#what about donna and rachel endgame

[twinklingchode]

good morning losers i’m marvey brain today

[jasntodds]

Caving In [10]

Pairing: Gar Logan x Fem!Powered!Reader, Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader

Words: 17,220 

Chapter Warnings: Swearing, fluff, canon typical things, canon violence, mentions of blood, mentions of injuries, angst, there’s a mention of dissociation in a nonchalant manner, a mention of drug addiction, reader and jason share 1 braincell while gar gets to have his own, it’s the start of the deathstroke chapters so lol, kidnapping

Summary: ❝Tell me Atlas: What is heavier, The world or its people’s hearts?❞ You never expected your life to end up this way, turned upside down by an infamous Gotham villain. It’s been a living hell, every single day, until Dick Grayson brings you to Titans tower where you meet Gar Logan and Jason Todd.

A/N: Should I tell you guys who the endgame is? lol Because I do know that and have it all plotted out lol I am easily motivated to post more often when I get feedback 😂 You can add yourself to the tag list below, ask me to be tagged, or you can follow my library blog @jasntoddslibrary​ and turn on notifications if you prefer that!!

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When Dick comes back to the tower, Rose is still with him. The four of you are collectively surprised until you find out it’s because there was a bomb in the jeep that almost killed the two of them. That’s a fair reason to have a second thought about staying at the tower. But, that brings up the perfect opportunity for you, Gar, and Jason to tell Dick about Deathstroke being Rose’s dad. Dick didn’t have a reaction you could read well but asked to see what you all found, completely choosing to ignore how you found out. That’s a discussion for another time.

In the comms lab, all of you gather around the computer where everything about Rose and Deathstroke is still pulled up for Dick to see.

“That’s Rose’s father?” Rachel asks.

“Yep. The one and only Deathstroke.” Jason’s voice has hints of amazement, the smallest of grins pulling at the left corner of his mouth. Of course, Jason would find it fascinating.

“Is that somebody you know?” Rachel asks, turning to look at Dick.

“Kind of, old Titans business.” Dick says, keeping a straight face and you raise your brows. Yeah, old Titans business as in he killed one of them.

“Check it,” Gar brings up another screen. “Former Delta Force Commando part of hive.” Gar says, the last part almost sounding like a question. “Select soldiers who underwent a series of experimental bio-enhancements.” Gar pauses for a second. “Huh, out of the thirty-five trial subjects, the only one to survive was Slade Wilson.” Gar pauses for another second reading the screen. “Interpol says he retired years ago after the death of his son, Jericho. I-I tried having the computer find something--”

“I’ll take it from here.” Dick cuts Gar off, walking over to him and exiting out of the screens with Rose and Slade.

All of the you watch him with suspension but before anyone can question him, the security alarm goes off. Dick pulls up the screen to the front door where three people are standing.

“So, I guess you changed the code.” The woman with dark hair says.

“Finally.” Rachel says, a large smile on display as she sounds relieved.

“Who’s here?” You ask, looking around the room, not able to see onto the smaller monitor in front of Dick.

“You’ll love them.” Rachel beams, walking over to you and grabbing your hand to pull you along. “Donna, Dawn, and Hank.” Rachel starts as the two of you walk down the hallway, the two boys right behind you. “Donna is Wondergirl.” Rachel starts.

“Sorry, what now? Wondergirl like THE Wondergirl?” Your voice raises, excitement flooding your tone.

“Yep! Dawn, the one with white hair, she’s Dove and Hank is Hawk.” Rachel explains.

“The original Titans, okay.” You nod your head and you are so excited.

The original Titans, that’s awesome, actually one of the coolest things that’s ever happened. They’re real superheroes and it’s Wondergirl. One of the coolest heroes ever. And to top it off, that means the tower is gaining two more women in the tower which is always a plus. Rachel and the boys, including Jason, actually seem really excited to see them which is all a good sign to you.

“You guys have no clue how much this place misses you.” Rachel says as she greets Dawn.

Dawn embraces her in a hug. “This place, huh?”

“Mostly just me.” Rachel says.

“And me, too.” Gar says before he gets his own hug from Dawn, you staying back and observing. It is weird that this is like a thing. They’re all…friends.

“Hey, you’re new.” Hank says from the back, looking behind Gar to you.

You nods. “I am.” You step forward awkwardly, Gar gesturing a hand out to introduce you.

“This is Y/n.” Gar beams.

“It’s nice to meet you, Y/n.” Dawn’s voice is sweet and soft. “I’m Dawn, he’s Hank, and that’s Donna.” She says as she jerks her head towards Donna who’s just finished giving Rachel a hug.

“You, too. Original Titans.” You say, a gleaming smile coming to your face. You’re nearly bouncing with excitement while trying not to make it seems obvious how cool this is.

“That’s us.” Hank says, a little exasperation in his voice. “Got any…talents we should know about?” Hank asks.

You hold your hands up, as if to be surrendering before your palms start glowing. That catches everyone’s attention. “Acid generation.”

“And combat clairvoyance.” Jason says from his spot near the fireplace. He doesn’t do the whole ‘welcome back’, ‘glad to see you again’ reunions even if he is glad to have them around.

“Well, alright then.” Hank nods, seeming to approve.

“Did Dick find you?” Dawn asks.

“He did.” You keep it short, not wanting to go over the play-by-play yet again.

“He has a thing for strays.” Donna says, giving you a quick smile.

“Noticed.” You laugh softly.

“Where’s Kory?” Rachel asks, looking to Donna.

You look to Gar for clarification. "The cool alien that sounds like a badass?"

"Yeah," Gar chuckles. "That's Kory.

Dick walks up from behind you and Gar, gaining the entire room’s attention. He asks if they were followed but it doesn’t seem like they were. You, Gar, Jason, and Rachel look around, confused by the question but none of you have the nerve to ask.

“Can you guys give us a minute, please?” Dick asks the four of you.

None of you question him and just do as he asks, Jason hanging back a second wanting to be involved but Dick asks him to leave, too. The four of you go off to your rooms to change for training practice. That’s more than likely what Dick wants you to do while he talks to the older Titans anyway. And it’s a pretty easy way to waste time as you wait for further information. So, you all get changed and head to the training room.

You run through a few drills before agreeing to start a sparring session the way Dick wants you to train. Blindfolds and wooden swords, preparing for the day someone tries to take your other senses from you. You have specific instructions to try and ignore the throbbing in the back of your head while you spar because ‘one day it may not be there and you shouldn’t rely on it’. You just roll your eyes whenever Dick says that. It always sounds so dumb even if he might be right. Whatever Jerry did to you, there isn’t any telling if it’s actually permanent. So, you do your best to ignore it.

The four of you get your blindfolds on, taking positions on the mat with your wooden swords and arm pads to protect yourselves. You stretch your shoulders while Gar hunkers towards the floor, Rachel moving her neck side to side and Jason preparing to attack the three of you. It’s never on purpose, but you do tend to gang up on him a little. Jason is just a force when sparring. It’s like the three of you don’t stand a great chance unless you end up working together. It’s never planned but it seems to always play out that way in the end, with you still usually losing.

“Ready?” Jason asks.

“Yep.” You say.

“Ready.” Rachel confirms.

“Let’s go.” Gar says, Gar and Jason the most serious sounding of the four of you.

Gar lunges forward first, his sword almost hitting Jason as Jason swings at Rachel. You swing your sword near Gar, tapping his arm. And the sparring begins. The throbbing in your head is annoying. It’s not painful but annoying. One of the good things about sparring with three people is everyone is fighting for their lives at the same time. You have a harder time figuring out where the throbbing is pointing in a situation like this because ignoring it isn’t exactly that easy.

When you’re just sparring with Jason or Gar, the throbbing is specifically located wherever they are. If they’re behind you, it’s in the very back of your head right at the base. But if they’re to the side, the throbbing switches and leans closer to whatever side they’re on. This is different though because all three of the others are coming from all different directions and it actually forces you to figure out where they are based on movement and the sounds they make, the sounds of their feet, the wooshing of the air. It’s not easy. The throbbing is still distracting.

Jason hits Gar in the back, sending him forward and in a quick motion, he gets you in the stomach, sending you right into Gar as you both fall to the ground. Before even taking a breath, Jason smacks Rachel in the head, sending her to the ground.

“Houston, we have contact!” Jason yells as he rips his blindfold off.

“You okay?” Gar asks as he takes his blindfold off, still on the floor with you.

“Yeah, you?” You ask, taking your own blindfold off only for you to see a cloud of black stringy smoke coming out of Rachel.

The two of you get to your feet, watching with a sense of worry and a touch of horror. You’ve never seen Rachel’s powers before but now you consider yourself lucky for that. You knew it was a little strange and it is dangerous. Rachel doesn't have much control over it and she tried to explain it to you in a little more detail but seeing it is a completely different story. It's a bit terrifying to say the least.

“Are we still sparring?” Jason asks, getting the sense that Rachel is definitely not sparring.

“That doesn’t look good.” You mutter to Gar. 

“Rachel?” Gar asks with caution but not daring to move toward her.

Rachel’s eyes glow red with the gem-like piece in the center of her forward while she gets to her feet and faces Jason. The slime-like sometimes surrounds her before she lunges forward and grabs Jason by the neck, levitating them both far above the ground. Gar and you watch in a sense of horror as the dark material circles Rachel and Jason.

“Rachel.” Jason chokes out.

Rachel looks to the side with the real swords, tilting them towards Jason. Your mouth falls open as you stand in a mix of panic and shock.

“What the fuck do we do? We have to do something!” You panic to Gar.

“I-I don’t know!” He says. “Um…shoot…acid at them, I guess?” The comment is more facetious than literal.

You narrow your eyes at him. “And make her more angry?!”

“Rachel stop!” Gar urges and that seemed to be all it takes.

Rachel’s eyes widen, the red fading immediately as she drops Jason to the floor. He lands hard on his back while Rachel lands easily on her feet. You immediately rushes over to Jason while Gar stands in the corner, almost too afraid to move from his spot. Jason brushes you off as he gets to his feet, storming over to Rachel.

“You stay away from me, you fucking freak.” Jason’s voice is ragged.

Rachel’s eyes are wide with the remark but you can’t exactly blame Jason. Rachel almost killed him. Just last night, the four of you were discussing if Rose should stay or she’d kill you all. But, Rachel, who does live here, actually did almost kill Jason. All you and Gar can do from your spots if give a wince.

“Everything okay?” Dick walks in just in time, seeing the four of you not looking so good.

Everyone looks to Dick but stays silent for a few seconds. Gar doesn’t wanna get Rachel in trouble or piss Jason off further so he stays silent. You’re right along with Gar, not wanting to make either one of them angrier. And you wouldn’t want them to tell Dick if you suddenly lost control.

“No, it’s not.” Jason breaks the silence walking over to Dick. “Look, I don’t like being left out of whatever plans you relics are cooking up out there, alright?” Jason’s voice raises as he points a finger at Dick.

Dick lets out a scoff, a humored grin pulling at his lips. “You didn’t miss anything.” Dick assures him. “Gar,” Dick jerks his head at Gar. “I need ya.”

“Hey, what about me?” Jason asks.

“Keep practicing.” Dick says before walking off, Gar giving the room an apologetic glance before following behind him.

Jason walks back over to Rachel, fire in his steps. “You need to have that shit looked at…by like a fucking priest.” Jason's words are venomous as he storms off.

Rachel stands there for a second before turning to look at you. You’re on your feet again, giving her an apologetic look. Jason might be your friend but he does hit below the belt sometimes. Of course, you get it. Rachel definitely could have killed him and that’s terrifying, you know from first-hand experience but he should know Gar and you would have found a way to step in if she were going to kill him. You would have shot acid at Rachel if you needed to. He was fine and he is fine, seemingly at least. He should cut Rachel some slack.

“You okay?” You ask walking over to Rachel.

“I didn’t mean to.” Rachel says, her voice filled of defeat.

“Yeah, I know.” You nod. “He was kind of mean.” You scrunch your nose. “I’m sorry about him.”

“It's not your fault. He’s just an asshole.” Rachel rolls her eyes.

“He is.” You agree. “He is my friend though so I feel I should apologize on his behalf.” You chuckle softly. “Seriously, are you okay though? I mean…with….whatever that was?”

“Yeah,” Rachel nods softly. “I try to control it but it just happens sometimes.”

“Like the scratches?”

“Yeah, I don’t know what to do.”

“Have you tried meditating?” You question, Rachel furrowing her brows at you. “I mean, in theory, it should work, right? Calm you down, ease your mind of the bullshit. I guess…I don’t know. I didn’t meditate or anything but I dissociated enough that it worked, not that that’s a good example. But, maybe in the same sense that meditation could help you control it. It’s worth a shot, right?” You offer.

Rachel lets out a sigh. “Yeah, maybe.” Rachel nods softly. “Thank you.”

“‘Course.” You give her a soft smile. “I’m gonna go check on the little shit and make sure he’s not doing something fucking stupid.” You roll your eyes. “If you wanna talk more about it though, just lemme know.” You give Rachel a kind smile and Rachel nods.

You go to find Jason who’s made it to his room by the time you get there. He’s blaring his music, door shut. You roll your eyes as you make a fist, slamming it against the door so he can hear it over the music. You’ve come to figure out Jason listens to a lot of death metal a lot louder when he’s upset about something. It’s only a few seconds before Jason swings the door open, nearly pulling it from the hinges.

“What?” He asks, venom in his voice and jaw clenching.

Jason isn’t in the mood for talking about it. It’s a thing that happened and on top of that, Dick wants Gar’s help. Gar is his friend, but Jason has more experience with whatever the Titans are up to. He’s Robin, after all. He’s getting shoved to the side and every bit of it makes him want to scream and fight everyone in sight.

“Move.” You scoff at him, pushing past him and walking into his room. Jason stands there for a second as if to be processing what just happened like Internet Explorer.

“Sure, come in.” Jason huffs, shutting the door.

You pull the needle from the record, looking at him with wide eyes. “Death metal, really?” You cross your arms over your chest. “And this loud?” 

“Maybe you just need better taste in music.” Jason quips, leaning against his door with a sutble grin but his stance is still rigged.

“Because the thespian would know better music.” You tease, gaining a smirk as you watches Jason’s grin fall, steam nearly coming out his ears. “I’m fucking joking, calm down. Fuck.” You groan with wide eyes. “I just came to check on you.”

“I’m fine.” Jason mutters, looking to the floor for just a second.

“Mhm, yeah, being fine is definitely a normal feeling after being lifted ten feet in the air by your neck with several sharp swords pointed at you.” You quip. 

“I’m fine.” Jason grits his teeth.

“Well, in that case, you gotta cut Rachel some fucking slack, man.” You urge him, figuring if he’s not gonna talk about it, you might as well go on about Rachel. “It’s not her fault and I know that you know that.” You let out an exasperated sigh. Gar is normally the mediator between the two of them, on the account that you tend to take Jason's side a lot more than Rachel's. Gar is better at putting aside bias.

“She could have fucking killed me!” Jason pushes himself off of his door.

“I know.” You nod. “Which is fucked up, I’m not saying it’s not. It’s just…” You pause. “It’s different for people like us.”

“You don’t have any problems with it.” Jason huffs and he can’t believe of all people, you’re defending Rachel right now.

You pauses because yes you do but that’s not exactly easy to admit. But, this is Jason. “Okay,” You suck in a breath. “Promise not to tell anyone, especially Gar and Dick?” You ask.

Jason raises a brow at you. “Yeah? Okay.”

“Sometimes, I wake up from a nightmare with my hands glowing. I haven’t…burned or melted anything but they’re glowing and warm so…I don’t have nearly as much control as everyone thinks I do.” You chew on the inside of your cheek, dodging Jason’s eyes.

Jason seems to sit on that for a second. You’ve never almost burned any of them even when you get annoyed or angry. Your hands never even glowed once when you beat up Jerry, not once. Jason fully expected to have to deal with your powers but nothing. You seemed normal in that moment, no powers, no special abilities. He almost finds it hard to believe you can’t control your powers when you’re asleep. But, you also don’t lie to him.

“I also melted a mug my second day here by accident.” You clear your throat.

“How’d the hell you do that?” Jason chuckles this time, finding that more believable than the nightmares.

“I figured out Dick was Robin and Bruce was Batman. Long story short, I’ve got a bit of an issue with the two of them letting Joker fuck around and kill people, my mom included.” You shake your head, seeing Jason doing the math in his head trying to figure out if it was Dick at the time your mom was killed. “It was Dick, it wasn’t you. You took over, if my math is right, somewhere around six months to a year later.”

“Hadn’t thought of it like that.” Jason looks to his shoes before looking back at You. “Bruce not killing the Joker and shit, the consequences.” Jason clarifies.

He’s questioned Bruce’s methods, of course. He also thinks maybe some of those bad guys shouldn’t be allowed to escape Arkham. But, Bruce always said they’re there to protect people, not kill them. Killing the bad guys, makes them just as bad. It’s a line they can’t cross because it’ll be easier to cross the next time. But, at what point is enough enough when it comes to the Joker? How many people could be saved if it were just that one guy? Jason pushes the thought away though.

“Yeah, most don’t.” You clear your throat. “SO, I’m saying you should cool off and be upset about it, obviously, it looked scary from where I was standing, too but maybe don’t be a dick to her about it.”

Jason is stubborn but you bring up good points. Maybe, he could make an attempt to somewhat try and understand Rachel a little bit. Maybe.

“Whatever.” Jason huffs, caving in.

“Mhm, thank you, Jay.” Your voice waves as you walk over to him.

“Yeah.” Jason still looks displeased.

“Or pout about it.” You chuckle, getting a glare from Jason.

“I’m not pouting.” Jason huffs, but there’s a tint of smile coming to his face.

“Mhm.” You hum. “Well, I’m gonna wait for Gar, have fun being angry with your death metal.” You grin at him, see a full smile coming to Jason’s face.

“Yeah.” Jason shrug as you walk past him, leaving him alone.

You go back to your room, keeping the door open as you wait to find out what Dick needed Gar for. It still bugs you a bit that Dick picked Gar to help and not Jason but Jason was definitely not in a talking mood. You didn’t wanna push your luck with him. So, you hang out in your room and just wait with Ginny & Georgia playing on the TV.

As the second episode plays, a knock sounds on your door. You look over the back of the couch to see Gar walking into your room with a sappy smile on his lips. He walks over to the couch and plops down beside you.

“Whatcha watching?” He asks, chipper as usual.

“Ginny & Georgia, it was just added to Netflix.” You gesture towards the TV.

“How is it?” He asks.

“It’s good!” You say with enthusiasm. “I love Joe so much already. I hope he gets to stay happy.” You pout at Gar.

Gar chuckles softly. “Cool if I watch with you, then?” He asks, eyes filled of happiness and hope.

“Yeah! I’m only on episode two so you haven’t missed much. Georgia’s husband died and she doesn’t seem sad about it. They moved from Texas to Wellsbury which is on the east coast. Ginny and Austin are her kids and Ginny hooked up with her neighbor. That’s about it.” You laugh softly.

“Oh, well, okay then.” Gar nods along. “Is it….a comedy?”

“Eh,” You shrug a shoulder. “It’s more of drama. Like it has some comedy but it’s more dramatic.” You explain. “I think Georgia killed her husband so like there’s that.”

Gar’s eyes widen. “Definitely a drama.” He laughs.

“Oh, yeah.” You laugh in agreement.

The two of you focus your attention on the TV and you move closer to Gar, resting your legs over his lap. It makes Gar chuckle but he just goes with it, putting his hands on your shins and you watch together, making easy conversation about what’s going on in the show. This is a comfortable thing you’ve gotten into the habit of doing.

Gar will be playing video games so you sit next to him, usually always touching him in some way or Gar will come into your room where you’re watching TV and he’ll just plop down to watch whatever has your interest. You always moves to sit with your legs over him. And the two of you always make conversation about what’s going on and you get really dramatic and excited when you talk about your shows, it’s how Gar thinks he sounds but you’re not annoying. Sometimes, he thinks he just gets annoying about it but hearing you ramble about why you love a character or hate another, he could listen to that all day even if he has no idea what you’re talking about. It’s so comfortable for him.

After a few more episodes, you both realize no one has bothered you in a few hours. Neither of you even have a text from Dick about training. The older Titans must be keeping him occupied which is definitely nice. Training isn’t actually all that bad and it gives you all something to do. But, Dick doesn’t really give you a day to break. None of you have anything else to do, so Dick just makes sure you’re training all the time in one way or another. The four of you get it, you have to prepare for the big bads, but having a day off here and there would also be nice. And right now, it looks like you’re actually getting the night off and you’re enjoying it.

“Hey, want some popcorn?” You ask, peeling your eyes away from the TV to look at Gar.

“Yes, please.” Gar beams. “Want me to get it?”

“Nah,” You shake your head, sliding your legs off of Gar. “I got it.” You give him a smile. “Just pause it and make sure it doesn’t shut off.”

“Got it.” Gar gives you a nod, grabbing the remote from the coffee table in front of him.

You rush off to the kitchen where you find Rachel making herself a glass of sweet tea. You move around her, grabbing a bag of popcorn and popping it in the microwave before you grab a large bowl to pour it into. You sit on the counter, opposite Rachel, as you wait for the popcorn to start. Just as you get situated and Rachel finishes making her tea, Rose walks in. Instead of gauze, Rose is daunting an eyepatch over the eye that’s now missing.

“Don’t think we got introduced,” Rachel starts. “I’m Rachel.”

“Y/n.” You chime in, with a half-wave from your spot.

“I’m Rose.” Rose says.

“Pretty name.” Rachel says.

“Yeah, maybe too pretty now.” Rose says. “Patch has a nice ring to it.” Rose finishes as you let out a huff.

“I still think you’re really pretty.” You let out a scoff, giving Rose a smile. Rose’s brows furrow at you and Rachel rolls her eyes.

“You hang out with Jason too much.” Rachel states, getting a confused and offended look from you just as your popcorn starts to pop.

“I don’t get this.” Rose starts, ignoring the both of yours and Rachel’s comments to each other while she takes a seat in one of the chairs. “The whole living situation, this some kind of euro hostel or something?” Rose quips making you chortle.

Rachel lets out a huff. “No, we’re just friends.”

“Dick’s got a thing for plucking strays off the streets.” You add in.

"I'm not a stray." Rose defends, but her voice isn't stern or annoyed.

“We saw what happened.” Rachel looks between you and Rose.

“Saw what?” Rose inquires.

“Dick has access to the city’s surveillance cameras.” Rachel explains.

“We saw everything. You fighting and escaping, the whole thing.” You finish.

“Guy with the sword?” Rachel asks.

“My dad.” Rose gains a sarcastic grin.

You give her a yikes expression before hopping off the counter and going to the microwave as the popcorn starts to slow down its popping. Somehow, all of you have fucked up home lives. Seriously, is that a requirement to even be here?

“I’m sorry.” Rachel says.

“Dads suck.” You declare, opening the microwave.

“No dad of the year mug for him.” Rose quips before looking to Rachel. “That thing in your forehead, bold choice.” Rose nods her head.

You pour your popcorn into a bowl as you listen to Rachel, you actually don’t know the story behind it. You never asked.

“Not my choice.” Rachel shakes her head. “My dad put it there for me.”

“He did?” Your voice is filled of surprise and confusion.

“Yep.” Rachel holds out the word a little.

Now, that’s also weird. You figured it has to do with her powers since it lit up when she levitated her and Jason earlier. You have so many questions about it but Rachel’s singular word about it is probably a good indicator that she doesn’t like to talk about it. You can’t blame her there.

“Where’s he?” Rose asks.

“I got rid of him.” Rachel declares.

“Got rid of as in…? Killed him?” Rose asks.

“Yeah, kind of.” Rachel tries to brush it off as she scoffs.

“What about you?” Rose looks to you who’s standing on the other side of Rachel.

“Drug addict who bailed before I was born, foster dad almost beat me to death though.” You state, an almost sarcastic tone coats your words. “Ligature scars from the ordeal.” You lift your arms just slightly so your sleeves fall down enough to show the scars.

“Shit.” Rose states.

“Clearly, the tower is filled with people who had outstanding father figures.” You quips, getting a slight nudge from Rachel.

“Is that what you wanted to do to your father? Kill him?” Rachel asks.

“I did.” Rose nods. “But, uh, I thought everything would be different if he just went away.”

“Doesn’t always work.” Rachel takes a drink from her tea. “Right, Y/n?”

“I know you want me to agree with you but…” You pause. “I gotta say, I’m pretty content with my actual dad fucking off somewhere and me beating the shit out of Jerry now that it’s happened.”

Was that night a mess? Yes. But, talking with Jason about it has made you feel a lot better about it. He's told you countless times he deserved it and because of that, you did save that kid. You got your revenge and now he can't do that to anyone ever again. It didn't help that night, and maybe the act of beating him up didn't help, but preventing him from hurting anyone else did.

“Seriously?” Rachel voice is disapproving. 

You shrug. “I’m not gonna lie.” You laugh softly.

“Guess we’re all members of the bad dads club.” Rose gives the two of you a genuine smile.

“Platinum members.” Rachel scoffs.

“With a discount in endless trauma.” You quip.

“Benefits kind of suck.” Rose states.

“Members are pretty cool.” Rachel smiles softly, Rose matching the smile.

“What do you guys do all day anyway?” Rose questions.

“Train.” Rachel’s voice is flat.

“Listen to everyone complain about training.” You let out a muttered scoff.

“As if you’re not enjoying the night off with Gar.” Rachel quips.

“I am having a lovely time.” You grin. “Which is why, I’m going back to my room where he’s waiting.”

“Don’t do anything stupid.” Rachel mocks.

“We are friends, Rachel.” You defend.

“Okay, Y/n.”

You roll your eyes. “Okay, Rachel.” You mock her before walking off back to your room where Gar is still sitting in the same position.

You think about the conversation you had with Rachel about the boys. There was so much you couldn’t tell Rachel about Jason. Jason would kill you and Rachel would definitely tease him about it, even if it just slipped. You don’t want that to happen. It’s your thing and you kind of like that no one knows about it. You can’t really explain it, but it’s just nice not having everyone know about it.

With Gar, everything is out in the open which is also fine because that’s just Gar. He doesn’t hide things from people, he wears his emotions on his sleeve. It’s something you actually admire about him and it’s one of the things you like about him. But, in a way, there’s this pressure you don’t like. Rachel knew you liked him and she thinks Gar likes you, too. Part of it is on you, sleeping in his room, making him pancakes. But, you just wish you were normal because then it would be this normal gossip thing where no one knows for sure. In the tower, surrounded by people all the time though, everything is so fucking transparent. The tower might as well be wrapped in cellophane. So, you take a seat next to Gar and don’t say anything about how you feel because you like him but you like Jason, too.

“Talked with Rose.” You start, resting your legs over Gar’s as you get comfortable, holding the bowl of popcorn on your lap but close enough so Gar can have some.

“Yeah? What’s she like?” Gar asks, his left hand resting on your shins as his right plucks a piece of popcorn from the bowl.

“Daddy issues like the rest of us.” You chortle, tossing a piece of popcorn into your mouth.

"We knew that, though." Gar chuckles with you, finding you amusing.

"Yeah," You shrug. "I don't know, didn't talk long but she seems cool. Rachel is still in the kitchen with her."

"Think she'll stay?" Gar raises a brow and it worked out with you staying. He's worried about her being Deathstroke's daughter, which might put all of you at risk. But, if she's really in danger. Gar hopes she'll stay. It's safe here.

You scrunch your face with uncertainty. "Ehh," You shrug. "She doesn't seem too pleased with the place. So, I dunno. I hope she does. It helped me." You give Gar a sweet smile.

"Yeah, I think it'd be nice. We'll have to keep Jason off of her though." Gar chuckles.

You brush the comment off. Maybe Jason will be into her and it'll make everything easier. Choosing between the boys sounds like an impossible decision.

"Yeah, right?" You nod your head, agreeing with him but keep it short. You look to the TV and change conversation. "Do teenagers actually get together and do that?" The teenagers in the show are in a basement, a few of them playing instruments while the others are smoking on a couch.

"That's where you're questioning the realism of the show?" Gar chortles next you, grabbing a few pieces of popcorn.

"I mean! Hey, women have poisoned their husbands! They're even called Black Widows! But, teenagers all getting together to drink and smoke in a basement? Like regularly? Do they do that?"

Gar shrugs, finding your thought process a bit comical. "I wouldn't know."

"Right." You nod and laugh. "Forgot, none of us had much of a normal teenager experience."

Gar shakes his head. "Fine with me, seems..."

"Not as fun as they make it seem in the show?” You laugh softly.

“Yeah, exactly.” Gar nods quickly. “I don’t think it’d always be so cool, calm, and collected.”

There's a knock on your door, interrupting your conversation. The two of you turn around to see Dick, standing halfway in your room and half in the hallway.

"Gar, need ya again." Dick jerks his head towards the hallway and your brows furrow. What the hell is that about? Gar gives you an apologetic look as you move your legs off of him.

You spin around, resting your forearms on the back of the couch. "Whatcha doing?" You ask Dick as Gar gets up from his comfortable place.

"Locating Dr. Light." Dick answers simply.

You hum. "Can I come?"

It's Dick's turn to narrow his eyes. "No, I just need Gar for now." 

You groan. "Come on, Rachel is hanging out with Rose and Jason is in a pissy mood."

After the whole Jerry situation, Dick has been keeping a closer eye on you. He wants to trust you won't go rogue again but there is a part of him that worries about it. Dick went back and watched the security footage of everything, listened to the conversation. Jason did not try to stop you but it didn't seem as if you would have listened anyway. He doesn't need someone going rogue. But, if you’re with Gar, at least if you find Dr. Light, Dick can trust Gar to come and get him instead of you both trying to play the heroes.

"Okay, fine. Come on." Dick jerks his head and you beam, happy to be included.

You turn the TV off, practically leaping over the back of the couch and meeting the boys at the door. Gar's eyes widen and beam at the sight of your dramatics. Dick shakes his head but chuckles softly as the three of you head to the comms lab.

Gar slides into the chair and pulls up a map while Dick stands behind him and you stand off to the side, watching everything Gar is doing. You can only assume that with his time at Doom Manor, he had a lot of time to mess around with tech stuff. Maybe that's why Dick is asking for his help for this stuff instead of anyone else. Gar already has some background with computers and tech and he's a new Titan. Maybe it's a preparation thing. But, you’re also just happy to be included.

"Dr. Light will need to refuel if he's planning another attack." Dick starts. "He'll need a large electric power cell and a light source where he can absorb the energy."

Gar leans his elbows on the table in front of him, keeping his eyes on the screen. "So, monitor the power grids and keep an eye out for any unusual disturbances."

"We find where he's pulling the power from, we find him." Dick finishes before patting Gar on the back and heading for the hallway.

"Okay, got it." Gar's eyes scan over the computer screen.

"Oh, hey," Dick says, turning around before entering the hallway. "Everything okay with Rachel?" Dick looks between Gar and you. "She looked a little strange in training."

"She's fine." You answer quickly with the shrug of your shoulders.

Gar nods his head in agreement. "Yeah," He swivels in his chair to face Dick. "That was just...her..." Gar glances to you as if looking for help as he tries to think of something.

Neither of you are going to tell Dick Rachel almost killed Jason and then Jason called her a freak, then said she should be checked by a priest. Dick doesn't need to know everything that happens. You all can handle it.

"Training face." Gar gives Dick an awkward smile, spinning the chair slightly.

"Traning face?" Dick looks to Gar and then to you, completely not believing that at all.

"Yeah, she gets really focused and gets this look." You brush it off.

"Yeah, exactly." Gar agrees with you, the both of tyou lying through your teeth. You’re a bit better at it. "She just wants to be ready in case any of the old Titans wanna spar," Gar's eyes shift side to side for a second. "After, they settle in." He flashes the awkward smile again and you’re so sure Dick is going to call you out.

Note to self: Do not ask Gar to help you rob a bank.

"They're not gonna settle in." Dick states, this time his voice serious and stern. Your curiosity is piqued. Dick doesn't seem happy about them showing up which you find to be weird. Aren't they supposed to be friends? Is this because Deathstroke killed one of them? If it is, you can't say you blame Dick. It was probably really hard. "Hank and Dawn, Donna, they're not staying."

"I thought you guys were friends?" You ask.

"We are." Dick answers shortly. "But they aren't Titans anymore."

Gar's face twists in confusion. Everything was fine the last time they were all together, well, besides the whole Trigon thing. But, everyone got along afterward. "Did something happen between you guys?"

Dick's eyes go distant for a second before he drops it completely. "Keep looking." Dick states before walking off, down the hallway.

You look to Gar as he swivels to face you. "That was fucking weird." You say, shaking your head with wide eyes.

"Right?" Gar says dramatically. "What do you think that was about?"

"Uh...." You pause, shrugging your shoulders. "I mean, could be the death of that Titan, maybe it's like....a thing with them all being here?" You raise the question. "Everyone was there with Trigon, right?"

Gar nods before he turns back to the computer to get to work. "Yeah, I mean, besides....ya know." Gar jerks his head to the left with the quick raise of his brows as he starts searching the power grids. "But, I mean, after everything seemed fine. Dick was...actually in a good mood, actually."

You watch Gar carefully, taking mental notes of everything he's doing. "Maybe it's something with the tower then, everyone being here. I have no idea." You chuckle softly. "Bird boys make no fucking sense."

"Honestly," Gar shakes his head. "What do you think is up with that, anyway?" Gar glances to you.

You shrug. "Well, first full day here, I asked Dick about Bruce and he said that Bruce did the best he could which I always assume means that person sucks at parenting, without intending to." You chuckle softly. "So, could be Bruce."

"I think you just have a vendetta against him." Gar says honestly, giving you a slight wince.

You let out a sigh. "Yeah, a little bit." You move closer to Gar. "Can I sit?"

Gar's eyes widen as he freezes and you gain a smirk. A giggle escapes your lips and it's the cutest noise Gar has ever heard. He scoots back a bit and lets you sit on his lap, you mostly sitting on his right leg so Gar can see and maneuver around the keyboard easily.

"What do you think is up with bird boys?" You ask as Gar goes back to the power grids.

Gar shrugs. "I don't think they know how to handle their problems." Gar deadpans.

You let out a laugh. "Yeah, that's fair." You keep your head straight, watching the large screen. "How do you know how to do all this?" You decide to drop the conversation.

"Had a lot of free time at Caulder House." Gar states. "There wasn't much to do besides this and video games."

"Ah," You nod your head. "It's pretty cool, especially with how quickly tech changes and this is like...a Batcomputer." Your smile widens. Sure, you’ve got an issue with Batman but Wayne tech is cool nonetheless. Your problem is with his moral code about killing, not with much else. You don't even know the guy.

"Yeah, it's clearly coming in handy." Gar laughs softly.

Gar and you fall into a comfortable conversation as Gar explains what he's doing and how he knows what to look for. You follow everything he says, making sure you’re keeping up. The thing with Gar is that he's really good at explaining things without making your feel dumb. Sometimes, people have this habit of sounding condescending when they're explaining something they're good at even if they don't mean to. But, Gar explains it casually but in terms you understand since you don't know much about this tech. In fact, the way Gar explains everything, it makes you feel useful which is a really nice thing to feel right about now.

Over the next hour, you and Gar sit and look for signs of Dr. Light. You like seeing Gar here, doing this. It's clearly his environment, something he's good at and enjoys. He's also helping the older Titans by doing this and you can tell by how focused he is that it's something that also means a lot to him. He gets to be helpful with the thing he's good at.

The two of you share stolen glances here and there. There's something so warm and comfortable about it. While you’re more of a hands-on person, this is nice. You aren't really helping, rather than just keeping Gar company and learning from him. But, it's comfortable and if you’ve learned anything, it's that you should cherish the comfort while you have it.

Gar is so kind and soft and safe that feeling comfortable seems like it could be possible, every single day. He's energic and enthusiastic. You swear there's not a pessimistic bone in his body. And he has this smile that just put the sun to shame. You swear if he just gave you that open-mouthed toothy smile, you’d never get lost in the dark again. And sometimes he trips over his words if you get a little flirty and it make you so happy because he never knows what to do. It makes him that much cuter and softer. He is what you always imagined happiness would look like. If happiness were a person, it would be Garfield Logan. You wonder if you could ever offer him that same comfort and happiness. You wonder if you'd ever live up to that or if you'd just burn it all to the ground.

Gar finds something on the computer and goes to grab Dick. The two of them discuss, figuring the bundle of pings is actually Dr. Light. And then the power goes out as if to be on cue. You follow Gar and Dick out of the comms lab and into the living room. As you all reach the floor-to-ceiling windows, you see a stadium in the distance that's emitting light, indicating that's where Dr. Light is. You get the feeling that's probably not a good sign for whatever is to come next and by the look on Dick's face, he's got the same feeling.

Dick goes off to grab the rest of the Titans to hunt down Dr. Light while Gar figures the rest of you might as well hang out in the living room and watch something on someone's phone. You have gone almost entirely quiet since the power went out. He hasn't said anything, but he's kind of assumed you aren't a big fan of the dark. You usually have the TV on or the blinds pulled when you’re asleep so the room isn't so dark. Gar thinks maybe if he can get everyone in an open area, you'll feel a little better about it. So, you make your way to Jason's room first.

Gar’s assumption would be right. The dark wasn’t this big deal or anything before, but now it’s as if things are lurking in the shadows. You just feel so uneasy not being able to see in the dark. The great thing about the tower, usually, is there are always lights on. The hallway is always lit by small wall lamps so it’s never too dark. The rooms all have large windows that go from one wall to the other and the city does a good job of illuminating every room. But, the entire city is in a blackout and it’s almost completely dark in the tower. You hate it and with Gar’s offer to gather everyone up, you’re thankful you don’t need to explain it. He’s figured it out.

"What's up?" Jason asks as the two of you and Gar enter his room.

"The power's out." You quip, trying to not show you’re uneasy about the entire tower being dark.

"No shit." Jason shakes his head, his phone in his hand to use as a flashlight.

"I figured we'd all hang out together, just until it comes back on." Gar offers, his own phone’s light shining on the ground.

"All?" Jason questions, his brow quirked as he glances to you. Jason knows all does not mean all of the older Titans and he does not want to be around Rachel right about now.

"Well..." Gar pauses. "You, us, Rachel."

Jason lets out a groan before it turns into a dry laugh. "You think I wanna be around her right now?"

"She's sorry." Your voice is filled with frustration. "It was an accident."

"What about the other Titans?" Jason jerks his head up with the question.

"They're probably going to find Dr. Light. I found something on the computer." Gar brushes it off and Jason's eyes widen. You let out a sigh knowing Gar should not have said that.

"What? Why didn't you say so?" There's excitement in his voice as he runs over to his bed, getting on his hands and knees.

You eye Gar, as if telling him he should not have told Jason. "What the fuck are you doing?"

"I'm going with 'em!" Jason says, pulling out the case that contains his suit.

Gar gets the look now. "Right..." Gar nods his head slowly. "I'm sure Dick will come get you if he needs you, man."

"Seriously?" Jason puts the case on his bed before turning to face you and Gar. "I gotta show him I'm ready for anything. I'm tired of sitting around." Jason reaches over his head, yanking his hoodie off, you getting the nonexistent hint to turn around.

"He knows what you're made of, Jason." Gar lets out a sigh as Jason changes into his suit.

"Obviously, not." Jason argues. "He didn't come to get me, did he?" Jason gets a little snippy and all Gar can do is sigh.

Jason finishes changing into his suit, making his way to you and Gar. You turn around, feeling him close to you. Jason's head is held high and there's a brightness in his eyes. His entire demeanor changes when he puts on the suit. He's, somehow, even more endearing when he's like this. Filled of so much joy and excitement and determination. You know Dick won't let him go with and it's gonna sting him a lot more than he'll ever admit.

"Well, be careful then, Batboy." You state, knowing there is no stopping Jason.

Jason eyes you up and down, not even realizing he's doing it. A smirk pulls at his lips and he almost has a quip, almost but Gar is standing there, a little too close to you. So, he bites it down like a shard of glass. "Always am." He nods at you before quickly exiting his room, the cape flowing behind him.

"He's a dork." You look to Gar, a smile pull at your lips.

"It's the cape, right?" Gar laughs.

You nod quickly. "Yeah, yeah, something about the cape on him. It's like it swallows him." You laugh again. "It is bulletproof and fireproof though."

"At least there's that." Gar chuckles. "Let's find Rach." He jerks his head towards Jason's door and the two of you head out.

The two of you head down the hall where you run into Rachel. She had been on her way to look for the two of you. The tower is on backup generators now but the power in the tower is limited. This surprises all of you. You all thought, surely, Bruce would have a better generator for the tower. But, none of you say anything about it and decide to head to the living room and find something to do while you wait for the power to come back on and for the other Titans to get back. When you reach the living space, Jason is standing there alone in the Robin suit, the rest of the Titans in the elevator.

Jason's jaw clenches as he sees the three of you standing there looking at him. Rachel isn't surprised and she's actually pleased with Jason being left behind. Rachel doesn't think Jason is ready to help the rest of the Titans, and it's not fair to let him go but not the rest of you. Gar and you, on the other hand, you feel bad for him. He just wants to help and he's your friend. You also know that Jason will probably be pissed about this for the next week and you'll be the ones who have to hear about it. Dick should just let him help, they have the same experience.

Jason pushes past the three of you, not saying a word.

"He's such a try-hard." Rachel mutters as the three of you walk over to the couches.

You furrow your brows as you and Gar sit side-by-side, his arm going behind you as if to be an instinct. "I mean...he is Robin, though?"

"Yeah, but why does he think he should be able to help when none of us are?" Rachel argues.

"He has experience?" Gar questions, his expression matching the confused and defensive one you have.

"Not you, too!" Rachel groans out in frustration. She doesn't get why you and Gar almost always side with Jason.

"What?" Gar asks, unamused over this conversation.

"You guys defending him."

"Well, because we get it." Gar's eyes widen slightly, a hint of annoyance in his voice. The petty arguing and hatred between Rachel and Jason actually drives him insane. Sure, Jason deserves it sometimes but he's not even around right now. Why does it matter?

"Yeah, I mean, it's like important to him." You state, your eyes still slightly narrowed. When you told Rachel to talk to Jason about this, you did in fact mean it. You, too, aren't a fan of the petty arguments either between the two of them or about each other.

"It's important to everyone." Rachel urges. "Why does he think it's the most important thing to him?"

You and Gar stare at each other, as if to be silently communicating 'what the fuck'. Rachel is clearly still upset by Jason's words from the morning. Of course, neither of you blame her but you are Jason’s friend. You both defend Rachel when Jason gets all pissy with her and you both defend Jason. But, this is just annoying. The Titans have gone off to find Dr. Light, you're trapped in the tower without any power. Who even cares?

"You're not friends with him so you don't get it." You brush her off. "And not to sound a bit bitchy, but it's not our job to explain it to you." You shrug and pull your phone from your pocket. "I'm gonna turn my show on, you're welcome to watch with us." You pull up Netflix on your phone before handing it to Gar as he puts in the password.

You rest the phone on the ottoman, using one of the random books from the table to stabilize your phone. Rachel huffs a bit but moves closer to you so she can watch the show. She decides to drop it and maybe she is being a bit unreasonable. She doesn't understand Jason and she probably never will. But, she also hasn't taken your advice about talking to him yet. So, Rachel bites back the other comments she has about Jason and listens to you and Gar explain what she's missed so far.

Only a few more minutes go by when Jason and Rose come into view, the two of them heading for the opposite hallway. You’re the first to notice, followed by Gar. Rachel is too busy watching the show to even care.

"What's going on?" Gar asks, cautiously seeing the two of them walking side-by-side.

Jason looks like he's doing a bit better. "Going to train, nothing else to do anyway."

"You training, too?" You quirk a brow at Rose.

Rose tilts her head just slightly to the side. "Nah," She shakes her head. "I'm gonna kick his ass." 

"Fuck off." Jason huffs, but a smile is on his lips.

"Please, do. Someone's gotta kick him around now and again." You grin at Jason.

His eyes narrow at you. "Yeah, cause you never will."

"One day, Jay. One day." You wiggle your brows at him before looking back at your phone, trying to ignore the weird warmth in your stomach. That is not jealousy.

"When hell freezes over." Jason scoffs but you keep your eyes on the screen and there's a disappointment that bites Jason's bone. His smile falls and he thought you'd have some come back about beating his ass even when hell freezes over or something dumb. But, you say nothing and he's disappointed in that. "Whatever," He scoffs, jerking his head towards the hall. "Let's go." Jason and Rose leave the three of you to yourselves.

You think Gar doesn't notice the short banter that wasn't really banter. You think he doesn't notice the way your eyes narrowed and the way the grin turned stale. You think he doesn't notice how you are with Jason and it hurts Gar. He likes you but he thinks maybe you’re more into Jason than you'll ever be into him. Sure, you’re choosing to hang out with him more but you and Jason still do your flirty thing. It doesn't really make any sense to him if he's being honest.

After two hours, the power finally comes back on. Every light in the tower turns back on and the lights of the city start to shine through the floor-to-ceiling windows once again. The three of you breathe a sigh of relief, hoping that means the other Titans took down Dr. Light with success. You all move the show to the TV and wait on the edge of your seats for the other Titans to come back. Jason and Rose join the three of you just a few minutes later as if to also be waiting for the other Titans. Jason steals the remote and switches to the news.

"Well, you could have asked first, but sure." You quip but Jason brushes you off as he stands off to the side of Gar, arms crossed.

The news plays over footage of the Titans fighting Dr. Light and failing. Dick chooses to save a busload of people instead of stopping Dr. Light. Dr. Light takes off and he's completely out of sight. The news reports that he's nowhere to be seen but everyone on the bus is safe.

"And that's why they should have fucking let me go!" Jason complains, flinging one of his arms out.

All of you chooses not to argue or humor Jason. The rest of the Titans are probably going to be upset when they get back and Jason will have some sort of comment about it. It's not worth it for any of you to argue or agree with him. You'll leave that to Dick and the other Titans.

As soon as the rest of the Titans get back, you, Gar, Rachel, and Jason keep your places in the living area beside Rose who doesn't want any part of it, apparently. You all wait until Dawn and Hank head off toward the bedrooms, leaving just Dick in the living area. Jason takes the lead and gets up first, the rest of you following him

"Where's Dr. Light?" Jason taunts Dick as he walks closer to him.

"Jason." Rachel warns.

"A little stealth job on a guy who shoots what? Headlamps? I mean half the city's on fire and still no sign of Dr. Light." Jason is now about a foot away from Dick, Gar, you, and Rachel standing two feet behind Jason not liking where this is going.

"Not the time, Jason." Dick warns him.

Jason rushes Dick quickly, almost chest-to-chest with him. "Look, I don't take orders from you anymore, man. I do what I want when I want." Jason states, eying Dick with anger. You roll your eyes behind him and Gar sucks in a breath, knowing this is not going to end well.

Dick gets this smile that is almost his way of telling Jason how fucking stupid that is. He goes to walk past Jason but Jason puts his hand on his chest, stopping Dick in his tracks. Dick looks almost appalled. You thought Dick wasn't as great at hiding his emotions when you first got here but the more you watch him, the more you realize he's actually very good at it. He just has resting bitch face. But, it's obvious by the way his brows went up and his eyes widened just a little that he was shocked and appalled that Jason stopped him.

"Get out of my way." Dick's voice is stern and unwavering.

"I think you got it all wrong," Jason shakes his head at Dick, a little close to him for everyone's comfort. Jason hits Dick's chest again with an open palm. "You're in my way." The three of you behind Jason can feel this going south very quickly but none of you want to insert yourselves in it. You’re a bit interested to see where this will go and how Dick plans to de-escalate the situation. "Maybe you need a retirement package."

You and Gar glance between each other before turning back to Jason. You want to help break this up but how? This is not your battle and if you take Dick's side, you'll be hearing from Jason about it. So, you both stand back as Jason turns to look at you for just a second. He's got this determined look in his eye that makes you quirk a brow. He makes a fist and all three of you shake your heads slightly.

"Don't." Dick grits his teeth, his nose scrunching up. Yeah, tonight is not the night to pick a fight with Dick.

Jason tries to charge Dick but Dick is faster and takes an open palm to back of his head, pushing him to the ground. You let out a sigh, hanging your head and holding the bridge of your nose. Gar has resorted to looking down and running a hand through his hair, a look of exasperation across his face. Rachel leans forward, simply surprised.

Dick even looks a bit surprised. "Shit." Dick says softly as he reaches a hand towards Jason. "Here." His voice is flat.

Jason slaps Dick's hand away before getting up from the floor. Jason's heaving a few breaths as if the anger is consuming him from the pit of his lungs. He stands toe-to-toe with Dick but doesn't say anything. He pushes past him and heads off down the hallway. Dick looks at the three of you who all look like you're torn between second-hand embarrassment and yikes.

"What was that?" Dick asks, his eyes directly at you.

"Got me." You shrug. If Dick really can't figure out what Jason is upset about, he's actively choosing to be obvious or something because Dick isn't stupid.

Dick shakes his head and decides he'll deal with it later. "Gar, come on, need you again." Dick starts walking past all of you.

"I'll come to your room later." Gar gives you an apologetic look.

"I'm gonna check on Jason anyway." You roll your eyes and everyone goes their separate ways, leaving Rachel in the living room.

You head to Jason's room where his music is yet again blaring. You bang on the door and he doesn't answer at first. You suck in a breath and decide you’re just going to keep banging on the door until he answers it. It's a solid minute of knocking before the door swings open, Jason's cheeks red and his eyes wide, filled of rage.

"What the fuck?!"

"Move." You move past him and Jason wants to know why you do this? And why does he let you? You spin around. "What the fuck to you? What the fuck was that with Dick, dude?"

"Oh, this is about Dick, huh?" Jason yells, his face scrunching with anger as he shuts the door.

"You were going to fight him." You say through gritted teeth. "Why?"

"He thinks he fucking knows everything!" Jason swings his arm out. "But he got fucking beat by Dr. Light, a fucking dude whose power is a streetlamp." Jason scoffs, the very thought of this guy comical to him.

"Okay." You lower your voice. "So, why not let him wallow in his own mistakes then? Why do you gotta rub it in?"

"Are you fucking kidding me? You're taking his side?!" Jason’s voice goes up an octave.

"NO!" You yell at him. "I'll always take y0our side! Just..." You pause, letting yourself take a breath. "Just, fucking talk to me, Jay." You cave, chewing the inside of your cheek. He's never gone after Dick before. It's like all of them said, Jason gets mad and rants and raves, trains a bit, and that's it. He doesn't go after people, but tonight he did. You’re worried about him.

Jason shakes his head, looking to the ground and you have this way of calming him down. You’re just as hot-headed as he is but when he's screaming, you can just stay calm. It might take a minute, but you calming down and asking him such a simple question, gets him to cool off. It’s the way you call him Jay and it’s like it flips the switch. You call him that nickname, you’re the only one, and he knows he can talk.

"I just wanna fucking help." Jason scoffs, leaning against his door. "I feel fucking useless here and he won't let me fucking help. If I could show him what I can do..."

"Maybe he'll let you actually help." You finish for him.

"Yeah, Robin is like," Jason lets out a scoff. "It's the one thing I've been fucking good at. It feels like it's being taken away from me and there's nothing I can fucking do about it." There's a break in his voice and you feel for him.

It's the first time he's admitted any of that. The thing about Robin is Jason has always been a hothead. He's always liked attention. The world has been unfair to him his entire life. But, he puts on that suit and the hot-headedness actually comes in handy sometimes, dealing with these big bads like the Riddler and the Joker. The attention is on him because he's a hero with Batman. And he gets to level the playing field in the world that's treated him so poorly. He's so good at it, too and he knows it. But, it's all being ripped away from him. Sure, it’s his own doing but, maybe if Bruce or Dick offered him an ear every now and again, they would get why Jason does things like joyrides in the Batmobile and riding a motorcycle in the manor.

"Yeah, I get that." You nod and move to stand next to him, leaning against his door with him. "But, uh, for what's it worth, I would care to argue you're also a good friend. You're good at that."

Jason lets out a laugh. "Yeah, that's real fucking inspiring."

You shrug, laughing with him. "It's better than nothing, right? No, but you're a good reader and you are funny. You are a good Robin. You’re a better Robin than Dick was." You eye him, the laugh falling. "And I'm not just filling your ego." You give him a smirk.

"Aw, can't fill it even a little, babe?" Jason's brows knit together and he's got this half-cocked grin that makes your stomach twist. 

The nickname makes your knees weak. "Absolutely not, shithead."

Jason lets out another laugh. "Thank you."

"Yeah, no problem. You know I'm always gonna be here for ya." You give him a wink. "I don't think Dick's worth it anyway." You let out a sigh.

"Back to having an issue with him?" Jason nods with understanding. He's in a constant state of flip-flopping on having an issue with him.

"Nah, I just mean I don't think he's worth it. If you're gonna fight a Titan, at least make it worth it, ya know? Like, it's Dick. He's whatever and it's like tragic in a pathetic kind of way to watch two Robins fight each other. I mean how fucking cliche. Fight Hank or some shit." You scoff. "Or prove yourself in a different way, one that doesn't involve tagging along where they shove you into a corner anyway."

"I'd obliterate Hank." Jason chortles, his head is high and his chest puffed out with confidence.

"See, exactly!" You cheer.

Jason pauses for a second and maybe you have a point. Maybe he could find a way to show Dick in a different way. He doesn't need to rely on Dick to invite him out onto the field. He could just do it himself.

"Hey," Jason's brows furrow as he looks to you, an idea popping into his head. "Gar still helping Dick?"

Your eyes narrow at him, not liking the question. "Assume so...why?"

"We could help." Jason proposes the idea and you just know he doesn't want to sit in front of a computer as a way to help. Jason is a hands-on kind of hero.

"Mmm." You hum. "What's your angle?"

"You said prove myself in a different way." Jason give you an eerily innocent smile.

"Mhm." You hum. "Yeah, he's probably in the comms lab trying to locate Dr. Light again." You tell him, trying to figure out what exactly he's getting at. Jason is anything but innocent.

Jason pushes himself from the door, gesturing for you to follow his lead. "So, let's help. An apology to Dick, offer my help here."

"Yeah, I don't believe your intentions are so pure if I'm being honest." You state, keeping your stance against his door.

Jason has a cocked grin, eyes devious. "You gonna stop me?"

You should but he didn't stop you. So, you roll your eyes and push off of the door. "Guess not."

Jason has this triumphant smile that makes your heart beat a little faster. Jason opens the door and you follow him. Something in you is saying Jason doesn't want to help with this. Not in this way. You worry he's going this to hunt Dr. Light down himself. But, he went with for Jerry. He never tried to talk you out of it because he knew he couldn't and you know you can't talk him out of this. You needed it and Jason needs this, too. Plus, you aren’t completely sure that’s what his plan is.

You get to the comms lab, Gar quickly typing away as Jason leans against the table, facing Gar. His hands grip the edge as he waits for Gar to look at him. You stand off to the side of Gar's chair.

"Hey?" Gar questions, looking between the two of you.

"Hey." Jason greets a little too kindly.

"You okay?" Gar asks, this time his voice has a little bit of concern. He takes a quick glance at you and then brings his eyes back to Jason.

"Yeah, yeah, I've been knocked down before." Jason nods his head, looking to you.

"Look, uh, Dick just reacted he didn't mean anything by it." Gar says, his voice soft and you want to melt. He's so kind and sweet and caring. He never wants anyone to hurt anyone, physically or mentally. He is so good.

"Yeah, he did." Jason keeps his voice level and honest. He gains this tired grin. "Look, I know what I am. I'm a dirty little favor to Bruce. And probably why they reopened this place." Jason looks around the room. "Scrap heap for rejects." You roll your eyes at the comment before you go back to eyeing him carefully.

"I'm not a reject." Gar shakes his head, his voice displeased and hurt by the remark.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean you." Jason shakes his head before looking at you. "Or you." He looks back to Gar.

"Look, you're not a reject, either, Jason. We're...we're Titans." Gar gets this huge smile, one of accomplishment and pride.

You keep your eyes narrowed as the smile falls from Jason's face. He's manipulating Gar. It's the way he spoke with ease. The way he smiled that wreaked of bad intentions. And that's when you know for certain. He wants to find Dr. Light so he can go after him. Jason wants to help in a different way, meaning he wants to do it all himself. That's the only reason why he walked in here the way he did, saying what he said and how he said it. If he came in here, immediately asking to help, a red flag would have been triggered for Gar. 

Jason turns to look at the large screen. "Hey, can I help you?" Jason asks, gaining the smile back as he pushes off the table.

"Uh, sure?" Gar says, leaning forward and wheeling the chair closer to the controls. "You okay?" Gar asks, looking back to you. "You're really quiet."

"Oh, yeah." You nod, glancing between and Gar and Jason. "It's nothing, it's fine." You’re not gonna get in the middle of Jason trying to find Dr. Light and him going off to find him. Gar won’t let Jason help if you say anything.

Gar eyes you with a bit of suspicion but decides not to press. He moves back to the computer and looks at the large screen that Jason is now standing just inches from.

"I'm just looking for heat signatures. After Dr. Light absorbed all that energy, he's gotta be radiation hot." Gar explains.

"What's that?" Jason points to a blank spot on the map.

Gar zooms in. "Emergency exits on the Bayline train station. Underground, so impossible to read."

"Train tunnels must have underground heat sensors." Jason looks behind him to Gar.

"Good idea." Gar gets this interested smile as he wheels over to the right and starts typing. "I'm just gonna piggyback on the Bayline system." Gar says and just like that, where there was once a blank spot, it's now glowing red. A large smile comes to your face and this is why Dick should give him a chance. He is in fact clever. Jason lets out a single laugh, a large and proud smile on his face. "Holy shit." Gar beams as a similar laugh leaves his lips. Gar wheels back over to the center of the control panel. "You're amazing, Jason. I think we got him." Gar says, barely finishing his sentence before he pushes off the chair, immediately heading for the hallway.

"Woah, where ya going?" Jason calls after him, quickly catching up to Gar before he can leave.

"To tell Dick." Gar states as if Jason should have known.

"I got a better idea." Jason starts and you groan internally. This isn't good. "Look, why don't we go take a quick look to make sure." Jason offers and you’re shocked he isn't going off on his own. You definitely expected him to try and sneak out of here. "Cause if we're wrong, we'll look like assholes."

Gar nods his head, an unamused smile on his lips. "Yeah..." He stops nodding, snapping his eyes at Jason. "No." He quickly turns back around to the hallway.

"Gar! I need this." Jason pleads and Gar stops again. "To make things right with Dick, to show him what I can do. Okay? What we can do."

Gar walks back over to Jason. "He knows what you can do." Gar's voice is sympathetic as he shakes his head. "You're Batman's guy." Gar's voice is quieter this time but still drenched in the same sincerity.

"Was." Jason corrects him. You raise a brow. This is the first time he's thought of Robin in the past tense. "I'm not saying we go rogue." Jason explains. "We'll just do some visual verification, lay eyes on the guy and call Dick. Look, help me out Gar." Jason pleads with him and this time, it seems Jason is being sincere rather than manipulating him. But, you know Jason won't call Dick. "I could use a win."

Gar pauses and looks past Jason to you, your feet seeming to be glued to the floor. "What do you think?" Gar asks. "You haven't said anything."

You let out a sigh, Jason turning and his eyes boring into you. If you say Jason is right, that'll be it. The three of you will go and it could end poorly. If you say Gar is right, Jason will be mad and probably go anyway. At least, if all three of you are there, maybe something horrible won't happen. You kind of owe him anyway and you do kind of agree with Jason. But, you feel like you’re not choosing on if you should go after Dr. Light or tell Dick. Instead, you feel like you’re choosing between the boys with both of them looking at you and expecting you to agree with both of them.

"I dunno." Your voice holds reluctance. "I just..."

"Come on, Y/n." Jason pleads with you now. "You wanna prove it to Dick, too, right? You just said you're tired of being cooped up here. When we went after Jerry, as soon as you said we should call him, we did. It's the same thing."

You let out a sigh because you know that. "Stop kissing my ass." You roll your eyes. "I mean..." You look to Gar. "We could be heroes tonight." You raise your brow at him and there's a drop in Gar's expression but Jason's brightens. You don't want to sit around helping like this either. You want to do something and you do not want Jason to get himself killed tonight.

"Really?" Gar's voice is filled of disappointment. He thought you'd side with him, especially with how you were right after going after Jerry.

"I mean..." You pause. "I've fucked up with Dick, too and it does suck. If we could do this for him, maybe it'll prove that we're more than just those fuck ups. You haven't done anything, of course, but you're like...the responsible one." You state before looking to Jason. "No offense." You look back to Gar. "If we have you with us, maybe Dick will appreciate the three of us working together and being there for backup, ya know?"

Gar pauses and he's not winning this. He can tell by the looks in yours and Jason’s eyes, you're both a bit desperate to prove something. Jason just wants to prove that he is worth something. He's worth the time and the effort and the energy. He's meant to be Robin. You, Gar isn't really sure what you want to prove. But, it's the way your brows furrow and your voice quivers that he can tell it means something to you. Maybe you just want to prove you’re useful. You’re the only one no one who hasn’t been in some type of fight that isn't training. Everyone even saw Rose on the TV fighting. So, Gar caves despite his better judgment.

"Quick look, then we call Dick." Gar's voice is serious and stern, as if he's really taking the comment about being the responsible one to heart.

Jason smiles casually as he nods. "I promise."

"Let's get going then and hurry the fuck up." You walk past Jason.

"I'm gonna grab something real quick, I'll meet you guys outside." Jason says before walking past you, jogging down the hallway.

Gar gives you a look as the two of you head down the same hallway. "Siding with Jason?"

You let out a sigh. "I get it, ya know?" You shrug your shoulders. "Like...I dunno just wanting to be good enough." Your voice is quiet. "We all just want to be good enough for something, right? And I have these new powers and I'm going stir-crazy over it. I feel useless. I'm the only one who hasn't done anything. I beat up some basic ass psycho. He never even put up a fucking fight." You scoff. "I owe him, ya know?"

"You don't." Gar shakes his head. "And you are good enough. Dick knows you are." Gar urges and he doesn’t want you making bad decisions to prove something Dick already knows.

"It's different, Gar." You lick your lips. "Jason never tried to talk me out of going. He knew he couldn't do it. He knew I wouldn't listen to him. So, he came with to make sure I'd be okay and that I wouldn't kill him." You shake your head. "Uh....just...I don't want to get into the nitty-gritty of it all that night but," You look to the floor, watching as your shoes touch the floor. "He did a lot for me that night, like what you do." You nod at him and Gar gets it now.

Maybe you and Jason do flirt with each other and maybe there is something going on. He doesn't really know and a part of him would like to be left in ignorant bliss about it but ever since that night, something was different between you and Jason. Gar can't put his finger on it, but it seemed different. And now he knows why. You got to see a side of Jason no one else ever gets to see. Jason treats you like a person and you do him. Jason makes you feel like a person, an important person just like Gar does. It's just a little different.

Gar nods with understanding. "For the record," Gar lets out a sigh. "I think you're both good enough."

Heat creeps through your cheeks as your face softens. "Thank you, Gar." You feel the giddiness course through your veins. "You are also plenty good enough."

Gar chuckles softly. "Thanks, Y/n." Gar reaches his door, opening it. "Just grabbing my jacket."

"Yeah, I'm gonna grab a different hoodie." You jerk your head towards your room.

The two of you part ways to grab your different clothes. Gar goes with his red and white jacket while you grab a black athletic jacket. It's warm, jet-black, and it's a zip-up. You tie a belt around your waist, the belt lined with varying knives you’ve been given over the last few months from Dick. And you hide it under your hoodie. You know damn well this is going to get ugly and if Gar sees this, he'll back out and tell Dick. But, you aren't going to go unprepared. So, you hide it.

Once the three of you are outside, you head off to find Dr. Light. Jason, naturally showed up in his Robin suit. You and Gar aren’t even surprised. It's completely on brand. You think Jason would sleep in it if he could.

Once you reach the tunnels, that's when things start feeling a little off. You have a bad feeling in the pit of your stomach. Something just doesn't feel quite right here. A part of you thinks you’re just anxious over facing a villain. You know Jason isn't going to call Dick. He's going to put up a fight because that's just Jason. He's going against all odds to prove himself and this is a perfect opportunity. So, maybe you’re just anxious about that. But, you try to brush it off because you’re with the two boys who would never let anything happen to you.

"I thought this was reconnaissance only." Gar states as the three of you head down the stairs into the tunnels. "You're overdressed." Gar sounds tired and like he's done dealing with Jason's shit.

Jason laughs. "Exactly reconnaissance on a homicidal psychopath." The three of you stop walking. Jason leans against the railing on his side, facing you and Gar. You stand right in the middle of them. "Safety first."

"Yeah...that's why you wore the suit." You quip as you cross your arms over your chest.

Gar looks at the two of you before shaking his head. "I'm calling Dick." He says, completely through with now the both of you as he goes to head up the stairs.

"Gar, wait." You call but you keep your footing where you are.

"Yeah, come on, man." Jason whines. "Okay, you agreed to help me out. Please?"

"It'll be fine." You assure Gar with the easy shrug of your shoulders.

"See, Y/n’s on board." Jason points at you with an open palm. "Let's go." Jason jerks his head down the stairs.

Gar is so fed up with this already. He just gestures lazily out in front of him for Jason to take the lead again. The three of you walk down the stairs together, Jason feeling fantastic about himself, Gar wants to go home, and you’re stuck in between the two of them, literally and figuratively.

"Alright," Jason says as you reach the bottom of the stairs, all of you coming to a stop. "Let's uh, let's split up."

"Huh?" Gar hums, his voice high-pitched.

You scrunch your entire face at Jason, appalled. "Are you fucking kidding me?!"

"What?" Jason scoffs.

"Bad idea!" You groan.

"Man," Gar puts a hand on Jason's shoulder. "Don't you remember any of the horror movies we've watched?" There's a bit of panic in his voice.

"One of the easiest rules to remember is to not split up, Jason." You explain dramatically.

"You both wanna get out here fast, right?" Jason nods his head slowly and dramatically. "The three of us will get the job done in half the time." Jason says as he starts walking off.

"One of us definitely needs to go with him." You let out a sigh.

Gar's face is panicked but he manages a frown at you. "No way."

"Hey, I'm not going alone and you and I both know Jason functions strictly on reckless abandon. One of us has to be with him for safety measures." You gesture an open hand down the tunnel. "He's already left us." Honestly, you’re not happy about the whole splitting up thing but Jason seemed to make that decision for the three of you.

Gar lets out a groan. "Fine, okay." He puts a hand on your shoulder and squeezes softly. "I just, I got a bad feeling."

You nod but you choose not to put more worry into him. You don't like when he worries so much. "It'll be fine. You can turn into a tiger, I can melt people, Jason is very good at kicking ass and he does have the Robin suit which has weapons. We'll be fine." You rest a hand on Gar's shoulder and give him a gentle smile. The action was supposed to make him feel better but something about it doesn’t.

"Okay." He nods reluctantly.

"Meet you after." You give Gar a wink before turning and jogging down one of the tunnels to catch up with Jason.

You catch up with Jason, Jason hearing your pattering footsteps behind him. He knows it's you by the lightless of your steps.

"Can I fucking help you?" Jason quips.

"How-how did you know it was me?" You ask as you catch up to him, coming to a walking speed.

Jason lets out a laugh. "You're not fucking subtle." If anyone was going to follow him, it’d be you.

"Ha-ha." You mock him. "I came to make sure..." You pause as Jason looks at you, eyes narrowed and this is like when you went to beat up Jerry. Him in the Robin suit, you in street clothes, going to find a piece of shit. Maybe there's a bit of comfort in reckless abandon. "You don't kill him." You flash him a smirk.

There's a prideful smile across Jason's lips as he looks forward. He got the reference. He remembers telling you that that night.

"Gonna be able to pull me off him, huh?"

"Well," You shrug. "I was trained by the best, ya know?" You lift your hoodie so he can see the knives. "I, too, came a little overdressed for the occasion."

Jason lets out a laugh, his nose scrunching. "Yeah? And how's Gar feel about that?"

"Oh, well, he doesn't know." You let outa sigh, a guilty expression on your face. "He would have told Dick if he saw but I wasn't coming unprepared."

A triumphant smile pulls at Jason's lips as he boasts his chest. "Well, hey, I'm just glad you finally fucking admit I'm the best." Jason chortles.

"Oh, shut the fuck up." You roll your eyes. "Seriously, though," You let out a breath. "This is honestly stupid, like you know that, right?"

The smile falls. "No, he's a stupid fucking lightbulb."

"Uh-huh, yes, but the other Titans seem afraid of him. You don't think that's the least bit weird?" You raise.

"Could just be that Deathstroke is out there and his daughter is at the tower." Jason snarks.

"Fair." You let out a sigh, knowing that might be true. Everything you’ve heard about Dr. Light doesn’t sound too terrifying in terms of bad guys. "You don't seem to mind who Rose's dad is." You look to the ground for a split second, Jason catching it and a smirk comes to his face. Game time.

"Jealous?" He quips, looking at you and you think the mask makes him look a little goofy and he knows exactly what he's doing because you asked him the same thing last time.

"You fucking wish." You mock him and Jason lets out this laugh that bubbles your stomach. You wish he laughed more.

"If I did?" Jason continues and this time you look at him. He's looking straight ahead with a smirk that makes you want to kiss it right off his face. Shut him right up. But, you don't because you do like Gar.

You roll your eyes. "Alright, you fucking smartass."

"You always do that." Jason remarks, his voice drenched in confidence.

"Do what?" You glance to Jason.

"Deflect, backtrack. We go and back forth, and when you get stuck, you backtrack." Jason tilts his head to the right and then straights it back out with a shrug.

"Your point?" You raise, curious where he's going with this, but give him a teasing grin anyway.

Jason shrugs. "No point, just pointing it out." He is curious why you always do it. He wonders if it's because of Gar. Maybe you'd commit a bit more to the flirty banter, keep it going, if it weren't for Gar. Or maybe it's because it's him. He doesn't know but he definitely likes trying to figure you out.

"Mhm." You hum, not believing him. "Well? You and Rose?"

You don't even know why you’re pushing for an answer but you are. They've been hanging out a little more and you’re curious. Rose is cool and you like Rose. You swear it's not jealousy, that's not why you’re asking. You’re just curious.

"Why don't you tell me why you wanna know so bad?" Jason's brows are furrowed as he looks to you, his smirk turning taunting.

You wave a finger at him. "Why don't you tell me why you wanna know about Gar and me so bad?" You match the smirk with pride. 

Jason's eyes narrow at you, a smile pulling up as he licks his bottom lip and turns forward again. He wants to know but only if it's the answer he wants. He'd rather not have to hear that you like him and he likes you. That you're some sort of couple or you want them to be. You are Jason’s friend so he'd suck it up for you, of course, but he doesn't want to actively hear it. The idea of rejection makes his mouth grow sour. But, he's not going to tell you that.

"You first." Jason states and decides to throw the ball in your court.

You shrug. The issue with the two boys for you is that Gar makes you feel stable and safe, secure. He makes you happy and you feel...content. You feel this weird feeling of peace with him that you can't quite explain. In a way, you feel kind of like your old self, but a more mature version of it. It's not about the games or jokes between you, it's just very soft. It is warmth like a fireplace in a brutal winter. You feel like nothing bad or dangerous could ever be happen with Gar because of the peace that just radiates from him. You can't even figure it out which is fun. He makes you feel comfortable, something you really miss. But, then there's Jason.

Jason makes you feel like you’re on fire. Every part of you is bursting into flames around him and it doesn't even hurt, it's just exhilarating. It feels like the two of you could burn an entire city down together. And yet, you feel safe with him, too. There is not a single doubt in your mind that Jason would protect you against anything in the world. And you'd do the same for him. Jason has this sort of recklessness about him that you find intriguing. You don't know what he's gonna do or what he's thinking, something about that is endearing. Jason makes you feel alive with the fire in your belly and that brings you this sense of comfort you have craved for years. And you don't have to hide anything from him, not any of the trauma because Jason has already seen it all and went through it all. He just gets you. But, then you come back to Gar again and the idea of just being soft. The two boys have pros and cons, every person does, and you know what you want but you’re not sure if what you want meets what you need. So, you shrug.

"I mean, she's pretty and you seemed into her." You let the words roll off your tongue as if it's not a bitter sting in your throat.

Jason nods once. "Yeah, she is." He chuckles softly, it's fake though. "Don't know." Jason huffs. "Don't really know her, ya know?"

"Mhm, yeah." You nod your head. "I get it."

"You seem into Gar. He's definitely into you." Jason lets out a breath, deciding to make something up, piggybacking off your reasoning.

"Yeah..." You let out a huff, a sad smile on your lips. "He does sometimes but I don't know."

Your lack of mention about your feelings doesn't go unnoticed by Jason. But, he doesn't say anything. He doesn't want to know. "Oh, no, he does." Jason's eyes widen. "Everyone can fucking see it." He chortles a little more bitterly than he intended.

"Not to me." You scoff. You look to the ground and back to Jason who hasn't taken his eyes off of you. You look forward and that's when you see a little bit of light from the end of the tunnel. "What's that?" You jerk your head forward, Jason shining the flashlight in that direction.

"Found him." Jason smirks, more to himself than to you.

"So, we're calling Dick, right?" You raise a brow at him as you both keep walking.

Jason just looks at you and he knows you’re being facetious. "You gonna call him? Or you gonna let me fucking do this?"

You sigh. "I'm not gonna stop you." You shake your head. "By the time I go call Dick, it'll be over. Go do your thing, I'll be here if you need help and to make sure you don't kill him." You flash him a smile.

"Thanks." Jason's voice is sincere as he walks further ahead of you, ready to take out the walking, talking lightbulb.

Dr. Light is using his energy or taking energy from the tunnels, Jason and you can't quite tell. But, while doing that, it sees he also sucks the energy from Jason's flashlight, it dying while Jason bangs it with his hand. This gets Dr. Light's attention.

"What? The big kids weren't available?" Dr. Light asks once he's on his feet. "They sent Junior Robin." The whole tunnel goes dark and suddenly you’re anxious. Maybe you should have gone with Gar. "Maybe you're just a fanboy."

Jason throws his flashlight off to the side, clearly not having whatever bullshit Dr. Light is going to keep throwing at him. The back of your head starts throbbing, the throbbing echoing to the front. Dr. Light starts firing light bursts, you and Jason dodging out of the way quickly. The throbbing in your head gets louder and more aggressive. Dr. Light lets out a sinister snicker as you move to Jason, grabbing his arm to try and help him up. Dr. Light towers over you both until you get to your feet. You let go and Jason lunges at Dr. Light, punching him in the face with a yell. Dr. Light puts up a good fight and overpowers Jason, throwing Jason right into the wall of the tunnel. He grabs Jason by the collar and throws him to the ground before moving to you.

Your hands glow at your sides, eying Dr. Light. You have no intentions of fighting him today. This isn't exactly what you signed up for but hey, if Jason and you get this guy, that's bonus points for you.

"Some competition." Dr. Light cackles before shooting a light burst at you but you’re faster because of the throbbing. You were out of the way before the light burst even left Dr. Light.

"Maybe for you," You snark, looking just past him where Jason is kneeling, getting to his feet. "Not for us though." You shoot acid at him, just missing as he dodges and he laughs but as he's turning around, you’re already throwing a knife, the knife grazing his arm.

Dr. Light glares at you, feeling the blood trickle down his arm. He's not going easy on either of you now, he will not be beaten up by two little Tikes. But, Jason is back on his feet now, a look of determination and stubbornness that you can make out even in the dark tunnel.

"Hey, Lightbulb." Jason snarks, getting his attention. "Pick on someone your own fucking size."

Dr. Light takes the opportunity to shoot light bursts at Jason but Jason is also quicker and dodges them and blocks them with his cape. You officially think the cape is the coolest part of his suit. The light didn't do anything to Jason or his cape. It's actually really cool.

"Is it light like light beer light?" Jason quips.

"Shut the fuck up." Dr. Light yells, shooting more light bursts at Jason. You stand behind Dr. Light, letting Jason do his thing as promised and you have to admit, this guy is a fucking idiot. Jason and you have him cornered and he can't even focus on both of you. The older Titans are so scared of him...because?

"Fuck you!" Jason yells before he storms Dr. Light.

Jason starts punching him and Dr. Light can't get a single hit in. You stand back and let him just go for it. He let you go after Jerry, so you let him go after Dr. Light. You do, however, stand with a knife in your hand, the other hand glowing faintly as if waiting for this to go south. If Dr. Light suddenly gets this burst of energy, you want to be prepared to step in and help Jason. But, by the look of Jason grabbing him and pining Dr. Light to the ground, you don't think he'll need it.

"This Titan's back bitch." Jason snarls before going in for more punches to Dr. Light's face.

You move closer anyway as Jason's punches get more erratic and aggressive, getting the sense you'll have to pull him off. As you watch, you get a glimpse of how Jason felt that night. Based on things Jason has said, you know he views Jerry like he views any other villain, a waste of space. There is not a single part of you that thinks he was ever against you beating him up. He only pulled you off so you wouldn't be a murderer and have to live with the repercussion of that. And you get it because while watching him is actually pretty badass and, albeit, very attractive, it is worrisome.

He's aggressive and filled of fire. It's like he could go through this for hours and not get tired. You don't want him to be so angry anymore. He doesn't deserve to have so much aggression in him. He's better than that, he's worth more than that. And you want to stop him because there's this throbbing starting again in the back of your head. Dr. Light is on the ground, Jason has him, someone is coming. The throbbing intensifies, right at the base of your head and you know.

You spin around, only to be met with Deathstroke, holding his sword out a centimeter from your face. Your heart stops, your breath caught in your throat while time freezes. This is so much worse than Dr. Light and it’s only going to get worse. Jason is going to turn around and probably lose it. And Dr. Light starts cackling underneath Jason as Jason pauses for a breath.

Jason thinks he's just a twisted fuck for a second. Surely, this guy isn’t crazy enough to think getting the shit beat out of him is funny. That's the only logical explanation except that you haven't said a single word and you’re not in his eyesight anymore.

"Jay?" You call and your voice is so small, Jason's heart sinks.

He turns around slowly and there's Deathstroke with a sword to your face. Jason's entire heart feels like it's been ripped from his chest. It's nearly paralyzed him. He didn't prepare for this and suddenly, he's drowning in his own regret. He should have known better.

"Drop the knife." Deathstroke says calmly.

You suck in a breath, eyes locked on Deathstroke. Jason watches as his eyes are filled with panic and you drop the knife, the metal clanking against the concrete beneath you. You both are so fucked. Dr. Light gets the upper hand now, grabbing Jason by the cape and punching him. Jason lets out a yell as Dr. Light attacks him.

On instinct, you take a step back, turning around to face Dr. Light. You don’t make any further movements, knowing Deathstroke could stab you and kill you at any point. But, you’re not going to face Deathstroke while Dr. Light decides he can target Jason now.

"Just stop!" You yell out. "What? Guys can't lay a hand on the other Titans so you target us?" You yell to try and distract Dr. Light but it's no use.

Jason gets knocked out with one of the punches, Dr. Light considering it a job well done and before you can even process anything else, there’s a harsh hit to your head, sending you unconscious as well.

Gar heard Jason scream and you yelling something incoherent from the tunnel he went down. His heart and stomach drop right to his feet. He immediately starts sprinting to where the two of you went. He knew this was a bad idea. He knew the second Jason brought up splitting up, it would be a bad idea. And he had a worse feeling when you remained silent. It's unlike you to be quiet and he thought maybe it was because you agreed with him, that you should tell Dick. You just didn't want to argue with Jason and only agreed to it because you feel you owe him. But, now, he's thinking maybe it really was just that you wanted this, too and Gar is kicking himself because he should have known. He should have known the two of you going off together would only end in a disaster and his thoughts are confirmed when he reaches the tunnel you were in.

He finds Jason’s tossed flashlight, one of your knives, and two streaks of blood on the pavement. Gar is about to lose his mind in a fit of panic. You and Jason have been kidnapped.

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~ Let’s chat the beauty of ep 12 ~ 🤒✨

(All that matters in Titans S3 ep 12)

Im excited! Im jumping! Im dancing 💃🏽! It looks like the scenarios that we spoke about in my previous post here has come to fruition! I barely know where to begin. I have not had this feeling for the show in a very long time. For a majority of the 45 mins, I was practically glued to my screen because it seems that the writers have somehow managed to steer back into the right direction. But without further ado ~

It was quite refreshing to see the emotional strain that Dick’s death caused on both Rachel and Gar, especially when taking in to account that this series doesn’t necessarily know how to allow their characters to fully process the depths of their emotions. Usually we are met with lackluster, depictions of the scenarios which does ultimately affect the impact of the scene.

Yes! Gar finally transforms into another animal! Maybe the show runners are paying attention after all - because that tiger shtick was getting old pretty quickly.

After Gar transforms, he explains to Rachel that he believes that he can be more, which in this context is morse code for transforming. This was an excellent introduction to the next steps in his journey - that is learning to control his powers without solely limiting it to one animal.

Now moving onto Dick’s escapades in the pit. I have to say that I am much impressed by the creative decision that the writers have chosen for Dick to be the one to face his conflicts. Seeing that all he ever does is run off on his own anyway. All this is quite similar to Donna’s journey however, it was nice to see a glimpse of Dick’s future by him facing the brick in his mind.

As soon as I saw this scene of Dick’s subconscious in the form of Crane my initial thought was, where the hell they get that party city Joker costume from? 🤨 But when I finally decided to move past all of that, I realized that this was Dick’s boulder. In Dick’s eyes Jason was the reason he was shot, When Jason became Redhood the people of Gotham sought out a new hero to protect them, it was Jason’s fault that they had given up hope on the Titans. So of course he despised him!

However by succumbing to Crane’s pursuit , he allowed a slight opening for him to become the man that he had constantly attempted to run away from in the whole entirety of the series. A murderer.

It is like a movie before Dick’s eyes. Not only does he pay his father a visit in the woods, but in the corner of his eyes he spots a beautiful, wide eyed baby girl holding a red balloon. She shouts “daddy come here!” And I just melt into a puddle of tears.

This scene has basically solidified what we have all been proclaiming since the very beginning, Dickkory is endgame! And I couldn’t be happier 💃🏽However, the relevation also felt like someone rashly built an unexpected dam in the middle of the Hudson river… and you know what would happen if that ever did occur? The other side of it would eventually overflow, swallowing Roosevelt Island first, then the city!

Season 3 has little to no groundwork for the construction of Dick and Kory’s relationship, yet alone a baby! It is also pretty disappointing that the only solid evidence that we have to fall back on is the sex, which is good too! But it is missing the meat of the platter in between. Hopefully in season 4 we will see improvements in their dynamics.

Now why do I actually like Kom with red Starbolts? You know what, let me keep my mouth shut on that.

Also, its great to see Kory’s powers being put to good use - through Kom. I am completely flabbergasted and at this point I just want to see where the writers are going with this storyline. I love that she uses her powers to revive Conner who as we all know was taken down by Kryptonite. I wonder how Krypto was able to release himself.

This here is was what I’ve been waiting to hear ALL SEASON!

When Dick finally tells Jason that he will NEVER be a Titan I simply lost it! It’s about time that he was blunt and upfront with Jason about his and the teams sentiments. I can also respect how even though he rejected Jason’s offer, he aloowed himself to present him with another opportunity for redemption as Redhood. It was an amicable way for me to say goodbye to Jason’s Robin.

——————————————————————————-

The rivalry between Kom and Kory is another storyline that I wish we had further development in. There is no bad blood YET, but with Conner entering his sexy bad boy era we might be in for a bumpy ride folks!

When Kom decides to return back to Tamaran to reclaim her throne, Conner is evidently distraught. He pleads for her to remain on earth by his side, but knowing her nature her heart is already set on returning home on her ship.

Now I’ve seen many people argue that Conner is a simp etc… But in all actuality Conner is still learning to deal with human betrayal. We have to remember that he was crafted in a lab, meaning he was literally born just yesterday. Which is why I always believed that he was far too young for a mature woman like Kom, even if their relationship was as aesthetically pleasing as it was.

I was also a bit worried when Kory offers to join Kom on the journey. It takes Blackfire to remind her that her family - the Titans, are still on earth and even then she states nonchalantly, “you’re my family.” Now I do believe that there are many factors that play into the statement, but that’s an analysis for another day.

In the gif above you can see that Kory is completely taken aback when Conner disobeys her. I believe that here she begins to realize that its the Lex Luther side that is slowly inching out from her son. It was also another wasted opportunity because the comics Kory would’ve kicked his ass indefinitely for disobeying her, but I digress. 

I hate to say that I love this side of Connor, look at our sexy boy go!

And That is all that I have for this week’s episode! Let me know how you felt about the Dickkory “twist” and Conner’s new face 💜✨

[why-this-kolaveri-machi]

the wolf should’ve been afraid of me.

Titans 3.04

just under the wire! ... i hope.

like with the previous review, i’m typing this up as i see the episode. here we go!

spoilers ahead.

1. ... well. that was an interesting cold open.

1.25. i don’t know whether to admire this show’s restraint when it comes to gotham and its excesses, particularly arkham asylum. it’d be easy to go hammer and tongs, like suicide squad (2016) did, or any number of bat media did, at a tropey, colourful~~insanity~~ that can be quite damaging, casting mental illness in strangeness and criminality. it definitely shows gotham as... separate from the rest of the country, its own ecosystem of heroes and villains, a sort of rogue state. 

but that ecosystem is still human, with its heroes needing to clip parts of themselves away just to survive, growing old and needing to be recycled, its villains languishing in the same kinds of systems that fail everybody else who needs to be helped. it’s a quieter, tenser sort of wrongness: not strange enough that you can dissociate, but not close enough that you can completely empathise. gotham is its own creature.

1.5. i know that the reasoning behind this is more doylist than anything, but i’m so glad that joker was killed off with little fanfare right at the start of the season. he is the one man in the batverse that’s transcended its confines as this sort of ethereal boogeyman/eternal edgelord and to justify his presence in the series would mean giving him this tired, overblown importance and too much of a stab at colourful, tropey “madness” in this otherwise-subdued series. i wish all batmedia would follow suit and get rid of this fucker.

1.75. so jason is bucking scarecrow’s control! or reminding him of who exactly holds all the cards right now. circling back to what i talked about in the last review, it’s remarkable just how little time it’s been since jason’s “death” and he’s already got ‘minions’ and elaborately set up plans to track, break and kill the titans. just how long has he been planning this? when did he first look at WE weapons prototypes and think that’s something i can use to blow somebody up? and the most unsettling question: did he plan his own death at the hands of the joker just so that he could break batman?

at this point it’s obvious that the scarecrow at least started jason down this path, but it’s frightening just how far he’s travelled already.

1.8. aaagh, less than one minute in! i’ll shut up. 

2. conner washing his hands at the sink reminds me that he was directly in the line of explosion when hank got blown up and he’s probably got atomised hank-bits all over his skin that he’s desperately trying to wash off.

... you’re welcome.

2.25. conner, don’t you speak to gar fucking logan like that, sir, no!

2.3. if anything it’s the lex part of him that gave him the knowhow to recognise the weapon and build a de-activator for it. 

anyway, for that ‘half-breed’ and ‘talking tiger’ comment?

(i wish, tho, that we actually see conner more interested in the superman part of his legacy, like maybe listening to stories from gar, or even better, dick, so we get a better idea of the pressure he’s feeling to live up to that part of him and not the part that’s lex.)

((i talked about conner’s stages of moral development in his introductory episode last season, but i wonder if the next stage of his self-actualisation would be to further integrate the parts of himself and realise that they are only parts and he, conner, is an entirely different person unto himself that can make decisions on how to use what he has and what he knows. his superman abilities can be used to destroy. his lex knowledge can be used to save.))

3. oh dawn :((

3.25. is this the last we see of dawn and hank? i mean, we know donna is coming back; would it be a stretch to think they’ll try to have a go at resurrecting hank as well?

3.5. “deathstroke didn’t make us into killers.” good, because deathstroke didn’t make jason a killer either. there’s a missing step there you need to be looking for, dick. 

3.75. dick did try to break the cycle, step away from gotham, run from the possibility that he could turn into batman. it didn’t help; he couldn’t fully withdraw from his vigilante persona the same time he loathed it, and batman literally haunted him both asleep and awake. but maybe gotham doesn’t have to turn anybody into anything. maybe gotham has nothing to do with it at all. it’s about taking responsibility, realising some sacrifices are pure bullshit, and building an actual family instead of merely a team.

anyway: hugs!

(oh, also? mr “i hate flying”? i mean, there’s perfectly valid reasons to hate flying that’s not related to childhood trauma, but then again, this guy was literally a ‘flying grayson’ once. also also, remember that he also gets sea-sick. must’ve a lot of fun stories to tell.)

4. ooh that gar/kory confrontation was brief but cool!

listen, i have never seen a psychiatrist with that extravagant an office and SIR I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW HOW--

4.5. kory’s so unused to reaching out for help and it’s breaking my heart that HPG likely is some kind of impostor that’s maybe causing her symptoms in the first place. 

kory and dick have mostly been apart this season but it’s remarkable how their journeys have paralleled each other; kory processes her grief, isolation and existential dread into a determination to take care of this new family she has, no matter what it takes; dick does much the same, forging ahead with plans and solutions until he has no fuel left in him and spirals into a massive breakdown.

4.25. listen titans this really is a TERRIBLE continuity error. we aren’t goldfish; we can clearly remember that two minutes ago it was gar’s upper arm that was burned, not his forearm. COME ON.

“sensory deprivation tank” *SNORT*

anyway, gar is the BEST

4.5. i wonder where these visions of experimentation took place. was it on tamaran, or on earth, after she came to hunt down rachel/trigon and before she lost all her memories? is HPG a part of the scientist group that experimented on her? ... god, i hope not. i mean, i think he is, but it would be cool to have some positive therapist representation in media. 

5. you’d think the van transporting a dangerous supervillain that only batman could catch would be more secure but... i’m also not entirely surprised. 

5.15. i love dick gives ZERO shits about hiding himself or even ensuring scarecrow is adequately contained. just turns away after kidnapping him in BROAD DAYLIGHT and says ‘let’s go’. I LOVE THIS DUMBASS

6. lmao gar is having a really really shitty day SOMEONE GIVE THIS MAN A BREAK or just a goddamn story arc of his own

6.5. i’m really confused about the timeline here. so... sometime ago, kory came down to earth to hunt down trigon, yeah? at some further point down the line she and her sister were kidnapped and experimented on. THEN she somehow escapes but... loses her memory? a few months pass and then we see blackfire alive and well and free; she kills faddei, can impersonate other people, and is clearly seeking out kory. but now she’s still in the experiment facility...? what’s going on?

i’m not entirely surprised about the facility being mostly deserted. either the biggest investors in this project gave up on it and it was left to the most fanatic to carry on, or they were deliberately trying to lure kory and get her to free blackfire--expand the environs of the experiment, so to speak.

7. hopefully barbara is going to get something to do other than listen to various men give her Attitude

8. how do you terrorise a terrorist? well:

i love when dick is a scary-competent motherfucker.

8.25. ooooh, the attack on crane at arkham a ploy to get crane to blackgate? nice one dick, i didn’t even think of that. but why though? to protect crane from the titans? to intercept the van to blackgate and “rescue” him? seems likely--red hood was there, except dick got to crane quicker.

9. still reeeallly unclear about the komand’r situation. was komand’r captured after s2? is this all A TRAP?? if so, why are you stepping into the only thing that can contain you, kory????

9.25. so... definite parallels between dick/jason and kory/kom here. i’m just. i’m still. really confused. i’ll shut up now.

10. this may be my favourite dick look yet:

woodsman!dick in a beanie.

10.5. i unironically love how titans has made this bizarrely-devoted-to-his-moniker, toxin-spewing supervillain into a tamer version of hannibal, psychoanalysing his victims into submission. it’s of a piece with how inward looking titans is, the way all of its villains are obsessed with how our protagonists’ minds work, to the point where they would actually spend time inside of them. 

there are no big plots to end the world. no apocalypses or endgames here. these villains collect the titans’ insecurities like infinity stones. the way the titans defeat them is by achieving character growth--literally winning by the power of love. literally “the real superpower is the friends we made along the way”!

10.7. anyway, i’m betting dick is used to this bullshit from crane and is humouring him in the service of getting more information. the story about the wolf? an implicit threat, not to mention dick getting to control what crane knows about him and what methods he would use to manipulate him.

am i giving dick too much credit here? i don’t think so. he’s really impressed me so far this season.

10.75. like. there’s a real unreliable narrator vibe coming off with every person that talks about bruce (much like how the various members of the titans talked about jason’s motivations) and to buy into crane’s talk about bruce being a psychopath is to fall for the same manipulation that jason fell for. dick is the only person who hasn’t really psychoanalysed bruce this season, and i think some part of his detective brain is piecing things together into a bigger picture.

11. i’m glad kory rescued kom but did she have to kill the scientist?

(i mean, yeah, probably - the less people know that kom escaped the less likely they’re going to have the fucking govt on their doorstep, but still.)

11.5. dick’s gonna come back to wayne manor, stare straight at komand’r and go, well which room would you like? because the team might as well adopt ANOTHER person, yeah?

12. oh MAN that red hood/nightwing fight was AMAZING! and he did the thing! the boomerang escrima thing! i’m so delighted!

12.5. the anger and disbelief in dick’s voice when he says you told crane EVERYTHING?! tells me that he knew exactly what he was telling crane himself.

12.75. “everything you are is because of him” - oh that reminds me of halluci!bruce from last season. i hope we see halluci!bruce again--he is so vicious but so entertaining... so much more effective at tearing dick down than crane or jason combined. goes to show that dick’s biggest enemy is own fucking head.

12.8. oh no! dick’s shot! crane is in the wind with red hood! blackfire is now with the titans! i love it!

honestly this season’s pacing is such a big step up from the last couple. gold star, show.

[itsjustafia]

I just watched 3x11 of Titans…. And I have so many questions. Why is Scarecrow trying to replace Joker? He can’t!! Why is Jason such an indecisive little 💩?! And do they really think he’s redeemable? WTF was Dick thinking using kryptonite dust on Conner and Krypto? Did they really use Gar and Rachel to discover the Lazarus Pit so Dick can get his mind right? 😂 Where was Blackfire? Did she steal Kory’s fire powers and give her that vision so that she could guilt Kory into keeping them and be named the rightful heir to the throne on Tamaran? What is the endgame of this season and how do Donna and Tim fit in? Two more episodes to go!

The Scarecrow scenes were too much for me this episode. I skipped all of them except the opening one.

Jason hasn't been redeemable for me since episode 3. And with every new episode his redemption become more and more unlikely. Idk why the writers went that way if they're planning on giving him his own show; but I really don't care what happens to Jason. I just don't watch this show for him.

I think Rachel will revive Dick. And he may not be dead yet because we saw him trying to protect himself from the mob. Also, I thought each Lazarus Pit was like a one use type thing? I could be wrong. I don't want them to use it on him if he's dead but if it happens, it happens.

I think what we saw in 3x11 was the true story of what happened to Kory and Kom. I don't think Kom's lying. And I've seen some people say that Kom will turn evil once she learns the truth about what happened but I don't think she will. Their parents are already dead and Kory couldn't have known what really happened before her visions, so there's really no one to take revenge on. Also someone has to take the throne, and Kory has made it quite clear she doesn't want to so this is the only option. Kory will get what she wants and Kom will likely get what she's always wanted. I will say, I think that keeping Kom alive and as a "hero" allows for future storylines on Tamaran. Like we could still get the arranged marriage plot if Titans lasts for another few seasons.

No clue on how this will end. Titans has a bad track record with their finales (although I personally found s1's finale okay). I'm just hoping it's good.

[popeheyward]

*titans 3x08 spoilers*

im excited to see where gar’s storyline goes, especially after the jason stuff has been resolved. it looks like they’re gonna finally let him turn into different animals, which is exciting!!

im a dickory shipper but dickbabs is cute. justin the therapist is cute too honestly. i still think dickory is gonna be endgame (assuming titans gets more seasons) so im just gonna enjoy the content regardless.

dick making a sandwich beforehand is a big mood bc the food at formal events is always tiny af.

kom and conner are growing on me; them looking at their respective planets together was sweet. the direction they went w/ her was unexpected but i like it more than another villain storyline. if even half of what she told kory is true, then their parents weren’t great and it sounds like her killing them was more self-defense than murder. i feel like she still might betray them bc the titans writers are just Like That but im putting on my clown shoes and hoping she won’t lmfao.

i absolutely love tim! the way they incorporated him into the show was really interesting and reminiscent of the comics. jay lycurgo is killing it too!!

jason leaving crane and also punching him in the face was incredibly satisfying dsjlksdfklmsdfklm.

the goldfish on bab’s desk are my new favorite characters. <3

i was hoping dick and jason would be able to talk but then dick almost got run over by a car which is typical titans behavior lmao. at least he saw jason called for help.

it looks like kom’s slowly getting her powers back. it’s still not clear if that was her plan all along or if it’s just a happy accident. the purple aesthetic is cool so im glad <3

connor taking off the moment he saw kory was so FUNNY.

kory is having visions again but they aren’t coming from kom this time. maybe rachel in themyscira or hank/donna from the other side?? jason saw donna in episode 5 so im leaning towards her possibly trying to get kory’s attention now.

“are they coming from you?” “i was, um, fucking connor sleeping” mhmm 👀 

“isn’t this how gar ended up locked in a trunk with a black eye?” im glad someone remembers gar’s sacrifice.

kom and connor are as subtle as a brick klsdfkjldsfklj. kory 100% knows about them.

okay but what if the visions are coming from her parents? what if that was baby kory? 🥺

jason went to a...sex club (genuinely don’t know what to call it) just to pretend he was apologizing to hank and dawn. this scene being incredibly funny but emotional too is also typical titans behavior. on that same note, i really hope dick realizes jason wasn’t manipulating him or tricking him and that he really just wanted to go home.

KOM AND CONNER ARE CUTEEE.

dick “im just a regular guy doing regular things” grayson.

tim :( i can’t imagine they’d kill him. he’ll hopefully be able to tell the titans that crane was the one who shot him, not jason.

krypto was only in the episode for one (1) second but he’s a perfect boy. <3

the goldfish :(

that ending though?? gotham is about to pop off lmfao.

made this post because i promised @forlornmelody all of my titans thoughts but it got really long slkjsdfkljsdkl. will update this post when i watch the other two eps tomorrow!

[bluboothalassophile]

wow blu! your "The Wife & Ex-Husband" it's really good, very complex and a mess but really good, as always jay with his love for women, but he loves too much women hehe what have you got yourself in, jay? oh this is going to be fun, a little drama but can't wait to see/read the next chap. :))

Hello,

I’m glad you’ve enjoyed the first chapter of Forgot to Love You, I’ve actually got a whole story going for it for the time being so I hope you continue to enjoy it! Here’s the second chapter, also able to be found here:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/21209576/chapters/50517893

Not Ex-Husband...

Raven survived the rest of her night by the skin of her teeth, which was why she felt so utterly exhausted walking into her hotel room, peeling off her painful heels, and undoing her complicated Viking braids. Dolphin had had a lot of fun with Raven’s hair earlier today and she had just left her friend’s work in place. Gingerly peeling off the loose, soft, skimpy red dress she dropped it to the floor as she walked for her bed, collapsing on it.

Right now she was just immensely happy she hadn’t taken up her uncle’s offer on taking the guest room in his penthouse, she just wanted peace.

Rolling over she stared at the ceiling, pulling her covers up to her chin as she thought about tonight. Specifically her ex-husband was on her mind, it hadn’t been long ago when he had been on her mind last time.

‘So what’s a girl like you doing in a place like this?’ he had chuckled, pressing his glass to his bruised cheek.

‘Probably the same thing a place like this is doing in a guy like you,’ she mused.

‘Ooo! A Deadpool fan!’ he mused.

‘Obviously,’ she had laughed gesturing to her shirt; the crude drawing of Deadpool shooting Francis while screaming ‘Where’s Francis!?’

‘Well, love, it’s a pleasure to meet you,’ he offered his hand.

‘Raven,’ she had said as she shook his hand. His lips brushed her bruised and bloodied knuckles.

‘Jason,’ he smiled with his split lip. He was devilishly handsome.

It was only later, she thought bitterly, that she learned he was there trying to get over a heartbreak. His fiancée; Donna; had run off with his best man; Roy Harper, and Raven had watched it on the media. From the safety of her family ranch in New Mexico while she plotted out her next moves.

She had gone to Hawaii to study humpback whales with Garth. She had stayed with the Curry family for two years, and in that time she had mastered surfing, gotten over her heartbreak, lived on a boat, went swimming in the reefs, learned to snorkel, and scuba dive, and got to survive loosing her mom. Lucifer and Maze had been most sympathetic to her plight, but they didn’t know the whole story. Only that she had met a guy in New Zealand, fallen hard and fast for him and it was all a mistake. She had never told them she married the guy, or that she had married him in a drunken haze that she couldn’t remember.

Everyday since she had left was a struggle not to call Jason, not to turn around and go back to ruin his life. Raven couldn’t do that to the man, he was just too good for her. He didn’t even know how good he was, and that was what made it all the more painful in her mind. He didn’t know what she was capable of, or what she’d do, he didn’t know how far she could go to survive or how horrible she could truly be. They were friends, people who just clicked together like old friends, and it had worked. Jason had made her happy, and she knew she’d ruin him if she stayed. She ruined everything afterall.

Her phone buzzed which had her picking it up as she fought her heavy eyes and stared at the simple text from Jason.

-Can we grab some coffee tomorrow? We need to talk.

Simple, neat, to the point. He was always to the point. Raven looked at the clock, wincing at the time then she looked at the text again.

-Can’t do coffee in the morning, how about lunch?

She kicked herself for offering to spend more time with him, after all she was his vacation mistake.

-Sure, still like Thai?

-Yes.

-I got a place, want me to get you?

-Sure. I’m staying at LUX.

-I’ll txt before I come

-ok. Nite.

She dropped her phone before rolling over and staring out her window at the lights of LA. She had no idea why she was doing this. He was the ex-husband! They had parted, on good terms even. Though she supposed he had more questions for her because she had just left him with three things before she had run off.

Closing her eyes she saw that moment when she knew this was all a huge vacation mistake.

She had come rushing down to the lobby on the phone, negotiating with the airlines to get back to Colorado; Durango, where her mom was hospitalized. It had taken her an over a day, with multiple airlines, and her uncle fast tracking her money and getting her shortcuts, to get back stateside. Raven had jogged into the lobby to see him with a woman who looked like a gorgeous model.

The other woman; who she would later learn was Donna Troy, Princess of Greece, sister to the Queen; Diana Prince; was tall, almost as tall as Jason was, long curly black hair, and features of a Greek Goddess. Raven wanted to punch the woman in her stupid face, but knew she couldn’t, especially when the woman grabbed Jason, spun him to her and kissed him. Raven had bolted at that sight; because she knew she couldn’t handle that and she ran for a lawyer. Drawing up the divorce was quick and simple, because she and Jason had shared nothing and nothing was in each other’s name, she also laughed it off as a drunk mistake.

Once all that was taken care of, she had gone to her hotel, he wasn’t there, so she packed up. Leaving him with a brief note, the papers, and the ring she grabbed her bags and ran for the airport with her passport in hand. She had made it to her gate, barely, had her stuff mailed to her and made it to the States in the span of twenty-seven hours. Literally forty hours after she’d gotten the call from her aunt that her mom was in the hospital and her stepfather didn’t think her mom had much time.

~~~*~*~*~~~

Jason stood in his hotel, staring out at the city, smiling a bit at the text Raven had sent him saying night, and slipped it into his pocket.

He had never told anyone, but his grandfather, Alfred, that Raven leaving him had royally pissed him off. And even then, he wasn’t mad at her, he was mad with himself. Raven was, hands down, the best damn thing to ever happen to him at the second worst point in his entire life.

The day he was supposed to get married to Donna Troy, his childhood sweetheart, and first love, she runs into the room he was getting ready and demanded to know how he felt about her. Not the best timing, he got it, but him not giving her an immediate answer had her blurting out everything she felt. They’d been together for so long, even when they had both had wild affairs, or been broken up, that they just landed back together because it’s what everyone expected of them. They were expected of everyone, from around the world, and Donna said that she was tired of it. She wanted to know what they wanted, just them and not what the world wanted of them. Jason didn’t have an answer for that, because he had honestly never thought about it.

Donna Troy was his endgame.

Always had been.

When he was a PJ, when he was Bruce Wayne’s billionaire screw up, when he was the punk teenager, he had never thought about it. Donna Troy was just there, and they were the endgame for each other. Or so he had thought.

She had, in her frustrations and fury, blurted out that she’d been having an affair with his best friend; Roy Harper, for years, and that’s when he had started in on her. The only times he had ever dated anyone else or slept with anyone else was when he was certain they were not together. They both lost their tempers, she ran from the church in her wedding gown, with Roy in hand, and the media had exploded with it.

Jason, in his spiteful fury towards his family and fiancée had taken the honeymoon tickets and taken the trip. Two weeks into his running away attempt he had withdrawn a shit ton of cash, ditched his credit cards, and his former cellphone, taken his private passport, and left with nothing but his go-bag from France, and made his way to Australia. Somehow, and he still wasn’t entirely sure about how, he had landed in New Zealand, and the first night there; in some hole in the wall, divvy pub he had met Raven Rachel Roth.

She was in New Zealand, finishing her exchange program, studying to be a Marine Biologist to work with her best friend; Garth Curry; who was studying orca hunting patterns in New Zealand at the time. She loved to read; probably more than he did, which was a true feat in his mind; she adored New York pizza, rooted for the New York Mets, believed in Magic, loved dogs, and animals as a whole, wanted to help people, and was probably a bigger tea lover than Alfred. He thought her to be the most mesmerizing person he had ever met. She was beautiful, quiet, commanding and classy. She was classy as fuck when she was cursing like a sailor after kicking ass; she might be a pacifist, but she knew how to kick ass when the time called for it.

He found her to be the most interesting person he had ever met, though she was eerily quiet and gentle.

He didn’t know what it was about Raven, but they just clicked, it was like he had known her all his life with how they were. Which was the only reason when he had woken up with a naked Raven in his arms, and a marriage certificate he didn’t remember getting, that he didn’t freak out. While she finished her program, he sorted out his shit, picking up an odd job or two repairing boats, cars, and even a few planes. Raven hadn’t let him move in with her, her dorm was occupied by messy roommates, so he had let her live in his hotel room. He had been contemplating getting a flat so they could stay together and sort their shit out.

Though that all changed in the span of a day.

He’d been walking for his hotel when Donna had materialized in front of him. He had been texting Raven about dinner plans, intending to talk to her about their marriage and the next thing they should do. Her program was coming to a close, and he knew she had family stateside. He wanted her to meet his family, and he wondered if she wanted him to meet hers; she had talked animatedly about them, but also vaguely.

Donna was just standing there, dressed in cream, looking like a classic Greek goddess; not a single curl out of place as her dark eyes assessed him carefully for hints. He didn’t know what to think, brushing her off to try to escape, when she had pleaded to talk with him. Apparently, his family was freaking out because no one could find him, and she had hired a PI to track him down. Jason thought they were all being over dramatic, he was royally pissed, and hurt, and had every damn right to feel that way. Also humiliated, greatly humiliated.

But this was Donna and they were Donna and Jason so he couldn’t blow her off like he wanted to do. However, he would do anything to keep the Princess of Greece away from the woman he loved, because he did not need Donna to attack Raven. He knew she’d do it, Donna had done it to all his other exes in the past; Kara, Isabel, Artemis, Violet, so he wanted her as far away from Raven as he could get her. He’d been shocked when Donna had casually pulled him into a kiss; like muscle memory, but he didn’t kiss her back. Instead he had pushed her away and told her very firmly they weren’t do that again; ever, and if she thought differently, he’d happily escort her to the Greek Embassy and walk away. Jason had no problem walking away from her without talking to her, he had zero problems with it.

Instead they had walked, walked to a different, far more upscale hotel where his father was waiting for him with two of his siblings, and Alfred. Jason wanted to be pissed, he did, especially when he saw Roy, but he couldn’t find it in him to be pissed. He had Raven, and that didn’t make the world better, but it made him alright.

It had taken over a day of interrogation before his family was satisfied, he hadn’t been abducted, but they wanted to meet Raven. By the time he had finally gotten them to come around to the idea that he had made a friend who was not in the service with him, or someone they knew, and got them to want to meet her, she was gone. Hotel concierge had told him she had run out of here with her bags in a hurry for the airport, and that she looked panicked.

Jason had rushed up to their room to find nothing but the divorce papers, a note and the gaudy ring he had gotten her when he was drunk.

He had never felt so terrified as then, she was gone. Like she had never been there. All her things were packed and gone, not a stray piece of clothing or even the socks she’d stuff in between the couch cushions, a hoodie of his was also gone, and he didn’t know if she had done that intentionally or not. But whatever had called her off must’ve been important, because she’d have never left her program without reason. All he had was a note, the divorce papers, and that gaudy ring.

She had laughed at the ring, endlessly laughing and wore it on a chain around her neck, not on her finger; it was too big for her slim hands in her mind. Though she wore thousands of slim rings on her fingers, but not that one. That one was always worn around her neck on a chain. He hadn’t signed the divorce papers, he couldn’t, he didn’t know what went wrong with them to make her actually get them. The papers were straightforward, they had shared no assets, or joined households; they had been two independent people bound by a Catholic Captain; Daniel Cassidy, on a ship for whale watching, into the holy sacrament of marriage. Jason’s mom would’ve skinned him alive if she knew he had the divorce papers; as his mom had been Catholic and didn’t believe in divorce. That’s part of how he had become Bruce Wayne’s son actually.

But she was gone.

Her note was simple, straight to the point, and blunt.

Dear Jason,

Something’s come up, I must go, right now. I’m sorry. I don’t know what to do, but I feel this is for the best, it was a delight meeting you and I will always consider you my dearest of friends. But our time has come to an end, and I’m sorry. I wish you all the best. I’ll let you go, so I think it’s best you let me go.

Forever, with Love,

Raven

She had given him every out she thought he would need, but he couldn’t bring himself to sign those papers. Nor could he get rid of the note. He now wore her wedding ring on the chain, under his shirt, he kept her note neatly folded in his wallet, and the divorce papers in a folder in his suitcase; on the off chance they ran into each other and she truly wanted that bloody divorce.

He hadn’t looked for her, though he could easily track Garth down and demand to know where she was. Her line ‘I don’t know what to do’ always struck him as her way of saying she was scared, and she wanted to do this alone, the divorce was so she could do it alone. He wouldn’t file it though, he couldn’t.

With great reluctance he had followed his family back to Gotham. Dick was miffed when Jason bought a Mets mug, though Jason despised the Mets as the eternal rival of the Gotham Knights. Tim thought he was heartbroken over Donna and promptly tried to set him up on several dates with the help of Duke and Stephanie. Cass insisted he was sad and always tried to get him to talk about it. Damian thought he was dramatic and should take Donna back; which had had Jason punching his baby brother in the mouth, because he’d never go back to Donna. Terry, Helena, B Jr., and Tommy mostly thought he had a dark secret and tried to uncover it.

Jason had only told Alfred about Raven, and shown Alfred the photos, the proof that she existed; though she had tried to erase herself from his life pretty damn well. Alfred approved of her, and continuously tried to push him to hunt her down, even after Alfred had read the note. Jason thought Alfred had valid points, but he couldn’t.

Until Australia, he had actively not thought about Raven, until that terrifying call. Much to B’s frustrations, and his family’s fury, he had dropped everything at the drop of a hat and bolted. Alfred and Selina had arranged his flight.

She was gone by the time he got there, nary a trace of her.

It was B’s wife, Selina who had tracked her down and done a casual run in with her to confirm she was alive for him. Selina had run into Raven in Seattle, where she was at the time, dating a man named Garfield Logan, and living with a woman named Rose Wilson. She was alright, and in one piece, Jason had nearly collapsed at the news, but resolved to stay away from her so she could be happy. She was dating someone, she had built another little life for herself, and he wanted her happy.

It was the only time he had considered signing the divorce papers and letting her go fully.

He hadn’t though.

He could never figure out why. He could never get the nerve to call her, to reconnect, nor could he find it in him to sign the bloody divorce papers. He kind of hoped she’d find out and track him down to yell at him, but she hadn’t ever come. Five years and she had never come after him, it unnerved him until tonight.

Setting his drink aside he walked to his bed and sat on it as he thought over Raven and what seeing her had stirred up.

Tomorrow he would talk to her, tomorrow he would tell her they were not divorced and he would beg, on his hands and knees if he had to, beg her for a second chance. He would do whatever she wanted, but he didn’t want to let her go; never again.

Raven cursed God for creating morning, she cursed existence for it, and she cursed her Aunt for calling her about Passover plans, and if she’d make it to Long Island for the celebration with her grandfather and cousins. Raven had barely said sure before hanging up and cursing morning. Coffee was not her normal poison but after last night with Rose, Joe, Kyd, and Slade, she needed it. Glancing at the time she saw that it was almost time for lunch, cursing the existence of family, people, and general morning issues she stumbled into the shower. Once cleaned a bit, she twisted her hair up into a large bun pinned to her head with two heirloom hairpins. Her outfit was her Wright jersey, and jeans before texting her ex-husband she was ready for lunch with him while she sipped her coffee and walked out of LUX. Luci and Maze were not awake yet, so she didn’t have to deal with their interrogation; yet.

Jason texted that he’d be there in fifteen.

She just hummed to herself and sipped her coffee; wishing for the millionth time it was November or October so she could have pumpkin spice flavoring. But alas, it was February and not the time of year for pumpkin flavoring.

Jason pulled up in a black Audi, she got in before he could get the door for her and she sunk into the warm seat. Though she had a leather jacket, and didn’t get cold, she would admit she was exhausted.

“You look like death warmed over,” he remarked which had her glaring at him.

“Do you realize what a pain in the ass, not one, but three bridezillas are!?” she demanded. “I was up until three in the morning just trying to diffuse the flower crisis between Dad, Kyd and Joe! Then Alice calls me at eleven in the morning wanting to know if I’ll be home for Passover.”

“Really?”

“Wherever we’re going better have copious amounts of coffee because after lunch I have to go deal with the tailor.”

“Then I’ll take us someplace else,” he promised. “No Thai.”

“I want this wedding over with!” she whined.

“Could be a shotgun wedding they don’t remember,” he chuckled.

“That’s not going to happen,” she sighed regretfully. She was insanely happy for Joe and Kyd; especially because Joe had been so nervous about coming out as Pansexual, but Slade, Rose, Grant, and her had been prepared to be nothing but supportive; she still had the Pride banners shoved in her closet from the parade she did with Joe and Kyd last year. Though she was miffed at a lesbian trying to get into her pants; that had gotten ugly.

“Well, not everyone can be as fortunate as us,” he teased.

“Everyone else remembers their wedding,” she pointed out. “Also, if my family found out I got married but didn’t have a huge, traditional Jewish wedding, I think they’d perish!”

“You’re Jewish?”

“I love bacon,” she deadpanned.

He laughed. She forgotten how beautiful his laugh was; it wasn’t fair that he got to show up and remind her how beautiful and amazing he was. And it wasn’t fair that she couldn’t have him, Donna Troy was dating him again according to the tabloids; and she hated the Princess for it. But Jason deserved the best, and that was not her.

“Yes, my family is Jewish, my grandfather survived Dachau, his family was set to Auschwitz,” Raven answered.

“Damn, I didn’t know,” he said softly, his hand caught hers and his thumb gently rubbed her knuckles. “My mom was Irish Catholic,” he informed her.

“I bet our wedding would’ve been a riot then,” she decided with a soft laugh.

“Probably,” he chuckled. She withdrew her hand and wrapped it around her warm travel mug. “So the wedding, I didn’t know you had a brother.”

“I have two step brothers, and a step sister,” she answered honestly. “I have an adopted brother, too.”

He nodded as he drove them onto the freeway and started heading north.

“So how’ve you been Jason?”

“Fine, been nonstop work since New Zealand, I’m taking over the West Coast branch, Tim’s taking over the East Coast,” he answered. “I also have some international business I take care of.”

“That’s great.”

“I am just thankful to be moving away from my family finally,” he chuckled.

“You adore them and you know it.”

“That’s not the point, they’re overwhelming, other than Cat and Alfred.”

“Cat and Alfred?”

“Sorry, Selina is B’s second wife, and we call her Cat because she loves cats, and Alfred is kind of our grandfather.”

“Cool.”

“How about you?”

“Well, I move a lot, Garth and I still work together, with my brother Victor,” she answered. “My family gripes a lot that I’m not around enough because we travel all the time, but they get it. They’re supportive, even if that means a lot of Facetime calls.”

“That’s great,” he smiled; she saw it was a genuine smile which had her shyly returning it.

“So what about you? Anyone special?” she asked.

“Special?”

“Dating! I see the tabloids Jay,” she chuckled. “So you and Donna are you rebounding to serious again?” she questioned. She hated asking, mainly cause she still wanted to claw Donna’s eyes out, but the woman was a Princess, she was more than worthy for Jason Todd.

Raven didn’t notice his knuckles whitening on the wheel as they both stared at the road.

“No,” he answered softly. “I will never get serious with Donna again. We’re… we’re just trying to be friends, and it’s not easy,” he admitted.

“Being friends with exes is never easy,” Raven assured him.

“What about you?”

“Me?”

“You know, dating,” he chuckled.

She grimaced remembering her few failed attempts at dating. “No, not really. The last guy I dated had asked me out to make my sister jealous; it worked, they’ve been together for two years. And there’ve been a few dates, here and there, but no sparks or attraction,” she shrugged.

She didn’t notice him relax a little.

“Shame,” he decided neutrally.

“You know what I miss, and I blame you entirely for it,” she asked.

“What?”

“Sex,” she blurted out. He roared with laughter as they sped down the freeway.

“Really!?”

“Before you I had never had sex, because of you I have impossibly high standards for sex that no one will ever be able to meet!” she whined.

“I can solve that,” he offered.

“Maybe,” she shrugged dismissively; it’d never happen. Not with him. He was a galaxy away from her league.

“I missed you Rae,” he chuckled.

“Same,” she admitted with a smile. “So where are we going?”

“A place with sandwiches and coffee,” he promised.

“Oh Thank God,” she moaned. “Sorry, I haven’t eaten since yesterday afternoon, and I didn’t get a great nights sleep.”

“No need to explain Rae,” he promised.

“Well, it’s just…” she sighed as she rubbed her brow. This wasn’t about coffee and sandwiches with her ex-husband. “This isn’t just about having lunch with you Jason.”

“I kind of figured.”

“You did?” her head snapped over to study his relaxed profile.

“It’s not just lunch for me either Rae,” he said and looked over at her with a serious, guarded expression.

“I’m sorry,” she murmured. “For… for everything,” she sighed.

“No,” he said so harshly and firmly she just stared dumbly at him.

“What?”

“You have no reason to be sorry, for any of this,” he said. “You tried to do the right thing, I’m sorry I didn’t come after you five years ago so we could talk, a real talk, about this.”

“I…”

“No, let me say this because you talked last night and I need to say this.”

“Okay.”

“You met me after Donna had left me at the altar and ran off with my best friend, and brother in arms. And you helped me through a truly terrible, humiliating point in my life, and I never thanked you for that. You didn’t push or pry or try to make me feel things I didn’t, or were expect to. You were there, you were my friend, my wife, and I’m sorry I didn’t make you feel valued enough or safe enough to come to me for help when you needed it. I’m sorry you felt the need to run off on your own rather than come to me. And I’m sorry you saw Donna kiss me, and I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright, Jason, it was a vacation mistake,” she shrugged.

“No, it’s not alright, Raven,” he said it firmly. “Donna was the mistake. You were not.”

“She’s the Princess of Greece, Jason, I’m… me, I’m the mistake,” she said confidently. She knew she was the mistake here, no way in a million years he’d have even stuck with her once they got back to reality, and she went trapezing off with Garth and Vic to study the ocean he’d realize what a terrible mistake they were.

“Rae,” he spoke softly and she glanced back at him. “You are the best damn thing that has ever happened to me. And we’re here.”

“I dibs the tuna sandwich,” she warned him as they got out of the car. He got the door for her, she nodded as she passed. He got them a table, it was only after the starstruck waitress left that he turned his attention back on her.

“Tuna is all mine,” he decided.

“That’s declaring war,” she warned.

“Perhaps,” he shrugged.

“How about we split two sandwiches, I’ll give you half my tuna for the crabcake!”

“Deal!”

“Excellent,” she chuckled. “And Jason, just so you know, you don’t have to lie to make me feel better about us.”

“I’m not lying,” he said.

“Sure you’re not.” She snorted and smiled as she put the menu aside and sipped her coffee. She still wanted pumpkin spice, she cursed autumn for being so far away.

“Rae, you and I, it was the best damn thing to happen to me,” he stated it firmly.

“You are surprisingly happy about us for an ex-husband, are you all this way or just you exclusively?”

“Well, it’s not an ex-husband thing, because that’s kind of what we’re here to talk about,” he said.

“How is it not an ex-husband thing?”

“Kind of like how this isn’t an ex-wife meeting,” he answered. “I never signed the papers Raven.”

She felt all the blood drain from her face as the waitress came over to take their order. He placed the order and waited for her to respond.

“You… you what!?” she sputtered dumbly.

“Never signed them, Rae,” he answered. “So technically, we’re husband and wife.”

“But… but…” she stammered dumbly not knowing what to say to that. “I… WHY!?” she hissed.

“Because,” he answered.

“That’s not a reason to stay married to a person Jason! Especially when I’ve tried dating other people!” she hissed. She was so going to Hell for adultery now.

“No, you didn’t know,” he answered. “But I couldn’t sign them or file them.”

“You should! You should right now!” she insisted.

“No,” he repeated calmly.

“Jason!” she hissed.

“Raven.”

“This is SERIOUS! If you don’t sign those papers, and people find out that… and… we’ll, the media will crucify you! And your family will join them!” she hissed.

“Let them,” he shrugged. “I was serious Rae.”

“I don’t even remember us getting married!”

“Neither do I, but nonetheless, we are,” he said levelly.

She groaned as she hid her face in her hands and wanted to tear her hair out of her head in frustration now.

“Rae, love, look at me,” he pleaded. She glared at him through the fringes of hair now cascading around her face. Oh she was pissed, the hardest thing she had ever had to do, even harder than saying goodbye to her mother or watching her family fall apart because of her biological father, was saying goodbye to the man she had married. And worse, she had known it was the right thing to do. Drunken mistakes should not be consequences for life, and she had been able to fix theirs with a simple divorce!

“I’m… I fixed our mistake! I did everything to fix it!” she snapped.

“I couldn’t sign the papers because I never could view it as a mistake,” he answered levelly. “And if you’re willing, I would like to try again.”

“Oh no,” she gasped. She could feel her chest tightening in panic, as her heart slammed in her ribs. “No. I… No, I can’t do this, no.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m a mistake Jason!” she snapped. “I’m a mistake and this marriage between us, only happened because we were drunk off our asses and, on a boat, somehow; and I still don’t know how we got on the boat because the last thing I remember is the pub! Also, you’re… you were, are, engaged to a Princess, how the hell can I compete with that! You’re American Royalty, Jason! Your Dad is the richest man in the world, and I… I’m me!” she sputtered.

“You loved me when you thought I was just Jason Todd, mechanic,” he pointed out.

“This isn’t about the money Jason,” she sighed.

“Then what’s it about?”

“You deserve better than me,” she stated.

“I think it’s the other way around love,” he said softly. “The day you left, the day Donna came to take me home, I was coming home to you, to talk to you about us getting a flat, and seeing where you wanted to go from New Zealand. If Donna hadn’t intercepted me, I’d have come back with you, immediately, no questions asked, no expectations. You’re my wife Raven.”

“Doesn’t mean we should be together!” she snapped.

“I think you and I got married for a reason, drunk or not, and I think we should give this a real shot,” he said firmly.

“Jason…”

“I would have called you five years ago if I wasn’t so damn scared, or hurt, and I would’ve come for you immediately, always regretted that I didn’t. So please, please, I’ll do anything for a second shot with you,” he said softly.

“Jason, sign the papers,” she pleaded. “You’ll… you deserve to be happy; I don’t make people happy.”

“How about, we date, try dating, and if it doesn’t work out, I’ll sign the papers,” he bartered.

Raven stared at him; she didn’t know what to make of that.

“A date?”

“Can’t a man ask his wife on a date?”

“I…”

“We didn’t do the whole dating thing the first time around, and I would like to remedee that this time,” he said levelly.

“We skipped straight to the marriage, and wild sex,” she muttered as they were served. They both waited for the waitress to leaven before she automatically swiped half his sandwich and he took half of hers.

“I missed the sex too,” he chuckled. “You broke my standards, no one else compares.”

“Oh Thank God That’s Ruined For You Too,” she laughed as she took a bite of her tuna sandwich.

“You ruined many things Rae, like tea, I still can’t figure out how you made that one tea to make me sleep, but I can’t remake it for the life of me. I’ve almost cried craving it,” he chuckled.

“You ruined waffles for me,” she warned. “I mean no one can make them right, I cried on my kitchen floor one morning I wanted them so badly. The chocolate chip ones with strawberries,” she moaned at the mere memory.

“Good book conversations,” he stated. “I joined a book club I was so desperate to talk books, intelligently, turns out that was mostly a gossip group; all four of the ones I joined.”

“Ha!” she stuck her tongue out at him for that, he had told them to join a book club when they had first married and enjoyed talking books. “I told you they weren’t what you thought!”

“Some of them must be actual book clubs but I haven’t found one.”

“Could be because you’re Jason Todd.”

“Very possible.”

“But we don’t have to be married to do things like that, I can give you the tea recipe and we can be friends who talk books,” she offered.

“Rae, it’s not just about that,” he chuckled.

“Sure it is, I’ll be your friend, but I don’t think I should be your wife,” she said firmly.

“Little bird, I’m not divorcing you, besides you need to keep the insurance,” he said firmly.

“About that, I should pay you back.”

“Don’t you dare,” he warned lowly. She stared at his fierce, guarded expression. “And don’t even think about changing me from your emergency contact!”

~~~*~*~*~~~

He didn’t want her to pay him back for taking care of her, she would never understand how much she had taken care of him. And when she brought it up it reminded him how neatly she had erased herself from his life, how she had promised to remove him as her emergency contact. That had actually been a fight between them when they were barely friends. A bar fight landed him in the hospital, and he had to call someone, apparently, they were going to call his grandfather when he convinced them to call the girl he had hooked up with the night before, Raven. Raven had been shocked but had come to help him get discharged, and the ensuing arguments had led to them agreeing to be each other’s emergency contact while they were in New Zealand. The wedding had happened after that by about a week.

“I…”

“You terrified me, Rae,” he stated. “I came back to the hotel room and everything of you was gone, including our photos. You just… you erased yourself from my life, and I swear I couldn’t take it if you removed me as your emergency contact. I’m your husband, I deserve to know if you’re in trouble.”

“Ex-husband.”

“I haven’t signed the papers, and they’re safely hidden away so you can’t make me,” he pointed out. He felt a bit smug about that statement as she glared at him.

“I signed them!”

“I know, and it still terrifies me that you could do it so easily,” he stated. He saw her flinch, and he knew. Just one look at her and he knew, that it hadn’t been easy for her. None of this was easy, but he got the sense that this was also his fault for waiting five years. He hadn’t lost her yet, but he got a feeling that he was precariously close to if he wasn’t careful. There was very little about her, what made her make her decisions, that he actually knew and if he wasn’t careful he knew he could lose her. She already seemed to hold a low opinion of her value, and she seemed skittish about having someone in her life who wasn’t family. Though the skittish aspect of her was always there, if he moved to quickly, or raised his voice a certain amount she’d jump, she’d flinch, and he remembered her nightmares, though very few, were very intense. Something had happened to her, before he had met her, something that made her skittish; made her this way, and he should’ve chased her five years ago to not let it manifest further, but he hadn’t. Things to add to his list of regrets.

“I did what I thought was best, for us, as people in a situation we didn’t sign up for.”

“I have a marriage certificate that says we did sign up for this.”

“Jason, I… I’m not the best person for someone like you,” she started.

“I think you’re the best person I’ve ever met, Raven.”

“Jason…” she sighed as she dragged her hand through her hair.

“Can you please just consider giving us a shot, a real shot?” he asked.

“I…”

“I would like to take you, not my guilt stricken wife, out,” he reiterated it. “I would like to take you out.”

“Like a hit or a date?”

“I’ll leave that to be a surprise.”

“I don’t like surprises,” she muttered.

“Well, then we’re a hell of a surprise,” he mused. “Please Rae. I would like to take my beautiful, estranged wife out on a date, have fun, and no expectations.”

“I gave you the divorce papers so we wouldn’t have expectations.”

“You gave us an out, and I’m not out yet,” he said levelly.

“Fine,” she threw up her hands in defeat. “I’ll go on a date with my idiotic ex-husband.”

He smiled in triumph and stole one of her fries.

“HEY! Hands off!” she snapped as she snatched her fry basket up.

“We’re married, we’re supposed to share.”

“Only until you sign those damn papers!”

“Never,” he chuckled. “So when are you free from family and wedding obligations?”

“You are not going to my brother’s wedding, just so we’re clear about this. You are not going,” she stated that firmly. There was a bit of hurt in his heart that she wasn’t even going to offer it as an option, but he was sure that in time he’d win her over. Doing so at her brother’s wedding was likely too much pressure, and would require them explaining that they were married; which he didn’t know if her family would take that well. Going off Lucifer’s reaction he would bet they didn’t even know.

“That’s fine,” he nodded.

“I’m free after the wedding. The wedding is February fourteenth,” she sighed.

“So can I take you for dinner on February fifteenth?” he asked levelly.

“Fine,” she nodded. “But I’m leaving with Garth and Dolphin on the twentieth, we’re meeting up with Vic on a job.”

“Where’s the job?”

“We’re going back to Hawaii to research reefs. Garth’s family is there and they want to be close to his family,” she shrugged.

“I thought he studied whales.”

“Well, he’s a marine biologist, there’s a solid job for him in Hawaii, same for me, and Vic’s already there, so we’re going there. Dolphin also…” she clamped her mouth shut then.

“Also what?”

“She’s pregnant, she wants to be close to his family, but I’m not supposed to tell anyone that!” she muttered.

“Congratulations to Dolphin and Garth.”

“They’re excited, I’m telling my family I’m leaving after the wedding,” she said.

He nodded, he was already trying to calculate if he could afford to head of to Hawaii for a bit to continue wooing his reluctant wife.

“I’m still going to call and text you,” he informed her.

“You don’t have to.”

“We’re friends, it’s about time we act it. And we’re husband and wife.”

“Fine.” She rolled her eyes, and he smiled; this was going to take a lot of work. That was fine by him though.

[takaraphoenix]

Here’s a post I held back because I wanted to see the whole season fold out to see if there was a very specific goal to it. Now that I’ve seen it all, I gotta make this post.

The outfall of the Titans was utter bullshit.

It was far too blown out of proportions. The writers should have gotten a more valid reason to justify this extreme outfall.

But... “instead of already being dead when I arrived, he only died later protecting me”, that... that’s a half-truth. Sure. But also a “it hurts me very much and I feel guilty since he died to protect me, personally” kind of excusable lie because well, that shit hurts.

Had the truth actually been something along the lines of... Dick directly causing some form of accident that led to Jericho’s death? But Dick had come clean to Jericho about everything, Jericho was there on his own account, had made an informed decision and a choice and he had died to protect Dick.

Like, Rose running out, being angry? 100% justified. He’s her brother, she has the right to be angry.

Hank, Dawn and Donna being angry that they had been lied to for years, additionally also having known Jericho personally? Absolutely understandable.

But Raven and Jason were just absolute bullshit and actually... contradictive to their previous behavior?

In fact, it was contradictive to Raven’s following characterization too.

She first and foremost latched onto Dick. Her three anchor points are Dick, Gar and Kory. They’re the people she knows, closely, and the people she trusts.

She did not know Jericho at all. And she left, angry, because Dick had never opened up and told them anything (calling out how Donna and the others at least got half-truths) but... this... how do you complain about someone not opening up to you and then leaving directly when he starts opening up to you...? That... doesn’t check out.

Neither does leaving with Donna, when all three of her primary people of reference - Dick, Kory and Gar - were still at the tower. She... doesn’t even know Donna? They only really met when everyone came to save Raven and they didn’t exactly get to talk a lot with each other and then Donna basically already fucked off again after and... we weren’t exactly shown big Donna-Rachel bonding when the old Titans returned to San Francisco.

What I’m saying is that if Kory had left first and Rachel had decided to go with her? Yes. Okay. Because Kory had become her main female role model and the slight feeling of betrayal from Dick would have pushed her toward picking Kory.

But when all three of her people are still present in the tower... there really was nothing to actually justify pushing Rachel into leaving the tower...? Sure, Kory ended up leaving too, but for her sister, not because of what Dick had just confessed. And Gar didn’t even consider quitting. Their reactions were proportional to the situation at hand; Rachel’s reaction was very oddly blown out of proportions.

And what even was that with Jason...?

Up until that very scene, Jason had been depicted as a... very invested Dick Grayson fanboy. He had been the one character most enthusiastic about becoming a Titan. He had... he had literally gone onto a dangerous solo mission, nearly getting himself, Gar and Dick killed on the way, mere days ago because he had decided not to communicate...?

But his... basically, his idol, opening up to him - especially first of everyone, Dick told Jason - and admitting how a mission had gone out of hand...? How is that a justification to turn your back on your idol, to turn your back on the whole team and to play angry, angsty, horny teenager for the rest of the season...?

Like, I understand why - from the overall meta writers perspective - it happened, because the writers wanted to isolate Dick to make him go to prison on his merry journey of self-discovery.

But you... you can’t just take the endgame and make up a flimsy way of getting there? You have to build a solid lead up to that. And... they really didn’t do that. They should have invested in a more believable reason for everyone to leave, not just a valid reason for half of them and uh I mean mmmh I guess Rachel is now a Rebellious Teen who is pouty with dad for not telling the whole truth and uuuuuuh yeah no I got nothing Jason just wants to fuck Rose let’s go with that is that enough...?

It’s... even more disappointing on Jason’s end, because at least Rachel came back around to status quo - being that she is incredibly emotionally invested in her family and especially in Dick and is willing to move heaven and Earth to protect them and keep them safe and together; you know, her entire characterization throughout the show aside from when she went pouty and ran away for a little bit there to allow Nightwing’s Origins to happen.

But Jason just... stays... away? Even after he gets texted from that the team needs him? And he somehow didn’t catch the news about, you know, Dick in prison and all that? Even Rose went “No the Titans need us”, but he, of all people, just fucks off like that...?

That just... That just contradicts the way they portrayed the character so far and sure, people change. But so sudden and over such a flimsy excuse...? It’d have needed a more solid foundation for this incredibly huge change of heart on his part.

This just makes me rather mad, particularly considering that Dick being “too good to majorly screw up” isn’t even a problem for the writers? Like, if they were to try and portray him in the light of a gloriously goody goody-two-shoes whose biggest misdeed is a half-truth about how a fellow hero sacrificed himself to save Dick’s life...? Oookay fiiine, but... that is literally followed by Dick just straight-up abandoning Gar and Conner, two minors to whom he had - willingly or not - become the primary caretaker, causing the kids to get abducted and brainwashed. Like. That. That kind of behavior would absolutely be a valid justification for Rachel, who loves Gar a great deal, to just walk out angrily and for Jason, who admires Dick a great deal, to feel let down by his hero. But! That is not the order things happened in! And that is the infuriating part for me. Because the writers prove to be capable of writing a huge fuck up scenario. So... why not come up with a properly huge fuck-up scenario to justify this incredibly important event?

And I’m not trying to down-play Jericho’s not-actually-fully-dead death here. That was... horrific and absolutely understandable that it led to the break-up of the original Titans and I completely understand why Dick not telling the original Titans the full truth about it all would leave them feeling betrayed.

But for the new Titans...? If they were now actually told the truth, the whole truth, how... how’s that a reason for them to leave? A guy you didn’t even know, who was fully aware of every aspect of what he was getting into, made the choice to sacrifice himself to save a person who right now means a lot to you and is part of your team and this sacrifice clearly scared the person you care about a lot. So... let’s just angrily leave now that he finally started to open up to you, huh.

If he hadn’t... I may have more understanding for Rachel and Jason leaving. If Dick had continued like he did earlier this season, completely keeping the new Titans out of the loop, only, if at all, sharing with the old Titans, or trying to do everything on his own. If Dick had decided to come clean, but very specifically only to Hank, Dawn and Donna, and if Jason and Rachel, having once again been excluded from something, had then seen the three angrily storm out...? I think I would have bought that as a reason to quit, at least over how it actually played out.

[larathia]

What bothers me about the Titans season finale is, in fact, the same thing that bothers me about the Avengers Infinity War/Endgame storyline: the sacrifices are all women.

Avengers? The only two characters that are Totally Really Forever Dead, Can’t Come Back Ever, are Gamora and Black Widow. Cast is full of male superheros. The sacrifices? Both women. 

Same thing with Titans. Cast full of dudes. How does the season end? With the only two Actually Superpowered As Of The End of the Season women dead or leaving. Wondergirl could take Connor’s punches straight on without so much as needing a break. Raven could fix actual literal somebody-took-part-of-his-skull-off-and-applied-electrodes brain damage by using her magic. And at the end of the episode, Donna Troy is dead and Rachel is going with her body.

Titans still has female heroes, but Dove is unpowered and Kori is currently de-powered, and they’re pretty heftily outnumbered.

I’d like to be able to say ‘well that’s just how the story shook out’, but as much as I love the superhero genre, I’m familiar with its flaws as well. And it’s always the female heroes that ultimately get this kind of treatment.

[i-am-fran]

My thoughts after ep 9.09

My thoughts on season 9 of #Suits ahead of the series finale:

So today I saw 9.09 and I think now is the right time to write a little piece about my thoughts and wishes and expectations. Why now? During the past 2 or 3 episode I have realized that I have very mixed feelings about this season. Before I start I’d like to remind you that this is how I feel about this seasons. There may be things you you agree with, other’S you don’t. I’d like to hear about them, but please be polite - it’s just an opinion. Also: While many things might sound negative, I still took the time to think and write about them. That’ how invested I am in this show. I wouldn’t bother doing that for a show I don’t enjoy watching. The thing is: The more I like a character, the harder I judge how they are developed. No hard feelings.

First, I have to admit that I had very high expectations after 8.16. I did not particularly like season 8, not because Mike and Rachel left and not because of the introduction of Alex and Samantha (who I think were both very refreshing additions to the cast), but because I felt that Harvey and Donna in particular seemed to be stuck in some kind of limbo in regards to character development for the first 14 episodes. The Kessler romance that somewhat triggered the “Darvey” romance felt rushed in the end of season 8, even though I had wanted for this to happen for so long.

9.01 started so promising and I really enjoyed the introduction of Faye. I loved the fun moments with Louis being Louis, just the way they happened in the early seasons. All in all, Louis is the one character I am most pleased with in regards to character and storyline. Everything seems seamlessly consistent with him.

Harvey I also really can’t complain about. His character development has stretched over the entirety of nine seasons and it is natural that now things are slowly winding down.

The character development I am most unhappy about is Donna. It seems to me that all season her sole purpose was to serve Harvey coffee. There were some sweet moments with Louis and some confrontations with Faye and the other partners, but let’s face it: The only storyline that she really had next to being Harvey’s sidekick was her Dad and Faye being unhappy about her relationship with Harvey, which was one of the subplots of “Cairo”. It reminded me a little of the early seasons when Donna barely had any other purpose than being Harvey’s know-it-all secretary, but not in a good way. It felt like Alex, Katrina and even Esther had more significant plots this season, though they were similar in their length regarding screen time.

However this isn’t the first time I am unhappy with Donna’s character development. Despite Donna being my favorite Suits character -hands down-  I’m still super irked about her unrealistic leap from secretary to COO. As a woman in a business where most my co-workers are men I hate to see when TV gets women’s hopes up in how this could happen. To me, it feels like Donna slept her way to her position without actually sleeping with her boss. The circumstances are -in my eyes- the same, which is why I hate it. This isn’t gender equality, because no secretary, be it male or female does get promoted to COO without taking a few more steps in between. This only happens in fairytales.  Donna has no qualification to be COO at all and I would have felt much differently about the situation if the plot would have been Donna taking her seed money to go to business school. Or some twist in the story with Donna revealing her MBA certificate saying “Actually, those Pilates classes I allegedly take every Friday afternoon were college courses. Here’s my degree. Promote me.” And the worst of it all: Donna changed. The way she spoke to people changed, the way she dressed changed and in the end she was a Jessica/Donna hybrid I could hardy recognize as the quirky secretary she used to be. For me part of her charm was the amount of power she had by just “working from Harvey’s desk”. But I’m rambling- this ship sailed long ago.

Back to season 9. I had hope, now that she was in a relationship with Harvey, we would get a more domestic side of her, get a glimpse of her private life. What’s with that reveal of an older sister that was neither here or there or in any way relevant to the plot? I don’t know about you, but Donna always gave me this ‘only-child’ vibe. Which is probably why her sister was explained away as “much older”. However, why did they cast a woman who is only 11 years older than Sarah Rafferty as her mom? While I think season 9 Donna is probably several years younger than Sarah because the seasons only appear to be spanning around 6 months or so (considering how long Sheila was pregnant, the time it took Rachel to get her postgraduate degree and so on) and one could argue that Donna’s mom is therefore some years older than the actress who portrays her it would still be the case that Donna’s mom had her in her early twenties at the latest. When would she have had a much older sister? At 16? Unnecessary plot hole/irregularity. Kudos however for explaining away how Donna’s parents seemed to be married when Harvey let them stay at his condo once, then were seemingly separated during the “god-awful dinner party” (some people argue it must have been Donna’s “loser” boyfriend, but why would have Harvey been there in that case?). Clarification finally came: They were separated but got back together. Brownie points for plot consistency.

Some casual outfits made an appearance, which was an important first step, but they still felt a little forced. I mean, what’s the thing in American TV shows to have the woman wearing PJs with perfectly coiffed hair, fake lashes and full make-up? In the season 2 scenes where Harvey and Mike visited Donna after she was fired she was not only dressed casually, her face and hair were noticeably dressed down as well. I would have liked that a lot to make it more realistic. And the jammies disappeared after episode 1. There are several morning scenes with Harvey and Donna were both are already fully dressed for work (apart from Donna being barefoot at some times (jeez, if I wore those heels I’d be barefoot the second I’d enter the apartment). I think it made those scenes more sterile and less domestic despite the sweet dialogues. I think I would have liked it better, if there was a little more slouching, touching, maybe a TV running, or one of them sitting on the crumpled bed. Less superhero, more normal, that’s what I would have liked. And what’s with the no-touching anyways? I would have understood if it was only the office scenes, because I do believe neither of the character’s to be big on PDA, especially at work. But at home? Politely sitting next to each other, no leaning in, no touching, no hugging. Just talking. Like old times. I would have liked to see more of them being a couple. Sure, there were some pretty intense romantic scenes like in Mike’s apartment and with Lily and the painting, but the small moments that surrounded those big Darvey scenes were pretty underwhelming. Well, at least Harvey’s bathrobe made an appearance in 9.09 so there is still hopes for some normalcy in 9.10. It’s not an issue of screen time. Even as a Darvey shipper I was aware s9 would not turn into the “Darvey show”, it’s the content of some of the small scenes that disappointed me. Okay, no more Donna or Darvey bashing. Did I mention I’m actually a Darvey shipper?

One more thing: Why is everyone in this show dying of heart attacks. I understand why Lily had to die in terms of the storyline. But a heart attack? What are the odds of both slim and fit parents dying untimely of a heart attack? Could the writers not think of other sudden causes of deaths? She could have an aneurysm, get hit by a car, been diagnosed with a fatal cancer without Harvey knowing and so on and so on. Also: In the very same episode Sutter also died: Cause: Heart attack! If that’s where the writer’s creativity is heading it’s probably best we are nearing the end. If this unfortunate accumulation of heart attack was created on purpose, I do not get the reason why. 

Another hope I had for s9: A Jessica cameo. My hope was for a small storyline that would be addressed in both Pearson and Suits in order to gain more attraction for the new show. Plus I love Jessica. With so many loose ends to tie up in 9.10 I doubt there will be time for a proper Jessica Pearson appearance other than being a guest to Louis wedding, if she appears at all. Can we please talk about the wedding? Why does Louis get a baby AND a wedding in one season? He was engaged twice before. Even Mike and Rachel technically had two wedding scenes (one in s5 and one in 7). At least it looks like we still get a Darvey proposal. While I agree with Sarah Rafferty that a big white wedding shouldn’t be the conclusion of her character, I had –albeit a small- hope that there would be unconventional quick nuptials somewhere around episode 6 or 7 instead of that almost proposal. Taking Harvey’s character development into context I would find that Harvey creating a family on his own more important than a Darvey wedding. We already know those two are endgame. And while I think another pregnancy would be cheesy and far too rushed in this short span of episodes I still hold out a little hope that there will be a moment shared between Harvey and Donna that alludes to the idea that they’ll go into the baby-making business soon. Maybe when Sheila goes into labour? Not sure that will als still happen in 9.10.

In order not to have to finish this little article on a  negative note: There are things I really really liked. Samantha’s storylines, Mike’s cameo in 9.09 (though he was such a douche in 9.05), the phone calls with Lily, the mock trial and Sheila’s change of heart about her career. Been glad we did not spend more than one ep on the Katrina/Brian romance. Thank you.

[leoleofitz]

2019 in review

rules: answer the questions about 2019 and tag some people! tagged by: @ashergarcias and @quincywillows

top 5 films you watched in 2019:

Spiderman: Into the Spiderverse (2018)

Hustlers (2019)

Rocketman (2019)

Avengers: Endgame (2019)

Charlie Wilson’s War (2007)

top 5 tv shows in 2019:

Roswell New Mexico

Skam NL

The Society

Schitt’s Creek

@ambitionsource

top 10 songs of 2019:

“hurricane” by forever in your mind

"put a little love on me” by niall horan

“look what god gave her” by thomas rhett

“younger” by ruel

“cruel summer” by taylor swift

"youngblood” by 5 seconds of summer

“looking at me” by sabrina carpenter

"arms open” by the script

"me!” by taylor swift ft. brendan urie

"lover” by taylor swift

top 5 books you read in 2019:

a town like alice by nevil shute

shadow and bone by leigh bardugo

the goldfinch by donna tartt

all the lonely people by @quincywillows (i didn’t read many books but this fic is just as good)

dash and lily’s book of dares by david levithan & rachel cohen

5 good/positive things that happened to you in 2019:

finished my bachelor of arts degree and graduated

connected with some amazing people on here who I feel so lucky to call my friends

maybe decided what i want to do with my life?? getting closer to knowing at least

flatted with my best friend and actually became closer and it didn’t destroy our friendship at all which obviously I didn’t want but I was worried living together wouldn’t go well for us

started bullet journaling, which has been a super positive channel for me and a great creative outlet

yeah so... cheers to 2020 and idk who to tag, anyone can do it :)

[seriouscaseofimagination]

Late rant abt Titans s2

I can't stand Dawn. Bish, instead of sipping on "I told u so" juice every time Dick and Donna done fuck up, why don't you contribute to making the team better? I mean srsly! And your wig is still wack.

Then there's Dick who keeps saying he's done things he did not actually do and taking the blame for shit others were encouraging him to do (looking at u Donna). I know that Jericho kid didn't deserve to die but every single one of them approved the plan before it was put in motion (even if Dawn and Hank kinda wanted out after a while) meaning each and every one of them played a part in the kid's death. So don't come at Dick with that "u done fucked up" shit when he was the only one owning up to his actions.

And then, Donna. Mtfking Donna. Bish, why u leaving when you played just as big a part in this plan as the others did. Bish this whole thing started because u were an indecisive mess and u were in the wrong place atthe wrong time. If anything, the titans wouldn't have even met Deathstroke if it weren't for you. So why is Dick the only one apologising for something you more than any other OG titans wanted : revenge on Deathstroke? They should be blaming you too hoe.

Finally, I think the writers ended up in the same situation as the Twilight writers did. All the characters are just standing around watching the main cast (which strangely enough this season ended up being the OG titans, I'm mad about that too) deliver their lines. Gar got as much character development this season as Jasper Cullen did in his entire book and film series. Kory is on a side quest (bet u they aren't going to address it next season, if there even is a next season). Like, I'm not asking for an Avengers Endgame level of writing but still, have you forgotten that the main cast's the one that was introduced in the first season? (with the exception of Hawk and Dove, these two stall the plot so much, I feel like pieces of my soul are being ripped away every time they're on screen, it's excruciating.) What's the point of introducing new characters if you can barely fit enough screen time for the ones we are supposed to care about? Not only that but what was the point of this season's first episode? Rachel was the ugly duckling of the first season but you decided to make her the driving force behind the whole titans reunion so why does she have as much screen time as Gar does? She is what drove Dick to care for them as Bruce once did for him and she's supposedly like a little sister to him : that's a fantastic source of drama, character development and whtv else you need to make the story better. I know the actress isn't that good but paired with the dude who plays Dick, it would've worked just fine.

Rant over.

[ourmanifestoisfun]

4x16 episode thoughts

I have thoughts! And also possibly a rather unpopular opinion at the conclusion.

Rebecca...no creeping on Dr Akopian!

“I’m retired from stalking but you never lose the skills”

Loving “The Bachelor” shade and that Dr Akopian’s advice is just, no catfights

Also really amused by the “big chairs” thing because, well, yeah. Coffee shops be like that sometimes.

I will forever be confused about how much money Nathaniel is meant to have access to

Shirts stay on LOL - but Skylar is so ripped though! Maybe just the arms.

Mm yeah, taking one dollar off breakfast specials does tend to make people bonkers

Paula’s new job is actually, gasp, A JOB! Must be an adjustment from Whitefeather

Also her and Scott have a four times-a-week marital sex quota? DAMN they’ve come far.

While the gurlgroup’s opinions are definitely just meant to reflect the fandom rather than what they probably would think, I’m still amused

Paula is probably a good example of ‘even when you try to give it up, those damn OTP feels come back’. Also, I can buy that she would be suspicious of Nathaniel re: infidelity

Heather flipping from Team Greg to Team Nathaniel just amuses me. Then again, she did also date Greg. 

Calling him Armie Hammer hot definitely made me laugh though. And I really hope there is a video of Nathaniel singing Etta Mae’s Lament just floating around out there, because that would be great.

Greg being a different actor in a “moral, political sense”, hah, that’s good

And now they’ve actually kicked off a betting pool. Whoops!

WHIJO SONG AND HE’S KILLING IT

God love those outfits. Valencia’s especially, damn

Damn Father Brah, also “priest school” callback!

They finally got Donna Lynn tapdancing! And Valencia’s pirouettes!

...oh they called back to the Group Mind!

God that was some awesome choreography.

Okay, they are lampshading Greg being the underdog already.

That is quite a cut of the number of times that Paula has said she doesn’t like Greg...but on the flip side, she has described him as sexy multiple times as well.

I like that they are trying to make a point that Josh isn’t trying to live in the past with this date, because I could see that as an easy write-off, but the fact that this is the well he returns to is still a little concerning for me.

Oh, they did bang in summer camp! Well, did stuff. I’ve always gone back and forth on that point.

God I am a sucker for stars, that was lovely

Valencia I hope your finances are okay after all of this

Noted: Paula works at Eastbriar Law Group

“So you don’t disappoint your son again” GREG NO BAD you still have not improved on your words.

Also yeah, being in Paula’s good graces is probably still a good thing, but she’s still not Rebecca. Still, that was a lovely gesture, Gregory.

“I’ve been hoping that the San Andreas fault will open up and swallow Nathaniel” aldkfjskdfjdk this was cute

But this is so awkward, with Josh living at the house. I hope that whatever next week’s decision is, that he chooses to move out on his own.

Nathaniel’s date location is gorgeous. Isn’t that the spot where Rachel and her husband got married? I can totally see why.

That is very clever about listening to the concert, Nathaniel, though I do love that his date went a little bit wrong. Going with the flow is part of your new mantra, dude.

GOD THAT WAS CUTE

...Though the fact that the aerial shots came from a drone is prettyyy creepy. Y’all are being kind of scary here.

I do love that Darryl bet on Nathaniel. “Papa’s got a winner!”/“Mama’s got a winner!”

WEIRD AL OMG!

WHERE’S THE BATHROOM REPRISE OH MY GODDDDD

poor Weird Al balloon guy. Do not shit in his balloon.

Rebecca, stop stalking Dr Akopian!

The Love’s a Game reprise is very bittersweet, because it’s too true: everyone is going to be hurt in some way, whether she chooses one or none of them. And THAT’S why people hate love polygons!

The thought of Nathaniel betting on himself really amused me

I like how the theme of games keeps coming up - they are supposed to be fun, they are not supposed to matter, even if you lose you're meant to just shake it off and go back to your everyday life...but those things aren’t always true. They can matter and they can hurt. None of these guys are treating these dates like a game, even if they use the lingo and the people around them are placing their bets, because at the end of the day, they all care.

“Death by lightning bolt. It’s quick, it’s painless. I do like the guy, after all.” - idk I just found this line really, really funny.

I hope Valencia didn’t lose too much money, poor baby.

Greg and Rebecca’s end banter is really sweet.

So...this may be an unpopular and even wrong opinion, but I think that Greg’s date puts him even with the other guys, rather than necessarily ahead of them. Greg being able to tell Rebecca that she is the love of his life is absolutely character development: he’s come full circle from his fuck-up at Jayma’s wedding back in season 1: even back then, Rebecca didn’t need trappings of true romance (at least not by the end of the night) to stay with him, she just needed him to tell her how he felt about her. Given her mental health at that point, there is a very good question as to how long that would have been enough before she tripped back into obsession with Josh, but it would have meant something.

However, I think I will be very annoyed if it is played as the “truest” romance. Neither Josh nor Nathaniel said anything like that admission on their dates because it isn’t something they are afraid of because they have already told Rebecca that they love her - Nathaniel by his own admission has done this several times. Instead, their dates highlighted the qualities about them where they have fun with Rebecca. And it isn’t that Rebecca doesn’t enjoy the dates - it’s the ticking clock at the end that is freaking her out, because love is not a game.

That doesn’t mean that there isn’t the set up for it: they have paralleled Josh and Nathaniel a lot this season in regards to Rebecca, which does make Greg the odd one out and they would be able to have him be the endgame with that justification that he’s different...but given that and the way this episode is structured, as well as the consistent lampshading of Greg as the underdog, that really feels like the straightforward solution and this show...doesn’t do that.

And look at the wording of how the guys tell Rebecca that they care:

Josh: “It’s always felt like someone is writing a story about us” Nathaniel: “I think we’re meant to be together.” Greg: “You know you’re the love of my life, right?”

All of these lines, even Greg’s, with his lowkey, domestic date, are about the incredible narrative importance of Rebecca in their lives, in the past, present, and future. For Josh, it’s how she’s kept returning to his life. For Nathaniel, she made him imagine a new life going forward. For Greg, it’s how just being with her has such an effect on him. And, frankly, those sentiments aren’t exclusive to each guy - you can apply each one to all of them. But that’s also why I felt the dates turned out more even keeled, despite the structure. And at this point, I really doubt they’ll try to pull the ‘oh it isn’t genuine love’ for any of them.

In addition, People have been making the point for some time that having her pick one of the guys might end up feeling weird, because it would turn the show into the “Rebecca & _____” story, instead of it being Rebecca’s story. The most likely scenario to me is still that Rebecca ends up alone/possibly with Jason, while the other guys are shown to have moved on with their lives. Everyone who has followed this blog will know that I very much have my bias, and I always will. This episode did not change that one whit. But beyond that, given the spoilers for next week, I think everyone will get a little fanservice with their favored guys, but that ultimately, she will not be choosing any of them. But I think they will all be happy, and that means a lot.

I love this show, guys, and I’m going to miss it.

[atmilliways]

You like AUs, right? Mash up Metalocalypse and That 70s Show, go! Mash up Metalocalypse and Friends, go! Mash up Metalocalypse and Frasier, go!

Oh jeebus, why?

… But yeah you’re right I do.

That Dethklok’s Show

You know what makes me mad is that I want to say Nathan and Charles are Eric and Donna, but Seth is unarguably Lori and that messes everything up.

Okay so Pickles = Eric, Seth = Lori, Calvert = Red but with hair, and Molly = Kitty except Seth is her favorite child too.

Skwisgaar = Kelso because he’s tall, pretty, and horny. Also, in this AU, he is drowning in brothers because Servetta can’t keep it in her panties.

Toki = Fez because he’s foreign, happy most of the time, sings and dances for the simple joy of it, and his room is decked out with toys and fun stuff.

Murderface = Hyde because of the righteous fa-RO baby, and also because he DOESN’T HAVE ANY PARENTS. He moves in with Pickles’ family and lives in the basement. (Pickles was hoping this would give Molly and Calvert another Target to rag on and give him a break. It didn’t work.)

Unlike Hyde, Murderface is not cool and doesn’t get any eventual Hyde/Jackie storyline. Instead, his relationship history goes more like Fez’s. Without the weird forced Fez/Jackie stuff at the end of the series, which really went downhill has soon as Donna dyed her hair blonde.

Charles = Buddy, the random rich kid who is canonically gay, only he’s a regular part of the group instead of a one-episode throwaway character.

I’m cool with Pickles/Charles, and that fits with Buddy coming on to Eric in the show. But I would eventually break them up and put Charles with…

Nathan = no one on the show, but he’s got a lot of Hyde’s qualities in terms of stoic, bad boy vibes. However, like Kelso, he is an Adorable Dumb (see “that’s doable” hat).

Rebecca Nightrod = Jackie, but she’s not a necessarily a regular character. Murderface fawns/lusts over her like Fez, even though she’s a bitch. Nathan hates her, even though he does date her briefly in a relationship that she holds onto tenaciously until, in an act of desperation that absolutely horrifies Pickles, he cheats on her with Seth.

Abigail = Donna, because she’s smart and has good hair. (Zero bleach kits in sight.)

Rockso = Bob, because he’s a cue ball on top and makes liberal use of crazy wigs. Bargain Rockso’s is that store that’s always open on holidays — just in case you’re driving home Christmas night, realize you forgot to get a gift, and rush in to buy a fridge to solve the gift problem and/or some cocaine to forget there was ever a problem in the first place.

Magnus = Leo. He gives Murderface a job at his hilariously unprofitable Photo Hut business, declines to sell his real cool car to Skwisgaar on principal, and generally supplies the gang with all their weed and assorted drugs.

Dory McLean = Midge. She’s young, dumb, has big boobs, and Abigail is exasperated as hell that she doesn’t understand feminism in the slightest.

Knubbler = Mitch, the weird kid who hangs around and is sometimes kinda entertaining but keeps hitting on Abigail, which annoys her. However, he’s also stupid and accidentally self-sabotages (see setting his sleeve on fire while trying to flirt), so she doesn’t really waste energy on slapping him back down.

Pickles “burning down the shed” = Eric telling Red “I do it too” when Hyde gets busted for possession. Either way Abigail (Donna) is standing in the background going, “For the love of god, DON’T.”

Trindle = Cousin Penny, only instead of prankish Pickles (Eric) she targets Nathan, who during her last visit when they were much younger helped Pickles trap her in a revolving door. Abigail is completely secure in her looks compared to Trindle and actually talks Rebecca out of a potentially disastrous sunlamp tan.

Nathan and Abigail go out for like, a second, while Nathan and Charles are I one of their off-again fazes.

Endgame parings are Nathan/Charles, Abigail/Rebecca, and Skwisgaar/Toki.

B.A.N.D.M.A.T.E.S

Nathan = Ross. Can you picture Nathan doing the *long sigh, ex wife is a lesbian blues* “Hi” thing? Because I can.

Abigail = Carol. They got together but it just didn’t work out in the long run. 

Rebecca Nightrod = Susan. Tbh, I think the reason she keeps popping up is because of how @little-murmaider portrayed her in Stay Alive. She and Nathan get along like a house on fire, in that it’s a disaster and Abigail keeps having to turn the hose on them to stop the bickering.

Toki = Monica, although his chef skills are mostly confined to providing fruit and burning plastic. He’s still got the overshadowed younger sibling thing going on though.

Molly = Judy Geller. Dotes on Nathan.

Oscar = Jack Geller. Is amiably odd.

Charles = Rachel. Except not as ditzy. But he does break an engagement off at the altar and moves in with Toki, an old acquaintance he hasn’t seen since high school and one of the few people he, ah, did not invite to the wedding. For the record, he was hoping that wouldn’t come up.

Skwisgaar = Joey. Except when they all go to London, Toki (Monica) does hook up with him, gradually teaches him how to relationship, and eventually they get married.

Murderface = Chandler. He hates his data processing job and keeps threatening to leave it to work on his side project, Planet Piss, but never actually does because the money is really good. When he goes back to the pet store to return the baby chick Skwisgaar impulse bought, he instead adopts an ugly-ass duck that no one wants because it’s original owners thought it was just an ugly duckling that would grow up into a swan. He feels that he can empathize with it, and names it Dick van Duck.

Knubbler = Dick van Duck. Listens patiently to all of Murderface’s Planet Piss ideas.

Pickles = Phoebe. He doesn’t even know who his dad is, and is proud that he doesn’t. (I’m not going to lie, Phoebe’s family situation definitely fits more with Murderface, but Phoebe’s dating track record is too good.) Remember the one where Pickles broke up with someone he’d just moved in with because the person shot a bottle of liquor?

Seth = Ursula. 100% Ursula. Seth is a “career driven” waiter and also a part time porn star on the side, using Pickles’ name.

Fraiser 

I don’t watch this one as much, so this one won’t be as detailed probably.

Skwisgaar = Frasier. Idk, because he goes on dates with a different woman at least every episode. Also, he’s a jackass, but good at what he does and there are some redeeming glimmers of not being a complete asshole that make his presence worthwhile.

Nathan = Niles. Minus most of the neuroses. Instead of successful musicians, he and Skwisgaar are both successful psychiatrists, although Skwisgaar usually gets the bulk of the public’s, ahem, attention.

Daphne = Charles. He’s oblivious to Nathan’s crush on him for ages, but when he realizes it’s there and thinks about how sweet Nathan’s always been to him, he falls hard.

Rebecca Nightrod = Maris. She and Nathan have a rocky marriage, and eventually a rockier divorce in which she accuses Nathan of being emotionally unfaithful because of Charles.

Abigail = The brilliant divorce lawyer that handles Nathan’s case, and briefly dates Charles. They seem like such a good fit on paper that they’re actually engaged for a bit, but they break it off amiably right before getting to the altar, and Nathan and Charles ride off into the sunset in an RV with “road warrior” vanity plates.

Toki = Roz. (I know, technically Roz’s promiscuousness would be more Skwisgaar, but Skwisgaar’s superiority complex fits better with Frasier.) Although competent and successful in his own right, he is not the on air talent. Unlike in Frasier, when Toki and Skwisgaar sleep together they actually become a couple instead of backing off and remaining good friends.

Rockso = That garbage man that Roz was head over heals with for a while… Rodger?He belongs in a garbage can. Anyway, after breaking up with Toki over the latter’s inability to get over his massive cocaine use, Toki goes to Skwisgaar for comfort, which leads to drinking which leads to sex. Toki flees the next morning and flies to Norway for the annual family reunion, only he hadn’t told anyone he’s broken up with Rockso. Skwisgaar, desperate to Talk Things Out and hopefully even Do That Again, follows and (cringingly, but of his own volition) answers to/pretends to be Rockso to help Toki save face in front of his critical family.

Murderface = Bulldog. He and Toki briefly have a thing, and he’s actually kind of sweet when you get right down to it, but things don’t work out. Masturbation photos are involved — don’t ask. Also, at one point Skwisgaar accidentally repeats a rumor that Murderface is going to get fired where Murderface can hear it, so

Murderface goes and yells at the station manager (then Knubbler) and quits. Then he’s unemployed for a while, and scrapes by delivering pizzas. I forget how that situation resolved itself in the show but it does.

Knubbler = Kenny the station manager. Weak willed. Weak chinned. Ineffectual. Good track record in his career, but mostly he’s just there.

Abigail = That domineering and extremely competent lady station manager that’s there for a while… Kate? Has a cat. But she does NOT get it on with Skwisgaar (Frasier) on his desk and accidentally bump the On Air button partway through. She has a very strict policy of not getting involved with anyone she works with, although naturally everyone tries.

That’s all I got.

Magnus = Martin. Because he’s a cranky old man. He and Nathan don’t get along and he resents having to live with Skwisgaar, but they all gamely trade barbed insults and leave it at that. Magnus is a retired cop who still works on old cold cases as a hobby, having vowed revenge on uncaptured murderers everywhere. He and Charles (Daphne) get along pretty well, and there is no stabbing of any kind.

Metal Masked Assassin = Cam Winston. At one point he blocks Skwisgaar and Toki in Skwisgaar’s SUV into a parking space with his own SUV, and only relents and backs out when Charles comes and calmly threatens him, because “that’s my bread and butter you’re blocking in.”

There, are you happy now?? I spent a ridiculous amount of time on this, asdf;lkj lol.

[theonethatwatchesalotofshows]

I wonder why isn't That 70s Show finale hated on the same level as HIMYM finale. When fans complain about the show they usually say things like: "The last season kinda sucked. But the ending though!" Like why? Why do people like this ending? The ending sucked just as much as the rest of the final season. I mean, yeah it was really nostalgic, Kelso and Eric returned, no Randy or Samantha but still. It didn't change the fact that Jackie and Hyde weren't endgame nor were Kelso and Brooke. I get it that most fans just prefer Eric and Donna to all other ships but they didn't get the best ending either.

I mean think about it. This was a ship built on years of friendship and mutual trust. They were there from the pilot and they were super cute. The friends turned lovers kinda ship. In those first 3 seasons they were definitely the ultimate otp of That 70s Show. The writing got kinda sloppy when they got back together in season 5 but they still had some cute moments until season 8 when Eric broke up with her over a letter?!!! How are we supposed to believe that Eric would do something like that to her???!! No, he definitely wouldn't, the in character Donna and Eric would've made it work. The only actual reason why they had to break them up in the dumbest way possible is just so that they can create some stupid drama over Donna dating a guy 99,9% of the fandom hates. Eric comes home an episode after they break up and they get back together after a two minute conversation about nothing?!!! Like wtf??!!! We were clearly Ross&Racheled with these two!!! This was a couple that could do much better than this!!!! They had so much potential!!! Like they could've been already married if the writers didn't create the ooc drama at the end of season 6. Or engaged at least!!! But no what do we get instead?! The same thing we got in the pilot. Donna and Eric kissing in the driveway.

Just compare the two gifs?! Literally NOTHING except of Donna's haircolor changed!!! Their relationship hasn't progressed during these 8 seasons at all!! It doesn't even make sense why they should be together at all! Like why should we root for them?! Because they have history?! They tried over and over and failed to make it work each time?! So why do fans still like this ending?! Why do fans like these two people who never seemed to make it work on a long run randomly rushed together like this?

Maybe because they just like that Eric's back, Kelso's back, Randy's gone and Eric and Donna are back together again. Maybe they just like the familiarity of it. But if you really think about it this is not a happy ending for anyone. At all.

[mycasandstarrs]

SPN 1x16: “Shadow”

John finally faces the bros.

I’m almost tempted to watch this in Spanish...but for the sake of continuity, I’ll watch it in English.

Seems like Meredith is being haunted.

Now would be the time to haul ass to home.

WHY DO YOU HAVE SO MANY KEYS.

She looks completely calm, like what just happened didn’t just happen.

RIP Meredith.

Posing as employees of the alarm company

Mentions of Sam's theater experience. As a former theater kid, I’m happy Sam was one too.

“Well no offense, but your alarm’s about as useful as boobs on a man.” LMAO

This landlord (landlady?) is a one hit wonder imo.

Dean, focus.

Meredith’s heart was missing. Sounds like a werewolf, but Sam confirms that the lunar cycle is off.

HOW did Dean even notice the pattern??? That’s incredible.

Now he’s flirting with the bartender. Dean must’ve flirted so many answers out of so many women.

Ben Swardstrom, the first victim before Meredith. They had similar deaths but nothing in common.

Sam finds Meg. What a happy coincidence...

“What are the odds we’d run into each other?” 

Sam gets busted for talking shit about Dean. 

Dean handles that well. Certainly better than I would have.

“If it were me, I’d kill him.” OH I BET.

I usually praise Dean for having great instincts, and now it’s Sam’s turn to receive my praise. 

Dean, you're such a little shit.

MOTE: Daeva.

“Bite me.”

“No, bite her.”

lmao, I love Dean.

LMAO, poor Sam.

Sam is really going to climb all the way up??? I’ll be damned.

How can Sam even hang on for that long??? And Meg surely knew he was there the whole time??

Meg's controlling the daeva.

“So Sammy’s got a thing for the bad girl.” Wait until you meet Ruby.

Both victims were from Lawrence, Kansas.

“So you think Meg’s tied up with the demon?” She actually is, but they won’t know it yet.

Dean calls John.

You two are liars, you’re both nervous.

“What if this whole thing were over tonight?” nooo

That is a huge conversation the brothers just had and it’s one that I think carries just as much importance right now, after S13 going into S14 and nearing the end of the series, than it did back then

Dean was always aware that there’d be bigger and badder monsters waiting after this one big demon, and he was already prepping himself to face those. He didn’t seem to mind that but-

Dean does not want to be alone. He wants Sam by his side, he wants to be with family. Here it means Sam and John (now that list is significantly longer, but I won’t get into that).

Sam’s brand of gentle but firm tough love comes back again. He tells Dean that while they are family and he’d do anything for him, things can’t go back to how they used to be before...whatever that necessarily means. Because I imagine things before weren’t all peachy but for Dean, having a dysfunctional family that fought often was better than no family at all.

“I’m not gonna live this life forever. Dean, when this is all over, you’re gonna have to let me go my own way.” Words that could easily be said by current Sam. IF anything, I believe more than ever that Sam’s endgame is to step away from hunting, or at least be part time hunter like Alex or Jody or Donna. The Bobby role, as some put it.

Overall, this is just a sad conversation to watch, the only thing that alleviates the pain is that I think the brothers are in a better position to let go of each other, because Dean now has someone who would willingly stick by him (CAS) and Sam could “retire” in peace knowing that things will be ok and that they’ll always have each other.

Was there really no stairs the brothers could have taken???

“Guys, hiding’s a little bit childish, don’t you think?”

“Sam, I have to say, this puts a real crimp in our relationship.” 

Originally, it took Rachel Miner’s Meg for me to like the character, but OG Meg has my love for her right now.

This is a trap for John.

“Go to hell.”

“Baby, I’m already there.”

Damn, I gotta start saying that.

“Get a room you two.” Dean to Meg and Sam as Meg hits on him. Surely Sam has thought the same about Dean and Cas.

Goddamn it Dean.

Nice headbutt! 

Sam knocks over the altar

And they’ve just unintentionally killed the real Meg Masters.

“Next time you wanna get laid, find a girl that’s not buckets of crazy.”

IT’S JOHN.

“Hey boys.”

Oh just hug each other, come on.

Dean, don’t apologize, you didn’t know.

Sam asks to help John. John refuses.

“You don’t have to worry about us.”

:”Yes I do. I’m your father.”

HUG ALREADY PLEASE.

Aww, there we go.

Dean’s just so happy to see them getting along. This must’ve been a fantastic moment for him.

SHIT.

A flash bang. Good thinking Sam.

“Dad you can’t come with us.”

NOOOOOOOO

Goddamnit, I’m getting upset.

“He’s stronger without us around.”

Sam refuses to let go. I just want to cry about this, goddamnit.

UGH THE SACRIFICES THEY HAVE TO MAKE.

“Be careful, boys.” Bye John, we’ll see you later.

OOOHHHHH.