#what is happening like actually. this is my new favourite season literally every single one of them is off the rails

[jestroer]

Literally like. What the fuck is happening on this server at this point

[thatstoomanysausages]

My favourite activity to indulge in recently in non-stop binging The Crane Wives' songs, especially the new album, and tallying how many times I can somehow link the lyrics to Desert Duo.

At this point it might be a talent of delusion, and I am winning.

Here is a list of lyrics in the newest album that I am particularly delusional about (it's long. It's 2am)

(btw it's every single new song. I am tired as fuck)

Scars:

"All the love, all the kindness, all your best-laid plans/Couldn't stop me from becoming the way that I am" (3rd Life reference referring to Scar inevitable turning red despite all of Grian's plans to keep him alive and safe)

"A fatal fault at the start/Tell me it's inevitable that I'd end up with scars" (3rd Life, when Scar is quickly killed in the beginning by Grian)

"Nothing could have been done/Is that right?" (3rd Life. Conversation between Grian and Scar after the creeper prank)

"Nothing could have been done" (3rd Life. After Scars falls to red)

"Nothing could have been done/Is that right?" (3rd Life. After Grian kills Scar with his own bare hands)

"End up with scars from falling/Down, down" (3rd Life, Grian's final death via suicide)

"We were always meant to fall apart" (Not even one specific series. Every single one of them actually.)

Bitter Medicine:

"Are you ashamed of me, or did you buy what I'm selling?" (3rd Life reference about Scar's scamming nature and Grian's disappointment that hides the fact that he's charmed by Scar. Every. Single. Time.)

"Made my bed but I'll sleep anywhere, anywhere" (Wild Life reference. I think we all know. Pillows smelling like waffles? Yeah.)

Higher Ground:

"I gave up the truth and now I can't take it back" (3rd Life. Grian telling Scar that he was the one that brought the creeper over. Or. Double Life Grian if he ever told Scar about his Secret Soulmate. OR. Wild Life, Grian telling Scar literally anything about the wildcard)

"I didn't wanna hurt anyone" (Oh.)

"The corvids are calling/Warning the forest a predator is approaching/Am I in danger, or am I the threat" (Grian is often characterised as a corvid if not a parrot. Basically any scenario in Wild Life where Grian is warning Scar about the wildcards despite the fact that he is at fault of making them happen)

Predator:

"What were you thinking?/Shouldn't you know better?/You opened a door for an apex predator" (Any scenario in which Scar welcomes Grian into his home and doesn't think twice about the danger the other could be harbouring. His trust for Grian is unimaginable)

"I keep forgetting the lessons I've learned/So I keep getting hurt" (Before Scar won, he never remembered what had happened with Grian, so he went back to him for safety multiple times, teamed with him, didn't mind his company, not knowing the dangers that Grian represents just by existing)

"Your heart is a nasty place/I'm afraid to say no to you" (...Yeah)

"Keep your lies and your denial/I am fighting for survival/My heart is a changing shape/What if I said no to you?" (DOUBLE LIFE DESERT DUO TAKE ME HOME. The 'changing shape' line implying that their soulmates could change their soulbound partners if they really wanted to, and could adapt to being with another if they desired it)

"You took advantage of another anxious people-pleaser" (I can't keep doing this. Honestly, depending on your point of view, this could go either way for them in varying seasons, they're doomed in every universe)

"I keep forgetting that you wont learn/So I keep getting hurt" (And now it switches to Grian on this paralleling line. He forgets about Scar's undying loyalty and falls into the trap of his safety every time, only to come out hurting him or not protecting him like he swore to in 3rd Life. This line goes so hard)

Say It:

"Say it/If it's over, say it/So I can move forward/Please don't leave me in the dark/Praying for a wayward spark" (This whole chorus screams them. They won't communicate. They never officially separate from one another, always somehow intertwined, but neither will finalise their allyship. I need therapy)

"I'm haunted by your tenderness" (3rd Life Grian traumatised by the half-hearted hits Scar was giving because he was letting Grian win, he never wanted to fight, he felt Grian deserved to win because he had done so so much for him. He was completely smitten)

"And if we meet as strangers again/Would you refuse to meet my eyes?" (Grian internally questioning Scar after he killed him in the 3rd Life finale, harbouring more guilt than he can comprehend, literally)

"You know I'm loyal to a fault" (Scar and Grian interchangeably in 3rd Life...)

"I will sit here waiting/Waiting for the axe to fall" (Scar submitting his life to Grian after they are left the last two alive. And also, if you're insane for Treebark, there is a glaringly obvious implication of Martyn feeling incredible guilt after axing Ren down to red, even if he asked him to.)

Mad Dog:

"Keep looking for the end of the tunnel/Never seems to get any closer" (The two waiting as winners for the games to end and alongside it, their suffering as well. They will never be free from circling around each other, over and over and over again)

"We both know the ship is gonna sink/But I keep reaching for the shore/Never seems to get any closer" (They both keep reaching towards each other, knowing that they will never truly be able to be together, especially after the first time where they did, and it ended horribly for them)

Arcturus Beaming:

"My sanctuary to worship the pain" (References the panda sanctuary that Scar built to help the soulmates heal their bonds, only to never complete its purpose with the two that needed it the most, ironically including the one that built it)

"And I am tired of forming a cliff face/Inside of my chest now" (Grian remembering jumping off of Monopoly Mountain and the weight that it now burdens his heart with. This line is diabolical with the right context)

"I'm grieving all that I gave" (Both of them grieving the sacrifices they made for one another, their sacrifices only making their relationship more strained overtime)

"A mirror image of us here, but they're pointing up at our sun and/Asking themselves/What exists beyond, beyond, beyond, beyond?" (Other versions of themselves in different life series looking at their 3rd Life selves and wondering what it was like to be so tightly allied)

"But there's still time, it's not too late/Nothing will change until I change" (Grian's attempt at teaming with Scar in Limited Life, savouring the time he had with him before killing him. He will never change their bond, he is always destined to kill him one way or another)

Time Will Change You:

"Planting hearts in a grave/Pray they grow after it rains" (Grian burying all his allies, hoping that as he digs their graves, he can heal their broken bonds, the cracks only caused by himself. This can unfortunately apply to a lot of Grian's allies, but Grian and Scar's relationship tries to heal itself each season)

"Someday/Time will change you/You'll leave behind what doesn't move" (Someday Scar will remember and he'll leave Grian behind once he realises that Grian was never able to move on, and that his heart is still stuck neck deep in the sand where both their bodies laid at the end of 3rd Life)

"Give me a chance to get this right/I'm learning how to let go" (They're learning, but they'll always fail, no matter how many chances)

Black Hole Fantasy:

"There's a black hole in the living room floor/I keep trying to ignore, but it's growing" (Their need to team and interact is overwhelming, and the longer they ignore one another, the larger their need will get)

"If love is just a chemical reaction/Is there a pill to take? Something to quell this ache?/ Is this the real thing or a distraction/Is it worth the risk?/My life would detonate" (Mmmmmm I'm losing it here)

"I'm on my way to your house, I can't wait anymore" (Yeah.)

"My knuckles hesitate an inch away from the door/What happens when it opens?" (They've spent so much time apart and away from one another that they feel fear that the moment they reconnect, it won't be the same as it was in the desert)

"And on the other side is another life/A version of me with a spark in her eyes that I don't have" (Looking back to 3rd Life when everything was simpler and happier)

"You pull me in your arms and I feel your heart pounding/I take a step back to catch my breath/And we look at each other and double over/And laugh, and laugh, and laugh" (Yeah. Just yeah. This whole verse makes me sob)

Red Clay:

(Already I want to make a link to 'red' and Scar's existence in 3rd Life being very red)

"Blistering sun, my sweat soaking my clothing" (THE DESERT???)

"We don't have to do this the hard way" (We don't have to battle to the death bare handed. We don't have to.)

River Rushing:

"I know I can't grow with a hand around my throat/Hold yourself steady/Whenever you're ready" (Reference to their fight to the death in 3rd Life)

This entire song is just a narration of their fight honestly and it makes me violent.

[nsyncat]

OK, so this is my first post EVER since I joined Tumblr like ten years ago. Always been a lurker, enjoying all of the wonderful things here, the gifs, fics, ships, art, all the knowledge and all the amazing heritage posts, but never posting and hardly reblogging, I don't know why, was always afraid I would make a mistake or reblogg incorrectly...

Anyway, the reason this is my first time posting is because THAT amazing moment that happened a week ago, and I've been losing my mind ever since, and unfortunately I have nobody to share this excitement with that will understand... So I had to get it out somehow, and here seems like the perfect place to do so.

I don't know if anybody will read this or pay it any attention, but never mind, I just have TO. GET. IT ALL. OUT!

So I've been a loyal fan of 9-1-1 this past six years, got hooked to these kind of first responders dramas, also Station 19 and then of course Lone Star. I fell in love with the writing, the drama and action, the characters of course, the emotional and moving stories, both of the regular cast and the people in the emergencies (am not afraid to admit that I cried more than a few times, especially when I was pregnant... woooh, that was a tough season for me).

Anyway, like everyone else, got invested in Buck's storyline and of course hopped on the Buddie train in season 2. And obviously there was something between them, and the fandom always clowned themselves that "in the next season SOMETHING is going to happen!" and I always wanted to believe it, and also fooled myself a few times but always was the cold harsh realist and realised it was not going to happen... But enjoyed the ride nonetheless, read amazing fics, saw wonderful fanart, read interesting breakdowns and analysis.

And then 704 happened and I'm not joking or exaggerating, my life changed!

Confirming that Buck is Bi was amazing! I'm ashamed to admit that I really thought it won't happen, EVER! So I still can't believe it actually happened (thank you soooo much ABC!) and like a lot of you, I've been on cloud nine this past week and can't wait for tomorrows episode (also not from the US), literally counting down the hours.

And look, I love Buddie, I really do, but I fell in love with TEVAN (my favourite one yet) 😍 and been OBSESSED with them this past week. Just from those few moments between them and what we barely know that is going to happen the next episode, I truly fell in love with them and really hope they make it as far as they can. I think its an amazing thing for Buck and also CANT. STOP. WATCHING THE KISS! The actors did an incredible job, especially Oliver, also with his spoken support of the storyline and his love for Buck. Such a KING! So this whole thing is huge.

And I have a one-year-old, my life is hectic with taking care of a little human being, a hubby who is also very busy, work, family and a million other things and this past year with a heavy heart I kinda neglected reading fics, and it was my main hobby, my escape, my one and constant thing in my LIFE since I was 12. I do read here and there, but not like I used to, reading hours and hours and into the night, multi chapters and long oneshots, in multiple fandoms, and now whenever I do get to read something once In a blue moon I'm not fully invested or enjoying it because either I'm tired or have something else more important to do. And unfortunately, eventually I noticed that I lost this fire, the passion in me and it left me sad and heartbroken...

And then something incredible happened. Ever since that earth-shattering kiss, the fire and passion came back! Holy shit! I've been reading and ENJOYING fics nonstop this whole week, I can't concentrate on work thinking about everything and reading in-between tasks, I use every single free minute I have to search new fics and scroll through the tags, I go to sleep late because I need to read just one more fic(!!!) even tough I have to wake up very early in the morning and I DON'T EVEN CARE. I'm thinking about it sooo much and imagining new scenarios in my head, and feeling giddy and happy, in a good mood a lot of the time, more optimistic, knowing I have a new and exciting place I can "escape" to, like I had in the past.

Its not that i'm not happy, I have an amazing son and a wonderful husband and I cherish every moment with them, but these are hard and difficult times and life can be hard and stressful and I'm a different kind of happy... So these past few days have been nourishment for my soul and my mood, it sounds so silly but its true! I'm feeling a bit like my old self and it's amazing.

And if someone did read this or did pay attention and got to this point, sorry for the long rant and thank you so much for the patience and understanding 🙏 I love you and wish you a wonderful weekend and happy Buck's-first-date-with-a-man day! 🥰

So I want to thank, from the bottom of my heart, ABC, Oliver, Lou and you crazy lot for resurrecting my old fangirl self 😌 I'm so grateful for all your posts, your takes, your similar enjoyment and of course your amazing fics you're writing and sharing 🩵

[paperstorm]

I want to give that previous anon a hug because I know it’s just been one episode but damn I feel the same way, that TK has been shuffled to the side- like I’m happy for Carlos and Rafa deserves all the flowers and more but in one of the interviews Rashad said TK’s big story this season is the Jonah thing and that isn’t even happening until the seventh episode and it’s like- is TK just going to be sitting and waiting for Carlos to call until then?

And it’s just- Enzo and Jonah were not mentioned ONCE in season four- they didn’t attend TK’s wedding- why do they get to be his main story in the last season that we will ever get?

And for me it’s that TK and Owen were the cornerstone of the show and now it feels like that relationship doesn’t matter - like this is the second season premiere out of all five where they didn’t share a single scene - the other time this happened was season three- which was also a season of there were literally SO MANY times where an Owen and TK scene should have been included but wasn’t.

And I can hear it, I know I’m being a bitch and unreasonable, and I know it’s for other reasons (information you didn’t ask for and you might hate me for sharing; I also relate to TK a lot because my parents divorced when I was seven and I had a parent take a new partner immediately after- and two weeks ago my dad calls me and tells me that he and the woman he’s been with for twenty four years are splitting up/ like for fucks sake you aren’t supposed to go through your parents divorcing twice in one lifetime)

And no offense to Wyatt but for us to see more of him than TK- like I want to get there- but the knowledge that there are only eleven more episodes we’ll ever get- its not enough time.

Hugs for both of you and anyone else feeling this way. I don't think you're a bitch or unreasonable, I think it's very reasonable to feel upset because you're worried your favourite character is being sidelined. And I'm so so sorry about your own dad. That fucking sucks, it just does and there's no way to put a positive spin on it.

The only thing I can really say as advice that no one asked for is to just wait and see. This fandom has a tendency (not you specifically but as an overall thing that I really notice) to do a lot of jumping immediately to the worst possible conclusions and then not really learning the lesson when it turns out they didn't need to worry. We'll get a screen shot - like the one of TK frowning at the taco truck - and people instantly decide that something terrible is happening to TK in that scene or Carlos is disappointing him etc because TK wasn't smiling for that one split second, and then the scene airs and that's completely not what was happening, and then it will happen again the next time we get a still. It happened constantly during season 4.

We just really don't know what's coming! It sounds to me like the Enzo stuff is actually going to be about TK and Owen, because the reappearance of TK's surrogate second father is going to make them both confront the fact that Owen wasn't around when TK was a kid. It sounds like the Enzo thing could make TK and Owen even stronger and even closer. If it turns out that TK doesn't have much to do in this season then that will suck and you'll have every right to have feelings about it. It just to me seems so harmful to yourself, ultimately, to decide things are going to be shitty before those things have even happened.

[leffee]

resending the ask about lps fic recs! :]

Yes, thank you! I already had a list done and then I deleted the ask like a dumbass and was scared my efforts would come to waste. So I might have went a lil overboard, but on the other hand, you might have a bigger choice if you haven't read those. There aren't many lps fics unfortunately so if you ever looked for them you might have seen a lot of them, but I tried. A lot of them are of course Vinnie/Vinnil-centric though because I'm biased. And a lot of those are unfinished, unfortunately.

First of all:

LPS High School AU

Littlest Pet Shop: High School AU

Both of those are done by two different authors who, if I understand correctly, are friends and so the stories are similiar in some ways which was mutually agreed upon. Just so you know. But they are literally so good omg and you know what's even better? They are still being updated to this day. Rather sparily but still, they are on-going in the holy year of 2023! Each of those authors also have a correlating story but in the style of a chatroom. Here they are respectively:

LPS Chatroom

LPS High School AU: Chatrooms

The first author also has this book with kind of different Aus and stuff with those lovelies:

Littlest Pet Shop Human AU: Side St...

Now some stuff from ao3:

Fame, Love & Drama - just short, unfinished Vinnil fic, honestly it's very adorable (there's a tiny bit of nsfw in there, unfortunately for me)

Stupid With Love - I don't exactly remember much about this one, but I do remember enjoying it, plus it's a Russell x Vinnie one and that's always welcomed

Can't Sleep Love - this one is an absolute materpiece and the most important one amongst all those, seriously, if you haven't yet I really, really recommend it. It is genuinely so good and filled with realistic feelings and I absolutely love it. I hope every single day it updates because it's just too good. Oh yeah, it's Vinnil.

Crush Roulette - just a cute shot with a lot of crushes.

A New Home - okay, this one, to summarize i,t is kind of what if the pets met their half-human counterparts. But besides that there's a lot of Blythe and those humanized pets interactions and especially with Vinnie.

warm embrace, cold soul - an one-shot, this one focused on Vinnie and his cold-bloodness (which is basically my favourite thing ever). Very cute, platonic Sunil and Vinnie.

Some of that old fanfiction.net goodness:

Surname, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - basically a cute Vinnil one shot

Spines, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - my stars the tasty Vinnie angst mmmmmmmmm, there's Sunil x Russell and Vinnie's not happy :( it's basically a perfect combination of understanding and angst

Waiting, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - basically a description of the pets missing Blythe after her departure to F.U.N. at the end of season 1. Actually really well written and sweet.

Breaking Chapter 1: The break, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - what do ya know, another Vinnil one with that sweet sweet mostly Vinnie angst. Definitely one of my favourite lps works.

Holding Hearts, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - Sepper happens and Vinnie is really, really not fucking happy. It's short but absolutely wonderful and has that little bit of Penny and Vinnie which I absolutely love.

Littlest High Chapter 1, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - this one I actually recommend chapter 4. It's an OC x canon based fic which I don't like in general, but chapter 4 is basically about the main seven (as humans) talking about their over-the-top fucked up life xd. No, but it's actually good, and some of my headcanons are at least based on this thing.

Something About Pirates Chapter 1, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - Vinnie and Sunil are adorable and Russell goes insane. Yeah.

Littlest High Chapter 5, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - just a fanfic with humanized pets attending high school while the humans from the original are teachers. Basically a highschool fic but I liked it. (Plus is clearly makes Vinnie the shortest and I live for that. Yeah, I'm biased)

Warmth, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - oh boy, another very sweet Vinnil one-shot, and again, Vinnie's cold blood is an important point and I am in love.

HouseCity101 REQUEST - Only for Zoe - a Vinnie x Zoe Fanfiction, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - ok, surprise surprise, this and is Vinnie and Zoe one. Basically, Vinnie tries to change himself for Zoe and trying to be better than Digby. Yeah. Good thing.

Being a guy, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - a big, juicy Vinnie angst (starting to see a pattern here? I love traumatizing him ^^) and Sunil and Russell are worried. And angry.

Choose Your Ship Chapter 4: Zoinnie, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - this one is just a few one-shots with different ships. Good one-shots. And yes, there's another Vinnie x Zoe.

Opposite Personalities Chapter 1, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - just a fun story with pets having their personalities changed 180. Very much unfinshed though.

Little Moments Chapter 1 - Sunil, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - absolutely adorable stories with Blythe caring and loving the lps pets. More like Russell and Sunil because there are 2 chapters but they are lovely. Especially the Sunil one.

Will You Go With Me? (Re-Edit), a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - another Vinnie x Zoe one-shot. It's short, it's sweet, I like it.

Sunil's Romantic B-day, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - this was absolutely my favourite one-shot when Sunil was still my favourite character and, oh yes, he was for quite a while. Vinnil of course.

The Trials of Vinnie Terrio, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - another very much unfinished fic about Vinnie becoming smart because of that classic bonk on the head. We were robbed of such episode, tell me I'm wrong.

LPS College AU Chapter 1, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - the pets go to college, yes, as pets. Very Sunil and Vinnie centric thing but others are there as well. I derived some of my Vinnie headcanons from there, and yup, there's angst which is unrequited love mmmm my favourite.

Vinnie Falls For A Monkey, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - a lot of Vinnie/Minka interactions but in a sort of angsty manner. It's kinda hard to describe it, but it's just really good, believe me. They argue :o

College Boys Chapter 1: Work it Off, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - basically a few stories about the boys in college with each chapter focusing on a different one. Adorbs.

The Hunger Games Chapter 1: The Lives Beforehand, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - okay, okay, this is something else entirely. It's like Hunger Games with the humanized pets. It's actually really, really good! I kid you not I had been craving something like that for a long time when I started liking the show and this person delivered. It's very well-written with long chapters and deep indications. Very much unfinished though :(.

I Love You, a littlest pet shop fanfic | FanFiction - another Vinnil one-shot with them being adroable and others being happy about this :>

My fingers ouchie now. Worth it though. Hope you find something for yourself that you haven't seen yet and like :>

[theavianlady]

Thank you so much for making such a fantastic art piece! Every single detail is incredible!!! I've stayed at it hour what adds up to literal hours today

I'm amazed with the work you put into it. I hope that the asks that I answered were helpful for you. I'm very impressed at how thorough you were in your research. The whole drawing is just SO COOL and I DID cry as I stared at it because of the loving detail in literally every pixel

Again, IT'S ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE! THANK YOU SO MUCH!

You are very much welcome! I had so much fun, and all of you are making me blush. So worth it.

Oh, jeez. More under the cut; I can't keep anything short.

====================================

Being completely honest, I spent so much time on it over the last few days (first piece I've finished on a deadline, too), that I now have no clue what to do with my life. I'm lost.

And honestly, I'm liking it more and more the less I look at it. I knew I was biased (I see gore-covered-turtles when I close my eyes).

====================================

The details have always been my favourite part. It's the little things that really breathe life into art. It's like telling a story. Whenever I write, I find myself drawing parallels between drawing and writing. Like word choice and colours. Sentence structure and contrast. It's incredible how the smallest little things can completely change a piece.

My sister loves writing as well, and she plans this stuff way more than I've seen anyone do before. Like, she has exact dates and times when stuff happens, so she can make sure it makes sense. So-and-so gets together with so-and-so on this day, they have their first kiss a month later, so it'll be in a winter setting, etc. I aspire to achieve that level of detail one day. A good example of planning like this could be @/kathaynesart's timeline for Replica. Like, most of those events won't be focused on, only mentioned in passing, but it's so helpful to actually understand what's going on in the background.

Also the details are just the easiest part for me. No tricky anatomy, just a lot of time and fun.

====================================

And yeah! I love research. A lot. One of the things I'm kind of working on a bit is going through the different human and testudine systems and comparing them to figure out what would make sense in TMNT (I call it: "Chelonian and Human Comparative Anatomy and Physiology").

(Chelonian and testudine both mean turtles. Testudine is taxonomic and chelonian is more general.)

I showed my uncle a diagram of skin I spent forever drawing, and he was like, "It's Saturday. In the middle of summer." Lots of people think I'm weird. I love it.

====================================

And yes, those answered asks were incredibly helpful. I was very impressed with that whole chart you made, and I'm relieved you already had it. I had like, a whole list on the canvas while I was drawing to make sure I didn't forget anything.

Also, side note, I was also (also also also. So many alsos.) the anon who asked what timezone you were in. And guess what? I'm also in MDT. And also have an unreliable, chaotic, and probably really unhealthy sleep schedule. And then you were talking about the new season of the Dragon Prince, which I just binged, and I'm constantly being shocked by how many people in this fandom I have things in common with, holy cow.

...I wonder where the phrase "holy cow" came from. It's so weird.

[nemainofthewater]

Halfway through and The Emperor of Southern Qing is currently in the lead with 25.9%, followed by Emperor Wen with 21.7%, and then Xiao Xuan in third with 16.1%.

Tag propaganda under the cut

The Emperor of Southern Qing

#the joy of life emperor is not only entertaining he is also the single most terrifying emperor I’ve ever seen in a drama#he’s hypercompetent to a high degree#you can never tell in a scene whether his temperament will be being amused by fan cian’s actions or angry and upset#he controls literally everything by @bitterfrosts

#the joy of life emperor is not only entertaining he is also the single most terrifying emperor I’ve ever seen in a drama#<- prev#yes. I love him#but he is genuinely frightening in himself#Dinner with him would be great#but only if we were both required to be frisked and pass through airport scans and put on new clothes we were given#and then be served by the kind of professional waiters who normally handle catering at high-stakes international negotiations#maybe I'll have dinner with Xiao Xuan instead by @nineveh-uk

#qing-di sweep!!!#most terrifying of emperors but very fun to watch#joy of life#tumblr polls by @trisshawkeye

#joy of life emperor my... uh... can I say beloved here?#man is a schemer and spends half his time in his pyjamas and the other half playing 10D chess#very entertaining.#jol by @muninnhuginn

#voted for the emperor of southern qing (JOL)#but i do also enjoy emperor wangxuan (ALON) a lot... one of zhang ping's boyfriends 💖#JOL tho i spent so much time being like “what is this guy's deal” and also “wow he doesn't give a fuck”#he has some kind of extensive spy system and seems to know everything going on in season 1?? also he blew himself up once#and his interactions with fan xian & fan jian & chen pingping are *so* interesting by @marquisguyun

#the emperor of southern qing for sure#man shoots arrows across his study and plays with gunpowder#he's in his pajamas half the time#he knows everything#what is this man's Deal by @noswordinourlake

Emperor Wen

#emperor wen#he's just so funny. putting his guys (his adopted son and the girl he has a crush on) in situations#world's number one shipper by @minnarr

#emperor wen!#he’s one of us#if he knew what fanfic was he’d be writing that all day#as it stands the second his adopted son finally likes a girl he ships it SO HARD and it’s incredibly funny to me#love like the galaxy#emperor wen#polls by @auroramagpie

The Mingde Emperor

#aaaaah#bixiaaaaaaa#this is even harder than choosing my favorite eunuch#out of loyalty I voted the Mingde Emperor#but if I was feeling more literal I would have went for his father#because he is so enjoyable to watch with his smirk and his hands and his everything#xiao ruojin#xiao xuan#xiao zhongjing#emperors#poll#propaganda#my gifs by @feng-huli

Cao Rui

#AA cao rui mention#i stan insane emperor that dresses as his mom is normal about his dad and makes love with his eunuch by @caozihuanismyson

The Chenghua Emperor

#chenghua emperor solely because he had to deal with tang fan by @unfortunatelycake

Xiao Xuan

#Xiao Xuan is one of those 'terrible person excellent character' types#very fun to hate#competent enough to be an actual threat#incredibly satisfying to see him go down by @octarina

#nirvana in fire has this#admittedly I'm not familiar with all of these#but xiao xuan is the most vital part of this entire story#its about MCS but when you have to leverage every single act against the emperors reaction AND use that to gain what you need#that makes xiao xuan very fun to watch because he is vital to the story#he is so well acted too#he brings very real tension to incredible scenes in a heavy weight cast while being very believably painfully human by @pinkbalrog

#xiao xuan is just so!!!!!! everything that went wrong happened because of you!!!!!#blah blah blah your favourite son died and you never got over it HE DIED BECAUSE OF YOU#blub blub your sister and your wife and your bff all died THEY DIED BECAUSE OF YOU#BECAUSE YOU FORCED THEM TO DIE#wahhh your other bff hates you BECAUSE YOU FUCKING SUCK. YOU'RE THE REASON YOUR ENTIRE POLYCULE (-1) IS DEAD#and yet. and yet. when he cried during that final confrontation i felt that. i cried along with and for him 😢#also i laughed when he played stupid and gasped when he showed his ruthlessness. but mostly i clutched my pearls#nirvana in fire by @dreamsaflame

Emperor Wangxuan

#i voted for the mingde emperor but that was yesterday. or two days ago#today i have new appreciation for the emperor in#a league of nobleman#i love that guy by @fire-burning-brighter

Other

#I'd like to nominate Emperor Taizong from The Long Ballad#he's a bad father but he Cares. So. Much#and they say he was a good emperor too despite starting out killing his brother and all that#plus thanks to this show I felt so knowledgeable when I started reading Journey to the West lmao#I voted for Chenghua though#who actually seems to be a competent emperor (with the court he's got)#and there's that scene with his hair down#very enjoyable indeed#poll#cdrama#the long ballad#the sleuth of ming dynasty#emperors by @marilearnsmandarin

#shaking hands with prev re: their tags esp. about the chenghua emperor having his hair down.#but also there is a really nice animated show called No Doubt In Us with a fun emperor/empress situation. you can watch it on viki.com by @oodlenoodleroodle

#anyway Qianlong from Yanxi is my favorite he's such a clown of a man by @tavina-writes

The wording of this week's poll is very important!

Good or bad, no one can deny that in a court drama, the Emperor is often incredibly important - he's the central authority, the one with the power. Sometime's he's inept, sometimes he needs a painkiller to deal with all the shenanighans and, the rarest of all types, sometimes he's a good ruler.

Whichever the flavour, the best thing an Emperor can be is entertaining!

*Most enjoyable to watch, not necessarily a good person

**(If I get the Emperors' titles wrong, please forgive me! I'm trying to standardise across the series but there isn't always a consistant/any title that i can find, and I'm finding it tricky to differentiate between reign names and temple names, especially for Emperors with no historical counterpart)

***I haven't read the novel of a League of Nobleman so I don't know what the Emperor's book counterpart is like but I thought I could add the Emperor from The Imperial Uncle into the same category as it's the same universe

Propaganda, write-ins, and examples heartily welcome!

[d2kvirus]

17/1/24 Fact or Fiction

Statement #1: John Wick: Chapter 4 was the best movie of 2023. ABSTAIN - As I haven't seen it (or, you know, John Wicks 2 or 3) I can't say whether it is or is not the best film of 2023, though I can say it would have to be pretty bloody spectacular to dislodge Oppenheimer, Godzilla Minus One or Suzume (due to the UK release being in 2023, it counts) from my personal top three. Thought there is one way to say John Wick 4 was the best film of 2023, and that is if I say that The Stray's was my second-favourite film of 2023, with literally every other film (including ones I haven't seen) ahead of it. You get the feeling that I thought The Strays was an irredeemable pile of shite, don't you...?

Statement #2: You want to see more “experimental” horror movies after the success of movies like Skinamarink and The Outwaters in 2023. FACT - Although hopefully not "experimental" as a euphemism for "half-baked crap carried by its visual style", because I don't want another Cosmopolis and/or Crimes of the Future experience if I can potentially avoid it

Statement #3: Moving forward, the MCU needs to pivot away from the Kang character and the “multiverse” in general. FICTION - The MCU definitely needs to pivot, as 2023 was the year where people caught on to how it is the very definition of "content" in the reaction channel definition of the word, but what it needs to pivot towards is something that shakes the formula up. Oh who are we kidding, this is Disney we're talking about, so they'll just do an MCU/Star Wars crossover

Statement #4: The Last of Us was the best TV show of 2023. FICTION - It was good, in fact it was very good, but Inside No 9 takes the crown for me, because which other show can have people raging about an episode being bumped for a gameshow and then getting wrongfooted as the gameshow was the episode? And that's barely scratching the surface...

Statement #5: The only thing left worth watching on network TV is live sports. FICTION - Partly because Inside No 9 is on network TV in the UK, and partly because live sports is either the dregs that Sky or BT don't want such as darts, snooker, darts, crown green bowls and darts, Six Nations matches other than England home games (which are on Sky, along with the one song their supporters sing when England are at least 10 points up with five minutes to go...) and because the live football is almost inevitably Manchester United's match in every single round of the FA Cup until they're eliminated

Statement #6: The producers of the Scream franchise need to do whatever it takes to get Melissa Barrera and Jenna Ortega back. Barrera already met with Spyglass Media a week or two ago, and that meeting lasted all of 45 second between her walking in and walking out again. In other words, Spyglass need to accept that they fucked it and put the franchise on the backburner

Statement #7: You find it annoying that streaming TV series can have any random number of episodes per season and new seasons can sometimes take years to come out without any explanation. FICTION - In terms of streaming platforms, there are far more annoying things they can do with shows, such as cancel them after a season or two, or what Crunchyroll did a couple of years ago and put 95% of their shows behind a paywall with zero warning, while All4 found a new way to be annoying in 2023 by heavily advertising a couple of shows but neglecting to mention that they'd be leaving the platform within a month. So if anyone would like to let me borrow their Apple TV account so I can finish watching The Girl from Plainview...?

Statement #8: We won’t see any theatrical events in 2024 like we did in 2023 with Barbenheimer or the Taylor Swift concert film. FICTION - Guaranteed somebody will try to manufacture one like that at some point in 2024. Actually, scratch that, attempts at forcing another Barbenheimer have already happened as we saw desperate attempts to make Saw Patrol a thing with Paramount even tweeting about it, though we were robbed of ExorSwift when Universal lost their nerve. That being said, if a cinema did happen to show Oppenheimer and Godzilla Minus One at the same time, there is still time to make Godzenheimer a thing. Come on, people!!!

[thomcantsleep]

How To Start Writing - Exercises and Prompts to Massage Your Imagination

Some would say that it’s the hardest part of the whole affair. How to actually put pen to paper and begin somewhere - to take the first step in a long walk. It is difficult but it doesn’t have to be and something that I’ve learned from my time at university is that ultimately it’s up to you to put your foot on the accelerator.

What can prove useful is taking writing exercises just to get you started. Here are some of my favourites.

1. “I Remember...”

This is a timed one and I recommend giving yourself fifteen minutes but you can go as high as thirty if I you feel you need it. Essentially, you picture a place or a time in your personal life - it could be just a particular season or a year or even your whole childhood - and start every sentence with “I remember” just to see what comes to mind. What is important to remember is that a lot of writing is based on personal experience whether we like it or not and tackling your own upbringing artistically could bring the best out of you.

The important caveat about this writing exercise is to not stop if you can help it. Write on impulse. Whatever comes to mind about say, when you were fourteen years old, get it written down. You never know which direction you could end up going in. You may be telling yourself that your life isn’t that interesting but you’d be surprised what you can recall and the poetry that comes with it. Think about the senses, thoughts and feelings that would be going through your mind at the time.

This exercise is for testing your descriptive ability.

2. Photo/Music/Object Prompts.

Grant Wood - “American Gothic”

This one is pretty free-form. Look at any image - preferably a painting - of landscaped scenery or of abstract art and see what comes to mind. You may think it’s simple, too easy or even limiting but the point about utilizing visual prompts is that you can always fall back on them. The best ideas are always happened upon accidentally. You may find that your mind is exploring a facet of life previously uncharted in your brain.

My favourite kind of prompt - music - can be incredibly provocative. This is especially true if it’s a genre or category of music that you aren’t necessarily familiar with. Whatever your preferred way of streaming music is, look through genre mixes, radios or playlists of stuff that you’re maybe only vaguely familiar with and just let it play. Close your eyes. Picture the music. Picture the story it’s telling. Put yourself in a new world.

You could even take a physical object and study it for a while. Think of a story for it. It might be a weird esoteric knick-knack or a statue that your mother has hung on to for 45 years for no good reason. What do you feel when you look at it? What goes through your mind? Where could it come from? You could even go to a place near you and engage that same creative mindset.

The possibilities are literally endless.

3. One-Word Prompts.

Specifically, limit yourself and see what comes out. For example, you have to start a one-page short story that starts with the sentence “The trees were made of gold”. Have a couple of attempts and see what happens. There are websites, Twitter accounts and probably even Tumblrs that generate prompts and challenges.

You could decide to write a short story with a certain title like a single word. Base the entire story around that word. This, of course, all counts for poetry or even if you’re doing a diary or a journal entry. The primary function is to get your mind thinking unilaterally about writing and how you approach it. Make something out of what is supposedly nothing.

4. Short As Possible (The Shape of Stories by Kurt Vonnegut)

This is more of an editing exercise and a practice in story-structuring. Take a pre-existing story, either one you have written or one by someone else, and make it as short as possible. Cut it down to the absolute basics and by doing this, you excavate the bones. You know what is important and what isn’t. In a way, it’s like planning posthumously.

To help me explain this, I’m going to use a favourite of mine: Kurt Vonnegut’s The Shape of Stories

Image Courtesy of OpenCulture.com

Vonnegut uses a chart system to explain how certain stories are shaped based around the fortunes of the protagonist. Higher on the wavelength equals better fortunes and lower equals worse and he points out that contrary to the proverb, things often get better before they get worse. But other types of stories follow different patterns with different events marked on each peak and trough to underline the great shape that stories all take. When you understand this, you are able to know the important events, why they happen and when they happen.

The point of this is to get a handle on what direction you’re going in your story when you cut everything down to basics. When you know what events are the important ones and what they do for your story, it can do wonders for your long term ability to draft a story.

...If that makes sense.

5. Don’t Write If You Don’t Feel Like It

This one is going to blow your mind.

If you’re sitting there, staring bare-faced at the paper with nothing coming out, banging the keyboard with frustration, I’ll illuminate you. Just stop.

Get up and turn away from the keyboard. Close the lid or shut the notebook. Put your work away and go and do something else with your time. Distract yourself. Watch a new TV show or a film. Go out for a walk. Read a book. Do anything else because one thing that you aren’t going to do in those moments of fierce writer’s block is write. Allow yourself a break and put your mind at rest for a bit because when you come back, you’ll be more ready to tackle your work. It’s an exercise because it’s a psychological difficulty to give yourself a break if you’re a creative individual. Time always hangs heavy on your hands but only if you let it.

“There is no such thing as “Writer’s Block”, only impatience”

[pale-silver-comb]

So I know absolutely nothing about Leverage except what I've been seeing you post lately and I have to admit you're making it look tempting to watch! Can I ask what are some of your favorite things about the show/reasons you would suggest people watch it? And is there really a poly relationship that is canon?

Okay. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. I am going to do my best not to just “asdfghkjl” at you and answer coherently.

In a nutshell, Leverage is about 5 people. 4 are criminals (Parker, Hardison, Eliot and Sophie) with different and unique skill-sets and 1 is an ex-insurance investigator (Nate) who, at one point or another in his career, has tracked down (or at least attempted to) the other 4. The whole show is essentially: man reluctantly reforms 4 criminals to use their criminal powers for good and 4 criminals move into man’s life and stubbornly refuse to leave because, goddammit, now they have morals. 

I’ve got a lot of favourite things about the show but the main ones are as follows:

1. Found family. And I’m not talking about loners who come together to fight crime and happen to co-exist to the point where they realise they happen to have found themselves a family. I mean, Nate and Sophie are the Drunk Uncle and Wine Aunt who somehow become Mom and Dad to 3 beautiful criminal children. Mom and Dad love their criminal babies and the kids love them (as well as each other, but we’ll come to that in a moment). You get amazing family moments such as: Mom and Dad packing the kids lunch before sending them out to kick corporate greed’s ass; Mom and Dad giving the kids ridiculously expensive and personal Christmas presents causing their most Grumpy Kid to go very very quiet and soft as he runs off to gleefully play with his new murder toy; the kids interrupting Mom and Dad’s big Movie Style Kiss to ask if they can please keep their new underground layer and huffing and puffing when Dad tells them no.

2. Found family: the OT3 edition. To answer your question, the OT3 is indeed canon, confirmed by the creator. Now, usually, “confirmed by the creator” infuriates me because most of the time it’s a way for a creator to be seen as “progressive” without doing anything to actually be progressive. That isn’t the case here. The OT3 are built up carefully and while it is obvious the creators didn’t originally intend for all 3 of them to become a relationship in the romantic sense, by mid-season 5 we are given a very clear picture of where Parker, Hardison and Eliot are heading in their relationship. There aren’t any kisses at the end to signal this but there are solid marriage vows in not only one but two episodes. (And by marriage vows I mean literal equivalents of marriage vows: “for better or worse” and “’til death do us part”. I’m not even exaggerating). The OT3 also doesn’t need explicit romantic narratives to convey how much they love each other. Their love is laced through the whole show, from the way they teach each other things to the way they respond to each other and work as a unit. The way they fiercely protect and admire each other. Like someone once said, if you need characters to kiss or say I love you to let the audience know they love each other, you are writing them wrong. 

Aside from that, each of the parings in the OT3 are just. Gah. They are so well done, with friendship being the solid basis for them all. The creators never expect the audience to assume anything about them or fill in the gaps. They give us their relationships on screen and reference many things off-screen to show us how these relationships continue to build in between episodes.

Hardison and Parker are a canon couple and date in the show: it’s approached slowly and they are so goddamned sweet. They are basically every fluffy slow-burn trope with a healthy dash of mutual pining in the mix. They are basically that quote “love is patient, love is kind”. (I would like to add their romance never becomes the focus of the show or overrides the importance of any other relationship they have with the other characters, especially Eliot.)

Hardison and Eliot are the Old Married Couple and from day one are already bickering and looking at each other/making comments that are found in every UST fic ever (not to mention Hardison has a very good knack for making Eliot grin like a little kid, when usually he’s basically an Angry Little Chef Man). They argue, they play, and love each other plain as day. 

Parker and Eliot are more subtle but every bit as wonderful. They have an unspoken connection and understand each other on a level no-one else can. Parker and Eliot are not good with giving themselves over to affection for different reasons (and Hardison plays a central role in helping them realise it’s okay to want it and have it- that boy has endless patience) but there is something so beautiful in the way the two of them come together on their own and develop their own special bond that works for them. Parker and Eliot are that trope where the characters don’t need to speak to understand each other perfectly. They just do. Their love language is a lot of the time non-verbal but speaks volumes. (Parker also likes to annoy the hell out of Eliot and Eliot....just.....lets...her. Because he’s soft. The softest, grumpiest boy.) 

I could go into so much depth for each pairing and their dynamics as a 3 but that's for another post.

3. Subverting stereotypes. There is the occasional hiccup in the show regarding stereotypes but ultimately, Leverage gets an A+ when it comes to writing characters and making them 3 dimensional people who are not defined by certain characteristics or events. Nate could so easily fall into the White Man Pain trope where he uses the trauma of losing his kid as a reason as to why he is entitled to act like a dick. Nate is a dick but he doesn’t use his pain to excuse it and I appreciate that. Hardison is a black man who is soft and nurturing. Easily the most empathetic and patient of the group. He’s nerdy, an actual genius, and has the biggest heart of all the characters. Nate is maybe the glue but Hardison is definitely the heart. Media’s usual aggressive, amongst other, racist stereotypes can fuck right off. Parker is canonically autistic (I am sure this was confirmed by one of the creators) and she is not defined by it. It’s not written as some kind of singular personality trait. It’s part of what makes up Parker but it’s only one facet of who she is and not once is her actions, thoughts or feelings treated like a joke. Sometimes people don’t understand why she does and says the things she does but it’s met with patience and fondness over the course of the show. Equally, it’s not met with over-caution. Parker is just Parker. No-one tries to change her. The other nice thing is Hardison, who always makes sure Parker knows she’s amazing because of who she is and not in spite of it. Finally, Sophie is in her 40s. She’s not treated like she’s past her prime. Ever. She’s sexy, smart and never is she pitted against or compared to Parker (who is younger) for anything. Sophie is amazing and there’s never even a conversation of “I may be older but I am still *insert adjective typically associated with younger women here*”. Sophie is possibly the first female character I’ve ever seen who isn’t just unapologetic about her age but has never had to apologise for her age. It’s a non-issue and that’s that. The women on the show are written so well, right down to secondary characters and it’s beyond refreshing.  

4.) It’s just fun. The show has a “monster of the week” type format. Except instead of a ghoul or a ghost, the monster is some corrupt wealthy and powerful individual or organisation. The show draws on real-life individuals to do this and therefore closely parallels real-life people and events. It addresses important political, economical, social and environmental issues while at the same time remaining fun and light-hearted. The characters constantly get the chance to play dress up and by GOD do they have fun with it. You get to watch Eliot beat up bad guys in the most delightful of ways, usually after a witty non-sequitur and with a weapon you’d never think could be a weapon. The dialogue and back and forth between the characters is everything. And finally - my favourite thing- the team can never resist striking a dramatic pose after they’ve taken down the bad guy, making sure the bad guy sees them. I mean, they COULD just walk away, satisfied they’ve taken the person down, but nope. They gotta be dramatic bitches 24/7 and pose like they are models for every single month of this year’s Criminal Calendar.  

5.) Competence Porn. So. Much. Competence Porn.  

Honestly, I could list a thousand reasons for why Leverage is amazing but to list them would to be spoiling so many amazing moments you’d get to discover for the first time on your own if you do choose to watch it. It’s the kind of show you can watch with an eagle-eye and sink your teeth into. But it’s also the kind of show if, you would prefer, put on in the background for something entertaining while you do something else. Each episode is about the job at hand but it’s made up of so many moments between the characters that show how much the creators and writers care about them. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll do whatever it is you do when something Soft and Wonderful happens that makes your heart melt. I am so beyond grateful for Leverage. It’s everything I always wanted in a show. Nearly every show I’ve watched in the past 10 years has disappointed me in some way, usually either because the writers run out of steam or characters who I love are treated poorly or given some kind of unnecessary “shock value” arc. Leverage doesn’t do that. Leverage is what it says on the bottle. Fandom isn’t something I joined because I needed canon fix-its. Fandom only enhances and celebrates an already excellent canon. 

[creatingnikki]

What 2020 has taught me

1. Those things that seem like content for sci fi or pure fiction are actually things that can happen. To the entire world. Like a pandemic. And to you. Like a seizure.

2. Everyone is sad. Everyone is struggling. In different ways and in different measures. Makes no one special. But you still get to feel sad for yourself and be compassionate towards others. But it's also okay to draw boundaries because you're everyone too. Remember, not special? You're sad and trying to deal with it too.

3. Every job you have will not add value to your life. It will not teach you new things or give you people you'll want to stay in touch with. Sometimes some jobs will only be a season of your life. Even if the season lasts for over a year. It's okay.

4. You know how you thought picking a college and picking a major and picking your first job and picking a specific industry were all the career decisions you had to make? Yeah, no. It's never a one time thing. You could have a job as a marketing strategist for two years and then want nothing to do with it. And then you'll have to make another decision and work towards it. So I'd like to call it moves. It's like chess. You always have to make a move. And it always has to be strategic, yes. But the truth is in your 20s it probably won't. Even if you try. And as long as you're trying, you'll be fine.

5. You may have different sorts of friends like the one you only talk to about kdrama with or the one you met when you went book shopping alone and the friendship is all about books really. That's normal. But irrespective of why and how you became friends with them, if you consider them a friend then there has to be this basic sense of care, respect and empathy for each other. I don't care what people want to say. If you're faced with the worst trauma of your life, the least your friends can do is check up on you regularly. On text. And if they don't even do that then guess what? They aren't friends. They are acquaintances. Social media and quick promises make everyone seem like your friend. But they are not. They are just nice people who will be nice to you for specific periods and then wander away like you are a speck of dust floating in their journey.

6. You speak a lot and write and you express yourself and you’re emotionally mature but oh my god. You still hold in so much. You’ve known that at a subconscious level and over the last year people - experts - have told you that. You have also realized that you make your pain and sadness about pettier things because dealing with them, admitting about them, sharing that with your friends, is easier. You do that so that you don’t have to deal with the real stuff. Because it’s so damn painful. And you don’t know how to do it. Yet. Acknowledging is the first step anyway right? I know you’re confused about how exactly to let go of all this pain and sadness and feel lighter, and you know that talking to people really isn’t the solution, but I also know you’re smart enough to figure it out. 

7. Talking about being smart...you know you’re different than others. Better. Special. Smarter. None of these are the right words. And you never voiced this out until this year because you knew it would make you come across as narcissistic. Some would say it’s because you’re an INFJ. But my mother once said that this may be the first time we are consciously living life but our souls are old and so our instinct and the things we know but can’t explain are because this isn’t the first time for our souls. The connections we feel with certain people, the reason we are so different from our siblings who grew up in the exact same environment with the exact same opportunities, our sense of right and wrong...it’s all because our souls learn and grow with each time and that’s why we are who we are. I think that’s probably how I can explain what I have always felt. That I am living in a different universe than everybody but I have to pretend to be in this one and dumb my emotions and thoughts down. Maybe that’s because my soul has lived through thousands of years while most around me are living their 100th life. Or maybe I’m just narcissistic, who knows?

8. You shift between talking in first person and second person but that’s because that’s how you think in your head and talk to yourself and live your life. You ask yourself things and you accuse yourself of things and you apologize to yourself and you comfort yourself. I think that seeps into your writing and the changing of the voices. 

9. You always genuinely thought that you’d not be afraid of dying. And then what happened this October proved you shockingly wrong. I know it’s not so much being afraid of dying but the unbearable pain of knowing what that would mean to your family. So you have to be more prudent and less reckless with your life and the choices you make. 

10. Regret is not something that plagued you but this year the realisation and pain of giving away your favourite books from your own personal collection to people you care about as a show of affection and them turning out to be ass holes or losers has hit you so hard. So, yes. No more of that shit. I really fucking want my copy of The Perks Of Being A Wallflower back. UGH. With the childhood picture of me inside it! 

11. Sleeping at 5 am in the morning stops being fun or romanticised when you realise just how much harm it does to your body and mind. Literally every single disease and disorder can be traced back to a shitty fucking sleep schedule. It’s not just the hours you sleep but also the quality of sleep and the time you sleep at. So yes sleeping for 8 hours is healthy but not if that 8 hours is from 5 am to 12 pm. ‘Not a morning person’ is just another construct of capitalism and you don’t realise how many industries profit from having you believe that and staying up late or all night. Entertainment. Food. Alcohol. Pharma. Biologically and naturally you are a bloody morning person. And you don’t need 3 cups of coffee to begin your day or your phone notifications to get you to open your eyes and brain to wake up. 

12. Sometimes you really have to stop taking people so seriously. I know the idea of treating people as casual friends or entertainment makes you want to fight that concept but you know what? Some people like Pineapple are ever only going to be good for that. No matter how much they ‘grow and change’. So keep them in the background for whenever you want some entertainment or drama. But please don’t clear up your busy schedule to meet them or send them gifts on their birthday. 

13. If you don’t have the fruit juice or green juice within half an hour of making it then you are losing out on its most optimum health benefits. Or when you remove the white stringy stuff from oranges. That’s where all the actual nutrients are.

14. I am privileged and so are most of the people I interact with. The global pandemic has been hell for a lot of people around the world. Health wise. Financially. Losing people they care about. But I was blessed enough to be safe at home and have a job that I could smoothly do from home and not have a pay cut or 4-hour long Zoom meetings. So honestly when my friends tell me 2020 has been bad I have to stop and ask them why? Yes, the crippling uncertainty and anxiety is not something that can be undermined. But most people I know had very great positive life-changing milestones this year like moving away to another country for college or taking their first solo trip or getting married. So I have to ask them. Because I am not going to agree that everybody’s 2020 and pandemic narrative is the same. 

15. Money gets spent really quickly. When I left my job earlier this year because of personal issues, I thought I had enough savings to last me a year. Full disclosure - I mean to last my personal expenses because I live with my parents. But it didn’t even last me 3 months. And so to use money wisely and buy things that provide utility than instant gratification is something to follow. Also buying one pair of really expensive but quality shoes is better than buying 5 pairs of affordable but low quality shoes that will have a very short life and force you to buy more. I know that higher price doesn’t always mean better quality but sometimes it does. And as an adult now I want to do the whole quality > quantity thing even with things and not just people. 

16. Everyone in their 20s went through a crisis of what they should do with their lives and their careers and it’s not unique to the 21st century and the challenges of today. Whether it was Vincent Van Gogh in the 19th century or Sylvia Plath in the 20th, every single person, as brilliant as them went through the torture of making these decisions and living with their consequences. You may think I picked wrong examples for they both killed themselves but you know what? They were the people who really want to live more than anyone. They knew what life meant. And maybe if mental health help was more accessible back then their lives would be longer and more peaceful. 

17. Telling people everything is overrated. You don’t have to talk about every single thing that’s on your mind or that’s going on in your life. The good and the bad and the mediocre. You have to be mindful about how much of yourself you’re giving away. 

18. Re-watch Suits when people at work feel intimidating because the confidence + negotiation tactics that they show can actually work irl cos at the end of the day no matter in what position you’re dealing with people who have emotions and fears and insecurities and desires. You understand how to leverage that nobody can get the better of you. 

19. You belong to yourself. No matter how much you love someone or how much they have done for you or how much you owe them - you belong to yourself. You can’t live your life for someone else. Everyone belongs to themselves first. No relationship, no promise, no circumstance should make you feel like you have to give up your life and make it all about them. If and when the time comes to die for them, go ahead. Take a bullet. Donate that kidney. Write them in your will. But live your life for yourself. And let them live theirs. 

20. Twenty three was a challenging year. When it started you claimed the age 23 sounds boring and insignificant. Guess it proved you wrong. It hurt so much now. But that only means you’ll look back on it later and see how it added so much wisdom and resilience to your being. It doesn’t mean that it makes all the bad things that happened to you okay. Or that you should be grateful to them. Fuck no. It means that you should be kinder to yourself because at the end of the day, your mind and body find it in themselves to deal with whatever is thrown their way. They have your back. It’s time you learn to sit straight. 

[shatteredatthealtarofwinchester]

Umm, wait. It's more a 15x20 rant than an analysis. I'll call it... a ranalysis. 😏

I just saw J*reds last online panel again, where he called the finale "magical full circle storytelling". 15x20 is his "favourite episode ever" because he "is a fan of good storytelling". Uh-huh... Okay. So the following just was built on pure rage. This makes it more of a rant than an analysis. As usual. You guys know me.

Well. There are various possibilities here, Jared. Possibility A is, you are lying, what I do not believe. To lie that obvious you have to be a talented actor, which you are not. Possibility B is, you really think that way. You believe, the finale was "magical full circle storytelling" and you actually loved it, it was indeed your favourite episode. This again brings me to the only conclusion: You have no fucking idea about good storytelling, not even decent storytelling.

Lets look at every single ending, shall we?

Dean. We all know you think Deans death was a "success story." You think that Dean "ultimately gave his life for his number one on planet." I am sitting here, laughing in pain. First of all, let me say that Dean didn't died for Sam, Jared. He didn't took a bullet for Sam or sacrificed himself or whatsoever. He died in the most ridiculous accident I've ever seen. But lets go back to the very start.

Dean’s childhood was highly abusive. Dean was 4 years old when he saw his mother burning alive and learned that monsters are real. In that age he developed PTSD and stopped talking. Dean had a childhood with a father that was an alcoholic and physically and mentally abusive, who had believed that Dean had a “killer instinct". When Dean was about 6 years old, John forced him into a nurturing role for Sam. In the same age Dean was forced into the soldiers role as well when John taught him how to shoot and hunt. Dean had to obey orders without questioning. If he acted “out of line,” (aka something John didn’t like) John chewed him out or left them alone. Dean was trained to be Daddy’s blunt instrument. Dean gave up his own life to keep Sam safe, because he had no other choice. More than a brother Dean had to be a father and a mother to Sam. He suppressed everything, every psychological pain, every emotion, he just lived to protect Sam and to obey as Johns blunt soldier. Short: Dean gave up HIMSELF for Sam and John. Not because Dean wanted to, because he was forced into it! Dean hated himself, he was suicidal. He was convinced he isn’t worthy of anything, especially not being loved. Dean never had a life for his own, never had a choice, never had a chance, never had own original thoughts, never felt safe or loved. He was used to being left. He felt like he was nothing. Worthless. He was dead inside. Broken. You get what I mean, Jared? Since you own a mental health campaign, you should. And guess what Dean did? He kept fighting. Despite everything, he kept fighting. And his mindset slowly changed. He understood that his father was an abusive bastard, he unterstood that he was forced into a life he never wanted. He understood that he is more than that, that he is not like John. He changed. He opened up. He even wanted to retire. And now it gets interesting, because something happened that REALLY is the start of magical full circle storytelling. Something in Deans mind clicked while Cas' confession. His confession was fundamental to Dean to finally accept his own goodness and the value of his life and love, of his identity. It was the moment of breaking free of the structure that had controlled and corrupted him his entire life. It was the only way out of his abusive and traumatizing cage to experience something for his own the very first time. For the first time in his life he had a chance. A choice. The start of his very own life. Free will, baby! Well, no. Because exactly in that moment he stumbled into a nail and died. Do you even realize how dumb this is? Do you even realize what you did? Wait, it gets worse. Yeah, that's possible, even if you dont believe it. In heaven he goes right back to the life he has spent his whole journey learning to free himself from: Left only with the persons he had been forced, time and time again, to sacrifice his identity, goals, and soul for. None of the family, support, or love, nothing he has built or chosen for himself remains. This is not magical full circle storytelling, Jared. This is abysmal pointless butchering. This has NOTHING, not a single percent of magical or good storytelling! YOU call that magical? YOU call that a success? Seriously, what shit are you on? If it would've been full circle storytelling, there is not one single fucking possibility that Dean would've died in the end. I don't know whats going on in your twisted brain, but Deans death never was and never will be a success. To make it magical full circle storytelling, he MUST have been the one who survives and overcomes his trauma (and raise a certain someone from perdition.)

Sam. He's actually the one who kinda got the best ending, huh? I mean, it was fucking horrific, but it was the best if you compare it to the others. When Sam was young, he wanted a normal life far away from hunting, while the truth is, Sam always was more like John than Dean ever will be. Over time his mindset clearly changed. He even said: "When Dean came to get me at school, I told myself, one last job, you know, (...) it was always one more job and then I was gonna go back to law and to my life. I guess, I really understand now that THIS is my life. And I love it." Sam couldn't imagine a normal life anymore. He had the chances for that and he declined. He loved hunting. He loved working and making progress with the BMOL, he very much enjoyed being a MOL and even took the lead often. I can clearly picture Sam as the lead of a rebuilt version of the MOL, that would've made sense. What did Sam get? Right, the ending he didn't wanted anymore, but since we yeet every single development of every single character out of the window, Sam has to be Season 1 Sam again, BUT with a fancy party wig! And there he is! And what a happy life he lives, exactly what he wanted, woohoo! So much joy, so much fun! Oh look, there is BlurryWife™, who Jared made sure is not Eileen, because “Dean wouldn’t want Sam to be with Eileen”. But wait, didn't Dean wanted Sam to be with Eileen? Didn't Dean literally said: "If it was to work, Eileen, you know... She gets it, she gets us, she gets the life. You could do worse. And she could certainly do better, like SO much better. I'm happy for you, Sammy." Yeah, NO. This was just a writing AND acting AND producing mistake and had no matter at all. *cough* So... As you can see, magical storytelling strikes again. I can feel the magic, I can feel the full circle, it's... Amazing...

Castiel. Castiels story was magical, it was mindblowing. I've never in my entire life seen such a meaningful and deep storyline and I mean this. It's fucking massive. There is this blunt angel soldier, one of the post powerful forces, who was built to blindly obey, who lived for aeons of years, who wasn't supposed to feel anything, but he fell for a broken, suicidal, abused human who never felt loved or worthy the very moment he touched him. He fell so hard he rebelled against his own race, against his own family, against everything he had without any safety. He was the ONLY one in Chuck-knows-how-many universes who GREW outside of Chucks CONTROL! His love was so fucking massive, it couldn't be controlled by the God who built every-fucking-thing. Chuck built millions(?) of parallel universes, heaven, hell, life, death, purgatory, the empty, he created every single being, the light, darkness, every single angel, demon, leviathan, monster, animal, plant, sea, blade of grass, every centimeter of mountains, the four seasons, emotions, what the fuck ever. Everything you can ever think of, Chuck created it. And he controlled it. In every single one of his fucking millions of universes. But not Castiel.This is actually not possible. You can't outrun god. You can't outrun the one who creates, writes and controlles everything. But Cas did. Out of love. And not only that, you also imply that what happened between Dean and Cas was the only thing  that was real. Everything else was corrupted, controlled, manipulated, written by Chuck. But what happened between Dean and Cas, he couldn't affect.

Seeing Cas standing there, crying, confessing his love to Dean actually even makes me think that Dean made Cas human. Dean completed Cas. Cas didn't simply said "I love you", he actually said "In all existing universes, in all millions, all aeons of years, you are my only happiness." And Cas completed Dean. He freed Dean. While Dean was used to being left, was used to feeling worthless and unlovable, Cas saw Dean exactly the way he is and chose to stay. With every obstacle, every difficulty he loved him even more and yes, freed him from the abusive structure that had controlled and corrupted him his entire life. Something that no one else could, not his parents, not Amara, not God, not even Sam. Beautiful, isn't it? Unique. Mindblowing. Pure. You enjoyed it? Let's fuck this up in 3...2...1...

Castiels story ended exactly the same way it started. A blunt angel who doesn't care about people and feelings, blindly carrying out instructions from a new God, obeying heaven. No progress. They threw away 12 years of character development and managed to give him the same stupid and senseless ending like they did with Dean. Dean died and Cas... Wasn't there?! WHAT!? There is no single fucking way Cas wouldn't save Dean or wouldn't be there when Dean enters heaven! There. Is. No. Fucking. Way! The way they represented Cas in the end doesn't only imply that Dean isn't important to Cas anymore, he even ended up exactly the same way as if Season 4-15 wouldn't have happened. The ending is exactly the same! He's with God in heaven, supporting him with instructions, not caring about anything else.

Okay, I got it. Summarizing you can say: Jareds "magical full circle storytelling" is to yeet 95% of the past 15 years. No other characters matter, the story itself doesn't matter, every single characters development doesn't matter, it even doesn't matter what the brothers really want, they don't get it anyway.

Okay. But that's not all. As if this wasn't bad enough, they didn't just butchered ... EVERYTHING, they also salted and burnt every single Mantra they ever stood for. I'll make these short, I promise!

Team Free Will. *snort* Dean couldn't escape his fate, he always believed he'll die on a hunt as Daddys blunt instrument and he did. He kept fighting to die exactly the way he felt he was "supposed to". Message? No matter how hard you keep fighting, no matter how long you'll keep it up, you can't escape your fate. Sam couldn't change his fate, he ended how he started. Cas couldn't change his fate, he ended how he started, same for Jack, he ended how he was supposed to. YEET THE FREE WILL, NONE OF THEM CAN CHANGE ANYTHING!

Family don't end with  blood. The biggest lie that has ever been told. Do I even have to explain that? No need, right? Don't make me wanna throw up again, please. We all know that 15x20 blasted "Family don't end with blood" in millions of pieces.

Always keep fighting. THE AUDACITY to praise that while Dean is dying! After everything Dean has dealt with, It makes me wanna scream. Dean kept fighting, he always kept fighting, no matter how hard it was, no matter what forced him to his knees, he stood up again, and if he wasn't able to stand up, he crawled. He kept fighting no matter what, despite everything. His mindset changed. He wanted to live, he wanted to experience things, feelings and people differently or even for the first time. He changed. He wanted to retire, toes in the sand. He knew he earned it. Thats why he kept fighting. For what? To die the very first moment he had a free will. To die the very first moment he had a choice, had a life to build for himself. Always keep fighting, but the moment you come close to what you want, what you fought for, you die. It's been more than 3 months and I am having tears in my eyes while typing this. As for Dean, no matter how hard you fight, no matter how long you fight, you don't reach what you deserve anyway. Give up. As for Sam, AKF leeds to Emptiness. Grief. Psychological Trauma. Mental illness. Absolutely nothing worth fighting for.

I wanna go cry now, bye.

[ratingtheframe]

10 Films to watch this Valentine’s Day if you’re single as hell.

If anyone or anything is making you feel worthless on the Capitalist Holiday that is Valentine’s Day because you’re single AF, then don’t fret because it means one of two things;

You’re happy enough with yourself to not need anyone else.

You’re allergic to people.

Though mine is both the former and the latter, I can still get down to a good romance movie now and again. Now I’m not talking about those horrendous rom coms that Netflix seems to be churning out every damn minute, but those emotionally invested, earthy and well written dramas that has you ugly crying into your bathrobe for 17 minutes straight (me at the end of Her.). Here is a compiled list of some of the best romance films I’ve seen over the years and how each one doesn’t showcase an abundance of clichés and brands them as “acts of love”.

A Star is Born (2018 or 1953, take your pick)

I’ve found that both the 1953 version of A Star is Born with Judy Garland and the 2018 newer version to be a perfect and well rounded love story. What makes this love story so fierce is the vulnerabilities and downfall of its characters, which even though there are many sad moments, it perpetuates and strengthens the acts of love shown in the film. Both versions are similar in that they follow a woman who’s rise to fame as a performer becomes overshadowed by her jealous partner, who is also a notable celebrity. In the 2018 version starring Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper, Gaga’s character Ally is helped by a country singer, Jackson Maine to become a successful singer and icon amongst the music industry. As she rises, Jackson falls and the character dynamics and intensity between them is a fitting love story. I was thoroughly bawling at the end and I guarantee you will too as Lady Gaga’s rendition of Love Again was the true scene stealer of the film. 

Call me by your name (2017)

I have an incredible bias towards this film and it has nothing to do with the film’s context or characters or even Timothée Chalamet The reason why I feel so connected to this film and proclaim it as my favourite film of all time is because of when I watched the film. It’s almost like seeing a film about a political event right after it's happened; you have this rush and connection towards something that’s actually affected you in the real world. I had the same feeling with Call me by your name after going through a rough and confusing patch whilst trying to get over someone I thought I truly loved. Turns out I didn’t (thank god) and yet Call me your name was almost like a shoulder to cry on. It’s a film that’s taught me to love and love hard but most importantly, not beat yourself up or try to distinguish the pain felt by true love. If you haven’t been fortunate to catch this beauty of a film, it follows two men, Elio (Timothée Chalamet) and Oliver (Armie Hammer) and their brief relationship in the summer of 1983 in Northern Italy. 17 year old Elio lives with his parents and his father (Michael Stuhlbarg) is a scholar who invites students from outside the country for the summer in hope of passing on his wisdom to them. This is when Oliver arrives, a handsome twenty something American who becomes the infatuation of Elio. 

I’ll never forget the first time I heard the monologue that Elio’s father gave his son at the end, explaining to Elio why he shouldn’t feel embarrassed by the pain he felt after loving Oliver:

“We rip out so much of ourselves to be cured of things faster, that we go bankrupt by the age of thirty and have less to offer each time we start with someone new. But to make yourself feel nothing so as not to feel anything - what a waste”

That, ladies and gentlemen and all in between, is what love is.

Her. (2013)

Once again, another film about love that had a profound effect on me because of when I watched it. Her. follows the story of Theodore (Joaquin Phoenix) and his search for a story using an A.I to help him write. However, after getting to know this A.I named Samantha (Scarlett Johansson) and hearing the way she adapts and shows emotions, he soon falls in love with it. Some may deem this as rather sad (which it is) but I think it speaks to bigger constructs like internet dating and letting go of people you loved thus diminishing the fantasy and world you created for the two of you. This part of the film got to me a stark way as I felt the pain of letting go of not only a person, but a fantasy, just like Theodore had to do in letting his past partners go. Her. is truly beautiful, with some great production design, cinematography and acting.

Portrait of a Lady on Fire (2019)

The absolute queen of love stories would be Céline Sciamma’s Portrait of a Lady on Fire, a film about the romance between two women in the late 18th Century. Definitely not a narrative you see every day or one that’s been painted in such a way (pun intended). Marianne (Noémie Merlant) is commissioned to paint the beautiful and stubborn Héloïse (Adèle Haenel) and the portrait is to be gifted to a suitor of Héloïse’s from Milan. But instead of getting the painting done and sending it off, Marianne and Héloïse unexpectedly fall for one another at a subtle and well timed pace that had me gawping at the screen the entire way through. Slow, sensual and moving is Portrait of a Lady on Fire and I would definitely say is one of the best LGBTQ plus films ever made to date.

Broke Back Mountain (2005)

Ang Lee scooped up a BAFTA, Golden Globe and Oscar for his direction on his adapted screenplay of Brokeback Mountain. Ennis Del Mar (Heath Ledger) and Jack Twist (Jake Gyllenhaal) form a romantic bond after shepherding alone together on the side of a mountain. Once their time herding sheep comes to a close and they return back to their respective lives, it's clear that their bond is stronger than they had anticipated. They live in constant fear of their relationship becoming apparent to those around them, which leaves one of them taking matters into their own hands. A controversial yet extremely successful film of its time, Brokeback Mountain does a fabulous job of showcasing the consequences and despair of love using two of Hollywood’s finest actors.

Carol (2013)

It’s difficult to fully appreciate LGBTQ plus films set in the past as they mostly focus on the persecution of homosexuals as opposed to the love they wish to express. However, this was pretty accurate of the time and it's only very recently that we have begun to accept one another’s sexualities and genders fully so much that we play these stories out on screen without the persecution part. Carol is a film directed by Todd Haynes and stars Rooney Mara and Cate Blanchett. I found them to be an extremely intense pairing whilst they unravelled as their characters on screen. Therese (Rooney Mara) works in the toy department of a department store when one day she lays eyes upon Carol Aird, a beautiful and elegant married woman who becomes the infatuation of Therese. Therese throws all caution to the wind in order to be closer to Carol and because of this and the 1950s society they live in, their relationship is doomed from the beginning. I was in complete awe of the way Carol had been shot and created into this sensual and rich drama set in the 1950s. From the costumes, to the lighting to the acting, everything about Carol held weight to it showcasing the devotion of a truly talented director.

Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind (2004)

Usually I’d pass on a Charlie Kaufman film, seeing as they make no sense, however I felt that it was time I delved into this cult classic starring Kate Winslet, Jim Carrey, Kirsten Dunst, Mark Ruffalo and Elijah Wood. It’s a really well made film with a clear and distinct message to it that’s represented in some phenomenal filmmaking techniques. The plot line of this film follows a man trying to erase a past lover and his memories of her get wiped away physically before your eyes on screen. It made me wish that I could do the same with people I’ve liked in the past, but the contradictory of this would be the trauma of eventually ending up with someone you had already met in another life. I haven’t experienced a break up nor felt the pain of one, though I could judge that this film tells that experience really well.

Moonlight (2016)

Moonlight is one of few films that I would genuinely worship if it were a religion. It's also one of the films that I outwardly shame people for not having seen, as it is truly a masterpiece and film lover’s film. Deep, emotionally connected, colourful, harsh, moving and eye opening, this film takes you on an emotional rollercoaster through the eyes of Chiron and the three stages of his life that have carved out his essence as a human being. Not only that, but he falls in love with another boy at his school, and when he does, he’s hurt rather badly. Literally. Moonlight is the definition of profundity and was awarded the top prize of Best Picture at the 2017 Academy Awards. 

Loving (2016)

When I think of a truthful and honest testament of love, the film Loving comes to mind which is a fitting title for such a delicate yet strong story. The film is based on a true story of an interracial couple, Richard and Mildred (Joel Edgerton and Ruth Negga) being banned from Virginia in the 1950s for choosing to be together. If that ain’t a true sacrifice of love, then I don’t know what is. Choosing someone you love over your own home is an unfathomable thing and certainly shows the strength that this couple had in facing the judgements of others whilst remaining emotionally truthful to themselves. 

The Shape of Water (2017)

The Shape of Water is a strange yet enlightening love story between Eliza, a deaf woman (Sally Hawkins) and a creature being tested on in a laboratory. Awards season went mental for this back in 2018, winning four of the THIRTEEN Oscars it was nominated for. I would categorize it as quite the niche film and wouldn’t usually think that such a film could be garnered with Oscar success. However everyone who worked on this film really pulled out the stops in creating an entire new world and perspective that has many layers to it, as well as an abundance of conflict and dynamics for audiences to lull over. The relationship between Eliza and the feared swamp monster that’s being cruelly tested in the laboratories where she works, is heartfelt and honest, which is strange seeing as Eliza’s virtually in love with a monster. The casting in this was outlandish yet it really worked as all actors in this melded well into the story as their prospective characters. It also has one of the most touching endings to a film I’ve ever seen.

And there you have it, ten Romance films for you to enjoy this Valentine’s Day. Watch them all at once, or maybe just watch one. Whether you watch it alone or with someone, it doesn’t really matter!

Lots of love

Ang x

[longtimewish]

Alas, I've finished my rewatch of the second season of The Great. I think it's funny how so many shows infamously have put out seasons with a very low quality this past year and blamed it on the covid restrictions, meanwhile this unhinged show who also filmed under these restrictions released a season that surpassed its predecessor in every single way. So without any further delay, here are my thoughts of the last three episodes:

- That one scene (you know which one) kinda made me forget most of what happened on ep 8, but this episode actually has a lot of highlights

- One of them being Arkady 100% ready to shoot Peter if he even dared to hit his son, my favourite underrated moment of the season tbh

- I literally yelled "PERFECT CASTING" at my screen the first time I saw that Jason Isaacs was playing Peter the Great

- Peter fucked up really bad but all I could think of it's how this was also literally a plotline from Reign. That show really paved the way for a whole new generation of period dramas and it's time that we admit it

- EPISODE 9 MY BELOVED. Upon rewatch I decided that this is my favourite episode of the season and maybe even of the entire show. And yes it is entirely for shipping reasons

- But before going agsshsgl about the best enemies to lovers to have ever been written let's talk about the other highlight of the episode: Aunt Elizabeth. I haven't talk about her so far in my comments, but honestly out of all the supporting characters she is the one that shined the most. In season one I didn't cared that much for her, she was funny but I also felt that her character was mostly there just to be "quirky" and make sex jokes. In this season however she was one of the most fleshed out and complex characters of the cast, and Belinda Bromilow was amazing in this episode, the way she portrayed Elizabeth's grief over her son actually made me cry

- Marial looking for a husband was hilarious, but also it is in this episode when I realized that I legit liked her together with Grigor. I was sad when George came back and he couldn't marry her, and even sadder when she ended thing with him. After a whole season of Grigor suffering because his wife doesn't care that she sleeping with his best friend deeply hurt him I was so glad that he was in a happy relationship with his teen crush that when he decides to remain with Marial anyway I was like you go boy!!!

- Also fun fact: the Russian Orthodox Church actually forbids marriage between first cousins, so here is yet another thing that works different in The Great's AU

- Ok now LET'S TALK ABOUT THE BEST ENEMIES TO LOVERS TO HAVE EVER BEEN WRITTEN

- EVERYTHING about Peter and Catherine during this episode makes me go feral, EVERYTHING. Not just THAT scene but all of their moments together. Them holding Paul?? Their talk in the carriage, Peter making Catherine smile?? When he said that them being together was impossible and Catherine looked so sad??? How they hugged once they realised that Paul was safe??? They were SO IN LOVE during this episode

- AND STILL the confession had me shaking and screaming at my pillow at four AM. At that point it's obvious for us that Catherine does love Peter AND STILL when she says it I couldn't believe it. "First... Try and start breathing again" me too Peter, me too

- Also I must confess that I've already watched that scene so many times that I know the dialogues by heart (not that they talk too much, je)

- The first ten minutes of the last episode are wonderful and then everything is pain and suffering for fifty minutes straight

- The writing of this episode it's SUPERB. Even though my fav ep is the 9, THIS is the best episode of the entire show

- This episode it's just so raw, it's really all about Catherine and Peter's messed up relationship, about their love and hate and need for each other while all the other characters try to push the situation in their favour (or to scape the impending disaster). They don't want to hurt each other but they feel that have to and the question that is always asked is why? Why do they have to hurt each other? Why they can't hurt each other? Why do they love each other? Why do they have to kill each other? Why do they have to die for each other? And all of this is so well written and executed that it made the experience of watching the whole thing unfold both a torture and a delight

- That Marial was absolutely fine with covering up Johanna's death and lying to Catherine when she thought Elizabeth had killed her, but the second she hears it was actually Peter suddenly she feels that she has the moral obligation to tell the truth annoys me SO MUCH. Not because I think Catherine should've never know, she def had to find out the truth and the sooner the better, but because Marial acted throughout the entire episode as if she was in a sort of superior moral ground to everyone else. MARIAL YOU GLADLY COVERED UP THE MURDER OF YOUR BEST FRIEND'S MOM. YOU LIED TO HER FOR LITERAL MONTHS WITHOUT ANY REMORSE. She didn't told her the truth because it was the right thing to do and Catherine had to know, she did it because she doesn't like Peter. Which is a valid reason, but the lack of mea culpa from Marial really bothered

- The fact that Peter's first reaction to finding out that Catherine knows the truth was crying, not for himself but for the pain he caused her... Feeling Very Unwell

- Catherine going through a full mental breakdown about how she loves Peter and can't kill him also makes me feel SO Unwell but also I think it's really funny that throughout the entire scene Orlo is just staring in confusion being all "wait what the fuck are you talking about"

- That scene also sums up my problem with Orlo's arc this season: how disconnected it is from literally every single other plot from the show. That was probably the point, to show how Catherine kept sidelining the only people that's supporting her, but Orlo's plot just felt random to me, and he was out of the loop in a way in which non of the other characters were. Take the whole Catherine x Peter thing, EVERYONE but Orlo was aware that something was going on between the two of them during this season (even Velementov!). Orlo just popped up during the meetings, said something that was ignored by Catherine and then disappeared from the main story. I can't remember any significant scene that he had with a character that wasn't Katya or his uncle. I liked to see how his character changed and Sacha Dhawan is a fantastic actor, but I wished that he had more relevance in the main plot.

- Archie's plotline this season was... interesting, but I loved how he actually grew to admire and respect Catherine and chose to stand by her side. Alucinating about God after eating mushrooms together really brings people close

- It's been over a month and the final scene still haunts me. Elle Fanning's acting was INSANE, her pure rage?? Her SCREAM when she realized what she did, her sobs??? The expression of pure relief when she saw that Peter was fine??? And Nicholas Hoult also completely nailed the scene, HIS FACE when he sees Catherine??? When he hugs her??? HE KNOWS what she tried to do and yet his first reaction is to console HER. And then when they both stare at each other and the realization that they will never be able to kill each other because they love each other too much but after what happened they can't go back to the way things were before sinks and their faces are just so!!! This scene has literally just one line, "Pugachev", and yet it conveyed all of this entirely through the characters expressions. It's brilliant. It also broke my heart

- Overall, I think this season was, pun intended, great. A month ago I just liked this show but I didn't thought much about it, now I'm obsessed with it and this season it's my favourite thing I watched this year. It also cemented what I thought after watching the first season: Catherine and Peter's relationship it's the true heart of this series. Whether as enemies or lovers or both at the same time, it's their actions towards each other what moves the story forward, and that story simply wouldn't work without one of them. This show it's about them, about their hatred and their love for each other. Whether this love will end them, as Grigor feared, or begin them, as Peter hoped, remains to be seen.

[shadowed-dancer]

Thoughts on Episode 114 (S6 E1)

Badass bunny, best bros, and a season starting. Let’s talk about it

I may try and do these little thought summaries every Saturday, mostly so I can remember and look back later. I’ll try to do it earlier next time so my first impressions are still fresh

Spoiler free because I don’t mention specific moments or future events but like… if you know the manga you’ll know exactly what I’m talking about

The op and ed are so cool. I was honestly a little nervous with the op at first (when it just showed the title I was like “umm what is this?”) but as soon as I saw Deku and understood what was happening I was so hyped. The whole comic style was so cool, and there’s something very fun and meta about this being the arc manga (comic) readers were most excited for, and then showing some key moments like a comic book

I do feel the song is a little too… happy for what’s coming up, and part of me feels a sense of tonal dissonance hearing this upbeat song with footage of… a certain character on the attack. Like… that’s not a badass moment of “look how cool this guy is,” it’s a serious scene. It’s not a big deal, like I said, it just feels weird seeing that with this music. But it’s a great op overall and I love it so much

The ed actually made me misty eyed. Something about that shot of Tomura with the billowing cape is so calming. Big flashbacks to Sesshomaru in that one ed, big nostalgia hit

Also the shot of young Deku and Tenko… bro I feel so vindicated for Season 5

Also the Toga and Twice shot… and Uraraka turning around… and the UA teachers… and Dabi… and the SONG ITSELF… yeah you get it, the whole ed was amazing. I think it’s officially my favourite

As for the episode itself, I’m honestly impressed how well paced it was. 3 chapters AND some added filler? And yet nothing (that I could remember) was cut? Between this and the op and ed it makes me wonder what the hell was happening with Season 5

Hawks and Twice are getting along so well! Wow! Such friends. Much brotherhood

They added a little frame of Dabi sitting in a chair. If you know you know

Wash got 4 whole frames. I was legitimately so excited. I was expecting only 2 so when I saw those other ones I had the biggest smile on my face

Everyone was animated so nicely

This is so random, but I love that scene with the Todoroki siblings. In the manga that scene is a single panel of Fuyumi coming home and Natsuo greeting her (with no dialogue), which is fine in of itself but later in the arc we see Fuyumi and Natsuo at school. It’s a minor detail that most readers probably wouldn’t notice, but that fact that someone decided to fix this and have them head out for their day means someone in the writing room was actually paying attention to the small details, and that gives me a lot of hope going forward

That being said…

They added some dialogue like “team Endeavor will do this while team Edgeshot will do that” and while I like the explanation, I wish they’d included the fact that there are also attacks happening at bases all over the country, not just these two locations. Like they could have mentioned that these are the most important zones, but they didn’t mention the others at all. It makes the scale of this operation seem so much smaller than it is, and I’m nervous anime-onlies will think it’s literally just these two

The lighting in the doctor’s lab is so pretty. I can’t wait for next episode because I want to see a whole fight scene with that purple glow

I haven’t seen anyone mention it yet so I will. I think the new commercial break screens are cool as hell and I can’t wait to see different characters get them each week. I know a whole bunch of characters got art during the build up to this season, so let’s see it put to use!

Rip Johnny. Forever in our hearts, you will be missed

Overall? Despite a few minor nitpicks I thought this was a great episode. It was a wonderful way to start such a highly anticipated arc, and I’m so excited to see the rest of this season play out

[wishful-soda]

OMG Before I start talking I just wanna say that I haven't disappeared I actually did leave comments about last chapter idk what happend to that but whatever hahahah moving on also this has spoilers sooo 😗

THIS IS MY FAVOURITE CHAPTER. FAVOURITE. And this is coming from a person that is very indecisive. Holy shit.. THANK YOU FOR GIVING US THIS BEAUTIFUL STORY. The emotions that I've felt during this chapter.. I LITERALLY CRIED.. This is SO SO perfectly written. They really evolved from the beginning. And I'm not talking just about the statement friends. I'm talking about them ACTUALLY talking.

“Will you tell me about them? Your parents?” - I ALMOST FUCKING CRIED 🥺🥺🥺

The way she didn't even hesitate to tell him her story. That's growth. We would never see her do this few chapters ago. But now it just shows how much charecter development she had. She actually wanted to tell him about it. The way she couldn't said what she wanted and Daniel took her on his lap 🥰🥰🥰 that movement was so cute, hugging her and giving her the courage to continue.. It was on of the moments were my insides were melting.

Daniels little speech how he's so proud of her 🥺🥺🥺 im bawling my eyes at this point

THIGH RIDING 🥵🥵🥵 YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW LONG I WAS WAITING FOR THIS. HOLY SHIT IT WAS 100× BETTER THAN I EVER IMAGINED. WELL DONE

"that he’s noticed you for much longer than just these past few months, longer than just this season" this what I was saying for a while now. This man knows a lot more about her than she thinks. I'm so glad that we are finally at that point where he can confirm it, say it, give her a compliment and and not act all stupid, not say it as I joke. Actually mean it, every single word.

“You’ve got me right in the palm of your hand and you don’t even know it…”  ohhhhh he's soooooooo closeeee. Almost c'mon Daniel figured it out!!! You can do it!!!

So she rememebered saying to Max 'i think im falling in love with him' and she was waiting to feel panicky and horror because Max MIGHT POTENTIALLY know about them but she didnt felt panicky because she just kinda admitted that she is falling IN LOVE with HIM. Okay missy I see you.

I FUCKING KNEW IT!!! I FUCKING KNEW IT. I KNEW THAT DANIEL DOESNT HAVE TO DO ANYTHING WITH THAT ARTICLE. I've said this for last chaper and I'll say it again. I feel like Daniel wanted always to be her friend but then she was the one who started hating him and he was like better something then nothing so that's why he's been hating her. I feel like he doesn't really have any big reasons like she does. He was like if hating her, making fun of her, teasing her, making her life miserable means that I can be close to her then I'll take it. Better that than nothing. I feel this is exactly what happened.

“We did. Mutual hatred.” she just confirmed that they don't hate each other anymore. I don't think she even realized that 🤭 yes they said that they are friends but they never said that they dont hate each other anymore..

HOW COULD YOU END THE CHAPTER IN THAT I LITERALLY SCREAMED AND ITS 3AM I NEED TO KNOW.. I NEED NEXT CHAPTER ASAP... I SO DESPERATELY NEED TO KNOW WHY SHE SAID THAT (althought i might have hunch 😏)

Like I said this was SO PERFECT.. Loss of words honestly.. Also just wanted to say that I LOVED Max pov. That's something I didnt know I need it. i can't wait to reread it tomorrow and to come back if I noticed something new hahahaha. Thank you thank you thank you. I actually didn't expected this chapter to be published now and after the day we all had (looking at those mf from that team 😡) it was perfection. Hope you enjoyed my rant 😐🙃 lysm ❤❤❤❤

- introverted little bitch

Hi my dearest!!

I love hearing that it's your favorite chapter because it was one of my favorites to write!! I'm also so like...glad...that you cried? That sounds incredibly mean, but I don't mean it like that I promise!! I'm just so like...happy that my writing could invoke emotion like that? Y'know? I hope that makes sense and doesn't make me sound like a total bitch 😅

You're absolutely right, there's no way that she would have told him a few chapters ago. She would have been like 'fuck you gtfo' and resorted to being mean. I was a little worried that it was TOO cheesy and TOO soft and TOO over the top...? Maybe? I'm still worried I overdid it tbh.

I really loved writing his little speech about being proud of her, like honestly it felt genuine Daniel to me. I imagined how I'd feel being told similar things by Daniel and it made me feel like I was going to die so I ran with it.

I'M SO GLAD THE THIGH RIDING MET EXPECTATIONS BECAUSE I REWROTE IT SO MANY TIMES!!! AGGGHHH!!!

Also; YES bby. You 100% called it. He has paid attention to her all of this time because he's never actually hated her like she thought he has. How else is he supposed to respond to her hating him? Just ignore it? No way, he's going to play the game right back because like you said, it's better than nothing!

You're also onto something with the Max situation! She's not worried that it's true, she's just worried about others finding out!

PLEASE LET ME KNOW YOUR HUNCH. I live for the predictions. Seriously, please tell me!

I'm glad that you enjoyed the Max POV! It was so refreshing and fun to write, it felt like something new, flip the script y'know? I planned on doing it and kept forgetting and it just fit so well for this chapter I think. Like I could have written it from hers, but it felt so much better from his? Idk! I'm glad you liked it though!!

I ALWAYS enjoy your rants so please continue to send them in or send any asks at all because I love to hear from you 🥰 ILYSM!!!! ❤️❤️❤️ MUAH 😘😘😘