#what do i do once i finish all 3 seasons

[mmkayokay]

Watching broadchurch to fill the david tennant shaped hole in my heart except it's actually really good

Plus david tennant in glasses cmon

[xxplastic-cubexx]

chat i think im gonna be sick

(Powers of X #6)

[charlesemersonwinchesteriii]

[got-eggs]

i am slow cooking the most delicious of concoctions in the kitchen rn

(my tags are so long lol whole half ass recipe down there)

[nomairuins]

had 2 take a break 2 think abt a different one of my princesses. back 2 it

[starsofthestorm]

I think it's insane that even in a wonderful community like marching band I have witnessed people receive death threats for simply not liking the blue devils

[posh--bee]

hotel room revelations || Spencer Reid

pairing → Spencer Reid x Reader

summary → While on a case, you have to not only share a hotel room but also a bed with the BAU's resident genius Spencer Reid whom you have had a crush on since he first joined the FBI. When you wake up during the night with his arms wrapped around you, previously hidden feelings come to light and you realize that your unrequited feelings for him might not be so unrequited after all.

warnings → sharing a bed, love confessions, early seasons!Spencer, insecure!Spencer, misunderstandings, friends to lovers, reader is part of the BAU, no descriptions or pronouns used for the reader, no y/n used

author’s note → I love the "there was only one bed" trope so of course I had to write it with my beloved genius. I'm so happy to finally finish another fic again so let me know what you think about it! <3 (forgot to post this fic and now my cm obsession fizzled out, oops. But I know it will come back to haunt me sooner or later)

word count → 5.2k

When you wake up in the middle of the night, you’re not too happy about it and not sure who or what to blame for it.

You grumble your dissatisfaction without opening your eyes and the warm body behind you freezes.

Now you’re a little confused and you try to fight off the urge to just drift off again so you can actually form a coherent thought because you don’t remember going to sleep with someone else by your side last night. But thinking is still a little difficult when you’re half-asleep and it takes you an embarrassingly long time to even remember if you’re in your own bedroom right now or in another state in some sort of hotel room because of work, so your memory is not the most reliable source of help at the moment.

The someone behind you still holding you in their arms seems to get a little impatient and tries to slowly move away from you again but you don’t let them, instinctively grabbing their hand that is resting softly against your stomach and interlacing your fingers with theirs to keep it there. You hear a startled little sound close to your ear and feel the someone behind you going rigid, even holding their breath in surprise. Feeling bad about spooking your bedmate so suddenly, you apologize by soothingly stroking up and down their arm that is draped over your waist before going back to holding their hand. You don’t want them to let go of you even though you’re still not quite sure who exactly they actually are—but you’re still working on that.

What you do know, however, is that they’re warm and holding you in a gentle embrace and that you feel very safe and secure in their arms. And that you don’t want it to end.

You smile to yourself in satisfaction when you feel the someone gradually relaxing against you once more and you can finally pick up that derailed train of thought of yours to figure out where you are and why you’re not alone in bed.

But that’s when the someone behind you decides to speak up and solve the mystery at last.

“I… I’m really sorry, but I have to move. My arm’s completely fallen asleep…”

Oh. That’s right.

His voice is quiet, timid even and still laced with sleep, and suddenly you’re feeling a lot more awake than just moments before, your heart immediately picking up speed as you remember how you and Spencer ended up in the same bed together.

You’re currently in a little hotel room in a city halfway across the country because of a case JJ had presented you the day before. Five bodies with a sixth person still missing and the local police had decided to ask for the BAU’s help to stop whoever is responsible for these crimes. Spencer and you started to work on the geographical profile while the rest of the team drove to the scenes of crime and talked to the victims’ families. After working until the middle of the night but without making any considerable progress anymore, Hotch decided it was time to go to the hotel, rest, and return to the case after a good night’s sleep.

The hotel was pretty booked already when you boarded the jet so when you arrived at last in the lobby, exhaustion already weighing heavy on your shoulders and your eyelids dangerously heavy, the team was told they had to share rooms and even ended up with a room with a double bed instead of two single ones.

When JJ first announced this little circumstance at first, you really couldn’t care less. Somehow, your tired brain didn’t really consider that you would be one of the people staying in the room with a double bed and much less who would be the other person with you. But when Morgan sauntered over to you, letting the key ring spin around his finger, a wicked gleam in his eyes, you knew nothing good would come of it.

With a smirk he pressed the keys into your hand and announced that you and Spencer would be the lucky pair to share the room with the double bed, giving you a wink that made you want to kill him just a little bit. Morgan knows very well about your little, not all that serious crush on your coworker and makes a point to tease you about it whenever he can, which, unfortunately for you, is very often. Your only consolation is that Spencer is too oblivious to pick up on it even though Derek makes sure everyone and their mother knows how you feel about the young doctor. He obviously claims it’s only because he’s playing cupid and can’t stand the two of you dancing around each other for eternity, but you know for a fact that he’s obviously doing it for his own entertainment as well. Besides, playing cupid only gets you so far when only one person has feelings for the other one—which you’re painfully aware is the case for you and Spencer.

With an especially dirty eyeroll you grabbed the keys and turned to look at Spencer who gave you one of his signature tight-lipped awkward smiles. He didn’t look very happy at the prospect of having to share not only a room but also a bed with you and you tried your hardest not to take it personally. You know Spencer values his personal space so having to spend this and the following nights with another person next to him is nothing to look forward to for him—even if it’s with a good friend.

You masked your disappointment and bruised feelings with a small smile of your own and led the way toward the elevators at the end of the hotel lobby, pointedly ignoring Morgan’s teasing voice telling you to have a good night. You silently swore to yourself that you would get back at him for all of this when the case was solved and over, but right now you were more worried about surviving the next few nights of having Spencer so close to you yet completely out of your reach.

Dealing with your unrequited feelings for the young doctor on a daily basis wasn’t always easy for you but you contended yourself with being his coworker and friend even though it hurt more than you cared to admit. In the beginning, you hoped that your feelings would go away if you just ignored them—after all, it was just a stupid little crush on your adorable and dorky new coworker. But as time went on, and you were still plagued by an eruption of butterflies in your stomach whenever Spencer smiled at you, or accidentally brushed your hand with his when handing you a pen or a cup of coffee, or just stood near you for an extended period of time, you had to admit to yourself that your feelings for him were far more serious than you anticipated at first. The thought of just confessing to Spencer had crossed your mind a lot at this point, to get it off your chest, but the possibility of him rejecting you and losing one of your best friends in the process scared you too much to actually go through with it.

And before you knew it Spencer went on a date with JJ and made out with a gorgeous blonde actress in her pool and flirted with pretty barkeepers, and that was proof enough for you that keeping your feelings to yourself was the right course of action which didn’t mean it saved you from heartbreak or feeling sorry for yourself.

You started to distract yourself with alcohol and attractive strangers between cases, collecting fleeting memories with partners who never really helped you forget the one person who was always on your mind and in your heart. You went on like this until you could hardly look at yourself in the mirror anymore, feeling disgusted and ashamed of yourself, knowing that it would only get worse but still not stopping, telling yourself it was the price you had to pay for not having to spend the nights all by yourself. It was until you drunkenly stumbled into the apartment of yet another stranger, hurriedly opening buttons and zippers, carelessly tossing clothes to the floor, giggling when the stranger’s lips connected to yours despite feeling sick to your stomach. You saw it only when the stranger moved to press open-mouthed kisses to your neck; a photo of the stranger’s family, beautiful children and an adoring partner smiling brightly for the camera, and you wondered if you would ignore this too now that you have seen it, like you ignored the noticeable mark on the stranger’s finger where a wedding ring was clearly missing.

You felt faint when you pushed against the stranger’s shoulders, almost falling over your own two feet leaving the apartment only to find yourself in a part of town you were completely unfamiliar with in the middle of the night. Not knowing what else to do, you called Morgan who picked you up sitting on the curb, looking and feeling pathetic with tearstains on your face. He simply raised his eyebrows at you and wordlessly helped you into his car before driving back to his place. There, he gently wrapped you up in a blanket and cuddled with you on his old sofa for the entire length of three feel-good chick flicks all while alternating between handing you spoons of ice cream and tissues to dry your tears, listening to you in the early hours of the morning spilling your guts to him.

Thankfully, he never talked to you about that night again and you were grateful for it; otherwise, you would probably die on the spot from all the shame and embarrassment it would trigger in you. You had still apologized for inconveniencing him like this, staring at his shoes while stumbling over your words, fingernails biting into the palm of your hands. But Derek acted like he didn’t know what you were talking about, flashing you one of his defeating handsome smiles and you knew that all was good between you two, he was still your friend and didn’t think any less of you, so you pulled him down to press a grateful kiss to his cheek.

It didn’t however save you from Derek wiggling his eyebrows at you whenever Spencer and you sat pressed shoulder to shoulder absorbed in case files or when the two of you would share headphones on the jet while returning home. You are used to it by now, simply sticking your tongue out at him or giving him the finger when Hotch and JJ aren’t looking, earning a good-natured laugh from Derek and a confused glance from Spencer, who, to your relief, never quite understands what the constant teasing between you and the older agent is about.

So yes, after seeking pointless comfort with strangers until the point you almost didn’t recognize yourself anymore, you now are at a point where you would say that generally, you are just fine with knowing that Spencer would never see you as anything other than a good friend and coworker.

But after an exhausting day working on a grueling case, having made close to zero progress on it, and having to share a hotel room and a bed with Spencer only to wake up to him holding you in his arms, you really wish the universe would give you a break one of these days so you could take the time to get over your feelings for your genius friend once and for all.

You sigh quietly, willing your racing heart and those malicious butterflies in your stomach to calm down before letting go of Spencer’s hand, trying your best to ignore the pang of disappointment. The feeling only worsens when Spencer moves away from you, carefully putting some distance between yourself and him, taking all his warmth with him and you can’t help but to curl into yourself at that.

You feel him settle on the other side of the bed, already missing his touch even as fleeting as it was, feeling wide awake and wondering how you will ever fall asleep again tonight after that—and the nights still to come.

“I’m so sorry for ambushing you like that,” Spencer’s quiet voice cuts through the silence of the room, his bashfulness palpable with every word. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”

“You didn’t, Spence. Don’t worry.” Quite the opposite, but you keep that thought to yourself, opting for lightening the mood instead. “You didn’t make me uncomfortable. I mean, I had to share a bed with Emily before and I woke up to her having me in a chokehold so I prefer having you as my bedmate by a mile.”

You’re blessed with a little laugh from Spencer, your body relaxing against the unfamiliar mattress but still missing his closeness from before. You feel him shift on his side of the bed and can’t help but wonder if he too was more comfortable with holding you in his arms. But you quickly dismiss this silly thought of yours, knowing that indulging in false hopes and wishful thinking doesn’t save you from the reality that Spencer just doesn’t feel the same way as you.

“But I’m serious. You didn’t make me uncomfortable,” you reiterate after a moment of silence between the two of you, slowly turning around for a more comfortable position which isn’t in the slightest related to the fact that like this you are facing Spencer now. You can’t really make out his features in the darkness of the hotel room but maybe it’s for the best. Otherwise, you probably would give into the temptation of reaching out and brushing a few unruly curls of his behind his ear, your fingers softly lingering on his face just a tad too long.

“That’s—I’m glad…” His voice is quiet, almost distant, and you wonder if he’s already drifting off to sleep again. You couldn’t blame him for that. The day the two of you had was long and wearying, coming into work just to be presented with gruesome pictures from various crime scenes, discussing the UnSub’s profile and MO while being on the jet before being introduced to police officers and grieving family members alike, getting to work without a single break on your mind. If it wasn’t for these inconvenient feelings of yours that caused your heart rate to resemble that of someone who just ran a mile, you would probably feel as exhausted as Spencer is. But in your case, sleep is currently not really something you can think about when all you want is to curl up in his arms like before, feeling warm and safe and happy until the harsh reality of the next morning catches up with you again.

“Still, I’m sorry,” Spencer then whispers into the darkness, your name leaving his lips in a soft sigh, and you frown. There’s really nothing he has to apologize for and you want to tell him as much, but he’s faster than you, his words coming out in a self-conscious rush.

“I’m sorry that you are stuck here with me. I know you’d prefer being with Morgan instead and I’m sorry that he’s being such an idiot about all of this.”

Now you really don’t know what he’s talking about. What does Derek have to do with anything? But Spencer doesn’t let you voice your thoughts, only to confuse you even more.

“I-I know you like Morgan so you were probably hoping that he would just assign this room to himself and you, and I really don’t get why he’s so set on acting like he doesn’t have feelings for you as well. I get he’s not really someone who does relationships but he’s lucky that someone special like you is in love with him so—”

“Spencer, stop—” you suddenly interrupt this agitated rambling of his, trying to wrap your head around the fact that he’s somehow convinced you have feelings for your fellow agent. “Wha-What are you talking about? I’m not in love with Derek Morgan. We’re friends, but that’s really all there is to it. What on earth makes you think that I like him like that?”

You push yourself up on your elbow in your bewilderment, the sheet that covers you and Spencer falling from your shoulders in the process. You quickly turn around, turning on the light by your bedside, not believing what nonsense you just heard. Dumbfounded, you look at the genius lying beside you, his expression confused and apologetic in return.

“I’m—sorry?” he starts while sitting up slightly so the two of you are at eye level, his voice hesitant and uncertain. “I just thought… The two of you are always together, even outside of work, on the weekends. And you have all these little private jokes with Morgan and conversations that always stop whenever someone else gets closer. And he always makes you laugh and flustered, so I just figured—you know, that you like him more than just a friend or a coworker.”

He takes a deep breath and looks away, his fingers fiddling with the hem of the stiff hotel sheet while you can only stare at him open-mouthed.

“And I figured that he’s an idiot for not realizing that he’s the luckiest man on earth to have your heart.”

The silence in the dim hotel room stretches on while Spencer pointedly avoids meeting your eyes and you continue to stare at him, your mind still trying to process that he is convinced about your feelings for Morgan when your heart only belonged to Spencer for a long time now, when you wish for nothing but to wake up in his arms like you just did every day for the rest of your life.

You reach for him and grab his face, holding him in place when he’s startled by your sudden action and the intense eye contact, his eyes widening in confusion and shock but you don’t care. You can’t. There’s a sudden need in you for him to understand how wrong he is about your alleged feelings for Morgan, to make him see the truth that was always right in front of him.

So you resolutely look into his eyes, ignoring the subtle trembling of your fingers against his soft skin and the ringing of your own heartbeat in your ears. You’ve experienced explosions going off right next to you, you’ve cornered armed serial killers and ran into possibly lethal situations without a second thought, but somehow you’ve never been as fucking sacred as you are right now. You could ruin everything you have with Spencer with what you are about to say, but you can’t keep it in any longer. You need him to know how you feel about him, how you’ve felt about him for so long now.

“Spencer Reid, you listen to me. I am not in love with Derek Morgan, I never was and I never will be. I can’t believe you’d think that when I’ve been pining for you for literal years now! It’s always been you, I need you to know that. From the moment I saw you standing next to Gideon with that stupidly adorable sweater and that awkward smile of yours, I knew I was done for. So I never want to hear you say that I have feelings for Morgan when I’m in love with you!”

Your voice is shaking throughout your little speech, but you make it to the end, intently staring into Spencer’s eyes who looks back at you with such a stupidly shocked expression that you would’ve laughed at him if not for your heart beating so wildly against your ribcage that it physically hurt.

The silence that follows your confession is oppressive and all-consuming, and you let go of Spencer’s face so he doesn’t fall victim to your nervous urge to sink your fingernails into something. Instead, they bite into the skin of your forearms as you hug your midsection, watching the young genius open and close his mouth multiple times without making a sound, his eyes blinking rapidly.

Dejectedly, you nod to yourself, already putting together a list of romantic comedies in your mind Morgan will have to endure together with you while you pathetically sob into his shoulder, tissues and ice cream keeping you company on your little coffee table in front of the TV.

You didn’t really expect it to end any differently, but it still hurt more than you anticipated. Your eyes begin to sting and you close them, stubbornly fighting the urge to cry. You have enough time for that later, preferably when you’re not sharing a room with Spencer anymore and the case is over, so you take a couple of deep breaths to calm yourself before opening your eyes again.

Spencer is still looking at you with wide eyes, a noticeable blush adorning his cheeks. Any other time you would find this discovery incredibly endearing, but right now, with your heart in pieces and dangerously close to crying, it only reminds you that you can’t take your words back, that now he knows how you feel about him and that your relationship with him will never be the same again, even if the two of you stay friends.

You manage a meek smile that Spencer doesn’t return, and you wonder if his silent reaction to what you revealed to him could be a blessing in disguise after all. You want him to say something, anything, to you but at the same time you don’t know how well you and your bruised heart would handle hearing him say that he doesn’t feel the same way about you out loud.

What you do know is that you can’t stay here any longer, you need to get out of this room, out of this situation, now.

With one last look at Spencer, you avert your eyes, your voice quiet, tinged with regret.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper before sitting on the edge of the bed, your back now to him, only tilting your head back to speak in his direction. “I’ll ask the others if I can stay in one of their rooms for the night.”

You move to stand up and that’s what snaps Spencer out of his daze at last, hurriedly reaching for you before you can get up, much less process what is happening, one of his large hands on your arm while the other is cupping your jaw tenderly, almost hesitantly. The kiss he pulls you into then is the opposite of that. It’s urgent and desperate and completely steals your breath away, your heart leaping into your throat and your stomach lurching in confused delight. Still, it takes you a moment to kiss him back, entirely too overwhelmed to react, but when you do it’s just as urgent, just as desperate. Your teeth clank together slightly but you ignore it in favor of meeting Spencer’s tongue with your own, your head beginning to spin. You’re not sure if it’s from the kiss or the lack of oxygen but you really can’t care less about that at the moment, especially not when you swallow the appreciative groan that falls from Spencer’s lips as one of your hands finds its way into his curls and pulls not all too gently on them.

The kiss only breaks when you’re certain the two of you are running out of air completely but still Spencer whines quietly at the sudden loss of contact, following your lips until the hand in his hair tugs him back. You placate him with a quick peck to his nose before concentrating on calming your heavy breathing and frantically beating heart, your forehead softly resting against his.

You don’t protest when Spencer starts to pull you closer to him, letting him wrap his arms around you and guide you to settle in his lap, your head now resting on his shoulder, humming in contentment at the kiss he presses to the top of your head. You don’t say anything for a while, having no need for words, not when you feel Spencer’s heart mirror the rhythm of yours as you place your hand on his chest.

You look up at him when he covers your hand with his own and brings it to his lips, pressing a kiss to the palm of your hand that makes your skin tingle pleasantly. His eyes swim with emotions but he doesn’t look away as you try to decipher all of them even though his blush reaches from the tip of his ears to somewhere underneath the soft shirt he wears. Your fingers itch to pull the collar of the shirt down a little, just to see how far that blush really goes when he quietly clears his throat, the bright smile on his pretty lips faltering slightly.

“I’m sorry for—for not saying anything just now. I couldn’t—I wasn’t sure you really meant what you said, I just couldn’t believe it wasn’t some sort of joke.”

You shift in his embrace, ready to repeat what you have said, to express what you feel for him until he is sick of hearing your voice, but before you can even open your mouth, he quickly steals a kiss from you, and then another one, effectively shutting you up and looking quite proud of himself too when he meets your eyes again. So you have no choice but to let him finish what he has to say like you always do, always giving him time to collect his thoughts and listening to him when he is ready to share them with you.

“But I know you would never lie to me, especially not about something like this and only then did I realize we could’ve been doing this years ago if I hadn’t been such an idiot and too blind to see what was in front of me all along because—because I’ve been in love with you for a long time now too.”

The smile that spreads on your face is so big it hurts your cheeks, radiant enough to challenge the whole sun and you have to twist your fingers into the front of Spencer’s shirt to pull him down to you so you can feel his lips on yours again. They’re soft and warm and real and when you part again the laugh that bubbles past his is like music to your ears, sending a pleasant shiver down your spine.

You lean further into him and his arms around you tighten in response, enjoying the comfortable silence in this unfamiliar hotel room for a little while longer before gently speaking up again.

“You’re not an idiot Spencer. How could you have known when I’ve always been too scared to say anything? But now I did and we’ve finally found each other, and from now on we can make up for lost time. What do you say, my pretty boy?”

The adoration shining clearly in his brown eyes tells you everything you need to know and you move in to kiss him once more, preferably without ever stopping again, but suddenly Spencer tenses against you, making you look up at him with a quizzical look.

You can’t stop the little groan that escapes you at his next words.

“You and Morgan—did you really never—?”

As your genius worries his bottom lip between his teeth you really wish Morgan would finally stop being a part of your conversation.

“I—I believe what you’ve said, that you don’t have feelings for him,” Spencer continues, “but I’d understand if at some point, you know—because the way you are around each other—"

“Spencer. Let’s not do this again,” you have to interrupt a second time this night, but not unkindly. “Yes, even though I have feelings for you I have slept with other people, but it never meant anything to me—in fact, it just made me feel so, so horrible. And when it comes to Morgan—he and I are friends and that is all there is to it. It’s true I spend a lot of time with him, that we have a lot of little inside jokes and private conversations just for our ears, but do you want to know what the one common factor is with all of these things? It’s you, Spence.”

You emphasize your words with a kiss to his jaw, easing the tentative look he gives you by gently running your fingers through his soft hair.

“Most of the time I spent with Derek was just me whining about how much I wish you were mine and how unfair it is how adorable you look whatever you do and how smart and kind and pretty you are, and that you probably tried to kill me when you wore your glasses to work every day for some time. It’s honestly a miracle Morgan didn’t also develop a crush on you by sheer proximity to me, like through osmosis. He had to listen to me for years pining about you so he gets back at me for it by teasing me relentlessly about you, so I’ll have you know that all of our funny little private jokes are actually at my expense. My point is, even if Morgan would’ve wanted to start something with me—which he never did by the way—, he, and those other people too, never stood a chance because I only ever had eyes for you, Spence.”

“Oh.”

Spencer shakes his head in disbelief but he’s grinning like a fool with his cheeks and ears painted cherry red. He’s quick to hide his face in your hair, too overwhelmed by the sincerity in your voice and you think that now your genius finally, finally understands. But still, you would continue to reassure him about your feelings if his insecurities should get the better of him again, understanding that he doesn’t doubt you but that the voice in his head sometimes isn’t the kindest to him and that everything about this is very new to him.  

You close your eyes, your head resting comfortably against his shoulder until you’re on the brink of falling asleep, the comfortable and content silence of the hotel room and the steady rise and fall of Spencer’s chest steadily lulling you to sleep. After the long day you’ve had and the excitement of this night, exhaustion has now caught up with you and if the big yawn that escapes Spencer is any indication, he is feeling its effect as well.

You’re vaguely aware of Spencer reaching over to turn off the bedside lamp before moving the both of you to lay down together, shifting and coordinating limbs until you’re both comfortable with him holding you in his arms, his hand resting softly on your stomach and your fingers interlacing with his.

You smile to yourself, knowing that from now on you’ll have the privilege of falling asleep like this every night—in the arms of your beloved genius.

[bbrattywise]

SEEKING VALIDATION FROM THE 3D IS SOOOOO LAST SEASON

HEAR YE! HEAR YE! ladies & gents, boys, gals & non-binary pals, i present to you another post brought by urs truly, @bbrattywise : this post was ib: this reddit story

anywho, intros done, let's cut straight to the chase, i think the reason why most ppl struggle with validating themselves from the imagination is we're scared its "lying to ourselves" & its "being delusional" *red buzzer to both answers because those are FAR from right!!*

1) the imagination is REAL, realer than this reality in a sense that whatever u persist in the imagination will quite litreally materialise into ur 3D (because thats litreally how the law of assumption works. You assume in ur imagination/4D and it materialises into the 3D, ya get me??) So no matter what, ur dominant thoughts/assumptions (a.k.a ur dominant thoughts u persisted in ur imagination whether thats being tiktok famous or having ur dream yacht) have no choice but the manifest into the 3D.

2) u not feeling happiness/any sort of positive emotions when visualising/imagining living in end w/ ur desire ≠ it being fake. Because obviously, u having something = u being quite used to it so ofc u are not gonna feel all giddy everytime u think about it. Thats totally normal!! that is the same principle for experiencing "negative emotions". You experiencing any sort of emotion doesn't change the fact that you ALREADY HAVE ur desires in ur imagination, so chillax buttercup! you are not doing anything 'wrong'.

3)"but how do i imagine having my desires?" pls dont overcomplicate yall, i swear its as easy to do as it is to say. Basically pick what u want & acknowledge it being in ur imagination. For example, whenever i be stressing about the 3D i be like "oh yea, i already have it in the imagination which is my true reality" and go about my day. Its as easy as thinking, think as u already have it (because that is quite litreally the case). As Neville Goddard says "creation is finished" which i love falling back to whenever i am in doubt because once you've imagined ur desire, thats it. Thats all you gotta do.

4) find ways to make ur imagination ur fun place. When i started utilising the imagination, i was like "huh, wdym i can litreally imagine WHATEVER?!!" lemme tell u, the imagination is limitless!! It's like playing sims 4 without the restrictions put in place by the developers. You make DA MF RULESSSSSS!! Wanna visualise owning a pet dragon?? the sky's the limit!! its so fun picking things & living out ur imagination knowing that it materialises into the 3D regardless <3

the law of assumption (though a mundane, universal law) is such a beautiful thing to be aware of so utilise this information. Don't dwell in old circumstance because you're scared of change. Trust me, take this leap of faith and really have fun with the law of assumption. After all, its practically a life cheatcode, might aswell use it, right?

divider creds:

[giamee]

𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐘 𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐏 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐃𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐄𝐗𝐀𝐌 𝐒𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐎𝐍!

... aka something super self indulgent because i'm going insane right now

༊*·˚ featuring ➻ the hsr men

༊*·˚ gia's notes ➻ this is probably gonna get posted way after exam season is over but here it is!!! my coping mechanism!!! i have 3 exams in 8 days im gonna explode bro. and before that i had a THREE HOUR STATISTICS EXAM 😀😀

ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 MAKES SURE THAT YOU SLEEP COMFORTABLY.

you've been running yourself into the ground recently with revision- yes, it's important and you need to study to get good grades, as he is more than aware of due to your multiple stressed rants to him when he suggests that you take a break.

it doesn't bother him, not really. he knows that you're beyond stressed right now and don't mean to be so snappy. he just wants to make sure that you're still taking care of yourself despite everything.

he's in your dorm room, not really making much noise, scrolling through reals with his phone on mute, just present to keep an eye on you and get you to take a break whenever it's been a little too long since you've moved from your desk.

it's some time where it's debatable whether it's very late or very early- both of your sleep schedules are fucked- and there comes a little thunk from your desk that interrupts the otherwise silent room.

your boyfriend glances up, smiling in triumph as he sees that you've finally succumbed to the nap that he's been trying to convince you to take for the past... 36 hours? something like that.

and now that your body has finally given in to exhaustion, he springs to action.

you'd been studying for days, you'd done more than enough for your upcoming exam, and a solid few hours of uninterrupted sleep is exactly what you need right now.

he slips off of your bed, his movements quiet and calculated as he sidles up next to you. your glasses are smushed against your face, and he gingerly removes them as gracefully as he can. you stir a little as he does so, and he grimaces, waiting for you to settle again.

it looked like you would wake up if he carried you to your bed- looks like he'll have to improvise.

he snags the fuzzy blanket folded neatly at the foot of your bed, wrapping it around your sleeping form still sat at your desk as best as he can. he then takes one of your smaller pillows, coaxing it between you and the solid wood of your desk as best as he can before admiring his handiwork.

hopefully, you wouldn't wake up with a stiff neck.

and finally, as a cherry on top, he places a kiss to your squished cheek and sits back down to let you take a well-deserved nap.

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ BLADE, gallagher, BOOTHILL ++ your faves!

ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 IS YOUR PERSONAL ASSISTANT WHILE YOU'RE STRESSING.

you don't have to lift a single finger when he's around. luckily for you, his exams finished a lot earlier this term than yours did, leaving him ample time to help you as much as he is capable of.

and what an attentive boyfriend he is! amidst all the stress, you can't help but swoon for him all over again because of how attentive he's being towards you. he just wants you to help you study and not worry about anything else!

if you're hungry, he'll have a plate of food ready for you before the request has even left your mouth. your back or neck is aching due to being hunched over? his strong hands are rubbing circles into the muscle, making you sigh contentedly as the stiffness melts away.

he's honestly like an angel in your time of need.

you feel guilty about how one-sided this all is, but he merely smiles, giving you a quick kiss and assuring you that he understands and just wants you to do well. you almost cried because of how sweet he was being.

once these exams are over, you're definitely going to make it up to him.

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ GEPARD, jing yuan, sunday ++ your faves!

ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 ACTS AS YOUR TEMPORARY STUDY PARTNER.

despite not doing your degree, he's clever, and he knows enough without googling to help you out when you revise.

he's an advocate for the "teach someone about a subject until they understand it as well as you do" and luckily for you, he's all ears... and even if he does get some things a little quicker than your fried brain can explain, he still bites his tongue and plays a little dumb to probe you further with questions to test your understanding.

it'll help in the exam.

you've decided that this is way better than being cramped in a booth in the library- you have the freedom to wave your arms around and pace the room, to fully illustrate your thoughts and knowledge as he flips through the colourful flashcards that you made, reading the answers on the back of each of them, grilling you on the questions like a tiger mum.

he'll be damned if you don't get an A.

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ dan heng, DR RATIO, welt ++ your faves!

ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 DEFUSES YOU WHENEVER YOU'RE GETTING TOO STRESSED.

in the days leading up to your exams, it was best to describe your stomach as a pit of nerves. it was honestly distracting you from revising, all the pent up anxiety that churned within you until you were on the verge of a meltdown.

and while you may be too stressed to realise all of this and do something about it, your boyfriend's watchful eye realises this.

and so he does what he does best- he makes you feel better.

he pulls your body to rest against his where he lies in your bed, his large hand drawing comforting circles up and down your spine- and after a few minutes he can feel you melt into him, your body finally releasing the pent up stress that it's been holding for too long.

"it's ok to take a break, honey."

you sigh into him, and he hugs you tighter.

"c'mon, let's go outside for a few minutes. it'll help you feel a lot better."

you shake your head.

"you wanna just stay here for a bit?"

he feels you nod against his chest.

"ok, then let's do that."

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ SAMPO, luocha, AVENTURINE ++ your faves!

IF YOU LIKED THIS, TRY ... do you want somebody like i want somebody?

the sweet and caring nature of the hsr men is also shown through them being your roommate <3

[luckykiwiii101]

“I Look Forward To Never Seeing You Again.”

XOXO | GOSSIP GIRL | XOXO | GOSSIP GIRL | XOXO | GOSSIP GRL

XOXO | GOSSIP GIRL | XOXO | GOSSIP GIRL | XOXO | GOSSIP GRL

P.S. Most important post ever! Lots of content, has to be read thoroughly and carefully to ensure full understanding!!! No skimming allowed here!!

ィ⠀TABLE OF CONTENTS⠀࿐

1. UNDERSTANDING THE LAW

2. IDENTIFYING ALL STRUGGLES/FEARS

3. GETTING RID OF ALL STRUGGLES/FEARS

4. HAVING A CLEAR DESIRE

5. ASSUMING & FEELING

6. PERSISTENCE

Hey Upper East Siders.

Now that halloween is over, it’s not long till the spooky chill of October turns into the icy chill of November. Hot cup of chocolate in one hand, and your dream life in the other.

Once upon a December ago, the only thing you held in both hands was incompetence and procrastination. Notice how I didn’t mention failure? Well that’s because, you can’t fail with a correct procedure. And the only thing that should be falling next season, is snow, not you.

And to the old state? Oh how we never look forward to seeing her again. Because after reading this post, you will break free from all your limitations and fulfill your every desire.

Are you ready to say goodbye to the old state? For good this time, that is. Because you’re not going another year without your dream life, not on my watch. And not on your watch either.

ィ⠀UNDERSTANDING THE LAW⠀࿐

As we all know, understanding the law of assumption is the most important thing ever. There are two very, and I mean VERY important concepts of the law that you need to understand. Here they are -> CREATION IS FINISHED!!!

-> Read this post by Edward Art and read it thoroughly!

-> CLICK HERE TO READ

-> KEY QUOTES: “Creation is finished.”

“In order for us to desire, there must be fulfilment of that desire.” -> This means you cannot have a desire, without a version of you that already has it existing. So whatever you are desiring right now, there is a version of you that has it. What I mean by “there’s a version of you that already has it”, means that there is a version of you that has it in the 4D. Your inner self has it. You just have to become aware of that version ( BECOME that version in imagination and fully identify with that version).

“These are versions of YOURSELF. THEY ARE YOURS.” -> Without this understanding, people think that they cannot achieve their desires because it’s “too far away” and out of reach. How can something be out of reach when you already have it when creation is finished? There is nothing external when it comes to the law of assumption. Everything is within you. Your dream life comes from you. There is no magical force outside of you that gives you what you want. Is your awareness far away from you? Is your awareness out of reach? No, and neither are your desires, because they are you. Change what you are aware of.

Now onto the MOST important understanding!

-> INNER SELF IS YOUR REAL SELF!!!

-> Read this post by Edward Art and read it thoroughly!!!

-> CLICK HERE TO READ

KEY QUOTES: “IDENTIFY yourself FULLY with the INNER MAN.” -> When you do not fully identify yourself with the inner self, you start to identify with the outer self. And the outer self holds nothing but doubt, fear and struggle. But when you fully identify with your inner self, I promise you, those doubts, fears and struggles no longer exist.

“The outer man sees nothing but limitations.” -> You know that when you start to feel fear & doubt, that you are identifying with the outer man. Limitations don’t exist within your inner self. You need to understand that your inner self = consciousness. When you are changing what you are aware of, you are changing what you are conscious of. Your consciousness has NO limitations, because you are God/Creator of your reality. All your limitations come from the outer self, and when you no longer identify with your outer self, all those limitations no longer exist, and you will no longer feel them. And that is a promise.

NOTE: Your inner self is truly your real self. Because the outer self reflects the inner self. The one within is who creates! The 4D reality is the real reality because the 3D cannot exist without it!!! The 3D is FULLY dependent on the 4D! Not the other way around. To understand this concept further, CLICK HERE

ィ⠀IDENTIFYING ALL STRUGGLES/FEARS⠀࿐

✩ Being and Having becomes difficult when you have underlying doubts, fears and struggles. You may be stopping yourself from fully identifying with the Inner self without even realising.

✩ Right now, and yes I mean right now, open up your notes app, or get a paper and pen, and ask yourself :

“What do I struggle with when manifesting?”

“What are my fears and doubts when manifesting?”

✩ Really take the time to think about what you struggle with and write down your answers. Be completely honest with yourself, no sugarcoating.

ィ⠀GETTING RID OF ALL STRUGGLES/FEARS⠀࿐

-> Now that you’ve identified all your struggles & fears, I want you to think about where those doubts, fears etc are coming from.

-> I promise you one thing, there is only one simple answer to this question. The answer is “Identification with the OUTER self.”

-> ALL and I mean it, ALL of your doubts & fears come from the outer self. The one who is currently experiencing the 3D. No matter what your doubts and fears are, they come from the outer self. Remember the previous quote, “The outer man sees nothing but limitations.”

-> ALL your struggles will disappear when you identify with the Inner self. Your inner self is limitless and it’s all you need to manifest your dream life.

-> You do not need to do subconscious training and meditations etc to get rid of your struggles and fears and doubts, all you need is yourself. Nothing external will help you. You NEED to understand that the ONLY way to get rid of your struggles is to STOP identifying with the 3D (your outer world & self), and to FULLY identify with the 4D (your inner world & self).

-> NOTE: Unidentifying with the 3D doesn’t mean to ignore the 3D. You are still experiencing the 3D in your day to day life, you simply cannot ignore it. All you can do is just not identify with it. How do you do this? When you experience the 3D, you do not assume that your 3D self is the real you, because your inner self is the real you! You view the 3D as nothing but an illusion based on past assumptions.

-> Now you may be thinking, “So how do I identify with the inner self.” We will come to that later in this post. I will take you through creating and maintaining assumptions and fully identifying with your Inner self and completely un-identifying with the outer self.

ィ⠀HAVING A CLEAR DESIRE⠀࿐

✩ It’s important to know what you want to manifest. That’s what we call desire. It all starts with desire. Make sure you know what you want to give to your inner self. Know who you want to become.

✩ You also need to know how you are going to go about giving your inner self this desire and fully identifying with it.

✩ Right now, make a list of what you are going to manifest (give to your inner self). Know what you truly, deeply want and promise to stick to it.

ィ⠀ASSUMING & FEELING⠀࿐

✩ Now this is the part where people get confused. If you don’t know already, FEELING is the secret. FEELING is what manifests. Your 3D conforms when the feeling (having your desires) is natural to you.

-> CLICK HERE to read my post about feeling and what the “feeling” is. This is a slightly simplified version of Edward Art’s post. If you want further understanding (which you need), to read Edward’s post CLICK HERE

-> Now that you know what the feeling is, you need to know how to practise it. How to use your senses to imagine and accept. Luckily for you, here is the perfect explanation of how you should be imagining. -> CLICK HERE

-> SUMMARY of what your imagining “process” should look like :

-> STEP 1: Remembering that your only goal is to become who you want to be in IMAGINATION only!!

-> STEP 2: Give yourself whatever you want in imagination through the use of any methods that you prefer. Experience having it in imagination with the knowledge that the inner self in the real self. You cannot deny being when you experienced it.

✩ NOTE: -> Make sure that you know which methods fulfill you. If affirming does not feel natural to you, then choose another method of imagining etc visualising may feel more natural to you. Keep in mind that if you are someone who visualises but has to look at a picture to visualise properly, do not rely on anything external like a picture. Because you do not always have access to a picture of what you want to experience in imagination. Yes, you can visualise when looking at pictures, videos etc, but when you do not have access to those pics and vids, make sure that you use other senses rather than trying to visualise something you want and failing then feeling unfulfilled because the vision didn’t turn out how you wanted it to sue to intrusive thoughts etc. In other words, do what truly fulfills you! It doesn’t matter what method you use as long as you allow the feeling of the wish fulfilled and focus completely on that feeling.

✩ NOTE 2: When visualising, start by feeling fulfilled through deciding etc or any other method, then start to visualise with the feeling because that feeling generates scenes, vaunts, affs FOR you and it is SO much more natural.

-> STEP 3: Allowing the feeling of the wish fulfilled when you are experiencing having your desires in imagination. Fully focusing on the FEELING having your desires as your inner self in imagination gives you! You know for a fact that you aren’t waiting for anything and that you have your desires without a doubt in imagination.

-> STEP 4: FULLY identifying with your INNER self and completely disregarding your 3D self. This is what true persistence is. Continuing to identify with your inner self regardless of what feelings and thoughts the outer self tries to impose on you.

ィ⠀PERSISTENCE⠀࿐

✩ Now for the final part. Persistence. Without persistence, you aren’t being who you want to be.

PERSISTING = Completely identifying with the inner self regardless of what feelings and thoughts the outer self tries to impose on you.

-> When you are persisting you have to fully become and maintain your identification with the inner self and the inner self only.

-> Read this post by Edward Art on identifying with the inner self -> CLICK HERE

-> You have to completely immerse yourself in the inner self because that is the real you! This is what true persistence is because identifying with the inner self means to no longer doubt, fear or struggle.

-> Now for the last part of persisting, you have to stay CONSISTENT!!!

ィ⠀COMMIT TO CHANGING SELF⠀࿐

You have to completely commit to your new story. No half arsing it. The inner you (4D) is your new dwelling state. NO more dwelling in the 3D.

STEP ONE: Decide what you want

STEP TWO: Imagine & Feel -> When dwelling in the feeling of the wish fulfilled, when you are done imagining, tell yourself “I know for a fact that I have my desires right now in imagination and that the inner me is the real me.” -> If you do not believe this with 100% certainty, you cannot move on with whatever you are doing. GO BACK TO IMAGINATION AND CORRECT THAT FEELING SO THAT YOU FEEL WITH 100% CERTAINTY THAT YOU HAVE WHATEVER YOU WANT IN IMAGINATION BECAUSE THE INNER YOU HAS IT!!! YOU DO NOT VIEW IT AS A DESIRE BECAUSE YOU ARE 100% FULFILLED!!!

-> Read my post on how to imagine correctly (CLICK HERE)

-> Read Edward Art’s post on imagining for an example (CLICK HERE!)

STEP THREE: Persist! If you do not imagine and feel with 100% certainty that you have your “desires” in imagination, then you cannot consider yourself to be persisting. You can’t just half be in the state. You have to fully be in the state of the wish fulfilled. And the only way to do that is by fully identifying with your inner self.

-> You are not focusing on the confirmation of the 3D. That worry comes from the outer self. KEEP GOING BACK TO IMAGINATION NO MATTER WHAT!!!

-> You are going to do this EVERY.SINGLE.TIME your “desires” come to mind. No excuses. There is nothing to change but self. Imagine whatever you want and identify with it.

Wondering what to “do” when experiencing 3D circumstances?

-> You are NOT supposed to be “ignoring” the 3D. How can you ignore something that is right in-front of you. You have to view the 3D as nothing but an illusion based on past assumptions!!! This is how you unidentify with the 3D! It has nothing to do with you because it is nothing but an ILLUSION based on PAST assumptions!!!

-> If you “fall” out of the state, it’s okay don’t curse at yourself. Just go back to imagination and feeling. Also if you find yourself naturally thinking from your old assumptions, just go back to imagination and feeling. Nothing can “ruin” or “stop” your manifestations because you already have it!!!

-> No matter what, keep going back to imagination and feeling! No matter what you feel, go back to imagination and feeling! No matter how difficult the 3D is, go back to imagination and feeling! The 3D has nothing to do with you once you stop identifying with it!

-> If 3D circumstances get too much for you, go back to imagination. The answer to everything is, just simply go back to imagination. Seek proof in imagination. It is your safe place. Make it your safe place by evicting the outer world from your inner world. Create a beautiful world for yourself in there. You always have access to imagination. You always have access to the feeling.

-> There are no excuses to not persist, especially after reading this post!

P.S. Make sure you’ve read every post i’ve linked throughout this post! They are extremely important!!

-> People with the success stories are the ones who have fully identified with the inner self. -> @loasuccessarchive

-> Read my favourite success story quotes (CLICK HERE)

You have no excuses. Go give yourself your dream life. December’s coming. And Santa’s not going to drop your dream life down your chimney. Give yourself a holly jolly Christmas, and a dream life to feel thankful for on thanksgiving. You know you love me. XOXO

- gossip girl

[soleilchanson]

Boxer!Sukuna who dedicates his first ever win to you

Note: female reader

Masterlist

Your heart was racing. Sukuna had prepared you for the fact that boxing arenas could get overwhelming with the constant yelling and cheering for violence, but you still felt uneasy watching your boyfriend receive punch after punch.

You knew your boyfriend was just a rookie boxer but you couldn’t help but pray that by some miracle, he would be able to defeat his opponent. He had been training specifically for this match for the past two months and had sacrificed his blood, sweat and tears for it. It didn’t help that his opponent was a seasoned winner.

Your chest tightened as Sukuna was struck down once again. All you could think about was how he would study his opponent’s moves late at night while you stayed up with him. You pressed your hands together, hoping that he would win by some miracle.

Almost as if on cue, Sukuna managed to dodge a critical hit and wound his arm to absolutely knock out his opponent. The other fighter fell on to the ground and did not get up even after the countdown. The referee grabbed Sukuna’s hand and raised it in the air as the crowd erupted in cheers.

You let out a sigh of relief and clapped as loudly as possible for your boyfriend’s triumph. It was his first win as a professional boxer. He was going to start making a name for himself pretty soon and you could only imagine what was to come after. He deserved this. It was all because of his hard work and resilience.

Sukuna’s tired eyes searched for yours in the VIP box and you smiled at him. He returned an exhausted one back to you and proceeded to do something you never expected.

He kissed his fingers and pointed to you, all your friends and in the VIP box began clamoring with teases and giggles.

Even while being adorned with his belt, Sukuna’s eyes never left yours. He mentioned earlier that your presence was integral to his success but you never knew it was to such a degree. You blew him a flowing kiss and he chuckled at the sight. He didn’t even bother to look at the cameras looming around him until his manager told him to pose for the pictures.

Of course, after his first win, he was immediately subject to a press conference. He sulked at first, hoping that he could share at least a moment with you before being bombarded with questions but he decided to get it over with so he could go home soon.

“Mr. Sukuna, how do you feel after your first win.”

“Fucking tired.” Your bruised and battered boyfriend replied. The crowded erupted into a few giggles and murmurs at his deadpan reply.

“Would you like to mention any people that helped you become a good fighter?”

“Aside from my coach, I want to dedicate my win to my girlfriend. She put up with a lot of my shit while training.”

You giggled at his reply from backstage. Supporting wasn’t a chore but it was extensive work. Cooking twice the amount of food so he could bulk, constantly having your sleep disturbed because he would train in the early hours of the morning, and not go too crazy when you ate out on dates was difficult but well worth the effort.

-

After the press conference, you two were back home. Sukuna had retired to your bedroom while you did the finishing touches of your night time skin care.

“The winner of today’s fight commands his woman’s presence.” Your boyfriend called out, urging you to hurry up. You put away your containers and walked to the bedroom. “I’m here, your majesty.” You sarcastically replied as you laid down next to him. He had a frown on his face from being alone.

He opened up the blanket to let you in and slotted you next to him with your back facing his chest. His arms wrapped around you as he tucked your head under his chin. “I forgot to congratulate you earlier.” You speak out.

He hums and squeezes you. “Thanks. Only took you 3 hours to say that.” You could almost feel him sulk.

“Can you blame me? You were surrounded by people. I needed to let you have your moment.” You reasoned.

“What about when we were driving back? It was just you and me in the car.”

“You fell asleep as soon as your ass touched the seat.”

He scoffed at your reply and pushed you away. “Whatever, it’s not like getting a congratulatory kiss from my girlfriend was the only thing I wanted.” He said as he turned his back you.

This man was a big baby. The world saw him as an upcoming and fearful fighter but here he was sulking over the fact that you didn’t give him attention.

You giggled and rubbed his back to soothe him. “I can still give you a congratulatory kiss if you want.” For a second, you swore that he almost turned around but he gave you the silent treatment instead. “Kuna,” you whined. As much as you cringed while saying it, you knew using that nickname was his weakness.

“What?”

“I’m sorry, baby. Let me give you the kind of kiss a winner deserves.” You said as you rubbed his stomach. The man turned around, eyes not meeting yours. He was still sporting the frown from earlier.

You held his face in your hands. Your fingers traced his tattoos and you could see his eyes rapidly moving because of your touch. You giggled and moved your fingers to his lips. Luckily, his opponent missed them during the fight so you could easily kiss him.

You slowly pressed your lips against his and he immediately reciprocated. While your touch was delicate with your hand on cradling face, his touch was rougher. His hand entwined in your hair as his body pressed to yours. Your tongue entered his mouth and he gladly welcomed it which a slight suck.

His free hand travelled down to your waist and rolled you on top of him. The kiss would’ve gotten more heated if he didn’t wince all of a sudden.

“What’s wrong, Kuna?”

He propped you back down on the bed. And grabbed the area right beneath his chest. “Ah shit, I forgot about my rib getting bruised.” You grimaced at the thought of him being in pain.

“Want me to get some ice? I can always sleep on the couch so I don’t end up accidentally kicking you.” You said out of concern.

His eyes widened and he quickly shook his head. “Don’t worry, it’s not that bad.” He grabbed ahold of your waist again and just pulled you close to him. “I didn’t win that trophy so my girlfriend could sleep on the couch. And since I’m a boxing champion, I can handle a few punches from you.”

“But-“

“Shush.” He pecked you on the lips to keep you from protesting. “This is how I wanna celebrate my first win. With you next to me.”

[jamminvroomvroom]

die for you.

ln x driver!reader

in which you can’t stand each other, or so you say…

this took waaaay too long for me to hate it sm but she’s here! and she’s long! love this concept so much, thank you for this request. so many feels so many vibes, tell me what you think <3

loosely inspired by die for you by the weeknd

warnings: 18+!! minors dni!! smut, language, slight glimpses of she fell first, he fell harder, rivals to lovers/enemies to lovers, choking, hate sex? bar fight, mentions of blood

8.3k words (oop)

it’s rare that you miss a podium, so when you do, it tastes bitter and stings like a bitch.

the car has been on fire all season long, a thing of beauty in your calculated hands. so, the string of bad luck you’re enduring, small mistakes with big consequences, it’s quite the pill to swallow.

out of the car you jump, teeth grinding hard out of frustration. you could see the commotion ahead of you, members of the papaya team celebrating their driver. your eyes roll so hard in your head that you feel a lasting ache. you side step members of your team, dodging every single person that tries to talk to you, your comms officer knowing better than to try and engage with you. you know you’re being unreasonable, it was a p5 finish! but it isn’t a podium or a win, so quite frankly, you aren’t interested, and you certainly don’t have any energy left to hear how amazingly well he had driven.

lando fucking norris.

what was once quiet disdain had grown into fully fledged hatred and you fear you’ll be violently sick if you catch a single glimpse of him on the podium. sure, he’s talented, and sure, he’s beautiful, you suppose. that doesn’t mean you have to like him. not anymore. he lives under your skin, inescapable.

you struggle through every interview in the media pen, most of which dissect your recent fall from grace, your mouth forming a hard, unimpressed line every time they mention the orange goblin and his recent streak of podiums and good luck. you wish the journos would bring up his string of women and the probable plan b receipts that went with them. that, you would love to talk about.

you drive in silence back to your hotel, leaving the track as soon as possible, and quickly find solace in your bed for the night. the idea of seeing the inside of a club makes you nauseous after your epic downfall. as your eyes are drooping, your body going limp under the thick duvet, a knock sounds from the door.

“no.” you shout flatly, but the only response you get are giggles from the hallway. for fuck sake, you mutter, groaning as you shift out from beneath the covers and trail apprehensively towards the door.

george and alex appear before you, and you throw your head back is exasperation.

“mate, it’s 9:30.” alex laughs, taking in your fancy attire; pyjamas that you’ve had since you were 17.

“what’s your point?” you croak, glaring up at your obnoxiously tall friend.

“why aren’t you getting ready to go out?” george questions, leaning against the doorframe. he, too, was obnoxiously tall, you thought, feeling the strain in your neck as you move your glare onto him.

“if it wasn’t obvious, i’m not going.” you deadpan, crossing your arms over your chest. “i thought that was clear after i ignored all 77 of your texts.” you smile sarcastically, rubbing sleep from your eyes.

“don’t be boring! you’re an f1 driver, you’re in a cool city, you’re rich and, let’s face it,” he sasses. “you need to get laid.” alex says, like it’s the most causal thing in the world. your eyes bulge out of your head at the utterance of the last bit. george bites back laughter.

“choosing to ignore that.” you hiss. “i’m sorry but i refuse to go out and celebrate that arrogant, whiny little bitch.”

they both know exactly who you’re talking about.

you and lando have simply never seen eye to eye. your karting days were spent pushing one another off the track or into a muddy puddle if things got a bit heated out of the car. sure, olive branches were extended, and maybe adolescent feelings were secretly harboured, but he never gave you any reason to tell him that. you’d grown out of the childish violence when you graduated into formula 1, but you hadn’t been able to shake the rage he made you feel.

it didn’t matter how many dinners you attended where others had conspired and forced you to sit next to each other. it didn’t matter how many times you turned up to play padel and were met with the same lame excuses of ‘oh, did we not mention lando would be here?’ it didn’t matter how many times you’d hugged it out on the podium while adrenaline and tensions were running high.

it didn’t matter how many times he’d watched you from across a crowded room and you’d found his eyes, watched him back. it didn’t matter how many times he’d smirked at you at the start of a race weekend, made you blush. and it certainly didn’t matter what happened last time you found yourself in a club with him.

you just don’t like him. not anymore. you sleep better at night when you lie to yourself.

~ the last time

you sink shot after shot, cocktail after cocktail; the taste of fruity liquor stains your lips and burns your throat. you feel electric, sizzling with ecstasy and the heat from the flashing lights above your head.

it’s approaching 4am and you can’t recall a time in your life where you’d felt so fucking good. the high of your first win is indescribable.

you’ve lost track of the guys, alex and george have packed it in and gone back to their hotels with their girlfriends. pierre and kika are somewhere in a corner, you’re certain. you’re pretty sure you’ve even seen lewis with his entourage and a brick wall of a bodyguard trailing behind him. and at the bar, a set of eyes watch you.

lando isn’t even listening to oscar anymore, no. he is too entranced in the way your hips move to the beat, lost in the carefree lines your body makes in the crowd. he’s itching to go to you, put his hands in places that would stay between you, him, and god, but he doesn’t think a broken nose would be good for business.

everything changes when you spin around, facing his direction. then, it begins: the same thing that happens every time you end up going out in the same group. you watch one another, pretending you’re not both achingly desperate to find out how the other tastes.

but lando is feeling bold. he tells oscar he’ll see him in the morning, and then, egged on by a moscow mule and a few too many shots, he makes his way towards you. it is instinctual, magnetic, the way he is drawn to you.

hands on your hips, lips on your neck. the song changes. you recognise the weeknd’s voice. you are disappointed in yourself but it feels too good to stop.

you know what i’m thinkin', see it in your eyes
you hate that you want me, hate it when you cry
you’re scared to be lonely, 'specially in the night
i’m scared that i’ll miss you, happens every time

the lyrics sober you up. you’re in the first taxi you can see when you finally get outside.

alone.

~

as much as that memory makes you shiver, for several different reasons, you find yourself putting on some makeup and raking through your suitcase for something to wear. george and alex are waiting downstairs for you at the bar, and when you finally make your way down there, they have a martini waiting for you. they watch in impressed horror as the alcohol disappears from the glass mere seconds after it touches your lips.

“let’s get this over with.” you sigh.

-

it could have been worse, you suppose.

the club is packed, hundreds of faces blurring into nothing. you feel better knowing that there is a one in a million chance of running into lando.

you’re tucked into a booth with alex and george, carmen and lily, a few faces you can’t quite place, and charles and pierre. you’d conspired to sit on the outside, prepared to make a quick getaway at the first sign of tension.

you’d been in a state of fight or flight since your last run in, nails bitten down every time you thought about his hands on you, how good they felt on you. it scared you more than anything had in a long time, how your desire had festered.

you go to take a swig from your glass, only to find it empty, aside from a few sad ice cubes. you watch jealously as they melt into nothing, wishing they would take you with them, shoving your glass across the smooth table top when your frustration boils over.

you’re on edge, ridiculously afraid of bumping into a curly haired man. it wasn’t him you were scared of, per-say, more yourself. god knows what you’d do if you felt those warm, calloused hands pulling your hips into his again.

“you okay?” pierre calls across the table. he and charles abandon their conversation as soon as your glass goes flying towards their side of the table. you’re broken out of your trance, caught off guard like a deer in headlights.

“tired.” you reply, shrugging it off like it was nothing. it’s clear immediately that they don’t buy it.

“she’s hiding.” alex chimes in from beside you, and your elbow goes straight into his ribs. he feigns pain for a moment, cackling at your reaction.

“from who?” charles inquires. you roll your eyes, blush spreading down your neck already. you hate everything about the conversation, and yet you need to see where it goes. you’d planned your escape, and now was the opportune time to make it, but you seem to be glued to the leather of the booth.

“lando.” george smirks into his drink as a he speaks, wiggles his eyebrows.

“oh yeah, we know all about that.” pierre laughs, his head tipping back in amusement.

“what?” you spit, eyes wide with confusion.

“don’t think me and kika didn’t see you two before the summer break. that night you won? we thought you’d finally cave.” pierre explains, his grin conveying pure evil.

several “what?!”’s sound from around the table, and now all eyes are on you.

“nothing even happened.” you mumble. “he came over to me and then i left.” you look away, twisting your hair around your finger. you are sweating.

“you looked like you were minutes away from being arrested for public indecency.” pierre smirks. you almost launch yourself across the table, intent on strangling him, and then perhaps throwing yourself in front of an oncoming uber outside.

“well, well, well. i fucking knew it.” alex is giggling beside you.

“come on guys, leave the poor girl alone.” lily winks at you, but even she has a twinkle in her eye. “there’s obviously feelings there.” and just like that she betrays you. her sympathetic smile doesn’t make you forgive her.

“i think you guys just need to get it out of your system,” charles starts, pausing to take a sip of his drink. “just fuck.” he waves his hand, like it was the most causal thing in the world.

the table erupts in laughter and you decide that you are well past the end of your tether. you shake your head, declaring that you need another drink, or ten, and strut away from the table. a chorus of ‘love you’-s and ‘get some’-s sound from behind you. you reply simply by raising your middle finger and refusing to look back.

the bar is in sight, just about in your reach when your evening goes from mildly bad to aggressively worse.

“fuck sake.” you sigh.

“and good evening to you too.” lando replies. he’s blocking your path, materialising before you out of nowhere.

“get out of my way, lan.” it sounds like you’re pleading and you cringe internally.

“don’t you wanna congratulate me?” he feigns a pout and you almost swing for him.

“no, not particularly.” you say dryly. “all i want is a drink, so if you’d just…” you gesture for him to move. of course, he doesn’t.

“haven’t seen you in a while, though. thought maybe you’d missed me.” he takes a step closer; goosebumps litter your bare skin.

“you are such an entitled prick.” you spit, moving to step around him but he catches you, gripping your wrists and pulling you in. you feel heat radiating off of him, expensive cologne overwhelming you in the best possible way.

“and you, honey, are such a fucking brat. but you don’t hear me complaining, do you?” lando whispers, cool breath hitting your face, minty, laced with champagne and cockiness. you almost fold, thighs clenching so tight that he must have noticed.

“move.” you grumble through gritted teeth. you are crumbling painfully, embarrassingly fast.

“make me.” your underwear is damp, but you are fuming.

“don’t fucking test me, lando.” something in your chest sets on fire and you’re over him and his bullshit, and the way he makes you feel.

“i know you want me.” he dips his forehead down to rest gently against yours. his grip on your wrists tightens, thumbs swirling circles into the flesh, right where your pulse is.

you lean in, mere centimetres separating your lips. his eyes darken, the assumption of victory over you tugs his lips into a smirk.

“all i want is my fucking drink. come find me when you’ve managed to navigate your gigantic, stupid head out of your arse.” you catch him off guard, wriggling out of his grip. you’re shaking when you walk away, thoughts of doing things with him that would get you both fired invading your foggy brain.

you try to disappear into the crowd, finally breathe a sigh of relief when your hands meet the cool surface of the bar. you order your drink, putting it on your tab and drum your nails against the marble top. you’re lost in your own world, watching as concoctions are mixed, as shots are downed. you finally feel at ease, until your evening takes yet another turn, one that was somehow even more unfortunate than all the others.

your attention is rudely stolen by the guy stood next to you.

“can i get that for you?” the random man speaks, in a way that he must of assumed was smooth. slimy, you think. he’s gesturing to your drink, clearly having watched you add it to your bill already.

“no, thank you. it’s already paid for.” you smile politely, turning on your heel. it seems he wasn’t quite done with you. you feel a clammy hand tug on yours, a wave of sickness washes over you.

lando’s hands are bigger, warmer, softer.

“where are you rushing off to, babe?” the sweaty man asks, his tone fake in a way that makes you uneasy.

“i need to get back to my friends.” you try to pull your hand free, but he won’t budge. “can you let go-“

“i can show you a good time. always thought you were kinda hot.” you’re panicking now, looking every which way for a familiar face, a security guard, anyone.

“take your hands off of me.” you snap, still wrestling to pull yourself free.

“one night with me would pull you out of that little slump you’re in.” he leers. you visibly gag, white hot rage blurs your vision.

“okay you piece of shi-“ you snarl, interrupted by a flash of curls and tanned skin.

“she told you to let go.” lando stands in front of you protectively, rigid and furious. you’ve never been so happy to see his annoying(ly beautiful) face.

“and what are you gonna do?”

“hands. off.” lando stands up even straighter, looking bigger than you’ve ever seen him.

“okay, mate, whatever.” the stranger rolls his eyes, shoves your hand away.

lando turns to you, opening his mouth to speak when…

“keep that stuck up bitch all to yourself.”

and then, everything goes to shit.

lando whips around, fists are flying, the stranger topples to the ground, amassed to nothing in the face of the mclaren drivers rage. lando doesn’t stop there, makes sure he is sufficiently dealt with, flat on his back on the sticky floor. you don’t know what to do, calling out for lando, begging him to stop, as satisfied as you are. lando hears your shouts, pulled out of the chaos and back to you. always back to you.

“are you okay?” he has his hands on your face searching for any remaining fear or upset. a crowd has formed and you see alex and george towering above the other club goers, jaws agape.

it’s as if he dj has it out for you, and you realise that the song has changed to something moodier, slower, one that gives you whiplash.

even though we're going through it
and it makes you feel alone
just know that i would die for you
baby, i would die for you

“we need to get out of here. security are coming.” you mutter, keening into his touch.

“i have a car outside.”

“well, let’s use it then.”

-

you can’t help but stroke over his knuckles mindlessly in the car, an unlikely comfortable silence settling between you. they look raw, cracked slightly and you have an overwhelming desire to kiss them better. your head is fuzzy, and you’re unsettled with confusion, but at the same time, you feel lighter.

“why did you do that?” you murmur, disrupting the quiet that has settled over the backseat of the town car, the question burning desperately on your tongue.

lando turns his head so that he’s looking down at you, his good hand comes up to cup your jaw softly.

“no one can talk to you like that.” he’s staring so deeply into your eyes and you almost squirm at the intensity. you feel exposed, bare.

“but why did you step in before that?” you reiterate shakily. lando hums in understanding.

“i’ve known you since we were 10 years old. i know when you’re scared.” he whispers, breath dusting your cheeks. you almost lean in, then, something about his words pull you even closer towards him. you feel warmth creeping over your chest, sinking into the pit of your belly.

“we’ve arrived.” the driver calls from the front, signalling that you need to get out of the car. it was like an elastic band had snapped, and you spring away from lando, scrambling to undo your seat belt, the moment of weakness long gone.

you sneak into the lobby, on the lookout for any angry PR teams or incognito photographers that are scoping for their next pay check. the coast seems clear, so you manage to scurry discreetly into the elevator. you hit the button for the third floor.

“can you hit the button for five?” lando asks, leaning against the opposite wall.

“you’re coming to my room.” you state, offering no other explanation, even when he raises his eyebrows.

the ding of the lift has lando pushing himself off of the mirrored wall, trailing behind you into the corridor. the lights are low as he follows you to your door, hands deep in the pockets of his jeans. he watches in anticipation as you rifle through your small bag for your keycard. the green light gives you the go ahead to open the door, and he awkwardly follows you inside, peering around the room.

you notice the slight apprehension in his features, eyes blown wide from alcohol and adrenaline. they seem to sparkle more than you’d seen in a while, a hazel-y blue twisting with secrets and unspoken thoughts.

“let me find my first aid kit.” you tell him. you guide him towards the foot of your bed, gesture for him to sit. “make yourself comfortable.”

“you don’t need to do this.” lando replies, sitting down anyway.

“and you didn’t need to get between me and that dickhead but here we are.”

your words elicit a low chuckle from him, and you’re glad you have your back to him while you dig through your suitcase. he can’t see your smile at the wholesome sound, and he doesn’t need to.

random pieces of clothing fall out of the bag as you rummage through it, your attention taken up completely by your mission to find the small box. you don’t notice the pile of garments littering the floor.

“wow, didn’t take you for that kinda girl.” lando teases. your cheeks flame red when you catch sight of the cherry red thong that has managed to get caught in the wheel of your suitcase.

“shut up, i’m helping you.” you grumble, balling up the lace and burying it at the bottom of the case.

“why is it ferrari coloured? something you wanna tell me? do you think charles is… foxy? or is it fred? oh, i bet it’s fred, isn’t it.” he’s laughing now, loud and boisterous, and if it wasn’t for the butterflies erupting in your belly at the sound, you would have throttled him.

“i’ll leave you to bleed out.” you tease back, pointing at the dried up blood across his knuckles.

“of course, i am in urgent need of medical attention!” he exclaims sarcastically, clutching his hand. you roll your eyes.

“you know where the door is.” you stand from the floor, carrying a little square antiseptic wipe with you.

“yeah, i do. feel like staying now, though. i’m just so comfy.”

and with that, he throws himself back on your bed, closing his eyes as he sinks into the mattress.

you stare at him for a second, noticing the way his eyelashes dust the tops of his cheeks, his tanned, thick neck peeks out from in between the undone buttons of his dress shirt. you exhale shakily, moving to sit beside him on the bed.

“give me your hand.” you instruct him, tearing the packet open and unfolding the wipe.

“romantic.” lando snarks. you shove his shoulder in response. he holds his hand out.

“whatever.” you sigh, avoiding eye contact as you run the wipe over his knuckles. you can see how they are already tinged purple, wincing at the idea that it is your fault.

“what is it?” lando asks, noticing.

you don’t respond. this proximity is odd, you can’t quite tell yet if you like it. what you do know is that you certainly don’t know how to handle him now that the alcohol is wearing off and you’re left tending to the wounds of a man that you could have sworn you didn’t like.

“so that’s how it’s gonna be? we’re going back to the silent treatment again?” lando scoffs.

“don’t know what to say.” you mutter, keeping your eyes trained on every line and indent of his knuckles.

“why do you hate me so much?”

“i don’t.”

“yes, you do.” he scoffs.

“i don’t think about you enough to hate you.” you lie. it’s cruel. he winces.

that shuts him up.

“i’m gonna go. thanks for this.” lando waves his hand and you feel a wave of guilt hit.

“no, fuck, i’m sorry.” you apologise, bowing your head. “stay.”

“i’ll stay if you tell me why you hate me.”

“i’ve never hated you, lan. haven’t always particularly liked you but i never, ever hated you.”

“okay.”

that’s all it takes for him to flop back onto the bed. some unexplainable instinct that you loathe has you crawling onto the bed beside him. you wrap your arms around your pillow, watching him watch you.

“i used to have such a big crush on you, you know.” lando says. you stare at him blankly.

“what?”

“yep. i think i was about 15. you were the first girl i ever really liked that way.” he smiles, recalling the memory. “it kinda sucked because i knew you wouldn’t even look at me twice but it’s funny thinking back to that time.”

~ 15

he watches the way her hair gets caught in the breeze as she takes off her helmet. two messy braids are shaken free, and his heart skips a beat or two, or seven, when she turns around with the biggest grin on her face.

she’s just won a race, another one, and he’d be so jealous if it wasn’t her.

he thinks she’s the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen. george and alex go over to her, congratulating her, hugging her. he wishes he could do that. he definitely can’t.

she doesn’t see him, the only times that she does are when they argue, when they push eachother off the track and scream at one another across a gravel trap. the times when she plants her pointed finger in his chest and calls him dirty, the times he gets heated and calls her something he doesn’t mean under his breath. and she always hears him. always. he watches her eyes pool with tears every single time.

he wants her, in a way he’s never wanted anyone before. he’s never felt like this, wonders how he can make it go away. she hates him. she must.

he can never have her, so why even try?

~

“i had no idea you ever felt that way.” you’re quite shocked, really. you knew that you had this intensely charged sexual tension between you now, but you had failed to realise how far back this all went.

mutually, at least.

“i’d say i’ve done a pretty good job of hiding it.” his smile changes slightly. it was now a sad smile, one that conveys disappointment in himself, and that you hated to see. it reminds you of the one you’ve gotten used to seeing on your social media feed after he’d had a shitty race.

you sigh, bracing yourself for what you are about to say.

“you’re not the only one who hid it.” you raise an eyebrow, your face says ‘guilty!’

“no?” lando’s eyes widen at your revelation.

“i think we were 13. you gave me half a cookie to apologise for pushing me off track.” you smile coyly. “it’s kinda sad but 13 year old me died inside.” you laugh.

“so, we’ve both… liked each other.” lando assesses. you nod.

“when did you stop?” you inquire, scanning his face. you take in each detail, each individual freckle, the curve of his lips. he seems closer, all of the sudden, and that’s when you realise you’ve closed the space between you. lando is within reach now, it would have been so, so incredibly easy to shift even closer still; it was like you were in his gravitational field, reeled in by pretty, pretty eyes.

“who said i stopped?”

“oh.” you breathe.

~ 13

he snaps the crumbly biscuit between his fingers, trails towards her awkwardly. he feels bad, feels a strange pang in his chest that he doesn’t recognise.

he finds her around the back of her parents car, arms crossed, eyebrows scrunched, pouting hard. he thinks she’s cute.

“why are you here?” she whines.

“this is for you. i know it doesn’t make up for the race. i didn’t mean to take you out, i swear.”

he sounds panicked, sincere. her tummy turns funny.

he’s holding out a cookie, the children’s equivalent of an olive branch.

her face softens. she accepts it. they bite into their cookies at the same time.

it’s not the worst day in the world anymore.

~

messy kisses and soft whispers lull you to sleep.

his nose bumps yours every time your lips meet, gentle and plush.

you feel delicate in his arms, treasured. his lips press gently to your hairline. he’s different, softer than you’ve seen him since you were teenagers splitting cookies.

it’s the easiest thing in the world to curl into his side, mould together until you’re part of him, and drift off.

-

the heat wakes you up.

you stir, eyes fluttering open, searching for the source of the onslaught of warmth. it clicks quickly, and you realise that you hadn’t dreamt the events of the night before.

lando is in your bed.

lando had protected you.

lando had wanted you since you were stupid kids who didn’t know any better.

he is the heater that had woken you up, and suddenly you don’t care that you’re far too hot. you curl back into his side, head rests on his chest. it rises and falls softly, his heartbeat thrums beneath your ear. you are jealous of how pretty he looks when he’s asleep, relaxed and infatuating. you lose track of time, gazing up at him.

a sharp pain in your side makes you groan. you had fallen asleep in your dress, lando in his jeans and his shirt, and now you’re paying for it, your fingers searching for the zipper that was now digging into your side. your movements draw him out of his slumber, and when you look back at him, he’s watching you, rubbing sleep from his eyes.

“you okay?” lando croaks, his voice deep and sleepy. it sends shockwaves through you.

“mhm. how did you sleep?” you ask, mindlessly running your hand over his jaw like it was the most natural thing in the world. a smile breaks out across his face, eyes fluttering shut once more.

“really fucking well.” he laughs, almost in disbelief.

“yeah, me too.” you smile at him, shy.

“what’s bothering you?”

“well, a human heater woke me up and now this fucking zipper is killing me.” you joke. it’s weird that this doesn’t feel weird.

“i am pretty hot i guess.”

“yeah, yeah.” you roll your eyes and stand from the bed.

lando sits up, resting on his elbows. his eyes follow you as you walk around the room. you take a bottle of water, drinking half of it before passing it to him. his lips wrap around the bottle and you have to turn away, the ache between your legs that you’d been fighting for months rearing it’s irritating head. you clear your throat, composing yourself.

“need to get this dress off.”

lando pulls himself off of the mattress, stalking towards you. you stop in your tracks and he meets you at the foot of the bed. his hands find your cheeks, thumbs smoothing over your skin in little circles, and then kisses you deeper than he did last night.

it’s impossible not to melt into him, hands running over his chest, his shoulders, and finally finding solace tangled in his curls. if someone told you the morning before that you’d wake up in lando’s arms, you would have cackled, urged them to seek medical attention, and probably spat in their face. how things change.

“i think you should keep it on, look so pretty.” lando breathes, staring down at you. you blush hard, leaning into him.

“but i’m uncomfortable.” you grin coyly. and then, a surge of confidence has you whispering: “i’ll let you take it off if you want.”

“let me make you comfortable first.” lando murmurs, dipping his head down until it rests in the crook of your neck. “want me to get you nice and comfortable, baby?” he kisses up your neck.

you cave, finally.

it takes him all of thirty seconds to have you spread out on his face, laying himself down on the mattress and pulling you on top of him so that you’re hovering over his lips. he mouthes at your panties for a second, getting his first taste of you, and then he drags them to the side, clearing a path. his tongue laves over your cunt, groaning as soon as he gets a proper taste.

your dress fans out over your thighs, and lando has disappeared beneath the fabric. you can tell he’s there, though, by the strong hands gripping onto your thighs, the tuft of curls peeking out, and the feeling of his nose bumping your clit as he buries his face deeper and deeper between your folds.

“lando.” you cry, throwing your head back. the straps of your dress are slipping down your arms, skimming your goosebump ridden skin. he just groans into your pussy in response, pulling you impossibly closer to his mouth, backwards and forwards until you’re grinding down on his willing tongue. you reach down blindly, grabbing one of his hands where it rests on your thigh, and your other threads through his hair, gripping tight as you revel in the pleasure.

lando pulls your clit between his teeth, grazing over the bud and you’re jolting, writhing above him. you feel like you’re going to die, heat pricking all over your skin, your tummy tight from the building orgasm. he’s so eager, sliding his entire face through your slippery folds, obscene sounds falling from his lips that ricochet through your quivering body.

tears prick your eyes when you finally let go, slumping forwards from the overwhelming sensation taking over every single nerve. he lifts you off of him, laying you back on the bed as you come down from your high.

“you okay, baby?” he coos, brushing sweat dampened hair from your eyes.

his lips are stained, dark pink and shiny, a mixture of enthusiasm and your slick coating them. lando scans your watery eyes, feral at how fucked out you look all because of him, and tantalisingly licks his lips.

“need you.” you moan, reaching out for him. his shirt is wrinkled where he’d slept in it and your shaky hands find the few buttons that are actually done up. you push the material off of his shoulders, pupils blown wide at the sight of his toned chest, at the feel of smooth, golden skin. you pull him in by the shoulders, swallowing him whole as you kiss him with everything you’ve got left.

lando’s hands find your thighs once more, running his hands over them to push your dress up your hips.

“wanted this for so long.” he whispers into the kiss, pulling away so that he can take the dress off of you. he looks ravenous the more he pushes the fabric up your body.

you feel vulnerable under his intense gaze, watchful eyes taking in every movement you make. you try to pull him back in for another kiss but he resists.

“let me look at you, please?” lando asks. “there you go, baby, let’s get this off, hmm?” he sits you up so that he can get it over your head, and you lay back, bare aside from your panties that he’d left in disarray.

he sucks in a breath, raking his eyes over the curve of your lips, your collarbone, the slope of your breasts. his gaze lingers there for just a second, before continuing further over your belly, the length of your legs. you want to hide away, pull him in so that he can’t look at you like this, or just dive under the duvet and stay there until you need to catch your flight.

“god, you’re so, so fucking beautiful.” he gasps, awestruck. he sounds speechless, and you feel yourself going red again.

“come here.” you whine. “needed you for so long.”

your admission seems to kick him into action, because seconds later, he’s on top of you, fingers grazing the band of your underwear while you fiddle with the button on his jeans.

“gonna be good for me, aren’t you?” lando stares you down, tone sending a shiver down your spine. you nod, batting your eyelashes. “words, my love.”

“yes, lando.” you affirm, arching into him. that’s all he needs to know, kicking his jeans away, boxers too.

“good girl. took care of me so well last night, now ‘m gonna take such good care of you.”

your eyes skim his body, honing in on how hard he is. your hand finds his cock, tentative at first, stroking over it softly. it’s heavy in your hands, red and dripping already. he wants this just as bad as you do. you continue to jerk him off, watching the way his eyes squeeze shut and his lips part, soft pants falling out. a low hum sounds from the back of his throat, and you wet your lips, threading your free hand through his hair.

lando opens his eyes at the sensation, gently batting your hand away. he dips down even closer, resting on one of his forearms. he lines himself up and your legs wrap around him instinctively. slowly, he pushes inside of you, his breath catching in his throat.

“fucking hell.” he groans, deep and guttural, something carnal sending shockwaves through his body. “been dreaming about all the ways i’d get to fuck you.”

your eyes roll back and you go languid in his arms, feeling every inch of him slide against your slick walls.

“want you.” you rasp, clinging to him, your fingernails leaving patterns between his taut shoulder blades as you beg for it.

“you have me, baby.” and then he kisses you, messy and slow, stealing the air from your lungs. you’re dizzy when he pulls away, sitting back slightly to change the angle. you cry out, feeling him even deeper and everything is more sensitive, warm. you roll your hips, meeting his thrusts deliciously, and he chokes out a moan as you clamp around him. “yeah, that’s it. fuck yourself like that for me.” he encourages.

this is all too much, too good. you have whiplash, physically and emotionally, eyes pooling with tears as the man you’d wanted so badly that you hated him for it rocks into you. lando hits the right spot every time he pistons his hips harder, and his nimble fingers slide up your abdomen, applying light pressure to your navel that makes you writhe.

“fucking perfect for me. gorgeous.” lando slurs, entranced by the sight of where you’re joined. he can see just how wet you are and it drives him insane, barrelling into you like a man possessed, drunk on every single way that your body responds to him.

his wandering hand finds your breast, kneading it before he traces your nipple. he watches the way it hardens at his manipulation, wetting his lips. he collapses back on top of you, sucking the bud into his mouth. you’re panting, whining beneath him as his tongue swirls over your chest, switching to the other side. you jolt, a silent scream scratching your throat when he slips his hand between your thighs, working your clit with the pad of his thumb. he’s rutting against you, grinding deeper, faster, uncontrollably.

“come on, baby. you’re so close, so tight for me.” he mutters into your skin. you nod frantically, your words lost on you. he kisses over your collarbone, the base of your throat, until he finds your lips.

“so close.” you sigh.

he stops.

“tell me you’re all mine.” lando growls, his entire demeanour changing. the tone of his voice almost finishes you off but you’re suddenly enraged. you’re too close for him to stop.

“c’mon lando.” you hiss, trying to move your hips but he has you firmly in place.

“need to hear you say it.” his hand slithers over your chest, finding a new home at the base of your throat. it makes you throb, the way his thick fingers wrap around you. slowly, his grip tightens, and you see an opportunity.

you buck your hips hard, whimpering at the sensation, but your plan works and now you hover over him. he’s still buried inside you, and you can feel him pulsing as you steal control.

“for once in your life, honey, shut the fuck up.” you smirk, mischievous in victory.

slowly, you build up your rhythm. he feels bigger like this, deeper, and you almost lose yourself in the small circles you make with your hips.

“knew you’d be like this. you liked giving yourself to me but i just knew you’d need to take back control.” lando teases. his hand is back around your neck, squeezing slowly, and you grind frantically, dizzy for him. “i was right last night, wasn’t i, baby? pretending to be my good girl when really,” he pulls you down so that you’re chest to chest. “you’re just a fucking brat.”

lando holds you close as he fucks up into you, feeling the way you go limp on top of him as the pleasure washes over you like a million electric shocks. you’re crying, tears pooling on his chest, because there is nothing you can do, nothing you want to do, but take it. he’s got you right where he wants you, and you’re loving every fucking second of it.

“yeah, baby, take it how you want it.” lando commands through gritted teeth, and you move your hips in a feeble attempt to match his speed. everything is slippery, everything feels wet and flushed.

the power play, the position, the frenzy he seems to be in as he fucks you, it all has you gushing, spilling all over him. you choke out a sob, shuddering as the elastic band in your belly snaps. lando stops his thrusts, replacing them with small rolls of his hips to help you through your orgasm.

a sharp breath and a string of curses from him give you the strength to muster the last little bits of energy you have left to look up at him. you pull your head up off of his chest just in time to watch him shatter into a million little pieces.

his neck flexes as his head rolls back, sinking into the pillow, his eyes tight. swollen lips part and your name falls from between them like a prayer. you can feel him filling you up, his hands tightening their hold on your hips like he’s scared to let go, like the world will stop if he does.

the world stops anyway, because then you’re looking at each other. really looking at each other.

it only takes a second for you to be drawn in and his hands leave your hips to cup your face. his calloused hands feel your skin, stroking over rosy patches on your cheeks. it’s deathly silent all around you, apart from the breathless pants you share.

swollen lips crash hard into yours and you melt. he’s still buried so deeply inside of you, your hips digging into his, impossibly close. you’re blindly reaching for any part of him you can get your hands on, and his big hands slide down your body until they meet the small of your back. ever so carefully, he flips you onto your back, easing your spent body into the mattress.

lando collapses on top of you, mouthes at your neck for a moment, delicate kisses making your eyes flutter shut. the eye contact almost sends you into cardiac arrest as he pulls out, oh so slowly. tease.

he holds you close in the shower, fingers massaging every part of you. sex and sweat are washed away, almost lovingly. you let the water run for far too long, content in clinging to him. it’s quiet, reflective time for both of you, exactly what it needs to be. you’re both hung up on questions that need to be asked, neither one of you brave enough to take the first steps. you know one thing, and one thing only: something has changed, in a forever kind of way.

your hair is stringy, half dry, and you’re stood in your underwear. your legs are still shaky.

“your flight soon?” lando asks. he’s stood in his boxers on the other side of the room, scrunching the water out of his curls.

“yeah.” your throat feels raw.

“and you’re going back to monaco?” he’s stopped what he’s doing now, staring at you. you can see the cogs turning behind his eyes.

you nod.

“fancy a sleepover?” he grins, boyish and careless. your heart falls to your feet.

you’re giggling when he sweeps you into his arms and kisses you into the freshly made bed. the sheets are on the floor by the time you finally remember you have a flight to catch.

you’re his now, you realise. he’s too beautiful for his own damn good.

-

“baby?” you hear lando call from his bedroom. you make out the faint sound of his footsteps making their way in your direction. he appears before you can even answer him, and he’s smiling softly at the sight of you bundled up in a blanket, sprawled across his couch.

“what is it?” you ask. the next thing you know he’s on top of you, peppering kisses over every single inch of skin he can get to on your face. “hey, get off, muppet.” you whine playfully, ruffling his hair.

“do you know how much i love having you here?” he murmurs. it’s endearing as fuck and you fight a foolish, dopey grin.

“you’ve mentioned once or twice…” you’ve been here since your flight touched down a week ago. you haven’t even been home to get clothes, not that you needed them in his company.

“we might have a teeny, tiny issue.” he squints, pulling a face.

“and what’s that?” you ask, your voice measuring equal parts cautious and amused.

“so, alex called…”

“oh, shit.”

“we have to go to dinner tonight.”

“we have to?”

“he’s suspicious as fuck. you do realise they’ve been plotting for us to happen for years,” you roll your eyes as if you say duh. “and also, you’ve been in monaco for a week and haven’t seen him once. oh, and also, the last time we saw them, we were running away from a fucking crime scene.” lando smiles sarcastically, and you sigh, defeated.

before you can reply, your phone is ringing somewhere beside you. you root around in your blanket searching for it and when you find it:

“son of a bitch.” you exclaim, showing lando the caller ID. alex is one persistent motherfucker.

“hey girl.” alex singsongs down the phone before you can even say hello.

“hello to you too.” you can hear the fear in your own voice.

“dinner. tonight. although, i’m sure lando already told you.” alex teases.

“why would lando have told me? what?” you choke. lando slaps his hand over his face. your voice has gone up several octaves. not suspicious at all.

“so, you’re at home? you haven’t been at his place since last week?” the playful interrogation begins.

“why would i be with lando?” you try and feign disgust at the implication. it does not work.

“because you hate fucked after he beat up that perv? i have to say, i didn’t think he had it in him but he’s been in love with you since he was like, ten, so, you know-”

“bye alex.”’

“you’re not denying it-“

“bye alex!”

you’re flaming red when you throw the phone to the other end of the sofa. lando, as on brand as ever, is cackling into a pillow.

“he is such a fucking shit stirrer.” you bury your face in your hands, slumping back into the fuzzy cushions.

“well, he’s right about one thing.” lando trails off. suddenly he’s looking anywhere but you and you see him gulp, hard, swallowing his words, like he’s too afraid to bare his soul.

“huh?” you ask gently, sitting up to reach out for him. “what’s wrong?”

“we need to get ready for dinner. that’s what he’s right about.” lando says, standing from the sofa and walking towards his room. you’re suspicious, watching him go with furrowed eyebrows.

-

“lando, behave! you’re the one making me go to this dinner.” you squeal, batting his restless hands away.

you’ve made it as far as the elevator before he pounces on you, caging you in against the metal walls.

“but you look so good, can’t help myself.” he mutters between kisses on your neck, pressing himself even further into you.

the hand that finds it’s way between your legs, exploring beyond the hem of your skirt, is the one that makes you press the button for his floor. why have plans when you can have sex?

he gets through the door to his apartment at lighting speed and carries you all the way to his bed.

when you’re sweating and breathless a good hour later, half of the bedding on the floor with your clothes, you realise you never cancelled your plans.

lando is drawing shapes into the bare skin of your arm, kissing over your shoulder as he does so. his eyes are dropping from all of the over-exertion and you want to count each and every freckle on his face while he falls asleep. he’s cute like this, soft and yours.

and idea comes to your mind, and as if he can see the lightbulb, lando half raises an eyebrow at you. you giggle, somewhat evilly perhaps, and scramble for your phone on the beside table.

“what’re you doing?” lando groans, pouting as his outstretched arms try to find you.

“getting even.” you state.

with the phone in your clutches, you roll back over towards him, holding the camera above you both. he hears the shutter sound as you snap the picture, and peers closer to see the screen. when he sees the groupchat open, he quickly understands what you’re plotting.

“may i?” you ask for his consent.

“are you kidding? go for it. that’ll shut them up.” he laughs sleepily, muttering something about how this is the most lando thing you’ve ever done

FROM: you

TO: the groupchat

1 image attached

couldn’t make dinner. something came up xx

“alex always thinks he’s right, this’ll teach him for being such a little shit.” you flop back into bed even more satisfied than you were before.

you hear lando inhale shakily beside you.

“he is right sometimes you know.” he repeats his earlier words.

you hold your breath. his eyes say so many things that are too delicate to be spoken yet.

“like… like what he said on the phone?” your voice quivers with anticipation, fear. your heart is thunderous, hammering away like it wants to escape the clutches of its cage.

“yeah. i-“ he stops himself. you don’t need him to finish, you know which two words follow. they can follow in good time, you both know it.

“me too, lando.” you coo.

he’s beaming, eyes half shut. you watch as he falls asleep, the both of you ignoring the way your phones are vibrating so aggressively that they might buzz their way off of the night stand. you lose count of his freckles, but it doesn’t matter.

you’ll have plenty of time to figure it out.

-

let me know what you think :D

-

taglist

@boysthatgovroomvroom @thegirlinthefandoms @welld0nebaku @mcmuppet @japanesekel @vinvantae @ggaslyp1 @dr3lover @smiithys  @rachstash @infinitebells @fizzpopsnap101 @gaily19 @icecoldtires @mysticalnightenthusiast @thatchickwiththecamera @oyesmendes @disneydaydreameralways @canyouseethesainz @ferrarifwendvale @fcbformulaeri @tony-stank3 @maih23 @nokiaholland @soleilgrec @carolineworld @anthonykatebridgerton @allywthsr @iamasimpingh0e @ophcelia @lovelynikol16 @coffeehurricanes @jennx03 @blueflorals @lqvesoph @sidcrosbyspuck @better-dead-than-smeg @buendiabebeta @pjofics @kovalcin @wintergilmore3 @for-writing-shit @youdontknowmeshh @im-an-overthinker @jule239 @darleneslane @jazzy722 @weasleyswizarding-wheezes @therealone4r @pleasecallmeunhinged @theonlyadrienne @spideylovin

(i ran out of tags omg? whoops) lemme know if you wanna be added or removed <3

[0asisbliss]

How HXH characters react to you cooking for them

Characters included: Chrollo, Kurapika, Pakunoda, Feitan, Illumi, Shalnark.

A/n: This has been sitting in my drafts for a while..😭

Chrollo:

He's fairly surprised, but then he isn't that's what's just expected of you. I mean you love him and you care for him, and you’re just showing that by doing this small simple act.

•May go over and give you small faint kisses on your cheek.

•Asks if you need help with anything.

•Loves it when you cook his favorite foods

•Will steal buy those cute aprons that say corny shit like “Guess who’s cooking?” Or, “Kiss the cook.” He will. Multiple times.

•If you like cooking dishes specifically from your culture he would looove it. Giving you compliments like “Honey it smells amazing”, “Whatever your cooking I’d like to try it because it looks good.”.

•Likes when you bring the food to him too. He’s patiently waiting for you to finish, and you sit two plates down at the dinner table.

•Chrollo has always liked when you two would sit down and chat about how your days went, while eating some type of delicious meal. It’s even better when you cook it.

•Tries to be helpful, but will listen if you tell him you’ve got it.

Kurapika:

He already introduced you to his love of seeing you cooking. He never verbally told this though. You found out from him when he came home one day after work to see you in the kitchen stirring up a pot of pasta. You didn’t notice he was home until he was standing beside you staring at you in awe.

•When you noticed that he likes seeing you cook when his eyes sparkled the minute they laid on you once he entered your shared home.

•Tries to help you by chopping up vegetables, or washing meats.

•He helps you season the meats also.

•Or he could just stand behind you and hug your waist while you fry up some meat.

Feitan:

•Clingy. He doesn’t try to be though he just stands there behind you and watches as your stir something in a pot.

•Sometimes you think it’s because he thinks you’re going to poison him. You even asked him.

“Fei?”

“….Yes..”

“Do you really think I’m going to poison you?”

“….”

•He did nothing but stare at you, but that was enough of an answer that you needed.

•Man is this man’s chop game astonishing. You give him 3 cucumbers and he has them all chopped up in 3 seconds. Maybe all of that killing has its benefits.

•Will just stand there beside you and watch like a little kid.

•Will ask to help every now and then. When understand if you say no.

Shalanark:

Another clingy one. Hugs your waist from behind while he watches you look for seasonings in your cabinet. He thinks it’s cute when you cook for him. He starts to steal buy you cooking supplies, aprons, and ingredients for you to cook more for him.

•He’ll tell you some of his favorite dishes, and constantly compliment your cooking.

•Never to critical. He’ll be honest with you when you ask him about the food. He’ll tell you what went wrong, and right.

•Loves helping you. Will do it either if you ask him or not.

•He always say thank you every time you set the plate down on the table. He likes the little talks you two have while you eat dinner.

•Will listen to you ramble about your day.

Pakunoda:

Thinks it’s cute when your in the kitchen cooking for her. Will go grocery shopping with you once you pick up the ingredients. Giving you advise on higher quality brands, and other food items.

•She thinks you might hurt yourself while cutting so she cuts everything for you.

•Pakunoda thinks that you both should cook for each other once she sees you cooking for her, so you guys end up taking turns in cooking and watching.

•She finds different ways to help you out. If she’s not cutting something she’s seasoning something. If she’s not seasoning something she could be measuring some type of liquid.

•She’s a foodie. She’ll love anything you cook her. Especially if you cook your cultural foods! (Doesn’t matter where your from)

•Everytime you cook for her she’ll say thank then begin to eat. (She’s so sweet💓)

Illumi:

He usually has his butlers cook for him, but once you ask him to come over as a date he’s hooked. He’ll ask you so many questions. He won’t sit down and watch he’ll stand over you to see exactly what you’re doing. It’s not as cute as when feitan may stand beside you he just stares, and not even blinking.

•He’ll ask questions the whole time.

•He’s also another one that’s good at chopping things.

•He might not look like it but he has a major sweet tooth!

•He likes it when you bake for him just as much when you cook dinner for him.

•Will tell what he likes about the dish at dinner.

•He may never admit it, but he likes it when you invite him over to cook for him.

•He likes the way you smile every time he says something good about the way it tastes.

“Illumi?”

“Yes darling? Is there something wrong?”

“So? Uhm.. how does it taste?”

“…I like it. Actually it tastes great. You’ve did a good job.”

•He may even pat your head once he gets up, and leaves

That’s it for today lovelies! Have a great day, and remember to drink enough water, eat.



[starsinthesky5]

the one || joe burrow x reader

description: once he found the one, he never planned on letting go

a/n: this is part 2 of down bad!!! thank you to the anon that wanted to see a part 2 and since she literally gave me the idea for a good chunk of this fic, a special shoutout to @joeys-babe! part 3 will be out soon!

also, i just wanted to say do the things that make you happy and not care about what anyone else says (as our boy has stated a few times). don’t let anyone’s opinions or words dictate what you can and can’t do, especially if they do not know you. do what makes you happy, ALWAYS! that has lowkey been my life motto for the longest time and those are my thoughts as I continue to write and enjoy my time on this app 💗 

okay back to the fic, this takes 2 years after the first part! so you and joe have been together for 2.5 years going on to 3 by now!

warnings: SMUT, language 

word count: 20 k

————————————————————

“Fuck, you feel too good, baby,” you moaned as you closed your eyes and ran your nails along Joe’s muscular back, your pleasure rapidly building inside your sore body. 

“That’s it…that’s it, baby,” Joe moaned. “You’re doing so good,”. 

You and Joe had been wrapped up in bed for over an hour this evening, enjoying all this extra free time you two had together since it was off-season for Joe. You two were planning on spending the evening going through your shared closet and getting rid of things you didn’t need or use anymore, but that only lasted for about 10 minutes since Joe found a pair of new skimpy red lace panties you bought to surprise him later in the week. You could practically see the lust in his eyes as he pulled you right back to bed and you could feel it too because of the way he was going about it. 

“I’m gonna cum again,” you whined while opening your eyes and seeing Joe’s incredibly dark blue eyes filled with raw desire, his hand firmly placed on your waist as he rammed into your core, sending your body further up the bed and a prominent indent being visible in your lower belly because of him. You felt your orgasm building again for the 3rd time this evening and you were practically floating at this point. Joe's stamina was never to be questioned, but he was surprised that you could still keep going even after being so wrung out. 

“Shit..me too,” Joe panted as he dropped his head to the crook of your neck. “Fuck, you look so pretty under me like this…I can’t get enough of you, baby,” he moaned into your ear as he finished the sentence with a nip to your neck. He continued to moan and whimper in your ear, the sounds coming from his mouth literally making you lose all control and innocence. 

“J- Joe,” you whimpered as your legs started to shake, your eyes once again seeing stars. “Fuck..I need you harder,”.  

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he groaned as he felt your walls start to convulse around his thick shaft, your nails clawing at his back which was sure to leave a few red marks you’d take care of later. He started pounding into you with more intensity, making your moans come out in short gasps. 

“Baby, I-,” you hissed before you felt Joe crash his lips against yours, silencing your sounds of pleasure as he moved one of his hands down to your bundle of nerves. You placed a hand into his hair–lightly scratching his scalp in a way you knew he loved–and pulled him closer while his thumb fondled your aching clit. 

A few seconds later, you pulled away from his lips mid-kiss because you felt the imaginary band in your belly snap hard and another wave of pleasure washing over your tired body. “Ah, Joe,” you screamed for maybe the 100th time in the past hour. 

You felt your release soaking both of your lower halves as he kept pounding into your core, his rapid pace not slowing down even though you were experiencing the aftershocks of your orgasm and he was making it even more intense. 

“Joe…I C- Can’t…,” you whispered, your eyes screwing shut again as you arched up into him.

“I’ve got you, baby,” he whispered into your ear, his gentle hand sliding along your thigh and down to your calf as he pressed a few loving kisses to your flushed cheeks. A few seconds later, you heard him let out a soft grunt as he emptied himself inside of you, his warm cum coating your walls for the second time tonight yet the feeling was still so pleasing and fresh. 

After giving himself a few moments to regroup, he gently pulled out of you and crashed down right next to you on the bed, both of your bodies incredibly sweaty and covered in body fluids but still stuck to each other like glue. 

“That was hotttt,” Joe smiled as he pulled you into his chest and pulled a blanket over both your bodies after he noticed you shivering a bit because of the cold air hitting you. 

“Very. I don’t think I’ll be able to move for at least another hour,” you laughed as you kissed his chin. “I don’t know what we were thinking when we said we’d be productive this evening,”.

“I mean, we were pretty productive I would say,” Joe smirked. “If the task at hand was baby-making then we were definitely productive,”.

“Joe!” you shrieked, slapping his chest as he continued to laugh above you. 

“Kidding,” he added after he pressed a kiss to your forehead. “We can be productive another day. We deserve to have fun and do our thing without worrying about anything,”.

“Won’t argue with you about that one,” you breathed out while closing your eyes and snuggling up to him, his arm wrapping comfortably around you as you both just enjoy each other’s warmth. 

You both stayed like this for a little while longer, Joe tracing invisible shapes onto the soft skin of your back while you played with the wristbands on his other wrist, neither of you saying anything to the other.

Only when Joe spoke up.

“Soooo, earlier I may have booked us a trip to NYC for tomorrow night,” he so casually said to you, your head immediately lifting up from his chest as you were now face to face.

“What?” you asked, incredibly confused and surprised by what he said.

“Yeah,” he smiled at you while moving the falling hair out of your eyes. “We could use a little trip,”.

“To New York,” you said while raising an eyebrow. 

“Yes, to New York,” he slowly nodded.

“Any reason in particular? You didn’t even ask me about it like you usually do before planning a trip,” you said, slightly suspicious about the whole thing. Why did he want to go to New York for vacation out of all places? He could’ve picked Florida, Hawaii, or literally anywhere else to escape the coldish March weather. 

“Nope, no reason at all,” he lied while flashing you a smile.

Oh, there was a reason that’s for sure. Joe planned this spur-of-the-moment New York trip because he was going to propose to you this week, and you had no idea. He had known that you’d be his forever from the first time he laid his eyes on you, and your first conversation sealed the deal. From then on, every kiss, every date, every ‘I love you’, and every moment you spent together just made that ever more clear. Although you two hadn’t been together for a super long time, he knew that nothing could compare to the love you two shared–this was it. This is what many people spent years upon years searching for, some even being unable to find this type of connection. He was lucky enough to have found it so quickly and wasn’t planning on letting go of something so rare and priceless. You were the one for him and he had to make it official. 

He spent countless days trying to figure out when and where to do it since he had the ring made and in his safe for about a month and a half; he was growing restless by the minute because every idea he had was cliché or generic. He also hadn’t discussed this with any friends or family yet because he wanted this special moment to just be for you two, so he was completely on his own. He didn’t know what to do until yesterday, a photo popped up in his memories from your trip to New York–2 years ago to be specific–at your best friend Sophia’s Wedding. 

And that’s when it hit him.

This was the same place where Joe first mentioned your future together. 

This was the same place where he told you that he was going to marry you.

This is the same place where Joe was now going to propose to you and really make you the one. It all was going to come full circle. 

“I just thought to surprise you with the trip. I know you usually do the majority of the planning and stuff whenever we go somewhere but I wanted you to take the backseat this time,” he added.

“Okay,” you nodded. “But tomorrow night? What’s the rush?”.

The rush was that he physically could not wait any longer to put that beautiful ring on your finger and call you his fiancé. 

“No rush,” he lied again. “It’s just because we don’t have anything really going on this week so why wait,”.

You thought over it for a few seconds and felt that it would be nice to get away for a little bit and spend some time together outside of Ohio, and New York was one of your favorite spots to visit. And since Joe was planning it all, you could sit back and relax. You needed a break from life for a second and this was exactly what you craved. “I guess,” you giggled as you moved his tousled curls out of his eyes. 

“So, you down?” he asked, searching your tired eyes for a ‘yes’.

“You know I’m down for anything as long as I’m with you,” you lazily smiled before you leaned down to press a sweet kiss to his swollen lips. 

“I love you,” Joe smiled against your lips, your loving eyes staring deeply into his which were mirroring yours. It was finally going to happen, he was finally going to make you his forever. 

“I love you more,” you said while nuzzling your nose against his, his arms wrapping around your waist and his warm body cuddling you again. “I’m so excited,” you giggled as he smothered you with kisses. 

“Me too,” he grinned, internally laughing at how you had 0 idea how excited he really was. He had never been this excited to do something in his life. 

The Next Night - On the plane 

“I always love a good night flight,” you smiled as you got comfy in your seat after you and Joe shared a quick meal while the plane was taking off. 

“And that’s exactly why I called the Private Jet for this specific time,” he grinned as he brought over your wine glass and sat down next to you. 

“Thaank you,” you smiled as you took the glass from him, taking a small sip before handing it to him so he could take one as well. “Something about night flights is just so much more comforting and relaxing,”. 

“Mhm,” he nodded before swallowing the lush wine. “New York looks even better at night so I figured you’d like seeing the city from up here before we go further out and the lights are gone,”.

“Further out?” you asked as you turned your neck to look at him. “Are we not staying in the city?”. 

“Nope,” he grinned. “I got us an Airbnb in Winchester,”.

“...Winchester?” you asked, your brain struggling to remember why that sounded so familiar. You stayed quiet for a few seconds as you tried to recall where you’d heard that from, and Joe stayed quiet so you could figure it out on your own.“Wait, isn’t that the little town where Sophia got married?”.

“Yeah,” he laughed. “I remember you saying how much you liked it out there over the city because it was quieter and simpler,”.

“It’s soooo pretty,” you smiled as you closed your eyes and remembered how beautiful the town looked the last time you visited it. “It’s right by the lake, has tons of cute little shops but also all the luxury ones like the city does, and the energy is so romantic. Like rom-com romantic,” you blushed.

“Romantic?” Joe raised an eyebrow and asked. 

“Mhmmm,” you grinned while leaning your head on his shoulder. “Like the vibe is just so-,”.

“Romantic?” he smiled while finishing your sentence. 

“Yeah,” you shyly said. “I don’t know how to put it into words but it’s just so perfect and lovey. No wonder Sophia and Steven chose it as their wedding spot,”. 

“Mhm,” he hummed and hid his extremely big smile by wiping his mouth, trying very hard to not refer to it as your proposal spot. 

“Thanks for doing this, Joe,” you smiled up at him. “I feel like I needed this more than I thought,”.

“Of course, baby,” he said while kissing the side of your head and wrapping an arm around your shoulder. “It’s just you and me, just as it should be. No distractions, no outside noise, and definitely nothing around that can ruin this for us,”. 

“Our own little bubble of love. I loveeee it,” you said while leaning into him.

“Good, because I plan on staying in this bubble till I die,” he mumbled under his breath. 

“Hm?” you said because you heard him murmur something but couldn’t quite make it out. 

“Nothing,” he quickly shook his head and brushed off, his cheeks turning a little red since you almost heard what he said. You were about to say something because he was acting a little weird but before you could, he spoke up again. “I um..Do you remember our little yearly game challenge,” he quickly changed the topic so that you wouldn’t dig at the little moment that you just had.

“Listen, I know I lost last time, like really badly lost, but you don’t have to rub it in my face,” you scowled.

“I’m not rubbing it in your face, I just wanted to remind you that since I won, you have to do whatever I say for an entire day,” he smirked, this little condition a small part of tomorrow’s proposal plan. 

“Ugh, don’t remind me,” you groaned while stuffing your face in your hands. 

“By the way, I’m cashing in my ticket tomorrow so be prepared to do whatever I say,” he whispered in your ear. 

“Why tomorrow? We’re on vacation,” you groaned again. “I swear to god if you have me do some stupid shit-,”.

“Nothing stupid, I promise,” he grinned. “You’ll have fun and I’ll make it enjoyable,”.

“This game challenge was a bad idea. You always win and have too much power over me for 24 hours,” you shook your head. 

“Well, from what I remember, right now we’re pretty neck and neck,” he shrugged. “If you wanted to catch up, now is probably your chance. Unless, of course, you’re too lazy,” he teased. 

If there was one thing you hated being called, it was lazy. You never backed down from anything because you were too ‘lazy’ and Joe knew that which made this even more fun because he knew that being called ‘lazy’ woke something up inside of you. He found your competitive nature incredibly endearing, and he got to see it pretty early on in your relationship. He loved that he had someone who matched his competitive side, someone who didn’t mind silly shit-talking and was as goal-oriented as he was. 

You stared at him for a few moments, a fire building behind your eyes before you got up from your seat, “Where’s the Switch,” you grumbled while scrunching up your nose. 

“That’s my girl,” he grinned before he got up from his seat, dropped a loving kiss on your red cheeks, and grabbed his bag. You couldn’t help but smile even though you were getting your determined game face on, his sweet and soft attitude towards you always made you melt into a puddle of goo. 

The Next Day 

“Joe, where are we going?” you asked for the 3rd time as you looked over at him, but couldn’t see because of the blindfold around your eyes.

“It’s a secret, babe. You and your sexy self need to be patient” he grinned as he looked over at you, taking in how gorgeous you looked in the very expensive outfit he bought for you earlier. You both were doing some shopping earlier and Joe came in intending to find something for you to wear during the proposal but lied and said it was for tonight’s special dinner so you wouldn’t ask questions. He picked out a very gorgeous but very expensive vintage floral dress for you to wear, a matching pair of vintage Prada heels with a matching handbag, and even bought you another gold necklace from the jewelers next door to tie it all together. You refused to let him spend this much money on you, but he reminded you that you had to do anything he asked for 24 hours, so you had to comply with his wishes of buying you all this. 

After shopping your lives away, he made you go to the Spa with him. You were very confused as to why he made you both go to the Spa since that was never Joe’s scene, but this was his way of making you get a fresh set of nails and a nice facial treatment without it being too suspicious. Since this New York trip was super last minute, you didn’t have any time to get anything done and he knew that you’d be on his ass if you took engagement photos with a bad manicure and slightly dull skin, so he made sure you got everything done. You were going to go with light blue nails, but once again you had to do everything he said, and Joe wanted you to get white chrome nails. You didn’t ask why he wanted that specific color because you were too busy laughing at how silly he looked with a green mud mask on, but it was because it was the perfect color to mesh with the engagement ring he had made for you. 

Then once you got everything wrapped up at the Spa, you went back to the Air BnB and got ready for the ‘dinner’ Joe was taking you to. You were finishing your makeup before you felt Joe come up behind you in his baby blue sweater, wrapping his arms around you, swaying you from side to side, telling you how beautiful you looked. You spent a few moments like this, whispering little words of love to each other and passing typical flirtatious comments before Joe pulled out a blindfold from his pocket. 

“Why the blindfold?” you furrowed your eyebrows and asked. “You trying to kidnap me or something?” you joked. 

“Do you trust me?” he asked with a smile.

“Of course, I trust you, my to-be kidnapper,” you giggled as you leaned back into his arms. 

“Then let me put it on,” he whispered in your ear while running his hand along your arm, your body heating up from his electric touch. 

“Why?” you breathed out, his hand moving up to cup your shoulder, the pad of his thumb lightly brushing against the nape of your neck.

“It’s a surprise. Can’t say,” he smiled as he opened up the blindfold and met your eyes in the mirror, looking for some sort of response. You gave him a small nod and let him wrap the blindfold around your eyes. You didn’t really have a choice because you had to do whatever he said but you also didn’t ask too many questions, mostly because he wouldn’t answer any of them but also because you enjoyed a good surprise. 

“I know it’s a secret but I’m getting impatient,” you frowned as you snapped back to the present. You did enjoy a good surprise, but the anticipation was killing you. “You got me all dressed up and even took me to the Spa–which might I add–is the least Joe Burrow-like activity on the planet, and I’m a little suspicious right now truth be told,”.

“Am I not allowed to pamper my fian-..girlfriend?” Joe said, his eyes widening at the fact that he almost called you his fiancé. 

“You are,” you laughed, Joe letting out a relieved breath because it sounded like you didn’t hear him slip up. “I just thought you’d have me do other stuff and not stuff that was catered to me since I have to do whatever you say for the whole day,”

“Other stuff? Like what?” he snickered as he looked out onto the road, the Wedding Venue where Sophia got married and where Joe was proposing getting closer and closer. 

“Hmm, I don’t know. Maybe giving you super sloppy world-class head or making you pumpkin pie while only wearing an apron and no clothes underneath,” you chuckled.

“Well, the day isn’t over yet,” he smirked. “Maybe I’ll ask for those two later tonight,”.

“Now that sounds more like you,” you laughed. “But seriously, where are you taking me that requires a blindfold,”.

“You’ll see, we’re almost there,” he smiled, his heart rate picking up once he realized that this was really happening and wasn’t just a dream. 

A few minutes later, you had made it to the Winchester Country Club. Joe had rented out the entire event space for the day so that you two could have all the privacy you needed for this special and intimate moment. He had the staff set up the same ballroom where Sophia had her reception–and where he first mentioned your future together–with various candles and flowers lining the dance floor while there were rose petals scattered around in the middle. He even made sure that they hooked up the sound system so that he could play a special song while all of this was going down. It was picture-perfect, all of it. He was going to make you the one where it all really started for you both, where you first got a taste of what the years to come would be like. 

Joe turned the car off and took a few deep breaths to calm his growing nerves before looking over at your clueless yet adorable face, a big smile on it as you unbuckled your seat belt and turned to face him. 

“Are we here?” you eagerly asked as you attempted to find his forearm but couldn’t see so you were doing a bad job.

“We are,” he smiled while grabbing your hand and giving it a gentle squeeze. 

“So I can take this off?” you asked as you reached to untie the blindfold.

“No!” Joe quickly moved your hand down and said. “I need you to keep it on for a bit longer,”. 

“You’re so kidnapping me,” you giggled. 

“Would it be so bad though?” he teased as he opened his door and slid out of his seat, quickly closing it and jogging over to your side to let you out and finish your conversation.

“Not really,” you laughed as he opened your door and you struggled to find where he was standing since you couldn’t see a thing. “I would have the sexiest kidnapper in the world and probably receive the best treatment a hostage could get,”. 

“Exactly,” he shrugged as he grabbed your hand and carefully helped you out of the car. Being blindfolded was not easy because you were either one step away from falling on your face or one step away from going the wrong way. He made sure you got down carefully and closed your door for you before taking another deep breath and grabbing your hand. “You trust me, right?” he asked again, his nerves settling in now. 

“Where was this coming from?” you thought to yourself. This was now the second time he asked you this and it was adding to your suspicion along with the blindfold, expensive outfit, and spa treatments, that something was up. 

“More than anyone in the world,” you smiled as you pulled his hand up and pressed a soft kiss to it. 

“Okay,” he sighed. “Let’s go,” he said while leading you inside hand in hand. You let Joe lead you to what felt like a building of some sort, the whiff of warm air confirming that you weren’t outside anymore. 

You were walking for a little bit and felt that you were turning corners and entering other rooms. A few moments later, you stopped walking and you heard a few noises that sounded like a door opening, and then you were walking again.

You heard the door close behind you and Joe let go of your hand, his eyes scanning the room as he took in the fairytale-like set up which was just as he imagined. “Wow,” he mumbled to himself before he looked down at you, his heart rate picking up and his palms getting sweaty. 

“Come on, Joe. You got this. She loves you and she’s going to say yes,” Joe thought to himself, giving himself a mental pep talk. 

This was it. 

“You gonna let me see now or is there something else?” you laughed as you continued to look forward. Joe didn’t say anything in response, instead, he just untied the blindfold around your eyes and slipped the silky band off. 

Your eyes slowly adjusted to the dimly lit room, your heart stopping as you looked around and saw that you were standing at the foot of a ballroom floor that was lined with lit candles and flowers, a plethora of rose petals scattered across the middle. “Joe..where are we?” you said, your voice just short of a whisper as you looked up at him, taking note of his crinkled eyes and charming smile.

“The Country Club,” he said while he reached into his pocket and tapped the play button. A few seconds later, the starting tune of “Can’t Help Falling In Love” by Elvis Presley filled the ballroom. 

“Why are we-,” you began to say before he grabbed your hand and led you out to the middle of the dance floor.

“Dance with me first,” he said as he stopped you both in the center and placed his hands on your waist. “This is our song, it would be a shame to pass up on a chance to dance to it,” he said while pulling you closer to him.

“That is true,” you agreed while looping your arms around his neck, Joe began to sway you both back and forth while looking deeply into your soft eyes. “Whatever this is, I already love you for it,” you said while threading your fingers through his hair. 

“That’s really good to hear,” he smiled, as you placed your cheek against his chest and melted into him. Joe couldn’t believe that this was happening, he was just a few moments away from one of the most important moments in his life. He was a little nervous, to say the least, but he knew that you loved him more than anything in the world and there was a higher chance you would say ‘yes’ than ‘no’. You wanted this just as much as he did and if you didn’t, then you would show it. 

You spent a few quiet moments dancing around to the song that you both held incredibly close to your heart before Joe ended the dance by giving you a little twirl and pulling you right back into him after, a little gasp leaving your lips because of the strong movement from him.

“I can’t help falling in love with you,” he said, his face just inches from yours. “And that’s why I have to do this,”. 

“Do what?” you giggled.

“Do you know where we are right now?” Joe asked as he moved his hands from your waist to entwine your fingers, holding your hands as he started his little speech. 

“The Country Club,” you nodded, Joe staying quiet as he expected a more specific answer. “…The place where Sophia got married,” you added as you looked around and recognized the familiar surroundings. 

“Mhm,” he nodded, taking another deep breath to compose himself.

“Joe, why are we here?” you asked again, a little more serious this time as you noticed his tense body and felt his slightly sweaty palms. 

“Do you remember what we talked about at the Wedding? Specifically what we talked about on this dance floor while we danced to the same song?”.

Of course, you remembered what you talked about that night, you couldn’t forget it even if you tried. It was the first time he mentioned your future together, as more than just boyfriend/girlfriend. 

“Yeah,” you swallowed. “I do,” you said as you felt a warm feeling fill your body. 

“I wanted to bring you back here for that specific reason,” he began to say. “This was the first place where I told you how I felt about our future together. Where I told you I wanted to marry you. This was where I had to do this,”.

“Holy. Shit.” you thought to yourself. “Was he actually about to do this?”. 

“Y/N, I love you more than words can describe. These past two years have literally been the best years of my life because of you. You lit my world on fire when you first walked in, and from the first moment I saw you, I was already so down bad for you,”. 

Flashback to when you first met - Offseason 2.5 years ago 

“Y/N, we need you! He’s here,” your boss yelled as you were prepping the dressing room.

“Coming!” you yelled back as you finished setting up the room with snacks and the wardrobe for the shoot. This was just another part of your job working in PR–setting up the room for brand shoots for your guests. 

You looked everything over again to make sure that nothing was lacking, which obviously it wasn’t because you were amazing at your job. “I’m too good,” you grinned to yourself as you quickly turned around on your heels and walked out to the main area. 

Joe was talking to a few of the staff for the shoot today before he heard your boss speak up. “Ah, there she is,” he said while throwing his hands up. “Our miracle worker!”.

“I’m flattered,” you laughed as you walked over to everyone, Joe’s eyes darting toward the adorable laugh that echoed throughout the room. 

The first time Joe looked at you, it felt like the world shifted, just enough to make everything around him blur into the background. When you walked into the room, your presence commanded attention without even trying and the air around you shimmered with something magical. His heart skipped a beat, caught off guard by the sudden pull he felt toward you. 

His eyes met yours for a brief, electrifying moment, and in that instant, it was like a spell had been cast over him. All he could focus on was you, your smile, the way you moved with effortless grace and the way you lit up the entire room. It wasn’t just your beauty that captivated Joe; it was something deeper, something that resonated with his soul. 

The way you laughed and smiled, the way your hair bounced around while you moved, the way you just seemed so utterly yourself–it was all so enchanting. It didn’t take him long to realize that he didn’t want to break free from whatever spell you had unknowingly cast on him. He was completely and utterly mesmerized by you, and you were all he wanted to think about. 

“I’m Y/N,” you said to him, breaking him free from the trance he was in. 

He looked down and saw that you were now standing in front of him, his heart skipping another beat because of how close you were to him. “I’m- I’m Joe,” he nervously said.

“Oh, I know,” you smirked. “You’re pretty well known to say the least,”. 

“Y/N will be your best friend today, Joe. She’ll help you get ready, answer any questions, and basically be stuck by your side while we film today,”.

“I’m a lucky guy,” Joe laughed while rubbing his neck. 

“That you are,” you chimed in. “Follow me, I’ll show you your room for today,” you smiled as you turned around, your smile dropping once he couldn’t see your face anymore.

“Why was he looking at me like that?” you thought to yourself, his heated gaze incredibly noticeable. His beautiful blue eyes were stuck on you the entire time and that made a cloud of butterflies appear in your stomach. You shook your head and snapped out of it, “Focus, Y/N. That’s Joe Burrow. He probably looks at every girl that way for this exact reason–he likes to see them fawn over him,”.

“So, this is basically your house for today,” you awkwardly joked as you led him into the glamorous room. 

“Wow,” he said as his eyes scanned over everything. “And this was all done by you?”.

“Mhm,” you nodded while closing the door behind you. “Also, after the shoot, you can keep whatever you want in this room. Except for the furniture obviously, but the clothes, snacks, and accessories are all yours,”. 

“What about you? Do I get to keep you too?” he looked over at you with a cheeky grin and said. 

“Sorry, I’m off limits,” you winked.  

“Damn, that sucks because I think out of everything in this room, you’re the most appealing,” he flirted. 

You raised an eyebrow, amused at his boldness. “You’re trouble,” you laughed.

“Are you gonna arrest me?” he smirked while raising his hands. 

“We’ll see. I’ll give you the rest of the day before I make a decision,” you said as you felt yourself getting lost in his captivating baby-blue eyes. Something about his eyes was pulling you in, it was as if you wanted to get to know what was behind them and he was going to let you. 

“I’m gonna go back out there and look over the first set of shots we’re doing of you. The stylist and hair/makeup person should be coming in a few minutes,” you said as you felt his heated gaze traveling over your body, your breath hitching in your throat when you saw him lean in close to you, his arm brushing against yours. 

He reached to the side of you, twisting the doorknob and opening the door for you, “Thank you,” he whispered into your ear before pulling back and meeting your eyes again, seeing a spark behind them that you were trying to hide; but why were you trying to hide it?

You stared at him for a few quiet seconds before giving him a shy nod and quickly leaving the room, closing the door behind you as you pressed your back against the door. All it took was one look from him to leave you breathless. No man has ever been able to make you feel like this with just a look. 

“I’m so fucking screwed,” you whispered to yourself, a blush creeping up your face. 

About 20 minutes later, you walked back into Joe’s room and saw that he was getting ready for the shoot. Your eyes traveled down his body as you took in his outfit, “Mm, this is all wrong,” you shook your head, everyone in the room looking over at you.

“Why?” the stylist asked. 

You walked over to Joe, “The colors are clashing with his complexion. The tan just blends in with his skin and those necklaces aren’t popping either,” you said while touching his shoulder, your gentle touch sending shivers down his spine as he looked up at you from his chair. 

“I think I can fix this. Everyone, out. I’ll bring him out in a few minutes,” you ordered, everyone nodding and leaving the room. 

“Damn, they didn’t hesitate to leave,” he laughed. 

You walked over to the clothing racks and looked over the variety of available clothes, “I take my job very seriously and they all know that our boss calls me the miracle worker for a reason. I can’t have you going out there looking like a tan bandage,” you giggled as you pulled out a plain black tank top, baggy black jeans, and a white and black letterman jacket. 

Joe stood up from the chair and stood next to you, “Here, put these on,” you said while handing him the clothes. “I’ll look at the chains and necklaces and see what I can do,” you nodded as you moved around him and went back to the vanity. 

Joe took the clothes and moved to the middle of the room, slowly peeling his clothes off as you remained unbothered and looked down at the chains. There was no other room for him to go into and change as the bathroom was like a broom closet, so he had to get changed right there. 

“Oo, this one looks good,” you said as you picked up a chain and turned around, your body freezing once you saw him standing there with no shirt and just his boxers on. 

Your eyes were glued to his chest, a warm feeling taking over your body again as you looked at his perfectly crafted tan frame. “Fuck, why does he have to be so hot,” you thought to yourself. 

Your eyes widened at the thought you just had before Joe spoke up, “Uhh, my bad,” he said, still standing there half-naked.

“I..I..uh,” you stuttered. “You’re good, that’s on me,” you stuttered again as your eyes traveled down his body to his pelvis, your breath hitching in your throat as you saw something you’d never thought you’d see.

“Give me a few seconds,” Joe said as he quickly put everything on. 

“Take all the time you need,” you blushed as you kept your head down and turned around, Joe’s gaze stuck on you the entire time he was changing. He wanted to touch you so badly–feel your plump pink lips against his and your manicured hands scratching down his back. But equally, he wanted to get to know you. He wanted to peel off your clothes but also to peel you like an onion, peeling back each layer and getting to know you on a deeper level than what he saw on the surface. 

The rest of the shoot went like this as well, he just couldn’t take his eyes off of you. You stayed where he was the entire day as you said you would, so his eyes would instantly move over to you after every shot since you were right next to the camera. You even caught him staring at you a few times, each time thinking that he’d stop but he wouldn’t. You even found your gaze lingering on him when he wasn’t looking. You couldn’t help it, he looked insanely good. And he noticed, of course. Each time you stared at him for longer than normal, he could feel it. 

You wondered what about you made him so unfocused and distracted, unable to figure out if it was because there was something wrong with you or if he just wanted to get in your pants for a quick hookup and this was his way of drawing you in. You didn’t say anything to him about it because you tried to remain professional, but also because you thought that maybe the answer when you asked him wasn’t something you wanted to hear. 

Until the end of the shoot came around, delaying the inevitable wasn’t working anymore. If you weren’t going to say something, Joe sure was. 

“So…,” he cleared his throat and spoke up as you were looking through a few of the shots in his dressing room with him. “Thanks for helping me out today with everything. You’re really good at all this. Not just PR and work stuff, but also keeping me entertained,” he said as he looked over at you. 

In between shots and filming, you two actually had a few great conversations with each other. You talked about how you got involved in PR, and your thoughts on football–telling him that you lived and breathed football and had been since you were little so this was pretty fun for you, then talked about your favorite season which for both of you was fall which then led to you two bonding over your mutual fondness for pumpkin pie, and then talked a little about your likes and dislikes. 

Joe got to see your humorous side as well, he even lost count of how many times you had made him laugh. He also saw a little bit of your nerdy and brainy side, a dichotomy to the stupid jokes you made. You were quite literally perfect in every aspect, the most flawless person he had ever met. Each time you talked, Joe saw a little sparkle in your eyes; a sparkle that he wanted to never stop seeing now that he had been exposed to it. Every time you opened your mouth to talk, he got lost in your eyes, and that drove him crazy. 

“I’m a woman of many talents,” you grinned. “Also, I didn’t mind because you’re actually a pretty cool guy,”.

“You sound surprised?” Joe said, acting like he was offended. 

You were opening your mouth to say something, but all that came out was a soft laugh. “It’s just...the things I hear about you and how great and normal you are outside of football, I didn’t really believe it?”.

“Really?” Joe said, sitting up in his seat and rubbing his hands on his thighs out of nervousness. “Why is that?”.

“I just….you’re this millionaire quarterback who has the looks, the brains, the athletic ability, and all the money. That’s the formula for a Playboy douchebag but the way you portray yourself to the public doesn’t align with that. I just thought it was a front for your brand and image, but today’s showed me that it’s not,” you said. “You’re a pretty cool person,”.

While Joe got to see a bit of your personality, you got to see the same from him too; and the part you saw, you loved. He was funny, grounded, and legitimately a caring person. Whether it was him talking about his football journey or talking about his silly interests–he laid himself bare and was fully honest about himself. 

“Go on a date with me,” Joe blurted out, that being the only thought in his head for the past hour.  

You flinched when you heard him say that, your heart dropping from your chest all the way to your feet, “Woahh, I know I said you’re a cool person but I never said that I-,”.

“I know. And I’m probably being way too blunt right now but I want to go on a date with you. Like really bad,”.

“You don’t even know if I have a boyfriend or not,” you huffed, entertained by his confidence. 

“With the way you were looking at me during the shoot, either you don’t or you have a wandering eye,” he laughed. 

“Fuck, he saw me? This is so embarrassing,” you thought to yourself. 

“Don’t think I didn’t see the amount of times you were staring at me too. Way more than the times I looked at you,” you said, flipping it back onto him to hide your embarrassment. 

“That’s because I want you,” he blurted out again, this newfound confidence coming out of nowhere. He had never been this straightforward with a girl, especially a girl he had just met. You were special. 

Your eyebrows felt like they shot up to the roof, “You’re very forward, aren’t you?” you laughed. 

“Only when I’m serious about something,” he nodded. 

He’s just trying to get in your pants right? No way he was really interested in you. “Joe, you’re sweet, super flirty, but sweet. But I don’t think this is a good idea,” you sighed. 

“Not a good idea? Who were you trying to please? You’re not some angel saint, this Greek god-like man literally said he wants you. What the fuck are you doing? Jump his bones already!” your subconscious said. 

“Why not?” Joe crossed his arms and asked. 

“I mean, I don’t even know you and-,”.

“That’s what first dates are for,” he interrupted.

“Okay, but I’m just a normal girl and you’re this hotshot Quarterback. You could have anyone you wanted so why-,”.

“You’re perfect, like insanely perfect in every aspect and not just your looks. I don’t want anyone else,” he interrupted again. 

“How do I know you’re not just looking for a quick hookup? You are an athlete after all and-,”.

“Don’t judge a book by its flashy cover,” he interrupted, again. “Get to know me. The real me. You got a sneak peek of the real me today. He wasn’t so bad, was he?”. 

You were speechless. He had an answer for every doubt you had and he was oh-so persistent. 

You looked down at your hands, fidgeting with the rings on your fingers because you didn’t know what to say. You wanted to peel his onion and get to know him, but you were scared that if you did, it would leave you in tears–and not the good kind. Even though you’d only spent a few hours with him, he made it memorable and special. The conversations you two had were as if you were just two old friends catching up, not as if you were two strangers who had just met. He had this aura around him that was pulling you in even though you were trying to hold back. 

Joe saw your uncertain facial expression and scooted closer to you, lifting your chin with his hand to meet his eyes. “Listen, go on one date with me. Just one. If you don’t leave with a smile on your face and a warm feeling in your heart, I’ll leave you alone. We can pretend like it never happened,”.  

“....Really? You’d do that, leave me alone? You’re pretty stubborn so…,” you giggled. 

“Very funny, Y/N,” he rolled his eyes. “But yeah, I would. I hope I don’t have to because there’s something about you that just draws me in and it’s not just how beautiful you are. I don’t know what it is, but it’s like a magnetic pull and I felt it the first time I looked at you,”.

“You have a way with words,” you smiled. 

“I’m serious though. I want to get to know you, if you’ll let me,” he added, the seriousness in his voice making you feel less nervous about the situation. 

You bit your lip and thought over his offer for a few seconds. “It can’t be that bad? He seems really sweet, respectful (but flirty as fuck), and is acting like he genuinely likes you. Not every guy is looking for a quick fuck and he was right, don’t judge a book by its flashy cover. You peeled a layer of his onion so far and you liked what you saw, you should keep peeling because it probably gets better and not worse. Right?” your subconscious said. “This could be different. You never know unless you try,”.

“Fine. I’ll go on a date with you,” you said while you looked back up at him, his eyes filled with desire and curiosity. 

“Perfect,” he beamed, mentally doing a little dance because he got you to agree. “I’ll swing by tomorrow after you’re wrapped up here and take you out to the best first–maybe last–date possible,”.

“I’m counting on it,” you nodded. You weren’t sure why you were giving him a chance, but it felt right for some reason. This was either the worst decision you’ve ever made in your life or the best decision you’ve ever made in your life. 

Oh, and Joe made sure that it was the best decision you’d ever made in your life. The date was quite literally perfect. He was quite literally perfect. 

And given how well it went, it wasn’t your last date. It was the first of many, many exciting and special dates. 

You left that first date just as he thought you would–with a smile and a warm feeling radiating throughout your body; but also with another feeling.

A feeling of intrigue. 

You wanted to get to know him just as much as he wanted to get to know you. You wanted to get to know him more than you already had during your date. 

You wanted to get to know Joe in every single way possible.  

End of flashback 

“I was stubborn as fuck and even though you were hesitant, you still agreed to go on one date with me. I came into that date nervous and awkward as hell because I was scared that you wouldn’t enjoy it and that you didn’t feel the same spark that I did, but I was wrong. We left that date hand in hand, laughing until our stomachs hurt, with your head on my shoulder, and with your name carved in on my heart. You peeled my whole onion in one date and nobody has ever been able to do that. That was the moment I knew that you’d be the one. I swear I fell in love with you the moment I saw you and that date made me double down on those feelings. You’re kind, compassionate, and the most stunning woman I’ve ever laid my eyes on. You never fail to make me laugh, you’re always finding new ways to make me fall even more in love with you, and you’re exactly what I picture when I think about my forever person. You’re exactly what I needed in my life; with you, there are no empty spaces. My entire world is complete because of you,”.

You felt tears pool in your eyes as he continued talking, “Joe-,” you sobbed.

“I’m not done, yet,” he laughed. “I’ve thought about this moment every day since that Wedding. The thought of you being the one makes my heart hurt, in a good way obviously. I physically can’t live without you, everything I do is for you. I live for you, I love for you, I burn for you, Y/N. It’s all for you,”.

“He’s perfect. He literally cannot get more perfect. I love him so much,” you thought to yourself.

“I brought you back here to this special spot so I could do this,” he said as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a red velvet box. He got down on one knee in front of you, the sobs getting harder as he opened the box and showed you the gorgeous princess-cut diamond ring. 

“Princess Cut. He remembered,” you thought to yourself, tears streaming down your cheeks like a river breaking through a dam, fast and uncontrollable. 

Your heart was about to beat out of your chest, he was actually about to do it. He was about to do the one thing that you had dreamed about for as long as you could remember. “You’re the one, Y/N. You always have been, and you always will be. Will you marry me and let me be the one for you?” he said as he opened the box and looked up into your eyes, his glossy with a few tears.

“You already are, Joe. You’ve always been the one,” you choked out as you cupped his face. “You’ve been the one since the day we met. Yes, I’ll marry you,” you smiled through your sobs.

Joe’s entire soul lit up when you said that, fireworks set off inside his body as he took the ring out of the box and slipped it onto your ring finger. “I love you, Y/N,” he choked out as you crouched down and pulled him in close for a tight hug, tucking his head into your neck and rubbing his neck as you felt a few tears from him drip down onto your shoulder. 

“I love you, Joe. I love you so fucking much,” you smiled as tears slid down your face. You moved his head out from your neck, cupping his adorable face and pulling him in for a kiss, a kiss that quickly became heated. 

“Whew, gotta hit the brakes, we’re still in public,” you giggled as you ran your thumb under his eye. 

“Who cares,” he smiled as he moved his hands down to cup your ass and chased your lips for another kiss, planting a few around your cheek before ending at your lips.  “Wait,” he said as he pulled away. “You didn’t just say ‘yes’ because of the fact that you have to do whatever I say for a whole day, right?”. 

“Are you kidding?” you broke out laughing. “I would say ‘yes’ solely because of that condition even if I didn’t actually want to willingly marry you. I said ‘yes’ because I wanted to, not because I was forced to. However, I wouldn’t complain if I was forced? Being married to you either way sounds like the best thing ever,”. 

“Mmm, I love you,” Joe mumbled as he pulled you in for another kiss. 

“So,” he said as he pulled away and kissed your right cheek. “Fucking,” he said as he kissed your left cheek. “Much,” he said as he kissed your nose. “Mrs. Burrow,” he said as he ended the sentence with another kiss on your soft lips. 

“Ooo, I like that name,” you giggled. 

“Yeah?” he asked with a laugh.

“Mhm, and I love you, Mr. Burrow,” you smiled against his lips. 

One month later - Las Vegas, Nevada 

 “Woo, we had a little too much to drink tonight,” you giggled as you and Joe stumbled into your hotel suite. 

“What do you mean? I feel amaaaazing,” Joe drunkenly laughed as he let go of your hip and set you down on the couch before plopping down next to you. 

“Leave it to us to get fucked up within 5 hours of being in Vegas,” you rolled your eyes while slipping your heels off. 

You and Joe had been in LA for the past week for some of Joe’s offseason training & brand sponsorships and decided to end your visit to the West Coast with a trip to Las Vegas for a few days. You had gotten to your hotel around mid-afternoon and immediately got changed and went out, first attending a classic Vegas magic show but not before you tricked Joe into thinking you bought Magic Mike tickets instead and his reaction was priceless. 

Flashback to earlier 

“What the fuck do you mean you got Magic Mike tickets,” Joe said, his jaw practically on the floor. 

“That means, I got us Magic Mike tickets,” you smirked as you slipped on a sparkly black skintight short dress. “Front Row too,”. 

You could practically see the steam coming off of Joe’s face, his cheeks turning a shade of red you had only seen a few times; times when he got jealous. “Absolutely not,” Joe grumbled as he grabbed your wrist and spun you around so that you were facing him and not the mirror. 

“Why not?” you said with a furtive grin, his grip on your wrist sending chills down your spine. 

“Because,” Joe said while motioning at you with his free hand. 

“Words, baby. I can’t read minds,” you laughed.

“Because I don’t want half-naked men ogling at my sexy fiance right in front of me,” he snarled. “Especially when she’s wearing a dress that’s showing off too much cleavage for public view,”.

“So it’s okay if they do it not in front of you,” you said, perking up and flashing him a full tooth smile. “Because I can go alone,” you shrugged. 

“What? No,” Joe chirped. “I don’t want any half-naked men ogling at you, not in front of me or behind my back,”.

“But Joeee,” you whined. “It’ll be fun,”.

“Please, I cannot believe he actually thinks I want to go to a Magic Mike show,” you thought to yourself. 

“Y/N, no man needs to be giving you a lap dance in front of your to-be husband. No man needs to be giving you a lap dance period,” he said, his voice laced with sternness. 

“What if I want them to,” you said while crossing your arms from displeasure. 

“What,” Joe said, his jaw falling to the ground again as his eyebrows shot up. 

“Yeah,” you nodded. “You can get eye-fucked by every girl that’s in your vicinity and I never say anything. Maybe I want a few guys to do the same to me without your objection,”. 

When the words left your mouth, you saw his jaw clench and the veins on his arm pop, “Oh fuck, he’s mad mad,” you thought to yourself.  

“Am I not enough?” Joe asked, the tension in the room now so thick you could cut it with a knife. 

“Joe, I-” you began to say. 

“No, seriously. Is my attention not enough that you need random sweaty men in skimpy outfits to make you feel good?” he said while crossing his arms at his chest, a pose that signaled that he was upset. “If you want that kind of attention, why are we even engaged? Why are you even with me? Being single and being as gorgeous as you are can get you all of that kind of attention you so clearly want,”. 

Your smile dropped as you could practically feel in your soul how this joke didn’t sit well with him through his voice. Joe was a pretty sensitive guy even if he didn’t show it and this joke clearly made him feel pretty awful because he was saying these things he normally would never say.  

You looked up and walked closer to him, cupping his face with your hands as he refused to look at you in the eyes. “Hey, Hey, look at me,” you softly said as you tilted his head back to look at you. “I’m just kidding, Joey,” you said, your softened eyes telling him that you were being truthful. 

“W- What?” he choked out.

“It’s a prank…a really dumb prank, but a prank. There are no Magic Mike tickets and there are no men that I want eye-fucking me, other than you obviously,” you laughed. “I was just messing with you. I got us the David Copperfield tickets at MGM like we talked about,”. 

“You’re serious?” he hesitantly asked. 

“So serious. I’m sorry I made you feel like you weren’t enough. You are more than enough for me, more than I can honestly handle,” you winked, earning a soft chuckle from him.

“Sorry I got so worked up over that,” he shook his head as he placed his hands on your hips, the pad of his thumb rubbing the sparkly fabric. “I just don’t want anything ruining this, even if it’s some rando Vegas stripper getting too close to you because it’s part of the show,”. 

“Nothing is ruining this,” you said while looping your arms around his neck. “I’m here with you, and only you. My to-be husband, my favorite person in the world, my bestest friend–don’t tell Sophia I said that, and the sexiest person alive. I don’t need random men to make me feel good when I have you,” you said while scratching his scalp. 

“You make me feel good,” you smiled. “In every,” you whispered as you pressed a wet kiss to the corner of his lips. “Single,” you whispered as you planted a few kisses on his cheek. “Way,” you whispered as you pulled away and looked him in the eyes. “Possible,” you whispered before you crashed your lips against his. 

End of flashback 

After a quick makeout sesh, you both went to the magic show and then hit up a few clubs along The Strip, which was the reason you were both completely out of your senses. The alcohol and hint of weed in both your systems were really pushing you both onto a different planet. 

“It was worth it though,” Joe shrugged. “I had the time of my life watching you struggle to drink all the Jello Shots by yourself,”.

“And that is the last time I make a bet against you,” you sighed.

“Let this be a reminder to never make a bet about anything sports-related against an actual athlete,” he slurred as he got up from the couch to walk over to the mini-kitchen and grab you both some water. 

You got up right after him, following him into the kitchen as you started fiddling with the fabric of your dress which was scratching against your skin and making you incredibly uncomfortable. You hopped up onto the counter as Joe opened the fridge and pulled out two bottles, his eyes navigating towards you as you were pulling down the straps of your dress.

“What’re you doing?” he laughed as he set the bottles next to you.

“Trying to get the hell out of this dress,” you whined, an idea popping up into your head when you glanced over at him. You reached out for his hand and pulled him over to you, spreading your legs open to accommodate his large body, allowing him to step in between them. “Maybe you could help me?” you smirked as you pulled him down for a kiss.

His veiny hands settled on your waist as you leaned back, your hands cupping his cheeks as your lips moved against each other in a sensual tango. You both had so much pent-up energy from your activities earlier and going out tonight made it even worse. Joe’s eyes were glued to you the entire time at the clubs you went to, even though you two were stuck to each other’s side the whole time anyway. You just looked so insanely good that the only thoughts in his brain were ones he would get slapped for if he said them in public. 

Everything about you was sending him into overdrive tonight; the way your dress hugged your body in all the right spots, the way your hair bounced each time you laughed, the way your beautiful eyes would look into his, the way your soft pink lips were curled into a smile the entire night, and the way you were stuck to him like glue–reminding everyone in the room that he was all yours. 

His eyes were also glued to the massive diamond ring on your ring finger, a constant reminder that you were all his. 

But that ring being a reminder wasn’t enough. He couldn’t wait to make you all his. 

“Mm, Joe,” you moaned into the kiss, the taste of alcohol lingering on his tongue which made the kiss more intoxicating. “Fuck, I need you,” you whispered against his lips as he pulled away. Those words usually ignited a fire within Joe that couldn’t be burned out until you two ended up naked in bed after spending a good amount of time partaking in certain activities, but this time those words seemingly didn’t do anything. 

“Let’s get married tomorrow night,” Joe blurted out as he looked into your eyes with nothing but a look of raw desire and excitement.

You stared at him like he had two heads, breaking out into a fit of laughter a few seconds later. “Oh my god, you’re funny,” you laughed while pulling him back to you using the collar of his shirt, attaching your lips to his for another kiss before he abruptly pulled away.

“Y/N, I’m not kidding,” he said.

“Joe, you’re drunk. We’re both very drunk,” you giggled as you rubbed his cheek. 

“I know, but I’m sober enough to know that I want to marry you tomorrow,” he said, turning serious as he pulled away from you. 

You hopped off of the counter and stood in front of him, still not being able to take him seriously. “Can we talk about this later? Why don’t we go to bed and finish talking about some other things first,” you said while running your hands up his chest and cupping his big shoulders. 

“Nope. We’re getting married tomorrow night which means we have to abstain from having sex so that the first time we do as a married couple is special,” he said, stepping back from you. 

You think he’s just messing with you like you were earlier, so you decide to play along and tease him to hopefully break his front. Since you were out of your mind drunk, there was no logic available in your brain to stop you. You quickly yank off your dress and are left standing in front of him in your matching bra and black lace panties, his breath hitching in his throat as the tent in his pants grows at the sight of your gorgeous body.

“You sure about that?” you said while raising an eyebrow, knowing that he could never resist putting his hands on you when you were half-naked in front of him. 

“Yeah,” he cleared his throat and said, “I’m sure,”. 

“Okay, but you can’t be so sure when you’re sitting next to me in that big bed…all alone…just the two of us…with nobody in sight that could interrupt us,” you teased while giving him a slow once-over. 

“Fuck, why does she have to make this harder than it already is,” Joe thought to himself, an idea quickly popping up into his head that would solve this problem.

“But that’s just the thing. I won’t be sitting next to you in bed,” he smirked.

“What?” you asked.

“I’m sleeping in the second bedroom,” Joe wiggled his eyebrows and said as he walked around you towards the bedroom. 

Your jaw dropped to the floor, “Joe!” you yelled as you followed him through the large suite. “You wouldn’t dare,”. 

“Ohhh, but I would,” he laughed as he glanced back at you, watching as you quickly matched his pace and walked up next to him. 

“Joe, we haven’t had sex in 2 days,” you complained. “I can’t take it anymore,”.

“And that’s exactly why tomorrow night will be better,” he smirked as he made it to the little hallway where the bedrooms were, opening the door of the second one and flipping around on the doorstep so you couldn’t come in. “Nope. Your room is over there,” he pointed across the little hallway as you bumped into his chest, then backed up because of the stubborn smile on his adorable face.  

“You’re not serious,” you said while placing your hands on your hips.

“I’m very serious,” he slurred and nodded. “We can’t be in the same bed before we get married,”. 

“Fine,” you huffed, seeing that he wasn’t going to budge so you shouldn’t waste your breath trying to get him to cave. Whenever Joe set his mind on doing something, he always did it.

“You’re going to wake up and regret this, Burrow. And stop with the marriage thing. Our wedding is in July, not tomorrow,” you shook your head and turned around to go into the bedroom you’d been sleeping in alone tonight. 

“I loveeee youuuu,” he grinned as you opened the door to the room.

You turned around and couldn’t help but giggle at the scene, “You make me crazy, but I love you too. But also, I’m still mad at you for this,” you said as you turned your smile back into a pout, earning a throaty laugh for him before he closed his door. 

A few minutes later, you were lying on your back and staring up at the ceiling, absolutely bored out of your mind as the ache between your thighs got stronger and stronger and the only person who could fix it refused to come near you. 

“Fuck,” you whispered to yourself as you ran your hands along your neck. You still couldn’t quite understand how Joe could still get you like this years later. Back then, getting turned on by him was a given because you hadn’t gotten a taste of what this was like with him consistently. But now, you had gotten plenty of tastes and he still got you like this. Either you were insatiable as hell or he was just too damn good. Or maybe it was a bit of both. 

Flashback to your 4th date 

“Tonight was really fun,” you smiled over at Joe, who was walking you to the front step of your house. He had taken you out on your 4th date tonight, taking you to glow-in-the-dark Mini Golf and treating you to dinner at a retro diner nearby. Every date with Joe just got better and better; you couldn’t get enough of him. You couldn’t get enough of his contagious laugh, silly stories, and his constant looks of admiration for you. That pull he talked about feeling from you, yeah, you were feeling it for him too. Everything about him made you happy. He was a walking ray of sunshine in your life which was something you desperately needed. 

“I’m glad you had fun,” he smiled as he led you over to your door. “I hope this isn’t getting too boring for you,” he said while scratching his neck. Although everything was going smoothly between the two of you, he couldn’t help the few doubts that crept through. 

“Boring?” you laughed. “Joe, please. Our first date solidified that you are physically incapable of ever boring me. I mean, we were in that restaurant for 4 and a half hours,”. 

“Yeah, you’re right,” he chuckled. “You managed to get my entire life story out of me in those 4 ish hours, even shit I’ve never told anyone,”.

“I peeled your onion pretty quickly, didn’t I?” you smiled as you played with the rings on your fingers. “I didn’t even cry,”.

Joe’s heart skipped a beat and his eyes instantly moved from the ground to your eyes. “Onion? Peeling my onion? She compares people to onions too? Like me?” Joe thought to himself. 

“You- you compare people to onions too?” he swallowed. 

“Yeah,” you giggled. “I know it’s silly, but people are like onions just less smelly–they both have layers. There is more to what is seen on the surface, you know? Like each layer represents different parts of your personality,  experiences, emotions, and thoughts. As you get to know someone better, you peel back these layers, discovering deeper and more complex parts about them,” you smiled. “But doing so can also make you cry, because well, onions can make you cry just like people can,”.

“You’re everything I’ve ever wanted,” Joe whispered out loud, his cheeks turning red once he realized he just said that to you. 

“….I am?” you blushed as you rocked back and forth on your feet.

“I..uh…yeah,” he stuttered, feeling a spark inside of his heart. “I compare people to onions too but I’ve never met anyone who does the same,” he nervously smiled, hoping that he didn’t just weird you out by saying you were everything he’s ever wanted—even though it was 100% truthful. 

“Look at us being on the same wavelength,” you smiled as you grabbed his hand and entwined your fingers. 

“That’s really cool,” he shyly smiled, the blush on his cheeks now matching the blush on yours and his eyes staring deeply into yours as you held onto his hand. You both continued to stare at each other in silence, not exactly sure why but it felt right. You didn’t want to let go of his hand and quite frankly, you didn’t want to let go of him either. Tonight was amazing, and you didn’t want it to end. You didn’t want him to leave. 

“I should get going,” Joe said as he broke eye contact and looked down at his watch, letting go of your hand which startled you. 

“Or you could stay?” You quickly said as you looked back up at him with hopeful eyes. You and Joe hadn’t spent the night together yet so this would be the first time you’d ever stayed over at each other's house. The first time it would be just the two of you, together, in a quiet house, with a bed, for hours. 

Specifically with a bed. 

You’d be lying if you said there wasn’t a single unholy thought in your head about the man standing in front of you. You had managed to keep it PG between you both—except for the occasional wandering hands during a little make-out session—but you wanted nothing more than for him to touch you everywhere, to kiss you everywhere, and to make you feel like the most special girl on the planet. 

You wanted Joe so bad. You tried to fight it when you first met, but you couldn’t stay away and his extraordinary personality made it even harder. He was the epitome of sexiness, the textbook definition of perfection. From his gorgeous dirty blonde curls to his adorable ski slope nose, to his killer jawline, down to his plump pink lips, and then to his crafted-from-gold chest that you wanted to run your fingers along, he was the hottest man you’d ever come across. And he was all yours. 

But were you all his? Did he want you as bad as you wanted him? 

“Are you sure?” Joe said while anxiously playing with his wristbands. 

“Yeah,” you nodded. “I had a lot of fun tonight and I don’t want it to end. We could go inside and watch a movie or something,” you said while turning around to unlock the door. “If you want to, obviously,”.

“I’d love to,” Joe contently sighed, a feeling of excitement sparking inside of him as he followed you inside your house.  

It was just the two of you, in this house, alone, at night. Nothing bad could happen, right? 

But what if you wanted something bad to happen? 

What if you both wanted something bad to happen? 

A half-hour passed by and you and Joe were sitting on your couch, watching “The Proposal”. You would think since you put on a classic & incredibly sweet romantic comedy, you and Joe would be curled up in each other's arms and glued to each other as you laughed your hearts out. 

But you weren’t.

Instead, you two were awkwardly sitting next to each other with none of your body parts touching each other and with both of your hearts beating out of your chests because of how nervous you felt. 

By saying that you both kept your relationship PG so far, you really meant PG. Yeah, you two kissed a lot and even had a few spicy make-outs, but oddly enough—cuddling wasn’t common. Hell, you barely even cuddled with each other. Cuddling was so intimate and special, the feeling of your bodies pressed against each other out of pure love and comfort was unmatchable.

That’s why you both are so nervous right now. This was a prime cuddle moment. You wanted to scooch over and lay your head down on his chest while he wrapped his arm around your waist, but you were too scared he wouldn’t want to. How could you go there if you couldn’t even cuddle him without getting anxious and nervous? The fact that you even wanted to cuddle with him was enough to scare you. Since when did you get so comfy around a guy so quickly? 

“Snap out of it, Y/N. Stop getting in your head over this,” you thought to yourself. 

Joe was nervous because you made him nervous. He’d been pretty vocal about how badly he wanted you—your first meeting clearly giving that away—and those feelings were heightened right now because of the situation you were in. You were coming off of a really good date night and were all alone in your house; the situation couldn’t be more perfect for things to happen. Things Joe literally spent hours thinking about. 

He was so down bad for you and he hadn’t even gotten a full taste of what you had to offer. It was insane. “Come on, Joe. Pull her over. Why are you sitting like you don’t know each other? She’s literally made out with you in your lap so why are you being so awkward?” he thought to himself. “Wake the fuck up, Joe. This is your girl,”. 

“My girl,” he mumbled under his breath, causing you to look over at him.

“Did you say something?” you breathed out, your palms getting sweaty as your brain wouldn’t shut up about how awkward this situation was.

“Hm? Oh…no,” Joe said, his cheeks turning red again once he realized he said that out loud. “I’m gonna go get a glass of water, you want one?” He quickly changed the subject and got up.

“Oh, I’m good,” you swallowed, letting out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding in once he walked around the couch and back to the kitchen. 

“A glass of water. That’s what I need,” Joe thought to himself as he grabbed a glass from your cabinet and poured himself some water, looking up a few times and seeing you laughing adorably on the couch in front of him. “When you go back, sit down closer to her. Put your arm around her, girls love that,” Joe’s subconscious said.

Joe took a final sip of the icy cold water—a much needed refresher—before he walked back over to the couch, your eyes following him as he sat down next to you. As he sat down closer to you. 

You froze as you felt his arm touching your arm, and then suddenly felt him move his arm and place it around your shoulder, then felt him pull you into his warm chest. “Oh my god,” you thought to yourself as you heard his heartbeat through his chest. “Wait, is he nervous too?”.

You stayed quiet and frozen for a few seconds before literally melting against him. The feeling of his thumb rubbing your skin and his head leaning against yours was something you craved, and now you finally had it. You felt like a piece of melting chocolate on a warm tongue. 

Joe smiled as he felt you relax against him, planting a sweet kiss on your forehead as you got comfy on him. This calmed all of his doubts and nerves, you felt comfortable with him and that’s all that mattered. 

“This is nice,” you smiled up at him a few moments later, showing your appreciation for his actions. 

“It’s very nice,” Joe chuckled, his laugh vibrating through your body. “I’m glad you feel comfortable around me, I got a bit nervous there,”.

“Feel my palms, Joey. They’re sweaty as hell. I feel nervous around you,” you giggled.

“Nervous? Why are you nervous?” He questioned.

“…Because,” you said while taking a deep breath and turning serious. “I’ve never felt this way about a guy before. Especially this fast,”.

“Really?” He said while looking down at you.

“Yeahhhh,” you sighed. “It takes me a minute to get comfortable around a guy like this. I usually have all my walls up early on because I’m scared that if I don’t, they’ll see the most vulnerable parts of me and then they’ll know exactly what my achilles heel is. I’ve made the stupid mistake of letting my walls down early on a few times, and that’s exactly what happened. They used it against me, and that really fucked me up for a while,”.

Joe's heart broke when he saw your eyes slowly getting glossier as you talked. “I’m- I’m sorry,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. 

“No, don’t be,” you smiled up at him. “You haven’t done anything wrong and that’s why I’m nervous. Usually by now, a guy does something that ticks me off and leaves a sour taste in my mouth. But you? You haven’t done a single thing,” you beamed. 

“So that’s good?” he nervously asked

“It’s great,” you said while leaning up to plant a big kiss on his lips. “I don’t know what it is about you, but I don’t feel the need to put my walls up. I have really, really strong feelings about you. I haven’t even known you for that long, but I know you won’t ever do anything to hurt me,”. 

He wouldn’t. Joe would never do anything to hurt you, never in a million years. He wouldn’t hurt someone that he loved. 

Yeah, he loved you. Was it too early to say it? Absolutely. But he couldn’t help the powerful feelings he felt about you. He’d never fell this fast and hard for a girl, you were clearly unique. “I wouldn’t ever dream of hurting someone so precious and extraordinary,” Joe smiled as he pecked your lips. 

“I knew I liked you for a reason,” you smiled as you buried your face in his chest, his arm tightly wrapping around your waist, his hand slipping a little under your shirt. The feeling of his warm hand against your bare skin sends jolts of electricity throughout your body. 

“Tell me about your exes. I want to know what things they did that ticked you off early on so I know what not to do,” Joe said while he squeezed the soft plush skin of your waist. 

“I don’t think you’ll make the same mistakes they did, trust me. But okay, if you really want to know I won’t stop you,” you laughed. You spent a few minutes ranting to Joe about your exes, his jaw-dropping each time you said something they did—each ex progressively getting worse each time. 

“Where are you finding these guys? Like this is insane,” he said with a wide-eyed stare. 

“Tell me about it,” you rolled your eyes. “And my most recent ex, please,” you scoffed. “You can’t be an incompetent boyfriend and be bad in bed at the same time,”. 

“No way,” Joe gasped.

“Mhmmm. Only cared about getting himself off; never once thought about me and how I felt. I should’ve known, if you can’t take care of a girl in bed then you definitely can’t take care of a girl in a relationship,” you shook your head.

“I’d take care of you,” Joe mumbled under his breath, but just loud enough for you to hear.

“You would?” you smirked as you looked up and said, a gush of wetness instantly pooling at your core. 

“Did I seriously say that out loud AGAIN? Can I not keep anything in my head?” Joe thought to himself. 

He stayed quiet for a few seconds before speaking up, “Yeah, I would,” he boldly said. “Fuck it. This is my girl. She should know how I feel about her straight up, no beating around the bush,”.

You felt a pang of arousal shoot up your body, his alluring words waking up another side of you that you hadn’t seen in a while. “Really?” you asked as you shifted next to him, slowly moving up and placing your legs on each side of him, settling down in his lap. His hands moved down to cup your thighs as you moved his hair out of his eyes, your face just inches from his.

“Yeah,” he nodded as his eyes darkened with lust. “I don’t think I’ll have any issue getting you off before I get off,”.

You felt your breathing stop for a second, “Fuck,” you thought to yourself. “I need him, bad,”. Any and all nervousness and anxiety left your brain at this moment. You couldn’t care less about things that happened in your previous relationships, all you wanted to focus on was Joe. “You sound so sure,” you whispered as you leaned down and peppered kisses along his jaw, his hands moving to your back but slowly inching down to your ass.

“Because I am. I’ll make you scream my name so loudly that you’ll forget about all those other guys. I’ll be the only thing you remember,” he whispered into your ear, his voice thick with lust. 

A switch turned on when he said that and you immediately lifted your head from his jaw and crashed your lips down onto his, your hands cupping his cheeks as you pushed yourself closer to him, his lips fighting for dominance against yours as you ran your hands along his thick chest. 

You wanted him so badly. 

His lips were so addictive, the way they were so soft just felt like you were kissing a cloud. He moved his hands back up to your waist, his fingers tugging on the fabric of your t-shirt, “Bedroom?” he breathlessly asked you as he pulled away.

“Yes,” you panted as he quickly pulled your face back to his and got up from the couch, your legs wrapping tightly around his while he carried you up to your room. 

Once you got inside, he gently threw you down on the bed before ripping his clothes off, both of you moving with a sense of urgency.  When he was completely bare in front of you, that’s when you truly lost it. Your eyes traveled along his body, noticing each and every vein that you would so easily travel along, noticing every muscle and every spot that you deemed kissable. Your eyes then dipped down to the V in his abdomen, your breath stopping again when you saw his prominent erection, the tip of his cock pooling with precum.

“Fuck me. Literally and figuratively,” you thought to yourself. You looked back up at him and ripped your shirt and shorts off, quickly making yourself bare just like he was. Normally, you’d feel insecure and shy with a guy when it got to this point. But with Joe, all you felt was comfort and confidence, it was amazing. 

Joe looked down at you, taking in every part of your body for the first time; your perfect thighs, your soft belly, your perfect & gorgeous breasts. You were all his, and you were so beautiful. You felt a dip in the bed as he moved on top of you, “You’re gorgeous, Y/N,” he whispered as he peppered kisses along your chest. “So insanely gorgeous,”.

“Joe, I need you,” you whispered as you felt your core throb and your body relax underneath him. 

“Before we actually, you know, do it..you’re good, right? I don’t want you to feel any pressure or stress to do anything if you don’t really want to,” Joe said while tucking your hair behind your ear. 

You grabbed his hand and shoved it down to your core, his eyes looking down as you ran his fingers through your wetness. “You feel that? That’s all for you, Joe,” you blubbered, the way his fingers were sliding along your folds was teasing yet so satisfying. “Please, fuck me. Make me forget about them,” you said while intensely staring into his eyes, his eyes turning a shade of blue you’d never seen before. 

You wanted this just as bad as he did and he wanted this just as bad as you did. 

He leaned down and captured your lips in another heated kiss before sliding his hand up your belly to cup your breast, playing with the sensitive bud at the same time as he lined himself up with your dripping core and thrusted all the way into you, wasting no second to get straight to it. The intensity of the first thrust caught you completely off guard, the feeling of fullness and being stretched out by him for the first time making you abruptly pull away and let out a throaty moan. “Oh, fuck,” you moaned as he set a relentless pace. “Fuck, Joe,”.

“Fuck,” he whimpered above you, his hair falling down and acting as a curtain. “Jesus, you feel so good,” he groaned as the warm feeling of your walls felt like a tight hug around his cock. 

You placed your hands on his back, digging your nails into his muscular body as he continued to fuck you in the most delicious way possible; each thrust laced with need and infatuation. He grabbed your leg, cupping the back of your knee and pushing it up which opened you up even more, allowing him to hit new spots as he explored you in the most intimate way imaginable. “Does it feel…good,” Joe wailed as he pounded into your wet heat.

“It feels amazing,” you whimpered while throwing your head to the side, his lips instantly attacking your neck with little nips and sucks. The feeling of him inside you was sending electricity throughout your body, he was so good at this. Each thrust hit the right spot inside your core, each kiss landed on the right spot, and each word that left his mouth made you lose any and all control you had. He definitely was better than your exes, and he was definitely taking care of you. 

“F- fuck, Joe. P- please, fuck me forever,” the filthy words leaving your mouth surprised both you and Joe. 

“You’re so needy, baby,” he smirked as he peppered kisses along your jaw. “Were they that bad?” he asked, referring to your exes.

“Mmph,” you whimpered as you moved your head back to look at him. “S- so bad,” you moaned as his thick cock was grazing your g-spot. “Oh, right there,” you practically screamed. 

“What? Right here?” he smirked as he gave you an extra hard thrust, this one sending you up the bed.

“Joe,” you moaned again as your back arched off the bed, but he pushed you back down with his hand and continued to snap his hips into you. He dropped your leg and moved his hand to your abdomen, rubbing the soft skin of your belly and gently pushing down as he inched towards your breasts. He leaned down and took your nipple in his mouth, his tongue swirling around the sensitive peak as you threaded your hands through his hair. 

You lost track of the amount of times you moaned his name just like how you lost track of how much time had passed. There were no real thoughts in your head, all you could think about was how good this felt and how it was all because of Joe. Your chemistry was insane. It was like pure fire between you both.

You felt your arousal building in your stomach as he continued to send you over the edge, both of you moving with pure lust and desire. “You’re doing so well, Y/N…that’s it,” he whimpered as he dropped his head to the crook of your neck. “Fuck, you’re perfect,” he moaned.

You couldn’t help but smile, he was praising you and making you feel good at the same time. He was truly the perfect guy; he lacked in no area. Each time your name fell from his lips, you found yourself yearning for more and more. You deserved this, you deserved him, his love, his touch, his everything. 

“Joe, I’m so close,” you moaned, your chest heaving as the band in your stomach tightened with each thrust, the room filling with sounds of your pleasure and the wetness below. 

“Mmph, me too,” he whimpered, trying to hold back his release because he wanted to make sure that you felt your high first, just as how it should be. 

You looked down and saw his thick shaft moving in and out of your core, that sight alone made you let go. “Oh- oh,” you croaked as you felt him lift his head and move his hand down to your clit. 

“Come on, baby,” he panted as his fingers toyed with your sensitive clit. “Come for me,” he said as he leaned down to kiss you again. You lifted your legs and wrapped them around his waist, pulling his head closer to you at the same time as you moaned into the kiss. Your hips started jerking and bucking up into him, your body starting to tremble under him as you felt your walls spasm and contract around his cock. 

“Joe!” you screamed against his lips after one well-placed thrust, the tension snapping as you came around his cock. You were seeing stars at this point as your release soaked both your lower halves, Joe feeling his cock twitch inside of you. Your reaction, your rolling eyes, and the sounds leaving your lips were pushing him straight toward the finish line. 

“My girl…that’s my girl…,” he rasped as his hips stuttered and his thrusts became erratic, his high practically knocking at the door. “You’re so fucking hot,” he groaned as he watched you feel your high below him, your breathy moans that were filling the room being one of the greatest and prettiest things he had ever heard.

You let out a few more sounds of pleasure as you felt shockwaves throughout your body from your intense orgasm, your body fully limp as he dropped his head and bit down on your shoulder. “Oh, fuck..Y/N,” he moaned as he felt the band in his stomach tighten. He wanted to let go so bad, but he wasn’t going to make this “just good enough” for you. He was going to make this better than anything you’d ever felt before. 

“F- fuck, Joe,” you whispered, coming down from your high just to feel another one building as you felt your walls tightening around his cock again. Before you knew it, his hands were on your waist and he flipped you over so that you were on top. 

“W- what?” you panted as you placed your hands on his beautifully crafted chest, his cock still seated deeply inside of you. Your brain was so fogged up with arousal that you couldn’t comprehend what was going on. 

“Fuck, keep going,” he whimpered, his hands grabbing your waist again as you continued to stare down at him–a frisky grin appearing on your face as you leaned down to give him a passion-filled kiss. 

“You’re the best,” you whispered as you got back up, your hips starting to rock back and forth against his. He looked so right underneath you with his tousled curls and open mouth that was repeating your name over and over, this was meant to happen. Not only was your sexual chemistry on fire, but your emotional chemistry was too. He knew exactly what you wanted, how you wanted it, and knew how to give it to you without you having to say a single thing to him. 

He reached up to cup your breast with one hand, the pad of his thumb rubbing your nipple as you closed your eyes and quickened your pace against him, his arousal just begging to be released. The restraint he had was insane and quite frankly, it was killing him. But this was about you, not him.

“Just like that,” he whimpered, bucking his hips up into your core slowly, helping you reach your second orgasm faster. 

“Joe, I can’t…it’s too- you’re too…,” you said while letting out a shaky breath, this time your climax feeling stronger than the previous one. 

“Yes, you can,” he said as he slid his hand up your back, pushing you down to him and cupping the nape of your neck. “I’m right here,” he softly said against your lips.

“J- Joe,” you whimpered as you hid your face in his neck, his hips snapping into yours as you felt your thighs starting to burn.

“You make me crazy, Y/N,” he groaned as he moved his hand back down to your clit, his voice laced with pure need. “You make me so fucking crazy,”.

“Oh, Joe,” you moaned into his ear, placing a hand on the side of his neck as you opened your mouth to bite his earlobe. A thin layer of sweat was forming on both of you as your movements became more frantic like you were both chasing something you couldn’t get enough of. It was like an insatiable desire for more.

Joe started rubbing circles around your clit, your body reacting with a slight tremble as jolts of pleasure started vibrating through it. Your breathing was getting deeper and deeper and a few breathless seconds later, you felt him pinch your sensitive bud which ultimately set off your release. 

“Joe!” you screamed again as the strength of your orgasm made you sit back up, your movements stilling as you came around his still-moving cock again. “Oh my fucking god. You are not real,” you whimpered while your high washed over you.

“F- fuck. I’m,” Joe choked out, not being able to hold it in any longer. 

You looked down through your messy hair that was falling in front of your eyes and saw his face—specifically his scrunched up nose—and knew that now it was your turn to make him feel good. 

Although you were about two seconds away from passing out and still dealing with the aftershocks of your second high, you leaned down and smashed your lips against his while cupping his face, allowing him to do whatever he needed to feel as good as you did right now. A few more hip snaps later, he emptied himself inside of you—endless ropes of his warm cum filling your already—soaked core. This was the first time you’d ever felt him like this, and it was everything you’d dreamed of and more. Joe was everything you dreamed of and more.

A few minutes later, your body was lethargic as you lay on top of him, his arms tightly wrapped around your tired frame. You felt his hand rubbing the back of your head and playing with the strands of your hair, words of love and affection filling your ears as he went on and on about how perfect you were. 

Joe was truly the man of your dreams. Not only did he do what your ex couldn’t do, he did it twice, and he did it better than anyone else could. All while making you feel safe, comfortable, and in control. He was truly perfect for you in every way possible, emotionally and physically. 

“So?” Joe spoke up, his hand now rubbing slow circles around your back. “How was it?”.

You shifted your head on his chest to look up at him, “Are you god? I think I’ve been sent to heaven,” you giggled. 

“You liked it?” He softly asked again, a shy smile on his face.

“I loved it,” you grinned as you leaned up to peck his lips. “I loved all of it. You’re amazing,”. 

“No, you’re amazing. Seriously. I was already obsessed with you and your personality, but now I’m also obsessed with your body. You’re insanely beautiful and insanely sexy,” he blushed. 

“Awww, stop,” you blushed while patting his bare chest, pressing a few kisses along his pec. 

“Do you still remember their names?” Joe smirked, referring to how he told you he’d make you scream his name so loudly that you’d forget the others. 

Of course, you didn’t, Joe made sure you didn’t. He worshiped your body tonight and his name left your lips like you were chanting a sacred prayer. He was unlike anyone you’d ever been with before, he was special. 

“Whose names?” you grinned up at him. “I only know one name,” you added as you scooted up so that you were by his ear. 

“What name?” Joe said while biting his swollen bottom lip. 

“Joe,” you whispered into his ear, the sultry tone of your voice making Joe instantly pull you right back underneath the covers.

“Joeeee,” you giggled as he flipped you over and the white covers created a cocoon around you two. 

“What?” he grinned down at you. “You thought I was done?”.

“Maybe,” you teasingly shrugged. 

“Well, I’m not. That was just the beginning,” he winked as he leaned down and peppered wet kisses down your abdomen, his head eventually disappearing in between your thighs. 

You looked back up, not knowing what to expect since seemingly you were doing everything with him in one night—not that you were complaining. You hadn’t even mentally prepared yourself for him to go down on you, this position was so incredibly intimate and raw. 

But he didn’t give you a chance to overthink because suddenly, you felt his warm mouth latch onto your swollen clit and a finger thrust into your core, another shock of pleasure vibrating through your body. “Joe,” you moaned loudly, your brain turning off as he threw your leg over his shoulder. The only coherent thought in your head was that he was the best thing that could’ve ever happened to you. 

End of flashback 

“Holy fuck,” you whispered to yourself as you snapped back to the present. The spicy memory made you feel even more needier than before and you had absolutely no idea what to do. You knew he wasn’t going to budge but you definitely were not going to be able to fall asleep like this. “Of course, the universe gave me the sexiest guy known to mankind,” you grumbled as you stuffed your face in your hands, “I can’t stand being away from him,”. You still couldn’t quite believe that he was all yours and would be forever. He was truly one of the most special people you’d ever met in your life and he changed your world in a way you thought was impossible. You were going to marry him in a few short months (or tomorrow based on Joe’s silly drunken thoughts that he would most likely forget about) and get to spend the rest of your life with him. You couldn’t ask for anything better, your life was perfect. 

You sat on the bed for a few more minutes, thinking of a way to cool yourself down because you could just feel your body getting hotter and hotter as the minutes passed by. All you could think about was Joe.

Your eyes traveled around the room, looking for anything that could calm you down. There was a bottle of wine, but that would just make your hormones skyrocket more than they already were since you were still as drunk as ever from earlier. There was Joe’s stash of edibles, but that would probably make you even more horny. You let out a shaky breath as your eyes moved to the bathroom, an obvious reliever right in front of you the whole time.

“Cold shower, obviously,” you sighed as you quickly got up and walked into the bathroom. 

Meanwhile, Joe was struggling too. Even though it was his idea, it wasn’t being executed successfully. The tent in his pants and the need to feel your lips around him were strong. He refused to get off on his own, so now he was stuck sitting on the bed and staring up at the blank ceiling, wondering if he should cave and go back to your shared room and finish what you started.

“Nope. Not happening,” Joe said as he sat up and shook his head. “I’m marrying her tomorrow, I can wait,” he assured himself.   

Joe was so serious about marrying you tomorrow even if you didn’t believe him, he could wait any longer to fully make you his even though you had only been engaged for a month. He didn’t care that it was going to happen in Vegas or that no family would be here. It would be much more special and intimate if it was just the two of you and truthfully, that was all he wanted. He was down for a big ceremony and party, but as someone who didn’t enjoy big crowds and all eyes being on him (even though he played football in front of 50,000+ fans every week), he would rather do something like this. Plus, something about getting married secretly in Las Vegas at a small chapel was giving him an adrenaline rush; it sounded like much more fun than standing in a big hall in front of hundreds of people who had their eyes glued on him. This way, it was just the two of you.  

You were his dream girl and were finally about to be his forever girl. He couldn’t wait to stand across from his girl at the altar and recite the vows, say the things he needed to say and kiss his wife for the first time. 

He laid back down on the bed, smiling as he imagined what your married life would look like. First, he needed to plan your honeymoon with you. You both had 2 places in mind–Porotifno, Italy, and St. Barths–and since you were having 2 weddings you’d also have 2 honeymoons which meant you could go to both places instead of having to pick one. He couldn’t wait to travel with you more, especially around the world now that he had moved on from his whole ‘I hate traveling’ shtick. There was a whole lot of world out there to see and he couldn’t have asked for a better person to see it with him. Another thing he couldn’t wait to do with you was have kids. Although that was still a few years down the road, he was so excited to watch you grow his child inside your belly. He was so excited to grow his family with you. 

Another thing he was looking forward to was all of your ‘firsts’ as a married couple. The first time you have sex as a married couple, your first vacation, your first big purchase together, your first husband/wife date, your first anniversary, your first Christmas, your first Valentine’s Day, and your first baby together. 

It was all he could think about as he drifted off to sleep with a huge smile plastered on his face. He thought his life up until he met you had been perfect and like a dream–a solid college football career and successful NFL career plus the fame and attention that came with it–but his future with you was even more promising and fulfilling than all of it. 

You were more fulfilling than anything he had in his life. 

The Next Night – STK Steakhouse – Las Vegas, Nevada 

“Ooo, Joe you have to try this Crab Cake,” you chewed as you covered your mouth and handed him a crab cake. “I feel like I’m eating gold right now,”.

“Considering this is one of the most expensive and highly rated restaurants in Vegas, I would expect no less,” he smiled as he took the crab cake and took a big bite, a groan leaving his lips as the bundle of flavors exploded in his mouth. “Holy shit, this is actually amazing,”. 

“I told you,” you giggled while you bumped his leg with yours, then reached for your wine and took a small sip to wash down your food as you were wrapping up dinner. He had brought you out on a date tonight to one of the best restaurants in Vegas, even going so far as renting a private room for you both so you could enjoy the night in private. You weren’t exactly sure why since eating in public was never an issue before, but you decided to let it go. 

The day had passed by pretty quickly up until now as you both kept yourselves busy by relaxing by the pool together and soaking up the sun, Joe didn’t mention his marriage idea at all the entire time which wasn’t surprising for you. You knew that was just one of his drunken words that had no real meaning behind them, so him forgetting about what he said last night wasn’t a big deal. Although it was weird he wasn’t confused when he woke up in a different bedroom in the morning since he seemingly forgot the marriage talk which is how he ended up in that room because of how drunk he was, but you also let that go. 

“You think we’re all done? Or did you want to stay for a little longer,” Joe asked, praying you said that you were good to go so he wouldn’t be late for the time he booked your wedding for. 

Yeah, wedding. 

He didn’t forget. He just decided to keep quiet the whole day so that this moment would be way more memorable. While you were taking a dip in the pool, he found a little classic Vegas chapel down the street from the restaurant he was taking you for dinner and booked a little private ceremony for tonight. All while you were blissfully unaware that this was your last few hours as his fiancee. 

“Uhh, I think so,” you nodded as you looked around. “I’m stuffed and probably would throw up if we ordered dessert,” you laughed. 

“Okay, cool,” he nodded, rubbing his sweaty palms on his thighs as he took a deep breath.

“But don’t you think it’s a little early to head back? Or did you have something else planned for our little date night since you think absolutely everything through ahead of time,” you said while putting your elbows on the table resting your chin on your knuckles, and looking at him with pure love.

“We’re not heading back,” Joe said matter-of-factly.

“Where are we going then?” you said while raising an eyebrow. 

Joe let out a little laugh as a song lyric from The Dixie Cups entered his head, “Because we're, going to the chapel, and we're gonna get married,” he sing-songed while moving his shoulders back and forth as he pretended to dance around. 

You stared at him for a few seconds, your face not changing as you expected him to say he was just kidding since you two were not that drunk like you were last night for him to be talking like this. 

“W- wait, you’re serious?” you said as you sat up after he didn’t say anything else.

“Run away with me, Y/N,” Joe blurted out as he lost the lighthearted tone in his voice and became serious. “Marry me, right here, right now,”.

Your heart was pounding in your chest and a wave of reality hit you like a brick. He wanted to marry you right now. Like right now. 

“I know it’s not what we planned, but I can’t wait anymore. I know you’re the one and I need to make it officially official, the ring is a great reminder but I want to make you the one for real,” he said as he grabbed your hand, his thumb grazing over your engagement ring. “I booked us a time slot at that chapel down the street. We can go right now, just say the word,”.

You felt your eyes well with tears, he was serious about it. You knew that you were getting married to him now that you were engaged, but the fact that it was this close to actually happening was making your heart stop. You didn’t realize you were really crying until you felt his thumb wiping the falling tears. 

“I didn’t mean to make you cry, baby,” he softly said while cupping your cheek. “If this is too much too fast, I can cancel. I can wait,” he lied. He couldn’t wait, who was he kidding? But if this was too much for you, he could make himself wait. He would do anything for you. 

“I- I thought you were drunk last night and that’s why you said that,” you sniffled. 

“Drunken words are sober thoughts,” he smiled. “I was being serious,”. 

“Y- you really want to marry me right now?” you said while meeting his gentle eyes.

“I’ve never wanted to do something so bad in my entire life,” he said.

“But what about our friends and family? Shouldn’t we wait for our parents? Shouldn’t we talk to them?” you said while placing a hand on top of his.

“Actually, I want it to just be you and me as cliche as it sounds. It’s always been you and me and it’s always going to be you and me, Y/N. You are the most important person in the world to me, I just need you there. I want this moment just for us,” he said while picking up your hand and planting a gentle kiss on it. “We can still have our big wedding in July with everyone like we thought about, but I want this to just be for us. But only if you want that too,” he said while looking down at your ring.

You stayed silent while you thought over it, “He’s thought it all through. He’s thought everything through from the first time we met, to our first date, to our first time, to the proposal, and now this. Whenever Joe set his mind on doing something, he always did it. Whether that was convincing me to go out with him or wanting to make me his forever, he did it. He wanted this with me. He’s always wanted this with me,”. 

“Okay,” you breathed out, a thrill shooting up your spine at the thought of marrying Joe in secret.  

“What?” Joe said while he looked back up.

“Okay,” you smiled again. “I don’t care how we get married, Joey. I’ll marry you in secret, I’ll marry you in front of a thousand people, I’ll marry you on top of the Empire State Building, I’ll marry you drunk, high, naked, you name it. I’ll run away with you,”.

“You’re serious?” Joe asked, his body perking up. “Because if this is a joke, it’s not funny…like I will not forgive you if this is a jo-....,”.

“I’m serious, Joe,” you said as you interrupted his nervous rambling. “Let’s go get married,” you said while pulling his head closer to yours by the nape of his neck. 

Joe bit his bottom lip as a blush grew on his face, “I love you, Y/N. You have no idea how happy you make me,” he said while he rested his forehead against yours.

“I love you endlessly, Joe,” you smiled before you tilted your head to press an expressive kiss to his lips. 

“Let’s go get married,” you said against his lips when you pulled away. 

“Let’s go get married,” he softly chuckled, quickly sliding out of the booth and pulling you out with him, his hand holding onto yours tightly. 

He pulled you out of the private room with speed, both of you flying through the crowded dining room while you quickly dodged the waiters and servers. “Joe,” you laughed. “Slow down,”.

“Nope. I have to get us there before you change your mind,” he joked while he glanced back at you.

“Well if that’s the case, then the clock is ticking, Burrow,” you teased as you made it to the front door of the restaurant. 

“Fuck, I didn’t call an Uber,” he realized as he stopped you both before you walked out onto the street. 

“You said it’s down the street right? We can walk,” you suggested. 

“Are you sure? Won’t your feet hurt?” he asked as he inspected your burgundy heel boots. 

“Probably, but it’ll all be worth it in the end,” you said while opening the door and pulling him out onto the street, the fresh breeze taking all of your worries away.

“Okay,” he laughed, the adorable crinkles around his eyes showing up as he tightly held onto your hand again and pulled you down the street. You felt like it was the early days in your relationship again with the way you were sneaking around. In the past, it was sneaking around together to keep your relationship on the low for a little, but now it was sneaking around to get married without anyone knowing. It’s funny how everything had changed in the blink of a crinkling eye.

You were only a few more blocks away from the little chapel before you stopped in your tracks, Joe feeling a tug on his hand and looking back at you. “What’s wrong?”.

“I don’t have a white dress on,” you said while looking down at your black mini-dress. “I can’t get married without a white dress,”.

“Well, I don’t think we’re going to have time to go dress shopping,” Joe laughed. 

“Mmm,” you hummed while looking around the street. “Oh, look,” you said while pointing over at the boutique across the street. “I could find a basic white mini dress in there,” you looked over at him and said. 

Joe looked down at his watch, seeing that you had a few minutes to spare. “I think we have time,”. 

“Okay, good,” you breathed out. “I’ll go, you stay here,”.

“Okay,” he eagerly nodded, feeling you let go of his hand before quickly walking across the street, your sense of urgency making him feel like he was on top of the world. You really wanted this just as bad as he did. 

When you walked into the store, you quickly glanced around to spot a white dress, the store owner noticed your frantic state and spoke up. “Can I help you, young lady?” she asked. 

“Yes, actually,” you said while walking over to the front desk. “I need a white dress,”. 

Her eyes landed on the massive rock on your ringer finger, then broke out into a huge fit of laughter after you said that. “Ohhhh, Stacy owes me $20,” she laughed.

“Excuse me?” you questioned her strange behavior.

“Oh, sorry sweetie. It’s just comical,” she said while getting up and motioning for you to follow her.

“What’s funny?” you asked as you followed her to the back of the store, your eyes widening once you got closer to the wall of white mini-dresses, white heels, and veils. “Holy shit,” you mumbled. 

“You’re surprised? You can’t expect a boutique to be this close to the little chapel and not be stocked up with wedding wear,” she laughed. “You aren’t the first girl to run in here in search of a white dress,”. 

“Clearly,” you said as you walked closer to the display, your eyes looking over the variety of dresses and heels. 

“Stacy, my employee, owes me $20 because she said we weren’t going to get a bride-to-be in the store today,” she said.

“And then I walked in,” you blushed as your eyes instantly landed on the perfect, simple yet glamorous, white mini dress. 

“You sure did,” she smiled as she walked over next to you. “You like this one?” she asked after she saw the spark in your eyes.

“I love it,” you whispered. 

“Oh, here honey,” she said as she spotted a pair of heels that went with the dress. “These go great together,”. 

You looked over at the beautiful pair of white jeweled heels which had flimsy soft white bows tied to the clasps. “This is perfect,” you smiled over at her. 

“Oh my goodness, it has a matching veil too!” she clapped her hands together and grinned before she brought over a delicate shoulder-length veil. 

“Thank you, so so so much,” you smiled as you grabbed the simple yet flawless veil. 

“My pleasure,” she nodded. “Now hurry, let’s get you checked out so that the groom isn’t kept waiting too long,” she laughed as you scurried back over to the front desk. 

“Good idea,” you giggled. “I think if I made him wait any longer, he’d drag me out of the store himself,”.

“Tell me about him,” she said while she quickly started scanning everything. 

“Where do I even start,” you grinned as you looked out the store window and saw Joe rocking back and forth on his feet, the biggest smile you had ever seen on his face.

“He’s my everything. My whole world in the form of a person. He’s the biggest sweetheart I’ve ever met and has shown me a kind of love I never thought I’d ever have. I don’t think I really knew what love felt like until I met Joe. I honestly don’t think I even knew what truly living life felt like before I met him. He keeps me on my toes, acts like my safety net when things get too chaotic, and is the one thing I physically can’t live without,” you blushed as you looked back over at the lady, who was holding a bag with all your things in it. “Oh, you’re fast with it,” you giggled while handing her your card. 

“Well, as I said, you’re not the first bride to run into the store for wedding wear,” she winked, noticing the spark behind your eyes after you finished talking about Joe.

“Yeah,” you laughed as you took the bag. 

“But he sounds like a wonderful man, sweetie. A word of advice, hold onto that love for as long as you can and never let it fade no matter what happens. That spark behind your eyes only comes around so often, it’s rare,” she told you. 

“Thank you, I will,” you nodded. “I appreciate your help tonight,”.

“It’s my pleasure, dear. Enjoy your married life, I wish you the best,” she waved over at Joe through the window before looking back at you. “He looks and sounds like a keeper, hold onto him forever,”. 

“Oh trust me, I will,” you said before thanking her again, then swiftly exiting the boutique and joining Joe back across the street. 

“We good now?” he asked as he grabbed your hand and entwined your fingers again. 

“Yes, Mr. Burrow,” you giggled while leaning up to kiss his cheek.

“Okay, Ms. Y/LN, I think we have a wedding to get to,” he grinned before pulling you down the street again, another soft laugh falling from your lips as another wave of reality came over you. Your whole future was in front of you, right at your fingertips. 

About an hour later

You both were inside the chapel and had finished filling out the paperwork that they needed to approve the marriage license–which apparently needed 90 days to be approved but one mention of Joe’s status changed that pretty quickly. 

Joe was already wearing a black dress shirt and formal-ish pants, so they just gave him a bowtie to finish it off. You two had also decided to keep the custom, special vows for your big wedding so you’d be sticking to the classic ones for tonight. 

After slipping on your dress, heels, and veil, you were standing in front of the mirror and holding your bouquet of white roses. You were thinking about how your life was about to change in a matter of minutes and you still couldn’t quite believe it, you were about to become his wife. 

Joe was about to become your husband. 

You felt your nerves settling in when you looked down at the ring on your finger, inhaling a few deep breaths to compose yourself. “It’s okay, I’m okay,” you told yourself out loud. “This is my wedding. That’s my husband. This is it,” you continued. 

“Y/N, we’re ready,” Vanessa, one of the chapel’s bridal assistants smiled as she entered the room which snapped you out of your daze. 

You took a few more seconds to collect yourself, “Okay,” you breathed out. “Here we go, Y/N. This is what you’ve been waiting for since the day you met Joe,” you thought to yourself before turning around, hearing the soft tune of the music fill the air as you walked through the curtain and made it to the aisle. 

Your breath hitched in your throat as you saw Joe standing at the altar with the officiant, his eyes widening once he saw you in your white dress–you looked like an angel. “Oh shit,” he whispered to himself. 

“Fuck,” you mumbled under your breath as you started to walk down the aisle, all your nerves disappearing once you see Joe mouth ‘I love you’ to you. 

You finished walking down the aisle and placed the bouquet down on one of the benches in front of you before you took your place across from Joe. 

“You look beautiful, Y/N,” Joe mouthed to you, his heart soaring at the sight of you in a veil and a white dress, only imagining how he’d feel when you’re in your real wedding dress in a few months.

“Not too bad yourself, Burrow,” you mouthed back before you heard the officiant clear his throat. 

“Welcome, everyone. We are gathered here today to witness and celebrate the union of Y/N and Joe, two hearts and souls in marriage. This is a day of great joy, for we have come together to recognize the tremendous love and commitment these two share,” he said. 

“Today, we stand together to witness a love story that has been written in the stars, a story that has brought us all here to celebrate the union of two souls who have found their forever in each other. As we gather in this moment, we are reminded that love is not just a feeling but a journey—one filled with laughter, challenges, and countless memories that shape who we are. Today is the beginning of a new chapter, one where two hearts, once separate, now beat as one. It’s a day when promises are made, not just with words but with the deepest parts of our hearts. May this day be a reflection of the love and commitment you share, and may it be the foundation of a marriage filled with joy, compassion, and endless adventures. So, let us celebrate this momentous occasion, as you embark on this incredible journey of life together. Here's to love, laughter, and a lifetime of happiness," he added, the sweet opening remarks making you and Joe both get a little misty-eyed.

“Joe, Y/N, do you stand here today with the intention to be each other’s partner, rock, and best friend for all the days of your lives?” he asked.

You and Joe both looked back at each other, joining your hands together and saying, “We Do,” in unison. 

“Will you love and honor each other as husband and wife for the rest of your lives?” he asked.

“We will,” you both smiled in unison again, Joe giving you a gentle squeeze in return. 

“Joe, do you take Y/N to be your lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold from this day forward, For better, for worse, For richer, for poorer, In sickness and in health, To love and to cherish, Till death do you part?” he asked, both your hearts about to beat out of your chest. 

“I, do,” Joe nods as he tries to hold back his tears, giving you another squeeze as you feel your heart explode.

“Y/N, do you take Joe to be your lawfully wedded husband? To have and to hold from this day forward, For better, for worse, For richer, for poorer, In sickness and in health, To love and to cherish, Till death do you part?”.

“I, do,” you answer, goosebumps rising on your skin as you feel the room get 10 times brighter. 

“It is my great pleasure to now pronounce you both husband and wife. Joe, you may kiss the bride,” he said. 

Joe quickly pulled you into him and captured your lips in a passion-filled, needy kiss; one that said everything without saying anything. 

You were finally his. You were finally the one. 

His hands settled on your waist before one slowly slid up your back while you looped your arms around his neck and pulled his face closer to deepen the kiss, your lips moving against each other in a familiar dance. After a few heated seconds, you felt him bite down on your bottom lip when you threaded your fingers through his curls, a sound leaving your lips that immediately made you pull away out of sheer embarrassment. 

“Oh my god,” you giggled as he rested his forehead against yours. 

“Damn, wait till we’re back at the hotel, Mrs. Burrow,” he grinned, watching a blush rise on your face after referring to you as his wife.

“Sorry, I can’t help myself, Mr. Burrow,” you teased while nuzzling your nose against his. 

“I can’t believe we did that,” Joe laughed. “We’re crazy,”.

“The craziest,” you agreed. “But I’m glad we did. It was just you and me like it was supposed to be,”.

It was just the two of you, and that made Joe the happiest man on the planet. Nobody could ruin this moment. 

“I love you, Y/N,” he choked out—high on emotions—before pulling you in for a hug. “I love you so much and I can’t wait to show you how much I do for the rest of our lives,”.

You felt the tears coming back when he squeezed you, the tone of his voice enough to make you want to break down into tears. “I love you, Joe. Thank you for being the one,”. 

“No, thank you,” he corrected before pulling away. “Your name was unwillingly carved into my heart since the moment I saw you. Thank you for letting me carve mine into yours,”.

“I didn’t need to let you, Joe. You won my heart over the moment you asked me out on a date” you grinned. 

“I didn’t, but we could go back and forth on this for hours,” he laughed as he grabbed your hand. 

“That’s debatable, babe, but I’ll let it go for tonight,” you chuckled while dropping your head on your shoulder.

God, Joe could never get tired of hearing that adorable laughter. And now he’d get to hear it for the rest of his life. “You ready to be a Wife?” he asked as you felt him press a kiss to your hair.

“Mhmmmm,” you grinned while turning your head to look up at him.

“You ready to be a Husband?” you asked while kissing his neck.

“Mhmmmm,” he hummed while dropping his hands to your ass, giving it a gentle squeeze that made a twinge of arousal shoot up your spine. “You wanna get out of here?” he whispered in your ears. “I think it’s time for us to consummate the marriage, my lovely and sexy Wife”.

“You’ve been watching way too much Bridgerton with me,” you shook your head as you pulled away and looked up at him, his heated gaze making you feel naked even though you were fully clothed. 

“But yeah, let’s go, my handsome and precious Husband,”.

–To Be Continued–

[everythingne]

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ ➛ double gold - gr63

the most undescreet mercedes fan makes her way to the olympics for team usa. people very quickly learn why she's very unhinged about her love for all things mercedes.

george russell x usa gymnast!reader / fc: suni lee

warnings/notes: reader is mentioned to have had kidney disease in the past/going through dialysis (shout out suni lee my WIFE) everytime i write a george win he either dnfs or disqualifies. i should stop. i also made this SO FAST. ignore any formatting mistakes.

liked by lilymhe, teamusa, alexalbon and others...

uruser: represented my team (USA) and my team (merc) and then promptly fell asleep on the bus bc my awe of being here is too much for my little brain :(

tagged: mercedesamg, teamusa, and two others...

lilymhe: literally boarding my flighttt !!! im so so proud see u soon !

⤷ uruser: pls tell me you stole alex's hoodie for me...

⤷ lilymhe: he'll never know

⤷ alexalbon: these are PUBLIC comments.

user1: every once and a while i forget lily is not only dating an f1 driver, but her cousin is literally an OLYMPIC FUCKING GYMNAST?

alexalbon: SO PROUD WE WILL SEE U AFTER THE GP!!

logansargeant: i love knowing one of the powerhouses the us sends to the olympics

⤷ uruser: aweeee love u too logannn <3 (US PRIDE THIS WEEKEND BITCH U BETTER NOT FINISH LAST)

⤷ logansargeant: yes ma'am i will make u proud

user2: good luck !!

user3: MAKING THE USA PROUD ONE NAP AT A TIME

mercedesamg: we love our biggest supporter <3

⤷ uruser: i love YOU mercedes

georgerussell: best of luck yn :)!!

⤷ uruser: thanks georgie :D!

⤷ alexalbon: hello?? what is this??

⤷ lilymhe: eyeing you russell

⤷ georgerussell: literally what have i done wrong

⤷ landonorris: nah you cant flirt with his future in laws

⤷ georgerussell: if saying good luck is flirting, i have news for everyone.

liked by logansargeant, simonebiles, teamusa, and others...

uruser: talked about it in an interview, but i struggled with my blood pressure all day. i've been lightheaded, swollen, and exhausted, but i did it. we fought through it, and ur girl is moving to finals!!

tagged: gk, teamusa

georgerussell: incredible work today !

⤷ landonorris: rooting for the enemy i see

⤷ uruser: thank you george <3

teamusa: that's our girl!!

user: so proud of u as a fellow kidney disease survivor <3

user1: girl had a bp of 140 and still beat like everyone. my fucking queen.

alexalbon: ez work queen get back to training

uruser: yessir

lilymhe: get ur meds and take it easy!! love uuu see u for dinner <3

landonorris: u make it look easy

uruser: trust. its so hard.

simonebiles: i dont know how you do it. ur so amazing.

⤷ uruser: coming from the goat herself ?!!!!

liked by uruser, susiewolff, alexalbon, and others...

georgerussell: left it all out on the track today. absolutely honored to do this a second time so soon.

tagged: mercedesamg, f1, barcelonagp

uruser: YAAAA GEORGIEEE!!! congrats!!!

⤷ georgerussell: thank u :)

user: GEORGE W!!!!

lewishamilton: amazing as always george. first half of the season crushed.

⤷ georgerussell: it's only up from here mate

simonebiles: the tears @ uruser shed for this win...

⤷ jordanchiles: we will finally get peace and quiet on weekends

⤷ uruser: shut up get a hobby both of you

alexalbon: incredible drive as always george

landonorris: ur so mean for not letting me pass :(

oscarpiastri: best fight of the season so far. looking forward to more.

⤷ georgerussell: hope to see you on that top step again mate

uruser: lets go george lets go george

⤷ georgerussell: my personal cheerleader <3

⤷ alexalbon: delete that heart or so help me god

liked by georgerussell, teamusa, simonebiles, and others...

uruser: this 'lazy' athlete skipped her dialysis today to win A FUCKING GOLD MEDAL!!!! YAAAAAA!!!! so so so proud of my girls for the team effort put together for this all around win. you are the greatest. (yes lily and alex, i am doing dialysis now.)

tagged: simonebiles, teamusa, jordanchile and others...

georgerussell: congratulations but please do your dialysis before alex finds out

⤷ uruser: its alright love, im all hooked up and dilating or whatever. thanks for the support as always russell <3

⤷ georgerussell: wow, no georgie?

⤷ uruser: gonna pout over it, honey?

⤷ user: is this not flirting?

alexalbon: YN. I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD.

user: SHE SKIPPED HER DIALYSIS FOR FLOOR??

⤷ user1: and they wouldn't move the schedule around her LIFE SAVING MEDICAL APPOINTMENT?

⤷ user2: no wonder the teamusa physicians grabbed her so quickly after the medal ceremony :(

alexalbon: DIALYSIS IS VERY IMPORTANT. IM GOING TO HIT WHOEVER SAID YOU COULDN'T DO IT.

⤷ uruser: IM DOING MY DIALYSIS RIGHT NOW WHY ARE YOU MORE STRESSED THAN LILY??

⤷ alexalbon: because YOU'RE A BABY

⤷ uruser: YOU ARE NOT THAT MUCH OLDER THAN ME FUCKER

lilymhe: alex is pacing but GREAT JOB BABYYYY YAAAYAYAYA SO PROUD OF UUU

user3: fire whoever had her SKIP MEDICAL TREATMENT.

liked by snoopdogg, usagymnastics, georgerussell, and more...

uruser: bronzed. sharing that podium with rebecca and simone is such an honor. up and up we go!! <3

tagged: simonebiles, teamusa, rebeccaandrade and more..

georgerussell: very deserved, as always

⤷ uruser: i swear ur obsessed w me (its ok just dont tell alex)

⤷ alexalbon: i'm starting to think none of you understand the concept of public comments

user: WELL DESERVED!!!

rebeccaandrade: você foi incrível!

⤷ uruser: obrigado! você também! (i hope thats right!)

⤷ user: YN LEARNING PORTUGUESE TO SPEAK WITH REBECCA HAS MY WHOOOLLLEEE HEARTTTT

landonorris: shiny !

logansargeant: AMERICAAA!!!!

⤷ uruser: RAAAHHH

liked by georgerussell, rebeccaandrade, lewishamilton, and others...

uruser: GOLD in beam. and y'all know how much beam and i fight. there are no amount of words to express the joy im feeling. wow. thanks to my lovely brit @ georgerussell for the support for his girlie across the pond <3

tagged: georgerussell, parisolympics, teamusa, and others...

alexalbon: i am so.

alexalbon: what the fuck?

⤷ user: LMAOOO

lilymhe: YAY!!! MY BABY DID ITTT!!! I UGLY SOBBEDDD AHAHA LOVE YOU SO MUCH BABES DINNER ON ME TNNN!!!

user1: george!!!!!! GEOOORRRGEEE!!

alexalbon: GEORGE???

⤷ uruser: was me liking mercedes a weird amount not enough of a hint for you?

georgerussell: so proud of you sunshine <3

⤷ uruser: love u georgie

⤷ landonorris: gross get a room (jk. very proud george got a girl just as talented as himself)

⤷ georgerussell: wow a rare lando compliment. i will cherish it for years to come.

⤷ landonorris: fuck you im never complimenting you again

lewishamilton: congratulations!! hope to see you in the paddocks soon in some merc gear this time

⤷ mercedesamg: oh we can handle that

⤷ williamsracing: you can pry yn from our cold dead hands

⤷ mercedesamg: babes. im gonna hold your hand when i say this williams, you've lost in the public eye after ur stunt with logan. we win yn in the divorce.

⤷ uruser: YEAH IM ON LOGANS SIDE DAMNIT!!! AMERICANS STICK TOGETHER!!

⤷ logansargeant: true patriot right here

georgerussell: still in AWE of my gf being a TWO TIME OLYMPIC AA GOLD MEDALIST

⤷ uruser: my boyfriend is a FORMULA ONE DRIVER. how fucking cool is that!???

⤷ georgerussell: cool enough for you to go to dinner with me?

⤷ uruser: always

⤷ lilymhe: they grow up so fast

alexalbon: GEORGE WILLIAM RUSSELL?

tag list for all works (open!)

@d3kstar (i hope ur tag works this time lovely!)

[lincolndjarin]

Not So Secret Santa

javier peña x fem!reader

this is a part of the @pedrostories gift exchange!!

summary : you get the only person you didn't want for your offices secret santa.

warnings/tags : 18+ mdni, enemies/friends to lovers, canon divergence, steve is your boss/close friend, reader and javier have a complicated relationship, reader is insecure, brief mentions of alcohol, porn with plot, smut, light angst, javier and reader fight physically but it's very light with no actual injury, masturbation, semi-public sex, p in v, idk how to properly tag this but javi likes boobs in this so he touches boobs, unprotected sex (don't do this, wrap it this holiday season), use of a makeshift gag, rough yet very loving sex because it's christmas and christmas magic means i can write what i want.

tldr : you and javi have sex in his office and you put his tie in his mouth to shut him up.

word count : 4.4k

✦ : merry christmas @taro-666 !!! i'm your secret santa !!! i hope you're well this holiday season and i hope you enjoy this fic !! i haven't written much peña, despite how much i love him so i hope i did him justice and i hope you have a wonderful holiday <3 <3 (also sorry this is a little late (20 minuetes left before midnight so we're good). i was out with family all day and was only just now able to get to my laptop, i promise i didn't forget about you lmao)

no use of y/n, reader has hair and painted nails & javier sort of half picks her up at one point, nothing else is described besides clothing.

lovely dividers by @saradika-graphics

“Please, Steve, I’ll give you a week's pay.” You lean across his desk, genuine desperation in your voice after an hour of begging. 

“Not gonna happen.” He doesn’t even bother looking up from his computer.

“A month.” Your voice is starting to pitch up, something similar to anguish in your tone. Your offer finally gets a reaction out of him as his eyes widen, head tilting up.  

“Jesus, you can’t be serious.” He’s examining your expression, trying to determine the sincerity of your claim. 

“My entire Christmas bonus.” 

“Okay, stop.” He sighs, giving you a sympathetic look. “We’re not allowed to switch.”

“When did you become such a stickler for the rules?” You cross your arms in front of your chest. 

“It’s just a secret Santa. He’s our friend, whether you like it or not, you two are close and this shouldn’t be this big of a deal, now go, please, I need to finish up here so I can leave at a reasonable hour.” He loosens his tie as you sigh. 

“It’s not just a secret Santa, Steve. It’s an opportunity for him to tell me that I once again didn’t do something right. No matter what I get him, it isn’t going to be good enough.” Even as you’re saying it you can see that he isn’t going to change his mind about this. 

“He’s a dick to everybody. That’s inevitable, it just means he’s comfortable with you.” He’s already turning back to his work. 

“Please, Steve.” 

“No.”

You glare down at him, giving him your angriest look as his gaze tilts back up to meet yours. 

When it’s clear that he isn’t going to switch you turn and leave, slamming his office door in the process. 

“Don’t forget, I need you here early to help set up for the party!” His muffled voice seeps out into the hall as you walk away. 

Once you’re out in your car and far away from prying eyes you unfold the damned slip of paper you’d drawn earlier today. 

Javier P. 

Of course, you got stuck with fucking Peña, a nickname you’d given him a few months ago. He absolutely hates it but the entire time you’ve worked for the DEA he’s gone out of his way to bother you. Sure, he’s your “friend”, in a strange, complicated way. But he still drives you up the wall with his constant need to one up you and the way he’s constantly making passes at women around the office. 

And it’s not like you have any problems with him sleeping around, lord knows you’ve had a fair amount of one night stands, but he just has to hit on every woman you work with. 

Every single woman, except you. 

You’d never admit it of course but a part of you will always be self conscious about that fact. It doesn’t help that Javier absolutely adores bothering you at every possible moment. He loves nothing more than to pester, annoy, and mock you, spending nearly half his day leaning over your desk despite the million complaints you’ve sent Steve about his persistent partner. 

He’ll sit on your desk, doing an endless amount of things to cause you distress. Like crowding you with his cigarette smell and vanilla cologne as he tells you you’re filling papers wrong, or telling you what colors to paint your nails, or solving your cases before you can even get to them, or teasing you about your shitty car. Today he wouldn’t stop bothering you about your weekend plans like he doesn’t already know exactly where you’ll be. 

“Are you doing anything this weekend?” He’d asked with that devastating smirk and eyebrow raise combo. 

“I have to go buy my secret Santa gift, just like everyone else.” You’d turned away, avoiding eye contact as he scoffed. 

“What about Saturday?” He continued to pry, you wanted nothing more than to shove his perfect ass off your desk. 

“The Christmas party, Javi. Just like everyone else.” You had sighed, squeezing the bridge of your nose as Emilia had walked past your desk. Javier immediately forgot your entire conversation as he turned to her. 

“I love your nails.” He’d pushed his hair out of his face, holding his hand out to take hers, getting a closer look at the well manicured designs. 

You had tuned out after that. Not wanting to be involved in the exchange as you went back to typing. Acutely aware of your own nails. 

Red chipped paint. 

You couldn’t help but wonder what it must be like to be the object of his affection.

It wouldn’t matter if he did hit on you, you would probably reject him anyway. 

Probably. 

It doesn’t matter, it’s never gonna happen so why let it bother you? 

With a sigh you toss the paper into your cup holder, reaching to turn on the radio, maybe some Christmas music will make you feel better. Of course nothing happens as you turn up the volume knob but it makes you want to scream regardless. 

Stupid fucking Peña. 

Stupid broken radio, stupid shitty car. 

“Fuck.” You mumble under your breath as you shift into drive.

Before you know it you’re back in your car in the DEA office parking lot, this time a few things are different though. 

You’re dressed nicer, trading your slacks in for a skirt and your dress shirt for a sweater. And of course you now have a small wrapped box in your lap. 

Since you had yesterday off for the holiday you spent your Friday at the mall, searching for a gift for Javier. Eventually you had settled on three little things; Nicotine gum, mostly because you’ll get more work done if he isn’t constantly dragging you outside for his smoke breaks. He complains too much about going alone and it’s always been easier not to argue, now he can stay at your desk with his gum. Beard oil, the fancy stuff he always insists on using in his mustache. You’d bought him the wrong kind last year for his birthday and you still haven’t heard the end of it. And a lighter, you had to beg the shop owner to make an exception and do a same day engraving of his birthday. 

Jesus. 

You know way too much about him. 

You arrived two hours early as requested by Steve to help him set up. With the wrapped box tucked under your arm you anxiously tap the patterned wrapping paper with your freshly manicured nails. 

“You should paint your nails green, I love green.” He had said through a drag of his cigarette. 

Why did you let that idiot's opinions influence this decision? You feel foolish. The green chrome polish shimmering in the street lights in the parking lot as you step into the building. You had extra time while you were waiting for the engraving and you just couldn’t help yourself when the salon was just a few stores away. The image of Javier holding your hand and examining your painted nails while telling you how nice they looked was just too tempting. Maybe he’d even ask if you did it just for him, and you could drag him into a closet at the party, the exact situation you watched unfold last year. Except in that scenario you weren’t the lucky lady he’d run off with that night. 

There’s no time to be thinking like that.

You shake off whatever filth you were imagining as you look around the hectic mess of garland and glitter.

Steve is already stressing, setting up tables as you set your gift under the tree before getting to work. The office is already mostly decorated but with his new position as supervisor Steve is insistent that everything be perfect his first Christmas in charge. So you plate food, and you mix drinks exactly as he wants them, and you hold the ladder steady when he insists on putting more lights up. When you’ve got about a half an hour before guests start arriving you’re finishing up and last minute touches, the two of you crowded around a drink tower. 

The tension from your conversation yesterday seems to have fizzled out as you become engrossed in your work, when you’ve both finished he gives you an appreciative look.

“Thank you, seriously, it means a lot.” You help him adjust his tie as he straightens out his shirt. 

“Anytime, although I’m surprised you didn’t just ask Javier.” You pat his shoulder as you finish, brushing a stray blonde hair out of his eyes. 

He laughs, a nervous chuckle that makes you raise an eyebrow but when you open your mouth to comment on it he lets out a relieved sigh as the first of your coworkers arrive.

More people show up than you could have expected. 

You stay near Steve for most of the beginning until he gets dragged away by one of the higher ups who had made an appearance, leaving you alone to sip your drink against the back wall. You hum along to a Christmas song that plays loud enough to drown out any conversation you might eavesdrop on to entertain yourself in his absence, your eyes scan the crowds as you try to match up the people you work with with their spouses. 

You’re getting ready to find another group to talk to when you catch a glimpse of him standing against the opposite wall, talking to Bonnie, the woman who works in the cubicle next to yours. 

Fucking Peña. Dressed in a stupidly tight green dress shirt. 

You should leave them alone, especially if he’s trying to make a move on her. But you can’t help it as you make your way around the room towards them, a vague sense of jealousy settling in your stomach. 

String lights twinkle across the ceiling of the office, creating a warm ambience throughout the space, just as you’re about to tap him on the shoulder you overhear their conversation. 

“I had to beg Steve to switch with me, took an hour of convincing and a week's paycheck but it’ll be worth it to see the look on her face.” His back is to you as he leans in closer to Bonnie. 

He’s probably talking about one of the other women from the office. Steve probably had someone Javier was trying to impress and that’s why Steve didn’t want to trade with you, he had already promised his pick to Javier. 

Whatever, you can’t be too bothered about that. It does make you want to return to your spot on the other side of the room but you don’t get the chance to as the music is turned down rather suddenly.

One of the secretaries, Benjamin, stands on a chair, making an announcement that it’s time to do the secret Santa. You manage to twist through the crowds so Javier never sees you, finding his gift and bringing it to where he now stands, simultaneously keeping an eye out for your own gift.  

You hand him the box, watching the way his face lights up. 

“You picked me?” He grins as you nod, carefully peeling back the wrapping paper as you feel a tap on your shoulder. Benjamin waits behind you, leaning in to whisper while you watch Javier open his gift. 

“It was short notice so we didn’t have time to get you a back up gift but your secret Santa told us at the last minute that he forgot to get you something, he promised to bring in something after New Years, I’m so sorry.” You feel a little disappointed as he murmurs but it isn’t that big of a deal, it’s a busy time of year and people can forget things. 

“No worries, do you know who it was? I’d like to at least tell them it’s fine.” You turn away from Javier as he smiles at the nicotine gum, Benjamin's eyes flicker from your face to Javier’s before he gives you a sympathetic look, walking away. 

Javier traded for your name? 

As your head tilts to look at him now you can see the smirk he’s now sporting. 

“ …but it’ll be worth it to see the look on her face.”

Javier had made a conscious effort to get your name just so he could not get you something.

Huh.

That doesn’t feel great. The look he gets to see on your face is betrayal and then just sadness. You don’t really care what the reason for his decision is, you turn and walk away from him regardless. If he tries to say something to you it’s drowned out by the music that starts once again. 

Why are you so upset over some stupid joke? If it had been anyone else you wouldn’t have cared, you’d have brushed it off as a harmless accident but this wasn’t an accident. 

Maybe he didn’t really think of you as a friend. 

Maybe all of the teasing and one-upmanship really was from a place of animosity and you were just too blind and too infatuated to see it. You want to cry but you don’t want to give him the satisfaction so you sift through the bowl of keys, searching for the Star Wars keychain attached to your lanyard but you can’t find it. The combination of the blaring Christmas songs with the frustration you’re currently feeling only makes you more emotional.  

You don’t want to go to the bathrooms where you might run into someone and you can’t go to Steve’s office because he might be talking to his supervisor, so you go to the only place you know there won’t be people. 

Javier’s office. 

You walk as quickly as you can, slipping inside as you slam the door shut behind you, clicking the lock in place before turning around, resting against the door as you feel tears spilling from your eyes. It isn’t until he clears his throat that your head snaps up.

Today is just not your day.

Did he know you’d come here? How the hell did he beat you here? He’s fidgeting with the lighter you bought him, watching it light and go out as he sits with your keys in his other hand. 

Your face feels hot as you take in the sight of him. 

“Give me my keys.” You hold your hand out, wiping your eyes with the other as you wait. Of course he doesn’t hand them over, that would be too easy and today is insisting on being difficult. 

“I really liked your gift. Seriously, this is… outrageously thoughtful.” He murmurs, seemingly unaware of your mood until he takes a closer look at you, his expression shifting as he realizes your eyes are rimmed with red. “Why are you so upset? What happened?” He slides open a drawer, tossing your keys into his desk while you consider calling a cab. 

What a foolish question. 

How could he possibly not know?

“I want to leave, I’m sick of this party.” You turn to leave, maybe Steve can drive you home. 

“Come on, the parties barely started.” He’s on his feet, he doesn’t try to corner you, if anything he sets himself against the wall. 

“And I want to leave.” When you reach for the doorknob he grabs your wrist, holding it as he stares at you, a look of impatience crosses his face. 

“Don’t tell me you’re mad about the secret Santa.” His brows furrow. 

“This isn’t about a stupid secret Santa.”

“It sure seems like it is.” He’s still holding your wrist, why is he still holding your wrist?  

This isn’t about the secret Santa. It’s a lot more than that, and after ages of keeping your thoughts to yourself in front of him you just let it out. 

“This is about the fact that you don’t even care about me enough to make any sort of effort. I know you deliberately chose me, you specifically chose to do this to me and I don’t care that it’s just a stupid prank. It still- It’s still a shitty thing to do.” Your voice starts cracking half way through and you can feel your eyes welling up again but it doesn’t matter anymore, you were wrong, the two of you aren’t friends. 

“So this is about the secret Santa.” 

Of course he wouldn’t get it. 

“You’re an idiot.” You finally pull your wrist from him. 

You aren’t sure what else to do so you shove him, his back hitting the wall with a soft thud as you push past him to get to his desk, hoping to grab your keys but he catches your waist first. 

“Can you stop being so stubborn for five seconds and just let me explain myself?” You can tell his patience is wearing thin, his voice is strained as he pulls you back against him, caging you against his chest with his arms. 

“Fuck Javi- let me go-” You try to kick his knees but he anticipates it, shifting his legs to avoid you.

“Just wait- listen to me.” He swings you around a bit as he tries to still you, you can feel his breath hitching, the buttons of his shirt digging into your back. The two of you thrash around for another moment until you freeze, feeling something poking your hip. When he realizes why you stopped putting up a fight he lets you go in an instant. “Shit- I-I’m sorry.” He stammers as you turn around towards him, eyes wide. 

You never thought you’d see Javier Peña flustered yet here he is. When you take a step back his cheeks are burning red, his fingers twitch nervously at his side, and as much as you try to ignore it, his pants are tighter than usual. (And considering how tight they usually are this is quite a feat.) He won’t look you in the eye. 

“It- It’s fine, Javi.” You adjust the hem of your skirt, trying to fix your hair. You just can’t catch a break today. “It was an accident, there was a lot of- of friction and it happens. I think I should just go.” You stutter a bit trying to find the right words. This entire evening has been catastrophic, and you’re more than ready to call it a night. 

“It’s not an accident.” He mumbles, finally looking at you, not bothering with subtlety as he adjusts himself. “You should probably go.” 

If it’s not an accident you don’t want to go. 

You want to stay and keep making accidents, starting with rushing forward into him, taking his face in your hands and kissing him. Which is exactly what you do. At first he doesn’t react and you worry you read the situation wrong but when you pull away, just an inch, his hands envelop you. 

Hips, waist, back, shoulders, hair. He’s everywhere, all consuming as his teeth graze your lips, in an instant your backside hits his desk.

When he finally does remove his lips from yours his are slick and a tiny bit swollen, his pupils swallow his irises whole. 

“I loved your gift, I wasn’t joking, it’s perfect and the last thing I want is for you to think that I don’t care about you. Of course we’re friends, you-” As he rambles on you ball up the end of his tie, unceremoniously shoving it between his teeth. 

“Talk later, this now.” You grab the bottom of your sweater, pulling it up over your head, watching his jaw tense at the sight of your chest, his hands playing with the strap of your bra as you hop up onto his desk. Hiking your skirt up, he slots himself between your legs, your own fingers push your panties to the side as he reaches behind you, easily twisting the clasp of your bra to release it, tossing it to the side as his enormous palms engulf your breasts. 

You dip your fingers into the wetness between your legs, briefly taking a moment to wonder how you found yourself here. Just moments ago you were ready to leave and consider your friendship with Javier over, yet now you’re spread out on his desk, on display for him as you sink your fingers into your eager cunt. 

You don’t get to linger on the thought for long because he groans into the fabric of his tie and you’re pulled back into the moment. 

Jesus you’re soaked. 

You have no trouble pushing two slick digits into yourself. You can feel the outline of him against your thigh and you know that you need to warm yourself up to take him. He’s too engrossed in your tits to do it right now and you’ve waited too long for this, you don’t want to wait, you just want to have him. 

He’s tender at first, squeezing and softly tracing the outline of your areola until he seemingly can’t control himself any longer and he pinches, rolling your nipples between his thumb and pointer finger as your whine. Back arching of the oak of his desk as you curl your own fingers. Even through the tie his moans are still somehow louder than yours, you’re briefly worried about someone hearing as you let out a whimper while he tweaks your nipple but the music’s so loud at the party you can hear Mariah Carey from here. 

You don’t stop for a second, putting your focus on reaching the peak that you find yourself already getting startlingly close to. You can feel yourself pulsing as you pick up the pace, reveling in the way his eyes devour the very sight of you. You’re agonizingly close when he grabs your wrist, removing your fingers carefully as you try and resist, wanting to finish what you started, you’re about to whine when he begins unzipping his pants. You can feel your pussy clenching at the very sight of him, of course he isn’t wearing any underwear under his dress pants so the second his zipper is fully down his cock springs free.

Javier fucking Peña has a gorgeous cock. 

Standing stiff and proud without either one of you even having to touch it. Pretty and pink on the tip, already leaking down the shaft. And heavy, as he takes it in his hand, his other hand gripping your waist as lines himself at your entrance. He takes a moment, eyes scanning your face, silently asking for permission. 

You can’t nod fast enough but the second that you do he slides into you. 

You could never conjure up something this good in your fantasies. The way he fills you, stretching you open as he whimpers into the fabric of his tie, you like that he listened, that he kept it in his mouth this long. His strokes are needy and fast, like he’s been waiting for this for so long and now he can’t help but be ravenous. You were already painfully close before he filled you with his perfect cock, it takes only a few minutes for you to be right back there. His fingers dig into your waist so hard that you’re certain he’ll leave marks as he slams in and out of you, pulling out almost entirely with every thrust. 

You’re vaguely aware of the sound of his trinkets rolling off his desk and onto the floor. 

“Javi, Javi, Javi.” Between gasps you chant his name, the sound encouraging him as he pushes in deep, his pelvis grinding against your clit until you see stars. Your cunt clenching around him as your orgasm is ripped out of you. Messy and loud and blurry, he fucks you through it. You’re so blissed out you can barely focus on the persistent pounding into you until you manage to come back to your senses and his hands leave your waist, instead intertwining with your fingers as his hips twitch forward and you feel him hastily pull out of you.

He spits his tie out, opting to instead bite your shoulder as he comes, the groan that leaves his throat is obscene. Raspy and filthy as he collapses down on top of you, the two of you sweating and gasping amongst the paperwork and pens now scattered across his desk. 

Did that really just happen?

He manages to collect himself first, leaning back and tucking himself into his pants before quickly tending to you. He grabs a few tissues, wiping your stomach where the product of your activities lay, before redressing you, slipping the flats that had slipped off, back onto your feet, pulling your skirt back down to cover you as he slides your panties back into place, and retrieving your bra and sweater, lifting you into a sitting position as he redresses you, kissing your cheeks, nose, and forehead the entire time. 

“All good?” He whispers, gentler than you’ve ever heard him as you nod, grinning. 

“Good enough to make me forgive you for not getting me a present.” You reach into his drawer, grabbing your keys before sliding off of his desk. 

“Maybe this was your present.” He tilts his head, kissing you again, smiling all the while. 

“That was the perfect gift then.” Probably the best you’ve ever gotten.

“Are you gonna stay for the rest of the party?” He takes your hands in his, his thumbs absentmindedly rubbing circles into your skin. 

“I think I need to go to bed after that.” You laugh as you jingle your keys, turning towards the door as he catches your lips in another kiss. 

It makes your heart flutter. The continued affection makes you think this isn’t a one time thing. You want more. You want conversations about feelings, and to talk about what just happened, you want to feel him inside you again, and the look in his eyes tells you that you’re going to get all of that. But right now you’re tired, so the rest can wait. 

“Can I walk you to your car?” You nod as he murmurs.

He doesn’t let go of your hand, walking you out of the building towards your car, opening the door for you and giving you one last kiss with a promise that he’d call you tomorrow, before you watched him walk back into the building.

Your phone buzzes as you turn your key in the ignition, the sound of Wham! fills the car, Last Christmas playing softly. You take your phone out of your pocket, checking the text notification from Javier. 

[ i forgot to tell you how pretty your nails are. merry christmas hermosa ]

Your head turns up in surprise as you realize your radio is working. A new radio system is installed in the center of your dashboard, with a little green bow taped to the top, and a paper tag with Javi’s familiar messy handwriting. 

from : your secret fucking santa

a/n : happy holidays everyone!!