#when theres a lot of lore behind this

[dreamflayer]

Just a girl and her Wyvern <3

[ilonacho]

i miss having time for fandom😔

[skitskatdacat63]

I just saw a tiktok that was like "can somebody explain to me the 'absolute batshit' formula one lore there must be to incite 21k fanfictions of the sport" uhhhhhhhhhh yeah lemme pull out my powerpoint with 1k+ slides

[xxswagcorexx]

!!!!

Fallen angel Ash + Red??????? do tell :D

OKAYYYY i've already Established red and ash in the last ask so. let's talk abt their dynamic as fallen angels shall we? ^_^ (ramble under the cut)

so the dichotomy between then is that red accidentally became a fallen angel while ash intentionally fell from heaven. although both of them have themes of free will, the way free will plays into their fall from grace is vastly different. red used free will and had a consequence that was Much Harsher than ash, who knew exactly what is gonna happen when he fell (and he wasn't really a big fan of angelhood anyways)

also on top of that, red mourning his angelhood while ash just. simply cant understand is sooo. yeah. red and religious trauma. (he has so much of that oh my god) . and also red not understanding ash's willingness to rebel intentionally. insert thing about their ideologies being Directly opposed here bc ash thinks red isn't living his best life for being so willing to submit himself to a higher power. Yeah

but the thing is. even though they're fallen angels for vastly different reasons, they're still the closest thing they have to understanding each other. because whether they like it or not, they're still in the same place. after everything. so an arc where they reluctantly accept each other and talk about fallen angel stuff would go so hard i think. (also add them working out their feelings together and *chefs kiss* i loveeee that trope sm)

and maybe. once they work things out and realize they only have each other, they can have hope that things will be better. because they have each other. they might not understand the other all of the time, but from what they understand, they can forge something between the others. and maybe from that, they can realize they can survive this new and cruel world they find themselves in (also yes this is another paradise lost parallel. guess what story sparked my idea for this /silly)

(^ also that one is inspired by the ending of paradise lost where micheal [non fallen angel] talks to adam and tells him to story of jesus and how there won't be a battle against satan and how jesus [adam's future son] will be hurt and killed instead. but even as adam hears that, he still has hope things will be better. even if everything is horrible rn. he still has hope because he was made in gods image. and its a wonderful parallel to an earlier scene where satan is sitting in the garden of eden and crying at all of the grace and beauty of it and yet he doesn't feel better because he's so full of hatred and spite. that has nothing to do with the hc its just one of the coolest things in paradise lost i think . )

anyways yeah they make me. very jksdnsdjkgnsgnsdgmns. ty for the ask anon i appreciate it! <3

[shoezuki]

hi hello so for any people curious bout the dream beef i am talking about im gon chronicle it all here in a hopefully fully contextual way for both longterm weirdos and new people who dont know bout my parasocial beef w dream. ill try to keep my biases out of it somewhat but anyways,

this began with a podcast Tommyinnit and Jack Manifold have together in which they had philza as a guest. Episode 9 is currently behind a paywall on their patreon but they have a youtube channel where they post them publically as well. Not sure if they make all their episodes public eventually or not but i digress.

Twitter user _constel_ has posted 5 clips from the podcast in question that contain their discussion about dream. I have downloaded the videos but tumblr doesnt want me to put them in this post so i will try and sum up each clip as I go.

Clip 1: Phil starts talking about how once the dsmp was done people would joke about how their 'contracts' would be over and they would be allowed to talk about things behind the scenes. philza mentions the infamous philza tweet in response to dream.

for context, the main discussion is around this exchange from around february 2021, where dream 'jokingly' argues that he is responsible to tommy's high viewership on youtube:

Most of it the tweets are deleted by both parties but it was very much a whole thing. Phil has apparently joked about revealing the context of his reply 'when he retires' (mentioned clip 1).

Jack Manifold had apparently been in a call with tommyinnit when the exchange was happening and recalls tommy being extremely stressed. The context philza gives is that he was texted by tommy to look at the thread while he was going on a walk and tommy was panicking over if dream was genuine (mentioned clip 2). Philza says "I'll find out if he's fucking joking' and that he essentially vibe checked dream. Tommy also states that after the twitter exchange he legitimately wrote in his diary to never be rude to dream: "never be horrible to dream. It's not worth it. It makes me too sad". Additionally jack manifold establishes that he hated dream from the beginning, they hate each other, and that, although he acknowledges dream aided him through the dream smp, he hates how dream 'takes ownership of other people and their accomplishments because he was a guiding hand' (mentioned clip 3).

Jack manifold mentions that tommy was 16 during this exchange and philza additionally says it was out of line (Clip 4). Philza more openly talks about there being 'reds flag after red flags' with dream in clip 5.

OKAY thats honestly a vague description and theres a LOT more so watch the clips if u want. Heres another tweet 'summarizing' it as well. But anyways this of course had people talking about dream again, some people (accidentally?) acting like this is about dream smp lore, and a lot of people concerned about how tommy was afraid to upset dream and would blame himself when dream picked fights with him.

Dream's response on dreamwastaken was to tweet about how he appreciated everyone who was on the server dispite differences, as well as a zip file to download the dsmp server/world file.

Worth noting there is a limitation on how many people can download the file within 24 hours so now people are only getting an error message when trying to access it which is fucking funny. On his private he also tweeted "love and appreciate you guys <3 very happy to be uploading again :) hope to keep it rolling" (Im not cropping out the reply its funny)

Thats all hes said so far, I havent seen tommy or jack manifold talking about it either. technically it isnt outright in response to their podcast but obviously everyone is taking it as such.

final stuff/my thoughts: dream has obviously had a tendency to kinda 'take credit' for 'making' the streamers who were on the dsmp and its notable that in his tweet he still acts like his server was the reason for people's fame and relationships. Saying 'a group of creators most of which would never have collaborated under any other circumstance got together and made something really cool' is just his thinly veiled way of still taking credit for tommy's fame and the relationships he and others have made and its moronic. Not to mention dsmp was very much NOT the server that got these specific people together, i mean techno and phil met through minecraft mondays, tommy and jack manifold met both of them through smp earth i believe. Even if the dsmp wasnt a thing they probably would have collaborated with other members through mcc eventually. the idea that the dsmp was what brought them together and a bunch of minecraft clowns would 'never have collaborated under any other circumstance' is stupid.

anyways sorry this is long as shit. im going to pray dream doesnt let this go for at least 3 to 5 business days as per usual

[mochamadeleines]

Sweethearts and Sweet Dreams <3

“Nothin’?”

“Mhm.”

“Whats behind your back then?”

You sway in place, trying to suppress a knowing smile. “I dont have anything behind my back.” (6.4k words)

tags!! - 18+ modern au! Husband! Joel Miller, Wife! Reader, you guys are happy and in love!, mutual obsession if u squint, lots of exposition im so freaking sorry, pervert Joel if u squint, praise kink joel if you squint, dumbification if you squint, written for those with daddy issues lowkeeyyyyy, written with game joel in mind but could be hbo joel no problem!, lowk i combined the two in my mind, mentions of shy old man joel, housewife! reader (by choice), unspecified age gap but reader is like. thirty? and joels Like...55??, talk about joel taking medication for his anxiety, p in v sex, dirty talk, public sex, outdoor sex, joel has a kink for dresses because i said so? service top joel if you squint, pet names, a pinch of jealousy and possessiveness for fun, playful banter, mentions of maria and tommy and their baby with a made up name Lol, mentions of ellie and sarah (rip), mentions of readers past abusive relationships, talk about joel struggling with substance abuse/addiction and being hospitalized.....Im sure u can theorize why </3, lots of lore ill get into in another fic MAYBE *smirks*, flip flop in perspective, sometimes showing what joel is thinking or what reader is thinking blah blah

authors notes!! - hi there!!! im mocha and this is my first joel fic ever + my first fic posted to tumblr!! im really nervous cuz i havent written anything in months and ive never written joel before so please let me know if you like it!! id love to write more of this au for u guys if theres a demand for it...Thank u for reading!! also barely proof read im ngl. ive been staring at this fic all day im sick of itttt. p.s i dont usually write smut i also kinda do idfk Is this bad or am i tweaking

You step out of the house, morning sun soaking into the roots of your hair and the driveway beneath your feet. Theres a package youve been waiting for. 

You cant contain your grin as you wiggle it out of the hot prison that is your mailbox.

“What the hell are you doin’ out there barefoot?” Joel chastises you from the front door, leaning his elbow on the frame. Joel, your lovely husband of two years. Been together for five. And because of how hard he works, you have the privilege of being a stay at home wife. Some people think that sort of life is stifling, but youve never felt so free. No more jobs you hate, no more financial struggles. Just you, Joel, and your cat, Cement. He likes to pretend it isnt a totally hilarious name for a pet.

You were his first relationship in almost a decade, so it was a lot of work helping him unpack his anxieties about dating, and a lot of work for you to feel safe and unafraid. Honestly? Youve been mistreated by enough men to land you in the psychward.

But Joel never yells at you, he never breaks things when hes angry or threatens to hurt you. He might raise his voice every now and again, but its never because of something you did. Sometimes the stress of life is just too much. 

He works hard, he loves his daughter- daughters- and he would do anything to keep you happy. Whatever you say goes, he says. Even now, you hardly argue. Of course you have disagreements, or off days thatd lead to one of you being especially moody, but the both of you do your best to communicate.

Behind that rough exterior, is someone who just wants to be needed. 

You first met Joel at a youth center you volunteered at, he taught guitar, you taught arts and crafts. Joel says it was your smile and sense of humor that charmed him. It was his singing and southern accent for you.

Your favorite thing about Joel is how soft he gets around you. He says its because you make it easy to be soft. 

Joel was a shy lover at first. He would get nervous just kissing you, or holding your hand. While most people become intimate very early on in their relationship, you and Joel didnt do anything sexual for the first five months of you dated. Sure, you almost did, plenty of times, but he would get so overwhelmed and cut things short. You broke two of your vibrators during this era of your relationship. Embarassing.

You remember your first time very vividly. Joel had worked back to back doubles trying to meet a deadline, and on the final day, after having barely spoken to you for almost a week, you had shown up to his house, unannounced. You were wringing water out of your jacket when he swung the door open. 

“How-” Joel blinks a few times, stepping forward to examine the rainfall. “How long you been out here?”

“Not that long,” You lie and pick up the container you brought off the porch chair. Part of you had a hard time mustering up the courage to even knock on the door. Droplets of water cascade down your chin. “Hi, sorry. I know youre tired.”

He shakes his head, voice soft and warm. “S’fine. Now c’mon, youre gonna get sick.”

Youre seated at the little dining table next to the kitchen now, trying to let the sound of the rainfall ease your nerves.

Joel was quick to grab you a towel, and does the honors of drying your face and hair with it. “Why didnt you jus’ call me? Woulda gotten out of the shower faster if i knew you were gettin’ soaked out there like this.”

“I dunno, sorry.”

“An’ whatd i tell you about apologizin’ all the time?”

“Sor- Uh. Right. Okay.” You tighten your jaw. No more.

Joel moves behind you, now squeezing water out the ends of your hair. “Whas’ that?”

“Oh!-” You peel back the lid, showing it to him. “Old fashion cake donuts are your favorite right? I remember you saying you liked eating them with your coffee in the mornings so…I made these. Youve been working a lot lately and I wanted to do something nice for you.”

Joel gingerly grasps the container from your hands, looking into it. Theyre a warm golden brown, outside evenly fried, and the sweet scent of them hits his nose right away.

“I was just gonna leave them on the doorstep and call you to tell you they were there, but I wanted to see you.”

His adam's apple bobs as he swallows the dryness in his throat. Youre too good for him. 

“Thank you very much.” He presses a kiss to your damp hair. “Now, lets get you into some dry clothes.”

Joel gives you a t-shirt and a pair of his boxers to keep you modest while your clothes wash and dry. 

You wait patiently on his bed for the hot chocolate he promised you before you showered. Theres nothing to watch on the tv, so you just turn it off and reach for the lamp on his nightstand instead. 

He comes in quietly, and sets the mug down beside the lamp. You finally come into focus, clear as day even under the low lighting.

“You uh.. You look nice.”

You blink. “I look nice?”

“In my shirt.”

That gets a smile out of you. 

Joel tips his head towards the mug. “S’hot so, give it a few minutes. Dont want you burnin’ your mouth.”

You nod. “Okay.”

Hes sat beside you now and the two of you sit in silence for a while. Its not awkward, just the kind of silence where both of you want to say something but just.. Cant.

Joel unravels first. “Missed you, y’know. Just been tired.”

“I know.” Your voice wobbles, and Joels jaw tightens like hearing you sound so sad stings him. “I missed you, too.” 

He slides his hand over yours, giving it a squeeze. Its okay. 

“Hey Joel...Can I stay the night?” 

“Sure. Id really like that.”

While you drink your hot chocolate, you and Joel catch up. You both talk about work, and about your new found interest in baking. Joel teases you about your lack of cooking skills, you do the same. Youre both useless. 

When its time to climb into bed, neither of you can actually fall asleep. Joel rolls onto his side, away from you and the window. You follow, curling up like a little cat against his back. The sensation is nice for the both of you.

You speak up after a little while.

“Joel?”

“Mm.”

“Thank you for letting me stay.”

He scoffs, voice thick with exhaustion. “Like I'd force you to leave after you brought me such a nice present.”

You let out a little giggle, “So if i didnt, youd kick me out?”

“Id think ‘bout it.”

You gasp, gently shoving at his back. “Thats mean…!”

“S’really not.”

“Oh yeah? And what if I poisoned them?.”

“Then itd jus' be a regular day of your cookin’ then.” Joel reminds you, lighthearted. Too many times where you left the shells in your eggs or burnt toast or left the bacon on the pan for too long.

“You cant get mad at me for my dark past when you made a perfectly good sirloin taste like horse leather.”

“Ugh. Dont remind me. That was like putting a one-hundred dollar bill into a paper shredder. How do either of us stay alive again?”

“Uh. Digiorno?”

“Digiorno.”

After a few moments, Joels rolling over again, and hes guiding your head to settle against his chest. Your arms wrap around him, and his arms around you. 

“Joel,” You whisper. He hums. “Im cold.”

“S’cause youre not wearin’ any pants.”

“And whos fault is that?”

“Still yours.”

“I was left out in the rain like a sad, sopping wet cat. One that was left in a box all alone with no family…” You pretend to sniffle. “Dont you feel bad for me?”

Joel sighs, not saying anything more except making sure the part of the comforter behind your back is tucked into your side so the cold air doesnt get in. When hes done, you do a little shimmy up his body, and throw your leg over his hip. Oh no.

Hes alert now. Very alert. Be normal. Joel hesitates, licking the dryness off his lips. “Uh. Feel better?”

“Mhm.” You push your face into his throat, cat-like, before settling down again. Hes like a radiator.

Actually scratch that, he cant be normal. 

“Darlin’.” He rasps, patting your back to get your attention.

“Mm?”

“Your leg. Move it.”

A few beats pass. “Why?”

“Because…” Wow,  he didnt think hed get this far. You shift forward and Joel lets out a quiet exhale through his nose, one that couldve been masked by the rain if you werent so close.

“Are you-”

“No! No. Its- Its not what you think-” He cant see your face in the darkness but he knows you feel the semi-hard struggling through the confines of his pants. Lame.

“Joel,” You say, soft. Your hands slide up his arm to cradle his jaw. Lightning flashes into the room, giving you a glimpse of Joels tight expression. He whispers your name back, just as soft.

“This is normal.” 

Its normal, it is! Except for the fact that you guys havent had sex yet. The stress of being intimate is too much, kills his boner in a blink. The longer he waits the worse the anxiety gets.

“I-I know.”

You place a hand on his chest, feeling it pound away like crazy through all the soft muscle.  

“Youve been taking your medication, right?”

Has he?

The silence of him thinking is proof enough. “Joel-”

He sighs, rubbing his eyes through the darkness .“I know, I know. Shoot, Im sorry. I just forget sometimes.”

“Its okay.” The pad of your thumb strokes the tops of his cheek, and you press a tender kiss to his mouth to soothe him.  “...Want me to remind you?”

The softness of your lips has him a bit dazed. “Huh?”

“I said, do you want me to remind you? I can- You know, call you before you leave work. Make sure you take them.”

“You know I wake up at five-o-clock in the mornin’ , right?”

“I know.” 

In a whisper, “Okay.”

Joels rough palms trail down your back and stop at the curve of your butt, finger tips delicately tracing the skin above your shorts. You shiver.

Barely above a whisper. “We dont have to go all the way.”

He says your name again, laced with worry. He doesnt want you to feel pressured. 

You pull your leg off his hip and push yourself up, settling your hands on either side of Joels head.

“Can I tell you something?”

“Yes-”

“-And you cant get all in your head about it. You stay here, with me. You stay present.”

“Okay, okay.” He nods, a bit defeated. “I will stay present.”

“When you...When you say you dont wanna have sex, what is it that youre thinking exactly? I know you said you just get really nervous but I feel like youre not being totally honest.”

Joel stays quiet, idly rubbing your sides. Maybe you are a cat. Just getting to feel any part of you is soothing. “I jus’ want you to feel good. ‘Fraid ill do somethin’ you dont like.”

“You cant assume how I feel, Joel. Being intimate.. It takes time to learn what the other person likes.”

He sighs. “I know.” Youre always right.

Adding on, “Like I said, we dont have to go all the way,” You lean further back, situating yourself on his hips. He lets out a shaky breath when he feels the pressure of your ass through his sweats.

“But, I want to start somewhere. I want to feel you.” 

“Fuck- Um-” Hes shaking now, letting you grind your hips down onto him. Joel cant seem to control the way his hips instinctively push up to meet yours. Youre both becoming of a mess of little gasps and hot breaths and tiny whimpers already.

You hunch forward, guiding his hand under your your shirt- His shirt- letting him feel up the supple skin of your stomach, then the area where your ribs are, then your-

“And I want you to feel me,”

Surprisingly, you did actually go all the way that night.

Your sex life was a bit of a rocky start, but after Joel got over most of his anxiety, you learned quickly just how goddamn insatiable he was. Five years in and he still regularly makes you sore. 

There are a couple things you learned about him and his sexual interests. He loves to take you in his truck, in your kitchen, in your bathroom, on your couch. Other, riskier places. Anywhere that isnt your bed apparently, not that he isnt fucking you there either.

Joel is handsy, so handsy infact it embarasses you to no end, especially when youre infront of others. Thats usually how it starts, too. First he kisses you, then gropes your hips and your ass, and the next thing you know, youre cumming on his fingers. Then hed bend you over, or get you on your back, or make you ride him. Is it really riding if hes just slamming up into you until your brain turns into mush?

He likes that too. Making you not think.

Youd be lying if you said its only ever him. Sleepy morning handjobs before work, whining to him over the phone and touching yourself to his voice, arching your back into him while you're washing dishes, sucking him off after hours in his office.

And while most men prefer lingerie or little costumes, Joel likes dresses. Dresses that are discreet so he can take you in the backyard when he comes home early and sees you gardening. Or when youre both at a friends house and hes had a little too much to drink and finds himself alone with you. Dresses that make it easy to play his favorite game with you. I touch you, and you make sure we dont get caught by being too loud. Joel really is the worst sometimes.

Now, you only ever wear pants when its cold, or to bed or sometimes when youre lounging, like today. Youre in some shorts and a tank top. Otherwise, its dresses all year round, usually retro styles or ones meant for spring. Joels not picky though, he loves any dress on you.

Even if you wear an extremely modest, white lacey sleep dress, looking like some kind of vintage ghost, the man would still keep you up all night. And he has. He said you looked like a princess. You guess you kind of did.

The entire thing is like an unspoken arrangement between you both. He doesnt tell you to wear them, you just do.

And he works hard to spoil you, so why not buy as many cute dresses as possible? 

You got a cute dress today too, on the same day Joel has off. You think its going to be a new favorite of his.

The big polymailer stays hidden behind your back. Be casual. “Uh- Nothing!”

“Nothin’?”

“Mhm.”

“Whats behind your back then?”

You sway in place, trying to suppress a knowing smile. “I dont have anything behind my back.”

“Lemme see then. Show me your hands-”

“Hey, Mrs. Miller!”

Both you and Joel turn your heads to the voice, and only one of you has the energy to fake a a smile. Your neighbor is stopping in his driveway, having come back from a jog it looks.

“Hi, Lee.” 

Joel really, really, really doesnt like Lee. You dont like him either, but youre not one to cause problems. Lee on the other hand, is. Hes a bit younger than you, and a lot younger than Joel. Hes one of those tech dudes with a massive ego, thinks that youll be swayed by his money and his “charm” and youth as if youre some sad housewife in need of saving. Gross. 

And another thing, Lee doesnt even actually live here! Hes here ever so often to visit his dad between, you dont know, tech expos? You forget. Joel believes he started showing up more often to see you. 

Youre walking towards the porch again. Joels looking especially unhappy to see him today, knuckles pulled taut into a fist. His lips stay pressed into a thin line, careful not to let anything slip out. He usually lets you do most of the talking, as much as it pains him. 

Joels really not a fan of the way Lees eyes take a trip up your bare legs. Little shit.

“Out with no shoes again, Mrs. Miller?”

“You know me, Im uh- Im weird.”

“The weird ones do it best.” He smiles, all teeth. It gives you the creeps. His attention is on Joel now. Its like watching a puppy try to one up a wolf. “Right, Joel?”

“Uh huh.” Whatever that means.

“Actually, I've been meaning to ask you something, Mrs. Miller.” Lee crosses into your driveway and you glance briefly at Joel, as if to make sure he isnt going to start growling at the other to stay away. Youre clutching the package to your chest now. 

“Have you ever been to a support group for uh- you know, the spouses of addicts?  I have a friend from work and shes really struggling.” 

Lees tone is sugary sweet, but the fake kind you put in diet soda except that stuff is way better. Joel sighs from the door. You stand there, dumbfounded on the porch steps because what the fuck is he going on about. 

You clear your throat, keeping your voice firm. “No. Ive never needed to.”  

Joels voice cuts in like a knife. “Been clean for almost twenty years now.”

“Yeah but, you know,” He shrugs, squinting a bit under the morning sun. “Relapses happen.”

Joel and Lee are at a stand still, and the moment Joel lets the arm leaning on the frame drop to his side, you know youre in for a lot of trouble. You move quickly towards the door. “We have to get ready for a- uh- a thing? but Im sorry about your friend.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Miller. Im doing my best to support her.” And before he turns away, he just has to be slimy to you. “If you need someone to talk to, Im here for you.”

“No, that really wont be necess-”

Joels slinging a strong arm around you to yank you back inside before shutting the door. 

“Motherfucker,” He hisses to himself, stomping through the walkway and into the kitchen.

“How-” You rub your eyes, letting them adjust to the light inside of the house. You put the package down onto the bar counter that opens up the kitchen and follow Joel to the fridge. “How does he know?? I thought-”

“Been living in this house for decades now,” His expression is tight, brows knitted together while he chugs a bottle of water. “People talk. ‘Specially if I'm being rolled into an ambulance on more than one occasion.” Joel frowns. “Fuck- I shoulda punched him in the fuckin’ face- Do you see how hard he tries so hard to flirt with you infront’a me?”

“I know, love. I was there.” You take the bottle from his hand and set it to the side, then wrap your arms around him. “Try not to let it get to you okay?”

Joel sighs into your hair, giving your body a squeeze. “I know, I know, but jus’ hearin’ him tryin’ta use my baggage to make a pass at you…S’fuckin’ evil.”

“I agree, but I dont want his blood on the driveway.”

“So get it on his driveway instead, got it.”

You giggle and tip your head up to kiss him. The tension eases from Joels shoulders, and he cups your cheeks, letting his worries melt away into your mouth. When the pads of his fingers start to slide under your tank top, youre leaning back. Youll be here for a while if this goes any further.

Joel mindlessly chases your lips, looking a bit pouty now that its over.

“Im gonna start getting ready for the barbecue, okay?”

“This early?”

“I like being punctual.” 

“My brother wont give a damn if were late.” He noses your jaw, pressing a kiss here and there. Your knees are beginning to feel weak. The bastard is trying to distract you.

“But I do. The farmers market opened today, and I promised Maria I'd get her fresh strawberries before we got there, remember?”

“Alright, alright.” He grumbles into your shoulder.

Joel lets you go, watching you round the bar counter to get your package and disappear upstairs.

-

Ever since you came down to a freshly showered Joel, and got into the car with the gift bags you prepared for Maria and Tommy, Hes been staring at you. One wrong move and the drools gonna start pouring out of his mouth.

Your hair is in its relatively natural state, freshly washed and shiny from the oil you put in it. You put on some light makeup, and went a bit heavy handed on the blush to look sunkissed, and topped it off with a flavored lip gloss Joel especially enjoys. 

Now, the dress. Its a pink floral mid-length dress, with a low cut sweetheart neckline and a corset style backing to cinch your waist and push out your chest. The material is thick and pretty, and there are two other layers under the skirt to keep its shape. You have on a pair of little pink pumps with little bows to match. 

The drive to the farmers market is fairly peaceful, the windows are half down and theres music playing at low volume on the radio. You and Joel have different tastes in music, but one genre you can always agree on is alternative rock. 

The weathers beautiful, sun high in the sky, and its not too hot or humid. The day really is perfect. Youre gonna soak up some sun when youre at the barbecue. Hopefully, they made lemonade again too.

Joel has been mostly quiet throughout your shopping. While it would worry some, youve been with him long enough to know that he just has a lot on his mind. What hes thinking about? Maybe youll learn when you make it back home at the end of the day.

You gasp, strolling through the grass to a stand with a mountain of apples. Granny smith, Macintosh, Pink Ladys, Honeycrisp, the works. He grunts, trying to keep the things that are already in your basket steady. You came for strawberries and are going to leave with much more than that.

Joel nudges you softly. “Remember, this is quality stuff, meaning itll go bad faster. Dont get too much.”

“Okay, got it.” You beam, and then begin inspecting the Pink Lady apples first, trying to find the ones with the best color.  He keeps the basket within reach so you can drop your picks in.

"These were Sarahs favorites."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah, it was funny 'cause we started arguin' over these or Red Delicious. I think Red Delicious is better."

"Thats so cute! Hmm. Should we get one for her? A Pink Lady?"

"Uh," He thinks on it for a moment, unsure, but the smile on your face helps him make a decision. "Sure, why not."

You drop two perfect Pink Ladys into the basket, moving onto the next pile.

“Hey, Joel.” You grin, holding out a wrinkled granny smith apple. “This one looks like you”

“Ha ha.” He deadpans, and grabs it from you to put back. In turn, hes reaching for the runt of the pile. A pathetically small one sitting near the bottom. “Now this one looks like you.”

“Does not!”

“Does too.” 

The next stand has golden kiwis, and youre practically dragging Joel forward to try them. You ask for one, and the man at the stand slices it into halves, giving you a plastic spoon to go with. 

You let Joel smell it first. “S’good.”

“Lets see if it tastes good.”

You sink your spoon into it, humming when you see how soft and easy it is to scoop out. In your mouth it goes!

Its tastes sweet, a bit mango-y and fucking delicious. You bounce in place, spoon feeding Joel next. “Oh yeah,” He smiles, smacking his lips a bit to really let the taste settle on his tongue. “Were takin’ some of these.”

You take one, then two, then three and four then five and as you reach for the sixth one, Joels stopping you with a gentle hand. 

“Darlin’.” 

“Right.” 

For the next few stands its just you and Joel trying various kinds of fruit. Starfruit, blueberries, some mangos, and then youre going back to the truck.

“I think my favorites were the mangos and golden kiwis. I hope Maria and Tommy have enough space in their fridge for all of this.”

“They moved into a bigger house, I reckon their fridge s’probably bigger, too.”

“What time is it?” 

You let go of Joels arm so he can switch the basket from one hand to the other. 

“‘Bout…” Hes squinting at his watch. “12:34 in the afternoon.”

“Oh! Guess we got the shopping done sooner than I expected. Hmm. Should we stop somewhere in the mean time?-" You snap your finger when you remember something. "They opened up this cafe that has cats in it! We can drink coffee and play with them for bit! The next fourty-five minutes will go by super fast."

“Youre gonna make Cement jealous.”

You bat your hand dismissively. “Hes not gonna caaare.” 

“Oh yes he will. And remind me again why we named our cat Cement?

“Uh, we were both drunk and had gotten him the day before without a name picked out?”

“A whole year later and we still kept it. Worst pet owners ever.” Joel chuckles, opening the passenger door for you like he always does. 

“Thank you.”

“Mhm.”

The giant basket of fruit goes into the back seat next to the gift bags before Joel slots himself into the drivers seat. 

You fumble with the radio a bit, trying to see what else is on but ultimately landing back on your preferred station. Theyve been playing a lot of Linkin Park recently. Hell yeah. Joel buckles himself in at last, and pulls out of the parking lot. 

“Marias gonna teach me how to make baked chicken,” You hum, gazing outside the window.

“You sure youre not jus’ unteachable?”

“Ha ha,” You lightly shove his shoulder, making him smile. “I thought you loved the meat sauce pasta I learned how to make.”

He settles into his seat more comfortably at the stop light, elbow rested on the window. “Got me with that one. Think I like ground turkey over beef, though.”

“Yeah? Me too. The beef tastes better but the turkey is lighter. Stops me from feeling all sick.”

“Agreed.”

Youre looking out the windshield now. Where did all the buildings go? Youre out of the city. 

“Uh, Joel?”

“Mm?”

“Where are we going?”

“Somewhere to kill time.”

“Yeah but where?”

“Youll see.” 

Your brows pinch together. “I see a whole lot of nothing except for trees."

“Almost there.”

Joel makes a hasty left turn onto some campgrounds. Your stomach starts to twist into excited knots. Is he gonna show you a baby deer or something? Bunnies? He used to be a park ranger for this area, and would tell you stories about all sorts of baby animals hed run into.

The car comes to a stop, and he turns the engine off. Silence.

“So…Were out in the woods to kill time?”

“Mhm.” Joel unbuckles his seat belt and twists into the back to grab the spare jacket he usually keeps there, then gets out of the truck and comes around the back to open the door for you. 

He holds your hand to help you get down from the passenger side, and as soon as both of your shoes hit the ground Joel is on you. 

You dont know where your hands should go, youve kissed Joel a thousand times and yet you still get so flustered when he catches you by surprise. You keep your hands on his shoulders for now, letting him press wet kisses to your neck and shoulder.

“This is new right? The dress?” He gives your ass an appreciative squeeze through the fabric. “Thought you looked so pretty when you came down stairs in it.” 

Your heads spinning. Something about your dress? 

“Woulda been okay if you let me have you earlier.” He pulls away, examining your flushed face cradled by his hand. Every part of you just fits so well in his palms. “Then I thought, why not have you now? We got time to spare.”

“Joel- We- Someone could see us-” You sputter, and Joels already shaking his head with a knowing smirk. He pulls you around to the bed of the truck, popping it open, only pausing to spread open the jacket he grabbed, just having just thrown it in there when he came around to get you.

“No ones gonna come lookin’ for us.” He turns you around, pushing you down onto your front. “As long as youre quiet.” 

Fuck. You really hate this game. At least, you like to tell yourself that.

Blood rushes to your ears while Joels rough palms lift up the skirt of your dress, exposing your ass and thighs to the cool air. He whistles from behind you. 

“Red lace panties?” His fingers dont shy away from tracing along the fabric covering your cunt. “This new too?”

You crane your neck over your shoulder to look at his face. “Uh.. Surprise?”

Joels smiling now, fingers dipping under the lace. “Thas' awfully sweet of you.”

His touch slips and slides around your growing wetness, then trails down to your clit. Your voice wobbles a bit and fuck- fuck hes going too fast. “Joel- Ah-” You whimper and try to push yourself up to look at him but his hand is steady on your spine, keeping you down. 

Smug, “Go on, sweetheart. Keep sayin’ my name. Jus’ like that.”

A whine escapes you when he pulls away, “Nooo.” You push your ass back, as if to entice him. You succeed, because hes skipped his usual routine of fucking you with his hands and is now unbuckling his belt.

Joel rolls you onto your back, and peels your underwear all the way off, bunching it up and shoving it into his back pocket. Your face burns just watching him.

“Think i'll hold onto these for a lil’ while.”

His hands push the back of your knees towards your chest, exposing your heat. Youll never get used to the way he just seems so interested just watching your cunt squeeze around nothing. 

“Thats-” You swallow, pushing yourself up onto your elbows. "Joel.”

“Relax." He coos, "Seen it a thousand times already, and ill be seein' it a thousand more. Get used to it, honey.”

Your attention flickers down to where his dick is about to meet your entrance. Joels nudging you down onto your back again and pulling the top of your dress down to expose your chest. Its when youre distracted that he actually moves to push himself in.

Both of you groan together, and Joel could never get bored of fucking you, not when your cunt just pulses around him everytime hes inside you.

Joel wastes no time fucking you once he eases all the way inside. Youre trying your best to keep quiet. Shit is no easy task. Its like Joel is trying to get you guys arrested.

He props himself up with a hand near your head, and lets the other keep one of your legs pinned open. The moans start to claw out of your throat. “Joel- Joel-” 

“Shh. Thas’ enough.” He growls through his teeth, fucking you harder. “Youre gonna- Gh- Get us caught-”

Something rustles between the trees, making you both freeze. You clasp your hands over your mouth, watching Joel straighten up to look around.

After a few seconds of squinting, Joel can see a few foxes moving about through the trees. Thank fuck. His shoulders visibly relax.

Hushed, “E-Everything okay?”

“Yeah, jus’ some animals.” 

And like that, hes back to it. His dick is going to make your eyes permanently stay rolled into your head. 

Joel is always just so handsome when hes pounding into you. His forehead gets shiny with sweat, and his jaw is tight from clenching his teeth, keeping himself quiet so he can focus on your moans. His face is noticeably redder against his usual farmers tan too. Really, hes just so attractive.

A flurry of yes and harder and fuck spills out of your mouth and into your palms. Not too loud, you try to remind yourself.

“Joel- S’too much-”

“Nah, thas’ not it.” He huffs, humorous. “You can take it. Y'always do. In fact, you love gettin’ your cunt bullied by me, aint that right?” As if to get his point across, he thrust in all the way to the hilt, making you keen. You forgot how to breathe, lungs drawing tight in your chest.

"Fuck," You manage to squeeze out.

Your palms push weakly at his shoulders, trying to ground yourself somehow. His head drops to the junction of your neck and shoulder, inhaling deeply.

“You good?” He checks in, breath hot on your skin. As if your crying isnt enough.

“So g-good, Joel- Fuck- Youre so good.” 

With a little nod, Joels pushing himself up, switching to slow and deep strokes, really digging himself into you, and trying to find that spot he likes to call home.

He massages your chest, then squeezes your sides and your hips and finally, his thumb finds your clit. Immediately, you jolt. 

“Oh fuck-” 

“Quiet.” And he says it to keep the charade going, even though his favorite thing is hearing your sobs.

His thumb rubbing incessantly against your that sweet little nub of yours. You choke, and Joels chuckling, watching the way you squirm, body not knowing whether it should lean into his touch because its too good or away because its too much.

It starts with this firey feeling under the pad of his thumb, then deep inside your stuffed cunt. Youre going to cum. 

Your hands fly to your mouth again, and you get all wide eyed from the sensation. Its cute. Your muscles pull taut, legs locking around Joels hips. Youre wailing into your palm when it happens.

“Good girl,” His voice soothes you through it. “Very good.”

He pets away the fly aways sticking to your sweaty face when its over. Your eyes drop shut while you catch your breath. 

Joels moving again now. He rolls his hips a few times, and thumb is building the foundation of another orgasm in you. Youre shaking badly.

Your words slur too, “Cant- Too soon- Joel- Joel-”

“Another one.” Joel says firmly, but breathless. 

Youre gasping, not sure where to focus your eyes. The trees around you look like theyre spinning. Your attention is back on Joel, whos looking rather satisfied watching you squirm and cry. If thats how wants to play, then fine.

Your hands slide up Joels biceps, and rests on the nap of his neck to bring him down. “Juh-Joel,” You pant, cradling his face with both hands. “Youre so good- The best-”

Oh, Joel likes that one, you can tell by the way he looks away briefly. Shyness. Excitement runs up your spine. Joel loves being told hes doing well. 

“You are- Nghh-” You swallow the drool in your mouth, trying to get the words out clearly. “The best husband I could ever ask for.”

Joel wheezes, head dropping into the curve of your shoulder. “Please.”

“S’true,” You nod rapidly, fingers curling into his hair. “Youre so good to me and-and youre mine and- Joel-  Im yours.”

“Jesus-” He groans, soaking up the feeling of you pressing kisses to his face and up his jaw. 

“Hhah-  No one else can have me, okay? No one- Not even-”

The name doesnt even come out of your mouth before Joels coming to a stop to slip his arms all the way around your middle. With the new leverage he has on your body, hes drilling his way into you. You fucking squeal, rules now long forgotten. Youre a useless ragdoll in his arms and he wouldnt have it any other way.

Your lips are shiny with spit and left over lip gloss, and he can still taste the mintiness in his tongue. Every now and again your eyes drop shut, but his dick just punches into your guts a little harder. Look at me. 

Your brain is mush, just the way he likes it, and youre perfectly pliant in his arms, babbling over how good you feel. Hes kisses along the valley of your breasts now, stopping to suck the flesh of your nipples.

Youre just so pretty. Even when you have bedhead, or youre snotty from a cold, or youre all dirty from working in the garden  youre still so pretty. Including now, all sweaty with you lipgloss all smudged and your mascara starting to run. Youre perfect. 

Joel grunts loud, jaw clenched tight as he gets lost in the feeling of your insides. His perfect little wife.

When he cums, hes doubling over with a loud grunt, getting a few last thrusts in before his spent floods your cunt.

Youre blinking away your tears, now watching the clouds inch along the sky. It really is a beautiful day. You pet Joels sweaty hair, and kiss the side of his temple. Your core throbs faintly. Jesus, he did a number on you.

“Love,” You say softly, patting his back.

“Mm?”

“Get up.” Another pat. “Youre squishing me.” 

Joel backs off to buckle himself up, but you stay seated to catch your breath and adjust your dress. At least it didnt get ripped during all the… Commotion. Not like last time.

“I need my underwear back.”

“Nope,”

“Joel.”

He kisses the center of your forehead and helps you down from the bed and into the passenger seat instead.  “Told you i'm keepin’ ‘em.”

You sputter, “I cant go to barbecue commando!”

“Sure you can.” He pops open the glove compartment and gets out some tissues, hand snaking under your dress again to clean you. You sigh softly at the sensation.

“Youre the worst.”

“I am indeed the worst.” Joel pulls the seatbelt over your chest and clicks it in. “You can tell me all about it on the way to Tommys.” 

[sillyassboy]

i should post here more ive grown too accustomed to twitter's character limit

anyway something that's been on my mind about bugbo recently is the way ive tried to kinda shift the perception of the series one way a bit too hard. when i saw even the slightest chance of people seeing bugbo as a horror series or an ARG with deep lore or whatever , i wanted to put it out there multiple times that this wasn't my intention at all and that bugbo was mostly just a stupid fun series in the style of old 2000s flash animations.

anyway im kinda worried now that people are using this to dismiss Any possible meaning behind the series. i love seeing people's interpretations, and there Are genuine things I want to convey through the characters. theres still no meta deep lore, that's for sure, but there a few characters, most notably bugbo and gerbo, who i have very specific ideas for in my head of what kind of people they are. if there's anything in the series to analyse, it's the characters.

I am kind of a dumbass sometimes so a lot of things in the series might contradict each other, but I really want to make sure at least the characters remain consistent. the worldbuilding is absolute nonsense, yes, and a lot of what happens in the series is comedic and stupid and played for laughs, but i really hope I can give everyone a concrete idea on what the characters are like. so far I think it's been relatively successful but im also worried that my constant re-iterating of bugbo just being Stupid Fun may have fucked with that a little bit. there is very much a certain way I want you all to see bugbo and gerbo, who I consider the two main characters.

and while im rambling about bugbo I wanna say here, don't get used to the tone of a familiar foe. as proud as i am of what we did for that episode, i consider it the tonal limit for the series right now. future episodes will be more in line with the feel of episode 1-2, and they will Definitely be shorter for the most part

ok bugbo ramble over

[awsugar]

speaking of questions that exercise very mcr specific muscles in your brain. i was perusing mychem tumblr the other day and came across a masterpost about the SS/mayo blog frerard lore (i’m aware frerard is not PC these days thanks obama). i’ve been a dedicated fan for over a decade now and my brain is an mcr lore bank but i had literally never heard of this. do you know about it and if you do what are your thoughts

omg yea. ss/mayo is crazy. and unfortunately a lot of it has been lost to time and its not even saved on wayback. theres some stuff thats convincing, theres some stuff thats not.

so like lets preface this by saying that the ft willz myspace? confirmed to be frank. and obviously the stuff posted on skeleton crew, those screenshots of ft willz works that look like theyre on burnt paper? yea so those are confirmed and those are real fully frank no questions.

i personally am a skeptic of other accounts that claim to be ft willz. like the tumblr? i do not think thats frank. and i think that came at a time when people had already really speculated or figured out that ft willz WAS frank. so like i think the tumblr is honestly just someone who was pretending to be frank and managed to sort of emulate his style but yea i don't think it's him. i think the reason some of the stuff hits so hard in a frerard sense is because that was intentional by the person writing it. you know.

anyway ss and mayo. there were two blogs on blogspot started in 2007 i believe that fans thought were frank and gerard. well it started with mayo (its-mayonaise.blogspot.com). that blog is still up and so are a lot of the posts but i think a lot of them have been deleted as well, and not saved anywhere on wayback. im sure theyre on someones hard drive out there but i haven't seen them. then a blog appeared called iamthemodernprometheus.blogspot.com. some of those posts are still up but most are gone. that was ss/sss/shitsubou shita/frank (allegedly). ss started interacting in the comments on mayo's blog. and i think i may have read some mayo blog posts back in the day but i haven't been able to find them to answer this one. i just remember when i joined the fandom most people thought it was gerard.

now here's a couple things of evidence. THIS is a blogspot comment thread where people who have saved some of ss' blog posts put them in the comments. and yes obviously it could be an elaborate hoax by two fans who were invested in frerard. but like these things were being posted as it HAPPENED. you know? idk i wasnt there in 2007. but 2007 was when the fanfic took off and we really informed a lot of our perception of what happened with frerard on things like ft willz/stuff that happened on stage/and a lot of these posts really fit into the timeline. i would recommend reading that because its kind of hard to believe its like. a teenager pretending to be frank. it really just SOUNDS like frank. and he's really writing blog posts. basically to gerard lol. it gives the impression that they were on tour together (projekt rev) and doing the Thing but like there was def tension going on behind the scenes and we already know that thats true. frank didn't like eliza and thought gerard was moving too fast, the imnotokay.net post came from someone in mcr's camp that ppl thought was frank (or maybe brian) and then tbh its happening again?? just months later? it makes complete sense that if frank thought gerard was moving too fast with eliza that he DEFINITELY thought he was moving too fast with lynz getting MARRIED to her backstage just a couple months? after breaking off his engagement with eliza. anyway just read the comments. its very easy to believe its frank.

and then the other peice of evidece i found in this reddit thread: x comment in particular by u/ReallyKapu. they say that they have always gone by Kapunua online and that they met frank at a lm show, gave him a hat with the inscription 'sss' inside and later on he thanked them for it on the blog.

sure enough:

from what i've read it seems like the blog was actually a community. there were people who followed it and made friends in the comment section. and it does seem implausible but it looks to me like frank saved all of his gifts from tour and then made this post specifically thanking people for them. the person who claims this is them also says that they don't think mayo is actually gerard but that frank thought it was.

and i've seen stuff saying that if it wasn't gerard it was probably someone close to the band because they had like information that was posted on the blog that wouldn't come readily available (or make sense) until the show the next day.

anyway, i wasn't there for this. i was on the forums and twitter and tumblr for a LOT of mcr history but this was a little before my time and i think if i had been there OR if the blogs had actually been preserved in some way that i might be able to form a better opinion. i think theres a lot of evidence for frank, not sure about gerard. but i won't claim that it's true either bc we really don't know and this one i don't think we ever will!

[eyeball-jam]

people are taking interest in corruption au! gerard keay so im gonna give a basic rundown of the lore because i like it and think its fun :3 [THIS IS HIGHLIGHTING HOW HE BECOMES AN ENTITY !! THERES A LOT MORE LORE BEYOND THIS]

in this au gerry gets diagnosed with brain /and/ lung cancer before he starts having seizures, but this doesn’t change much about the fact that it’s too late for him. because of his consistent association with the beholding, while he isn’t marked, the power of it has seeped into his being just enough to grant him the sight to know his inevitable demise. with that knowledge, he makes a really irrational decision to basically run away, to get the hard part of leaving done and over with.

he was married to michael, but was terrified of forcing her to watch him die a slow, painful death, and so he left her. told her abruptly that he wanted a divorce and left without any explanation because he believed if she were angry at his sudden betrayal she was more likely to move on. he left behind all his material possessions, his work that was hardly his in the first place.

his doctors believed that there was a very slight chance that they could save him and so he went through with radiation therapy but he knew it wouldn’t do anything. he just let it happen. and it was during this time that that radiation used to treat him began to grow a conscious mind, feeding off his loneliness and fear and suffering. when he finally died it took the opportunity to fuse with his body and bring him back.

when he is revived the beginning of their mutualistic parasitic relationship begins and he is more of a zombie than a person. he spends months and months of time trying to get his body back to the way it was before and to recover from the damage done by the tumors. during this time he has to come to terms with the fact that this parasite needs him to survive, and vice versa.

together as one creature with two minds, gerry becomes an entity of the corruption.

[ganondoodle]

I honestly find it impressive how totk managed to fuck up so bad as a sequel. But truth be told, good gameplay aside, botw already was a whole lot of nothing as far as story and lore were concerned. I just feel like amnesiac Link going out into the world to save some voice is not a good premise, even though botw Zelda has an interesting personality. Idk, I guess botw felt like an experiment that was supposed to pay off in totk, but totk being a disappointment makes botw kind of feel like a waste of time as well

yes and no to that (in my opinion .. just gonna add that to be sure)

what hooked me in botw was less the story that was told and more what was implied, bc it seemed to imply so much, there was so much design that felt intentional- like an introduction to a world with subtle hints towards much much more that would be perfect to dive deeply into in an expansion or second part- just like you said

i personally am a sucker for big environments with enviromental storytelling more than direct dialog in your face- it might be a small detail to some but for me the choice of music, or how little and broken there was really spoke to me (in part bc i am very noise sensitive, id gladly spent hours in botws hyrule field, but id want to get out of twilight princesses hyrule field bc it would get unbearable to me after a while)

but mainly .. it was the world, botw made me feel like no other game has before, it felt so real to me, that this is a world with deep history, most of which unknown, so much mystery and things that existed with no explicit explanation (like man do i love botws dragons ...... and i will not forgive what totk did to them lore wise)-- like with the ancient shiekah especially, they were, or seemed, so drenched in lore you can only guess but yet it felt so intentional, or how calamtiy ganon was this strange being like a force of nature and the gerudo having had no king in so long it was basically forgotten it was ever a thing?? so much to speculate and think about, so much you could do with all those things; you probably didnt aim to get this kind of talk from me but when i talk i talk unfortunately, and botw is my second favorite zelda game (grinding my teeth to dust trying to ignore what totk did to its lore)

if you look at just whats told to you, botw isnt that special either (though at least coherent in itself lol) but its the world and design and mystery that got to me, that i care about so much, care that got almost utterly destroyed by totk bc it made me realize that there .. might have been no intention behind anything, it didnt mean anything actually

its a thing that hurts me so much to know, to think about, that totk cannot be separated from botw, they cheapen each other, people think its just botw+extra, when imo its more like .. botw again but worse, or them saying that botw was jsut a tech demo to the grand game that is totk (i couldnt disagree more to that wtf, totk is more of a tech demo for ultrahand tbh)

i cant even decide whats worse to me, the fact that botw isnt gonna get that deep lore dive in a second part that got me so excited like i never was before after the first trailer, that everything i cared about in it isnt gonna have a follow up ever, the knowledge that there might be no intention and no meaning behind anything in their games, that the next games might be like that too, that its inseperable from totk in the worst way, or that they only damage each other, botw functions better on its own than totk does, but together it worsens both

(i basically just said what you said in long form .. sorry- though i do feel more positively about the amnesia thing in botw, theres tragedy and emotional weight in it and helps immensely to let you and link explore the world like for the first time- plus its a drawback to an otherwise pretty overpowered piece of tech/magic- unlike some other things in a certain other game)

[sincerely-sofie]

Chapter 5 of Sofie Plays "Slay the Princess": The Wild (Part 2)

I bet the Princess is real good at giving hugs.

[ Beginning ] - [ Previous Part ] - [ Next Part ]

Had a realization that the Narrator was suddenly real quiet and apparently had disappeared. I have questions and concerns.

Going off of the "allegory for death" theory I have running as my strong idea of what's going on here, if the Princess is death, and we're left behind after she's supposedly ended the world, does that make us time? Are we what continues on even when nothing is left to accompany us? She said there was no place where we end earlier in the chapter. Time doesn't stop.

I AM SO BAFFLED

Broken, I know you're depressed, but c'mon. There's not nothing. Theres's a big empty void! And a complimentary mirror! What more can we need? ... I'm trying to cope alright?

Said I thought I should look at the mirror and now everyone is freaking out at me about not doing that, but my eyes just went big as dinner plates when I read the above line.

"DEATH you say???? Oh goodie!"

... Oh shoot. I get it now. It's not the mirror that's scary, it's what it will show.

We have officially succumbed to the birdman allegations, lads. There's no coming back from this.

Buddy that ain't no cabin.

Wait.

Is the Princess the cabin? I thought it stood in opposition to her. During the Beast chapter, it seemed like it hated her.

Hey guys? What's the Long Quiet? :) Can somebody tell me? :) I'm confused and scared and scared and confused :))))))))

This reads to me with major "I know what you are, but what am I?" energy but like. In reverse.

Y'all I see that capital N on "Nothing." I'm looking out for that term now.

Okay okay. So the arm-y-writhing-y-thing-y deal is this being incorporating fragments of herself back into her being so that she can accomplish the goal of becoming whole and being free. The Princess is part of her, but she might not necessarily be the Princess herself.

Lots of lore got dumped. I know so little of what it truly means. I waited forever with this being and the game closed itself. So that was a very lovely heart attack :)

I accepted the fact that I will forget what I learned and told the being to make me forget. The Princess I saved had a parting request. The being assured me that I would not remember her, no matter how I try, and then I got jumpscared by my own death screen. Yay!

HEY WHAT

HUH????????

NEXT CHAPTER. I GUESS. THIS GAME IS A PRINCESS COLLECTATHON APPARENTLY.

[habitsbf]

hi, I really like your account and you always post very interesting things! I would have loved to ask you to explain the seven trials of Habit because since am very new to everymanhybrid and i just cant understand it and i know that it probably plays a big part in the lore

(Sorry if this dosent makes sense i cant really write in english so i used google translation)

AHHH YAY IM GLAD YA THINK SO :D EverymanHYBRID is a pretty confusing series to get into. theres a LOT going on in it and im more than happy to help you understand better!! ALSO SORRY THIS RESPONSE IS SO LATE </333 ive been kind of out of it lately, but im back now!! i can only go so long without posting about HABIT...

the seven trials of HABIT is a tournament that HABIT hosted a couple years ago. everyone involved in the tournament was assigned a new name under "Rabbit #XXX" and 231 participants were accepted into the trials. this included ryan (rabbit #001) who was the first one eliminated, jeff (rabbit #002), evan (rabbit #003), vinny (rabbit #004), and at the time jeff told alex that he forbidden from joining the trials, but alex ignored jeffs warning and joined anyways under rabbit #231. the other participants were viewers at the time who could join via email, but not everyone who sent in an application was accepted into the tournament.

HABIT eventually created his own Twitter account (SEVENTRIALS) and officially welcomed all the rabbits to the tournament. he then divided them all into 3 groups: angora, english lop, and netherland dwarf, which are all breeds of rabbit. the groups were divided by numbers, 1-77 were angoras, 78-154 were english lops, and 155-231 were netherland dwarfs. each group was set to hold 77 members (its clear the number 7 is important to HABIT for some reason, it appears a lot here)

what is the purpose in all this? what is the purpose of the trials? well you see, we dont know exactly. theres been multiple speculations surrounding the purpose and we dont have a real canon verified answer for it.

one thing i would like to mention is a lot of what takes place in the trials matches up to how cults function. a lot of cults require their members to do things that will strip the members of their former lives in order to make them ready for a new path. im gonna list a few examples ↓

TRIAL ONE: the rabbits had film themselves burying a cherished item of their choice.

"LEAVE YOUR LOVED ONE BEHIND."

they had to part with a beloved possession that was important to them in some way. im not sure what jeff buried, but i know evan buried the prettiest knife he had, vinny buried his special edition of ocarina of time, and alex buried a bullet he shot with his dad.

"I REALIZE YOU MAY HAVE LIVES. THAT IS UNFORTUNATE. AND WILL CHANGE."

TRIAL TWO: when congratulating the rabbits who successfully passed trial one, HABIT says "GREAT, YOUVE BURIED SOMETHING. ALL YOU HAVE DONE IS LOST ONE MORE THING THAT MAKES YOU HUMAN."

TRIAL THREE: the rabbits have to lose a friend "BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY."

"DO NOT TELL THEM WHY YOU ARE DOING THIS. BLAME IT ON THEM."

the rabbits dont even get to go by their own names, which is required in some cults. some cults make their members change their names as a way to sever ties with their past identity.

whenever the rabbits do something, he wants them to state and make it known "HABIT MADE ME DO IT."

HABIT hasnt said anything about this publicly, but HAS addressed it in 2 private chats he had with some of the rabbits. in the first conversation HABIT stated the purpose of the trials was simply "BODY COUNT", but in the other conversation HABIT stated the trials would come to and end when the last rabbit was eliminated, regardless of whether he had reached the seventh trial.

ALRIGHT THATS ALL IM GONNA LIST i definitely left some details out, but i just wanted to go over the gist of it and give a decent amount of info since this post was getting too long. if i listed every single thing that took place within the trials, this post wouldve been SUPER MASSIVE 😭 buuut if youre still curious about anything, feel free to shoot an ask my way :D

[1moreoffkeyanthem]

It’s time for another Fic Rec List fellow humans!!!

And boy howdy do I have a LOT this time lmao. A good chunk of them are Kyle-centric, bc I, like my son Stan Marsh, have been fixated on that guy. Also there are multiple from the same authors bc I find something I like and read EVERYTHING by them.

There’s a range of pairings on this list too bc I’ll read pretty much anything (still mostly style they do be my favorite) so hopefully if u see ur favorite ship or an intriguing concept this’ll steer you to somethin u like!

Here ya go!

* (rem)ember by boxwinebaddie. Ok we all knew I was gonna start the list w this one bc I am OBSESSED!!! Style holy shit! Crimson Dawn! Mentally unstable law student Kyle! RAVEN!!! The friendships and group dynamics! Rm lives rent free in my head dude plsplspls check it out!

* Painted In Shrouds by courtanie. Y’all want some Kysterion? This is one of my favorites! And NOBODY does Kenny like this author seriously. We got espionage! We got organized crime! We got overworked cfo Kyle! We got working together to take down the bad guys! We got blood and injuries and falling in love!

* Swansong by OrcaTimes. Fair warning this made me ugly cry. No one writes Craig like OrcaTimes YALL the Cryle destroyed me and doctor Craig always slays!!! It’s a beautiful story about love and grief, just GORGEOUS!!!

* Collector by cement_shoes. WHOLESOME STYLE ONESHOT!!! Them over the years, taking care of each other, Kyle handling bugs for Stan when he’s scared of them, growing up together and the trials of being human, but with someone always on your side. This one is SO sweet and gorgeously written, and a quick read too.

* A Ballad Of True Hearts by luckypoppies. Dude we all know I’m feral about SOT Style and THIS RIGHT HERE EATS!!!!! The history, the betrayal, the FANTASY VIOLENCE AND THERES THIS FIGHT SO FAR THAT SLAYS SO HARD! Being falsely accused of treason and subsequently exiled, tasked with escorting your prince to safety, GOD you just FEEL for the boys in this (plus we got them taking care of each other like yes yes gimme that fantasy whump) the world building is AWESOME I love sot AU’s and how different authors come up w the lore!

* Behind The Wall by Jwink85. Alright this one STARTS OUT nice, and is such an accurate representation of manipulative abusive relationships. Damien man holy shit. There’s so much going on in this, and the STAN PLOT OMG (yes style I love them) Kyle and Stan reconciling, Ike is my DISTRUSTING KING, high school angst, Tweek and Kyle friendship, Kenny being an icon, and I’ve said before but I love when Kyle’s written as generally wanting to see the good in people but still fiery in his own right, this is (a lot of jwinks stuff really that’s why I like their works so much) a great example of that!

* Simply Expandable by Kivea. YO WHO ORDERED THE MOB AU!!! Dude we got private investigator Craig, rival gangs, supernatural elements and mystery, conspiracy, fucking MOB BOSS KYLE?!?!? Kyle’s a bamf in this holy shit and bodyguard Stan, (this is Cryle btw and it’s fantastic) former k2, twenny, underground fighting rings, some KICKASS gang fights and the true antagonists bro the reveal was SICK! And when I say it’s a The Gangs All Here fic, I mean EVERYONE it’s wild and such a fun read it had me on the edge of my seat!

* And The Lightning Cracks The Sky by PastorCraigEnjoyer. Yeah yeah it’s cringe to rec your own shit sue me. But like Druid prince Kyle, Smokejumper Stan, forest fires, little mermaid but in the northern rockies ass plot, OVERLY PERCEPTIVE KENNY, mutual pining, magic, my beloved injury recovery (I gotta fuck Stan up ok) (I’m the worst)(giving Kyle chronic pain who me never) falling in love and saving each other’s lives, EVIL Cartman, I LOVED WRITING THIS ONE SO FUCKING MUCH it’s truly my baby.

* A quiet place (where I can scream how I love you) by sleep2thefr33zing. Coming of age style!!! So much emotional tension dude the pining is so fucking good, the first chapter is Stan’s perspective and the second one is Kyle and it’s BEAUTIFULLY PAINFUL WHEN THEYRE BOTH DOWN BAD BUT THINK THE OTHER ISNT!!! I love them being there for each other through all the bullshit of growing up, how resonant their falling outs are, it’s just so incredibly gorgeous and you really feel their emotions along with them.

* Knives by SparrowGrim. Ok so kyman isn’t my cup of tea but I’m putting it on the list bc some people do like it and this is an OBJECTIVELY FANTASTIC STORY!!! Tbh I only clicked bc I saw that it was Kyle centric (and that injury tag what can I say I eat that shit up) but I was HOOKED! Dark urbania, gangs running the streets, THE CODE NAMES SLAY SO HARD, we also got creek bunny stendy dip, the character relations are all so cool and the plot is WILD! Also Butters Kenny Stan and Craig are so badass jesus. Not even a ship I like but I loved the story.

* Peering Through Windows by Jwink85. C’mon I gotta have another jwink on the list and this one is SO. FUCKING. GOOD. K2 has been one of my favorites lately and THIS!!! We got dark cryle (my beloved) but when I say dark I mean CRAIG IS SO DEPRAVED!!! Like dude. But the story is THRILLING and artist Kenny is so kickass, Stan is a dad I literally cried over that small detail lmfao and I love jwinks Kyles and their idealistic nature (also I’m a sucker for any artist character) this story broke my heart and mended it again it’s incredible.

* Hunger Pains by Bellweather. Ain’t nobody doin Stan like bellweather MY SWEET PRECIOUS BOY UGH!!! The style is so great omg. The main four dynamic in this is wonderful, them trying to help Kyle through his ED (damn I really do read a lot of shit where Kyle’s suffering huh) all the characters are so well fleshed out and IKE I LOVE IKE IN THIS! The chapters have individual content warnings which is a great touch. Craig having prophetic dreams! Kenny dying multiple times! Chaos! Teenage camaraderie! There’s plenty of humor to make up for the dark shit but it DOES get dark. The mystery element in the beginning is really cool too I definitely have read this one multiple times.

* Find Somebody by hypercatt. STYLE!!! Stan-centric and so so so good, I love a platonic stendy team up too. some of the senior class goes “missing” and WHEN I TELL YALL I WAS so nervous that I read it out of order to make sure everything turned out okay lmao seriously this one had me WRITHING! There’s a gorgeous analogy throughout of physical hurts as a metaphor for mental illness and healing that just SPOKE TO MY SOUL!!! And there are so many beautiful moments, especially near the end, and the message of opening up and not running from your problems is beautifully written. Another one that occupies my brain lmao.

* To Have And To Hold by courtanie. Yes this is another one where Craig is SERIOUSLY DEPRAVED but hear me out!!! The plot, like I would DIE to adapt this to the screen, you feel like you’re watching a dark kidnapping race against time when reading this. And THE K2 IN THIS HOLY FUCK!!! Another one of my favorite Kennys ever and it’s so frustrating for the reader and the characters because WE ALL KNOW WHO TOOK KYLE BUT THE COPS ARENT DOING SHIT! The ending is unbelievably satisfying and the rest of the gang teaming up is so awesome STAN AND KENNY GOING FERAL OVERPROTECTIVE I live for that. But god the shit Kyle is subjected to, but he doesn’t lose that fire (Kyle ily sry)

* When The World Shakes, Hold Me by Bellweather & Blinkxs. The world building in this is PHENOMENAL!!! Post apocalyptic stuff, survival, STYLE!!! Some serious dark themes tho this is a heartbreaking read like damn check the tags frfr but the writing is MAGNETIC!

* -South Park- Style Sickfic/ Injury Fic Requests by AlwaysInSTYLE. Alright alright we all know I love my style hurt comfort and this is a request book/ oneshot series that’s JUST Stan and Kyle taking care of each other and I LOVE IT. you’d think it would get old but it DOES NOT. they’re not repetitive at all, and really fun reads! If you check it out, tell her PCE sent you we’re homies.

* Rookie Mistakes by espyonz. I love me some stenny and BRUH STANSTERION!!! Long oneshot that had me hooked. We got gentle hearted detective Stan who truly wants to protect and serve and is out of place in a corrupt police department. KENNY AS MYSTERION we know I love that shit, and he’s so awesome in this!!! The team up of Kenny Stan and Wendy to find missing people and uncover the truth behind their disappearances is AMAZING. We got Wendy as the tech girl which is SO slay (plus she and Heidi are together asjdhdks) and Kenny is hilarious in this, like he’s such a little shit and I adore this adaptation of his superhero persona. This one dropped LAST NIGHT and I’m so glad I didn’t make a red list post until now bc THIS NEEDED TO BE ON IT!!!

* Seven Candles by courtanie. Yep another one I’m tellin u, one of the best Kenny writers out there. So uhh Kyle in a Very Bad Situation again, like some of it was really tough to read. BUT!!! We got a war between heaven and hell!!! KENNY AS A FUCKING ARCHANGEL ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!? (I live for courtanie’s overprotective kenny holy shit) this is legitimately my favorite Kenny interpretation IVE EVER READ HES SO FUCKING AWESOME!!! Plus we got satan being Done with Damien’s shit lmao and Kyle making friends with a hellhound which is fun. THE FINAL BATTLE WAS SO COOL TOO I LOST MY MIND!

* Why Remind Me by Kasen. One of the best style oneshots BRUH it’s so good with such a wholesome ending and the FEELINGS CONFESSIONS!!! The boys playing superhero, then later we got high school style and an accident that leads to a reminder of a kiss and UGH ITS SO CUTE!! Just- just read this one I love it sm.

[sicknessbysalem]

submitting a formal request for another migraine fic but maybe with soren this time? If it fits of course. I feel like I remembered Soren getting migraines too, but if it doesnt work i’d just kill for some miserable Soren… idk why but MISERABLE SOREN 💳💥💳💥💳💥💳💥

(whenever you like ofc and whatever works with the lore… im just way too excited about this lmao)

honestly nonny i too am a sucker for miserable soren

theres not a whole lot of emeto in this but the general suffering i think is pretty decent

if you have any requests, comments, questions, etc., please send them my way! (mobile isnt letting me add a link?)

tw for migraine, general suffering, speech difficulties, and a sprinkling of emeto

The energy in the air was electric, vibrating through the venue like a living thing. Crew members darted back and forth across the stage, their movements quick and precise as they finalized the setup for opening night.

The soundcheck had gone smoothly, the crowd outside was already roaring in anticipation, and everything was falling into place.

Everything except Soren.

Lex leaned against the wall near the steps of the stage, his arms crossed tightly over his chest. His eyes scanned the backstage area, searching for a familiar blond head among the chaos.

Soren had disappeared right after soundcheck, saying something about needing to get something. It was less saying and more mumbling, and Lex didn’t exactly catch what Soren was saying he was going after, but in any case, that had been nearly twenty minutes ago, and Lex’s gut told him something wasn’t right.

Malik, Lex’s friend and the band’s opener, started heading for the stage, ready to open the show. Lex gave him a high five of sorts, wished him luck. Malik gave him a smile, winked at Ksenia, who was sauntering up to Lex. And then he was off.

“He’s so pretty,” Ksenia smirked, biting the tip of her nail cheekily, “Of course my girls are prettier but he might be an exception.”

“Some lesbian you are,” Lex teased.

Ksenia scoffed, “Never said I was one hundred percent gay. And you don’t seem to think I’m much of one when your boyfriend is all over me, or if you decide you’re in an affectionate mood.”

“I’m your boyfriend’s fiancé,” Lex teased, “Speaking of, what did you do to him?”

“First of all, I count you as my boyfriend too,” Ksenia said, “Second of all, I didn’t do shit to him. And don’t look at me like that. You look like you’re about to chew someone out, so what’s up?”

“Soren,” Lex said, his brow furrowing. “He should’ve been back by now.”

Ksenia raised an eyebrow. “Maybe he’s taking a breather. You know how he gets before big shows.”

Lex shook his head, his lips pressing into a tight line. “No, it’s different this time. He’s been off all day.”

“Off how?”

“Off like—” Lex broke off, exhaling sharply as he pushed off the wall. “Like I’m pretty sure something’s wrong, and he’s not saying anything because that’s just what he does.”

Ksenia’s expression softened slightly, but she didn’t argue. “Want me to help you look?”

“I’ll check the green room first,” Lex said, already heading toward the hallway. “If he’s not there, I’ll text you.”

Ksenia nodded, her gaze lingering on him for a moment before she turned back to the stage.

The green room was dim and quiet when Lex stepped inside, the faint hum of the air conditioner filling the space. Soren was there, sitting on the couch with his head in his hands. His guitar case leaned against the wall nearby, untouched.

“Soren,” Lex said softly, closing the door behind him. “Hey.”

Soren looked up slowly, his pale blue eyes dull and unfocused. His face was pale, his features pinched with pain, and Lex’s chest tightened at the sight.

“Hey,” Soren said after a moment, his voice low and halting. He lifted a hand to rub at his temple, his movements slow and deliberate.

“You don’t look so good,” Lex said, walking across the room, stopping a few feet away as to give Soren some space.

“I’m… fine.” Soren’s response was equally slow and deliberate, like he had been planning on someone asking him if he was okay and had practiced it enough to lie.

“Bullshit babe, you’re not ‘fine’,” Lex said. He crouched in front of Soren, his hands resting lightly on one of his knees. “Talk to me. What’s going on?”

Soren hesitated, his gaze flickering to the floor. Damn Lex and his ability to read Soren like a book.

“Headache,” he admitted finally, his voice barely above a whisper. “Started earlier. Thought it would… pass.”

Lex’s brow furrowed, his fingers tightening slightly against Soren’s knee. “It hasn’t, has it?”

Soren shook his head faintly, his lips pressing into a thin line. “Lights, sound… everything’s too much.”

“Shit,” Lex muttered, glancing toward the door. “Is it a migraine? Or just… really bad?”

Soren nodded slowly, his hand moving to press against his temple again. “Migraine, probably,” he murmured. “Feels like… someone’s drilling into my skull. How the fuck do you do it so much…”

Lex exhaled sharply, his stomach twisting with worry. He knew Soren didn’t get migraines often, but when he did, they were brutal—intense pain, nausea, dizziness, and everything else that came with it. And tonight, of all nights…

“Why didn’t you say something earlier?” Lex asked, his voice softer now, though there was a faint edge of frustration beneath it.

Soren grimaced. “Didn’t want to… worry you. And we’ve got the show…”

Lex shook his head, his jaw tightening. “Screw the show,” he said firmly. “You’re more important than that. Always.”

Soren’s lips twitched into a faint, humorless smile. “That’s not how this works,” he murmured. “Can’t cancel opening night. Malik on stage yet?”

“He is. Andd… maybe it doesn’t,” Lex admitted, his voice quieter now. “But we can make this easier on you. What do you need? Dark room? Water? A few minutes to breathe?”

“Dark,” Soren said immediately, his voice sharper than it had been before. “Can’t… think of anything else with all the… everything.”

Lex nodded, standing quickly. Soren’s words were getting more slurred, more slow, and it killed Lex.

“Stay here,” Lex said, his tone leaving no room for argument. “I’ll handle it.”

Within minutes, Lex had managed to dim the lights in the green room. He returned to find Soren still sitting stiffly on the couch, his hands gripping the edge of the cushion as if he was trying to ground himself.

“Better?” Lex asked, settling beside him.

Soren nodded faintly, though the tension in his body didn’t ease. “Still hurts,” he murmured. “And… speech is slow. Hard to… keep up.”

Lex’s chest tightened further, but he didn’t let it show. Instead, he reached out, brushing a hand lightly over Soren’s hair. “Then don’t worry about talking,” he said softly. “Just sit here. I’ll do the worrying for both of us.”

Soren’s lips twitched again, this time into something closer to genuine amusement. “You already do,” he muttered.

“Damn right I do,” Lex said, his tone warm despite the worry still etched into his features. He rested his hand against Soren’s knee again, grounding them both in the quiet. “And I’m not about to stop now. Here…”

Lex took off his jacket, leaving him shirtless and significantly colder than before, but he set the jacket on top of Soren’s head, a makeshift tent to block out additional light.

“you’re… gonna… fucking freeze,” Soren said, but made no move to take it off. Lex knew it helped, and added layer of controlled darkness.

“It’s all good, I was going to take it off during the show,” Lex shrugged, “I usually do. Plus I need to fix this fucking adhesive. Just breathe, and tell me if you need anything else.”

Soren nodded slowly. The muted quiet of the green room was a fragile reprieve, but the looming weight of the show hung heavy in the air.

Soren sat stiffly on the couch, his eyes closed and his breathing slow, each inhale and exhale measured like he was holding himself together with sheer will.

Soren heard the faint sounds of Lex fixing the tape on his back, holding the mic pack wires in place. He heard Lex do a few other small things, probably more show prep. Lex stayed close, close enough to help if Soren needed it. Lex’s disconnected presence was grounding as the minutes ticked by.

“We could still pull out,” Lex said softly, breaking the silence. “Call it an equipment issue or something. No one would question it.”

Soren shook his head, the movement small and deliberate. “We can’t,” he murmured, his voice slow and halting. “Opening night. Too many… people counting on us.”

“Yeah, well, I’m counting on you to not kill yourself out there,” Lex shot back, though his tone was gentler than the words. Soren felt Lex’s hand on his back, “You’re not a machine, Soren. You can’t just push through this.”

Soren’s lips twitched into the faintest hint of a smile, “You know me better than that.”

Lex sighed, “Unfortunately, I do,” he muttered. “And that’s what worries me.”

Soren didn’t respond, his head tipping back against the couch as his hand moved to press against his temple. His jaw tightened, his breath hitching faintly as the pain surged again, and Lex felt a fresh wave of helplessness wash over him. He hated this—hated seeing Soren like this, fighting through something that no amount of care or worry could fix.

After a moment, Soren let out a slow, shaky breath, his hand falling to his lap. “I’ll make it,” he said quietly, though the words sounded more like a plea than a promise. “I just… need to get through the set.”

Lex frowned, his gaze lingering on Soren’s pale, drawn features. “You don’t have to prove anything,” he said softly. “Not to me. Not to anyone.”

Soren’s eyes opened, their pale blue clouded with pain but steady as they met Lex’s after he pulled Lex’s jacket off his head. “I know,” he murmured. “But I still want to try.”

By the time they were called to the stage, the roar of the crowd had become a low, oppressive buzz that seemed to vibrate through Soren’s skull.

The dim lighting backstage offered little relief, and every shout, every clatter of equipment, felt like a knife twisting behind his eyes. He kept his head down as they made their way to their starting positions, his hand brushing against Lex’s briefly in a quiet exchange of reassurance.

Ksenia shot them both a quick look as she adjusted her mic, her sharp gaze flickering between them.

“You sure about this?” she asked, her voice low enough that it wouldn’t carry over the noise.

“No,” Lex said flatly, earning a faint smirk from her. But when Soren nodded faintly, Ksenia sighed and gave a small shrug.

“Your funeral,” she muttered, though her tone was laced with concern. “Just don’t collapse out there.”

The lights dimmed further, signaling the start of the set. Lex glanced at Soren one last time, his expression tense. “If it gets too much, just signal me,” he said quickly. “I don’t care if it’s in the middle of a song. I’ll cover.”

Soren nodded again, his movements slow and deliberate, and then the stage lights flared to life, throwing them into the spotlight.

The first song started smoothly enough, the opening notes ringing out as the crowd erupted into cheers. Soren’s fingers moved over the fretboard with practiced precision, but Lex could see the effort it took in the way his shoulders tightened, the slight tremor in his movements. The migraine was relentless, and every note seemed to cost him more energy than it should have.

By the third song, it was clear Soren was struggling. His timing faltered slightly during a transition, his fingers hesitating on the strings before catching up. It was subtle—something only Lex and Ksenia would notice—but it was enough to make Lex’s chest tighten with worry.

Soren’s jaw was clenched, his face pale and glistening with sweat under the stage lights. His gaze stayed fixed on the floor, avoiding the blinding glare of the overhead beams, but Lex could see the way his hands trembled when he adjusted his strap between songs.

During a brief pause, Lex leaned over, his voice low enough to be drowned out by the crowd. “You okay?”

Soren nodded, though the movement was jerky and unconvincing. “Fine,” he muttered, though his voice was slow and halting, the effort of speaking clear in every syllable.

Lex didn’t believe him, but there wasn’t time to argue. The next song started, and they fell back into the rhythm, though Lex kept his gaze flickering toward Soren every few seconds, his worry mounting with each faltering note.

By the end of the set, Soren was barely holding it together. His hands shook visibly as he unplugged his guitar, and his breathing was shallow and uneven, his chest rising and falling like he’d just run a marathon. Lex was at his side immediately, his hand brushing lightly against Soren’s back.

“You’re done,” Lex said firmly, his voice leaving no room for argument. “No meet-and-greet, no post-show debrief. Straight back to the hotel.”

Soren didn’t argue. He nodded faintly, his head dipping forward as Lex guided him toward the backstage area. Ksenia caught up to them as they passed the green room, her expression tight with concern.

“He looks like hell,” she said bluntly, though her tone was softer than usual. “What’s the plan?”

“Hotel,” Lex said shortly. “He needs to lie down. Dark room, quiet, the whole deal.”

Ksenia nodded, her gaze lingering on Soren. “You need anything, you call me,” she said. “I’ll handle whatever else needs handling here.”

“Thanks,” Lex said, his tone softening slightly. He didn’t stop moving, his hand steady against Soren’s back as they made their way to the car.

The ride to the hotel was silent, the dim interior of the car offering some relief from the blinding lights and pounding noise of the venue. Soren leaned heavily against Lex, his head resting on his shoulder, his breaths slow and labored. Lex kept a steady hand on his knee, grounding him as the car wove through the city streets.

By the time they reached the hotel, Soren was trembling, his body wracked with exhaustion and pain. Lex guided him carefully up to their room, helping him out of his jacket and shoes before easing him onto the bed.

“Stay here,” Lex said softly, brushing a hand lightly over Soren’s hair. “I’m grabbing water and meds. Don’t move.”

Soren nodded faintly, his eyes already slipping shut as Lex moved toward the bathroom.

As Lex filled a glass and grabbed the pill bottle from Soren’s bag, his mind raced. He hated how helpless he felt—how there was so little he could do to ease Soren’s pain. But as he returned to the bed and pressed the cool glass into Soren’s hands, he reminded himself that being there—staying close—was enough.

“Take these,” Lex murmured, his voice soft. “And then try to sleep. I’ve got you.”

Soren’s lips twitched into a faint smile, and he swallowed the pills without protest before sinking back against the pillows. Lex sat beside him, his hand brushing lightly over Soren’s arm.

-

The room was dark, save for the faint glow of the bedside lamp, which Lex had turned down to its lowest setting. Even that seemed too bright for Soren, whose face was drawn and pale against the pillows. He lay on his side, his knees pulled slightly toward his chest, one hand draped loosely over his stomach. His breaths were slow but shallow, each one marked by the faint hitch of discomfort.

Lex sat on the bed, his focus entirely on Soren. His hand hovered just above Soren’s arm, hesitant to touch too much in case it added to the overstimulation Soren was clearly battling. “How’s your head?” he asked softly, his voice pitched low to avoid adding to the noise.

Soren didn’t answer right away. His lips parted slightly, but his brow furrowed as if the act of forming a response was too much. Finally, he whispered, “Worse.”

The single word was slurred and fragmented, each syllable feeling like it had been dragged from the depths of his exhaustion.

Lex’s chest tightened, his hand finally settling lightly on Soren’s arm as he reached over and turned off the lamp. The light was on in the bathroom but the door was only cracked. The way Lex felt Soren become slightly less tense under his hand was reassuring.

“Okay,” Lex said gently. “We’ll get you through it. Did the meds help at all?”

Soren shook his head faintly, the movement so slight it was barely perceptible. “Not yet,” he murmured, his voice slow and halting. “Still… too much.”

“Too much what?” Lex pressed gently, his thumb brushing lightly over Soren’s forearm. “The light? The noise? Or just… everything?”

“Everything,” Soren whispered, his eyes squeezing shut. “Can’t… think.”

Lex nodded, his hand stilling. He knew how brutal migraines could be, how they turned every little thing—the faintest sound, the softest light, even the simple act of breathing—into an unbearable assault. And for Soren, whose body and mind already carried so much weight, a migraine wasn’t just pain; it was a full-scale shutdown.

“I’m going to make it better, as best as i can,” Lex said softly, his voice steady and calm. He leaned forward, brushing a hand lightly over Soren’s hair. “Just tell me if anything’s too much, okay?”

Soren didn’t respond, but the slight relaxation in his posture was enough of an answer.

Lex moved quietly around the room, gathering the few things he knew might help. He pulled a soft, cold compress from the minibar fridge and returned to Soren’s side, sitting carefully on the edge of the bed again.

“Here,” he murmured, pressing the compress lightly to Soren’s temple. “It’s cold. Let me know if it’s too much.”

Soren flinched slightly at first, his body tensing under Lex’s hand. But after a moment, he let out a slow, shuddering breath, his shoulders sagging faintly. “Better,” he whispered, the word barely audible.

Lex stayed where he was, holding the compress in place with one hand while the other rested lightly on Soren’s arm. “You’re doing good,” he said softly, his tone full of quiet encouragement. “Just breathe. You don’t have to do anything else.”

Minutes passed in near silence, broken only by the faint sound of Soren’s uneven breathing. Lex could feel the faint tremor running through Soren’s arm, a testament to how much the migraine was taking out of him. His stomach twisted with worry, but he kept his expression calm, knowing Soren didn’t need any added stress.

“Come… here…” Soren forced out. It broke something in Lex to hear the struggle in the two words. Lex felt Soren’s hands grab his arm, tugging him lightly.

“Yeah, okay,” Lex said softly, climbing into bed, moving his arms so one hand could hold the cold compress on Soren’s head, the other hand reaching to hold Soren in a gentle cuddle, something small but Lex hoped it would be enough. “Just breathe, you’ll be alright.”

-

The nausea came next. Lex noticed it in the way Soren’s breaths grew shallower, his chest rising and falling more quickly. Soren’s free hand moved to his stomach, pressing lightly against it as a faint groan escaped his lips.

“Hey,” Lex said softly, leaning closer. “What’s going on? Nauseous?”

Soren nodded faintly, his lips pressing into a tight line. He swallowed hard, his jaw clenching as his body tensed. “Bad,” he murmured, his voice hoarse. “Really bad.”

“Okay,” Lex said quickly, his voice calm but focused. He set the compress aside and grabbed the trash can he’d placed by the bed earlier, holding it, his other hand brushing Soren’s hair out of his face, “You’re covered, okay? Don’t fight it if it happens. Just let it out.”

Soren shook his head weakly, his breathing quickening. “Don’t want to,” he muttered, his voice thick with discomfort. “Feels worse. Fucking hurts.”

“I know,” Lex said softly, his hand brushing lightly over Soren’s back. “But holding it in just makes it harder. I’m here.”

Soren’s body tensed again, his shoulders curling forward as a sharp gag wracked through him. Lex was fast, nudging Soren enough to get him to lean over the trash can just in time, his stomach lurching violently. The sound was harsh and wet, leaving him gasping both from effort and pain as his body heaved again, the force of it trembling through his entire frame.

Lex stayed close, his hand steady on Soren’s back, his touch firm and grounding. “You’re okay,” he murmured, his voice low and soothing. “Just let it happen. I’ve got you.”

It took several minutes for the worst of it to pass. Wave after wave came out of Soren, and Lex wished he could take even some of it away from Soren When it was over, Soren slumped back against the pillows, his breaths shallow and ragged. His face was pale and clammy, his skin glistening with sweat from how much pain he was in and his eyes fluttered shut as he let out a shaky exhale.

“Water?” Lex offered, grabbing the bottle from the nightstand.

Soren shook his head faintly, his lips twitching into a faint grimace. “Not… yet.”

“Okay,” Lex said softly, setting the water bottle back on the nightstand and putting the trash can on the floor again. Lex returned the cold compress to Soren’s forehead, brushing his other hand lightly over Soren’s sweat-slicked hair. “Just rest. I’m not going anywhere.”

-

The night stretched, the hours bleeding into each other as Lex stayed by Soren’s side. The migraine didn’t let up—it rarely did quickly—but Lex stayed as close as possible, responding to every shift in Soren’s posture, every faint groan or wince.

He kept the room dark and quiet, the only sound the occasional rustle of blankets or the soft murmur of Lex’s voice as he reassured Soren.

At one point, Soren reached out weakly, his hand fumbling for Lex’s. Lex caught it immediately, his fingers curling gently around Soren’s trembling ones. “What do you need?” Lex asked softly, leaning closer.

Soren’s eyes opened slightly, their pale blue clouded with exhaustion. “Just you,” he whispered, his voice barely audible.

Lex’s chest tightened, his hand tightening slightly around Soren’s. “You’ve got me,” he said quietly, his voice full of warmth. “Always.”

Soren’s lips twitched into a faint smile, and for the first time all night, he looked just a little more at ease.

Lex had stayed glued to Soren’s side, shifting only to grab water or reposition the cold compress as needed. Soren’s migraine hadn’t eased but the worst of the vomiting had subsided, leaving behind a bone-deep exhaustion that seemed to weigh him down.

Soren lay curled on his side. His breaths were slow and uneven, each one a faint reminder of the toll the migraine was taking.

Lex sat on the bed, his hand brushing gently through Soren’s hair or rubbing Soren’s arm.

He’d been watching him for hours, his gaze flickering between Soren’s face and the faint rise and fall of his chest, as if to reassure himself that Soren was still there. His own body ached with exhaustion—his head heavy, his back stiff—but he ignored it. Soren needed him, and that was all that mattered.

“Still hurting?” Lex asked softly, breaking the silence. His voice was low, careful not to pierce through the fragile quiet of the room.

Soren’s brow furrowed faintly, his lips parting as if to speak. It took him a moment to find the words, his voice slow and halting. “Yeah,” he murmured finally. “Still… bad.”

Lex’s chest tightened, his hand brushing lightly over Soren’s hair. “Okay,” he said quietly. “We’ll keep going slow. Just focus on resting, yeah?”

Soren nodded faintly, though his expression remained tight with pain. “Hurts to… think,” he whispered, the effort of speaking clear in every syllable.

“You don’t have to,” Lex murmured, his thumb brushing lightly over Soren’s temple. “Just let me handle everything. You don’t need to do a thing.”

-

By early morning, every movement Soren made seemed to come with its own set of complications. He tried to shift onto his back at one point, but the change in position made the nausea spike again, his body tensing as he let out a soft, strained sound.

“Hey, hey,” Lex said quickly, moving closer. He placed a steadying hand on Soren’s arm, his other hand reaching for the trash can nearby. “Don’t push it. Stay where you’re comfortable.”

Soren groaned faintly, his head tilting toward Lex. “Can’t get… comfortable,” he admitted, his voice thick with frustration.

Lex frowned, his gaze sweeping over Soren’s tense frame. “Okay,” he said softly. “Let’s try something else.” He adjusted the pillows again, carefully shifting them to support Soren’s back and neck. “How’s that? Better?”

Soren let out a faint hum of acknowledgment, though his expression didn’t ease much. Lex stayed close, his hand resting lightly on Soren’s shoulder as he waited for the tension in his body to subside.

The nausea ebbed and flowed as the night went on, each wave leaving Soren more drained than the last. Lex kept a careful watch, his hand never straying far from Soren’s back or arm.

When the nausea surged again, he was quick to grab the trash can, holding it steady as Soren gagged weakly. There wasn’t much left in his stomach, but the dry heaves wracked his body, leaving him trembling and breathless.

“Easy,” Lex murmured, his voice steady despite the worry gnawing at his chest. “Just breathe through it. I’ve got you.”

Soren slumped back against the pillows when it finally passed, his eyes fluttering shut as he let out a shaky exhale. Lex reached for the water bottle on the nightstand, twisting the cap off as he leaned closer.

“Small sips,” he said softly, holding the bottle out to Soren. “You need to stay hydrated.”

Soren hesitated, his hand trembling slightly as he reached for the bottle. He managed a few careful sips before handing it back, his lips pressing into a faint grimace. “Tastes… weird,” he muttered, his voice barely audible.

Lex frowned, glancing at the bottle. “Weird how? Metallic? Sweet?”

Soren shook his head faintly, his brow furrowing. “Just… wrong.”

“Okay,” Lex said, setting the bottle aside. “We’ll try something else later. Right now, just focus on resting.”

As the night dragged into the early hours of the morning, Soren’s speech grew more fragmented, each word slower and more deliberate than the last. He tried to thank Lex at one point, his lips forming the word before trailing off into silence. Lex caught the faint movement, his heart twisting as he leaned closer.

“Don’t,” he said softly, his voice laced with quiet emotion. “You don’t have to thank me. Just let me take care of you, okay?”

Soren’s lips twitched into a faint, tired smile, though his eyes remained closed. “You’re… good at it,” he murmured after a long pause.

Lex huffed a quiet laugh, his hand brushing lightly over Soren’s hair. “Yeah, well, practice makes perfect,” he said, his tone warm despite the worry still etched into his features.

By the time the first hints of sunrise began to creep through the curtains, Soren was finally starting to settle. The sharp lines of pain on his face had softened slightly, though his breathing was still shallow and uneven. Lex stayed by his side, his hand resting lightly on Soren’s arm as he watched him drift in and out of fitful sleep.

“You’re doing good,” Lex whispered, his voice soft and steady. “Just keep resting. I’ll be right here.”

Soren didn’t respond, but his body seemed to relax a fraction, his head tilting slightly toward Lex. And for the first time all night, Lex let himself believe that things might finally be easing up.

[autisticlalna]

"You Were Right" (and a behind the scenes on how we got here)

initially i was gonna make a post going over all of Anathra's lore so far but then i realized i do not quite have the spoons for it, and also i'd like to break it up into easier to cover parts anyway. so let's jump straight into the most recent mystery!

i've already talked before about the hidden messages in Rubyco's videos, and about the split-second easter eggs in Viking's. encrypted messages aren't exactly new to Skyblock Kingdoms.

but, okay, let's rewind a little. it's 1 am, a couple days before Anathra's episode 8 premieres. i'm winding down for bed, see the premiere on my homepage, and go: hey! i wonder what Anathra's doing next episode!

hey what the fuck is that. why is there elder furthark

a bit of backstory on me: i love translating things. you probably know this by now. i also knew a guy who was big into norse mythology stuff, and that included him knowing elder furthark. so i immediately peg that as "oh, shit, that's elder furthark" and track down a translation tool.

("why are you going into backstory" we'll get to that. lol lmao.)

anyway, its 1 am, i run it through the first tool i find, and get:

someþiŋ ' weird ' happened

...or "something weird happened".

COOL. THAT'S OMINOUS.

i go to bed. when i wake up, Moxi has shared something from Anathra's discord:

...but i can't figure out what it translates to.

timeskip to the premiere.

Anathra gets a delivery from the End Kingdom after helping Josh out with villager stuff. he goes to place the shulker down, it's suddenly nighttime, and...

hey, what

iou were right

...okay, here's where we loop back to that backstory bit, and also i pull back the curtain to showcase how hilariously bad this went for the dnerds.

i recognized the alphabet as elder furthark

(and yet my dyslexic ass doesnt realize theres two rs in it until now. it has been 5 years.)

trying to translate the box name gave me gibberish ("io nht tuil")

i also knew from the "something weird happened" message that elder furthark isnt 1:1 with the english alphabet

oops there are two translator tools. oops they use different runes for "y"

due to [gestures at cherry and doak], there is a minor scuffle about if it says "you" or if it actually IS supposed to say "iou"

we still cant translate the box

still cant translate the discord message either. this is about to be really funny

people in the sbkcd are also translating it, so we compare notes

anathra steps in to save us:

THANK YOU ANATHRA <3

i am immediately embarrassed because, oops, turns out Angerthas (dwarven runs from Lord of the Rings) has alphabet overlap with elder furthark, so that's where the confusion came from. seeing as it's a post-filming decision, that does mean that the episode description and chat message were translated correctly, but the box is in Angerthas and, despite having the same runes, they do not correspond to the same english letters.

i spend a bit alternating between bonking myself for my mistake and bonking my very tired head against Angerthas for a bit until WhiteQry suggests that maybe what Anathra said in chat is the same thing. later, Aquelon is able to translate it as "IU WER RAIT". or,

YOU WERE RIGHT

...right about what?

skipping back to the events of the episode: Anathra realizes that he's lost time. he says he's only felt this "once before", doesn't know what the writing is, and is generally thrown off by... whatever just happened.

i need to rewatch Anathra's pov before i can dig into what i think the message means-- my initial guess is that it has something to do with his ?nightmare? from episode 5, although im not sure past that. considering his pov plays with the concept of the fourth wall a bit as-is, the message also might not be for Anathra (and he can't read it with glasses on either way).

Anathra's in the middle of something. there's a lot going on with him, inside and outside, and i really want to do more overviews of his lore because it's very fun. until then, keep an eye out for more strange messages i guess.

-

"hey leo you didn't translate the furthark in the 'glasses off' message, what gives" WELL, YOU SEE. I WAS TOO BUSY BEING EMBARRASSED AT THE TIME TO PROCESS IT. AND IT WASNT UNTIL WRITING THIS POST AND GETTING THAT SCREENSHOT THAT I SAW IT AND WENT "wait. hold on" AND RAN IT THROUGH THE TRANSLATOR.

AND THEN REALIZED, AFTER FOUR DAYS, THAT ITS THE URL OF THE SITE IM USING TO TRANSLATE THIS AND IT JUST GOT KINDA MANGLED BECAUSE OF THE "NOT 1:1 WITH ENGLISH ALPHABET" THING.

im in hysterics. how did this happen. please dont ever think im professional. all of these super cool in-depth explainer posts are the end result of so much clownery but i needed to show you guys just how much of a MESS this is lmao

[enigmamirror]

Yknow, i'm rewatching atla after reading the yangchen novels, and I really appreciate the small meaning behind some things a lot more now. In s3 e11 The Western Air Temple, combustion man shows up and wrecks the place. I always found this sad because the preservation of air nomad culture and architecture was something shown many times to be important to Aang, so the temple being destroyed is really tragic in that way. But also, Yangchen is a western air temple nun. And we can see statues of her there in the episode. So reading the novels and then seeing how her statue is focused on more at the western than any other is a nice touch that shows how much detail the og show had in it. These little nods to what eventually would become lore is amazing.

But as much awe as it inspires, theres symbolism without (imo) even trying to be. In the Yangchen novels, combustion bending is seen for the first time in the atla world, it was written as the biggest plot point and the worldwide threat of the novels. And we see Yangchen and her struggle against it. Things like Nujians death, Yangchens banishment, all of her struggles in the novels are some sort of result from her dealing with combustion benders. And she is from the western air temple. Which is salt in a centuries old wound. Yangchen, an air nomad, a pacifist by culture, who worked so hard to avoid taking lives when she was able, who lost so much because of combustion bending as a technique, who came from the western air temple,

Her home, was destroyed

By the very

Technique

That cost her so much already.