#what it also means is im getting a headache:|

[lostandbackagain]

literally cannot recall a single word in german if you asked but I can read a weirdly long amount before I get lost. what does that mean

[moeblob]

Huevember 11

Karen and Rick but in the DND AU. (I just look at this and think 'Barbie learned eldritch blast' but ya know. Whatever.)

[coolnonsenseworld]

I wanted to say that outside of semantics and divisions - I am simply happy to find communities that welcome with kindness - that welcome you by a good heart and not the ability to conform. I am happy for the opportunity to be surrounded by people who care. It's a funny world we live in - making the same mistakes over and over, multiplying the same suffering by billions. I don't think I hope for an utopia anymore, I don't think such a thing exists - but you can't call me hopeless either. And that's what matters.

As a side note - this piece is set in DanceAU, which might be better known to Patrons so far, but still it was the best and most fitting option for this occasion..... also there are 12 DanceAU pieces incoming, because I might be making another calendar so. get familiar with these mutts

[lastofthe20thcenturygirls]

this hate towards im sol is so ridiculous it's actually just funny to me. getting mad at her then for rejecting sun-jae even tho she only did it because she was going back to 2023 and 19yo did not like sun-jae at all his heart was gonna get broken anyway. hating her for pushing him away after meeting him again in uni. and now hating her because she wants to save his life even tho she's literally putting herself in danger to save him??? like she has wanted to save his life from day 1 that's always been her primary goal she went back in time to save the idol who gave her strength to go on at her lowest. she obviously wanted to stop that life altering accident from happening to her and yet she ran out on d-day because sun-jae might keep waiting for her in the rain. it's really what she's been doing from the start. ryu sun-jae the singer is so important to her she always tears up whenever she hears him sing but still tried her best to change his career path because she was from the beginning working under the assumption he committed suicide possibly because of the shit idols deal with. and when she learnt it never was that but the fact sun-jae saves her and got murdered for that 15 years later so she started running away from him. all of this has always been very im sol of her. i mean someone trying to do just what they have been trying to do from the start and getting hate for that... what is the thought process here? what should sol do? just go on dates with sun-jae then when he dies hate her for being selfish and the drama for a bad ending? i just know y'all can't even handle sad or bittersweet endings even when they are perfectly done & make all the sense. also i genuinely think people keep talking about tropes and shit but don't even know breaking up and lying to save someone's life is a very old trope too and it's about selfless love. anyway i think it's just y'all hate female characters otherwise why not call sun-jae a dumb bitch too for deciding to put himself in danger for her

[ef-1]

girlhood

[altruistic-meme]

back on my bullshit: looking through and making edits to my doc full of Issues I Have That Haven't Ever Been Looked Into for the doctor. which may prove to be futile but i will not think to bring any of this up + will absolutely try and downplay it if i do not do this.

i still keep joking that i will hand them the papers and go "pick one and we can start there" as well as threatening to walk out if they so much as breathe the word "asthma" to me. hopefully i can actually do these things at the appointment.

and i know. i know that doctors hate it when you present possible diagnoses and that you should let them do it themselves but like. you don't understand. i have had 22 years of not having anything done when i had a health concern, to the point where i stopped even realizing that things were concerning until someone else pointed out to me that it may be a problem.

so im coming armed and prepared and if the doctor refuses to work with me like im an actual person, then i will leave and i will ask for a different doctor. rinse and repeat until i find someone who will actually help me.

[storm-of-feathers]

I can see why ancient cultures might have been freaked out by that

[ganondoodle]

sorry about that last rambling post, i didnt mean to sound like its worse than it may be, but i got no ... lense to view it through but my own, and the main reason i wrote it out anyway was bc i needed to get it out (even if posting it might be not the greatest idea) .. and bc it kinda showcases, i think, how my stories kinda write themselves, involuntarily in a way? its not like im not putting in any effort- but its like .. i cant STOP it always keeps going and even the dumbest idea stays in some form, its very hard to get everything in place bc theres so much going on all the while i am very slow at making anything, writing or drawing anything, especially anythign coherent is very hard bc not only do i get constantly distracted, i get distracted by my own thoughts suddendly skipping to a certain scene and me having to go throguh imagining in detail NO MATTER how many times i have done it before for the same scene that i already decided on how it goes, when theres a new idea it can take over my entire day bc i cant let go of it-

not trying to sound either like im the only that has that sort of problem, but i think its a big part as of why i start tso many projects without being able to finish them, or even start them bc i constantly have to fight my own thoughts from derailing into another daydream session, thinking of too much too fast than i can ever draw or even write about and not knowing what is worthwhile and what isnt (im telling you i have no idea what is good and what isnt, idk why but for all i know all things i do could be trash, or they all could be bad, maybe the one i thinnk is decent is actually worse than the things i deem not good enough and once i start to think no this isnt good enough i stop having fun making or thinking it bc im trying to do better

honestly its kind of impressive that i can get anything out at all, not to pat myself on the back there but even if i hate how long it takes me, considering how much im having to work just to start working on something at all, the fact that i could post stuff coherent enough for some people to understand AND LIKE is something i should be a little more proud of

[turtlespancake]

me when i write a character who is prone to dooming themself and then they run off and doom themself. core traits are stubbornness and a willingness to disregard their own humanity gET BACK HERE IM NOT DONE WITH YOU

[your-magloving-satinwhistle]

GUESS WHO LET THEIR HAIR DOOOOOOWN!

GUESS WHO'S GONNA TRY AN WRITE ABOUT HOW BOUT FLO AND ARTHUR STRUGGLE TO "LET THEIR HAIR DOWN"!

... No guarantees but like... tis very significant. Yesterday I put this style on Flo (Erumae's style, but with longer locs pulled back), and it felt right! I keep trying to put Flo in this style just to see if I feel comfortable enough with it and guess what! Twas the housefit it works best with!

This is so funny and fitting cuz Flo always has their hair up in a ponytail cuz the partial down style frames their face weirdly in the main look (irl reason), but the housefit is less bulky so the hair isnt too much! For Flo reasons they always prefer a ponytail cuz it's practical, they don't feel relaxed enough to take it out and wear it loose and it makes them look too much like Erumae when it's partially down. And I know I haven't shown it much, but they have a lower mask on all the time. The cinematic scenes took it off, but yeah they're always covering their face in some way and it's for the same reason as the ponytail. It's practical and it's a guard. Security blanket. Makes them feel more comfortable talking to others. Same thing with Erumae, but... less security blanket and more cool factor.

I also wear a ponytail (at work) and a mask irl all the time, but that's just... that was coincidental.... partially.... Remember to mask! I digress.

Now what makes this even better is that I made the housefit specifically to talk to Arthur so the little bug/glitch where my body covers up his face when I talk to him isn't obstructive. The hair I struggle to put on Flo fits it and I didnt cringe. Put it into perspective in the game, Arthur is the only one who gets to see Flo feel safe and relaxed enough to dress down/let down their hair and ultimately let their guard down. Arthur also struggles with letting his guard down too!

I dont know if I made any sense... Idk what Im trying to say, my brain is fried from work but I made progress on fleshing out Flo and their relationship with Arthur! They have something big in common that they struggle with and overcome together! Yay!

[moeblob]

Ohiwe (lady) and Ohime (man) aka the fire deity after they get punished.

Originally just "Oh", the fire deity had a bit too much fun with punishing humans and so in a means to stop them, the elder gods split them into two. So now they have to be together in order to have their "full" power but as before the split, they get restless and like to wander. So while one stays in their city, the other gets to go out and travel and see the world and check on the other deities.

Also, as a whole/singular being Oh would use they/them. After the split however, it's definitely not the same and so Ohiwe likes using female pronouns and Ohime uses male pronouns. That way when discussed as one, it's back to they. That feels best for them.

[delta-piscium]

ow ow ow <- headache

[meatriarchived2]

overview cont. i guess lmao. no one asked but its been something in the back of my mind for a while now & i got an anon tonight telling me i come off intimidating and i feel the need to just. make note of some things so that hopefully if anyone feels a certain way with how i run this blog then like. know and understand both my side as well as that my dms / disc is open for anyone to pop into -- just obv depends on the headspace at the time.

i know this is long & am sorry if it doesnt make sense but. just setting it gently out there.

but, again, my disc ( same as my url ) is open for any mutual. its open to shoot the shit. open for plotting. open for memes. what have you. i may not always get to every message. i may not be in the headspace for certain things or certain energies. but its open for anyone as long as we are mutuals & if handles are different between here & disc then i just get a heads-up abt who you are so i know lmao

likewise, i am fairly fucking slow writing-wise and alot of that is because of offsite issues chipping into me but also because most, if not all, of the things i DO have in the inbox or drafts are from my affiliates at this time ( tho i do have some more from the archive i need to move over from a couple people ). alot of my spoons and drive to write and post is because of the dynamics and plotting built between our muses. im not a blog centered on plotting but, it does help to have a better idea on how to navigate between muses c: esp for those technically outside of my kiddos' texas canon obviously. that being said, anyone is welcome to like any inbox calls i put out there. and my inbox is always open and accepting, even if i havent reblogged prompts in a while -- i have my tag linked on my pinned and its available always & for whomever. it just comes with the understanding that i may take a while to respond to them & they may not get as expansive as some of my posts can get with my affiliates; which again, is just simply from how much we've been building together that helps with that!

on that note. my connections with my texas pals are very dear to me. both ic & ooc. as i noted in my overview post, i talk about the dynamics we've built openly and freely here because theyre so integral to my portrayals. they & their kiddos have my entire heart and i unapologetically love having fun with them and going on tangents with them and bouncing thoughts off of each others posts on the dash.

my experiences in other corners of tumby rp have not been particularly kind. and its been a long time since ive felt comfortable especially ooc with writing partners. and i understand if i may come across closed off or intimidating or unapproachable. i understand if i also come across partial to them / play favorites because frankly... i am. i do. thats because they've built bonds not just between characters but also with me. ill be very transparent and say that i am very particular in who i get close with and that translates into here too. but thats also just something that easily can also happen with literally anyone. again i do understand if i come across closed off in any sense but genuinely? im not scary and i have options open for continuing to grow more connections with people c: theyre open always. what im not going to do, however, purely out of personal experience is chase after interactions. the last fandoms i wrote in i did so and it wore me down into my last hiatus. i will show equal enthusiasm to whats given. but i wont fish for it, either. its just not my cup of tea.

i like to think im fairly patient and understanding in a lot, probably moreso than i should in some cases -- sincerely though if theres issues know that im fine with it being brought up. but im also not going to be welcoming nor tolerate my boundaries being disregarded or disrespected, im already dealing with that with an offsite friend. not dealing with it here. i do not like feeling so uncomfortable existing on my own blog or in my own disc. and i get that already with my personal disc & this offsite friend in particular. im not dealing with it here too.

which on that note, i also wont be receptive with issues regarding what i post, what i talk about, who i write with, who i choose as affiliates or mains or w/e. my blog & my dash are my safe & comfort zones and these muses often help me alot with navigating when my headspace is at a fucked up level. if any of that is a concern yes youre welcome to come to me and talk it over but end of the day? my comfort & mental state is a priority to me. if thats ever an issue i truly would just recommend you do what you feel is best for you. everyone existing on this hell-plane are entitled on curating their space in whatever manner they see fit.

again. i promise im not scary. im not an ass. but i do curate my space to be in my best interest and at my age & experience across the 10+ yrs ive been rping on and off here, ive seen alot, heard alot, experienced alot. i do apologize however if i do come across unapproachable or intimidating. i do apologize if i seem closed off to only a select few. i dont mind if you follow / we're mutuals solely just to keep up with what i write! thats completely okay too and i thank those who are <3 but if i seem unapproachable i literally just gently gesture again to my disc or prompts tag etc! i welcome any to get to know myself or my muses. regardless of how much time has passed since following one another. just again, comes with the understanding that my social battery & headspace often does work against me. and thats not personal against anyone, ever.

[intertexts]

tonight is going to be so cool 👍

[riftsmagic]

I want to enjoy this game so bad bc I paid money for it and I’ve invested 70 hours of my life into it already. but I’ve gotten to a point where it’s SO hard not to get critical every time anything happens. im losing it

[hsslilly-blog]

i think it’s really funny how growing up i didn’t understand social interaction to the point i never even realised i didn’t understand social interaction/social rules and cues/children things. like there’s a plethora of social things that are “normal” that i never got to do growing up. ive only recently realised this by the way bc university forces me to talk with people and i have a lot of difficulty Talking With Them. not in a socially anxious way (im not) but like. with tone and meaning and wording and being blunt. lol im extremely straightforward and people 1. do not like that 2. don’t think i’m being serious (?). sometimes i feel like i live in a different world why do people don’t understand what im saying. anyway random and i’m rambling but i’ve been thinking about this