#what kind of student levi could have been

[sterpernie]

Probably no one will read this, but I hope someone will. To my fellow Americans, it is absolutely fair to cut people off for beliefs you disagree with and may one day lead to you suffering harm, but if you have someone you love with these beliefs that you are thinking about cutting out of your life, please consider a few things first.

1. We are living in echo chambers, repeating our beliefs back at us. If we don't interact with people who believe differently, how are they ever going to hear a different perspective that is not completely twisted by the media they consume?

2. They often don't understand what they are asking for. There is a sizeable minority (1/3 of Americans per the NYT) that do not know Obamacare and the Affordable Care Act (ACA) are the same thing. They want to repeal Obamacare but keep the ACA. People want tariffs not realizing that they aren't the same as sanctions. They don't realize that China is not going to be paying the tariffs, they will. China is not going to eat the costs of the taxes (tariffs) levied against them for exporting to the US, China will just raise the prices of their goods and probably levy tariffs against US exports to China in retaliation like they did during Trump's last term, resulting in everything getting more expensive. It it pretty striking to look at the education demographics of who voted what party.

3. They don't get the whole story. There was an immigration bill that would give the Republicans basically everything they wanted in regard to the border. Trump killed it because he wanted immigration to remain an issue for him to run on. My dad, who listens exclusively to right wing media, heard nothing about it. He was shocked it didn't pass when he was told. When he hears about Palestinians, he only hears about them referred to as terrorists and Hamas, attacking Israel unprovoked. He has never heard about the Nakbas or about how terrible the conditions were in Gaza even prior to October 7th.

4. A scary amount of Americans have no damn clue how the US government works. They think, abortion protections were repealed under democrats, so it's their fault despite the extensive groundwork laid by Republicans ever since Roe v Wade was initially decided in the 1970s culminating in a Republican supermajority on the Supreme court that actually overturned the ruling. They think, why am I paying taxes to forgive someone else's student debt when I didn't go to college/payed off my college loans/worked my butt off for scholarships/made sacrifices so I could afford college/etc, not realizing that the debt forgiveness is really just making sure the programs that were already in place are actually implemented instead of allowing the loan servicers to continue milking these people for cash long after their debt should have been forgiven. They think the economy and how good/bad it's doing is solely up to the President despite the fact that the purse strings are held by Congress and the Federal Reserve, which controls interest rates, is an independent body not controlled by the President.

5. For the immigrants, they don't realize that all immigrants are persona non grata, not just people who came to the US illegally. My immigrant mother told me she votes for Trump because he's "gonna stop all the immigrants who are coming to take our jobs", not realizing that despite her naturalized citizenship, she will always be seen as one of those immigrants she talks about. She doesn't realize when he talks about chain migration, he's talking about the system she took advantage of to bring multiple members of her family to the US and allowed them much better quality of life than the relatives still in her home country. She thinks, because she lives in a large urban coastal area, that all parts of the US are just as accepting.

If you have a loved one with whom your only problem is politics (not abuse of any kind, but someone you love and care for), please consider staying in their lives. I am not saying make friends with people to try and change their beliefs, I am saying give your loved one a face to put to the "radical libs".

when people are like “oh so you’re just gonna judge someone for their political beliefs?” yes actually. I think someone’s values and opinions is a pretty reasonable thing to judge them for.

[lured-into-wonderland]

Levi's seen the girl around before, but even a small town like this one hasn't put them in each other's vicinity since high school. He remembers some science project they worked on together in 10th grade, but their circles didn't really mix outside of that class. But she's caught him on his break at work, standing outside, bundled in a winter flannel, smoking a cigarette. He's sure to blow the smoke away from her.

"Momma always like your name," he says idly when she decides to linger nearby him, looking in the windows of the shop instead of going inside. "Real God fearin' woman, my mom, thought that your name sounded Christ-like, like a nun." He scoffs, smoke curling from between his lips. He'd never been the religious sort, even growing up in the house he'd been adopted into.

"Anyway, you might not remember me. Name's Levi." With the cigarette between his lips, he reaches out a hand to shake hers.

She remembered him. At least his face. Nunnally was good with faces. Perhaps not so much with names, but he was outstanding enough back there in High School, so she kept his name in her memory. Was it then why she stood up next to him giving him a chance to talk to her?

It felt weird to be back. She never liked small towns; she was a girl from a city, and these few years she spent here, in the Southern town almost in the middle of nowhere, were not the best years in her life. Years just after her whole life was ruined. Years just after she had learnt the truth she now desperately wanted to forget. Though were the years before really that much better?

Levi… Apparently, there was nothing similar about them. His winter flannel was definitely in contrast with her expensive coat and knee-length dress; his messy hair (or at least she would describe it with this word) in contrast with her neat bun and elaborated hair-pin. A perfect Southern Lady and a… She internally laughed. Perhaps the military-style boots were the only thing they had in common. The only thing that made her no lady after all. She shrugged: --

“It’s Irish.” – it was weird she had an Irish name with presumably no Irish ancestors; her surname linked her origins to France, but she couldn’t be sure. She knew so little about her family and her father never spoke about it – “Some suggest it originates from the nun’s grove or even nunnery itself…” – she furrowed her brows and shrugged again – “…but I never liked this meaning. I prefer the other hypothesis. The meadow.” – not that it was that much better, but Nunnally was not a believer; religion always made her anxious, but she suspected it was a part of this town’s culture.

The cigarette smoke was disturbing to her, but since they were outside, it didn’t cause too much discomfort. She restrained herself from complaining. Nunnally accepted his the handshake with a smile: --

“I remember you. We were in the science project together…was it the 10th grade?”

“I also remember your mum. She was always nice to me. One of my…” – Nunnally hesitated – “…aunt’s close friends.” – she wasn’t sure if the woman she called ‘her aunt’ was really her family. But it was already long ago since she stopped asking questions. And that woman back there was kind to her; kind enough for Nunnally to come back to this town. Sometimes.   

“I had a crush on you back then.” – she suddenly confessed; not really sure why. Perhaps because it didn’t really matter. She was a completely different person now – “But you paid absolutely no attention to me. Probably not without a reason. I was a weirdo back then.” – perhaps a slightly harsh assessment, but she didn't make aby bonds. And her not being compatible with a small town was probably the least important one on the issues list.

“So, how have you been doing? You didn’t feel like leaving this town…” – that was surprising; she could not understand why people chose to stay – “It has not changed much, I feel…”

“Is that small café close to our school still open? What was it’s name…? Their pumpkin spice latte was one of the best I have ever had.”

At least that was one thing she could consider lucky. She was not stuck here.

@svnsworn

[pennylanewrites]

teacher’s aide (levi ackerman)

warnings: m!masturbation, voyerism, alcohol, smoking, age gap (15 years), me pushing my smitten!levi agenda

levi ackerman was an esteemed and recognised sociology professor. stern, strict and to the point in all of his lectures. most of his classes kept quiet, trying to take notes while he talked fast and went through powerpoint slides like it was the morning paper.

you had been working hard for that teacher’s aide position for two years, when you finally got the acceptance email. it was no secret on campus that professor ackerman’s assistants worked closely to him and got accepted in prestigious firms right after college, with his recommendation of course.

it was also no secret that professor ackerman was incredibly good-looking. his veiny arms and broad shoulders made up for his short height and the way his raven hair fell over his rectangular seeing glasses was so…

“y/n.” his stern voice shook you out of your thoughts. crap. the whole auditorium was staring at you. “the papers.” was all he said before going back to his laptop. you looked down at your hands, realising you were holding the class’s tests for more than you should. you cleared your throat and went through the auditorium, leaving a stack of papers in front of each student. as you walked down, your eye caught his.

levi noticed everything. he noticed how today you were wearing lipgloss instead of your usual lipstick, he noticed the rip in your tights that went down the back of your leg, your new platform loafers and the beads of sweat on your forehead. levi ackerman was not the kind of man that would catch feelings for a student, but you were so…good.

yes, at first he thought you were very attractive, and maybe that’s why he always rejected your aide application. but he also got to know you better every time you replied to one of his questions. you were the only student brave enough to raise their hand, and he appreciated that. sooner than later, you stayed back every day after class to clean up the mess of loose papers and pens, and before he knew it he was smitten.

maybe it was the way you brushed against him to clean the board and shut the projector, a timid apology escaping your lips, or the way you weren’t afraid to challenge him in a theoretical conversation about archaic philosophy during class.

or maybe…shit, how long have i been staring? levi looked away and cleared his throat when he noticed you trying to contain your smile.

class was over and you were going through your usual routine, marking left over questionnaires from the last lecture as he went through tomorrow’s one.

“sir, i’m wondering about…” you rolled your chair across the auditorium’s stage, holding onto his desk to stop the chair, “this one.” you pointed at a question on the paper.

levi was not one to lose his temper, but he was finding it very hard to contain himself when your knee was touching his and your perfume could reach his brain through his nose.

“well, this-this one…” he trailed off, watched you push your hair off your neck, leaving the bare skin on sight for him. god, he could eat you right then and there.

levi had never been more thankful for his phone to ring in his life. the vice dean’s name flashed on the screen, and you leaned back to allow him to get the device.

“i have to go…meeting…come by my office tonight, okay?” he scrambled to get his things and ran off, leaving you in the empty auditorium.

you let your head fall on your pillow, groaning with despair. he hates me. he can’t even talk to me.

you had seen him earlier with petra, his old t.a who graduated last year. he was laughing, for fuck’s sake. he was laughing and buying her coffee in the campus coffee house, and they were sitting over a book and…

“ugh! what is she even doing here?” you threw your pillow on the floor, but it hit you back in the face.

“oh my god, shut up!” your roommate kept hitting you with the pillow, until you grabbed it. “enough, y/n, please.”

“mikasa, do you think they’re dating?” you sat up on the bed, looking at the girl across you. “be honest, i can take it.”

“i think you’re sick. there’s something seriously wrong with you.” she scrunched her nose up in disgust.

“he’s so…”

“old.”

“mature.”

“he’s mature because he’s old.” your roommate kindly reminded you of your age difference. “get over him, please. even if he liked you, he’s your teacher. i doubt he would put his job in danger.”

your eyes lit up, an excited smile covering your earlier gloom.

“you think he likes me?”

“that’s not what i said. where are you going?”

you only grinned before grabbing your bag and barging out of the dorm room. your shoes squeezed against the polished floors as you made your way to the teachers’ wing, and to the third door to your left, your favourite wooden door in the world.

with a sigh, you lifted your fist to knock, but something made you freeze. you looked around to make sure no one was in the corridor, before pushing your ear against the door.

shit, shit, shit, shit

he was moaning. fucking moaning, in his office, when he had specifically told you to visit him. you thought of the possibility of him having a girl in there, even petra, but no one else could be heard. everything right in your head was telling you to turn around and leave, but your hand was on the doorknob, and you were slowly twisting it.

just one look. one look and i’ll-

your eyes grew wide at the sight. a half empty bottle of bourbon sat next to an empty glass, a cigarette was slowly burning on the ashtray, the first two buttons of his white shirt were undone. god, you could clearly see his nipples through the fabric. the desk obscured your vision, but you could see his hand moving up and down, up and down, up-

“fu-fuuuck.” his voice strained, his head fell back and you were wet a creep.

you turned around and leaned against the wall, taking a deep breath. looking at your reflection on your phone, you made sure pervert wasn’t written across your forehead, and turned back around.

two soft knocks on the door. levi fixed his hair quickly, buttoned his shirt and put the cigarette out.

“come in.” you entered the room and he looked at you like a deer caught in the headlights.

“long day?” you pointed at the bottle, smiling softly. he chuckled and motioned for you to sit down. “i can come back some other…” you trailed off when he took another glass out, filling it halfway and pushing it towards you.

you fidgeted with a ring on your finger, unsure of what to do.

“i shouldn’t…”

“i won’t tell if you won’t.” he filled his own glass and raised it to you, before taking a sip. you smiled softly, taking a sip of the drink. it burned coming down, just like his gray stare on you did.

“i have the tests marked. that question i was wondering about earlier,” you took the stack of papers out of your bag, leaving them in front of the man.

“yeah, i looked it up. it’s actually-”

“i figured it out.” you cut him off. he raised an eyebrow and put his glasses on, looking down at the marked paper, and the right answer which you had wrote down in red ink.

“you did.” he agreed and looked at you through strands of his raven hair. “good girl.”

you froze. you could feel your whole face turning an ugly shade of red. a million disgusting thoughts ran through your head as he walked around the desk to sit on the chair across from yours. his muscles flexed as he reached over the desk to get the ashtray and his drink. you took a big sip of the drink, trying to convince yourself the sexual tension was just in your head.

fuck. fuck, fuck, fuck.

“what?” he shook you out of your thoughts. he knew you were staring at him.

“nothing. i’ve never seen you like this.” you admitted, still sipping your drink.

“like what?”

like you don’t have a stick up your ass.

“relaxed.” you opted for the nice comment.

“i’m far from relaxed, trust me.” you watched as he placed a cigarette between his wet lips, lighting it with a white lighter.

“those are bad luck.” you took the lighter in your hand, fidgeting with it.

“huh. maybe that’s why my life’s shit.” he chuckled, taking a drag of the cigarette.

“come on…” your eyes fell on a book on his desk.

masculine domination, pierre bourdieu. you grinned, taking it in your hands to inspect the front page.

“take it. it’s for my doctorate students, but i think you-”

“i’ve read it.” you closed it and put it back on the pile.

“of course you have. you’re a smart girl, you know?”

he was praising you. and he was filling your glass again. when did you even finish the first?

“are you trying to get me drunk, sir?”

“i think you’re capable of controlling yourself.”

“don’t be so sure.” you mumbled, staring at your feet.

“what was that?”

“nothing!” you shook it off with a smile, but he had heard you just fine.

god, you wanted him so bad. as the hours went by, and the bottle came to its’ end, you became more and more impatient. you were scared of what you would do honestly, if one more drop of alcohol entered your system. but, were you crazy to think he wanted this too? why would he pour you a drink, and ask you all these questions, and make you laugh with stupid jokes if he-

“what are you thinking about?” he shook you out of your thoughts. you showed him the clock on the wall.

“that i should get going. some teacher thought it would be a good idea to have an 8 am class.” you grinned. you reached your hand out to return him his lighter, but you dropped it instead.

“that’s one lousy teacher.” he chuckled, kneeling on the floor to get the lighter. you waited for him to get up, so you could too, but he wouldn’t move. still kneeling, he came closer to you, his hands hesitantly moving to rest on the sides of your thighs.

internally, you were screaming. but not a single breath came out of your mouth as you watched him. he sighed and finally locked eyes with you.

“i’m not crazy, am i?”

“wh-what?” your voice came out as a whisper. pathetic.

“to think there’s something, right? here. there’s something here and i-”

“sir-”

“don’t.” he squeezed your thighs and you swore your heart would jump out your chest sooner or later. he straightened his back and got up, pulling you with him. “don’t call me sir.”

you let him seat you on top of his desk, you let him spread your legs and stand between them. he pushed your hair behind your ear and inched closer. his breath against your neck made you shiver, and a soft kiss forced a small gasp out of your mouth.

your hands trembled as you placed them around his neck, and his breath staggered when you played with the strands of hair that fell on his undercut.

“please kiss me.” he swore his knees would give when he heard your voice, so soft, so sweet. you were as needy for him as he was for you.

his strong hands met your face, his silver ring cooled your burning cheek. you closed your eyes, and his lips finally met yours. it was careful at first, both of you scared the other would change their mind. but all it took was you pulling him closer by the collar of his shirt, and he lost his mind. his hands slipped down to your waist and you arched your back to get closer to him, if that was even possible. your mouth trailed to his jaw, leaving sloppy kisses all the way down his neck. a playful bite made him gasp. you chuckled.

“stop. you’ll drive me crazy.” he squeezed your hip.

“good.” you grinned and leaned in to kiss him again, but his hand in your hair held you back.

“you have to go…” he managed between soft kisses down your chest, at least as far as your shirt allowed, “or i won’t be able to stop.” he held your hands, and kissed them both, maintaining eye contact with you.

“then don’t stop.” you whined, but your grin turned into a frown when he pulled you off the desk and fixed your skirt. “levi-”

“save something for later, right?”

his promise of a later was enough. you left him to clean up and walked out the door with a sheepish smile and a whispered goodnight.

your phone buzzed on your way back to the dorms, and you stopped in your tracks when you saw the name on the screen.

professor ackerman: wear that green dress tomorrow.

you raised an eyebrow.

just the dress.

[anna-the-undertaker]

The Boys reaction to a Blue Collar Worker MC who was summoned to the Devildom in nothing but a towel...

I finally did this after so long.... Idk whats happening but I've been on a writing kick recently so we will see how you all like my writing I guess lmao also we are ignoring how mammon wasn't in the room when MC arrives in game cause I'm lazy.

Tags: @lurkingblue @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf

part 1

Lucifer

Lucifer's eyes narrowed as he took in the sight before him. A human, fresh out of a bath and barely coherent, standing in the heart of the Devildom, had the audacity to speak in such a manner. The request for clothes, food, and rest was delivered with a bluntness that bordered on insolence. Normally, he wouldn't tolerate such disrespect, especially not in Diavolo's presence. Lucifer prided himself on order and discipline, and this human's arrival was anything but. He could feel his patience thinning, a not so rare occurrence that he worked hard to suppress. This was the human chosen by Diavolo? His expression remained impassive, but the air around him grew colder as he spoke. "You are in no position to make demands, human. Consider yourself fortunate that Lord Diavolo is more generous than I."

How he looks back on it now: Lucifer, sitting with a glass of Demonus in hand, would let out a long, exasperated sigh. “I still can't believe that was our first impression of them. Summoned to the Devildom in a towel, dripping water all over the floor like they owned the place. And then—then—they have the audacity to demand food, clothes, and a bed as if they were checking into a five-star hotel. I knew from that moment that MC would be nothing but trouble... and I wasn’t wrong.”

Mammon

Mammon, caught somewhere between surprise and amusement, couldn’t help but let out a bark of a laugh. This human was something else. Appearing in the middle of the Devildom, demanding food and a place to sleep like they owned the place? Mammon could almost admire that kind of guts, if it wasn't so ridiculous. But he was also intrigued. They were obviously tired and out of their depth, but there was a spark of defiance in them that piqued his curiosity. "Hey, hey, maybe we should cut ‘em some slack, yeah? Look at ‘em, they’re about ready to keel over. Not exactly how I pictured meetin’ a human though…"

How he looks back on it now: Mammon would be laughing, practically doubled over. “Ya shoulda seen Lucifer’s face! He was so mad, but he didn’t know what to do! And then there’s MC, barely awake, tellin’ us off like we were the ones who interrupted their shower! They’re a riot, I tell ya. I knew right then and there—this human was gonna be somethin’ special.”

Leviathan

Leviathan blinked rapidly, trying to process what he was seeing. This was supposed to be the human exchange student? This tired, wet mess of a person who was talking like they had just walked into a convenience store? Levi was torn between feeling embarrassed for them and being mildly impressed by their nerve. But mostly, he just felt awkward. He shifted uncomfortably, avoiding direct eye contact, his facing burning with a fierce blush as he searched for something to hide behind. "This is so… weird. Like, who even does that? Walking into a place like this… in a towel? It’s like something out of a bad anime."

How he looks back on it now: Levi would be blushing, trying to hide behind his manga. “I mean, it was like something out of an anime, right? The clueless protagonist just casually demanding things from these powerful beings… it’s straight out of a ‘reverse isekai’ plot! But honestly, I was too busy being embarrassed for them to laugh at the time. Now, though? It’s kind of hilarious. They just… stood there, barely dressed, like it was no big deal!”

Satan

Satan observed the human with a critical eye. The situation was strange, even by Devildom standards, but it also presented an interesting puzzle. Who was this human to speak so boldly? They were clearly exhausted, pushed to their limits, but there was something almost… primal about their directness. It was as if survival instincts had taken over. "Interesting. They’re either incredibly brave or too exhausted to care about decorum. I wonder how long they’ll last here if this is how they start."

How he looks back on it now: Satan would smirk, his eyes glinting with amusement. “I admit, I didn’t expect a mere human to have the nerve to make demands right after being summoned. It was… refreshing, to say the least. I could see the frustration in Lucifer’s eyes, and I knew I was going to enjoy having MC around. They didn’t bow down in fear—they just wanted a nap. Brilliant.”

Asmodeus

Asmodeus couldn’t help but giggle, though there was a glint of curiosity in his eyes. This human was definitely not what he had expected. They were dripping water everywhere, their hair clinging to their skin, and yet, instead of being mortified, they were making demands. It was almost endearing in its own way, like a lost kitten mewling for attention. "Oh my, aren’t you just precious? But darling, if you’re going to make demands like that, at least do it with a bit more flair. Still, I think we can find you something more… suitable to wear or you could just lose the towel all together."

How he looks back on it now: Asmo would be giggling, twirling a lock of his hair around his finger. “Oh, it was such a scandal! A human, in a towel, dripping wet in front of everyone! And yet, they had this… effortless confidence. It was kind of hot, honestly. And their skin looked amazing—I was so jealous! I just knew I had to befriend them. Anyone who can pull off an entrance like that is someone I need to know!”

Beelzebub

Beelzebub’s concern was immediate but simple. The human was obviously tired and hungry, and those were things he could easily understand. He frowned slightly, glancing around the room as if expecting someone to step in and help. "They should eat something. And rest. They said they’re about to pass out. We can figure everything else out after."

How he looks back on it now: Beel would nod thoughtfully, his focus split between the memory and whatever snack he’s holding. “I just remember being really confused… and hungry. They said something about food, and I thought, ‘Yeah, I could go for a snack too.’ But they didn’t even seem scared, just tired and hungry. I get that. We connected on a deep level that day.”

Diavolo

Diavolo, on the other hand, was more fascinated than anything else and couldn't help the booming laugh that escaped him. The human’s arrival, so raw and unfiltered, was not what he had planned, but it was a glimpse into their true character. He appreciated the honesty in their exhaustion and the way they set boundaries despite being in an unfamiliar and likely frightening situation. "Welcome to the Devildom," he said warmly, his voice cutting through the tension. "We will, of course, ensure you are taken care of. Rest first, and we’ll discuss everything else when you’re ready."

How he looks back on it now: Diavolo would laugh heartily, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “Oh, that was classic! I thought we were about to welcome our human exchange student with a grand, royal introduction. You know, something to set the tone! And then… poof! In they come, in nothing but a towel, demanding food and a nap! I couldn’t help but admire their spirit—who else would have the audacity to make demands of a demon lord? Honestly, I knew right then that they were going to make things very interesting around here.”

Barbatos

Barbatos watched with his usual calm demeanor, though his mind was already calculating what would be needed to accommodate this unexpectedly demanding guest. He was intrigued by their bluntness, a trait not often seen in someone so new to the Devildom. "It seems we have our work cut out for us. I’ll prepare something for them to wear and eat. This situation, unusual as it is, can be addressed once they’ve had the rest they need."

How he looks back on it now: Barbatos would smile subtly, a hint of amusement in his usually composed demeanor. “It was certainly… unexpected. I remember thinking, ‘Ah, this is going to be a challenge.’ I had prepared everything for a formal welcome, and suddenly I was considering where I could find suitable clothing on such short notice. But what really stood out was their confidence. They weren’t intimidated at all—just tired. It was almost endearing, in a way. Though I must admit, I’ve never had to prepare a royal feast for someone who was dripping on the floor before.”

The other characters after hearing of MC's dramatic arrival later -

Belphegor

Belphegor, still hidden away, was not present to witness the scene firsthand, but the way the human handled their introduction would later reach his ears. He would find it amusing, this tired human, dragged into a world they couldn’t possibly understand and still demanding rest. It would have made him laugh, perhaps even endeared them to him in a strange way, though he’d never admit it. “I think it's hilarious. They were so focused on getting some sleep, just like me. Honestly, I'm impressed. I don’t even care that they're human. Anyone who prioritizes a nap over everything else has their priorities straight in my book.”

Simeon

Simeon would laugh softly, shaking his head in disbelief. “Oh, MC. Only you could be summoned into a realm of demons in nothing but a towel and somehow manage to make demands! I can just imagine the look on Lucifer’s face. It’s impressive—you're like a stubborn ray of sunshine cutting through the darkest clouds. I’d love to have seen it!”

Luke

Luke would be flabbergasted, his eyes wide with a mix of horror and indignation. “They were summoned like that? That’s so unfair! I bet they were freezing! Who does that? Demons, apparently! But you know what? Good for them for telling those demons off! That’s what they deserve for being so unprepared. If I were there, I would’ve given them a piece of my mind too!”

Solomon

Solomon would be grinning, clearly amused by the whole scenario. “That’s classic MC—turning a moment of complete chaos into one where they’re the one calling the shots. I can just picture them standing there, dripping water all over the floor, and casually telling the future King of the Devildom that they need a nap. Honestly, it’s moments like this that make me glad I chose them as my apprentice. They’ve got the kind of audacity that most people can only dream of!”

Rapheal

Raphael, known for his serious demeanor, would hear about MC’s first arrival to the Devildom and probably raise an eyebrow, trying to picture the scene. "So, they appeared in a towel and demanded food and rest? Bold. Very bold." After a pause, he’d add with a rare smirk, "They might survive down here better than I thought."

Mephistopheles

Mephistopheles, with his aristocratic air, would be caught between disbelief and amusement. “They really told Lucifer and Diavolo off in a towel? If only I could’ve seen that! The looks on their faces must’ve been priceless. Perhaps I’ll write a column about the ‘indecent’ summons of the human exchange student!” He’d chuckle at his own joke, imagining the uproar it would cause.

Thirteen

Thirteen, with her mischievous streak, would find the whole thing hilarious. “They really popped in like that? A towel, dripping water, and told everyone to get their act together? That’s brilliant! I would’ve loved to see everyone’s reaction. I bet Lucifer’s face turned fifty shades of red. I like this human already—got some real spunk!” She’d laugh, already planning some pranks inspired by the story.

[devildomwriter]

Dancing With the Devil | Diavolo x Reader

AFAB! Reader | 5.5K Words

This takes place during the first year of the exchange program. MC is shy and a little awkward around their long time crush, Diavolo only to find his feelings are fully reciprocated in a dance of passion

CW: Explicit sex

*If this story is familiar I had it on my previous blog and it’s on my wattpad*

"I'm sure I can get some kind of sexual gratification just by staring if I try hard enough," you mumbled as you leaned on the palace counter gossiping with Asmo.

He laughed and patted you on the back.

"I've been trying for that one for a while," he sighed, admiring the prince, letting his eyes linger over his v-line.

"Such a sexy outfit, too," you sighed, and Asmo nodded.

You and the brothers and other exchange students were attending a spring ball at the castle, watching Diavolo laugh with Lucifer, Barbatos, and a few nobles you didn't recognize. Beelzebub entered the kitchen then, and you quickly shut up about your little crush on the prince; however, Asmo did not.

"Each time I get cuddly with him, Lucifer brings out his whips."

"Oh yikes, ...you think he'd...?"

"Use them on you? I'm sure he'd only do that in the bedroom," he grinned wickedly, and you slapped his arm.

"You always say stuff like that about your own brothers, you weirdo," and he began to laugh while Beelzebub dug trough the fridge behind you both.

You turned around and watched him as he began stuffing things in his mouth.

"Umm...Beelzebub don't you think Lucifer will get mad?"

He turned around and tried to speak with his mouth full of food, but neither you or Asmo understood what he was trying to say.

"Beelzebub finish chewing first please," Asmo sighed, and Beelzebub swallowed everything down in one gulp, which was mildly impressive if not also terrifying.

"Whatcha doing in the kitchen with MC, hm?" Mammon asked as he strutted towards the three of you.

Beelzebub stood up, and Mammon jumped a little, having noticed his other brother from behind the kitchen island.

"Geez Beel, ya know yer gonna get in trouble with Luci-"

"What are you four doing in here?" you heard Lucifer growl, and you turned around nervously to look at Lucifer, Diavolo standing with an unamused face behind him.

"Uh-"

Before Mammon could finish talking, Lucifer glared him down, and Mammon ran from the room.

"Talking with my dear MC," Asmo smiles innocently, tilting his head to the side.

Lucifer pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed as he looked at Beel.

"Beelzebub? What makes you think you can steal the food from Lord Diavolo's fridge?" He growled, and Asmo took your arms and led you from the room.

You nearly brushed Diavolo's arm as you passed, and he glanced at you for a moment. You could feel his eyes on you as you were lead back to your table.

Solomon, Simeon, Luke, Leviathan and Belphegor were sat at the table. Solomon was observing people while Luke and Simeon talked, Leviathan played on a portable game device, and Belphegor snored next to his plate.

"Beel's gonna eat full, huh?" Mammon asked, appearing from nowhere. Asmo glared at him and took his seat next to you, stroking your arm gently. Mammon was pissed off by this and sat on your other side, tugging your arm to lean into him, and you sighed.

"He really couldn't wait a few minutes until dinner was served, huh?"

"That's Beel for you," Belphegor murmured, half awake.

Levi nodded, not taking his eyes off his device.

You glanced back to where Diavolo has been and noticed he was no longer by Lucifer's side but welcoming latecomers.

Who would dare arrive late for a royal event? You rolled your eyes as he bent over the succubus's hand and kissed it as a formality. Hopefully, it was just a formality.

Lucifer dragged Beelzebub out from the kitchen and marched to your table while the other brothers tensed up at his arrival.

"But it was really good-"

"That is no reason to steal from his majesty," Lucifer barked, and Beel looked at the ground moping while Belphie rubbed his shoulder.

Lucifer turned his attention to you, sat between Asmo and mammon.

"This is not the seating arrangement, return to your seats," he ordered through grit teeth, and Mammon and Asmo reluctantly returned and waited in the right seats while Lucifer glared them down to make sure they all stayed in place.

"MC, Simeon, Luke, Solomon; my lord requests you dine at his table once dinner is served," Barbatos said with a bow as he approached the table.

Luke looked annoyed, but Simeon smiled as he was used to speaking with Diavolo. Solomon smiled, eyes closed as he likely plotted something, and you turned beet red.

Asmo snickered, and Lucifer glared.

"What is so amusing, Asmodeus? Is there something I should know about?" He interrogated, and Asmo raised his hands and shook his head.

"Of course not," he said sweetly and flicked his eyes to meet yours for a moment.

You felt your ears burning and tried not to express your nervousness. You were always able to disguise your nervousness around Diavolo. He was an amazing friend to you, but you couldn't deny the way he made you feel when you were in private.

Every time you saw him, you wondered if it would be your chance, if you ever got one. Unfortunately, tonight it would seem you'll be sitting by the angels as well, and you'd feel a lot worse for thinking such things about the future demon king when around them.

Lucifer looked surprised by his lord's request as it wasn't originally planned but sighed and turned to you as you got up slowly and made your way to Diavolo.

Diavolo made the announcement dinner would be served, and everyone made their way to their assigned seats.

You weren't sure which one to take this time, but Diavolo pulled out the chair next to himself, and your heart skipped a beat as you sat down.

You smiled up at him and mouthed 'thank you' as he addressed the audience.

Barbatos announced what was being served, and there were whispers of excitement around the room as the butlers and kitchen servers walked out in line to bring each table its meal.

Everyone resumed their conversations, and Diavolo smiled at you. You smiled back, hoping you weren't blushing and your eyes lit up in excitement as the food reach your table.

Diavolo chuckled, and you gave him an inquisitive look.

"And just what’s so funny?" He teased.

"Your eyes light up exactly as Beelzebub's do whenever you are served food here," he observed, and you blushed.

"Well who doesn't like food?"

"Everyone likes food, MC, you just like it a lot," Luke agreed, and you sighed in defeat.

Simeon and Luke silently prayed over their meal while Solomon, Diavolo, and you dug in. "The last time we ate here, Solomon nearly killed us," you reminisced, and a shiver went down everyone's spine, even Diavolo looked disturbed by the memories.

Solomon just chuckled to himself, still smiling.

"And Asmo didn't even warn us," Luke mumbled.

"Speaking of Asmodeus, MC, you seem quite fond of him?" Diavolo asked.

"D-Diavolo?" You gasped and Simeon laughed.

"What? Is it not common knowledge?"

You turned to the others and asked, "does it seem like Asmo, and I are fond of each other?"

They each nodded, as did Barbatos when he approached to take his seat in Diavolo's other side.

"What? No way we aren't like that at all? He's like a gal pal sort of person to me. He does my hair and nails and we gossip and talk about boys and stuff - it's really nothing romantic at all-" you explained hurriedly, and Simeon laughed.

"So you talk about boys you've met here in the Devildom then?" Solomon pressed, and your face was visibly red.

"Well-I-"

Luke seemed annoyed, but the others were amused. You turned around and mouthed 'Hel͏p me' to the brothers' table where most of them were watching you intently.

Asmo gave a thumbs up, and you wanted to murder him; that was such a clear sign he knew something about one of the men at the table, and Diavolo caught onto it as he gave you an amused grin.

You facepalmed and stuffed your face with food to avoid the topic.

Diavolo asked Simeon, Luke, and Solomon about purgatory hall, studying methods, people at the school, everything you would normally ask an exchange student. So why did he ask you something so blunt? Was it just because it came up?

As soon as you heard Diavolo's hearty laugh, you were filled with an intense desire. This time purely romantic, he was so hot and so adorable, how could you possibly keep yourself away from this man.

"MC, I'm quite surprised I must admit that the brothers have not attempted to claim you in some way?" Diavolo suddenly brought up, much to everyone else’s surprise.

"What the-? If I may ask my lord why is it you seem so curious about my love life or lack thereof," you nearly choked on your food as the other watched in amusement, including Barbatos, who gave a knowing grin.

"You are our only,” he glanced at Solomon “…regular human exchange student, so it had me quite curious is all, especially since they've all changed so much since meeting you," he excused. Solomon gave him a confused and offended look but he ignored him in favor of watching your reaction.

Once your meal was finished, you awkwardly made your way back to the brothers, where Lucifer intercepted you and pulled you to the side out of sight.

"What were you speaking of with lord Diavolo," he demanded to know.

"For some reason my love life-"

Lucifer was red with anger, "why would you discuss such a thing!? Honestly MC I expected better of you-"

"He brought it up!" You exclaimed, and he was taken aback.

"What?"

"Yeah, and he kept bringing it back up, trust me I tried to avoid it."

"Why would he do such a thing, how was it brought up?"

"He said Asmo and I seemed close; I don't know?"

He hummed to himself, looking to the side and spun around, making his way to Diavolo, who smiled seeing his friend, and his face became confused when he saw how upset Lucifer seemed to be. You weren't sure what was said, but he simply laughed at his friend and patted his shoulder while Lucifer seemed to be angrily relaying what you'd said. You sighed, hoping you didn't seem like a tattletale. Just then Asmo linked his arm through yours and dragged you even deeper into the shadows of the empty hallways.

"Asmo, what the heck?"

"He so likes you!" He whisper shouted, and you blushed.

"Huh!?"

"I can tell these things MC you know that, you so have to do something. I can't believe you could totally get laid by the prince tonight!"

You turned red and jumped, slapping a hand over Asmo's mouth.

"What the hell, Asmo!?"

"Don't think I forgot about what you told me earlier; sexual gratification and all that, my charm may not work on you, but I know it's what you desire," he teased and smirked leaning in closer to you.

"Asmodeus, MC," you heard Diavolo's voice boom loudly through the halls though he spoke normally. Lucifer followed him closely and glared daggers at Asmodeus.

"Asmo, a word," Lucifer hissed, and Asmo winked at you and pranced after Lucifer.

You were left in the shadows alone with Diavolo, who smiled down at you.

"Did you need to ask me something?" You ask nervously, unsure of what else to say.

"I thought I'd tell you how lovely you look tonight, MC. I'm sure many will be eager to dance with you at the ball."

You blushed and looked away.

"Probably just the brothers like last time, or Solomon..." you thought aloud, and he smiled.

"You've done so much for this exchange program, and for the pillars so far, I cannot think of many ways to express my gratitude but perhaps sharing the first dance of the night with me could prove it to you in some way," he offered, and you gasped.

"R-really? But I have no idea how to dance, I'll be humiliated, and you'll be embarrassed by me-"

"Now why would I be embraced by you, MC, I'm quite proud of you, actually."

"You are?"

"Of course. Did I not just mention how much you've done for the brothers?"

You looked away shyly, extremely happy on the inside, and nodded.

He laughed at how cute you were being and held out his hand for you to take. You took it without questions, and he led you to an empty room.

"Where are we going?"

"The piano room.”

"You have an entire room for a piano?"

"But of course. Where else should I put such a prized possession?" You laughed at his surprised face, as if it were very common to have a room specifically for an instrument.

"So..."

"Why are you going there?" He read your thoughts, "the first dance does not start for an hour. I thought perhaps we could practice our dance to ease your nerves. Quite frankly, I'd also like to get to know you better, and I believe this is a better place to do so then somewhere people will circle around me or in a long dark hallway."

You chuckled and agreed and noticed his eyes light up a bit when he heard your laugh. The same way you always reacted when you heard his. Was it stupid to think whatever feelings you had could come to fruition? This man was ruler of the demons, the next devil himself; and you...you were a struggling human college student with a lot of issues.

After turning through many corridors and climbing several stairs which admittedly exhausted you, especially in heels, you reached two large doors and were surprised by the interior when he pushed them open.

"This isn't the piano room," you stated, and he blushed.

"I did intend to bring you there, but...I believe the view from my balcony is a much better place to dance and to talk." He said, seeming a little embarrassed, and you walked by his king-sized bed and to his balcony through two huge glass doors.

He was right. The view was breathtaking, and you smiled in awe. He watched you adoringly as you twirled, attempting to look innocently beautiful, but instead, you fell over.

He rushed to your side as you laughed at yourself to stop you from crying for embarrassing yourself like that in front of your crush.

"MC, are you alright?" He asked and lifted your dress to check your ankle. He looked it over and determined it wasn't injured in any way.

He helped you to your feet, and you hid your face in his chest, still blushing like mad. He laughed and ran his fingers through his hair.

"As much as I'd love to dance with you, I'm way too embarrassed to do something like that in front of everyone..." you mumbled sadly.

He detected the sadness in your voice and nodded, understanding your decision. Humans could be so fragile and so easily embarrassed; it was a little entertaining.

"There is still an hour until my presence is required, is there something else you'd like to do? Perhaps we could take a stroll in my garden? Or I could show you the view from the highest point in the castle," he suggested.

"I don't understand why you're being so kind to me, Diavolo. Shouldn't you be meeting with nobles and hosting and such," you trailed off, and he tilted your head to look at him, cupping your cheek and smiling sadly.

"I've done so for thousands of years. I can afford to miss an hour," he comforted, and you brightened up.

"Okay, if you're sure," you smiled, and he nodded and took your hand in his leading you away from the balcony.

"Then what do you have in mind, MC?" He asked with a somewhat mischievous smile, and you felt the butterflies doing backflips in your stomach as you stammered.

"I-I don't know. Is there something you'd like to do?"

"Why, yes, there is. Though I'll need your consent," he smiled, and your heartbeat erratically.

"Of course," you agreed, not a hundred percent certain what he'd ask but hopeful.

Every second you'd spent silently pining until that moment was worth it as he leaned into you, eyes closed, and sealed your lips together.

When you parted, you stared at him with joyful surprise, and he seemed relieved you weren't opposed.

"D-do you think we could do that again...for maybe like the whole hour?" You joked nervously. He laughed and agreed, this time leading you to his bed.

You sat on the edge heart beating out of your chest, and he sat next to you and brought your lips back to his.

You eased into the kiss, and he wrapped his arm around you to support you as he deepened the kiss. Your lips would only separate a brief moment before reuniting desperately. Diavolo's hand squeezed your waist, and you could feel his long black nails as he pushed you backwards into the mattress. You let his tongue slip past your lips, wisely giving him immediate access. The prince was likely never denies anything, and besides, you didn't want to deny him. This was heaven in the middle of hell.

As his tongue tangled with yours excitedly, he reached one hand to the waist of your dress and hiked the skirt up enough to reach for the waistline of your tights and began slipping them off. That's when you could confirm this was going to be more than kissing, and your thoughts began to race uncontrollably as your tights and heels came off together. He wasted no time in slipping off your underwear, and you shivered at the cold air against your inner thighs. You gave him a confused look, and he laughed lightheartedly.

"I assume you don't want to wear wet underwear for the rest of the night?" He chuckled, and you turned red and agreed as he brought your lips back to his. He slid his hands under your dress and held your waist, pressing it against his.

He was still fully clothed, and you didn't find it fair. As if he could genuinely read your mind, he transformed back into his demon-self, his natural self. You admired his silky red hair and, for some reason, very sexy horns as he continued to kiss you. He bit your lip playfully and left a trail of kisses from your mouth to your neck, sensually kissing about the collarbone, sucking, licking, and biting the exposed skin.

You moved your hands to his bare chest, feeling his muscles and sift skin and purred happily to yourself. He left your mouth for a moment, just long enough to remove his fur infinity scarf and his jewelry, placing them delicately on the dresser by his bed where he retrieved a condom. He looked back and you and stared before you realized you were still spreading your legs completely exposed.

"D-Diavolo," you stuttered, and he chuckled to himself and slid off his leather boots and baggy pants, revealing his demon form had no underwear underneath, and you bit your lip staring at his firm ass.

"Why don't we remove that dress before it gets ruined," he suggested though it was more of a firm request.

You nodded and unzipped the back enough to slip it off. He crawled back onto the bed in front of you and placed you on his leg, bringing his lips back to yours as he unhooked and slid off your bra.

He threw back the covers and covered your exposed back with a sheet. The curtains were closed, and the door was locked, but he still seemed precautious with you. Just in case Lucifer angrily threw open the door, suspecting you both.

He placed one hand in the small of your back, and the other held the back of your head as his lips trailed back to your neck. His hands began to roam your body and feel your curves, squeeze your hips, delicately brush the pads of his fingers down your spine. You were surprised how delicate this giant of a man could be, and you realized he must have experience. You grew hotter at the idea and began kissing his neck as he left hickeys on yours. Your lips let slip a soft moan, and his grip on your hips tightened as he flipped you over, underneath him again, chests mere inches apart. He was trying to control his breathing, but his heavy breaths were an indicator he was struggling to hold back instead of taking you immediately. But he knew this wouldn’t just be painful in general but would be even worse for a fragile human. His fingers brushed over your cheek, and he turned his attention to your chest. His eyes lingering for several seconds before he supported his weight with one hand and used the other to lightly massage your breast. His wings flapped for a brief second, giving away his excitement, and you moved your hands to the back of his neck, bringing him closer to you. He met your eyes; his were serious and curious. He was concentrating hard on not harming you and looking for any signs of fear or hesitation in your expressions, but your smile was enough to ease him. He moved his mouth to your chest careful not to hit your face with his protruding horns, and you tilted your head back to avoid them as you ran your hand through his hair, massaging his head as he began trailing his tongue around your tit, squeezing it lightly with his hand before taking it in-between his teeth.

You squirmed and whimpered, and he looked up to make sure you weren't in pain, but your gentle moans as he continued reassured him you'd be fine.

You were so caught up in the way he made you feel you realized you weren't verbally encouraging him or telling him what felt best, which would likely help him instead of him cautiously taking each step so slowly. "Diavolo," you moaned softly, face heated, and he paused.

"Don't stop, you feel so good," you encouraged, and his small bites around your tits became a bit harder before he moved to the breast that'd been left unattended. Normally he'd massage one while licking the other, but his weight was too much for a human. He switched hands and twirled his thumb around the areola as you continued to moan his name.

"MC," his voice deepened as he moaned, and your heart leaped. For so long you wanted to hear him moan your name, now you were under his sheets, your bodies entangled as he moved his hand down between your thighs.

You felt his finger brush against your opening and moaned, body pleading for more contact. He let your squirm and laughed as you did so, entertained by your neediness. He inserted a finger slowly and was pleased to find you were already very wet.

"Do you want me that badly, dear?" He asked, and you blushed but nodded, biting your lip. He found this sexy and keeping his hand between your legs he kissed your lips, propping himself up as he pulled back the sheets to get a better look at you. Hit by the cold air again, you shivered and moaned. He moved his eyes over your body before looking at himself, hoping you'd follow his eyes, which of course, you did.

You weren't just surprised by his size but legitimately scare and full of many questions.

"Umm-that's?"

"Will you be alright," he asked teasingly, and you nodded, red-faced.

It had to be a little more than twelve inches in length, and you weren't sure how much you were even capable of taking in. His dick was a sight to behold, and one reason was it certainly wasn't human, the veins were thick, and the shaft had small circular bumps that acted like barbs. Once he was inside of you entirely, he wouldn't be able to pull out until he came. The condom he'd grabbed earlier would likely prevent this, but of course, you couldn't tell. Each time you opened your mouth, all that came out was a moan.

You nearly formed words until he inserted a second finger inside of you, and his other hand pushed your head into his chest. You ran your hands over his pecs and left small kisses on his collarbone and chest. A moan built in his throat, and he rested his head atop yours as he made a scissoring motion with his fingers. You squeezed your legs together, and he grinned as you squirmed in his embrace. He tightened his grip around you and inserted a third finger. His fingers were long and large, and the pointed black nails scratched lightly against your inner walls in all the right places. As he inserted a fourth finger, he moved his thumb to your clit and began massaging it in circles. You were a mewling mess in his grasp, and he let out an instinctive grunt.

He was desperately holding himself back as he pumped his fingers in and out quickly. He moaned your name into your hair and kissed the top of your head, gritting his teeth together, pumping faster and faster until a wave of heat ran through your body, and your eyes squeezed shut in the intensely pleasurable warmth. He felt you cum over his fingers and grinned wickedly. He held your stare as he raised his fingers to his lips and sucked off your juices, you blushed furiously, shocked that the prince had this kind of side to him. His grin was loving but also a little sadistically curious. Probably because he was about to fuck your lights out. He licked his lips and moved his hand back between your legs, still holding your gaze lovingly.

"MC," he began in a husky voice that made you shiver.

"Y-yes?"

"Do you think you can take me within you now?" His words were drawn out and held back an anxious growl.

You nodded, though you were unsure.

"I see," he smiled and sat up quickly to retrieve and roll the condom over his length, though it didn't cover his shaft completely it would be enough to stop most cum from pouring into you, and the idea had you becoming wet again already.

Diavolo's eyes darted to the clock on his wall to make sure he had enough time and was pleasantly surprised he had more than enough time to make you squeal and scream beneath him.

He admired your form. A small human brave enough to let the demon prince slam his cock inside of them. They likely didn't know how hard it could be for them or the pricking pain of the barbs, but they were ready nonetheless. He moved over you and spread your legs apart, he admired your throbbing pussy and looked back to your trembling body, nervous but desperate for him, and he moved his hips to yours, the head of his dick pressed against you. He used one hand to spread your entrance apart enough to fit his head inside, and he mumbled to himself through grit teeth, "You're so tight-."

He slowly moved his dick deeper inside you, taking deep breaths not even halfway in to stop himself from suddenly bucking into you. He was big enough to make you bleed, and that's the last thing he wanted. He'd wanted to do this with you for so long, and seeing you completely unaware of Asmo's attempts on you that night made his temptation too much to hold back any longer. He wanted you himself, and he finally had you. This thought unintentionally made him buck his hips, his cock much deeper inside you now, and you let out a gasp that turned into a moan as your body instinctively bucked towards his.

Diavolo slowly began to pull back, pumping into you slowly at half-length, he used one hand to pinch and roll your clit between two fingers, making you wetter than you already were. You reached for him, and he blushed and leaned into you, finally ramming his hips into yours. You threw your head back and instantly came again much to his surprise. But he immediately gave you a playful smirk that had you the shade of blood in embarrassment. You moved your hands to clutch his hair, and he focused seriously again, moving back and forth slowly, pumping in and out, mumbling about how tight you were until his pace and strength picked up enough to throw your body forward. You were held against his hips as you and the bed shook with every thrust, the bed frame beginning to hit the wall loudly enough to echo down the halls. He spread your legs further apart, reaching deeper inside as he grunted and moaned, slamming his cock in and out of you as your body contorted in the sheets, nails digging into his head. Unable to properly grip his hair, your hands moved to his horns and kept them there.

You could feel the small barbs of his dick as they sent you to heaven and back, you could feel every vein as he pulsed inside you.

Your vision blurred for a moment as you screamed his name, unable to control yourself. Hips bucking together hard enough to bruise and break, you were a wailing mess beneath him. His movements became sloppy, and when he watched your face twist in pleasure as you came again, his delight sent him over the edge, and with one final buck of his hips you gasped for air as the barbs stopping scratching, and he slowly pulled out, condom overflowing with his semen.

You both paused a moment, breathing frantic and held each other's gaze. Diavolo reverted to his human form and crawled next to you, laying on his chest, hugging his pillow as he watched your pink face struggling to breathe. Your cheeks were stained with tears and your hair more tangled than a bird’s nest as your chest heaved, taking in as much air as it could while you came down from your high.

He chuckled as he watched you, unsure of what to say. He'd just completely broken his composure, he'd ignored his title and interfered in his own exchange program just to get a taste of you. But he still wanted more of you. He ran his hand through your loose strands of hair and moved them out of your face. He sat up and threw the sheets off his bed, leaving you exposed again. You struggled to sit up but fell back into the bed. He helped you up and carried you in his arms to his private bathroom. He sat you underneath the showerhead and left the room to get something. He came back with your folded clothes and sat them on the sink next to his.

"My hair and make up," you mumbled, and he laughed.

"That's an easy fix, dear," he soothed you and turned the warm water on as he joined you in the shower, washing off the sweat and everything else. He admired the bruises and bites he'd left on your skin and helped you stand up, leaning into his chest, he held your hips as you were unable to stand on your own.

You felt the water run over you, and Diavolo comb his fingers through your matted hair. You were both silent, not sure what to say.

"So..." you trailed off, hoping it'd prompt him to speak.

"So..." he replied, taking a moment to think of what to say next.

"Did you enjoy yourself," he asked, already knowing the answer but wanted to hear it from you as you nodded shyly in agreement.

"Ye-yes," you stammered, and he hugged you closer as he ran a bar of soap over your arms.

"Good, we should do this again soon," he added, and you jumped in surprise.

Really? Lord Diavolo, your crush, a future demon king, wanted to have sex with you?

"Really?"

"Yes....But can we agree on one thing," he asked as you finished washing.

"Yes?"

"Lucifer can never find out."

You both laughed and nodded before sweating at the idea of what he'd do to you both. Diavolo rubbed your back and helped you to the sink where you dried off, and he used a spell to redo your hair and makeup as it was, though he didn't bother hiding the marks he left on you.

You both returned to the party a few minutes before he was to make his entrance, but when people asked for you to dance, you had to decline even though Mammon seemed depressed at rejection. This was only because you'd done enough dancing that night. Just not the kind of dancing anyone expected.

[rivangel]

PLEASE write about Levi’s mental state, i’m begging you

He’s faced death and precarious situations since he was born, yet he’s still standing strong and hopeful, WHAT THE HELL I LOVE MY SHORT KING

IT'S FINALLY HERE😭im sorry anon i hope you're around to see this and if u are i hope i dont disappoint

the tone in this analysis is so weird because i kept getting caught between 'this is an apa paper no contractions, academic language, double spacing -' and 'this is a tumblr post about a fictional blorbo wtf r u on'

i also use some scientific language i try my best to explain but if this turns anyone off i don't blame them because im unhealthily obsessed

*i'm a third-year undergraduate psychology student w/ a concentration in psychopathology

tw/cw: discussion of childhood exposure to sex (not assault)

Foreword

I’ve been putting this off for a while (I’m forgetful and this topic is intimidating what can I say), but being a year out from graduating with my bachelor’s to become a mental health professional, and being a Levi scholar(/hj), I wanted to give this a shot. 

I wanted to dissect and examine Levi Ackerman’s mental health “currently” (as in general canon), and explain as thoroughly but as simply as possible how and why he thinks and acts the way he does.

Seeing how AOT is pretty renowned for leaving out the ‘insignificant’ details, especially character details, a good majority of my assertions and even details of his life are built off of correlations and “signs and symptoms”; meaning some things could be an aspect of Levi’s personality, or a symptom of psychopathology. 

 I will examine his childhood (especially his childhood), adolescence, young adulthood, and “present�� adulthood, with a short summary at the end of where he might be mentally after the war.

*Lastly, I don’t like it when things I say about a series or character are taken as fact or make it implied that someone else’s thoughts are “wrong”. This is partly built on headcanons anyway, which are influenced by my own experiences. Don’t take away from this that this is me telling you what to think.*

Childhood

The most important period of development occurs in infancy and childhood, especially from the ages of 3-6. This is when a child learns where to find security, love, and basic skills, gaining stability as they develop.

Well, Kuchel died when Levi was 4.

Maternal Love / Learning Empathy / Anxious Attachment Style

Levi was born into deep poverty within a violent unwelcoming environment. Basic physical needs must have been very hard to meet (i.e., consistently fed enough, a clean environment, no physical threats). And where Levi was born is like the dictionary definition of a bad environment for a small child, excluding only his mother’s care and love.

As it’s generally understood in canon (and suggested from Levi’s special backstory manga so far) she was a caring parental figure early in Levi’s life that loved him unconditionally. We can conclude that Kuchel did everything within her power to compensate for both parenting Levi alone and shielding him the best she could from his horrible surroundings, teaching the kindness, goodness, and love that Levi would internalize and go on to strive for for his entire life. 

As far as we know, no other children lived in the brothel. Socialization is just as important for a young child as receiving love. With this isolation, it’s extremely difficult to learn how to connect to other people, or pick up on social cues. Levi would’ve never learned how to interact properly with his peers—aside from use of aggression and violence which Kenny would go on to instill in him.

With the danger/anxiety imposed by strangers, mostly if not entirely men, he would turn to his mother for comfort all. The. Time. 

And she would give him that support and affection of course. This early motherly affection is integral to child development: a child who receives empathy and affection is subliminally taught how to feel and express empathy towards others. 

While Levi’s surroundings were dangerous, lonely, and chaotic—traumatizing enough for a toddler or young child—Kuchel provided a safety net from that, so I think that Levi developed an anxious attachment as a child: exhibiting clinginess, excessive fear of abandonment, and an excessive need for security and/or reassurance.

Paternal Trauma / Potential Androphobia

Born and living in a brothel, we can assume that Levi was probably seen as a burden and a mistake by others, especially by men (both the likely majority of her customers and her boss).

AOT ch69; Before the Fall, ch34

This is likely in contrast to the women (those living and working in the brothel like Kuchel). They should know Kuchel if not as friends, then acquaintances who could empathize for her and her son. 

There’s an obvious trend here. If Levi is going to feel fear/danger/anxiety because of men, he should have a general aversion to men and-or the behavior of men who he encountered as a child. This is impossible to know for sure or in meaningful detail, but it seemed to be resolved by the time he became an adult if so.

Although Kenny in his words was no more than Levi's teacher, Levi did see him as a father figure.

The subject of Kenny will be expanded on later, but it's clear Kenny in no way resembled a father, who also would go on to abandon Levi (at the age of 11 or so). Children without father figures tend to struggle more emotionally, psychologically, and socially. Specifically, (especially boys) tend to exhibit intimidating/aggressive personas to compensate for resentment, fear, and unhappiness. 

Sexual Trauma (Tangent, Probably)

This is unconfirmed but a likely trauma Levi went through: exposure to sex as a child. There’s no way to confirm what he experienced, so I’ll function on ‘probably’s’ and ‘most likely’s’. 

Because Levi and Kuchel only lived in one room, other rooms in the brothel should have belonged to other women, and he was at the oldest four, I wager that he was babysat by women who Kuchel knew and/or was made to hide somewhere while she worked, such as in a cabinet.

(for reference)

AOT ch69

The odds are high that he was exposed to the aftermath of sexual violence (i.e., marks seen on his mother), and the sound or smells that have to do with it. That young, he wouldn’t know what it was, but he should have realized later as an adolescent.

In general, children regardless of gender exposed to sexual content usually experience early puberty (which is just as likely for impoverished children, or children who experience chronic high-stress in general); issues with intimacy; become desensitized to high-risk behavior; negative/inaccurate expectations about sex and relationships in the future; influence inappropriate behavior with other children or adults; sex addiction.

This is especially relevant to Levi’s fear of closeness/intimacy in the future. Exposure to sexual situations—possibly not including CSA in his case—very early in life inflicts on a child emotions and stress they don’t have the intellect or reasoning to process or understand. An extreme aversion to interpersonal relationships, especially physical ones, results.

This stress Levi must have felt, being powerless to this happening to his mother, is a different beast. Children aren’t capable of handling high levels of stress, and so the brain will automatically create coping mechanisms: dissociation (a severe form of “zoning out”; observing the self “from the third person”; numbness; the feeling of living in a dream), excessive daydreaming/overactive imagination, symptoms of PTSD (nightmares and terrors; flashbacks; spontaneous activation of fight-flight-freeze associated with anxiety; excessive worrying/fear; loneliness/self isolation). PTSD will also be prevalent in Levi’s later life, which I’ll delve into later.

Inappropriate behavior and sex addiction are also highlights for me because they shouldn’t exist in him based on Levi's personality and behavior throughout the series. In my opinion, Levi ought to associate sex with pain, shame, and violence; he does see it as an ordinary job—a means to an end. He should be desensitized to sex as a concept, but associates it personally with shame, sadness, and pain, possibly feeling disgust towards it. So it is highly likely that Levi in every stage of life following this experienced sexual repulsion (usually associated with high anxiety towards sex), a low libido, or a lack of sexual desire entirely. 

From a trauma perspective, he could avoid sexual topics of conversation, sexual settings (i.e., brothels), or an array of things which are sexually suggestive or he as a child possibly associated with sex (i.e., cleavage, panties, specific touch). Similarly, he might avoid direct reminders or have a post-traumatic reaction to them, such as anxiety or flashbacks (i.e., the sound of a bed creaking, the sight of wet clothes).

Importantly, it can be concluded that sexual violence was often exhibited, and the idea would be ingrained in him that sex, like everything else besides his relationship with his mother, is “give-and-take”, “victim-and-attacker”, and learn to be repulsed by intimacy. This impacts his willingness for later friendships and relationships as we’ll see later. 

Early Abandonment & Early Exposure to Death

As Kuchel’s health deteriorated, Levi’s sense of security would break down. Availability of shelter, food, and emotional support would be even less secure than before. He might have been providing for Kuchel for some time, even, as it can be gathered that he received little to no help from those around him while she was sick. To whatever length he had to take responsibility and both fear for Kuchel, this would cement a sense of responsibility and guilt in him from the age of just four years old.

He will fail to save her—regardless of the fact that that’s not his responsibility in the first place; a child wouldn’t understand that—and then lose her with nothing he could do to even cushion the blow.

How powerless he must’ve felt. How hopeless. How likely is it that Levi found comfort in joining her? A child his age wouldn’t be able to comprehend death, basing our understanding on Piaget’s theory of cognitive development. To summarize, at the age of six or seven, children aren’t capable of complex, abstract thought like death or the finality of it. But Levi had to learn early. 

AOT ch69

This will be center in his “clean-freak” tendencies later.

Adolescence

Most of this section is going to be rather vague again, but we already got the bulk of that over with in childhood!

Emotional Train Wreck / Lack of Identity 

It’s hard to notice if you’re not paying attention, but in every scene we’re shown with Levi after his mother dies but before Kenny leaves, he’s wearing some variation of his mother’s one dress styled into a shirt. He loves her endlessly, even or especially in death. And part of cherishing her memory, to him, should’ve been taking after her as much as he could.

That’s how to explain why he didn’t become a cruel person (Kenny for instance) as he grew into a teenager, even though much of Levi’s outlook and behaviors come from him (ch57).

The more pertinent question is how extreme violence, reinforcement of the idea that that violence is power, and Kenny’s total (or most likely total) lack of communicated emotional connection affected him.

Levi would still desperately want that connection deep down, especially with his mother gone. This is a major reason why Levi sought to get stronger to please Kenny. For chronically abandoned people, that continues into adulthood and even beyond. A hole inside which can't be filled.

AOT ch69

Chronic loneliness—like I explained before—basically explains his aloof nature and awkward disposition. It’s not that Levi feels as detached as he looks, but he doesn’t know how to express himself or open up. He wouldn’t learn how to process his emotions, let alone talk about them. He’s basically emotionally stunted and immature in impersonal relationships (between friends and especially in regards to intimacy).

The Underground’s environment also makes him socially awkward, rude, of course stoic/not very expressive, and blunt. Levi was forced to become extremely observant of people to suss out their intentions, remaining vigilant of his surroundings at all times.

Levi doesn’t even get affection in any sense anymore. He doesn’t get a hug or a pat on the back, and he certainly doesn’t get a shoulder to cry on.

If anything, Kenny would punish him for showing weakness. Vulnerability is weakness; weakness is death.

What results is a continuous and boundless sense of emptiness inside that can’t be filled. He’s plagued by a chronic sense of unbelonging and loneliness. There’s no time or opportunity to develop “normally” as an adolescent. Socialization is limited at best; thinking of his place in the world is irrelevant when his one and only most pressing goal is survival; he doesn’t get to explore hobbies or interests.

OCD Propensity

One “interest” Levi is passionate about is cleaning, at least. Disease is what caused his mother to die. The easiest cause to point to would be their disgusting surroundings (although, Kuchel was infected by a customer). It is canon that Levi’s love of cleaning comes from "his personal experiences". In that interview, Levi first specifically references the important of fighting disease.

In other words, his "clean freak" nature comes, primarily, from the death of his mother: Filth -> disease -> death, and abandonment by extension.

His mother would’ve encouraged him to keep their room clean. There were times he or she had to have come down with something and dirtiness was the cause. On top of Kenny’s enforcement to keep up “clean” appearances to garner respect from everyone else in the Underground. 

This in particular is extremely relevant to his mental health. When someone feels out of control of what is happening to them, especially in a recurring way, and especially as a child who doesn't yet know how to feel stable in an unstable environment, they look for something to control. It can be weight, bodily functions (blinking, breathing, etc), dominance over others, or cleaning, for instance.

Fear of disease, the urgent need to have control, and the basic need for stability makes it obvious that Levi would become obsessed with cleaning. And moreover, developing OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder). I’ll go deeper into this diagnosis later.

Lack of Self Worth

Despite the acknowledgment throughout canon that he trusts in his own strength, it wasn’t always that way.

Canonically, Levi sought praise from Kenny by showing his strength because that was the only thing he received praise for. The conclusion Levi came to once Kenny left him was that he wasn’t strong enough (wasn’t good enough) to warrant staying with him.

In conjunction, Levi’s first conclusion was that he did something wrong, not that Kenny possibly had some obligation that forced him to leave the Underground, pointing again to his own lack of self-worth.

This scenario created a complex in him, the very root cause of Levi’s pain, the very foundation of what Levi would go on to prioritize in adulthood. If he isn’t useful to those he wants not to abandon him, he’s worthless. He’s only useful when he shows his strength. Every other aspect of him like his interests is either irrelevant or bland by default in his eyes.

He would go on to make it his mission to try his best to be good enough in order to save and protect the lives of others, but foremost those he cares about.

Young Adulthood

Our first exposure to Levi as an adult is in A Choice with No Regrets, his OVA/backstory.

(By the way, I’ll be basing this analysis off a mix of the manga and the OVA.)

Emotional Immaturity/Affective Dysregulation

Generally, Levi’s defining negative character trait as a young adult is his emotional immaturity/anti-social behavior. Yes he’s grumpy and rude which is always indicative of him, but he’s very quick to anger, too. He cursed at the Squad Leader who offended him (by assuming that because he, Isabel, and Farlan are from the Underground, they’d be dirty), and argued furiously with Farlan that he would kill Erwin—not because it was required for the job, but because he disrespected him—for a few examples. 

ACWNR ch2

He tended to be arrogant, too. Such as when he ultimately called a Scout who had experience with the Titans stupid for telling Levi to hold his swords in a certain way. He spoke to every officer the same as he would anyone on the street, having a remarkable lack of basic respect for authority. He was insistent on distancing himself from the entire setting and structure of the Scouts as much as possible, both to not get attached, and he found their mission childish/foolish. 

He’s rather selfish. There is nothing Levi cares about genuinely more than Isabel’s and Farlan’s lives and the job that will set them up with a good future. Farlan’s advice is the only one’s he takes and the only judgment outside himself that he considers, such as when Farlan asks him to not cause trouble with authority to keep a low profile, but even then he acts stubborn. Levi trusts nobody wholeheartedly except himself (until later in ACWNR).

There’s a cognitive dissonance in him. Growing up, and still as a young adult, Levi’s headspace is marked by fear and uncertainty, with his power as his source of confidence. The first time he kills a Titan (with Isabel and Farlan), he uses too much gas because he refuses to potentially risk his friends’ lives; when the expedition is upcoming, he abruptly tells Farlan and Isabel to find a reason to stay back, and that he’ll complete the dangerous part of the job on his own. 

Levi is full of repressed fear and uncertainty. He hides and/or buries all of it for the sake of self-preservation both emotionally and physically.

Antisocial Personality…?

It’s extremely interesting how a character as selfless, heroic, and empathetic as Levi exhibits antisocial symptoms. I’d even argue that if his childhood was spent entirely without his mother figure, then he might be a dictionary definition of ASPD (Antisocial Personality Disorder).

People with this disorder live day-to-day under the constant assumption that whoever is around them is “out to get them”/searching for a weakness to exploit. Humanity is made up of only prey and predators; morals are completely subjective, perpetuated by the society that surrounds them. This constant need to defend oneself, the effect of the exact trauma the potential sociopath experienced, combined with a muted emotional spectrum, results in a complete disregard of everything, including people outside of themself. They might believe they’re entitled to comfort or admiration, but overall, they’re intensely self-serving, often aggressive, and ruthless. 

Because Levi for instance learned to rely on violence both for “love” and survival, then he might fall on violence to manipulate a person or situation into serving himself. I see reason to believe that Levi could have grown into worse than Kenny’s image if it weren’t for his mother’s influence.

However, the greatest cause for deniability is Levi’s wide emotional spectrum (especially including empathy and shame), while a lack of shame is the most significant marker of ASPD . (It is arguably one of many testaments to his strength that a victim of so much suffering, violence, and cruelty could become a man as empathetic as him.) 

However, these tendencies may still be relevant: A sense of arrogance—both to the way Levi thinks of some who he perceives as weak and live without good morals—lacking issue with using deceit or violence to attain a goal, and living outside the rule of authority.

I go into more detail about this idea here.

Conclusion

As is true in general, there’s very little to say of mental development once someone has reached their early–mid-twenties. What we know of Levi’s young adulthood does reinforce his fear of abandonment, but he finds a cause where his strength and compassion can be “put to good use” and give to him a life that is worth living.

Conclusion: the ‘Present’/Diagnoses Overview

C-PTSD (Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder)

Levi’s emotional dysregulation (i.e., inability to sit with and process negative emotions), his difficulties in relationships, insomnia, negative worldview, absent sense of self, and finally, his persistent sense of unworthiness/worthlessness are all indicative of C-PTSD. It’s distinct from PTSD in that he didn’t endure one short-term traumatizing event, but he grew up surrounded by trauma and saw it as normal (e.g., gang violence, extreme poverty, death of a parent, (more presumably) physically and emotionally abusive parental figure). Levi as a child developed no understanding of a nurturing, secure environment. 

Negative/Absent Sense of Self

I’ve talked about this at length already, but it’s worth noting how Levi’s perception of himself must have changed when it was revealed that he is extremely strong physically not from his own efforts as much, but because he’s an Ackerman. 

His self-confidence and self-worth have always been built on the foundation of his strength. He’s useful if he’s strong, so he’s worthy if he’s strong. Along with the extreme high pressure his goal to kill Zeke put on him in season four, he might have gone to extreme measures to compensate for his strength he might have felt was “unearned” (such as excessive exercise for example). This is an aside, but it was a blow to him for sure.

Emotional Dysregulation

The causes of emotional dysregulation generally which he experienced are as follows: early childhood trauma, feelings ignored, judged, or invalidated at a young age, and physical and emotional child neglect. Beyond his first four years of life with his mother, Levi experienced all these things (early exposure to sex and likely exposure to domestic violence aside). 

It’s important to focus on emotional neglect specifically, when any and all perceived “weakness”, no matter how small, is unacceptable to Levi. He will never ask for help (being independent to a fault), he can’t define or process his emotions, and it doesn’t occur to him—and it could be a shock—when he learns that his friends care about him, not him insofar as how useful he is. 

As an adult, Levi appears to be emotionally mature, but I argue that this isn’t the case. It’s more accurate to say that he has better control over his emotions (in that he buries them or ignores them) with a mature outlook because of all his experiences with suffering.

Similarly, he’s not outwardly emotional not because he’s antisocial (as related to ASPD, not introversion), but because he’s so “emotionally constipated” that he’s numbed the vast majority of the time.

Relationship Issues + Fear of Abandonment

Because of his fear of abandonment and impaired emotional intelligence in close relational conflict, he’s extremely passive and/or passive aggressive. In order to avoid potential abandonment, he doesn’t go out of his way to win major arguments—such as threatening to break Erwin’s legs if he didn’t stay away from the expedition in season three, but ultimately giving in. He’s also more likely to sneak petty insults into arguments, give “silent treatment”, slam doors, etc. His kindness and exceptional empathy shouldn’t let him be physically or overly violent.

These are likely additions to why Levi doesn’t foster many close relationships.

Fittingly, as a child I thought that Levi might have had an anxious attachment style (clingy, excessive need for security), but as this possibility for security was removed entirely, and he was taught to not rely on others, he would develop more of an overt avoidant attachment in adulthood in combination (fearful-avoidant): making very few emotional demands—even though he has needs—withdrawing when there’s conflict, acting aloof yet fearing abandonment, having difficulty expressing emotions he feels intensely, and fear of depending on someone else.

Anxiety

His cool-headedness even in the heat of battle/war (other factors like experience aside) is exactly what you would expect from someone diagnosed with C-PTSD; he’s accustomed to chronic high-stress. But small stressors (i.e., a change of plans) are overwhelming and make him quick to anger/excessive annoyance.

OCD

Emotional dysregulation is also closely associated with OCD.

OCD is much much more than being concerned with keeping clean or organized. OCD is an anxiety disorder composed of anxiety-related obsessions and compulsions, such as frequent and disturbing thoughts or images (intrusive thoughts). These attempt to be managed through rituals (i.e., handwashing, counting in patterns). Although symptoms will fluctuate with anxiety, OCD at its baseline is a distressing disorder.

Since he was young, Levi should have had an incessant need to be in control at all times. A shining example of this is his mother’s death, an incident he couldn’t control but included dirtiness/disease as a cause he could pinpoint, so this anxiety with dirtiness becomes a major obsession, and the compulsion is cleaning. (Putting aside the fact that Levi enjoys cleaning by itself too.)

It’s a widely-held belief that if Levi has OCD, it’s contamination OCD, as it specifically has to do with an obsession with dirtiness and a compulsion in cleaning (i.e., damaging handwashing, ritualized bathing that may take hours). However, based on the multitude of times Levi was covered in blood and remained unbothered by it (Titan and human), and in fact the obsession’s lack of relevance entirely during urgent missions/situations, contamination OCD is simply not plausible. Instead, it’s general OCD.

There’s no way to know for sure, but I don’t see his OCD as mild or severe. Levi is an extremely orderly and balanced person, so it can be concluded he must have things done a certain way, routinely, organizational, or planned; when the dirtiness is “negative” (i.e., Titan blood, blood on a knife he used to kill Isabel’s attackers), he is never more rigid with cleanliness; it’s probable he suffers intrusive thoughts (likely of the violent nature), a fear of contamination, and/or counting ritualistically, but the most obvious compulsion is cleaning. He might have sensory issues, such as disgust if he happens to brush shoulders with a stranger; aversion to particularly bright lights, irrational rage towards “mouth sounds” (i.e., chewing, coughing, swallowing), etc.

EDNOS (Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified)

Levi should have a complicated relationship with food to say the least. 

In the realm of eating disorders, EDNOS is sort of a catch-all term when an individual doesn’t qualify for the diagnostic criteria of anorexia or bulimia, and it encompasses lesser-known eating disorders like Pica. It’s the most common diagnosis for clinical eating disorders.

I already covered how integral the early years of life are, and beginning at a young age, if children aren’t given a basic need like food, and they must seek out food on their own, it becomes an anxiety deeply rooted in the brain regardless of how well-fed they are when they’re older. There will always be an urge to have food available. Levi’s years in the Underground were spent either actively starving, or going about every single day having acquiring food as top priority. He was a young adult when he left, so it’s impossible to unlearn this (without extensive therapy, which Levi doesn’t seek). It’s similar to compulsions found in OCD: even though he logically knows that there will be a dinner after lunch, it’s impossible to put aside this worry. 

That may mean always having food stashed, eating too much—especially in his early years Aboveground when he’d eat as much food in a day than he’d eat in a week Underground— stealing food, or eating way too quickly (as someone who lived in a place where food was considered something of a luxury resource and threatened being stolen at any time).

The latter factor contributes to Levi’s suggested preference to only eat alone—joining the fact that Levi only eats with Erwin after expeditions. Eating in front of others should be considered a weakness to him.

As time passes with this easy access to food, combined with his extremely narrow sense of what makes him “good enough”, his relationship with eating may become toxic. Especially when the stakes of his worthiness are so high—literally life and death. He may think that he’s privileged to eat at all, and when he feels worthless, he restricts himself from that “privilege”. 

He may be so accustomed to the feeling of hunger, that it doesn’t immediately register with his mind when he is hungry.

Lastly, he may have a generally low appetite. This is often associated with depression, but depression is comorbid with C-PTSD.

Misc.

Some tangents/miscellaneous speculation about Levi’s psychology:

Queer?

Sexuality is formed and shifts due to a wide variety of factors, which most if not all are terribly understudied: genetics, hormones, and your environment/experiences. So again, my speculation.

With his fear of close relationships and negative experiences with sex, I think he should land somewhere on the queer spectrum, specifically under the asexual or aromantic umbrella (i.e., pansexuality/being panromantic (attraction to personality) and demisexuality/being demiromantic (attraction only to those he has an emotional connection to)).

MDD

The odds of Levi having MDD (major depressive disorder/clinical depression) are iffy. Most if not all of the symptoms are comorbid with childhood trauma and C-PTSD: Such as persistent apathy, guilt, and/or discontent; sleeping too much or too little; lack of energy; reduced or heightened appetite; irritability. 

Oftentimes, depression, C-/PTSD, and related mental illnesses cause unexplained physical pain, such as back pain and occasional tension headaches. “Stress hormones” like adrenaline are built-up in the body, and usually persist without physical therapy and-or medication (Disclaimer this mention is based on nothing more than Levi always standing with at least one hand on his hip).

Body Language

Similar can be said of his body language from a cognitive perspective. The vast majority of the time, Levi has himself closed-off in some way, usually by crossing his arms to protect his chest; a subconscious barrier between oneself and another person.

Also see this official art of Levi asleep.

Afterword

We’ve known it’s not just Levi’s physical strength and skill that makes him the strongest, right? It should take immense mental strength to make it day-by-day dealing with the trauma and issues that he does, but not only has he survived and continues to, but he lives heroically, selflessly, with the wellbeing of everyone around him as a top priority. He buries all of his pain by moving forward always and without exception regardless of how painful the present is. Living with “no regrets” should in mental respects be a guise for pushing his trauma down, too; there’s just no words that can properly do Levi’s resilience justice.

Part of me wants to go into detail about his later adulthood, but given how very little we know (right now), I think it’d be too speculative.

However, based on what we have seen at the ending of AOT, it’s comforting to know and plain to see that Levi wasn’t defeated when he “lost” the reason to be so strong, and even his strength itself; he didn’t lose his love for his friends nor of life. 

In middle age, based on Erikson’s psychosocial stages, the conflict that should enter Levi’s life is the idea of generativity versus stagnation. He seems satisfied with his life despite the negative effects of all he went through—grief, physical disability, inevitable mental scarring—and he’s still concerned with helping others, especially the younger generation in a world after the overwhelming devastation that was the Rumbling.

My speculated psychopathologies/diagnoses of Levi:

C-PTSD (insomnia prevalent)

OCD (contamination obsessions)

EDNOS

[auclairedetoru]

Hi bestie!! I’m not sure if this is where I request things since I’ve never done this before😓🙏

But could you perhaps rights something about Levi?? And reader who were engaged and moved in together but ultimately ended up breaking up their engagement due to spending less time together because of work (Levi) and school( med school reader)???? But then after a few years they run into each other???

I’m jot sure if this makes sense, but If you consider thank you you’re amazing and I LOVE your writing 🥰🫶

Hi noonie~ Timeline might not make sense because I'm too lazy to create an understandable and logical one but this is fiction and in the words of Barbie, anything is possible.

Also, Levi has both parents in this fic because he's already suffered enough in his original story, he deserves a stable home life in this.

Levi prides himself on living with no regrets. No matter what happens, what he chooses to do, he considers it all part of his development and growth. Have some of the choices resulted in situations he didn't want to be in? Of course, but he still won't regret them, because he learned from them and changed.

But he does regret one thing.

See, back in his early 20s, Levi was in a relationship, which comes to a shock to many of the people he met later in life because he's always been single and not interested, but yes, he was not only dating but engaged to a beauty girl named y/n.

They started dating in college after a mutual friend set them up. Levi didn't want to date anyone at first, but then he saw her and immediately was drawn to her. She was so pretty, so kind, and so gentle, so he wasn't surprised when he learned that she was a med student hoping to become a pediatrician.

Things developed quickly between them. She moved in after 4 months and on their first anniversary, Levi proposed to her and of course she said yes. His mother was worried for them when he broke the news to her, everything happened too fast and she warned him that it might lead to problems in the future, and that's the only thing he regrets.

He should've listened to his mother.

Being older and not studying the same thing, Levi got to graduate earlier than her, and because of his qualifications he was quick to find a job that paid him well enough to live comfortably with his fiancée. The first couple of months were perfect, they were both happy and content with their lives, but slowly and without realising it, they started to drift apart, too busy focusing on work and school.

At one point, the only time they were together was in bed while sleeping. They were barely seeing each other, let alone talking. She eventually confronted him about it, but with the exhaustion and lack of communication, their conversation quickly turned into an argument, and instead of solving the problem they went to bed angry at each other. One night turned into two, two into three, three into a week, a week into a month... They weren't surprised when they finally sat down to talk again and it resulted in a break up.

They were each other's first stable relationship and couldn't imagine a life without the other so the fact they did not want to end it is understandable, but they both knew it was not healthy for them to stay together. Levi cried when she handed him her engagement ring and he refused to take it, telling her that it will always be hers no matter what. Her final wish as she was about to leave their once shared apartment was to have one last kiss, so he planted a small one on her forehead and told her that he'll find her again, if not in this life then he'll look for her in the next one.

Fast forward to now, Levi left his first job. After working there for a year, he realised they were using him to do work outside of his requirements knowing he was a newbie who's too afraid to say no, that's why he was working overtime and even at home. His current job is much better, they pay him more than the previous one and he already got a promotion. He made new friends and feels like he's in a better place in life now.

Well, except his relationship status.

He tried to go on dates, to meet new people, but he always found himself comparing them to y/n which wasn't fair at all, especially since in his eyes everything she did was nothing less than perfect. So for now, he has settled on being single, hoping he'll meet the one eventually.

He thinks about y/n a lot. She must be graduating soon. He hopes she went through with becoming a pediatrician, it's always been her dream and he couldn't think of a better person to take care of tiny and vulnerable humans than her. He wants to check on her, and he tried before, but she must've changed her phone number because an old man picked up last time he tried (and he unfortunately got an earful of cuss words that he didn't even know existed).

Levi remembers promising her the best graduation party to celebrate the successful end of years of hard work, the memory is still very vivid in his brain.

“... I'll fill the whole place with all your favourite foods. All your family and friends will be there-”

“Your parents need to be there too!”

“You want to invite them?”

“Of course! I love them more than you!”

“hey-”

He really regrets not listening to his mother when she told him not to rush things. He wonders how things would've turned out if they didn't move in together and got engaged in a matter of a year. Would they have been okay with not talking often with each other? Would they have argued the way they did? Would their relationship have lasted longer than it did?

Sigh... He misses her so much. To the point he started seeing things and they somehow remind him of her. Whether it's food, clothes, and even decor, he finds himself thinking about how she would've reacted to them.

He wishes he could see and talk to her again. He was so privileged when they were together and he didn't even realise that. Getting to look at her beautiful face everyday, hear her voice, hear her laugh, watch her do normal every day things, they all seemed so simple at the moment, but they went on to become things he's wishing to have around again.

... And somehow his wishes are heard.

“Levi ?”

He thinks he's hallucinating at first. He's missed her so much his brain has started making him hear things to cope. But then he turns around and there she is, looking as beautiful as the day he last saw her.

“Oh my god, it's been so long,” she smiles as she slowly approaches him. Levi could cry at the simple sight of her, and he's the type of person who's always in control when it comes to his emotions, but not when it comes to her, though.

“Y/n... Hi, how's it going?”

“Oh, you know, just preparing for last minute things before graduation next week.”

The sweet sound of her nonchalant laugh is like drinking a nice cold cup of water on a hot summer day. He wishes he could have a recording of it and listen to it whenever he needs to.

“Right, congratulations in advance.”

“Thank you! Here, actually,” she reaches inside her bag and pulls out an envelope of sorts, “an invitation to attend the ceremony and everything. I was supposed to give it to a friend but they unfortunately can't make it, I'd love for you to come, though.”

A small, nearly invisible smile is drawn on his lips, one that he knows only she can spot. He gently takes the envelope from her hands and that's when he sees it, her engagement ring wrapped so beautifully around her right ring finger instead of her left. The sight of it makes his heart skip several beats. Does that mean she still thinks about him? About their relationship? Does she miss him the way he misses? Does she wish things would've been different? He wants to ask her all those questions, but he feels like they're too inappropriate. After all, this is the first time they've seen each other in years.

“I'll make sure to be there for you.”

She smiles back at him, her cheeks burning at his choice of words as she looks down shyly and Levi is satisfied knowing he still has that effect on her, “bring your parents as well, you know how much I've wanted them to attend such an important day.”

Levi chuckles lightly but nods, “of course, they wouldn't miss it for the world.”

After saying goodbye (which they honestly both didn't want to do), he looks back down at the invite to her graduation on top of the forgotten bottle of shampoo he was reading, and he feels very happy when he sees that she did in fact go through with becoming a pediatrician. He'll definitely attend, and he'll bring his parents too, just as it always has been planned.

A laugh escapes his lips as he remembers the day they broke up when he promised her he'll find her again.

“Not if I find you first.”

She was right... She did find him first.

Struggled a lot with this one, had to rewrite it multiple times because for some reason it wouldn't save 😭

[emberfrostlovesloki]

Teacher's Pet [Aaron x Reader]

Photo credits: Left (@littlecarmine) Center (@penandpaper-love) Right (@f4iryesss)

Prompt: When the reader, Jack’s teacher gets injured during the school day keeping her students safe, Aaron goes to check on her that evening. The unlikely pair get closer, but it's up to both of them if they want to make whatever they have more. 

Pairing: Aaron x Non-BAU!reader, teacher!reader,  ally!reader. The reader uses she/her pronouns

Category: hurt/comfort 

Word Count: 12K

Content Warnings: Homophobic phrases [from anti-LGBTQ+ protesters (the bad guys)], brief mention of religion, mention of being hit in the face and body and a split lip (reader) distress, mention of food and drinking alcohol, mention of an accident [not specified what (reader)], Haley’s death is brought up. If I missed any, please let me know. 

A/N: Hi all! I hope you are all doing very well! This fic is for amazing @imagining-in-the-margins's Pride writing challenge! I made up my own prompt for this one which is: The reader puts herself in danger to keep her students away from anti-LBGTQ+ protesters. Aaron finds out about this and makes sure she’s fine (aka protective Hotch.) I hope you like this more fluffy and cute style of fic. It’s a bit different from the angst I write. It takes me back to my early Aaron writing style! I want to note that I know that not all school districts deal with this kind of stuff, but as I live in the South, and my sister and I are both in Education, I get to hear about this kind of thing more often than I’d like. Anyhow, please be kind to yourselves this week and do something you love, you are so special. If you enjoy this fic, likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated! Love Levi - ❤️

List with all stories 

y/n = your name 

y/l/n = your last name 

a/r = age range 

a/d/r = any dietary restrictions (if none, please ignore) 

Aaron got the call from the school shortly after he’d finished an early lunch. He was seated at his desk, the soft glow of the lap lighting his space which was covered by the team’s files. He was going to do the boring parts of the files for them, as he always did, but his phone ringing had disrupted his workflow. He glanced at the caller ID and quickly picked up, saying, “This is Mr. Hotchner.” There was a brief pause before the woman on the phone said, “Good afternoon, Mr. Hotchner. This is Rachel Jenkins, the school receptionist.” Hotch nodded his head; he knew the woman well, as he had gone to the school multiple times this year already because Jack had gotten into some kind of trouble, or needed him. Rachel continued, stating “Sorry to disturb you during the work day, but there’s been an incident with Jack, and the nurse thinks it’s best that you come and pick him up as soon as possible.” Aaron stifled a sigh. He wasn’t angry at Jack. He didn’t blame him for acting out, a trait that had started once his son had started processing his mother’s death. The family counselor said that was a natural part of grieving for a child, and Aaron was sympathetic to his son’s pain and emotions. Sometimes he wanted to scream or lash out too, but he had more faculty over his emotions. Even with all that being said, Hotch did find it a bit troublesome that Jack got into scuffles on days that would have been easy for him. But that was neither here nor there, life, nor emotions waited for anyone’s schedule -- Aaron knew this like all parents did. 

Hotch asked a follow-up question: ���Was this Jack dealing with bullies, or was this him doing something he shouldn’t be?” Aaron liked to know these things heading into the Principal or Nurse’s office beforehand, so he could set his tone appropriately. There was a pause on the line which made Hotch nervous. The silence was broken as Jessica replied, “No, Mr. Hotchner, it’s not that. I… I think it’s best that you just come down to the school.” This response made Aaron even more tense. 

What could have happened that the woman would hesitate like that? He sensed that an answer had been on the tip of her tongue, and she’d stopped herself from speaking because she thought it was better. Hotch furrowed his brows, got out of his chair quickly, and grabbed his suit jacket. He flipped the screen of his laptop down, then grabbed his shoulder bag from the couch. No matter what Jack might have gotten up to, not knowing if something bad had happened to his son, nothing would stop him from getting to Jack. 

Hotch hurriedly locked his office door behind him and as he started striding toward the stairs that would get him to the elevators, Rossi exited his office and offered a quizzical look at his friend. It was unlike Aaron to flee the office, even on days that felt like they were drawing on for an eternity. Hotch beat Dave to the question forming on his lips, someone would need to know where he was in case something serious came up in his absence. “Jack had some trouble at school and they said I should head over there.” Rossi frowned and said, “The bullies again? Remember my offer of teaching Jack how to punch is still on the table.” The worried look on Aaron’s face prevented Dave from joking further. Hotch pinched the bridge of his nose and said, “I don’t think so, I hope to be back in a half hour or so. Look after the team while I’m gone, please?” 

Rossi nodded his head in understanding and watched as Aaron took the stairs quickly down to the bullpen and out of sight. Dave closed his eyes for a second. He knew things had been hard for Aaron and Jack after Haley. There was no avoiding the hurt that lingered like a shroud around the two of them. He knew that Hotch had done his best to help and support Jack, but that didn’t make Aaron’s pain any less. If anything it made it worse because the guilt still haunted Aaron like a spector. Jack’s anger had grown and manifested at anything that it could get its teeth into, and often its victim was Aaron, who was trying his best. Dave bowed his head and saw the grief with Aaron. Rossi knew grief, it had been his companion for many years. And it hurt to see it on Hotch, but there was little he could do but support Aaron to the best of his ability and let time do its healing. And healing was a slow seamstress. Dave looked over the bullpen at the team working and smiling and turned back to his office, he felt like he needed a drink, but for now, bitter coffee would have to do. 

Aaron drove at a speed that was technically street-legal. The churning of his stomach and the constant red lights had him worried and agitated at the same time. Jack’s school wasn’t too far away, but he’d hit the lunch-hour traffic which made the drive at least twenty-five minutes long. Hotch jacked up the air conditioner to silence his stressed-out thoughts. If something very bad had happened, then he would have been told. And there was nothing on the news, no lockdowns, or active shooter drills. However, sending Jack off to school every morning knowing that that was a possibility didn’t make him feel good. 

It was the fear of the unknown that made Aaron press his foot down on the accelerator further. Hotch arrived at the school and everything looked normal from the outside. With hurried footsteps, he made it to the front office to check in. Jessica could see how nervous he was and the intensity of his expression. Aaron’s eyes, when they were dark and worried, had opened many doors for him, and broken many unsubs in the interrogation room. The receptionist swallowed and said, “Just grab a visitor badge and you can head to the nurse’s office, Mr. Hotchner. I’ll sign you in. The Vice Principal is already there.” 

Aaron grabbed one of the laminated passes and said, “Thank you,” as he headed out of the glass office and toward the nurse’s office which was located at the end of the central hall adjacent to the janitor’s closet. Knowing the Vice-Principal was present with Jack told Aaron more information, but not enough to know exactly what had happened. If he found out that his son was being bullied again, he was going to send some strongly worded emails to those boy’s parent’s this evening. As he was drafting the letters in this mind, he made it to the nurse and opened the door. As soon as he saw Jack’s tear-stained face, and that he was clutching a Kleenex in his hands, Hotch stepped further in the door and the nurse and Vice Principal moved aside and let him go to his son. Aaron knelt next to the bed that Jack was sitting on and embraced him firmly. Jack let out some sniffles and Aaron reassured him before asking for any information, “It’s okay, Jack. It’s okay.” 

After a few moments, Hotch attempted to move away, but Jack’s hands gripped the fabric of his shirt. Aaron moved his right hand from Jack’s soft hair that reminded him of Haley to under Jack’s legs as he stood. Unamused at how he’d been kept waiting, Aaron asked in a cool tone, “Would you tell me what’s going on, Vice Principal Westbrook?” The silence that stayed in the room as the Vice Principal picked at the hangnails on his fingers and looked at the floor had Aaron hot under the collar. Jack didn’t look bruised or hurt in any way, just very upset. Upset enough that he had wanted him. Before Dr. Westbrook could come up with a scripted answer, Jack said, “They hurt her, Dad.” Aaron frowned, pulled Jack back from his chest a bit, and asked, “Hurt who, bud?” Jack sniffled and replied, “Ms. y/l/n. He punched her in the face and her shoulder.” The words tumbled out of the boy's mouth and only had Aaron more concerned. Jack was crying again, and Aaron handed him back his crumpled tissue and pressed Jack to his broad chest again. Jack set his head on his dad’s shoulder and took comfort in the solid presence and scent that was always there for him when he needed it. 

Jack had done a lot of growing up in his short years. He’d discovered a few things about life that he wished he hadn’t. How people you loved sometimes went away, maybe just for a bit, or sometimes forever, but that didn’t mean they weren’t still there loving him. His dad was a prime example of this -- and even if Jack couldn’t articulate this, or might change his mind later, it was still true in the moment. As his little fingers clutched at Aaron’s shirt collar, Hotch turned to face Dr. Westbrook again. 

The slim man seemed to be trying his hardest to avoid eye contact with Aaron, and giving a straight answer to anything, but Hotch wouldn’t let him get away with this. Ms. y/l/n was someone who had become very special to Jack this year when he got into her class. Aaron also had a kind of parasocial relationship with y/n, as she had been very helpful with Jack and dealing with his grief and the bullying he’d been dealing with that year. Jack had brought her up early in the year and when Aaron had met with Ms. y/l/n for the Meet-The-Teacher night, Hotch could tell why. She was so bright. Her presence illuminated her cozy room which she had decorated with bright posters and lights. It seemed even the sharp corners of the room were softened by y/n’s presence. She had given Jack such praise for his manners, his reading skills, and how he treated his classmates with kindness. Aaron had almost felt like a lost that night, as he could only listen and nod. He had to really pay attention when some of the other parents started asking questions. Apart from the fact that y/n was clearly an adept teacher and classroom manager for her age, she was also pretty. Pretty in a quaint way. He’d left the school that night feeling oddly lighter than he had in months. 

The next time they met was at the first parent-teacher conference. That was where Aaron had learned that Jack was dealing with bullies. The administration hadn’t even informed him of this issue. y/n was very kind about it and wanted to make sure that Aaron had the right support for something like this. y/n hadn’t meant to question his parenting skills, but as a single dad, she wanted to get a better feel of how emotions were handled around the Hotchner household. Not just sad feelings, but anger and resentment too. It wasn’t until a month later when the bullying had gotten really bad, that Aaron realized, thanks to y/n, that he wasn’t equipped to handle this alone and had brought in the help of a family counselor. He had more contact with y/n after that, as she checked up on Jack and kept Aaron informed about his son’s grades and other issues that popped up in the classroom. 

Hotch could understand why Jack would be upset that y/n had been hurt somehow. He was also angry, and asked in a firm voice, “What happened to Ms. y/l/n?” The VP sighed and said, “Well it was just an unfortunate situation, Mr. Hotchner, but no one was seriously hurt and we’re launching an investigation into the situation that happened.” This evasive answer didn’t satisfy Aaron and he replied, “Great, but what happened to Ms. y/l/n, and why is my son so distraught about it? What happened?” 

Dr. Westbrook realized that he couldn’t talk his way out of not answering Aaron as he had with the other parents he’d had to have had this conversation with. The man relented and said, “Well this morning a group of Anti-LGBTQ+ protesters amassed at the front of the school and held up degrading signs and shouted at anyone coming into the building through the front entrance.” Hotch already didn’t like where this was headed. The political climate had many up in arms due to the acceptance of others, and they made it their goal to try and complain and intimidate those who didn’t agree with them and their views. The VP continued, “Well they were blocking the flow of traffic and harassing the faculty, so we had some city police move them off campus. Unfortunately, they set up on DeGhatty Street on the sidewalk by the area for recess.” Hotch nodded, getting a better picture of what had happened. But there were still missing pieces. The next bit Dr. Westbrook rushed through, but Aaron caught the story even if the VP was trying to make it hard to. “Well it was the second shift of recess, the time that Jack has, and the protesters became more agitated. They weren’t getting the engagement they wanted, and they started yelling at the kids. Ms. y/l/n was on recess shift and tried calling the school’s two SROs, but they were dealing with an incident in the cafeteria. The screaming was distressing to some of the students and one student started moving toward the group by the fence…” 

Hotch stopped the man and asked, “Was it Jack?” The Vice Principal nodded his head no and replied, “No Mr. Hotchner. It was another student, but other monitors and students did say that your son was watching from a pretty close distance.” Hotch narrowed his eyes but didn’t detect that the man was lying. Dr. Westbrook swallowed thickly under Aaron’s gaze and shaky continued, “Well Ms. y/l/n saw the student moving toward the protesters, and she moved forward to cut the student off. The group was unhappy about that, and they accosted her and made some false statements and allegations about her. She did her best to verbally defend herself and move back to protect the students and get them all inside, but one of the men in the group, allegedly, grabbed her shoulder, screamed at her, and then lost his composure and hit Ms. y/l/n in the face and chest.”

The image that the man was painting made Aaron feel his anger flash up in him. Not only was the VP using protective language for the protesters, he, nor the school had done a proper job of protecting their students or teachers. No wonder Jack was distraught. Thinking of Jack, his son had settled and Aaron knew they would have to leave in a bit. This was still a school and there were other things that had to be done, but Aaron asked, “Are the protestors gone now? I drove down DeGhatty to get here, and I didn’t see anyone. Also, how is Ms. y/n? Is she alright?” 

Dr. Westbrook nodded and seemed relieved that the conversation had turned away from the events of that afternoon. He cleared his throat and straightened his blue striped tie which didn’t match his grey suit before replying, “The local police came down and dispersed the crowd and told them they didn’t have a right to protest on the school’s block without a permit, which is true. As for Ms. y/l/n, Nurse Patty here looked her over and we decided it was for the best to send her home for the day. Ms. y/l/n seemed shaken up.” Aaron refrained from letting out a long sigh. Now was not the time nor the place. But the feelings and questions that flooded Aaron were that he wondered why the police hadn’t been called earlier, why the school didn’t seem up on its legal code, and the utter condescension that came with having to send y/n home for the rest of the day. What did the Vice Principal expect from her after being punched in the face? y/n had “appeared shaken up?” How the hell would he have reacted in that circumstance? 

Aaron didn’t want any of this frustration at this situation to make Jack feel like he was angry at him, but he would have a conversation with his son later about when to step back in a situation. But he’d worry about that later. For now, Hotch said, “Okay. Thank you for explaining. May I take Jack home now?” Dr. Westbrook seemed to deflate and nodded his head yes. The nurse moved over to Jack and gave him a pat on the head and handed him a lollipop. The older woman said, “Have a good rest of your day, Jack. If you’re at school tomorrow and you feel bad at any time in the day you can come and see me, okay?” Jack nodded softly and Aaron shot her a thankful smile before tightening his grip on his son and moving out of the door and back toward the front office. Hotch quickly signed out with Jessica and returned his visitor badge to the counter. 

Once he was back out into the warm, almost, summer sun, Aaron dipped his head down to Jack's ear and said softly, “Hey, Buddy. Would you be okay with hanging you with Dad’s friends for a while while I work in the office? You could camp up with me or you could see Uncle Spencer, Uncle Morgan, or Aunt Penelope?” The prospect of seeing his friends had Jack perk up and his distress diminish as he said, “Hm-hm. I wanna see Aunt Penny and Uncle Derek.” Hotch smiled and replied, “Okay. We’ll just be there for a few hours and then, if you’re good, we can go to ice cream after Daddy’s done with work.” That last piece of information really made Jack happy, and Aaron relaxed for the first time since the school had called him. It didn’t take long for Aaron to get Jack strapped into his car seat and head back to the Quantico Field Office. 

Hotch spent the rest of the afternoon working and looking after Jack; mostly making sure Jack wasn’t getting into too much trouble with the team. Derek showed Jack around the bullpen, and Spencer did some physics magic which the whole BAU oohed and ahhed at, even Aaron and Rossi, from a distance. Then Penelope took Jack into her office and they spent around an hour together laughing and talking. There was something about Garcia’s energy that matched Jack’s so well, and his easily distracted self could be entertained for hours. Hotch made sure to set up a fancy coffee delivery for tomorrow morning for the team out of his pocket. He knew all of their orders by heart now. He did this as a thank you to the team. Not that any one of them would complain about having Jack distract them, however, being a babysitter was very much not in their job description, especially when they were in the office, so wanted to make sure they knew how appreciative he was of their support. Each one of them had been there for him and Jack on numerous occasions when Hotch thought that he couldn’t go on. He realized how lucky he was to be surrounded by this support system. Jack had them too, and also his friends and teachers at school. Ms. y/n came to mind as he finished scheduling the coffee order. The thought of someone laying hands on her gave him a constricting feeling in his chest. 

Aaron let out a breath and looked outside his windows into the bullpen where he watched Prentiss, Morgan, and JJ kneeling next to Jack who was speaking animatedly about what looked like soccer practice. Hotch moved his eyes back to his laptop screen and pulled up his personal email. With a few clicks of his fingers, he had gmail pulled up. He hit ‘new message.’ He typed in y/n’s email into the ‘to’ box. It felt so strange to be the one initiating a conversation, especially a new one, but he cared about Ms. y/n, and he knew his nerves wouldn’t settle down until he’d checked in on her. 

y/n was the one to normally start a conversation either to check up on Jack or let Hotch or Mr. Hotchner, as she called him, what had happened with Jack at school. Aaron had only once emailed y/n for details about Jack’s day when he’d come home upset about something that he couldn’t quite decipher. She responded promptly and told him everything she knew about the situation. Essentially they had only emailed in a professional capacity before, and this felt different. For a moment Aaron wondered if anyone else had called or messaged her. If her friends from school or elsewhere were getting a story about the wild day she’d had, or how she was hurting. The thought made Hotch’s heart clench for some unknown reason. He typed out this message: 

To: y/n.y/l/n@_____ISD 

From: Aaron.Hotchner65@gmail.com 

Subject: Checking-In 

Good afternoon, Ms. y/n,

 I heard from Jack and the school today that you were hurt today while trying to keep your students safe. I wanted to thank you for putting yourself in that position for the sake of the students, especially Jack. He is very worried about you and keeps asking if you’re okay. He and I both share that sentiment. I hope the school fully supports you in what you need at this time. If there is anything I can do to make your life easier these next few days, please don’t hesitate to reach out. I would be happy to drop off food or just be a support if you need it. Wishing you the best, 

Aaron Hotchner 

Hotch hit the send button and listened to the little swoosh of the sent sound. Although he did feel better after sending the email, it was also odd. He didn’t want to come off as a parental figure to y/n. Not that he wasn’t older than her by a good few years, he was, but the idea of him coming across that way made him uncomfortable. And the fact that that idea made him uncomfortable only made him question what he wanted to come off as instead. Mostly, Aaron didn’t want to seem patronizing. He knew y/n was tough and could handle things, but his concern and care had overrode those thoughts. Hotch pushed those thoughts from his mind; he had good intentions sending the email and if it came off in another way, then at least he’d tried his best. 

Aaron looked at the clock at his wall and it was five minutes to five. Unlike a normal day, where Jack would have an afterschool activity or Jess would pick him up for a few hours before he would swing by and get Jack for the rest of the evening, tonight was different, and he started packing his things up in his briefcase. He took some of the important files and the rest he left for tomorrow. He’d come to the office early if Jack felt up to going to school tomorrow. Once Hotch had most of his things ready, he moved outside of his office. Jack was playing a game with Spencer, and Aaron called out, “Jack, come up here and get your backpack and lunchbox, please. We’re about to go home.” Jack looked up at his dad and said, “Just one sec, Dad.” Aaron gave his son a look, and Jack sighed, got out of his seat, and made it up the stairs to Aaron’s side. As Jack moved past Spencer, Reid gave his head a little pat and once Jack had passed the lithe agent, Aaron gave Spence a smile before turning to his son and moving with him to the office. 

Jack only had one binder and one maths assignment out on Aaron’s office couch. Jack had promised his dad that he would be good in the office, and being good meant doing five minutes of a math worksheet and complaining about how hard it was before the little boy moved out into the bullpen to see the team. Aaron didn’t blame him. Jack had had a hard and stressful day, but he did expect his son to pick up and get ready to go on his own. 

Jack was getting old enough for those things now, but Hotch still packed his lunches every day or made sure his son had money for his lunch account. By the time Aaron had his suit jacket back on and his briefcase and shoulder bag in hand, Jack had put his paper and notebook away and was struggling to zip up his small Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles backpack. Aaron leaned down and helped him close the bag and handed it back to Jack. Aaron led his son out of the room and locked the door behind him for the last time for the day. Hotch nodded to Rossi who was also locking up his office and then followed Jack down the stairs. The pair made it through the bullpen, and Jack waved at the team as he passed them. Aaron said, “Thank you” to each of them as well in his low voice. As Hotch got to the edge of the BAU’s area, turned, and said more loudly, “Thanks for today, everyone. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Morgan, Prentiss, Reid, and JJ nodded and said bye. 

True to his word, Hotch took Jack to get ice cream at a local spot not far from their house. Jack was ecstatic to be having sweets before dinner. Aaron had to remind his son that he still had to eat some other food once they got home and settled. Jack agreed excitedly as they walked into the pastel-colored storefront. There weren’t many people inside and no one in line, so it took only a few moments for Jack to order his chocolate swirl scoop with add-ins of Oreos and strawberries. Aaron got a scoop of brown butter vanilla for himself and then paid as Jack got them spoons and napkins, then found a comfortable table in the corner of the building near the window. After paying, Hotch sat down across from Jack who said, “Thanks, Dad.” Aaron smiled and reached over and patted the top of his head, replying, “Of course, Buddy.” Hotch cherished these moments. There would only be a few more years that ice cream before dinner was a big thing, and time in some things, such as kids growing up, moved so quickly. Not only was this time for them to have a bit of fun, but it was also a teaching moment for Jack. But Aaron was going to enjoy his ice cream first. 

Aaron dipped his plastic spoon into the slightly yellow-colored ice cream. There were specks of vanilla bean in the scoop that was slowly melting in the afternoon sun. Hotch took his spoon and slipped it in his mouth, sucking off the sweetness. Hotch let the cold ice cream sit in his mouth and melt with the body heat inside. The taste was sweet, but not cloyingly so which he enjoyed. The aftertaste of the browned butter hit as he swallowed. Aaron didn’t allow himself to have anything this indulgent very often, so when he did, he tried to enjoy and appreciate it. For many years, Hotch knew that his faster metabolism had gone in his early thirties, and treats were a thing he sought out less and less for himself. However, as he watched Jack enjoy his ice cream and as the soft music played in the space while the cars drifted by outside, he realized that this was something not only Jack needed, but something he needed as well. Aaron was brutal on himself and his body, and maybe he was trying too hard. He wanted and tried to be the best version of himself for the team, but more importantly for Jack, and he might have been taking it too far on his end. He relaxed a bit into his bench seat and took another bite of ice cream, this time just enjoying it for the sake of the experience. 

After their paper bowls were empty, Aaron took a breath and looked at Jack who was playing with his spoon and asked, “Jack, did you know what those people who were at your school today were talking about?” The boy stopped fiddling with his cutlery and made a face that said he was thinking before saying, “I think so. They were mad about gay people and shouting. They were really angry and I don’t know why…” Hotch nodded his head and tried to think about how to best respond. He had talked to Jack about the LGBTQ+ community, not so much like that but in the more simple and kid-friendly way of emphasizing that anyone can love anyone else as long as it’s not hurting anyone. That there could be two moms or two dads, and that not everyone felt like a boy or a girl. Jack looked up at his dad and asked, “Why were they so angry?” 

Aaron swallowed and replied, “Well, sometimes people don’t like something, or don’t believe in something. And they can think that, but the thing is that they try and want to make other people think it too. And when people don’t agree with them, they get angry. Because if you can’t make someone agree with you, then you can at least make them scared. And what do we know about being scared, Jack?” It took a second before Jack replied, “It’s okay to be scared but being different doesn’t mean being scary.” Aaron nodded proudly and Jack added on, “So they were just big bullies?” Hotch knew it was more complex with that but for now, it was a good analogy and he nodded yes. 

This conversation gave Jack a new thought and he asked, “You told me that I shouldn’t give bullies time, but Ms. y/l/n went up to them and tried talking to them.” Aaron nodded and replied, “Yes. You’re right. That’s what I’ve said to you. Things are different with Ms. y/l/n because she’s an adult, and she was trying to keep you and all of the students safe. But you’re right, for you, Jack, I would say to stay away from a situation like that, but there are some other things you can do too.” Aaron knew that Jack was a helper, and always had been. So in a situation where his son might feel helpless, he wanted to give him an option to do something that would give him power in the scenario and to do something that he was good at. 

Aaron stated, “So what you can do, Jack, is to find the other kids like you who might be upset. Because those people were saying upsetting and hurtful things. So you can find those kids who are hurting and make sure they’re doing okay.” Jack nodded along, this was something he could do. Aaron also added, “And if things seem bad, like if you feel unsafe or the other kids feel unsafe, the best thing you can do is get help from an adult. From someone you trust or know. Does that make sense?” Jack nodded and sat forward, mirroring Aaron’s posture as he shook his head yes. Hotch smiled and said, “Good, If you have more questions about today you can ask me anytime, okay?” 

Just as Aaron and Jack were getting ready to head home, Hotch’s phone pinged with an incoming message, and he checked it. The email was from y/n and he tapped on the screen opening the message which read: 

To: Aaron.Hotchner65@gmail.com 

From: y/n.y/l/n@_____ISD 

Subject: Re-Checking-In 

Good afternoon, Mr. Hotchner, 

Thank you so much for checking in on me. That is very kind of you. I’m just sorry that Jack or any of the students at recess had to see and hear what they did. As for what the administration thinks about what I did today, I think I’m going to find that out tomorrow, but don’t want to know really, nor should I speculate about it in an email. You are niceto offer your help. I think I’m just going to order a frozen pizza from the store and call it a night. I’m a bit banged up, if it was any more than this I think I’d have to go to the ER (that last bit is hyperbole). Thanks again for checking in Mr. Hotchner. I hope Jack isn’t too upset. Tell him I said hello, and that I’ll see him tomorrow at school! I hope you have a pleasant night, 

Ms. y/n. 

Aaron frowned slightly. There was a hesitancy in y/n’s tone here. Especially with how the school might react to what had happened. That, and the fact that y/n seemed to be in a lot of pain didn’t make Hotch feel good. It made him want to go over and see her even more. He paused to make sure this was still being done with good intentions. That his desire wasn’t just trying to find an opportunity to see y/n again. The feelings in his gut were still one of concern, even if his heart was doing something different. Hotch pushed aside the new feelings in his chest, something for him to contemplate later, and composed a reply to y/n: 

To: y/n.y/l/n@_____ISD 

From: Aaron.Hotchner65@gmail.com 

Subject: Re-re-Checking-In 

y/n, I’m glad you can bring some humor into this situation. That’s a relief. It sounds like you’re in a good bit of pain. Are you sure you don’t need to go to the ER? Also, would you let me pick you up a pizza? It’s no big deal at all, and that way you can save money on the delivery. Sorry, I don’t mean to overreach, but I am willing to give a helping hand if you want. 

Aaron Hotchner

Hotch really hoped he wasn’t sounding too desperate, or that y/n would think his offering to help her save money made her feel poor. He didn’t mean it that way. He’d tossed a few options out for her to reach out if she needed, or wanted help, or just some company. From what Aaron could tell about y/n was that she was fiercely independent. She’d seemed so put together for someone in their mind a/r. From what he could tell from y/n’s weekly email updates, she made a lot of her own classroom content and tried very hard to connect with each of her students. Not only that but from the two times they’d met at school, there were no indications that she had a partner or parents close by to help her with things. Aaron assumed this mainly because she’d told him how she’d had to learn how to fix the leak in her bathroom faucet from YouTube just so she didn’t have to call in a plumber. That was another time when Aaron had wished he could just whisk himself over to her duplex and lend y/n a hand. Before he could overthink what he’d sent there was another reply: 

To: Aaron.Hotchner65@gmail.com 

From: y/n.y/l/n@_____ISD 

Subject: Re-re-re-Checking-In 

Ummm, you’d do that, really? I don’t want to be a bother, Mr. Hotchner. I know you have to take care of Jack and everything… 

y/n y/l/n

Now a hint of a smile turned up the corner of Aaron’s mouth. He and Jack had made it to the car at this point and Hotch typed out: 

To: y/n.y/l/n@_____ISD 

From: Aaron.Hotchner65@gmail.com 

Subject: [Re]-Checking-In 

y/n, 

I’d be happy to take even a small load off of your shoulders. After what you’ve been through today it is the least I can do, and I can get someone to sit with Jack for an hour or so while I come over. To make communication easier, here is my cell Number: (804) 572 - 4459. If you’d like, however, to keep this over email, that’s fine as well. It might be a moment before I get back to you as I have to get Jack home and get him dinner, but I’ll be open after that and talk to you again then. Do you have any allergies or dietary restrictions I should know about before I go grab your pizza? 

Aaron Hotchner 

The drive home was quiet as Jack thought about what his dad had said. The sandy-haired boy had a few more questions which Aaron did his best to explain. When the questions turned toward religion, it had been a church group protesting, Hotch did his best to turn the conversation back to the key points. He rarely talked to Jack about church or religion, wanting his son to be able to make his own choices in faith, or not to have any at all. That hadn’t been a choice for Hotch as a child, and he wanted Jack to not have the burn of guilt that faith could bring unless it was something his son came to on his own terms. Plus religion had become a bit of a sore subject for Aaron after Haley’s passing. How could a fair God take away someone as good and pure as Haley? It didn’t make sense, and he didn’t have the will to study theodicy. So he pushed those thoughts to the background and focused on getting home. 

It didn’t take long for Aaron to get dinner ready for Jack. While he reheated some leftover pasta and veggies, Jack did his homework, and they both had a small dinner. Hotch also texted Jess to see if she was open to swing by for an hour to which she replied, “Yes. I never miss a chance to hang out with my coolest nephew. Are you going on a date or something?” Aaron rolled his eyes at the text, he suspected sarcasm and replied, “Something like that. Making a house call to a friend in need. I’ll tell you more later.” A moment later Jess sent a thumbs-up emoji and said, “I’ll be over in about forty minutes once my boys are settled, probably playing Fortnite or something *sigh*” Hotch liked the text and checked his messages to see a text from a new number which he correctly assumed was y/n. She had sent a simple, “Hello, it’s me, y/n. For your pizza question, I have a/d/r so knock yourself out with that. I’m not a picky eater. Also here’s my address, ________. I’m not doing anything tonight, I couldn’t even if I wanted to, so you can come over anytime, but before nine would be great as I have to wake up early. Thanks so much again. This is very, very nice of you. - y/n.” Aaron liked the text and replied, “Sounds good. I’ll make sure to make it to yours before nine. - Aaron.” 

Jess arrived promptly at 6:30, and Hotch let her know it was the normal bedtime routine that night. A half hour of TV, upstairs, teeth brushed, and in bed by 8:30. Jessica nodded and said, “Gotcha. You owe me a story for this one.” Aaron chuckled and said, “I’ll let you know. There’s an open bottle of Pino in the fridge if you want some. I shouldn’t be gone long.” Jess couldn’t help herself from saying, “That's what she said,” and Hotch flushed crimson. Unlike Haley, Jess had gotten the more crass humor of the Brooks family. 

Aaron left the room, keys in hand before any more jokes could be levied at him. He really didn’t plan on staying at y/n’s long. However thanks to the recent comments, Aaron couldn’t help but feel like he was a teenager sneaking out of the house to see some girl after curfew. Hotch shook his head at the silly notion and reminded himself that he was an adult man, and such thoughts were above him. However, he couldn’t stop the small thrill that ran through him as he entered y/n’s address into his phone. He swung by the local store and picked up two frozen pizzas that he thought y/n would like and matched her allergy and dietary restrictions she’d sent him earlier. He also moved to the pharmacy section and picked up some pain relievers, liniment oil, and cotton pads, just in case y/n didn’t have any of those things at her apartment. After all, she had said she was going to get stuff delivered to her, and he didn’t know if those were things she had planned on getting and then just didn’t tell him because she hadn’t wanted to be a burden. At least, that was how Aaron justified the extra purchases. 

Hotch texted y/n that he was on the way and the closer he got to her place, the more nervous he felt. It was strange. He hadn’t felt this way in ages. He had to keep attempting to suppress the feeling, but it kept creeping up on him like frost on the ground in the morning; an inevitable thing that he knew would change and probably go away with time. It was a week away from summer, there shouldn’t be frost on the ground at all. Hotch felt exasperated at his state and realized that maybe he was just too cold of a person and the frost stuck with him. Outside of y/n’s place, Aaron said, “Get ahold of yourself Hotchner, and be helpful for once, goddammit.” His little pep-talk got him to the door with the groceries. The lights were on inside and Aaron knocked lightly on the front door. There was a very muffled, “I’m coming” and all of a sudden the piercing darkness was broken by a stream of yellow light that poured from y/n’s open door. Aaron blinked for a second as he took in y/n. She seemed pretty relaxed in an oversized t-shirt and shorts that were nearly swallowed by the length of her shirt. She was barefoot and leaning against the door frame taking him in as well. Apart from the angry bruises on y/n’s face and her split lip, she looked comfortable here. ‘This is her home, of course, she’s comfortable’ Aaron reminded himself. 

While Hotch’s eyes had been adjusting to the light, y/n’s eyes were getting used to the dark. Jack’s father had always been an attractive man even though she’d only seen him briefly in the drop-off and pick-up lines and even less for any extended period of time. But Mr. Hotchner had a face, and attitude one didn’t easily forget. There was an intensity about him, a fierceness that could easily draw one in or scare one away. 

y/n wondered why the other teachers didn’t talk about him more. Maybe it was all the things he and Jack had gone through, horrible horrible things that kept people away. It made sense that Mr. Hotchner was in the FBI. He had a high-intensity job. All that energy had to go somewhere, and when he wasn’t being a parent to Jack and doting on his son, he must be doing dangerous and exciting things. Far more exciting than her job at least. y/n noticed his jeans and polo, a new outfit on him, and most certainly not his normal pressed suit and tie. y/n wasn’t complaining. His arms filled out the sleeves and his waist seemed a little less trim. y/n felt like a total fool for just standing there, realizing that he was also waiting to come inside, or maybe just drop off the bag of groceries he’d brought her so kindly using his own money and taking time out of his night. 

y/n snapped back to reality and berated herself and thought, ‘You’re fun little thoughts are getting out of hand. Please like he’d care about you like that.’ It was true, y/n had allowed herself to think, just a bit about the mysterious Mr. Hotchner. It was harmless, just small vignettes of them laughing about a joke, or holding hands -- kid's stuff, or at least it had been until he showed up outside her doorstep. y/n shook her head and said, “I’m so sorry Mr. Hotchner. I get hit in the head and my manners fly out the window. Would you like to come in, or just hand those things over? I can pay you back for them. Do you have PayPal or Venmo?” The words came out quickly, more quickly than y/n had hoped. There was no hope in sounding nonchalant now. A flush started forming on y/n’s face and she wanted to put her face in her palm, but had enough dignity left to not do that in front of the parent of her student. 

Aaron let out a little sigh of relief knowing that he wasn’t the only one who thought meeting like this was a bit, different. He wondered for a second why y/n had accepted his help, but pushed that aside and said, “Please Ms. y/n, you can just call me Aaron. I’d like to come in for a moment. See if you’re alright if you don’t mind?” y/n nodded and opened the door wider for Hotch. Aaron slid past her into the warm comfort of her space. It was lit mostly by lamps and the furnishings seemed soft and cozy which would match y/n’s personality. It was a bit more sparse and minimal than Hotch would have imagined, but maybe the chaos of a classroom called for order at home. The lights in the kitchen were on and the brightest. Hotch heard the soft click of the door behind him as he looked over the space. 

y/n stepped forward and said, “Well, please just call me y/n. Unless I’m in the classroom, Ms. makes me feel like a 19th-century spencer waiting for Harlod Hill to come into town.” y/n rolled her eyes at her choice of words. ‘Yes y/n, let’s talk about The Music Man in front of Mr. Hotchner, why don’t you?’ In an attempt to recover and hide her embarrassment, y/n stated. “I was just pouring myself a glass of wine when you knocked, um, would you like one? I can also take those groceries from you.” Aaron offered y/n a soft smile that only made her heart beat faster as he extended the bag of groceries and said, “I’m good for now. Thank you. Have you had anything to eat yet tonight?” y/n took the paper bag and their fingers brushed, the warmth of their skin spreading despite the frozen contents inside the bag. y/n cleared her throat and turned toward the kitchen in an attempt to hide how flustered she was. The cool linoleum tile of her kitchen managed to cool her down, and she placed the pizzas in the freezer. She tried to say casually over her shoulder, “I haven’t eaten yet, no. You can sit down anywhere if you like…” y/n didn’t know exactly if Mr. Hotchner wanted to stay long and she felt silly for having offered him a drink in the first place. Maybe he didn’t drink. By the time y/n had situated the food, Aaron had taken a seat in one of the chairs sitting catty corner to her tan couch. Trying to play it cool, y/n moved to her counter and poured herself the glass of wine she had been planning before she’d put her foot in her mouth. y/n contemplated that maybe this was why she was good with kids. The nuances of adulthood could pass over children’s heads so easily. They didn’t feel the awkwardness that y/n did right now. Nor the racing of her heart as Aaron filled one of her seats. 

She moved over to the couch and asked again, “Can I please pay you back for the groceries? It was nice of you to bring them, and for you to check in on me. I got a few angry emails from parents saying that I exposed their children to danger today, so yours was a nice change.” Aaron’s eyebrows pulled together. The comment about payment passed him by. He wasn’t going to let Jack’s favorite teacher pay him back, even if she asked a hundred times. But the more pressing issue was the emails from other parents. If y/n’s actions didn’t look good, then he didn’t know what they were. He asked in a low voice, “Why were they upset?” y/n bit her lower lip and cringed as the pain stung from the split in her mouth. She had forgotten it was there for a moment. Perhaps she shouldn’t have brought up the other emails. Depending on how the district’s admin took her situation, it wouldn’t help her to spread information. 

y/n chose her words carefully as she replied, “Well some were mad that I got hurt in front of their children and some were angry that their kids were exposed to those protestors in the first place.” y/n looked at Aaron and his slightly annoyed and sympathetic gaze made her feel better, safe. She hadn’t really processed what had happened to her yet, and she’d been alone since she’d been sent home. It was good to have someone here, and y/n took a sip of her wine and set her glass down on the table before leaning her head back on the couch and sighing deeply deflating slightly. 

In a smaller voice, a voice that gave away the pain she was feeling y/n said, “Maybe I shouldn’t have done anything. I just didn’t like the things they were saying. Kids are much more cognizant than people like to think and for those who have gay parents, or siblings, or might be part of the community themselves, they shouldn’t have to hear that stuff.” y/n pinched the bridge of her nose and continued, “This had to happen the week before summer break?” As y/n had her eyes closed, Aaron took the chance to give her face a better look. The bruise under her eye was turning a nasty purple that would fade to an even more ugly yellow color in the following days. The split on her lip looked nasty as well. The tender pink skin must hurt as she talked. He got what she was saying about kids knowing more than others expected. Jack was a prime example of that. Of course, Jack had been through more pain and grief than many his age. It would only make sense that he was more perceptive. The claims from the other parents sounded like bullshit to him though. 

y/n turned her face to him and said softly, “Sorry for unloading on you. I haven’t really had anyone to talk to about this yet. I don’t mean to hold you up.” Aaron nodded his head no and said, “You’re not bothering me, and you’re not holding me up. What were the protestors saying exactly, had you seen them before?” y/n’s eyes softened. She hadn’t really allowed herself the opportunity to picture Aaron like this in person, so kind and concerned. She’d just let herself think silly little snippets, but this gentleness hadn’t filtered into the equation. y/n moved her gaze to the ceiling and said, “Oh they were saying all the homophobic classics. Fags go to hell, god hates queers, and they were accusing the teachers on the staff of being groomers and turning the students gay, all that jazz.” Hotch rolled his eyes. These points were so tiring at this point, and he was annoyed with y/n for having to deal with this. y/n looked at Hotch and said, “And I haven’t seen any of those people before. Not like I’d be looking for those types of people on a daily anyway. They must have come down from upstate.” 

Hotch let out a small huff, his lawyer side kicking in as he asked, “You seemed hesitant about the school’s response to what you did today, and some other parents showed concern. Do you think the district might not support your actions?” y/n sat forward and took another drink of wine, more this time. It was helping her calm down. Not that she normally needed wine to unwind, but it had been a long day, and there was a very attractive man unexpectedly sitting in her home. That last fact was still a wonder to y/n. Like a dream. y/n considered that she might have gotten a very bad concussion and was being wheeled right now to a hospital. But she was brought back from her wayward thoughts when Hotch cleared his throat. y/n shook her head. She was letting her brain get away with itself far more than normal. But she blamed it on the pain, painkillers, and stress of the whole situation. That stress was slightly intensified by Mr. Hotchner’s question, but y/n realized it was better to say it out loud instead of keeping it in to eat at her. 

y/n sighed and said, “It really depends. You’ve heard about that Mom’s for Student Purity campaign at the beginning of the school year, I’m sure?” Hotch nodded his head slightly. He had heard of it but hadn’t thought much of it. Only that there had been some issues and poor behavior at the school assemblies. Aaron had assumed that the district had taken care of the situation and that’s why he hadn’t heard more about it. As hard as Hotch tried to be involved in Jack’s academic life, and he did show up to every game, play, and parent-teacher conference, he didn’t have much time for the school board meetings. That had been Haley’s forte and the thought pained him momentarily. Aaron wished he could live up to the expectation that y/n must have had of him as he said, “I’ve heard of them, but not much. I’m sure they’d have something to say about today.” 

y/n let out a little snort and replied, “Tell me about it. The district has been having a constant battle with them. Ever since the president and the vice-president of their organization got elected to the school board it’s been hard to keep them at bay. They’ve tried implementing book bans, vetting curriculum, and getting the librarian fired. Right now they’re not in the majority and their ideas are unfounded and impractical to implement, but they’re making things hard. Every time the district shoots them down, they start a new campaign and it gets more troublesome. I know this will come up in a performance review and if they don’t like it, they’ll find a way to make it hard for me. They’ve done it to others already. I can imagine the comments, ‘Teacher causes brawl in front of students leaving them disturbed.’” 

Hotch took a moment to think about how hard that must be. To have to be so careful that making a choice to do the right thing could get y/n in trouble. How the system was setting her up to have to make hard choices at the expense of her employment possibly. All of these loopholes reminded him of his own work in a way, though he didn’t have to deal with kids all day. Even though some of the police and sheriff’s departments the BAU worked with acted like children. y/n sighed and said, “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to complain. I love my job. I love working with my students. I love to see their joy and to have concepts click in their heads. They bring me so much happiness every day. It’s just the other part of the job, having to tip-toe around people and admin, it kind of dims that excitement I had when I was a new teacher.” y/n finished off her wine as Aaron took a moment to think. y/n had a great way of telling stories, it wasn’t a surprise that Jack was drawn to her tone and humor. It drew him in. He turned his head back to y/n who was now longingly looking between her wine bottle on her counter and her empty glass, as if trying to decide if she should risk another glass. 

Hotch asked carefully, “Have you taken anything for the pain?” He didn’t want to say that she looked rough, but her face looked like it hurt, and from y/n’s small grimaces, it clearly did. y/n nodded and said, “I did. I had some painkillers when I got home. I think I have another hour before I can take another round.” Aaron didn’t make a comment on y/n’s choice to mix alcohol with painkillers, nor the fact that she was drinking on an empty stomach. He’d recommend that she have some dinner in a minute, but for now, he said, “Well, I think if you iced your face for a bit and used some liniment oil on your lip it would reduce the swelling. It’s still going to hurt for a few days, but the bruising should be a little better, and it might tide you over until you can take your next dose of painkillers.” y/n nodded and said, “There’s a bag of ice in the freezer. I was doing that earlier but then fell asleep. I woke up in a nice puddle.” y/n grunted slightly as she got to her feet and made her way toward the kitchen. Aaron followed her with his gaze and he asked, “Can I refill your wine glass, and maybe you can try that oil, it’s pretty soothing. I know from experience.” 

y/n turned her head toward Aaron, he was being so nice to her and she wasn’t sure why. She didn’t come across people who were just nice for the sake of it often, and it filled her with warmth. She nodded her head yes and tried to imagine Aaron, who was always so put-together and composed, not bruised and bloody. The thought sent a pang through her. She wondered how often his getting injured happened, and if he’d let her help him like he was helping her. y/n shook her head. This was already feeling like a fantasy, she couldn’t possibly hope for more than this. Things like this didn’t happen, not to her. y/n grabbed the bag of ice that had refrozen after her nap, and grabbed a towel from the drawer next to the fridge, cradling the cool bag in her hand. y/n moved back to the couch and sat back down. The butterflies in her tummy had fluttered their wings like they did when they stopped to get warmed on the gray pavement outside of her house in summer. She wished she could still them, but at the same time, it was such a rush, they almost made up for the pain in her face. She wished she could get a better read on Mr. Hotchner. She knew about his son, and his circumstances, but even so, he was unpredictable like a comet. Why he’d offered to help her apart from out of kindness was hard to pin down, and she didn’t dare ask him outright. Why she’d accepted was another mystery. Did wanting to be in the company of a good man make her a bad person? Was she sexualizing him, taking advantage? 

Before her thoughts could take her further, y/n pressed the bag to her face, covering her and dimming the flush that was blooming on her cheeks. y/n pressed a little too hard and grimaced at the cold and the pressure. Just as she did this, Aaron sat down with her wine and the grocery bag. Hotch softly said, “Gentle now.” y/n looked up at him, half of her face covered, and smiled. She felt like I might cry, but she didn’t know why. How pathetic she must have looked to him. Not able to take care of herself. But she’d been trying. She’d been trying to prove she could care for herself forever. Now one had trusted her, not after the accident. Not after her life had been turned around. But she didn’t talk about that. She didn’t even talk about it with herself anymore. There was no point in self-pity, she’d lived, externally unscathed. For as perceptive as Mr. Hotchner was, he couldn’t know everything inside her, maybe that was what she was waiting for. Someone who could explain why bad things happened to good people. y/n swallowed back her emotions and wiped away one stray tear, and Hotch sat in silence watching her with concern. Wondering why her mood had shifted so suddenly. 

After a few minutes, y/n pulled the ice pack off her face and set it on the table. She then picked up her fresh wine glass and took a smaller sip, savoring it this time, as she did this, Aaron put his hand into the grocery bag and pulled out the cotton wipes normally used for removing makeup, then the liniment oil which was in a small dropper topped bottle. He opened the bottle and took off the paper cover keeping the clear liquid inside. Hotch screwed on the cap and then dropped a few drops of oil onto the pad. He considered that if this was for Jack, he’d use his hands, and let the warmth of his skin soothe the hurt. But this wasn’t Jack, and Aaron remembered that as he started raising his hand to y/n’s mouth like she was someone he could just tend to like family. Hotch froze mid-movement and turned noticeably red. He cleared his throat and said, “Sorry,” as he set the pad into y/n’s waiting hand. She was as shocked as he was at how he’d reached out for her. y/n murmured a barely audible, “Thanks” as she took the pad and, this time, more carefully pressed it to her split lip. Aaron filled the silence with what he hoped were some helpful reminders. It felt too awkward if he didn’t speak after his slip-up with his hand, plus, he was going to have to leave in a few minutes. He didn’t want to stay out late and the darkness outside was only getting darker. 

“If the school or the district ends up giving you any serious trouble, make sure your union rep is with you when you have to explain the situation. And, heaven forbid, there is some complaint and the union can’t do anything, I have a few lawyer friends I can get you in contact with.” y/n nodded her understanding, Her eyes widened at his lawyer comment. Who doesn’t this man know? Aaron continued, “You should ice your face on and off until you go to bed, and make sure you get some dinner before you sleep. You can also use this oil in other places if you’re aching elsewhere, just make sure not to get it in your eyes.” y/n watched him list off these things so collectedly. Not even having to think about them. She considered that he would make a good teacher if he was inclined toward that profession, but then again, he was the leader of an FBI Unit, how much more of a teacher can you get than that? y/n snapped her head up, realizing Aaron was saying something to her. Hotch smiled and repeated, “Can I see?” He gestured toward her lip and y/n let out a little breath and said, “Okay,” as she removed the pad from her lip and looked into Aaron’s dark, thoughtful eyes.

Hotch sat forward in his chair. y/n’s face was in the light of a lamp and he could see her full-looking lips which were pretty except where they were marred by the scar and scab of dark clotted blood. It didn’t look bad enough to need stitches, but just barely. He’d seen so many scars like these on Morgan, Reid, Emily, and his own mouth that it didn’t bother him. What did bother him was that what was a painful and annoying injury being inflicted on y/n. That would sting for at least a week. Sure it sucked when it happened to him or a member of the team, but they’d signed up for that, the most y/n should have to expect in terms of harm on the job was a paper cut. Clearly, he had been mistaken. 

Since they had both returned to their seats, y/n and Aaron had started drifting closer together like moths drawn to a flame. Hotch was about a foot away from y/n and could feel the ghost of her breath on his face and the hint of her barely touched second glass of rose now forgotten on the table. Without thinking, he moved his large hand up to the side of her face. The warmth of his hand on the side of her face had y/n rest her chin in his palm, and she closed her eyes. Not exactly sure what or why he was doing this, Aaron brushed his thumb over y/n’s top lip and then softly over her bottom lip. She winced as the pad of his thumb brushed over her scab, but didn’t pull away from his touch. y/n opened her eyes and Hotch dropped his hand. He leaned in slightly, entranced by y/n, her presence, just wanting to be a bit closer to her. y/n did the same. 

The moment was shattered when y/n’s phone loudly went off. Aaron dropped his hand like a lead weight, and y/n’s head snapped toward her phone on the side of the table. She turned her gaze back toward Aaron, but the moment had been broken. He looked silly, almost ashamed of himself. He’d pulled back and away and his posturing also made y/n feel like a fool. What had she been thinking? y/n got up grabbed her phone and answered, stepping farther away, but not so far away that Hotch couldn’t hear. What did she have to lose after acting so immature in front of him anyway? She could hardly think how she’d act when she saw him again, especially in the classroom. 

Putting the phone to her ear, she listened as her doctor asked if she’d picked up the refill of the medication that she had needed since her accident. y/n dipped her head. She’d completely forgotten about going to the pharmacy after her day and replied, “No not yet. I’ll pick them up right after work tomorrow.” There was a short reminder that those meds were helping y/n and she shouldn’t go without them. y/n nodded and said, “I know. I’ll pick them up tomorrow. I have enough to make it till then.” Hotch watched y/n cave in on herself as she walked away from him. He hadn’t meant to make her feel bad, or silly. He felt silly. Like someone who hadn’t been thinking about what he was doing. He shouldn’t have put y/n in that position and he was sorry for it. He’d have to find a way to apologize and leave y/n to her night before making some other kind of monumental error in judgment. 

Hotch heard y/n wrap up her call and her footsteps came back toward him. He stood and moved into the open space of the living room. The front door was just a few feet away and he felt like running out of it. But he stayed in discomfort and said, “I’m sorry for what I did earlier, y/n. That was inappropriate. I, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” y/n dropped her eyes again and said, “It’s alright. You were really kind to come over here and listen to me ramble and complain for half an hour. Not even my friends did that, and I’ll make sure to heed your advice. It’s clear you have a lot more practical life experience than I do. You don’t need to apologize for anything.” Aaron nodded, trying to accept her words for a situation he’d created. He wished he could explain what he’d been thinking, but he couldn’t because he hadn’t been thinking. The final nail in the coffin was when y/n said, “I hope you have a good night, Mr. Hotchner.” The change back to his last name, y/n hoped sounded regretful, but to Aaron, it only sounded hollow. Now it was Aaron’s turn to drop his head and he moved toward the door, stopping for one second as his fingertips brushed the cool metal, so unlike y/n’s warm skin. 

y/n didn’t like this. She didn’t like this at all. She hadn’t really known why she’d said yes to him coming over other than she wanted to see Aaron. She had enjoyed feeling his hand on her face. It was fast and strange like a dream, but she’d liked it, and part of her wanted very badly to understand why she’d wanted him here. And she didn’t think she could do it alone. She assumed that Aaron was as lost as she was. It seemed like he was. The words of y/n’s therapist rang in her ears, “Sometimes being strong is letting people in instead of keeping them out.” Just as Hotch’s hand latched onto the door knob y/n said, “Mr. Hotch… Aaron. I can’t exactly tell you why I asked you here, apart from the fact that I wanted you here, and I really enjoyed having you here, for all of it. I mean, like, before the phone call. I don’t know what this is,” she gestured between them, and continued, “But I’d like to understand it more. Maybe when the semester is over we could get coffee or something. Or if you don’t want that, I understand too.” 

There was a moment of silence that felt like an eternity before Aaron turned. His expression looked lighter, and maybe there was a ghost of a smile on his face that said, “I’d like that y/n. I enjoyed tonight too. You have my number now, so you let me know once you have the headspace to come up with a day for our meeting. I look forward to it.” y/n smiled too and raised her hand and waved. Hotch then moved outside and closed the door behind him. As he walked down the drive he felt better. Much better, and happy he’d come, even if he hadn’t been sure why, he had a better picture now, and he felt less guilty about it. He’d have something to tell Jess when the time was right, but for now, he could look forward to getting to know y/n better, and get to know himself too. 

Inside, y/n looked at the door for a second before she moved to it and locked it. She then moved to the couch and dropped into the cushions with a sigh. Once she’d grounded herself, y/n grabbed her glass and took another sip. The bag of ice was once again going unnoticed on the cushions and melting. y/n pulled the glass from her lips and contemplated how her face didn’t hurt so much anymore. Perhaps it was the painkillers, or the wine, or maybe, just maybe, it was the courage to tell Aaron the truth, and the possibility to know more about that feeling between them.

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[lesinquietes]

I once wrote this longfic about Yandere!Professor!Levi who works out of a university and agrees to take you on as his teaching assistant in the first year of your grad degree…… and guys, the brainrot is back 🥺

Tw; coercion, degradation, dominant levi, dubcon (just a sprinkle), oral sex (levi receiving), slut-shaming, spanking

He remembers how much completing a master’s degree sucks. Rewarding? A little. But mostly just a waste of time keeping to the institution’s expectations of excellence. Originally, he only applied to see if he would get one of the scholarships they offered to the poor folk. He didn’t anticipate gaining entry to the program.

Fast forward to eight years later, and he’s cozy in his teaching position. The headmaster is his best friend, Erwin Smith. Life is good. He doesn’t have to teach much with the team of graduate assistants he has each semester. He lets them conduct seminars on course material to get “teaching experience”. As if that’ll help them find a job afterwards.

Although everything seems to have fallen into place for him, there’s still something missing. A void. A yearning. For what, he doesn’t know; that is, until you came along. You make him realize that life isn’t meant to be easy.

For every class he teaches, he receives at least one teaching assistant. Oftentimes, the flock he gets are new graduate students who don’t know their hand from their foot. They’re so nervous in their new role, that they cause more havoc than they’re worth. As such, he’s learned to be a hard ass. It turns out tough love works better than coddling.

But you.

You don’t respond well to either.

And it pisses him off how you’re not predictable. Growing up in the slums made his ability to read situations damn near immaculately. To some degree, he should be able to predict most common behaviours. He’s utterly confused when you don’t respond to reward or punishment. What kind of person are you? The fascination takes him faster than the alcohol did after Farlan and Isabel died in that car accident. Unlike the liquor, he lets his attraction for you bloom.

He treats you like an academic study. He writes down his hypotheses and then conducts an experiment to record data. He documents every method he tries, hoping to make a breakthrough, all while skirting under your radar; the subject can’t know her role in his field research.

Initially, he’s hard on you. He discovered a marking error on one of his students’ returned papers. Usually he doesn’t bother to check his teaching assistant’s work. With you, he’s been putting in overtime.

“The fuck is this?” He growled, tossing the paper onto your desk.

“What?”

You took the sheet onto your hands and scanned the lines with careful orbs. When you reached the bottom, you locked eyes with him. He doesn’t utter a word. You’re bright enough to understand the implicit message.

“I made a mistake,” you state. “I’m sorry, I’ll be more careful.”

You always act so diplomatic with him. He wishes you would let your guard down. You speak to your colleagues with less of an edge to your tone.

“I thought a master’s student would be able to handle bachelor’s level shit.” He antagonized you. “If you fuck up again I’ll scrap your contract for next semester.”

It’s a bluff. He won’t do that. He doesn’t want anyone else getting you as a teaching assistant, least of all that creep Miche. You’re too alluringly odd. Levi wants to lay claim to you.

“It won’t happen again,” you called after him. “Sorry.”

A lightbulb goes off in his head. His vivid memory of your nonchalance gave him a bright idea. You don’t mean your apologies because you don’t care. Truly.

Of course you haven’t been responsive to his rearing techniques; you aren’t interested in what he’s offering. He hasn’t been using the correct rewards and punishments. You’re in this teaching assistant position against your will; you needed to take it on so you could afford to pay your tuition. He bets you’re dying for stimulation.

With this in mind, he sends you an email, requesting your presence in his office tomorrow morning. If you want something to captivate your picky mind, he’s going to give it to you.

He can’t believe his eyes when you actually obey his request to bend over his desk. Your skirt hikes up, revealing your cute panties. They’re white. The way they don’t fit around the cheeks of your ass makes his cock twitch in his pants. The notion that you planned this crosses his mind. He dismisses it in favour of indulging.

Levi smacks his ruler against your ass, revelling in how your holes twitch each time he strikes. You respond well to this punishment. You moan and gasp when he goes harder, panting breathily like a desperate whore. He’s never seen so much life in your face. He only stops hitting your plump globes when the skin feels tender and worn beneath his palm; even then, he gives them one more clap before standing up to tug down his trousers.

You suck his cock next. Who knew you were such a champ at giving head? He helps you along with a firm hand glued to the back of your skull. You choke and slobber when his rip slams into the back of your throat. He doesn’t let up. Tears are streaming down your face until he decides it’s time you worship his balls. He shoves your nose and mouth into his sack, shuddering when he feels your tongue lavish each sphere with your love. It’s almost enough to make him cum.

He can’t take much more of your teasing. He forces himself down your throat a second time and shoots his load. You cough and sputter, but he doesn’t let you off. You’ll only have the privilege of air when you swallow. Once you do, he’s happy to permit you to breathe.

He grabs a fistful of your hair and tilts your head up. His steely orbs are filled with wanton lust. Your makeup is smeared and your eyes are glossy. You’re in a daze. This is what you wanted all along; to be used by your professor.

Well, if that’s what it’ll take for you to maintain an interest in grading for his class, he’s happy to do it; the next time you need some proctoring, he’ll be sure to claim that wet pussy of yours.

[koolades-world]

hewwo congrats on ur 2k journey! more blessings for you to come :3

can we have a prompt 23 & 24 with Levi?

thank you!❤️❤️

thank you! consider it done :)

this is the last prompt!! thank you for everyone who submitted a request. it was super fun and it was a god way for me to great creative haha. will post a masterlist of everything from the event soon!!

enjoy <3

prompt 23 and 24 w/ Levi

It was well known that Levi didn't enjoy going out. Anywhere outside his room was uncharted territory, and he had no desire to light up that gray part of the map. He was content with only occasionally leaving his room for events out in the real world. Other than that, he enjoyed staying in his room. It was his check point and everything about it was comfortably predictable. He didn't expect the human exchange student to understand him so well.

He'd actually expected to only see you several times max, but you kept going out of your way to do things for him, such as delivering him dinner, or slipping a postcard of his favorite character under the door. Each time, he managed to miss you, but he knew it had to be you, because his brothers didn't care about him or his interests enough to do that for him. The first time he worked up enough courage to thank you, he accidently caught you midway through your act of kindness. Levi felt as if he was he was about to die of embarrassment, but he carried through with the plan and slammed the door on you. He regretted it afterwards, so the next day, he opened the door again to apologize. He hadn't expected you to invite him out to the anime cafe that had just opened nearby. The rest was history.

From then on, he thought of you as another check point of his. Anywhere you went, he felt more comfortable. So, when you wanted to go out, he couldn't help but feel the desire to tag along. He'd tried staying in, but he always felt left out. Because of this, he ended up going with you more often than not. He saw lots of things that he didn't get to see much by your side, such as unfamiliar shops and restaurants that he didn't even know existed. Sometimes, a brother or two of his might be there, but since Levi would be with you, they didn't need to come.

Being out made him nervous, but being alone with you made him even more so. A couple times, the two of you were mistaken to be out on a date. Every time that happened, he felt as if might explode from the overwhelming feelings within. He loved to spend time with you, but you contributed to the building internal pressure he often experienced. Often times, just looking at you caused him to grow shy. You were so gorgeous, and gave him your undivided attention. The intense way you gazed at him while he rambled just got his heart racing, but he'd be damned again before he told you that.

"Earth to Levi!" You waved a hand in front of his face.

"Mc! Sorry." Levi tucked his D.D.D. in his pocket. It seemed he'd been absentmindedly staring at it while he'd been lost in thought.

"No worries! Our table is ready." The two of you were trying out another restaurant you'd been dying to go to, and as the sucker he was, of course Levi wanted to go with you. He wouldn't let his brothers do it, that was for sure.

"Oh, alright." He followed you through the restaurant, glancing around as he did. It had a very casual, rustic vibe. He sat down across from you at the table for two, and flipped through the menu briefly. You began to talk to him about your next project for your hobby, and he sat and listened carefully. He didn't know how to engage since he didn't know much about what you were talking about, but he could at least ask questions and show you he was interested.

As you were talking, you suddenly stopped and stared at him. He grew nervous under your gaze. "What is it?" He frantically began to wipe his face and straighten his clothes.

"No, it's not that." You leant over the table and swept his bangs aside. You held them there, and clipped them with a couple cute little barrettes. He reached up and touched them.

"What was that for?" He could feel himself growing warm.

"You know how I feel about your hair in your face. You have really pretty eyes, and I hate not being able to see them. Orange is my favorite color for a reason." Levi had to stop and process your words, and once he didn't he had no clue how to respond. You knew just how to get him to feel loved, but so incredibly anxious at the same time. "You don't have to answer that. I just wanted you to know that you're beautiful." You understood him so well, which was part of the reason why the two of you were as close as you were. He found it in him to smile at you without turning bright red.

When the waiter came to ask how the two of you were, and asked if they could get you any drinks, you ordered for the both of you. The two of you got on like a house on fire, because you complimented each other. You knew each other's strengths and weaknesses, and instead if criticizing each other, like Levi's brothers might to him, you did what he couldn't and helped him. He hadn't expected to find such kin in a human he hadn't even intended to get to know, but he was glad that he did.

[seishinnookami]

chapter two; No way I’m doing this!

Twisted wonderland x Obey me crossover

Not a real timeline

perspective: second

disclamer; passing out, mention of kidnapping, crowded street

[Obey me perspective]

Mc, who was currently in Devildom’s new coffee shop, or at least, going there through the sea of other demons. 

“OI! MC! Can’t you be faster?!” 

The puffing voice of Mammon called out to them; making them roll their eyes. 

“I’m coming!!” 

They announced, struggling to keep up with his long legs. The unbothered demons pushing them around until Mammon notices and tried to play the hero. 

“I’m coming you little human!” 

He smirks, reaching out towards Mc.

Who in return, raises their hand to hold into his, wanting to get out of this crowd. 

As they open their palm, the sound of horse’s shoes clicking on the ground could be heard, other sounds dulling out. 

A hand from behind them grasping their hand before it could touch Mammon’s. They could see the surprise and fear reflected in the prince of greed’s eyes. 

“MC!” 

He called out turning into his demon form, but they couldn’t see anymore of what was happening;

The edges of their gaze hazing before everything goes black. 

They feels weightless,  almost like they was in the sea. They opens their eyes, seeing nothing but black, until a soft light appears before them. They reached their hands out towards the light, something floating before them.

A mirror…

It didn’t have their reflection, when soon a face has shown up. 

“…” 

It said nothing, just stare at the frightened Mc, it opened its mouth, yet its voice seemingly came from Mc’s mind.

They didn’t understand what it said, before it turned black again, this time, they was greeted by an annoying voice 

“Oh? Human!! Wake up!!! What are you doing here?!” 

They flinched, sun shining into their eyes. It soon settled, making them see the man? That stood above them. 

“W-what?” 

“Come, come! We don’t have time for this, you have to leave! I have been gracious enough to have one magicless student, I’m not gonna have two!” 

“Magicless?” 

They echoed, what? They has magic! What is this maniac talking about…

“Hmp! Come on!” 

The weird masked man yapped, grabbing them by their hand. 

Which finally woke them up, they grabbed the man’s clothes by his chest, yanking him and kicking his stomach, which flew him over them, landing in the grass with a tud. 

Huh.. it looks like what Lucifer taught them didn’t go to waste! 

They scramble onto their feet, looking around. This was a weird place, nothing was familiar. 

“Ouch..” 

The man on the ground grunted, making Mc’s attention snap back to him. 

They raised a hand, quickly trying to summon Lucifer. 

“Hear me, denizens of darkness, you who are born of shadow and you who give birth to it. Hear me and do as I command! I, MC, call upon you to send forth one of your number! I summon the Avatar of Wrath, Lucifer!”

They waited for that soft burn on their pact mark, to see Lucifer’s demon wings from behind.. but nothing came.

“What?” 

They mumbled, completely caught off guard. 

“I’m done playing games! I’m oh so kind to not leave you here by your self!” 

The strange man said, grabbing them and throwing them onto his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. 

“OI! LET GO OF ME YOU BIRD- THING- UH!” 

They screamed, hitting his back. They really should have really listened when Levi was cursing them out..

"Denizens of darkness, awaken! Hear me I am MC the master of Beelzebub avatar of Gluttony I call upon you to lend your powers to this demon"

They tried again, hoping to get Beel’s strength to wiggle out of the man’s hold. But once again, nothing happened. 

“Quit squirming, and let me help you! I’m truly too kind!” 

The man with the weird hat laughed, bringing Mc into a strange looking hall, where they was met with the same mirror that appeared before them!

“Oh hell nah!” 

They yelped when they were dropped before the mirror, glaring up at the man while he talked to the mirror. 

About sending them home? Huh?

After trying to make sense of what is happening, they caught the last thing that the mirror said. 

“I can’t send them home. There is no home for them.” 

“WHAT?!” 

They screamed, making the man jump back. 

“HAHAHA! No! No way I’m redoing all this!” 

They freaked out, there was no way they was going to going through all that again. They wanted to go back to the brothers, to talk with Solomon again,  spend time with the angles! No way they was going to leave them behind!! They still had to tease Luke for being short!! 

Meanwhile they started pacing, cursing out the mirror while rambling to themselves, the weird man had snook out the door. 

Mc patted themselves over, trying to find anything useful, they was panicking; wanting to see Diavolo’s calming smile again! They had to get famous on devilgram with Asmo!

“No! I did not survive those troublesome demons to get dragged kidnapped AGAIN?! Haha! No way! I’m not going to start a new school, leave all things behind again?! I’m not going through that, AGAIN!” 

They huffed, stopping as they started to feel dizzy. Mc sighed, out of breath, turned towards the stupid bird man who dragged them inside. 

Their eyes land on Yuu. 

“… Yuu?” 

They whispered, eyes widened. How.. how were they here?! 

Mc stared at Yuu, eyes wide with tears starting to gather in them. All those nights, spent in tears and sleepless turning. All those moments where they knew they couldn’t stop because they had to find their sibling… 

And now Yuu was before them. 

But how?! 

How was Yuu in this world? 

They didn’t look much different from when they saw each other last. Mc’s could help but step closer to the two, cheeks drenched in salty tears.

“I’m sorry.. do i know you?” 

Their step falters, eyes wide as they fall onto their knees. It seemed like the world was falling apart around them, shattering like glass.

“W-what?” 

They sound lost, breathless and confused. 

“Yuu? This isn’t funny!” 

Yuu looks apologetic. Looking at Mc with a small frown. 

“Yuu! It’s me, (om)y/n!” 

They cried out, hoping this was all just a cruel joke. 

“I-i am truly sorry, but I don’t know you.” 

Yuu repeated, their voice sounding empty in the air against the cries of Mc. They didn’t believe this day could get worse. So many things happened all at once. He wanted to go home, HOME home, back in the normal world and with Yuu and their parents.. 

the soft steps of Yuu’s shoe could be heard as it echoed through the hall. It danced with the echo of the stranger’s sobs, almost like a dark lullaby, trying to lull someone to eternal sleep. 

“I may not know you…” 

they whispered, kneeling down before the broken looking body of trembling sobs . Who looked up at them with- lashes sticking together from their tears. (-their skin sparkling with the salty, sad liquid) [< for those who don’t have hair] 

“But.. could you tell me who you are? To me?” 

“I’m your sibling..” 

They answered softly, as their eyes met, the same eyes Mc had missed every day. When they looked in the mirror and Yuu’s smile faced them.. 

“… I’m sorry for not remembering you…” 

“Why?… Why don’t you remember?” 

They questioned whether this was even real, finding their sibling, only for them to not remember. This had to be a nightmare, for sure! Or maybe one of the demon’s playing a trick on them! 

“I don’t remember anything that happened before coming here..” 

Yuu revealed, sighing as they was about to explain, bird man’s loud voice cut throughout the soft, broken atmosphere that settled on the two siblings. 

“You can all talk this out at Ramshackle!” 

he decided, grabbing both, which earned him a slap on the hand from MC. Giving him a glare that said “touch me and i’ll bite off your hand.”  

The man quickly backed off, not liking this more feral version of Yuu. 

He cleared his throat, putting a hand over his chest, the other onto his hip. 

“Because i’m so kind, i’ll let you, an another magicless human stay here! Aren’t I just the best?” 

He laughed, turning around and walking away while singing praises to himself. Mc’s eye twitched, the strange man reminding him of Mammon’s cocky behaviour.

“Yeah, the best at being the worse… He’s like a worse version of Mammon…”

Mc mumbles, making Yuu chuckle softly. 

“You’ll get used to it after a while. C’mon, i’ll being you to your dormitory.. if you can call it that.” 

“Oh dear…” 

Yuu chuckled, standing up and offering a hand down to them. 

“Shall we?” 

they looked at their hand, a soft smile edging onto their lips. 

“You haven’t changed a bit..” 

they chuckle, putting their hand into Yuu’s palm.

“We shall.”

[sorastar6]

David Protag AU- Character Personalities (1/4)

You read the title! This is basically the personality of each of the drdt characters in my AU. And if you can't tell by the title, this AU makes David Chiem the protagonist instead of Teruko Tawaki (This is not because I think David is better and he should've been the protagonist, it's purely for fun and an idea that I had randomly, I love Teruko <3). But, that's not all that's really changed (a LOT is changed) so I'll basically explain the main points of the AU and then show the character personalities.

So, the Au takes place 5 years after everyone entered Hope's Peak Academy. They graduated, and became former Ultimate Students, which would make them around 24, 25 and 26 years old. In this AU, there's several HPA (Hope's Peak Academy) scattered all around the USA and Japan. Each character are all from different HPAs, and all of them are divided in duos that went to the same Hope's Peak. Meaning that they knew each other for 5 whole years until graduation.

The duos are as follows:

David and Nico Teruko and Xander Ace and Levi J and Hu Rose and Min Arei and Whit Charles and Arturo

Eden is paired with... Someone special (I'll explain someday)

All of these knew each other for 5 years before the killing game. And they had the same mentality that they have in canon drdt when they first entered. But now they changed but not in really drastic ways, but the 5 years they spent at HPA changed them.

I think that's it. Now I can move on to their personalities! There's only 4 on this post because I'm tired

David Chiem- Former Ultimate Inspirational Speaker

David Chiem once held the title of the Ultimate Inspirational Speaker for his uplifting and optimistic personality, but ever since his graduation, he took a break from his career to "rest". Most people already forgot him, except for his most die-hard fans that patiently await for his return, even though he hasn't shown his face in months. He isn't able to return at the moment, as he can't come back in this... Messy state that he's in.

Nico Hakobyan- Former Ultimate Pet Therapist

Nico Hakobyan always had a great connection to animals of all kinds, and they have been getting better and better at their job ever since they started becoming more sociable. They always say that a certain classmate has helped them come out of their shell. But, a lot of people say that they're a little weird, like their emotions are "exaggerated" or "unnatural".

Teruko Tawaki- Former Ultimate Lucky Student

Even if Teruko Tawaki's talent implies that she has good luck, she has the exact opposite, horrible luck. She always has been unlucky throughout her whole life, but ever since she graduated in Hope's Peak Academy, she became quite the troublemaker. She refuses to stay idly and just let things happen to her anymore, so she now fights back against her luck and refuses to let it take control of her life. Quite the revolutionary change, don't you think?

Xander Matthews- Former Ultimate Rebel

A reckless and loud man that truly deserved to have been the Ultimate Rebel. Alexander "Xander" Matthews is what people would call a "hero". Someone who fights every day for justice and fairness, because he believes that the world can be made into a better place. He absolutely despises anything that he deems "evil" and won't hesitate to do anything he can to destroy it. Even if that "anything" could be something that should make him "evil" too...

[word-wytch]

Don't Stand So Close To Me — Chapter 6

Eddie x Teacher!Reader

Chapter 6/? 4.6k. Series Masterlist

✏︎ Your 30th birthday is nothing like you imagined, but Eddie has a surprise for you.

✏︎ Series Summary: Forced to move back home to Hawkins after your fiancé cheats on you, you begin to fall in love again with an audacious 20 year old metalhead, only there’s one problem — he’s still in high school and you’re his English teacher.

While you struggle starting over in a place you never thought you would return, Eddie struggles feeling stuck in a place he can’t manage to leave — until you offer to help him. Of all the lessons learned, the most important are the ones you teach each other.

✏︎ Series CW: forbidden romance, slow burn, smut (18+ mdni), true love, internal conflict, student-teacher relationship, 10 year age gap, mutual pining, sexual tension, emotions, drama, angst, character development, happy ending :)

Chapter warnings: drinking, angst

It was quiet in the early morning of your 30th birthday. Still dark outside, as it always was when you rose from bed at 5:10 AM.

You looked in the mirror, at your face still puffy from sleep. The harsh light above your bathroom sink was bringing out the darkness from under your eyes. Leaning closer, you ran your fingers over your pores to feel for imperfections, noting how large some of them seemed to be, especially at this time of day. There were a few raised bumps too. You couldn’t believe you were still getting pimples at this age. 

You brushed your teeth and washed your face. The cool water felt refreshing on your skin still warm from sleep. You rubbed on your favorite skin cream and blotted some concealer over the spots that needed it, blending it out with your finger. You then brushed on your eyeshadow, curled your eyelashes, and flicked your mascara wand over them, bringing your face to life more and more with each step.

Taking in your features, you looked at yourself for a long moment. Your eyes traced over the lines of your jaw, of your nose, and the shape of your eyes, all coming together to form you. A soft smile made the lines of your lips even plusher. 

Timeless.

Assessing your hair, you styled it a bit differently today.

It was casual Friday, a concept which you always thought was kind of hokey but you would take any excuse to wear jeans for a change, something that felt a bit more like you and less like a costume. You had a pair specifically in mind for today — your favorite. The lightwash Levi’s that hugged you in all the right places.   

You wondered for a moment if he’d notice. Shaking your head, you chastised yourself. Here you were, officially 30 years old, and you had spent the last four days thinking about a thumb. It was bold what he did in the parking lot on Monday, even for him. He’d been sending all sorts of signals for the past three weeks since you started tutoring him, but there was no mistaking this one. 

Eddie Munson had a crush on you. If you had any doubts before, his thumb had squashed them.

It was a common thing for students to have crushes on their teachers. Common enough for Van Halen and The Police to write hit songs about it.

But Eddie Munson was 20 years old, and you had a crush on him too. A bigger one than you cared to admit to yourself. In any other context, this wouldn’t be a problem. In the context of your job, it was an enormous one. At the same time, it was hard to remember the last time you looked in the mirror and felt this way. 

You wondered if he woke up in the morning and decided what to wear with you in mind. You wondered what he thought about as he watched you from the back of the classroom every day. Wondered what sort of scenarios the mind of a horny young man could conjure up on a daily basis, what he imagined doing with you, to you.

You shook your head again, feeling a twinge of guilt. What on Earth were you doing?

Then again, you couldn’t get in trouble for your thoughts. So long as you didn’t act on them.

You sighed and gave yourself one final look up and down in the mirror, turning to glance at every angle.

Timeless.

______

“Come on, come on.” You wanted to kick the Xerox machine. It hummed and sputtered, spitting out the top half of a paper, the bottom half crinkled in a jam, as if it had been hungry and thought the tests for your second period sophomore class were a tasty snack. It didn’t help that there was a line forming behind you.

You had been at work for all of ten minutes and it was already going south. Grabbing the paper, you yanked slowly, trying not to rip it as you un-jammed the machine.

“Hey happy birthday!” said Diane, waving a card in front of you with your name on it. “Off to a great start I see.”

You chuckled and took the card. “Yeah, I think it knows.” 

“I hate this thing,” said Diane. “I don’t need to use it nearly as often as you do, I feel lucky for that.”

Tugging on the paper again, you slowly and steadily worked it out of the clutches of the machine. “There we go.”

“See, it wasn’t that hard,” she said to the machine. “Give the girl a break, it’s her birthday for crying out loud.”

You chuckled and started the copy job again. “Ok, you better behave now. This is the last warning.” The machine whirred and beeped, thinking a moment before it began to spit out fresh, clean, uneaten copies of your test. “There you go, jeez.” You grabbed your card stepped off to the side running your finger under the top edge to rip the envelope. “Thanks, Diane.”

She smiled, “This one’s from the faculty, you’ll get mine later tonight,” she said with a little wink.

Opening the card, you took in the generic birthday wishes of your coworkers in different handwritings and inks. With a soft smile you tucked it into your leather grading binder.

You wished you could have said the day turned around after that, but the copy machine jam was only the beginning. A student got sick in your first period class and the room smelled for the three periods to follow, even after the janitor came.

There was a food fight during lunch period and you stepped in mashed potatoes as you exited the teacher’s lounge, tracking it all the way back to your classroom before you noticed. It was caked into the bottom of your boot and the tissues you had on your desk did a mediocre job at removing it from the crevices.

Your seventh period class might as well have been sleeping. The walls could have given better answers.

By the time the last bell of the day rang you felt like a frazzled mess. You should have just taken the day off.

You sighed and tidied up your desk, filing away papers and loading up your leather work satchel with folders to take home with you. That was when you heard a knock at the door.

Eddie Munson leaned against the doorframe, rapping his knuckles against it rhythmically. 

Your heart skipped a beat. “Hey Eddie,” you said, looking up from the mess on your desk. 

Eddie walked over to you slowly, his dingy white Reeboks padding softly against the tile floor. “Happy birthday,” he said.

“Oh thank you,” you said with a breathless chuckle. “It’s been a pretty shitty one so far if I’m being honest.”

His strong brows furrowed. “Well, I hope I can make it better,” he said as he extended his hand to reveal two small boxes.

“Oh my god, you didn’t have to get me anything!” you said, coming around the front of your desk to meet him. 

“I know, but I wanted to,” he said.

Your heart was pounding in your chest as you took them from him. You turned them over in your hands. They were wrapped in newspaper — the funny section. Your heart swelled as you admired his handiwork before tucking a finger under the tape to break the wrapping.

“Sorry I’m shit at wrapping gifts.”

“Oh hush, you did great,” you reassured, tearing the wrapping off the first box. It was a Black Sabbath tape — Paranoid. 

“I would have gotten you some artists I know you actually like but with these I knew that you didn’t have them already, so…”

“Oh my god, thank you! This is so sweet,” you tore the paper on the other one to reveal Metallica’s Ride the Lightning. 

“I thought that these would be a good introduction to metal, since you said you really hadn’t heard much of it. The Black Sabbath one is their second album, you might recognize a couple songs actually. Dio sings for them now but I figured we’d get you started with the classics and work our way up,” he said with a wink, “And then the Metallica one also has some really good songs on it too.”

You smiled, big and broad. “Thank you so much, this is so thoughtful.” Your arms extended outward before you could even give it a second thought, still holding the tapes in your hand.

In your defense, you would have hugged anyone who surprised you with a gift on your birthday.

His eyes widened as he stepped toward you, bringing his arms around you without hesitation. Not diagonally as you might hug a friend or an acquaintance, but around your waist, guiding your arms over his shoulders. He held you tightly to him.

He wasn’t wearing a jacket or a vest, only his raglan Hellfire shirt since it was a Friday. You could feel him. Feel the shape of his body pressed to yours, of his back as you ran your free hand up and down it reflexively. Feel how solid his shoulders were with the other draped over them. You were worried he could feel your heart pounding through the thin cotton barrier.  

The two of you stayed like that for a long moment, longer than you should have. 

You relaxed into the hug and rested your head against his shoulder, letting out the breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding in. His hair pressed against your cheek, softer than you had imagined. There was that scent again — you were enveloped in it. That warm, intoxicating combination of skin, smoke, and laundry detergent. You wished you could bottle it, spray it on everything.

You didn’t want to pull away. You knew you should but you just couldn’t do it. Not yet. Not for another few seconds that stretched on like a small eternity as you committed the touch to memory.

It was really the kind of hug that you get from a lover. The kind of hug that greets you as you step off of a plane. The sort of hug that molds to you, like two interlocking pieces. You felt him sigh.

His arms where strong and safe, one hand running up and down your back soothingly, the other wrapped tightly around the small of your waist. He pressed his cheek against your head.

Finally you gathered the strength to break away. His hands lingered at your waist as you did. 

Eddie’s eyes caught yours as you separated, they were soft and heavy lidded. His irises were deep and warm like Dutch-processed chocolate. You could have devoured him whole.

You cleared your throat and tucked your hair behind your ear, “Thank you. For the gift.”

He swallowed and nodded, “Sure. Give them a listen and let me know what you think.” He swung his hands back and forth, bringing them together in front of his body. “You uh, doing anything fun later?”

“Oh, not anything big or fancy, just gonna go to Pal Joey’s with a few friends.”

He smiled softly, “Sounds like a good time.”

“Yeah, it’ll be good,” you said, turning back toward your desk to finish packing up your things.

Eddie watched you for a moment longer, as if he wanted to say something more but refrained. “Well, I should probably get going. The guys are all waiting on me, so…”

“Have fun, give ‘em hell,” you said with a little wink as you gathered your papers.

“Oh I will,” he said with a smirk, turning to leave. He paused for a moment. “Happy birthday.”

“Thanks, Eddie,” you said softly. “For everything.”

______

The grey sky hung heavy above the parking lot outside Pal Joey’s as the sun began to set. From your dashboard you could see the warm glow inside the restaurant through the large front window. You watched as the bartender served the two patrons at the bar while Black Sabbath’s “Electric Funeral” rang out full force in the speakers of your small sedan.

You thought about Eddie Munson again. Thought about him listening to this same song, only twice as loud and cruising down a dark road at 80 miles an hour. Thought about him at a concert, in a mosh pit, swaying and bobbing with the crowd. There was a quality about metal that swept you up in it. It was fast and driving, loud and heavy. It was alive and full of energy — much like he was.

You thought about Eddie Munson on a stage. Thought about his quick fingers on the fretboard, how his long mop of hair would shake as he bobbed his head with every strum. You wondered if he sang at all, what his bright voice sounded like in song. You thought about him singing to you — to only you. Thought about him sitting on the couch in your livingroom, an acoustic guitar across his lap, singing your favorite song. 

You thought about how good it felt to be in his arms. How safe you felt in them. There was a part of you that felt guilty about it, greedy about it, but you really would have hugged anyone who surprised you with a gift, student or not. It’s not that it wasn’t allowed either. There were plenty of students of yours in the past who had given you a hug. Some as a farewell on the last day of school. Others who really needed it. It was different with him though, and you knew it. But you had an excuse and the too human part of you that growled in the pit of your stomach wanted to know what it felt like.

There was a shadow in your window that startled you. You turned to lock eyes with the blonde as she waved excitedly. 

“Janet! Hey!” you said, flicking the key to your car to turn it off. You dropped it into your purse and hastily opened the door.

“Happy birthday!” she said as you got out of the car. You could smell her hairspray when she hugged you. “Oh my god, look at you,” she said, taking a step back to admire, “You look amazing.”

“Well thank you, so do you.” 

Janet sighed. “Thanks for being so nice. I’m just going to pretend like this wasn’t the second outfit I picked out after the baby got sick on my first one.”

“No, I mean it. You do look nice!” and she did. The perm was new, not new since you saw her over the summer, but new since you knew her in high school. It had been longer back then, long enough to braid at sleepovers.

Janet gave a weary smile, “Well thanks, I’ll take it.” She folded her arms, a curious look playing on her face, “So, you listen to Black Sabbath now?” 

“What? No — I mean yes. Um, I guess now I do,” you said with a flustered laugh, “One of my students got me a few tapes for my birthday, he’s into metal so he wanted to give me an intro to the genre.”

Janet chuckled, “How thoughtful.”

It was hard to tell whether she was being sarcastic or not. “Yeah, it is. I really like it so far actually.”

“I feel like all I listen to anymore is the Muppet Babies theme song. I’d take just about anything over that at this point.”

You heard quick footsteps against the pavement and turned to see Diane hustling up to you with a cake in a tupperware container. “Sorry I’m late, I had to take the dog out before I left,” she turned to you, “Happy birthday, again,” she said with a little chuckle, then turned to Janet, extending her free hand. “Hi, I’m Diane!”

She shook her hand, “Janet,” she said. “I think I remember you actually, from debate team? You were a few years ahead of me.”

Diane blinked, jogging her memory, “Oh! Yes, wait a minute, Janet… Johnson right?”

“It’s Peters now, but yes.”

“God, it’s been ages! How are you?”

“Happy to be out of the house,” she said with a chuckle. “Let’s grab a seat, we can catch up inside.”

Pal Joey’s was one of those places that never seemed to change. It was like stepping back in time to your summers home from college. They still had the same colored glass light fixtures above the bar. Same old metal beer signs plastered haphazardly along the walls. Same red, threadbare carpet by the pool table in the other room. It still smelled like cigarettes, even in the non-smoking section by the front bar where you were directed by the hostess to sit.

You scooted yourself along the vinyl booth bench after Janet, brushing away the hardened French fry crumbs and gritty salt granules as you followed her. Diane sat on the other side. 

You stared down at the smeared laminated menu. The food hadn’t changed either. It was your typical bar food selection of hot wings and burgers, one in particular called The Beast which there was a contest surrounding. 

You weren’t exactly sure what had imagined your 30th birthday being like, but it wasn’t like this. It wasn’t here.

“Can I get you ladies started with something to drink?” the hostess asked.

“I’ll have a margarita,” said Diane, “Oh, and hers is on me tonight,” she said gesturing to you.

“Oh thank you, you’re the sweetest. I’ll have the same.”

“Make that three,” said Janet. “Oh, and water!”

“Alright we’ll have those right out for you,” said hostess as she scribbled on her notepad and walked away.

You thought about your friends back in Indianapolis. You wondered what they were doing tonight and if they remembered. You wondered if he remembered.

“I’ve got some pictures to show you, before I forget,” said Janet, reaching into her purse. She pulled out a handful of photographs and laid them out on the table.

You and Diane leaned in to look at them. 

“Ok so this is Michael on his third birthday this summer.”

The little boy was towhead blonde, his hair almost white. Pizza sauce had stained his face orange around his toothy little smile. He was sitting in a high chair with Janet behind him, both their faces glowing in the soft light of the birthday candles. You could see the joy reflected in her eyes.

You glanced up at Diane, you could see the ache reflected in hers. You wondered if you were to hold up a mirror to yourself if your face would look the same way. A strange, soft sadness playing on your lips. A gentle longing in your eyes for something that may never come to be.

“He’s adorable,” Diane said softly.

Janet slid another photo to the center of the table. “This is one of Sarah from a few months ago, she’s eighteen months now, which I can hardly believe,” Janet said with a chuckle, “It feels like she was just born yesterday.”

“She already looks just like you,” you said thoughtfully, “I mean I know she’s just a baby but I can already see it.”

You thought about the wedding you were supposed to have next spring. Thought about the photos that she would surely have by then. 

The waitress approached the table with a tray of drinks and that you had never been so happy to see in your entire life. She took your order, just a classic burger and fries. Diane got the mushroom and swiss burger, and Janet got an order of chicken wings and a side salad.

Janet raised her margarita, “To you, my dear. May your thirties be your best decade yet.”

The three of you clinked your salt rimmed glasses together and a smile found its way back onto your face. You hoped she was right.

You took a generous sip of your drink. It went down easy. The lime was refreshing and the salt woke up your taste buds.

“So,” Janet started, turning to you, “Are you still writing? You were always so creative in school.”

“Oh, not much anymore. I guess I just haven’t been feeling that creative lately. Not really in the past few years actually,” you said. “I’m still a big reader though. You should have seen my dad trying to help with all the boxes this summer. He swore they were full of bricks and not books,” you said with a little chuckle.

“Well, maybe you’ll pick it up again someday,” said Diane. “You’ve been through a lot, give yourself some grace.” 

“You’re right, thank you,” you said, giving Diane a gracious look.

“How are your parents, by the way?” asked Janet. 

“Oh they’re fine, my dad keeps talking about wanting to retire but I don’t think he’s quite there yet, and my mom, well, she’s my mom. You know how she is.”

Janet laughed, “Yes, I do.”

“That was one thing about living in Indianapolis, at least I got some space, you know?”

There was a loud clanking that rang out from the pool table in the other room, causing you to glance over for a moment.

That’s when you saw it, the mop of wavy brown hair swooshing as the one who made the noise stood upright after taking their shot. You couldn’t even see their body over the booths in front of you, only the back of their head, but your heart rate kicked in full force at the site of them. At the possibility.

Is that?

Only when they turned around did you realize it was a woman.

You took a deep exhale, trying to steady your racing pulse.

You felt like a fool. What were you doing?

Here you were, officially 30 years old, pining for a guy who wasn’t even old enough to have a drink at the bar you were at. A guy who also happened to be your student. 

You took another generous sip of your margarita and looked down at the table, thumbing at the dull rubber rim. A numbing buzz washed over you.

Maybe it was the alcohol talking, but May wasn’t that far away, when you really thought about it. What if you waited and he asked you out after he graduated? He seemed really interested. It wasn’t an impossible scenario.

Janet and Diane carried on the conversation, talking about their parents.

You tried your best to tune in, but all you could think about was Eddie Munson.

Eddie Munson who looks at you like he’s going to kiss you, who leans in too closely, who touches your hand because he can’t help it and flashes you signals with his in the parking lot. Eddie Munson who was gentle and kind and would hurt somebody — for you.

Eddie Munson who said you were timeless.

You wondered if he would still mean it by May.

You downed the rest of your drink and set the glass on the table. Only the ice remained.

“Woo, that’s the spirit!” cheered Janet. “Next one’s on me,” she said, giving Diane a wink.

You offered a weak smile. “Thanks, you guys are so sweet.”

You were thankful when the food arrived. It gave you something to do with your mouth other than talk. Something to focus on other than your blaring thoughts.

All three of you were quiet while you ate. You could tell that your friends were equally as hungry, probably wrestling with thoughts of their own.

You sat back and sighed after you ate as much as you could manage of your burger and fries. 

“Save some room for cake,” said Diane with a wink. 

You gave her a wide-eyed look and the three of you laughed.

“Oh yeah, I totally forgot to ask,” started Diane, “How did that dinner go with your mom and that guy?”

“So awkward that my mom didn’t arrange another one,” you said, laughing probably way too loud.

“Yikes.”

“I don’t miss that part about being single,” said Janet. 

Diane swished the liquid around in her glass. “I’ll tell you what, I’d be pretty lonely if it weren’t for Remi. He keeps me busy and gets me some fresh air during our walks twice a day.”

“Maybe I ought to start thinking about getting a pet,” you said, running your finger along the wet condensation on your glass.

“There are some perks to singlehood that I miss. You don’t have to answer to anybody, well, except Remi I guess,” said Janet with a little chuckle.

“Trust me, whoever I end up with won’t be expecting me to answer to them,” said Diane, taking a sip of her drink.

“Oh you know what I mean, like have to come home and do things for people who can’t do anything for themselves, husband included sometimes,” she said with a snort, “I love my family to death but it can be so exhausting.”

Diane nodded, “Your feelings are valid,” said the therapist in her. Though you could tell there were other feelings under the veil of her mature response.

The three of you sat and enjoyed your drinks and each others company for a while longer while you processed dinner. 

Then came the inevitable song. You knew it was coming when three other servers and the bartender showed up at your table. You braced yourself, smiling awkwardly while your friends howled the familiar tune, the margaritas amplifying their voices.

The cake was beautiful, Diane had really outdone herself. It was a red velvet cake with cream cheese frosting and sprinkles on top. 

You stared into the glowing candles as they wavered in the air and took a deep breath. Though it seemed childish and unrealistic, like asking for a pony, you knew what you wanted to wish for. You blew out the candles and let the quiet whispers of your heart sing for just one moment, the smoke writing cursive in the air, like a silent prayer wafting toward heaven as it rose.

There was clapping and cheering from the waitstaff and your friends around you.

It wasn’t until after you had taken your first bite of that delicious cake that your server approached you with another drink.

“From the man over there,” she said, gesturing to a young man in a suit with closely cropped hair seated at the bar. “For your birthday.”

He glanced back at you for a moment and you locked eyes with him, feeling your stomach start to turn. You gave him a weak little smile and glanced away quickly, your face turning as red as your cake.

Diane and Janet looked at each other, their mouths gaping in excitement. You wanted to evaporate.

“Go talk to him,” Janet whispered excitedly. 

“If you don’t, I will,” snickered Diane.

It might have been partially the alcohol but you were starting to feel dizzy. “Oh, I don’t know. Go for it, Diane.”

She gave you a deadpan look. “Come on, I mean he bought you the drink after all.”

“I just… I don’t really know if he’s my type, you know?”

“What is your type?” asked Diane curiously.

“Yeah, I always thought it was brooding intellectuals,” Janet said with a laugh.

Apparently it was metalheads with long hair and loud vans, but you weren’t going to admit that out loud. Especially not in front of your coworker. 

“I guess it just depends on the person. It’s never been guys in suits though.”

You stared down at your fresh drink sitting on its pristine napkin and wondered how wise it was to place your heart in such reckless hands.

After all, time moves quickly for young men.

You of all people would know it.

______

A/N: Woof, am I right? We are beginning to ascend the angst portion of this roller coaster and it’s going up and up for the next handful of chapters so strap in. Next chapter is from Eddie’s perspective *rubs hands together*

Once again thanking all of you for your continued support and enthusiasm. It keeps me going every week to see your excitement and reactions so keep them coming, please! I love interacting with you guys, it makes me feel like we’re all on this journey together.

Your reblogs help this story reach a larger audience and mean so much to me! Thank you 🧡

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[devildomditzy]

Devildom Ditzy's Birthday Bash

Here it is, in all its long-as-hell glory.

It's hard to celebrate turning 24, just like it's hard to celebrate growing up in general. This is for everyone that could use this today. Whether you enjoy your birthday, or hate it, hopefully this is one story you can enjoy for yourself.

No trigger warnings, besides language, a very small mention of blood from vigorous teeth brushing, and heavy mentions of birthdays (lol)

Happy birthday to you, whenever it is <3

You wake up to the sound of your screaming alarm, exhausted but obligated to start your day. As you stretch out and trudge to the bathroom to brush your teeth, you remember exactly what day it was. Wow. You forgot it was your own birthday? That's a new one. You shrug to yourself and continue your morning routine.

Birthdays used to be something exciting and important as a kid. Once you started to get older and the years passed by, its significance became less and less prominent to you, instead being replaced with the dread of getting older. Another step towards the inevitable. Hell, with the type of stuff you're subjected to down here in the Devildom, you assume you always have one foot in the grave anyway. Maybe... you should talk to Thirteen about that...

Well, there's one thing you can take solace in today, its the fact that you forgot what day it was. If you were that forgetful about the day you were born, there's no way any of the guys would have remembered. Except for maybe Luke. If he wrote down it in his calendar the first day he met you. And if he was there to remind them, maybe Simeon and Solomon would remember. Solomon was iffy, as he's so old himself you doubt he's keeping track of time in general. Hopefully the biggest fuss they'd make about you would be calling you over to Purgatory Hall for a slice of whatever birthday cake Luke conjured up. And if he asked for help baking it, maybe Barbatos would know too... and he'd tell Diavolo. And Diavolo would make it a national Devildom holiday or something.. You wouldn't put it past him.

And Diavolo would tell...

No. There's no way the brothers know when your birthday is. You don't remember telling any of them specifically. And none of them had mentioned anything about it approaching. None of them had been acting shifty either, and that's saying something. You know at least Levi and Asmo are terrible at keeping secrets. Mammon too if you pay him to spill gossip on any given being in the realm, family or not.

You shake yourself from your daze, spitting into the sink and seeing a mix of fluoride and blood. Whoops. Your thoughts had you brushing your teeth way too long. Splashing water on your face, you attempt to bring yourself back to reality to finish getting ready to go downstairs.

You slip on your RAD uniform and straighten out the jacket. Damn, birthdays are good for one thing. Maybe if you had told Lucifer, he would have let you skip today, or at the very least sleep in. Yawning, you look in the mirror, adjusting your hair so you look at least presentable. You mindlessly open the door to the hallway, meandering as you make your way down to the dining hall. You're in absolutely no rush to go to school. But as you approach the room, something shocking pulls you out of your stupor;

It was quiet.

Like, dead quiet.

You speed up your pace, now worried about what you'd find.

And you're surprised to find Lucifer sitting by himself, sipping on some kind of concoction, eyes meeting yours as soon as you walked in.

"Ah, good morning, MC."

"Morning, Lucifer. Where is everybody?"

He closes his eyes as he begins to sip his drink once more. "Have you forgotten its Saturday?"

You mentally face palm. Right, Saturday. No school. And here you are with your R.A.D. uniform on, looking dumb as hell.

"But it's a good thing you're dressed and ready to go. Lord Diavolo has requested your assistance."

"Oh, with what?", you question. This was out of left field.

"Extra student council work. It particularlly relates to the exchange program, so it will be you going. I will accompany you, of course."

"Oh, okay... I guess. Some kind of warning would have been nice", you mutter to yourself.

"Is there a problem, MC?", he questions in that intimidating tone that kind of still scares you to this day.

"N-no, not at all. I guess I'm ready to go."

"Excellent, then let us be off."

"No! C'mon, I told ya to the left!"

"Mammon, that's your right."

"You know what I meant!"

Hands on his hips, Mammon stands a few feet back, scrutinizing his brothers at their best attempts at following his not-so-clear instructions.

"Well if you don't like how we're doing it, why don't you do it yourself?", Levi snaps from his place on the left side of the Happy Birthday banner he holds in his hands.

"Yeah, Mammon! I don't wanna break a nail right before the party!", Asmo whines on his own ladder, holding the right side of the banner.

"Oh I'm sorry, I don't remember raising a bunch of whiners!", Mammon slides his sunglasses he refuses to take off even inside down the bridge of his nose to leer at the two youngers.

"You didn't raise us at all!", Levi exclaims, throwing his hands up in the air.

"Well I'm older than ya, that should count for somethin'", Mammon says matter of factly.

As Levi throws his hands up in disbelief at his incredulous older brother, the motion causes the other side of the banner to slip through Asmo's hands, half of the letters spelling "Birthday" scattering to the ground.

"Oh, great. That's great. Great job, you two", Mammon crosses his arms, clearly annoyed.

"You know, you're lucky this is for MC!", Levi sighs, growing increasingly tired at Mammon's attitude.

"Oh yeah? And why's that?", Mammon challenges back, not helping the situation at all.

"Becaaaause, if it wasn't, neither of us would be helping you. You should be thanking us!". Asmo remains cheery as he hops back down the latter, carefully bending down to pick up the unstrung letters to add them back to the banner. "You know we're only doing it for them!".

"Of course we're only doing it for them, you think we would go through all this trouble for you?", Satan groans, rolling his eyes as he walks by the three to set down the decorations in his hands, stopping to take stock of what was left to hang up.

"Wha- Now why'd you gotta go and say that for!", Mammon pouts back at the fourth born.

"Can you stop trying to boss people around and actual help for once?", Satan questions, roughly shoving a roll of streamers into Mammon's hands. "Here, make yourself useful."

"Tch!", Mammon grunts under his breath, but takes the streamers all the same, walking towards the supplies and grabbing a roll of tape off the table.

While the halls of the House of Lamentation could already be considered ornate, the boys were doing their best to kick it up a notch. It was a surprise party for you of all people, of course they were going to do everything they can to make it as extra as possible.

"So, is this still a surprise? Or have you already accidentally blabbed off to them", Satan asks, not sparing a glance to Mammon as he began to unroll his own set of streamers.

"Wow, ya really have that little faith in your big brother, eh?"

"Well, you follow them around like a lost dog 24/7. Chances are you already slipped up and told them something".

"W-well.. uh...", Mammon wracks his brain trying to remember exactly what he said to you that could have kind of maybe accidentally a little teeny bit ruined their plans for your party.

"So you did, didn't you!", Levi raises his voice, now taping his side of the banner to the wall.

Asmo takes a sharp gasp as he adheres his side as well. "J'accuse!"

"I-I didn't! I swear! At least I think", Mammon defends himself, muttering the last part under his breath.

Before the other three can begin to press him, the heavy front doors of the HOL swing open, two figures walking in side by side.

"We're back", Belphie calls out, walking into the house, cake in hand.

"Oh, good. How's it look?", Satan wonders, setting down the supplies in his hand to walk towards the youngest, leaning over the box in his hand.

"It held up great on the trip back", he responds.

"Sorry it took so long", Beel says to no one in particular, nodding his head affirmatively.

"I think Beel ate every other dessert they had for sale", Belphie chuckles, looking to his twin who smiles in response.

"Well, thank you for leaving this one in tact", Satan says, relieved that somehow sending gluttony to pick up your birthday cake did not end poorly.

"Of course. I'll always share my desserts with MC", Beel states, face super serious as if to show how important this was to him.

"We'll go put this in the fridge. Need help with anything else?", questions Belphie.

Satan shakes his head in response, a small smile making its way to his face. "No, no. We've only got decorations left over here and I think the four of us have it handled. Have you heard from MC yet?"

Belphie hands the cake off to Beel, taking his D.D.D. out of his pocket to check his notifications, pushing his hair out of his face to look at the screen. "Not in a bit. The last I heard they complained that Lucifer was making them go help Diavolo with official R.A.D. junk. That was about two hours ago".

"Wow, they must really got 'em runnin around. They haven't even texted me back yet", Mammon looks at his phone is disbelief.

"They haven't texted any of us back, Mammon", Levi reminds the former.

"Yeah, but I'm their first! They text me a whole of a hell lot more than you lot!"

"That's because you text them incisively", Satan remarks, bringing a hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose, clearly becoming annoyed.

"But-"

"Can you shut up and keep helping me hang these?", Satan turns towards Mammon, clearly trying his best not to lash out.

"Gah! Fine.", Mammon grumbles as he makes his way towards the back wall of the room. "Hey, fish brain, primadonna, come help me out, would ya?"

Levi's anger begins to boil to the surface once more as he snatches the streamers out of Mammon's hands. "Again. You are so, so lucky this is for them", he spits vitriol as begins to unroll the bundle.

"Exactly, this is for them, so let's try to get along while we finish this, kay?", Asmo chimes in, walking over to help Levi begin to find a place to hang the crêpe paper.

"Right, then we'll be right back", Beel says as he and Belphie make their way towards the kitchen.

"Luke is also bringing a cake, so can you leave room in the fridge for his?", Satan calls out to them as they go.

"Oh, don't worry. I'll make room", Beel confirms, speeding up to begin eating enough stuff out of the fridge so that both cakes could be chilled.

"I didn't mean eat...the entire....ugh", Satan grunts, realizing there's no point in redirecting Beel when it comes to food. He looks to the watch on his wrist to gauge the time before turning back to help the others. He takes out his own D.D.D. and shoots a quick text in a secret group chat you had just so coincidentally been left out of.

OPERATION: S.U.R.P.I.R.I.S.E (12)

Satan: We're almost done over here, what's your ETA Lucifer?

Lucifer: We'll finish up soon. MC is still under the impression that this work is critical for the student council. I believe they are almost done.

Satan: Seems everything is going smoothly then?

Lucifer: I'd like to say that but...

Before Lucifer can finish his message, a picture of a very, very happy Lord Diavolo holding something very colorful in his hands pops up on the screen.

Diavolo: Satan! Look at what Barbatos and I procured at the store for MC! It's one of those colorful horses humans whack with sticks to celebrate! I believe it's called a pen-yada!

Barbatos: Pinata, my lord.

Diavolo: Yes! Yes a pinata! Now more importantly, would any of you happen to have a very big stick?

Lucifer: For... what? Exactly?

Diavolo: Well MC is going to need something to open this up this paper pony thing with!

Barbatos: Donkey, my lord.

Satan: Lord Diavolo, not to be presumptuous but... what did you fill that thing with?

Diavolo: Oh ho ho! Wouldn't you like to know! But that's for me to know and MC to find out, right Lucifer?

Lucifer:...

Satan quickly backs out of the text thread to open one that is rarely touched; and messages his oldest brother.

1 & 4 (2)

Satan: What exactly is in that thing?

Lucifer: I am honestly not entirely sure.

Satan: Great. Could it kill a human?

Lucifer: I doubt Barbatos would have let him put anything lethal inside.

Satan: But do you know if Barbatos knows if its lethal to humans?

Lucifer:...

Lucifer: I will... be right back.

Satan's attention is ripped away from his phone screen when he hears his least favorite noise; the sounds of his brother's bitching yet again.

"It's crooked."

"How is it crooked?"

"What, do ya not have eyes?"

"Well it's hung isn't it? I didn't exactly see you running to do it yourself."

"I'm more of a watch and lead kinda guy."

"IF you'd two would be so kind", Satan starts, aiming his voice at Mammon and Levi, who had already begun to argue again, "MC will be on their way home any minute now. Can you get your act together before they walk in and witness this tragedy?"

The boys grumble under their breaths but stop all the same. They know the journey from the demon lord's castle to the HOL isn't that far, so now it was crunch time.

While Levi, Mammon, and Asmo finish up decorations, Satan, Beel, and Belphie begin to set up the rest of the party, setting out various foods and refreshments.

A knock at the door startles everyone, causing the room to fall to a hush, all eyes now staring at the front door.

"Can somebody open the door? This thing is really heavy!"

A collective sigh falls over the room as Beel walks to the front door and lets Luke, Simeon, and Solomon into the common room.

Beel takes the cake from Luke's hands, beginning to walk towards the kitchen.

"H-Hey! Give that back, you big oaf!", Luke shouts up at Beel who doesn't even question his insult.

"What? You said it was heavy? I'm gonna put it in the fridge next to the one Belphie and I got them."

"O-oh", Luke suddenly looks both relieved and sheepish, looking over to Simeon only to be met with that face Simeon makes at him when he knows he needs to apologize for being rude to anyone. "Sorry, Beel."

"We appreciate the help", Simeon beams at Beel in his own attempt to smooth everything over.

"So, do you need help with anything else? I hear MC could be arriving back at the house at any moment", Solomon asks, directing his question at Satan.

"I believe that's it, besides the presents. Would you mind-"

Solomon cuts him off before he can finish his sentence, "No at all, show me the way."

As the two finish up bringing all the gifts downstairs, setting them on the table across from the snacks, everyone's D.D.D.'s buzz with a text message.

OPERATION: S.U.R.P.I.R.I.S.E (12)

Lucifer: We are almost there. Prepare yourselves.

"You heard the man, everyone get to hidin'", Mammon shoos everyone off into different corners of the room where they would be invisible from the door's threshold.

And they wait.

And... they wait.

And? They wait?

OPERATION: S.U.R.P.I.R.I.S.E (12)

Mammon: Lucifer, what the hell's goin' on, huh? We've been hidin' for like ten minutes now!

Lucifer: Something has happened, give me a moment.

There are confused murmurs and worried looks exchanged as the whole room waits for another update. Another five minutes passes by.

Mammon: Yo! Lucifer, what the hell?

Asmo: Yeah, is everything alright?

There is still no response from any member of the group that was traveling back to the house with you.

"Ugh! I can't take this anymore. I'm gonna ask them what's up", Mammon exclaims, beginning to text furiously.

"Hold it! Give them a minute. I'm sure there's a logical explanation as to why they are late", Satan reasons, not able to hide the worry also reflected onto his face.

Another five minutes...

Partners in Crime (2)

Mammon: Hey, where the hell are ya?

Mammon: You're really startin' to freak me out right now.

Mammon: And Lucifer won't answer his phone.

Mammon: If you're in trouble you better summon me right now, dammit!

Mammon starts down at his phone in quiet desperation hoping to hear something, anything from you. Please.

Finally, after another few minutes pass by, his phone dings back.

Partners in Crime (2)

MC: I'm fine.

MC: And I really appreciate it.

MC: But I kinda just really wanna be alone right now, okay?

MC: Can you tell the guys I'm fine?

Mammon grunts in frustration, annoyed by your nonchalantness about the situation.

"Are they okay?", Asmo asks, worry clearly laced in his voice.

"Yeah, Mammon, tell us what they said!", Luke echos back, also clearly afraid.

"Just gimmie a minute, alright!", Mammon stresses, beginning to type again.

Partners in Crime (2)

Mammon: Whaddya mean tell them you're alright?

Mammon: Get over here and tell them yourself, dammit!

MC: Mammon, I'm fine, okay. I'm gonna turn off my D.D.D., I need to spend some time alone, okay?

Mammon: Ya know, I really don't like it when you're all ominous!

MC: Mammon, I already know. Diavolo let it slip on the way home. I really do appreciate it, but I just want to be by myself today, alright?

Mammon: Now why the hell would anyone want to be alone on their birthday? You're being ridiculous.

MC: Have you ever stopped to think about how I feel towards my birthday? I've never told any of you about it. I don't even know how you found out, besides Lucifer peeking at my R.A.D. files without me knowing.

Mammon: Can you stop being humble just for today? Let us celebrate ya. Now tell me where you are so I can pick you up.

Mammon: MC?

Mammon: MC, ya better answer me!

Mammon: I swear when I get ahold of ya I'll...

Mammon: Okay, I don't know what I'll do. But that's besides the point. We already set up all this party stuff for you! We need ya here.

Mammon gets no response from you as his phone gets a notification from a different chat.

OPERATION: S.U.R.P.I.R.I.S.E (12)

Asmo: C'mon Lucifer! What's going on?

Diavolo: I believe... this is my fault.

Diavolo: I got a little too excited about experiencing a real human birthday party, and I kind of let the cat out of the bag so to say.

Diavolo: I believe whatever I said must have offended them, as they ran off. We we're almost there too.

Diavolo: Lucifer told us to wait here while he went after them but I believe he is having trouble finding them himself.

Diavolo: I'm truly sorry. I did not intend to upset them, especially on their birthday. Though, I'm not exactly sure what I did that was so upsetting.

Mammon: I got ahold of 'em but they quit answerin'. Said they want to be alone

Asmo: Alone on your birthday? No way! Why would they want that? :(

Mammon: No clue, but they seemed really upset.

Mammon: I need to find 'em.

Levi: Are you sure we shouldn't just give them space?

Mammon: Nah, I kinda have a feelin' somethin' else is going on. I'll start looking.

Lucifer: Good luck with that. I've searched high and low and I don't have the faintest idea of where they could have run off to.

Mammon looks up from his phone to look at everyone in the room's uneasy faces.

"Well, how about a search party?", questions Solomon. The room begins to murmur in agreement before Mammon speaks up.

"Nah nah nah, no. I got this. Let's not overwhelm them, alright?"

"Why should you get to be the one to go find them?", questions Levi, obviously jealous.

"Well I'm the only one they texted back, ain't I? They're my human, what kinda guardian would I be if I didn't look for their sorry ass?"

Luke's eyes well up with tears. "I-I hope they're okay... they didn't even get the chance to try the cake I made them...". Simeon places a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"Don't worry Luke, Mammon's going to take care of it, isn't that right Mammon?".

"Yeah, I'm on it pipsqueak, don't even worry 'bout it".

"Oh, that makes me feel soooo much better", Luke refutes in the most sarcastic voice he can muster before taking a beat and adding on at the end, "Please make sure they're okay, Mammon."

"Yeah, I got it kid."

Mammon ruffles Luke's hat into his hair before glancing at his D.D.D. one more time.

"I'll let y'all know when I find them, so keep your ringer on. But don't go swarmin' them either, okay? I need to figure out what's goin' on with them".

"Right", Satan gives a firm nod, one hand on his chin. "We'll be here".

Mammon gives a curt nod back before heading out the door. Well, at least he knows you're not at home, so he can rule that one out. If only this whole summonin' thing worked both ways. He could just appear in front of ya right now and make everythin' okay again. Why couldn't your stubborn ass just summon him? If you're going to sulk on your birthday, wouldn't you like a sulking buddy?

He's thankful that he knows you well enough. That'd he'd be the one to find you, to find you first. That'd mean he'd be first to see you, first to check up on you, first to comfort you, first to hold you.

Okay. He's getting ahead of himself.

Well, there's not very many places a human could hide in the Devildom and be safe, and even less places where you could hide and be alone. And he knows you're not stupid enough to put yourself in danger.

Not without him there.

Process of elimination finds him where he thinks he'd be most likely to find you, the edge of the forest near the HOL. It's peaceful there. You had dragged him to that spot time and time again to just sit and stare at the lake ahead.

He's relieved but not shocked when he sees your slouched over form sitting on the ground, hands picking at and ripping individual grass blades out of the ground while you stared intently at them.

He watches you for a moment before speaking. He doesn't want to scare you, so he clears his throat first. "Care to tell me why ya wanna spend your birthday alone, torturin' innocent blades of grass in the woods? Can't say it's my thing, but it does make ya look kind of weird. But to each their own".

You give a quick little "ha", before shifting your attention back down at the ground, finding your shoelaces now very interesting.

Well, a 'ha' is better than nothin'. Honestly he's just happy you didn't ignore him, or tell him to go away.

He slowly approaches and sits down next to you on the ground, watching you twirl the aglet between your fingers.

"Tell me what's goin' on with ya, huh? It's not like ya to just run off like that. Had everyone worried sick 'bout ya."

You make a solemn noise, not looking up, continuing your fidgeting. "Sorry."

"Don't apologize, just...just talk to me, okay? What's goin' on up there?", he says, exemplifying his point by poking you in the forehead, causing you to giggle a very small amount.

"There ya are', he smiles back at you - but can't hide the concern on his face.

You finally drop the lace from your hand and scoot to face him. He meets your eyes and waits patiently, just like he always does. Infinitely patient, just for you.

You take a long breath, breathing out hard before starting. "I've... never told any of you when my birthday is."

He waits, letting you continue to speak.

"There's a reason for that. I don't... I'm not comfortable... ugh. This sucks."

He puts an arm around your shoulder and pulls you into an awkward -'you're-both-sitting-on-the-ground-criss-cross-applesauce-so-its-very-uncomfortable' half hug. What? It's the best he can do in this situation, in the current position you're both sitting in. Don't judge him.

You look ahead, now refusing to make eye contact as you continue. "I don't like birthdays. Or my birthday specifically really. I don't exactly have... fond memories of it. Like at all."

He waits a second to see if you have anymore to say before he speaks. "Yeah? Is that right?", his face hardens. The idea of you never feeling happy on the day you're supposed to be at your happiest does something to him, and it's not good.

"I stopped expecting to celebrate any of them very early on. It was just another day really. Most the time everyone would forget anyway. So, I just let them. It... doesn't exactly make for the best day."

"So the idea of celebratin' upsets you?"

"Yeah. I guess something like that. I really appreciate what you and the others were trying to do for me, I really do! But... it just brings back awful memories", you say, resuming to pull at the grass around you again.

"I getcha. We all had a problem with birthdays too for awhile."

"You did?", you question, genuinely surprised.

"Yeah, heh. Another birthday just meant another year marking how long ago we fell. And ya know... how long ago we lost Lilith. And Satan, man, he had the worst time with birthdays. He was always so enraged, mad that he was born from Lucifer's image, and he sure as hell didn't want to celebrate that. And we didn't make him."

"You didn't?"

"Nah. We just left each other alone on those days. It was kinda an unspoken words kind of thing. But overtime, we all became more comfortable with the idea of bein' here. We got happier about the life we were livin' now, so it just felt right to start celebratin' em."

"I see", you respond, your grass pulling movements ceasing.

"Do you think you'd wanna give that a shot? Celebratin', I mean."

You stay quiet as he tries to catch your gaze. "We've already got the whole party set up. Balloons, presents, the whole nine yards. Luke even made ya a cake and if ya don't try it I think he'll cry so hard he'll throw up".

You giggled at his anecdote, "He so would not."

"He so would! He was so worried about ya, asked me to bring you home safe."

You sniffle a little. "He did?"

"Yeah dummy, everyone did. If you haven't noticed, we all really care aboutcha a whole lot."

You smile at his words. "I'm well aware of that".

"Then," he stands up, dusting himself off then reaching a hand out to you to help you stand, "why don't ya give it a shot. Now, I won't make ya do anything you don't want to do, but I know everyone's just really excited to see ya. We can treat it like a normal day if you really want. But, why don't ya let the people that care aboutcha take care of you for today, huh?"

You pause for a second, looking up at him.

"I promise I won't let anythin' happen to ya. And if you get there and decide you just wanna go straight to your room, then that's what we'll do. But c'mon, won'tcha at least give it a chance?"

You let out a sigh before giving a small smile and taking his hand.

"Atta human", he beams, pulling you up to your feet.

"Now c'mon, we got a very important human to celebrate."

As you begin to walk back towards the HOL, hand in hand, he wonders aloud.

"So, how exactly did Dia spoil it for ya?"

"He asked me if I'd ever seen a pen-yada."

"Of course he did."

[rulanarinrush]

a few more drdt ch2 thoughts, since i decided to not be lazy for once and rewatch the series for realsies. a follow up to this post.

My thoughts are below the cut. this isn't a definitive theory or anything, just rambling. I'd like to apologize for two things in the original post.

1 I misremembered Levi's family and forgot that he had a father. Sorry for spreading misinfo.

2. My wording in the original post makes it sound like it's completely obvious that a mechanism was used to kill Arei. It could be anything. Sorry if that post sounds brash or conceited.

As always, if there's something completely wrong, you can let me know.

You don't need to read the original post for this post, but I do want to restate some of my thoughts in it in a more concise way.

I think anyone could have taken the grippy tape used for the murder. (this is the part where rose fails the pullups of the recap video). I don't think it disappearing when Ace knocks Eden down is necessarily indicative that Eden or Ace had to take the tape, when it could have simply been knocked to the side, or Eden could have unsuspectingly given the tape to someone. Plus Levi didn't immediately go back to his room as far we can tell from Teruko's perspective, and there's a good chance that anyone in the rooms(but smart enough not to poke their heads out) overheard everything and could have investigated later in the night.

I don't know what's going on with Ace taking the resistance band or Nico (likely) using Hu's wire in their attempted murder of Ace. I imagine that will be elaborated on later.

I think all the motives that I guessed in the original post are still the same. So like Min <--> Xander, Veronika <--> Hu, Levi <--> Arei, David -> Teruko. I think that based on foreshadowing, Veronika and Hu have each other's. (And, assuming either one was telling the truth, they don't have their own based on MonoTV's soft confirmation that he(?) didn't give any of the secrets out correctly. However in the original post I kind of(definitely) messed up by misremembering Levi's family. But I still think that the survivor's guilt secret has to be Xander's because Levi describes his disownment specifically as a good thing, and that he and his family were bad influences on each other. It's not necessarily logically inconsistent for him to both feel immense guilt over their deaths if they died and feel like being disowned was a good thing at the same time, but it feels incongruous with his line at the beginning of the chapter of simply doing "nothing" to grieve. This is also what makes me think that MonoTV intentionally messed up giving out the secrets, because if Xander and Min are dead, why wouldn't you just reveal their secrets as they are? Of course, it could add to the intrigue as it were since the "reveal" technically happens 4 days later, but it still feels strange. (And I think the survivor's guilt secret can't be Min's because she would have no reason to feel pressured to continue being the Ultimate Student if that were the case)

I think the reason Charles specifically refutes the time of death during the cliffhanger is because the note is a fake piece of evidence. Yes, there's only one garbage can on the floor but like... it's paper. You can fold that in your pocket or stick it in your underwear. Or just eat the note. I go into more detail on it in the original post, but basically I don't think it was possible for the killer to have actually known all the information in the note just from eavesdropping. Arei overhears a bit of Arturo's secret, and then intervenes. I think she would have noticed someone eavesdropping or walking past her based on the design of the first floor. The killer could have overheard everything after she intervened, and simply made the conclusion that eden had arturo's secret as he stormed off, and I know that arturo is a character that tunnel visions pretty hard on only the things he cares about, but it feels weird for him to have not noticed someone on his way out. I don't think arei and eden were talking loud enough for someone to have overheard in the cafeteria. and also, the part about a younger sister committing suicide is extremely specific (specifically, "responsible for"). I would not have been able to pull that out of my ass on a whim. I think the murder occurred in a spontaneous confrontation after the david and arei talk, and that's how the killer learned this information. (kind of like dr1 ch2) Supposedly, ASSUMING Ace's account of David and Arei's talk is at least a little accurate, Arei already let it slip that Arturo threatened Eden. I personally don't think it's a super stretch to guess that maybe she let a bit more slip out by accident with someone else. (Also Ace could have saved a bunch of screentime in ep10 if he wasn't so petty lol....). Another thing I want to note is that he says their convo took place at 7:30, the same time as the note. Maybe he's just bullshitting, but I could see this being Charles' "aha" way of leading into all the weird contradictions in this case if the note was actually used. Additionally, the note just feels... off to anyone that knows Eden. It reeks of manipulativeness in the subtext in a way that I think killer Eden would not use. Also, what do you mean "someone else" in the note? (The note is at 58 seconds of ep10) If someone else besides Arturo specifically found out that secret like... who fucking cares? No one really has an incentive to go Eden hunting on Arturo's behalf. This makes me think Arei let it slip that it was a "he" like Eden did, and what the secret is, but not specifically whose secret Eden received. Like an opposite oopsie of her conversation with David.

I still believe some sort of mechanism was used to increase the amount of force used to snap Arei's neck via the gallows, but once again, sorry for making it sound like it's "obvious". I don't know how this mechanism would work, just that it's probably related to the jugs of (likely) fish water.

So now that that's out of the way, here's some of my new thoughts:

The ball of clothes that Charles finds is interesting to me, since the killer used something starch-like to glue that clothes together into a bowling ball like shape, the killer probably didn't have the time to take it apart and just hid it in the dress up room. Anyway, I think the ball of clothes was probably used to get the rope onto the support rafters/beams(?) to elevate either the jugs or Arei(likely the jugs) to a greater height. Either that or it's to extend the rope so that when the rope unravels via the carousel at a very high speed, more force is applied to Arei's neck when she drops. Basically, I think the killer tied the rope to the ball, then threw the ball up towards the ceiling to loop the rope around the beam(? just gonna call it that...) and one time accidentally used too much force while throwing it, damaging the ceiling light. I don't think this is totally unreasonable since while it looks like a bowling ball, clothing is definitely less dense than an actual 13 pounder. Did I pull this outta my ass considering that's a pretty high throw? Yeah. But like, if Levi did it...

I don't remember where I saw something damaged in like this kinda straight line that implies a rope was tied, maybe I hallucinated that so I will not talk about it. (I think i legit just hallucinated an entire clue where paint came off...) But while I don't have any guesses as to what the scuff marks on the ground could be (it could have been a confrontation, but I do think that Arei was probably knocked out in the relaxation room for no other reason than a hunch.) I'm guessing that the reason it looks wonky is bc the killer wanted to cover up a footprint. Hu specifically mentions her heels leave marks, and while hoisting things up, the killer might have dug their heels in to pull the rope. And footprints can tell a lot, especially since everyone supposedly has the same outfit.(beyond just. shoe size.)

wishing myself a very go back in time and tell myself to pay more attention in mechanics class.

anyway. last thing. in episode 2, monotv specifically mentions the ground of the playground is made of the same ground as the turf. So if Arei were pushed to the ground, her body would have bruises but not scratches. This makes sense with Arturo's autopsy. But more importantly, he mentions that the stuff sticks to you, especially when wet. Since the jugs were likely filled with fish water, it's possible the killer stepped in a puddle and got some of the stuff on their shoes. Either that, or the killer took off their shoes because they were well prepared, and it stuck to their socks. or their grippers. don't think too hard about the last one. But anyway, I'm sure the killer learned from Min's jacket hiccup, and if so, that would make Levi extra suspicious since he says he went to do laundry around the time.

I think that's everything I want to say this time. Sorry that this is again so long for something that's just my thoughts and not a good theory. And probably not right. I still think that Levi, Hu, or Ace is the most likely culprit here, with Levi in the lead. Thematically, I don't think it makes sense for Arturo to be the killer since the chapter is about the appearance of being a good person(glitters), since he hasn't really shown an interest in that. Eden doesn't make since(to me) bc of what I said in the original post in that the note is so sloppily discarded. Whit is an absolute wildcard guess pick and while it's possible to create mechanism that breaks a neck while you turn around and aren't a witness to anything, discarding the evidence while walking backwards is a crazy. guess that's just a skill issue for me. Sure there could be an accomplice but I don't think so because I said so. See? No discussion (I'm kidding)

As a joke, I also just want to know. Does anyone know if David ate anything between his talk with Arei and the investigation? I think that realistically he took a sandwich or smth from the kitchen before going to the relaxation room, or ate after talking with Arei, but it would be really funny if Judas showed his "true" colors because he was actually just really hungry without dinner or breakfast. I mean I would also turn into the joker if I went that long without food, so I get it.

Also can someone who knows more about playgrounds explain to me why the fans on the ceiling of the playground spin clockwise instead of counterclockwise. Search engines aren't giving me an answer.

Lastly if dev somehow happens to see this, there isn't a tumblr announcement so I can't really thank you on an account but thanks for working so hard on the rest of chapter 2. I hope your health has improved and your break is restful. And of course, thanks to the staff too.

Here. For making it to the end(sprites belong to drdt dev, and I do not claim the original meme as my own)

[leviscxmkitten]

⋆⭒˚.⋆ Sandbox Love [chapter 1] ⋆⭒˚.⋆

Summary:

"I'll come back for you." Levi had promised, with a pinky wrapped around her own, and then his lips pressed against hers in a hasty kiss. It wasn't their first but it was different, this time felt real.

His uncle pulled him away, and he was gone. The air was thick and heavy without him but his last words left her with a sliver of comfort, the feeling of his lips lingered like a second skin. The seemingly unfriendly little boy she had met and grown with, the first boy she loved - she watched him peddle away with misty eyes. That was her first heartbreak, the one she never saw coming.

He didn't keep his promise.

It's been 11 years since childhood best friends Levi and Azalea last saw each other. Now college students, what were the odds of them reuniting? Will old feelings bring them closer than before, or will it create a greater distance between them?

Cover art by Sumiensp on Twitter! 🤍

Childhood. The years of being young, wild, and carefree; years that are too few and far between. Seemingly endless summer days full of adventure, childish wonder, and friendships that are certain to last forever.

She still remembers the first day they met; their moms being friends from work, introduced them when he was seven and she was just six years old. He had big, unimpressed slate blue eyes and black hair, a carbon copy of his mother, Kuchel.

"What kind of name is Azalea? You're not a flower."

Those were the first words he had ever said to her, which had earned him an ear pull from his mom. It wasn't the best of first impressions, but they had become inseparable ever since. Countless days were spent exploring the woods, riding bikes, and playing pretend. He was a boy with perpetually scuffed knees and too much energy for his own good, and he was her best friend.

"Wait up Levi!" Azalea shouted, out of breath, trying to keep up with him as she ran through the woods.

"Try to keep up slow ass!" He'd shout back, seemingly unfazed by the difficult terrain. That's just how he was, always running, and god was he stupidly fast.

"You're so mean!" It was times like this when she wished the universe would do her a favor and make something — anything — slow him down. Somehow though, without fail, her feet would always betray her. "Levi! Ah!"

No matter the distance between them, it was as if Levi knew the moment Azalea was no longer keeping up, he'd always be right by her side again to help her. "Why are you so damn clumsy? Let me see."

He'd pull her up on her feet, clean off the dirt from her knees, and piggyback her to wherever she wanted. Sometimes it was the candy shop, other times it would be the ice cream shop; sweets were the only thing that made her feel better. Levi knew he babied her, and he knew that she knew he did too, but no matter what whenever she fell, he was there.

Then there were the times when they'd sneak out at night and spend hours staring up at the sky or playing on the jungle gym — sometimes both. Levi had insomnia; his restlessness and boredom must've finally got the better of him that first time he showed up outside Azalea's window. It scared her so bad she nearly wet the bed, but from that point on it became a weekly event. He'd come equipped with blankets and an extra jacket, knowing she always got cold no matter the time of year, Levi always said she had 'shit for brains' for never dressing warmer but really she just preferred the way he embraced her.

Six years went by like this, at twelve and thirteen years old when boys and girls became too different to be friends, they remained the same, always at each other's side. She could have never imagined a day where he would no longer be there, until it happened.

It was a day just like any other, or so it had seemed. Azalea had been working on a friendship bracelet for months, even though she knew Levi would likely never wear it; she just wanted to give him something in return for all he's done for her. She could hear yelling from outside her house; looking out, she saw Levi frantically pedaling up her driveway on his bike, he jumped off, showing little regard for it, and then there were the rapid knocks on the front door. A tall man — his uncle, was running and shouting not too far behind.

Levi had nearly knocked her to the ground with the force of his body colliding into hers. His hold was desperate, his words rushed. Kuchel was sick, and they were moving away to live with his uncle so they could have help while she got better. It was the first time she could recall seeing him so afraid, the look in his eyes was evident enough for Azalea to know; he really was leaving.

"Wait — I have this," Azalea said through her tears, as she placed the little white and blue woven bracelet in his hand. His having a small bead tied at the end with the letter A, while hers had the letter L. "This way we'll always be close to each other."

"I'll come back for you." Levi had promised, with a pinky wrapped around her own, and then his lips pressed against hers in a hasty kiss. It wasn't their first but it was different, this time felt real.

His uncle pulled him away, and he was gone. The air was thick and heavy without him but his last words left her with a sliver of comfort, the feeling of his lips lingered like a second skin. The seemingly unfriendly little boy she had met and grown with, the first boy she loved — she watched him peddle away with misty eyes. That was her first heartbreak, the one she never saw coming.

He didn't keep his promise.

11 years later

"Is that everything?" Furlan says thoughtfully, his arm thrown across Azalea's shoulder.

"I think so." She sighs, and rests her head on his shoulder, looking around her now bare apartment room. This is happening; moving several hours away from friends and family to attend a new university. If she were to be honest, she's really not ready, but this change is necessary. "We should probably hit the road if we're gonna get there before midnight."

"No!" Isabel shouts, her arms wrapping around Azalea and Furlan's bodies. "I won't let you leave, you're staying here."

"It's just ten months, Iz, and I'll be back for spring break."

"Boo, I can't believe you're actually leaving me here to deal with him by myself." She groans and Azalea laughs at the offended look on his face.

"Rude as fuck of you to say that because this place would be a disaster if it weren't for me," Furlan says with an obvious look of disgust as he crosses his arms. "I have half the mind to find new roommates for the next year."

"Come on guys, you can keep it together while I'm gone." She laughs. "Now let's go, we have a nine hour drive ahead of us."

Azalea has never been one for change, it terrified her. For the past eleven years this is all she's known, Isabel, Furlan, her home town; she would miss them, but these extra credits weren't an opportunity that could be passed up.

Furlan was supportive, but he's always had that older brother role despite them being the same age. Isabel on the other hand; not so much. She can't be blamed though, ever since their little quartet became a trio Azalea knew Iz would be the one to take news like this the hardest.

With everything packed up, and the sun casting it's first hour of orange light; they pile into Furlans truck and begin the drive to Paradis.

Even with three pit stops along the way, the hours seemed to fly by. It was easy to keep her mind distracted, thinking about it as just another road trip with her friends — but as the GPS shows their arrival in 30 minutes, crossing over the bridge that officially places Azalea on Paradis; panic and awe begins to set in.

Being a college district the streets are bare of cars; students walking, jogging, and carrying groceries along the sidewalk, multilevel bars and restaurants doubling as apartment buildings. Coming from a suburban area Paradis appears almost otherworldly, not suburban in the slightest, small town vibes with the main highlight being the university.

"This is it?" Furlan asks.

"Rose apartments." Azalea exhales, and closes out of maps on her phone. "We're here."

Inside smells like a mixture of cleaning supplies, musty carpets, and remnants of various food spices the occupants use; the usual for any apartment building, though the complex itself looks well maintained. Not to mention there's an elevator, already a great improvement from the apartments at home, especially with her room being on the third floor.

"31...33...35C. This is me."

"Shit —" A girl curses from another door down, Azalea notices her struggling to grab her fallen keys, her arms full with grocery bags. "Fuck."

"Hey, let me help you." She jogs over, grabbing the keys off the floor, and offers a hand to take a grocery bag.

"You're a lifesaver, thank you." The girl sighs in relief, passing off a heavy bag, and unlocks her door with her now free hand. "Are you my new neighbor?"

"Yeah, we just drove down," Azalea motions toward her friends, who are awkwardly standing by the door and waving. "My friends, Furlan and Isabel are helping me move in, so I apologize if we're a little noisy tonight."

"Oh no worries, are you starting at the university on Monday?" She smiles brightly, her big blue eyes a stark contrast to the black bangs framing around her face.

"Yeah, I'm transferring from my hometown college —"

"She's leaving us behind!" Isabel shouts, cutting Azalea off, and making her neighbor giggle.

"Well, if you'd like, we can walk to campus and get coffee Monday morning, see if we have any classes or free periods together." She suggests and holds out her hand. "I'm Ilyana by the way."

"Azalea," She smiles, shaking her hand. "And yeah, I would love that."

"Cool, I'll come by again to get your number later. Thanks again for the help, neighbor!" Ilyana takes back her grocery bag, and pushes open her door with her foot, struggling to wave as she slips into her apartment.

"She seems cool." Isabel says once Azalea reaches the door, smiling to herself as she steps into her new apartment.

"Right? It is nice to already have made a friend here."

Furlan abruptly throws his arm over Azalea's shoulder, leaning almost all his weight against her and nearly knocking her over. "You know Iz, you can take my truck, I think I'm gonna transfer here too. Do you think she's single?"

"Like hell you are!" Isabel shrieks, her arms flailing around desperately in an attempt to hit him while he dodges.

"Alright, alright! You two are gonna get me evicted before I even get a single item in here, come on, we need to start bringing stuff up then we can order food."

It's nearly ten by the time everything is brought up into the apartment, and when they decide to order from the closest pizza joint. Then after two am when the essentials have all been unboxed and put together.

Furlan and Isabel are fast asleep bundled up on the loveseat, a rare sighting considering the two are almost always bickering. Azalea takes a mental image of her friends, tonight had felt like any other night all together in their apartment back home, but the knowledge that this would be their last night together for a while made falling asleep almost impossible.

~

Morning comes too soon; the sun an unwelcome reminder that the last shred of her home life would be driving miles away today, and it would officially be the last full day of summer.

"Do we really have to go?" Isabel wails, arms wrapped tightly around Azaleas waist. "We can just pack everything back up and go back home!"

"There will be nothing left to take home if you break her!" Furlan shouts while attempting to pull her off.

"Boy I sure am going to miss this," Azalea jokes, but it really starts to sink in, as chaotic as this all is; they're leaving and she's staying here. She hugs them both a little tighter. "Remember this is just see you later."

"Yeah, see you later." Isabel nods, quickly wiping at her eyes as she separates.

"We're just a call or text away if you need anything."

"Thanks dad." Azalea jokes, and they laugh, squeezing each other one last time. "See you later."

"See you later."

They leave, and Azalea takes in her new surroundings. Despite the multitude of boxes, bubble wrap littering the floor, and the lack of personal touch, it felt like home already. All the nerves and anxiety seemingly left out the door along with her friends. This is necessary, she concluded, maybe she'd finally find what was missing here.