#which hopefully if so it’s good and not bad

[catscraftsandcommentary]

Not gonna lie, as a kid, I did NOT realize how much basic algebra and basic geometry would be involved in adulthood. All those word problems that you HATED as a student? They are preparing you to think your way through REAL SITUATIONS.

Real life word problems I have solved (or watched my dad solve, because he's very good at "let me show you how to do this Adult Stuff, so one day you can handle it on your own"):

I am preparing to retile the bathtub/shower in my bathroom. If the area is [measurements] on two walls and [measurements] on the other wall, and the tiles are [measurements] and come [number] in a box, how many boxes do I need? Does this include border tiles, which are [measurements]? Does this include cutting some tiles into two, where I need less than half a tile? How much will this cost? Do I need to keep the receipt to return extra tiles? What other materials do I need to prepare the wall for tiles, and how many of them do I need?

I want to make a cute knit hat. I have picked out a stitch pattern, a yarn type, and the appropriately sized needles. Using these, 5 repeats of the pattern is [measurements] and my head is [measurements]. Also, the border pattern that I want to use is [measurements]. How many repeats do I need to make for the hat to fit around my head? How many rows long should it be to cover the top of my head and down over my ears? When do I start decreasing for the top of the hat (where it goes from a tube to a circle)? Or do I start from the top and keep going until it's the right length? How do I adjust the pattern to account for the increases (top-down construction) or decreases (bottom-up construction) while I'm forming the top of the hat (the circle part)? If the pattern was written for flat knitting (back and forth) and I'm knitting in the round (always start rows on the right), do I need to adjust the pattern for that?

I want to follow a pre-written pattern for a fitted garment, BUT the test swatch I knitted came out the wrong size for the needles I used. Do I change needle sizes or rewrite the pattern [See process above for writing a knitting pattern.] If I change needle sizes, what size should I try next so I hopefully have to knit the fewest test swatches? Do I *like* the way that the pattern looks when I change needle sizes, or are the stitches now so loose that it's worth changing to a thicker yarn (test swatch was too small and bigger needles look bad), a thinner yarn (test patch was too big and smaller needles/tighter needles are hard to work with) or rewriting the pattern?

I am going to build a small wooden ramp for my new shed. What are the relevant local building codes? How long does my ramp need to be to reach from the door of the shed to the ground (which may be sloped) while keeping the appropriate slope? Am I using the gentle slope for handicapped access or the steeper slope for utility access? Is the ramp so long that it needs a level platform in the middle? How much space will this add? How many supports do I need? WHAT KIND AND HOW MUCH LUMBER DO I NEED TO BUY FOR THIS PROJECT? See also: screws, screw bits, support brackets, etc. How much will all this cost?

I want to reorganize my bedroom. What furniture do I have? Am I adding or removing any? What measurements do I need to take so I can make a small model of my room, doors, windows, electrical outlets, etc, and furniture? If I am doing this with graph paper, what scale am I using for "inches to graph squares" and what size does everything need to be? When I'm ready to move everything, what order do I move the furniture so that my largest pieces don't get trapped somewhere awkward?

If I also want to PAINT my bedroom at the same time, how do I move furniture so that I can reach the walls while doing the least rearrangement for heavy pieces? Do I have space in other rooms to temporarily move things out of my way, or do I have to keep most stuff in my room the whole time? How much stuff can I declutter and get rid of before I start?

I want to start a new embroidery project. What materials will I be using, and how much of each will I need? Can I use the things I already have in my Craft Stash, or do I need to make a run to the craft store? How big will the finished project be? Do I want to frame it (this will require extra fabric around the edges for mounting, plus the framing materials) or sew it on something as a patch (this will require a seam allowance and possibly backing fabric for the patch, like stabilizer) or embroider an existing item? What new techniques or skills do I need to look up and learn before I start?

I want to put organizing bins in my pantry cabinet. The shelves are [measurements]. Many of the cans and boxes that I want to organize are [measurements]. Of the organizers available, what size should I look for and how many will I need? Do I want everything one size, or do I want some larger or smaller for different things that I'm storing? How much extra effort will it take to set up and maintain this system, and am I willing to invest that effort - not just at the start, but as an on-going basis?

At work, we keep track of how much product we produce, the materials we use, and the waste that we had. (This helps for tracking "what does it cost to produce each item, including labor" which is important for budgeting. Unfortunately if management is obsessed with maximizing profits NO MATTER WHAT, this can lead to process changes that are REALLY ANNOYING.) If I have 5 rows of boxes plus 3 extra boxes on a pallet, and each box holds 12 items and each row holds 7 boxes, how many finished items are on the pallet? If I have 2 finished pallets (12 items per box, 7 boxes per row, 16 rows per pallet) PLUS that partial pallet at the end of the shift, how many items did we make that shift? If we threw away 68 lbs of material during the shift and there are 3.36 items per lb of material, how many item's worth of material did we throw away? What was our percentage of waste for the shift? (These ARE realistic numbers!) How much total material did we use during that shift, and when will we need to order more? If there are three production lines on the shift, all making different items and using different materials, how do we track everything? Are there any changes that management can make to make production more efficient? (More product produced, less materials and time wasted, less machine downtime for mechanical or user error problems.) How likely are those changes to drive experienced workers away, and is the cost of finding, hiring, and training new employees to a similar level of skill so high that we should NOT make those changes?

Word problems are EVERYWHERE when you're an adult, and half the trick of solving them is recognizing that they exist, and then figuring out what questions you need to ask to solve them, and what info you need to answer your questions.

One thing they don’t tell you about sewing is that it is actually ironing

[esotericbluntbaby]

HIIIII i love your writing style so bad, i came on here to request something and then i see you doubt your own writing which is crazy cuz they're all good!!! can i request hamzah and reader in something worse than a situationship so she brings out like someone attractive along at a party or something (it could literally be a gay man that offered to help her idk) to see if it'd make him jealous and it actually does. IM SORRY if you get too mant jealous hamzah requests but i just yearn for him, PLS have angst in the beginning 😭😭🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼.

worsened aches

hamzahthefantastic x reader

description: though toxic and envious, you realize that your situationship had to have gone through the worst in order to better itself for the sake of you and hamzah.

mentions: angst (expect it at this point), yearning, posessiveness, toxicity in a situationship out of confusion, she/her pronouns, both hamzah and reader are equally mean to each other so hopefully it cancels out, a guy making you uncomfortable and grabbing your hand, a fight scene, happy ending, sfw for the most part

listen to partynextdoor while you're reading lol. specifically make it to the morning or resentment but honestly any will do <3

--

"you're literally fucking crazy- what are you talking about?"

you and hamzah were currently going at it like two players on rival teams. though your relationship, or lack there of, was toxic and overly complicated, you both stayed in the same rooms you fought in because of the loneliness that consumed the both of you. obviously, arguing wasn't fun, nor was it ethical for the sake of your mental health, yet, bickering with someone else was somehow better than spending your nights alone and depressed.

you met hamzah because of how loud he was. you were, and still are, his neighbor who moved in a couple months ago. getting annoyed of the lack of sleep, you decided to march over to his apartment in the same manner that the guardsmen stomp in front of the royal palace; they had the queen to defend, while you had your sanity to fight for. over time, the friendship and simultaneous rivalry stemmed from that night and bloomed into the situationship you have right now.

you and hamzah technically aren't anything; technically, you and hamzah are nothing more than just friends who occasionally act coupley to fill the voids that call you to jump out of windows and balconies. you both were lonely, creating a seemingly win-win situation. he comes over whenever he needs someone to cuddle at night, or more than cuddle, and vice versa. it's been a system that's worked out for about eight-ish months now.

as all situationships do, it was bound to crash and tumble like hurricanes over the ocean. over time, the lack of a label caused more problems than einstein could sold. neither of you had a complete understanding of the boundaries you each wanted, nor did either of you want to risk creating a more serious problem than what it seemed to be by talking about it. so, over time, resentment built itself up within the foundations of the connection between the both of you as communication began to settle in the roots of the ground it was built on.

the night started alright; it was simple making out, occasional pecks on the cheeks and forehead, and constant physical touch. he even bought you food and fed it to you while you two sat on the couch and watched comfort movies. your presence was enjoyed as much as his was. it was normal that whenever hamzah was over, you'd completely lose sight of the bad parts of the connection you have after any part of him would touch you. however, the mood quickly changed when hamzah answered the call of another girl while on your couch. watching his smile expand at her words as you were cuddled up right beside him caused a pit to grow within your chest. it felt wrong. technically, given that you two were friends, it wasn't; however, the fact that he was all over you two seconds before you both heard the ringtone was, in fact, wrong. you moved away, distancing mountains and seas between you two on his couch, as eventually the call became silent and he hung up. you wouldn't speak to him. growing annoyed, he forced you to speak, to which you called him an asshole for "damn near flirting with a girl in front of you." thus, his gaslighting begun.

"hamzah, what do you mean, 'what's wrong with me?' what's wrong with you?"

he scoffed, "fucking nothing. nothing even happened- i have no clue what you're talking about. why are you making something out of nothing?"

"that's so fucking mature. you told me to talk, didn't you? or did i just make something out of nothing again?"

"oh my god, that's not what i meant- dude, why are you even mad? it's not like i did anything."

you raised your eyebrows, "my head was literally on your lap while you were flirting with her."

he slowly emphasized his words, "i wasn't even flirting with her."

"you made your voice deep like you were fuckin' neil degrasse tyson, are you joking? and what the hell was she saying that was making you laugh that hard?"

he put his hands up in defense, "it's not a big deal. so what if jess called me and i laughed when she told me a fuckin joke? it's not that deep."

your body felt like it was rising in temperature, "you're actually such a liar- we both know that it was that deep, bro. that's literally how you laugh with me."

"why does it matter if that's how i laugh with you?" he made a noise between a laugh and scoff and looked back at the television, "it's not like we're dating."

he was right. you weren't dating, so you can't be upset. you knew you mostly wanted that reassurance that he wouldn't find someone else while messing with you on the side, though you assumed that hamzah wasn't like that. you've had the run down of a bad dating history and horrible ex's and, yeah, hamzah was kind of bad. however, hamzah was bad in a way where at least it was to your face, unlike the infidelity and lies in your past relationships. unlike them, the worst that hamzah would do was get defensive over an argument or say something that was a little too mean on accident because he was genuinely just speaking his mind. honestly, the touch and treatment he gave you during the times you weren't bitchy towards each other evened out the slight toxicity; actually, even surpassing it. however, this was too far. this was a lie and you knew it. it was a lie that he specifically told to hurt you on purpose.

sure, maybe you could've gone a different direction with confronting him and maybe you were too aggressive with your accusations; but at the same time, you were also hurt that he would do that in front of you, as your head rested a couple of inches away from his heartbeat. the intimacy of the setting the both of you were in was overtaken by a green bogeyman; envy in its personified form.

the room fell silent as he kept on watching the movie. he only looked at you when you sniffled from tearing up so much. you guys have argued in the past, but never have you cried in front of him; this was vulnerability that you allowed to seep through you like sunlight seeps through the roots of a plant.

his attention was now fully on you, "are you crying?"

"hamzah, i want you to get out of my place."

"wait-"

you stood up and began to walk through the door, "let yourself out the door and don't come back. i'm done."

--

three weeks without him had passed and you were an emotional wreck; a wreck that was so bad that other cars on the road had to stop to see it for themselves. throughout the stages of grief, you were currently on the acceptance stage. you hadn't left you apartment ever since that night out of fear that he'd be leaving his, next door. a couple of times, you heard the knock that you two made for each other to signify that it was the other person at the door. with each knuckle to the wood, a pang in your heart thumped harder and with more rigor. luckily, it only lasted a total of a week before he stopped coming over.

since any romantic encounter or even simple things around your house reminded you of the man next door, you were going to continue to rot in bed whilst watching horror movies. however, the plan was quickly changed when rey, the gay man you met at a club a couple of months ago, decided to text you.

rey :p

5:42 pm | hey boo

5:42 pm | i haven't talked to you in forever

5:42 pm | how r u?

you

5:43 pm | im horrible

5:43 pm | u rmbr the guy i used to talk to u about

rey :p

5:44 pm | the one that was ur bf but also not ur bf?

5:44 pm | like the one that u showed me a pic of and i said he had the same eyes as central cee

you

5:44 pm | yeah

rey :p

5:44 pm | what'd the bitch do

you

5:45 pm | he was genuinely being an asshole

5:45 pm | he literally picked up the phone right

rey :p

5:45 pm | mhmmm

you

5:46 pm | it was a girl

5:46 pm | i was laying my head down on his lap

5:46 pm | and i guess she was the funniest person in the world or smth bc he was laughing his ass off like a fucking idiot

rey :p

5:46 pm | bro hell no

5:46 pm | r u serious

5:47 pm | r u okay

you

5:47 pm | bedrotting lowk lol

5:47 pm | haven't gotten out of my bed in like a full three days

5:48 pm | idk i guess i js miss him

rey :p

5:48 pm | it's reasonable

5:48 pm | im going to a party tn

5:48 pm | come with meeeeee

5:48 pm | maybe u just need a distraction

you

5:49 pm | idk rey

rey :p

5:50 pm | go get dressed and pls shower dont be stinky

5:50 pm | ill pick u up at like uhhhh 8ish

you

5:50 pm | fine

--

you were two drinks down when rey was only tipsy from one drink. being the designated driver, he didn't want to overdo it; yet, he reassured you that he'd take care of you throughout the night. you were simply enjoying his presence; however, given that it was his friends' party that he was going to, occasionally you were left by yourself leaning on walls or sitting on couches and getting up when a couple started to make out on the leather right next to you. after a while, you began to regret going; the more you were alone, the more you thought about how hamzah would be towering over you like some sort of bodyguard in order to make sure that nobody spiked your drink.

as you were zoned out and thinking about him once again, you suddenly came into focus when rey went up to you and gave you a side hug. confused, your eyebrows furrowed as you looked up at him.

"are you thinking about him again?" rey asked, taking another sip of his seltzer.

you sighed, "is it that obvious?"

"if you wanna go home, i can take you. i'm sorry if i pushed you too hard to go out- i just didn't want you to stay home crying over some boy."

"no, yea, i get it. thank you, really, maybe i just needed to go outside. are you ready to go home?"

"i was just gonna drop you off and come back."

you didn't want to seem like a burden; rey was only trying to help you with coping. to have to drive a whole thirty minutes just to drop you off and come back seemed like too much to ask for; after everything that happened with hamzah when it came to begging for communication and reassurance, you hated seeming like you had too much to ask for. so, you took a deep breath and began to brave the waters even more; this was new territory for you that you were now forcing yourself to become familiar with for the rest of the night.

"no, it's okay. i'll stay- i kinda don't wanna be alone," you half-lied.

he put his hand on your shoulder reassuringly, "are you sure?"

"yeah," you sipped the vodka cranberry out of your red solo cup, "i'm sure.

"well," he began to give you a hug with his back facing the front entrance, "if you do wanna leave, tell me."

you hugged him back, "i will. thanks, rey."

unwrapping his arms from you, he walked in the direction of the party as you still stood near the entrance. however, you soon realized that his body was blocking the very sight you tried your best to avoid; hamzah was standing right in front of the doorway, dressed in one of the outfits that made you weak. standing with his friends, his hard expression fixated on you as he realized that some other guy was on you the way that he was. you locked eye contact, sensing the tense gaze he scorned towards you. you decided that it was time to go to the bathroom.

--

sitting on the cold tile for about twenty minutes helped ground you to the reality of your situation. you came to this party hoping to escape the emotions that he made you feel after basking and bathing in them for the past three weeks, however, the same guy appeared right in front of you at the worst time possible. you could go one of two ways: go bother rey and make him drive thirty minutes to and back from your house just to drop you off, or to stay in the bathroom.

considering that someone knocked on the bathroom door as you were pondering, you decided to choose neither of the options and chose a secret, third one: to stay so that rey can enjoy his night.

leaving the bathroom into a relatively empty hallway, you felt an odd stare as you walked past a tall man holding a beer in his hand. you heard and felt his heavy footsteps right behind you, trailing after you in the dark area. you started to walk quicker towards the end of the hallway, reaching the entrance to it that led to the living room where a couple of groups of people were.

"where are you going, pretty lady?" you heard from behind you.

you ignored him, finding his remarks uncomfortable and weird.

you felt his breath on your neck, "y'know, it's rude to ignore a man who's interested in you."

"leave me alone," you sternly demanded.

"what, are you a fucking prude or something?" he asked, grabbing your wrist.

"what the fuck? let go of me, now," you warned as his grip on you tightened, causing your heart to drop all the way to your bladder.

suddenly, he was being pulled off of you and pounded into by someone's fists so fast that it could possibly beat the speed of light; you could tell by the way that the figure punched that it was hamzah. you didn't even see him in the room before he was on the floor with the man from the hallway. you stood there, motionless with worry for hamzah's physical being, as people attempted to intervene and pull hamzah off of him. you watched as hamzah was pried off of him by martin, scolding him and asking him what he was doing. luckily, the man simply left the area and hamzah went into the bathroom, alone.

luckily, the room went back to the usual conversations relatively quick, since it lasted a couple of punches thrown in by hamzah; in addition, a couple of people were staring at you as you yelled at him to let go of your arm. you didn't know how to feel. what if he didn't get him off of you? would you have gotten assaulted? or even worse? however, those thoughts also simultaneously existed with thoughts of how hamzah got there so quick and why he just pummeled a guy into the floor, even after you two weren't on good terms. nevertheless, you went against your goal of avoiding anything hamzah-related and walked to the bathroom.

knocking on the door, he took a minute to turn the knob. he saw you in front of him and gazed at you with an expression that you haven't seen on him before; a mixture of everything felt tonight and, possibly, for the past three weeks. you got a good look at how his eyebags were more protruded as if the skin had a second layer. his eyebags mixed with the lilac and ruby shades mixed in led you to believe that he was struggling to sleep; it was as if you were looking at a mirror.

"can i come in?" you asked.

though you realize that this is stunting your ability to heal, his voice was comforting, "yeah, sure."

he sat down on the closed toilet, as you sat down on the rim of the bathtub besides it. he stared at his hand, bruises and redness already forming on his knuckles, as well as an open gash on his ring finger. you got up from the bathtub rim and crouched over to the cabinet below the sink, watching his eyes linger onto you as you searched for something to clean out his would and wrap it. taking out a roll of bandage and wound cleaner, you sat back down. you gently took his hand in yours and began to clean his wound.

"this might hurt," you mumbled.

you squeezed the wound cleaner as he winced, a sour expression with his eyebrows scrunched on his face apparent. you began to wrap his hand, trying your best to be as gentle as possible. you still felt his eyes on you, like you were a puppet performing in front of an audience.

you broke the silence, "are you drunk?"

"what?"

"y'know, have you drank anything since you got here."

"oh- no, no i haven't."

you ripped the end of the bandage off, attempting to tie it onto his hand, "so, you beat his ass completely sober?"

he chuckled, "yeah."

"it was stupid."

he gave you a look of disbelief, "what?"

"hamzah, you could've hurt yourself! what if he had a knife on him or a gun or just something-"

"you're telling me that i'm stupid for getting a guy, who was clearly making you uncomfortable, off of you?"

you sighed, "no, hamzah, you're not stupid. i'm saying that your actions were stupid because you could've gotten seriously hurt and i don't want to be the reason you're in the hospital. i don't want you to get hurt at all."

"well, would he have done it?"

puzzled, you tilted your head to the side, "who?"

"the- fuckin- the guy you were with- him- would he have done this for you?"

a chuckle of disbelief escaped from your throat, "why does that matter?"

"i saw him hugging you and shit, he should've done what i did- where was he when you needed him? why'd he let you go to the bathroom by yourself?"

"why does it matter if he was hugging me, hamzah? why does it matter if he left me alone?"

"because if you're gonna replace me with him, he has to be better than me!" his voice got slightly louder, causing you to jump, "fuck- if we're not together anymore, you have to find someone that could take care of you as well as i did or even better."

your eyes squinted with annoyance, "hamzah, you literally just said that we were just friends. what are you talking about 'we're not together anymore?' you were the one who said that we weren't ever together."

"i fucking lied, okay? i lied. i fucking lied to you because i can't handle the fact that you wanted more and i- i just- i can't be enough for you," he rushed as the information in his head that he wanted to let out was twice as fast as his words, "i wanted more too. fuck, i wanted more so fucking bad- you don't get it, but i'd be selfish if i just took you all for myself even if i couldn't give you everything that you deserve."

emotions began to implode within your chest, "are you serious? you could've fucking tried or, better yet, you could've just talked to me, hamzah! genuinely, what the hell are you even talking about with that 'i couldn't give you everything' shit. i don't want everything, i just wanted you."

your breathing became heavier as tears began to flow out of your eyes once more, mirroring the scene at your apartment that lead to this very encounter. though you laid in bed for three weeks, you didn't cry once, not ever since the time you last cried in front of him. every single fear was running rampant in your head from speaking to him with such vulnerability. yet, you soon realized that there was no point of holding back. he was already watching you intently and listening to every single word you were saying, gazing at you with longing eyes that yearned the longer you were sat in the bathroom. there was no turning back now, so you decided to tell him everything that you've been feeling and thinking in the past three weeks of agonizing heartbreak with one, singular sentence. with breaths heavy within your chest and tears now streaming down your face, you let go.

"hamzah, i just want you."

in that moment, hamzah saw the heartbreak in personified, human form. he watched you crumple apart in front of him like balls of paper about to be thrown into a trash can. hamzah went into the situationship with the thought that it would be the best possible outcome; the outcome where there's no mess to clean up, nor promises to keep, nor expectations to maintain. the situationship was, in his eyes, a way to keep you both from being hurt. knowing that his very intention was to not hurt you at all, as he watched you crying your eyes out in front of him, finally caused the the realization that he was supporting the very cause he was against.

hamzah didn't know what to do, yet, he knew he had to make this right for the sake of you, him, and the connection between you two.

hamzah lifted you up onto his lap, unsure and hesitant, watching your reaction to his actions. watching the tears on your face slowly stop sliding down and your breathing get slightly lighter, he believed it was okay. he wiped your face with his thumbs with such gentleness to it; in hamzah's mind, he has broken you down to the point where there's cracks in your skin, so he was trying his best not to shatter you completely. after gazing at your eyes with a sympathetic, longing, and apologetic stare, he gently brought your face closer towards his. he closed the gap between you guys' lips, a wave of nostalgia and comfort overtaking the vulnerability that was just in the room. over time, the kiss got more desperate and aching. your lips chased after each other as your tongues moves synchronously with the same feelings of past despair and hopelessness. your hands were roaming up and down each other's bodies as if it was meant to be explored by each other; as if you were both artifacts meant to be excavated. it lasted fifteen minutes; the passion radiated from you guys' bodies even after you stopped kissing to breathe. hamzah was the first to speak.

"i know you came here with a date, but i can't take it anymore. i need you in my life, baby, i need you back and i need you back now. the past couple weeks i haven't been sleeping or eating or doing anything besides just sitting there and realizing that i'm a fucking idiot. i never liked the girl that i was on the phone with and i blocked her right after i left your place, that night. i don't even know what i was doing and i shouldn't have even picked up in the first place- i should have never said we were just friends. i was lying. i was a fucking liar and you can do whatever you want to make me pay for that. you can slap me as hard as you can or burn my hoodies or anything, baby, just-please forgive me, i'm sorry. i'll do anything to have you back in my life-"

you cut him off with a slow, gentle, and lingering kiss, once again. pulling away, he admired you like he was in a trance that he wasn't willing to be broken out of.

"i'm not dating rey. he's here with another guy."

hamzah looked puzzled as he rubbed loving circles onto your thighs, "what?"

"he's gay."

"thank fucking god," he let out a sigh of relief, "i think i felt my heart genuinely shatter when i walked in on him hugging you."

you laughed, "you were that hurt over it?"

"of course i'd be. it's you."

"yeah, yeah, don't flatter me," you teased.

hamzah's expressione turned serious once again, "baby, please come back to me. i'll make it all up to you if you let me, i promise. i don't care how long it takes or what i'll have to do. let me prove to you that i can take care of you."

your expression also became serious, "it depends. are you taking care of me as my idiot neighbor who occasionally comes over to do things that friends don't do?"

you asked the question expecting him to answer that he'll do better than that, however, he surprised you once again.

he took your hand and kissed it, "no, i'll take care of you as your boyfriend, if you'll let me."

--

authors note!

hi guys this is so late i am going to bed goodnight!

[dior-luxury]

hiiiya can u write like kiyora jin confessing and how that would go👾plss♡

𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐠𝐲 𝐓𝐨 𝐆𝐞𝐭 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐓𝐨 𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐦 𝐏𝐭.𝟐

( ✧ ) ────── 𝐛𝐨𝐲𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧���� 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 . 𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐚 - 𝐬𝐡𝐞/𝐡𝐞𝐫 .

- [𝐜𝐡.] kiyora jin . aiku oliver . bachira meguru . yo hiori . michael kaiser - [𝐩:𝐬] high school au . subtle jealousy . sfw

𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞: Thank you so much for the prompt! >_< I also added more characters of my choice, im glad you guys enjoy this series! Also it's my first time EVER writing for Michael so hopefully it's not that bad :")... don't hurt me stans!!!

Jin Kiyora

Jin is the kind of person who prefers to observe from the sidelines rather than actively engage with others. Instead of approaching you directly to introduce himself or strike up a conversation, he tends to rely on chance encounters and the flow of fate to guide his interactions.

If he were ever to muster the confidence to say "hi," it would likely take him a whole year just to work up the nerve to make that initial connection.

Once you and Jin begin conversing, you'll notice that he is genuinely attentive to the details of your interests and preferences. He listens closely to the things you mention, making mental notes of what brings you joy.

During the classes you both shared, he would secretly steal glances at you, sketching small, detailed drawings. After class, he would carefully fold each drawing and slip it into your locker, tucked among your books.

On special occasions—like your birthday or holidays—he would surprise you with thoughtfully chosen gifts that reflect your tastes, demonstrating his effort to make you feel appreciated and valued.

Jin's competitive nature also shines through in his interactions with you. If he sees anyone else trying to impress you in a way that rivals his own efforts, he would perceive it as a challenge or a competition.

This drive to stand out and be the one to "wow" you fuels his determination to ensure that you notice him and appreciate what he brings to the table.

"Not that sure you'll accept but... you seem cool. We should date."

Oliver Aiku

Oliver, despite his pattern of frequently ending relationships, has developed an interest in someone. He is known to engage with a new partner almost daily, which suggests a difficulty in committing to a single person.

However, should he form a genuine attraction towards you, his intentions would likely be very apparent.

Oliver's approach to expressing his interest would involve a series of pronounced flirting behaviors.

This might include asking for your phone number, which serves as a means of establishing a direct line of communication, as well as inquiring about your personal plans and activities, reflecting a desire to know more about your life.

He may feel compelled to share various topics of conversation that he finds engaging, seeking to deepen your connection.

Furthermore, Oliver is likely to propose a variety of outings or social engagements, often framing them as casual and lighthearted.

He might characterize these invitations as opportunities to spend time together “just for fun,” rather than presenting them as traditional romantic dates.

This approach reflects both his playful demeanor and perhaps a reluctance to fully acknowledge the romantic nature of his intentions.

He is the kind of person who surprises you with thoughtful gifts seemingly out of the blue, all while maintaining an air of casual indifference.

When you express your gratitude, he waves it off, insisting that he's merely performing a "good deed" and that there's nothing special about it.

Oliver is determined to make a positive impression on you during physical education class.

He hopes that his hard work and commitment will stand out and earn your praise.

His nonchalance contrasts with the genuine thought and effort he puts into selecting gifts, leaving you to wonder whether he fully understands the impact of his gestures.

"Hey Ba- I mean, Y/N! I got you flowers~ Hopefully you're not allergic."

Meguru Bachira

If Bachira found himself harboring a crush on you, it would become glaringly obvious to everyone around him, even if he attempted to disguise his feelings.

The moment you entered the room, a subtle shift would occur; his facade of calm would crack, revealing the flustered state beneath.

His cheeks would flush a vivid shade of pink, spreading warmth to the tips of his ears—a telltale sign of his embarrassment and affection.

In contrast to his casual demeanor with others, Bachira would be hyper-aware of your presence. His eyes would seek you out, locking onto yours with an intensity that lingered far longer than what was necessary.

That shared gaze would speak volumes, conveying unspoken emotions and a longing that transcended mere words, as if he were silently confessing his feelings through the depths of his eyes.

Whenever you crossed paths, Bachira would eagerly seize the moment, keen to engage you in conversation. His topics would vary widely, encompassing everything from light-hearted banter to profound discussions that sparked deeper connections.

Each interaction would feel electric, filled with an eagerness to both learn more about you and to share in joyful exchanges of laughter and insight.

It would become increasingly clear that you occupied a special place in his thoughts—his interest driving him to volunteer for conversations at every opportunity, making it abundantly evident that you had captured his attention in a way that no one else ever could.

"Hey Y/N! Wanna go hang out this weekend?~"

Hiori Yo

Hiori possesses a remarkable ability to enchant those around him with his steadfast reliability and captivating charm.

Though he carries a naturally shy demeanor, he consistently makes a valiant effort to push through his reservations, much like the spirited Bachira, in hopes of leaving a lasting positive impression on you.

His genuine excitement about spending time together is palpable. Hiori often takes the initiative to invite you out, eagerly proposing a variety of enjoyable activities that allow you both to connect over shared interests.

Whether it’s engaging in thrilling video game battles or exploring new hobbies, these moments not only spark a refreshing sense of friendly competition but also provide a safe space for him to unveil his true personality amidst a relaxed atmosphere.

What truly sets Hiori apart is his deep awareness of his feelings for you.

He is committed to ensuring that you fully recognize the significance he places on your connection, going out of his way to communicate openly and transparently.

This thoughtful approach of his is not merely about expressing affection; it’s about nurturing a sense of security in the budding relationship you both are cultivating.

Although he doesn't put on a show to win your admiration, he always goes out of his way to assist you with your schoolwork whenever you need a helping hand.

With every conversation, he reinforces the message that he genuinely cares, striving to make you feel cherished and understood.

"Y/N-san... would you like to be my girlfriend?"

Michael Kaiser

Michael is anything but shy; in fact, he exudes a confident energy that draws people in. He has a playful spark in his eye that suggests he’s always ready for a challenge.

When it comes to pursuing something—or someone—he wants, hesitation is not in his repertoire. Right now, his focus is squarely on you.

Whenever an opportunity arises to strike up a conversation, whether during lectures or casual moments in the hallways, Michael seizes it without a second thought.

He has a knack for making those interactions feel effortless and engaging, effortlessly navigating between topics to keep you intrigued.

In class, he doesn’t shy away from sitting next to you, claiming the seat with an air of casual authority.

His presence is undeniable as he subtly glances at the person who is meant to be beside you, a cheeky challenge in his eyes that warns them to keep their distance.

Michael is well aware that they wouldn’t dare disrupt his plans.

His game plan revolves around charming you with his smooth talk and playful banter, aiming to win you over with both confidence and charisma.

Whether it's a well-timed compliment or a joke that makes you laugh, he’s intent on capturing your attention and affection, determined to show you just how special you are to him.

"You free after school? No? Too bad, you are now. And we're going on a date."

[alwaysobsessed777]

okok so for the nika angst how about it’s something with her injury and reader trying to help her and it’s appreciated but nika feels helpless since reader helps with everything and nika starts closing herself off ??

idk something like that 🤷‍♀️

FINE LINE - N.M

finally finished this one after the long day I had (which was literally just shopping and watching the UConn game). So please...enjoyyy and hopefully it's not to bad.

Not sure the word count but there is no warnings!!

"hey, Niks. I'm gonna head to work, um, do you need anything before I go?" A simple question. Nothing that could be taken the wrong way.

"Nope."

"Okay...I'll pick something up for us to eat on my way home, if you want me too."

"Sounds good."

My lips form a thin line, "Okay, just text me something you'd want. I love you."

"Love you."

I didn't want to think to much into it, but since nika's injury, I've tried my best to be the supportive girlfriend who stays by her side. But something just seems off with her anymore. I don't know if it's just the fact that's she's injured that keeps her down...or if I'm smothering her with my presence.

I made my way to work, helping the Seattle storm players stay up on workouts and anything else they needed. Quickly, I finished whatever paperwork was thrown at me. At this point, the job had lost its charm. Everything felt broken. Between the players, the staff, everything was finally falling apart...and I had no control over it.

"You good there?" Jewell's voice broke through whatever had been brewing in my mind.

"I guess," rummaging through the file I had been trying to sort, something to keep my mind off everything else. Which, clearly wasn't working.

The woman moved her way to the desk, leaning against it, "you don't sound so sure."

"I'm not."

The teasing seemed to dissipate once those two words left my mouth. "Y/n, is everything good? If you needa talk, the teams right here."

"I...I don't know. Everything seems to be falling apart." Jewell titled her head, as if to tell me to keep going.

"The team is falling apart. Whether it's the staff or it's the players. Then there was nika's injury...and I feel like I'm losing her. She barely talks to me, I can't tell if I'm doing to much or not enough." I hadn't even realized the tears that started to fall, Jewell coming up to me to hold my hands, "I just feel like everything is slowly freeing itself from my grasp...and I can't do anything about it but watch. Watch the team start to hate each other. Watch everyone I work with rip each other's throats out cause there's no way for communication. And...and then watch my girlfriend fall deeper into whatever mental crisis she's going through until there's no way of getting her back." The sobs were uncontrollable. I hadn't realized how much I needed to talk to someone. I was so focused on everyone else. I forgot about myself, the one thing that was supposed to matter the most I let slip the furthest away from me.

"Hey, y/n, just take the rest of the day off," I went to argue, but Jewell just shook off my response, "don't worry about the team, don't worry about anyone in this building...other than you."

"I can't just leave."

"I'll talk to someone, explain what's going on. They'll understand, everyone needs a mental health day every once in awhile," The woman's soft smile sent a wave of comfort over me. The first feeling of comfort I've had in awhile, "and about Nika...I'm sure she's dealing with a lot. Going through an injury like an ACL tear, it takes a toll on every aspect of your life. Now I'm not giving her a reason to shut you out...but give her just a little bit of leeway."

I nod, fighting the urge to crash into her and just hug her....which goes right out the window the second she opens her arms inviting me in. Without a second thought, I bury my face in her shoulder, trying to take the comfort the woman was offering.

"How do I even talk to Nika? I've tried...nothing seems to bring her back to me...." Had I tried hard enough? Was it really my fault for her drifting away from me?

"Like I said, I'm sure there's a lot going on in that thick head of hers," a small chuckle escaped my lips, "but I'm sure she'll have a reason that made sense to her on why she was pushing you away. And please, if it's extremely stupid...let me know and I'll prove her how stupid that move was."

A smile spreads across my lips, "thanks Jewells...I needed this."

"I know...you looked like you were gonna throw this desk at me when I walked in."

"Whatever...I'm gonna go talk to Nika. I just need to know she's okay."

Jewell seemed to soften even more, "Nika is gonna be okay. Now or even a month away from now...she's gonna be okay."

"Thank you," she pulled me into another hug, letting me go, allowing me to make my way back to the apartment my girlfriend and I shared. The small place we've started to call home after just a couple months. Meeting about a year ago at UConn, the giant campus somehow leading to us meeting each other at one of the many cafes that were scattered throughout it. The way I had finished my studies for physical therapy and she had just finished her last year on the basketball team. I had been praying to get a job for Seattle storm since I was little, not being able to play but hoping to help the people who did. Then, Nika got drafted, sending her straight my way. We got close over her training camp days, which lead to her making the team, to her needing a place. I just happened to overhear and offered her a spot in my apartment. Little did I know she'd end up being my girlfriend a month later.

But here I was today...reminiscing the last couple months like our relationship was in the past. A sudden wash of dread spread throughout me, stopping me from getting out of my car as I sat in front of the apartment. I almost had to bribe myself with the fact that if I got everything out now, it'd all be fixed later.

Opening the door to the small place left me sick, walking up the stairs to our shared room was even worse. I stood in front of the closed door, quiet sounds floated around from the TV. I knocked a couple times; no answer. I opened the door slowly, catching Nika sitting upright - hair down, hood over her head, covers pulled up to her chin - a dead stare right at the TV. Not even a little acknowledgement of me being her.

"Hey," it came out rough, hoarse. My nerves became uneasy. Knocking her head to the side, her eyes fell on mine, but it lasted no more than a second. "Can we talk?"

Nika tensed, "about what?"

I made my way to the bed, sitting beside the girl, "Us."

"Us?" Her head snapped in my direction. A wash of worry or nervousness flooded her face.

"Yeah," fidgeting with my hands, I continued, "Are you not happy...like...in our relationship? Am I being to much? Or maybe I'm not enough for you? Maybe I wasn't able to help you like I thought I would? I don't know, I probably shouldn't have brought you back here, to Seattle, when you could've just went back hom-"

Nika's hands made contact with mine, her body moved to be faced towards me. "Are you unhappy?"

"...I...I don't know."

Nika's eyes widened, shock, worry, nervousness, anything and everything seemed to hit her like a truck in that very moment. "Y/n...I'm sorry...maybe we should end things."

Tears swelled in my eyes, this wasn't anything that I was expecting. "You wanna break it off?"

"I...I don't know," the girl started, staring off at the small contact that we were making, "maybe it'll be better for you. You could live your life without worrying about me 24/7. Maybe you'll find more time to be with your friends instead of stuck in bed with me. Maybe you'll start to love your job again without having to worry if I'm upset that you get to work and I don't. Maybe you'll be able to actually live your life without having to worry about the disappointment you come home to everyday. Maybe you'll be able to find someone who will be able to treat you the way you're supposed to be treated. I love you too much to keep you stuck in the house with me. I love you so much I need to let you have a life, not for you to only care about mine."

Tears fell from her cheeks, sobs erupted out of me. The stress and hurt of Nika's words hitting me harder than anything else ever has. "Nika...I love you...I don't want anything but you."

Nika shook her head, "no...I'm a burden on you...I can't hold you down anymore."

"Nika...please...I can't live without you. I would do anything for you...even if it's ruining my life, I would ruin my life over and over again before I let you go." The brunette couldn't keep eye contact. Anything was better than looking at me at this moment. "Nika, I'm not letting you break us up."

"Why? I can't be the girlfriend you deserve. I'm stuck here...and you just get stuck with me."

"I wouldn't want it any other way, Niks."

Her eyes fell on mine, "I just don't understand...I can't even stand myself right now."

"And I will always be able to stand you... I'll do more than just 'stand' you, Nika, I'm always gonna love you." Her eyes fell again, she pulled me into her. A hug. The first one she's initiated in awhile.

"I'm sorry," her voice breaking, "I...I just want you to be happy."

"I'm always happy...but that's only because I'm with you, Nika."

She let out a soft chuckle, "I don't know what I'd do without you, y/n/n."

A smile, small, but still a smile stretched across my face, "I don't know what you'd do either."

She moved to look me in the face, "you're the only thing that's getting me through this injury...I hope you know that."

"I'm just glad to hear I'm helping you at all," I take her hand in mine, a soft spark ignited between us.

"I know I haven't said it to you-"

"you haven't really said much in awhile."

Her face softened more, "I know, and I'm sorry about that, but I just want to let you know... you're more than enough for me. Over the last couple weeks...I had this feeling that I was becoming a burden on you...and I thought if I separated myself from you, you'd finally realize I wasn't enough for you."

"Nika..."

"Y/n...I want nothing more than you in my life, always and forever."

"And you'll get that...cause I'm not going anywhere." A easy quiet settled between us, she moved to lay in my arms while I rubbed gently on her arm. Her breaths seemed to fall into a steady pace, a pattern. She fell asleep...in my arms...but things just felt easier. A weight lifted off my shoulder, and I'm sure it was the same for her.

I placed a soft kiss on her head, settling my head on hers. Drifting away to sleep that was almost inevitable, I whispered three words, "I love you." Those three words I would never go without telling the woman in my arms. I wanted her to know I meant them ...even in her worst moments.

A/n hopefully this is to your liking (the person who requested this) and it was more angsty than what I usually write.

[thebibliosphere]

I can’t find my migraine journal so you’re getting my notes because I’ll forget to check my notes app before my appointment tomorrow, but I always open Tumblr so:

Migraine only lasted 14 hours instead of average 27.

Nerve pain also didn’t build beyond maybe a seven? (Usual is a solid 10) Odd for an ovulation migraines but I’ll take it.

It also didn’t oscillate rapidly along the occipital pathway. It just jumped between my eyebrow and the base of my skull without affecting the rest of the nerve, which was weird but good because it’s the rapid cycling along the occipital pathway that triggers the uncontrollable vomiting that keeps landing me in hospital because it makes my collarbone dislocate 👍

I was able to sleep through a good chunk of it. Normally the pain and the nerve burning makes it impossible, but the nerve burning was minimal and I was able to doze all be it a bit fitfully.

Pain didn’t reach where the needles were inserted on Monday and Thursday. It felt like the lack of tension in the area was making it harder for the pain to spread.

Occipital pathway is currently not tender to the touch. Touch usually can’t be tolerated for up to 48 hours after migraine event. Promising.

Base of skull does hurt. Radiating through to jaw. Probably clenching in my sleep? Neck feels clicky too, but not about to subluxate. Hopefully.

Ears hurt where the needles have been going in but it’s achey like a workout. Odd but not bad.

Did not experience a POTS spike during the attack but afterwards my heart was doing loop-de-loops. Suspect I need more salt and water tbh. I was limiting intake in case I vomited which is typical with ovulation migraines but I did not. Also progress.

Overall Unpleasant but tolerable.

This has been an odd migraine.

It’s still ongoing but the pain is considerably milder and I’m less cognitively affected.

Starting to wonder if getting needles stabbed into my face twice a week (acupuncture) is having an effect…

[putschki1969]

Hi Puts! YK just announced that Keiko will be not participated in YK Live #21 this year 😢 I'm kinda sad about this.

Okay, I didn't expect to have to use this gif so soon...

All jokes aside, this announcement is indeed very saddening and disappointing but I would be lying if I said I was super surprised.

Just a few days ago I addressed some possibilities for the future in THIS POST here and I was trying my best to remain optimistic despite knowing very well that Yuki had pretty much cemented her stance on the whole thing by releasing that initial statement. The way she positioned herself as the victim and everyone else as perpetrator was a clear message. By explicitly name-calling the members, it was made to look like Hikaru and Keiko were “aligning themselves with the enemy”. The Asia Tour probably couldn't be cancelled or re-arranged due to existing agreements/contracts but we didn't know how the Kalafina debacle would affect anything after that. Seems like we have our answer now. The girls have all officially fallen out of favour and are being considered as “Space Craft adjacent”. They are now in the same position as Wakana, nothing more than pariahs. Which means of course that everyone is now following the usual M.O. of ignoring each other’s presence. I'm not saying this is all coming from Yuki's side, there's a very high chance of the girls themselves being restricted in their activities due to contractual obligations (Space Craft most definitely made them sign something to make that Kalafina Live possible).

As discussed previously, we got our first glimpses of the shunning process when Yuki decided to distance herself on social media by unfollowing Hikaru and Keiko.

Then just a few days ago, a photo was posted from the recording studio and a certain someone was notably absent.

I guess Keiko's exclusion from the YKL is just a natural progression although I will honestly say that I didn't think Yuki would go that far, jeopardising the quality of her performances like that. Considering that her craft has always been her main priority, letting go of the literal backbone of 90% of her live music seems like a very stupid decision but I guess pettiness knows no boundaries in this ever-lasting feud between Team Yuki and Team Space Craft.

Oh well, needless to say, I won't be attending YK events any time soon. I don't hate her and I still appreciate her work but there's no longer any incentive for me personally. The girls have always come first and nothing will ever change about that. I am not Team YK or Team Space Craft, I am Team Kalafina and always will be! This just means I will have to support their solo activities even more and hopefully they will all increase their activities to give me lots of opportunities to show my appreciation.

As I mentioned in my post from a few days ago, nothing in life happens without a price having to be paid. Sacrifices need to be made, time has to pass. I am sure the girls were aware of most of these consequences when they decided to commit themselves to the Kalafina Anniversary Live project. Just like all these years ago, Wakana was aware what would happen if she stayed with Space Craft. The Japanese entertainment industry is not for the weak, shitty things happen all the time, you win some, you lose some. Hikaru actually shared some very good advice during her live broadcast from the other day. Life has a way of balancing itself out, for every bad thing that happens, a good thing will follow. And every rough experience might one day turn into an opportunity so I guess we can try to look at the whole thing with a more positive mindset. We don't know if this is permanent or not and we also have no idea what's in store for Kalafina so I refuse to despair because of it.

Speaking of Hikaru, she also mentioned that throughout her career, the main priority have always been the fans. I think this sentiment is shared by Keiko and Wakana which is why they ultimately decided to hold the Kalafina live, knowing very well that they'd have to pay dearly for their decision.

Of course they didn't think there would be such a harsh backlash in the initial phase but that was mostly fueled by Yuk's unfortunate phrasing in the statement. If she had refrained from mentioning the members, I don't think that there would have been such an outrage and immediate condemnation of the girls. Fans would have been upset but most of them would have simply blamed Space Craft and not the girls themselves.

Nonetheless, all that bitching and moaning from "some" fans didn't stop thousands of people from getting their ticket and showing up for the live. As far as I am concerned, the concert was a huge success and everyone there was filled with happiness. The girls must have surely interpreted it like this as well so hopefully, they felt like it was worth their sacrifice.

[abnormal-vacuum]

A closer look at Simon "Ghost" Riley's interpersonal guilt

chapter 1

ghost/soap 1,365 words - ao3 Tags: guilt? mentions of abuse, complicated feelings.. hello this is my first fanfic in like 5 or 6 years. its hopefully gonna be part of a series.

Simon “Ghost” Riley considers himself a man sewn together by his mistakes. Every decision, right and wrong, has led him to become who and what he is today. Since his birth, he’s made nearly every mistake he possibly could. If he was one to believe in separate timelines and alternate realities, he’d think he was the worst version of himself out there. Despite this, he's still able to recognize that he's made some good decisions. He’s defused bombs, sniped terrorists and saved countless lives by doing his job. But those feel weightless in comparison to the sheer amount of loss he views himself as responsible for. Tommy, his nephews, countless soldiers and civilians whose names he doesn't know but faces he’ll remember forever.

Point being, Simon doesn't deem himself a good person, despite the frequent assurance from people around him that he’s an honest (enough) man. He thinks he was a good kid dealt a shitty hand, but that kid has long since rotted away. Although, if you asked that kid if he felt like a good person, he probably wouldn't know how to respond. He would take far too long of a pause between the question being asked and his inevitable, “oh, yeah. ‘Course I’m a good person.” Because realistically, at least at the time, he’d never done anything to make him a bad person. Maybe sometimes he was selfish, but that's just how kids are. Maybe it was the fact that he was born into an unkind environment. A den of snakes, the last place a child should have to be. Households like that breed uncomfortable feelings. Maybe Simon was born with a seed of evil deep in his heart that has yet to have the opportunity to corrupt him fully. Maybe he just needs to go to therapy.

He’s also thought that maybe he’s just too close to his current self to view things objectively. Maybe when he’s older and retired he’ll pity this present iteration in the way Simon pities his teenage self. Realistically, that's where he’s headed. Sure, he’ll have regrets… but that's just a part of life. Especially a life like his. He knows what the team thinks of him. Price thinks he’s a good man. He makes sure to assure him of this whenever he notices Simon having an ‘off’ day. He knows Gaz and Soap like him, but they aren't exactly privy to his life before becoming Ghost, at least not enough to clue them into what he really deems as ‘Bad’. Price does know this, yet he still insists that Simon is one of his best. Not pure, not without blame or blood, but still good. Somehow, despite how much he tells his captain, Simon still manages to persuade himself into believing that he's wrong. John Price, whose judgement he trusts nearly wholeheartedly in every other situation… he doesn't believe. If he really thought about it, he might be able to recognize how absurd that really sounds. But he doesn't. So it remains unresolved.

This is how he thinks whenever he has a moment alone that lasts just a hair too long. When he's shaving, taking a shower, or buzzing his head. When he can't fall asleep, which is more often than not. When he’s on leave, eating a microwave meal all alone. At the gym if he forgets his headphones, or if his sniping position reminds him a little too much of home. Wherever home is.

He hates silence, despite how often he surrounds himself with it. Which, he thinks, is one of the many reasons that Johnny has managed to lure him in. He talks. A lot. Not too much, but a lot. He keeps the comms warm and manages to bring out Simon's chatty side. He’s somehow able to talk at the perfect times, as if he can sense when Simon’s brain starts to steer him down a dark, well trodden path. He tells a shitty joke, or nudges Ghost's knee to make some snide comment about a private he saw trip on his way to the heli, and suddenly everything is okay again. He makes things easy, and Ghost feels a little pathetic over the whole situation. Especially because he knows it’s fucking effortless for the Scot. Easy as breathing-- he's probably not even aware how much of a crutch his presence has become. Times previously taken up by brooding and reliving painful memories have now been filled by Soap prattling on about some larger than life feat of his. Or even worse, Simon will lie awake in bed and think about him. That stupid mohawk and the scar on his chin. He keeps forgetting to ask where that came from. None of this is to say that Johnny makes Ghost feel like a good person, because he doesn't. But he does fill up the space that previously allowed him to think too hard about his own morality. And, at least right now, that might be more useful.

Johnny is bright in more ways than one. He’s smart, one of the smartest people Simon has ever met. But he's also bright. Bright as in painful to look at. Like the sun, at least to Simon. Not based on looks (although he is quite handsome), but on… demeanor, maybe. The way he carries himself. Simon hasn't been able to put a finger on what he's trying to describe. His confidence, his… charm. John MacTavish is something else entirely. Separate from what, Ghost isn't sure. They’ve only known each other for about four months, which is one of the many reasons Ghost finds this… fondness for the sergeant so frustrating. Because he was hooked from day one. It took no time for Soap to worm himself in the spot between Ghost’s lungs and his ribcage. It's one thing for him to be attracted to the man. He's been attracted to plenty of soldiers in the past, but he typically does nothing about it. And most of them haven't been on the same damn task force as him. He's a professional, for Christ's sake, and those feelings are almost always fleeting. But they’ve never felt like this. Luckily he's good at keeping quiet, especially in situations like this.

He doesnt idolize Johnny. He knows he's not perfect. You don’t get this high up into the SAS by keeping your hands clean. But he’s sure that whatever Soap has done is nothing in comparison to his mountain of mistakes. Gaz has hinted that he may return his feelings. Ghost always chooses to take this as either Gaz being a right prick, or those feelings simply being lust. It can't be anything more than that, he won’t allow for it. He's not even sure that Soap likes men. He's never caught him with a woman before, but that doesn’t mean it hasn't happened. But that's not really important in the grand scheme of things. Ghost would never get involved with him. At least that's what he tells himself every time something particularly… tempting occurs.

Like that time they were trapped in a closet together. It was all knees against groins and pained grunts. It was only 45 minutes but it felt like hours. Soap was chewing gum, making loud smacking noises. It got to the point where Simon nearly knocked him upside the head. As soon as Ghost snapped at him to quit it, Soap stuck it beneath one of the shelves behind them. They made eye contact the whole time. Not a word of protest. It seems innocuous, but given the man's reputation of being… insubordinate, his eagerness to follow orders was surprising. If everything was right in the world he would have kissed him right there. They talked about nothing for the remainder of the time, whispering close in each other's ear as to not be caught. They both smelled rank, yet neither of them mentioned it. Safe to say that was all Simon thought about in bed for several weeks afterwards.

Anyways, Simon doesn't want Johnny to become another mistake in his past, whatever that means. So he’ll remain where he is, firmly planted on the already blurry line between colleague, superior and friend.

[senkothesquirrel02]

My friend and I are creating a fanfic and we’d like some advice.

So I saw a while ago the meme about the smallest dragon with 1 single coin as a hoard as well as the tumblr story about it and I thought……….. why not make it ghoap? We made it a fantasy incorporated with humans (not to be mistaken as a hybrid au, this is full on supernatural au with some humans) It kinda has been an add/adhd brainrot story where we just indulged the chaos. By no means are my friend and I done writing yet and we will hopefully post on AO3. We won’t spoil the plot yet. (Yes it’s brainrot and hyper focusing but it’s fun) Also my friend told me to say I’m the one responsible for angst bits.

Here’s what we have so far for stuff/memes we added, advice/ contribution of memes or ideas greatly appreciated:

Soap and Ghost povs

Absolutely no idea how military works so working with idea of modern knights/bounty hunters

COD MW (2022) full crew including Farrah/Alex from their raid mission (briefly mentions a ValeriaXGraves crackship…….. I blame Glitch for the explanation of it to which it sounds very real #samesnake)

Cod zombies element 115 and Aether and Mr. Peeks

MW3 ‘23: only using Price and Sheppard end credit (‘23 canon does not exist)

Codm lore: only the tointine/couteau with the armor of Gideon, mention of kilo mythic, Templar and ghosts dynamic, added Sophia, Dame but playing with the fact she’s crazy and in Tontine (she tried raising Sophia to be her predecessor but there was hints in lore her training was very brutal like Damian Wayne’s but she’d possibly allow the shit the Tontine was doing like experiments), and tempest, also used the bit about Sophia working as Makarov protege. No mention of Shepard but will use basis of what happened in Winter War/Final Snow comics between Ghost and Temp as an “eye for eye” scenario, not trying to save Russian from merc sent after him— clearing up loose ends for Shepard)

With addition of mythic Sophia it kinda leaves plot idea of her 💀 then coming back due to the Valkyrie design.

COD Ghost comics (Codm is using cannon of 09 MW for ghosts character/most of lore) Mama Riley but she’s a dragon trapped by human Dad Riley thanks to enchanted item/trickery (yes we fixed the plot hole so she’s still seen as a good mom)

Mama Riley also becomes a patron of the lost and lonely children in the after life and beats the shit out of Dad Riley in afterlife (Sophia accidentally gets adopted)

Burnette ghost

MW ‘09 (using Roach, elements of price in gulag, Makarov being a🧚‍♂️)

Roach being embodiment of chaos

Mention of DC Comics, more specifically Damian Wayne and Talia Al Ghul

Marvel Deadpool/Spiderman dynamic (only for comedic relief and multiversal stupidity),bloodstone family, and mysterium

Looney Tunes types stilupidity (Wile E. coyote like traps)

Arcane aesthetic (steampunk/elegance from Piltover but wild magic is more accepted and grown wild in plants, small places/ towns more medival setup) and Vander (pre his first💀) with the bar

Mythology from Norse, Celtic, Dutch, Greek, Egyptian, and some D&D influences for creatures

Use of Spanish, French, Gaelic (might not be best translation)

NikPrice

GhostSoap

AleRudy

FarrahAlex

Dragon Ghost (crow mentality for shiny but coin is main part of hoard) Elf Soap (gets adopted by large creatures *cough* owlbear *cough* and has bad luck and Arson/pyromaniac)

Dragon Ghost Nik Price can shift to small version dragon, human, or large sized dragons (ghost likes being small 90% of time but price makes him be human…… this leads to soap thinking ghosts a baby) while in small dragon can’t talk in “human” tongue so squeaks (will have inner monologue tho found in italics)

HC soap would be friends with reaper (or Donn Celtic god of death) and they’d be like “you’re not supposed to be dead, stay alive for one consecutive month please!” And soap will try to befriend every creature (leads to trouble)

Adding Atlantis (ghost would be a sea/land *atlantian* dragon because from research says the island supposedly was directly between Canada and uk part of Atlantic) as well as the utopia paradise of Avalon and hopefully a mythological citadel if I can find one (let me know if y’all know one, hopefully same idea as the Atlantis or Avalon, might make one linked to dragons or shadowrealm idk)

Dragon Nik/Price (Nik Batman and robin adopts Ghost. Price begrudgingly agrees)

Fae Laswell (no one screws with her)

Fae Gaz

Eldritch Roach (yes he will hide in vents, no one knows he eldritch besides Laswell, has shadow abilities due to ‘09, will be feral gremlin)

Do not know what to put AleRudy as or Farrah Alex (advice please)

Dame as human Witch

Temp/Sophia werewolves (using the idea of being able to tell who is shifter by a certain eye color, can’t remember who wrote that but it’s from tumblr

No smut but will have slow burn/makeout (accidentally made a steamy scene during Roba time but I won’t say where)

Will have angst (mostly directed to ghost, mentions of time with Roba including *that* Christmas, adding how he was hunted by monster hunters and being sold out on op then seperated from 141, being used in ritual by rusalka, and other bits) and heavy gore

Heavy swearing also

Flashback of memories (good and angst ones)

4th wall breaks (both are call outs)

D&D style side quests/tasks

Anyone saw despicable me movie where one minion drank something and turned into glow stick? Using that idea but it’s berries and ghost is impromptu glow stick

Friends idea “hear me out, bow with bell on small dragon ghost”

“He’s 7 he can’t drink” “what am I supposed to do with him?!”

Accents leading to mispronounced name (ghost to cost for soap)

Pavlov’s ghost in to “sitting pretty” at the sound of breagha when in tiny dragon form…….can and has happened when human(Gaelic for pretty)

Idea of a tiny predator being able to bring down big animal, like 10x their size (from black footed sand cat hunting style)

Tiny dragon scruffing (yes acting exactly like kitten)

“Stop telling everyone I’m dead!” (Pertaining to soap taking a most likely fatal contract from a drunk promising big payout and everyone presumes he’s dead and the drunks being yelled at because of it)

Soap sketching Ghost whenever possible

Garlic bread goblin meme of ARSON!!

Personal hc of Sophia and ghost having sibling dynamic after she stops trying to kill ghost for vengeance. Sophia being chaotic as well (she and roach might become friends…. Who knows).

“My death was greatly exaggerated”—Sophia (and kinda Templar)

Community hc of ghost and Farrah having sibling energy

“Welcome to the shit fuck hell festival.” Quote from a fanfic

“I plead the fifth” meme (not the song, the one of them accidentally admit saying they did something stupid and backpedaling)

“Why are you here? Five words or less” (something along the lines of) “out. For. A. Walk. Bitch.”

Ghost Sophia bonding over their traumas. Implied mention of Farrah and Ghost had bonded over their traumas

Literally everyone wants to beat the shit out of Dame (if you know Codm lore you’ll know why)

Gave Sophia the call sign rouge because in the contract business (and family tradition) they need call signs

Shadow company setting bounties on Soap (let’s just say soap blew up their complex on an op)

Working with idea for supernatural entities having fast regeneration and only being sent to limbo when receiving fatal injury so body can properly heal

Oh no he’s hot turns to “your telling me this dragon was a fucking 10 all along but none of you told me? I was carrying a damned 10 and treating him like a baby?!!!”

“I’m just saying the Canadians were onto something with the Geneva checklist—”—Nik as it pertains to a monster hunter who caught Ghost

[“Laswell, he was going to sell it(whelp) to Sinombre. If we use those tactics we can get the name of Sinombre!”—Nik

“As much as I appreciate your enthusiasm. That would cause the UN to be hounding us and I don’t need that headache. Hey, PRICE DON'T YOU DARE USE THAT CAR BATTERY!”—Laswell

“But Laswell…….” —Price

“Just because the gulag used it on you doesn’t mean you do it to other people!!”—Laswell

“But-”—Price

“Where’d you even get the battery— did you take it out of my car?”—Laswell

“No, fine I’ll return it later.”—Price

“Better do it.”—Laswell] differing ideas for interrogation (‘09 iykyk)

Laswell being the only one to understand tiny dragon squeak/draconic besides said dragons

Idea of tiny dragon ghost being constantly yeeted

Air jail (oil lamp for tiny dragonghost when he acts like spicy little shit)

HC: They need to hide coffee from ghost or the little shit will be like hammy the squirrel from over the edge or twitchy for hoodwinked

“I can’t mansplain, manipulate, or make wife my way out of this……… Manslaughter it is.” —Nik or Ghost

[“What’s that small wood thing in the shape of a bag pipe?”

“An ocarina Johnny?”

“Oh! You mean the instrument that little elf guy plays in Zelda? What’s his name, Jerry or buddy?”

“It’s Link you uncultured swine. Never dis legend of Zelda again or ill sick Demise’s curse on your ass.” Ghost having too much knowledge about video games]

[writingtraumaforever]

Uncontrolled Chaos: Chapter 39

Notes: I'm baaaack! I had a LOVELY vacation! Tons of fun! All up until the very last day when I got a severe sinus infection and then had to fly home with it and- NEVER fly with a sinus infection, people! It is apparently very dangerous. I had no idea. Long story short, my ears no longer are working properly, I have enough snot to fill an olympic swimming pool, and I am in a constant state of dizziness and am basically drunk. SO. Be patient with me. But I didn't want to keep you all waiting any longer than I already have. So enjoy the chapter and hopefully it makes sense despite being typed in my very drunken state of mind. If not, I'll just fix it later. Smh.

Summary: Shadow and Sonic discuss insecurities.. The Black Arms Invasion is discussed.

UC Masterpost!

Link to MY AO3!

Start:

Shadow has no idea how the heck he got here.

Everything had been going relatively well. This world’s version of Rose turned up with the green chaos emerald she had found while visiting a friend on Seaside Island which had brought them to a solid five emeralds, only in need of two more which isn’t half bad for only being at this for a couple of days.

Not to mention that Amy brought a sense of comfort and familiarity Shadow hasn’t really gotten here thus far. 

Rouge had been nice to see and have around, yes, but this version of Rouge was more standoffish with him. Wouldn’t have much to do with him— which he’s never admit bothered him as much as it actually did.

However, Amy Rose?? She was consistent in both worlds, it seems. A friendly face with a loving heart that was open to Shadow despite him being a bit more grouchy than her typical Shadow.

She had approached him immediately, hugging him and assuring him that they’d get him back home soon.

‘Oh, you poor thing! I can’t imagine how overwhelming all of this must be for you. We’ll have no fear, Amy Rose is here! And I’m here to make sure your time here is as relaxed as it possibly can be! Care for some tea to help calm your nerve??’

She was a godsend, really.

And he did in fact very much appreciate her tea. It definitely was a lot more soothing for him than the infinite amount of coffee he’s been digesting. He was starting to get jittery.

They were just sitting down to properly enjoy their tea and chat with one another about the differences of their worlds when the echidna had come running inside announcing they’d made contact with his own world.

And well.. that went to shit real quick.

It was nice at first. Wholesome. And Shadow would never admit it aloud, but he really did feel better seeing Sonic look so happy. So relieved. All wagging tail and grinning mouth and teary eyes. He was the epitome of joyous at his verbal reunion with his partner. And despite feeling a bit odd hearing his own voice speaking so softly towards the blue hedgehog, it was.. good. 

Sonic needed this..

Speaking of Sonic, his own had piped up at one point and..

It did odd things to Shadow’s stomach.

‘How’s our Shadow??’ he had asked. And while he’s been hearing that obnoxious voice plenty the past several days thanks to being close and personal with this world’s Sonic, there was something about knowing it was his world’s Sonic asking how he was doing that made it.. different.

He had spoken up, being even more thrown off by how ecstatic his own Sonic had sounded hearing from him. How relieved. He hadn’t been expecting it..

They quickly return to their typical banter, trading a few one-liners about Shadow being a grouch and Sonic being an idiot. Typical. Familiar.

He can’t help but smile to himself..

And that’s when the shit hit the fan.

Turns out Alternate Shadow hasn’t informed the team back in normal Shadow’s world about his and Alternate Sonic’s relationship.

Specifically, he hasn’t informed Sonic.

Sonic sounded shocked to say the least.

Shadow stayed quiet through most of it, arms crossed with a small frown on his muzzle as he watches this world’s Sonic become more and more worked up. His blue quills rising defensively, tail no longer wagging and instead pointing in agitation while his ears are folded back in disappointment.

All signs of a not-so-happy hedgehog.

Which makes for a not-so-happy conversation.

“You know what??? Whatever. None of this is essential anyway, so I’m just gonna go do essential things. Here’s Tails.”

Then Sonic was shoving the mic away from himself and standing from the chair with a huff, Shadow frowning and furrowing his brows at the actions that he himself deemed a bit dramatic. Especially when Sonic had been showing so much maturity and wisdom when preaching at him in the kitchen earlier about Shadow running from his identity crisis.

Talk about insecurities. The hedgehog was a hypocrite.

“Sonic-!” Amy called to try and calm him down only for him to tear out of the garage with a sonic boom in his wake and a streak of blue behind.

Amy frowns with a sigh, hugging her arms around herself as she looks in the direction he disappeared off into.

Tails takes over talking to the other world’s group, Shadow turning to face Knuckles with a glare.

“Did you have to tease him about his partner potentially cheating on him??”

“You what?!” Amy gasps, her empathy turning to fury and being directed at the red echidna now.

Knuckles holds his hands up in surrender, eyes wide as he backs away from Amy who looks on the verge of summoning her hammer.

“Wait wait wait—! I was just joking! Come on! How was I suppose to know he’d take it so seriously???”

“You know how he takes everything to heart even if he pretends not to!” Amy growls, her hands moving to her hips as she backs Knuckles into a corner. Rouge sits perched on the nose of the Tornado looking amused by this entire thing.

Shadow just sighs and rubs his fingers into his temples, closing his eyes a moment as the team continues their bickering..

Sonic will be back.

He just needs time to cool off. Think rationally.

His emotions are high right now for a variety of reasons. He simply needs some space..

He expects him to be back within an hour realizing how stupid he was being and how childish. 

But sunset came and went, and there was still no sign of the blue hedgehog late into the night.

So Shadow takes matters into his own hands.

“I’m gonna go after him,” he announces, standing from his seat on the couch and moving towards the door. It’s ridiculous how much of an effect this idiot has on him no matter what world he’s in. Always cleaning up the fool’s messes.

“Uhh- is that the best idea???” Amy asks with knitted brows, rising from her own chair now. They had both been sitting in the living room waiting up for Sonic. She’s dressed in pajamas— a red tank top and white fuzzy shorts with her socks and gloves still on. Her red headband replaced by a red scrunchie holding her hair up in a loose bun. 

Knuckles and Rouge turned in for some sleep— heading out earlier to search for the last two emeralds. Tails is still in the workshop fidgeting with the radio, but Shadow saw him nodding off before he left him be, so he imagines he’ll be turning in soon— if he hasn’t already fallen asleep at his workbench.

“Why wouldn’t it be??”

“Well,” she rubs the back of her neck, “Because he’s gone because he’s upset at his Shadow.. so maybe seeing you will make him emotional again?”

“He’s not upset at his Shadow, he’s upset because he acted foolishly, and I’m sure he realizes that. He’s likely embarrassed.”

“You’re probably right,” she sighs, “But this still isn’t your world.. I don’t think you should be running around alone out there—“

“I can take care of myself, Rose,” Shadow assures with a tiny hint of a smile her direction, Amy seeming to visibly relax at this reassurance, “If I’m not back before sunrise, you can wake the others and come looking. But I’ll be back before two hours, tops.”

She seems hesitant still. Unsure. But after giving it some thought, she gives in and nods with a little frown, “Okay.. but please be careful. And please go easy on him.”

“No promises,” he huffs, turning and walking out the door.

And he knows just where to look.

———

Crawling into the tree he had been to only a few days ago, Shadow can’t help but wonder what he’s about to stumble upon. He’s fairly confident the blue hedgehog will be here since this was introduced as one of his comfort spots, and despite how he may have acted earlier, he knows he’s missing his partner. He just wonders if he’ll find him angry. Or sad. Shadow rather him be angry, honestly. He could deal with angry. He didn’t know how to deal with Sonic being sad.. And frankly, neither did Sonic.

Ducking through the narrow passageway under the ground and through the siding of the mountain, he reaches the hole at the end in the roof of the cave. The vine used to climb up isn’t there, being lifted as a sign of not wanting to be bothered. 

Lucky for Shadow, he has air shoes.

Kicking them in hover-mode, he allows the fumes to slowly lift him off the ground and up through the hole. Peeking out, he finds Sonic there a few feet away sitting amongst the greenery with his knees hugged to his chest..

Shadow sighs through his nose, turning his air shoes off to land on the edge of the hole and slowly step towards him.

He doesn’t speak. Neither does Sonic.

Walking forward until he’s at the hedgehog’s side, he crouches down to sit; once again careful not to smoosh any flowers if he can help it. Sonic doesn’t react, only pulls his legs tighter against himself and buries his mouth into his knees.. Long nose peeking out over them. Shadow’s lips purse, crimson eyes watching the blue hedgehog that just stares ahead at nothing in particular. He can see how fast the hero’s mind is travelling. How despite his current stillness, his head hasn’t stopped moving. 

Shadow knows that feeling all too well.

He sighs from his nose, looking ahead as well to simply take in the moonlit view along with Sonic. Quiet.

They stay like this a long moment.

Shadow just being there with Sonic, so he doesn’t have to be alone..

But he promised Rose two hours. So they can’t stay here all night.

“...You’re an idiot, you know that, right?”

Sonic huffs, chuckling with a small headshake though there’s no amusement in the laugh. More of a scoff than anything.

“You’ve only reminded me of that every chance you’ve gotten since being here.” “Well, don’t do idiotic things, and I wouldn’t have a reason to remind you.”

“What do you want??”

Sonic’s tone is sharp. Trying to give off hostility, but Shadow sees right through it. He hears the ache.. The need for comfort.

“..I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”

“Well, I’m fine. So you can go now.” “You have everyone worried.. Especially Rose.” “She’ll be fine. She knows I’ve been through way worse.” “Perhaps that’s why she’s so worried.” Sonic frowns at that, glancing at Shadow out of the corner of his eyes before moving to rest his chin on his knees rather than having it hidden behind his thighs.

“...Don’t act like you know anything any of us have been through.”

“I don’t claim to,” Shadow shakes his head, knowing this is just Sonic trying to avert from the real problem. Him. “But I know what worrying for a friend is like.. And it’s no picnic.”

“Yeah, well then maybe you should go back and let her know I’m fine.” “I don’t intend on returning without you.” Sonic huffs at that, seeming frustrated by Shadow’s persistence but not surprised by it.

“Can’t I just pout in peace?” “So you admit you’re pouting?” Shadow’s brow quirks, head turning to look at Sonic now with a small tilt.

“Yeah, well, I have plenty of reason to be upset,” Sonic remarks defensively, lifting his chin from his knees and turning to glare at Shadow.

“Oh please, Hedgehog, I think we both know you were being a bit dramatic. Your Shadow wouldn’t–” “As if you would know anything about our relationship- about any relationship,” Sonic snaps, brows furrowed and jaw locked.

Every instinct in Shadow screams to match his energy. Give him the same hostility he’s receiving. But he knows that won’t help anything.. So after a long moment of the two just glaring at one another in a challenging sort of way.. Shadow takes a deep breath in and exhales it out slowly.

“You’re right. I don’t know what your relationship consists of. Nor do I know your whole history together or what you’ve been through… But I know myself. And while I am quite different than your version of me, I would like to believe we’re alike enough that I can confidently say I would never even dream of hurting someone I love like that..”

Sonic frowns at this, his scold melting into something a bit more achy and pained.. Green eyes drift away as he looks down at his shoes in thought.

“..I have never been in a relationship. But this-.. It’s not because I don’t recognize what goes into them,” Shadow explains quietly, voice calm and gentle, “I know it takes hard work.. And understanding and communication.. And plenty of patience. I also know it takes loyalty. An undeniable and unquestioning amount of it.”

Sonic’s ears flatten against his head as he listens, arms tightening around his knees as if seeking comfort from them. Like he wants to curl up and hide away in a little ball.

“..I never considered a relationship not because I’m incapable of it.., but simply because I… I feel undeserving of one,” Shadow admits honestly, “I don’t want to drag anyone into my hellhole of a mess. Don’t want to have someone have to deal with my past and try to make a future out of it when I myself struggle to most of the time.” Sonic’s eyes lift to look at Shadow, greens becoming misty as if he wants to disagree and tell him that he shouldn’t think such things but simply doesn’t have the energy to do so right now.

Shadow continues before he can anyway, “So I know how serious relationships are.. I know those who can manage them are admirable.. And I know that if I ever found someone I trusted enough to let in and begin one with?? The thought of even looking anyone else’s way wouldn’t even cross my mind.”

Sonic lets out a shaky little whine at that, hand lifting to press the heel of his palm to his eye and rub there. Trying not to cry. 

He knew Shadow was right. They may not be the same, but both Shadows were certainly alike in many, many ways. There seems to be traits that simply carry through all worlds and dimensions. Shadow’s being his resilience and determination, his patience, his wisdom, his strength, his honesty… and certainly his loyalty.

Because loyal is one of the top words that come to mind when asked to describe Shadow the Hedgehog..

“Damnit..,” Sonic sniffles out, “I was so stupid..” “Yes,” Shadow nods agreeingly, “But I’m sure the other me won’t hold it against you. It’s not as if it’s your first time.” Sonic gives a breathy chuckle at that, dropping his hand from his face to roll his eyes and give Shadow a sad and teary smile. “Yeah, that’s true..” Shadow offers his own tiny smile in response, brows knitting slightly as he slowly reaches a palm out to pat Sonic’s back. It’s a bit awkward, but he’s trying.

“But why wouldn’t he tell your Sonic about us??” Sonic asks with a small sniffle, rubbing his gloved wrist across the underside of his nose. “Well, there’s a lot of possible answers to that,” Shadow sighs, leaning back on his own hands now as he looks up at the starry sky, “My Sonic is an idiot just like you, you see. So having a bombshell like ‘an alternate version of you and your rival are madly in love in another universe’ dropped on him would likely elicit some pretty extreme reactions.” Sonic hums at that, head tilting in thought as he ponders this a moment, “..So you’re saying the alternate me is probably giving him hell right now?” “Oh, absolutely.” “That makes me feel a little better,” Sonic chuckles again, wiping the last of his building tears from his eyes and sighing with a quiet groan, “I’m so embarrassed– He’s probably pissed at me for ruining our first talk since this whole mess started. I mean– how petty was that?? I haven’t heard from my boyfriend in over a week because he’s trapped in an alternate dimension. We’re all potentially gonna die. And instead of taking any time left given to talk to him, I throw a fit over the idea of him cheating on me. And with another version of me, at that!” Shadow hums a chuckle with a shrug, “Pretty petty.” “So petty,” Sonic groans and rubs his hands down his face in frustration with himself before throwing them into the air and falling backwards onto his back dramatically.

Shadow smirks a bit, watching the blue hedgehog laying there beside him dealing with the dumb mistake he’s made..

“..Perhaps it’s more than the secrecy of your relationship in the other world that’s bothering you..” Sonic purses his lips at that, brows furrowing in thought as he looks back down to his shoes.

“..What if-.. What if he doesn’t like me as much as that other version?..”

Shadow sighs at this, opening his mouth to reiterate his alternate’s undying loyalty only for Sonic to stop him.

“No, no, just– hear me out.. He would never cheat on me, you’re right. He’s much too loyal for something like that. But he-.. He could develop feelings? Maybe your Sonic is a better match for him. Maybe he talks to me again and finds that he enjoys talking to your Sonic far more. Maybe he-..” Sonic’s voice cuts short, cracking as the blue hedgehog feels himself getting worked up again. He pauses to take a deep breath before sighing out, “Maybe he doesn’t want to come home..”

Shadow frowns at this, watching how Sonic’s glossy eyes stare at the stars in the sky above them.. the half blown up moon that’s shards still linger here and there. Littered in the black abyss of space.

He knows he’s wondering if the alternate Shadow is looking at that moon too.. 

After a moment, Shadow sighs and lays himself down beside Sonic. His hands crossed over his stomach as the flowers tower and loom around him. Framing the two of them in their spot. He knows he’s gonna be picking petals out of his quills for days after this— ugh.

His own eyes raise to the sky then.. looking at that moon..

And maybe-… maybe his Sonic is looking at it right now, too… or an alternate version of it, at least.

He finds himself wondering if Sonic thinks of him when he looks at the moon the way Shadow thinks of Sonic.. he wonders if he regrets that day during the ARK battle.. how he couldn’t save Shadow.

He wonders if it ever even crosses his Sonic’s mind the way it lingered so heavily on this one’s..

“I don’t think you have anything to worry about,” Shadow says simply after a long moment of silence, his voice almost sad. Melancholic. Longing..

Sonic’s head turns, Shadow can feel his gaze on his profile.

“How could you know that?..”

“Because my Sonic—“ Shadow sighs, catching himself as he shakes his head and corrects, “the Sonic from my world.. He doesn’t feel the way you do. About me.”

Sonic is quiet at that. His head turning back to the sky. Shadow sighs through his nose, finding himself really thinking about this fact for the first time ever. He never really allowed himself to before.. to wonder why Sonic didn’t look for him after the fall. To contemplate that Sonic may just have thought the world was simply better off without him.

While Shadow has the thoughts quite often about himself, for whatever reason the idea of Sonic having them felt… devastating.

Before all this mess, he simply believed that Sonic thought him dead and that was that. Never looked too much into it. But now?.. Now he wondered.. what made Sonic give up on him so quickly.

It was a selfish thing to think, he knows. And it was silly to care. But deep down despite his dismay for even being associated with the blue idiot at times, he always admired him. Respected him. Held him at a higher regard than anyone else. He truly did want Sonic’s approval, his nod of confirmation, his respect and positive attention. The times Shadow has managed to truly disappoint Sonic have been few but every single one have lingered for a long, long time. Never left him. Always haunted him.

Sonic was good.

He wanted to be good in Sonic’s eyes..

He’d never admit such a thing, he’d die before doing so..

But it was a secret truth he carried deep inside himself.

“My Shadow almost killed me.”

Shadow blinks at that, knocked from his train of thought as though he had been going a million miles an hour and suddenly was at zero. 

He certainly wasn’t expecting that.

“I-..”

“Sorry, that was-,“ Sonic sighs and rolls his eyes at himself, realizing his error, “That was a bit heavy and sudden, huh?? I meant that.. I know what you’re thinking. That you.. went too far. That you’re too bad. That your Sonic doesn’t look at you the way I look at my Shadow because you’re just too bad, right??..”

Shadow blinks, head turning to look at Sonic now and their eyes meeting again. He hesitates. Then nods slowly..

Sonic smirks slightly then looks back to the sky, “Yeah. Figures. My Shadow is always way too hard on himself, too.. But what I was sayin’ was.. From what you’ve told me, your life has honestly been kinda mellow compared to my Shadow’s in terms of bad choices.”

“‘Mellow’?” Shadow scoffs, rolling his eyes and looking back to the stars, “I’m afraid my bad choices are vast. You underestimate—“

“My Shadow teamed with Doom during the Black Arms Invasion,” Sonic interrupts again, once again rendering Shadow speechless for a long moment.

Shadow.. doesn’t know what to say to that. Or how to even comprehend it. How could-… how could a Shadow that was found and surrounded by so many people who loved and took care of him ever team with Doom?

“..What happened?”

“It’s.. a long story. A lot of shit happened in the details, and I’ll skip all that for the sake of.. I don’t know. Making it easier on me to talk about,” Sonic chuckles awkwardly, Shadow’s brows knitting at that.

“We don’t have to—“

“No, no. I-.. I want to,” the hero clarifies with a little shrug, his eyes staying on the sky since it’s too hard to look at Shadow in that moment.. 

“..So from what you’ve said, you pretty much sided with us through the Black Arms Invasion?” “More or less..” “Heh, well… my Shadow? He.. he did at first, of course. It wasn’t a few weeks after we found him like it was for you, though. I think we found him sooner after the ARK Battle than the Rouge in your world found your Shadow is why. I spent only a month searching for Shadow before I found him, and then we had four together before Metal Sonic started kicking up his trouble.. The Black Arms invasion came a few weeks after that.” This was certainly different to Shadow’s own timeline where he was awoken five months after the ARK Battle during the Metal Sonic fiasco. The Black Arms was two weeks after, and he wasn’t emotionally connected to anyone at that point. Just lost and confused.. Easily manipulated and searching desperately for his place in this world.

“Black Doom took to Shadow like a parasite. He had him in his head, manipulating and moving his memories around to his liking, making Shadow believe things that never happened and see things that hadn’t yet happened. He didn’t tell anyone. He hid it, not wanting any of us to worry or be scared of him while his own fear of himself just kept growing and growing.. I didn’t even know until it was too late..”

Shadow can hear the guilt in Sonic’s voice. How he blamed himself for not seeing it sooner, for not knowing what was happening before Black Doom’s claws had been so neatly fitted around his Shadow’s neck..

This seemed to be an ongoing trend for them: blaming themselves for the others’ misfortunes.

“And by then Black Doom had Shadow… exactly where he wanted him,” Sonic sighs quietly, his brows furrowing as he remembers it all.. Flashes of the large almost ethereal monster Shadow had become. Dark tentacles, looming wings, sharp and long teeth and claws, so many glowing red eyes staring him down with piercing yellow pupils. How he wasn’t at all himself. How he was lost to something more sinister. Possessed by a higher power.. An heir to an end.

Sonic feels the lump in his throat throb when he swallows, his eyes growing more and more misty again. And he doesn’t want to cry anymore, so he simply takes a deep breath and shuts them as he sighs it out.

“In the end, everything turned out okay. We got him back. That’s what’s important.” It’s obvious that Sonic isn’t going to go anymore into it. Not yet, anyway. Not right now. Shadow doesn’t push it..

Instead, he reaches a hand over slowly and lets the backs of his fingers ever so slightly brush against the blue hedgehog’s. Simply letting him know he’s there. That he’s not alone. Not back in whatever place this talk has taken him to.

The corner of Sonic’s lips curl upwards at that, sighing as his eyes open again to look back at Shadow. A bit teary, but not shedding anymore.

“So trust me when I say… My Shadow and I have quite literally been to hell and back, and I only love him more. Whatever your Sonic is thinking about you, it’s not that you’re not good. If anything, it’s that he’s not.”

Shadow frowns at that, brows furrowing in confusion at that response. Why would Sonic think he himself isn’t good?? That’s all that dumb hedgehog is is good.

Still, he doesn’t argue on this. Just stores this knowledge away for later to ponder and contemplate on.

Sonic’s hand reaches up then, plucking a tiny piece of petal from Shadow’s quills and smirking as he drops it between them. Shadow watches it flitter to the ground.

“...It sounds like we both are talking to the wrong alternate of each other..”

“Yeah,” Sonic huffs, his smile growing a bit tired and wary as his eyes lift back to Shadow’s, “I gotta agree with you on that one.”

[the-eclipsed-sun]

"Yeah, uh, I told him about what happened with Meg and.. now he's helping me plan to kick dad's ass. He still hates my guts, but less so I think. He.. also called me a puppy with leukemia. And a homeless twink. So I'm pretty sure he's just letting me stay there because he feels bad for me, which is sweet. He's a good guy, he's got a boyfriend who hopefully won't drown him in a bathtub (and if he does I'll snap his spine in half), and a bunch of really cool kids he's adopted."

The sound of wind chimes ring faintly in the wind, though there wasn’t any in sight. Suddenly, a winged figure appears before Apollo, standing precariously perched on an elevated surface. She withdraws a second pair of wings—sprouting from her head—to reveal her eyes, shining with a hint of… something like curiosity, before they widen in recognition. “…Apollo?”

- 🎐@calvalia

[Apollo chuckles softly, rubbing the back of his neck. He was littered with ichor soaked bandages, his blond hair was filthy, and the clothes he wore were covered in stains. He looked at Calvalia, his mismatched eyes worn with sleep deprivation and grief. His bow and quiver on his back looked a bit worse for wear as well.]

"Yeah, heh, it's me.. Apollo. How.. how are you?"

//I am in love with the concept of your character, she's so awesome! And your art is amazing!! I'm so not worthy of interacting with such a being!

[wilbyssoot]

I'm so disgusted, revolted, and disappointed.

Wilbur's lack of accountability and his trying to spin his "apology" to be all about him and his betterment is so fucking disrespectful.

This isn't about you, it's about Shelby and what you did—the pain you caused. I'm so sorry she had to deal with someone who turned out to be so horribly vile and toxic. I give all my love and support to Shelby, who I hope is doing well, as well as everyone else who has been mistreated by Wilbur.

[i-like-forcefem]

Hey so uh I wanted to ask about that candy bar you gave me at the Halloween party last night, I ate it before bed (it tasted really good) but when I woke up I started to notice some things. My voice sounds kinda softer and higher pitched than before, my body feels tingly and kinda soft, my hair looks a lot longer and fuller than I remember it being, and every time I look in the mirror I think I look thinner than before...my clothes feel uncomfortable...people have been saying I look and sound cute and every time they compliment me I start blushing...n-not that I'm in any pain, don't worry, it's just...uh...w-where did you get that candy bar from again?

Awwww, well cutie the bars are ones I make by with plenty of love, specially for Halloween and a secret recipe I can’t just share with anyone

But since you seem to enjoy them so much let’s make a little deal!

I’ll let you Trick or Treat everyday! Just come here with a new fun outfit everyday and you’ll never run out of candy bars!

That said the bars work the best if you eat them everyday (and they can have quite some withdrawal symptoms) and I only have you the first bar because your costume was so so adorable and cute and feminine, and just so you know you’ve set the standard now cutie!

If you want more candy bars you better come back in an even cuter outfit, and also make sure to walk here in broad daylight where everyone can see! No cars allowed, most of the fun from Halloween is that anyone can see your costume, so you do need the show off phase

Got it cutie? Good Girl! Now take one more bar as a free-bee and I expect you here in much more appropriate clothing tomorrow, if you want another bar of course

[reasonsforhope]

Heads up/warning that I'm going to start posting articles related to the Israel-Palestine War

I've worked really, really hard to keep my blog about positive news only, and that's going to continue - these posts will be only about good news related to the war.

Of which there really, really isn't much, so I don't know that there will be a lot of posts, but I will be posting articles about humanitarian aid reaching those who need it and actions that will prevent more lives from being taken.

I know that, no matter my position on the war, this is something that would be very controversial and make a lot of people upset, so I wanted to be explicit about my position on this - and my posting policy, which is not the same thing. I also wanted to give people a heads up because I know the war in general is really, really triggering for a lot of people right now, for a lot of different reasons. I'll be tagging all relevant posts, so if screening those out is something that you need to do, you can.

I have worked very hard to make this blog a space with only good news because I know how much it can matter to have just one place, if nowhere else, that you can count on to not give you emotional whiplash with horrible news. To know you have one place you can go where you are guaranteed not to see bad news that will send you into a tailspin. That's why I've had a policy of not including signal boosts or PSAs about tragedies, no matter what they are, on this blog. (I do post about some of that stuff, including the Israel-Palestine War, on my main blog, though. I consider this blog to be me trying to run a public service, basically, and so have specific policies for myself around that, including my editorial and fact-checking standards.)

I'm going to be honest, I was really, really hoping the war would end after a couple of weeks, which has historically not been uncommon for wars with/involving Israel.

But that's clearly not happening, and I can't keep not acknowledging what's happening on here, so, this post.

With that, I imagine people probably want to know my actual stance on the war, since that's what I'll be posting in accordance with.

So, here's the official stance of this blog:

Every time a civilian is killed, it is a tragedy; Every time a child is killed, it is a tragedy, no matter their nationality. I condemn all antisemitism and all Islamophobia.

I support all calls for a ceasefire, as well as demands that Israel immediately stop its repeated bombing of hospitals, ambulances, shelters (including UN shelters), and refugee camps.

There is no situation in which the repeated and/or intentional bombing of hospitals is justified.

There is no situation in which the repeated and/or intentional bombing of shelters or refugee camps is justified.

There is no situation in which the repeated and/or intentional bombing of ambulances is justified.

There is no situation in which the killing of children is justified. Yet more children have now been killed in Gaza than in all global conflict zones combined in each year since 2019.

There is no situation in which cutting off an entire country and/or territory's supply of food and water is justified.

Yes, this applies to every group involved in the war, including countries supplying either side, and any countries or non-state organizations who may yet join the fighting.

The initial Hamas attack on Israel was a tragedy. The continued Israeli bombardment and invasion of Palestine is also a tragedy.

Most of the things I post will be about aid reaching Palestinians or news about tangible, confirmed progress toward a ceasefire. I probably will not be posting good news posts about aid reaching Israel, unless it's explicitly and only humanitarian and/or barring drastic unforeseen changes in circumstance. This is because as of yesterday, November 7, the Palestinian death toll is over 10,000 to Israel's roughly 1,400 (only about 200 of whom have been killed in the past month, starting on October 8, aka outside of the initial attack by Hamas). At least 3,195 children have died in Gaza, 33 in the West Bank, and 29 in Israel.

The Palestinian death toll is nearly 8 times the Israeli death toll. The number of children killed is 110 times higher in Palestine than Israel. (Source for death toll here, ratios via calculator.) Every single one of those deaths is a tragedy - and there have been far, far too many tragedies this past month.

(On a related note, Israel stands very, very little chance of actually eliminating Hamas with this war. The US has attempted this same strategy and failed many times: the US failed to eliminate the communist/North Korean regime in the Korean War, which is technically still ongoing 70 years later; failed to eliminate the Viet Cong in the Vietnam War; failed to eliminate numerous groups of Iraqi insurgents in the Iraq War, which triggered Iraq's civil war; and failed to eliminate the Taliban in the Afghanistan War, even though that war lasted for literally 20 years. Afghanistan is once again under total Taliban control.)

The last thing we need is another 20 year war. The last thing we need is more civilian deaths. Bombing civilian settlements, as well as hospitals, shelters, and refugee camps are war crimes under international law, meaning that both Israel and Hamas have committed war crimes.

It's time for the war crimes to stop.

Humanitarian aid reaching civilians is good news, and I will be posting accordingly.

Ceasefire now.

[noxious-fennec]

It's pomegranate season :)

A redraw of this piece from around a year ago

[zuiz41]

IwaOi Sketch dump before new year 🧍‍♂️

[alicentflorent]

Alicent Hightower 🤝 Sansa Stark

Having their book counterparts agency stripped away from them and unnecessary scenes of SA being written for them instead