#whatever gege told you was a lie

[shoot1ngst4r]

happy birthday to my amazing and lovely and caring husband nanami kento who DIDNT die in shibuya and came back home and is alive and well <3

[runabout-river]

Thoughts on JJK chapter 267 (spoilers)

We're coming to the end of the manga 😭

But our girl has come back! After 150 chapters? Nobara enters the fight with the predictions everyone had about her coming true: she has an eyepatch now and she used Resonance on Sukuna's last finger.

Last December I made a meta post outlining every piece of information we had on the situation and how those come together to facilitate Nobara's return. So if you're confused about that, read the post to get a feel for the mechanics that are at play here before they get revealed in the next chapters.

It's so funny how you could instantly tell that Yuta is inside Gojo and vice versa 😂

We get new information that switching souls unlike possessions doesn't grant the user access to the memories of the host. The same is true for Rika ingesting body parts to use copy on others.

We get info on how Yuta's copy works and it's not as overpowered like that but how did Yuta use copy on Inumaki before he lost his arm? It could be that Yuta, as he said, made BV to limit his usage but it could also be that Yuta can use copy without cannibalism but his count is limited to 3 or 4 CT as Yuki told us once.

Using Rika to copy more CT after that might be why body parts are required now 🤔

It's cute how Ui Ui is just sleeping while leaning on Yuji.

Yessssss!

The thing why this works so late in the manga is that Nobara didn't have open story plots left over after getting "killed". Outside of meeting Saori (which will happen when she's alive) her character arc was complete which was why the setup of her death itself was the biggest reason why we didn't believe she died.

For Megumi this is another thing though. He's full of incomplete character development, open plot threads and set ups. And I'm not gonna lie it's making me nervous how Gege will resolve all of that.

Even Sukuna still has open stuff going on: what were his origins? Why did he look sad in Yorozu's flashback? Why did he decide to turn into 20 fingers?

The last chapter will be extra long so with that and the three other chapters there is enough space at least to tackle Sukuna and Megumi together, but man...

Is it just me or do others also think that Gege has enough material and support/fame to just... make Jujutsu Kaisen 2 when he wants to? Like straight up give the manga a Shibuya like ending with the merger wreaking havoc and then make a time jump to 2024 and start JJK even more Kaisen...

Resonance

It's not shown but Utahime and Gramps might have used their support again to increase Nobara's CE output.

Also why was it just now that she woke up? Did sth happen that triggered it or was it a double effort from those around her to get her out of her coma?

And what if they actually did switch training with Nobara? Nobody told Yuji of course but it could've happened to get a healer inside of her and to get her up to speed to what was happening right now so she could make an effort to properly wake up again

When Nobara uses Resonance Yuji has a tear in his eyes 😢

And it's another blink and you'll miss it panel but after Dismantle with Yuji's next punch Sukuna pukes out his fingers again! 4 or 5 are on the ground now

So they will defeat him by literally ripping him apart from Megumi until he's 20 fingers again.

The thing is Sukuna has consumed his old body too and it might not be possible to get that out of Megumi. Megumi will not only carry mental scars from this, as well as whatever the Bath might've done to him, but part of Sukuna's essence might very well stick with him until he dies.

But also this fingers puking out business very well guarantees that Sukuna won't die by the end of the manga... jjk2

What will happen to Tengen and the merger is another big mystery right now.

The three-fold visual of Sukuna getting hit by Resonance, Dismantle and then Black Flash is awesome and shows how Sukuna is at the end of his rope. As said at the end of the last chapter, this might've very well been the last Shinjuku chapter.

I can see next chapter starting with a Sukuna flashback that should (!) turn around until we land back with Megumi.

Overall an awesome comeback for Nobara with all our she's alive theories confirmed. Now the only things left are a deep dive into Sukuna and a Megumi resolution...

[yggdraseed]

Thinking About the Itadori Family

Spoilers for Jujutsu Kaisen. Reader beware, you're in for a scare!

I find Kenjaku a fascinating character in a lot of different ways. There's always a game being played and a lie being told, and yet there's still this damp, flickering spark of humanity under all the theatrics, bullshit, and centuries of accumulated junk.

When Kenjaku escorted Itadori's former classmate from aeons ago back in chapter one out of the Sendai Colony, there was this really interesting softness they display nowhere else. Gone is all the pretense of mocking others and keeping secrets... perhaps because they knew most of it would be forgotten, as dreams often are. But it seems like Kenjaku may have given away some deep insight into the nature of sorcery by casually mentioning the "Cursed Realm" - which has never, to my knowledge, been mentioned before or since. Not only that, but Kenjaku tells her something truly shocking:

"Thank you for getting along with my son."

Like, you can see how weird this is, right? Face to face with Yuji, Kenjaku says, "I expect great things from you." Talking with Choso while Yuji isn't in the room, Kenjaku talks about him like some object; a mere vessel, the eye of the storm for the age to come. Talking with a non-sorcerer teenage girl who's unlikely to remember much, if any of the conversation, Kenjaku accepts Yuji as their son and expresses gratitude that she was kind to him.

So, is this a "Who we are in the dark" moment of honesty? Is this the consequence of Kenjaku being a composite of all these different personalities bubbling to the surface at different times? It's really, really hard to say. But I like the idea that somewhere at the bottom of it all, there is genuine love, if misguided in its expression. That's what I want to run with.

Personally, I've seen theories that Kenjaku duped Jin, or somehow used sorcery to enthrall him, or that Jin simply went insane before or after Kaori died and wasn't in his right mind. I think those are all possible, and they're more straightforward answers. But I want to get off the road and into the woods and see where I end up.

What if Jin knew? What if a pact was made to try to bring Kaori back, and even when the person who came back wasn't Kaori, Jin was still grateful? What if Jin was just grateful to get to see Kaori smile one last time, to get to hear her voice one last time, even if he knew in his heart it couldn't be the same ever again? Just like when Yaga brought Takeru back as a cursed corpse for Kusakabe's sister, so she could hear her son's voice and hug some part of him one last time.

And what if genuine love grew out of that gratitude? What if seeing this acceptance and kindness in Jin, of having someone give gratitude and a wish to be by Kenjaku's side, started to morph and change who Kenjaku was without them realizing the full ramifications of that at first?

What if that ache for a family, for a place to belong, for some connection to other human beings, has carved itself open inside this nomad of flesh and time? Journeying across a thousand years and potentially dozens of bodies, duping themselves into thinking they only cared about their grand experiment, only to narrowly dodge getting ensnared by their human heart and spending all this time since then trying to ignore their own humanity?

I still have a feeling Kenjaku isn't quite dead yet, and I want to believe a change that was started by Jin will have been finished by Takaba. With Kenjaku realizing they do want other people, that they do want to see human potential, not the potential of this mad experiment. And that they'll now be gunning to change the outcome of the Merger, in whatever way is possible.

Though I think this is probably just me spinning my own theories out into something that doesn't even resemble GeGe's plan. But hey! Each theory I make that's proven untrue by the author is an idea I can use in my own writing for free.

[lizhly-writes]

hi there, i got stuck in weird au land for my not-cnovel. have this.

“I hate you,” Yang Haoran said, and meant it.

He didn’t like his twin brother. There had always something wrong with Yang Haoyi – so calm, so obliging, so perfectly opinion-and-emotion-free. Yang Haoran knew that there were emotions and opinions there, of course, but Yang Haoyi cared so little about expressing them that they might as well not have been there at all. That was Yang Haoyi – a boy who thought that nothing he ever said or did ever made a difference, and so mindlessly followed the first person who told him what to do. It was spineless. It was pathetic. Yang Haoran was ashamed to share the same face as him.

All of this was true. None of this stopped him from pulling out the medical kit and pushing his brother down into a sitting position.

“Whatever you say, gege,” Yang Haoyi said placidly, the irritating little shit he was. Sometimes, it seemed there was nothing that would make a dent in his sheer indifference. It was a fair assumption, except that wasn’t actually how Yang Haoyi worked, he just kept pretending nothing affected him ever because he was a delusional piece of -

Yang Haoran wanted to punch his brother in the face. He had, in fact, punched him in the face before, multiple times, when they were both children, before Yang Haoran realized that it never did anything. It was like punching cotton; Yang Haoyi would get back up again with only the barest complaint, as if he had never been hurt at all.

It was always hard to tell when Yang Haoyi had been hurt. It was lucky that Yang Haoran was better at it than the rest of their entire fucking family.

Today, Yang Haoyi was favoring one side over the other. Yanking up his shirt revealed a colorful variety of bruises blooming over his ribs.

“Jiang Mingxi,” Yang Haoran hissed.

It wasn’t a question. Yang Haoyi shrugged. “It was sparring practice,” he offered, which was a lie, because they had the exact same martial arts classes, the most recent of which Jiang Mingxi had had no time to even touch Yang Haoyi, because she had been occupied by Yang Haoran trying to kill her.

“No, it wasn’t. Try again.”

Yang Haoyi tilted his head. “Unsupervised sparring practice.”

“You mean Jiang Mingxi was beating you up outside of class.” Yang Haoran pulled out an ice pack from his minifridge and pressed it against Yang Haoyi’s side. “Better?”

“It’s really okay,” Yang Haoyi said. “And she wasn’t beating me up. She wanted a sparring match--”

“What do you say when your older brother takes care of you?” Yang Haoran snapped.

Yang Haoyi’s mouth twitched, like he wanted to smile. “...Thank you, gege.”

“That’s right,” Yang Haoran said. “You say thank you. You don’t keep making excuses for your shitty fiancee.”

“She just wanted to spar--”

“What did I just say.”

Yang Haoyi actually did smile then, and followed that up with a laugh. Yang Haoran really wanted to punch him in the face.

“If you let Jiang Mingxi push you around again, I’ll kill her,” Yang Haoran said flatly.

“...That’s not how the saying usually goes, you know. You’re supposed to threaten my life, not hers.”

“That would ruin the point.”

[randomingoftherandomness]

🏘️ could we have a sick fic? 💕

🏘️ Cabin fever (literally) 

There’s sweat beading on the back of Yuanzhi’s neck. It darkens the fine hairs on his nape and sticks the collar of his loose sleep shirt to his skin. The skin is a little flush, probably from Yuanzhi’s fever that has yet to break.

Shangjue leans in. Carefully rearranging Yuanzhi’s hair so that it isn’t liable to be tugged on and pulled. It’s been two days like this.

“Don’t—“

He dips his hands under Yuanzhi’s shoulders and the backs of his knees, hauling him up to a seated position. With patient tenderness, he starts to help Yuanzhi undress.

“You can leave this for the maids,” Yuanzhi croaks, swaying in his arms. Blinking mulishly, he weakly holds on to the cotton sleeve of Shangjue’s blue robe. “Aren’t you bored of being stuck in the room with me? This isn’t something you should be doing for me.”

His breath is heavy with the scent of medicine and not for the first time since he’d been told by one of the Zhi residence’s Jade Guardians that Yuanzhi had collapsed in his lab, he wonders how stupid his beloved Didi can be.

“I want to,” Shangjue says. “I am willing.”

Carefully untying the knot that keeps the front together, he has Yuanzhi lean against him while he strips him of his shirt. With deft hands, he gently wipes Yuanzhi clean — armpits, inside his elbows, torso, his neck — and not so subtly takes his pulse and checking the way he breathes a little rasping on the exhale as he redresses him in a fresh new shirt. Shangjue is not half the medically gifted his Didi and Elder Yue is, but he can manage when he has to.

Then with some well-practised manoeuvres, and not a small amount of whining from Yuanzhi that is quickly quelled by a glare, he has his trousers off to do very much the same. Wiping down his legs, hips all the way down to toes. Running the damp cloth over the soft skin of his inner thigh, smirking a little when it makes his Didi shiver.

“Get better first. Then I’ll let you do whatever you want, you brat.” Shangjue laughs, moving quickly to dress him again.

“Ge...”

Shangjue focuses first on switching out the basin of water for another one with water that is a little cooler from being left out. With a fresh cloth, he dampens it and starts to wipe at Yuanzhi’s face. Brows, eyelids, cheeks. Down the line of his nose. The backs of his ears, then back to his temple.

“Gege…”

“Hm?” Shangjue answers, looking into Yuanzhi’s eyes. He smiles when he sees the flush on his cheeks that has decidedly nothing to do with his fever.

“Thank you, Gege,” Yuanzhi mumbles. It’s adorable when he gets all shy like this and the knowledge that he is and will always be the only privileged enough to see this doesn’t escape him.

Wrapping him up in his arms, he moves Yuanzhi back while he strips their bed and lays a new sheet. Dumping all the water into a bucket and gathering all the laundry in another, he sets them by the door for the maids to come collect.

Climbing back onto the side of the bed, he helps Yuanzhi lie down, brushing a kiss over the crown of his head.

“I wouldn’t have trusted anyone else to do this for you,” He starts. “No one could have taken care of you as well as I can.”

Yuanzhi scrunches his face at that. Shangjue has to laugh.

“Too cheesy…”

[dimpledlianfang]

The Huli jing

(Sadly the juniors weren't there because they went night hunting)

Yangyang laoshi.

*Everyone crowding over, petting something.*

Nhs: Ah he's so cute!

Mxy: Baby.

Lxc: Want a loquat?

Sms: Get that Lan fruit away from him!

Xue yang: hi simps!

Gosh. Now what are they up to now.

I can't leave them alone, can I?

Correction. I never should have left them alone with Jiggy.

Mingjue: lol he's now the class pet. But the question is, does he have rabies?

Xichen: Dage, it's A-Yao we're talking about.

Su she: have some respect!

Xue yang: what?!!

Ohhhhhhhhh. You found foxyao.

Yao: *lying, blanketed, in lan xichen's arms* oh hey Chengmei.

Xue yang: why have you turned my class into a simp club

Mo xuanyu: it was always a simp club.

Xue yang: you're right.

Nhs: isn't he cute?

Yao: can someone groom my fluff?

Xue yang: *laughing* Jiggy! You pampered little diva!

Lan xichen: *crying in cuteness* his FLUFF? I'm gonna die.

Su she: a.k.a his tail. Now do it for him.

Lan xichen: it would be an honour.

Xue yang: Daozhang give me the strength. To put up with these simps.

Yao: I want Dage to groom my tail first. Then er ge.

Mingjue: why?!!

Yao: because I know you want to.

Mingjue: WHAT?! Who told you that?!

Lan xichen: whatever you want. I'll wait.

Mo xuanyu: can I hold him?

Lan xichen: sure. Hold him gently. And support his body.

Mo xuanyu: yea I got this.

Lan xichen: then give him to Dage.

Mo xuanyu: yea.

Awww foxyao gege is the cutest.

Yao: oh thank you, A-Yu.

Xichen: A-Yao, how did you turn into a huli jing?

Yao: I was messing around with some rituals. Now I can transform as I please. And I'm loving it!

Mo xuanyu: here you go dage.

Mingjue: *rolls eyes*

Huaisang: be careful with him, Dage.

Mingjue: I won't drop him, Huaisang! Relax!

Su she: now hurry up. I have to put him to sleep.

Xue yang: Yaoyao, you even have a schedule for everyone?! Lol!!

Am I on the list?

Yao: yea. You can groom me, once I fire dage.

Mingjue: do you think that I wanted to do this?!!!

Yao: yes, yes you do, Dage.

Fine Chengmei, since that Dage is being jealous again. You can give me a manicure.

Xue yang: of course Jiggy! But why would a fox need a manicure?

Yao: ufff....Chengmei. my claws do grow out. So it must be properly taken care of.

Xue yang: *nods* LOL

Enough explaining. I'll do your manicure.

Mingjue: *holding little foxyao on his lap and brushing his tail.* you know this is kinda cute.

Xue yang: *grumbling* Jiggy wants a manicure.

He's really adorable, but he wants a manicure.

Xichen: awwww.

Huaisang: San ge!!!

Hey San ge, please don't fire Dage. He has a sect to feed.

Mingjue: I'm not getting paid to do this!!

Yao: of course you are.

Su she: Zongzhu runs the harem.

Yao: can someone get that itch behind my ear?

Xichen: got it!

Su she: back off!!

Xichen: he would want me to do it! A real Lan!

Su she: I'll rip your hair off!

Xue yang: yea rip off his weave!

Yao: Minshan.

Su she: yea. I'll scratch it for you.

Yao: such a darling.

Er ge, can I have those loquats?

Xichen: of course.

Xue yang: so what are you going to do, nie twink?

Huaisang: I take him on walks.

Yao: but I rather er ge. I sense negativity around Huaisang.

Huaisang: San ge!

Yao: did I lie?! *grins*

Mo xuanyu: I would appreciate that you keep your negative energy to yourself. It's bad for Yao gege. And especially when he's a tiny little fox.

Xichen: a tiny helpless little fox.

Su she: a tiny helpless little fox with dimples!

Huaisang: what negative thing did I do?!! San ge is the negative one!!! He bit me and my fan!

Yao: because you taste like loquats.

If you don't want me to bite you, then stop tasting like it.

Xue yang: lol why do you taste like loquats?!

Huaisang: sometimes I meet with er ge. And....bribe him to break up with San ge. And he smells like loquats most of the time.

Xue: *wheezing* LAN LIPS SMELLS LIKE LOQUATS!!

And ice face smells like sandlewood!!!

Su she: can you buy a sweeter smelling perfume. *disgusted* that don't smell like bush.

Xichen: hey, the scent just stuck on me!

Xue yang: why do you want Jiggy to break up with Lan lips, you little sneak!

Huaisang: I don't really know actually. I just thought that it would be fun.

Yao: and you're wondering why I'm using your fan as a chew toy.

Huaisang: noooo, san ge, how dare you!

Mo xuanyu: that's so genius, Yao gege!

Su she: awww.

Xichen: he loves to chew on fans. Because he's sophisticated just like that.

Xue yang: Huaisang, get to the back of the class.

Huaisang: *pouting*

Su she: take your negativity with you!

Huaisang: Dage!

Mingjue: I can't come. I'm holding foxyao.

Huaisang: *sobbing* how could you!!

He casted his spell on you too!!

Xue yang: that's how the simp club works. Jiggy just have to breathe for the simps to start their simping.

..

@verycatbluebird

[franeridart]

Anon said: Hi I hope u don't mind but I was wondering if I could get your opinion on JJK??? Do u like where the story is going & how r u enjoying jjk so far? Is there anything u dislike or have any nitpicks about jjk? Is there anything, if u could, change about jjk? Is there any characters u don't particularly care for or don't like? Sorry to bombard u with sooo many questions I'm just really curious about ur opinion >w<

OH I don’t mind the question at all! Though let me be clear right now that this is going to be a completely subjective answer and also that it’s going to be heavy with spoilers. 

Okay, first things first, if I had to give jjk a general vote on a scale from 1 to 10 it’d be a 8, and that’s only because I read the prequel too! Right after catching up with the manga without any knowledge of the prequel’s existence it was a 7, barely (since Gege tends to treat the prequel in the main story as if you’re supposed to know about it, with all the mentions of Yuuta and Geto and stuff, but then never tells you anywhere in the manga that you were supposed to read it? Or that it exists at all? It even has a different name than the main story! I read the manga with the serious feeling that I was missing something, which I was and no one told me. Didn’t like that very much, ngl). 

I still enjoyed it greatly and binged it all in a day and a half, but, you know, I’ve never thought it a perfect story. Am I enjoying how it is and where it’s going? Yeah, yeah, immensely! I adore it, really, if my drawing it 24/7 for the past over half a year wasn’t proof enough 😂 but it tends to go too fast at times for my tastes, it isn’t especially good at exposition and has confused the everloving hell out of me more than just once. Also it’s chokefull with stuff you’d call foreshadowing that ends up meaning nothing at all in the end and that’s, like, something I wish Gege didn’t do since I tend to overthink these kind of things and then feel disappointed when nothing comes out of it 😂😂 that’s on me tho.

If I had to change anything about it.................no, nothing, I’m good with how it is. Like, it has a lot of problems, definitely, but it wouldn’t be the jjk I fell in love with if it was anything else. Do I think everyone will die by the end of it? Yeah. Am I sad some characters already have died? Very much so. I’m still good with how it is tho, it’s just how jjk is. What else...uhhhhhh right, the characters! I don’t have any I especially dislike or hate aside from Mahito, which I just can’t stand sorry Mahito stans he just isn’t my cup of tea at all 😂 I do have characters I don’t particularly care about, like... Ichiji? For example, or Kusakabe, or most of the Kyoto kids (even Kokichi and Mai only became characters I liked after they died tbh, aside from Miwa and Kamo I’m not particularly into any of them). I haveeeeeee mixed feelings about Yuki, but only cause I feel she outright used Geto’s kind heart and depression to reach her own goals in a way that felt a lot like just an experiment for a theory she had, and I live and die for Geto so you can see why I would resent her for this 😂 but other than that she’s pretty cool, so I’m on the fence with her (again, sorry Yuki stans, I don’t have anything against you all 🙏)

That’s it! Overall I love jjk and I’m fully on for the ride, but I wouldn’t lie to anyone and call it perfect 😂 it’s better tho, I like stories that can fail me and have in the past failed me more, I’m more relaxed while reading them

Anon said: hey Fran!! quick question, are you a self taught artist or did you take any classes? hope ur doing well!— ^^

Self taught! As I’m sure anyone who studied art can easily tell  😂 I do my best with the resources I have 💪 I hope you’re doing well too!!!

Anon said: i also struggled with csm in the beginning, but idk after a few chapters i got into the mood and style of humor and now, after finishing it, i think about it all the time 👁 cant wait for you to see the show and if you end up liking it <3 also; ur art is everything!! whatever you draw, it gives me so much serotonin

Ahhhh I hope so I hope so!!!! I want to like it so bad, the art for it are absolutely incredible I wanna enjoy them properly!! 😭 And thank you so so much!!!!!! 💕

[mrskurono]

a/n: the second chapter! This was going to be longer but I decided to divide it up into two for ease of reading. Gege gives us no canon idea yet so who knows if any of this is right word count: 2k tags: post!Shibuya arc, takes place during this current arc in the manga, I can’t say manga spoilers bc we don’t know what’s going on, Culling Game content character(s): Noritoshi Kamo, fem!sorcerer reader pt l

No lie when you descended the mountain side from the empty temple. 

In fact you had never seen so many cots and sleeping arrangements in one place. Every piece of floor under Kamo name seemed to have a pair of feet on it. Most of them not even familiar with the grounds. Many of them found outside in this mess just like you had been. All of them proclaiming thanks to the young heir who'd shepherded them to this safe haven at least.

Displaced. And taken in without question. Noritoshi truthfully wasn't lying. At least about this.

Among those rescued were bunches of children. Someone knowing where their parents were. And some less fortunate. When a group of them who'd been seen without a parent or guardian since you came, were circled around a little girl who'd tripped. You found a moment of purpose to help when everything else was in disarray. 

Wiping clean your hands on the backs of your pants after helping get the smudge of dirt off the little girls knees. And assure the rest of the kids that there was no blood and no one was going to get them. They were put at ease and acting more like rowdy kids as they began to go their own way once again. You don't quite hear what the cluster of kids said when they run off in the opposite direction. Unaware of most things but what was right in front of them after you consoled them. 

Instead of what was right in front of you, your eyes drift up towards the same thing you had been staring at every day since descending down the hill.

"It got bigger."

More than just caught off guard. You whip around to the semi familiar voice behind you. Noritoshi, with his arms crossed under the sleeves of his robes as he leans into the side of the doorway the kids originally tripped through. He was looking exactly at what you were as well. Looming over most of the city and Kyoto countryside was an eye sore more than just a new building. 

A blotch along the skyline. 

Devoid of light and overshadowing everything else. Even at high noon it felt like days had become dimmer since that thing blossomed into existence. Just like the rank stench of a curse. Whatever that thing was left your nostrils burning and skin crawling.

Noritoshi pushed off the door frame and straightened back up, "Do you have a moment?"

"Seems that's all I have these last few days." You retort to your host. Gracious as he was. The past two days felt nothing short of cabin fever from feeling so useless amongst the uncertainty. Not as humorous about it as you seemed to be. You redact your comment and answer him, "Yeah what?"

Still facing up towards the nameless bubble that overtook much of Kyoto, Noritoshi came beside you to clear his throat and lower his voice, "I was wondering if you gave anymore thought to what I told you."

Your eyebrow arched up, "That I can kill you if you lied to me?" The Kamo family head was not amused again so you folded your arms and stiffened up a little, "That sounded like gibberish. How am I suppose to believe anything you said when communications are basically down."

"The heads of the family have always been in contact," Noritoshi drew his attention away from the looming threat and back onto you, "The clans existed before the elders even. Besides, we were allotted more direct information today."

"Ok?" 

"I'd like to that to show you."

This sounded like a favor being disguised as something else. You hold onto your breath unsure what was in the best interest of you or anyone at this point. All you really knew was everything stunk like a persistent curse and you wanted it to end.

"Why aren't the clans working together then?" You poise a real question any sane thinking human would come up with. While equipped to deal with curses you did not feel equipped to deal with the politics of it all. 

A grimace on his face unlike the one the day before, "Things are....less than ideal."

"Really?"

Noritoshi wasn't delighted with your tone.

You sigh and decide against anything to self serving at his expense, "Fine. If it means possibly keeping everyone safe then what is it?"

That caught him slightly off guard, "What about yourself?" Noritoshi asked frankly.

Of course you scowl that someone from one of the clans would ask that, "I didn't become a Jujutsu Sorcerer to keep myself safe."

Admirable. He had to nod to that. Turning away quickly when he beckoned you to follow him back towards the innards of the Kamo estate.

Unlike the last time you were invited into what could only be described as a mock situations room. That had been involving dirty stares from a handful of men you didn't know or even heard of. And your credentials as a sorcerer scrutinized even in a time of panic when you thought help would be welcomed with open arms. Apparently the clans firmly held onto the idea that those serving themselves was severing everyone around them. You objectiably had different ideas about sorcery. 

Thankfully unlike last time when you had to deal with a room full of stuffy mindsets. You were surprised but worried to find no one awaiting to tell you that you couldn't be in there. 

What was there happened to be a jumble of papers, or what could constitute as a jumble, and two chairs pulled away from the table. Something about the urgency of such a small meeting left your skin crawling seeing the mess. Unease not worn often on your exterior. You looked around at the papers on the table and no one going over them.

"What is this?" You pick up the first few on the top with what appeared to be Noritoshi's hand writing all over them. Most of it seemed like chicken scratch saved for one word you picked out of the bunch, "Culling? What? What is this?"

Somber look on his pale features left Noritoshi gathering his thoughts like he was doing to the papers strewn out, "The heads of the family received more information on what those things seem to be connected to."

"Why aren't you discussing this with your clan then?" 

A pause from the man next to you, "...it seems alliances are already being formed."

Your brows pinch together leaving you to search for more of the papers on the table for an explanation, "Alliances? Alliances of what? What does this have to do with the giant stink ball in Kyoto? Or the curses? What does this have to do with what you told me yesterday about the Shibuya incident report?"

Something unfamiliar on the Sorcerer's face. You hadn't seen it yet. Something accustomed to worry crept onto Noritoshi and he handed you one piece of paper yet to make it into your grasp, "You couldn't have any idea working independently. That's why I asked you to come look these over. I just...I need someone to tell me they're reading this like I am."

Swelling your chest with a deep breath. You snatch the paper from him with a skeptical look once over. Whatever could be conjured up to add worse news to the unleashed curses rampaging across Japan. You held your breath with your eyes scanning it over. Feeling the air in you slowly draw out. Just as you finished the last few sentences. Suddenly you understood what could have made this worse.

"...it wants us to die..." Hands clammy and grasping for another deep breath, you read over the part again about the nineteen day warning. 

No, it wasn't a warning. This was an outright threat.

You shake your head trying to count the days that had melded together in your mind since everything went haywire, "That means...well, one...two...four-"

"Every Jujutsu Sorcerer has two weeks," Noritoshi having already done the math tipped his head down to scan the table for something. He took the deep breath you just couldn't seem to get a hold of. He grabbed for a paper tucked under pens and you watch them roll and scatter away from him, "...As of yesterday I may have sent a small handful of Kamo members to check the site out."

"Before you go this information?"

Noritoshi nodded, "I got this only an hour ago." He focused on the paper in front of him, "There were five sorcerers sent....and none of them have contacted me since they left."

Rightfully so you didn't like where this was going.

"I need to go look for them...I can't leave people to die like this." Noritoshi, though most the time calm and without a crack to his facade, faced you with both his eyes open and a waiver to his tone, "Will you come with me? Please, if something is going to happen to other sorcerers I can't let them be a victim of my own faults."

Much like the confrontation when you both ran into each other in the abandoned temple. This request left you at odds with your choices. Like coming with him or staying up at the temple alone. You could go with him. Or you could tell him no.

No meant possibly saving your own hide. But thinking about what those papers said, well, saving yourself seemed to mean nothing with a countdown. Only slight extension of the inevitable.

"Who will stay here to watch the civilians then?" A real concern you saw with non sorcerers piled into one place. The buffet for a curse or two that might catch a whiff of the displaced humans.

"I have sorcerers stationed here. With a single grade two member and a handful of semi-grade two sorcerers." Noritoshi had planned straticigally even before knowing everything that came into light, "You're at least a semi-grade one I take it."

The assumption irked you as you hadn't divulged anything yet to him for the sake of keeping as many tokens stacked in your favor, "....something like that, I suppose."

"Then we should be ok for any curses if we're careful."

"And why ask me instead of one of your own?"

"Because...." Noritoshi dropped his gaze down to the mess in front of him, "...I can trust someone who has no ties to the clans." He stopped and looked at you, "You'll kill me if I'm lying, which means more people will be safe if in fact sorcerers are turning on people."

He was right. About killing him. Not once had the thought left since being on high alert during all of this. If everything you read on those notes were right then going alone was suicide. For either of you.

"...One promise," You firmly demand. Noritoshi remains silent but nods. Finally with a deep breath you find your calm, "...neither of us go in that thing until the eighteenth day. Even if your members already went into it."

He held out on your words for a moment. Either mulling them over or finding something to make you promise. Finally Noritoshi spoke up, "...what happens on the eighteenth day then?"

What would happen? You could see if this set of rules was a bluff or you could comply. Either outcome seemed grim with little control for anyone at all. Faux hope with what you said next.

"On the eighteenth day we both go in." You said somberly, "I'll go in with you and anyone else you deem trustworthy enough." 

For a second it looked like he was going to carry on about something. But there was one thing you had to remind him to see crystal clear about all this.

Stepping close to the sorcerer your voice lowers and you make him look at you, "...I will kill you if you're lying. That promise still stands. Either you're on my side or your not....culling game or not, I won't let someone rule over me. Got it?"

Maybe he was getting use to it. Or perhaps Noritoshi believed you both to be truthfully on the same side now. He gave a nod and didn't falter, "I expect nothing else from the angel of death I met on the mountain side."

[heartslogos]

outtakes [79]

“Ge,” Hu Tao says.

“No,” Xiao replies immediately. And then puts one hand over the pocket with his wallet and another over the pocket with his phone. “Ask Aether.”

“Did I ever tell you that between you and Aether, I consider you the better half? You’re funnier.”

“You’re decided. And that doesn’t work on me. I know Aether’s funnier than I am. You can’t lie to me to get me to do things for you.”

“Oh, come on, you don’t even know what it is!” Hu Tao pokes Xiao’s shoulder with both hands, right and left, right and left. “Dage. Daxiong. Xiong. Ge. Gege.”

“I said no, I meant it.”

“Come on. I know you pretend to be a hard ass. But we both know that you’re the absolute softest out of all of us. Even Chongyun’s harder than you are. Hehe.”

“Go harass Chongyun instead, then. It’ll be more of a challenge.”

“Hey now, on a sliding scale you and didi aren’t exactly leading examples,” Hu Tao waves her hands. “If I wanted a challenge I’d go to Yanfei or Ganyu. I’d go to Azhdaha-laoshi.”

“You’d pester my shushu?” Xiao glares at her, “Are you really that shameless? Don’t you have your own family to harangue?”

“He thinks it’s fun,” Hu Tao points out. Shushu does find it funny, actually. He’s often told Xiao and Ganyu that they should take a page from Hu Tao’s book. Ganyu, cheekily, once asked him which page and shushu responded by saying “surprise me”.

Illustrating, quite neatly,Hu Tao’s earlier point of Xiao being the softest of their motley group, Xiao asks, “What did you want?”

“Is that a yes?”

“No.” Xiao swats Hu Tao’s hand away from his shoulder. “It’s me giving you the benefit of the doubt.”

Maybe whatever it is she wants isn’t so bad.

“Who’s your favorite?” Hu Tao asks.

“No.”

“Excluding Aether and Ganyu, obviously,” Hu Tao continues as though she’d never heard him at all. “It’s me, right?”

“Is there money riding on my answer?”

Hu Tao sticks a finger into the dimple on her cheek. “I’d split it with you.”

“You might as well just tell me the answer you want to hear to win,” Xiao says, “Otherwise we aren’t getting anywhere. I can guarantee you, you’re not going to like the answer I give you otherwise.”

“It’s either me or Chongyun. Who else could it be?”

“It could be Keqing for all you know.”

“Is it Keqing?”

“No. I don’t have favorites.”

“That’s a lie. And if it isn’t Keqing then Yun Jin’s lost.”

Xiao pauses in the middle of pulling out his wallet as they approach check out. “Why does Yun Jin think Keqing is my favorite of you lot?”

“Straight to the point, no-nonsense, blunt, and efficient. She doesn’t tease you and she sends the second least amount of texts to our group chat unless she’s the one making plans. When she makes plans she sends everything in one giant formatted text like she’s filling out some kind of official document. I think the only time she’s ever visited you up in Wangshu is when we helped you move.”

“Who’s the one sending the least amount of texts?”

“Yun Jin, but she’s catching up and it depends on what season it is,” Hu Tao replies. “Are you sure it isn’t Keqing?”

“I’m sure it isn’t Keqing.” Xiao is pretty sure that if he did say Keqing, the woman would call him just to tell him how wrong he is. Complete with a numerical list, sorted by order, of all the reasons why she can’t be the favorite and why he must be doing this in order to somehow win whatever wager is going on here.

“Just tell me who you want to hear.”

“I can’t. I have to record the entire conversation.” Hu Tao pulls out her own phone, which shows the sound recording app ongoing. “They’re keeping me honest.”

“And why are they having you be the one handling this inane conversation?” Xiao sighs, stepping forward to pay for their food. Hu Tao rattles off the most ridiculous drink order that sounds like it should be absolutely inedible. The cashier doesn’t even blink or hesitate as they key that into the machine. Xiao, upon hearing Hu Tao’s drink orders, decides to grab a bottle of water from the display case next to the register.

“Cold water? I’ll tell on you,” Hu Tao teases. “Xiao-ge is drinking ice cold water straight from a cooler. This is why you get sick.”

“See what happens if you do,” Xiao warns as he swipes his card, “Brat.”

Hu Tao snatches up the little disk with the buzzer as they make their way to a less crowded section of the cafe.

“Alright. It isn’t Keqing. No way is it Yanfei.”

“Why can’t it be Yanfei?”

“Is it Yanfei?”

“There are no favorites.” This feels like a discussion he’s had before, but he can’t place when.

“Well. Yanfei’s dating your sister. That has to be some kind of mark against her.”

“Or for her.”

“Also she’d talk your ear off given half a chance. It’s not Yanfei.”

“Has anyone told Yanfei that?”

“It isn’t Xinyan. You two aren’t close enough for her to be the favorite. Same thing for Xiangling. Wait. Well. Maybe Xiangling. You two went to the same wushu school for a while, right?”

“I didn’t exactly go to her school,” Xiao points out, “I just showed up because Shifu made me to get practice with other people who weren’t him.”

What was the point of that? Shifu could swap between martial arts styles and weapons like some people switch shoes or jackets. Xiao gained more experience fighting Shifu than going to any of those other schools.

“It’s not Xingqiu. It’s not Keqing. It’s not Yun Jin. It’s got to be me or didi.”

“I’m surprised you didn’t bet on yourself.”

“Just by asking you this question it’ll knock me down in your little mental scale of who’s annoyed you the least,” Hu Tao says. “Is it didi?”

“It’s not Chongyun. I don’t have favorites.” Ah, he remembers now. He’s fairly certain that it was Yanfei who was asking him this a few months ago.

“If I return the recording off will the answer change?”

“There’s only one way to find out, isn’t there?” Xiao replies. Hu Tao turns the recording app off. Xiao twitches his fingertips at her, beckoning her closer. She leans across the table, offering her ear to him. Xiao cups his mouth against her ear and says, “Yun Jin.”

Hu Tao slaps the table. “You’re lying. You and Yun Jin don’t even talk. You just sit there and she talks at you or shows you something on her phone or asks you to hold stuff for her. You two don’t even hang out by yourselves, one of the rest of us is always with you.”

“That’s why it’s Yun Jin,” Xiao points out. It really might have been Keqing if it weren’t for the fact that if he said Keqing she’d call him specifically to annoy him into changing his answer. Xiao’s a simple man. Of course the answer is going to be the one who annoys him the least.

“You’re certainly not her favorite.” Hu Tao sullenly starts tapping on her phone. “Damn. The only one who put money on Yun Jin was Chongyun. Wait. Was he in on this?”

“Does that matter? I don’t care if I’m anyone’s favorite. Chongyun’s a smart man. Give me the buzzer. Our food is ready.”

[wei-yiing]

Prompt: Wangxian university AU where they’re trying to revise but Wei Ying is being impossible?

Alternatively, whatever you feel like talking about right now :)

Hope your revision goes well!!!

(This is so self indulgent and i am realising my writing is very formulaic and derivative but Oh Well here u go anon!!!! and thank you so much ;-;)

"Lan Zhan, I'm bored. And hungry."

Wei Wuxian drags his hand over his face, pulling some rogue hairs from his bangs in front of his bloodshot eyes. His back aches from having been hunched over his desk for so long, and the whining of his empty stomach certainly isn't doing him any favours.

Next to him, Lan Wangji looks up from the thick textbook he had been pouring over, the pages curling up at the edges. "You can't eat in the library."

"I can if no one is looking."

"I'm looking."

"Oh, Lan Zhan." Wei Wuxian would rather put up with Lan Wangji's motherly strictness than try to study alone. His dorm room looks like a tornado has been through it, and they have a twenty-four hour library in the university, so why wouldn't he make use of it? Now that it's exam season, it's consistently occupied with frazzled, sleep deprived students, trying their best to endure the week on coffee and pure willpower.

Wei Wuxian is lucky insofar as he doesn't need to drive himself to the point of insanity attempting to understand the baffling content thrown at him; most of it, he understands after hearing it once or twice. The issue here is that he's barely attended any lectures all semester, and now, he has to teach himself three months of content in three days.

Well, at least Lan Wangji is helping him out in that regard. Lan Wangji, of course, hasn't missed a single class.

"Lan Zhan, I think I should go for a walk. Stretch the ole' leg muscles. Get some fresh air."

"You told me not to let you stop until you finish this topic."

He scoffs. "I didn't know what I was talking about. Me from a few hours ago isn't considerate of me right now."

"You made me promise." His face is expressionless, but there's a hint of exasperation behind those eyes.

"I'm giving you permission to break it. Let's walk to the cafeteria and get a coffee. Or, come with me to the stress chamber? We can lie down on the beanbags and dissociate together."

"Wei Ying..."

"Or..." Wei Wuxian puts a hand on top of Lan Wangji's, resting atop the crease of the forgotten textbook. Lan Wangji's ears are turning red already. "We can do something else altogether?"

"Wei Ying-" His voice catches in his throat. They're in a public library, after all. "Don't be so shameless."

Wei Wuxian tightens his hold on Lan Wangji's hand. "You deserve a break, don't you? Hey, you haven't given me any attention in so long. I'm going to shrivel up and disappear at this rate. I'll make a scene right here and now."

His voice drops to a flustered whisper. "Our exam is in three days."

Wei Wuxian whispers with him. "That's three whole days."

"You need to study."

"No, what I need, Lan Zhan, is you, right now."

"..." Lan Wangji stares at him, flushed and with a furrow in his brow, before pulling his hand away and turning back to put his nose in his book. It doesn't look like he's reading a word of it.

"Lan Zhan."

"..."

"Lan Wangji."

"..." His slender fingers grip the textbook harder.

Wei Wuxian sighs. Surely whatever is in that book can wait. "Lan-gege. Look at me."

That does the trick. Lan Wangji closes his eyes, then looks straight at Wei Wuxian, who just grins at him. "Forget the formulae. This library is so dull."

"... Formulae?"

"Huh? Yeah..." Wei Wuxian points to the open page spread. "The formalae from the list in the unit overview."

"..." There's a twitch at the edge of Lan Wangji's lips. "Wei Ying, the exam is open book."

"It's- it's what?" His whisper breaks into an exclamation that's just a modicum too loud by library standards. The students around them are too stressed to care, though. "It's open book?"

"Mm."

He nearly bursts into laughter. "Then what are we even worrying about? Lan Zhan, you should have said so from the start!"

"Wei Ying, you still have to-"

Wei Wuxian is slamming Lan Wangji's textbook shut before he can even finish his sentence. He grabs Lan Wangji's hand again, with a newfound ardour. "Now you really have no excuse. Come on, now. You know you can't deny me anything."

"..." Having seemingly given up, Lan Wangji makes no effort to take the textbook back, instead smiling softly to himself as he's pulled along out of the library. "Truly shameless."

They don't do any more revision that night.

[radishtears]

obedient

Post-canon; WangXian. Not for the first time, nor the last, Lan Wangji gets mad at his incorrigible husband. 

... ... ...

“Wei Ying, come here.”

Wei Wuxian stops in his tracks, smile frozen on his face. The kids facing him have also become paralyzed, gazes fixed on something over his shoulder, and he can almost see the nervous sweat breaking out on their foreheads. He turns slowly.

A tall, white-clad figure is standing there. The sight sends a shiver down Wei Wuxian’s spine.

“Lan Zhan. Haha. Um...”

“Come here.”

He goes. In fact, he runs. There’s no other choice.

When he’s within arms reach, he lifts a hand to tug on his husband’s sleeve. Lan Wangji steps back before he can make contact, stalking away without another word. His elegant Gusu Lan robes swirl gracefully around him.

Wei Wuxian knows he’s expected to follow and he does so without hesitation, struggling slightly to keep up with Lan Er-gongzi’s long strides. As he picks up his pace, he doesn’t forget to wave a frantic hand behind his back. The kids immediately scatter and scurry away.

“...bad this time...”

“...did I tell him? I told Wei-qianbei that was...”

“Shh!!”

Lan Wangji turns his head a fraction and Wei Wuxian swears that single sweep of amber eyes pierces through him like a thousand arrows. His heart skips a beat. He doesn’t know whether to swoon or cry.

...He’s so screwed.

... 

It’s quiet in the Jingshi. Wei Wuxian is seated upright and proper in front of their small tea table. His fingers betray his restlessness, the cup clutched between them spinning around and around and around…

A minute passes. And another. He takes a breath.

“Lan—“

“What did you promise me?” Lan Wangji’s words are monotonous.

“I...”

Wei Wuxian’s reply dies in his throat, drowned in a rising tide of guilt. Swallowing, he looks up but Lan Wangji shifts away the second their eyes meet. The tightness in Wei Wuxian’s chest increases. Finally, he catches sight of Lan Wangji’s clenched fists, half hidden beneath his sleeves, and he can no longer stand it.

He jumps up from his seat and wraps both his hands around one of Lan Wangji’s. This time, Lan Wangji doesn’t dodge his touch. Wei Wuxian gently, carefully, uncurls those long, slender fingers, smoothing them out until they lie straight. They rest there in the palm of his hand and, for a moment, no one moves. Then...

“I came back and you were not here.”

Wei Wuxian’s own hand trembles. He can hear hurt in Lan Wangji’s voice, a tiny wisp of a thing, but it’s enough to take his breath away. He has the sudden urge to slap himself. Instead, his fingers find and intertwine very naturally — subconsciously — with Lan Wangji’s which instinctively tighten around his.  

“I...didn’t think...” Meanwhile, Wei Wuxian’s thoughts are darting around wildly, trying to find a good enough reason. Something, anything that can make up for his actions. “But there’s no way I would’ve put the kids in real danger! And everything turned out fine, didn’t it?”

“You didn’t know that!”

Lan Wangji’s fingers disappear from between his and suddenly strong hands are clamped tightly around his arms. The two of them stand there, face to face, with Lan Wangji’s eyes fixed on Wei Wuxian’s widening ones, full of an intensity that Wei Wuxian can barely withstand.

“Why didn’t you wait for me?” Why did you leave me behind?  

He has no good enough answer. There’s nothing left for Wei Wuxian to do except throw himself into his Lan Zhan’s embrace. Lan Wangji is stiff beneath his arms. Then, all the tension drains out and Wei Wuxian feels his husband relax around him, enveloping him in the faint scent of sandalwood. When Wei Wuxian speaks, his words are muffled against Lan Wangji’s chest.

“It’s my fault. Er-gege can punish me however he wants. The Yiling Patriarch won’t dare to resist.”

“Mn.”

The deep baritone tickles against Wei Wuxian’s neck and the corner of his mouth lifts. There’s a hint of rare childishness in Lan Wangji’s voice that Wei Wuxian can detect even from that single syllable. And indeed only Wei Wuxian would be allowed to hear it. Somewhat inappropriately for the moment, a thought rises in his mind: cute!

He sighs and snuggles closer, if that’s even possible. The moment is over; they both know that. As if Lan Wangji could possibly stay mad at him — Wei Wuxian snickers quietly. Yet when he leans up for a kiss, Lan Wangji thwarts him again. Wei Wuxian blinks. He pouts.

“Lan Zhan~!”

“Your arm.”

Wei Wuxian is blindsided for a split second before realizing what Lan Wangji is talking about. It didn’t escape Lan Wangji’s sharp observational skills after all. Resigned, Wei Wuxian sticks out his left arm and even rolls up his sleeve on his own, all without further prompting.

Lan Wangji is no longer exuding that scary ice-cold aura from before but he’s still clearly unhappy as he begins taking care of the long but shallow cut. His touch is feather-light.

To be fair, the wound is very minor and is already mostly healed despite the short amount of time. Wei Wuxian sends a silent prayer for small mercies.

“Next time, you must not do this.”

Wei Wuxian nods frantically. “Whatever Lan Er-gege wants!”

Lan Wangji shoots him a sceptical look and is met with a shameless grin. He sighs. With a final tug to secure the cloth bandage, Lan Wangji leans down for that long-awaited kiss.  

... ... ...

Why was LWJ mad? Firstly, I figure this is still pretty early on in their post-canon life. My intention was: it’s not that LWJ doesn’t trust WWX’s abilities — he completely trusts WWX to be responsible and protect the kids at all costs. But this is also his worry. He knows WWX wouldn’t hesitate to sacrifice his own safety for others. And they’re just humans. They can’t predict every single thing that might happen no matter how skilled you are. Obviously, the other aspect is that LWJ is still deathly afraid of losing him, and especially that he might fail to protect him (yet again, in his view).

And why did WWX go off on his own? Well, we all know how one-track minded he can be...this little asshole...lmao... He was probably just like: hey look, now’s a perfect time. No sense in wasting this opportunity! Lan Zhan’s not back yet? Ah well, I’ll just bring him a present back. Or something.

... ... ...

#wangxianfights

buy me a ko-fi

[wifiwuxians]

okay so, siege on burial mounds, wwx hiding a-yuan in a tree: 3, 17, 28, 26, or 38

from here 

3, goodbye; 17, to distract; 26, as an apology; 28, as a lie; 38, because they’re running out of time.

-

Grabbing A-Yuan had been instinctual once the fighting had broken out- though fighting was a rather generous term. Wei Wuxian knew the Wen remnants, his new family, his people, wouldn’t stand a chance without him there, but the truth of the matter was he had the sinking feeling they wouldn’t stand a chance regardless.

They were outnumbered, ten thousand to one it felt like, and the onslaught would not stop until he was dead. Although he would fight tooth and nail to defend what he’d sworn to protect, what he’d worked so hard to build, he couldn’t allow a small child to be caught up in the battle.

If he could guarantee the survival of at least one life, he would do whatever it took.

A-Yuan fussed and struggled in his grip at first, confused as to why they were running away from home when their family was screaming and strange men were storming the mountain. Wei Wuxian merely held him tighter to his chest, covering his ears however he could, drowning out the sounds of battle with his own heartbeat. 

The air burned his lungs as he breathed, an all too familiar feeling he’d tried so hard to forget. To think Jiang Cheng had been beside him the last time his home had been set on fire, only to be the one burning it now. 

But there was no time for reminiscence or regret. He could deal with all that once he faced Jiang Cheng again. Right now, he had to find a place to hide...

Salvation came in the form of a hollowed-out tree trunk, the bark scorched and flaking off. The space was just big enough to hold a small child, and Wei Wuxian knew it was this or nothing. He could only pray the tree did not re-ignite with A-Yuan still inside.

Crouching down, he placed A-Yuan inside the tree, but found him clutching desperately to his robes once he tried to move away. Their eyes met then, A-Yuan’s sweet little round face brimming with concern.

Wei Wuxian felt himself falter, if only briefly, as he cupped the child’s face in his hands. A-Yuan brought one hand away from his robes in favor of holding his hand to his cheek.

“Xian-gege?” He asked, his tiny voice weak and quivering. 

Wei Wuxian’s heart broke then. This child knew nothing of what was happening, he understood nothing of what was to come, but he knew it was bad and he knew Wei Wuxian was trying to leave him behind. 

“Listen to me closely,” he whispered, knowing he only had minutes, perhaps seconds, “everyone is in danger, and I need to go back and help. You have to stay here where it’s safe- don’t come out until you can’t hear anything anymore. Okay? Not until everything is completely quiet.”

“I can help too!” A-Yuan quickly insisted, his hand once again flying out to clutch Wei Wuxian’s robes. “I can!”

The sound of blades clashing seemed to get closer. Wei Wuxian could not risk dragging this out, even though this was by far the most painful thing he’d ever done. Forcing a smile, he stroked A-Yuan’s cheeks and nodded.

“You can, you can help me by staying right here.” He brushed some hair away from A-Yuan’s face, making sure he was snug within the tree trunk with his eyes solely on him. “That’ll be the source of my power. With you in this tree, I can’t lose.”

A-Yuan didn’t seem convinced, and who could blame him? But Wei Wuxian was out of options. Out of options and out of time. 

“You’ll come back?” A-Yuan’s eyes filled with tears as he tried to process being left behind, left alone.

“Of course,” Wei Wuxian lied, and in that moment it was the easiest lie he’d ever told. A-Yuan stopped crying, his eyes now gleaming with a hopeful spark. “I’ll come right back to bury you with the radishes.”

A-Yuan gave a little giggle and slowly let go of Wei Wuxian’s robes, but he immediately reached for him again when he began to pull back.

“But you have to promise,” Wei Wuxian gently pried A-Yuan’s hands away, “that you’ll stay here until all the fighting stops and you can’t hear a thing. No matter how long it takes.”

It wasn’t fair. They hadn’t had enough time together; if he’d known, he would’ve spent less time teasing the little boy and more time spoiling him rotten. He would’ve told him bedtime stories every night, he would’ve carried him on his shoulders every day, he would’ve even made him his own little Chenqing to chew on.

It was absurd to be thinking such things when A-Yuan wasn’t even his own son. He couldn’t explain it, not even to himself, but the love he felt for the boy was so strong, so unconditional, that mentally calling himself his father almost felt natural- but it only made this moment hurt all the more.

Though A-Yuan was clearly scared and unsure, he wanted to help Wei Wuxian, and he believed him when he said he’d return for him. That lie was what made him agree. “I promise.”

I should’ve watched you grow up. The thought pierced Wei Wuxian’s heart as he instantly gathered A-Yuan in his arms and kissed his forehead. 

I should’ve raised you. He forced himself to place A-Yuan back inside the trunk and kissed his little hands, his cheeks, his nose. 

He never wanted to forget this child, nor did he ever want to be forgotten by him. He never wanted to forget the love A-Yuan had caused to bloom within him, amidst the rage and hatred. I should’ve done better. 

The heat was unbearable now, as were the screams ringing through the air. Wei Wuxian could only hope A-Yuan stayed true to his word as he closed his robes up tighter.

“I’ll be back,” he lied again, though he hoped against hope that it wouldn’t need to be a lie, “and we can go find you some new toys, okay?”

“I’ll wait,” A-Yuan nodded sleepily, the commotion having exhausted him. “Until everything is quiet...”

Wei Wuxian leaned forward to give A-Yuan’s forehead one last kiss. He pulled back after feeling a tiny hand to his cheek; if he stayed any longer, he’d never leave, and all would have been for nothing. 

He walked away from the ashen tree, with his broken heart buried deep in his stomach, and never returned. 

[lan-zhans]

I am... not? | HuaLian

A/N: Oh, hey! Watch me writing trash on side blog! 😀 We all need tickly content with our ships. Don't you think? No?... No? ... I hope you enjoy it!

Summary: Are Ghost Kings ticklish? Of course not! Oh, wait...

Words: 2409

Xie Lian's sweet yet nearly hysterical laughter filled up the room.

"Why are you laughing so much, Gege?" Hua Cheng's voice was teasy, swirling inside Xie Lian's ear; his cold lips brushing against the shell, causing a little squeak to break the string of laughter pouring out of him. "What's so funny?"

"San Lahahahahang!" Xie Lian arched his back off the bed in yet another failed attempt to throw Hua Cheng off him; his arms trapped between his and Hua Cheng's chest and under his lover's weight.

He could easily push San Lang off him, he really could, but those fingers mercilessly wiggling and digging playfully under his arms were making his body lose all strength as he squirmed as best as he could, trying to escape the tickling.

Hua Cheng chuckled softly. "Ah, could it be that it tickles?"

Xie Lian felt his face heating up, a deep pink blush spreading across his cheeks for laughing so much and for every teasing word whispered against his ear; tears of laughter falling from the corners of his eyes.

Xie Lian was used to this by now. Hua Cheng always found the opportunity to tickle him: in the morning, when Xie Lian just woke up and was still sleepy and weak, when he was trying to cook, when he was writing down calligraphy exercises for Hua Cheng; goodness, even during their intimate times!

Hua Cheng was always able to turn Xie Lian into a laughing mess, but even if he was used to it, it didn't mean it tickled any less, and he was so weak against it; Hua Cheng knew just which spots to touch to make Xie Lian laugh like mad and squirm under Hua Cheng's playful administration every single time.

Regardless, Xie Lian could not come to hate it, especially when Hua Cheng smiled so brightly at him, (not that he was able to see his smile too often since Xie Lian's eyes were always tightly shut as he laughed), his mischievous eye tinkling lovely and his touch, even though extremely ticklish, was soft and gentle.

He couldn't deny that it was fun... But it still tickled too much!

"Plehehehease!" Xie Lian cried out between his laughter.

"I've never done this to anyone besides His Highness before," Hua Cheng said nonchalantly, completely ignoring Xie Lian's pleas. "So I wonder if San Lang is doing a good job, Gege?"

"No no no no!" Xie Lian squeaked when Hua Cheng quickly changed spots, his nimble fingers moving up to tickle his neck. The Crown Prince's belly laughter turned into uncontrollably giggling as he scrunched up his shoulders, an adorable snort making his his nose vibrate.

Xie Lian could hear Hua Cheng's chuckles as he hummed softly. "Hmm? Is His Highness ignoring me now? I'd like some feedback, please?"

"Yes! Yehehehes!" Xie Lian shrieked out. "Good wohohohork, San Lahahahang!"

"Does Gege think so?" Hua Cheng smirked, purring his words against Xie Lian's flushed ear. "Then I think I will not stop, since His Highness is enjoying this so much."

Xie Lian shook his head, his legs kicking out in a futile attempt to escape his evil husband. "San Lang! I'm dying! I'm- ahahaha!"

Hua Cheng chuckled, "Hmm? But Gege is immortal! He can't die because of a little tickling, right?"

At some point, when Xie Lian's laughter had gone silent and he thought he was going to actually die from suffocation, the dead weight on top of him felt lighter and, with a rather weak push of his arms, he could easily (and finally), throw Hua Cheng off him. Hua Cheng fell dramatically on his back right beside Xie Lian on top of their divan, a very inexpresive 'ah' leaving his lips.

Xie Lian breathed heavily between some residual giggles. "San Lang..." He whined softly.

Hua Cheng chuckled at his side. "Hmm? What is it, Gege?"

Still a bit out of breath, Xie Lian, probably in the heat of the moment, climbed on top of Hua Cheng, straddling his waist as his hands quickly made contact with his sides, squeezing them up and down.

Hua Cheng chuckled and Xie Lian beamed at the sound, his fingers moving faster, not noticing the teasing smile pulling at the corners of Hua Cheng's mouth.

"I'm sorry, Your Highness." Only then Xie Lian looked up at his lover and his hands froze against Hua Cheng's sides. "This San Lang is not ticklish at all."

Xie Lian's eyes widened, his pink face turning red once again as he stared at Hua Cheng, mouth slightly open and surprise splashed on his features.

"..."

"..."

Xie Lian, "you are lying."

Hua Cheng laughed. "I would never lie to His Highness. This lowly one does not experience that ticklish sensation that sends Gege into hysterics, but," he said, arching one thin eyebrow, a smirk on his lips, "if His Highness is interested, he can try to find something." He smugly placed his arms behind his head like a pillow. "I don't mind being touched all over by Your Highness."

Xie Lian blushed to the tip of his ears and he wondered deep within his heart, when would it come the time when he didn't fall for Hua Cheng's teasing; at this rate... probably never.

However, still embarrassed, he narrowed his eyes. Hua Cheng smiled brightly and quite confidently when he saw that sparkling determination in Xie Lian's eyes.

The Crown Prince nodded. "I will do it," he said, pressing his legs against Hua Cheng's torso, holding him in place. "But so you know, San Lang," he smiled and Hua Cheng chuckled because he was sure Xie Lian tried to smirk, "if I do find a good spot, I will not stop until I'm satisfied."

Hua Cheng nodded, "good luck then, Gege. San Lang will take his punishment... If you success, of course."

Xie Lian was determinated, as soon as those words left Hua Cheng's mouth, he started his attack. He began with his ears, brushing gently against them and scratching behind. Nothing, so he moved down and Xie Lian didn't know whether to laugh or cry when Hua Cheng lifted his chin to expose his neck more. So nothing.

His collarbones, his chest, under his arms, ("You are lying!" "His Highness is very ticklish there, but I really am not!"), his ribs, his sides, his waist - by now the only flustered one was Xie Lian!

Hua Cheng didn't even giggle once! Not even when Xie Lian clawed his gentle fingers against Hua Cheng's tight stomach, (he was almost sure it would work, but maybe just because that's Xie Lian's weakest spot), not even a single chuckle came out of his mouth... No sound except for a teasing yawn that had Xie Lian blushing furiously.

"I told Gege I was not ticklish."

Xie Lian huffed proudly, and Hua Cheng beamed, that was the first time he saw that expression in Xie Lian's face. He was frowning a bit, his eyes slightly wide as he hungrily looked over Hua Cheng's body, trying to find another spot to attack. His pink tongue was sticking a bit between his lips and his nose was scrunched up.

He looked adorable, Hua Cheng couldn't care less about the poking and prodding around his body when Xie Lian was looking so sweet and beautiful on top of him. Honestly, he should-

"Hahahaha!" Hua Cheng's bark of laughter made the both of them freeze. "What-

Hua Cheng lifted himself up a bit to see Xie Lian's hands wrapped around his hipbones; he frowned, feeling the lingering tingling sensation right under Xie Lian's fingers. If he was able to blush, his face would be bright red by now as he saw Xie Lian's face: he was smiling widely, his eyes sparkling at his discovery.

"Did you laugh, San Lang?" He asked, pressing his thumbs into Hua Cheng's hips, making him jump. "Did that tickle?"

"It... Seems like it kind of di- ack! Your Highness, wa- ahahahaha!" Hua Cheng fell back against the divan, his back arching up and his hands reaching down to grab Xie Lian's hands.

"Hands up!" Xie Lian said and much to Hua Cheng's surprise, Ruoye came flying out, unwrapping itself from its master's arms to wrap around the Ghost King's wrists, pulling his arms up until it tied to one of the divan's legs. "I said I would not stop and you said you'd take your punishment. So now take it!"

"Your Highness!" Hua Cheng squealed. "I will keep my arms up, we... don't need Ruoye!"

Xie Lian shook his head, a bright smile pulling at the corner of his lips as he looked down to where his hands held Hua Cheng's hips. "I am going to start now. Do not pull too hard or you'll tear Ruoye up."

"Your Highness!" Hua Cheng tried again. "Your Highness, this San Lang was wrong, I didn't thought I could be- stahahap!"

His reaction was instantaneous, he bucked his hips up, almost throwing Xie Lian off him. He tried to hold his laughter in, not used to the sensation sending shiver up his spine, but as soon as Xie Lian used his thumbs to rub deep circles against his hipbones, he threw his head back, letting out clear and loud laughter that made Xie Lian laugh as well.

"G-gege! Gehehehege, wait!" He begged, trying to squirm away from the situation.

Xie Lian giggled. "No waiting, San Lang, please enjoy my revenge."

Hua Cheng shook his head as heavy laughter made his body shake as well. He hated himself for not knowing he was ticklish in the first place, but really, how could he know? No one had dared to do such thing to the Ghost King, but Xie Lian was Xie Lian and he could do whatever he wanted...

And Xie Lian was more than enjoying himself as he turned his playful lover into a mess; his eyes, beaming with excitement, looked down at Hua Cheng tenderly, his loud, unrestrained and continuous laughter (he didn't need to breath, after all), sending pleasant shivers down Xie Lian's spine. He wondered, though, if the ghosts in the Ghost City could hear their King laughing so freely and loud like this... They wouldn't dare to mention it if they did hear.

On top of that, Hua Cheng was trying to hide his face into the side of his arm and Xie Lian felt his heart flutter at the sweet sight. "San Lang... Are you flustered?"

"Your Highnehehehess!" Hua Cheng squeaked. "Dohohon't tease mehehe!"

Xie Lian laughed. "Why? San Lang always teases me, so I think-

Hua Cheng let out another loud laugh and, wanting to really hide from Xie Lian, he tried to roll on his stomach and he actually succeeded when Xie Lian lifted himself up a little bit, but as soon as he found himself with his face buried into a pillow, he knew this new position was worst since Xie Lian's fingers could easily dig into the dips of his hips, which were a very sensitive places.

"Yohohour Highnes! Have mehehehercy!" Hua Cheng pleaded, his legs kicking and his body twisting under Xie Lian as he tried not to pull his arms too harshly. "Plehehehase, stop!"

Xie Lian chuckled, "Why are you laughing so much, San Lang?"

Hua Cheng let out a groan between his laughter. "N-No, plehehehease! Don't say that!"

"This is actually my first time tickling someone. I'd like some feed back, San Lang." Xie Lian mercilessly used the same teasing words Hua Cheng used on him earlier and he enjoyed every reaction it evoked in the Ghost King.

"Gehehehege, I'm dying! Stohohohop!"

"How's that possible, San Lang?" Xie Lian asked with a faked surprised voice. "You are already dead!" Xie Lian couldn't stop laughing himself, it was fun to be on the upper hand every once in a while.

"San Lang will behave!" Hua Cheng said at once, trying to control his laughter. "I will n-nohohahahaha- I'll g-gihihive Gege a break!" He promised hurriedly, trying to look at Xie Lian through his teary eye.

Xie Lian hummed, a funny smile playing on his lips. "Really?"

"Yes! Yehehes, Gege! Plehehehase!"

Xie Lian chuckled, perhaps he tortured Hua Cheng long enough, so with a soft clearing of his throat, Ruoye came back to wrap around his arms. As soon as Hua Cheng felt his freedom, he reached down, gently grabbing Xie Lian's wrists, trying to push them away from his hips as he laughed tiredly.

Xie Lian stopped slowly until one of his hands was patting Hua Cheng's back softly, waiting for him to stop laughing and feeling a bit weird when Hua Cheng didn't breathe heavily once his laughter died down.

"Is San Lang alright?" Xie Lian asked just a bit worried, laying down beside Hua Cheng, who slowly turned on his back.

"Well, that was fun, wasn't it?" Xie Lian laughed and he let out a little squeal when Hua Cheng suddenly wrapped him between his arms, he tensed up, expecting another tickle attack, but Hua Cheng simply kissed his forehead and Xie Lian fixed Hua Cheng's eye patch once he relaxed. "Gege is really mean."

Xie Lian chuckled. "San Lang could easily throw me off, I had to keep him in place so I could take my revenge," he explained, the tip of his nose pressed against Hua Cheng's, their lips brushing with every of their words. "I kept looking back, in case E'Ming wanted to attack me."

Hua Cheng puffed. "That little shit would attack me first than Gege."

Xie Lian laughed, thinking that that was probably true.

They stayed like that for a while, staring into each other's eyes and giggling quietly at silly words and thoughts until Hua Cheng puckered his lower lip into a tiny pout, Xie Lian blushed softly. "Gege was really mean, though," he said. "I think San Lang will need a kiss so he can forgive His Highness."

Xie Lian giggled, his hands cupping Hua Cheng's perfect face. "Why, I think I also need a kiss to forgive San Lang."

Hua Cheng chuckled, bringing Xie Lian closer to him by the waist, "then let's do it at the same time, Gege~"

They kissed and kissed and kissed and giggled into each other's mouths until the moon was up and the last thing their sleepy eyes saw was their lips moving, wishing a good night, swearing their eternal love, and promising to see each other again the next morning.

[if-found-return-to-gusu]

After Christmas With A-Yuan

I want to talk about New Years but when typing it up I realized I really wanted to talk about the day after Christmas too. So I split them up into two separate posts. So I’ll start with the 26th. I went to sleep holding 2 of my favorite people but woke up tragically alone. I could tell I’d been re-tucked into bed with care. I remember the feeling of someone shifting and A-Yuan mumbling and snuggling closer. The press of a kiss against my temple? But I may have been dreaming. All I know is that I woke up alone. 

Well not entirely. As he often does, Lan Zhan had placed Suibian on the bed with me. She’s the one that woke me actually. She was snuffling up by my nose, her own twitching against mine as her fur tickled my skin.

“Mmm good morning” I mumbled at her, making her hop around quite excitedly once she realized that meant I was awake. I laughed and sat up carefully to make sure I wouldn’t squash her and beckoned her closer again.

“Do you know where my boys are?” I asked her once she was close enough to pick up. She twitched her nose at me and, of course, didn’t answer. So I told her we should go find them together. (Bunnies don’t usually like to be held from what I’ve experienced. They’ll tolerate it for a while but it makes them nervous. But Suibian never seems to mind so long as I’m the one holding her. Maybe it was because I kept picking her up as she was growing up ((Don’t wanna say when she was a baby because she still IS a baby.)) Oh… maybe she only tolerates it because she’s still so young? Oh I hope she doesn’t grow to fear it. D: I’ll have to make sure she feels extra secure because I love taking her around with me. Anyway. Tangent. You all know to expect it by now)

I swung my legs out of bed and padded out of the bedroom only to be hit by a wall of smells and the sound of kitchen stuff clinking together quietly. I closed the door as silently as I could when I heard A-Yuan giggling and what sounded like Lan Zhan  gently shushing him. I poked my head out of the hall to take a peek and found Lan Zhan was very carefully handing A-Yuan a tray of food that was clearly meant for me.  A-Yuan had almost taken it when he looked up and saw me. He yelped and shoved the tray back at Lan Zhan, who managed to keep 99% of it from spilling, and rushed at me. 

“No Xian-Gege! You’re supposed to be sleeping!!” he said, clearly frustrated that his plans had been ruined. I laughed as he started to physically turn me around and push me back to the bedroom. 

“Oh? But what if I’m not tired anymore?” I asked just to be difficult, resisting him just enough to make him put some effort. The boy went to a nearly 45 degree angle trying to shove me forward. I glanced back to smile at Lan Zhan who had set the tray to rights. He smiled back and I decided to stop teasing A-Yuan who had started to whine a little. 

“Alright! I’m going! I’m going!” I said. I heard A-Yuan telling Lan Zhan to wait a moment before he ushered me back into bed. I set Suibian down on the floor to hop where she wanted (the squirming and teasing was a bit too much excitement for even her, though she didn’t try to escape until she was a safe space from the floor. I trusted Lan Zhan would plop her back in with Bichen which he did so it worked out) and climbed into bed obediently. A-Yuan climbed on next to me so he could kiss my cheek and tuck me in before scurrying off with the order for me not to move. 

Another moment and Lan Zhan and A-Yuan were back in my line of sight, A-Yuan carefully carrying the rather over-laden tray over to me only for Lan Zhan to help place it as I sat up again.

“Good morning, Xian-Gege!” A-Yuan chirped as if he hadn’t just reprimanded me into diving back under the covers. I decided to play my role correctly, which wasn’t too hard because I was honestly feeling very warm by the exchange. 

“Oh! What’s this? Breakfast in bed??? For meeee????”

Okay the look on A-Yuan’s face told me I was over-selling it so I just grinned at him and laughed, opening my arms for a careful hug. I let him go and started to ask if the two of them were planning to join me only to find Lan Zhan had left and was now returning while holding two more trays of food. 

Not nice to flex on a 7 year old, Lan Zhan. Come on now. XD

It took a bit of maneuvering and there were a few very near calls but we managed to get all three of us in bed with the trays of steaming food over our laps. 

Blueberry pancakes and eggs and sausage (for me and A-Yuan anyway), toast and hashbrowns. Complete with orange juice and a glass of water. Entirely too much food that was absolutely completely consumed to the last crumb. 

It was… it was so domestic and.. Warm and… My chest aches with it even now. I want that. I want that forever. It felt like the three of us were a real family! And.. and after what A-Yuan said at his birthday party… Okay that’s for later. We’re doing this in order!

As we worked through the mountain of food I suddenly realized-- When had Lan Zhan gotten a third tray? It was possible that he’d had it but only ever pulled out 2 before but this one didn’t match the others. The tray that was given to A-Yuan was a bit smaller (which was good because we were PUSHIN it with the trays on the bed) and covered in little bunny prints. I tapped on A-Yuan’s tray and asked Lan Zhan when he’d bought it. He replied that he had picked it up this morning since he was out anyway. 

“You… went out already? And came back? And cooked breakfast???” I asked, somehow still surprised even though I KNOW very well by now that he wakes up at the ass crack of dawn. 

He just nodded and smiled at me. “I had to get a few things and I didn’t want to disturb you two.”

I flopped back on the bed with a whine, rambling about how they were spoiling me so rotten and how we should be pampering HIM instead because he’s already gotten so much done that morning and must be tired and blah blah blah. I don’t listen to myself most of the time so I can’t tell you all what I said but you get the jist. 

Lan Zhan smiled. I mean. I know he did even though my arm was dramatically over my eyes. I could feel it in his ‘mn.’ 

“Don’t laugh at meeeeee,” I whined which just made him more amused. A-Yuan patted my knee consolingly and told me I should finish eating before my pancakes got soggy. 

A brilliant lad. Top of his class. Couldn’t be prouder if he was my own son. 

Ahhh dreams. 

Gotta work on one dream at a time. Not gonna compound it right now. 

Once we had finished our feast, I insisted on carrying the trays back to the kitchen and cleaning up since they’d gone through all the work making and delivering breakfast. Lan Zhan got a… complicated look on his face at that and I know where his mind was going. I softened and gave him what I hoped was a reassuring smile. I hadn’t forgotten our talk from the other day. I wasn’t going to go overboard.  He seemed to understand because he relaxed and nodded at me. 

I only did a basic clean up for the time being, promising to take care of the rest of it later. I think that reassured him further. 

Not gonna lie, part of me really really wanted to reach for the bottle of cleaner again. My fingers twitched a bit but I resisted. I left a bit of mess and went to sit with my boys in the living room. 

Knowing and doing are two different things. And that was admittedly harder than it should have been. But the way Lan Zhan looked at me…. Suddenly it was the easiest thing in the world. 

The three of us digested while watching something ‘family oriented’ on TV which just gave me MORE feels to be shelved for now. It ended up with Lan Zhan shuffling closer to me while A-Yuan somehow draped himself across both our laps. I saw Lan Zhan stroking A-Yuan’s hair out of the corner of my eye and it just melted my heart further. 

After a couple episodes of… whatever we were watching (A-Yuan apparently had been watching this for a while and wanted to keep going so we indulged him. But I have NO idea what the hell it was)

The moment… it was honestly perfect. It had even started to snow outside. I could see the big fat flakes floating lazily down to earth from the large window. I don’t know what we were watching but it wasn’t too obnoxious. I felt Lan Zhan slide his arm around me as he kept petting A-Yuan. The two of them looked about as content as I was. Warm and close and comfortable. 

I.. I really want that moment to be my life. That forever. That is paradise. 

But then, as all good things are wont to do, the moment ended. But it wasn’t a sad ending. It was a new beginning. 

A-Yuan had shifted after his show had ended and looked up at Lan Zhan, asking if it was time yet. I had no idea what he was talking about but Lan Zhan seemed to consider. He looked at his watch, then nodded with a hum. Apparently this was the correct response because A-Yuan whooped and basically just RAN to the kitchen. 

I looked at Lan Zhan, completely confused, but instead of answering my silent question he just smiled and offered his hand to me. Never one to miss THAT opportunity, I took that offered hand and let him lead me to the kitchen where A-Yuan was pulling out… cookie cutters?

“We have to make the batter, first,” he reminded A-Yuan, making the boy pout a bit. “But you can mix the dough” was enough to get him back into his chipper spirits. 

“Batter…?? Are we making.. Christmas cookies? A bit late for that, isn’t it?”

“Never too late!!” A-Yuan protested. And who am I to argue against that?

“There was a rather good sale on the cutters when I was out so I thought perhaps A-Yuan would enjoy it.”

“You thought right!” A-Yuan chirped happily before asking what ingredients we needed. 

I helped gather the ingredients. Various white powders, eggs, butter, vanilla and so on. With my hands in the rather sorry state they were still in I let them handle putting everything together and mixing it up (safer that way anyway. Even with this, part of me wanted to add a bit of spice to the mix. Sweet and spicy go well together! And I think it’d make an interesting cookie! Maybe I’ll try that on my own some time) but I got to roll it out for cutting. 

And then I discovered that when Lan Zhan saw there was a sale on cookie cutters he had apparently decided to buy one of each. There were tons! Even some repeats because of buying some bulk packages of them as well. But that’s okay! Can never have too many snowmen!

Cutting out the shapes was so much fun! We let A-Yuan pick out most of them but even so. I stepped back and let Lan Zhan put them in the oven though. I’m.. getting better but hot stuff still makes me nervous sometimes. 

Actually it’s really frustrating! It wasn’t even the kitchen where the explosion happened! It was my bed area. They’d intended to get me in my sleep. It really really was only luck that my explosion went off after a delay. It was probably supposed to go off at the same time as the other one and if it had…

I think Lan Zhan noticed my thoughts starting to spiral again because suddenly he was in front of me. He brushed my cheek with his thumb, either wiping off some flour or putting some on. He gently guided me to look at him and smiled even more softly at me. “I’m here,” he said, his voice low and careful. I smiled back and covered his hand with mine. 

“Are you okay, Xian-Gege?” asked my suddenly acquired new ankle weight. I must have looked quite bad because apparently A-Yuan noticed too and latched himself to my leg. He doesn’t do that as much as he used to when he was little (though being with A-Ling seems to bring that out in him again). I reached down to pat his head and smile at him too. 

“I’m fine,” I promised to him, then again to Lan Zhan when I saw him still looking at me. “I promise.”

And I was. The moment had passed as quickly as it had come and suddenly I found I really was okay. I hugged them both and thanked them before asking what we wanted to do while the first batch cooked. 

Lan Zhan pointed out they would only be in the oven for a few minutes which surprised me. I always forget how fast they cook. Blame it on making them SO rarely. And that I don’t cook may be another factor. Hah. Ah well. 

We stood around and chatted while we waited and before I knew it the timer dinged and Lan Zhan was switching them out for the next batch.  I don’t know if A-Yuan or me was more impatient for those cookies to cool, but Lan Zhan said that the frosting would just melt off if we didn’t wait for them to be at least room temperature. 

I pointed out that maybe I wanted a melty snowman he didn’t know. But he gave me a look so I sat on the bar-stool I’d pulled up and pouted sulkily.  A-yuan climbed up onto his own stool and sulked with me.  Lan Zhan was pointedly NOT looking at us which made it really hard to  hold the pout for wanting to giggle instead. A-Yuan and I shared a look and we both almost broke, but I managed to just re-exaggerate my pout and he copied my expression. 

I had just started to implement an old, tried and true method of mine of making a quiet whine noise that very slowly increases in volume when Lan Zhan finally declared that we could decorate them now. With many whoops and hoorays A-Yuan and I set to our task (A-Yuan still on his stool so he could have easier access to the counter. He’s already 7 but still a bit small for his age if I’m honest.) 

The two of us decorated our little hearts out while Lan Zhan stayed in charge of swapping out the cookies in the oven. Eventually, though, he ran out of cookies to cook so I tried my luck at getting him to join us in the decorating. 

He seemed rather reluctant but I’m nothing if not persistent. “Come oooooon, please? I wanna eat a cookie that Lan Zhan made!!” 

I think that’s what finally convinced him. I’ve noticed, and I do TRY not to take advantage of this too often, but… well he never denies me anything. Like… ever. Not unless he has a really really good reason.  I don’t know if it’s because I’m really good at pouting or if he really just loves to spoil me that much? Maybe both? I mean…. Okay I’m… Since New Years especially I’ve been re-framing how I look at our relationship. And how he reacts to me and how we interact with each other.

I know I know. About time? Look, you can’t blame me for being careful. Okay? Just… ugh. Anyway….

Maybe it’s rose-tinted glasses. Maybe I’m reading way too far into things. Maybe I’m just wrong. But I hope… I hope I’m right. I hope that what I’m seeing is true. I hope…

But we’ll get into that later. 

Lan Zhan helped decorate the rest of the cookies and it went…. About as well as his decorating back at the corn maze had. Bless his talented heart but arts and crafts are definitely a weakness for him.  A weakness that is now snuggly coupled with his shit aim in my heart. The two ‘flaws’ that he has and they just endear him to me even more. How is that fair? Somehow him being bad at things just makes him even MORE perfect? That’s just not fair! 

A-Yuan and I laughed at a particularly hideous angel cookie, but when A-Yuan asked if that angel was supposed to be ME I think we both died a little. (Lan Zhan did not confirm nor deny the identity of the angel cookie but at a glance it did seem to share my morning bed-head hair. And he gave it clothes that were rather dark and tattered as is my preference. But that could just be chalked up to lack of finesse with the piping. The grey sprinkles for eyes did add a bit of suspicion though.)  I mentioned if it was supposed to be me they’d better snap off the wings which made Lan Zhan scowl at me and hold the cookie rather protectively.  I laughed and promised I wouldn’t destroy his hard work and he reluctantly relaxed and went back to his careful decorating. 

Sooner than I would have liked we ran out of cookies to decorate. Though I’m not sure where we’d put them if we had any more. They covered every flat surface in the kitchen while the frosting settled and dried. “Which ones do you want to take home?” Lan Zhan said after a while of gazing fondly at our kingdom of sugar soldiers. That… kinda made my heart sink. Right. Home. A-Yuan was gonna have to go back home. Which was not with us. Wen Ning was going to be picking him up soon.

Should I be concerned with how fast I got used to it? The three of us together in the play-acting of a little family? Probably. 

A-Yuan hopped around the kitchen and considered carefully, picking out some of his favorites to give to the rest of the Wens. He asked me to give a sparkling snowflake to A-Ling which just made me melt. 

Eventually we got all his selections all packed up in tupperware and ready to be taken away. But he came up to me with one last cookie in his hand. It was a christmas tree he’d spent so long carefully decorating. And honestly it was a masterpiece considering he’s all of 7 years old. He’d done his best to color in the star at the top with gold frosting and the branches with green. He’d placed strings of dot sprinkles in alternating colors as garland and shaped sprinkles for the ornaments. He’d even tried to put lines in the frosting at the bottom to make it look like tree bark, though that had melted together into a bit of an un-even lump. But still.  

“I made this one for you, Xian-Gege,” he said with the brightest smile. He said that he was scared when he found out I was hurt but he was so glad that I was okay. He was saying something else but I cut him off when I hugged him so tight, careful not to crumble that precious cookie. 

I still have it. I couldn’t bring myself to eat it. Eventually Lan Zhan and I sprayed it with stuff (per instructions seen on the internet) so that we could preserve it and keep it forever. I turned it into an ornament for a christmas tree. I wonder if we can have A-Yuan over next year. I wonder if he’d notice it. 

I was… a bit emotional up until Wen Ning finally showed up to collect his nephew. There was another round of hugs where I told A-Yuan how much I love him and how proud of him I was and then he was gone. 

And it was just me and Lan Zhan. 

I sniffled a little and Lan Zhan carefully took my hand to comfort me. I smiled a watery smile at him before we both went about cleaning up. We nibbled on some of the more unfortunate looking cookies  (which honestly weren’t ALL Lan Zhan’s since I had some failed experiments of my own to add to the ‘reject’ pile) and soon the kitchen was properly spotless. But it still smelled like the cookies, the scent of sugar and vanilla mixing with the sandalwood that usually dominated the home in a mix that was surprisingly pleasant. 

Once we’d finished cleaning up, Lan Zhan took my hand again and led me to the living room to sit down. “Wait here a moment,” he said. He went off to the other room to get something. I listened to the soft sound of his footsteps and the rustling of paper. He sat next to me again and asked me for my hands. I offered them to him with a questioning stare that he ignored in favor of undoing the wrappings I’d put on earlier to help protect them while we made the cookies. 

One at a time he slowly unwound the length of thin cloth until my poor raw knuckles were exposed. 

I asked him what he was doing, but he only responded by pulling out a bottle of something. It was apparently some sort of ointment or lotion. Something soothing. He poured some into his own palm, rubbing his hands together to warm it up before he gently, oh so gently started to rub it into the skin on my hands. I stung for a moment, though he soothed it quickly by blowing on my hands with care. But after the initial contact the sting faded. It smelled so nice. A bit medicinal but definitely sandalwood. 

Apparently that’s what he’d gone out for. That ointment/lotion/whatever it is. He’d seen how tender my hands were (of course he had) and wanted to give them extra care. He’d apparently had to go across town just to get it. The post-christmas shoppers were already out in full swing gobbling up sales and crowding the streets. 

I… he hates crowds. When we shop we specifically try to go out when there are less people when we can manage it. And dealing with post-holiday crowds. I know for a fact that he’s done his best to avoid that his whole life. And going all the way into town just to get me some hand cream. Just. 

My heart.

I can’t handle it.

Even after the cream had been rubbed in with so much care, he kept holding my hands. Rubbing and massaging the parts where the skin was intact and a little up my wrists. 

Eventually he stopped but I held his hands before he could pull them away so that I could place a kiss in thanks on his knuckles. When I looked up again he was staring at me. So close. So soft. So…. 

I pulled back with a cough that probably did nothing to hide my flaming cheeks and he let me. Was it wishful thinking that made me think I saw a flash of disappointment in his eyes? 

I thanked him for always taking such good care of me. He told me there was no need for thanks between us. 

I smiled at him again and he smiled back. He smiles so much easier now than he used to. At least when it’s just us.  

Does that mean that it’s because of me? Am I helping him smile? I hope so.

[gongju-juice]

She never lied.

This was requested by anonymous. For future reference, please follow my page and send a message for requests. I may not be able to get everyone, and I may not give you exactly what you want but please be patient and understanding mah bois.

Warnings: Psychological Instability, Angst

“Mr. Park, how are you feeling today?”

He cleared his throat, eyes shifting around the white walls of the office. Every time he visited, the same family photos and certificates hung mockingly on the wall. Once upon a time, Jinyoung was once successful. He had his degrees, his career, his woman; his heart. Those days belong in another part of his life. A life that no longer existed.

“Mr. Park?”

“I feel. . .” he paused to find the right words, “hollow. Not as empty as usual, but the hole is wider today. It burns around the edges.”

The psychiatrist lowered her head in disappointment. Ms. Kyeong-un was one of the most talented mental health physicians in Changwon City. Her accomplishments were renowned and praised in all of South Korea. But with all her fancy background and text-book knowledge, she simply couldn’t understand the complex young man. 

“Have you been doing your therapy sessions like we’ve talked about?”

“No,” he admitted, “well, yes, at first. My medicine makes my head feel weird, and every time I try to breathe like you showed me how, all I inhale is her perfume. When I go out for walks, I see the pretty cherry blossoms—cherry blossoms were her favorite, you know.”

“Do you still work at the elementary school?”

Jinyoung recalled the prior day’s events. He was supposed to take the kindergarteners out for recess on the playground. But instead of doing that, he led them to the parking lot where cars maneuvered in and out of the blue lined spaces, tires screeching on the hot asphalt. Children yelling as they came inches from death by the silver bumper of a car’s front.

“No, I was fired.”

“Fired? But why?”

He scratched his chin. “I don’t know why. I was just trying to let them have fun.”

She closed her folder and clasped her hands together. “Mr. Park, I don’t see any improvement in our sessions at all. Your progression has been stagnant for months. It’s time you take initiative.”

Jinyoung didn’t see what else he could do. Sleepless nights led to terrifying hallucinations in the morning. Those hallucinations made him do terrible things in the day. How was he supposed to know that the friendly bunny standing in the parking lot of the school was not real?

“I have an idea,” she announced. “Admittedly, it is a little unconventional and slightly discouraged, but I think it may help your case. Would you like to know what it is?”

He shrugged. She reached under her desk and pulled out a thin, iridescent card.

“I have a friend named Lee Taemin. He takes on special orders at this location. Just tell security your name, and they’ll lead you there. I sent a picture of her so he’d know what she looked like when she was. . .alive.”

“A doll?” Jinyoung chuckled mirthlessly. “And you think one of those things can help me get over my wife? The life, the sunshine of my entire existence?”

“It’s worth a try, Mr. Park.”

Sometimes, Jinyoung seriously wondered about the insanity behind people’s motives. He was crazy. He knew this and knew it well. But this woman, this doctor, was supposed to fix the cloud of despair that was his mentality. And she thought she could accomplish this by a figurine made of plastic and synthetic human flesh. Who was crazier?

The next night he arrived at the building. It was made entirely of glass, a tree in the metaphorical urban jungle that dominated first-world society. Above the gold embellished revolving doors, the name of the owner shimmered in the morning sun.

He told the clerk his name, and she brought him into an elevator and up to the top floor. The long hallway had a clear view of the city, sprawling alive and awake in the rush hour time. All of it was meaningless. None of it meant a thing if he couldn’t have his girl. He used to dream of exploring the whole world. Now he sat on his bed staring at the tv blankly. Nothing had color any more.

“Mr. Park,” Taemin called, swiveling around in his chair. He wore a dark suit, his hair neatly parted to the side and meticulously groomed. “Kyeong-un told me all about your dilemmas.”

“And you’re wasting your time. Nothing or no one could ever replace my Mina. I don’t even know why,” he sighed. “I don’t even know why I’m here.”

“You’re here because you want a chance. You want a chance to get rid of the pain that’s been eating away at your heart. Don’t feel bad, Mr. Park. Everyone has their mediums. Whether it be drugs or alcohol—crime or sex—you’re allowed to do whatever is you have to do.”

He pointed at the box by his desk. “Take a look inside. I won’t judge you.”

Jinyoung as he was told. A cold, robotic body with her signature long black hair and glassy brown eyes laid inside. She was even the exact height, the shape of her lips and arch of her brows all a perfect replica of the woman who used to be.

“Do enjoy,” Taemin said. And with that, Jinyoung left the building.

He set the doll down on his bed. For as much as it resembled her, he knew her eyes were not animated. Her breath, her painted smile was fake. The real Mina was six feet underneath the dirt.

Sometime, maybe it was a week or two. Jinyoung revisited the forgotten doll abandoned in her cardboard prison. He lifted her body, cradling her to his chest. 

“My girl! My darling, baby girl! How could I leave you all alone when you’ve been so cold, so lonely? I won’t ever do it again, I swear it!”

His angel was back. His life was back. 

In the mornings, he bathed her in exquisite perfumes, brushing her hair delicately with care to the nurture of every single strand. He made her tea, and together, they drank in the golden rays of the sun.

The thing is—he wasn’t crazy. He wasn’t crazy. When he held her in his arms, she was real. She was smiling, she talked to him, she held his hand. Mina was alive, she wasn’t a doll. And Mina wouldn’t lie to him. She never lied to him. How could she lie about being real?

Got7 is one of my favorite Kpop groups, and Jinyoung and Jaebum are both my bias wreckers lol. (Jackson gege is my precious bias tho). 

This is a slightly altered form for what they requested, but that’s just because their idea was very grand, and I was little worried about cramming half-done work in this one-shot. I’m also not sure if I will write smut for actual (real-life) people in the future. For fictional characters it’s cowabunga and all that, but I haven’t made up my mind about actual people.

[poetatertot]

It’s Not So Bad (In LA): part two

“So.” Wei Wuxian perches on the couch arm. “The summer camp seems to be working out.”

They’ve ordered a pizza for dinner—the sweet luxury of pay day. Jin Ling has sauce all over his chin, and greasy cheese fingers. Jiang Cheng watches him rip two pepperonis off the top and stack them in his mouth. 

“Yeah.” He sips his water. “You really like it, don’t you a-Ling?”

His nephew grunts through his mouthful. “It’s alright. Coach Xichen is too nice, though.”

Wei Wuxian lifts an eyebrow. “Too nice? How can someone be too nice?”

Jin Ling shrugs one shoulder. “He smiles so much. He makes us all share. He listens to all of Lan Jingyi’s stupid stories, even though he tells the same ones ove and over.” He scowls. “Lan Jingyi is stupid.”

Jiang Cheng snorts. “Big words coming from you.”

“What does that mean?”

Wei Wuxian cackles. “Uncle thinks you’re a clown!”

Jin Ling’s face screws up around his food. “But didn’t Wei-gege say Uncle was a fat—”

Wei Wuxian lunges across the table and slaps one hand over Jin Ling’s greasy mouth. 

Jiang Cheng swallows his crust. “No, go on, a-Ling. Tell me.”

Jin Ling’s eyes flick between them. “Um.. He scoots back his chair. “I have to pee!” He runs down the hall and slams the door behind him.

Jiang Cheng glares. “What bullshit are you telling my nephew?”

“Ah-ah, our nephew, a-Cheng!” Wei Wuxian ducks under Jiang Cheng’s swing. “He just needs to know the truth is all!”

“I’ll show you truth, you big, mangy—” 

They tussle, pulling hair and knocking plates until Jin Ling returns and squabbles at them for fighting. 

The next morning, Jiang Cheng wakes early enough to catch Wei Wuxian in the kitchen. Coffee brews from their old Kitchenaid, filling the living room with cheap-bean-smell. Jiang Cheng wrinkles his nose.

“I’m taking a-Ling to camp.”

Wei Wuxian peeks up from under his bangs. “Oh? Have something to do afterwards?” He frowns. “I thought it was my turn to get groceries.”

“It is.” Jiang Cheng fiddles with the peeling edge of the countertop. “I’m going to just drop him off and come back before work.”

They stand in silence for a moment. The Kitchenaid beeps feebly and turns off. 

A warm flush threatens to betray Jiang Cheng’s composure. He turns away, pinching at the behavior update Jin Ling came home with—a whole page of pen-written characters, signed at the bottom with elegant flourish. 

Lan Xichen.

“If you say so,” Wei Wuxian sing-songs. “Should I get those loquats you like while I’m out, then?”

Jiang Cheng thumbs over the signature. “I don’t care. You’re the one that likes them, remember?”

“Hmm.” 

He looks up. Wei Wuxian smiles back at him from the kitchenette, dark eyes bright. 

“What?” Jiang Cheng demands.

“Nothing,” Wei Wuxian says, but he grins into his mug as he lies, and Jiang Cheng knows he’s been caught. “Shall I pick him up this evening, then? Before groceries?”

The idea of Wei Wuxian laying eyes on Lan Xichen makes Jiang Cheng want to hide in the closest dumpster. Or move back to San Francisco. Or both. 

But he can’t be irrational. He has work; Wei Wuxian knows this.

“Do what you want,” he mutters, and lets the report fall from his fingers.

When they pull up to the Y—Jiang Cheng parks Zidian in the right spot this time—there aren’t too many kids. In fact, they’re a whole half-hour early. 

Jiang Cheng likes to think this is a coincidence. 

“Come on, a-Ling.” He pats his nephew’s leg. “Unbuckle. We’re here.”

Mianmian—because Jiang Cheng still hasn’t figured out her real name and doesn’t want to ask—sits at the front desk again. She looks up and actually beams at the sight of them.

“On time for Day 2!” She waves her pen. “That’s the spirit!”

“Er, yeah.” Jiang Cheng shoves Jin Ling in front. “Where’s today’s meetup for the 8-12’s?”

“Second door on the right.” Mianmian checks her monitor. “Looks like today is Morning Craft-Making! Have fun a-Ling!”

Jin Ling flushes an impressive shade of pink. “Thanks.”

The room in question is like a clown-house: bright tiles, walls covered in handprints, art tacked on every available surface. The smell of glue and paint hangs like nostalgic cloud; Jiang Cheng inhales deep and instantly is flung back to fifth grade when he painted purple dragons the whole year. They still have a few of them stored away. Somewhere. 

Lan Xichen pokes his head out of a cabinet. “Oh! You’re early today.”

“Yes, Coach.” Jin Ling throws his backpack into a chair. “Uncle said we had to.”

Jiang Cheng flushes. “I, ah. I have work.”

Lan Xichen nods—and then he steps out fully from behind the cabinets and Jiang Cheng has to close his eyes for a moment. Nobody should look that good in an apron and sweatshirt. He even has the sleeves pushed up, baring muscular forearms, showcasing elegant fingers and a cute little friendship bracelet.

Jiang Cheng’s palms are starting to sweat. He crams his hands in his pockets.

“Well,” he forces out, “a-Ling. Are we going to have another good day?”

“Yes Uncle,” Jin Ling drones. He wrinkles his nose. “As long as Lan Jingyi isn’t here.”

“Now, now.” Lan Xichen puts his hands on his hips. How did Jiang Cheng never notice how nice his hips were? “Is that any way to talk about our family?”

And it’s stupid. Our family is decidedly not Jiang Cheng’s family. He knows this, so why is his face getting red anyway?

Jin Ling peers up at him. “Uncle, you’re all sweaty.”

Oh my god. Okay. It’s definitely time to go.

“I’ll just be.. Leaving.” He points towards the door. “Um. Have a good day, Jin Ling. Lan Xichen.”

Lan Xichen smiles with all of his perfect teeth. A dimple pops on one side. “Certainly,” he says. “You too.”

Jiang Cheng is totally a goner.

He floats on that smile all day. Nothing can bring him down. Not when Zidian fakes her own death on the I-5 freeway. Not when AAA informs him there’s a waiting time of over an hour. Not when he arrives to work late, and then has to spend extra time cleaning all the bathrooms by himself. 

He has a dimple, Jiang Cheng thinks to himself. Oh god. He has a dimple.

He nearly drops his rag into the toilet.

Jiang Cheng floats on Cloud Nine all the way until he pulls into his shitty parking space and trudges up two flights to the apartment.

The living room light is on.

“Wei Wuxian?” He locks the door, toeing off his sneakers. “What are you doing awake?”

His adoptive brother should be asleep by now. Not that he follows a schedule—even with work, Wei Wuxian’s proclivities for late-night reality TV is well-documented—but it’s a Tuesday night, and Wei Wuxian usually opens Wednesdays and Fridays.

Wei Wuxian looks up from the table. “Oh, hey. Just..” He waves a hand. “Making a playlist.”

“At midnight? Don’t you have work tomorrow?”

His brother blows a raspberry. “It’s for somebody. I wouldn’t expect you to understand. Don’t you have, like, two friends?”

Jiang Cheng has one. It’s his brother. “So? Can’t you make that in the morning?”

“But I told Lan Zhan I’d have it done tomorrow.” Wei Wuxian sighs, twirling a lock of hair around one finger. 

There’s leftover pizza in the fridge. Jiang Cheng doesn’t even bother with a plate. “Lan Zhan?” 

Wei Wuxian has the audacity to blush. 

“Don’t worry about it,” he mutters, which means Jiang Cheng should absolutely worry about it. But then: “Here’s Ling-er’s report from today.”

Jiang Cheng swoops to snatch it from his fingers. All smiley-faces again. Whatever black magic Lan Xichen has at his disposal, he’s doing some serious legwork with it. Jin Ling never gets along well with other kids.

Another wonderful day, he’s written at the bottom. How lucky for Jin Ling to have such a good role model! There’s a little waving stickman next to his name.

“So,” Wei Wuxian says. “Coach Lan Xichen, huh?”

Jiang Cheng gives him a look over the paper that would kill small birds. “Don’t.”

“What? I didn’t even say anything!”

“Yeah. Yet.”

“You’re such a sourpuss,” Wei Wuxian complains. “No wonder you never get any dates. Your aura repels people from a mile away.”

“What does this have to do with getting dates?” Jiang Cheng can see the gears turning in Wei Wuxian’s brain—no, they’ve already been turning. He just happened to walk in right at the end. “Wei Wuxian—”

“Jiang Cheng,” his brother mimics. “I think it’s time we try again.”

“‘We?’ There is no we in this! And I’m not going on any dates!” He crinkles the paper in his irritation and pauses to smooth it out again. “You’re delusional.”

“And you have a crush on the hot YMCA supervisor,” Wei Wuxian sing-songs. 

“Do not!”

“Do too.” Wei Wuxian leans in, eyebrows waggling. “Come on. I would too, if I were you. Thank goodness I’m not, though—you’re bound to get premature grey hairs.”

Jiang Cheng’s eye twitches. “Do. Not. Meddle.”

“So you admit there’s something to meddle with?”

“Don’t you have a playlist to make?”

Wei Wuxian rolls his eyes. “I’m almost done! Don’t change the subject.” He leans in. “Picture this: you. Mr. Hunky Coach Man. On a date.” He pauses, considering. “A good date.”

“I don’t want to picture anything,” Jiang Cheng says. It’s a lie. He’s already picturing them on their second date. And their third. And when they adopt a dog together after he moves in.

“Uh-huh.” Wei Wuxian wags a finger. “I know you. If I don’t help out, you’ll be a sad, lonely hermit for the rest of your life! Come on, a-Cheng. When was the last time you went on a date? A year ago? Two years ago?”

Jiang Cheng knows when it was. A cold rush of something bitter seethes below his skin, poisoning his already-failing mood. He drops his pizza on the table. He’s not hungry anymore.

“Try five,” he snaps. “Some of us have bigger problems, you inconsiderate twat.”

He sees Wei Wuxian do the math. The way his eyebrows raise, and then fall. His lips part in a silent o, but for once, he has nothing to say. Jiang Cheng wishes he could call it a victory.

“I..” Wei Wuxian swallows. “I didn’t—”

“No, you didn’t,” Jiang Cheng snaps. “It’s all just a big, fucking game to you, is that it? My life isn’t one of your TV shows! At least one of us has to take care of Jin Ling, and if it has to be me then I’m fine with it. I don’t need you giving me shit while you’re off making playlists for random pieces of ass!”

“Lan Zhan is not a piece of ass!” Wei Wuxian snaps. He stands, lips twisting. “Just because one of us knows when to move on—”

“Move on? Move on?” Jiang Cheng lunges over the table and shakes him. “How can you fucking say that? Are you listening to yourself?” He sucks in a sharp breath and lets go. “Forget it. I’m going to bed.”

“Jiang Cheng, wait—”

He slams his bedroom door.

The next morning is rough. Jiang Cheng hardly slept. His eyes feel like someone’s kicked a whole sandbox into them. His body aches more than when Jin Ling accidentally gave him the flu. He almost wishes he were sick. Maybe then he wouldn’t have to leave his bedroom ever again.

But no. It’s a Wednesday, so there’s still a-Ling’s summer camp to go to.

“Uncle, you look bad,” his nephew tells him plaintively. 

Jiang Cheng squints over his cup of coffee. Jin Ling blinks up from his bowl of Cheerio’s, the picture of seven-year-old innocence. 

“Thanks,” he deadpans.

At least Wei Wuxian already went to work. There’s no morning awkwardness to deal with, no avoidance tactics Jiang Cheng has to employ. It’s just him and his nephew, alone in the apartment at 8AM. 

Jiang Cheng looks at Jin Ling—really looks at him. He’s grown a ton over the past year, shooting out of all of his pants. His hair is getting a little long; Wei Wuxian will have to give him a trim soon. 

Every day he looks more and more like his mother.

Jiang Cheng wonders what Jiejie would think if she could see him today. Would she be happy with the way they’ve raised her son? Would she scorn them for living like this? What would she do in this situation?

A-Cheng. I know you’re not good with words, but you have to apologize.

For what? I didn’t do anything wrong!

Maybe not. But isn’t it best to mend the bridge before it breaks?

His fingers curl tighter around his coffee mug. 

“Come on, a-Ling,” he says. “It’s time to get dressed for camp.”

☁️

It’s Pool Day. 

It’s Pool Day and nobody warned Jiang Cheng about it being Pool Day, because what happens on Pool Day but the most beautiful man on Earth walking around in tight swim trunks and a tank-top? With sunglasses? 

His long hair is twisted into a messy bun. His arms are defined enough to make a sculptor weep. And his collarbones— 

Jiang Cheng likes to think he isn’t a weak man, but sometimes? There are exceptions.

“Coach!” Jin Ling shrieks. “Look at my swim trunks!” 

They’re bright yellow with little elephants. Lan Xichen beams.

“They suit you,” he says. “Very bright. Just like you!”

Jin Ling smiles wide enough to practically close his eyes. He tosses his backpack aside and immediately makes for the group of kids in the warm-up zone. In a moment, he’s merged into their group entirely.

It makes Jiang Cheng proud. He doesn’t know what Lan Xichen’s done to improve his nephew’s behavior, but it makes Jiang Cheng hopeful for second grade. He wants Jin Ling to grow up surrounded by love, by friends and affection. Seeing him do warm-up stretches with the other kids gives Jiang Cheng light.

Lan Xichen turns the loveliest shade of pink when Jiang Cheng tells him this. He even blushes all the way down his chest. Jiang Cheng is utterly delighted.

“I’m just doing my best,” Lan Xichen says. His honesty warms Jiang Cheng all the way to his toes. “I want them to feel like they’re really part of a family.”

“Yeah,” Jiang Cheng breathes. He follows Lan Xichen’s gaze to the group of laughing, smiling children. “I know what you mean.”