#we like numbers and patterns

[oediex]

When I finished Assassin's Creed: Odyssey, I realised it was my 22nd platinum trophy. I had planned on finally earning the platinum trophy for Dragon Age: Inquisition this summer. But wouldn't it be nice, I thought, if it was the 25th?

In 2018, my friend sold me his PS4 after upgrading to a Pro himself. He knew I was interested in gaming and so I didn't have to think twice. He sold it to me for £80 and threw in Dragon Age: Inquisition for good measure. So I'd have something to play. My very first Playstation trophy was The Wrath of Heaven - by finishing the prologue of the game.

For a couple of years now, I've had only one trophy left to earn - beat the game on Nightmare difficulty. I've been postponing it, not for fear of failing at it, but for fear of the finality it seems to imply. I will, of course, still be able to play the game, but I won't be able to earn any trophies for it any more. A sad thought.

[bacchuschucklefuck]

this has been a roller coaster of a design journey but finally I can present you: class swap artificer!adaine and rogue!fabian

[vaguely-concerned]

I've been picking mostly only the essential flirt options with lucanis in the romance so far (I've personally found the dynamic much more natural and mutual when you do that, more like forming a solid friendship slowly and inevitably becoming something else and less like you keep pushing on him and getting little back b/c he seemingly just gets overwhelmed and goes into freeze instead), and I think rye is a pretty hard person to read at the best of times even though he's been Down Real Bad from pretty early on and their chemistry as people is naturally really good. so the way the almost-kiss plays out in this playthrough feels a lot like it has the added layer of lucanis realizing that no but for sure rook is flirting and not just being kind or a good friend* it IS actually happening it's not just wishful/fearful thinking!!! and then uh. maybe going a bit too hard a bit too fast in all the excitement at that revelation haha

*in lucanis' defense he has seemingly literally never had a friend who wasn't his cousin-brother before, under those circumstances I suppose some confusion is extremely natural if not outright expected lmao

[faaun]

Jack Marsh (2005), Friendship Otherwise - Toward a Levinasian Description of Personal Friendship

[blossoms-phan]

i don’t really care about stats because if I do I’ll get way too caught up in my head (I already do) I just like writing for fun and eating up all the other incredible works by writers in the phandom but I find it almost comical that my fic that has the least amount of kudos has the most bookmarks (well over half of which are private) (slight exaggeration on both sides) i guess I can’t really judge bc I have a habit of creating private bookmarks too since before I started writing I really don’t care in fact it would make my life easier for recommending fics if I left them public but we as a society have got to stop the shame around liking reading porn guys I swear nooooooo one cares what you like reading or freakin it to and it would make a writers day if you told them you liked reading it 👉👈

[unionizedwizard]

poisoned book investigation update: i reached the part of queen margot that deals with the poisoned book and this only made me more convinced that this is indeed. what happened. back in 2010. because 1) i know my mother well and therefore know she would kin catherine de' medici (yes yes i know. i know. what can i say. she's insane. it's a family tradition) 2) in the novel, the book was poisoned by catherine herself (she conceived and carried out both the scheme and the execution herself), and meant to kill her political enemy and son-in-law (but ended up poisoning (and killing) her own son). the exact method of course would be unsuitable for my own mother to imitate as it is the exact same method used in the name of the rose (possibly where umberto eco got the inspiration from, actually?), therefore as i mentioned earlier impossible to recreate with the kind of paper my copy of the three musketeers was printed on. but. yeah. not that i had many doubts at this point anymore but this is really. convincing evidence. psychologically speaking.

like for the. catherine de' medici kin part:

my mother always loved her as a historical figure. we did visit a lot of historical castles and museums and all when i was a kid and she always had a marked preference for 1) the renaissance era and history 2) the medici family 3) catherine de' medici specifically. she admired her cunning and force of spirit and ambition and influence. #1 girlboss supporter (she did not support the. you know. religious massacres tho. she didn't think catherine was a great figure to emulate or whatever. but she admired her nonetheless)

as i've mentioned before, my mother has always been a wannabe italian. she's especially fond of the italian renaissance and in particular florence and its history. in the novel the fact catherine de' medici is florentine is a key part of her characterization

physically there seems to be a similarity? dumas doesn't actually describe his characters' appearance much, but from the few elements we get, it seems to fit (= pale, grey(?) eyes with a cold and cunning look, short and stout but pretty, white hands (that she takes great care of), short and stout (fat?) stature in general, blonde hair, small lips, imposing presence that makes other people immediately fall in line & scares them (she was very proud of that)). it's not much but knowing her she would jump to conclusions and want to really. Be Like Her

sorry i know how this sounds i KNOW you don't have to believe me but i swear this is all true. inherited insanity and all that. the true Drow Ass Family

[secrettreestuffidk]

you ever think about how pretty much the only reason we use base10 is because we have 10 fingers and if everyone had 6 fingers on each hand we'd use base12 and never even think a thing of it and also math would be pretty much better in every way?

[databent]

doing long diviison for fun will have people asking "what the fuvk is wronw with uou" and well cant a guy havea little numbers. my numbers hobby. a special long division treat for me

[5-htagonist]

i am genuinely so crazyyyy about lbruuuuu.... like Genuinely Genuinely. its pretty bad guise

[girlbob-boypants]

The lack of consideration for how things layer in the dav outfits is killing me tbh. That and the complete disinterest in cultural fashion beyond things like "the qunari use ropes right" type shit

[institute-of-dolls]

So ive been teaching a doll to play poker, both for a socializing skill and social engineering practice. And WELL, it turns out being extremely low emotivity and low emotions makes one phenomenally good at bluffing and hyper-vigilance makes one okay-ish at reading people so. Yah. Combat dolls good at poker its what im learning here

[riftsmagic]

I want to enjoy this game so bad bc I paid money for it and I’ve invested 70 hours of my life into it already. but I’ve gotten to a point where it’s SO hard not to get critical every time anything happens. im losing it

[faebriel]

hgs brainrot has returned due to tbosas .. speaking of hgs here’s an ask abt the hgs au: if things were totally different, and Wilbur were to be a 12 victor, what do you think a possible mentor-tribute dynamic would look like between him & Niki? I feel like it would be similar to Snow & Lucy in the way that he’s just going out of his way to cheat n help her

anon u have in fact struck jackpot because this is a concept i was spinning some thoughts abt before bee mentioned avoxes and we went OOOOH at that!!! so yes i have considered rainduo as a mentor-tribute dynamic and would love to talk about that concept too :]

so for this concept i think wilbur and niki would be close friends throughout childhood from 12, and then in their teens wilbur is reaped and, well, no one has particularly high hopes (he's a writer and a musician at heart, not a fighter) but through sheer trickery and dumb luck, he makes it to the end of the games. wilbur pulled some pretty fucked up tricks to win - when you can't use brute force, you have to use your brain - and partly due to the trauma of the games, partly due to his shame and survivor's guilt, he sinks into the capitol and relishes a new life there as a socialite. to him, the old wilbur died in the games and the new one has taken his place - to niki, and to his other friends in 12, whatever the games did to him made him into every vapid heartless capitol victor there is.

or. niki has her doubts. they all saw how horrible the games were, but surely there is some part of him left, some part that's hurting, even if it's buried deep?

anyway.

like og spin of the au, niki is reaped and this sucks - this time she does expect wilbur as her mentor on the train, and she expects some kind of warm welcome (maybe even an apology for leaving them so suddenly and silently? an explanation?) but she gets jack shit. wilbur is jaded and cruel and unrecognisable and niki entirely hates it. this is the part where i REALLY WISH we got some time of those two beefing with each other directly in canon (or at least interactions while niki was So Mad at him) but it's okay we fly blind. niki feels abandoned, lonely, thrown off of her kilter - she expected an ally in this place, but she doesn't recognise the person wilbur has become. she doesn't recognise his shallowness (...much), his ruthless advice for the arena, the way he doesn't seem to care for anything. she's scared and now she's lonely and it pisses her off - their mentorship is fraught. here are some thoughts from discord on that:

i tend to think of niki as a bit naïve before l'manberg or even doomsday - i think this is an au where this streak would come out real strong, and niki is stubborn that she can get through the games without losing herself. stubborn that she can stop things, that she can protect people. i don't think wilbur is cold enough (or, really, can bear to say aloud) to say that her odds in the arena are slim enough as it is, but he definitely tells her that she's making enemies and that her odds of survival dwindle with the more trouble she causes.

beyond that... hm. niki's trust in wilbur is almost unshakeable until nov 16, even when she outright says she doesn't recognise him anymore. i think she'd reluctantly listen re: don't burn down any buildings, but she would grow bolder each day she had to stay in the capitol. she gets more honest in front of the cameras. she makes more friends in training, and not the ones wilbur recommends. she throws barbs at him every time he makes one of those callous, cold-hearted comments about other tributes and rankings and odds. and besides, she's going in the arena this time, not him. she needs to practice her bravery.

it's like... she hasn't given up on him. she thinks the old wilbur is in there somewhere. (she is wrong. that is not how trauma works.) but she won't hold her tongue just because she

for extra angst points could definitely play up the whole 'feeling abandoned' angle between them as niki goes into the arena - probably due to how fraught their friendship gets leading up to the games. niki wants to focus on them and their friendship, wilbur has stringently cut off (almost) everything from 12 and refuses to let her in; he tells her to behave for the cameras, she tells him she never will. i think the last point in that screenshot would also make for a super tasty argument where niki feels wilbur has gone astray, that he's abandoned 12, and that he'll probably do nothing but sit on his ass and watch her die and he can't even bring himself to care about her anymore, can he? just more fodder for the arena. and honestly, i think wilbur would passively agree with most of that - he values niki's opinion, after all, even now, and if she says he's rapidly descending into a lost cause then she must be right. and it's niki, so she will be fine, and he goes to his bedroom that night and tries to pretend he is sleeping perfectly fine instead of feeling paralysed with fear.

okay now onto the games - YES HE SO WOULD. or at least i think he would go out of his way to help. as for cheating - he's a recent victor for 12 and i think he would value tommy (no doubt a link to him... i think they'd be in touch in this au also) too much to risk the punishment falling onto him as well. i get the vibes this is a games closer to 74th than 10th, so there are far fewer opportunities to cheat and the consequences of getting caught are higher. but schmoozing up sponsors? making stupid ass radio interviews or whatever to talk up niki's odds? sharing anecdotes from their childhood - some real, some entirely fabricated - across capitol airwaves to stoke their sympathy? 100%. with less to lose in this au, i think niki would be far less inclined to play nice for the cameras - i hope you starve, she spits at one of them, and wilbur appears on a talkshow two days later as she scrambles for survival in the arena to talk up how she always saved loaves from the bakery for the poorest mothers and children in 12. he borrows and begs and swindles to the point where it feels like cheating. but hey, this new wilbur is capitol-branded. he knows how to play the game.

if anything he probably sinks into the game a little too much. self-preservation is not his forte. probably wracks up a few heavy debts and favours to owe, but those are not priority until niki is out of the arena, alive. as long as she wins, and as long as the family he has isn't in danger, he will manage. wow it would suck if at some point those two goals became impossible to co-achieve. anyway

i kind of see niki's victory in the arena being similar to the one in the main au - if only because planning out an entire games is hard for meee >-< . she walks in bolder and braver for sure, and with a less strategic pick of allies, but they all get picked off and she spends a few weeks so terrified she can barely sleep and then she ruptures some fuel line and sets the arena alight with a fire that burns brighter and more ravenously than it should. but she wins, and she's airlifted out of a filthy, muddy creek she had resigned herself to die in, and wilbur barges his way through as many peacekeepers so that he can actually see her with her burnt skin and hair and unfocused eyes and trust that what was on the screens wasn't a fluke, and that they made it. and then it's just a matter of surviving the after.

i'm sure there are some other random quirks or tidbits i can think of re: this take on a c!rainduo hunger games au but these are my base thoughts!!

[gibbearish]

so like i want to talk more abt what suicidal means but the problem is "suicidal ideation presents in two general forms, active and passive. the thing most people think of as suicidal is the active version, where the person *actively* desires to be dead and/or is making a plan to get there. the passive form however gets almost no attention in media so many people experiencing it are unaware they are even depressed, much less passively suicidal. some examples: not wanting to experience death but feeling like you wouldn't mind if you didn't wake up tomorrow or just stopped existing; feeling deeply exhausted with just the entire concept of being alive; even feeling like you want to run away, change your name, and start a whole new life; none of these look like suicidal ideation to most people because they don't involve actively doing anything to get from point a to point b, especially the more abstract ones like the start a new life thing - but remember that in order to truly start a whole new life, you have to destroy your current one. it's not suicidal as in wanting to actually DIE die, it's just. wanting something close enough to scratch the itch. but just because you haven't booked the ticket doesn't mean you don't still revisit the 'vacation activities at point b' tab occasionally to daydream, yknow?" is i think very informative and specific, but its also quite long and run on-y so people are v likely to tap out like a third of the way through it, whereas "suicidal doesnt necessarily mean wanting to die" is way shorter and therefore catchier, but is also the kind of nonspecific phrasing that gets you a thousand angry anons about how you said all suicidal people are just pretending they actually want to die or some dumb shit. so it's a fun line to toe

[talkfastcal]

Just saw a lady on my fyp talking about “red flags she saw at a daycare center” and all of the comments are early education teachers roasting her 💀

[cultivating-wildflowers]

the one time I said "I'm going to gauge this project" and the guidelines for the gauge still confuse me, even four days out

is it just me or is it impossible to get a 4 inch square that's only 14 stitches wide yet 12 rows of stitches tall??