id love to hear your thoughts abt jealous ran <3
nonnie, you’re gonne regret asking me this ohymdosnsn
jealous ran is deadly. he’s awfully sweet and charming, more than usual. his sickly sweet smile is only reserved for you. god forbid the person who is making him feel like this is around, it’s over for them.
he’s irritated, to say the least. his body tenses at the way sanzu smiles and jokes around with you. he knows you two are childhood friends, and ran trusts you with all of his heart. he’s pretty confident in himself as well. he likes to think he’s a pretty handsome guy with a good personality, but when he watches the say you smile with sanzu, he starts to doubt himself a bit. in an irrational manner, ran walks over to you two, an arm looping around your shoulders.
“whatcha guys laughin’ about?” his smile is wide— too wide, sanzu notices. you look uo at ran and smile at him, brightly exclaiming what you were discussing with “haru.” even the nickname makes him sick, but ran is soon hit with a wave of embarrassment. what the hell is he doing? why is he comparing himself to sanzu? he doesn’t give a fuck about sanzu (he makes sure sanzu eats his meals, sometimes even poorly tries to prepare him meals after long nights of drinking)
so why the hell was ran haitani, one of the most handsome guys from ronponggi, comparing himself to sanzu. it’s almost as if you can read his mind because you’re quick to compliment how good he looks today. he gives you a soft smile and a kiss on the cheek. sanzu quietly excuses himself, going to rindou to make conversation. ran takes this opportunity to pull you away from the party into a private corridor. his hand is firmly grasped onto yours as he pins you against the wall.
instantly his lips lock onto yours, hands groaping random parts of your body. he wants to stabilize himself, remind himself that you are his. when his hand brushes against the jewel on your ring, ran is hit with another way of embarrassment. that’s right, you picked him. despite all odds and struggles you two went through as kids, you picked ran haitani. he pulls away from you, staring at you dumbfounded.
“when did our hello kiss turn into a hello make out?” you smile up at him, fixing a few strands of hair that had gone astray. “you feel better?” you ask him in a hushed voice, lips leaning closer to his.
“yeah. i love you,” whenever ran speaks to you, he never thinks. his tongue simply rolls out words and phrases. he feels free from the constraints of everyday life, of his past mistakes. he can just be himself.
“i love you too, ran.” and ran knows you love him. whne he’s jealous like this, the only thing that consumes him is self-pity and self-hatred. but you’re able to pull him out of that dark hole by reminding him you chose him for a reason.
you aren’t with him for his money, his looks, his connections. you’re with him because you love him— you love the boy who would bring you flowers every time you went on a date. you loved the boy who took your backpack from you, slinging it over his own shoulders so you could freely move around. you love the boy who draped his tenjaku coat over your legs whenever you sat down and wore a skirt so you could sit however you deemed comfortable.
you loved ran haitani for his heart. and he too loved you.
sorry i got carried away.
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man i can’t get over dazai and higuchi never really knowing each other because imagine the potential dynamic between her and this guy who has Everything she’s ever wanted for herself. he lived her dream of escaping the mafia but even while he was still there his subordinates respected him instead of questioning his authority. he’s the center of akutagawa’s attention, something that she’s never had. mori wants dazai back and sends bodyguards to protect him but tells higuchi she’s unsuitable for the job and sends hitmen to kill her. dazai’s the first character she speaks to in the series and so much of her life has been impacted by his actions echoing through akutagawa and she’s not even aware of it RARGHHHH
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the thing is, akutagawa meeting dazai in that forest is possibly the worst thing that's ever happened to him, but akutagawa himself sees it as the best thing that's ever happened to him, and the juxtaposition between that never fails to make me insane
Idk if 'best' is the most accurate term but he does see it as a life-changing moment, and "giving him a reason to live" at the very least has a positive connotation. And yet this ended up causing him so much more misery and pain than he was already in to begin with. Basically it didn't cause his problems but it did amplify them. But he doesn't see it that way and it makes me wanna 🕳🏃♀️
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