#we’re on season 5 now and yesterday before we started the episode he was like

[thegnat]

i decided to show my bf the first five seasons of supernatural and i did not expect him to become THIS invested in destiel holy shit

[nikimisery]

Season 1 Episode 5 - Bloody Mary

                “Sam, wake up.” Dean called out from the front seat. I had been reading the new book Dean had ‘not’ gotten me, Dark Lover by J.R. Ward, when he started showing signs of a nightmare. Sitting up, he looked around the car, confused.

             “I take it I was having a nightmare?” He asked.

             “Yeah, another one.”

             “Hey, at least I got some sleep.” Sam replied. Reaching up, I popped him in the back of the head with my book.

             “Doesn’t count.” I told him.

             “You know, sooner or later, we’re gonna have to talk about this.” Dean spoke up, but Sam ignored him.

             “Are we here?”

             “Yup. Welcome to Toledo, Ohio.”

             “So what do you think really happened to this guy?” He asked, picking up the newspaper Dean had circled the Shoemaker obituary in yesterday.

             “That’s what we’re gonna find out.” Dean replied before getting out of the car and opening my door for me. We made our way into the hospital, following the signs for the morgue.

             “I hate hospitals.” I spoke up. “It smells funny in here.”

             “Hey.” A rather bored looking morgue technician spoke up when we reached the desk.

             “Hey.” Dean answered him.

             “Can I help you?”

             “Yeah. We’re the, uh… med students.”

             “Sorry?”

             “Oh, Doctor – “ Dean paused, looking over at the nameplate for the doctor before continuing, “-Figlavitch didn’t tell you? We talked to him on the phone. He, uh, we’re from Ohio State. He’s supposed to show us the Shoemaker corpse. It’s for our paper.”

             “Well, I’m sorry, he’s at lunch.”

             “Oh well he said, uh, oh, well, you know, it doesn’t matter.” Dean said, fumbling with his words. “You don’t mind just showing us the body, do you?”

             “Sorry, I can’t.” He said, not even looking up from his book. “Doc will be back in an hour. You can wait for him if you want.”

             “An hour? Ooh. We gotta be heading back to Columbus by then.” Dean said, looking over to Sam for a little help.

             “Yeah.” Sam said.

             “Uh, look, man, this paper’s like half our grade, so if you don’t mind helping us out – “ Dean began, but the tech cut him off.

             “Uh, look, man… no.” Dean just laughs before turning back to us.

             “I’m gonna hit him in his face, I swear.” Before he could turn back to the tech, I smacked him in the arm, getting his attention.

             “Let me try.” I told him with a wink, walking past him to the tech’s desk. I had decided to wear a lowcut tank top with one of Dean’s flannels so maybe I could work this to my advantage. I stepped up to the desk, leaning down on my elbows in front of the guy, pushing my arms together to get his attention. “I’m sorry about my friend over there, he can get a little cranky sometimes.” I said, pushing out my bottom lip into a bit of a pout. His eyes followed my bottom lip before falling down to my shirt. He swallowed before looking back up at me.

             “It’s, um… it’s okay.” He stuttered out.

             “Do you think you could show me the body?” I asked him, running my finger along the back of his hand. “I cannot even begin to tell you how much it would help me.”

             “Uh, yeah, I guess it wouldn’t hurt anything.” He said, standing up so fast he almost knocked his chair over. “Yeah, uh, follow me.” I turned back to see Sam laughing, trying to cover his face and Dean glaring at the tech. Winking at them, I turned to follow him into the morgue.

             “Now the newspaper said his daughter found him. She said his eyes were bleeding.” Sam stated as the morgue tech pulled back the sheet that was covering the body.

             “More than that. They practically liquefied.” The morgue tech said, almost sounding excited.

             “Any sign of a struggle? Maybe somebody did it to him?” Dean asked.

             “Nope. Besides the daughter, he was all alone.”

             “What was the official cause of death?” Sam asked.

             “Ah, Doc’s not sure. He’s thinking massive stroke, maybe an aneurysm? Something burst up in there, that’s for sure.”

             “What do you mean?”

             “Intense cerebral bleeding.” I answered Sam.

             “Correct.” The tech said, eyeing me. “This guy had more blood in his skull than anyone I’ve ever seen.”

             “What would cause something like that?” Came Sam again.     

             “Capillaries can burst. See a lot of bloodshot eyes with stroke victims.” I replied, causing all three guys to turn to look at me. “What, I read.”

             “Yeah? You ever see exploding eyeballs?” Dean snarked at me.

             “That’s a first for me, but hey, I’m not the doctor.” Said the tech.

             “Hey, think we could take a look at that police report? You know for, uh… our paper?” Dean asked him.

             “I’m not really supposed to show you that.” Rolling my eyes, I turned to the tech and walked up to him.

             “But you can, right? Daddy said I need to get a good grade on this paper.” I asked sweetly.

             “Yeah…. Yeah, I can do that.” He said, turning around to grab the report. As soon as he handed it to me, I leaned up and kissed his cheek.

             “Thank you!” 

“You think that was cute?” His voice hit me as soon as we were out the door. 

“What are you talking about?” I asked him.

“Flirting with that guy? Kissing him? Did you enjoy yourself?” His voice was low, dangerous.

“Did you enjoy it, Sugar?” I asked with a smirk. 

“Careful.” 

“You keep saying that, but here we are…” I said, walking out the door, following Sam. 

                “Might not be one of ours.” Sam said when we caught up with him. “Might just be a freak medical thing.”

             “How many times in Dad’s long and varied career has it actually been a freak medical thing and not some sign of an awful supernatural death?” Dean asked him.

             “Uh, almost never.” Sam replied, almost sheepishly.

             “Exactly.”

             “All right, let’s go talk to the daughter.”

             ‘Someone’s cranky.’ She spoke.

             ‘He seemed pretty mad at our way of getting information.’

             ‘He could have always done something about it, but he didn’t. He’ll get over it.’

               When we reached the Shoemaker residence, the funeral was in full effect. We were surrounded by men and women wearing all black suits and dresses, making us stick out, severely.

             “Feel like we’re underdressed.” Dean pipped up as we walked through the house. I wasn’t sure what the daughter looked like, so I paused at the person closest to me.

             “Excuse me,” I began, speaking quietly so I didn’t disturb anyone. “Can you point me in the direction of Miss Shoemaker?”

             “Oh, yes.” The elderly woman said. “She’s just outside, sitting with her friends. Such a shame this happened to them…” She trailed off sadly.

             “Thank you so much.” I replied, pulling the boys with me towards the backyard. We found them exactly where the little lady said they would be.

             “You must be Donna, right?” Dean said as we all walked up to the little group.

             ‘Blondie better keep her eyes to herself.’ Val whispered in my head as she caught sight of one of the girls in the group eyeing Dean. ‘I’d be happy to cut them out for her.’ She snarled. I had to bite my lip to stop the grin that was trying to take over my face.

             ‘Stop it. Not the time.’

             “Yeah.” Donna replied to Dean.

             “Hi, uh – we’re really sorry.” Sam said.

             “Thank you.”

             “I’m Sam, this is Dean and this is Freya. We worked with your dad.”

             “You did?” She asked.

             “I don’t think she really wants to talk about this right now.” Cut in one of Donna’s friends.

             “It’s okay.” Donna cut her off. “I’m okay.”

             “Were there any symptoms?” Dean asked her. “Dizziness? Migraines?”

             “No.”

             “That’s because it wasn’t a stroke.” A little girl says, speaking up from beside Donna.

             “Lily, don’t say that.” Donna said gently. Lily. She must be the youngest daughter.

             “What?” Sam asked.

             “I’m sorry, she’s just upset.” Donna began.

             “No, it happened because of me.” Lily was all but crying at this point. I couldn’t help but feel sorry for the little one.

             “Lily,” I began, kneeling down so I could look her in the eye. “Why would you say that?” I asked her, as gently as I could.

             “Right before he died, I said it.”

             “You said what?” Sam prodded.

             “Bloody Mary, three times, in the bathroom mirror.” Lily began, raising her head up to meet my gaze. “She took his eyes, that’s what she does.”

             “That’s not why Dad died. This isn’t your fault.” Donna told her. I reached out for her, holding her hand in mine as Dean spoke up.

             “I think your sister’s right, Lily. There’s no way it could have been Bloody Mary.” He said. “Your dad didn’t say it, did he?”

             “No, I don’t think so.”

             “See?” I told her, squeezing her hand. “Not your fault.” I smiled at her as I stood, following the boys back into the house. We knew from the police report that he died in the upstairs bathroom, so that’s where we went, Sam pushing the door open.

             “The Bloody Mary legend… Dad ever find any evidence that it was a real thing?”

             “Not that I know of.” Dean answered him. “Princess, your mom got anything on this?”

             “No. But there are so many different Bloody Mary legends.” I began. “Like, so many. One says that Mary was a young girl that lived in the 1800s who was buried alive. One says Bloody Mary was a witch who lived in the woods, kidnapping young girls. There are a lot, but I’ve never read about one where the eyes liquify…”

             “I mean, everywhere else all over the country, kids will play Blood Mary, and as far as we know, nobody dies from it.” Sam said.

             “Yeah, well, maybe everywhere it’s just a story, but here it’s actually happening.” Dean suggested.

             “The place where the legend began?” Sam asked.

             “Or maybe just this legend?” I added. Dean just shrugged as he opened the cabinet, looking around for any type of clue.

             “But according to the legend, the person who says B-“ Sam began before he noticed that the cabinet Dean had opened made the mirror point directly at his face. Closing it, he continued. “The person who says you know what gets it. But here –“

             “Shoemaker gets it instead, yeah.” Dean finished for him.

             “Right.”

             “Never heard of anything like that before. Still, the guy did die right in front of a mirror, and the daughter’s right. The way the legend goes, you know who scratches your eyes out.”

             “It’s worth checking in to.” Sam replied, ushering us out of the bathroom.

             “I feel like I’m in a bad Harry Potter book…” I began.

             “Don’t even start, princess. You and Sasquatch, here, can talk nerd when we get out of here.” Dean cut me off. I just rolled my eyes at him, admittingly making sure he saw me, before following after Sam. I smirked to myself as I heard the low growl coming from Dean behind me, but before I could comment on it, we were interrupted by one of Donna’s friends from downstairs.

             “What are you doing up here?” She asked us.

             “We – we, had to go to the bathroom.” Dean said. That was possibly the worst explanation he could have tried to give…

             “Who are you?” She asked.

             “Like we said downstairs, we worked with Donna’s dad.”

             “He was a day trader or something. He worked by himself.”

             “No, I know, I meant –“

             “And all those weird questions downstairs, what was that? So you tell me what’s going on, or I start screaming.” She cut Dean off.

             “That’s enough out of you.” I spoke up, pointing to Dean, sticking my tongue out at him behind Sam’s back.

             “All right, all right. We think something happened to Donna’s dad.” Sam said.

             “Yeah, a stroke.” She responded. I just rolled my eyes at her before I spoke up.

             “That’s not a sign of a typical stroke.”

             “We think it might be something else.” Sam finished for me.

             “Like what?” She asked.

             “Honestly? We don’t know yet. But we don’t want it to happen to anyone else. That’s the truth.” Sam told her. Well, most of it anyways.

             “So, if you’re gonna scream, go right ahead.” Dean told her. “She might not be very happy if you do, though.” He finished up, pointing at me.

             “Who are you, cops?” Sam looked over his shoulder at Dean and I with a look that screamed ‘help me’.

             “Something like that.” I answered for him.

             “I’ll tell you what.” Sam started, reaching into his jacket pocket, pulling out a pen and a piece of paper. “Here.” He wrote down his cell number before handing it to her. “If you think of anything, you or your friends notice anything strange, out of the ordinary… just give us a call.” Dean and I were already almost halfway down the hallway towards the stairs when I turned around to speak up.

             “Literally anything, even if it’s small, even if you think it doesn’t matter.” She nodded at me as we headed back down the stairs and out of view. 

                We had left the Shoemaker’s house, deciding to head to the library, seeing if maybe we could find some information on our Bloody Mary.

             “Hey, Dean?” I popped my head up between the boys.

             “What’s up, princess?” He asked, never taking his eyes off the road.

             “Do you think sloths get angry?” I asked him. “I mean, they are like, so slow, and so chill…” I trailed off. I could hear Sam snickering to my right as I looked at Dean.

             “I don’t fuckin know. Do I look like National Geographic to you?” He snarked at me.

             “Could have just said no…” I mumbled out at him. Sam was full on laughing at us now.

             “Look it up when we get to the library.” He told me.

             “Fine.”

             “Fine.”

             “You’re mean.” I said, sticking my tongue out at him again.      

             “You know, that’s the second time in the past hour you’ve stuck that tongue out at me.”

             “And I’m going to keep doing it every time you deserve it.”

             “Open that mouth up again, baby girl, and I’m going to give you something to put in it.” He told me, lowering his voice again. My jaw dropped at that one, I swear I probably looked like a fish out of water. My face turned bright red and I sat back in my seat as quickly as I could.

             “You two disgust me.” Sam began, “But your face!” He laughed, pointing at me. It even made Dean chuckle a little.

             “I hate you both.”

             “Keep telling yourself that.” Sam said, as we pulled up to the library. Dean got out and opened my door for me, pulling me out and up against him.

             “You turn such pretty colors.” He said, running his finger down my cheek. “Makes me wonder where else I could make you blush.”

             “Are you two coming?” Sam called out to us from the library steps. “We got a job to do.” With Dean being distracted, I took the opportunity and snuck around him, all but running to Sam. This flirting is going to give me a heart attack. I know for a fact that I’m not his type, so why does he keep doing it? Why do I like it so much? Why do I never want him to stop? And why, for the love of whatever god is listening to me, do I want it all for myself? FUCK. Get it together.

             “All right, say Bloody Mary really is haunting this town.” Dean began, leading us into the building. “There’s gonna be some sort of proof – like a local woman who died nasty.”

             “Yeah, but a legend this widespread it’s hard. I mean, there’s like 50 versions of who she actually is. Like Freya said earlier, one story says she’s a witch, another says she’s a mutilated bride, there’s a lot more.”

             “All right so what are we supposed to be looking for?”   

             “Every version’s got a few things in common.” I began.

             “It’s always a woman named Mary, and she always dies right in front of a mirror.” Sam continued.

             “So we’ve gotta search local newspapers – public records as far back as they go. See if we can find a Mary who fits the bill.” I finished.

             “Well that sounds annoying.” Dean piped up.

             “No it won’t be so bad, as long as we…” Sam trailed off as we entered into the main part of the library, looking around. Every single one of the computers had a sign on them that said ‘Out of Order’. “I take it back,” He continued with a small laugh. “This will be very annoying.”

             “Freya…” Dean started. “I will literally do anything you ask of me, if you let me out of this room, right now.”

             “Will you let me drive baby?”

             “Sam, where do we start?”

             “Ay, fuck you, Winchester.” I said as Sam laughed at us, ushering us over to a table then leaving to get someone to help us find what we needed. We stayed there for a little bit, reading over everything that we could find before I noticed the fatigue trying to pull Sam under. I nudged Dean under the table, nodding my head towards his brother.

             “Let’s take this back to the motel.” He said, standing up and gathering up what he could hold with me and Sam following right behind him.

             “Yeah, okay.” Sam answered.

             “Ohhhhh can we get food??” I asked, giving Dean what I hoped would be a similar rendition of Sam’s successful puppy dog eyes.

             “Yeah, I guess I could eat.” He answered.  

                                “Why’d you let me fall asleep?” Sam asked us from where he was laid out on one of the beds. Dean and I were sitting at the small table, my legs propped up on his lap, looking through the articles and books spread out on the table. Dean had one of his hands resting on my shin, tracing patterns into the bone while he was looking through Sam’s laptop.

             “Cause I’m an awesome brother.” He answered him. “So what did you dream about?”

             “Lollipops and candy canes.” Sam responded. I snorted at his answer. I didn’t have to have super sensitive hearing to know he was lying.

             “Yeah, sure.” Dean quipped at him.

             “Did you find anything?” Sam asked, sitting up.

             “Oh besides a whole new level of frustration?” Dean answered sarcastically.

             “No, we’ve looked at everything. A few local women, a Laura and a Catherine committed suicide in front of a mirror.” I added in.

             “And a giant mirror fell on a guy named Dave, but uh, no Mary.” Dean finished for me.

             “Maybe we just haven’t found it yet.” Sam said with a sigh, falling back onto the bed again.

             “I’ve also been searching for strange deaths in the area, you know… eyeball bleeding, that sort of thing. There’s nothing. Whatever’s happening here, maybe it just ain’t Mary.”

             “I have a theory, but I want to make sure I’m right first.” I began. Dean opened his mouth to say something, but the ringing of Sam’s phone cut him off.      

             “Hello?” 

             We had rushed out to the car to meet Charlie as soon as Sam was off the phone and had relayed to Dean what happened. As we were driving down the road, Dean decided to pick up our earlier conversation.

             “Hey, princess. You said you had a theory?”

             “Yeah, but I wanted to make sure I was right first.”

             “Go ahead and lay it on us. The worst that could happen is your wrong.” He said. Normally, I wouldn’t want to tell them until I knew for sure what I was dealing with, but the more time I spent with them, the more comfortable I felt with them. I didn’t feel the need to hide away and not make any noise. I felt seen with them. They always listened to what I had to say and would either agree or disagree, but never once did they make me feel stupid for asking a question, or stating my opinion. It made me feel more at home than I had since my parents had died. It honestly scared the fuck out of me, but I had decided a while ago that I was going to embrace it for as long as they would have me.

             “So, a long time ago, when someone died in a house, the family would cover the mirrors with sheets and blankets, anything they could, so that the soul wouldn’t get trapped in it.” I began. “What if we are dealing with the same concept? It might not be where the legend started, but maybe it doesn’t have to be, if the circumstances are correct…” I trailed off.

             “What?” Dean asked, sensing I had more to say.

             “I just think there is something vital we are missing. I don’t think some Bloody Tudor Queen or some woods witch is here in the middle of nowhere Ohio, blowing up the eyeballs of suburban house dads.” The brothers shared a look, but neither one said anything as we pulled into the park where we were supposed to meet with Charlie. She was sitting down at a picnic table, head in her hands as we approached. I had tuned out a little when Sam had asked her what happened. I was running over all the different Bloody Mary legends I had read in my head, but I kept coming to a dead end.

             “And they found her on the bathroom floor. And her – her eyes. They were gone.” She finished.

             “I’m sorry.”

             “And she said it.” She began, completely missing the look the brothers shared over her head. “I heard her say it. But it couldn’t be because of that. I’m insane, right?”

             “No, you’re not insane.” Dean told her.

             “Oh God, that makes me feel so much worse…”

             “Look. We think something’s happening here. Something that can’t be explained.” Sam began.

             “And we’re gonna stop it, but we could use your help.” Dean finished. 

                The three of us had parked the car up the street a little ways from Jill’s house. We had decided that we would sneak in through the window and Charlie would let us in. I hadn’t thought that it would be a good idea for the four of us to barge in. Sam went up first, climbing up and waiting on the roof by Jill’s bedroom window. I was next, jumping up and grabbing onto the edge of the roof, I pulled myself up, turning back to watch Dean.

             “Need any help, handsome?” I asked him, but he just scowled at me and copied my actions.

             “I got it.” He said defensively.

             “Mm-hm.” I replied, watching him pull himself up on the roof. I could see the muscles in his arms and chest flexing with every move he made and I had to fight the urge to run my fingers over them.

             “What did you tell Jill’s mom?” Sam asked Charlie as she opened the window to let us in.

             “Just that I needed some time alone with Jill’s pictures and things.” She told us. Sam had gotten in the window, turning around with his hand out to help me. I pulled myself in, sitting the bag I had carried in down on the floor as Sam started to go through it. Dean was next in the window, almost tripping, but catching himself at the last minute. I smiled to myself, looking away so he didn’t know I had caught him. Closing the curtain, he joined us. “I hate lying to her.” Charlie finished speaking.

             “Trust us, this is for the greater good.” He told her. “Hit the lights.”

             “What are you guys looking for?” Charlie asked as she turned off the lights.

             “We’ll let you know as soon as we find it.” Sam had pulled the camera out of the bag I had packed, handing it to Dean so he could get it ready for our exploration.

             “Hey, night vision.” Sam commented.

             “Perfect.” I said. “Since you idiots can’t see in the dark.” I joked at them.

             “Brat.” Came Dean’s response as he handed the camera back to Sam, who in turn pointed it to me. “Does she look like Paris Hilton?”

             “You wish.” I snarked.

             “Na.” Was his reply. Confused, I shook my head before looking around the room.

             “So, I don’t get it. I mean… the first victim didn’t summon Mary, and the second victim did. How’s she choosing them?” Sam asked, pointing the camera at the mirror on the closet door. I had walked into the bathroom to look around, but nothing had stuck out at me.

             “Beats me.” Dean answered him. “I want to know why Jill said it in the first place.”

             “It was just a joke.” Charlie told him.

             “Yeah, well, somebody’s gonna say it again, it’s just a matter of time.” He responded, voice hardening. I was about to rejoin them out in the main room when the faint smell of blood hit my nose. Following it, I found myself standing in front of the bathroom mirror. I couldn’t see anything unusual about it, but I wondered if Valkyrie could, so I closed my eyes and turned on her vision. When I opened my eyes, that’s when I saw it. Blood. Running out from behind the mirror, down the wall.

             “Guys.” I called out. Both of them following my voice and joining me in the bathroom.

             “What?” Dean asked me. Instead of answering him, I just pointed. “I don’t see anything.” He said.

             “Sam, the camera.” I instructed. Holding it up in his hand, he aimed it where I was pointing, the blood becoming visible.

             “Hey.” He began. “There’s a black light in the trunk, right?” Dean turned to retrieve it as Sam pulled the mirror off the wall. We laid it down on Jill’s bed right as Dean made it back into the room, tossing the light to Sam. I turned over the mirror and peeled off the paper covering the back of it to see the words ‘Gary Bryman’ written in blood.

             “Who’s Gary Bryman?” I asked Charlie

             “Gary Bryman?” She asked.

             “You know who it is?” Sam asked her again.

             “No.” She answered us. “Wait, how did you know that was there? The light wasn’t on yet.”

             “She’s special.” Dean answered for me. Shooting him a grateful look, I packed everything back up into the bag, hosting it up over my shoulder again.

             “Let’s get back to the park and Sam can go figure out who Gary Bryman is.” I told the boys, turning to head back towards the window.

             “Yeah, okay.” Came Dean’s response as he followed me.

             “Thank you.” I whispered to him as soon as we were out of the window. He just nodded with a small smile before hopping down off of the roof, waiting for Sam and I to join him. 

                “When you said she was special, what did you mean?” I heard Charlie asking Dean. I was sitting a little ways away from them, leaning up against a tree reading my book.

             “She’s different. Different from us..” he began. “You and me, normal people. She’s able to do things that we could only dream about.”

             “Is she your girlfriend?”

             “What? No…” he trailed off. “She’s not mine. But she’s special none the less.” Came his response.

             “You care about her though.” Came Charlie’s response.

             “What makes you say that?”

             “Your eyes follow her wherever she goes.” She began. “Don’t worry, she’s the same way.” She followed up quickly. “It’s not just you.”

             “You know…” He trailed off. “She can hear everything we are saying right now.” He told her. I could hear the smirk in her voice.

             “No way.”

             “Oh yeah. In fact, would you like me to tell you what happens on the last page of that book she’s reading?”

             “Dean Winchester, if you say one more word, I will rip out your spine.” I called over to him.

             “Told you.” He said, laughing quietly. Charlie looked scared as I stood up and started walking towards them.

             “She’s not, actually going to do that, is she?”

             “Na, she’s like…” Dean paused, contemplating how to say whatever it was he was thinking. “She’s like a pretty little wolf cub. They think they are a lot bigger than they actually are.” He said, grinning at me.

             “Keep talking, Sugar, and my pretty little wolf claws are going to find their way into the seats of your precious Impala.” I threatened.

             “You wouldn’t.” He was actually starting to look scared.

             “Wouldn’t I?”

             “Sam, back me up here.” Dean said, speaking to his brother who had just joined us.

             “Nik, you love that car almost as much as Dean does. Down puppy.”

             “Fine. So maybe not baby, but that just means I’ll have to find another place to dig my claws.” I said, my fingers finding their way to Dean’s stomach.

             “Are you threatening me, Princess?”

             “No, Sugar, it’s a promise…”

             “So, anyway.” Sam cut in, pushing his way in between Dean and I with a small laugh and a shake of his head. “Gary Bryman was an 8-year-old boy.” He began, sitting down next to Charlie on the bench. “Two years ago, he was killed in a hit and run. The car was described as a black Toyota Camry. But nobody got the plates or saw the driver.”

             “Oh my God.” Charlie exclaimed.

             “What?”

             “Jill drove that car.” She answered him. I turned to face Dean, my thoughts coming out of his mouth.

             “We need to get back to your friend Donna’s house.” He said, as he grabbed me and pulled me back to the car.

We found ourselves in the Shoemaker’s bathroom with the mirror pulled down off the wall. 

“Whatcha got, princess?” Dean asked me. They had decided not too bring in the blacklight, less questions.  

“Linda Shoemaker.” I answered him. I glanced up to see the brothers sharing a look before Dean turned and made his way back downstairs.  

‘This is about to get uncomfortable.’ 

‘Did this dude really kill his wife?’ 

‘I don’t know, but Dean looks pissed.’ I took off after him, Sam hot on my heels.  

“Why are you asking me this?” Donna’s voice rang out. Dean had asked her about her mother’s death.  

“Look, we’re sorry, but it’s important.” Sam spoke up.  

“Yeah. Linda’s my mom okay? She overdosed on sleeping pills, it was an accident, and that’s it.” She said, getting more upset with each word spoken. “I think you should leave.”  

“Now Donna, just listen.” Dean started to speak, but she cut him off.  

“Get out of my house!” She yelled at him, running past him and up the stairs.  

“Oh my god. Do you really think her dad could’ve killed her mom?” Charlie asked us.  

“Maybe.” Sam answered her.  

“I think I should stick around.” She said, looking up the stairs in the direction Donna had run off in.  

“All right.” Dean said. “Whatever you do, don’t -” Dean started to speak, but Charlie cut him off.  

“Believe me, I won’t say it.”

The boys and I had made our way back to our motel room for the night after I made Dean stop so I could get a burger. I got him some pie so he would stop pouting and now we were sitting around researching again.  

“Wait, wait, wait, you’re doing a nationwide search?” Sam asked, stopping to look over Dean’s shoulder.  

“Yep. The NCIC, the FBI database - at this point any Mary who died in front of a mirror is good enough for me.”  

“But if she’s haunting the town, she should have died in the town.”  

“Not necessarily.” I added.  

“I’m telling you, there’s nothing local, I’ve checked. So unless you got a better idea - “ Dean told him.  

“The way Mary’s choosing her victims, it seems like there’s a pattern.” Sam added.  

“I know, I was thinking the same thing.”  

“With Mr. Shoemaker and Jill’s hit and run.”  

“Both had secrets where people died.” Dean said.  

“RIght. I mean there’s a lot of folklore about mirrors-that they reveal all your lies, all your secrets, that they’re a true reflection of your soul, which is why it’s bad luck to break them.” Sam said.  

“Right, right. So maybe if you’ve got a secret, I mean like a really nasty one where someone died, then Mary sees it, and punishes you for it.”  

“Whether you’re the one that summoned her or not.”  

“Take a look at this.” Dean said, clicking on the laptop a couple of times, printing off a picture to show us.  

“That looks like the same handprint.” I said.  

“Her name was Mary Worthington - an unsolved murder in Fort Wayne, Indiana.”  

“Mary Worthington?” I asked, I couldn’t keep the shock out of my voice in that.  

“That’s what I said, why?”  

“One of the main Bloody Mary legends…” I began, my voice trailing off. “I mean, it’s probably nothing.”  

“Tell me.”  

“Mary Worth.” I began. “She was a witch who lived out in the woods. She would lure small children, little girls, mostly, out in the middle of the night, using them to keep her young. Kind of like the movie Hocus Pocus. When the townsfolk found out what she was doing, they went after her with pitchforks.”  

“I loved that movie…” Dean said.  

“Let me guess…” I said. “Sarah Sanderson?”  

“How’d you know?” He asked me.

“She’s my choice too.” I giggled a little at the smirk that found the way onto his face at that. 

“I was on the job for 35 years – detective for most of that.” The detective began, leading us into his office. “Now everybody packs it in with a few loose ends, but the Mary Worthington murder – that one still gets me.”  

“What exactly happened?" Dean asked him.  

“You kids said you were reporters?” 

“We know Mary was 19, lived by herself.” Sam started.  

��We know she won a few local beauty contests, dreamt of getting out of Indiana, being an actress.” I continued.  

“And we know the night of March 29th, someone broke into her apartment and murdered her, cut our her eyes with a knife.” Sam finished for me.  

“That’s right.”  

“See sir, when we asked you what happened, we wanted to know what you think happened.” Sam explained, sitting down in one of the chairs in front of his desk. Dean guided me to sit in the other, standing right behind it, his hands on the back of the chair. The detective stepped away for a moment, going over to the filing cabinet in the corner of his office, retreiving a couple of files before returning to us.  

“Technically, I’m not supposed to have a copy of this.” He began, opening the file and showing us the same picture Dean had printed off earlier. “Now, see that there? T-R-E? He asked, pointing to the mirror in the picture.  

“Yeah.” Dean said. 

“I think Mary was trying to spell out the name of her killer.”  

“You know who it was?” Sam asked him, leaning forward in his seat.  

“Not for sure. But there was a local man, a surgeon – Trevor Sampson.” He began, pulling out another picture from the file, turning for us to look at. “And I think he cut her up good.”  

“Now, why would he do something like that?” Sam asked. 

“Her diary mentioned a man that she was seeing. She called him by his initial, ‘T’.” The detective began. “Well, her last entry, she was gonna tell ‘T’s wife about their affair.”  

“Yeah, but how do you know it was Sampson who killed her?” Dean asked.  

“It’s hard to say, but the way her eyes were cut out...” He trailed off, lost in the memory of the crime scene. “It was almost professional.”  

“But you could never prove it?” I asked.  

“No. No prints, no witnesses. He was meticulous.”  

“Is he still alive?” Dean asked. 

“Nope.” The detective answered him, sitting down behind his desk. “If you ask me, Mary spent her last living moments trying to expose this guy’s secret. But she never could.” 

“Where’s she buried?” Sam asked.  

“She wasn’t. She was cremated.” The detective answered. Of course she was. 

“What about that mirror?” Dean asked, nodding down to the crime scene photo of Mary. “It’s not in some evidence lockup somewhere is it?”   

“Ah, no. It was returned to Mary’s family a long time ago.”  

“You have the names of her family by any chance?” Sam asked. 

On the way back to Toledo, Sam called the Worthington family, trying to find the mirror. So far, he had called three different numbers with no luck.  

“Oh really? Ah that’s too bad, Mr. Worthington. I would have paid a lot for that mirror. Okay, well maybe next time. All right, thanks.”  

“So?” Dean asked him.  

“So that was Mary’s brother. The mirror was in the family for years, until he sold it one week ago to a store called Estate Antiques. A store in Toledo.”  

“So wherever the mirror goes, that’s where Mary goes?” Dean asked. 

“Her spirit’s definitely tied up with it somehow.”  

“Looks like you were right, princess.” Dean said, winking at me in the rearview mirror. “So Mary dies in front of a mirror, and it draws in her spirit.”  

“Yeah but how could she move through like a hundred different mirrors?” Sam asked.  

“I don’t know, but if the mirror is the source, I say we find it and smash it.”  

“Yah, I don’t know, maybe.” Sam began, but the ringing of his phone cut him off. “Hello?” I could hear Charlie’s frantic voice coming in over the phone, but she was so scared, I couldn’t understand her. “Charlie?”  

“Dean, drive.” I told him. 

I led Charlie into our motel room, sitting her down on one of the beds as the boys worked to cover every reflective surface around us. She had her head buried in my chest, trying to hide. 

“Hey, hey it’s okay.” Sam said. “Hey, you can open up your eyes Charlie. It’s okay, all right?” Charlie slowly her head up, taking a cautious look around. “Now listen. You’re gonna stay right here on this bed, and you’re not gonna look at glass, or anything else that has a reflection, okay? And as long as you do that, she cannot get you.” He told her.  

“But I can’t keep that up forever.” Charlie said sadly. “I’m gonna die, aren’t I?  

“No. No. Not anytime soon.” Sam promised. Dean sat next to me on the bed, leaning forward so he could see her better.  

“All right, Charlie.” He began. “We need to know what happened.”  

“We were in the bathroom. Donna said it.” She started.  

“That’s not what we’re talking about.” I told her, gently.  

“Something happened, didn’t it? In your life... a secret... where someone got hurt.” Dean prodded. I could tell he was trying to be gentle with her, but his patience with this case was starting to run thin. 

“Can you tell us about it?” I asked her. She looked up at me, eyes welling up with tears before she began to speak.  

“I had this boyfriend. I loved him. But he kind of scared me too, you know?” She began. I tried so hard not to let my face show the emotions going through me, but between her emotions rolling through me and my own memories, I knew my struggle was becoming known. “and one night, at his house, we got into this fight. Then I broke up with him, and he got upset, and he said he needed me and he loved me, and he said ’Charlie, if you walk out that door right now, I'm gonna kill myself.’ And you know what I said? I said, ‘Go ahead.’ And I left. How could I say that? How could I leave him like that? I just...I didn't believe him, you know? I should have.” She was full on crying now, her head falling back onto my chest. I held her to me for a moment, rocking her back and forth while she cried, and I didn’t let her go until she had quieted.  

“Charlie, we need to go handle this, but we will be back, yeah?” I told her. Nodding her head, she smiled at me.  

“Thank you.” 

                “You know, her boyfriend killing himself, that’s not really Charlie’s fault.” Dean started. We were driving towards the antique store that bought the mirror.

             “You know as well as I do, spirits don’t exactly see shades of gray, Dean.” Sam said. “Charlie had a secret, someone died, that’s good enough for Mary.”

             “I guess.”

             “You know, I’ve been thinking. It might not be enough to just smash that mirror.” I spoke up.

             “Why, what do you mean?” Dean asked me.

             “Well, Mary’s hard to pin down, right? I mean she moves around from mirror to mirror so who’s to say that she’s not just gonna keep hiding in them forever?” I asked. “So maybe we should try to pin her down, you know, summon her to her mirror and then smash it.”

             “Well, how do you know that’s going to work?” He asked me.

             “I don’t, not for sure.”

             “Well who’s gonna summon her?” I opened my mouth to tell them that I would, but Sam beat me to it.

             “I will. She’ll come after me.” He said.

             “You know what, that’s it.” Dean said, pulling the car over to the road. “This is about Jessica, isn’t it? You think that’s your dirty little secret that you killed her somehow? Sam, this has got to stop, man. I mean, the nightmares and calling her name out in the middle of the night – It’s gonna kill you.” He said, turning in his seat to look at his brother. “Now listen to me – it wasn’t your fault. If you wanna blame something, then blame the thing that killed her. Or hell, why don’t you take a swing at me? I mean, I’m the one that dragged you away from her in the first place.”

             “I don’t blame you.” Sam said quietly.

             “Well, you shouldn’t blame yourself, because there’s nothing you could’ve done.”

             “I could have warned her.”

             “About what? You didn’t know what was gonna happen!” Dean told him sternly. “And besides, all of this isn’t a secret, I mean we know all about it. It’s not gonna work with Mary anyway.”

             “No, you don’t.”

             “I don’t what?”

             “You don’t know all about it. I haven’t told you everything.” Sam answered him. I could feel the shift in the car, the reluctance Sam was emitting, the anger and helplessness radiating off Dean.

             “What are you talking about?”

             “Well it wouldn’t really be a secret if I told you, would it?”

             “No.” Dean said, surprise colored his features before they hardened. “I don’t like it. It’s not gonna happen, forget it.”

             “Dean, that girl back there is going to die unless we do something about it. And you know what? Who knows how many more people are gonna die after that?” Sam said. “Now we’re doing this. You’ve got to let me do this.” His tone was final, but I wasn’t going to let him do it.

             ‘I can do it. I’ll say it before he does. I’ll take this one.’ I told Val.

             ‘It would be wise. We will heal. We can’t let him do it.’

             I caught Dean’s eye in the rearview mirror, shaking my head and pointing at myself. I was letting him know, secretly, that I wouldn’t let Sam put himself in harms way. His grip on the steering wheel tightened, his knuckles turning white, but he didn’t say anything as we pulled up to the shop. He opened my door after he got out, tension flowing off his limbs. I placed my hand on his arm, right above his elbow.

             "Trust me.” I said. He nodded at me before turning away. Sam was already up at the door, knelt down, picking the lock. He pushed the door open, ushering us through it, but I stopped dead in my tracks when I looked up.

             “Well…” Dean started, looking around as well. “That’s just great.” The room was almost nothing BUT mirrors, they were everywhere. “All right, let’s start looking.” He said. We split up, trying to find the mirror, the boys had their flashlights, inspecting every mirror they passed, but I tried to follow my nose. If there was still even the smallest amount of blood on her mirror, I was hoping I would still be able to smell it. I took a few more steps when it hit me. It was faint, but it was there. The metallic smell of iron. Blood. I could tell it was older, it wasn’t fresh, but I could still smell it, so I followed it, finding myself standing in front of the mirror from the picture.

             “Maybe they’ve already sold it.” Dean called from over on my right.

             “I don’t think so.” I replied, the boys finding me shortly after I finished speaking. Dean held up the printed off picture of the crime scene up, comparing the mirrors.

             “That’s it…” He said, sighing. “You sure about this?” He asked Sam, taking the flashlight from him, but I could tell the words were directed at me.

             “Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary, Bloody Mary.” I said quickly before Sam had a chance to.

             “What are you doing, Freya, it was supposed to be me.” Sam yelled at me, pulling me around to face him.

             “She can’t kill me, Sam.” I told him, my voice hard.

             “You don’t know that, not for sure.”

             “What I do know for sure, is that she CAN kill you. Period, Sam.” I responded, raising my voice a little. I wasn’t going to back down from this. Dean stepped in between his brother and I, his hand coming to rest on my collarbone.

             “What’s done is done. Stop arguing over it.” He spoke up, pushing me back a little. Sam just sighed, picking up his crowbar, handing me the second one before shaking his head. Headlights shining through the windows grabbed our attention, causing us to turn to get a better look.

             “I’ll go check that out. Stay here, be careful.” Dean told us as Sam raised his crowbar. “Smash anything that moves.” He walked away. I listened to his footsteps, hearing him swear to himself when he noticed who was outside. I kept one ear on him, making sure he didn’t need any help and the other on the room around me, listening for any sounds of our Bloody Mary.

             “You didn’t have to do that.” Sam spoke, breaking the silence.

             “Sam, you and Dean…” I began. “You guys are all I have. If I can do anything, and I do mean anything, to keep you safe, I’m going to do it.” I told him.

             “Hold it!” I heard from outside.

             “Whoa guys, false alarm, I tripped the system.” Dean tried to explain to the cops outside.

             “Who are you?”

             “I’m the boss’s kid.”

             “You’re Mr. Yamashiro’s kid?” I couldn’t help it, I laughed a little out loud at that.

             “Your brother’s an idiot.” I told Sam, shaking my head, but before I could elaborate, movement over to my left caught my eye. Sam swung at the mirror, shattering it before she appeared in a different mirror. My crowbar met that one, before we lost her again.

             “Come on. Come into this one…” Sam spoke to himself. He was still looking around at the mirrors, scanning for any sight of her when I noticed my reflection in her mirror. I could feel my throat swelling, restricting my breathing and my reflection tilted her head at me. Blood was starting to drip from my eyes, the pressure in my skull was overwhelming and I fell to my knees.

             “It’s your fault. You killed them. You killed your parents.” She said. I could feel my heart beating in my chest now, feeling like it was going to beat right out of my chest. “If it wasn’t for you, they would still be alive. They died because of you. You presented early. Everyone knew that you were going to be special. If you would have just been a normal girl, they would still be alive. You killed Mommy and Daddy. How could you do that? How could you leave them there in that car to die? Why didn’t you save them? YOU COULD HAVE SAVED THEM!” My reflection yelled at me as both Sam and Dean’s crowbars smashed through the mirror at the same time.

             “Freya? Freya!” Dean’s voice cut through the haze of pain shooting through my skull.

             “What happened to princess?” I tried to joke.

             “God, are you okay?” He asked, hands reaching for me. I’m sure my entire face was covered in blood at this point.

             “I will be.” I answered.

             “Come on, come on.” He said, putting an arm under me to pull me up, Sam helping me on the other side. They both started walking me to the car when I heard the crunching of footsteps on the glass. Someone else was here.

             “Boys.” I whispered, trying to turn around. The boys turned with me, facing the shattered mirror behind us, but what we saw was Mary. She had climbed out of the mirror and was now walking towards us. The pain in my head and chest started up again as I fell to the floor, but this time, it wasn’t just me. The boys were being effected too. “No!” I gasped out. But I was having a hard time breathing, let alone moving. Dean, still having a level head, grabbed one of the smaller mirrors beside where he fell, holding it up in front of Mary, making her look at her own reflection.

             “You killed them! All those people! You killed them!” I heard coming from the mirror as Mary herself started to choke, slowly disintegrating into a puddle of blood on the floor. Dean threw the mirror onto the floor, shattering it for good measure as soon as it was over.

             “Hey guys?” Dean said, leaning back on the floor, his hand finding mine and wrapping around it.

             “Yeah?” Sam said.

             “This has got to be like… what, 600 years of bad luck?” He joked, causing Sam and I to chuckle, a wince following directly after. I groaned as I laid there, my head and chest pounding. Dean was the first to recover, helping Sam up before turning to me. “Come on, up you go, Princess.” He said, pulling me to my feet.

             “Let’s get Charlie home.” I told them, limping out to the car. Maybe I hadn’t fully saved Sam from the pain of Mary, but at least he only had to do it once. I healed at an incredibly accelerated rate, but I felt like all seven dwarves had taken up mining in my skull.

             “We’ll be right there, Sam.” Dean told him, motioning for him to go ahead out to the car. Turning to me, he took my face in his hands, turning it back and forth, inspecting me. “Are you okay?” He asked, his eyes softening as he looked at me.

             “I’m okay, Dean.” I promised him.

             “What you did back there, for Sammy…” He began.

             “I’d do it again.” I cut him off. A small smile made it’s way onto his face.

             “No one has ever tried to protect him like I do…” He said, his eyes closing for a moment before he raised them to meet mine. “You have no idea what that means to me.” He was so close, I could feel his breath on my face, the heat from his body seeping into mine. “What you mean to me…” He whispered before closing the gap between us. His lips were such a soft contrast to the hard planes of his body and the callouses on his palms, but as he kissed me, one hand cradling the back of my head, the other rested on my lower back, pulling me into him, nothing else mattered. Nothing else existed except for him and me and this moment, together. He slowly pulled away, resting his forehead against mine for a moment, his breathing unsteady. My eyes were still closed when he lifted his head, but I could feel the small chuckle he let out. “I’ve wanted to do that for a while now.” He told me.

             “I didn’t want you to stop.” I admitted to him, letting my head fall to rest against his chest.

             “There will be time for that later, right now, we shouldn’t keep Sammy waiting, he’ll come looking for us after too long.” He said, but I could feel his reluctance for the moment to end as well. Lifting my head to look at him, I leaned up into him, kissed his lips one more time before turning around and walking away from him.

             “What are you waiting for, sugar? Let’s go.” I teased, walking towards the door, putting a little extra sway on my hips. I could hear him groan behind me as the door started to close and I giggled to myself as I reached the car. That moment, it felt like something monumental had just shifted between us, a line was crossed that we could never uncross and honestly, I wasn’t sure I would even want to. When he kissed me, it was the most complete I had ever felt in my entire life. Like every single thing that had ever happened to me had led to that moment and I wouldn’t take it back for anything. It was all I could think about as we drove to get Charlie. I had ran my finger over my lips more than once and I knew that Dean had caught me in the rearview mirror, but I couldn’t be bothered to care.

             We pulled up in front of Charlie’s house to drop her off, but before she got out of the car, she turned to me and pulled me into a tight hug before turning to the boys.

             “So this is really over?” She asked. Nodding, Dean answered her.

             “Yeah, it’s over.”

             “Thank you.” She said, squeezing my hand before Dean reached back to shake hers. She had just closed the door, turning to head into her house when Sam’s voice stopped her.

             “Charlie?” He called out to her. He waited until she was facing us again before continuing. “Your boyfriend’s death… You really should try to forgive yourself. No matter what you did, you probably couldn’t have stopped it.” He spoke to her. “Sometimes bad things just happen.” She didn’t answer, but she smiled at him before turning to go home.

             “That’s good advice.” Dean spoke up, smacking Sam in the arm as he pulled away from the curb. “Hey, Sam?”

             “Yeah?”

             “Now that this is all over, I want you to tell me what that secret is.”

             “Look… you’re my brother.” He began, then turned to me. “And you’re my best friend, and I’d die for either of you,” He continued, turning back to face Dean. “but there are some things I need to keep to myself.” He said, turning away, staring out the window. I could feel the emotions Dean was fighting when Sam turned away from him, so I reached up between the driver’s seat and the door, my hand coming to rest on his stomach. I wanted him to know that I was there for him. I felt the muscles in his stomach tense up before he relaxed, placing his hand over mine for a moment before he reached back up and held onto the steering wheel. He didn’t say anything, but he didn’t need to. He knew what I was trying to say. Everything would be okay. Sam was okay, I was okay, he was okay. Everything was okay. 

             “Hey, Princess?" Dean's voice called out.

             “Yeah?"

             “Did you ever find out if sloths get mad?"

[toujokaname]

Get Along / Episode 6

Author: Kino Seitaro with Akira

Characters: Arashi, Tatsumi, Kanata, Hokuto, Hiyori

"Though as a unit, we triumphed against Eden, we're still rivals. In the end, I couldn't surpass him."

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Location: Seisoukan Common Room

Season: Winter

Arashi: It's ready, you guys~♪

How about it, take a look at the presentation! I was very careful ♪

Tatsumi: Fufu. Excellent presentation, Arashi-san. I think it looks great.

Arashi: Riight? I love these kinds of delicate tasks ♪

Kanata: The fish I sliced up also turned out to be a part of the "quiche"~

I think it "looks" and "tastes" delicious ♪

Hokuto: Though halfway through, Kazehaya-senpai was doing most of the cooking.

Really, you're pretty dexterous. All I could do was check the heat levels, but do you have cooking expertise as well?

Tatsumi: It's not like that. Since I was hospitalized for a long time after my leg injury, I just paid more attention to meals than others. It's simply the result of my injury.

Well then. Now that we've served everyone—let's eat before it gets cold.

Salmon quiche, Hiyori-san's favorite, and vegetable soup. Served with pickles as garnish.

Hiyori: Yup. It certainly looks perfect! More than enough for amateurs!

The real concern is the taste, though. My tongue can't be easily impressed, you know?

Nom, nom...

Kanata: What do you think? How does the quiche "taste"...? ♪

Hiyori: This taste is...

...Ordinary! Much too ordinary!

I can feel the effort you guys put into this. But as expected, it's hard to make it on the spot, isn't it?

Kanata: I see~ What a "shame".

Tatsumi: We tried our best, but it's no match to what Hiyori-san usually eats.

Hiyori: Yup, it's true. I'll be treating you to a quiche of my recommendation another time, so you can use it as a reference.

But... It made me happy.

The flavor conveyed everyone's sincere feelings, so naturally, it brings a smile to my face—

Fufu, everyone seems to be in a much better mood than yesterday ♪

Hokuto: That's right. At this rate, practice for the reading drama will go smoothly.

We're supposed to perform as five people who get along well. We have to be more closely involved than we usually are.

Hiyori: Mhm, mhm. That's a good goal! Hokuto-kun's "wish" is for the reading drama to be a success. Tatsumi-kun's "wish" is to get along with the members, both of them have made progress ♪

Arashi: Ufufu, that's right. Since I appeared in Kazehaya-senpai's radio show, we've opened up quite a bit to each other. Perhaps I'll tackle my own "wish" next ♪

Kanata: I'd also like to "bathe" with everyone ♪

Hiyori: That's good! Rather than having to work with patience and hardship, the ideal is for everyone to have fun and work toward a single goal.

That's the job of idols who can give hopes and dreams to everyone!

Tatsumi: Fufu. It's Hiyori-san's last job, after all. Everyone can't help but put all their efforts into it. I'm sure the "DJ Classics" episode will turn out wonderfully as well.

(♪~♪~♪~)

Arashi: Oh my, a ringtone...? Sounds like someone's phone is ringing.

Hiyori: ...Oops. Sorry, looks like my parents are calling again. I'm leaving for a bit.

Tatsumi: Understood. If it's going to take a long time, I'll put the food in the freezer—

Hiyori: Ahh, yup. That would be helpful.

I think they're calling me to ask about the preparations for moving out of the dormitory and the selection of a moving company... It's going to take a long time.

Unfortunately, you're going to have to eat without me. We'll meet up at the lesson after this... See you later!

Hokuto: ...Tomoe-senpai. When I see him preparing to move out like this, the realization that he's actually going to retire starts to sink in.

Kanata: That's right~ It was an unexpected "development".

I have been living in the "same room" as "Ohisama"-san. It will make me feel all the more lonely...

Arashi: I get it. Even in Pretty 5, I was always happy to see his cheerfulness and the way he took care of everyone.

I always thought that such fun activities would continue for a long time.

But, I understand that Tomoe-senpai's position doesn't allow for that.

Inheriting the family business, going to a university abroad—those are the normal ways for the son of a distinguished family to live.

Our Tsukasa-chan also persuaded his parents to let him continue to be an idol, but he was super distressed around the time of the Repayment Festival...

Tomoe-senpai must be in a similar situation.

Tatsumi: Being an idol is a relatively new profession. Even if he is one of the best, it would be difficult to get his parents' understanding.

Hokuto: Tomoe-senpai's retirement is a loss for the idol industry.

It's also a personal loss for me. Ever since confronting him at last year's Summer Live, I've admired him as a formidable senior.

Though as a unit, we triumphed against Eden, we're still rivals. In the end, I couldn't surpass him.

At the very least, I'd like to surprise Tomoe-senpai at the end of this job.

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[twdmusicboxmystery]

TWD 11x02: The Talking Dead

Okay, I DO have a details post, which will go up tomorrow. Because Emily was a guest on TTD this week, I thought it would be more important to post this first this week.

P.S. Apologies for the low quality of the pictures. I wasn’t able to get my usual screenshots this week, so I had to take pics of my TV. ;D

Right off the bat, let me say there weren’t any huge, smoking guns about Beth’s return in the episode. In other words, not much that the general audience (GA) would pick up on.

But we’re not the GA, are we? LOTS of suspicious dialogue and symbolism came out of this. Way more than we usually get from TTD. So, let’s dive right in.

The first thing was in the introduction. When Chris Hardwick was introducing his guests, as he always does, he used the phrase, “Beth is back!” That sort of thing always catches our attention and makes us side-eye.

@wdway​ observed that Emily’s outfit was a mixture of black and white/cream colors, Xs, and diamond patterns. In the past, I might not have been entirely swayed by that. (We’re assuming she chooses her own clothes, right?) But there have been too many times in the past when similar things have happened. Like for the S8 premiere when she wore that bright pink top that looked exactly like the pink bra ashtray in Still? Yeah, I’m no longer convinced Emily ISN’T dropping hints through her clothing.

It was also observed that her hair was very long. Whether extensions or not, it was very long (Beth length) and very blond. Might have been another hint.

One of the first questions Chris asked he was what she thought of Maggie’s SURVIVAL. That’s important both because it’s a question about someone who was left for dead surviving and also because Maggie crawling under the train was a direct parallel to Glenn, who was a direct parallel to Beth. So I was definitely side-eyeing that.

At one point, Chris referenced the Commonwealth interrogating people before letting them in, and he asked if Hershel had done that at the farm, would Rick’s group have made it past the screening process. Emily, overall, said yes. But Josh (McDermott who was on with her) said Shane wouldn’t have. They then started talking and making typical fandom jokes about Shane’s craziness.

The reason this made me smile is because Emily often deflects questions by saying she doesn’t remember, or doesn’t know, or that she no longer keeps up with the show. But here, she talked about specific characters and events in specific parts of a season 9 years ago as though she’s VERY familiar with it. It was like, “oh, but that character didn’t do that until minute 32 of episode 8 of season 2. But I don’t know. I don’t really keep up with things anymore.”

Okay, I’m totally exaggerating there. She wasn’t that specific. But that’s what it felt like. The little fibs she tells to keep people from suspecting Beth’s return are showing.

In talking about the significance of Maggie giving Negan a gun, Lauren said something kind of interesting and Beth-ish. She said, and I paraphrase, that Maggie is struggling to hold onto the person she was, rather than giving into who she might become. Just very reminiscent of Beth’s line to Daryl from still. “You gotta stay who you are, not who you were.”

Chris then asked what Beth would have thought of the current Maggie. And he asked specifically, “Would she even recognize her?” Now, of course he meant that in terms of recognizing who she’s become, because Maggie has changed so much as a person since Beth’s death.

But given the memory loss theories and all the surrounding evidence, we really think there’s a good chance Beth won’t recognize Maggie right away. So that was a huge hint to drop.

See what I mean? It’s not that they talked about Beth’s return in a huge, smoking gun sort of way. Rather, they just dropped a lot of hints through dialogue and the way they phrased questions.

The other thing I noticed is that Emily, in answer to the question, said that without Maggie, everyone seemed adrift and as if they didn’t know what to do because they no longer had a leader (until Maggie showed up again) to tell them what to do. Especially since it didn’t directly answer Chris’s question, I felt like maybe Emily was hinting at Beth’s leadership. New sheriff in town, and such.

Then Josh brought the shiv to everyone’s attention. I don’t think I mentioned this yesterday. If not, it will be in tomorrow’s Details post. But we saw Eugene wheedle a piece of wood into a sharp shive/spike and stick it into his sleeve. It was very reminiscent of Beth hiding the scissors in her cast in Coda. And Josh specifically called attention to that scene. He actually compared it to Terminus, rather than Coda, because we saw them trying to create makeshift weapons in the train car in 5x01. But still, it’s all season 5 and revolves around Beth’s arc.

Actually, as they went along through the episode, they did callbacks to various things in S5 a BUNCH of times. Kind of convenient given that Emily is sitting on the couch next to him, no? Both Lauren and Josh mentioned Terminus multiple times in various ways. Which works because Eugene’s group has been around a lot of train cars these past few episodes. But the thing is, they didn’t really equate Eugene’s storyline directly with Terminus. They were simply finding ways/reasons to randomly mention it.

They also brought up Noah’s death multiple times, comparing Gauge’s death to it, since in both cases, people watched them die horribly from behind a glass partition. Totally makes sense, but yet another tie to Beth by really talking about Noah a lot.

Lauren, talking about good vs evil and what people are capable of, a la Maggie’s disturbing cannibal story, said it wasn’t just about what outward choices people make. She pointed to her chest and said, “it’s what’s in here.” That just gave me huge Beth feels from Still, when she said, “…or it kills you. Here.” And pointed to her chest in the same way.

It just felt like they were invoking Beth a lot during this episode.

This next one was kind of the big kahuna. Chris, just out of left field, looked at Emily and asked, “Will Daryl prove Beth right? Will he be the last man standing?”

And that’s important because it has nothing to do with this discussion or this specific episode. Daryl wasn’t even in this episode.

And I have to acknowledge that there’s a good chance Emily was supposed to be on last week, and her appearance was pushed. We just don’t entirely know what happened there. So possibly, they would have asked this last week during a more Daryl-centric discussion. But still, Chris didn’t say that. It wasn’t like, “Oh you were supposed to be on last week and we wanted to ask this…” No. He just launched into it.

Furthermore, Emily knew exactly what he was talking about. Yes, it’s a well-known line of Beth dialogue from Still that she probably would have been familiar with either way, but even so. The “will Daryl prove her right” came directly from Daryl’s origins episode. So again, despite “not keeping up with the show,” she clearly watched the Origins episode and knew what Chris was talking about.

A couple of suspicious things in her answer:

She essential said yes, that she believes Daryl will be the last man standing. But she also said she didn’t think he would be the ONLY last man standing. Then Chris made a joke saying (and I paraphrase), “Yeah, it’s not like Beth could have said, ‘Daryl, you’re going to get a spinoff.’” And they all laughed and joked about it.

Let’s consider her statement first. She said he wouldn’t be the only one who was standing last, but how would she know that? If she doesn’t follow it anymore and is only associated with it as a previous, deceased character, how would she know that.

And yes, you could argue that this was conjecture on her part, but she said with such…I don’t know, authority? As though she knows something we don’t.

I think you can interpret this one of two ways. The first is what I’ve hinted at above: that she knows others besides Daryl will survive to the end of the show. And I totally agree with her on that. While most of us believe, I think, that Daryl will live until the end, I think plenty of others will, too. Rick and Michonne. Probably Carol and Zeke. Hopefully Maggie, though I’m a little more worried about her. You get the idea. But once again, why would Emily know anything about that?

The other way you could interpret it is that this is a statement about Daryl not being alone. He’ll be the last man standing, but he won’t be the ONLY one. He won’t be alone in that, because Beth will be by his side.

And here’s your friendly neighborhood reminder that in an interview with Larry King prior to S5 airing, Gimple confirmed that Daryl will find love in the apocalypse at some point.

Then there’s Chris’s statement about the spinoff. Now, that came from Chris rather than her, but it was still a really random reference. For me, what Chris does or doesn’t know is kind of irrelevant at this point. I personally believe he knows everything and is fully in on Beth’s storyline. But even if I’m wrong about that, these questions come from tptb. If Chris recognizes their significance, he’s being instructed to ask them and direct the conversation in a particular way.

And they way he threw in this mention made it seem like he was equating Beth with the spinoff in some way. Even the way he said, “there’s no way Beth could have known to say…” the thing about the spinoff struck me as interesting. Because back then, I truly don’t believe the writers knew anything about the spinoff. As I like to say, everything changed when Kirkman abruptly ended the comics and the writers decided to pick up all the characters and story lines and move them to a different vehicle: the spinoff. Probably for legal reasons. But they couldn’t have know that would happen back in S4.

There’s also the unspoken implication that, while Beth couldn’t have “known” about the spinoff, she didn’t know about other things. Like her return and Daryl’s fate.

Emily even told a story about how when they were getting ready to film the porch scene for Still, both she and Norman were hounding Angela Kang (not the show runner back then, but the writer of that episode) about the last man standing line. They both wondered if it was some kind of foreshadow. She implied they were both worried that Daryl would die soon because of it.

A few things about that. 1) I don’t think either of them actually believed Daryl was soon to die. I seriously doubt that. This is just one of those stories they tell to illustrate a point. Which leads me to my next point. 2) Clearly they are implying that this IS some sort of foreshadowing. They’re just not being specific about what it foreshadows. 3) Keep this in mind--that they were both asking about what a certain line of dialogue might foreshadow--the next the time actors try to claim they have no idea what anything means or what’s going to happen next. They’re VERY aware of how the writers put these symbols in and are constantly wanting to know where the show is going, just like we are. 

So yeah. I was definitely a fan of that whole discussion.

The Inside the Dead portion referenced some interesting Easter eggs, including Gorbelli foods (seen in Tara’s backstory in S4, which had lots of Beth parallels) and Duane Jones Whiskey (alcohol, Morgan, etc; we’ve compared that with Beth before). Kinda small potatoes, but still important.

I missed part of this next question, but they asked Emily something about whether she thought the Commonwealth is going to turn out to be a good thing and helpful to Alexandria. She said no. Again, maybe not a smoking gun but given that we think she’s most likely coming through Eugene’s story line, it might have been a hint.

They asked her about the Eugene/Stephanie story line, and she said she was excited for any love story in this world. *coughs Bethyl hint*. She also said she’s suspicious of ‘Stephanie’ (emphasis mine) *coughs plot hint*.

For the quiz, they talked about how many walkers Dog killed in the episode (1). Where Mercer said he went to school (Westpoint). What was interesting, is that they kinda gave something away there. After giving the answer, it said, “Mercer didn’t go to school there, but the actor that played him did.” So, they kind of hinted that Mercer SAID he went to Westpoint, but was lying. Just more evidence that Eugene’s group is being lied to and manipulated. Finally, they had a fill-in-the-blank of Eugene’s dialogue. It was when he asked how he was being processed. And one of the options was “as in bologna and other meant stuffs…” (again, I’m paraphrasing; forgive me if my wording is a little off). Anyway, it said at that moment, Eugene was thinking about Terminus. So, just another callback to that story line in S5.

Near the end, Chris asked Lauren and Emily what they miss most about working together. Lauren’s replay was, again, suspicious. She said Emily was “such a bright light,” which we equated to Norman’s famous description of Beth as Daryl’s light that “went out.” She also talked about how it was a testament to Emily’s goodness that she’s “being so missed.” Which made me think of, “you’re gonna miss me so bad when I’m gone, Daryl Dixon.”

Finally, even before the episode aired, @wdway had a theory about Emily being in the studio for the episode, rather than via satellite. Well, I guess it was more of a hope than an actual theory. Now that the episode has aired, it’s an actual theory. 

See, she had a hunch that maybe the Commonwealth story lines (what Josh should be filming right now) might be filmed in studio, rather than on location in Georgia. And there IS an AMC studio in L.A. What we saw--Josh in person on the show while Lauren was there via satellite because she’s in Georgia--does seem to back up this idea. Or at least the possibility. 

The fact that Emily was also there in person could be a coincidence. But it could also possibly mean that she’s filming in studio for the Commonwealth story line as well. @wdway​ thought of this because we think she’ll first come through Eugene’s arc, and none of the Commonwealth stuff is being filmed on the main Alexandria lots where people generally look for spoilers.

Not something that can be proven either way, of course. But a great theory that I’m 100% behind! 

Okay, that’s it for TTD (but that was a LOT) and it makes me super happy. Together with the screeners not being able to talk about episodes moving forward, I think we’ll see Beth very soon. Any references in TTD that I missed?

[beatricethecat2]

"A road trip? How exciting!" Jeanie exclaims.

"They gave you that much time off?" Warren gruffs.

"I'm still working. Sometimes," Myka explains.

"Often," Helena quips.

"And you're still...doing whatever it is you do? For the Secret Service? You never did explain," Jeanie asks.

"'Secret' and 'in-service of' the government, yeah," Myka answers.

"A-And what do you do, Helena?" Jeanie asks.

"I..." Helena glances at Myka.

"...work at a rare book collection. In Montreal," Myka adds.

"For a private patron, specializing in Victorian tomes," Helena elaborates.

"Dad, you should show her your collection."

"Oh, I don't know," Warren grumbles. "Won't be as fancy as she's used to."

"So you're Canadian?" Jeanie presses.

"No, English," Helena says.

"But you work in Canada?"

"It is a British commonwealth."

"Was," Myka snips. "Was a British Commonwealth."

"Is." Helena shoots Myka a firm glance. "Hence the Queen on their currency. I'm not being—"

"But you are sometimes."

"I'm aware," Helena snaps. "I researched my residence. It was easier to obtain a visa there due to my UK passport."

"You only have a British one?"

"Yes."

"Really?"

"Why?"

"I thought they'd give you a..." Myka glances at her parents. "Never mind."

A beat passes as the conversation hits a lull.

"How long did you say you've been traveling?" Jeanie inquires.

"A few months?" Myka looks at Helena for confirmation.

"Two and a half."

"And you've been able to leave work that long?" Jeanie asks Helena.

"I've made arrangements."

Jeanie looks between the two of them, wheels turning in her head. "Did you meet in Montreal? When were you there, honey?" she asks Myka.

"We, um, met a few years earlier." Myka's hands twist together on her lap.

The room quiets as both Myka and Helena fail to elaborate.

"Did something happen at work like last time?" Warren throws out.

"No," Myka answers, a little too forcefully and Helena shies away from her shoulder. She looks in Helena's direction, but Helena won't meet her gaze.

"Something else happened. A few things, actually."

"They don't know about your--"

"No. I went looking for you after my surgery. Then this trip happened—"

"Surgery?" Warren blurts.

"Tumor on my ovaries. They thought it was cancer, but it turned out benign. I didn't tell anyone, but Pete knew something was off. He picked me up from my biopsy and a few weeks later, they cut it out."

"Oh, Myka," Jeanie says.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Warren asks.

"Work was so crazy, I didn't have time," Myka says.

"You were still working?" Jeanie asks.

"You should have stayed with us," Warren adds.

"Tracy just had the baby, and I didn't want you to worry—"

"Baby?" Helena looks at Myka, brow raised.

"I told you, didn't I?"

"I think I would have recalled."

"Sorry. He's what," Myka says, looking at her mom, "three, four months old now?"

"Four and a half. Does your sister know any of this? About you being sick?"

"No. I haven't talked to her much—"

"You've not seen your sister's child?" Helena's whole body turns as she glares at Myka incredulously. 

"I-I was recovering. Then I went to find you," Myka says, her tone small. "A-And, it's a baby, right? It just sort of lies there, drooling. I thought I'd wait until he was...walking or something."

"That will take quite some time."

"I saw pictures. I texted I'd see him at Christmas."

Helena and Jeanne share a look of judgement.

"What? I don't get the whole 'having kids' thing."

"You will when you find the right fellow," Warren advises.

"Dad, that's not..." Myka starts, then stops with a breathy grunt. "Helena and I are dating, OK?"

"Oh." Warren's eyes dart to Helena, his expression minimally surprised. "The right woman then."

"You two are dating?" Jeanie asks.

"I thought you could tell."

"You do seem close, which is unusual for you," Jeanie mumbles nodding thoughtfully to herself.

"So surgery and a new beau. Keeping secrets again, Myka? I thought we moved past that," Warren says.

"Helena's not a secre--' Myka's phone rings. "Oh, thank god." She hits accept. "Agent Bering...yes...hang on a sec," she says, striding out of the room.

Helena sits up straighter as all eyes fall on her.

"What's your position on kids?" Warren asks Helena.

"Myka doesn't want them, Warren," Jeanne says, lips pursed.

"Yes, but I'm asking her," Warren points with his eyes to Helena.

"I'm...inclined to agree with Mrs. Bering."

"Oh, Jeanie, please," Jeanie says to Helena. "No need to pressure the poor girl. You have one grandkid already. Be happy with that."

"But Myka's the smart one," Warren says.

"Oh, now you're on her side?" Jeanie quips. "All those years you pushed her—"

"Wells..." Warren interrupts, eyes on Helena. "Myka said your last name is Wells?"

"That is correct."

"Any relation to the author?"

Helena opens her mouth to answer just as Myka swoops in. "Distant," she says and pokes Helena with her elbow as she sits.

"What did they want," Helena asks.

"There's a thing nearby."

"And?" Helena frowns.

"I told them maybe."

"You should have said no. We're otherwise engaged." Helena nods towards Myka's parents.

"You work with Myka at...whatever it is she does?" Jeanie asks.

"She helps out sometimes," Myka explains.

"Often," Helena adds.

"Don't you have to be an agent?"

"She's a former one."

"But she's not American," Warren says.

"It's...a partnership. Of a kind. Not worth explaining."

"Go on," Warren grumbles. "Keep keeping us in the dark."

"You didn't tell me about your cataract surgery."

"We didn't want you to worry," Jeanie says. "They said it was routine."

Myka frowns.

The room quiets again.

"Your shop is quite impressive, Mr. Bering," Helena says, speaking up to fill the pause. "I'm curious about your collection. Myka's told me wonderful things."

"Ach, call me Warren," Warren says, his tone softening. "Let me dig out my Wells first editions. I'll meet you two in the back."

"Sure, Dad," Myka says, watching him leave the room. 

"Be civil with him," Myka whispers to Helena. "This was your idea."

"I'm aware--"

"Should we order Chinese or are you two not staying for dinner?" Jeanie asks, rising from the couch.

"We have that thing," Myka says, flashing her phone at Helena.

"Which can wait," Helena snips. "We'd be pleased to join you."

"Good," Jeanie says, her expression brightening. "Myka can tell us more about her surgery. I'll get you that moo shu pork you always liked."

"I haven't liked that since I was twelve."

"Oh, that's right...before your 'vegetarian' phase."

"Do tell," Helena says, perking up.

"She's thin now, but you should have seen her then. A beanpole!"

"I was still growing!"

"You lived on lettuce and Twizzlers."

"She still does."

"Hey, I pigged out at that barbecue place. You were the one picking at it."

"I wasn't familiar with the offerings."

"They don't have barbecue in England?" Jeanie asks.

"Not in her day," Myka pokes.

"That never gets old, does it." 

"Nope!" 

Helena scowls as Myka grins.

Jeanie looks on, confused.

"Order whatever, Mom. It'll be fine. We should go meet Dad."

"No, I'll bring you two the menu. I don't want to get the wrong thing. Or maybe we should get pizza? You have that in England, don't you, Helena?"

"Not in my day," Helena snips at Myka.

"Myka!" Warren bellows.

"Coming, Dad!" Myka looks at Jeanie. "Whatever you get is fine. Let's go." She grabs Helena's hand and drags her out of the room.

Jeanie shakes her head but smiles to herself as she watches them leave.

-----------------

Bering and Wells: Travelogged ("Warehouse 13" Season 5 replacement) Season 1: Episode 6 Title: Colorado Springs: Rocky Mountain Way

Summary: Our intrepid pair travel north-east from Mesa Verde, meandering through the Rocky Mountains, hitting spots both familiar and new. As they descend from Pike's Peak, a last minute decision lands them on the Bering and Sons doorstep, with little, if any, prep work put into what meeting Myka's family might entail.

Previously: Episode 1, Episode 2, Episode 3, Episode 4, Episode 5

-----------------

***BONUS SCENE***

"Why don't you allow me to assist," Helena offers, hovering just behind Tracy.

"What's she saying?" Tracy asks Myka.

"Let her make the tea," Myka interprets.

"It's just tea, Myka. I'm not that sleep-deprived."

Helena looks at Myka, her exasperation evident.

"But she's English," Myka explains.

"So?"

"She can make it better."

"It's tea Myka, not rocket science."

"There is a science to it," Helena says, stepping closer to inspect Tracy's setup. "What sort of tea are you serving?"

"The kind with caffeine." Tracy pours water into the teapot and plucks four unlabelled bags from a silver plastic sheath. She plops the bags in the pot and covers it with the lid. "I don't remember the brand. I threw the box out and stuffed them in this one." She hands the box to Helena.

Helena's face droops.

"Helena's kind of a tea expert," Myka explains. "Maybe not as much as Steve--"

"Why didn't you say so! I have the fancy kind." Tracy rustles around the pantry and hands Myka boxes one by one. "Here's Raspberry Zinger and, um, some mint thing, and Sleepytime, but you wouldn't want that now. And I think..." She reaches deep into the cabinet and hauls out a tin. "African Autumn. I won it at a raffle at Kevin's work. But it's loose, not in bags. Such a hassle."

"Yes, indeed," Helena says, her tone slightly mocking. She takes the tin and scours its ingredients.

"How much sleep are you getting?" Myka asks.

"Not much. The kid needs fed all the time, and I'm the milk dispenser." Tracy cups a breast and jiggles it up and down.

Myka wrinkles her nose.

"Too gross for you, huh sis?" Tracy says.

"This ties in nicely to yesterday's conversation with your parents," Helena says.

"Aw, don't..." Myka says.

Tracy twirls around and faces Helena. "Don't listen to her. What did Mom and Dad say?"

"They seemed surprised...no, your father seemed surprised to hear Myka holds no interest in procreating."

"Myka, with kids? Ha! I'd love to see that." Tracy smacks Myka on the arm.

"I could if I wanted to," Myka mumbles, rubbing the smacked area.

"You'd be an excellent mother," Helena says.

 "You think so?"

"A helicopter parent, totally. She'd have a spreadsheet for every little thing. Dinner now. Nap now. And if the kid went off script..." Tracy gives an eye roll and a dismissive wave. "Do you have kids?" she asks Helena.

"Not at present."

"Do you want some?"

"I've made my peace with the subject," Helena says, adding a sage head nod.

"Too old?"

"Ha!" Myka's hand flies up to cover her huge grin.

"In a sense," Helena says, scowling.

A tinny cry directs all eyes to the baby monitor.

"Annnd he's up." Tracy groans. "Let me go grab him. I'll meet you in the living room."

"OK," Myka says, eyeing the teapot. "We'll just--"

"Go. Sit!" Tracy says, looking over her shoulder before leaving the room.

Myka and Helena shuffle off and settle on the couch.

"I'm sorry about all this kid stuff," Myka says.

"Twas I that 'poked the bear' today, so to speak," Helena says, scooting closer to Myka. "Did you not mention the child earlier because you thought it would upset me?"

"Maybe? I think it's more I felt guilty about not being as excited as everyone kept telling me I was supposed to be. So I just blocked it out."

"I see."

"Look, I know you were an uber-mom and everything, but is it ok with you how I feel? I don't want to ruin this." Myka takes hold of Helena's hands.

"I have made my peace with the subject. You saw the shell of a person I became to live out a fantasy of family."

"Yeah, but...and it pains me to say this, part of you was happy there."

"Fleetingly," Helena says, looking down at their intertwined hands, squeezing lightly. "But I do believe I'll make a better partner to you because of it, if that means anything."

"P-Partner?"

"Is that not the correct phrase? I have much to learn about modern terminology."

"It is if you...if you think I'm..."

Myka drifts towards an already leaning in Helena, their lips barely touching when...

"Here we are!" Tracy blurts, smiling down at the baby as she walks in. "Your nephew!" She displays the child to Myka.

"Hey, little buddy!" Myka smiles a toothy, performative smile, her eyes opening wider and rounder than usual.

"Waaahh," the baby cries.

"Did Aunt Myka scare you," Tracy says, bouncing him in her arms as his cries continue.

"All I did was smile!"

"Weirdly," Tracy grumps. "He's fussy sometimes."

"May I?" Helena asks, rising, holding out her hands.

"Knock yourself out," Tracy says, gently laying the baby and blanket in Helena's arms.

Helena cradles the boy and rocks him back and forth. "Shhh," she whispers from time to time. His cries decrease in length and volume until he gurgles and quiets down.

"There you are, little one," Helena says, her broad smile echoing her shining eyes. She shifts him to one side and pokes a finger into his tiny hand.

"Myka, your face!" Tracy blurts.

Myka stares at the scene in front of her. "You're r-really good at that," she says.

"I'd have suggested a nip of gin if he wouldn't quiet. But this one's an angel," Helena says.

"For him or for me?" Tracy asks.

"Perhaps both," Helena says, passing the baby back to Tracy. "He seems a tad peckish."

"Eternally," Tracy grumbles, settling into the rocking chair.

"Are you alright?" Helena asks Myka as she returns to the couch.

"I've never seen you smile like that."

"And it disturbed you?"

"No, it was...nice. Brighter than usual." 

"Brighter than for you?"

"Just...different."

"I do have a soft spot for infants--"

"So you were about to kiss when I walked in. I knew it!" Tracy blurts.

"Mom didn't tell you--whoa!" Myka shields her eyes as the baby latches onto Tracy's breast.

"All mom said was you were here with your girlfriend."

"Y-You couldn't give him a bottle?" Myka says.

"It's natural, Myka."

"But you're my sister, and that's your boob."

"I'm pleased wet nurses are out of fashion," Helena quips.

"Gin? Wet nurses? How old are you?" Tracy asks.

"Ugh," Myka grunts, face wrinkling as she chances a glance at Tracy. "What'd Mom say again?"

"You were here with your girlfriend. I thought she meant bestie."

"No girlfriend." Myka slips her hand into Helena's and smiles triumphantly.

"Leave it to Mom to understate that," Tracy says, her free hand reaching towards the end table but falling inches short of her goal.

"Allow me." Helena springs up and hands the towel to Tracy.

"Thank you." Tracy blots milk off of the baby's face and her chest. "Ugh, I completely forgot about the tea!" she says, looking up at Helena.

"Not to worry, I'll tend to it. Is there anything else you need?"

"A modesty curtain for Myka?" Tracy jokes.

Myka sticks her tongue out. Tracy reciprocates.

"Milk and sugar?" Helena asks.

"Yes, please," Tracy answers.

"Black for you, I know," Helena says to Myka. "Barbarian."

Myka sticks her tongue out at Helena.

Helena smiles and walks into the kitchen.

"Tell me everything," Tracy says once Helena's out of earshot.

"After you put that thing away," Myka says, pointing with her eyes at Tracy's chest.

"Prude."

"Helena would disagree."

Tracy gasps and throws the milk-stained towel at Myka.

"Gross!" Myka says, ducking away.

"Start talking," Tracy says, buttoning up her top with one hand. "Where on earth did you find her?" Becuase I think I want one, too "

END SCENE

-TBC-

NOTES: No artifacts this time, just a glimpse into family dynamics and H.G. and Myka's budding relationship. I rewatched the episode with Myka's parents to see where that was left in-canon and can't imagine it became more resolved over time. I did a tiny bit of research into Victorian breastfeeding practices and was surprised to have turned up some daguerrotypes/tin types from  the 1840's-60's. Apparently, it was a fashion in the US to have your portrait taken while breastfeeding (infant mortality being what is was back then). Look up Hyperallergic's article, "The Victorian-era Daguerrotypes of Women Breastfeeding" for more info. (And yes, nearly everything leads back to photographs somehow with me.) PS: Two more of these and I'll wrap up season one!

[pluviophile-bookworm]

HSMTMTS 2x11: Let us pull up a chair as the dining room proudly presents... the reason for my next mental breakdown

I can't believe myself, honestly. Oversleeping on the one day of the week that I've got something exciting to wake up for? Oh well, I'm up now and I'd better go ahead and do this before my dashboard has showered me with spoilers. I mean, I have never really minded spoilers, but when it comes to this, somehow I do. Though I do wish something had forewarned me about last week's snap ending (get it, 'snap'... I'll see myself out). I'd better dive in already.

Yes, Mr Mazzara, that's what I've been saying for a while! Ok, maybe I haven't been very vocal about it, but it was in the foreground of my mind that they should have asked for Mr Mazzara's help re: transformation! I'm just glad he pointed it out. Not that he could have done much while he was busy playing therapist for his beloved Miss Jenn. Oh well.

Were those Ash and Ricky doing actual paired-up warmups? That is what they should have been doing for weeks now. That and having actual off-stage interactions, too. But I still subscribe to the theory that the gang had some good rehearsals off-screen — otherwise there's no way they could have been this good on stage as we saw in the previews. I said it last time and I'll say it again — not everything is for us to see.

Wow. The one time our leads are in unison, and it is about both being injured. The East High drama club must be cursed — they can't have one production run smoothly and without what can only be described as pure unbridled chaos.

They don't have any understudies? That explains some things... but also how? But also, I'm so happy Ashlyn is going on. No way she would have missed her first (first of many, right?) chance of being the lead because of some 'minor' injury.

Ricky and Nini still can't talk to each other properly. Oh well. Take your time. It's not like I care about this pairing anymore.

Did EJ just use the word 'dig'? Boy, the boy's got it baaaaaad. Also, what is it going to take for these two to realise they're in love? For all we know, they might have that big kiss we're all dreaming of and still be like 'nah, it's nothing, we're buddies'... give me a break! But I mean, at this point they might just be turning into Redlyn 2.0, where even a kiss doesn't define things. But hey, if they do follow in Redlyn's footsteps, that only means good things in their future, right?

What did that fake French git do to my boy Carlos? He's not supposed to look this inanimate until right before the climax of the play! Well, I mean, at least Seb serving as his interpreter means that Seb gets more lines for a bit. Too bad he can't go on for someone with more lines in the play.

Miss Jenn's 'words of inspiration' were less than inspired... yeah, this show's going down. Or it would, if it depended solely on her. Let's hope the kids do better. I mean, I know for a fact they will... at least for about 5 minutes of the thing. There is still room for things to go wrong and I'm scared.

Oh, my sweet boy... I wish I could jump in there and do something to help him feel less nervous. Thing is, if I were there, I'd probably be the most nervous of them all, even if I were playing Townsfolk #3 or something, and everyone's nervousness would rub off on me, and I would be making things worse instead of helping. So yeah, I'm kind of glad I'm not there.

Ahhhh who called it? @redlyncentral was it you? Ash got flowers for her Biggie! And there's a card whose contents we've yet to see. But that doesn't seem to be helping either. My sweet, sweet Reddy... I hope and pray he'll be alright.

Well this is awkward! Who told Mike to show up and shake everything up right now? Miss Jenn is literally on the brink of exploding, and now she's stuck in this completely unnecessary love triangle. She needs some space. And a quiet place to breathe, thanks Mr M for suggesting it.

'Did we forget to build a mote around the school or...' Yeah, you tell her, Rick! That girl whose name I never want to pronounce (because it makes me think of much nicer people and she's making me hate it) has no business being there. She's not... being given a redemption arc, is she now? Some people just don't deserve it. And if hating her is an unpopular opinion now, well, I never did care much about having popular opinions. I can live with that.

'Lily, scram!' Yes, thank you, Natalie! I've always wanted someone who would voice my thoughts in a way that the characters can hear them. Make this girl a main next season, won't you? (Just so we're crystal clear, I mean Natalie, not the other one.)

OMG Mr M is in the play! In a way... I love that!

I love, love, love the way they did the prologue. 'Repulsed [the prince makes an over-the-top gesture of repulsion] by her haggard appearance [the witch shows off her face to the audience]...' I love this. I would pay a lot for a chance to see their entire play, you know?

Oh dear, somebody give my boy Reddy some sort of... medical aid against all the throwing up! I've got a nice pill that helps me with my bad cases of motion sickness. Hey, so maybe I could have helped if I were there after all. Great, now I feel bad. But also, is all the throwing up an excuse on the writers' part to keep my boy off-screen for the majority of this episode? Because it's a really lame excuse.

Gina's 'Many questions' continues to be a mood. What exactly is Miss Jenn expecting from the kids? Last-minute adjustments? No way. This spells disaster.

Was Carlos on vocal rest or something? Because he shines like the star he is... despite all the very obvious nervousness backstage. I mean, I wouldn't have it any other way, but... oh well, I wouldn't say it's unrealistic. In my personal performing experience, the most nervous ones perform the best. (So... what is that saying for my boy Reddy? Good things only.)

I've already had the opportunity to geek out about Be Our Guest yesterday, but... I mean, just look at them! Carlos doesn't need actual candles to be on fire, Ashlyn is stealing the scene without any lines in it, Gina is absolutely gorgeous, and don't even get me started on EJ and Big Red looking at their girls in absolute awe! This is everything!

Aww, look at them! Gina and Ashlyn dancing together, I mean. They're sisters and it really shows. And I love them both so much.

Kourtney is an absolute show-stealer! I'm still upset about some casting choices (one of them is in this scene, doing his absolute best with the crumbs he has been given), but she is absolutely perfect. I think I'll rewind and watch this entire scene again before moving on with the rest of the episode.

I'd just like to point out that Frankie's voice in his lower register is everything!

'You absolutely dusted that stage'... Not EJ making a pun so punny even I could not have thought of it... boy is absolutely smitten!

Not me tearing up when Jordan Fisher appeared as Gina's brother... like, I knew it was happening — I knew it even before it was announced. And I still teared up because, well, it's emotional in-universe and out.

Awww, my boy Reddy is so in love with Ashlyn... I mean, who wouldn't be... but — not Ricky saying Lily might not be as mean as they thought. Especially not to Big Red of all people. To him, she was just as mean as they thought.

'Side hustle project in the south hallway'? Ooh, what is it, I want to know now!

Why do I feel like things are a bit too awkward between Kourtney and Howie? Not that I'm too invested in their relationship, but if it bothered me, imagine how it must feel for the stans.

No, Ash, you absolutely do not need to add any fancy riffs to the song! Especially not just because L... well, that girl did it. You're unique and lovely and a literal Disney princess inside and out. That girl? She's just a wolf in a sparkling golden dress.

Awww... Big Red literally lowers Ash's blood pressure! Those two are such an amazing couple! (Full disclosure, though, he kind of does the same for me too; the other night I had this horrible nightmare, and I woke up in cold sweat in the middle of the night, and then... ok, getting too personal there.) The point is, if even the fantasy of a Big Red hug makes me feel better, imagine what his actual presence would do for Ash at that moment. Where is my boy? Everyone seems to be looking for him.

Oh... guess they took my advice to give the poor boy something for his vomiting issue. Good for whoever thought of it.

And we're back to the Porter siblings... forgive me if I still can't wrap my head around calling Gina's brother Jamie. I don't know about you guys, but thanks to my lovely new friend Paz he will always be Theodore to me. I guess we can headcanon that as his middle name. Anyway, I love it that they made a joke about the hilarious height difference between him and Gina because, well, it's the only thing I can think about when I look at the two of them. It reminds me of me and my little cousin who has been taller than me since she was 10, and is still growing taller now at 13. But, I mean, it's not very hard to be taller than me, since I'm so, so short... ok, this is not about me. Moving on.

Was I the only one who actually laughed out loud at Ricky drinking from the bowl as the Beast? I mean, that part has always made me laugh in the original movie, but something about Ricky's take on it makes it even funnier.

Meanwhile, my girl Ash is absolutely killing it as Belle. Not me having the very same expression as Big Red while watching her... gosh, I love both of them so much! Also, no offence to the rest of the cast, but Julia really is the best vocalist out there. Out of all of them. I said what I said.

My apologies to Ricky, but his voice is just not it when it comes to playing the Beast. Still, with the other option being him putting on that fake deep voice from the audition, I'm glad he didn't.

Ahhhh Portwell nation you ok guys? Since we didn't get them singing Something There, this is very much the next best thing... and boy, is it good!

Those glances between Kourtney and Howie, on the other hand... what on Earth is happening there?

Ok, so you all know just how strongly I feel about Seb's casting as Chip, and yet... boy had one line and absolutely ate it up! Give him an actual singing role next time, Miss Jenn!

EJ being starstruck by Jamie not because he's a big music producer, but because he's Gina's brother... excuse me while I sob!

Excuse me, what!!!! 'A big brother figure'? Boy, this didn't turn out the way I thought it would... now I'm scared.

Way to ruin things, Jamie! And I don't even mean the fact that his name is not Theodore. It doesn't matter what his name is anymore. He might just have put a spanner in the works of Portwell, and they were just doing so well! Ugh, I'm so frustrated. I wish I'd never boarded — what did I call it — 'the majestic S.S. Portwell'. What if it doesn't set sail now?

And there goes another disappointment... Carlos' 'the orchestra hasn't vamped this much since Bop to the Top' line had nothing to do with Seblos, and everything to do with what might still be the downfall of this show. I am not ready.

No. Miss Jenn did not just say that. She did not just tell Ricky — who, may I remind you, not that anyone's forgotten, just fell off of a high place last episode — to 'jump off of something high'. I realise she's under all the pressure, but that is not an excuse. Well, at least she heard herself.

Oh my gods... Nini — well, Nina, actually — did not just call him 'Richard', did she? That's it, that's the point of no return. And well, I kind of wanted them to reach it.

Told you, didn't I? I told you that-girl-who-must-not-be-named was evil! I always follow my intuition and it has not once deceived me. Redeem that, if you can! Guess what? You can't. We've just reached another point of no return.

Wait, a bloody cliffhanger? I cannot handle this. I physically cannot handle this. If you need me, I'll be sitting on my bed in shock, trying to process everything that happened. I'll need a while to get a grip on myself.

[zeppelin-and-unicorns]

Fanfic recommendations part three: Season 7 fix-its

Some of these stories are post season 7 finale, some of them take place during season 7 and diverge from canon. Season 8 who? We don’t know her.

I’ve read and enjoyed all of these stories, they are all worth the read.

(By the way this is a big category, so this post is huge)

All Our Yesterdays by ChronicallyChill

After the events of "Street Fighting Man", Jackie and Hyde wish more than anything that things had happened differently. The next morning, they wake up in the past, on the morning of Vanstock where Jackie promptly makes one dream come true. They are not together—but, soon enough, one change snowballs into another... Time Travel AU.

I didn’t knew if I should’ve placed this story on the season 7 fix-it category or in the AU category, in the end I chose this one, if you think it’s incorrect, please let me know so I can change it.

Okay so this story deserves a special comment because OH MY GOD, it’s incredible. It’s amazing how the author writes the characters so well, and I simply love the addition of Buddy Morgan to the gang.

This story is a WIP, it hasn’t been updated in a while but I still have faith.

121k words, 7 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna, Buddy/Fez

Also available on AO3

As You Wish by c00kiefic

A dark comedic look at love, loss and death. Hyde’s there for Jackie when she needs him the most.

This story is complete.

7k words, 2 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Daddy’s Home by bellamarie

Jackie and Hyde’s relationship has been smooth sailing for the most part since their last break-up in ‘79. As Hyde begins to seriously commit to Jackie, her dad is released from prison and he returns home to supposedly rekindle his relationship with her. Hyde, suspecting that Jack’s intentions aren’t pure, enlists the help of his friends to try and expose Jack for the still crook man that he is. While Hyde may be a paranoid burnout, he knows that the wily politician is up to no good. There is one thing, however, both men have a common interest in: Jackie Burkhart.

Okay so this story basically ignores the existence of season 8, that’s why it’s in this category.

Oh, and I’m pretty sure this is an abandoned story. Unfortunaly. It only has two chapters and damn, I’m dreaming about the day the author will update this, I’m already hooked.

4k words, 2 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Finding the Right Future by springsteenicious

After Chicago, Hyde starts driving to Las Vegas, planning to get over Jackie. His car nearly breaks down in Iowa, forcing him to stop. While he's there, he meets Fortune, a woman who will change the course of his life forever.

This story is complete.

13k words, 8 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Halloween is Over by MistyMountainHop

Eric wants to be scared for Halloween, really scared. Donna proposes a contest, and all their friends are in. But Hyde and Jackie's renewed relationship might not withstand the stress. Donna and Kelso must fight their impulses, and Fez and Eric's chances of survival are slim.

This story is complete.

25k words, 8 chapters.

Rated M

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna

Also Available on AO3

Hyde’s Long Way Home by MistyMountainHop

This story is perfect. It literally has no defects. I love ALL of MIstyMountainHop’s stories, literally, all of them, but this one has a very special place in my heart. It’s complete and it’s definitely worth the read.

Hyde goes on a self-destructive bender after finding Jackie with a towel-wrapped Kelso. The day after that, he wakes up ... and it's the same day as before. He's doomed to live the same day over and over — unless he can figure out a way to live it right.

151k words, 26 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna

Also available on AO3

I’d Have You Anytime by anonymous author

What if Jackie after panicking in her show, gave up? And what if she made an unnatural friendship? Basically a fix it of season 7. If you like a story with good Jackie/Eric friendship moments, I totally recommend this one!

Trigger warning for past eating disorder.

This story is a WIP and it’s being updated frequently.

15k words, 9 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna

I Found a Reason by JoyfulHeartEO

Can Donna help Hyde see the light before he loses the one thing that's most important to him? Or will Jackie decide to leave at all?

Rated T.

9k words, 3 chapters.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, background Eric/Donna

Jackie and Hyde: The Untold Story by Lotusflower655

I was going to place this in the “Hidden Moments” category (spoiler alert, the next category), when I realised this has a different season 7 finale, so... here it is.

Rated M.

12k words, 6 chapters.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Let’s Grow Up Together by yabookreader96

One day Jackie receives a certain letter in the mail, and she finds her life quickly beginning to change. Suddenly she is a grown up navigating life on her own, drifting away from the sleepy little town of Point Place...and from her friends who can't seem to find the courage to discover life outside the Forman basement. Will her friends catch up, or will Jackie be all on her own?

This story is complete.

67k words, 12 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna

Magic by poetdameron

Hyde has never been good at words and Jackie has never been good at waiting, they need to find a balance to stay together. Hopefully, they'll do it before is too late.

16k words, 2 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Also Available on AO3

Please Don’t Say You Love Me (’Cause I Might Not Say It Back) by orphan_account

An alternate take on the end of season 7. Instead of running off to Vegas Hyde downs a couple of beers in the good ol' El Camino before deciding that some things are more important than his pride - i.e. his relationship with Jackie.

This story is complete.

3k words, 2 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Reflections Through the Glass by MistyMountainHop

Okay, this story is quite a trip, and it’s amazing. It’s based on a minisseries called The 10th Kingdom.

Six months after Chicago, Hyde no longer believes in love — or in Jackie. Donna's not speaking to Eric. Kelso's confused about his whole life, and Fez has gone missing. The only way back may be to leave it all behind.

This story is complete, and there’s a sequel, called Beneath a Shattered Sky. Honestly, I love the first story, but the sequel... The sequel is probably one of the best stories I’ve ever read. Those are both very long stories, but they are worth it.

138k words, 46 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna

Season 8 redo by tanith75

This is the most famous story of the fandom for a reason.

The story starts after the s7ep21 episode, so there’s no Chicago problems or people going to Africa over here :) It’s amazingly written, it’s funny as hell, and it honestly feels like I’m watching an episode of the show when I’m reading it. It’s amazing, it’s what should’ve happened in the show.

This story is not complete, but please, don’t let this stop you from reading it.

293k words, 42 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, Eric/Donna, Red/Kitty, Fez/Laurie, Kelso/Brooke

Shade by MistyMountainHop

This story ignores season 8 completely and season 7 is canon, that’s why it’s in this category.

Hyde finds himself homeless on a night where Jackie is without parents. The gift he gave her last Christmas draws him to her, but his attachment lingers past that rainy first night, grows through countless experiences, and leads him across state lines. Their relationship is a high-stakes gamble, but Jackie may fold before Hyde can show all his cards.

This story is complete and it melts my heart every single time I read it.

43k words, 10 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Also Available on AO3

The Seeker by QuarterflashWoman

With Donna and Eric's own relationship kaput, after Eric left Donna at the altar, what does this mean for our favorite opposites-attract couple Steven and Jackie? Wedding bells, baptisms, betrayals, and ultimatums. It's just another year in the lives of those of Point Place.

This is mainly a season 7 hidden moments story until it diverges from canon, and it’s lovely. I wish it was complete, but it’s still worth the read.

121k words, 23 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde, some background Eric/Donna angst.

We’re All Alright by glittermila

In which Hyde and Jackie actually talk things out after he caught Kelso at the motel.

This is a lovely story, and I really enjoyed it, seeing Jackie and Hyde having a mature relationship is everything.

This story is complete.

48k words, 21 chapters.

Rated M.

Pairings: Mainly Jackie/Hyde

Zenmasters: Seasons 3-5 by zdbztumble

I was having a lot of trouble categorizing this story, in the end, I decided that it was a season 7 fix-it of sorts, since season 8 doesn’t exist and season 7 ends in a satisfying way.

This story is a rewrite of some episodes, the author foreshadowed J/H relationship during seasons 3 and 4, and she added some pretty nice J/H moments in some chapters. The author also changed some things in some episodes (like the way J/H get back together after the nurse, and some other things). It’s a pretty good story, I like it a lot.

After "Jackie Bags Hyde," a certain subplot went into hibernation for a season and a half. What if it hadn't? And, if it hadn't, what other surprises would pop up along the way? "Tune in" to find out!

This story is complete.

170k words, 43 chapters.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

One-shots:

A change in fate by KaraSkinner

After leaving Jackie in Chicago, Hyde gets into a car crash and meets an angel that shows him just how bleak life would be if he doesn't change his fate now.

4k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

don’t I love you so by orphan_account

Hyde’d spent so long trying to keep her out, and what had happened? He’d finally opened up the gates, only to realise she’d been there the whole time and had had enough. Love — it was a goddamn Trojan horse.

or; a 7x25 fix it where hyde and jackie talk like adults for once in their damn lives.

4k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Hyde Asks Jackie to Stay by springsteenicious

When Hyde finds Jackie in the basement when she's supposed to be in Chicago, his first instinct is to push her away. Instead, he asks her to stay.

2k words

Rated G.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

I’m not a heartbreaker, so be gentle with mine by FalaZure

It's just a proposal, Hyde's been through worse and really how hard can it be?

or: 5 times Hyde tries to propose to Jackie, and one time he succeeds.

This story ignores season 8 completely, and it’s mainly just fluff, I LOVE it.

12k words.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Jackie Doesn’t Leave Before Getting an Answer by springsteenicious

Jackie stays in Point Place and waits for an answer to her ultimatum. At long last, Hyde gives her one.

2k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Let’s Do It by poetdameron

According to the tags, season 8 does not exist on this story, so off to the season 7 fix-its category you go.

There are things a man should not say after great orgasms on Christmas' Eve, Steven Hyde should have known better.

2k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Moth Drawn to Light by blackorchids

After Hyde sees how good Jackie is with baby Betsy, it makes him start to think.

Ignores the existence of season 8 completely. Just a fluff little one-shot on Hyde’s thoughts about fatherhood.

1k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Our Last Night on Earth by c00kiefic

When Hyde wakes up in the beer warehouse, he decides to actually fight for his girl.

3k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Remember to Breathe by PrefectMoony

She’s all bubblegum laughter, and butter scotch kisses. Hyde thinks he loves her, thinks he’s always loved her. Hates that it’s taken him so long to tell her as much.

Hates it even more that the first time he’s ever told her so is when the break between them is too raw— too jagged— to be able to mend with pretty platitudes.

Beautifully written.

4k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

sighs in my sleep by finkpishnets

“Congratulations,” the nurse says, smile pulled too tight as she glances at Jackie’s unadorned hand.

Jackie wants to shrug it off — “My husband’s getting the ring engraved as an anniversary gift. Isn’t that just so romantic?” — but she can’t find the breath to let the lie trip off her tongue, even in the face of pity.

2k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Street Fighting Man by springsteenicious

Hyde finds Jackie crying at the Packers Game. He tries to fix it.

1k words

Rated G

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

Tea For One by KayRight

The second Mrs. Forman walked in with a letter for him he knew what had happened. Marrying her scared him, but losing her terrified him to his very core. Takes place in Season 7 after Jackie tells Hyde she got a job in Chicago.

2k words.

Rated M.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

The One Where They’re Happy by amidtheflowers

When Jackie and Hyde start dating, it takes the gang a while to see how that relationship even works. Something that creepy and unnatural can't possibly work, right? Meanwhile, Donna wonders why she puts up with any of them.

Adorable, I love this story so much, please read this.

3k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

we’ll be alright by marvelfoodlover

What if Jackie didn't easily forgive the gang after they missed her graduation party?

Season 7 fix-it because it diverges from canon.

2k words.

Rated T.

Pairings: Jackie/Hyde

I think that covers it.

I’ll repeat this at the end of every single post: speaking as someone who writes, it would be really cool if you guys decide to leave a review (or a comment, if the story is on AO3) in the stories you read, especially the unfinished ones. It really motivates the authors, and receiving a compliment is always a mood lifter. I’ve seen some authors updating stories after years because of nice reviews, so… yeah, this is just an idea.

If you think I left out a good story, feel free to reply to this post!

Next category: Hidden Moments

[shimmershae]

My thoughts on Episode 8--For Blood

As always, placed behind a cut for those of you that would rather escape my babbling, lol.  You’re welcome.  

Sadly, I don’t think this is anticipation I feel.  I’m pretty sure it’s dread but okay.  Here we go.  

This episode has to go up from the rock bottom boredom of last week, right?  

Let me preface what I’m about to say with the truth that I in no way hate Maggie.  She’s been with us since Season 2 and I have an emotional attachment to her, mostly due to my love of Glenn and the way he loved her.  She’s not my favorite by any means, but the fact of the matter is, I do like and appreciate her and don’t mind that she is back because it’s nice to have old familiar faces with us to take us into the final season.  That said?  Forcing Maggie front and center after her long absence ultimately, IMHO, has not worked in these first 8 episodes.  I can’t help but feel if ASZ had been the A story with Maggie/Negan and Daryl/Leah/the Reapers the B1 and B2 story?  These episodes would have been better received overall and not feel so much like they’re trying so hard.  Maybe lead me toward the water instead of shoving my head in it next time, Angela?  Hmm?  

Oh goodie.  They’re opening at Meridian.  Should I get my bathroom break out of the way now or give myself an out for later?  Call it Shae’s choice, lol.  

That flicker of a smirk Leah gave to Carver after their mini walk down memory lane had more spark to it than the entirety of her and Daryl’s toxic relationship.  In the future, maybe Angela will lean all in on them instead of Leah and Daryl.  Something tells me Leah knows this “brother” biblically.  

Daryl recognizes Whisperer moves when he sees ‘em.  Somehow, he realizes Maggie and Negan have banded together however reluctantly.  

Pope doing it “Dixon’s” way but not allowing Dixon to do the actual thing shows the level of distrust and paranoia the man still haves for outsiders. 

Look at Daryl chewing his lips with worry for his people.  If he and Leah know each other even a little bit, she has to recognize that as one of his tells.  

Ooohhhh.  Who took the first stab at Wells?  Maggie?  Negan?  Father G?  I swear.  I took my eyes off the “ball” one second and the whole damn play is halfway down the field.  Sorry.  If you cannot tell, I watched football with the fam yesterday, lol.  

The Walking Dead logo didn’t crumble this time.  Interesting.  Parts of it looked like it had been rebuilt.  With brick.  Wood.  Other parts of it looked reclaimed by nature.  Call me crazy, but that almost looks like an eye/part of a face on the first D.  

Okay then.  Babbling nonsense about the logo over, lol.  Tell me.  Please.  Anybody.  How do the events at ASZ line up with the events at Meridian?  Because it’s night and full-blown storming in ASZ and still daylight at Meridian.  But hey.  Thank fuck we’re in ASZ.  

All the babies huddled together giving me feels.  Sorry.  I know some feel they have no place on the show, but I personally enjoy their inclusion from time to time.  It usually plucks hard at my heartstrings.  

Connie tenderly comforting an injured Virgil is sweet, not gonna lie.  

Aww.  Is that Hershel petting a scared RJ’s hair?  Unless it’s a case of me not being able to pick out and place all the little hands, which it most certainly could be, I’m thinking Judith’s got her hand on her knee and that’s Hershel’s hand in RJ’s hair.  Regardless of whose hand is where, it was a sweet little scene.  What can I say?  I’m easy because Baby Glenn and Baby Rick, ya’ll.  

Oh snap.  The windmill’s on fire and pieces of the wall are blowing down main street ASZ like steel tumbleweeds, lol.  

Anybody else having flashbacks to the barn from Season 5?  Good times.  We still had most of Team Family with us then.  They were in a bad place, hurting and lost and just trying to survive--when are they not just trying to survive?--but they were together.  I miss them.  

Carol and Lydia holding each other.  These two, lovelies, have my whole heart.  

Wells is Walker Jerky, Shaw.  Stop wasting your breath.  

“She did.  My enemy.”  I mean, are we supposed to get the impression Maggie’s been a formidable adversary to Pope?  Because she feels more like a roach that simply knows the best rocks to hide under.  Granted, roaches are hard to kill but still.  I’m gonna need them to give us something better than Maggie being Pope’s enemy simply because she didn’t want to give up her home without a fight because this is frankly unbelievable and bordering on stupid.  

Alright.  So they’ve obviously been sowing the seeds of distrust and defiance between Leah and Pope because she doesn’t like losing family but Daryl?  Man?  You and Leah have differing opinions about how family operates.  Trust me on this.  

So.  Three teams, huh?  Aaron fighting the windmill fire, Carol repairing the breach in the wall, Rosita protecting the babies that represent their future.  Choose your fighters, lol.  Seriously, though.  Why do I have the sinking feeling only one group is going to be shown actually doing their thing?  

Listen.  Am I pissed we haven’t gotten the scene we deserve yet between Carol and Connie after all that’s happened and we’re getting crumbs mainly because Angela wrongly feels the Reapers/Maggie & Negan/Daryl & Leah need more focus?  Absolutely.  You bet your sweet asses.  But Melissa fucking McBride just took the crumbs allotted her and made a magnificent, work of art cake out of it trying all on her lonesome to feed us starving Carol fans.  

Bless Connie wanting wanting to go with Carol.  What a show of trust and sister-like solidarity that must have some hate-rotted guts about to turn themselves out.  

I love Kelly and Connie’s sister bond.  No ill will intended, but It takes the good parts of Maggie and Beth and elevates it beyond anything those two ever showed us.  I really feel like that’s a testament to Angel and Lauren’s real life ease with each other.  

Magna choosing to go with Aaron makes me wonder if it’s possible she feels some kind of residual guilt over Connie.  Not guilt for anything she’s actually done, but simply guilt over making it out.  

Virgil volunteering to help.  Okay.  Damn.  I’m honestly starting to like the guy.  

Judith offering to go with her aunt Carol had me all up in my feels.  I mean, granted.  It was a blink and you miss it scene.  We really deserved a longer heart to heart between that little girl and the woman that’s sacrificed so much to keep her safe and loved her for so long, but you know I’ll gobble any and all Judith/Aunt Carol content up.  Seems to me, Little Ass Kicker is just as afraid of letting Aunt Carol out of her sight as Uncle Daryl.  My heart.  

Gracie and Aaron are sweet.  And honestly?  I find them more realistic and true to what normal parents and children would be like in a ZA than Judith and Michonne no matter how much I love that bond.  I mean no disrespect, but I really do.  

“Why am I keeping you around?”  Pope asking the question we’re all wondering.  

Not Apocalypse Popeye comparing Daryl to a stray dog.  Joe from the Claimers already declared Daryl an outside cat that thought he was an indoor cat.  I did have to internally cheer when Daryl was like “I’m ain’t gonna lick it” talking about the helping hand Pope had extended him.  

“Somehow she has turned the dead against the living.  Oh, that’s impressive.”  The thing about Pope respecting Maggie so much as an enemy is I just find it hard to buy, lol.  Like if this had been Carol, yeah.  But Maggie?  Nope.  They’ve mostly shown her (with Gage being the bewildering exception) to be all bark and no bite.  

Has the house in ASZ really become that dilapidated that they can see through its walls?  Because its original owners dodged a bullet if so.  

Look at Grace hero-worshipping Judith.  It’s sweet.  

Virgil telling Judith Michonne would be proud of her is nice but doesn’t feel as earned as if someone like Daryl or Carol that actually knew Michonne well said it.  But maybe that’s the whole point--Judith needs to hear it from someone she knows isn’t going to just say what she wants to hear.  

Call me jaded, it was a touching scene, but also?  It felt designed to allow Judith to move beyond her very normal and realistic feelings of being abandoned by Michonne, even though she gave her the “okay” herself.  Like she’s still a kid.  Wants don’t always line up with feelings.  Anyway.  Cailey continues to be a bright, shining little star and I love how she’s managed to make Judith a true amalgamation of all the people she’s loved who have loved her in return.  Not just Michonne.  I know people like to overlook and cheapen the fact, but it’s taken a village and entire family to raise her from infancy.  

Gracie really should have known better than play in front of the windows during a storm period, but oh well.  Plot point, lol.  

Seriously, though.  I feel like they’ve teased poor Gracie’s demise in a multitude of ways since the beginning of the season.  I hope nothing ultimately comes of it but I fear it will.  All I can say if the worst comes to happen is poor Aaron.  

Where are Negan and Elijah though?  Ouch.  There they are, taking on shrapnel for the cause.  

Ready the what now?  

There’s ASZ’s Baby Sitter Extraordinaire!  Barbara, is it?  That lady’s been putting in the work since Season 5 at least.  

I’ve honestly grown to love Rosita.  More of her and less of Maggie, please and thank you.  

“Let’s stay away from the windows.”  I’m sorry but I had to LMAO at that.  Still a badass moment though.  

Gabe hobbling toward his assigned sentinel.  At least they haven’t forgotten he’s injured like they seemed to forget Daryl was near death last season before the attack on Hilltop, lol.  

“It’s hard to watch something you care about change.”  Listen, Leah.  Chick.  You and Daryl obviously never really knew each other.  It’s always been obvious but I have a feeling “DIxon” is finally going to show you, spoilers or no spoilers.  

WTF are they calling that thing?  Sorry.  I have just as hard a time understanding Pope’s accent as I do Maggie’s sometimes.  

That’s not love that has Daryl telling Leah she can come with him.  That’s care for somebody he used to know.  There is a distinct difference that’s obviously lost on so many.  How can you really and truly love someone you cannot trust?  Especially in Daryl Dixon’s case?

Why does Angela hate us so much?  Giving us all these Reaper scenes and leaving us to simply imagine Carol and Connie and Kelly working side by side to save the wall?  

I think I honestly could have enjoyed this whole Reaper storyline more, at least a little bit anyway, had they not retrofitted a half-assed romance between Daryl and the story’s weakest link and if only they’d made it the B storyline and given earned deference to the goings-on in ASZ instead.  

I wonder if Glenn taught Maggie how to hot write a car?  I miss my baby Glenn.

Apocalypse Popeye is several fries short of a Happy Meal.  What else is new on this show, lol?  

I care for Maggie.  Mostly for nostalgia’s sake and Glenn and Baby Hershel but damn, man.  She’s not actually proven herself got be worth killing your entire “family” for.  But are too far gone, so.  We’ll make allowances.  

I will say at least this episode is not as abysmally biring as last week’s episode.  

Leah finally giving Pope the throat punch he’s been asking for but I’m not fooled she’s on Daryl’s side here.  She’s always been on her own side.  

Look at Father G returning the favor for Maggie saving him in the tower.  Taking Deaver down!  Poor Deaver barely saw the light of day.  

Here comes that woman scorned part.  I can feel it.  

“Pope is dead.  Dixon murdered him.  He’s with the enemy.”  

Please, Angela.  I’m begging you.  Bring Carol into this story and ramp it the fuck up.  You been idling too damn long and the car is fast running outta gas.  

Bitch really has to die to framing Carol’s Pookie.  

Rosita and Lydia and Carol and Connie and Kelly and Magna have literally been holding up this damn show while Angela farts around with the Reapers bullshit.  Honorable mention goes to Aaron but these lovely, badass ladies been putting in the real work and not getting any of the glory.  You just know they’re tired AF.  

Not my babies Lydia and Judith being the cliffhanger!  Oh and Gracie.  Angela?!  A word.  

Listen.  Carol’s already done that fireworks trick.  That Reaper dude owes her royalties.  Granted, it was on a smaller scale but much more impressive for it because she was left to be the sharpshooter.  

Angela has a point.  It is kind of cool how Team Family have learned from their enemies and assimilated their useful points into their own cache of knowledge.  

I truly feel like the Leah/Reaper storyline would have benefitted from a much stronger actress.  Just saying.  

I know Judith annoys some with her precociousness but Cailey just keeps teeing off on what they give her and personally?  I feel she’s so very talented and light years beyond her little acting counterparts so it still works.  

“They’re never gonna choose each other over the people that they’ve loved and fought for because they simply cannot really trust each other.  There’s sort of, like a toxicity at the base of that relationship.”  Straight from Angela’s mouth.  

“At the end of the day, Daryl chose his family.”  Yeah, he did.  That “I belong with you” shit only happened when he felt they were all gone, including the one he loved above all others--Carol.  Fight me.  

Overall impression of the episode?  

On its own, disregarding how much I can’t help resenting how much time I feel has been “wasted” setting this story up, it was much more entertaining than Episode 7 which was only epic in that it was an epic bore.  There was still too much focus on the Reapers when I just just kept wanting to see what was happening at ASZ.  I mean, they cheated us out of Carol and Connie and Kelly working together. Of Aaron and Magna.  Call it personal preference coloring my opinions if you want, but the characters I care about feel like they’ve been shown the backseat for this self-indulgent exploration of Angela’s OC and her version of self-insert FF with Daryl Dixon.  If we can return to Team Family?  The whole Team Family and not just Maggie and Co. against the world?  You’ve got me.  If not?  Well.  You’ll keep losing me by degrees and you don’t want to do that on the final season.  

Anyway.  The ASZ parts were my favorites per usual.  The episode could have used a lot more of those.  

[howtosingit]

I haven't had a chance to fully dive into all the goodies last nights video has produced.. nor have I had a chance to read all your thoughts which you know I crave love . I was dumb and watched 3 911 episodes last night ignoring my ig notification that ronen had shared anything so then I had to go to bed bc of work and work has been crqzy. But anyways I just wanted to hear some of your thoughts and say Tarlos officially fried my brain and I really want to write in the spare time I don't have bc of work 🙈🙊 their soft smiles, kisses, possibly meeting the fam, their date (and let's be honest Carlos was hot as fuck sauntering up to the bar announcing he was tks boyfriend... you know someone got laid that night) sorry not sorry 🙈

Anyways hit me with your thoughts when you're free if you want ❤

LISTEN, LAUREN. I am always up to share my thoughts because they never end and they just keep coming and I have to unleash them somehow or I will definitely explode.

My brain was just like, ALL CAPS SCREAMING, for about 7 hours yesterday, so I’ll leave you to explore that hot mess on my blog if you want. 😅 But, in the time since, I’ve seen a lot of discourse and stuff about the moments that we’ve seen, so I’m going to use this ask as an opportunity to weigh in on everything under the cut...

FIRST, CAN I JUST SAY that at the moment that I am writing this post, we are still trending at #5 and we’ve been in the 4-7 range for at least the past, like, IDK, 18-20 hours maybe?! I LOVE THIS FANDOM AND HOW WE LOSE OUR SHIT AT THE SMALLEST THINGS

Okay, so let me go through this thing and comment on the parts, and then give some general thoughts below:

LOVE that this is a promo entirely about the LGBTQIA+ characters and characters of color. Not exactly surprised that they still tried to put as much Rob Lowe in it as possible (that’s Fox/the writers’ M.O. it seems - to squeeze Rob/Owen in whether he fits or not). Some of his comments were a little awkward, I thought (referring to Paul’s trans storyline as “stuff” makes me go 😬), but whatever. He’s not the point of all of this, so that’s the last I’m going to talk about him.

TOMMY VEGA. I AM READY TO STAN. I love Gina Torres, I already love how much heart and soul she is giving just in these quick peeks, I cannot wait to see her in action!

Also let me use this moment to say that while it’s obvious I’m not getting my Grace + Carlos friendship (that’s fine if it stays in fandom, I’ll live), I’m SO GLAD that her and Tommy are gonna be friends! One promo mentioned that Judd has known Tommy before, so it would not surprise me if they’ve been friends for awhile. LOVE THAT.

SPECULATION: This gives me a good time to just throw out a theory that I’ve been thinking about... We know Owen and Gwen are hosting Tommy at their place for a backyard dinner. I assume her husband may be there as well, and I wouldn’t be surprised if Judd and Grace are there too. 

I ALSO would not be surprised if this is when one of the nights at Carlos’s place happens, like a parallel of the two dinner parties. That at least keeps every main character involved in both locations. We shall see though.

So this gathering at the firehouse seems like it’s going to be a pretty big scene, probably for episode 1. I think everyone’s gathered so that Owen can announce he’s in remission (we’ll hear him tell TK first, which is the hug that they share earlier in the trailer, I think). 

But this gathering also includes a Tommy/Grace moment, a Tarlos moment, the others doing other things kind of moments. It’ll serve the same purpose as a lot of the season 1 bar scenes, and I’m so glad they’ve moved those to the firehouse. I want that place to really start feeling like a home this year. 

(I want all of the locations to feel a little more grounded and special, if I’m being honest. Like, I’m SO GLAD that Carlos’s place is going to be a key location this season.)

There are now two instances of Carlos being next to Gwen (standing next to her while Owen makes an announcement and now sitting next to her at the table), so we better get some dialogue between them or I WILL BE SO UPSET. I WANT GWEN TO STAN CARLOS AS MUCH AS I DO.

EVERYONE IS SO CUTE IN THIS SCENE OKAY

TARLOS TARLOS TARLOS TARLOS

Like, WTF is TK’s face in this moment?! He looks so shy and bashful but also so happy and mushy and soft and in love. And then the way that Carlos softens because of how soft TK look?!?! WHAT IS GOING ON?!?! WHY AM I CRYING.

Seriously, I have to know what they’re talking about though to make TK fucking melt like that. 

Emergency stuff blah blah blah

TARLOS KISS TARLOS KISS TARLOS KISS TARLOS KISS

IT’S SO FUCKING CASUAL AND PERFECT AND NATURAL AND LITERALLY JUST LIKE A “I came over to grab this food from you but since I’m here I might as well grab a kiss because I can’t help myself”

AND LIKE... Carlos just leans right into it?!?!?!? like it’s something that they do all the time?!?!?! WTF I LOVE THEM

Mateo watches this kiss and kind of looks like he was talking to Carlos, TK, or both of them, so I love that they’re like in the middle of conversation but still like “wait let me kiss my bf because he’s close by and so hot and I love him” SCREAMING

ALSO LET ME BE THIRSTY BUT CARLOS’S SHOULDERS AND BACK?!?!?! TK’S FUCKING ARMS?!?! I’M SO DAMN GAY

Speaking of arms: this rando bartender at the wrestling match (so Covid doesn’t last long on Lone Star, I’m assuming like 2 episodes maybe?) -- I love that they tried to put him in a tight shirt and make him look like a possible threat or something and I’m just like 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

IT’S LIKE THEY’VE NEVER SEEN CARLOS REYES BEFORE

AND THEN THE FUCKING GREEK GOD HIMSELF SAUNTERS UP WEARING A TIGHT FUCKING POLO - CHEST OUT, ARMS JACKED, HANDS IN HIS POCKETS TO DRAW ATTENTION TO HIS DICK AND I’M JUST SCREAMING AT THIS POINT

BOYFRIEND 

BOYFRIEND

BOYFRIEND

But, like, seriously, there is no comparison. Carlos is fucking Hercules over here and this no-name wannabe boyband member could be a sand-colored rock for all I care. 

YOU CANNOT COMPETE WITH CARLOS REYES, DON’T EVEN TRY IT

I do feel like these two clips (the calendar line and then Carlos’s line) are spliced together but they might not be back-to-back, and I would love to see how TK responds to the flirting before Carlos comes over

HIS FACE IS KILLING ME THOUGH WHEN CARLOS COMES UP

BLESS RONEN

I feel like I *think* I know what he’s thinking, but I also feel like I don’t. Certainly, the scene seems to end with them both smiling and happy, but I wonder if there will be a conversation about jealousy or something?! IDK BUT THEY’RE DEFINITELY GONNA TALK. I NEED TO KNOW WHAT THEY SAY.

Someone posted how happy TK is going to be to have a boyfriend who is committed enough to him to be jealous, unlike Alex who didn’t care and cheated on him. I certainly think this could be a great moment for them to establish what this new relationship means for them, and I’m excited to see what they writers have planned.

I JUST LOVE CARLOS REYES THOUGH OKAY I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

How many times is Fox gonna use that clip of him holding his gun though? We get it, he raises his gun. I’ve seen it like 7 times at this point. 

I’m not complaining, really. I’ll take his face where I can get it.

LOVING the Marjan clips

LOVING the Grace/Judd clips

LOVING the Paul clips

I LOVE ALL OF MY FAVES

CANNOT WAIT TO SEE THEM DEVELOP THIS YEAR

Hearing Rafa talk about using his voice and speaking for his community just slaughters my heart, I love this man so fucking much and I’m so happy to be discovering him at the start of his career because he is going to go on to do big things and make the world a better place with his positivity and light and love and I’m so excited to follow him on that journey I just love him okay

ALSO THE MAN LOOKS SO FUCKING GOOD WHAT ARE THOSE ARMS I WANT TO DIE

THE FARMER’S MARKET SCENE

Are they shopping for food for the dinner party they’re hosting?! Maybe!

WE MEET SOME OF CARLOS’S PEOPLE

There is so much speculation surrounding who these two people could be, and I’ve heard some super interesting theories about Carlos’s backstory.

I’m gonna be basic though and stick with the fact that I think they’re his parents.

AND IF THEY ARE HIS PARENTS, THEY SEEM SO HAPPY TO MEET TK.

His dad/the man, like, shakes TK’s hand with so much gusto, a giant smile on his face

And Carlos smiles as he hugs his mom/the woman, and she’s smiling too

THEY ALL JUST SEEM SO HAPPY

I CAN’T BELIEVE WE MIGHT ACTUALLY BE AVOIDING THE HOMOPHOBIC PARENTS STORYLINE COMPLETELY

Y’ALL DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW MUCH I DO NOT WANT TO SEE THAT TRAUMA

I mean, I don’t know for sure, we’re going to have to wait for the episode. But god, do I hope for it with every fiber of my being. I want their trauma, if they have to have it, to be separate from their sexuality. They’ve done so well with TK so far, I want the same for Carlos. Let the story be fresh, let it be different, LET US HAVE DIVERSE GAY STORYLINES.

Y’ALL THE TEAM HANGING OUT AT CARLOS’S PLACE

I CANNOT

I’LL NEVER BE OVER IT

HE’S PART OF THE CREW. HE’S PART OF THE FAMILY.

IT’S EVERYTHING THAT I COULD EVER WANT FOR HIM OKAY

I’M SO FUCKING HAPPY

THEY ARE SO HAPPY

WE ARE ALL SO HAPPY

I’M CRYING

I’M DEAD

LOL that was a lot but so was this promo.

Now, some somewhat sobering thoughts...

We all know season 1 had a real diversity and inclusion problem, we’ve seen the numbers. We also know that during the promotion for season 1, we ALSO got a diversity promo focusing on the LGBTQIA+ characters and the characters of color. I love that Fox wants to highlight the incredibly talented actors and characters that they have, but all of it means nothing if they are still tokens on the show. 

I have full faith that season 2 will be better, that some of the justified anger and frustration made it back to the writers and they internalized it and then make some real changes. However, because we did get a diversity promo last year, I have to remain a little cautious. This promo doesn’t really mean anything and if, somehow, season 2 goes the way season 1 did, it will be another instance of Fox using the characters of color to draw people in without actually giving them screentime and development. Which is a HUGE PROBLEM. So... I’m very excited and very hopeful, but also slightly wary.

Similarly, I’ve seen people say that they’re worried that, while there is so much Tarlos in this promo, this might be all the Tarlos we get this season. I don’t share the same concern, but like the diversity issue, I understand where that comes from. There was a lot of Tarlos in season 1′s promos and, as we now know, they got screentime in episodes 1-3 and then virtually nothing until episode 10. 

I kind of lost track of the filming schedule, but I think before they went on the holiday/extended hiatus, they filmed the first 5-6 episodes? Maybe? And we know that we’re getting 14 total this season, which means it’s possible that they haven’t even filmed half of them. 

I think the footage that we got in this promo is from, like, 3 or 4 episodes max. Definitely episodes 1 and 2, maybe 4, possibly 5. The crossover is episode 3 and I am still expecting to barely see Carlos in it - I just think it’s going to be very fire heavy one, especially with the members of the 118 coming in to steal screentime. He could be in one scene, maybe? Idk, I’m just not expecting a lot from that episode. 

And sure, we could get a lot of Tarlos at the beginning and then nothing for a whole string of episodes, but that also just doesn’t seem possible with the way they’ve restructured the relationship dynamics. Like, it really does seem like Carlos is going to be a part of the family this year, so I think it will be easier to include him and harder to delete him entirely. (Please let him at least appear in every single episode, I don’t want to be so fucking angry like last year.)

Also, if all of these scenes stay in the episodes, we are getting AT LEAST 4 Tarlos conversations - the firehouse, the wrestling match, the farmer’s market, the flirting by the truck - and other scenes of them being in the same space as part of a group. I’m sure there will be even more that we’re just not seeing. I’m very optimistic for this season and for the Tarlos content, and I really don’t think we’ll see the front-loaded imbalance that we saw last season. I think when they get back to filming the later episodes, there will be a good amount of Tarlos content in those, too!

I will say, though, that I am worried we’ve just seen the only kiss that they’ll share in the first 5 or so episodes. I’m just so used to network TV placing a limit on gay kisses, and Idk how much that has really changed in recent years. I truly love this kiss, and I hope there are more, but I would not be surprised if we end the season having only gotten like 2-3. (PLEASE LET ME BE WRONG.)

ONLY TWO MORE WEEKS UNTIL WE FIND OUT FOR SURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[just-my-fandom]

One After Another (Cisco Ramon x Allen! Reader)

Chapter 3

Summary; Cisco questions quitting the team after Reader was attacked. Reader has nightmares of the attack.

Takes place in Season 5 Episode 5 and 6

Warning(s); Mentions of miscarriages. Nightmares.

Tag list; @thebloodrobin @badasspolygenderfriend

Story list; Chapter 1 , Chapter 2

. . .

When you wake up, the apartment is eerily quiet. Usually it wouldn’t be a problem for you- but now that you have an infant- it startles you to climb out of bed and rush to the nursery across the hall.

When you find that Dante’s crib in empty, you feel your chest tighten, looking over your shoulder as you move back to the hallway, and to the kitchen, “Cisco?!”

“Morning!” Cisco greets you almost instantly with a kiss to your temple, your eyes moving around him to see Dante holding younger him, bouncing in small circles so young Dante giggled and grabbed for his shirt,

“Why didn’t you tell me he was up?” You breathe, hand at your chest, “I almost had a heart attack,”

“Easy, mami,” Cisco soothes, handing you a glass of (favorite/drink), “He got up early, and I figured you were still exhausted from yesterday so Dante and I already got him up for you,”

“Thanks,” You murmur, Cisco humming as he kisses your lips, turning to Dante now looking at his phone,

“It’s Sherloque,” Dante rolls his eyes, almost instantly so does Cisco, “We’re needed at the labs,”

“Are you gonna be okay here without me?” Cisco asks, and you smile, taking the infant from Dante with a nod,

“Gotta get used to being with him alone anyways,” You remind, “Stay safe, and Caitlins been having some struggles with her dad. Help her?”

“I’ll see what I can do,” Cisco nods, pecking your lips before moving to the door, Dante waving over his shoulder before youre left in silence again,

“Okay,” You heave, looking down at the babbling boy, “What to do...”

. . .

“Well, well, well. Liquid nitrogen,”

Cisco shines his flashlight towards Sherloques voice, stepping up next to him to the giant container, “That’s a potent accelerant, is it not? Oh this place it would have gone up,”

“So all my fathers work is completely gone?”

“Well, not necessarily,” Ralph speaks, “I mean, think about it. Police listed this fire as accidental, but they didn’t know about the connect to your father, so,”

“Ralph, my father told me to come find him,”

“I know that, but a guy who disappears on the night of a warehouse fire and who’s hard to find?”

Ralph pauses when finding a box, lifting it and setting it on the table. Within seconds, Sherloque scoffs in addition to Ralph starting an argument on Caitlins mother,

“Alright!” Cisco shouts, pushing past Ralph to grab the lid of the box, “Give me this!”

The three are forced to watch as their friends nose begins to bleed, body collapsing almost instantly so Caitlin gasped, rushing for her friend on the floor of the factory, “Cisco?”

. . .

“While you were unconscious, I scanned your wounds. There are still trace amounts of aluminum beryllium alloy fused within your hands,” Caitlin turns to Cisco on the med bed next to her, her friend running a hand down his face with a large sigh,

“See, this is- this is what I need,” Cisco laughs, irritably, “I just need rest,”

“No, Cisco, rest is not going to fix this, okay? Every time you vibe or breach, the dark matter is going to affect your central nervous system, causing you more and more pain, every time you cube, you are going to experience more and more seizures,”

“Then what am I supposed to do?” Cisco asks, loudly, sitting up so he could stare at Caitlins startled expression. He sighs and rests his head in his hands, fingers knotting into his dark locks,

“Y/N woke up from a nightmare last night,” He starts, voice quiet as he lifts his head and looks at his hands, “Of when Cicada attacked her at home yesterday, of her going into labor early. She was scared, Caitlin, because I wasn’t there and she was focused on whether or not I’d make it to see our son,”

“But she made it through it, because she’s strong,” Caitlin reassures, Cisco swallowing and shaking his head,

“But what if I hadn’t had made it?” Cisco asks, now looking up his best friend, “What if Y/N had Dante, and learned that I didn’t make it? It would have crushed her, Cait, you know that,”

“I do know that,” Caitlin nods, hand on Cisco’s knee, “When you and her were thinking of baby names, she chose the name Dante for your brother. When future Dante came, she didn’t complain of the fact that Dante looks exactly like you. When she found out Dante has her powers, she secretly wished he was a breacher like you. Because she wanted Dante to grow up to be the man you are today,”

“Y/Ns terrified of her not regaining her powers,” Cisco murmurs, curling his fingers, “She depends on her powers just as much as we all do, Nora said she’d gain them back, but, with the timeline changing and Dante being here a month early-,”

“Like you told her yesterday,” Caitlin reminds, “Her body is still healing from child birth. Both you and her need to trust the process of time,”

Cisco nods, biting his lip to calm his nerves.

. . .

When you wake up again, it’s at two in the morning and in desperate need for air. You find yourself sitting up, only sparing your sleeping husband a glance before you climb out of bed, edging towards the nursery for the third time that night.

Your footsteps are light as they move from hardwood to carpet, your hand tucking hair behind your ear as you lean over the crib, eyes staring at the bundled infant silently in slumber,

A moments pause before a hand touches your arm, a startled yelp escaping your lips so another hand covered your mouth, your eyes flicking up to Cisco’s face shining from the windows moonlighting,

Your brows furrow as you hit his chest, glancing back over to the infant in fear he had awoken, but Cisco is quietly leading you out into the hallway, his own brows pinched with worry,

“Why did you scare me?” You hiss in a whisper, hitting his chest again but then resting your hand in that spot, fingers clutching at his shirt,

“What’re you doing up again?” He whispers back, watching your held tilt towards the nursery, before his hand slides up to your jaw, guiding your eyes back to his in the dark, “Hey,” He murmurs, second hand mirroring the first on your face, “What’s going through your head?”

You clench your jaw and let your eyes flutter shut, opening them so you met Cisco’s eyes, “I had the nightmare again,” You swallow, “But this one was different,”

“How?” Cisco questions,

“I-,” You shrug, blinking so Cisco felt a tear touch his thumb, where he rubs the skin, soothingly, “In this nightmare Dante didn’t survive, him coming early caused complications,”

You sniffle, Cisco shushing you as he pulls you to his front, hand sliding to clutch at your hair,

“Hey,” Cisco whispers, your eyes shutting as you tuck your head under his chin, “We’re okay, baby. All of us,”

“But you almost weren’t,” You remind, Cisco’s eyes shutting as he exhales, “I could have lost either one of you,”

“But you didn’t,” Cisco reminds back, tilting his head down so you looked up, “You’ve got us,”

“Promise?” You plea, Cisco smiling with a nod, his lips pressing against yours, hand at your hip, tightly,

“I promise,” He murmurs, letting you lean back into him before he kisses your head, guiding you to the bedroom footsteps away.

When you wake up the fourth time, you decide sleep wasn’t your friend and settled in the living room, tea in one hand and phone in the other. Four AM. Dante would be waking up soon. Cisco eventually, too.

Your mind drifts back to the nightmares. All four times, all four nightmares were different. Cicada attacking. Early labor. Dante not surviving. Cisco not surviving.

Lucid dreams weren’t common during your pregnancy. You wondered if it was an after effect of pregnancy for you, or if Cicada attacking really took a toll on you.

You hear Cisco before you see him, his figure soon sinks down onto the couch beside you, and in silent motions, he allows you to set down your mug and press yourself against him, his arms tight around your shoulders,

“Do you wanna talk about it?” His whisper is almost ghost like, one leg spread across the couch as the other hung off the side, your body settled between and against his chest,

A small exhale, and you let your ear rest on his chest, “You didn’t make it,”

Cisco’s hand slides up your back and caresses the back of your head, in silence pressing short, slow kisses to your temple and ear,

“You know I’m not leaving, babe,”

“I know,” You murmur, nodding, “I just don’t know why I keep having these nightmares,”

“We can ask Caitlin,” Cisco hums, “See if it’s really an after effect,”

You nod a second time, allowing your body to relax as your eyes flutter shut, breaths evening out. Dante’s short cry causes you to jump, head shooting up to look over the couch, where Cisco sits up, hands on your hips,

“I got him, don’t worry,” He soothes, and you move to sit back in your previous spot, “Finish your tea,”

Your eyes watch as he disappears around the corner, sighing into your cup as you take a needed sip of the warm beverage.

. . .

“Cisco?” Said male looks up at Caitlins call, her and Barry staring at him in concern, “You okay, bud?”

Cisco’s hand runs down his face, elbow propped on his chair in thought, “What if I took a break?” At Caitlins head tilt, he exhales, “From the team?”

“Cisco Ramon,” Your appearance behind him causes him to turn around, sharply. Dante was not with you- Joe and Cecile had suggested a play date day for him and Jenna, “I’m not letting you do that,”

“Y/N,” Cisco sighs, and you shake your head, moving to stand next to Caitlin in front of him,

“No. Cisco, aside from Dante and I, this team is the most important thing to you. I’m not going to let you walk away from it because of my problems,” You hold a finger, “And I know that’s why you’re thinking this,”

“I just don’t want to be the cause of your nightmares,” Cisco states, and you close your eyes, looking down,

“Cisco, whether you’re on the team or not, I’m always going to worry about you, and them,” You nod to Barry and Caitlin, “The past four years, Barry was the pinpoint of my worry. Scared he would end up like our parents. Dante was born, he’s now the center of my worry. I’m always going to be worried- now with metas in Central City, how can I not be?”

You shake your head, “The point is, I’m not letting you leave this team. No questions asked,”

Barry smiles when Cisco leans his head against his chair and looks up at you, patting Caitlins shoulder so she nodded for him to follow her to her lab,

Cisco pushes up from his chair and rounds the control panel, arms wrapping around you, tightly, “I love you. You know that, right?”

“Always,” You smile and look up at him, Cisco cupping your face with a light laugh,

“Let’s catch Cicadas ass,”

[popculturebuffet]

Blog Updates: New Patreon Stretch Goals, Patreon Exclusive Reviews, New Story Arcs and Other Stuff

MHello everyone. For those of you seeing this through other tags my name is Jake. I do reviews on here that are usually full sumaries of an episode of a tv show or comic, with jokes and analsyis throughout. I’m doing this post as i’ve recently revamped by patreon a bit, check out VIA THIS LINK if your curious. I also have some other stuff going on with the blog that I thought might intrest the general public and especially you lovely followers. Thank you guys so much. Your support means a lot and feel free to interact with this post and any of the reviews. it’s always a pleasure. Leave your comments whatever. So let’s start with the patreon stuff

You Decide the Next Patreon Exclusive Review!: 

Yes YOU will decide the Patreon Exclusive review for May. How? It’s simple: i’m currently reviewing the Lilo and Stitch crossover episodes, the first two this week with the American Dragon Jake Long crossover “Morpholomew” done yesterday, the Proud Family episode “Spats” coming later this week, and “Rufus” (Kim Possible) and “Lax” (Recess) coming next week and the week after that respectively. 

As a way to gage intrest in the shows crossed over, and if I should review some of them on their own, i’m going to be watching the notes, and after the first week i’ll record how many a review got. This way the first review dosen’t get an advantage over the last and so on. Whichever episode gets the most votes wins and it’s show will get two reviews: One exclusive to Patreon in may you can check out for just a buck, and one for all of ya in June. So if you want to dragon up, get louder and prouder, check out what the sitch is, or have some recess, keep an eye on my blog and check out the review. Like it reblog, it, both. This is all in your hands. And if this little contest works out I may do another one like it in the future. 

New Patreon Stretch Goals!:

For those unfamiliar with Patreon it’s a site that helps creators like me get paid for their work, used by such luminaries as Linkara, Pushing Up Roses and greatest of all Rifftrax. 

Stretch Goals are an amount of money I get a month from patreons, that’s readers like you paying me. Even a buck a month would help a lot and help me put out a reviews and LIVE off doing this. But it’s a two way street so in order to entice you lovely people into paying me for doing my job and my passion with these reviews, i’ve updated the tiers, adding a wider and better range of rewards. I’m currenntly up to 15 dollars a month, or close enough that i’ve acitivated those rewards. And if you help me hit these tiers EVEYRONE gets PUBLIC, on here, for free reviews. Thanks to my lovely patreons Emma and Kevin you all are getting reviews of the first 5 Ducktales episode, aka Legend of the Golden Suns, with the second coming as soon as I finish this post. Even a buck helps us reach closer and for your dollar you get access to the discord, exclusive reviews, and to pick a short any time I review a bunch of shorts. And with Goofy’s birthday coming up next montha nd Donald’s after that, now is the best time for that. 5 dollar patreons also get one review as month, with 10 dollar ones getting two. You’ve already probably seen some of these: Kev has used one of his a month to have me review a house of mouse episode every month, and newest patreon and longtime friend Emma is using them to have me review the netflix dr. seuss adaptation “Green Eggs and Ham”. So whatever YOU want me to review I will and you’l lhelp unlock even MORE great reviews. So what do you get if you hit the goals? I’m glad you asked. 

We’re up to 15 so next is...

20 Dollar Tier:  Ducktales 87 Season 2 Mini Series!: Yes indeedy. Already on the Docket was the Super Ducktales Arc, which introducices the OG GIZMODUCCCKKKKK. But since that apparenlty wasn’t enough i’ve also added the OTHER mini series. While i’ll do super first since that’s the one with higher fan intrest once tha’ts done i’ll also review Time is Money, the time travel arc bringing in everyone’s faviroite scrappy Bubba. So if you want a buncha cruncha retro Ducktales pony up. But that’s not all the disney afternoon I got for this tier. 

A Darkwing Duck Episode A MOnth: This one has also been promoted every time I could and still stands. If you like that mind behind the shadow disguise, that daring duck of mystery, that champion of right, then you’ll get one review a month about him, as voted on by you patreons. 

Danny Phantom: The Ultimate Enemy: And since neither of these have helped me so far and stepping back into Amity Park made me realize how much I love the series, even if it’s creator is a 80 tons of smug asshole packed into a t-shirt he thinks is cooler than it is. So it only felt right to add  the ghost boy to the tier and the best way to kick that off is with it’s second best, and only barely second behind Reign Storm, episode: The Ultimate Enemy! Danny finds his future is imperfect and must battle his own evil self! If you want my thoughts on one of the series finest hours, then help me hit 20 bucks a month to keep making content. 

25 Dollar Tier: 

I removed the Tail Spin content, though rest assured I will be covering Plunder and Lightning sometime this year. But what I replaced it with is even better. 

One Danny Phantom Review a Month: YOu like teen superheros? you like ghosts? you like me slagigng off about butch hartman and trying to make it crystal clear his creation dosen’t wholly belong to him? Then you’ll like me reviewing Danny Phantom. And while i’m already doing that, this goal gaurantees one episode a month, and said episode will be voted on by my patreons. So if you pay for this you’ll not only get your monthly dose of going ghost.. but you’ll get a chance to PICK what it is. 

Disney Shows To Movies Trilogy : I’ve decided to make it a tradition for my 15 dollar stretch goals to do a bunch of disney movies. And like with my last batch, which you’ll be seeing in may, i’m doing tv shows that got their own movies, theatrical or otherwise. And this time we’re doing MY generatoin: Kim Possible: So The Drama, the best story in the show’s histroy and the best movie in the Disney Channels! Recess: Schools Out! The suprisingly bonkers unsurprisingly awesome finale to an awesome show! and The Proud Family Movie, another UTTERLY BATSHIT finish to a great show.  Lost at Sea and Seconds: This one’s for my scottaholics, fourth part of my Scott Pilgrim retrospective coming this week!. If you like me taking a look at Scott’s quest to punch the fuck out of his girlfriends exes while growing up a little, then if you help me get to the 30 dollar tier, i’ll also take a look at O’Malley’s other graphic novels Lost at Sea, which follows a girl who lost her soul and her boyfriend on a trip with what may be Young Neil’s older sister, and Seconds, the story of a woman with issues growing up who finds the ablitlity to travel through time.. or is it space? And some of you savvier readers my know he has nother comic. Where’s that one? wellllll

30 Dollar Tier:

Snotgirl: I’m saving this one for this tier. Reviews of each collected volume of snotgirl, Bryan’s first ongoing series, all three so far and any more to come about, unsuprisingly, a  hot mess of a person, this time who might’ve done a murder. You know instead of defintely did a murder but in self defnese and with a longsword. 

Gravity Falls Season 1!: One of Disney’s finest finally on this blog. All season 1 episodes reviewed in some way in some shape in some form.  Star Vs Finale Arc!: You’ve heard me bitch about the problems in Tom’s story, and wil lcontinue to. Now see the terrible way everyone elses ends! From an amazing build up to an awful finish, see reviews of Every story relevant season 4 episode from Butterfly Follies to Cleaved that won’t already be covered in my tom retrospective. It’s a road to crushing disapointment, come on inside! 

35 Dollar Tier:  More Disney TV Adaptations!: Doug’s First Movie! See Doug get really fucking weird in his sea monster based movie with a punch line of a name! Teachers Pet, a great movie out of a show I barely saw! Kim Possible Live action! it’s suprisingly okay! and Recess Taking the Fifth: a compliation movie for a season we sadly never got. 

Gravity Falls Season 2: Buillding on the first reward Gravity Falls Reviews will go beyond the first season and finish the job. From zombies, to dipcifica, to ford to weirdmageddon, I’m doin it all. 

40 Dollar Tier: 

Two HUGE Disney Focused Comics Retrospectives! 

Darkwing Duck: In addition to the show, i’ll start reviewing the awesome follow up comic that got me into it. From the start to both finishes: the unathorized crossover finale and the sadly short lived sequel series from joe books, the worst mistake disney ever made that wasn’t racist, before Artemis Fowl said hold my beer. Also the short lived Ducktlaes series because why not. 

The Incredibles!: The Family Dynamic! A comprehensive retrospective featuring reviews of the movie, the Mark Waid followup, the sequel that ignores said followup and the incomparable Christos Gage’s followup to THAT movie. Also that wonderfuly awful failed tv pilot bob made that he and lucius did a mst3k of. 

45 Dollar Tier: 

Disney Flims Lilo and Stitch a Thon: All four lilo and stitch movies, Lilo and Stitch, Lilo and Sitch 2, Stitch and Leroy and Stitch! All the hawaii, aliens and sequels you can handle!

Amphibia Season 1: I’ve done Season 2 as it comes out, i’ll be doing the same for season 3, so help me get here to see the start at least once a month, but two at a time!

50 Dollar Tier: The last one for now. I’ll probably go to 10 dollar tiers after this. 

The Owl House Season 1: While I wait for the second season to start so I can cover it, have me do the rest of season 1! The only exceptions are the already covered Enchanted Grom Fright and the earmarked for pride month wing it like witches!

The Two Loves and 87 Mistakes of Mordecai: A regular show romancetrospective, as we go through the downs, ups, higher ups and crushing lows of Modercai’s romantic arcs from regular show. His crush on margert, making his move, moving on, moving on to cj, and then the horrible cluster fuck I’ve talked about nonstop and will again and again as one of the worst romantic arcs in memory as they shot the relationship in the foot head and groin! Force me to relive it all!

So yeah I’ll add more tiers, again probably 10 dollars apart if I get to 50, but given I barely got to 15 i’m not optimistic. PROVE ME WRONG. HELP ME HIT 50. 

Other Stuff:

Finally outisde of Patreon, that was the main reason for this, I have news on my various arcs. For one thing i’ll be trying to keep the pace better, so expect at least one entry a month for ones i’m doing on my own time like the tom retrospective, life and times and Scott pilgrims. Ones kev does will be done weekly to keep my wallet afloat. 

I also have two more retrospectives incoming! The first is paid for by Kev: I’l lbe tackling ALL THREE SEASON 2 ARCS OF DUCKTALES 2017. After the headache of trying to cram the della arc into three weeks to keep up with the lena one, I decided i’td be better for pacing if I did all three at once and kev agreed to it, if using his patreon reviews to cushion the blows. So starting next month i’ll be covering the Louie, Della and Glomgold/Owlson arcs, swapping between them in episode order. With that I should be FAR closer to having covered every ducktales episode. Granted i’ll still have 17 to cover, but it’ll make that much more managable. 

The second comes in June specifically timed for Pride Month. With Scott Pilgrim Wrapping up in August just in time for the movie’s anniversary, I decided to start covering another one of my faviorite comics of all time. It’s time to transform, roll out and make this precoius it’s Transformers More than Meets the Eye! For those of you unfamiliar it’s an idw comic that follows a rag tag group of transformers, about half of them gay or gay coded, on a mission to find the lost knights of cybertron and bring ballance to a post war cybertron.. which quickly devloves into hyjinnks with a side order of heartrending deaths and charcter development... and references to dexy’s midnight runners. 

So that’s all for now. thank you for reading, please support my patreon as the next pay term is at the start of next month, so if you want me to start on any of those stretch goals, nows the time. Please help me earn a living and until all are one, i’ll see you at the next rainbow. 

[twdmusicboxmystery]

Beth/Eugene Entanglement Part 5 — Miscellaneous

Okay, so I should have posted this like a month ago. I found it buried in my drafts. For now, it’s kind of be a catch-all for things @wdway has found but I haven’t posted yet. I doubt this will be the last Eugene/Beth post, but it’s the last of what I have right now. Prior to S11. Just know that this isn’t one cohesive theory, but rather random bits and pieces. Maybe it will spark something for someone who reads it. Here we go.

Symbol Shift from FG to Eugene:

@wdway:

Father Gabriel has been a Sirius radio communication symbol, which is a symbol of two of our three monkeys, hearing and speaking (hear no evil, speak no evil) and has been since s8e11 Dead or Alive Or. This thought occurred to me after seeing so much of Eugene on the radio, especially with Stephanie. It's basically been his theme for this season. At some point, I realized that the more we have seen Eugene in this situation, the less we have seen FG with the radio.

Let's take a look at the first time we see the symbols around FG from Dead or Alive Or. His infected, bloodshot eyes, the radio (hearing, speaking). There’s a phoenix in this scene as well. 

In s9e, Who Are You Now? We see that they must have gone back to the Radio Shack and brought the equipment to AZ. The room is filled with symbols the radio, the pink clay pig that has held keys to a vehicle is mysteriously back together on the table, so they have moved the symbols to AZ and FG is the prime radio operator. This episode also is where we really see Eugene start to become a Beth symbol with a braided hair and his mission to help Rosita put up the radio antenna on the white water tower, which results in him getting a leg injury so very reminiscent of Beth in Alone.

This season in e1, Lines We Cross, is the beginning of the major shift of connecting the radio to Eugene rather than FG. There are two short scenes of FG transmitting on the radio and that's the last time we actually see him. We hear him occasionally, but we no longer see him with the radio.

This is the episode that made me realize the shift because after we see the satellite falling, Eugene runs to radio Oceanside. We have the shift.

We have a great shot of Eugene and the Phoenix. The camera circles around and there is a prominent shot of the bright light along with the radio and Eugene. (Bright light focusing on someone is the equivalent to tree and trunks for @frangipanilove​) The light is a huge symbol of Beth to me because of all the focus lights that were around her at Grady.

The rest of the season mostly when we see Eugene, he is at his radio station at Hilltop, speaking primarily to Stephanie. He is the new radio communicator. He represents hearing and speaking symbols which leaves FG as our Sirius seeing symbol.

Pearl/Pearl Harbor stuff

*Quick note: the three of us have discussed Pearl Harbor as a military symbol and also a water/aquatic symbol in deep detail long before this post. But I couldn’t find our previous discussions without scrolling back through months and months of messages. So if it sounds like we’re referring to earlier conversations, we are. ;D*

Eugene in the attic at Hilltop, working on the radio equipment. He's talking to Rosita when there is a spark and he says "Mother of Pearl." We talked about this just the other day when we were discussing pearls in song lyrics and I noted that Pearl Harbor is one of the most famous military bases in the world, which could make this a military reference. And of course, @Frangi, you have a ton of things from you've searched about pearls. Bottom line: this is a water reference.

Biblical References:

Yesterday, I had an epiphany that is also a biblical reference. At least the word pearl. And I cannot believe that we haven't thought about this before. This is from the King James version.

Matthew 7:6, “Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your peals before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you.”

Some very key words here. It mentions dogs, pearls, swine, which is another word for pigs, trample them under their feet. The word “them” has been used to refer to walkers many times, under their feet, pigs feet.

Another take on it I want to share with you is when Eugene says, "Mother of pearl," he is upset because the radio sparked, it felt somewhat like a curse which made me think of his mentor Abraham always using the term "Son of a Dick." So that gives a female reference, the other a male reference.

Later in the episode, Eugene is trying to contact Rosita, and she doesn't answer because she's sick and at the clinic, so he puts out a general call. Anyone out there? Greetings, this is Tater bug calling live over open channels. Anyone out there? Give us a copy.

I think most people like myself feel that it was a call back to Aaron in the episode Them. I feel strongly that's how it's intended to be interpreted, especially with what happened in the dialogue that is used towards the end of the conversation, which I'll get to later.

Here is what Aaron said when first approaching Maggie and Sasha. "Hey, I didn't mean to interrupt. Good morning. My name is Aaron. Oh, I know, stranger danger, but I am a friend. I would like to talk to the person in charge. Rick, right? I have good news."

Now for the bible, again from King James, Luke 2:10, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people.” I won't spend any more time on the parallels between the two I think they're pretty obvious.

Eugene later, "This is Tater bug over open-air, surfing on proverbial radio waves. Any interested ear holes? Come back." He changes channels. "Anyone, anywhere, this is Tater bug." This time he gets a reply from Stephanie. "Hello Tater bug, I'm receiving you loud and clear, are you really out there?"

Very interesting and, for us, at least, obvious. Ear holes is a reference to ears, calling out for anyone, anywhere. He uses a bible reference by using the word, proverbial. Words like radio waves, radio = Sirius, waves = water. Waves could also mean to make waves, upsetting the establishment and then we have Stephanie coming back with her response of surprise and the question, are you really out there? A shock at finding someone out there.

@twdmusicboxmystery: Just breaking in to also point out that the song at the end of Still, Up the Wolves, talked about air waves as well. Just saying. ;D

Suspicious Dialogue:

@wdway: I'm going to go through a bit more of the strange dialogue. I don't think this is any huge sign pointing to Eugene's storyline as much as they're using him to throw out phrases and words, sometimes that have multiple meanings or give pause to what they might want to point at. A reminder that this dialogue is from the episode Bond. I will not rehash the entire saying, just pick out something phrases.

Eugene talking on the radio to Stephanie, talking about growing up and visiting Pennsylvania. "Locomotives were my jam." Here, the word jam has multiple meanings. The first and what I believe is intended here is that trains, locomotives were his special, happy hobby, something he loved that he could really get into.

The word jam can also refer to being in trouble, a situation that you want to get out of. It is exactly how episode 16 ended with Eugene and company in a jam.

@twdmusicboxmystery: Also, in Alone, Daryl ate *jam*! ;D

@wdway: This next one for some reason just nagged at me and I kept going back to the sentence until it hit me why it seems odd. "My parents purchased a pair of tickets to the 1995 train Fair Expo."

Well, the thing that kept nagging at me is that unless definitions have changed, the word pair refers to 2 and if his parents (both since there is an "s" on the end) purchased a pair of tickets then they're one ticket short. It's a little thing, but I felt like what they were going for was the word pair or two. Which sent me down the rabbit hole.

In the series, there are lots of 2's. Some are more obvious than others. There are several pairs of couples in the series, for example: Rick and Michonne, Maggie and Glenn, Sasha and Abraham. These are the easy ones, but we see tons of instances of the numbers 2 and 22.

Moving on to the next weird dialogue phrase. Eugene talks about the black raspberry ice cream I discussed that last week. It's the name of the ice cream parlor that I want to talk about it's called The Inside Scoop. That’s a reference to a large spoon/ladle. The Big Dipper, with the North Star at its end.

It occurred to me that that's a really odd name for an ice cream parlor. Then I realized the writers might be having a little fun here. The inside scoop can refer to newspaper or some form of media getting the jump on a story, getting the inside goods. I thought of all the times that the spoiler site had the inside scoop on what was going on in a TWD episode. When this episode was written, they were still up and running. I also like to think it could be a nod to TD.

Now we come to the second Aaron dialogue reminder. Eugene wants to continue his and Stephanie's radio conversation. She says, "you could be a threat." Eugene volunteers to share information. Stephanie replies that she could be the threat to him. After thinking this over, Eugene says, "I have a twinge in my belly that says that you lean toward the good column of the alignment. I do know you." He then gives her his real name and asked if they can continue to talk.

Forget, s5e13. Aaron to Daryl: "The main reason why I want you to help me recruit is because you do know the difference between a good person and a bad person." Eugene wants to believe that Stephanie is a good person because of their conversations. And since he survived by reading the people around him, he probably is a decent judge of people.

I was pretty much done with this. Then I thought I should check out Morningstar. I had felt that I had pretty well covered that in previous messages, but lo-and-behold, I found a couple things that I feel are worth mentioning.

Near the beginning of the episode, when Eugene and Stephanie realize they are not that far apart, and talk of a possibility of meeting, Eugene said, "I can't help but believe that this is a celestially ordained meet and greet."

My first thought was Aaron and his meet and greet with Maggie and Sasha. And then I thought "celestially ordained," is very biblical sounding. It points to Beth being a Christ figure and we're waiting for her Resurrection.

This next one I really loved. Later on, right after Eugene stops singing, Stephanie finishes the song. Eugene tells her she "has great chops, singing chops that is." A singing reference. Stephanie says to Eugene, "I'm sorry for disappearing."

Oh, my Bethyl heart! My mind went straight to Alone when Beth called out the last words she ever spoke to Daryl, "I won't leave you!" Then she disappeared. She was just gone. I have this head canon that this is absolutely something Beth will someday say to Daryl.

It also seemed odd for Stephanie to use the word "disappearing," which to me is a physical act of leaving, taking your person, your body away. Stephanie stopped talking to Eugene. She went silent. She obviously did not disappear because she heard him singing. She was still present.

The last dialogue is from A Certain Doom. After the bike accident, the group is trying to get Eugene to continue. He is sad and frustrated that they have lost too much time and it will be pointless. Eugene says, "unless it involves slowing the passage of time." How could we not possibly think of....

Here's one that occurred to me not too long after I had talked about Daryl's I Never game. His statement of "I never got anything from Santa Claus." The one that always breaks all our hearts and the hope that getting Beth back will be the ultimate Christmas gift. In reviewing the episodes with Eugene, and especially spending quite a bit of time on the episode Morning Star, the light bulb came on and I finally saw the obvious.

Santa Claus is a figure with a pure heart that gives gifts to children. Daryl is no longer a child, at least not a physical child, although at times he can pretty much be a big kid, haha. So, it's only fitting that his Santa Claus gift actually comes from a child with a brave but innocent heart. (Judith)

I think this truly fits. It's not a new piece of clothing, but it's a renewed one. It has been resurrected. His angel wings repaired with Christmas Stars on blue. I love this idea and hope you guys do too.

TwdMusicBoxMystery:

Okay, special thanks to @wdway​ for digging up all these clues and putting them together for us! I wouldn’t have had the time to go through all the episodes she did, so I’m very grateful that she’s willing to share her findings.

As I said at the beginning, this is far from the last thing you’ll hear about Eugene. I reserve the right to do more posts in the future. :D Thoughts?

[myheartrevealedocs]

Untouchable- Ch 1: Jenna Borge

Summary: A Spencer Reid x OC fanfic that retells select episodes, starting in season 1, from the point of view of Lydia Ambers, a forensic scientist.

Warnings: swearing, murder

Ch 2 | About Lydia

~ ~ ~

Waking up in a hospital was not Lydia’s idea of a good time.

Not as a broke college student. And especially not when she had no recollection of injuring herself. In fact, she couldn’t even remember falling asleep. It was like she had blinked and found herself horizontal… Not great.

She tried to pull herself together enough to figure out what was wrong. Other than her head being fuzzy, she couldn’t seem to find any injuries on herself. Perhaps she’d passed out? But if that were the case, Jenna would have given her some water and put her to bed. What would warrant a trip to the hospital?

“Lydia Ambers?” A woman asked, pulling her attention to the door. “My name is Detective Richards. I have a few questions for you.”

Oh shit… 

~ ~ ~

“Last night, in Santa Cruz, California, college student Jenna Borge was stabbed multiple times in her dorm room. Her roommate, Lydia Ambers, was sedated with antipsychotics, but otherwise unharmed.”

“So, it’s personal,” Morgan inferred.

“You would think that,” JJ agreed. “Only, this doesn’t look to be his first kill. Two months ago, a recent graduate from UC Santa Cruz, Elizabeth Chang, was stabbed and killed while walking home from work. Six months before that, Lucy Max was found in an alleyway. The first two girls were assumed to have been victims of muggings, but now with Jenna’s death, the Santa Cruz PD are thinking it’s a serial killer.”

“Any connection between the victims?” Elle asked, but JJ shook her head.

“Nothing but age and gender. These girls were of different races, social standings, and Lucy was a college student at a different school than Elizabeth and Jenna. It’s highly unlikely that these girls have any friends in common.”

“Why leave the roommate alive then?” It was Reid this time, looking through the information on his file. “If our unsub has no preference for the girls he picks, why not kill her too? And the fact that he had the tranquilizer handy means he knew she would be there and had planned ahead of time not to kill her.”

“So, our unsub has some sort of connection with these girls. He’s killing these girls for a reason. The question is, what reason?” Gideon finished, standing up to leave. “Let’s go to California.”

~ ~ ~

“I need you to tell me everything you remember,” Detective Richards said, sitting beside Lydia’s bed.

“What’s going on?” Lydia demanded. “Why am I here?”

“I really need to know what you know before I tell you anything,” the woman explained, unhelpfully.

“I don’t know anything! I swear, the last thing I remember was studying in my room.”

“Was your roommate there?”

Lydia huffed. She didn’t get it. Something was going on, something bad, likely having to do with the fact that she ended up in a hospital with no apparent injuries. And the only person who knew was being passive and dodging her questions.

The last time she’d had to deal with the police like this, they’d been as blunt as a hammer. Sixteen-year-old Lydia had no clue what was coming and they swept the rug out from underneath her. She had felt like she was drowning, being asked a thousand questions before their words could sink in.

Somehow, Detective Richards was worse.

“Yes. My roommate was trying to sleep.”

“And was there anyone else in the room with you?”

Lydia did all she could to keep from scratching her own eyes out. “No.”

“Are you sure? This is vital information, Miss Ambers. We need to know everyone who came in and out of your room yesterday.”

“I’m not lying,” she insisted. “Only Jenna and I were in our room. Now please, tell me what happened!”

The detective hesitated a moment. Lydia’s heart leapt into her throat, the suspense finally catching up to her. Perhaps a realization, too. For some reason, she could see where this was going.

“Last night, someone came into your room and murdered your roommate, Jenna Borge.”

The denial struck first. “That doesn’t make any sense. Jenna was right next to me. I would’ve… No one was there but us.”

“You two were found by a classmate of Jenna’s. She thought you both were dead, but when the police arrived on scene, they realized that you had been knocked out, but were still breathing. The doctor can talk to you about that more than I can. Whoever killed your roommate drugged you first, to stop you from doing anything.”

And then, as always… the anger.

“Leave.”

~ ~ ~

Jenna was gone. Really gone. Lydia had tried calling her phone multiple times, but stopped herself when she realized that listening to Jenna’s voice was only fueling her anger.

It felt as if storms raged in Lydia’s stomach. If the universe was really out to get her, why did it never come for her directly?

She shed her tears quickly that night, knowing that her hospital room might be the only place for her to safely do so. Once she left, she couldn’t disappear. People would want to talk to her about it. She’d have to go back to class. And there really wasn’t any way of processing something like this except moving on.

“Drink a lot of water,” the nurse explained to Lydia, as she escorted her out of the hospital the next morning. “You’ll likely be lethargic for the next few days, so go easy on yourself. Take a day off or ask your teachers to be gentle with your workload.”

“Thank you,” she responded, shortly. “I’ll be fine.”

“Lydia Ambers?”

Lydia groaned. Another cop? Really?

The man who had called to her stood in the waiting room of the hospital. He pulled out a badge, though he was still too far away for her to see. His partner, a far younger, taller man, was raking his eyes over her, as if looking for something.

Lydia left her escort and walked over to the two of them, arms crossed over her chest. “Yes?”

“My name is Agent Gideon, this is Dr. Reid. We’re from the FBI.”

She raised an eyebrow, not intending to be challenging, but she couldn’t help it. Lydia had never been great at calming herself down, despite all the opportunities to practice. “Whoopie for you. I explained to Detective Richards what happened that night. I honestly don’t remember anything. If you’re here to take me in as a suspect, go ahead, but if not, there’s nothing I can do for you.”

“Miss Ambers, we work for the Behavioral Analysis Unit. We’re not questioning you as a suspect, but we believe the man who attacked your roommate might have known her before he killed her. You might have known him as well. Do you think you could come back to the station with us and sit through a few more questions?”

No, I can’t. The emotional strength it takes to pretend like I’m okay is too much for me. Another hour of questioning and I guarantee my head will explode, I’ll vomit what little is left in my stomach and then my own intestines, and I’ll assault a police officer… In that order.

“Don’t call me Miss Ambers,” she insisted, ignoring the violent monologue replaying in her head. “Lydia is fine. But yes, I’ll come along.”

Agent Gideon nodded and Lydia could see an understanding in his eyes. But she pushed it aside as simply his experience in dealing with grieving strangers.

He led her and Dr. Reid out of the hospital and to a black SUV. As they walked, Dr. Reid fell slightly behind Lydia, which she knew couldn’t be an accident considering his insanely long legs. And even if she didn’t know that, his gaze was burning holes into her side.

“Are you sure I’m not a suspect?”

“Do you think you should be?” Agent Gideon asked.

“No, but Dr. Reid here is staring at me like I might pull a gun on him any minute.”

The guy looked startled that she had even acknowledged him, glancing at Gideon like he needed permission to speak to her. “Um, I was trying to identify the source of your limp. Your hip and knee don’t jerk when you walk and you seem to be able to extend them fully, but you clearly favor your left leg.”

Lydia rolled her eyes. Normally the question was phrased as ‘What’s wrong with your leg?’ She had to admit, she appreciated his forwardness about staring, but it didn’t make her want to answer any more.

“Well, don’t worry Dr. Reid. My medical records will reflect the fact that I have had this for 5 years and it doesn’t affect the case. Thank you for the concern, though.” And with that, she slid into the backseat and shut the door.

He looked at Gideon, confused. “I wasn’t asking because I’m-”

“That means don’t talk about it, Reid,” Gideon told him, before he also got into the car and turned on the engine.

~ ~ ~

“How long had you known Jenna?” Gideon started, having Lydia sit down in an empty room in the station. Reid continued his hovering in the back, completely silent.

“Since we were freshmen… We were going to graduate together next month.”

Saying those words aloud was harder for Lydia than she thought. Her nose started to burn, a sign that tears were on the way, but she set her face with a look of determination. Jenna wasn’t going to graduate. That was a fact now. She couldn’t do anything about that.

“Are you alright, Mi- Lydia?”

She scoffed. “I’m sorry?” she asked, thrown completely off guard. “Should I be?? My friend was just…” The words died in her throat.

“I’m sorry.” Agent Gideon’s tone was completely sincere, but he continued mercilessly. “You’re not displaying some of the typical signs of grief-”

She laughed, dryly. “You analyze behavior and you don’t know that people handle their grief differently?”

“Of course I do. And yours indicates guilt. Perhaps some past trauma you’re trying to repress-”

“You said I wasn’t a suspect-”

“And you’re not-”

“Then stop profiling me!” She smashed her fist against the table and the sudden sting against her hand brought her back to reality. Don’t make this harder. Getting angry at the police only made both sides more frustrated, it wouldn’t compel anyone to find out who did this faster. She gritted her teeth to continue. “Yes, I feel guilty. I let someone sedate me and kill my roommate. And I just don’t understand why he didn’t kill me! Everything else: my anger issues, my past, my fucking leg, it doesn’t pertain to this case. So, please, just let me be.”

“I’m sorry that I’ve upset you.”

That was a shift from what she was used to. When she was younger, it was always the same routine. She’d lash out and the rest of the world would send her away until she calmed down. And she knew that it was her fault. That they didn’t deserve her rage. But she never realized how nice it might be to have someone stop her then and there. And take the blame away from her fury, if only for a moment.

“You didn’t upset me. Agent Gideon, I’m sure you’ve dealt with worse characters than me… at least I hope you have. Just know that I’m doing my best… if there was more to say, I would have told you. If it was going to help, I’d tell you every detail of my past, but it isn’t.”

He seemed to agree with that. Maybe he wasn’t so bad.

“Now then… what else do you want to know?”

~ ~ ~

“Notice anything?” Gideon inquired as the two of them left Lydia, exiting the room she was held in and joining the team in a separate part of the station.

“Yeah? She’s like a walking contradiction. She claims anger issues, but she shows no signs of stress. She makes snappy remarks, but physically she seemed anxious, not angry. Her face is relaxed and her shoulders hold all her tension, not her hands or jaw.”

Gideon nodded, listening closely to the boy’s observations. “What do you make of the fact that she keeps asking if she’s a suspect?”

“Nerves? Guilty conscious? Maybe she’s afraid we’ll find something and she wants to make sure we aren’t looking into her.”

“Good. She doesn’t want to be profiled, that usually indicates that she’s hiding something. But, it always comes back to her past, one she claims Jenna had no part of. So… she’s got a bad history, but it’s unrelated to the case.”

“And for some reason it’s taking priority in her mind, instead of Jenna’s death,” Reid concluded.

“You talking about the roommate?” Hotch asked as they approached.

“Yes,” Gideon explained. “She’s an interesting one. A challenge.”

“Do you think she’s involved?”

Gideon shook his head. “If her medical report wasn’t alibi enough, she shows no signs of being a psychopath. Or a sociopath, for that matter. But she’s hard to profile. She’s got a complicated past, no doubt.”

Morgan laughed upon hearing this. “There’s someone Gideon and Reid can’t profile?”

Reid tried to defend the two of them almost immediately. “It’s almost like she uses her generic differences to hide from the bigger ones. Like, she kept saying she had anger issues, and while that added up with her reactions, clearly they stem from something very particular in her life and she’s trying to pretend like that’s not there. Or something…”

Morgan looked him up and down, noticing Reid’s hesitance in his words: almost, like, something… “She’s got you all confused, Reid. I’ve got to meet this chick.”

“You can,” JJ said, walking into the room with Lydia in tow. “She’s still here.”

The whole room looked up as the new girl strode in. Spencer watched her closely, but for some reason, all his suspicions about her had dissolved after meeting her in the hospital. He tried to be unbiased, but he had something of a gut feeling about her. An inexplicable trust that this act of hers was reasonable.

Lydia’s hair was dark, the ends brushing her shoulders as she walked. She looked nervous, approaching the room of profilers, but her voice was completely steady as she spoke.

“I want to offer more assistance. Better assistance than talking about Jenna’s past boyfriends… I just finished an internship recently with the SCPD. I’m a chemistry student, on track to becoming a forensic scientist. I know I’m not anywhere near as qualified as you are, but I’m far more familiar with the crime scene. At the very least, let me point out anything suspicious. Before you guys clear it out, that is.”

Hotch sucked in his lips, hesitantly, before approaching. “Miss-”

“Lydia,” she and Gideon said simultaneously. She glanced at the older man with an unreadable expression.

“Lydia,” Hotch corrected. “I’m Agent Hotchner. What you’re asking to do is difficult. You’ve seen how some of these crime scenes turn out. It’s messy. We can’t guarantee you’re psychologically ready to see what’s there.”

“I won’t be a burden,” she insisted. “You can have surveillance over me the whole time. But I’m positive I can help.”

“Let her do it,” Gideon chimed in. “I’ll keep an eye on her.”

Hotch was clearly not convinced on the matter, but he nodded. “Reid and Morgan, go along.”

Derek approached, reaching his hand out to shake. “I’m Agent Morgan.”

“Lydia,” she introduced, her demeanor calmer now that Hotch had agreed. “Thank you,” she told the unit chief and left briskly.

“She’s definitely guarded,” Morgan admitted. “She must be hiding a big heart underneath that mask. That or she has ulterior motives to go to the crime scene.”

~ ~ ~

Don’t touch anything.

She almost ran the minute the door opened. It had been a day and a half and the room still smelled with an iron-y sharpness.

If you start to cry, or feel sick, just go. Don’t stop to explain yourself.

Every time she looked at the bed, the words ‘that’s not hers’ flashed in front of her eyes. That dark red stain… that’s not hers. And the light red droplets by the door… that’s not hers.

If you can’t handle it, leave.

Wait… that’s not hers...

“Did you guys test this blood?”

Morgan’s face read with clear confusion. “Why do you ask?”

Lydia’s eyes glanced between the bed and the few spots on the floor. “You said he tied her to the bed before stabbing her. Then, how did these get here? It’s not like he or the knife was dripping with her blood, or else there’d be more evidence of it around the room. Not to mention, he had to walk out of the room and down the hall without raising suspicions. So, it’s unlikely there was enough blood on him or the knife to drip on the floor over here. However, if he’d accidentally been cut, he’d be quick to cover it. Probably didn’t notice any evidence hit the floor. That’s why there’s some here, far away from the body, but not trailing to or from it.”

“Very clever,” Gideon acknowledged. “We actually did have that blood tested. It wasn’t your roommates.”

She nodded, but didn’t seem all that happy to hear she was right. Reid had taken notice that the whole time she was explaining her theory, she never called her roommate by her name. She was distancing herself, which was probably good at the moment, but he wondered what she could be thinking about.

“She struggled,” Lydia continued, looking at the disheveled blankets and items which had fallen from her desk. “That’s good… I need to look in these drawers.”

“I don’t know-” Morgan started, but Gideon was already pulling a pair of gloves out of his pocket. 

“Put these on first.”

The younger man was clearly not happy about it, but didn’t say anything, instead glancing at Reid, who looked on curiously. Both him and Gideon wanted to know what Lydia might find.

Once her blue surgical gloves were on, she opened up the drawers to Jenna’s desk. Nothing looked weird. A little scattered, but it reflected Jenna quite well. She was just beginning to think the unsub hadn’t touched anything when a thought crossed her mind.

“Where’s her jewelry?”

“We didn’t find any,” Morgan explained and Lydia shook her head.

“That doesn’t make sense. Jenna-” she caught herself, voice catching only for a moment. “...She always wore necklaces. She kept them in this drawer, because she didn’t like to leave expensive items out. She’d even hide them underneath all of the clutter in the hopes that a thief or burglar wouldn’t search all the way down for them. But they aren’t here. None of them are.”

“That doesn’t add up,” Morgan argued. “We didn’t profile this guy as a robber. Why’s he suddenly stealing expensive jewelry from his victims?”

Lydia shrugged and held up a wallet. “Not for the money. This is still full of cash.”

“The necklaces are a trophy for our unsub,” Gideon reasoned. “We’ve seen weirder.”

She nodded. “Her desk is always this disheveled. He could have searched them, I wouldn’t be able to tell the difference.”

“Anything else seem odd to you?” Gideon asked, noticing a decline in her energy.

She bit down on her bottom lip. Her eyes scanned every corner of the room, zipping over the bed quickly. “Nothing.”

Reid paused, the wheels in his head turning. “We should check pawn shops nearby and see if any of Jenna’s jewelry ended up there. We can try to trace it back to him.”

Gideon agreed. “You two get on that. Lydia, can you come back to the station with me to look over a suspect list?”

She nodded, slowly.

~ ~ ~ 

“No… No… No… No… ”

Lydia was worried she had hit her limit. Any motivation to help was slowly seeping out of her and a need to scream was replacing it. She’d never seen these guys before. Never heard their names. The most she was able to do at the crime scene was tell them about the necklaces and then a bunch of stuff they already knew. The helpless feeling was taking over once more.

“Gideon.” JJ grabbed his attention as she walked in with a cup of coffee. She set it down next to him, then glanced at Lydia. “Can I possibly get you anything?”

Lydia shook her head. “No… I’m fine. I just-” Something compelled her to go out on a limb. “JJ? Do you know if Jenna had any jewelry on her when she died?”

The blonde woman paused. “No. I can go check the record?”

“Please,” Lydia mumbled.

As she walked off, Gideon raised an eyebrow at her. “You think the unsub might have left a necklace on her person?”

Lydia just dropped her head into her hands. “I don’t know,” she huffed. “Looking at these random men isn’t helping. It’s the only lead I’ve got so just… go with me here.”

They waited a moment for JJ to come back in. “She wasn’t wearing any jewelry, but it looks like they found a broken necklace in her pocket.”

Lydia’s ears perked up. “May I see it?”

“I’ve got a picture?” JJ offered.

“Yes. That’d be great.”

Once again, she was gone and Gideon was more invested by the minute. “Broken necklace. That’s interesting. Perhaps he left it behind because it was broken?”

“Maybe he ripped it off her,” Lydia fired back.

“Here you are.” JJ dropped a picture of a beautiful gold chain with a small pink jewel attached to it. And Lydia finally felt some relief.

“What is it?” Gideon asked.

“This isn’t Jenna’s necklace.”

~ ~ ~

“Lydia believes that part of our unsub’s ritual is taking his victim’s necklaces and leaving them on the next one. Lucy Max didn’t have any jewelry on her when we found her, but Elizabeth Chang had a broken necklace in her pocket, which we can’t identify as belonging to her and Lydia claims the one in Jenna’s pocket wasn’t hers either. And since he took all of Jenna’s necklaces, it looks like he plans to drop one on the following victim as well.”

Hotch shook his head. “That’s a lot of faith to put in a random college student. This could very easily have been placed.”

“I trust Lydia,” Gideon declared. “You should have seen her on the scene, Hotch. She’s a natural at this.”

“Yeah. Maybe she’s been studying up on you. We’ve seen that before. You said you could barely figure this girl out, how do we know she’s not manipulating our case?”

“She’s not,” Gideon insisted once more. “Listen, I’ll strike you a deal. Look into this. For me. We think this guy gets his high off of leaving hints as to who he is. Start with anything that might have significance to a necklace. If I’m wrong, I’ll do all the paperwork for the next 3 cases.”

“And if you’re right?” Hotch asked, not sure why he was even considering a deal now. But he was curious. And Gideon seemed set on the idea.

“If I’m right, you have to offer Lydia a job.”

~ ~ ~

Lydia woke up once again without any recollection of having fallen asleep. This time, however, she wasn’t in a hospital bed, which was a relief.

She found herself on a couch. In the police station. She sat up, worried about how long she must have been there, but no one had kicked her out yet. So… hopefully not long?

That’s when she identified the sound that had awoken her. A soft knocking came from the doorframe of the room she was in. She whipped around to find an exhausted Agent Gideon waiting for her attention.

“Sorry to disturb you Lydia, but we’re headed back to the jet, so you’ve got to leave the station.”

“Back to the jet?” She jumped from the couch. “Did you find him?”

“Yes… You were right.”

Lydia wanted to say something but found herself tripping over her own tongue. It felt as if a wave was crashing into her back. She was being pushed forward, away from the distraction of finding who did this to Jenna and instead down into the ocean

Grief was a bitch.

“I… I was right?” she asked.

Gideon started to explain the man they caught to her. Jonathan Carrey. She heard the key words as he said them: necklaces, pawn shops, mother, college girls, confession. But none of them formulated the actual accomplishment Lydia had been waiting for.

“Oh…”

She couldn’t react. Not anymore. All her energy was wasted. She was free from the strong compulsion to find out what had happened to Jenna and left with determination stats in the negatives.

“Lydia, do you have somewhere to go for now?”

She nodded.

“Okay… get some rest. You did good today.”

She felt like she was going to be sick. You did good…

She’s still dead.

And after some hesitance, Agent Gideon was gone.

Lydia picked up her phone, calling a friend to see if she could stay for a few nights.

Process. Cry. Move on. Rest.

She really needed that right now.

“Hey,” a soft voice called as she hung up the phone. This time, it was the strangely silent Dr. Reid who was watching her.

He sort of peaked in and waited for a response or invitation. After she didn’t give him any, just a blank, detached stare, he came in on his own terms

“Uh, I thought you might…” he drifted off, judging her expression before continuing. “I thought you might want these.”

He held open his hand to show her a small, knotted collection of necklaces.

“We recovered them from Jonathan Carrey’s shop. I was considering giving them to Jenna’s parents, but when we spoke to them, they didn’t seem to know as much about Jenna’s jewelry collection as you. So, I figured you’d appreciate them more.”

Lydia took them from him slowly, wrapping the chains around her fingers. Unexpectedly, a few tears slipped down her cheeks, but Lydia let them fall. She deserved it.

“Thank you, Dr. Reid.”

It was peculiar, but as he left, a single thought ran through his head:

With everything Lydia had been through, that was the first time he’d heard a tremble in her voice.

[pluviophile-bookworm]

High School Musical: The Musical: The Series: The Rewatch pt.3

Ok, full disclosure: I should not be doing this right now. But I've been thinking about it since yesterday and, well, I reckon I can go over 1x4 and 5, and then move on to my actual work. So here we are. I'm really, really excited for these two, so without further ado, I'll dive right into:

1x4: It's hard to believe that I couldn't see... the majority of what happens in this episode when I first watched it

Why is Nini such a pro at making a scene with whoever her current boyfriend is in the middle of a public place? I mean, I get it that she's upset about EJ going through her phone — who wouldn't be — but maybe - and this is just a friendly suggestion — she could try and discuss that in private, not start a shouting match within view of all their classmates. Just saying.

'Ricky would never steal my phone' — well, perhaps not, but he's not quite above deleting stuff from it, either... I wonder if whoever is writing this show knows that there are many other ways to make a relationship unhealthy... it's not funny anymore. Just repetitive.

Ahhh Natalie and her emotional support hamster! At least there's one good thing about this scene.

Sure, Ricky, blame Big Red for the fact that you misplace your stuff... a very nice best friend he's got, indeed.

Gosh, everything is so awkward and there is just so much tension all over the place — Ricky's parents, then EJ and Nini, and then Carlos just being oblivious to the fact that they just broke up... you know, that last part just made me laugh. And then Ricky's reaction to his parents legally separating just broke my heart. That boy's been through too much.

Big Red being completely clueless about theatre terms is super funny and endearing, but let me just put myself in his shoes for a sec. He's followed his best friend into a badly thought-out scheme to get back together with his ex, got dragged into joining the crew, and is now expected to know what everything is. I would not put up with that... ok, who are we kidding, I'm a massive pushover and would put up with anything, but my point is... he shouldn't have to. At least people are doing the bare minimum to help him learn and nobody's laughed at him for not knowing. That's the good thing about this crew.

Ok, so I have posted about my thoughts of their take on What I've Been Looking For before, back when the episode was brand new, so I won't go into detail about that. In short, I think they've got the arrangement all wrong considering that it is a plot point in the original movie, but... the execution is funny. The scene is about Nini and EJ's post-breakup tension and it shows. I just kind of wish now Miss Jenn had pulled Nini out and put Gina in, even just for this rehearsal — and I might or might not be saying this as a Portwell shipper.

Miss Jenn is done with the students' personal drama and honestly, I'm right behind her. These kids are being completely unprofessional — and well, I realise that we can't expect them to be professional at this stage, but... they could at least try to concentrate on rehearsal and not their personal lives for a second.

Ricky hugging a cushion is my spirit animal. That's it, that's the comment.

Ahhh the tension between EJ and Gina though... 'around here seniors don't follow sophomores' — well, we'll see how it goes, Mr. Senior.

What gives Nini the right to shout at strangers about their relationship? I am honestly so frustrated with her these days. Wonder why I never was during season 1. The reasons are all there.

'He loves you' — yeah, like a little sister, he does. Also, Ash is so precious, always trying to see the good in other people. EJ 1.0 is so lucky he had her as an example.

Ok, I'm not going to go into what an amazing best friend Big Red is because we all know that (plus I'm saving it for a certain scene in 1x5), but this must be so hard for him. I mean, he's trying his absolute best to help Ricky feel better and distract him from his problems, and Ricky is turning everything down. I mean, I guess I understand where he's coming from too, but I'm unable to look at things through the lead-centric lens alone anymore. I'm more aware of non-lead characters now (some more so than others) and this is putting a whole new spin on my perception of everything that happens.

I've got no idea how Big Red can sleep with all this noise, though. I could never. But to each their own.

'perfect on paper' — that's EJ 1.0 to a T. I've got to give Nini that.

Ricky wearing the pride t-shirt... we love to see it.

See, this is why I keep forgetting why I ever shipped Rini and then remembering again... their chemistry is just so on-again-off-again, and here it's definitely present, but I just need a couple with consistent chemistry, you know. Hey, isn't that kind of what All I Want is about? Kind of. I don't know. I've been unable to listen to that song ever since it got big irl. I have this... problem with media that becomes popular and mainstream... I mean, I never hold a grudge against things just for being popular, but I just... relate to underrated stuff much easier. Not because it's underrated, but it just so happens that nearly everything I like and relate to is underrated in some capacity. Even HSMTMTS itself — it's practically unheard of here in Bulgaria, so I would not have found it if I hadn't been looking for it specifically. Ok, this comment got derailed several times. I guess I'll just stop here and move right on to 1x5 at this point.

1x5: A bedazzled tablecloth, a perfectly balanced unicycle and bad reception at the barn... not the perfect ingredients, but they can still... Work This Out

'Miss Jenn says that's a life in the arts... well, that and almost constant unemployment' — alright, I know this line is not supposed to be funny, and that it's a painful reality for a lot of people, but... maybe it's the delivery. I just laugh every time.

See, this is what I mean when I say I want to see consistent chemistry — Seblos have it. I mean, I really don't want to jinx things, but... they do.

Big Red seems to be in a more... outspoken mood today, I guess you could say. Too bad Ricky is still shutting everything he says down. Seriously, Big Red and Seb should start a club for people who try their best to be there for their loved ones and still keep being shushed.

I might be super frustrated with nearly everything Nini says and does (can somebody please tell me why that is?), but... flushing her dress down the toilet? Major mood.

Listen, I love Miss Jenn and that she's close to her students, but... emerging from a toilet cubicle and inviting herself to Kourtney and Nini's girls' night was... Will Shuester level of questionable.

Ricky being the mature one about his parents separation is... I mean, it's admirable, but how did he move past the impending depression of last episode and towards being the one who tells his dad to get up and move on? Well, I mean, good for him. But I think the issue is far from buried yet.

'Friend of the year'? Ricky? I don't think so. First of all, if he were, he'd know that Big Red does not have two left feet. Wasn't it you, Ricky, who was stumbling over the steps in HSM a couple of weeks ago? You're one to talk. Plus Big Red's been listening and trying to help while you've just been spouting off about your personal problems for... how long has it been now? I get it, Ricky has issues that he needs to work through, but he's almost legally blind in both eyes when it comes to Big Red.

Ok, but Ricky is the epitome of 'cannot solve his own problems but has a suggestion on how everybody else should solve theirs' in this episode. Maybe take a step back and listen to your own advice?

'My parents think I'm bonding with the livestock' — I've got no idea why I find this line so funny, but I do. And I've got so much love for this entire scene. Carlos' reaction to Seb's response to his invitation is just... the most adorable thing ever! My heart might just burst. Especially given what we're about to go through tomorrow in 2x10... I am. Not. Ready.

The entire karaoke scene just reminds me of... pretty much every extended family reunion on my mum's side. Her cousins love karaoke and are also completely tone-deaf. I love it that they're able to have fun with it, but my ears are still recovering from my great aunt's birthday party two years ago.

'When did you become Nini?' — Why does Mr. Mazzara know so much about his students' dating lives? I mean, Miss Jenn does, too, but he doesn't strike me as someone as invested in them as her. Idk, it just struck me as kind of weird.

'I didn't agree to photos' — please, EJ, I'm sure you'll want memories from your first fake-dating gig with Gina... once you're no longer fake-dating, you know. Boy, these two are going to have stories to tell to their grandchildren.

I've said some stuff about Nini, but... 'a bedazzled tablecloth' is the funniest description I've heard for Gina's homecoming dress.

'Maybe it's not actually about you at all.' Yeah, you tell him, Reddy! Ricky needs to get over himself.

The way Big Red sniffs out the drama, though... I was not-so-randomly reminded of that moment in 2x9 where Seb was like Carlos. and Big Red was like, 'Are you guys fighting?'...

Big Red doing a comedic lip-reading of Gina and EJ's dramatic scene is absolutely hilarious. I might or might not have sold my heart and soul to him after seeing that scene for the first time. But I just remembered how he said earlier that maybe he can't read lips and that just makes this 100% funnier — he was basically like a child who can't read yet making up a story based on the pictures in a book, and I mean it in the best way possible. He's a theatre dark horse, this one, and they should all be intimidated — or inspired, whatever they choose — by his hidden talents. Gosh, I love this guy. But can you blame me?

'You think I'm actually going to confide in you?' — Absolutely. You can't bully someone from your position of authority over them and then act like you're their friend. I do know now that Mr. Mazzara has hidden depths, but he had no right to be as rude to Carlos as he was in 1x3. He was right about one thing, though — Carlos doesn't need a dance partner to dance.

Ricky saying he was going to apologise to Gina and counting that as an apology is giving me major TJ/ Buffy flashbacks. I wonder why that is... * sarcasm *

Nini feeling like a fraud makes me actually sympathise with her for a second. But I feel like Nini's flaw of defining herself through boys and Ricky in particular has been addressed one time too many now, since it was first addressed here in this episode. If they make her and Ricky get back together again in season 2, I will riot. [side note: I feel like the Born to Be Brave scene says a lot about both Rini and Seblos as couples. Nini and Carlos both feel, in the moments leading up to the song, like they are incomplete without their partners. Ricky, too, has built his personality entirely around Nini at that time (and is still not completely over that in s2). And then the song comes in to remind them that they don't need a partner to be happy. I'm just thinking of Big Red's 'perfectly balanced unicycle' comment from the promotional materials, and of how he and Ashlyn, even when they're dating in s2, are never portrayed as being incomplete without each other. I guess there's a reason why they're the Beta Couple of the show — their relationship drama is nearly non-existent, and when it does exist, it's just caused by them caring too much about each other. Every other couple on the show should learn from them.]

Everybody supporting Carlos during the Born to Be Brave number just warms my heart so much... I am actually crying real tears. And then the end, when Seb finally shows up, right in time for the slow dance... I have a lot of feelings about this scene.

Seblos' dialogue here still kind of makes me cringe a little... but like, in a good way.

Yikes... Miss Jenn's getting into trouble... I mean, it was bound to happen sooner or later. But she's lucky she's had enough time with her students for them to love her enough to fight for her. Still, this is a topic for another episode, and so I won't expand on it in this post.

Well, that's it. That was 1x4 and 5. Those were pretty much my favourite episodes when season 1 was airing. And I can definitely see why, even if my views on some things have changed due to stuff that happens later. But, as I constantly say, that's what rewatches are for. In other words, 'once more, with feeling this time' as my choir director used to say.

[emisfritish]

Our gift to the world - Episode 7

Summary: Episode codas of an established Pang/Wave in The Gifted Graduation. Episode 7- Aftermath of the fight between Pang and Wave, a discussion between two broken boys. 

Notes :  It has been... a while, to say the least. In my defense, I kind of needed to know what they had planned for these two for the rest of the season if I wanted to keep these stories as close to canon as possible, so here I am ! Working plan right now, is posting the stories for all remaining episodes this week so I can be up to date with the finale on Sunday, and write either a nice continuation, or a nice fix-it depending on what they give us ;) 

This is set after the fight Pang/Wave have, but before Pang is called away to go and meet the director. 

Previous parts : Ep.1 /  Ep.2 / Ep.3 / Ep.4 / Ep.5 / Ep.6

Next parts : Ep.8 

Series on Ao3 here.

- 

As Pang is walking towards Wave’s dorm room, he feels the weight that’s been sitting on his shoulders for the past couple of weeks getting heavier and heavier the closer he is. 

After losing Time, after Korn’s injury, after isolating himself from his friends and after his boyfriend refusing to talk to him… He didn’t think his life could get any worse than it had been for the past couple of weeks. Yet after the fight him and Wave had yesterday, he knows that his assumption was wrong. Of course things could get worse. 

He’s not sure he’s ready to face Wave yet, after everything they told each other yesterday, but it is precisely because of their fight and of the things Wave told him, that he knows he needs to. Things between them have been a mess for weeks, but he knows he needs to see his boyfriend so they can start mending the pieces of their relationship. 

As Pang is walking to the room, he rehearses the speech he’s prepared and everything he wants to tell his boyfriend. He’s not sure that Wave will want to see him, but hopefully the excuse about needing to recuperate one of his school books that’s been left in Wave’s dorm room for weeks now will be enough to get him through the door, at least. 

Thinking about it, he can’t believe that things have actually come to that between them, with him needing an excuse to come and see his boyfriend. But well… He knows he’s partly to blame for the situation. 

Although it’s true that Wave had given him the cold shoulder for the past couple of weeks by ignoring his texts and his calls, which they definitely need to talk about, Pang is aware he’s not blameless in their situation. Wave had ignored him, that much is true, but he hadn’t made any particular effort to actually try to talk to Wave face to face either, too lost in his sadness and anger at the other boy for ignoring him for so long.

After their fight yesterday and the things Wave had said… Well. Let’s just say Pang is only now starting to realize how much he’s actually hurt his boyfriend, and he hates it. 

‘I can’t help but wonder if you think I’m your boyfriend, or just your tool.’

The words have been resonating in Pang’s mind since yesterday, and he can’t think of anything else. Is that what Wave truly believes ? How he truly sees them ?

He’s always hated everyone who’s hurt Wave in the past, who made him feel like he wasn’t enough, wasn’t loved. The people who are responsible for the trust issues that Wave still carries to this day. And now, Pang has somehow become of them, and the thought makes him sick. 

When he finally reaches Wave’s dorm room, Pang has no idea what awaits him inside, but he knows he can’t simply let this go. Although he doesn’t think he can take another hit right now, not after everything that’s happened in the past couple of weeks… He can’t let Wave go longer believing those things about their relationship and what he means to him either. He needs to talk to his boyfriend. 

Taking a deep breath to settle himself, Pang finally forces himself to knock on the door, before pushing it open when he hears Wave’s call to come in. He finds his boyfriend staring at him coldly from where he is seated at his desk, a carefully put-together blank expression covering his face. 

He feels Wave’s eyes move along his shoulders and chest briefly, a look Pang doesn’t recognize flashing across his face as they do, before he carefully puts his nonchalant look back in place. 

Frowning, Pang looks down at himself, before suddenly realizing what he’s wearing and what the look meant. 

Wave’s red jacket. 

He hasn’t done it on purpose, and it wasn’t a conscious move to try and sway Wave, or whatever thought might be crossing his boyfriend’s mind right now. It had just been a reflex to pull it on earlier, the jacket being his go to item when Pang wants to feel safer. He hadn’t even thought about what wearing it today could mean.

For the past couple of weeks, with everything falling apart around him, the jacket has brought a small amount of comfort, reminding him that even if Wave and him weren’t talking right now, he wasn’t alone in the world. That he had someone in his corner. 

He wonders if that’s still the case. 

Pang braces himself for Wave demanding the jacket back, half expecting it after the fight they had yesterday, but his boyfriend stays silent on the matter, prompting Pang’s small sigh of relief. 

“What are you doing here ?” Wave finally asks coldly, pulling him out of his thoughts. 

“I…” he starts answering, before completely losing track of everything he had planned to say while walking over to the room. “I forgot one of my school books in your room and I need it for class.”

Wave keeps staring at him silently, though Pang thinks he sees disappointment cross his face, although the look is gone too quickly for him to be certain about anything. 

“It’s right there. You can take it and go,” Wave tells him, indicating where the book is laying on the desk with a short movement of his head, before he turns back towards his computer, completely ignoring Pang.

Pang feels his throat close up at how easily his boyfriend is dismissing him, causing hurt and anger to well up in his chest. 

God, this can’t be it. They can’t be ending, not like this. 

“Listen Wave…,” he starts saying, trying to recall everything he had meant to say to his boyfriend earlier. “I should have apologized to you earlier and made more of an effort to speak to you. I don’t see you as a to..”

“You should have,” his boyfriend states, cutting him off mid-sentence. “But frankly, we’re way past that point now Pang,” he finishes saying coldly, and Pang can’t stop the anger that the words ignite in him. 

How is it so easy for Wave to dismiss him ? To dismiss them, and everything they’ve been through over the years ?

“So that’s it then ?” he asks bitterly, trying to hold back the words but not able to contain them with the anger swimming in his chest. “We had a fight and I messed up, and you’re just never going to talk to me again ? I said I was sorry, why can’t you believe me ?”

“I don’t know what you want me to say Pang,” his boyfriend responds coldly, not even turning towards him to say the words. 

“I want you to talk to me ! I want you to try and fix this with me !” Pang anguishes, and although he sees his boyfriend’s shoulder tensing, he doesn’t turn around to look at him and keeps silent. 

“Wave if you hate me this much, why did you even bother to help me that night ? Why did you come and comfort me instead of leaving me alone, if this is how you really feel ?” Pang asks, emotion making his voice crack and tears welling up in his eyes. 

The words prompt his boyfriend to turn around and look at him in disbelief. 

“Because I love you, stupid !” Wave shouts in answer, his mask of indifference finally falling, letting the hurt and anguish he’s feeling apparent for the first time since Pang entered the room. “Trust me, sometimes I think things would be a lot easier if I did hate you. But I love you.  And right now, loving you hurts.”

The words cut deep, and Pang feels the tears that had been pooling in his eyes finally drop against his cheeks. If you had told him that hearing Wave say he loves him would one day cause him so much pain, Pang would have never believed it. Still, hearing the words his boyfriend rarely says out loud coming out of his mouth under those circumstances breaks his heart. 

When Pang looks up towards Wave, he sees silent tears gather up in his eyes. The urge to move forward and comfort him is so strong, Pang crosses his arms against his chest to stop himself from reaching for him, knowing his touch wouldn’t be welcome right now. 

“Wave,” he starts saying in a small voice, the depth of the hurt they’ve both caused each other with their fight becoming clearer. 

“I just… I just can’t right now, Pang. I can’t talk about this. Not now,” Wave announces defeated, and Pang’s head drops, not able to look into Wave’s eyes right this moment.

He knows that he should give his boyfriend some space, knows Wave well enough to know that he needs time to process everything before they can mend this, but everything hurts right now, and he doesn’t know how to deal with the pain alone anymore. 

“Wave… We love each other. Please don’t end this,” he says brokenly, the words barely a whisper, and he sees Wave’s hands twitch from where they are at his sides, like he himself is having trouble stopping himself from reaching forward to hold and comfort Pang. 

“I’m not,” Wave says, a small wave of relief rushing through Pang before his boyfriend continues speaking. “But I can’t talk more tonight Pang. I love you but right now, I don’t really like you.”

Once again, the words cut deep and Pang feels his breath catch in his throat. He knows that Wave didn’t say it to hurt him, that his boyfriend is just being brutally honest as he usually is when conveying his feelings, and that somehow makes it worse. The words themselves hurt of course, but what hurts more is knowing that if Wave said them right now, it’s because he actually means them. 

At this moment, he truly doesn’t like Pang, and that’s one of the worst feelings. 

Defeated and recognizing that there is little chance of them going anywhere tonight, Pang finally nods in silence, before he turns around and makes his way to the door. 

Just as he’s reaching for the doorknob, Wave calls his name and Pang stops in his tracks, turning around to face his boyfriend. 

“I’m sorry about bringing up Nac and throwing him in your face yesterday,” Wave says, avoiding his eyes. “I know that’s not what happened with him, and it wasn’t fair of me.”

Wave still can’t look at him, and Pang feels tears well up in his eyes once again at that fact, but he shakes his head. 

The comment about Nac had hurt, it’s true, but not as much as Wave telling him he thought Pang saw him as insignificant and as a tool to be used. And definitely nowhere near as much as the thought of him and Wave being done for good, which is what’s been running through his head since the beginning of this conversation. 

“This isn’t the end, right Wave ?” he asks softly, feeling smaller than he has in years. Their relationship is such that Pang is often the one reassuring an insecure Wave, and for the first time, Pang understands what Wave must have felt all those times he feared Pang might be done with them. He hates the feeling.

Wave smiles at him sadly, finally looking up towards him, and Pang feels his heart clench in his chest. 

“I think we both need some time to get our heads on straight. We’ll talk later,” his boyfriend finally responds. 

It’s not an answer in itself and Pang is fully aware of it, but he doesn’t press the issue. He doesn’t think he could actually bear hearing Wave say that they’re done anyway, not on top of everything that’s happened in the past couple of weeks. 

With one final nod, he reaches for the doorknob and leaves the room, pulling the door closed behind him, before he slides down on the floor, utterly defeated. 

Small tears are running down his cheeks again, and Pang lifts one of his arms to wipe them away with the sleeve of his jacket, the burgundy red catching his eyes.

Wave hadn’t asked for his jacket back.

And just like that, the weight crushing Pang gets a tiny bit lighter. 

They’re far from okay right now, and Pang knows that very well. But his boyfriend hadn’t asked him to return the jacket either, and knowing how important it is to Wave, that has to count for something. 

It’s really not much, but it’s a sliver of hope that Pang can hold onto.

He doesn’t know what awaits him and Wave in the future, and he doesn’t know how they’ll fix this and get past everything, but the jacket is a small sign that Wave hasn’t given up on them either, and that’s all Pang needs right now.

The thought is enough for him to get up from the floor, and start walking back towards his own dorm. 

Things are a mess right now and so many discussions will be needed to fix things and to repair the trust they have in each other, but Pang has to believe they’ll manage. 

Him and Wave have always made the best team in everything, and he refuses to let go of that. 

Not now, not ever. 

[travllingbunny]

The 100: 7x02 The Garden

I love this episode. Mostly for the beautiful and emotionally complex Octavia-centric flashback story, for all the exciting revelations about the nature of the Anomaly and time dilation and the overall story of this season (all the exposition was done in a surprisingly natural way and never bothered me), and the way the two timelines were interwoven. It says a lot that I wasn’t even bothered by the lack of Clarke or Bellamy  - or the fact that this episode featured only 6 characters (plus some extras in suits), one of which was a deranged minor character we’ve never seen before. Episodes focused on a small number of characters and plots often feel more coherent. 

Comparisons between The Garden and Eden are obvious, the two even have basically the same title, and many similarities and contrasts, so I rewatched Eden yesterday, and I’ll be writing a post about that episode soon, too. I rewatched the entire show just before season 7 started, but season 5 is the only one I’ve never written reviews of, so this seems like the right occasion. it will also be interesting to rewatch Red Queen after this.

One of the things that I noticed rewatching season 5 is how well the cinematography has been used in seasons 5, 6 and 7 and how it differentiates different worlds. The ruined Earth in season 5 was mostly in sepia, yellow and grey tones, looking like a gloomy desert - except for Eden, which had normal colors. Sanctum has bright colors - it’s beautiful, but a little too colorful, almost psychedelic, dangerous. Skyring in this episode mostly seen in soft light and blueish-green colors - a peaceful paradise. 

Or is that a prison? A solitary/house arrest? I love this duality - it can be both. The most beautiful place can be a prison that drives you insane, if you’re all alone.

One garden, two serpents

Isolation is a theme we’ve seen on The 100 with many characters: Clarke was in a solitary for a year, distracting herself with drawings, then alone roaming around for 3 months, then forced to spend 6 years on a deserted planet, but she was only completely alone for the first 2 months, when she was fighting with nature and lack of food and water as much as with loneliness, and she was talking to Bellamy every day - who couldn’t even hear her - and hoping to see him again. Murphy was alone for 3 months in a fully stacked bunker on Becca’s island, but comfort is no help when you’re all alone, only have one and the same videos to watch and music to listen to, and you don’t know if you’re getting out. Octavia was the Girl Under the Floor for 16 years, and she had her mother and brother, but no one else; then she was locked up for a year; and after all the fighting, including the 6 years in the bunker with 1200 people she ruled over (which was maybe the time when she was more lonely than ever!), she ended up spending 10 years of her life on a planet with a family of two people - again - and no one else, and - just as when she was a child - with little hope that she will ever have a chance to meet anyone else. And here we see the effects of a  prolonged isolation from everyone else, with poor Orlando (that’s what he’s called in the end credits), the prisoner who dug out dead bodies and used a creepy doll just to have an illusion of friends. 

Unlike Clarke in 5x01, Octavia did not have to struggle with loneliness or fight to survive, but the paradise in which she had accidentally ended up in was also a prison of sorts, since she could not get out of it and was likely to spend all her life there, without ever seeing her brother or any other people, except for Diyoza and Hope. Like Clarke, Octavia found a family, and a child to take care of, but unlike Clarke, Octavia did not become a little girl’s adoptive or substitute mother.

The title evokes Diyoza’s line from 5x13: “One garden, two serpents. Eden never stood a chance.” Instead, they got to have their paradise here, until Octavia’s attempt to send her brother a message brought the Disciples from Bardo there to capture them. I’m not sure if that was a bad or a good thing - since that was probably their only way out of Skyring. 

(There’s also a literal garden in the episode, and  this was the first time we saw Octavia farm the land since 4x09, when she learned how to do it on Ilian’s farm. That was the last time Octavia tried to escape her darkness by having an idyllic farm life and a relationship, at least for a few days before the end of the world comes, but her past came back in the form of those people who recognized and attacked her - and she realized she wasn’t cut out for peace and rode into Polis looking for a war. She wasn’t ready at the time to give up violence. In season 5, she insisted that “Farmers won’t save the world, warriors will” - which Monty proved wrong. And now, Octavia has become a farmer.)

But Octavia’s paradise was forced on her, and it was clear that she and Diyoza didn’t really feel the same about living the rest of their lives on Skyring. The difference is, Diyoza doesn’t have anyone else in the world she cares about - everyone she once cared about has been dead for centuries. and she has given up on trying to change the world. She obviously wanted to do it once, when she was fighting “the fascist government who tried to take my home” and blowing up buildings, but she’s now tired of the violence, after being a terrorist/rebel, then a prisoner of a big corporation, again a rebel fighting against that corporation to save prisoners from being left to die just because they were deemed expendable, then she led another war - which ended with her baby-daddy destroying the Earth, and now she’s tired of the violence and wants to have a different life in peace with her daughter, who she didn’t even want to teach fighting of any kind. She’s also content to live without ever reuniting with the rest of the human race. Maybe partly because she was quite hurt to learn that she was supposedly in history books as one of the worst people ever. (Which she really shouldn’t have taken seriously - since it was Russell who said it, so these “history books” can only be Sanctum history books, written by Russell or his family members or other Primes. They left Earth around the time when Diyoza was just arrested, so it’s unlikely they even knew what history books said about her in the next few years - and even if those history books said so, they would be history books written under the same government Diyoza was fighting against.)

Octavia, on the other hand, still has other people she cares about in the world, most of all her brother. Not only did she leave a time when she knew Bellamy and others are likely to be in danger from the Primes - and she had no way of knowing they had learned the truth about the Primes by themselves - but they parted on bad terms and with unresolved issues and with no catharsis, and Bellamy would probably be left thinking she really died when he left her on Alpha - instead of learning that she did resolve her issues and find peace.  She didn’t know that her attempts to get back the way she came, through the lake, would never work - if she had succeeded, she would have probably ended up on Bardo instead. Ironically, only when she made peace with the fact she couldn’t go back and sent a letter in a bottle, it ended up alerting the Disciples - but it all eventually resulted in Octavia ending up back on Sanctum in the same place she left (whether she escaped and came back from Bardo or through some other planet?), and got the chance to tell Bellamy in person that she understands him now. 

There’s some ambiguity about Octavia’s relationships with Diyoza and Hope - at times it seems that Octavia is Hope’s co-parent: she lives with them and is closely involved in raising Hope, after all - not exactly like an aunt who just occasionally visits and plays with the kid. All three of them are shown as a close family unit. However, Octavia does not see herself as Hope’s mother - nor does Hope see her that way. She is “Aunty O”. Hope has a mother, and not an absent or inattentive one, but someone like Diyoza, fully focused on raising her daughter. Octavia and Diyoza may be seen as sisters - with “Aunty O” and Octavia telling Bellamy in the letter that she loves her like she loves him even though she’s a ‘pain in the ass’. Or they could look like “an old married couple”, as Diyoza called them back in season 6 when they were finishing each other sentences.

(But if we’re supposed to think that Octavia’s and Diyoza’s close relationship never got sexual in any way, in spite of the fact they lived together for 10 years without any other adults around and with almost no hope they would ever see another adult, then I guess one or both of them is really extremely heterosexual, real 0 on Kinsey’s scale. If we’re supposed to think that. Technically, we don’t know for sure.)

Anyway, this ambiguity of whether Octavia was a co-parent to Hope or not has caused some debate on Twitter about what degree of responsibility Octavia exactly had towards Hope and whether she was allowed to leave her. But even if Octavia is seen as a co-parent, I don’t subscribe to the idea that every adult, especially a woman, who comes into the situation of taking care of a child must immediately forget about all other relationships, concerns and desire and subjugate their entire life to taking care of that child. Especially when it also means that the child will be isolated from the world at large. I didn’t think it was healthy when Bellamy’s whole life revolved around protecting Octavia, either, or when Clarke, after escaping Polis in season 5, thought for a moment that her and Madi living all alone, as they did during those 6 years, would be an OK future for either of them.

Octavia may not have thought the whole time dilation through (yes, it’s quite likely Hope would be old or die before she returned from Sanctum with the other people, since she’d need time to find Bellamy and others, explain things to them and back them go back, but she still had hope (no pun intended) that both she and Hope could have more of life than and was still fighting to make contact with her people on the other side. Diyoza may have been right about the time dilation, but how did she imagine Hope’s life was going to be in the future? Yes, if Octavia left, Hope would end up alone after Diyoza died. But if Octavia stayed, Hope would still be left all alone after Diyoza and Octavia died, and never got a chance to meet anyone else, have any other kind of life, be a part of the human race.

One may argue Diyoza was being selfish, trying to keep Octavia there, and she certainly did take away Octavia’s choice and forced her to stay. Though, in her defense, she thought she was saving her life - but it was still was one of those “I’m making choices for you because I know what’s best for you”. And it wasn’t her whole motivation - it was mostly about wanting to keep Octavia there as a part of their family unit. Octavia called her out on the fact that it wasn’t all about Hope, it was about their relationship, too. Which certainly seemed emotionally intense, with Diyoza being hurt and sort of jealous at the thought that Octavia would leave her and Hope and that she may love her less than she loves her brother. 

The episode played a lot with the parallels between Octavia and Bellamy, with O using what she had learned from Bellamy to take care of young Hope the same way. And the parallel between Octavia and Hope as “Girls Under the Floor” were even more obvious, even before Hope literally had to go under the floor to hide from the Disciples. That would put Diyoza in Aurora’s role and Octavia in Bellamy’s. It’s not a perfect parallel, as Bellamy didn’t  have any other strong attachments to anyone or any other family while Aurora was alive. But, while Aurora seemed to have no other vision for the future except focusing fully on hiding Octavia, Bellamy tried to give his sister an opportunity to meet other people and live a life - by taking her to the dance - and Octavia was similarly the one who wished to bring other people to Skyring and was giving Hope the hope (!) she would meet them.   

The Three Stooges and the Anomaly

(Thanks @jeanie205​ for that moniker LOL) The one thing that brings down this episode (I’m taking away half the point from it) is the very unlikely degree of plot-induced incompetence that the trio of Hope, Echo and Gabriel displayed throughout this episode - so they could get stuck on Skyring, maybe for 5 years:

Hope knew the bridge was under the lake - she should have known the note could get washed up!

How come Hope didn’t know there was more than one door to the cabin? Or if Orlando built the other door, or someone else who was there while she was away, how come none of the trio noticed that other door?

Even the windows looked big enough for someone to come in. Why didn’t at least one of them stand guard in the cabin? Or at least somewhere close where they could see what’s happening in the cabin? Why were they both sitting somewhere outside? They weren’t even close to the door. Did they think Orlando could only come into the cabin from one direction?

Why didn’t Gabriel take the memory viewer with him when he ran out? Come on, dude, that’s one of the most important things you have there, and you know there is a deranged guy outside, and you just leave it there?

Still, I enjoyed this part of the story, too, especially with all the new info we got - which got me speculating the whole week - see my theories  here.

Gabriel is so adorable as an old man scientist in a young body and even the fact he is more interested in the Anomaly than in any living human is kind of endearing. We also got a glimpse of the nerdy young doctor who was once crushing on Becca before going to the mission and meeting Josephine.

Echo is finally starting to justify her main character billing this season, getting an actual storyline rather than tagging along around Bellamy, and she is already a much more enjoyable character. She hasn’t actually changed much yet - but she’s now put in the position as an audience surrogate, wondering what the heck is going and asking question like “Where is Bellamy?” while Hope and Gabriel spout exposition (they do it so well though that you don’t even mind it).  It helps a lot that she’s not around any of the Spacekru, so we don’t have to deal with the forced “we’re all close family due to the 6 years off-screen, which we spent in utter boredom and without any actual dangers we’d have to deal with” dynamic. Instead, now a character she’s interacting with (Hope) and Echo’s own hallucinations are constantly calling her out on her past actions, which helps fix the issue that season 5 created - the impression that Echo is the one character who doesn’t have to deal with the consequences of her past actions, with her past being simply waved away with “they spent 6 years with her and she’s now one of the good guys” (Although, while I like Hope calling Echo out, Hope got it wrong - Echo didn’t kick Octavia over the cliff after stabbing her, Octavia tripped and fell. But that’s not the first time in the show the writers Octavia has misremembered an event.)

This will be the second time Echo is stuck somewhere in a peaceful place with just a few people for 6 5 years. How much of this will be off-screen? It certainly helps that we’ve already seen her interact with Hope and Gabriel in two episodes, and the dynamic between Hope and Echo is developing, with Echo starting to comfort Hope when Hope showed vulnerability behind her fast-talking snarky exterior. 

Echo still doesn’t seem ready to “face her demons”, since her reaction to her own hallucination telling her she’s still just a killer and asking her who she is if she doesn’t have someone (Bellamy) to follow, was to ignore it and try to kill people and now swear she’ll kill everyone she needs to in order to get to Bellamy. But I assume this is just the beginning of her long overdue character development.

Was there significance to Echo plucking the flower and then looking at the sky? Was it simply her starting to appreciate the beauty of the planet? t It reminds me of how Clarke was  touching the flowers in Eden in 5x01.

Other observations:

Technically, I guess this episode was really Hope-centric, since she was the only character in both timelines. 

I’m not sure what exactly the scientific explanation is for Octavia’s arm healing the moment she got to Skyring. How does the whole temporal flare thing work? 

"What is it about Bellamy that makes otherwise sensible women willing to die for him?” - I see what they did there. I bet this is a hint about what the focus of a lot of this season is. Hope meant Echo and Octavia, but we know that Clarke’s storyline will also soon become about looking for Bellamy “her missing people”, “her family”, “people she loves”. On the other hand, I’m not sure how much it makes sense for Hope to ask that - she must have heard Octavia’s stories about Bellamy, so she’d know what it is about him that’s so special - his devotion to those he loves and how ready he is to do anything for them. But maybe Hope felt some of that same jealousy Diyoza did, or her mom’s jealousy rubbed off on her, because Octavia kept trying to get back to her brother.

It’s interesting that Octavia named “Bellamy, Clarke and Madi” as the main people she wanted to bring here. She didn’t mention Raven or Miller (as she would if she was talking about the Delinquents as a family going back to season 1, or even her mentor Indra, or friend Niylah. Just Bellamy and Clarke and Madi - as a part of her family she wants to bring. There’s no reason why she’d see Madi as her family but not Indra, so this definitely seems like Clarke and Madi are seen as Bellamy’s family and a package deal in Octavia’s eyes. (And that’s before she even witnessed what happened in 6x10.) Not that surprising considering Octavia’s “another traitor who you love” comment from 5x08 and her dislike of Echo. Ironically, almost killed all three of them as Blodreina, which is maybe also a sign of how much she’s disconnecting from that role - even though she hasn’t gone through her 6x09 Face Your Demons hallucination yet.

It turns out Octavia was older than Bellamy in 6x09-6x13. The green box was probably her peaceful life on Skyring that she did not remember. But the red box was the unfinished business with her past. It seems that she was changed psychologically by her time on Skyring even without remembering it.

Hope is now the third child raised on stories about the Delinquents. Little Hope liked Murphy, just like Jordan did  during his “rebellious phase”. Madi, however, was an Octavia fan.

I guess Orlando saw Hope’s name written on the door, since it doesn’t seem they ever met before. But where did the creepy doll come from? 

If prisoners all end up insane as he did - and they probably do, after such long periods of complete isolation - that’s a really messed up way of making people into “true believers”, by breaking them completely. A solitary confinement that’s years long? Cruel.

The Bardo symbol (Phoenix) was seen in the bucket and bottle Octavia was using, which proves that the Bardo people had already been on the planet before Octavia and Diyoza ended up on it.

If Orlando had no one else to dig out, I guess they always make sure to bring the prisoners back after they’ve served their sentence. But they probably killed Dev.  I hope we get the story about Dev and Hope in flashbacks. Seeing what his facial expression was at the time of death, that guy certainly didn’t die a natural death.

The Becca cameo was cool, and this was a whole new face of Becca, kind of cheeky and funny. But her comment that time dilation is “sexy as hell”... um, OK, Yeah, how lucky you get to “get to the future faster” and possibly die before getting a chance to ever reunite with anyone else you know? To be fair, she did not expect all the others in the mission to die and leave poor Colin on his own.

Gabriel “had to be sure she (Josephine) was really gone”. But maybe a part of him deep inside hoped she wasn’t..

So the Anomaly was already there when Colin Benson crashed on the planet. Hmm... that seems to go against my theory that the Anomaly Stones were made by humans at some point during the previous 230 years, but I’m still not giving up on it. Eligius 3 must have travelled longer to Skyring, if it is so far away from Earth and Sanctum,  I don’t think that “Beta” meant that Skyring was the second stop of Eligius 3 - maybe the planets were graded by how good conditions they had for human life. Which would put Sanctum and Skyring at the top, but Sanctum was closer. And with all sorts of time shenanigans going around, maybe there’s some way that the Anomaly Stones could have been placed there by humans. I just can’t believe that it was really some alien race millions of years ago, especially with the Anomaly symbols looking like Greek letters, many of those used in physics or math,  the gender symbols, and the infinity symbol is there, too. 

This was one of the rare episodes of The 100 where no one died. Though we did learn about some people’s past deaths.

Rating: 9/10