#where'd the beanie go?

[heresbasictwilight]

SHE NEEDS HER BEEFARONI!!!

@askalbinopie

[cvnntagious]

Have My Baby | C. Sturniolo

"where'd you come from, with all these statements? / only thing i wanna know is, can you have my baby." -chief keef

pairing : toxic!chris x fem!reader

summary : when a sweet date night with your boyfriend turns into arguing in the restaurant, chris wants to let you know he still loves you, even though he doesn't act like it most of the time.

warnings : use of y/n, mentions of cheating, arguing, swearing, use of bitch in a derogatory way, lowkey angst??, manipulation, smut, p in v, riding, talk of breeding, pet names (baby, princess, ma), 18+

a/n : please don't point out how i keep posting everything BUT the requests i've gotten… i also made a bot for this so enjoy

-love, your grandma cvnty ☆!

★━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━★

The fancy restaurant you sat in buzzed with chatter, lit with only the dim, warm lighting of the expensive glass-beaded chandeliers that hung from the ceiling. Chris set his menu down with a small, content sigh, smiling at you as he looked into your eyes. "Know that I want," He said simply, placing his hands in front of him on top of the menu, "You?"

You looked up from the menu, matching your boyfriends smile. "What're you getting?" You asked him before setting your menu down in front of you as well, still opened, "I'm a little stuck. Maybe we can share?"

The gesture could've been seen as some type of romantic 'Lady and the Tramp' scene, if it weren't for the underlying tension. You two had never been good together. The way you practically had to beg Chris for two days straight to take you out tonight said it all, and yet, you both sat disingenuously and played house day by day. Even so, all this fancy bullshit had only been enough to fool your boyfriends fans, but everyone else around you guys saw. They saw the way Chris' shitty antics affected you - How they'd caused you to vie for his attention in the same shitty ways he did yours.

There was a flicker of something you couldn't quite make out in Chris' eyes, but he maintained that same smile. "Pasta, like always. You don't like Alfredo," He answered, his tone sweet, making it so that no one around would notice the complaisant undertone like you could.

Of course he'd be like this, how stupid of you to assume he'd enjoy himself tonight. His attitude made you remember how silent he was while you got ready for your date after he finally agreed, only watching you get all dolled up while he wore his usual beanie and t-shirt. Your shoulders dropped when you caught the insincerity, eyes flicking to look at the menu once more as your smile faded. You took a minute to examine while Chris watched from across the table, opening your mouth to say something when you were ready, only to be cut off by the dinging notification on your phone.

Instantly, your head snapped to your phone not far from the menu, reaching to grab it. "Forgot to turn off my ringer." You gave him an uneasy chuckle, flipping the switch on the side of your phone.

"Who's texting you?" Chris asked, smile now gone and hands to the side of him when you looked up at him.

You sucked in a sharp breath before clicking the power button to check the contact. "My mom," You answered, hearing your phone buzz a few more times on the table.

"Seems important, you should text her back."

Hesitantly, to his wishes, you picked your phone off the table and unlocked it with your face. You clicked on messages to type a reply, feeling your phone being snatched from your hands before you could even read the texts for yourself. "Chris-"

He hummed as he read the messages, his face sour with your phone held up to it. "Baby pictures," He replied, sounding disappointed.

A huff left your mouth when you saw him going to type for you, making you reach over the table and snatch your phone from him. "The fuck?" Chris raised his voice a bit, causing people at surrounding tables to glance over.

"I'm not a cheater like you, asshole. Don't sound so down about it." You ignored the agitated charge in his tone as you tweaked your neck at him, speaking in a low tone and giving him an almost disgusted look.

Chris rolled his eyes, crossing his arms. "Oh please, don't be a bitch about stupid shit. I've never cheated and you know it." His tone was sassy, tongue prodding at his cheek.

The scoff that came from you was so bitter, it almost had Chris leaning over to spit the taste of it out of his mouth. "Only 'cause I caught you before you could actually meet up to fuck her." The blunt words caused a pain in his chest, though he'd never admit it. He kept his composure in front of you, not even flinching at the daggers your eyes threw at him.

He shook his head dismissively, looking up at the light fixtures above you two. "I can't stand you sometimes."

That instant click of your tongue he knew so well made Chris' eyes snap back to your face, knowing he'd really ticked you now. "Ya know what? I shouldn't have even forced you to take me out on a date for once," You stood from your seat, grabbing your belongings as calm as you could in hopes to not alert other people simply enjoying their meals, "I knew it was too much for you to handle. Especially in these times where you 'can't stand' me."

Chris watched with parted lips as you walked away from the table, stiletto heels clacking against the marble floors. You thanked the hostess, letting her know you wouldn't be dining here tonight in a sweet tone before turning to the door. It took a moment, but eventually Chris snapped back into reality, rushing out of the doors to catch up to you.

You already had your hand on the door handle of your car when he finally caught sight of you again, making him sigh in relief that you hadn't already taken off. Your eyes met his when he made it to the tail of your car, sighing before opening the front door. "Get in, you scrub," You demanded in fed up exasperation as you slid into the drivers seat.

━━★

The ride home had been silent, and it was no different for the walk into your house. You hung your purse up on the hooks nailed by the door, Chris walking past you and stopping at the bottom step with his hands in his pockets. Why didn't you just take him home and go back to your place? You hadn't a clue. You really had no intentions of talking things out— at least not tonight.

There were many things you didn't have a clue about. Like why you hadn't left him back when you guys were seventeen, when he'd hid you and played with your feelings all the way up until he realized he could brag about you when he started doing YouTube. You could've really put your foot down when you guys were eighteen and he'd told you he could never love you. You should've told him to fuck off back when you were nineteen and caught him practically sexting multiple other girls for the first time. But now he's twenty, all rich and famous, dragging you out to LA with him and his brothers, and he doesn't even feel the need to show any sort of appreciation for everything you do for him.

"You look gorgeous," He mumbled as you walked past him, making your way up his stairs with tall heels on, to which he wrapped an arm around your waist from behind to guide you.

The stinging from you swatting him away from you was nothing compared to the stinging way you'd walked out of the date you so desperately pleaded with him for because he couldn't manage one peaceful night with his girlfriend. "I don't need your help." You placed your hand on the wall as you picked up your pace to walk a few steps ahead of him.

Chris sighed, slowly but surely trailing behind you. By the time you'd made it to the stairwell leading down to his room, he'd just made it to the top of the stairs at the entrance, searching your irritated face as you rounded the corner. His pace picked up significantly when he saw you take the first step down without even thinking to take your shoes off, afraid you'd fall or something. He grabbed you again, this time hooking your arm on his. "Please," He said gently, not wanting you to push him away this time.

Again, you huffed, reluctantly allowing him to guide you down the stairs like he was some gentleman, though you knew he wasn't. "I'm so tired of you." You started, unable to help yourself. You were just so frustrated with him all the time.

His eyes on the ground, Chris licked his lips at your words, genuinely ashamed of himself for tonight. "I know, baby," He assured you, surprising you when his words came out remorseful, "I know."

"Don't 'baby' me, you ruin everything," You continued on, ranting out of a mix of sadness and anger. "What am I? Just some girl you flaunt to a camera as if you're some awesome, amazing boyfriend?"

He looked up at you, eyes drooping like a child being scolded as he opened his bedroom door for you. "I love you." He simply replied as he let go of you, voice barely above a whisper.

You walked into his room freely, finally taking your shoes off. "Every time you start some stupid 'I love you' shit, I physically cringe," You began an almost entirely new rant, Chris grabbing your heels from your hands to set them neatly aside as he listened intently, "Because, fuck, I love you, but I'll never ever believe you feel the same after what you said to me years ago."

"So was I. And now what? You're gonna say you didn't mean it?" You cut him off, "Even freshly eighteen, I'd never say some stupid shit like that to put you down, whether I meant it or not."

Chris hummed as he turned back to you, "I was young-"

"So was I. And now what? You're gonna say you didn't mean it?" You cut him off, "Even freshly eighteen, I'd never say some stupid shit like that to put you down, whether I meant it or not."

"You don't understand," He took a few steps closer, "Y/n, I'd do anything for you."

You crossed your arms as you looked at him, not buying it. "Oh, I'm sure you would, Christopher."

The sigh he let out at your sarcasm actually caused you to snap out of your angry haze for a moment, feeling a bit sorry for him for some reason. Of course, he had this chewing out coming for quite some time now, but you'd never expected yourself to be so blunt about everything out of nowhere. "you're just so much better than me," He said in a defeated tone, features soft as he looked you up and down.

At any other given moment, he would've said that in such a condescending tone, but it was almost as if he didn't have it in him to pick and egg on the argument like normal. "I want nothing than to spend the rest of my life with you," He breathed, stepping closer to wrap his arms around you, resting his head on your shoulder.

"Chris, what're you-"

He cut you off with a kiss, much more gentle than any kiss you'd ever gotten from him before. His fingers made his way up to underneath your chin, lifting it to move the kiss from your lips to underneath your jaw. "We could do so much together," He picked up his head, hands sliding under your cute, flowey shirt, "We should've done so much more together by now."

You looked at him with a confused expression, like you were unsure of if he was being serious or not. "I wanna start a family with you," He punctuated his words with kisses down your neck, "And get married. All that sappy shit."

"You're such a fake," You replied as he gently pushed you down on his bed. This, like other times, had to be some sort of manipulation to keep you from leaving, and deep down you knew it. Yet, for some reason, you always ended up letting him have his way with you. Of course, the sex was good, but was it good enough to endure the torture of Chris Sturniolo himself?

Even so, when your boyfriend crawled on his bed to attach his lips to yours from above you, you opened your legs for him to slip himself between. Chris groaned when you reached your hand around his neck to play with the tufts of hair just at the base of his skull, ultimately pulling his kiss in deeper. "A fake?" He feigned offense, "You have no idea how i really see you."

"A little hard when you claim to hate me." You forced out a chuckle, shifting uncomfortablely benath your boyfriend.

Chris sucked in through his nose. "Don't be like that," He breathed before allowing his head to dip just under your chin, peppering kisses along your exposed collarbone.

You rolled your eyes, chin subconsciously lifting to give him better access. His motions only served to dampen your panties. Your hand rose to fall into his soft curls, massaging tenderly at his scalp. Chris groaned at the contact, lips exploring your body in slothish motions. He was in no rush.

Finally, he lifted his head again, kissing you so quick and gently that it'd almost felt like he caressed your lips with his. He wasted no time in sitting up against the headboard, pulling you onto his lap in that same motion. "Healthy or not, I could do this every day," He said softly, reaching up to brush his thumb over your cheek, "And this-" He didn't finish his sentence, hands roaming down the fabric of your dress in admiration.

He was so right— The problem is that this wasn't healthy. But fuck did you guys know how to forgive each other, with as much as you knew how to get on each others nerves. You exhaled softly at his words, somehow feeling content by them. Your arms wrapped around his neck, resting on his shoulders, "Sad to say I could too."

"I know."

With that, he grabbed your ass and lifted it from his lap, then letting go to unbuckle his jeans. He pulled them and his boxers down simultaneously, freeing the erection you hadn't even yet noticed. He wasn't interested in fully undressing himself, and he wasn't interested in undressing you at all. With how sexy you looked all dressed up for your guys' date? There was no way in hell. He reached to bunch your dress up at your waist, fingers dipping to press against the wet spot on the fabric of your panties. "Perfect, you can't resist me," He hummed out, lifting you over his aching cock.

"I can," You tried to fight back, only for your argument to be diminished by the way he ran his tip through your folds, eliciting a whimper from you.

You practically broke down on top of him, your legs on either side of his as you held onto his shoulders for support. He allowed the head of his cock to tease your aching clit and dripping entrance to no end, making you unable to hold back the pants the soft caressing on it forced out of you with your face now buried in his neck. "Chris," You whined, causing him to chuckle.

His hand let go of the base of his dick, gripping your hips to plop you down onto him with a hiss. You yelped at the way he'd filled you up so quickly, trembling a bit in his grasp. "Stay still, okay ma? G'na fuck a baby into you," He demanded, voice gruff with lust, "You'll know I'm fa'real then."

At that, he began thrusting into you, agonizingly slow as he sucked in through his perfectly straight teeth. You looked down between your bodies, lips parting to let out more sporadic pants of pleasure. Impatience took over him, beginning to thrust into you at a faster and rougher pace. By then, full moans escaped your lips, unable to contain them as he fucked you so good.

He grunted as your jaw went slack, his pace almost animalistic. He was never one for wasting time. He needed to cum. What other way would you carry his child if not for him shooting his warm seed into you? Surely your favorite panties would be soiled by the end of this, and you'd be lucky to keep your dress nice.

w/c : 2.7k taglist : @m4ttsmunch @mattsnumberonehoe @k4yd1 @sturnobsessedwh0re (lmk If you wanna be added!)

[crabonfire]

I wish you could see yourself the way I see you.

Character: Demoman

Type: Fluff, Romantic

Warnings: None

Note:

Partially back, love you demo

♡♡♡

Demo was always drunk. Drunk on the battlefield, drunk on ceasefire days, drunk at night and slightly hungover in the morning. Slightly, because he's used to the headache and throw ups.

Though you found it concerning, you knew this was some part of him that would probably never leave him. He made sure to tell you that too, as it was a permanent habit stuck to his routine.

But he found that he'd drink less and less the more he spent time with you, because he didn't want to forget about your experiences together.

Today he was in a slump. Tavish was always an insecure man, even if it wasn't obvious to most people, he was. He found himself with a disgusted look as he looked into the mirror, so he never did.

Though, you always noticed. He'd always focus on you while you were together, but you'd catch glimpses of him being awkward or laugh at the compliments you give of his physical look.

And for some reason today, his insecurity rose high.

You were worried, he wasn't as active today, which, you had no problem with since he can do whatever he wants but it was unusual to say the least. He didn't talk to you either after the matches had finished, and your team won! But, he didn't seem to care.

You found him in his room, slumped over the bed, snoring, with a bottle of unfinished scrumpy in his hand. You walked in quietly, closing the door behind you. You didn't want to wake his sleeping self, so you took the scrumpy out of his hands, placing it on the bedside table, and very carefully, you pushed his body up onto the bed, lying him down.

You took his beanie off, and his eyepatch too, it couldn't have been comfortable to sleep with. You admired his face for a moment, wiping the excess drool he had on his face with your sleeve, you smile at him.

You didn't know what he meant when he told you he found himself unattractive. He was so handsome, so...pretty. You leaned, sitting by him on the bed, your hand stroking his hair as you admired him.

You leaned a kiss to his forehead, before getting up.

When you did, he took your hand absentmindedly. You turned to look at him, and he seemed to be half asleep and half awake. He looked at you groggily, as if trying to see who you were. When he registered your face, his gaze softened, and he smiled at you sleepily. He seemed to be only slightly intoxicated, so it seemed he didn't drink that much.

"Lamb, what were you doing?"

You mirrored his smile, replying softly.

"I wanted to check up on you."

You shifted, sitting back on the bed. His hand that held your wrist moved to entertwine his fingers in yours. His thumb rubbed the back of your knuckles as his smile widened at that. He stared sleepily at the sight of your hands together.

He hummed in reply, his voice was low and slightly raspier than usual, he looked so peaceful and that made your heart skip a beat. He stared up at you with such a fond expression, like his heart skipped the same way.

"You look nice today, lass / lad."

You smiled and furrowed your eyebrows in amusement.

"I look how I do everyday, Demo."

He nodded, "Yeah."

His face shifted to lie comfortably on the pillow, fingers still entertwined, but then he feels softness of the fabric, confused, and suddenly, very shocked at the abscence of his eyepatch. He turned back to you, and frowned slightly.

"Where'd my eyepatch go?"

He asked, eyebrows raised. You titled your head, other hand reaching to caress his hair again.

"I took it off, I didn't think sleeping with an eyepatch would've been comfortable."

You noticed how his frown stayed and you hummed, "I hope that's okay, I just wanted you to sleep well."

It took a moment for him to reply, but he simply nodded. But now he didn't seem to look at you, a confusing look on his face. You know what this was about and you smiled at him sweetly,

"You look nice today, too."

I mumble, drawing his attention back to me.

"You look nice everyday but, like this, I get to admire you all to myself and it makes me realise how pretty you are."

His frown disappeared and he looked at you with an embarrassed look, before he smirked, and snickered, and started to laugh.

"Haha, don't joke with me lass / lad."

You shook your head, not returning his laugh and smiling genuinely. "Tavish, I'm serious." He stopped his laugh, but there was an amused smile on his face, as if he still didn't believe you.

"You're beautiful, Tav."

That got him, he looked away and scoffed, eyebrows furrowed in embarrassment, though his lips were still curled in a smile, he let out another chuckle. You frowned, "Demo." He looked up at you and smirked, "What?"

You shook your head, leaning in, and leaving soft kisses all over his face. You started at his jaw, his nose, to his cheeks, kissing his forehead, and not forgetting to leave short kisses to his temples. You pulled back to smile at him, so lovingly, so fondly, that he found himself start to sober up, his heart racing quickly.

"You're gorgeous, Tav. It's a real shame that you can't seem to believe that."

Your voice was quiet and soft, as your hand caressed his face, your thumb rubbing his cheek, right under his eye. He looked at your hand and reached up to push it further to his cheek, and he grasped your hand.

"I hope one day you'll be able to see yourself the way I see you."

He returned your gaze, and sighed, tilting his head to leave a gentle kiss to your palm, then to your wrist, before chuckling, a sweet one this time.

"Yer gonna be the death of me, [Y/N]."

You chuckled in reply, you two sat in silence for a while, enjoying each others company, before he pulled you over and lied you down, you hugged him tightly as his face was nuzzled in your chest, your hands rested on his back, rubbing gently, and he wouldn't be able to admit it right now, but your words had taken a toll on how he viewed himself.

Oh, how he loved you.

♡♡♡

[hannahhook7744]

Stormbringer Crew Incorrect Quotes (Part 5);

Harry Hook: You fight like my sister!

Luke Tremaine-Westergaard, being a smart ass: I've fought your sisters. That's a compliment!

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Barnaby Teach, son of Black Beard *Jumps out of nowhere* We meet again!

Hannah Hook: I saw you three hours ago!

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Hannah Hook: Hello Captain Beardless.

Barnaby: I TOLD YOU TO STOP CALL ME THAT!

Hannah Hook: And I told you to pick on someone your own age.

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Hannah Hook, drunk on soda: I'm telling you man, she digs ya.

Luke Tremaine-Westergaard, also drunk on soda, groans: Another graveyard joke?

Hannah: Shut up, we both know you thought it was funny.

Luke: And we both know you have a thing for the prince of Arendelle yet you haven't done anything.

Hannah: Don't throw stones in glass houses.

Luke: That's not even how that saying goes!

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Darcy *stares at all nine of her siblings, who are gathered in the 'med room' suspiciously* What do you want?

Alex, playing with a knife: You gotta help us doc, we've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas

Darcy: Help you with WHAT?

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River Le Beak, holding his beanie to his chest as he stands on a sinking rowboat: Looks like we've shivered our last Timbers, mateys.

Hannah, shooting him a disgusted look: I'm revoking your pirate card.

River, gasping dramatically and hugging Luke: No captain! Please, anything but that!

Luke, playing along: Not the pirate card! What are you gonna do next? Give us the black spot?

Skia, glares with water up to her ankles: if she doesn't, I will.

Zee, five inches away on the dock: You guys know you can just step onto the docs right?

All *shushes her*

Zee, looks to Peachy and Remi: would it be a mutiny if I tossed a cannon ball in their rowboat to make it go down quicker?

Peachy: YES!

Remi, grabbing his guitar: Oh there once was a row boat that went to sea, that got on the wrong side of a pirate named Zee~~

*Dodges rotten tomato*

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Joy Foxworth, pointing at Tulip with a squirt gun: You've yeed your last haw!

Tulip, pointing back at her with own squirt gun: No I haven't, partner.

Hannah Hook, baffled from the tree, forgetting she's supposed to be hiding: WHAT LANGUAGE ARE YOU GUYS SPEAKING?!

Peter Pan, sprays her with a water cannon filled with something that is not water causing her to fall out of the tree: COWBOY!

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Random AK: Having Vks in Auradon is all fun and games until they're on the opposing dodgeball team!

Kyle White: That sounds like a skill issue to me.

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Amira: YOU FOUGHT WHOMST WITH A WHAT WHEN YOU WERE HOW OLD?!

Hannah, confused: What are you referring to?

Amira: Aziz said you told him a story about your childhood—

Hannah, realizing what she's talking about: Oh I stabbed a kidnapper with a fork when I was three.

Amira: YOU WERE NEARLY KIDNAPPED?!

Hannah: Yeah, hasn't everyone nearly been kidnapped at one point?

Amira: NO!

Hannah, not believing her: Oh sure. Next thing you're gonna tell me is that there isn't a Creeps Peak and Cannibal Cove everywhere-

Amira: THERE'S NOT-

Hannah: And that not everyone gets death threats as children-

Amira, eye twitching: Stay here, I need to go take my Tiger for a walk to Beast Castle.

Hannah*laughing* That's a funny joke Amira- hey where'd she go?

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Tulip Rossi, Zee Snoops, Evie, and Luke Tremaine-Westergaard: SURPISE MAKEOVER!!

Hannah Hook, running: NO NO NO NO!

Luke: YOU CAN'T OUTRUN US FOREVER!

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Hannah, half asleep and looking through her spy glass: SWOGGLE MY EYES IT'S MERMAIDS!

Moxie, amused: Describe 'em.

Hannah: There's a tan one with a gold and black tail that looks like sequins and one with a blue and black tail and an afro, a buoy grave, and a baby one-

Rian Frankenstein-Van Helsing, not even bothering to look up from his marine biology book: That's just Misty, River, Shania, and Toby, captain.

Hannah, embarrased: Oh.

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Hannah at 3am: Do you guys think other types of bending exist that were forgotten to history? Like bone bending?

Luke at the end of the bed: I think that's just breaking bones.

Drizella, who came to check on Luke: When on earth did you get here?

Hannah: about 11?

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Luke: Hey Darcy, are you Christmas? Because I wanna marry you.

Darcy:

Luke: I'm guessing that's a no until I propose in a non corny way?

Darcy, nodds:

Hannah off screen: I told you she was gonna say no if you did it that way!

Luke: SHHH!

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Kyle, in a silly voice: Yarr, I be a pirate, maties. Arrrg!

Hannah, looking at him as if he just shit in her cereal: I can't belive you've done this.

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Moxxie laying on a beanbag: Christmas gets so much harder the older you get. What do you want for Christmas? I don't know! Financial security? To not almost die for a week? Socks? I don't know! What about you guys?

Rian: I want to be as smart as I was before I got brought back to life.

Eduardo Frollo: My father dead.

Parker McLeach: A gun.

Hannah: To be normal.

Haul Bjorgman: My depression to go away.

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Hook: Okay which one of you gave my daughter a real golden sword and who taught her slang?

Hades, drinking out of a gauntlet: She won a ship, I thought she deserved a reward.

Hook: Did you teach her the slang?!

Morgie: What slang did she use?

Uliana, amused: And how does this slang relate to the sword?

Hook: She named it the nut slicer!

Hades *does a spit take*

Persephone *chokes on her cereal*

*Meanwhile elsewhere, Maleficent can be heard cackling*

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Hannah, near tears: Alex I did something terrible!

Alex, the son of Helga Sinclair and Hades: Don't worry, I have a shovel! *Taps ground with shovel*

Hannah, vaguely terrified: Wait what? What do you think I did?

Alex, a mad glint in his eye and a wild smile on his face: It doesn't matter because no one will ever find out.

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Kidnapper: We have your son.

Haul, confused: I don't have a son.

Kidnapper: Then whose watering and talking to my plants while blasting heavy metal music?

Haul: Oh my god you have Noah. His siblings are going to kill you.

Kidnapper: Hey buddy don't you threaten me.

Haul: I'm not threatening, I'm warning-

*A loud crash rings out over the phone followed by glass breaking, swearing, and screaming*

Darcy: Hey Haul.

Haul: Hey Darcy, Hannah told me to tell you and the guys to be at the ship tonight because we're having a party.

Darcy: Will be there.

*Phone hangs up*

Haul: Well I did warn them.

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Olivia, Gaston's daughter: In hindsight, having an abusive parent is funny because it's like 'Daddy why you have beef with me, I'm literally three years old and I love you'.

Eduardo, Frollo's son: Ugh, don't remind me. One time my dad yelled at me for drawing too loud.

Luke, confused: How do you draw too loud?

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Darcy: I've got a date with destiny and it ain't gonna end with a kiss.

Noah, confused: Who's destiny?

Darcy: It's just an expression, brother.

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Hans: We have a front door you know.

Hannah, who came in through Luke's window like normal: I know.

Hans *sighs*

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Noah: MY CABBAGES!

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The kids in Hannah's crew: I wanna be just like you when I grow up!

Twenty year old Hannah, suddenly getting flashbacks to every dangerous thing she's ever done *spit take*

Hannah, internally: NO GODS, PLEASE. GODS NO!

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Elara's birth parents *try to take their daughter back after abandoning her on the barrage and causing her to grow up on the isle*

Hannah, pushes the elf girl behind her and glares: SHE'S NOT YOURS, SHE'S MINE!

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Hannah *shooting up in her bed in the middle of the night and accidentally knocking Skia, Luke, and River who she was having a sleepover with out of it*

Luke: OW!

Skia: Hey!

River: Hannah, what the hell?

Hannah, getting horrible flashbacks to her family's partners violent attempts to flirt: HAVE MACON WEST AND OLGA HEARTS BEEN FLIRTING WITH ME THIS WHOLE TIME?!

*Momentarily silence followed by a loud explosion of noise as the other three question if that is the case*

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Hannah: When I was younger I used to set toilet paper on fire and flush it down the toilet for fun and only stopped because I burnt the seat.

Eduardo Frollo: Again, weird but not a sin.

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Luke: One time when I was a kid the toaster caught fire, so I went over to my dad who was arguing with my grandmother and tugged on his sleeve for six minutes till I had his attention and calmly told him the toaster was on fire.

Hannah: Oh yeah I remember that. He was all like 'WHAT? AHHH!' and your grandma asked why we didn't say anything lol.

Kyle: why do you remember that?

Hannah: Oh I was there.

Kyle: ?

Hannah, fondly sighs: Good times.

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Lady Tremaine, impatiently: And if I wanted to sit around all day going nowhere, I’d be a teacher!

Luke, fed up *hits the gas and starts driving recklessly* Got it.

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Lady Tremaine to Luke: You’re not fit to be king of … name a place

Luke: and you're not fit to be a mother, let alone a hair stylist.

*five minutes later*

Luke runs and hides behind Drizella: MOM! GRANDMA'S TRYING TO KILL ME!

-----------------------------------------

Lady Tremaine, regarding Luke: My third biggest fear: He brings home a whore and says, ‘We’re married!’ Oh, and the whore has bangs.

Darcy: I'm literally right here.

Lady Tremaine, drinking: And I wish you weren't.

Darcy: And I wish you were dead but we can't all have what we want.

-----------------------------------------

Luke: Your point being- *freezes in horror*

Hannah *staring at him wide eyed*

Haul: Uh... What's wrong?

Luke, screaming: I'M TURNING INTO MY GRANDMOTHER!

-----------------------------------------

Luke: You know, when I was little I used to pretend you weren't my grandmother.

Lady Tremaine: Me too.

[viktheviking1]

Octavia’s reaction to Asmodeus

Loona and Via sat crouched by the door, listening to Blitz and Stolas on the otherside. "We're trapped in a h*rny prison!" Blitz shouted from inside.

“Those two would be given a life sentence.” Via smirked at Loona, who was now happily hogging all the popcorn.

Loona munched as she talked, “Absolutely! They are by far the horniest people I know.”

“Well, you’ve clearly never been to Lust.” Ozzie said as he approached from around the corner.

“Oh, the chicken’s back-” Loona started.

“Lord Asmodeus!” Via stood up suddenly, dusting herself off. She started, to curtsey, realized she wasn’t in a long dress, fumbled a bit, and ended up bending slightly at the waist, hoping it would suffice.

"Asmo-wha . . .?" Loona mumbled. She had met him earlier, but hadn't learned his name.

Ozzie smiled at Via's attempt at being proper and ruffled her hair and beanie, "Octavia! I haven't seen you since you still had down! How you been?"

Via took off her hat to adjust her hair, then put it back on, "I, Uh- I'm fine."

Loona stood up and leaned on  Via's shoulder, "You mind catching me up on what's going on here."

"Oh, uh, Loona this is Asmodeus, the embodiment of lust. And Asmodeus, this is Loona, Blitz's . . . roommate?" Via trailed off.

"And receptionist. Good to meet you properly." Loona stuck out her hand, and Via tried not to visibly cringe at the incorrect social conduct.

Ozzie took the handshake without missing a beat, "Charmed! Are you young ladies enjoying the show?"

"Yeah, where'd you guys go earlier?" Loona leaned fully onto Via's head, who pushed her off, only mildly annoyed.

"Oh, we're just on the other side of the building, prepping some things." He smiled knowingly, "Just wanted to say hi to Stolas's pride and joy. Still can't believe how tall you are now. You training with the astro magic . . . Doohickey?"

"Yeah, the grimoire . . . Dad's teaching me some things. . ." Via rubbed her arm nervously.

Asmodeus had been holding a walkie talkie, which had been silent, but now Fizzarolli's voice came through, "Ozzzzzie! Come baaaaack! I'm boooorrreed!"

Asmodeus sighed, and crouched down to eye level to the Via, "Sorry, I've got to go, but listen, I can't imagine how rough your family life is right now. I'm honestly surprised you're cool with all this. And I know you don't really know me, or I you, but if there's ever anything I can do for you, call me, okay?"

Ozzie produced a small business card, and Via took it, looking the artistic details on both sides, which looked like beautiful design at a glance, but upon closer inspection, included d*cks in the intricate designs.

"Ozzzzzzzzziiiiiiieeeee! I can't trash talk Blitz by myself, I need an audience!!! Come laugh at my jooookkkesss!" Fizz's voice whined.

"Alright, I'd better get back, before I upset the Misses." Asmodeus bowed to them both, and turned into a blue flame, floating away.

The two stood there in silence for a moment, before Loona said, " . . . Wow . . . The deep-fried, feathered d*ckhead is a deadly sin."

I imagined Via's relationship with Ozzie to be that of like a great uncle or your dad’s cousin’s husband. Someone you might see at extended family reunions, and maybe hear about in family stories, but you’ve only actually met in person like 4 times, and 2 of those was before you were old enough to remember. But they remember fondly being there when you were 2 and played in a toilet that one time, so you’ve gotta accept their love for you; even if you know more about your local underpaid baristas who you see briefly once or twice a week, than them. That's my headcanon, anyway.

Read more funny antics on The Pompous and the Prick:

[coulsons-fullmetal-cellist]

Night Eggscapades

Featuring Pedro the Easter Bunny!

Does this count as fanfiction? Maybe. This is my take on Pedro as the Easter Bunny. I was definitely inspired by Narcos. I've done this in the style of a film script as it felt the best use of this crazy idea.

Warnings: typical action violence, some swearing, smoking, Pedro being a rabbit(?)

EXT-WARE HOUSE IN UNKNOWN JUNGLE-NIGHT

A truck is being loaded up by a bunch of goons. It is unclear what is in the boxes they are loading but judging by the time and location, it can be assumed that it is not legal.

A smartly dressed man in a hat is yelling at his goons, making them hurry their activity.

HAT MAN: (in Spanish) Hurry! Hurry! We have a schedule to keep here

One of the goons loading the truck stops what he's doing and looks into the distance

GOON: (in Spanish) Someone's coming!

The light reveals a lost looking man wandering over to them. He is wearing a beanie which seems out of place in the warm climate.

BUCK: Excuse me? Excuse me?

HAT MAN: (to himself) What the hell?

BUCK: (in broken Spanish) My car broken. Do you have a telephone?

He mimes a telephone with his hands. HAT MAN scoffs at this, clearly it's some stupid tourist who's gotten lost and his body will easily be disposed of.

HAT MAN: No telephone

The Hat Man's second in command wanders over to stand next to him. He is holding a dangerous looking gun

SECOND: (in Spanish) Who is this idiot?

HAT MAN: Some stupid tourist. Just dump his body in the usual spot

SECOND: Sure thing. Probably too stupid to notice. Who wears a beanie in the middle of the jungle?

BUCK: (in English) Oh the beanie is just to protect my ears

They both realise that this man understands them. They both stop and look at this man.

BUCK scratches the back of his head and wanders over to the truck. Everyone is too confused to do anything.

BUCK: (in Spanish) So what have you got in here?

He takes a sniff of the air and hops up into the back of the truck. A goon who is in the back of the truck looks almost frightened and moves away. BUCK opens one of the boxes and takes out an object. He hops back down and walks over to the Hat Man and his second. In his hand is a foil wrapped Easter Egg which he is sniffing like a wine connoisseur.

BUCK: (in Spanish) Corn syrup, vegetable oil, bare minimum cocoa and lots of artificial flavours. Oh, and what's this?

He opens the egg to reveal a bag of white material. All the goons start getting their weapons ready.

BUCK: Really? You trying to smuggle drugs in kids Easter Eggs? You can't smuggle in Kinder Eggs so you think you can smuggle in these eggs? Oh, the kids will be so disappointed.

All the goons point their guns at him. BUCK looks amused, shrugs his shoulders and suddenly jumps away. Everyone looks shocked as no one can jump that high.

RANDOM GOON: Where'd he go?

HAT MAN: Find him! Kill him! I want his body now!

Everyone starts searching around the truck and surrounding area. The lighting makes it harder to find anything at all.

One GOON has wandered by himself to one side of the truck. He hears a loud noise behind him. He quickly turns around for him to see BUCK, who puts his fingers to his lips and lifts his fist.

A small noise is heard which alerts the other goons. They slowly move towards the sound. A shadow is seen behind the one at the back of the group who grabs him and drags him off.

This happens until the group is down to one goon who realises that he's alone. He is terrified as he turns around. There is no one there. The shadow that has been taking everyone out returns behind this remaining goon. Hands come around this guys mouth and drags him away into the dark.

HAT MAN and his SECOND are standing by themselves. They realise that none of the goons have returned and that they must face this threat on their own. The light reveals BUCK returning from his escapades.

HAT MAN, who is clearly a coward, pushes SECOND in front of him, trying to protect himself from this unknown threat.

HAT MAN: Get him!

SECOND moves towards BUCK. This man is clearly more experienced in fighting. He takes a few swipes at BUCK. A good fight is put up. BUCK seems almost impressed that he has a worthy adversary and even takes a few punches. One attack lands close to BUCK'S head and SECOND grabs at his beanie.

A scene is shown of SECOND looking at the beanie in his hand. He looks up and is confused and horrified.

BUCK looks nonchalant as it is revealed that his beanie has been hiding a pair of rabbit ears. They twitch in accordance with the expression on his face. He just shrugs while SECOND is looking at the ears.

BUCK: Guess that rabbit is out of the burrow

He lands a hard blow to SECOND who hasn't had time to defend himself. He promptly falls down hard. BUCK shakes his hand and walks towards HAT MAN.

HAT MAN is at the peak of scared and tries to slowly walk backwards but trips and ends up just crawling away. BUCK is casually walking towards him.

BUCK: It's people like you who bring a downer on the happy population.

He gets up close and personal to the face of HAT MAN. BUCK reaches into the mans pockets, revealing a set of matches and a rather nice looking cigar. He nods in appreciation and pats the man on the shoulder.

BUCK: Don't worry bud. I'll make sure these cheap ass, barely approved chocolates won't go near the mouth of a single child.

BUCK stands up, putting the cigar in his mouth. He lights it and throws the still lit match into the truck. The contents magically set alight in a wild blaze of fire. BUCK retrieves his beanie and tucks it into his pocket. He walks away from the fire engulfed truck happily smoking his cigar.

HAT MAN looks at his truck and is sad at his loss of cargo. He turns to the man who destroyed his livelihood.

HAT MAN: (out loud to himself) Who the fuck was that guy?

[daggerandpotion]

6 and 11? x

(from the book asks)

6 (what i read this month) - March was a strong month for me books wise! I read Witchcraft and the Gay Counterculture by Arthur Evans (has some powerful, interesting and relevant ideas, if held back by some discredited scholarship), The Lathe of Heaven by Ursula K. Le Guin (damn my girl ursula can write! hit it out of the park as usual. very antipsych), H is for Hawk by Helen Macdonald (it was poetic and tender), The Power of Cute by Simon May (dude kinda has no idea what hes talking about in some cases but the stuff about cute/grotesque was interesting), Liarmouth by John Waters (it's... A Lot), and Where'd You Go, Bernadette by Maria Semple (surprisingly funny! we love family drama!)

11 (non fiction books i enjoy) - Oh I love nonfiction! I try to read about 50% nonfiction each year but I find I'm usually more in the mood for it in the summer. Some recs include: The Great Beanie Baby Bubble by Zac Bissonette (pure investigative journalism and a WILD story. camp.), The Tragedy of Heterosexuality by Jane Ward (it really is so sad), essentially anything by David Graeber (changed how i see the world, may he rest in peace), and recently this history of textiles called The Fabric of Civilization which was just fascinating. I could keep going, theres so many, these are just the first few that came to mind

[worldofl0re]

"So, remind me -- I must've forgotten, who would get custody of your son?" I asked. Their eyes both widened slightly, and their curled lips slacked a little. I knew for a certainty that not a word was mentioned of the boy who cowered behind them, staring at the back of their heads in anticipation.

"Oh. She can have him," the father said, dismissively. I glanced over at the mother. I could watch her reaction in slow-motion, seeing her eyes narrow and her mouth disfigure into a snarl. She was about to argue that her child not go to her.

I was faster, though.

"Alright, let's take a recess. When we reconvene, we can circle back to the, ah-" I turned a few pages in the documents on my desk, "-beanie baby collection."

That seemed to sate them, and the two stood up, and promptly walked out of the court. They didn't even notice their son hiding behind them. I sighed, and pinched my brow, before I looked at the boy myself.

"Hey there," I said to him. He meekly waved back to me, and I stood up from my desk, circling around it and sitting in one of the chairs in front of my desk, where his parents just sat.

"You want a sucker?" I asked, procuring one of those little suckers from inside my sleeve. He looked at me.

"I'm too old for those..." He said, trying to be as quiet and small as can be. I just smiled. Kids weren't a rare sight in here, but they were usually half his age. Even so, he was only twelve.

"You're never too old for a sucker, not even me," and I summoned another sucker from my sleeve -- one of those mystery flavors, and unwrapped it, popping it into my mouth.

The boy seemed a little more eager, and took the seat next to me, where his mother's lawyer was, and took the sucker.

"You know," I said to him, "us judges can do magic."

"No you can't. I'm not seven," the boy said, already crunching and chewing on his sucker.

"Oh really?"

I took out a quarter from a pocket beneath my robe, and started doing some tricks with it, tossing it between my palms and balancing it on my fingers until-

It vanished.

"Where'd that go?" I asked, grinning.

"Into your palm," the boy said.

I then showed him my hands, and even inside my sleeves, but he couldn't find it. He was a little intrigued.

"Oh, what's this?"

I then reached behind his ear, and pulled out the coin, showing it to him. The little kid was gobsmacked, his jaw hanging open. I started giggling.

"How did you do that?!" The boy asked, his eyes bright for the first time I ever saw in three days.

"I guess you're a little too old to be tricked by magic. Let me show you..."

And I taught him the trick, and the other coin tricks I showed him. He was truly excited, and when his parents returned, he was entirely absorbed by trying to do coin tricks.

And that was how I met my adoptive son.

You’re a judge assigned in a divorce case. Both former spouses have been fighting fiercely for three days to get full custody… of the family dog. They have not once mentioned their 12-year-old son, who watches everything from behind, looking defeated.

[heresbasictwilight]

invited U too my Banan restaurant on a remote island

Who knew magically enhanced banana's could make for such good transport?

[ghost-is-bae]

Xavier Plympton Imagine- winter special

Summary : When you catch a chest infection on Christmas eve, your lovely boyfriend has to look after you over the celebrative period but he really doesn't mind :)

Warnings: In detail description of a chest infection, but that's it! Just pure fluff!

~

~

The winter months never seemed to bother Xavier. He would just wrap up in colourful hoodies and jackets, whereas you were just ill every damn day of December. It was like a Christmas curse. The first week you end up with a runny and red nose, the second week you end up with a really sore throat and the week leading up to Christmas. Well, It's a fucker. You end up with clogged ears, a headache, blocked sinuses and a killer chest infection.

Lucky for you, It was the same this year. Apart from the fact that you almost ended up in A&E because of the severity of it. Poor Xavier had to look after you for a whole month! Today started off the same for you. You woke up with a banging headache and you couldn't hear anything. You tried to sigh but ended up in a large, ferocious coughing fit. "Baby, are you okay?" Xavier's muffled voice rang through your ears as his warm hands glided gently over your arms that were caged in your thick, fluffy pyjamas.

"Yeah...I'm okay. It's just the weather." You voice came out very nasally and congested which made Xavier's heart ache. He knew how much this time of year affected you and he knew that he couldn't do anything about it. "Do you want me to book you a doctor's appointment?" you shook your head slowly, "I'll be alright. You need to get ready for your aerobics lesson!" Xavier sighed because of your stubbornness and the fact that you were always right. He had to teach a few Christmas aerobics classes (I don't know what I'm on about! ) so he kissed your red nose and got out of the cosy bed.

You closed your eyes and let out a wheezing breath before curling back into a ball and trying to get more sleep.

~

Xavier had left 3 hours before you had woken up again so you were all alone for a few more hours. You slowly slid out of bed and stumbled into the kitchen to make some chamomile tea and take some cold and flu pills. You weren't that hungry so you had some porridge and strawberries. You then decided to get dressed and go to the doctors after you almost coughed up a lung and vomited at the same time. Your chest ached every time you took a breath and there was a wall of mucus stuck in your throat that made you feel nauseous every time you swallowed.

You changed into a fluffy red sweater, a pair of soft cotton-lined leggings, black and white stripy fluffy socks and your favourite pair of ugg boots. You then threw on a large puffy black coat, a black beanie and some matching black gloves. You had previously booked your doctor's appointment so you just went straight out. You got into your car and quickly turned the engine and heating on before starting your short journey into town.

~

When you got there, you entered the doctor's office and signed in. You had to wait about 20 minutes before you were called in to see your usual doctor. "Ah, Y/n! What are you doing here again? Is it the weather?" You nodded as you sat down tiredly. "What's the biggest issue then?" he asked whilst putting a pair of latex gloves on, "It's my chest mostly. It's worse then last year-" You interrupted yourself by a string of mucus-filled, shallow coughs and a lot of chest pain afterwards. "It's sounds like it could be a chest infection so I'll just do a quick assessment and I'll prescribe you some antibiotics."

~

When you got home you were absolutely knackered (Brits get it:) and you felt even worse than before but when you saw that familiar blonde hair over the top of the couch, you instantly felt better. "I'm home," You murmured as you took your coat and shoes off. "Where'd you go?" Xavier asked after pressing a kiss to your warm forehead and laying your down next to him, with your head on his lap.

"I went to the doctors because I felt like absolute dog shit and turns out I have another chest infection. I can go back to my parents for Christmas if you want, I don't want you to get sick as well." He shook his head adamantly before looking into your eyes lovingly and saying, "I'm not just gonna leave you to suffer over Christmas. That would be an awful thing to do- I'm your boyfriend, Y/n. I have the duty of caring for you y'know?" You smiled and cuddled into his torso whilst you went to wrap your arms around his waist.

"Merry fuckin' Christmas." You said sarcastically. Xavier's loud laugh filled the room but your loud dog bark of a cough overlapped it, "I should probably go and take my meds." What a lovely way to spend Christmas eve, huh?

~

Sorry for the awful ending. I really can't write for shit! Anyway, I was trying to write using more British dialect because I hate being a Brit and having to write in an American accent. I hope you liked this and I'm sorry that there wasn't much Xavier x reader because I like to describe too much and then it ends up being like 10k words long.

Thanks,

Ava (The author :)

[tparker48]

Request for Rechtano2

"This better be worth the time to wake me up from my sleep johnny"

"I promise you liam, this is one of my greatest inventions yet" ushering him to the lab, he moved over as the machine rested on the table. "Behold! My greatest invention yet. The fantasy modifier. A machine that can put you into your very own fantasy"

"Into your very own fantasy huh? A vr headset can do that"

"Don't compare my invention with that knockoff! This is one of a kind"

"Whatever you say, how does it work?"

"Im glad you asked. Once an individual puts on this very headset..." Johnny said enthusiastically. "It scans the body and analyzes your deepest desire. Digitizing it into its program and allows you to visit it within its realm. And not just visit it, but BE in it" pressing a few buttons, the screen would light up as it displayed a module of the headset. A blinking light appearing just below it as it awaited for a host. "And since you woke up to help, its only fair if you be the first to try" he handed the headset over to him as he went to prepare the machine. Twisting a few wires here and there, and the screen above began to cycle in inputs.

"How exactly do I put this on"

"Simply put it on your head and let it do the trick. Like when you had to wear a beany when you had a bald spot"

"Im gonna ignore that for your sake" he said as he put it on. His eyes becoming masked as darkness filled the inside. But a screen inside would light up as it transmitted the area outside. A loading symbol signaling near the corner as he watched it blink. But it soon went away as Johnny walked towards him.

"Alright, now this will be just a tad blur for a moment. But it shouldn't last no more than a second. You ready?"

"As I'll ever be"

"Alright, initiating invention in three, two, one" he flipped the switch as the area inside the headset went dark. Liam's head felt a slight spark rush up his body as his mind drew a blank. His eyes seeing nothing but darkness as they moved around restlessly But a screen would soon show up as it had a loading bar. Its duration lasting a split second before the area around morphed his vision. Bringing him into a locker room as he was the size of 3 inches.

"Great, where'd the rest of me go? Johnny, you got some glitches in this stupid thing" he yelled within the locker room. Nothing but his echo replying back. "Hey! ya listening out there?"

"Nope, he can't hear you from out there" a voice echoed from behind. As voice sounding as if digitize as it startled Liam.

"Who's said that?"

"Why I did of course" As Liam turned around, he was met by a hologram. "Welcome to the hollow world, a place where all your fantasies become real"

"The hollow world? All i see is a locker"

"On the contrary my dear fellow, this is infact the hollow world. With each host, the device scans their greatest fantasies, and brings them to life by remodeling it in its digital design. With this one, I believe its a place that you desire most"

"Desire most huh? I don't think a locker is one of my fantasies. Heh, unless im tied to a bench at least" Liam said crossing his arms. But as he blinked, he noticed the area change as he found himself ontop of a metal bench. Strings of tape flew around its edges as each strip clung to his arms and legs. Pulling his body back first into the metal surface as the tape flattened themselves out. "The hell?!"

"Like I told you before, this world makes anything you think come to a reality" the AI assured once more. "Taped to a bench, an interesting fantasy. Didn't quite take you as the kinky type" the AI teased.

"N-no that's..I mean its not what I..gah! This device is rigged" Liam flustred.

"Nothing rigged about it. All this comes from that little noggin of yours. Why fight it when you can enjoy it. Speaking of enjoy, I see a little bulge going on in those pants of yours"

"H-hey! Keep your eyes off my crotch!"

"I wonder what's making it tick" the AI said as they loomed closer. Touching a hand on his forward as their eyes started to glow. As they searched through his mind, a picture would be brought to them them as they assessed it through its system "oh my, that's an interesting one"

"What? What's an interesting one" Liam blushed.

"Let's bring this one to life" the AI would snap his fingers as the realm would flash. Blinding Liam's vision for a split second as he placed an arm over his eyes. When he lowered it down, his eyes grew wide as he gazed up at a giant figure. A cock swaying high above as he recognized his face "Zac Efron?" He said as his heart dropped.

"In the flesh" Zac said in reply. Looming overhead as he gazed at Liam's form along the tape.

"What an interesting choice I must say. Isn't it grand to meet the one you truly look up to?"

"Yeah when he's not the size of building"

"Don't blame the system, it reads what's on your mind" the AI said with a smile. "Speaking of..hey Zac, the little one here is a fan of your work. Says he wants to meet you face to face one day"

"He does huh? Glad to see he's looking up to the best" he said as he flexed.

"Indeed. But there was something that he wanted to try. Something more valuable than a picture or an autograph"

"Oh? And what might that be?" zac asked in response. Gazing down at Liam.

"W-well its kinda complicated you see. I'd rather..not say"

"Liam here wants to be your butt cushion"

"Damn system.." Liam snickered.

"A butt cushion huh?" Zac asked down below. Gazing at Liam as he began to fluster more

"I...I...yes" he admitted with a sigh "i wanted to be your butt cushion ever since I can remember"

"Is that so? Well then, who am I to deny such a request. So you want to be sat on huh?.." Zac steadied his legs as he spread them apart just a little. Turning his backside towards Liam as he made sure the back of his legs touched the sides of the metal bench. Squatting down for just a second as his hands brought themselves around his toned glutes. Their fingers slowly moving themselves into his asscrack as it revealed the inner walls inside. His asshole puckered up in the center as it winked with anticipation. Stretching it til his fingers sunk into their muscle. He squatted down more as he bended his knees. "I can work with that. I've been looking to take seat".

Liam was was speechless as his face started to fluster more. Sweat nearly dripping along his body as he felt hot. He only watched as the ass above loomed more closer. Casting its eclipse overhead as the sphincter above winked towards. Almost as if it was a light wave as it descended to greet him. As the thighs landed on the platform, Zac's balls were the first make contact with him as they pinned their bulky form upon his legs. His taint soon lying on his torso soon after as the bubbled glutes rested on each side of him. Planting his rump fully onto the bench as his face wedged against the crater of his asshole. The hole winking just in front of his nose as he could just feel one of the meaty folds touch it.

"How's this my honorary cushion? Is this what you want?" Zac said in a soothed tone. Rocking his ass across the bench as the crater sea-sawed over Liam's face. Burying it even deeper between them as zac felt pressure near his hole.

"Its...wonderful" Liam said in cooed state. His vision dampened by the thick muscle, but didn't care as he focused on his position. He could feel every clench squeez around his head as the hole in front puckered against him. Its wink giving his face swift kisses as its earthy scent rubbed onto him. He would rub if he had the chance, but his hands would be occupied with Zac's glutes as he massaged into it. It was like playing with putty as he felt their warmth sink between his fingers. The sounds of zac's body groaning was like listening to gears turn as each push sent a slight gurgle from the inside. Its sound seeming to get even more closer as the hole spasmed in front of him. "Maybe I miss took this whole system thing" he said as he started to relax. But a sudden burst of air would draw him out of it as the hole above purched open. Letting out its foul breath like a dragon as the area underneath grew hot. "Dear god!" Liam coughed in response.

"Sorry little dude, that one must of slipped out" Zac said as he adjusted himself on the bench. A gas bubble slipping out just underneath his balls as he gave a swift shiver. "Ooo, kinda like that one"

"Alright, though this fantasy is good an all" he coughed "i think im over being your seat now"

"Aww what's wrong, the fun's just getting started"

"No, Im good" Liam muttered as he puffed out air from his nose. Pushing against the hole along its sides as he awaited for the tape to remove itself. But nothing happened "what the? Hey AI? Im thinking of being free under here. What gives?"

"Mmm I don't know. According to the system your not thinking of that"

"What do you mean im not thinking of it?! Let me up, let me u-mph!" As Liam struggled to get up, Zac's ass came close to him as he didn't have enough time to react. Before he knew it, his face was pinned down as the center of the hole compressed into him. Suckling at his face in the process as stretched over his ears.

"Seats don't talk back when they're sat on. But they make good mufflers" Zac said with a smirk on his face. Massaging his rear into the bench as he felt his Asshole stir ontop of him.

"Ooo, this is great reference for the records" the AI said before his eyes lit up. "Oh! Looks like the system's asking for analysis of the session. Have fun you two"

"Wait! You can't leave me under this situation! Heey!" Liam muffled between the hole's lips. Nothing but pink flesh filling his vision as the walls contracted. But he would only receive another blow of gas as his eyes started to water. His nose beginning to flare up as it tried to blow out the frowsty air. But the walls pushed the scent back in as the hole puckered in place, blowing another into him as the gas escape through the folds with a hiss.

"You go take care of that while the boys hang out" Zac said as he gazed between his legs. Lifting up his sac with his fingers as he looked at Liam's legs underneath. Doing their best to kick upward to try and force themselves free, but went nowhere as his taint mushed more into the bench. "Such a good little cushion you are. Perhaps you were born to be sat on like this.."letting his sac drop back down on them with thud. Picking it back up as he let go of them once more "or maybe, your just unsure how far your willing to go"

"Mphh!"

"Ahe, from all that muffling about down there I'd say you agree" Zac said as he grinned to himself. His massages against the bench turning into firm humps as Liam's struggles kicked up more. He was starting to get a hard as he slowly clasped around his hand, but the AI's voice would soon echo into the room.

"Sorry to be the end of the fun boys, but the creator wants to have an analysis check. Which means we're gonna have to cut the host's session short".

"Damn, and just when it was getting good. Ah well, I think I've had my fill of sitting down on this bench" he said squeezing the remaining gas out of his body "but I think I'll leave him something to remember me by" standing up, he held Liam's legs down on the bench as he lifted himself up partially. His hole carrying his face between his folds, but soon squeezed it out from its embrace as it ring puckered back up.

"I thought I was a gonner under their" Liam coughed. But suddenly looked up as Zac loomed above him. His hands still on his glutes as he showed Liam his hole one last time. "Uh!".

"You were a pretty good seat little dude. As a reward for your little efforts, a little something to remember me by.." With a wink, his face disappeared behind his shoulders as his ass dropped from its height. As it crashed down, liam saw the hole spreading towards him as his hands threw to air.

**thud**

"Gaah!" Liam jolted himself upward as he flailed his arms in the air. Hands grabbing onto him, but they felt normal sized.

"Relax Liam, relax! Your in the real world"

"J-johnny? is that you?"

"Of course it is, take off the headset" He replied. Liam not wasting a second as he threw it away. Johnny catching it just in time as he fumbled it in his hands. "H-hey, careful with that!"

"That was a nightmare, a total...gah I don't even know what to call it!"

"Easy man, take a deep breath"

"take a deep a breath? Im way ahead of that. Can still sense the scent of that...God that ass"

"You certainly sound like you went through a lot in there, but from the size of that bulge in your pants I'd say that's an understatement"

"I...I need to get some ass-air. Gch! I need to get air" Liam said flustered. Doing his best to cover up his erection that built up, but was barely able to hide it as he woddled out the door.

"Note to self, provide update with a level mode" Johnny mumbled as he carried the headset to his table. Liam still struggling to hide his erection even more as he walked down the hall. He wanted to shift his mind to something else. But wasn't able to as Zac's image constantly popped in his head. The puckered asshole stamping itself in his mind as it sparked his emotions through the day.

[mashmallow]

[8:22 am]

"y/n has more oversized sweaters at home than i have of my boyfriend."

"what's the point?," you'd asked.

"you're single." 

"or maybe you buy them to know what it feels like to borrow a guy's clothes," someone else quipped. all in the presence of your crush.

"t-they're just.. sweaters."

"come on y/n don't be shy." the sinister — in their defense, teasing — smiles, piercing knives into your back.

"what if she isn't?" everyone's head turned to junkyu who'd come to join the conversation. you wished you could slump further into your already relaxed seating position, legs stretched out, to disappear. 

"she's too shy to approach a guy."

 junkyu looked back at you, your eyes casted away and only looking at his legs. 

"it's a good thing i'm here then eh?" he stuck out his hand towards you, palm up, "do you want to come with?"

you looked up at him, "r-really?" junkyu smiled.

**

"thank you."

"no.. thank you.. for saying yes.. i just didn't want you to get uncomfortable from them."

"why are you thanking me?"

junkyu fiddled around, "i didn't think.. you'd actually come along.. where where'd  you want to go?"

slowly, a smile crept onto your face.

tagging : @softforqiankun @kpoprhia @enhacolor @rutowonz @yoshiikore @ravenori @illyzo @hyunsuks-beanie @deobienthusiast

[redhairedwolfwitch]

The Hidden Schnee - RWBY x Fem! Reader - Part 1 - Volume 3 - 4

A/n: testing out beta stuff for tumblr is confusing af... I'm also really enjoying writing RWBY x reader stuff, lowkey wanna do some where reader is Blake's sister too if anyone cares

Part 2

Three things you keep hidden from your friends.

Your last name, your sembalance and your Faunus trait.

All three were hereditary.

Your last name was your mother's, after her brother-in-law erased her from her family history for marrying a faunus.

Your sembalance was the same as your mother's, but you had your father's wolf ears.

You never had a team when you enrolled in Beacon Academy. You were put down as a solo team, but any team exercises had you working with both team RWBY and team JNPR.

Your secrets were hidden by just saying Y/n when your name was asked, not using your sembalance, ever, and never taking off your beanie unless you're completely alone.

You were aware you had cousins. Your aunt had sent a family photo of her family, but they stopped after one of your cousins turned ten years old.

It wasn't until after Beacon fell that you decided to visit your parents for the first time since you enrolled at the school.

"I'm sorry about your friends, Y/n." Your father's voice caught your attention as you tugged on the laces of your boot.

"I know, dad..." You replied, giving him a poor attempt at a smile as your wolf ears pressed against your head.

Standing up, your fingers ran over the grey beanie that you wore when you were at Beacon.

"Beacon fell... I think... it's time I stop hiding..."

"Are you going to stop hiding your sembalance?" Your mother stood in the doorway, Wynona Schnee frowned at you as you stared down at your beanie.

"Ruby will just see Weiss... I don't want to break her heart, like Aunt Willow broke yours after that rancid man she married tossed you from the family for marrying for who you love." Your voice morphed from sadness to a growl before your mother pressed your scroll into your hand.

"Your weapon broke in your fight defending Beacon. It is said that weapons are an extension of oneself, but you could argue, now that you are not hiding, you require a weapon that represents you as who you are now, not who you were when Beacon- your father has finished it, it's downstairs... what do you think about your new clothes too, darling?" Your mother enquired, smiling as you played with the sleeves.

///

"It's perfect." You stated, picking up your new weapon before you heard a knock at the door.

"Be safe... we love you, honey." Your father stated, his ears flopping down with worry before you hugged both your parents.

"I love you both."

///

"Hey, Y/n, ready to go?" Ruby smiled as you ran out of your house, skidding to a stop when you spotted the scarecrow.

"One minute!" You grinned, running over to it.

Ruby, Jaune, Ren and Nora watched in confusion as you shoved your grey beanie onto the scarecrow's head, leaving the two pieces of your broken weapon wedged into the arms.

"No more hiding..." You stated as you walked over, leaving the four of them to stare at the top of your head.

"YOU'RE A FAUNUS?"

///

"Also, JNRR is way cooler." Jaune retorted, making you roll your eyes.

"RNJRS sounds better than JNRRS." You interrupted Nora, leaving her to huff before you stopped to where Jaune had crouched behind a log.

"Where'd the S come from?"

"My last name." You replied, giving Ren a shrug as Nora blinked.

"Your last name starts with an S! A breakthrough-"

"Guys... it's here." Jaune announced as the ground shook, revealing Ruby firing at a Geist that had possessed a pile of boulders.

"I can't get a hit on the thing!" You exclaimed as Jaune went flying.

"Guys! I got it, we hit it, harder!" Jaune strategised, leaving you to raise an eyebrow.

Is that it?" Ren asked, leaving Jaune to pout.

///

"Another win for Team Junior! You know what, Ren, I think you're onto something with Ranger."

"Rangers. RNJRS." Ren replied, leaving Jaune to turn around with a frown.

"Where'd the S come from?"

"My last name." You deadpanned, rolling your eyes at Ruby and Jaune's faces.

"Your last name starts with an S... wait, I already knew that, your parents teach at Signal when they aren't out on their farm." Ruby realised, leaving you to playfully roll your eyes.

"C'mon, let's go back to the town."

///

"Food?"

"Check!"

"Water?"

"Check!"

"How about ammo?"

"Locked and loaded!"

You laughed at Jaune and Nora, ignoring how Ruby was staring at you.

"So... Y/n, you figured out a name for your new weapon?" Ruby prompted, leaving you to reach back to grab the bo staff.

"Resurgence... wait, who has the map?" You enquired, leaving Jaune to gawp at you.

"Please tell me you're joking."

///

Shion had been destroyed by bandits, the panic summoning enough Grimm that the village was nothing but smoke, rubble, and bodies.

"We should go, it's not safe here." Ren stated, turning to walk away.

Jaune and Ruby watched as you closed the eyes of the deceased huntsman.

"Ren's right... we'll find another way to Mistral." You replied, standing up with a blank look on your face.

///

The town after Shion luckily had an inn that the five of you could stay in. Jaune had mentioned there being less Grimm than expected, leaving you with a foul taste in your mouth as you sat on your bed, staring at your scroll.

"Hey Blake, Pyrrha, smile for the video!" Your voice caught Ruby's attention as her silver eyes drifted over the video you were watching.

"Y/n, you ought to be studying!" Weiss' voice had the on-camera you rolling your eyes whilst you just sniffled, flicking to another video before an image popped up.

A photo you'd taken with Pyrrha, without your beanie on.

"Pyrrha knew I was a faunus... she accidently walked in on me in the shower... I think Blake knew too, but everyone else just thought I loved wearing hats." You quietly explained as you noticed Ruby was watching, the sad look on her face noticeable because it mirrored yours.

///

"Are those buildings, damaged?" Nora asked as she stood on the remains of a fence.

"We should search for survivors!" Jaune shouted, the four of them running into the town as you grimaced.

"Jaune, the map! Ugh!"

"Hey, I think I found something!" Nora shouted, leaving you to run over to the others.

"Oniyuri? Well, uh, never heard of it." Nora replied, her hands on her hips as you just frowned at the sign.

"Me neither." Jaune admitted as Ruby glanced around.

"I have. You might think of it as, Anima's Mountain Glenn, had it never been completed. Years ago, the richest members of Mistral were unhappy with how the kindgom was being run. Frustrated with the council, they pooled their resources together to build their own city. With their own laws. They hoped that one day, it could maybe become it's own kingdom. Many thought it would be the future, I know my parents did." Ren explained, walking away from you and the group with a frown.

"W-what happened?" Ruby's voice crackled, leaving you to flinch as you got a glance at Ren's expression.

"What always happens." Ren replied, brushing away a layer of dust to reveal claw marks in the stone.

"The Grimm." Jaune concluded, leaving Ren to sigh as his fists clenched.

"Not just any one." Ren replied, leaving Ruby to frown.

"One?"

A flurry of birds overhead had you looking up as Jaune spoke, heading towards the other end of the village.

"Ever get that feeling in your gut, like something bad is-"

"SHUSH, don't jinx it!" Nora exclaimed, interrupting you.

///

The sky was clouding over as the five of you walked through Oniyuri. That was until Ren stopped you all.

It took moments for the five of you to grab your weapons, twirling Resurgence around your body as you slipped into a fighting stance.

Ren attacked the cackling madman first.

But it became obvious that he was after Ruby.

"Who I am matters not to you. Or you, well, you two do interest me... no, I only matter, to you." The man said, his gaze drifting from you and Jaune to Ruby.

"Me?" Ruby's voice squeaked, leaving you to raise an eyebrow as the man began to cackle again.

"You haven't the slightest clue, do you? Oh, how exciting this must be!"

"What do you want?" Ruby demanded, her hand on Crescent Rose as she glared.

The man gasped, "the rose has thorns! My little flower, I'm here to whisk you away with me."

Nora was infront of Ruby first, "but what if she doesn't want to go with you?"

"Well, I'll take her."

Jaune stepped infront of Ruby and Nora, leaving a gap that you slid into immediately.

"We're not going to let you do that." Jaune growled in response.

"Good." The man smirked, slipping behind Jaune as Ren called out to him, giving the man time to kick Ruby away.

The man began to laugh as Ruby hit Nora with lightning dust, your smirk going unnoticed as you placed a crystal of ice dust on the top of Resurgence.

"Well, if that isn't ironic!" The man cackled, not noticing or hearing the crackles of pink lightning surrounding Nora's body.

"Surprise!" The man cackled, throwing away his coat as he blocked Nora's attack.

"He's a Faunus!" Ren exclaimed, leaving you to frown, your wolf ears wilting onto the top of your head.

"A scorpion Faunus... watch out for his tail!" You exclaimed as the man went back to attacking, easily breaking out of the ice you cast at him.

The clanging of metal caught your attention as you recognised your parents' former colleague. Qrow Branwen.

"Hey..." Qrow whispered to his fallen niece.

////

"Look, pal, I don't know who you are, but you need to leave my niece alone." Qrow growled, holding Harbinger up in sword form.

"My name is Tyrian and I'm afraid that is not possible. My assignment from her grace was to retrieve this young girl, so... that is what I must do. One does not upset the queen."

"Queen?" Ruby frowned, holding herself up by using Crescent Rose.

"Salem." Qrow growled, not realising you'd heard but you were a Faunus.

"Who?" Ruby began, leaving Tyrian to huff.

"I think we've had enough talk, don't you?"

"You took the words right out-" Tyrian let out a screech as he attacked Qrow.

"Don't come closer!" Qrow growled, leaving Ruby to try find a high vantage point whilst you began to re-shuffle Resurgence.

"It's also a gun?" Jaune began, leaving you to shrug.

"It's mainly a bo staff, axe thing that can use dust but my dad added a rifle mode to be safe... they're moving too fast to get a shot in though."

///

Tyrian let out a yell as Ruby cut off his scorpion tail with Crescent Rose.

"You bitch!" He was about to attack again when you, Jaune, Ren and Nora moved into action.

You ignored how Qrow was getting an onslaught of questions, instea choosing to look at the piece of Tyrian's tail that was on the ground.

"Guys... pretty sure that graze is infected."

"Uncle Qrow, what's going on?" Ruby asked, her hand on his shoulder as Qrow gasped for breath.

"What's your favourite fairy tale?"

[join-the-joywrite]

Take my hand (take my whole life too)

"We played the Oprheum!"

The bouncing hug only lasted a second or two. While the boys regained a significant amount of lost strength, Julie's was slowly dwindling. She was, after all, only human and was out of home way later than usual. Her own internal clock seemed to be screaming at her to at least sit down.

Instead, she went down with the boys as her foot caught on a cable and she stumbled to the floor.

Alex made for a soft landing, one for which her apology was littered with giggles. Alex didn't mind. The slight pain was welcome in comparison to Caleb's jolts. Not to mention, he'd wanted to hug Julie ever since she cried during her not-so-private performance of her mother's song weeks ago. So he lay on the floor and squished Julie tight, only bringing forth more giggles.

"Hey, my turn!" Reggie yelled, rolling over and dropping himself half on Julie, fully on Alex.

"Oof," Luke commented, "that looks like it hurt."

"It did," Alex wheezed, adjusting himself to get used to the additional weight.

As one, all three of them held out an arm to Luke, who didn't hesitate to scoot closer and join the cuddle pile. Head on Alex's shoulder, he was right in front of Julie. He gave her a smile that, had she been standing, would've probably made her lose her balance. She gave him one back.

"I like this," Reggie murmured contentedly, closing his eyes.

"Yeah," Julie agreed, relishing in the fact that she could finally hug her boys, "me too."

They stayed like that for a moment before Alex sat up with great difficulty, sending them all tumbling. "You're all very heavy," he stated by way of explaining.

Julie chuckled and moved to stand up. Luke and Reggie grabbed one of her arms each.

"Stay," both whined. Reggie continued with a grin. "I promise I can be a soft pillow for you."

"I'd love to, honestly, but Carlos is waiting for me. He wanted to talk to me and. . ."

"Fine," Reggie huffed, "but just know that I'm feeling incredibly hurt right now."

Julie ruffled his hair, grinning when he closed his eyes and smiled under her touch. "There's always tomorrow."

Still, all three of them pouted when Julie stood up and righted her clothes.

"I'll see you guys in the morning," she said before walking to the doors. She paused just before closing it. "Thank you, guys."

Alex gave her a wave. Luke smiled at her with a dopey expression. Reggie continued to pout.

Julie bounded up the pathway, gait as giddy as her smile. Carlos was waiting for her in the living room.

"Hey," she said, joining him on the couch.

"Hey."

"Whatcha got there?" she asked, nodding to the paper Carlos' hands were clamped around. "Another French dip recipe?"

Carlos shook his head. "You know what this is."

"I . . . really don't."

"Your band! They're--!" Carlos stopped and glanced around looking for their father. He leaned across the vouch and whispered to Julie with wide eyes, "ghosts."

Julie forced a laugh. "What? No, don't be silly, there's no such thing as ghosts."

Carlos lifted his eyebrows. "Okay, then explain this."

Julie picked up the little black and blue page Carlos tossed to the middle of the couch, recognising it as a CD insert. For Sunset Curve. Julie's own eyebrows lifted slightly, but she continued to pretend like she hadn't a clue what was happening. Then she turned it over and knew the jig was up. Staring up at her was all four members of Sunset Curve. Trevor, or Bobby, sure looked different when he was younger.

"They're just lookalikes--"

"I'd believe you if they were here and we could touch them."

The idea of being able to hold and hug her bandmates brought a warm smile back to Julie's face. She quickly wiped it off and shook her head. "Where'd you even find this?"

"In the box with the French dip recipe."

"Ah."

Carlos suddenly looked around wildly. Julie looked around too.

"What? What happened? What are we looking for?"

"Are they here?"

"What? No, they're in the garage--"

"Aha!" Carlos grinned and folded his arms. "You're a terrible liar, Jules."

"Wh-- I am not!"

"You are, though."

Julie jumped slightly and moved away from Reggie. Carlos noticed and immediately turned his gaze where Julie looked. "Are they here now? Tell them I say hello!"

Julie rolled her eyes. "They can hear you, dork -- and it's just Reggie."

"Tell him that I say hello."

"Reggie says hello," Julie said, heaving a resigned sigh. "What are you doing here? I told you I'd see you in the morning."

"I knew it," Carlos whispered to himself as he watched his sister talk to thin air. She looked, in all honesty, a bit insane, but at least he knew he was right about the ghosts. "So how does the ghost thing even work? How come I can't see him now, but we can all see them when you play?"

Julie whipped her head from Reggie to Carlos. "It -- I'll explain it all tomorrow, okay? It's been a long day. Reggie, go back to the studio. Carlos, to bed. It's late."

"All right," Carlos grumbled, sliding off the couch. He paused at the stairs and glanced back to see Julie scolding nothing. He hoped he'd get to officially met the guys. Julie made them seem fun.

"All right, little man, what do you wanna hear?"

Julie repeated the question to Carlos, letting him know that it was Reggie who asked.

Carlos thought for a moment. "I like the song you were singing before you got back into the music program."

"Oh, that's not our song, that -- that--"

"No, it's okay," Luke said, "I'm sure we can work something out."

"I -- okay."

Carlos sat down on the couch, almost bouncing with excitement as Julie took a seat behind the piano. The melody she played wasn't loud and energetic like their usual songs. It was quiet and gentle. Even when the band kicked in, they were much softer than usual. Julie hummed along where the words should be so that Carlos could easily speak to the boys.

"I'm--"

"Wait!" Carlos said, jumping off the couch, cutting Luke off. "I'm gonna guess based on what Julie says about you."

"You talk about us?" Luke asked with a teasing grin.

Julie hit a particularly furious note. "Shut up."

"Luke, Reggie and Alex," Carlos said, pointing to the correct band member as he went.

"Nice, little man!"

"This is so cool," Carlos whispered, eyes widening when Reggie paused playing and knelt down for Carlos to stick his hand through Reggie's arm. "Woah."

The band noticed that they were very intangible to Carlos.

Luke was only slightly disappointed when Carlos chose to focus his attention on Alex next.

"I like your hoodie."

"Thanks," Alex said, beaming. "Here, you wanna try?"

"Nah, I don't play music . . . okay, maybe a little."

Julie laughed softly as she watched Alex stand and then point where Carlos should hit. To keep them from disappearing, she continued the piano. Luke kept up with his guitar, grinning at her all the while. Their little musical conversation didn't go unnoticed by Reggie and Alex, who shared a knowing glance before Carlos grabbed Alex's attention.

"Have you ever accidentally stabbed your drums through with the sticks?"

"No, and please do not do that. We have no idea what it costs to repair dead instruments."

Carlos handed the drumsticks back to Alex and hopped off the chair. He stood in front of Luke, who knelt down as Reggie had done.

"So. You're the one my sister has a crush on."

"Carlos!" Jullie yelled, standing up and slamming down about five wrong keys.

"It was nice meeting you," Carlos yelled as he fled the garage.

With her face burning, Julie chased him down.

Alex and Reggie did their best not to laugh. They really did. But the shell-shocked look on Luke's face was hilarious. Even the withering glare Luke sent them didn't help quieten their laughter.

Up in the house, Ray Molina thought he was about to witness a wrestling match. "Julie! What are you doing?"

Julie, who suddenly realised there was no way to explain why she was attacking Carlos without either sounding like a lunatic or exposing the phantoms to her father, slowly slid down to the ground.

Carlos sat up on the couch. "Julie has a crush on Luke! Julie has a crush on Luke! Julie has a--"

"Oh, that is it!"

Perplexed, Ray watched Julie spring back on the couch with a war cry, followed by a pained, "How could you say that in front of him?!"

"Who's Luke?"

Carlos, seemingly determined to ruin Julie's life, broke out from her seeking arms and grinned at Ray. "The beanie boy in her little boyband--"

"CARLOS!"

"Julie," Ray said, a playful warning edge creeping into his voice as he folded his arms, "is there something you want to talk about?"

"No! Not at all! Excuse me, I have to go, um, rehearse!"

"Rehearse?" Ray exchanged an amused grin with Carlos. "What for?"

"Uh, future gigs? You know, since we played the Orpheum, we might get like a ton of calls and -- oh, like this, see?" As Julie held up her phone, both Ray and Carlos saw Flynn's name, but both decided to give Julie a small reprieve. In the meantime, Carlos could fill Ray in about this little crush business.

"You are not going to believe what just happened," Julie said, taking the stairs two at a time. "I took Carlos down to the garage to meet the guys, you know, 'cause he figured them out and he wanted to meet them, but then he told Luke I have a crush on him and I ended up chasing Carlos back to the house 'cause I didn't want to stay in the garage with Luke -- and Alex and Reggie -- and then my dad caught us fighting on the couch and then Carlos told my dad that I have a crush on Luke and my life is over!"

Flynn took a moment to respond. "Well . . . it's not like he's wrong, is he?"

"Flynn!" The wail that Julie threw into her pillow as she face planted her bed was equal parts betrayed and mortified. "How am I supposed to show my face at practice now? Can I come and bury my head in the sand at your place?"

Flynn laughed over the phone. "Grow up, Jules. You turned Nick down for this air cutie. Nick. You made your choice, now live with it."

"Flynn," Julie growled.

"Okay, okay. Look, you have to talk about it at some point. There's no way you can have that kind of fire on stage without some mutual attraction, and that's just Luke and Reggie. Then there's Luke and you. Jules, that's not even a fire anymore. There is something serious between you two and even though I still think it's a bad idea because he's, you know, air, I still think you need to talk about it before the wrong thing blows up."

"I know," Julie sighed. "I can handle Luke -- I think. It's my dad I'm worried about. How do I explain it all without him wanting to take me to a shrink?"

"Don't tell him anything. Show him. Maybe with a little less flair than you did with me. Play him something soft. Like . . . wasn't your mom in a couple of bands when she was our age? Maybe he'd know one of her songs. Maybe if you guys played something of hers, he'll have enough of his head around him to know it's all real, but enough of it will be in the clouds that it'll be easy to explain."

Julie stared at her phone, at the contact photo she had of Flynn. "You are a genius."

"I know. So, I was just calling to ask how you're holding up, but I'm going to assume everything is fine and the guys didn't cross over?"

"Yeah, no, it was really weird. Caleb's curse just sort of . . . broke, I guess, after I hugged them."

"Wait, hold up. You hugged them? What was that like, arms hanging in the air and hoping you were touching?"

Julie sighed a happy sigh. "We have a lot to talk about."

"I'll be there for dinner, no excuses -- and I expect your dad to know what's going on by then."

Julie rolled over and muffled a groan of despair into her pillow.

"Rough day?"

"It's only ten," Julie whined, lifting her head to give Alex her sad eyes.

Alex smiled. "You'll be fine -- I mean with your dad thing. With Luke on the other hand. . ."

Julie faux sobbed into her pillow, eliciting a soft chuckle from Alex, who sat down on her bed. He reached out for her shoulder then quickly drew back. Ever since Julie left the garage last night, it had been on his mind -- on all their minds -- that the hug was a one-time thing. He didn't want to confirm their fears if they were right.

"Hey, it's okay, Jules."

Julie let out a strangled wail that took Alex a few seconds of clamping his mouth shut to avoid laughing at the poor girl.

"I'm serious. You know, Luke, he . . . he's not great with feelings. He talks with music, with songs, with lyrics. He says the most important things when he looks at you on stage or at a rehearsal or when you're writing music together. He's just scared. I mean, we all are, but him most."

Julie sat up, hugging her wail-pillow to her chest. "You sound like you're speaking from experience."

Alex shrugged. "All I'm saying is, give him a chance -- and give Carlos a break. Honestly, he might have just done you a favour."

"I cannot believe you're taking Carlos' side."

"I'm not! I'm not, I'm just -- things are already complicated. How much worse can they get?"

Julie sighed. "I don't know. . ."

"Well, it's not like Luke does either. He's locked himself in the bathroom and Reg and I think he's been crying in the bathtub this whole time. We'd phase through the door but Luke can actually hit us if he wants to so. . ."

"Oh, and you think I can't?" Julie teased.

The two shared an amused grin, but beneath it, both were thinking the same thing. What if she couldn't?

"All right, I'll tall to him. But you and Reggie have to leave."

Julie ventured into the empty garage. She looked around for Reggie and Alex, unsure if she was relieved or not when she didn't find them. Up in the loft, they watched Julie disappear as she headed further in towards the bathroom door.

She knocked gently. "Luke?"

Silence.

"Come on, I know you're in there. Alex says you've locked yourself in and won't come out."

"I'm not Luke."

"Okay, but I need to talk to Luke so can you pass on the message for me?"

"I'll let him know."

Julie smiled, finding Luke's behaviour somewhat amusing. She leaned against the door. "I'm sorry about Carlos, he . . . he just really enjoys embarrassing me in front of people. I guess he figured since you guys can't really speak to other people, you'll have to talk to me and we'll all have to confront whatever he said so that's why he picked you to tease and --" Julie broke off with a sigh.

The bathroom stayed silent.

"And I'm sorry for running out after him. I was just . . . I was afraid of what you'd say."

When Luke spoke again, though his voice was much softer, it was also much clearer. As if he were closer to the door. "Why? Was he . . . telling the truth? Did you say something?"

Julie fidgeted with the sleeves on her yellow jersey. "No, but I'm not exactly the most subtle person and if you haven't noticed, I suck at lying."

Luke laughed softly. "Oh, we noticed. Everyone knows you're a horrible liar."

"Thanks," Julie said with a grin, "I mean, I really just came here to affirm what a bad liar I am."

"Ooh, sarcastic too."

"Shut up."

"Well?" Luke said after a moment of silence. "Was he?"

Julie leaned against the door and sighed. "What does it matter? It's not like anything would come of it."

"It does matter, Jules. It -- it matters because -- well, I mean, you matter. To me."

"I know," Julie said softly, turning so that her back was against the door. "It sucks, doesn't it?"

"Not all of it sucks," Luke murmured from the other side of the door. "We could find a way. You've already done so much that no other lifer ever has, as far as anyone knows. Why stop there?"

Julie laughed. "Your ambition is very inspiring, Luke, but everything has a limit."

"So find that limit, then. You'll never know how high it is if you stop now."

Julie felt something brush her hand and glanced down to see Luke's arm phasing through the door. She wanted to reach for his hand but she was afraid she'd just pass through him. So she made a joke instead.

"You do realise that a floating arm is way more unsettling than anything else ghosts have ever done, right?"

"How's a floating head?" Luke asked, pulling his hand back and leaning forward. He gave Julie a grin. "That's always scary, right?"

"Stop it, that's weird."

Neither noticed that Julie had managed to make physical contact with Luke until after she'd shoved him back into the bathroom.

"If I come out there, are you going to poke me in the eyes again?"

"First of all, I didn't," Julie said, appreciating that Luke wasn't reacting with the panicked excitement she felt. "Second of all, I'll try not to."

"Okay, but if you do, I'm really going back into the bathtub."

Julie twisted her fingers and wrung her wrists and bounced nervously as she waited for Luke to step through the door.

"Can we try that again?" Luke asked, holding out both hands to her.

The scene felt vaguely familiar to Julie, and everything came crashing down when her hands passed through Luke's once and then twice.

"You're nervous," Luke said softly, "there's no need to be. You didn't think last time. You weren't nervous."

"I can't. I don't know what it is--"

"Yes, you do. You know it's not us doing anything. You're the one with all the magic, Jules."

Nervous but now confident, Julie tried once again. She thought she'd be able to walk on water whe she felt Luke's hands close around her own. The smile he gave her was the usual dopey look she always noticed him wearing around her.

"See? It's all you."

Julie squeezed his hands, almost like she was afraid she wouldn't be able to hold on much longer. "I like this," she murmured.

"Hey, Jules?"

"Yeah?"

Luke watched her eyes widen the tiniest bit as she gave him a questioning look. "Uh, do you -- about what Carlos said . . . We will talk about that, right?"

"Yes. I promise. Just . . . later?"

"Okay." Just the promise was enough for Luke. Besides, he could hold her, now. He could hold her hand, brush her hair out of her face, hug her. He could even flick her nose or tug her curls to annoy her, nudge her around when she didn't laugh at his jokes. And if -- he hoped she did -- but if she didn't feel the same way he did, then being able to be her best friend and just high five her now and then would still be enough. She wasn't just out of reach anymore.

Ayeeeee this just be sitting in my notes??? I found it like this??? All it needed was a title??? Speaking of, I might change that title and steal it for a sad fic oop

[bumblesimagines]

Bad Girls Are Better

Request: Yes or No

Listened to Ashnikko while writing this

(Y/N) pulled up her fishnets, admiring herself in the mirror.

"The baddest bitch has arrived." (Y/N) whispered, sliding on some shorts and grabbing her black lipstick, applying it. She picked her backpack and headed out of her room, grabbing an apple and following her driver out of the fancy apartment. (Y/N) got into the limo, checking her phone.

"Excited?"

"It's fucking Riverdale. A murder happened, so what? It's still a boring ass town." (Y/N) huffed.

"Maybe you'll make some friends. Miss Veronica Lodge is attending Riverdale High." Her driver reminded. (Y/N) scoffed.

"As if I wanna be friends with that stuck up bitch." (Y/N) crossed her arms, looking out the window. She took a bite out of her apple, chewing on it. (Y/N) nodded to the driver, getting out of the car and slamming the door behind her. People were already staring. (Y/N) glared at them.

"What? Got something to say?" She sneered. They quickly turned away.

"Pussies.." She mumbled, taking another bite out of her apple as she headed up to the school. She entered the hallway, holding her head high as she moved like a black mamba waiting for a dumb rodent to come into view. Just like that, a blonde appeared in her line of sight.

"Hi, I'm Betty Cooper, you must be new!" She smiled brightly. (Y/N) stopped, looking at her from head to toe. Pink, soft, baby face, typical soft girl. (Y/N) responded by taking a large bite of her apple, a loud crunching sound making Betty blink.

"Where's the bathroom?" (Y/N) asked. Betty pointed towards it. (Y/N) brushed past her, heading inside and tossing the apple into the trashcan. She went up to the sink, taking out her lipstick and reapplying it.

"Welcome to Riverdale by the way. Where'd you come from?" Betty asked.

"Hell." (Y/N) replied, pressing her lips together before facing her.

"Riverdale sounds so boring, even with those murders. Let's face it, people die everyday from something different." (Y/N) crossed her arms.

"Who's the queen bee?"

"Um-"

"That would be me, get out of the way Nancy Drew." A redhead said, leaving a stall.

"Cheryl Blossom aka Cheryl Bombshell. Digging the edgy style by the way." Cheryl grinned.

"The River Vixens could use a girl like you on the team. We need something new and spicy not cold and wet like Veronica. Anyways, ciao!" Cheryl blew her a kiss before leaving the bathroom.

"Ciao!" (Y/N) mocked her in a high pitched voice before rolling her eyes.

"I need someone to go clubbing with." (Y/N) said, placing a hand on her hip.

"I know just the person." Betty smiled. She led her to a lounging area where some teens were sitting on a couch.

"Guys, this is (Y/N), she's new." Betty introduced them to her.

"Archie Andrews." The ginger smiled, offering his hand. (Y/N) blew a bubble and looked at the girl.

"Veronica Lodge." The photos did her no justice.

"Jughead Jones." Edgelord.

"You four are the perfect team." (Y/N) grinned.

"For?" Veronica questioned.

"Clubbing."

"Oh, absolutely not-"

"You just need a little cleaning up and you'll be fine Judgehead." (Y/N) said.

"Christ, Veronica is the only one with a fashion sense." (Y/N) mumbled. Betty looked like she was gonna go to Sunday school, Jughead looked like an emo kid, and Archie looked like an awkward dad. (Y/N) went over to Betty, letting her hair down.

"Mess it up." She instructed. Betty ruffled her hair up as (Y/N) looked for clothes. She found some and dragged Betty into the bathroom. Betty changed into the dark green plaid shirt and black skirt. (Y/N) tucked in the shirt and unbutton some of the top buttons, making it seem off-shoulder. Betty changed from her soft pink flats to black ones.

"Moving on to the next idiot!" (Y/N) left the bathroom with her.

"Oh my god, Betty, you look hot!" Veronica squealed.

"Yeah, Betty.. You look amazing." Archie said. (Y/N) rolled her eyes, snatching Jughead's beanie off his head.

"Ruffle it up." Jughead shook his head so his hair was messy. (Y/N) ran her hands through his hair a bit before putting the beanie on him a bit loosely so his hair was more visible than before. She tossed a leather jacket at him before clipping some chains onto his belt.

"There you go, Edgelord." She looked at Archie. (Y/N) gave him a jean jacket and some ripped jeans along with black shoes. After he changed, she put a chain necklace on him.

"Now, we're ready to go." (Y/N) said, taking them out of her room and leading them to the front door.

"Where are your parents?" Betty asked.

"Overseas." (Y/N) replied.

"They have a business trip already in England then they'll be back for a day or two before heading over to Italy." (Y/N) said, texting away on her phone. She left the apartment, heading to the awaiting limo. They got in, attention still focused on (Y/N).

"What do your parents do?" Veronica asked.

"They own (L/N) Industries." (Y/N) said, shrugging lightly. (L/N) Industries was a big company that worked with oil and electricity.

"Damn.." Jughead mumbled.

"What club are we doing to?" Veronica asked.

"Starlight Moon." (Y/N) replied, looking at them.

"Friend owns the place." She said as the limo came to a stop. People were waiting in a long line to get in. (Y/N) got out, walking right up to the bouncer.

"Miss (L/N)." The bouncer greeted. (Y/N) flashed a smile.

"They're with me." She nodded to the group of teens before entering. A popular hip-hop song was playing, lights were flashing, the smell of alcohol and marijuana was thick in the air.

"Totally not my type of scene." Jughead said. (Y/N) rolled her eyes, leading them to some stairs. She went up them, heading into the VIP area. (Y/N) turned and looked at them.

"Come on, enjoy yourselves!" She said, grabbing some drinks and giving them to the teens. Veronica drinked instantly, Archie hesitating.

"The hangover will be killer but at least you'll have fun!" (Y/N) said, laughing.

"Even if you can't dance, just let the music guide you!" She added. Veronica looked at her friends.

"You guys heard her, come on!" Veronica giggled. Archie sighed, drinking his cup and letting Veronica drag him away to dance. Betty swallowed thickly. (Y/N) took some pills from a girl and walked back over to them, popping a pill into her mouth.

"You want some?" She asked. Betty picked one up.

"What is it?" She asked.

"Molly." (Y/N) replied, giggling. Betty frowned and shook her head. (Y/N) shrugged.

"Your loss." She said, giving one to Jughead and stepping away. Betty looked at the pill.

"Betty, it's not worth it." Jughead said, taking a sip of his drink and cringing. Betty looked at Veronica and Archie as they danced and laughed.

"It's just a pill, Jug. How much damage could it do?" Betty asked.

"You could become addicted-"

"I won't. It's just one time... We can take it together if you want." Betty said. Jughead sighed but nodded. They took the pill.

"Now we play the waiting game until it has an effect." Jughead whispered, going over to a couch and sitting down. Betty looked over at (Y/N). She seemed pretty normal, dancing and laughing. Betty drank a little before joining her. They danced, drank, and laughed for what seemed like an hour. Betty laughed, feeling a rush of happiness and relaxation. Even Jughead had joined them, jumping around and dancing with Betty. It was probably the most fun the teens had. (Y/N) collapsed onto the couch, moving so Betty could sit as well. Betty felt her phone vibrate and picked it up.

"Elizabeth Cooper, where in God's name are you?! It's three in the morning! I can hear music-"

"Mom, mom! I'm fine! I promise... I love you so much, you know that, right?" Betty asked, giggling.

"Are you drunk?!"

"I love you, I'll be home soon." Betty said before hanging up.

"We should head home." (Y/N) chuckled, standing up and getting everyone. They stumbled out of the club and to the limo where the driver opened the door for them. They all got in and collapsed onto the seats.

"George! Take these bitches home!" (Y/N) called.

"What are their addresses?" George asked. They told him their addresses and George drove them there. Archie and Betty were first with Jughead going with Archie. Betty entered her house and looked at her parents. Alice and Hal watched her, arms crossed. Polly gave her a pity filled smile. Archie and Jughead went inside, going up the stairs and falling onto the bed. Fred peeked in but decided against scolding them since they were already fast asleep. They drove to Veronica's place before heading home.

"Told you that you'd make friends."

"Suck my dick, George."

[soldier-on76]

"Dad, where'd Papa go?" A little boy with dark curls asked, holding a gray beanie from the table.

(( Send me Anons as my muse's child(ren) ))

✷ - Jack flinches at the sound of the small voice, snapped from his thoughts. How long has he been sitting here, hunched over that damn beanie?

Blinking the moister from his eyes, the old soldier turns in his seat, reaching down to pick up his son. "Come here, buddy."

With the child now seated on his lap, he brushes his nose against the tip of the soft curls, trying to keep it together. It's too soon. Talking about Gabriel hurts, sometimes more than he can bear...but not as much as leaving his kid to wonder where his other father is. Jack only wishes he had more time to prepare for this awful talk.

"Something happened to Gab...your...your papa."