaker than you thought.

He nips your bottom lip before pulling back, your jaw still in his grip. His nostrils are flared and his breathing is rigid, as if he’s just as shocked as you are at his actions.

And he is. He has no idea why he just kissed you. He has no idea what came over him. He just wanted you to shut the fuck up, and he acted on impulse. And now he has a raging hard-on, which pisses him off even more. He doesn’t want to want you, in the same way that you don’t want to want him. But you both do.

He whispers, searching your face, studying your reaction.

“Do you ever just shut the fuck up and listen?”

You clear your throat, still trying to come down from the rush of the kiss, adrenaline running through your veins.

“I-“

“Do you know how fucking irritated you make me?”

Suddenly, you have no fight left in you. You feel intimidated. Fuck him.

“Then why-“

“Am I gonna have to kiss you every time you need to shut the fuck up?”

You blink at him, unable to respond. You have no idea what to do, or how to react, and are becoming distracted by the puddle seeping between your thighs.

You haven’t had sex in over a year. You haven’t been able to grow interest in someone enough to give them that piece of yourself again. Your last situation-ship left you simply sick of men. Sex wasn’t appealing enough to go through that again. But, of course, as if the universe is punishing you, Namjoon awakens your sex drive.

You nervously bite your lip and clench your thighs, not even realizing what you’re doing. You’re on the verge of tears, overwhelmed with anger and lust. And this doesn’t go unnoticed by Namjoon.

He looks down at your thighs, and you immediately unclench them. Your cheeks betray you by reddening, thanks to the smirk that very clearly gives away that he knows exactly what you’re feeling right now.

He keeps his eyes on your thighs for a moment before looking up at you. He smirks, raising a brow, giving you a crooked smile that tells you he knows your dirty little secret. Your jaw is still firmly in his grasp.

“Is that it? You’re sexually frustrated? Is that why you’re being such a bitch?”

You try to wriggle from his grasp, embarrassed, angry, horny. You’re starting to wish he would just fire you. Anything to save you the embarrassment of his knowing glare.

“Fuck you.”

He chuckles, bringing his face closer to yours, so close that you can feel his breath touch your lips.

“Yeah? Fuck me? If I fuck you, will you calm the fuck down and listen to me?”

You blink at him again and say nothing. You want to protest, tell him how gross he is, tell him how much you hate him, tell him that he’s the worst. Yet, his idea just makes you hornier. You’ve never had hate sex, and oh fuck, you’re sure that it would improve your mood, even some of the tension between you two.

But it pains you to even admit that. It’s humiliating. He has humiliated you enough.

He moves his hand to the back of your head, angling it upwards so that he has better access to your neck. He places his lips on your jaw, running his teeth up it, leading to the crook of your neck, keeping his lips on you as he speaks his next words.

He grabs your wrist with his other hand, leading it to his crotch, coaxing you to feel him. And he’s hard. So hard that you’re certain a button will break on his jeans. Fuck. He feels giant… You’re so fucked.

“Do you see what you do to me? Never in my life have I had anyone piss me off to the point of getting a fucking boner.”

You can’t help but whimper at his dirty words, but you make sure to bite your lip, preventing yourself from begging him to take you as you so desperately want to. You aren’t one to beg for anything. And you hate him even more for bringing you to that point.

“I’ve thought about fucking you so many times, Y/N. Fucking you to the point that you don’t even remember your own name, and my name is the only thing that you can scream. I just wanna fuck you until you shut the fuck up.”

“Please, just… do it then.”

Word vomit. You thought it but didn’t intend to say it. Yet, you said it. Of course, you did. You’re on the brink of cumming just from his filthy words.

He kisses your neck before speaking. And you can feel him smile as he does so.

Fuck him.

“Oh, Y/N, baby, hearing you beg makes it so tempting. I never thought you’d be the type, considering the amount of shit you talk.”

You croak out, suddenly feeling defensive, “I’m not. I don’t beg for shit.” You weakly push at his chest, even though you both know damn well you don’t want him to stop.

He laughs, pulling back to look at you, keeping his face close.

“Yet, here you are, begging for my cock like a desperate whore.”

You frown at him, feigning offense, when in reality his degradation is making you even more desperate. Why? You don’t know. You’ve never liked being degraded, in fact, nothing turns you off more than being called names… but hearing it come out of Namjoon's mouth? Fuck.

“I’m not a whore.” You whisper.

He tilts his head at you, amused.

“Fucking obviously, you’re acting like you’ve never been touched before. Are you this needy with other men?”

“There are no other men.”

He studies you for a moment, carefully calculating his next move. The way that he looks at you makes you feel insecure, as if he’s a judge on one of those cooking shows, trying to figure out whether he likes the taste of you or not. You have the urge to push him away and take off, his gaze is too goddamn intense.

He is too intense. Never met a man like him.

“Stop looking at me like that.” You mumble, looking away from him.

“Like what?” He asks, furrowing his brows. Amused.

“Like you think I’m the most vile thing on earth.”

He’s taken aback by your response, almost looking offended. Because that is the last thing he was thinking. If only you knew.

“Vile? Baby, I’m so hard for you right now that it hurts, do you know how hot you are when you’re pissed? Fucking annoying, but soooo hot.”

You squirm, your cheeks pinking again. You didn’t expect that. You expected him to laugh in your face and agree. He grunts as he takes in your facial expression. If only you knew what you truthfully do to him. He closes his eyes and scrunches his brows, taking a deep breath before he pulls away from you, leaving you considering getting on your damn knees and begging for him to touch you again.

He chuckles while shaking his head, eyes still closed as he speaks. As if he’s in pain from pulling away from you.

“Yeah, fuck, and you’re cute when you blush. This is fucked. I can’t stand you, yet you’re so fucking cute. What the fuck are you doing to me? Huh?”

Fuck. He’s making this hard. You’re so overwhelmed. So pissed, so horny, you wanna push him away and cuss him out some more, but also you’ve never wanted another man more in your life than you do him right now.

Both of you stare at each other silently for a moment. His jaw keeps doing the tick thing, and you squeeze your thighs tighter, rubbing them together to relieve some pressure. His eyes flick to them, and you don’t even bother hiding it this time. As humiliating as it is, his cock is hard and bulging out of his jeans. So you can’t find yourself caring too much at the moment.

What really makes his resolve waver is the way you’re looking at him, which you don’t even realize. Normally you look at him with such disdain, as if he’s the vile one. But right now? Your eyes are wide and glossy, your lip stuck between your teeth. You’re looking at him almost sweetly. The desperation in your gaze is impossible to hide.

He loses it completely.

“Ah, fuck it.” He declares before grabbing you by your hair again as he sits on the couch. He tugs you roughly into his lap and starts devouring your mouth again.

You let out a little huff of air as he does this, not quite used to the rough handling. But god, it’s fucking divine. You feel as if all of the anger you’ve held for him comes rushing out in the form of kisses and touches. He feels the same.

His hand leaves your hair and he grips your hips, roughly grinding his hard cock onto your pussy. Dry humping like fucking teenagers as you make out aggressively.

Your hands come to rest on his face, framing it as they tremble slightly from the overwhelming emotions. You don’t hold back this time either, licking into his mouth wantonly, letting out little grunts and mewls that make his cock strain and twitch inside of his jeans.

His hands leave your hips to grip your ass, and he fucking groans into your mouth. He slaps it once, testing. When you let out a whine, he slaps it much harder this time, making your body jerk slightly.

He laughs into your mouth and says breathily, “Fuck, you really are a whore aren’t you?”

You bite his lip hard when he says this. You hate it. You love it. You grind down harder onto his clothed cock. He reaches back up to grip your hair and tugs your head back, pulling on it harshly and pulling you away from his mouth.

He grins when he hears you whine at the loss of his lips. “You wanna fucking bite me, huh? Uh-uh, fuck no you don’t.”

He pushes you off of his lap and lets go of your hair, you look up at him with heavy-lidded eyes and confusion. Honestly, you already look fucked out and he’s barely done anything. You’re just touch-starved, so every little kiss and touch is fucking you up. You’re craving relief from both your sexual frustration and the building irritation he’s caused you over the last month.

Before you even realize what he’s about to do, he grabs your hair again, his grip much firmer this time. It actually kind of hurts… yet you don’t stop him. He pushes your face roughly into his clothed cock, and grinds onto your face as he spreads his legs wider on the couch.

Oh fuck.

He grunts as he starts nearly smothering you. When he feels a bit of your drool gets onto his crotch, he yanks your head back, he laughs again, “Bet your big fucking mouth is great at sucking cock. Should we find out?”

You just glare at him. Don’t wanna give him the satisfaction even though every single thing he has done so far has made you borderline cream your pants.

He clicks his tongue, “No? Don’t have anything to say now? Isn’t that funny…”

Fuck him.

He keeps his grip tight on your hair as he uses his other hand to fumble with his zipper and button. Once it’s undone, he whips his cock out. It hits the fabric of his rumpled shirt and is already dripping precum.

Holy. Fuck. His cock is huge. A good nine inches.

He yanks your head forward again, literally smearing your face all over it, humping your face again. His head falls back and he grunts at the feeling. Your skin is just so soft, and the way your makeup is already becoming fucked up is making him go crazy. He’s always loved sloppy sex. And you are fucking gorgeous like this, he thinks.

He grabs his cock with his free hand as he tilts your head back, starts slapping your mouth with it, your cheeks too. The precum starts stringing from your cheek to the tip of his cock, and you can see his pupils dilate even bigger, he almost looks like he’s about to lose control.

He says uncharacteristically softly, “If you want me to stop, pinch my thigh real hard, yeah?”

If you had even a single moment of free thought, you would’ve probably been thankful that he gave you an out. You know despite him being a huge piece of work, he’s not a bad guy. So the fact he’s setting boundaries in your favor, even in the heat of the moment, is comforting. He cares about your safety and comfort. It’s the bare minimum of course, but most men lack even that. It’s why you stopped having casual sex to begin with.

But you don’t have a moment to think because pushes your lips down onto his cock abruptly, your mouth opens on instinct and he shoves himself inside. Doesn’t even ease into it, he just straight up plows his cock inside of your mouth until your nose is pressed against his pelvis.

You cough, and gag, already drooling all over him. Fuck it’s hot. You’ve never been face fucked like this before, but you’re starting to think maybe you’ve been missing out on good sex if this is how good rough sex feels.

You can’t even imagine what his cock would feel like inside of you if it feels this good in your mouth.

When he sees tears start to form, he pulls your hair back, strings of spit and precum connecting from your mouth and onto the tip of his cock. Fuck, it felt so good feeling your throat constrict around his cock. His resolve is wavering heavily. But he’s trying to remain patient. He smirks at you, stroking his spit-covered cock lazily directly onto your lips, causing beads of precum to escape his tip and cover your lips like lipgloss.

“Fuck, look at you. And you haven’t said a damn word. So pretty when you shut up.”

Your cheeks flush and you say petulantly, “Fuck you.” Because even now you don’t wanna give him the satisfaction.

That’s short-lived though because he starts fucking your mouth again. He shoves his cock inside and starts thrusting into your mouth as if it’s a goddamn sex toy. He hits the back of your throat with every thrust, causing you to gag and cough, your hands squeezing his thighs hard but not pinching.

You can take it.

He grunts out, “Fuck… I swear to god I’ll fuck your pretty little mouth every goddamn time you mouth off from now on Y/N, since nothing else has worked so far.”

Each word punctuated by a harsh thrust, he grunts our, “Just shut. the. fuck. up. Fuuuck.”

He keeps fucking up into your mouth, not easing up even for a second. Your eyes roll back in your head, and all you can do is take it. His thrusts only become sloppier and wetter. His head is thrown back and his abdomen starts clenching hard. But he knows you need to breathe. As much as he wishes he could just cum down your throat; he has other plans…

He pulls your head back again, he’s already feeling a bit too close to cumming. He doesn’t wanna cum too fast, he’s certain it would give you more to talk shit about.

He gazes down at you with heavy-lidded eyes, his mouth parted slightly and his breaths coming in fast. You look utterly fucked. Your makeup is ruined completely now, your eyes are red and teary, and your pretty pink lips are swollen. His stomach flutters, because he thinks you have never looked prettier.

He’s always thought you were so pretty. It’s one of the reasons he can’t stand you. He isn’t supposed to want you. You’re his coworker, technically his subordinate.

But none of that matters now, does it?

He doesn’t look much better, his shirt is covered in wet spit and his boxers are ruined too. He should’ve taken his clothes off… but luckily, he thinks it’s so much hotter this way.

His cock twitches against his belly, and he strokes your cheek with his free hand. He murmurs, “You good?”

You nod stupidly at him even as drool dribbles down your chin and your mascara runs onto your cheeks. There’s nothing to say really. You’ve never enjoyed having a dick down your throat so much. And he has effectively shut you up.

He nods and guides your head up, kisses you deeply. His eyes roll back as he tastes his precum on your tongue. So fucking good, he thinks.

He guides your pliant body to lay down on the couch, and then he settles in between your legs, his hands stroking up and down your thighs as he looks you over. God, there is so much he wants to do to you. He wants to use you but also wants to make you come undone as many times as possible.

Maybe then you’ll be more tolerable. Maybe this is what you both need, he rationalizes.

But he’s getting impatient. His cock is standing tall as he looks down at you, visibly pulsating, jerking upward now and then. And fuck, it’s making you impatient too. So much so that you whine at him, “Fuck, stop looking and just do something.”

His jaw ticks. He’s getting irritated. That’s what you think, anyway. But in reality, he’s preening on the fact you’re just as impatient as he is. It gives him an excuse to cut the foreplay and fuck you stupid.

You want him to do something? Oh, he will.

He lets out an almost mocking laugh, “Yeah? Want me to do something about it? You sure?”

You groan and roll your eyes at him, scooting your ass closer to his pelvis on the couch, his cock dripping so much precum, you have no idea how he’s not losing his mind right now. You certainly are. In fact, he’s starting to piss you off again.

Right as you’re about to talk shit, he can immediately tell. He grabs the front of your button-up and he rips it open. Doesn’t unbutton it like a normal person, but fucking rips it open, sending buttons flying on the floor of the studio. You let out a grunt, and blink at him in surprise with your mouth open.

You liked that shirt. Fuck him.

“Fucking seriously? You’re ruining my clothes now?”

Your patience is almost nonexistent at this point. You have drool and precum drying on your chin, you’re so horny it hurts, and he just ripped your shirt open like a wild fucking animal.

But him? It’s like he’s not even paying attention. His eyes are averted downward, tongue flicking over his lips. He looks almost stupid like this. What the fuck?

You look down to see what he’s gawking at, and… Oh. Oh. Kinda slipped your mind that you aren’t wearing a bra today. You were running late this morning and forgot to throw one on. Oops.

Namjoon doesn’t even look at your face at this point. His eyes are glued to your tits. He feels kind of ridiculous, getting this worked up over tits. He’s seen tits many times, it’s nothing new. But something about yours has him salivating, has his cock jerking upward.

He reaches down and starts lightly slapping the sides of your tits, watching them jiggle with a gaze full of hunger, he rasps out, “Not the only thing I’m gonna be ruining.”

One hand remains playing with your tits like they’re fucking stress balls, and Namjoon would argue that they absolutely are. The other hand reaches down and lifts your skirt, causing it to pool around your waist. He looks down a bit further, begrudgingly tearing his eyes away from your perfect tits, his other hand pushing your ruined panties to the side. He groans, nearly growls when he notices how wet you are. Fuck. He’s so close to losing control.

He dips a single finger into your sopping heat, just barely. Moves the creamy juices around before pushing his finger fully inside, squeezing your tit hard in his other hand. Your hips buck up involuntarily and your head falls back against the couch. You fucking hate yourself for the desperate noise that claws out of your throat.

Namjoon is no better, the moment he feels how wet you truly are, he lets a sound that sounds no better than the one you just let out. His breathing picks up, his heart starts beating faster, and his cock is so hard at this point that it’s actually painful. God, you are just so tight. Your pussy is clenching around his finger as if it’s trying to swallow him whole.

“N-Namjoon— please. Fuck. Please.” You beg again, don’t even care how pathetic you sound. A single fucking finger isn’t enough for how badly you want him right now. Want to be filled up and fucked hard. He’s barely moving it too. Just lightly grazing your walls, and it’s so frustrating. You just want to cum. Get it all out.

Namjoons resolve finally breaks when he sees a trickle of creamy white drip out of your pussy and onto the couch, he can’t take it anymore. He genuinely wanted to tease you, make a fucking mess of you. Make you beg and cry for him because of how much you piss him off. But not even he is strong enough to stall, he needs you. Now.

One last slap to the tit, he pulls his hand away and hastily reaches over for his wallet on the side table next to the couch. He pulls a condom out, brings the wrapper up to his mouth, and tears it open. And fuck, that’s so sexy. Your pussy clenches his finger again at the sight, and then he jerks it out of your pussy with a grunt.

You whine at him, almost feeling offended. But Namjoon knows damn well he’s going a little crazy because he just got jealous. Jealous of his own fucking finger. Should be his cock, not his finger. What the fuck are you doing to him?

He doesn’t warn you before he stuffs the same finger, accompanied by another finger, into your mouth. Nearly making you choke just like you did on his cock. Then he tosses the wrapped condom onto your bare chest, “Put it on me. Quick.”

You don’t even hesitate, you grab the condom with shakey hands and fumble it out of the package, all while sucking his fingers clean of your own juices. It only turns you on more, tasting yourself on his skin.

You reach for his cock, grab it with one shaky hand and his hips buck into it a bit. He lets out a little hiss through his teeth because of how sensitive it is, neglected for too long. That’s how it feels, anyway.

You roll the condom onto his cock snuggly and then look up at him expectantly with a desperate but wrecked look. Give him the best ‘fuck me’ eyes you can muster up. He keeps his fingers in your mouth. Doesn’t even move. Again, drawing it out. Attempting to, anyway.

You whine against his fingers, and would probably be begging him if you could talk. But Namjoon can’t take it anymore, lucky for you. He moves his hips forward and uses his free hand to position his cock at your entrance.

The moment the tip is sucked into your tight hole, he snaps. Literally, he snaps his hips forward, burying himself to the hilt. You cry out even with your mouth around his fingers, sounding muffled and wet. Your back arched obscenely because fuck you didn’t expect him to just go in like that.

You’re not complaining though, fuck no.

His head falls back like yours, and he stays like that for a moment, his teeth grit and eyes clenched shut. He removes his fingers from your mouth and grabs your face with one hand, smooshing your cheeks, the other hand coming back up to your tit and squeezing it harshly, as if he just can’t help himself. Squeezing so hard that it kinda hurts. But fuck, it feels so good. You’re starting to realize maybe you have a thing for shit like this.

Doesn’t help when you feel his cock twitching inside of you. It’s just enough stimulation to make your pussy start throbbing around him.

It’s pathetic how close you already are. But god, it feels like he edged you for hours. Even though he barely did anything. You guess you just kinda forgot what actual dick felt like compared to your fingers or a toy.

He starts moving his hips slowly, trying to be patient while your pussy adjusts to his size. But your patience left the moment he entered you.

“Fuck. Go faster, please.”

Your voice sounds high-pitched and a bit loud which you don’t even realize. You can’t control it. He clicks his tongue at this, gives your face a little shake as he says, “Thought I told you to shut the fuck up? Unless you want all of your coworkers to know you’re letting your boss fuck the shit out of you like a whore? That what you want?”

He pulls back out and then slams in again. You let out another cry, body jolting at the force. And he starts just pounding into you.

You asked for this.

How the fuck are you supposed to be quiet when he goes from 0 to 100 like that? Holy fuck.

“Oh, so you do? You want them all to know I’m making you my slut after humiliating you for your shitty writing? C’mon, speak up. Can’t hear you. Use your fucking words.”

All while snapping his hips harshly into yours, out one moment, deep inside the next. You can barely take it. You swear you can feel him in your fucking stomach. Hardly even register his degrading words because you can’t think, can’t speak, can’t even control the loud noises coming out of your mouth, although you desperately try.

Tears prickle your eyes, not because it hurts but because you’re overwhelmed. He’s so hard to figure out. Acting like he’s gonna tease you one moment, and then fucking you like he’s trying to split you in half the next.

He lets out a grunt at your lack of response and ends up squishing your cheeks harder, forcing your mouth open. He leans down slightly and fucking spits in your mouth and then stuffs his fingers back in your mouth, “Actually, just shut the fuck up. Keep your mouth busy and shut the fuck— ah, fuck— the fuck up.”

Fucking disgusting. Fucking hot.

The way his words falter and he loses train of thought for a second makes your pussy clench deliciously around him. Because it’s confirmation that he is just as affected as you are. Just as fucked up right now.

You both look a mess. Your shirt is torn open, your skirt all crooked and pushed up to your waist, and your panties aren’t even fully off. His shirt is still damp with spit, his pants only halfway pulled down and now there’s a creamy white stain on the front of them from your juices dripping down his dick.

It’s heaven, honestly. Or maybe hell. You aren’t sure. But it feels so fucking good.

His hips piston into your cunt hard and fast, and you do your best to focus on sucking his fingers, but the pressure is building fast. You can feel your pussy start to flutter, your clit throbbing, begging to be paid attention to. He can feel it too, it’s making him go crazy because of how responsive you are.

He slams home one more time before staying there, swiveling his hips in a circle so that his pelvis brushes against your clit each time, giving it the minimal amount of attention that has you nearly seeing stars, almost there, but not quite.

“Need more?” He pants out.

You nod your head quickly, his fingers covered in your saliva at this point. Dripping in the essence of you just like his cock. He nods back, removes his other hand from your hip, and settles it at the bottom of your belly, pushing down and placing his thumb over your clit. He starts flicking it fast and starts fucking into you again, picking up the pace so that the room fills with wet squelching noises and skin slapping.

The way he’s pushing onto your tummy while rubbing your clit, Jesus fuck… it’s intense. Makes it feel like he is inside of your stomach. So fucking deep.

Yup. That does it. The stagnant pressure starts building rapidly, he can feel it too. Your pussy starts tightening and fluttering beautifully around his girth. You’re making the prettiest noises, still quiet thanks to his fingers stuffed in your mouth but he can hear you the perfect amount.

God, it’s so perfect, he thinks.

You, you’re not thinking at all. He really is fucking you stupid. Your eyes are continuously rolling back and your hips buck into his thrusts desperately, quickly approaching your climax.

He flicks your clit back and forth, fast but precisely, “C’mon baby, give it to me. Fucking cum all over me. Make a mess. Ungh— god you’re such a fucking slut.”

And that sends you. Out of everything, something about Namjoon calling you a slut just fucking does it for you. You let out a muffled moan, that would be a scream most likely if his fingers weren’t sheathed into your mouth. Your legs tremble and your body shudders through the force of your orgasm.

Your pussy throbs violently, walls rippling around his cock as you finally see those stars. It feels fucking amazing, makes tears fall down your cheek. You can barely breathe because of the force of how fucking good it feels to cum on his cock.

This is his end too. He simply can’t hold back when he feels the vice grip of your pussy desperately trying to keep his cock in place, the rippling of your walls nearly feels like vibrations. He lets out another groan, but it almost comes out like a whine. Very subtly. His face is scrunched up and his mouth open as his hips stutter, his cock spilling and filling up the condom.

It goes on and on. Neither of you thinking about how much you hate each other, only thinking about how good it feels to be together like this. He swears he’s never had sex better than this. You feel the same.

The reality of it all is hate sex is unmatched. Especially when tensions build for so long and you both act as if you can’t stand each other… who knew a fuck could’ve helped with that?

At the last twitch of his cock, when your pussy becomes overstimulated and sore, he collapses on top of you. Both of you panting harshly, catching your breaths as your hearts beat in unison.

He removes his spit-covered fingers from your mouth, and he places lazy little kisses on your skin. He isn’t even sure where, too fucked out to pay attention, just anywhere he can reach while he rests on top of you. It’s an oddly tender gesture. A little sweet, even.

It’s silent for a few minutes. And you both start to realize what you’ve done. You just fucked your technical boss… he just fucked one of his co-writers.

Definitely shouldn’t have happened.

He can’t find himself regretting it though. He feels so light, that he could almost smile. As much of an excuse as it was at first, it genuinely helped with the tension. He’s not quite as irritated with you. Does he like you now? Fuck no.

But the more post-nut clarity comes to fruition… the more he thinks he can tolerate you. Maybe even work with you, compromise with you.

You on the other hand… you don’t know how to feel. You don’t regret it, because fuck, it did help with the tension. You feel lighter too. Not as sensitive. Not as hateful.

Maybe it was for the best. It’s not like anyone has to know, anyway. It’s like couples counseling sort of… except you’re definitely not a couple, and you both still cannot stand each other.

But you can tolerate each other now that most of the tension is gone for the time being.

“You good?”

He tears you away from your thoughts, and you look up at him with bleary eyes. It makes you feel sort of warm and fuzzy inside knowing despite his dislike for you, he’s still checking to make sure he didn’t cross any lines.

Well, he crossed several lines. But, you aren’t complaining. You’re glad he did. Glad he reduced you to this.

“I’m fucking great.”

That earns you a little chuckle. He sighs a breath of relief, was worried he went a bit too hard or did too much, especially since you didn’t set any boundaries beforehand. But you took what he gave you and you took it like a fucking champ, he thinks.

He reluctantly gets off of you because now that you’re both a bit more clear-headed, the couch feels a little too small, and he doesn’t wanna crush you.

His softening cock is still inside of you, so he braces a hand on the couch and slowly pulls out, both of you hissing at the feeling. He watches in awe as your juices flow freely out of you. God, what a pretty pussy, he thinks.

He dips a finger back into your heat, causing you to let out a little noise of surprise. But he removes it quickly, brings his finger up to his mouth and sucks it clean.

“Mmm. Yummy.” He says, wiggling his brows.

Ugh.

He pats your thigh before getting off of the couch, taking the condom off, and tying it up to chuck it in the trash. He stuffs his soft and sensitive cock back into his underwear and pulls up his pants, feeling utterly satiated now. Bubbly and light, even though he won’t show it. He makes his way to the little fridge in his studio and he grabs two bottles of water, tosses you one which you barely catch.

You gulp down the water gratefully, parched considering he stole most of your fucking spit. Asshole.

He begins walking into the bathroom attached to his studio as he says, “C’mon let’s go get cleaned up. Then we can look at those lyrics again and see if it still sounds like kids bop now that I’ve fucked you stupid.”

At your immediate glare, he lets out a laugh, and shrugs innocently, “What? Pussy is magic, can change a man’s mind about a lot of things. Now hurry up, you’re a fucking mess.”

And with that, he’s stepping into the bathroom.

Yeah. Fuck him. Still insufferable.

But god, you really do hope to fuck him again.

[some-bunniii]

Lucifer dotes on a pregnant!reader [Sneak Peek]

you can find the original prompt here! fem!reader with no use of y/n.

EDIT: Full fic here!

take this little (unedited) blurb from my upcoming longfic! it’s another big one folks, maybe as long as my soul deal fic when it’s finished. character building underneath all that fluff y’know. i’m 13k words in and still going strong, so stay tuned!

“So…. I was a little bored last night,” Lucifer started, adjusting his long collar nervously as you regarded him with a quirked brow, “and, well, seeing as you didn’t have much for the baby, I thought I could give you a hand, soooo I made you this!”

His arm quickly lifted towards you, and you leaned forward to get a look at the small object in his hand.

Nestled in Lucifer’s palm, was a small, yellow rubber ducky. Your eyes widened, breath hitched, as your gaze flicked from the toy to Lucifer, then back to the ducky adorned with a small, white hat. He watched your reaction intensely, and at your silence he cracked an awkward grin.

“For the little one, in case you didn’t have anything for them. It’s even got a little baker's hat, since I know that’s kind of your thing.”

Tears pricked at your eyes, and you took the duck gingerly from his hand, turning it over as you traced the outline of the beak, the cute little hat, and finally the adorable tail feathers curled at its back. It stirred something in you, your stomach swimming with emotions that were threatening to bubble up and consume you while staring at the toy.

He made this… for your baby? As a gift to you? 

That was so sweet of him, and not even Charlie had given you something so thoughtful. Sure, she paid for a majority of your baby necessities—which you owed her your life for, no matter how much the girl disagreed—but she never presented you with something made from the heart like this.

Lucifer did, though. Even if he made a million matching yellow duckies beforehand, he still made this one specifically for you. Had your ex ever cared enough to do something like this for you? You couldn’t recall. And yet, a man who was practically a stranger before you was the one to care enough.

Fuck, you were about to cry. You tried to steel yourself, holding back tears. 

You met Lucifer’s gaze after a few moments, as you softly stroked the little toy with your thumb. The fallen angel only grimaced at your reaction, his smile faltering slightly as he watched your eyes well with tears and your lip start to quiver.

“Do you hate it?” He asked slowly, and you began sniffling softly hiccups building in your chest as you blinked in confusion.  

“Hate—hic—It? Why would you think…?” You started, before you felt tears welling up underneath your chin, and dripping softly onto the ducky close to your chest. 

You mentally slapped yourself, of course Lucifer would think you disliked it with how emotional you were being. Shame ate at you after that. Here the King of Hell was, thinking about you and your baby and making something in his own free time, only for you to reward him with tears.

Curse these hormones!

Now, the quiet sniffles that escaped you were from both sadness and delight, as you clutched the rubber ducky closer to your chest. The tears spilled faster from your cheeks, wetting the ground beneath you. A few droplets landed on your exposed arm, and its cool touch was a welcome sensation from the heat boiling underneath your skin. 

“I-I-I’m sorry, Your Majesty,” you finally breathed, rubbing a hand across your face to get rid of the tears, before you inhaled a sharp breath to calm yourself, “I’m sorry for being such a… such a—”

You clamped your mouth shut, trying to rope in the last bit of control you had over your emotions that were threatening to come undone. You sucked in a large, sputtering breath and Lucifer leaned back, just as your lips quivered violently.

“—a wreck!” you wailed after that, placing your free hand to your mouth to try and hold in your sobs.

Lucifer jumped slightly, closing in the small distance between the two of you as he rushed to your side. He bit his lip, his hand reaching towards you to give comfort, before he hastily pulled it back.

“Wait, no! You’re not a wreck, you’re completely fine. Perfect, even! Oh, please don’t cry…” 

The man was starting to pace as you held a hand to your mouth, slowly but surely clamping down on your outburst of emotion.

“Here, have another one!” A second rubber ducky appeared with a red burst of smoke, landing softly into his palm as he lifted it towards your face, “Don’t worry I have a lot more at home!”

The duckies cute little apron, displaying a cookie and two tiny wooden spoons in the shape of an X, only made your lip quiver more violently. Lucifer slowly pulled the third ducky behind his back and out of view, staring at you with concern as you tried to catch your breath.

“It’s so cute!” you gasped through the tears, before rubbing your eyes once more.

“You think so?” He replied in disbelief.

You nodded your head vigorously, smiling through the tears as you clutched both ducks to your chest. Lucifer slowly caught on, before breathing a large sigh of relief like he just avoided doomsday.

“Are… you two okay?” Came a familiar voice from the edge of the room. You turned your head to see … 🫣

ah, the wonders of hormonal pregnancy changes! sorry for the wait 😔 health issues have arisen and the motivation to write plummets when you’re in pain, but don’t worry, i’m still writing everyday and it should be out soon <3

thanks for the patience 🤍

[widebrimmedhatsblog]

I’d love to hear your thoughts on the ending!!

I'm soooo sorry nonny. This took 5ever. For some reason, I mentally decided that the completion of this ask would be the end of my Onyx Storm era, and then I didn't want to go near it because I didn't want the book to be done :(. However, I was brave, and I did it. This got insanely obscenely long, so you're getting Xaden's chapter 65 now, and then I'll reblog with Vi's LAST chapter some other time.

Chapter 65: Xaden

Veninism: I think the first thing that comes up in this chapter is the insight into the venin mindset. Xaden's significantly more intense (both than earlier in the book, and in his previous POV chapters). At first, I wasn't a huge fan of the "ice" thing, because I missed the part where he explains it (perks of reading till 5 in the morning) and I thought it was some anachronistic hockey reference. (Fun fact: I wrote this out before Rebecca gave that interview revealing that, yes, it WAS an anachronistic hockey reference. I know that lady WELL.) HOWEVER! The way it's explained here, (essay below the cut)

"Wrath courses like a current under the ice I willingly skate onto, cutting my emotions like the burdens they are so I can be the weapon she needs." (Yarros, 520)

reminds me a lot of a PTSD flashback/trauma event. Not only does this make significantly more sense with the metaphor at hand, but it makes a lot more sense with Rebecca's body of work. I know she's made addiction comparisons, and I can see some lines, but, frankly, I think it's a much more intricate web than a 1-1 metaphor. Especially with the use of the word "triggered" to describe what happens to him when he is "on the ice" as it were, I think (if anything) it's about using an addiction to cope with PTSD-type trauma.

Bond Fuckery: After revealing that Xaden cannot kill the sage himself, he goes on to say,

"I could no more raise a blade to his throat than I could Violet. The bond between Violence and me is the kind of magic that has no explanation." (Yarros, 521)

Which....is weird! Given that we have a precise explanation for said bond in Fourth Wing, maybe something else is going on? #the power of love?? I'm not trying to say they're soul mates in any real tangible way because this is not that kind of story, but I do think it means something. I just don't know what yet.

Further bond fuckery themes are found earlier in the book. There's the entire situation with Andarna leaving, in which Leothan says,

"Bonds are merely magical ties. You are irid. You are magic. Bend it, shape it, break it as you see fit." (Yarros, 443)

I've definitely seem some people floating the idea that perhaps Andarna broke Tairn and Sgaeyl's mating bond, re: Tairn's suspicious period of rest on page 526, (I personally thought he was tired from killing some dragons!) and I definitely think that's a possibility. However, I think it's really interesting that, specifically, Leothan also says bend it and shape it. I know we're supposed to finish the book thinking that Andarna/Leothan severed Violet's bond with Andarna, and then re-forged said bond mid-battle. To me...that doesn't really make sense? There was no real moment where you can say, okay, bond re-forged. It just kind of happens? Which I suppose is also how it happens at threshing, so maybe I'm the problem. Still, I think the idea that perhaps Andarna (or another irid??? given her 1 week of training???) bent or reshaped Tairn and Sgaeyl's mating bond (in order to protect Xaden/Xaden's mission/Violet from the consequences of Xaden's mission) is worth considering.

There's also the entire element of modern AU no magic isles. I know a lot of people thought that entire quest section of the book was filler, but I disagree. I definitely think that insertion was meant to demonstrate that the bonds are not as infallible as we've been led to believe, to show their importance to Xaden and Violet, and to further show just how much Andarna is not like other dragons, and therefore able to do shit with the bond.

Xaden's new brother! Xaden starts off describing the new venin by saying,

"and now that my sage has a new sibling he can use against me...I'm screwed." (Yarros, 521)

Then, he goes on to add:

"...my new brother and the unconscious dragon lying in the valley...how could he do this? Choose this after watching me stumble and fall over the last five months. How could he willingly walk the path I've fought like hell to leave? He's the last person I ever would have expected to turn, and yet here we are." (Yarros, 521)

My money's on Bodhi! There's a lot of "brother" mentions surrounding Bodhi, given the repeated descriptions of how similar he and Xaden look. He's "the closest thing (Xaden) has to a brother since Liam." Garrick even thought Theophanie called Bodhi his brother beforehand! It's Bodhi. Further nuance to Bodhi turning is found, in my opinion, in his frustration with Xaden's over-protection at the end of Onyx Storm. This feeling of impotence combined with something potentially happening to Cuir (re: unconcious dragon lying in the valley/Bodhi puking his guts up wherever that quote is) gives him a reason to turn.

I know @skyfallscotland thinks Xaden's new brother is actually Aaric, which is also super intriguing. Specifically, Amy suggested a scenario where Aaric knows he needs to be venin in order to win the war, and is willing to do whatever it takes to get to the future he sees. I do lean more towards Bodhi than Aaric, if only because of the element of knowing for 5 months (which Aaric does not--even if he finds out about Xaden's veninism from his signet, RY has confirmed Aaric didn't manifest in IF, and therefore it cannot have been five months prior to Battle of Draithus), Xaden really seems to care about this new brother. I know he says he has a "complicated sort of loyalty" to Aaric, but I don't think he and Aaric at the friendship level where Aaric can be used against him in the same way Bodhi can. There's also the whole having to give Vi Tyrrendor ordeal. I know some people think Xaden may have had a change of heart and decided to listen to Bodhi in regards to not forcing him to lead Tyrrendor in his stead, and/or Xaden just felt giving Vi the province directly (what a wedding gift!) was the best possible way to protect her. Who knows, not me. I think of Xaden as someone not particularly inclined to listening to people when he doesn't feel like it, but I also know he'll prioritize Vi regardless, so it could go either way.

Slayer! This is just for the one line mention of Berwyn killing the dragons with the alloy dagger. For one thing, I think this draws parallels between the venin and the dragons (which have been a theme the entire series). For another, I think this is how Xaden, Vi, and co. go about killing the dragons and elders in order to get to the eggs. Seems a lot less messy!

Everything, Everywhere, All At Once: Throughout the text, there's a couple mentions of individuals inability to be everywhere all at once. Theophanie, in chapter 60, for example: (from my Kindle copy, so no page numbers, sorryyyy)

"You're just another lightning wielder, mortally incapable of being everywhere at once."

Or, the slightly different take from Mira in Chapter 23:

"Even if he did, we can't be in two places at once."

I have no idea why this got me so bad, but every time I read it, my spidey-senses tingled. I really feel like it means something. Xaden then wraps things up with saying he IS everywhere at once, on page 522 in regards to the veninism amplifying his shadow powers.

Do I know what this means? No! Of course not! At first, I thought it was a papa sorrengail is venin hint, but I don't actually believe in that. I have been holding out hope that perhaps Vi is somehow venin from Lilith (this is why I think papa sorrengail had her dedicated. it doesn't really make sense to me for Rebecca to write her with a real disability, and then have that real disability be a birth defect when it isn't one in real life. that just seems odd?) and I think this COULD be a hint there. Although, as always, who knows.

What is a soul if not love? Some of you may know, I've been getting a wee bit heated about the implications of the corporeal soul. I get a bit gagged by this because it makes no sense. I ask @maethologies probably once a day, what IS a soul? And to that question, I raise you this: what is a soul if not love?

page 523 has this:

""I love you.' Violet's voice cracks the cold, and a silken thread of warmth wedges itself in the opening before it seals shut, locking it in place. No. Wait. I grab for that thread with desperate hands, clawing to keep her as more of my pieces are blown away, lost to the void. She is warmth and light and air and love."

For starters, I think "she is warmth and light and air and love" is my favorite quote from the entire series. It makes me want to cry!!! There's definitely something to the fact that being venin makes Xaden colder, and Violet only seems to get warmer in this book (her lightning being hot enough to blister, for example). But really, my focus here is that he's so aggressively in love with her. I genuinely do not know how people read this line, or the rest of the novel, and somehow thought Xaden was just going to go join up with the venin. Genuinely! I am REALLY not trying to be mean, it just makes no sense to me.

I'm going to go a bit out of order here to further contextualize, but other Xaden Riorson bangers include:

"What even am I? Hers." (Yarros, 524)

And, far earlier in the text, when Courtlyn asks to whom Xaden swears his fealty:

"Violet. (...) My loyalty is to Violet first above everything, everyone else." (this is a Kindle page number because I don't want to find it in my book, LMAO, but it's 326 in that format!)

Again, he's constantly making it as clear as humanly possible that SHE comes first for him. He is not going to spontaneously gain venin loyalty. Whatever soul-fuckery is going on here, it doesn't make him incapable of love. If anything, the presence of love is what is going to continue to save him. In the chapter 48 epigraph, in which a scenario is described wherein a venin returns to their village, desiccating an entire village except for her husband and two children. Clearly, the theme here is that the feeling of love helps venin gain control of themselves when lost to the thrall of power, if you will.

Frankly, there's a LOT of issues with venin as a concept and how willing the fan base is to accept the characterization of the entire "enemy" as evil, soulless, and incapable of feeling and love. Just on the most basic level, think about the real world implications of that ideology for about ten seconds. If you can't do that, think about it in-universe. The entire point of books one and two were that Navarre's government perpetuated a narrative of dehumanization in regards to the Poromish people so that Navarrians could see them as the enemy. This tactic of dehumanization is then DIRECTLY applied to the venin. The narrative on the surface-level is: These people ARE human, but these other guys are the REAL monsters. Please kill THEM instead. I cannot tell you how many times I've seen people say "Violet's never killed anyone in the series, she only kills venin!" The very fact of saying these people aren't human; therefore they can die...do you see what I see? I know I'm a bit more thematically minded than the average romantasy reader, but it's really VERY in your face here.

The most obvious narrative purpose for Xaden choosing to turn is that it gives Violet and the reader a way to humanize the venin, just like working with the gryphon fliers in part two allowed us all to humanize them. After I finished IF, there was not a doubt in my mind that this was where Rebecca was going.

And she went there...a little bit? She's about halfway there, I'd say. Violet has started to internally reconcile with the fact that Xaden being a venin makes it impossible for her to generalize venin any further, but there's definitely still an undercurrent of "he's not like other venin!!" I think this COULD be a logical progression of the story, and, partially, I think it makes sense for it to take a minute for her thought processes to shift. However, I think it needs to be better layered? And I think that when you have a book like this one with such a low barrier to entry, you need to do a bit more thematic hand-holding if you want people to really get things.

Anyway, this was all to say: Xaden loves her, and so, his soul is fine. HE's fine. He's not evil, he didn't marry her just to leave, he's not "team venin". Etc! I could go on about this further, and I think before book 4 I'll be pushed over the edge and do so. But, for now, I do think the direction Rebecca is pushing for is the "cure" being the power of love et. al.

Mommy Issues: We come back to Sgaeyl! I know some people think Sgaeyl breaks the bond with Xaden as part of his 12 hour plan, and again, I ask: literally how.

Basically, unlike his mother, Sgaeyl isn't leaving Xaden. When he breaks through the pulling from the earth haze, he asks Sgaeyl if she forsakes him, and she says:

"'What is there left of you to forsake?' Sgaeyl lowers her head and steam gusts down the canyon, reminding me of the moment she found me in the forest at threshing. (Yarros, 523)

My direct annotation here is : threshing! Threshing = choice. And I'm right! Threshing does equal choice. She has the option to forsake him, and she doesn't! Case closed. I will say, just as a side note, the idea that she'd leave him for being extra venin is wack as hell when he became extra venin for her. I don't think she was that heated about him being venin in the first place: the focus of her ire at the end of IF was that he "picked" Violet. "You cannot! I chose you!/ But Violet chose me too." She's just a pick me dragon at heart.

Quest Squad (Xaden's Version) I touched on this in response to my other ask about the ending, but now we're gonna go beat by beat.

Xaden starts what I call the quest intro by responding to Sgaeyl's threshing part 2 with:

"'You tell me.' I lower the ice and let her in."

Clearly, this is Xaden showing Sgaeyl whatever plan he's been concocting in his head.

Sgaeyl's response:

"Her next breath is laced with sulfur, and her eyes widen. 'You cannot mean to--'"

Now, this is just needlessly vague to make sure we buy the next book. Like we weren't going to anyway. Thank you for extorting me, Red Tower. However, at the very least, it reveals that his plan is, shall we say, problematic? Controversial? Illegal?

Then, we have (from Xaden)

"'You saw what happened. It is the only way.' She glances over her shoulder. 'And you think she'll help?' 'She loves me.' 'Tairn does not, and you haven't looked in a mirror yet. The red veins branching from your eyes look like her lightning.' 'She'll help.' It comes out with a hell of a lot more certainty than I feel. 'She promised.'"

Line by line time!

"it is the only way" is mad interesting from Xaden "the right way isn't the only way" Riorson. It could just be the influence of being venin on his psyche---everything feels more serious now, and he himself is more intense. But it's such an interesting switch, especially since Violet's assumed his way of thinking from FW.

At first I thought the pronoun fuckery in SHE'll help/SHE loves me was meant to indicate that the she in question was not actually Violet, but I don't think so anymore. I do think it's intentionally misleading! Again, for the money. But, more than that, I think Sgaeyl is glancing over her shoulder AT Violet and Tairn to indicate who they're yapping about.

Now, how will she help? I think this is a separate quandary than the marriage (hence where I broke up the text). Personally, I think this is him saying Vi goes with him to get the eggs/kill the dragons/etc.

The veins branching from his eyes are intriguing. I know he says he's no longer an initiate on this page, but I don't think he's an Asim either? According to Mr. Drake Cordella's venin compendium, Asim's veins distend only when riled, but Sage's veins are perpetually distended. (Iron Flame chapter 47 epigraph). I guess we'll see? I don't know, it would make sense to me if he was a sage, but who knows.

And, finally, what the hell did she promise?

WAY earlier on in the book, Xaden says:

"Swear you'll sound the alarm if I go too far, that you'll keep it safe, even if it's from me." (Yarros, 58)

This is what I think he's referring to! I know @hockeyspiral23 thinks the 'it' in question is actually the sword of Tyrrendor (correct me if I'm wrong!!) and not Tyrrendor itself. I definitely think there's something to that theory.

A few pages later, Xaden says:

"I'll use Tyrrendor to protect you, not you to protect Tyrrendor." (Yarros, 102)

Not to be a broken record, but again: Intentionally! Misleading! Content! I think you're SUPPOSED to interpret the promise as Violet saying she'll protect Tyrrendor from Xaden, and Xaden saying he's "gone too far". But when you actually look at the text, there's no way that's what he's saying. First of all, why would Sgaeyl think THAT plan wouldn't work with Tairn? Tairn does NOT fuck with Xaden right now. And then, why would Xaden Riorson, president and CEO of the Violet Sorrengail fan club, prioritize Tyrrendor over Violet? He cares about Tyrrendor, sure, but in the face of VIOLET? It doesn't compare. It just doesn't! ("I love you more than this city. Do not die defending it.") He's not winning any king of the year awards with those priorities, but that doesn't make it any less true. I basically already have a post ranting about this, (here! If you're curious) so I'm going to cut myself off here. Basically, we have to remember who Xaden actually is when we try to contextualize this vague ass chapter.

And then, wedding bells!

"'Even if she agrees, no one will--'

'Someone owes me a favor.'" (Yarros, 524)

This is the part of the quest that I think is more directly the marriage issue. This has already been covered elsewhere, but the Priestess from Dunne's temple says she owes Xaden a favor earlier on. She goes on to officiate their marriage. I just think the wording makes it clear that this is a multi-step plan. (How can Violet "help" with her own marriage?)

I already quoted the absolute banger "What even am I? Hers." But I'm going to bring it up again! His loyalty, primarily, is to Violet. Whatever quest he's going on, it's FOR HER. He steals the eggs FOR HER. He''s taking them somewhere FOR HER. I don't know how to make that any clearer, but if I keep seeing people misinterpret it, I'll probably try again.

Agency!

The final bit I'm going to pull is Sgaeyl saying:

"And her decision will determine our fate." (Yarros, 524).

I think this just really succinctly makes clear my 573938503 argument above. Violet gets final say on Quest Squad (Xaden's Version) but whatever he does do, he's doing it with Sgaeyl. I know there's some good bits Rebecca's said throughout the tour that support this interpretation, but I don't think I need them quite yet. Maybe next time!

For now, that's all. I'll see y'all back here with Violet's chapter in a bit!

[pupmkincake2000]

So, I played Baldur's Gate 3 four times (as Gale rpmancing Astarion, as Astarion romancing Gale, as Durge romancing Halsin, as Durge romancing Gale) and here are the conclusions I came to:

Gale is soooo main character/leader coded. I enjoyed playing as Durge, but playing as Gale and watching him through all 4 playthroughs I realized he is better for this role than anyone else. He's smart, intelligent, kind, he has seen some shit in his life, and won't die on the first day after the nautiloid's crash. Yes, physically he may be weaker than many other characters, but with the amount of knowledge and magic power he is capable of a lot things, and he is also sweet and helps those in need (I consider canon the route when the hero does a lot of good things, including saving the Grove, saving prisoners in Moonrise Towers, etc. ) and is ready to give up god powers for the one he loves. He would be a great leader. You may disagree, but I think hes perfect as a main character.

Despite my dislike of Astarion as a character (and my sudden love for Durge x Gale ship), I think Gale's romance with him is the best and most... uncliched? And I just love it so much! It is precisely because they are two halves of the same coin, they have a lot in common and are able to make each other better. Considering that Astarion's best ending is the one in which he, remaining a vampire spawn, becomes either a traveler or happily married to Gale. Just imagine: Astarion will finally have a loving family, a home, a loving husband (and I’m not even surprised that Gale is the only one who proposes marriage to his lover), he will have a happy, well-fed life, he can choose a profession he enjoys or he can travel with Gale when Gale, as a professor, gets his vacation. After all, every Academy has summer holidays, and Gale himself says that sometimes he misses adventure. And I wouldn't mind reading a story about them travelling the world together again.

Ascended Astarion is the worst version of Astarion, no matter what anyone says (I decided to ascend him in my last playthough and oh gods he's so disgusting!). He doesn't love his consort, I will never believe he does, not to mention his consort is nothing but a pet to him. He is also even more narcissistic and manipulative and is just another Cazador, just a bit worse. This is exactly the impression I got. Plus, he is an evil that needs to be eradicated.

I really enjoyed playing as Durge. Moreover, I really like his redemption. This is that very case when redemption actually works and the character can actually start their life anew. But to be honest, I missed Gale's reaction to Durge's revival after Bhaal drained him of all his blood and after Jergal brought him back to life. But probably any romantic character has no reaction to this.

Wild Magic. The best magic ever.

Karlach and Wyll are made for each other. In my first two playthroughs, Karlach either died or became an illithid, but then I managed to send her with Wyll to Averno. The way he asks her to go with him so that she won’t be lonely, the way he later talks at a party about their joint adventures, the way Karlach says that if it weren’t for Wyll, she would never have returned there... all these moments are the best. It's even more than enemies to lovers, it's a full-fledged healthy relationship built on friendship, trust, support… it's amazing. Just think about it: Wyll did this for her sake, he literally agreed to go with her to hell, where the conditions of survival for a human being are very difficult, just so that she would not be lonely and so that she would not die. I want to believe that they will still be able to repair Karlach’s heart and return to Faerun together.

[pareidolla]

Saw your recent broken post - please I would love to hear more about the "anger and resentment" category!!

MY BROKEN COMRADE IN ARMS! YES, ANYTHING FOR YOU!

although i am wringing my hands in embarassment because the topic of broken's characterization is something i'm very passionate about, but i've complained about it before, and i don't want to come across as too whiny. i don't believe any one person should be seen as an authority on a character's portrayal, and i don't want to cause anyone undue stress. he's a video game character, it's not that serious.

that being said ⸻ broken is a very angry and bitter voice and i wish that was acknowledged more often!!!

you're the one making things difficult, you're the one making us hurt.

even outside of the tower's pet line, the voice of the broken reminds me of an abused dog. a dog will fight you, naturally, but you are stronger, and if it is wise, it will realize resistance is pointless. you can harm a dog as much as you'd like until it learns to do whatever it takes to satisfy and stay your hand. only then will you reward it, and only then will the dog merely flinch between caresses.

but submission isn't love, and a dog still has it's teeth.

as a hardcore simp, i've read as many broken opinions and writing i can get my paws on, and i've noticed a tendency to depict him as someone who holds no animosity unless directly influenced by tower. in their eyes, he pathetically loathes himself and believes that the other voices are superior in every way.

i disagree with this because, to put it bluntly, broken literally hates everyone. canonically! he may be a sad little shelterdog deserving of many head pats but he's not soft with anyone. his sadness shouldn't distract from the fact he firmly believes the other voices are delusional in a hopeless situation. broken never shows admiration for anyone other than the princess, but he's obviously not always thrilled with her either.

who cares if you (narrator) think we're special? as far as i can tell, the only thing special about us is that we get to experience painfully dying all over again.

[we] can't even surrender right

he's (cold) even worse than her (nightmare).

i think the best demonstration of this is how people approach broken's regret over his actions during the tower route. he's usually portrayed as overly regretful and melancholy for stabbing the long quiet, which makes sense, but i'd like to remind everyone that we have his canonical reaction, and he doesn't care lmao.

(literally my favorite broken line i must shamefully confess he sounds soooo hot here.)

which makes sense! broken is sorrowful, yes, but his more violent actions and words are motivated by an innocent desire to be safe. when he remains silent after being insulted or avoids conflict, it's not because he's afraid of the others, but because he believes it is safest for him to accept the hurt now rather than being inflicted with additional harm later. he's not going to apologize for attempting to save everyone when their futile efforts have now locked them into a cycle of being slain over and over by the princess's hands. like, literally the one thing he wanted to avoid.

it's also why his relationship with tower makes me want to gnash my teeth against the bars of my enclosure. they aren't good for eachother but they're so beautifully entwined and and their dynamic is so...?

broken's soulmate isn't physically incapable of hurting him like damsel, but she isn't determined to hurt him like razor or nightmare. for the price of his everything belong to her, she's able to save him, melting his anger into adoration, and he's even willing to hurt himself endlessly for her. i'm gonna 'hrow up.

[greattigerssimp]

do you have a personal ranking list of PO boxers from most bae to least bae

Yeah! Here it is ^^ (pretend Great Tiger is above the 10/10 category)

(Tw: me personal opinions about the top boxers ahead! If you disagree, that's okie, but it's just my opinion lol)

(Tw: also talks of sex)

- Wouldn't date King Hippo because I hc him as a straight up animal and the more I think about it... he's probably my least favorite character. I'm so sorry @ohshy

- Passing on Doc and the Ref bc they both bland imo... although I'd put Doc above the ref bc he's got a good personality and we could be friends, bit I wouldn't wanna do anything bae-like with him

- Passing on Sandy too bc he's scary and bland at the same time. He's bland in the fact that his only personality is "boxing" (off topic but I'm tired of ppl saying the other characters aren't boxers bc they too cartoony... like bruh, if you want a realistic boxing simulator with super serious straight-faced boxers, go play an ea game lol) and like... that's it. He's just the strongest, and not in a fun way. But he's also scary bc if I met him irl I'd feel too afraid to even have a normal conversation with him... nevermind find any attraction for him. Also his haircut in his title defense mode is whack

- Whoever said Bald Bull borders on being ugly and handsome is 💯 on the money. Sometimes if I think of him long enough, I could see him as hot? Especially nowadays now that I'm more engrossed into the characters... but him being bae is kinda problematic bc of the obvious issue of his rage issues... like ik Arans got that issue too but Aran is something else, and even if Bull wouldn't break my pancreas if I pissed him off, he'd be at the top of the date category at most.

- Dragon Chan is THE most Bae spo boxer. I like their hair, their build, their unqiue fighting style... I wish they had a more defined voice though... and a 3D sprite. Really, if DC was in the Wii version of punch out, they'd be way up list. They're a rough draft of what would be a smash, but with some development, DC could be soooo freaking attractive.

- Soda is tall and muscular... I love his himbo vibes, but that's about it. His skin is pinkish red (which isn't really a handsome attribute- like tf are you Patrick star-) he'd be an awesome cuddle partner, and would probably treat me right, but that's about it.

- Bear Hugger is also a great cuddle partner. First of all, stan body diverse boxers, second of all, he loves animals and nature, which is a wonderful personality trait. I like his carefree attitude, his squirrel, I like Candian-ness, and with the right art style, he could be really handsome. But there's also the obvious turn off that keep me from smashing him... he probably smells bad, no matter how much I lie to myself, that's probably the truth, and while I praised his confidence to be a boxer while also being chubby, I feel like that could get in the way of smashing... and general appeal (not saying chubby people aren't attractive! I'm chubby too, but in this particular case, it doesn't quite work!!). A one-night cuddle stand would be nice, but I wouldn't go further than that.

- Macho Man is an absolute character. He's got so much personality and spunk, I like his voice, his confidence, his half surfer persona... he's probably a poster child celebrity crush for most people in the PO verse. The thing is, I probably won't do anything long-term with him. This gray-haired, fake tan hoe is NOT loyal! He's surrounded with girls in most of his cutscenes... very, objectively beautiful ones... that sorta makes me think I, being the NOT rich, skinny Hollywood stereotypical beautiful girl I am, would either be out of his league or the first one he ditches. Basically, I'd love to at least cuddle with him and maybe have a breakfast date, buuuut I can't truly love him. He's a southern California boy, and I'm a northeastern girl.

- Piston Hondo is incredibly unproblematic. He's definitely loyal, has his values in place, he's got a great build, a handsome voice, he's strong... I absolutely see the sex appeal, Hondo fans. It's very high... but I don't think I would pursue him. I feel like if we were in a relationship, I wouldn't fully be comfortable. I feel like he'd expect a lot from me to live up to and to put it simply... he's way out of my league. Tbh, I wouldn't have a chance with ANY of these fictional boxers, but with Hondo especially, I feel like I'd be lying awake every night thinking, "He deserves soooo much better than me... I definitely did something wrong today..." So yeah, I'd almost smash, but I don't think I could commit to him. I know my reasoning is really dumb, but idk, I'd feel really nervous around him if we did become official. But damn, would he be a great cuddle partner... wonderful one night stand contender, too. Love ya Hondo, but you're TOO good, honestly.

- Our first smash! Disco Kid! Love Disco Kid... he's full of life and smiles, he dances through life like it's a party... he's good-looking, carefree, he dances, he's rich and successful, he's got a nice voice... and I absolutely love how he doesn't hold any hard feelings for Mac when he loses. He picks himself up and comes back swinging and having even more fun doing what he loves. That's so mature of him, and he's the youngest opponent you face (being 20 years old)... if everyone was like Disco Kid, the world would be a better place. There's one teensy weensy thing keeping him from the REAL baes... he's got endless energy. I feel like he'd be the type of guy that wants to party all night and then still be up for doing stuff with you the next morning. So yeah, I would love to smash with him, but nothing committed because I feel like he'd be too much for Lil introverted me.

-- And now, the top 5 baes 💜💜💜💜💜-

Don Flamenco 🇪🇸 🥀

- If you asked me what I thought of Don Flamenco when I first entered the fandom I would've been like "he's okay lol bros got that goofy ahh total drama headshape".... but now, I think Don Flamenco is a total bae. This man will shower you with attention and romance, he'll dedicate boxing moves in your name- he dances, he has a gorgeous twunk body, his voice and accent are absolutely gorgeous... Don is a dream boat. And the more I think about his story with Carmen, the funnier it is, because he takes it so seriously and goes full on emo... it's kinda pathetic, but in the best way possible. I love Don sm, and him being bald isn't a turn-off at all. Whether it's natural male baldness (that he's having at 23, oof) or if Carmen actually ripped it out of his scalp, or what not... I'd really just accept him for who he is. Isn't that what love is about? <3

Von Kaiser 🇩🇪 🔩

- There are sooooo many fucking sexy things about Von Kaiser... I have to just list them

- Absolute stud, body wise. Would 100% sleep on his chest. Also, he looks HOT ASFUUUUCK in that white tank top in his title defense cut scene!!! (You know the scene lol)

- I love his voice and accent, just like Don (voice means a lot to me, personally)

- I like that he has experience working with kids, bc as someone who also used to work with children, that's like- such a huge appeal, being able to have the maturity and ability to provide protection is so charming to me personality (I have mommy and daddy issues haha 🥲)

- Look, he's got obvious mental problems, but I kinda love him for that. It makes him deep, and it makes me root for him 10x more than I would for little Mac because I don't know what happened that messed him up... personally, I don't think it was a war, but perhaps it is some form of ptsd? I just wanna heal him... let us bang, but let me hold this man by the face and tell him he's amazing and worth it. Idfc if he's 42, he's a handsome, hurt dilf, and I want him.

Aran Ryan 🇮🇪 😈

- Listen y'all... Aran Ryan is problematic, and you shouldn't be with someone like him irl... but he's still really fucking hot. Do I have to explain it? The muscles, the red hair, the ever so slight stubble he has, his Irishness oozing from his voice (Irish people are biologically based and sigma, objectively. Source: I am 0.000262% Irish 🤓/hj). He could break my pancreas if he gets angry, but he's handsome, and I would thank him for it. And yeah, I kinda like the crazed attitude, sue me. Look, straight male mfs will argue how they could "fix" stereotypically beautiful fictional women but will freak out and cry "problematic" when women acknowledge how handsome Aran is. Fuck you straight men, I LOVE ARAN RYAN!!!!

Glass Joe 🇫🇷 🥐

- Do I gotta say anything? Glass Joe has got to be the cutest damn Nintendo character ever, and I mean every word of it. He is sooooo freaking adorable and sexy. Everything about him is either beautiful or cute. I love his hair, his eyes, his adorable French accent, this skinny build which differs and is unique from the other boxers... I love his simple, ordinary life. He chills, loves pastries, he loves his home city. And bro, that black sweater on him... too cute!! But he isn't a straight weakling either. Like, he's not the strongest, but he'd definitely try to defend you if you ever run into trouble. Dates with him would be the sweetest thing, and fucking with him? Utter bliss. I love you so much, Glass Joe. You deserve your fans and your online fangirls.

Great Tiger 🇮🇳 🐅 💜

- Great Tiger is the single most sexiest man ever placed into a Nintendo game. Fucking fight me... he has everything a perfect man would have. He has a gorgeous hourglass body, well groomed facial hair, that beautiful buttery voice (Great Tiger asmr when Next Level Games???), he sings, he dances, he knows magic (which objectively makes sex better, I would know, don't ask), he's powerful, but he's also got a sense of humor... Great Tiger is just perfect. He is absolutely top PO mareiage material, nevermind bae. His only crime is being a difficult fight.

[hwangyeddeongie]

hey! do you have any yeji nsfw hcs? she’s been driving me crazy lately 😵‍💫

Aww yisss my first anon! Welcome :) (also yes, when does yeji NOT drive us crazy)

CW: smut. Men and minors DNI. I suggest going to find something angstier or fluffier :)

I’ve never done a hc format before so I hope this doesn’t suck lol

(I’m the #1 believer in switch!yeji even though @ddeongies might disagree with me so switch!yeji it is 😈)

-first sub yeji cos she’s literally my baby

-literally such a softie both in bed and out of it

-takes care of you soooo well

-her favourite thing is being eaten out, like there’s nothing better for her

-thinks the sight of your head between her legs is one of the sexiest things ever

-blushes a lot

-like a LOT

-you look up from eating her out and she’ll turn bright red

-super loud but tries to hide it by stuffing her fingers in her mouth or biting her fist

-her eyes will start to flutter closed but she forces herself to keep them open cos she loves looking at you

-she 100% wants to make you feel good too, like she won’t be satisfied until she makes you come

-even if she’s overstimulated to the point of pain, she won’t stop moving against you until you come

-if you use a strap on her, she likes to ride

-she’ll put her forehead on yours or on your shoulder and absolutely grab at your hair

-if you grab her hips while she’s on top of you. oh my god. she’ll whimper SO loud

-be prepared for her to bite you, especially to muffle her moans

-speaking of moans

-she literally makes the prettiest noises?? 🥺

-all high and whiny and breathless she really makes it known you’re making her feel good

-not really talkative? like she’s very loud but poor baby can barely make a single coherent thought and you’re literally fucking her silly

-at least when she’s bottoming

-which brings me to (drumroll please)

-dom yeji 🧎‍♀️

-SO cocky

-like it’s a complete 180 from when she’s in her sub space

-she can still be shy though cos she’s yeji and she flusters really easily (and I said so >:<)

-here is where I insert my yeji oppa agenda

-has a HUGE daddy kink

-call her oppa/daddy? two possible outcomes:

-1: she’ll get super blushy and shy and bury her head in your shoulder

-2: she’ll smirk and adjust the angle she’s fucking you at to make you SCREAM

-“you make me feel so good, daddy.” “Mmh, gonna make me come, oppa.” SHE GOES ABSOLUTELY FERAL

-loves to point out how much you want her

-“you’re so wet already, baby. All of this for me?” “I’ve barely done anything and you’re already begging?” “be a good girl for daddy and tell me how good I make you feel” 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️

-her strap game is out of this world do I even have to say it

-her favourite position is missionary cos she loves to see your face when you come

-she’ll also show off her strength to you cos she knows it turns you on

-she’ll fuck you against the wall just holding you up with her hands because she’s daddy like that

-won’t rest until you can’t say anything except her name and maybe “daddy”

-regardless of if she’s top or bottom, she’ll ALWAYS say “I love you”, when she’s coming, when you’re coming, when she’s kissing you

-she just loves you a lot :(

-now onto aftercare

-so so soft

-if she was topping, she’ll lay you down gently and go get you a glass of water and a warm towel to clean you off

-if she’s completely fucked out she’ll curl into your side and put her head on your chest to listen to your heartbeat

-will always cuddle you to death

-she will literally cry if you try to leave the bed

-if you have to go to the bathroom she’ll follow you all pouty and wrapped up in a blanket like a burrito

-loves showering with you afterwards and massaging shampoo into your hair

-if you’re both not too tired this will probably lead to another round in the shower

-didn’t mention this earlier but she LOVES hickies and will leave them any chance she gets

-loves to admire them when you’re both lying in bed, still panting

-she’ll trace them with her fingers and kiss them 😭

-because she’s an idol, she can’t really let you leave any on her (which makes her so sad) but she’ll let you mark her up in…discreet places

-(around her breasts, on her lower hips, and her inner thighs)

-this also goes for you if you’re also an idol

-sometimes you’ll leave a very obvious hickey smack on her neck if you’re feeling territorial

-she’ll whine and complain about it but she secretly loves it

-you know because she makes no effort to cover it up the next morning and literally shows it off at work

-anyway I’m a sucker for hickies but LETS MOVE ON

-when you wake up (sore, obviously) it’ll be from her peppering kisses all over your face

-she’ll say “good morning baby” in that deep, raspy voice of hers (save me omg)

-which inevitably turns you on and leads to another round

-(see this is why I could never date her because I would never let the poor woman leave the bed)

-she’ll be SUPER gentle though, since you’re both extra sensitive in the mornings

-you’ll make breakfast since we all know yeji cannot be left unsupervised in the kitchen

-she’ll give you back hugs while you cook and keep kissing the back of your neck

-she’s just very clingy okay :(

-if she has to go to work she’ll give you a long, deep kiss that leaves you breathless

-throws out an “I love you!” as she walks out the door + her notorious eye smile

[bl-inded]

At this point, the whole world knows that I love drawing parallels between Yotha and Faifa, because (fight me on this, idc) they are soooo much more similar than either of them would like to admit. And it breaks my heart. (I wish I knew more about Newton to add him to these, but alas)

They are both just hurt kids trying to protect their inner child and so they are scared to let other people in. You might be like "The sunshine with a million friends and the dark horse who can't even say a non-threatening 'Hi'! How could they be similar", but hear me out!

Yotha is very open about not wanting more people in his life. He has the people he has and letting anyone new is a whole chore and then some. So he lets the rumour mill spread scary stories about him. The less people he has to interact with sober, the better. So Gun is an unwelcome surprise for him. He grows to love him because he wants to allow for that to happen, but Gun is an exception.

(ep10)

Fai on the other hand, our resident social butterfly, is a bit of a wildcard. Instead of pushing people away he pulls them in and keeps them at arm's length. He drives the conversation so he doesn't have to be a part of it, which is devastating when you realise it.

He speaks to everyone on the campus. He gets a million birthday gifts from people we as the audience don't even get to see on screen! And he is his brother's keeper (making sure Yotha is okay, not getting into too much trouble, trying to not be emotionally constipated etc.). But, not a single one of them knows Faifa beyond what he lets them know.

(ep14, That is not a well-adjusted answer to "How are you", but I digress)

No one gives him credit for all the emotional labour he pulls, and he doesn't expect them to. He might be the youngest child, but maybe because he was the only one living with his mom (with his younger step-siblings for a while? potentially?) he definitely behaves like the oldest child, bearing the burden of maintaining peace in his family at the expense of his own.

(ep14, "And look at Fai. He's nice to everyone...^")

But I kinda disagree with Newton here. Yotha is definitely the most open about his emotions among the three of them. But Faifa knows how to love. He loves his brothers and his friends, and I believe even his mom (despite everything). He doesn't know how to be loved. And guess what! Neither does Yotha! It's literally why he cannot accept how important Gun is to him. Because people have shown them over and over again that they are not worth staying for (my babies 🥲🥲). So its no wonder they don't trust others easily.

It's a case of 'same hell different demons' for both of them!! It gets soooo obvious when you know what to look for. UGH.

[darling-im-wonderstruck]

hello ^-^ i’d like to request a meet-cute w peter in which they have mixed up orders in a cafe? ty!

sugar rush.

synopsis : your day starts as it always does, but little did you know, your daily trip to the cafe down the block would lead to you finding quite a charming boy.

pairing : peter parker x reader

wc : 560 +

warnings : none ! a lottttt of fluff :)

‎‎ masterlist | request | navigation

a/n : hi anon ! <3 thank you for such a cute request !! hope u luvvvv it :) @strawberrystarcake, thank you soooo much for editing, as always <3

your morning starts like usual. you got ready, replied to gwen, confirming that you two were still on for brunch. the answer was yes— but brunch or no brunch, you still needed your morning cup of coffee at your everyday cafe down the block. so you embark on your daily walk to said cafe. you quite enjoyed the calm and cozy atmosphere that the space provided, though you wouldn’t be staying for long, given you had plans. “[y/n] and… newter?” the barista called out, almost immediately, you stand up and head to the cashier, unintentionally accompanied by a boy who looked too awake for the time of morning it was. “it’s peter, actually.” he smiles and the woman behind the cashier apologizes as he took his drink, and so did you.  hm, peter. his hair was styled with a little to much gel for some, he sported a warm, thin-lipped smile on his face, and he had a t-shirt that read “the physics is theoretical, but the fun is real” which you grinned at.

your train of thought was interrupted as soon as you took a sip of your coffee. immediately, the overwhelmingly sweet taste of vanilla and caramel hit your tongue.

you pause. that was not what you’d ordered. you took a look at your cup to read the order, instead of your name, you see the name “Newter” with a smiley face right beside it. you couldn’t help but smile. you turned in his direction and your eyes met, “peter? i think i got your order. i took a sip, do you mind?”  “oh! not at all, i drank some of yours too, do you… seriously drink this?” he chuckles shyly. oh, you had to admit, the boy was cute. “at least im not inhaling a cup of melted sugar every morning!” you respond, a clearly fake look of disgust on your face, causing peter to laugh. “this tastes like dirt.” he looks at the cup and scans your order, “pure black coffee? that’s honestly concerning.” “well, if you’d like, we can move on and agree to disagree with each other's life choices.” you playfully roll your eyes. he was beginning to pique your interest every passing second. you started to notice more about him; how he constantly had his hands in his pockets, he must be nervous, how his nose seemed to be just a little crooked, how his one eyebrow was a little wilder compared to the other. “mm, alright then,” he hesitates for a moment, “d’you wanna sit with me?” perhaps he found you interesting too. you wince, not because you didn’t want to, but because you were going to be late to meet up with gwen. “aw, i’m really sorry, it’s just that-“ “no, no, it’s okay. i mean it’s kinda crazy that, me, a stranger would ask to sit with you, i mean it’s probably-“ “actually, can i have your number?” you ask, an almost a cautious tone in your voice. “wait, seriously?” he says, he looks as if he’s victorious as soon as you asked him. “i’d like to see if you’re just as sweet as your drink.” you two smile at each other, in silence for a moment. you try to ignore the flush of pink on his cheeks (and the heat rising to yours) as you gave him your phone. he immediately puts in his number and his contact name: ur daily dose of sweetness. you couldn't help but giggle. “i’ve gotta get going… but it was wonderful meeting you, newter.” you joke, his face scrunches up as he laughs. “it was wonderful meeting you too, [y/n].”

taglist : (send me an ask to be added !) @live-laugh-lovejoy @parkerpeter24

a/n : ORRR !!! should i say “it was enchanting to meet you.” HSJSJSJJD SORRY I COULDN'T HELP IT- thank you for reading !!! please reblog or give me some feedback if you enjoyed <;;3 luv u allll

[selfinsertopinions]

thoughts on: Y/N character with a set appearance

soooo let's start this blog off with an opinion of mine: if your audience self-insert or y/n character has a set appearance, DON'T CALL IT Y/N!!!

in my eyes, the point of a y/n type character in an illustration is to be able to insert yourself into the image with your fave character or the scenario or whatever. it defeats the purpose to me if ppl then proceed to make a specific character with a specific appearance and then tag it as y/n or "x reader."

ESPECIALLY as a poc who does NOT look like what half of these writers/illustrators make (i am not white-skinned, i do not have straight or wavy hair, and i am not skinny)

having multiple set appearances (like skin tone/hair alts) is a bit better but honestly i much prefer when things are kept as vague as possible. which granted, i know in writing can be really hard to do, but in illustrations?? it's not that hard to make a gray anonymous character with y/n somewhere on their body or even just a gray anon.

"so daisy are u saying the art is bad???" no, if anything a lot of these ppl are very skilled! and i won't call out anyone specifically. just know it's a bit of a trend that i personally dislike if only because it makes things feel very exclusive. and i believe that y/n type artwork/fanfic should be open to everyone if not just a majority of people!

and i get that a lot of ppl do look like these stand-in characters (white-skinned, brown or black hair, etc.) but i still think it's better to just...not tag it as y/n. bc not everyone looks that way.

tl;dr if you make a y/n character have an appearance i don't personally think that should be considered y/n content. writing or illustration.

anyone disagree? agree? let me know your thoughts!

[s0m3b0dy2u]

https://www.tumblr.com/s0m3b0dy2u/771519899262664704/this-has-probably-been-said-before-but-guys-stop

it is MUCHHHHH better lmao

how is it better? please, please tell me how its soooo much better

first of all, when it comes to genuine conversations like this, i cant take anons seriously, especially if they dont defend their stance.

second of all, one of the many things i hate most is people who just claim theyre so much better than everyone else, especially if theyre literally not

shiftblr, not the entire community, but a lot of people ive seen on here are toxic and purist, and people that stand out against them get attacked and its so stupid. like, its really not that hard to be a good person and take the time to see someone else's point of view????

and, sure, a lot of popular people on shifttok were known for spreading misinformation, but not everyone. some of the sweetest, kindest people ive seen on the internet have been small shifftok creators. also, theres a lot of cool things on shifttok like script tours, and while there is that kind of stuff on here, shiftblr has, since ive been on here, mostly aimed towards advice and "harsh motivation" (which is essentially just berating others, like be soooo fr)

neither is more helpful than the other and tbh neither of them are really good for advice

honestly, if you disagree, or youre one of those "shiftblr is better"

fuckin shiftblr glazers idk

extremists, purists, whatever

then leave.

just leave, unfollow, block me, idc

these people are suuuper annoying, like id rather be stuck in a room with a religious extremist or a trump glazer atp

[markantonys]

"Rand's misguided chivalry is a central flaw of his character. If you remove it from his character in the show he's not the same character anymore." I have seen this argument few times about Rand and I have never understood it and strongly disagree. I always felt that his central flaw was believing he has to do everything alone. And his chivalry as it's depicted in the books simply wouldn't work with how show Rand has been characterized thus far.

Like, show Rand actually respects women as individuals whereas book Rand puts them on pedestals (I love him but it's true). I am curious how the show is gonna handle his conflict with the Maidens cause I can't see show Rand forbidding them from fighting cause they're women. The only thing I can think of that the show might do is he's hurt when they in particular die cause they're all he has left of his birth mom cause she was a Maiden.

100% agreement! imo many readers mistake "X is a big thing in the books" for "X is an important thing in the books" (though of course, we all have our own personal opinions on what is important or not based on our own individual interpretations of the story, so MY opinions on what's important or not are hardly right all the time either!). is misguided chivalry a big thing with rand in the books? yes. but does it affect the story or his character development in a significant way? i'd argue it doesn't, in the sense that the same narrative purposes can be accomplished by making his attitudes gender-neutral. if you change "rand has a problem with women dying for him" to "rand has a problem with anyone dying for him", or "rand wants to protect women" to "rand wants to protect everyone", or "rand/LTT is traumatized by his murder of his wife" to "rand/LTT is traumatized by his murder of his whole family", that doesn't alter the core of his story & character. the core of rand is someone who's so afraid of and guilty about hurting the people around him that he pushes them away and tries to carry all his burdens alone; there's no narrative need for him to have a specific hangup about women getting hurt, and that core doesn't change if that hangup is removed.

plus, multiple male characters share the same hangup about women getting hurt. how can misguided chivalry be soooo central to Rand Specifically when mat and perrin also suffer from it? when practically every society in WOTworld is set up to keep women from being soldiers or participating in situations where they might be harmed? even the aiel & seanchan place restrictions on what women are allowed to be warriors (only the unmarried & childless, because as soon as you become a man's wife or a child's mother your most important duty is now staying alive and safe For Them; meanwhile husbands and fathers have 0 restrictions from being warriors in any WOTworld society). imo it was much more of an internal cultural bias on RJ's part than it was a specific character choice for rand and rand alone (which is not a knock on RJ; all storytellers have their own internal biases that they bring to their stories, it's human nature! but not all of those biases are required for the story to work, and it's also human nature for adaptors to replace the original creator's biases with their own.)

it's also worth noting that the show is being made in a different time than the books. no matter what some readers think, a story being told in a different time HAS to be altered to better suit the audience of that time. we're supposed to sympathize with rand, but most viewers in the 2020s would find his benevolent misogyny irritating and frustrating, and it would turn them off of his character and make them find it difficult to understand or sympathize with his actions or his trauma. as someone who came into WOT brand-new in the 2020s, i had absolutely ZERO sympathy for any of rand's moaning about Must Protect The Women and all of that stuff accomplished nothing besides making me want to bang his head against a wall (i still love him though lmao). it was genuinely detrimental to the pain i was supposed to feel from rand's arc because i kept getting annoyed instead of sad! and i would be FAR from the only brand-new-to-WOT-in-the-2020s person to feel that way if the show had included that angle. for example, rand struggling to hurt lanfear ~because she's a woman~ and moiraine "dying" as a result would have 2020s audiences screaming at him for being a fucking moron, and a sexist fucking moron to boot. rand struggling to hurt lanfear because he's wrestling with extremely complicated feelings for Her Specifically due to the situationship she manipulated him into and moiraine "dying" as a result will be a hell of a lot more sympathetic to 2020s audiences and will allow the genuine tragedy of that moment to come across.

that's really what adaptation in a different time is all about: look at the intended emotional effect of a scene in the original work, and alter the scene as needed in order to inspire the same emotional effect in these different times. because 1990s audiences are different from 2020s audiences and sometimes it takes different methods to give them the same emotional reaction.

as for the maidens, in addition to your reasoning, it'd be super easy to simply say "the maidens are the sub-group among all rand's armies that he feels emotionally closest to, hence their deaths hit him the hardest." there's a really familial relationship that develops there - of course rand would be cut up when members of his Found Family die! there's no reason it needs to be related to the maidens being women. rand's behavior with them would change 0%, it would only be the motive behind that behavior that's different (different and far less annoying, and thus more moving and emotionally impactful).

[noodle-is-unstable]

Hey, just a question but why were you fine with the abusive power dynamics between Sukuna and Uraume (Ume being so devoted to Sukuna and Sukuna only that they killed themself and Sukuna being fine with this blind devotion + Sukuna, a curse/cursed user, making Uraume, a human, cook human meat, including children, for him) so far but the moment he might have met them as a kid/teen you aren't fine? It was a "problematic" ship from the start, idk why everyone is acting horrified that the villains do villain things. But also meeting as a kid and dating as a kid is soooo different, they're both thousands years old in current days so like...

So first of all, you're more than welcome to ask questions and have a discussion but the tone in which this is written is coming off as agressive in my opinion. I don't appreciate that. Perhaps I'm reading into it wrong and that wasn't your intent, but it still has an unnecessary agressive tone to me. Especially in how you chose to end it with "so like..."

I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume I'm misinterpreting the tone because it's very possible I am.

Now onto the actual question.

So unless something happened in the epilogue I missed I don't agree with your assessment of their relationship at all. If this context is given in the epilogue the point is moot because it was still something I wasn't privy to.

So I'm going off the manga for my knowledge of their relationship.

I think it's possible and valid that this is the interpretation you got from this, but it's simply not the same one I have.

I don't see their relationship as an abusive dynamic. (this can change with the new knowledge or context in the epilogue but we're taking about my perspective and why I wrote about it before this)

I saw Uraume as a very loyal servant, but not an abused or manipulated one. I didn't see Sukuna forcing things onto Uraume, I saw them choosing to do these things. (Remember this is in the context where we didn't know how Uraume and Sukuna met). I saw Uraume as choosing to follow Sukuna, choosing to cook humans, choosing to be devoted to Sukuna. They chose to follow him. They chose to be reincarnated to stay by his side. Uraume isn't some innocent little lamb being tricked by a wolf. They killed many people too. Also I think you forget Sukuna was a human too. Sukuna was a human eating humans and Uraume was a human cooking humans. They both participated in fucked up activities. Uraume isn't innocent and being forced to do anything. If they were I doubt they would have worked so hard to bring him back rather than just leaving and living their reincarnated life without him.

Simply put I saw Uraume as a very willing participant in everything that happened. I don't see their dynamic as abusive. You do and you have every right to, but I don't.

I also don't agree with your logic that their villains and do villian things so I should be okay with everything. Stealing is against the law, but so is murder. They're both bad, but they aren't equal. There is so much nuance to situations like this it's not realistic to just make it all equal.

Not to mention there is zero feelings that aren't platonic shown in the manga, that's all headcannons. It's not actually apart of the series at all. This is something fans have put onto the characters. This whole argument is in a fan made concept.

I am uncomfortable with pushing a romantic relationship on them when the situation is that he took Uraume in as a kid. I don't like it, it gives me the ick. So shocking, but if I don't like or agree with something, I'm not going to write about it.

Like I said in my last post I don't give a shit about the argument they're 1000 years old now, I don't like it.

He met Uraume as a child

He helped raise them

I'm not going to push a romantic aspect to that situation

You're allowed to disagree. You're allowed to not have a problem with that dynamic. You're allowed to see their dynamic differently than I do. But at the end of the day this is my page and I'm allowed to decide what I do and don't want to write for. And I don't want to write for that dynamic