#we were not born to work and pay bills and die!!!!
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quietblissxx · 1 year ago
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asiananeurysm · 3 months ago
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friccafracc · 7 months ago
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DROP THE FIC OR IM COMING FOR YOUR KNEECAPS
ALRIGHT OK BUT I NEED IT TO BE KNOWN THAT I HAVENT WRITTEN ANYTHING SERIOUSLY SINCE HIGHSCHOOL OK
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“Something is after me. I know it is, I’ve seen it. It looks like a man, but I know that it’s not. It
. It’s face is like a mockery of something human- like- like if you asked someone who has never seen a human to draw or model a person’s face, their smile. No
 I don’t think any human would be able to get it that wrong.”
“And I’m not crazy, alright? God, y’all probably get that a lot here, don’t you? You people specialize in crazy. Not that I’m anyone to judge anymore, given the shit I went through before coming out here. I didn’t even know a place like this existed outside the Usher Foundation. I just
there’s some weird, crazy shit out there I guess, and when I heard about y’all, I figured I should probably pay a visit. At least let someone know before I die.”
“I know I’m gonna die.”
“I suppose I should start from the beginning. My name is Joshua Nelson, I’m originally from the States–Memphis Tennessee. Now, if there’s one thing you should know about Memphis, it’s that nobody in their right mind should EVER move there on their own accord, ‘cause you’ll either get mugged or stalked or both. I was born and raised there, so I never really got the choice during the formative years of my life. I’ve learned to live with it, though.”
“I worked retail in a gas station before
well, everything. It was a shithole. The kind of building where, no matter how hard you scrubbed and no matter how much bleach you used, the stains and smell of smoke would never leave. Instead just
mingled with the citrus of the chemicals. It paid the bills, though, and I was never witness to a robbery, so I couldn’t complain too much. The customers were docile and if I noticed anyone shoplifting, I kept it to myself. I wasn’t getting paid enough to give a damn.”
“We had regulars that would come in on a schedule and regulars that wouldn’t. People who were just passing through the city or visiting family or friends. You get all types in that kinda place, and if you’re placid enough to any asshole who’s having a bad day, everyone gets along just fine. There were a couple of regulars who were friendly enough, though, that I remember their names. Miss Kelly was an older woman, short and heavyset–she was one of the friendlier ones. We’ve got a lot of talkers in the south and boy did she make sure I knew every exact reason for what her kids were getting up to, or what was going on in a reality show she was hooked on at the time.”
“George Michael, a thin man in his 40s, maybe, always came in whenever he needed a new pack of cigarettes, I think he was a chain-smoker, cause he was in there a lot.”
“And then
then there was Hunter. Now Hunter was a younger man, maybe college age. A little older than that? Poor bastard was hooked on something, that much anyone could tell. He was gaunt, a little twitchy, you know, telltale signs of drug abuse. I could never tell what specifically he was on, but then again, it was never my business to know. I treated him the same as every other customer, we all knew he wasn’t gonna cause any harm, he usually came in for food, chips and hotdogs and stuff and he never caused a fuss.”
“I think
 I think Hunter is dead.”
“One day he came in, I think it was a Wednesday or something cause it was slow that afternoon, and he burst through the door. Well–maybe not burst, but he came in the building like he was racing to get indoors first before someone else. The guy was usually jittery and, I’ll admit, a little shifty usually, but this was full blown paranoia. It startled me at first, his intensity, and he made a b-line towards the back of the store and ducked behind one of the shelves. Maybe not duck completely like ducking for cover, but it was obvious he was hiding. It almost made me expect the police or some drug lord to come storming through the door, but nobody else came.”
“Hunter stayed pacing in the building for a good 20 or 30 minutes, periodically lifting his head to crane his neck and peer out the window or the glass of the door. I checked once or twice as well, but if someone was out there, I didn’t see them. Eventually the guy calmed down enough to buy something and when he approached the counter with his bag of Doritos he looked almost like he was going to be sick.”
“I asked him if everything was alright, but he just shook his head and left.”
“I didn’t see him again for another week or two after that. Obviously I assumed the worst. I theorized that someone was after him and when he didn’t show up when he usually did it was more than enough to confirm my suspicions. Be it cops or some random person on the street, I couldn’t decide which fate would be worse, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel for the guy at least a little bit.”
“Hunter was almost completely out of my mind when I saw him again. I was surprised. By all accounts, it didn’t look like anything had changed about him. Maybe aside from the fact that his posture was way better than it usually was when I saw him, but other than that, nothing was out of the ordinary.”
“Business went on as usual and when he came up to the till with a liter of coke, I offered him a ‘Welcome Back’ and rang him up.”
“When I turned back to him, he was smiling. For some reason it was like a pit opened in the bottom of my stomach. I couldn’t understand why, though. It looked like Hunter–patchy, unkempt stubble, greasy hair, thin face, sunken eyes. His appearance had never bothered me before, so I was struck with confusion that mixed in with the undefinable, sudden sense of dread.”
“‘Thank you,’ he said as I handed him his change. And he walked out the door. It sounded like Hunter, too.”
“Hunter returned the next day, and the next. Each time he was polite and quiet, and each time he smiled when I rang him up. I counted his teeth. They were straight and flat. When I counted mine in the mirror when I smiled, I saw 17 or 18. Hunter’s counted 24.”
“Maybe he has a dental problem that I didn’t notice until now, I told myself. Human bodies are weird. Sometimes you have more teeth than usual.”
“The fourth day he came in a row, I saw his eyes and his pupils were
swollen, is the only way I can describe them. I know what people’s eyes look like when they’re high. This was not that. It was like they almost swallowed up his irises completely, and they were dull. Dull in the sense that the fluorescents overhead did nothing to cast any reflections onto them. It made me want to writhe and squirm whenever he looked at me.”
“I called in sick the fifth day. I knew Hunter would be back in that gas station to see me. I knew it was to see me. And I knew that thing. That..whatever it was. It wasn’t Hunter.”
“I guess a part of me was always dreading that day. I had always heard stories about people being stalked from friends of friends. It was only a matter of time before it happened to me, right?”
“I saw Hunter at the grocery store the next day, posture straight and face split open into that smile with too many teeth. I didn’t have the mind to be polite. I turned completely around and walked the other way, trying to fool myself thinking that he hadn’t seen me. I kept a pocket knife on me after that encounter. I probably should have been before, but hindsight is always 20/20.”
“Each time I saw him after that, it was worse. On the street to my apartment, his eyes were too wide and his grinning mouth was slightly agape. A crude facsimile of delight as I rushed past him. I stopped going into work when I started to spot him everywhere I went. Every destination no matter how far or random, he was there, grinning at me. He knew where I lived, that I had no doubt. So I went to a friend’s one night hoping to throw him off. Maybe I could move out and lose him. Lord knows I didn’t have the money to break my lease early, but I was desperate.”
“My friend suggested I call the police, but for some reason I was convinced that wouldn’t help. Cops usually only made things worse in that town, and I had a sinking feeling going that route would only waste my time.”
“The final straw was the second night I was crashing on my friend’s couch. I was exhausted, the past few weeks spent sleepless and paranoid and I was ready to finally pass out when I heard a light, rhythmic tapping on the window behind my head.”
“It’s just the wind, I thought to myself. A tree branch or something scraping against the glass. The exhaustion was completely gone, my pounding heart and pumping adrenaline overpowering any lame excuse that I would be stupid enough to be reassured by.”
“I didn’t move from where I lay. Tap. Tap. Tap. Came through the window once again.”
“I don’t know why I laid there for so long, unmoving, convinced that if I didn’t turn around, whatever it was outside would lose interest and leave. I really, really wanted it to leave.”
“I lay still for what felt like hours, every muscle in my body wound up and tense and ready to leap into action at any given opportunity. I was praying the opportunity would never come.”
“I don’t know how long it was when the tapping ceased, but it was long before I finally managed to relax. It seemed like my strategy worked. What an idiotic thing to think. Like I was a child hiding from an imaginary monster in the dark. Like the logic of not giving a stalker any attention so it would go away was sound. No. I think it was that false hope that landed me in this situation.”
“Because when that tapping came again, I wasn’t prepared to turn around. But I did. I turned around and what I saw in the darkness through that glass was
 I don’t know what it was. I know it had eyes and teeth. It was grinning, but its teeth stretched well beyond what would be the borders of its face. God, I couldn’t see its face. I knew it was Hunter, though. It had those same lightless eyes that stared back at me every time I closed my own. Dead and dark and dull and staring at me–eating at me, wide and gleeful and spilling into the shadow that I could only assume was a part of the creature, itself. Its form took up nearly the entirety of the window, blocking the outside world. It didn’t move.”
“I screamed. I screamed and closed the curtains and I hid. This woke my friend of course, and she came stumbling out of her room, looking bleary but alert. I tried to signal to her not to go to the window or do anything or to call the police. Thankfully she got the message and the cops were there within the hour.”
“They didn’t find anything. Or anyone, for that matter. I left out the
the monster bit, because I assumed it might land me somewhere I really didn’t want to go.”
“They were about as helpful as I thought they would be. Told me to call them again if I noticed any suspicious activity.”
“I booked my flight here that very night. I wasn’t going to stay in that goddamn city with whatever the HELL that thing was. I don’t want to end up like Hunter. I don’t want it to wear my skin.”
“It will, though. I know it will and it scares me more than anything in the world. And I know I can’t escape it, either.”
“It followed me here. I saw it. It was still grinning at me and it was still. Wearing. Hunter’s. Skin. The shadow that was cast over it made it so I could only see the whites of it’s eyes....its teeth.”
“I don’t want to die.”
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feelrush · 10 months ago
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JADE CITY.
— dialogue prompts from jade city by fonda lee.
“what’s going on? you seem out of sorts tonight.”
“send me the bill for the damage. i’ll take care of it.”
“tell me, my friend. have you had any other trouble around here lately?”
“sitting out here alone? something the matter?”
“how am i still alive when they’re all dead?”
“what did you come for at this hour, anyway? spit it out.”
“you should have killed that man!”
“i fell asleep waiting for you, and in return you scare the shit out of me. where were you?”
“you’re the most important thing in the world to me.”
“i’ve forgotten the past. everything’s forgiven, now that you’re back.”
“ah, what to choose, pain or failure?”
“where are you taking me?”
“cancel the rest of the day’s meetings. i’ll be in my office.”
“wait here and don’t move until you’re called.”
“i’m sure you’re wondering why you’ve been brought here.”
“may i
 ask a candid question?”
“i’ll wait for an answer, but not for long.”
“you have to pay attention every fucking second because i can’t always be there if there’s trouble, understand?”
“sometimes the old ways are not without wisdom.”
“can you drive? can you handle a gun?”
“i keep seeing you, but i don’t know your name.”
“do you have anything to drink? it’s still hot inside.”
“whatever it is you decide to do, i’ll support you. i’ve told you that before, and it hasn’t changed.”
“i’m afraid i’m paying you this visit out of a sense of great concern.”
“there needs to be a balance of power.”
“what do they think we are? hired thugs?”
“why the fuck are you here?”
“i knocked but you must not have heard me.”
“you look as if you could use a massage.”
“i visit here too often; it’s not safe for you.”
“i have a gun, and i know how to use it. i won’t be a burden. i can take care of myself.”
“we’ll talk about this later.”
“from now on, i’ll be sure to call out hello to you when i’m still well out of knife range.”
“what can i do to help?”
“if anyone tried to kill you, you deserved it.”
“what is wrong with you? you don’t know who you are anymore.”
“give me your blessing, or condemn me, but don’t wash your hands of me.”
“not ready to die yet. gonna quit while i’m ahead.”
“you work for me now, you understand?”
“i’m disappointed you didn’t accept my offer.”
“we can plan a wedding, a big one. pick a date. i was thinking soon—springtime, what do you think?”
“you can do anything else you want, but not this.”
“it’s not that i think you’re boring. it’s just that keeping watch over you isn’t all that exciting, you know.”
“and here i was, starting to think all our meetings were because you were working up to hitting on me.”
“where and how did you fuck up?”
“risk your own life how you like, but leave me alone to live mine.”
“i’m not a coward.”
“i’ve never asked you for anything, but i’m asking you now, to keep this secret.”
“you do a good job, you make a big impression, show just how valuable you can be—that’s when we talk for real.”
“you were fantastic out there tonight.”
“do you want to get something to eat? we can do it another time if you’d rather go out with your friends tonight.”
“please don’t kill him.”
“must you leave so soon? come back to bed. stay the night.”
“heaven help me. i’m going to kill them all.”
“betrayal, murder, and war have a way of ruining one’s plans.”
“i could still kill him for you.”
“i can kill my ex-boyfriends myself.”
“don’t look like that. like you think i’m disappointed in you when i’m not.”
“i couldn’t sleep and wondered if you’d be kind enough to join me for a cup of tea.”
“it’s been a long day, and i don’t think i’d be very good company right now.”
“but what’s the value of silly pride compared to doing what’s best for the people one loves?”
“expectations are a funny thing. when you’re born with them, you resent them. when you’ve never been given any, you feel the lack of them your whole life.”
“people are cruel. don’t tempt them with arrogance.”
“so long as i live, i’ll never turn my back on a friend.”
“get out of my sight! i never want to see you again!”
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inactivewattpadauthor · 9 months ago
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Kano x Teen Reader: Brat
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With the help of Character ai ~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Next time, I could find something even bigger for ya, mate." Kano enters the bar with a few of his men, looking forward to a nice drink or more after a nice paying mission.
He sits at the rusty, old bar and orders his usual beer bottle, not taking care of the hooded person he sat next to. You were just waiting for this moment.
"Kano!" A familiar young voice called his name as he was chugging down his beer. He choked on it as he got startled.
Setting it down aggressively he looked at the person wearing the hoodie.
Knowing you have his attention now, you spun on the bar stool to reveal your face. "Have you finally considered hiring me, now?" You asked with excitement.
"Oh, for the love of- not this little twerp again, I ain’t got the time to entertain some little wanker
" Kano groans, rubbing his temples.
"Come on! I already told you! I'm good at stealing shit! The Black Dragon consists on thieves, right?" You try to convince him.
"I may as well hire a little turd that was born yesterday if I consider hiring you! You'd die the first five minutes you join us." Kano snarked.
"Just think about it! The other day I stole some jackass' wallet! He ain't got much in there, but it was enough to get me some pop." You reminisced, crossing your legs on the old stool.
"OoOoOoh! So you pickpocket someone? That's nothin' special, darlin. We kill people." He bluntly states, narrowing his real eye at you.
"Mkay." You shrug off as if it was nothing. "I can work with guns. Ever heard of GTA?"
Kano gave himself a face palm, almost snapping at you for even thinking it's the same thing. "That's a video game, Y/n. This is real li-" Kano had to think for a moment. "Look, it's not the same!"
"Whatever you say, boss." You murmured and looked away, so does he, focusing back on his men.
You glanced at his unsupervised drink and let the intrusive thoughts win as you always do. Quickly snatching the bottle, you chug down a good amount before he has time to react.
"Y/n!" He snatches his drink back from you. "You little shi- This is my drink! Get yer' own when you're not twelve!"
"One, I'm not twelve, I'm older than that! Two, you can have it back, it tastes like shit! You're almost out of it, by the way."
"It's beer, of fucking course it tastes like shit." He says still drinking it.
"Then why do you still drink it?!" You ask with annoyance.
"Because I built a tolerance. Now buzz off and go back to school, damn brat." He waves you off.
"Not until you let me join the Black Dragon."
Giving up, Kano reaches in his inventory , pulls out a nice band of dollar bills, and throws it to you.
"What is this for?" You ask with confusion but satisfaction.
"It’s just some shut-up money. Now go away before I regret lettin’ ya have so much." Kano dismisses you with success this time.
Smiling mischievously, you flick him off before skedaddling out the bar. Kano only shakes his head and orders another beer.
"I didn't know ya lettin' fuckin' children in the pub now." Kano scoffs at the bartender.
"She wouldn't leave until you came, I got tired of telling her to get out my bar." The bartender shrugged, scrubbing a whiskey glass down. "Besides, not like I'm letting the little shit get drunk and dealing with the rest when she walks out."
Kano nods in approval, chugging down his second drink for the night. ~~~~~~~~~~~~
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that-punk-adam · 6 months ago
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I wish there was a better way of just
. [vague hand gestures]
Housing. Is such a pain. To get and maintain.
Rent. You never own it. $1.4k a MONTH for a poorly designed and maintained closet with NO amenities included in that rent. A single person cannot afford to live alone anymore because I guess we decided to not start burning shit down once $7.20 is a federal minimum that isn’t sustaining whatsoever. It can pay a phone bill and feed you some days. Car insurance, gasoline, maintenance on a car, food, water, gas (utility), electric. You’re super lucky if you’re going to get 3k a month after taxes.
I had to hunt online for housing. I had to apply to places, average $25-50, to get denied at most because husband doesn’t have a job because he wasn’t living in the city full time. You need a car to go ANYWHERE in this fucking country. Car = insurance, payment, gasoline, maintenance. $500? $600? $800? On top of rent + bills. On a single income just a tad over 2.3k after taxes. We didn’t have a vehicle for a while and when we asked (begged) my in-laws (his sister + her wife) for help with a car, they had to drive to Kentucky for the cheapest thing they could find bc there was no way in hell for me to save anything. Nothing at all. After the online nonsense we had to wake up as early as possible for him to drive to these locations, all 20+ minutes away from each other, on a crunched schedule, on what would be considered a ‘last moments notice’. If I was on a 9-5 schedule there would have been zero hope of ever getting out of my parents house short of running away because the modern world only runs between 9a to 6p.
Finally, a paid off car. In-laws back into it and bust the radiator to hell. Totaled. No car. We didn’t even get the insurance and title switched over. They were going not even 5 miles and killed it. Now on our own we won’t ever have a car unless he can work (????) and we manage to have no accidents or try to enjoy life too much.
I was 2 minutes late today after waiting on a ride that took almost 15 minutes to get to the unit we finally managed to get. The second driver got to my workplace as fast as he could but it was still 2 minutes too late. The apartment hunting made me late repeatedly. We almost had a roommate and I had to be late for that too. I was so sick I couldn’t even be awake 2 times in the span of 2 months and I’m convinced it was a nasty variant of covid. Testing isn’t accurate anymore and those tests cost $20/each, not (100%) covered by insurance, and you ‘should’ use at least 4 tests over the span of 3 days.
Y’all. I have only been in the work force for 4 ish years and I am ready to retire. If I loose this position I’m not even going to attempt to look for anything else. I’m going to leave society and if I die then oh well. The concept of being born for the purpose of working until you die is the most cruel and unethical thing I could ever do to another human being. I love my hypothetical children so much that they will never exist. I love my hypothetical children that I will do everything in my power to make sure they are never conceived. There is nothing worst then to be born into this form of slavery and to never to be able to opt out of it except for death.
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cto10121 · 8 months ago
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Twilight Clown Takes—Part 5
In which yet another YT video comes out about how Twilight hate isn’t misogynist, actually, and so I must eat. Om nom nom
“Twilight Is Illogical!!1!1”
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We literally have an in-canon explanation for how Bella’s shield works in Eclipse AND Breaking Dawn. Her shield only works against illusions and anything mental. Anything physical she is vulnerable. Jasper affects you physiologically, not mentally. Alice sees actions; she doesn’t actually get into your mind. Jane and Edward’s powers are mental, so they do not work on her. It’s literally the same logic as Harry resisting the Imperious Curse in Goblet of Fire.
(Also, Bella does have a Quileute relative, Molly Swan. Just strengthens my Jacob-as-socially-determined-mate headcanon).
“Twilight Is Pro-Life!!1!1!”
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This is where Twilight clownery really delves into full-on deranged.
Every vampire in the Twilight Saga is harmful or potentially harmful to humanity, EVERYONE. The majority of the cast is (potentially) dangerous to humanity in some way, shape, or form. Calling Bella selfish for wanting her (wanted) child to be born is the height of misogyny. No mother who actually wants her child would choose differently. Bella had a plan to survive the birth—a very risky one, but she was willing to do it. And nobody and I mean nobody knew how Renesmee would turn out. This shit was unprecedented and ĂŒber rare.
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Bella was not willing to die for a baby. She was willing to risk her life for Edward’s child.
This was made explicit when Jacob in desperation (following a crazed Edward’s idea) offered to father her children in exchange for Bella aborting hers—only to have Bella LAUGH at him in his face. Bella dngaf about having children per se. It was because the kid she was having was Edward’s.
(Also. Rosalie wants more than a baby. Rosalie wants to be human, which to her basic-ass traditional 20th century mind includes getting married with children. A baby is part-and-parcel to that mortality. What is interesting to me is that, despite the fact that Rosalie is very trad wife and even pro-baby, the narrative still frames her as selfish and self-centered in her vicariousness. Jacob is absolutely disgusted with her for caring more about the baby than Bella, and Edward feels exactly the same way. That is one reason why Breaking Dawn is not pro life propaganda—it is above all a romance, in which Renesmee acts both as an obstacle and consummation).
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Everyone was sympathetic to Leah until she became a werewolf and not only brought her baggage but would deliberately bring it up to hurt Sam. Yeah, no shit the Quileute boys would hate her, ditto Jacob. Only when she joined Jacob’s pack did she lighten up (because she was free from Sam!) and Jacob realized she wasn’t bad, just dealing with a broken heart. And honestly a very capable werewolf.
As for Rosalie, nobody hated her for her backstory either. Bella disliked her because Rosalie hated her and wouldn’t even stand to be in the same room with her! Edward hated her as a brother “hates” his sister with two very different personalities. Rosalie’s backstory was very much meant to humanize her.
Twilight Is Racist Round ♟
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Literally every major character is magical. This is a fucking fantasy romance novel! Had the Quileutes been the only magical entities, Clown OP may have had a point. But not in this literal supernatural romance where even regular humans can have magical powers! What is this deranged clownery?
Twilight Is Sexist Round ♟
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“I’ve only ever watched the movies, but—” đŸš©đŸš©đŸš©đŸš©đŸš©đŸš©đŸš©đŸš©đŸš©đŸš©đŸš©đŸš©đŸš©
Bella didn’t feel like she fit in with her peers because she was essentially raised as a parent to take care of her mother. As in, paying bills. She didn’t have a normal childhood; that was denied her. Getting out of her parentification is part of her arc and drives a key part of her desire to be with Edward. Edward she never has to parent or take care of in the same way as her parents or even Jacob.
Also, her friends were canonically fake (Angela excepted). Jessica only was friends with her because of Mike’s interest and of the boys only Mike, Ben, and Tyler were interested. Lauren straight up didn’t like her.
“Twilight Is Mormon!1!!111”
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Clown OP was this close to getting it. This close.
“Twilight Is ~~~So Ridiculous!!1!!”
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Or it could be just basic-ass standard tropes for supernatural/paranormal romance. Y’know, since Twilight is a supernatural/paranormal romance.
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Yeah, this clown definitely hasn’t read enough romance novels, lol. Because let me tell you, Twilight is super sane compared to the shit I have read, i.e. bodice rippers.
And all those bodice rippers were nothing compared to the telenovelas I grew up with. Nothing.
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whiteshipnightjar · 2 years ago
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Marie At The Mill
by Joanna Newsom
(HORNS)
I see you coming down in your cherry wool coat bare to the throat like Marie at the Mill. Where might you go from your lowly amour where they hoard you like gold in the hill.
Sent from my side to the cold riverbed, Marie, you go ahead; I will follow in time. The work keeps me here with a few pioneers magnetizing a permanent line. Save for the coat, there was nothing to bring. It was found you could sing, you were sent to the Bay. At Seminary, you passed and were buried; I rose there the very next day.
For if you weren’t born at the right time, my dear, just keep trying and trying and trying again. As for the end, it is not what you fear, you’re just slipping a glove from your hand.
Like this: down, down, down, down your wrist down, down; the list of lives, husbands and wives, dozens of times around again and then,
out of all of the girls, heartbroke, alone, and to rot, and called me the heir of Melba and myth. I crossed the Atlantic, from Boston to Nantes on the hand of my dear Mr. Smith.
Then came his talk of perdition and sin like a cold winter wind come to blow me away. I was impatient and sought education on stage and the Champs-ÉlysĂ©es. I left on my own with the clothes on my back and my old name intact, and my own bills to pay. I left him in debt with his feathered grisette; alouette, je te plumerai. I had the honor to sing Mendelssohn on the Ternary lawn for the brave and the few. But it was my joy to be called to Bayreuth from who toiled a slave comes anew.
They prance for gentler worthiness and everyone who ruled a king may wander in rags for things done and undone and done and undone.
I wed Mr Russak, a fan, and producer of amateur music. All embedded in pearls, held court in Newport, amused myself before I threw off the veil of the world. And when in time he sank under the sea, what he deeded to me was enough to begin as secretary and past emissary; I rose through the ranks from within.
My carnelian snuff bottle carved as a peach and a small sterling wagon — well, that was part of the set — consigned to the waters of Elliot Beach, left behind with your Pall Mall Gazette.
And it was not luck, put me there by his side when the old Colonel died, and the adepts appeared, and all* what they share, well, you had to be there but I’ll tell you if you wanna hear.
Henry, your work here is done, Annie will carry it on, Marie, write it all down, ‘til the keynote is found. You run it up and down and round and round and round and
so I filled as I could all the gaps as a pilfer for good and only good, through some lapse that I’ve long forgot I wanna write to King and only transcribe the thoughts of the boy from the beach with his pervious soul. Poor little teacher got you, do it as you’re told. And even so there is danger here in the sun. Honey, tell me what has Sirius done? I hear it all but I cannot assume none may I follow to the Octagon Room; the boy from the beach beckoned and called, Lord, he’ll leave and unhand it all.
I see the clock on the wall, I hear the knock on the door but that is all.
(HORNS)
And when my work here is through, Henry, will you find me anew a little stranger, my old friend, hold me and win me again and again and again, all over again, all over again, all over again.
There’s a lodger in me larger than me saw the cross in the garden where your process came to be and cut you free, though your father tried to reunite with you and yet* he was allowed to die. Despite the lies, we are grist in the mill.
On the list I am Helios still, Sun-Wielder, Brunhilde, spun in shields, running round, and round, and round, and round, and round, and round, and round.
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unguidedgentleman · 8 months ago
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Re-evaluate Your Life
You weren’t born to work, pay bills and then die. You were born to live a life of purpose, passion, and meaning. So don’t let anyone or anything hold you back from living your best life. Follow your heart. Listen to your intuition. Do what feels right for you. And always remember, you have the right and power to create your own reality. It’s time to stop settling for just getting by, which is basically how most of society sees success: Just getting by and not really living. You were born for greatness and you deserve to be happy in all aspects of your life. I can’t tell you what to do with your life. Only you will know what to do with your life.
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Evaluate your passions and talents
What are you good at?
What do you love to do?
What do you enjoy doing?
Contemplating these questions will help you start to narrow down on your passions. Once you’ve narrowed down your passions and talents, you can start thinking about how to turn them into a business.
Ask yourself — What do I want?
Most people work their entire lives without ever taking the time to ask themselves what they REALLY want. Why? Because they’re too busy working and paying bills to think about it! But if you don’t take the time to figure out what you want, you’ll never be able to achieve it.
So ask yourself: What do I want? What are my goals and dreams? Once you know the answer to that question, you can start working towards making them a reality.
Be selfish
Learn to put yourself and your needs first. So what if that makes you look like a selfish person?! A lot of people think that being selfish is a bad thing. But when it comes to your career and the quality of life you want to have access to, you have to be a little bit selfish. You have to put your own needs and wants first. If you’re constantly thinking about what other people want you to do with your life, then you’ll never get anything done for yourself because everyone will have different opinions on what’s best for you and your business. Only you know what’s best for you! Be selfish! And do what you need to do for yourself.
Find your purpose in life
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Knowing and having a purpose will help you stay motivated, especially when people around you doubt your dreams and tell you it can’t be done. In order to stay on track to achieve your purpose, set realistic goals for yourself. Eg. if one of your goals is getting into shape then make sure that you take care of yourself by eating well and exercising. Remember that life is too short not to live for something bigger than just money.
Allow yourself to live
Don’t let other people make decisions for you.
Society tells us that we have to work hard and get good grades so that we can get a good job. Once we have a good job, we have to work hard and climb the corporate ladder so that we can make more money. We’re told that we need to buy a house and a car and fill our lives with material possessions. We’re told that this is what will make us happy. But is it?
You weren’t born to work, pay bills and then die. You were born to live a life of purpose, passion, and meaning. So don’t let anyone or anything hold you back from living your best life. Follow your heart. Listen to your intuition. Do what feels right for you. And always remember, you have the right and power to create your own reality.
It’s time to stop settling for just getting by, which is basically how most of society sees success: Just getting by and not really living. You were born for greatness and you deserve to be happy in all aspects of your life.
Follow your gut feeling. If it feels right, then go with it.
You weren’t born to work, pay bills and then die. You were born to live a life of purpose, passion, and meaning. So don’t let anyone or anything hold you back from living your best life. Follow your heart. Listen to your intuition. Do what feels right for you. And always remember, you have the right and power to create your own reality.
You know that little voice inside your head? The one that’s always giving you guidance and nudging you in the right direction? That’s your gut feeling, and it’s there for a reason. Your gut feeling is your inner compass, and it’s always pointing you towards your true north. Trust your intuition! It’ll guide you to the things you want for yourself and your life. You weren’t born to work, pay bills and then die. You were born to live a life of purpose, passion, and meaning. So don’t let anyone or anything hold you back from living your best life. Follow your heart. Listen to your intuition. Do what feels right for you. And always remember, you have the right and power to create your own reality. It’s time to stop settling for just getting by, which is basically how most of society sees success: Just getting by and not really living. You were born for greatness and you deserve to be happy in all aspects of your life. I can’t tell you what to do with your life. Only you will know what to do with your life.
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biosurvive · 1 year ago
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Because you asked for it. Though there's no one there to guide you No one to take your hand But with faith and understanding You will journey from boy to man The origins of Christopher Daniel Redfield
Born and raised in Hell's Kitchen in Manhattan to Danielle Byrne of New York & LĂ©vi Redfield from Gatineau, Canada. Chris was raised in bilingual household, speaking both English and Quebec French. His childhood was relatively normal and the family lived a comfortable life from Danielle's work as a divorce attorney and LĂ©vi's mechanic business. Active at a young age, Chris got into both baseball and hockey, and while he chose to play baseball throughout his school life, his love for hockey didn't dwindle as it was a hobby inherited from his Papa.
Chris was only six when Claire was born, and while annoyed at first at getting a sister rather than a brother, that was quickly removed far from his brain once he held her for the first time. Even now Chris could still remember singing a French lullaby to his baby sister as their parents looked on. Even during times when siblings fight, it became clear that Chris & Claire were cut from the same cloth, and they had a bond that wasn't easily shattered, an important aspect for them both with the tribulations both would endure in the future.
By the time Chris was a teenager baseball had become his life, though another passion from childhood had begun rearing it's head. Chris loved aircraft, his childhood bedroom was adorned with at least ten different model jets. It was during these years that Chris began to look into joining the Air Force and while he still played baseball, going as far as earning a scholarship, he still stayed true to his dream and revealed to his parents he was enlisting. Both of them were less than thrilled.
It's also during these years Chris knew he was gay, but I'll link the meta post I did on his sexuality here.
Chris had barely made it through boot camp when the news that his parents had died in a car accident had reached him. Only eighteen years old, he fought tooth and nail to keep custody of Claire, and after some help from his new friend and pseudo father figure, Barry. Chris was granted custody. Devastated by this loss, Chris was never granted a moment to truly grieve, now focused on continuing his military career and working as a waiter to make end's meet. During these years Kathy Burton, Barry's wife had become pseudo mother and the true savior for both Redfield siblings. Giving Claire another person and someone who would happily feed them when Chris just couldn't afford groceries or cook.
Chris was also left with handling everything their parents left behind, and because of the twisted legal system wasn't much. Forced to sell their old home to pay countless bills and debts, the duo moved into a shitty little apartment that both attempted to make a true home.
Unfortunately, Chris's life continued to become more complicated. Constantly arguing with superior commanders over their tactics and their dismissal of Chris's no man left behind mantra. Chris also began seeing a fellow airman by the name of Paulie. And after a little over a year of secretly dating, all it took was one slip up for both of them to get caught, ending their military careers and their relationship. The superior officers were looking for a reason to kick Chris out, and they had found their reason so easily.
Chris's dark period followed, heavy drinking, coming out to Claire in a heated moment of anger at himself followed by a complete mental breakdown that only bonded the siblings further. His life was on a downward spiral until Barry reached out with the prime opportunity of joining Raccoon City's S.T.A.R.S. division.
The unfortunate fact is that we can't prevent what we can't predict. How was Chris supposed to know that his supposed salvation would actually change his and his sister's lives forever?
One final sad note to end this on? Chris had abandoned his love for hockey after papa died. He didn't once skate on ice again until Claire dragged him along during his dark period. The two skated away for hours just like they had with their parents when life was far more simpler.
If Chris ever has a kid, ice skating would be one of the first things he'd teach them.
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quietblissxx · 1 year ago
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biological-catastrophe · 11 months ago
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Hello! I need to complain because America is a fucking joke. Vent under the cut as well as TW/CW list
TW/CW: School shooting, (preventable) death, cancer, abortion, homophobia/transphobia
This country is a goddamn joke. I could go on and on about how bad it is and I really need to because it’s grinding my gears.
They’re passing a law that makes it ILLEGAL TO BOYCOTT COMPANIES SUPPORTING ISRAEL. They don’t give a fuck about our constitution. In one breath they’re saying this and another saying the fact we can’t afford a place to live is because we keep spending money on Starbucks and avocado toast. And how the fuck are you going to enforce this?? You gonna hold a gun to my head and make me buy McDonalds or Starbucks?? What the fuck?? We already can’t afford to live here.
I’m lucky my parents are still letting me live with them because I could never afford a place to live. I’m pretty sure I did my math right but: minimum wage is $7.25 USD an hour. The average apartment is $2,000 a month. To afford JUST THAT, someone would have to work near 70 hours a week. Not including food, insurance, medicine, gas, anything besides rent. And with the pay I got at my last job ($10 an hour), I’d have to work 50 hours a week for rent. “Oh those jobs are only meant for like high schoolers” so you only want these fast food places to be open from 5-10 pm? You don’t want them to be open during school hours then? Hypocrites.
And SPEAKING OF SCHOOLS, the school shootings are not a joke. I think I talked about it already but there was an active shooter on my college campus while we were outside. We have lockdown drills so many times, it’s ingrained in us what to do since kindergarten what to do. I met a girl who got shot like 7 times and survived. I’ve grown up always having an escape route out of the school. Nobody cares. Nobody cares that a literal toddler was able to get ahold of a gun and SHOOT HIS TEACHER, and the teacher warned about the kid making threats before and the school didn’t do anything. Nobody cares that someone a girl rejected could bring a gun to school and shoot her and many others. It’s hypocritical that they ban abortion and then don’t care for the kid as soon as they’re born.
And god, the abortion ban. I live in Texas as I’ve said. Here, the law is called the heartbeat bill. Abortion is allowed until the fetus has a heartbeat. But by the time people have that, they generally don’t even know they’re pregnant. It’s basically a total abortion ban. And they’re so fucking sneaky with it. You can SUE people and doctors who have abortions. A man sued three women of a million dollars EACH, including is then-wife. And I also heard rumors of them trying to ban state travel for abortions as well which is also unconstitutional.
And do we even want to talk about health care??? I saw a video the other day of a girl and her best friend who both have cancer and can’t afford it. They can’t afford LIFE SAVING TREATMENT. Are you fucking joking?? People can’t afford insulin and are dying from it. People can’t afford life saving shit and die. What the fuck kind of dystopia is that?? I had to go get an MRI and it was THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS???? What the fuck???
And do we even want to get started on the homophobia/transphobia?? The ‘don’t say gay’ bill in Florida and the numerous drag ban bills. Texas is doing the thing similar to the heartbeat bill where you can sue a ‘person who is not conforming to their assigned gender at birth’ or something like that. Femboys and masculine women could get sued. What the fuck? It’s so expensive and hard to get HRT and surgeries for people. They are trying to raise the voting age so people can’t vote against it. They started with kids and now want to include adults into their 20s. I’m sick of it. I’m just sick of all of this.
And I can’t complain about all of this and not talk about the 2021 Texas Freeze. Basically what happened, February of 2021 we had a horrible freeze, at nights it got into the negatives (for reference, ‘cold’ here for me is in the 40s. This is all Fahrenheit. 40°F = 4°C; -3°F = -19°C). Our power plants weren’t ready for this. We lost power during a lot of this. Some people didn’t have power for WEEKS, people died from the cold because the power plant people were greedy and lazy and didn’t put in proper weather safeties. This could have been prevented. Pipes burst, people died and got ill, the state was in a panic for weeks. We had power about half the time, but god was it cold.
I hate this country. I hate it so fucking much. This country is a fucking dystopia, some sick work of apocalypse fiction. I want to leave so fucking bad. I can’t wait till this place crashes and burns.
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justforbooks · 2 years ago
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The guitarist Gary Rossington, who has died aged 71, was the last surviving original member of Lynyrd Skynyrd, who formed in Florida in the mid-1960s. He was a pivotal part of the group as both musician and songwriter, his most arresting claim to fame being his slide guitar work on the band’s imperishable theme song, Free Bird. He also co-wrote their most successful single, the US Top 10 hit Sweet Home Alabama, and wrote songs regularly throughout the band’s career, up to their final studio album, Last of a Dyin’ Breed (2012).
Lynyrd Skynyrd reached the US Top 30 with each of their first five albums, three reaching double platinum status, but the group was plagued by a horrific litany of tragedies. Rossington, under the influence of drugs and alcohol, had survived a road accident in 1976 in which his car hit a tree, prompting Skynyrd’s lead vocalist, Ronnie Van Zant, to write the song That Smell – “Ooh that smell / The smell of death surrounds you”.
Then, in October 1977, Rossington survived an air crash in Mississippi in which Van Zant, the guitarist Steve Gaines and his sister, the backing singer Cassie Gaines, died. The chartered aircraft in which they were flying had previously had engine failure; despite a mechanic having supposedly fixed it, both engines failed on the next flight.
“I remember most of it,” Rossington told Guitar.com in 2020. “The rapid descent, the screaming, my friends in pain like something out of Vietnam. Waking up with the plane door on top of me 
 The main thing is we lost our best friends – that’s the hardest part. Our motto when we started was ‘If we don’t make it we’ll die trying.’ And we made it but at a terrible cost.”
Rossington recovered, after having steel rods inserted in his right arm and right leg, but for several years fought an addiction to painkillers, acquired during his convalescence. He later formed the Rossington Collins Band with his fellow Skynyrd guitarist Allen Collins, but they split in 1982 after Collins’ wife died.
He then formed the Rossington Band with his wife, Dale Krantz-Rossington, before rejoining the rebuilt Lynyrd Skynyrd in 1987, with Ronnie’s brother Johnny Van Zant on lead vocals. The group continued to tour and make albums for the next three decades, despite the deaths of several members. They were due to embark on a 22-city tour with ZZ Top in July 2023, though Rossington’s participation was uncertain because of health problems.
He was born in Jacksonville, Florida. His father was serving in the US army but died shortly after Gary’s birth, leaving his mother, Berniece, to raise him single-handedly. He would later name his favourite 1959 Gibson Les Paul guitar “Berniece” in her honour.
A keen baseball player, he had an early ambition to play for the New York Yankees, but the arrival on US shores of the “British Invasion” bands, especially the Rolling Stones, fired in him a desire to become a musician.
His twin enthusiasms combined when he met Van Zant and the drummer Bob Burns while they were playing on rival baseball teams in Jacksonville. They formed a band, and the first song they attempted to play was the Rolling Stones’ hit Time Is on My Side. They added Collins on guitar and the bass player Larry Junstrom, and went by various names including the Noble Five, the One Percent and My Backyard, playing in clubs and bars across the south before becoming Lynyrd Skynyrd in 1969.
The name was adapted from their PE teacher, Leonard Skinner, at Robert E Lee high school in Jacksonville. The New York Times reported how Van Zant’s father, Lacy, had asked teaching staff to allow Rossington to keep his long hair, since his musician’s earnings helped pay the household bills and he could not rock successfully with short hair. On the other hand, as Rossington told Rolling Stone magazine, “some places we’d get into fights – they didn’t like us ’cause our hair was long”.
It was not until 1973 that they released their debut album, (Pronounced ‘Lĕh-‘nĂ©rd ‘Skin-’nĂ©rd). They had been rejected by nine record companies before the musician and producer Al Kooper signed them to MCA, after seeing them play a storming live show at a club called Funocchio’s in Atlanta. It was Kooper who helped the group turn Free Bird into a nine-minute epic, which became their anthemic calling card.
They had already made a couple of attempts at recording the song, but Kooper added the hymn-like organ passage at the beginning, and helped Rossington to achieve the distinctive sound of his mournful slide guitar theme. “It’s actually me playing the same thing twice, recording one on top of the other, so it sounds kind of slurry, echoey,” he revealed. He had taken inspiration from the slide wizard Duane Allman, of the Allman Brothers Band, who had also formed in Jacksonville.
The band’s single Sweet Home Alabama (1974), co-written by Rossington, became their biggest hit, reaching No 8 on the US chart and 31 in the UK. It was an irresistibly exuberant riposte to Neil Young’s songs Southern Man and Alabama, which the group deemed unreasonably damning of the American south, and in his 2012 autobiography, Waging Heavy Peace, Young admitted he had been “accusatory and condescending”. The song was later used to promote tourism in Alabama as well as supplying the movie Sweet Home Alabama with its story and title.
The band scored four successive US Top 20 albums with Second Helping (1974), Nuthin’ Fancy (1975), Gimme Back My Bullets (1976) and Street Survivors (1977). Lynyrd Skynyrd were inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 2006. The event prompted Rossington to say: “I don’t think of it as tragedy – I think of it as life. I think the good outweighs the bad.”
In 2018, Stephen Kijak’s documentary about the band, If I Leave Here Tomorrow, was released. Street Survivors: The True Story of the Lynyrd Skynyrd Plane Crash was a dramatisation of the Mississippi air disaster, released in 2020.
Rossington is survived by Dale, whom he married in 1982, and their two daughters.
🔔 Gary Robert Rossington, guitarist and songwriter, born 4 December 1951; died 5 March 2023
Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at http://justforbooks.tumblr.com
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dittolicous · 2 years ago
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well since its all my fault and i wont accept help, then i guess its ok to kill myself then. might as fucking well. since my life is such a burden on society.
they dont care. they always preach about wanting to help but thats just code for 'your a stupid idiot who doesn't know good enough but its ok we'll teach u perspective!'
n b4 people start on how postive affirmation is helpful, i fucking KNOW. i know its helpful but guess fucking what!!!! jobs!!!! dont!!!!! care!!!!!!! bills dont care!!!!!!!!!!! you cant positively affirm money into ur life when you have zero fucking passions or career drive!!!!!!
and besides fucking that, maybe, just fucking MAYBE, some of us are too fucking broken to help!!!!!!
stay active, im on my feet so much it hurts to stand, i ride my bike to/from work at least 3 days a week and used to do it 5 times until my fucking shifts were taken by a transfer! im fucking EXHAUSTED.
i feel like id have to write a dissertation just to get anyone to understand what im saying. because when you say 'i struggle with finding a way to positively view our society thar only thinks we deserve a roof over our heads and food on the table if we sacrifice 90% of our lives to jobs that dont even pay the bills' or 'i didnt choose to be born and im being held hostage in my own life' they say 'life is unfair' as if i wasnt fucking aware
i want to die i want to die i want to fucking die im sick of beinf alive its fucking pointless and nothings going to change that i want to fuvking DIE
if 'perspective change' was a cure we wouldnt have so many people dying in poverty and depression every fucking year
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eilinelsghost · 1 year ago
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Fifteen Questions for Fifteen Mutuals
Thanks for the tag, @actual-bill-potts!!
Are you named after anyone? Lol yes. I was supposed to have both first and middle be after a great-gma, but my mom liked how a waitress signed her name on a receipt when mom was 8 months pregnant, so my first got changed at the last minute. (on here I go by my middle because...uh...I actually hate my first name haha.)
Do you have kids? Yep! One excellent lil 3 year old.
Do you use sarcasm a lot? Why, is it not apparent?
When was the last time you cried? Last week, I think? I do some side work in abuse survivor advocacy and some things were pretty rough.
What's the first thing you notice about other people? Their smiles maybe? I need to pay more attention to this.
Eye colour? Brown.
What sports do you/have played? I played soccer as a kid, but spent the whole time pretending I was in the armies of Gondor, so that was not a huge success. Does writing count as a sport or....?
Any special talent? I generally feel like I'm good at a lot of things, but great at....uh nothing? So I'm not sure I have a special talent. Things I like doing, though, are playing piano and violin, cooking, making (and eating) rhubarb pie, puns, and now teaching myself how to draw - which has been surprisingly fun!
Where were you born? Illinois, USA
Scary movies or happy endings? Happy endings. I don't mind sad necessarily, but not big on scary. Also do not let anything happen to the animals. (My husband literally checks a website called does the dog die dot com before we watch anything just to play it safe.)
Do you have any pets? I have an extremely anxious little dachshund-beagle mutt that we got from a rescue. She is a damn delight and an absolute mess of a canine and I adore her.
How tall are you? 5'6"
What are your hobbies? I guess see the special talent question because apparently I answered it with a list of hobbies haha.
Favorite subject in school? English lit/writing and history
Dream job? I actually don't have a dream job! I spent a lot of my early life wanting to be a screenwriter/director, but now I honestly just want a nice, chill job that keeps work at work, lets me do a 9-5, and enables me to do the things I love outside of it. Which is the setup I have right now and it's working out pretty great.
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I think I've seen all my mutuals I'd tag here already tagged, so if you see this and think it sounds fun, consider yourself tagged!
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bukatra · 5 months ago
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Need a romantic song for Dean to sing to whoever you ship him with? Born To Be My Baby by Bon Jovi. It pretty much works with anyone, he loves Bon Jovi and it can be as lighthearted or serious as you want.
Rainy night and we worked all day
We both got jobs 'cause there's bills to pay
We got something they can't take away
Close the door, leave the cold outside
I don't need nothing when I'm by your side
We got something that'll never die
My heart beats like a drum (all night)
Flesh to flesh, one to one (and it's alright)
And I'll never let go 'cause
There's something I know deep inside
You were born to be my baby
And baby, I was made to be your man
We got something to believe in
Even if we don't know where we stand
Only God would know the reasons
But I bet he must have had a plan
'Cause you were born to be my baby
And baby, I was made to be your man
Light a candle, blow the world away
Table for two on a TV tray
It ain't fancy, baby that's ok
So hold me close better hang on tight
Buckle up, baby, it's a bumpy ride
We're two kids hitching down the road of life
If we stand side by side (all night)
There's a chance we'll get by (and it's alright)
And I'll know that you'll be alive
In my heart till the day that I die
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